Nephilim Death Squad - The Raven ｜ Straight Bible

00:00:00.000 Top Lobson Productions

00:00:30.000 we're live oh we're live oh all right there's a zero percent chance for live

00:00:37.720 uh live live for 37 seconds there's no noise on the intro all right the most highly anticipated

00:00:45.140 interview from the straight bible interview sessions is he just supposed to start like

00:00:48.840 that you're the boss you run this thing right how's he supposed to do this oh however he wants

00:00:52.500 okay you don't have music everybody requested this interview no i thought we did i see i'm

00:00:57.900 still not sure if we're live or not because i know he likes to mess with me and i'll do like

00:01:00.500 five minutes and i'll be like gotcha no it's definitely live i could see the is anybody in

00:01:05.080 the chat can they hear us is the is the audio good lock in yeah okay it means business you got

00:01:10.320 it 420 i could have sworn you had music for this thing okay we're supposed to back to the subject

00:01:15.360 at hand the most highly anticipated interview yeah like everybody's like when you having the

00:01:19.760 raven on when you having the raven they're like oh yeah paranoid american's cool man

00:01:23.360 prime resistance oh they're cool otis is cool when you having the raven i don't think anybody

00:01:27.880 is actually everybody's saying that so the main thing that we got to get at today is we want to

00:01:31.860 know your life story everybody knows where you stand on the rakes and the grays and the palladians

00:01:36.940 okay and the insectoids and the uh the dinosaur ones uh reptilians people know okay right they

00:01:44.480 want to know how did you get here like how like how do you go from like being a baby and at some

00:01:49.440 point probably somewhat normal to like who you are today like where like where did the story begin

00:01:54.640 I mean, that's a hard thing.

00:01:57.620 Should I start at babyhood?

00:01:59.020 Yeah, or even like your parents, grandparents.

00:02:01.060 You got some rad story about your grandparents from the 1800s.

00:02:03.760 I know you have a black grandma.

00:02:05.020 I do have a black grandma. 1.00

00:02:05.820 Because you imposed her face over my face one time. 0.66

00:02:07.840 Yeah, there's a misconception that black grandma is the sort of practicing new-aged occultist grandma.

00:02:15.900 Not the case. 0.98

00:02:16.620 Black grandma. 1.00

00:02:17.100 I don't know what black grandma was involved in other than being a slave. 1.00

00:02:20.400 Crime. 1.00

00:02:21.020 Crime.

00:02:21.660 Well, actually, yeah.

00:02:22.460 Probably farming.

00:02:23.040 No, no, no.

00:02:23.540 It's true. 1.00

00:02:23.820 i do have color greens like no no i have paperwork from her crimes she was she was a criminal what

00:02:30.840 kind of crimes oh i don't know i i don't i'd have to go back and try to find that that actually

00:02:34.720 would have been fun to bring up i didn't know we were to talk about black grandma but um okay so

00:02:39.760 yeah i guess i was i was born in new jersey in uh trinitas hospital in elizabeth and elizabeth

00:02:49.480 is a cool place because it's one of the i mean new jersey's you know original 13 colonies right

00:02:55.140 so everything up there is old why are you laughing you're laughing no i love this no because i never

00:02:59.960 see you serious you're always like playing games and trying to mock me i'm trying to be serious

00:03:03.460 i'm not laughing i'm smiling you look great with the blue glasses too i always have the blue glasses

00:03:09.380 this is a regular thing for me so um elizabeth new jersey is you know a particularly old city

00:03:17.420 in new jersey so old state old city and rawway avenue where my house was was one of the earliest

00:03:23.860 roads that were built through the heart of elizabeth so old state old city old road and

00:03:29.960 really old house is where i grew up more or less i mean old house too like like old haunted house

00:03:35.160 it was it was weird the architecture some of the buildings in elizabeth elizabeth is known for

00:03:40.400 being a shithole but there's a lot of really beautiful architecture that kind of goes hand

00:03:43.320 in hand you have the hood uh-huh and then you have beautiful architecture and historical

00:03:46.760 buildings and such so elizabeth is just like that my house was one of those you know we had you'd

00:03:53.720 walk up the stairs to the house and you'd have lion statues on either side of the walkway that

00:03:58.680 led in we had an engraved mantle over the fireplace you guys were rich did you live there with your

00:04:04.760 mom and your dad like who like no no so we we weren't rich it all went really south my grandmother

00:04:11.880 my great great grandmother worked really hard bought a bunch of properties um and made a name

00:04:19.000 for herself made some money the great great grandma and then like everybody just pissed it

00:04:22.540 away and fucked it all up so um i didn't live there with my mom and my dad i lived in an apartment 0.57

00:04:27.700 before that so the first three years of my life i'm in an apartment and i have some memories from 0.89

00:04:32.380 that apartment but my dad and mom separated probably when i was like three and shortly after

00:04:39.920 that by the time i was like four we moved out of that place and into the big spooky house

00:04:45.300 and that's with your mom with just my mom yeah my dad um he lived in elizabeth it's actually

00:04:50.960 very interesting because i saw my dad maybe enough times to count on two hands throughout my life

00:04:55.500 he lived in the same town that's so weird bro to be divorced and then like your wife

00:05:01.000 well they weren't divorced they were just separated they never like you know i was a 0.99

00:05:04.740 i'm a bat i guess a bastard does that make me a bastard no bella was born out of wedlock you're 0.91

00:05:08.920 just saying like born out of wedlock yeah i thought that made you well so anyway um i yeah i don't 0.98

00:05:14.900 know the definition of bastard other than like you don't have a dad i only know it in the game

00:05:18.380 of thrones context and i guess actually now that i've said that it says that like if god doesn't 0.99

00:05:23.520 chastise you then you're like bastards it's like it's like you don't have a dad it's in the hebrew

00:05:27.280 letter yeah well so i mean i guess that was my disposition then and you know they i actually 0.98

00:05:34.460 have memories from them together but they're weird memories it's just them yelling and i can't see

00:05:40.180 them i can only hear them and i can hear my dad's voice but i can't understand what he's saying

00:05:44.540 it's actually kind of fascinating because i thought it was a dream for a long time

00:05:48.260 and maybe it was but i think it was just them arguing while i was napping

00:05:52.520 and because you always napped a lot yeah i've always been a napper heavy napper

00:05:57.120 and um i couldn't discern english so it's just like dad's voice mom's voice yeah like charlie

00:06:03.760 brown cartoon yo just like that yeah it just you know that kind of a deal so you didn't like see

00:06:11.260 them making out or like loving each other i saw them kiss one time and and i thought it was really

00:06:17.420 special so from from three years old you have memories from like three i have memories from

00:06:22.580 like super young yeah i could see that happening if you have a mom and a dad that are together

00:06:27.280 only till you're three i could see that being a scenario where you have memories from

00:06:31.240 three and before i actually have memories of being in that apartment on halloween

00:06:34.560 and opening the door into the hallway and seeing like a dad and a son and the dad was dressed up 0.77

00:06:40.280 like a werewolf and the son had some other costume on and i fucking almost died yeah i was so 0.87

00:06:45.500 terrified i remember having a um entertainment center you put the tv in the middle of it and 0.91

00:06:52.280 it's got like shelving units all around it and at the top shelf was super mario for the nintendo

00:06:58.140 super nintendo and i remember climbing it waking up before my mom did getting out wanting to play

00:07:04.340 the video game climbing it and taking the whole shelf off the wall um i have a couple memories

00:07:09.000 from that place but anyway so we move into the big spooky house and and i would say that was

00:07:16.800 it's such a short-lived period of my life but it feels like super um important as far as

00:07:24.100 development what what do you mean short-lived so zero to three in the apartment and then four to

00:07:28.280 six maybe yeah in the spooky house yeah and i'm living there with great grandma grandma mom

00:07:36.680 aunt and her two kids so my cousins so both girls or boys three boys me my two cousins only boy

00:07:47.280 kids and only boy kids a ton of grown-up and just a ton of women oh wow i was raised by almost 1.00

00:07:52.940 exclusively women which explains probably a lot yeah woman no more than one of them right so 0.84

00:07:58.840 women the plural in the plural sense in puerto rico would be you were raised by many women

00:08:03.980 many no i don't think you're in new jersey it's many women it is many women okay i was raised by

00:08:08.620 many women and uh they were kind of cool you know my my grandmother fighting and bickering and drama

00:08:14.640 a lot sure they i mean they bitched and moaned at each other for any number of things uh they liked 1.00

00:08:19.660 video games which is really interesting super mario super mario my great grandma would get down

00:08:26.100 playing like super nintendo and she would scream at the tv like she would accuse it she's like 0.93

00:08:31.940 this fucking computer's cheating i mean this is like a she did not yeah dude she wait so that's 0.87

00:08:37.540 always been a thing when like the because i hear the kids playing fortnite and they're like streamer 0.99

00:08:41.720 or he just came to the wall my grandma was uh og fucking no way accuser was super mario brothers on 0.81

00:08:47.980 uh super nintendo was the one where you had the raccoon tail and you could fly if you kept hitting 0.91

00:08:51.820 that was nintendo we had that too they had every system and up until my great grandma grandma gene

00:08:57.260 she passed away she was still playing she had like the nintendo wii she loved bowling so my 1.00

00:09:03.020 grandma was like super competitive that that one were these ladies for jobs like selling dope or 1.00

00:09:07.580 like what was their job honestly that's a great question because it sounds like maybe a little 1.00

00:09:12.300 little bit of a dope house so no i don't think a dope house i mean great great grandma had money

00:09:19.160 she was a real estate mogul of sorts you know before there was any sort of like that's the 0.83

00:09:23.720 grandma that no that's her mom okay so her mom was like a businesswoman yeah accumulated some wealth 0.99

00:09:30.180 yep the daughter still had it still had it a little bit she worked i don't know what she did 1.00

00:09:34.380 she was like competitive competitive ice skater competitive bowler like she was a gangster in a 1.00

00:09:39.220 of ways um i only of course knew her but then the next one down the grandma's where she was like to 1.00

00:09:44.420 get pissed away a lot of cocaine a lot of alcohol worked at a bar most of her life she was my 0.99

00:09:51.700 understanding sort of like the center of attention the grandma grandma this is grandma betty she's

00:09:58.180 still alive no no no no no she died uh in this time so grandma betty was um you know she was the

00:10:07.620 one that was like clairvoyant you know yeah yeah she was the one that uh was practicing you know

00:10:14.180 new age did the great grandma outlive the grandma did the great grandma out yes yes she did okay

00:10:21.140 and the grandma was like what my grandma was a clairvoyant like she was a medium she was a medium

00:10:26.660 she was had crystal balls or she had a crystal ball she had tarot cards in the house yeah yeah 0.95

00:10:32.820 Yeah, she was remote viewing.

00:10:36.140 She was writing paperwork.

00:10:37.620 Which one's remote viewing, where you can see stuff in other places?

00:10:40.880 Yeah, it's this meditative practice.

00:10:42.060 Through the crystal ball they do that?

00:10:43.640 I don't think so.

00:10:44.560 Did she have a cup?

00:10:45.360 You know, like Joseph says, when he put his cup in Benjamin's sack, when the brothers all leave.

00:10:50.700 He was divining.

00:10:51.560 Yeah, he says, you guys didn't think I'd know you took my cup that I divine with?

00:10:55.600 No, I don't know if she had a cup.

00:10:57.160 I guess that's a thing, you like look in a cup.

00:10:58.620 It was weird.

00:10:59.260 So I know there's like a tea leaf thing. 0.98

00:11:00.720 You could look at a cup and read tea leaves, or you could look at a cup and read coffee grinds, all kinds of different shit. 0.98

00:11:06.120 But I never saw that from her. 0.98

00:11:08.840 My time with her was weird because she was, I think, in hindsight, my mother had me very young.

00:11:15.940 Not very young, but young enough, like 18, 19.

00:11:19.220 It's pretty young.

00:11:19.520 Yeah, it's pretty young.

00:11:20.720 And she was not about it.

00:11:25.880 Who?

00:11:26.360 My mom.

00:11:27.440 What do you mean not about it?

00:11:28.740 like she not into the clairvoyant thing no no she was not like a mother okay you know what i mean

00:11:33.300 is she still alive she's still alive yeah um and she so i was almost kind of groomed to call like

00:11:40.660 that my grandmother was going to be my mother she i was named after her son that was put up for

00:11:45.780 adoption okay i see what you're saying it's like the grandma grandma had a hole in her heart enough

00:11:50.340 to like no no she didn't have it together but she had a hole in her heart but the mom was 18 and was

00:11:56.100 was like yeah i'm not doing this so she started going to night school and working so my mom was

00:12:00.880 gone no my mother okay night school and working she's gone all day and i'm raised by for that

00:12:06.680 period of my life by my grandma who's a clairvoyant who's a clairvoyant who put her own son named

00:12:12.800 david up for adoption before my mom or my aunt was ever born and so nobody ever knew him this story

00:12:19.760 creepy bro it's weird yeah where is the dad where is the uncle uncle dad david oh i don't know

00:12:26.880 that's nobody ever saw him again uh no and that's actually one of the reasons i did 20 uh ancestry

00:12:33.500 i had this dream once where where my mom grabs me and she tells me to never forget where my name

00:12:38.660 came from and it was like one of these dreams that i never forgot so i am i i attributed so

00:12:45.200 much meaning to that dream that i assumed like i gotta find this dude i don't know that's the

00:12:50.760 only thing that made sense to me because you sent your blood in to figure out now they just have a

00:12:54.560 clone of me in a basement somewhere that they're beating and molesting and yeah

00:12:58.040 scratch that from the edit that out so um anywho yeah i'm named after this guy grandma has a big

00:13:08.000 hole in her heart she's very eager to be um you ever see that like that's kind of a common thing

00:13:12.620 And I think this is also common in Spanish households where a girl will have a kid really young and then the mom will raise it.

00:13:18.800 Yeah, we have that in our family.

00:13:20.700 Jess's family, same thing.

00:13:22.960 Jess's brother had twins, actually, when they were young.

00:13:27.460 I think he would have been 18.

00:13:29.400 OK.

00:13:29.780 And so, yeah.

00:13:31.060 And then the other adults, the actual adults will raise the kid.

00:13:34.600 And then everybody kind of does, too.

00:13:36.100 The other kids, like Jess always says that, too.

00:13:37.660 she's like 10 and then there was babies in the house and you know her older sister's like uh 11

00:13:42.920 or 12 or whatever and now everybody's involved in raising these kids but the grandma is really 0.99

00:13:47.680 the mom yeah that's basically you know what was going on except it was just all women there was

00:13:52.760 no men in the house i have a very faint memory of my grandpa one time on his knee he's singing

00:13:56.840 the abcs you know but he passed away shortly after that so i was not even my grandpa that's

00:14:02.580 my great grandpa my mom's dad bounced when she was a kid so that grandpa i have no idea the 0.79

00:14:08.500 clairvoyant so that lady's all fucked up right yeah she her husband bounces on her very early 0.88

00:14:13.940 she's left to raise these kids she's already had uh to put one of her kids up for adoption do you 1.00

00:14:19.260 know how she fell into the clairvoyant thing like she was a lifelong alien abductee victim

00:14:24.400 so from childhood she was expressing stories you know and and uh telling the adults around her

00:14:32.420 that horrifying things were happening they didn't know it's not that they didn't believe it

00:14:37.060 from my understanding they just didn't there's what the fuck do we do you know and so later on

00:14:41.660 in life once i got a hold of some of those stories the testimony from her i recognized what it was

00:14:47.980 because i had read some books on it and i was familiar with the phenomenon enough she was

00:14:52.620 trying to explain alien abduction to people who didn't have a grid for she was saying alien

00:14:57.060 abduction they just were like what what's she talking about i don't even know that they they

00:15:01.000 were confused it's just like when a kid comes to you you go like okay maybe you pray with them i

00:15:04.420 don't even know if they did that i mean it seems that my family was like catholic to some extent

00:15:08.780 but like by the time i come around there's no serious practitioners or like you know real people

00:15:13.140 of faith um but she's saying you know that she would be laying in bed at night and she would

00:15:20.280 either be visited by a bright white light that would appear in her window or she would be uh

00:15:25.560 visited by you know little shadow people or a white owl in her window and um and then she would

00:15:32.180 scream when she could finally muster up because it seemed like she was in some type of paralysis

00:15:35.860 or whatever and you know her mother would come running in the room and as soon as she would

00:15:41.640 touch the door that light or those shadows or that owl would vanish you know so over and over

00:15:47.620 again nothing's there how old were you when you knew that about your grandma that was a weird

00:15:52.580 era of my life that was like um you could call it like a saga i was 15 to 16 years old when i

00:15:59.860 started to put a bunch of weird pieces together and discover that um my family was almost

00:16:07.780 i guess for lack of a better term plagued by something that hit others harder and some of

00:16:16.020 them wouldn't even like really look at it they just go like oh strange happenings you know keep

00:16:19.760 movement only this is a generational thing and um how did it happen though for you did your grandma

00:16:25.520 sit down and say listen man i used to have this owl come visit or did your mom tell you about

00:16:29.280 your grandma so grandma betty that's who we're talking about with the owl she dies by the time

00:16:35.460 i'm sick so 1996 she passes away so she's not telling me anything at all uh because she's dead

00:16:41.000 and that was a weird time for me because you know i had lost my dad and then my mom became very

00:16:49.820 absent and then this lady that was supposed to be my mom just died and then all that like shortly

00:16:55.100 after that i'm whisked off to like a new family like people i've never met before and that's six

00:16:58.820 six yeah so um then then i've got it's basically my mom is dating a guy who she will date for the

00:17:07.140 next eight years and his house and family become my house and family overnight i just move there

00:17:13.380 that go then she goes hey we're gonna you're going to sleep over somebody's house and then

00:17:18.120 i never go back home no way that's it i just never go back home that's kind of cool though 0.97

00:17:22.020 and no it sucked ass because i had the dopest action figures i had street sharks i had spider 0.91

00:17:26.240 man action figures i had all the cool at the old house yeah we just left i was told we're gonna go 0.99

00:17:31.720 spend the night at my friend's house that's what my mom said and then i would wake up day after day

00:17:37.320 after day wanting to go back home to see you know my great grandma my aunt always wait and the mom

00:17:41.720 was like well i don't know if this is gonna work out with this dude or not so i'll just tell them

00:17:44.520 that it's like a temporary thing i have no idea so who's who tells you that hey grandma betty was

00:17:49.400 getting visited by like 15 years old i go and visit my aunt margaret and margaret is like

00:17:54.360 a actual angel like this woman is your actual mom's sister or no grandma's sister so my great

00:18:00.280 on okay got it she is to this day the most like caring and charitable person that i know she's

00:18:06.940 grandma betty's sister grandma betty's not a clairvoyant aunt margaret not a clairvoyant

00:18:11.040 not getting visited by aliens super based i don't think she's getting visited by aliens if she is

00:18:15.040 she's smart enough to not really share it with kids because that's a crazy thing to do um and

00:18:20.020 i guess what ends up happening is i so i'm with my cousin from florida we are at aunt margaret's 0.98

00:18:28.040 house in new jersey and like kids do we make a ouija board it's a shit ass one it's not like an 0.91

00:18:34.960 actual what's your cousin's name katherine so me and katherine are we make a ouija board and we 0.96

00:18:40.340 don't really ever even get to the point of interacting what do you mean make a ouija board

00:18:43.440 they don't you don't just buy them uh so there was a shelf or um you're like a tall dresser with

00:18:49.060 drawers but it was a shitty one and it was press board mostly so we managed to get like the backs

00:18:55.780 of one of the drawers out you've got a press board rectangle now and we just took some sharpie and

00:19:00.340 we're drawing out a ouija board so you're just naturally prone to the occult like you're just

00:19:05.300 naturally like drawn you're just like hey we got nothing else to do let's just make a ouija board

00:19:09.300 i i guess so i don't know i i mean that sounds yeah maybe maybe it seems like i'm saying like

00:19:15.380 your cousin you're like want to go play baseball no let's go to find the ice cream truck no let's

00:19:18.740 go to the arcade no let's make a ouija board man start doing a cold stuff well uh yeah i guess so

00:19:24.340 You're just kind of like that was just kind of the route that like you're saying that you kind of inherited this generational thing through your family.

00:19:30.420 Maybe. I don't want to put too much weight on that.

00:19:32.300 I imagine a lot of kids have screwed around with the Ouija board.

00:19:34.920 True.

00:19:35.540 You know, I don't think that's such an uncommon thing.

00:19:37.460 True. I think my homies did when I was a little kid and I just wasn't there that day.

00:19:40.360 I think I remember about that.

00:19:41.700 I mean, almost everybody has a story about like an almost time with people, you know, and this was like that.

00:19:47.380 So we were drawing it out.

00:19:48.240 My aunt, Margaret, she looks over and she sees us and she's talking about this thing with us.

00:19:54.240 And this is a little bit foggy.

00:19:56.580 I don't know the series of events that led to the story.

00:19:59.060 I know that we got a little piece of information where my mom's sister had always been a little bit weird.

00:20:07.120 But after an obsessive stretch with a Ouija board, she went full-blown schizophrenic and has never recovered.

00:20:14.780 Your mom's sister?

00:20:15.760 My mom's sister.

00:20:17.000 So this is like the generational iniquity thing that I'm talking about.

00:20:19.520 She was on the scene, though, too, because the mom's sister lived in that house from 3 to 6 also?

00:20:24.240 Yeah. 1.00

00:20:24.780 And she happened to be a chick that screwed around on the Ouija board and just never came back. 1.00

00:20:28.360 Yeah, she almost killed me when I was a little kid there. 1.00

00:20:31.120 Well, I mean, who knows?

00:20:32.120 You say that, right?

00:20:33.000 I mean, we don't know how.

00:20:34.080 Well, that's a weird thing, not to go off topic, but I got buddies.

00:20:37.040 I think maybe a lot of people do that took acid and didn't come back or took mushrooms and didn't come back.

00:20:43.200 It's like some people do the thing and then they don't come back.

00:20:46.920 I mean, from from my point of view, it looks now like you just kick open a doorway, you know, and you've given access.

00:20:53.720 Yeah. My dad told me that, too. When I first was in rehab in I mean, it was way later that he told me when I was already a grown up.

00:21:00.900 He's like, yeah, dude, like we freaked out when we knew you're into acid and stuff because I had buddies in the 70s that were doing acid that never came back.

00:21:08.620 Yeah. So she, you know, Aunt Margaret ends up telling us enough information. And what came out was this story about my grandmother, Grandma Betty, the clairvoyant who passed away when I was six, had a lot of experiences that she didn't know what to do with.

00:21:30.980 because it's basically like oh i see the kids are doing something spooky she's sharing spooky

00:21:34.240 family stories with us and she says uh there was a book that she read once upon a time that rattled

00:21:42.260 her so much that she actually asked your mother my mother her daughter not to read it don't ever

00:21:48.380 read this book whatever she read in this book had disturbed her so much that she she didn't want to

00:21:53.700 deal with it she wanted like no mention of it she didn't want her daughter to read it she want

00:21:57.980 anybody know what the hell is going on and so i after that left and there's some weird

00:22:06.200 occurrences that week because i my schizophrenic aunt is there that week at at aunt margaret's 0.92

00:22:12.520 house and she's on her meds and i do get to talk to her and she says some of the weirdest shit

00:22:17.260 ever about smelling the devil before he appears and he smells like sulfur and and rotting flesh 0.96

00:22:23.460 and when she smells that smell she knows it's him she turns around she'll see him sometimes

00:22:27.640 he'll be you know what okay which aunt is this this is the schizophrenic aunt aunt lisa okay okay

00:22:33.740 because we're talking about a lot of people now there's so many crazy women okay i'm trying to

00:22:37.620 keep track but so it's aunt lisa aunt lisa is mom's sis my mom's sister okay the daughter of

00:22:42.680 the clairvoyant okay technically aunt margaret is her aunt too right because aunt margaret is great

00:22:48.500 aunt okay so aunt lisa being one generation lower and aunt lisa yeah she's she's full-blown 0.65

00:22:54.780 schizophrenic i think it's you know these things had access to her because of generational iniquity 0.99

00:22:59.760 and when she used the ouija board she really kicked that shit wide open that week was a big 0.98

00:23:03.120 week it's a weird week yeah during that week you're spending time with aunt lisa who did the 0.97

00:23:06.900 ouija board never came back she's talking about smelling the devil before he shows up so i know

00:23:12.060 aunt lisa's crazy by this point everybody's well aware and aunt margaret's taking care of her

00:23:17.320 aunt lisa's on her meds so she's doing pretty well she's helping clean and cook things are

00:23:21.740 going pretty pretty cool for her and um i'm on the porch with her it's an enclosed porch

00:23:26.620 and it's nighttime in the mountains kind of the border of like you know upstate new york

00:23:33.480 and new jersey so when it's dark it's dark you see all the stars it's pitch black there's no 0.99

00:23:37.940 street lamps and she's on this porch with me the fucking lights are off and she's smoking a cigarette 0.99

00:23:42.080 so i can smell him before he shows up and her fucking cigarette chair i can remember it her 0.99

00:23:48.700 cigarette cherry is bright red in the darkness of the porch and i'm just sitting there 15 years old 1.00

00:23:53.260 listening to this woman who like you know she's a weird character man she used to use leave 0.99

00:23:59.340 messages on my house phone and and you i'd go downstairs in the morning and i'd press play on 0.94

00:24:04.000 the house phone answer machine and she'd be like david where are you and then she'd go quiet and 1.00

00:24:11.020 she would go this she would she would do this shit it was so crazy my mom would get so upset dude 0.99

00:24:14.260 because it's her sister she loves her sister but like you know you can't she go he's dead isn't he 1.00

00:24:19.100 you fucking killed him you know yeah dude and i'm just sitting there she's crazy she's no wonder you 0.99

00:24:25.160 guys get touchy when i pick up the phone and don't say anything no you don't like those silences i 1.00

00:24:29.840 tell you what though my mom used to do this thing to me where when aunt lisa would show up because

00:24:34.240 she would have her episode she would dip for a long time and then she'd come back and she would

00:24:38.060 bang on the door my mom would take me in the closet and cover my mouth so i was a little kid

00:24:43.680 somebody's banging on the door she just didn't want to have an access to you she's like i don't 1.00

00:24:47.340 it wasn't just to me it was just like she couldn't handle her sister you know her sister would show 0.95

00:24:51.740 up to her job because you know years later even though we would have moved a half an hour away 0.84

00:24:56.300 my mom still kept the same job since i was a child and at least i knew where that was and it 1.00

00:25:01.620 was in elizabeth elizabeth is a bit of a shithole it is like a slum it's a hood and and lisa would 0.78

00:25:06.720 just be cracked out walking through the streets of elizabeth and every once in a while she'd find 0.81

00:25:11.880 herself in those neck of the woods and just show up in my mom's job and then everybody including 0.99

00:25:17.200 my mom would have to deal with so her co-workers would have to deal with it at least by the way 1.00

00:25:22.020 at least that's not like a bar your mom your mom worked at a no my mom worked at a business 1.00

00:25:25.300 furniture company oh she'd show up at like a normal place a normal fucking place of business 1.00

00:25:29.720 yes it was grandma betty her mother who worked at the bar okay got it so my mom was in that bar 0.90

00:25:34.880 doing cocaine at like 13 uh-huh that's like the stories that she's told me um so anywho yeah i

00:25:41.320 i get that information about that book but she doesn't know the name of the book but she said

00:25:46.440 my mom was told not to read it so i get back home and i say hey mom you know is it true that i called

00:25:53.480 i called her mom like you know grandma betty i called her mom they they all told me to call her

00:25:59.000 mom uh so i called her mom my whole life so i was like hey mom is it true that mom it was always a

00:26:05.400 weird conversation as i got older i realized that was strange tattoos when you were 15.

00:26:10.600 um i had a couple of tattoos when i was maybe 15 16 yeah and um what were the what was like 0.89

00:26:16.440 the first tattoo was it an arm tattoo fucking douchebag nautical star on my shoulder and then 0.69

00:26:21.880 um and then a trinity on my hand uh which is that one i pick and poke that when i was homeless so 0.93

00:26:28.600 bro at 15 you got the hand tattoo or 16 came in like 16 yeah tail end of 16 beginning of 17.

00:26:34.120 So you were already saying, like, yeah, F the whole thing, man.

00:26:36.660 I don't plan on being – because back then it wasn't cool to have, like, visible tattoos.

00:26:40.840 Yeah, I was cautioned against it.

00:26:44.060 Yeah, like back then if you went to go, you know, try to get hired for a job and they saw a tattoo that was visual, like, that would matter.

00:26:51.100 It's strange, though, because I've never had –

00:26:53.300 To look for a job?

00:26:54.180 No, if there's one thing I've had success at, it's getting jobs.

00:26:57.720 Like, I had this ability to talk my way into the door of pretty much any place.

00:27:00.980 I can imagine that.

00:27:01.640 I've had 23, 24, 25 jobs, something like that.

00:27:05.020 How do you think he got here?

00:27:05.600 I don't know.

00:27:06.340 Yeah, I don't know if that's good or bad.

00:27:08.880 But wait, wait, wait.

00:27:09.720 Who tells you that the alien abduction is happening?

00:27:12.780 So I go back to my mom and I say, hey, Aunt Margaret told me about a book grandma told you not to read.

00:27:19.300 Do you remember the name of the book?

00:27:20.200 She's like, oh, yeah, it's Communion by Whitley Stryver.

00:27:21.980 Just gave it up like that.

00:27:23.560 And I go, oh, fantastic.

00:27:25.000 Oh, there you go.

00:27:25.920 So I actually just find this and steal it from the local Barnes & Nobles.

00:27:31.260 Brilliant.

00:27:31.640 and um why pay for something you could steal for sure absolutely well i mean you remember i was

00:27:36.500 like 15 or 16 like it's not like i had i did work at the time i had a job as a kirby vacuum cleaner

00:27:43.260 repair guy stop yeah no no i was believing everything up until those things those things

00:27:47.980 are actually fucking great yeah but they're mechanical so it's like you can actually fix

00:27:52.340 them it's not like computer not only can you fix them you can take them because they're made of 0.99

00:27:55.260 metal i heard they suck no they do suck they suck hard dude and you can take them to uh 0.96

00:28:01.200 you good the buffing wheel you know like the wax buffing wheel yeah and you can buff those 1.00

00:28:06.060 bitches until they look like the day they came off the production line yeah i became obsessed 1.00

00:28:10.600 with it i was like this is a beautiful vacuum anywho so i had some money but i was gonna 0.98

00:28:13.680 steal the book anyway so i i read that whole book i crammed it um actually i wasn't working at a

00:28:19.100 as a kirby vacuum repair guy at the time i was working as a uh licensed security guard for a

00:28:26.720 company called Sora a security guard yeah and I was a somebody was trusting you to yeah I was 0.99

00:28:32.720 like a 16 year old security guard for Aldi's in fucking Roselle and Roselle was a shithole in 0.95

00:28:38.880 Aldi's before it was ever like what do you mean security guard like at the front door or like the 0.99

00:28:43.020 warehouse it turns out that black people um had this thing where they loved alcohol malt liquor 0.71

00:28:48.820 and they would do this thing where they'd stand outside the Aldi's and they'd say excuse me can 0.98

00:28:53.680 i helped you put your groceries from your cart into your uh trunk and then in exchange they would

00:29:01.060 then take the cart bring it back put the thing in and take the quarter out quarter so they keep

00:29:05.240 doing that at the time that's kind of a brilliant what's a 40 ounce better than yeah did they have

00:29:09.720 40s in new jersey yeah i know some states didn't have 40s it was like they got 32 so what what was

00:29:14.820 a 40 in 2006 or 2005 $1.89 right so you'd for old english do a couple of carts get a 40 no maybe

00:29:23.080 they were 239 late 90s for the 40 old english whatever it was it wasn't that hard like this

00:29:27.500 is something they could achieve you know so they were doing this and they were doing this in mass

00:29:31.100 and a lot of them were you know scary yeah five bucks you're getting old english and some dirt

00:29:34.520 weed and you're like good you're having a good time yeah so um in my downtime because you're

00:29:39.580 not supposed to stand out there the whole time you just parked in the car and you're watching

00:29:42.840 to make sure the crackheads aren't doing it and i'm just plowing through this book

00:29:45.600 and what becomes very obvious to me is people are stealing stuff you're just plowing through the

00:29:51.180 book i mean they weren't stealing maybe they were stealing stuff i don't know i would it wasn't like

00:29:55.720 that there's a lot of things you're not supposed to do as a security guard like you're just there 0.99

00:30:00.120 to dissuade as soon as it gets real you go fuck you dude and you like call the cops like i got 0.99

00:30:04.340 nothing to do with this so you're reading the book and i'm what i'm finding is that the experiences 1.00

00:30:10.400 my grandmother had that she is now seeing in this book that are freaking her out to the extent that

00:30:17.360 she's telling her daughter not to read it is abduction she's being abducted as a child

00:30:22.440 throughout her adult life the thing that also happens this is where i said it kind of became

00:30:27.360 like a saga for me right is i then realize her stories are the same stories that my

00:30:35.480 new grandma remember my mom dated a guy and i lived in that house for eight years well i was

00:30:42.540 blessed enough to have this woman in my life, Barbara,

00:30:45.180 who wasn't my

00:30:46.300 blood relative, but raised me.

00:30:48.560 Was the boyfriend's mom? Was the boyfriend's

00:30:50.800 mom, yeah. She had alien abduction stories?

00:30:53.040 It was... Dude, she used to tell 0.99

00:30:54.700 me Hat Man shit before Hat Man was ever a thing 0.99

00:30:56.800 that I was aware of. Bro, what? So you're just like 0.99

00:30:58.460 saturated in... So is that just a hot

00:31:00.640 spot that Elizabeth New Jersey is

00:31:02.640 just like... I would say, yeah, that has probably

00:31:04.580 a lot to do with it. Because there's somewhere...

00:31:06.580 I'm reading the Shane Cashman book. I don't know

00:31:08.660 which one it is. I can't remember off the top of my head,

00:31:10.720 but he's right now. Inverted world? Yeah, he's

00:31:12.520 writing about something that like the town he's from yeah new york is like a hot spot sure i mean

00:31:17.320 that's old america you know what i mean like original 13 colonies like like i said that's

00:31:22.600 so there's just certain spots there's just certain spots on the earth that are just like if you live

00:31:27.320 there there's a more highly likelihood that you've been around aliens i would say yeah and then aliens

00:31:34.200 in the occult go hand in hand is that just kind of a thing one in one yeah yeah they're like people

00:31:38.360 who get into aliens get into clairvoyance and you know i guess so i guess so i mean you know

00:31:44.520 we do the show and and and i'm at this point where aliens is just the mask it's wearing lately

00:31:50.040 um and by lately i mean in the grand scheme of things we've been here dealing with this phenomenon

00:31:54.200 since jump but in the last hundred years it's been presenting as you know this et phenomenon

00:32:00.920 um but yeah so so uh barbara who you know for all intents and purposes is my grandmother 0.74

00:32:09.240 she's raising me for the next eight years of my life um you know is is kind of crazy because 1.00

00:32:15.480 she's just telling me these fucking stories dude she's i i had to be seven years old and she's 0.95

00:32:21.000 telling me about the times throughout her life where she would wake up she'd be unable to move 0.99

00:32:25.640 and there would be a man with a hat standing in the corner of her room staring at her and that 0.99

00:32:30.840 grandma the boyfriend's barbara that's barbara mom barbara's the shit yeah she's the boyfriend's 0.99

00:32:36.280 mom there's an apartment upstairs apartment downstairs we're still we still got to get to 0.99

00:32:40.360 where you get told that the other grandma was getting alien abducted well so that's what i'm

00:32:46.760 piecing together and this okay i'm reading this book and i'm seeing this but all of the stories

00:32:51.160 in the book so i didn't know my grandma she died when i was six years old so it's not like she

00:32:55.400 shared these stories with me i'm reading these stories and they're all barbara's stories uh-huh

00:33:00.760 so barbara's having the same experiences that my biological grandmother was having but how did you

00:33:05.960 know your biological grandma was having those because um i had gotten enough from aunt margaret

00:33:11.480 on the mountain when we were there and we were doing the ouija board thing and she's telling

00:33:14.520 me some of the okay that was when it really got dropped she started to tell you some weird stuff

00:33:18.600 she didn't just spell it out like it was the palladians but she told you enough yeah that

00:33:22.840 That by the time you get that book, which you are capable of reading.

00:33:26.280 Yeah.

00:33:26.740 Top.

00:33:28.180 You know how he's like, oh, I can't read.

00:33:29.820 Like when you talk about the Bible and stuff, he's like, oh, I just can't read.

00:33:31.820 So you totally can't read.

00:33:34.140 It's the language.

00:33:35.560 It's the way.

00:33:36.200 Get an NLT.

00:33:37.000 I gave you an NLT.

00:33:37.900 It's not just that.

00:33:38.740 It's like what I will say is, and this is going to sound really offensive, but the people who wrote the Bible weren't great at telling stories.

00:33:47.520 No, you're totally wrong.

00:33:48.600 It's the greatest story ever.

00:33:49.860 Or you don't find it intriguing that you could totally read that book about alien abductions, but you can't read the Bible?

00:33:55.100 Oh, for sure.

00:33:55.520 Yeah, there's something wrong.

00:33:56.420 No, you've got to buckle down and start reading it, dude.

00:33:58.740 I'm just saying the way, because you know what it would be like, and he did a thing.

00:34:03.380 And he did a thing because of it.

00:34:05.040 Like, there's a lot of, like, repetition.

00:34:06.600 What?

00:34:07.020 I love that.

00:34:08.120 For me, I'm like, I got it the first go-round.

00:34:10.300 Now I have to read it, you know, four different ways immediately afterwards.

00:34:14.820 It's like, there's a way to tell the story.

00:34:16.280 Okay, we'll just put that on to the side.

00:34:17.780 I just want to make note of that, that you can read.

00:34:19.860 uh yeah i mean i read um what the heck's the name of that book i am legend and uh will smith well

00:34:27.440 it wasn't will smith it's actually a white dude in the in the original will smith is a white dude

00:34:31.680 i don't want to get into it so um when i'm reading this book like i said it's it's supposed to clue

00:34:39.060 me in about my my grandmother but instead i'm reading just barbara's stories yeah these are

00:34:44.700 all the same things that barbara told me so now i'm like holy shit barbara also was abducted then

00:34:51.800 that's what this means right that's that's the the jump it's like grandma betty saw herself in

00:34:59.180 these stories because because for for those of you that don't know whitley striver's communion

00:35:02.680 is an amalgamation of abductee testimony he's gotten a bunch of different testimony together

00:35:09.060 and this is almost like the transcripts from his communications with these people

00:35:13.040 so their stories matched up grandma betty's and it really freaked her out now when i'm reading it

00:35:21.140 this is just barbara's stories so now there's some weird connection between my grandmother 0.57

00:35:25.880 and this lady that's not really my grandma that's fucking weird right so so now my head's going and 0.62

00:35:32.360 i'm realizing like no there's something going on like aunt lisa's schizophrenic and by this time i 0.93

00:35:37.100 had had a handful of strange experiences and it all felt so connected this period of my life was

00:35:45.120 really strange it felt super meaningful it felt like I had scratched something the surface of

00:35:52.460 something and found a great mystery yeah and it was about my family yeah and so I became

00:35:59.240 very obsessive during that time in my research and what do you mean that like now you felt like

00:36:06.320 your life had meaning or it was more meaningful or you kind of just understood your part in this

00:36:11.140 bigger scheme it wasn't just your life by itself like you were part of something now that yeah i

00:36:16.980 mean more or less what it was was the this idea that my family was enthralled in some sort of

00:36:22.360 supernatural mystery yeah that you know my not just family like now you get into this boyfriend

00:36:28.760 family well that's weird and it's like your whole sphere almost like the truman show like it was a

00:36:33.940 truman show but it was like gonna surround you by alien crazy occult stuff it was i mean i had at

00:36:39.960 that time already been a little bit interested in some things like um the old disney movies right 0.97

00:36:45.820 where you would have like asia no like the penis on the cover of the little mermaid or sex in the 0.81

00:36:51.880 stars in um in the lion king uh they knock some some dust and some uh leaves into the air and 0.99

00:37:00.060 People are boning in the stars?

00:37:01.940 No, no, no. 0.80

00:37:02.280 For a frame, it spells out sex.

00:37:04.340 Like, everything falls into this way to do that.

00:37:06.440 Another one, one of my favorite ones, actually, was Aladdin.

00:37:13.080 In Aladdin, there's a scene where Aladdin is dressed up like a prince,

00:37:16.620 and he's shown up to Jasmine, and he's trying to put the moves on her.

00:37:21.140 And it's on her balcony at night.

00:37:22.820 and at some point her pet tiger gets in between her and aladdin and tries to intimidate aladdin

00:37:30.240 and he backs up and he says good kitty nice kitty and all of a sudden in the background there's a

00:37:35.540 disembodied voice and the disembodied voice goes all good teens take off their clothes what yeah

00:37:41.880 dude how did i miss all this man uh this must what do you mean there's a disembodied voice like

00:37:46.440 you can hear it if you watch that part you got to turn it up i mean it's got to be the original

00:37:49.500 version you know they they got rid of a lot of this stuff but when i was younger that was like

00:37:55.800 another little mystery that i had stumbled upon i think it was the early days of the internet so

00:37:59.420 it was like a mixture of internet and rumors and i was able to find it i had a buddy who lived in

00:38:03.120 a trailer park who you know had um whatever uh mostly white people in the trailer park yeah yeah

00:38:09.480 yeah except for the black baby um in the woods that's in the trailer park that's a different

00:38:13.840 different tangent we got to get to that story this this happens a couple years before i start

00:38:19.080 to put these pieces together.

00:38:20.740 So there's a lot of reasons.

00:38:22.560 What is that?

00:38:23.520 You can see it right in the middle.

00:38:24.640 You see the tower right in the middle?

00:38:26.420 And there's just a wiener right in the middle of it?

00:38:28.300 You see the wiener?

00:38:29.660 No, that can't be real.

00:38:30.880 Yeah, dude.

00:38:31.440 That's the original one.

00:38:33.840 That's the original one of what?

00:38:34.920 What was that from? 0.99

00:38:35.580 That was the Little Mermaid.

00:38:36.480 Hey, can I take a pee real quick?

00:38:37.620 I gotta pee so hard.

00:38:38.520 Yeah, go for it, man.

00:38:38.540 Yeah, Top, could you want to hang out and talk?

00:38:41.180 Not really.

00:38:44.360 All right.

00:38:45.420 Is this just going to be off of it, or?

00:38:48.340 No.

00:38:49.520 You guys ready for the Q&A?

00:38:50.960 As soon as we're done, we're going to do the Q&A.

00:38:54.260 What's up, guys?

00:38:56.400 I don't want to put his headphones in.

00:38:58.780 That might be weird.

00:38:59.280 Don't do it.

00:38:59.700 Yeah, don't do it.

00:39:00.880 What do you guys think about the interview so far?

00:39:01.920 He's got a weird-ass story, dude.

00:39:03.820 Yep.

00:39:04.300 I just feel like he'll never tell me unless it's on a podcast.

00:39:07.720 Have you never heard this story?

00:39:08.620 No, he would never sit down with me for this long to talk to me.

00:39:12.160 Like, you know that.

00:39:13.120 Yeah.

00:39:13.480 Unless it's just about, like, something for a show.

00:39:15.560 I feel like this is good.

00:39:16.380 It's like therapy.

00:39:17.020 This is great, dude.

00:39:18.180 i feel like we haven't even scratched the surface 39 minutes i figured we were at like 10. no no bro

00:39:24.180 what we're making good time no dude he's got a wild ass story and i knew there's no way he'd tell

00:39:29.460 me unless it was like on a show yeah um what a crazy person dude like he just grew up in this 0.66

00:39:34.980 crazy ass environment like the spirit realm was just like get this guy like don't let him out 0.97

00:39:39.780 don't don't let him figure out who he is you just get that feeling as you're hearing this story 0.88

00:39:43.700 You can't have that many people circling the camp trying to, like, destroy a child and be raised in that environment unless, like, the spirit realm is like, don't let him get loose.

00:39:54.880 Whatever you do. 1.00

00:39:55.500 Kill him when he's a baby. 1.00

00:39:56.640 He's being pulled, kicking, and screaming out of it. 1.00

00:39:59.080 But he can read.

00:40:00.140 Like, that was the main thing.

00:40:02.320 You know what I'm saying?

00:40:04.140 All right.

00:40:05.280 No, me and Topper were just talking about that you won't read a Bible.

00:40:09.580 Well, I also don't like reading, like, anymore.

00:40:13.380 I haven't read anything since I Am Legend.

00:40:19.800 What?

00:40:20.380 Which was...

00:40:21.360 20 years ago?

00:40:22.560 Maybe.

00:40:23.100 Yeah, 20 years ago.

00:40:23.900 You don't think your brain is going to rot from not reading?

00:40:26.380 I don't know.

00:40:27.120 Maybe.

00:40:27.340 Well, it's a different part of your brain that reads Twitter things that are just like 40 words or whatever.

00:40:32.700 It's a different part of your brain to read a book to keep reading.

00:40:37.360 Yeah.

00:40:37.900 I mean, maybe.

00:40:38.540 I don't know.

00:40:38.720 Yeah, whatever.

00:40:39.060 Back to the story.

00:40:39.620 So this period of time, like I said, it's very much.

00:40:44.160 You're very sleepy today.

00:40:45.520 I don't know.

00:40:45.920 Are you just upset that we're doing a show later without you?

00:40:50.220 No.

00:40:51.120 Okay.

00:40:52.440 Sorry, go ahead.

00:40:53.160 No, that's fine.

00:40:53.580 So this time in my life is really weird because it does feel like I'm living a mystery, which is very exciting.

00:41:01.440 That you're just kind of like scratching the surface.

00:41:03.620 You like find a hidden book.

00:41:04.920 You open the book.

00:41:06.220 You're like, what?

00:41:06.780 The story gets even better from my perspective because what happens next is I now have access to the internet.

00:41:13.200 We're talking 2005, 2006.

00:41:15.840 The internet at the time is the wild, wild west, the best time in my opinion for conspiracy theories.

00:41:21.320 Some of the research and the content that was out there was so fantastic and there was no real censorship going on.

00:41:27.780 And the way in which you discover this information was so organic.

00:41:33.360 There was no algorithm at the time pushing you towards this or that.

00:41:36.420 it was just your ability to connect dots and then google the next thing and so of course if i'm going

00:41:43.440 to start looking up sleep paralysis shadow people hat man i'm a very small jump from that to the

00:41:52.240 concept of demons and demonology and the occult it's all right there so now this thing i go to

00:42:01.460 seek answers on what is this phenomenon and it's leading me to demons in the occult which is like

00:42:08.400 its own unbelievable tree you're assuming it's aliens right but then as you're googling it

00:42:14.860 you're saying there are these things happening well i'm not fully assuming it's aliens because

00:42:19.120 i don't know how that really deals with the dude with a hat right right you're assuming it's ghost

00:42:23.540 i don't know what i'm assuming i have no idea i'm i've not really just typing in what's happening

00:42:27.680 when people see a guy with a hat.

00:42:29.540 Well, it turns out that Hat Man is, at the time,

00:42:32.900 something that is a large enough phenomenon

00:42:35.300 that if you type in that phrase, you're going to find people.

00:42:37.460 In 05?

00:42:38.140 Which was crazy.

00:42:39.440 To find that people all over the world

00:42:42.020 were having an interaction with a dude in a duster coat 1.00

00:42:45.060 and a fucking brimmed hat. 0.99

00:42:46.440 Yeah, that's sketch of stories. 1.00

00:42:47.200 I mean, people right now, when you hear Hat Man,

00:42:49.400 it's, you know, pardon the pun, old hat.

00:42:52.460 It's nothing but...

00:42:54.260 I don't know anything.

00:42:55.020 I've never even heard of Hat Man until I talked to you guys,

00:42:56.880 but it already sounds terrifying it's just kind of like it's a doc holiday vibes but it's a ghost

00:43:01.720 it's like sure yeah i don't mess with that black silhouette sometimes red eyes black but always

00:43:06.960 definitively wearing a duster and that kind of a hat yeah that's i mean you know a lot of things

00:43:14.560 i take for granted nowadays and nothing really moves me but to put myself back into the shoes

00:43:19.420 of being uh there you go yeah yep yep that's it i mean a hundred percent uh the one with the red

00:43:26.060 eyes so freddy krueger is based on that that's like freddy krueger yeah wes craven um had a

00:43:31.300 childhood friend who had night terrors and would tell him about this character and so

00:43:35.520 wes craven having secondhand information created this nightmare guy with a hat and that's how you

00:43:40.160 get freddy krueger and um so yeah man i mean just just to think about what an insane think about me

00:43:47.140 being 15 years old and trying desperately to connect dots and all of a sudden i type in

00:43:51.020 the hat man and i find thousands of testimony on this guy like it was like so you're like okay so

00:43:57.640 for one by the way because you don't know it gets a little bit crazier at that time i had one of my

00:44:02.720 yearly visits with my dad and i i'm asking everybody and i go have you ever seen like a 0.76

00:44:08.300 dude with a hat and a duster coat he goes fuck yeah see him all the time the dad said that now 0.89

00:44:12.740 my dad said that yeah bro this story's getting weird okay so now you're you're because you don't 0.99

00:44:18.200 know what you're gonna find as you go down this path but you're like okay like my family's not

00:44:22.160 the only ones like they may be crazy but they're not just straight so crazy that they're making

00:44:26.540 something up this is something that other people have been through i've never thought they were

00:44:29.720 crazy and you that didn't cross your mind no because my family was saying that i'd be like

00:44:35.040 yeah these people are crazy by that time i had seen a like an alien in the woods i had heard

00:44:39.820 this is just normal i'm not normal but like yeah like for me i'm like oh my family likes baseball

00:44:44.940 and basketball you're like yeah man aliens and the dust hat guy man like yeah this is cool this

00:44:49.120 is normal i think when you're so close up to it you don't you don't see it as not normal correct

00:44:53.860 when you're going through when things are happening to you you don't have a i don't have any other

00:44:57.860 perspective you know to look what do you mean you didn't have like a tv where they're like the world

00:45:02.680 series was on you're like huh i bet these guys are talking about like barbara loved football i mean

00:45:07.440 baseball that was a house of baseball that was a house of the yankees the yankees yeah it was you

00:45:12.440 know once the yes network came out it was fucking crazy barbara was like oh my god she was on the

00:45:16.920 scene she loved jeter but i never ever ever ever got into sports it was weird it was like no matter 0.72

00:45:24.420 what they did they tried to put me in it they tried to share it with me they tried to and i

00:45:27.980 was like dude as at six years old i was like it's not my family what age did you learn how to do a

00:45:32.340 flip uh because that's pretty athletic for a dude that doesn't play sports too old what do you mean

00:45:38.120 too old like i was like maybe 17 or 18 when i finally learned no that's not too old bro like

00:45:44.320 did you just start it on a trampoline too old that's way too old yeah what you don't just be a

00:45:48.700 17 18 year old no i think that's awesome around no i remember like during the courting phase when

00:45:53.420 you were trying to like look really cool to me and stuff in the beginning and you were sending

00:45:56.300 me videos of how you could flip i was like i gotta do a great i do an annual flip uh it's kind of

00:46:01.020 like groundhog you know when they do one yeah when the groundhog sees the sun yeah and it goes back

00:46:06.400 in there's gonna be how many more weeks of winter it's very similar i don't know pucks a tawny

00:46:09.280 phil if i nail it then summer's coming if i don't then we got like six more weeks of winter you know

00:46:14.720 what i mean like that kind of smart so um yeah i mean it's the beginning for me of this you know

00:46:21.320 what what ends up in your yeah i mean you're doing what you were like you hate to say it like this

00:46:27.060 but like born to do like you were born into this well i think you lived it the whole time like

00:46:31.060 there's probably a lot of i don't know enough about it but i'm guessing if this is like the

00:46:34.340 popular thing today there's like a lot of johnny come lately's that just start to find out about

00:46:38.180 some stuff the hat man or the boogie monster like whatever boogie monster and then all of a sudden

00:46:43.820 they're like doing a podcast about like aliens and you're like no dude i've been living this i

00:46:47.860 think what i found is that most people are are in the space are like me they've they've otherwise

00:46:52.700 they wouldn't be in the space correct yeah there's you think you think even like people who are big

00:46:56.040 names in the space like they've been they've been around the alien abductions i think things have

00:46:59.760 happen to people. And, and, um, I used to think that you either choose to ignore it

00:47:05.620 and move on with your life or you become fascinated with it. I'm not so sure anybody

00:47:10.660 chooses to ignore it. I think, um, you know, the only thing that happens is, are you making

00:47:15.600 actionable moves towards, towards what? I mean, what do you mean? So they don't choose to ignore

00:47:20.740 it. They just, they, they can't ignore it, but they just don't like do anything about it or

00:47:26.020 sure but i think if you if you sat them down and had a conversation with them like it would all

00:47:30.820 come out and they would reveal themselves to be almost again over and over again people reveal

00:47:35.600 themselves to be almost exactly like me and and what i mean by that is terrifying we've all had

00:47:40.860 the not all of us but the people who are doing this have this in common i'm not unique uh i'm

00:47:45.960 just maybe one of the louder ones that's about it uh but you know we talked to a guy just the other

00:47:52.220 day frank uh graffio graffio anthony graffio he's from new jersey he had a weird ass childhood

00:48:00.800 full of experiences he gravitated towards the new age in a cult he had an experience with a you know

00:48:06.760 an entity uh he eventually came to christ he is a podcaster he went to mma too like it's the

00:48:12.480 fucking same dude there's a carbon copy yeah i'm not unique this is just uh i think kind of our 0.51

00:48:17.580 season you know right right this has never been in the news before been out there you had to really 0.98

00:48:23.400 seek it out before yeah i guess so you had to seek it out but no i i bet if i started talking

00:48:28.040 to like normal people i don't really see many normal people anymore we're not really in like

00:48:31.700 a friend group or anything or where we like hang out with normal people in any way but i'll bet if

00:48:36.520 i ask them they this isn't on most people's radar still right it's just it's on our radar because

00:48:41.220 it's what we do i almost want i would say more people than not have had an unexplainable

00:48:47.040 experience at some point in their life and um i think some people the more people you talk to

00:48:53.500 it's your experience that they've had an unexplainable thing because i wouldn't say

00:48:56.460 that i don't i don't know i would not say that it's 51 of people i meet have had an unexplainable

00:49:02.260 experience but maybe i haven't dug enough well you're you're not asking those questions right

00:49:06.320 you're asking about you know food forest whatever you know you're just you're just not like that's

00:49:11.420 where my mind is geared you think if you dig in with somebody more than half are going to be like

00:49:15.840 yo this thing happened when i was camping one time well more than half because we live a

00:49:20.480 supernatural experience right this is spiritual warfare we're in it all the time yeah i don't

00:49:24.700 think you get to breeze i really don't i think the percentage of people that move through this

00:49:30.400 life and don't have an experience are so small i don't know if they really even exist i think you 0.99

00:49:35.340 might forget i don't have an unexplainable we've talked to you before and you you have shit yeah 0.93

00:49:40.040 yeah no i don't that's actually what you said like no i don't and then you've let some stuff 0.98

00:49:43.960 eke out and i've been like what the fuck are you talking about dude no i haven't but but also like 0.58

00:49:48.460 i'm 10 years older and so it was a lot weirder like that 10 year gap makes a big difference 0.77

00:49:54.220 dude like what was a lot weirder uh like i remember guys on job sites talking about

00:49:59.520 hunting and they believe in bigfoot yeah and it was very rare and i talked to people on job sites

00:50:04.880 about everything bro oh sure sure it was like you go back 10 years earlier and you know he heard

00:50:11.160 something snap he smelt this disgusting smell uh there was a it was very weird all of a sudden

00:50:17.220 like something happened in the woods like everything got silent yeah everything stopped

00:50:21.160 which doesn't happen in the woods yeah and was like yeah i believe in bigfoot and i remember

00:50:25.180 like the people sitting there this was actually when the brownwood uh movie theater was being

00:50:30.640 built okay so that's not even that long ago i get well maybe it's 15 20 years now but even back then

00:50:35.840 like the people that were sitting there while this dude was telling the story kind of like

00:50:39.960 we're side-eyeing each other like bro what's this guy talking about you know i'd be like oh yeah go

00:50:46.140 on bro no that's what i'm saying but i'm i don't come from a background of like being around people

00:50:50.480 like i was always considered like a hardcore conspiracy theorist in the house that i grew up

00:50:54.540 in right uh just because i always thought like something was not what it appeared to be right

00:50:59.360 I was totally mocked for that.

00:51:01.220 Well, that's where all this leads, right?

00:51:03.220 I mean, so you have the experiences, and then they lead to the idea of the occult.

00:51:08.440 And the jump is really easy for me.

00:51:10.400 The jump is the occult is filled with – occult just means hidden or secret or coveted, right?

00:51:18.480 But when you study secret, hidden things, there are so many symbols associated with them.

00:51:24.800 So the next big jump for me is very easy to make.

00:51:27.400 you have to understand like this is like i'm on a water slide and it's just taking me and there's

00:51:32.740 very little effort i just got to be able to you know google the next thing the symbols are just

00:51:37.540 all over hollywood in the music industry so very easy to now go into that and that's like you're

00:51:44.200 dealing with the occult and now you're looking at the symbolism i mean isaac weissap has an entire

00:51:48.680 podcast called occult symbolism in pop culture or some shit like that like it is the the fountain

00:51:57.380 that never stops flowing so that that body of research it can carry you forever because it's

00:52:04.660 it's always being produced there's always the historical aspect the now and then the future

00:52:09.560 that keeps flowing towards you of this symbolism in pop culture so that's fertile ground for a

00:52:16.340 conspiracy theorist fertile ground i'm done now i'm locked in for the rest of my life from that

00:52:22.660 moment on so i'm having these moments throughout my childhood up until about 15 where i'm kind of

00:52:28.840 being nudged in this direction and i'm finding things that are interesting but that mystery

00:52:33.020 it's almost like what we do now for for me at least is a continuation of like the mystery of

00:52:38.720 my family because like i said it was this this saga for me that seemed to connect so much

00:52:46.040 you know about my experiences my family's experiences this other people that are raising 0.97

00:52:50.620 me their experiences aliens and all this shit um and then it just snowballs and it never stops and 0.55

00:52:56.240 now i'm sitting here in this studio and i'm doing it for a living it's all one big but this is why 0.89

00:53:02.240 like uh so say uh somebody with a big name would be like you know aliens are not demonic you know

00:53:09.320 and where you'd be like dog like this is kind of my specialty and i don't care if you're a big name

00:53:13.220 or not like let's like i want to talk about this because i i know this like i've been living this

00:53:18.900 my issue lately um well i will see people say that like they're not connected or there's nothing

00:53:26.540 there and i'm like dude the overlap is like i there are times when i'll be much more abrasive 0.74

00:53:32.520 about it and i'll call somebody a retard and i'll say no it is demonic but there are other times 0.70

00:53:38.040 where like i'll look at what they're saying where there's no connection this is not demons this is 0.65

00:53:42.300 i'm like hey dude the overlap is tremendous yeah but you're also it's an area of your life that

00:53:46.980 you are humble about, like that you're not just like, oh no, I'm an OG in the game and I know

00:53:51.500 this, this, and this. I've noticed you're very humble about, hey man, this could be something

00:53:54.860 other than what I think it is. Or this person could have some kind of insight that I don't

00:53:58.880 really know yet. Like, yeah, I've been around it a lot, but I'm open to like hearing whatever

00:54:02.700 other people have to say. Well, how do you tell somebody about God?

00:54:05.920 Do you just tell them outright or do you have to like ease people into it?

00:54:09.940 Yeah. I think it's far and few in between that it ever works to just evangelize to somebody,

00:54:14.840 right to just start reading scripture to somebody no no i'm not even saying that for you trying to

00:54:18.460 like evangelize alien abductions or whatever i'm just saying like if a topic comes up you're like

00:54:22.680 i don't know i don't think it's that i've kind of seen you do that before like i don't remember

00:54:26.820 what it was but say it was hat man somebody's like yeah hat man always has red shoes you're

00:54:30.720 you know i've seen you be like well i i don't i i think i disagree with that but i'm open to hear

00:54:35.960 this person like for them to further explain the red shoe thing i mean i don't i don't consider

00:54:40.360 myself in authority on any of it because it's also intangible it's hard to say that you know

00:54:46.240 you have the this is like my issue but i can't imagine another person have a greater percent of

00:54:51.000 their life being involved in this i've heard hundreds i've listened to testimony from hundreds

00:54:57.880 and hundreds of people who make my story seem like uh super insignificant and um and i think

00:55:05.420 that may not actually be accurate i think when you listen to somebody's story like even somebody

00:55:09.780 who's listening to me now you know we'll have this conversation for however long it is and

00:55:13.860 you're getting all of the greatest hits condensed into whatever a two-hour window um it feels a lot

00:55:20.500 more normal than that my childhood felt really normal my my life feels really normal it's until

00:55:28.100 you focus in on those strange little footnotes and then you start to weave the story out of that

00:55:34.760 that and i don't know that that's not the right thing to do right because even in the bible we've

00:55:39.120 talked about it before there's so much about the the characters lives that you don't know

00:55:44.100 but what god seems to want to tell you is about these supernatural moments in their lives

00:55:49.180 and so maybe in that way it is reasonable to look at those things that happen to you and instead of

00:55:55.020 just treating them like you know uh things that are outside of the norm or things that are outside

00:56:00.840 the general comings and goings of your daily life maybe they are more significant maybe they do tell

00:56:05.420 a story that's more important so i don't know if there's anything wrong with that but um i've heard 0.87

00:56:11.280 a lot of people who make my story seem like insignificant bullshit you know because they're 0.99

00:56:16.220 getting chased by fucking bipedal dog dudes that are ripping their dogs in half and you know what 0.99

00:56:21.420 i mean like yeah that's a little much yeah i'm just saying like his story's not even significant 0.99

00:56:24.820 enough to get on the confessionals and it's it's a crazy story oh yeah yeah yeah like if i if i went

00:56:29.420 on tony merkel's show and i told my story it'd be a sleeper episode like like a sleepy episode

00:56:33.940 in comparison so dude really oh yeah man so i'm just out of the game like i'm totally out like

00:56:38.720 you're telling me this i'm like what yeah yeah so i mean i you know i'm gonna jump ahead but

00:56:44.360 yeah because we've left off 15 right 16 reading the reading the book as you're the security guard

00:56:49.960 at aldi that's kind of where we where we left off at so i mean there are things that happened during

00:56:54.660 that time there was when i was little i heard a disembodied voice um narrate what i was about to

00:57:01.800 do it was a woman's voice she was very um indifferent about it she was just saying

00:57:06.720 something was about to happen and then it happened and uh i guess i should i'll say that really quick

00:57:12.020 because that sounds crazy to whatever audience that hasn't heard it i'm just so used to telling

00:57:15.860 these stories that sometimes i breeze through but i was very little i'm there with aunt lisa i'm in

00:57:20.640 the house the old house on railway avenue in elizabeth aunt lisa uh is not diagnosed schizophrenic 0.92

00:57:26.380 at this time but she is like notably fucking crazy and she asks me to get a silverware drawer from 0.90

00:57:33.580 her for this story yeah yeah she was sick on the couch i remember we had a big brown leather couch 0.97

00:57:37.720 she was not feeling well she tells me to go get the silverware drawer i maybe am four or five at

00:57:44.780 the time maybe five because you're in the spooky house i'm in the spooky house i leave there when

00:57:50.140 i'm sick so i couldn't be any older than six but i think i was a little bit younger than that

00:57:53.520 and i go and i get the silverware drawer i pull it out it's very heavy i'm waddling down the

00:57:59.220 hallway with it all of a sudden i hear a woman's voice in my head i remember at that age knowing

00:58:04.480 like i heard her but not with my ears like as a little kid i knew that what'd she say she said

00:58:09.900 he's gonna drop it as if she was talking to somebody else which is interesting right

00:58:14.640 and um and she had a nice voice and she had this tone of just like just observation this is a

00:58:24.740 matter of fact he's gonna drop it and then all of a sudden all of a sudden yeah all of the sudden

00:58:31.760 no all of a sudden all of the sudden come on everybody's on the edge of their seat right now

00:58:35.460 my vision distorts i get uh i guess what would be what do you call it when vertigo vertigo

00:58:42.240 everything starts to corkscrew uh-huh and then i i end up just like my hands just open

00:58:50.020 and this thing hits the ground and the sound of all the clattering silverware like snaps me out

00:58:56.540 of it and then after that i'm pretty sure my aunt chokes me on the kitchen floor and i almost die

00:59:01.740 either that or she chokes her own son on the kitchen floor and and i say i'm gonna call the

00:59:07.880 Like, either I got choked or they got choked or I did get choked and I saw it from a third-person view.

00:59:14.940 Like, it's really weird.

00:59:16.040 That memory is very strange.

00:59:17.220 So you look at it like whatever that voice was was, like, trying to save you because you were taking this silverware drawer with, like, steak knives in it to your aunt who was crazy and potentially going to kill you with the knives?

00:59:29.820 No, I don't know.

00:59:30.700 Okay, well, what were you doing with the silverware drawer?

00:59:32.220 She was asking me to get it for her.

00:59:33.540 For what?

00:59:33.840 I have no idea. 1.00

00:59:34.600 To stab you, maybe. 1.00

00:59:35.620 Probably. 0.99

00:59:35.820 No, I'm saying, like, what is happening?

00:59:38.340 She just brought her a knife?

00:59:39.400 I mean, I don't know.

00:59:39.880 No, it was like the voices in her head were doing that stuff, too, man.

00:59:44.900 We're saying, like, yeah, tell him to bring the stuff here.

00:59:46.980 That way it won't be conspicuous.

00:59:49.020 Like, if you tell him to just bring you a butcher knife, it's going to be conspicuous. 0.92

00:59:51.680 But if he brings the whole drawer, and then so this voice in your head, I don't know, it's female. 0.71

00:59:55.160 Well, she is. 0.92

00:59:55.780 She's been obsessed with me dying, right?

00:59:57.940 So then this voice is like, he's going to drop it, like, in a sweet voice, and then you look at the corkscrew, and then boom.

01:00:03.580 And then she loses it because whatever entity that was like, you know, controlling her at the time is like, what?

01:00:10.020 The plant's foiled now, you know, like I don't know, like snaps her out of it.

01:00:13.580 And no, I can see that and starts choking somebody or something.

01:00:16.900 I mean, that's a I it's an interesting line of thought.

01:00:19.500 Why else are you carrying a silverware drawer?

01:00:21.540 Because my aunt's schizophrenic and the demons are telling her to tell me to get it. 0.99

01:00:24.500 I don't I don't know why I'm doing it. 0.91

01:00:25.740 And I don't know that that's what would have happened.

01:00:27.260 I don't think she was like, hey, I want to get the spoon out and let's have some ice cream.

01:00:30.400 I don't think that's what she was doing.

01:00:31.380 probably not and her sons were there with me and to this day like i don't know who got i for a long

01:00:36.820 time i remember is that gabe who's gabe gabe is uh gabe's my cousin he's from uh my dad's side not

01:00:43.060 one of them not one of them okay this is uh my cousin julian my cousin manny julian uh he was

01:00:49.540 diagnosed schizophrenic like julie julian was diagnosed schizophrenic in in the years following

01:00:55.840 shortly after his mother's diagnosis so she was diagnosed shortly after this event not because of

01:01:00.580 it just shortly after it and he was also diagnosed they got taken away from her he went to julian and

01:01:07.560 manny julian and manny manny's in the new age now and and he's a still lives in new jersey i think

01:01:13.400 so i don't know he's all you know it's not good um and julian he went away from 12 years old

01:01:20.580 to 25 doing time yeah they took him they put him in a juvenile institution yeah like see what

01:01:28.200 California we had CYA like California Youth Authority they probably had like an NJYA I guess

01:01:32.540 so and in there he kept getting in trouble and yeah dude I had buddies like that that went into

01:01:37.700 CYA as like a teenager and then got in a fight he might have been in there longer than than 25 but

01:01:43.340 either way he there the institutions are weird bro like you can get trapped in the institution

01:01:48.680 and you just can't get out well he was like a wild animal in a lot of ways he said because I had a

01:01:53.800 conversation with him not long ago for the first time like since we were children and he said uh

01:02:00.720 yeah the woman in my head tells me to run away or and so there was times where he would take his

01:02:07.160 little brother manny who was only a little bit younger than him and they would run away yeah

01:02:10.660 like they would the police would find them in the streets of elizabeth toddlers effectively toddlers

01:02:16.260 running away armed with kitchen knives because somebody's coming after them he has to run away

01:02:22.380 that was his big thing was run away run away run i mean man i've told this story a bunch of times

01:02:26.400 but there'd be times we were going to the same elementary school and i'd be looking out my 0.97

01:02:29.780 classroom window and my fucking cousin is running dude and he's climbing the fence the chain link 0.99

01:02:35.320 fence and the fucking staff is after him and he's now in the park outside of the fence and he's 0.99

01:02:39.780 zigzagging and they're trying to grab him the other way that i also trying to get away so your whole 1.00

01:02:44.500 family's just crazy people yeah yeah yeah wow uh also he would take shits in the urinal and that's 0.99

01:02:50.540 how i would know like there were times when i caught him i'd go to the bathroom like the 1.00

01:02:53.900 bathroom in school and i'd find my cousin just pinching a loaf in the fucking urinal 0.97

01:02:57.860 and then there's other times in the future where i would just see the loaf and i'd be like julian 0.99

01:03:02.300 was here so but but he's crushing now he has a little girl um he's got a good job what do you

01:03:11.480 mean at some point he got normal he got out and he's he's kind of like you know god is he just

01:03:17.000 wants a life now right and he did like 10 years institutionalized too after all that crazy stuff

01:03:22.100 and can't like got out and figured out how to like survive in the room and like outside the

01:03:26.320 institution dude props for that he like beat up and molested a nurse or something like that but

01:03:31.260 he was like well even even if you're not like doing stuff like that it's just people learn

01:03:35.040 the institutional life dude whether it's like rehab yeah or jail or like whatever they just

01:03:40.880 learn that life of living on the inside if you will like your meals are prepared for you your

01:03:45.500 health care is available for you you're told it's very hard it's very hard to have that freedom to

01:03:50.420 like get out and not just end up doing something crazy yeah yeah for sure i mean uh manny he never 0.98

01:03:57.200 went in he ended up there's a lot of crime a lot of really bad you know just immoral shit bad guy 0.98

01:04:02.980 shit um and his his way of dealing with it with it is like i know he got a a pentagram tattooed 0.99

01:04:10.120 on himself it's like a pentagram in a flame in a circle it's literally a symbol that comes from 0.99

01:04:14.700 the show supernatural and it's supposed to ward off evil but it's from a cw show but the point is 0.97

01:04:20.720 homeboy is inundated by shit he doesn't understand well anytime you're using something to ward off 0.97

01:04:26.880 evil spirits yeah it is witchcraft like that is the definition he's not denying that you know it's 1.00

01:04:32.180 just one of those things where it's like you get because i know he went in a similar path right

01:04:35.620 conspiracy and all that other shit and you don't want to look at christianity as having the answers

01:04:40.000 because it seems like how could it it's it's been sitting right there the entire time not only that 0.88

01:04:43.660 look at the people in the pews like how could those people be right how could they have uh the

01:04:48.380 answers yeah and how could they arm me against the things that i've seen the forces of darkness

01:04:52.260 have an elaborate plot dude they got they've got everybody like kept apart for all these different

01:04:57.720 ways and all these different reasons man they find a way it's it's so um man you should talk

01:05:03.540 with pastor rick i think that would be an interesting conversation uh pastor yeah yeah

01:05:08.300 like have him oh he won't go to church now dude you say matt talk to him matt yeah that'd be cool

01:05:13.080 No, we're talking about you right now, dude.

01:05:15.820 Why is he not going to church?

01:05:17.300 I'm just saying in the future.

01:05:18.300 It doesn't make any sense, dude.

01:05:19.200 I don't know.

01:05:19.680 I mean, it's just reminding me because he won't return Pastor Rick's calls.

01:05:23.060 He won't?

01:05:23.440 How did you know Pastor Rick called me?

01:05:24.700 Because he told me.

01:05:25.400 Oh, yeah.

01:05:26.340 Everybody's trying to get you back in the game, dude.

01:05:27.880 We don't like you not going to the 501c3, dude.

01:05:30.240 You should tell him next time you see him and be like, did you know David's never tithed here?

01:05:33.520 I bet you don't stop calling me.

01:05:34.260 He won't care.

01:05:35.080 No, that guy's a real one.

01:05:37.100 He won't care, dude.

01:05:38.080 He's awesome.

01:05:38.600 That's why I think you should talk to him to figure it out.

01:05:40.380 yeah i'd love to oh man imagine i'll ask him well he's no longer head i don't know what he is

01:05:45.540 doesn't matter if the interview sessions you don't have to have a title i'm saying like if

01:05:49.180 he was going to go back and change something about the church nobody's asking him to go back

01:05:52.480 and change bro i wouldn't talk to him about changing something in the church i don't know

01:05:55.840 i just want to know it's going to be what it's going to be dude i want to know if he's a real 0.98

01:05:59.280 one he is a real one that's how you find out that'd be cool yeah i would watch this shit out of that 0.96

01:06:03.560 So, okay, what age are we at now? 0.97

01:06:07.140 It's like, so I'm doing that for a couple of years.

01:06:10.640 I'm researching.

01:06:11.640 Oh, I forgot about the alien thing.

01:06:13.180 I'm going to keep it brief because you've already heard it.

01:06:15.080 No, I haven't.

01:06:15.720 I just know the one.

01:06:17.600 I had to hear about the actual abduction.

01:06:19.480 No, no, no.

01:06:19.780 We got tons of time.

01:06:20.680 I had to hear from Albarino that you were actually abducted.

01:06:23.500 You still never told me the abduction story.

01:06:25.720 Oh, yeah.

01:06:26.020 Albarino knows, dude.

01:06:27.020 That was embarrassing.

01:06:28.600 I'm like, he's telling me how bad you guys are and he's telling me your story.

01:06:31.840 I'm like, no, no.

01:06:32.340 He never got abducted.

01:06:33.140 He's like, oh, yeah, he has, man.

01:06:34.200 I'm like, no, I don't think so.

01:06:35.460 But you told me about, like, a black baby running through the woods that you ultimately figured out was a gray.

01:06:39.680 Do you want me to say the black baby story?

01:06:41.140 Yeah. 0.98

01:06:41.400 Okay, fine.

01:06:41.960 So in that same trailer park that my buddy lived where we saw the penises on the cover of The Little Mermaid because he had all the OG VHSs, we had a little wooded area.

01:06:53.340 So basically there was the town, and on the outskirts of town was a trailer park, and then right out there was, like, the woods edge.

01:07:00.540 You know, like, that was it.

01:07:01.560 That was the edge of town.

01:07:02.360 It just sounds like a movie set.

01:07:04.720 Yeah, it's very much like –

01:07:05.780 It kind of is.

01:07:06.680 I had an excellent childhood.

01:07:09.660 From the ages of 7 to 15, I had – I'm so grateful for it.

01:07:15.120 It was like a Goonies childhood where like every day was an adventure.

01:07:18.160 I rode my bike from sunup to sundown.

01:07:20.720 Like the summer actually meant something, and it was incredible.

01:07:24.440 Like we were just exploring the mysteries of our small town on a regular basis and making memories.

01:07:31.160 And sometimes when you're exploring the mysteries of your small town, you run into a gray alien.

01:07:34.560 So in this area on the outskirts of town in the woods, it was called the ramps.

01:07:40.280 And we would just – it wasn't actually us who built it.

01:07:42.580 It turned out it was actually my stepdad and his kids – I mean his friends.

01:07:45.500 Built, like, bike ramps?

01:07:46.760 Yeah, and they were still there when I was a kid.

01:07:49.760 And so we spent a lot of time there.

01:07:52.860 We'd hang out.

01:07:53.400 There was all kinds of stuff.

01:07:54.140 There was actually, like, an entire 18-wheeler –

01:07:57.900 So it's dirt trail.

01:07:58.740 It's dirt trails with ramps.

01:08:00.160 dirt trails with ramps all kinds of stuff was like that too that was like the best it was also

01:08:04.560 edged up against um a section of the trailer park where they just took old decommissioned trailers

01:08:10.360 and just abandoned them there nice so you could explore them endlessly they were filled with all

01:08:14.540 the things of the people who lived in their prior like none of it was emptied out so you could just

01:08:18.600 go we'd visit those things i'd find like pocket knives and okay it was the best so we're in there

01:08:24.500 one day and i'm sure hat man's like breeding in there dude no i don't think i don't know if he 0.74

01:08:28.720 breeds i don't know if he if he gets any it would be hanging if he has sex so we would spend time

01:08:36.780 by the creek there was a creek that ran through those woods and there was tall grass and we would

01:08:40.680 stomp down paths through that tall grass and one day i'm in there with my buddy shane uh shane o'brien

01:08:46.260 shout out to shane and we uh we're walking out of the tall grass to go meet up with our buddies who

01:08:52.100 are sitting on their bikes by the ramps and all of a sudden something starts rustling like not just

01:08:57.000 rustling like hauling ass in the tall grass towards us i grew up in a house where my mom was

01:09:03.620 we we loved the crocodile hunter as a kid all i did was watch animal planet we had so many dogs 0.99

01:09:12.480 at a time we had raccoons we had owls we had tortoises we had every fucking critter you could 0.83

01:09:17.600 imagine what do you mean as pets yeah you had a raccoon as a pet yeah they actually make really 0.96

01:09:21.780 good pets no i've heard that but i just you didn't strike me as the type i thought you would be more 0.98

01:09:25.400 concerned about the owl we had owls as pets parents all kinds of shit like man all kinds of 0.95

01:09:30.460 in your house yeah yeah well interestingly enough in the backyard of the railway house we had um 0.97

01:09:36.220 my mom called it the run or something like that but it was like giant cages they would have been

01:09:39.980 for dogs i guess big big ass the raccoons lived in those they lived in those you'd go out there

01:09:44.640 and pet them and feed them and they had babies back there and we had the baby it was really cool 0.97

01:09:49.040 so all of that to say like i know animals i know animals i don't give a shit now it's not something 0.91

01:09:54.580 that i talk about now because i was just so exhausted from the smell of animals from having 0.96

01:09:58.820 animals and just like i don't want shit i got cats now i'm good but i knew i was familiar with 0.87

01:10:04.480 whatever lived there in carteret new jersey there wasn't shit i mean towards the end of me living 0.94

01:10:08.880 there we started to get whitetail that was weird like we didn't have whitetail in the area and they

01:10:13.440 started to you know it became a real problem in the northeast actually the amount of whitetail

01:10:17.120 um and so there wasn't anything that was going to be causing that much ruckus of that size

01:10:23.820 that was pretty much not a dog so in my mind in the couple you're in the high you're in the high

01:10:30.120 grass trying to go to the homies and something's causing something's running towards me and running

01:10:33.800 towards you yeah you can see the way the grass is parting and you're just watching the grass kind

01:10:38.780 of go like this getting closer watching is like that's a stretch this happens in three seconds

01:10:43.800 yeah it's so fast yeah i think dog i grab my buddy he grabs me that's the kind of fear that

01:10:49.380 we're in we're like it's so startling as kids i'm like 11 i think we just grab each other and

01:10:56.580 this dog dog this thing bursts out in front of us now now we created a path right time of day

01:11:05.580 it's day it's daylight dog i mean just bright daylight yeah yeah middle of the day whatever

01:11:09.180 summer probably summertime maybe i don't know middle of the day it's not cold out i know that

01:11:13.660 like it's it's a nice probably spring or summer day you liked it when your friend held you tight

01:11:18.980 like that i didn't like dude we just prepared to die like i thought we were gonna get mulled by it

01:11:23.220 was that crazy of a situation it was it was and it just happened so quick the thing that it was

01:11:28.020 moving towards us so definitively that it was clear it was coming for us to do something to you

01:11:33.540 whatever this thing is is coming for us whatever so we grab each other it bursts out into the path

01:11:39.540 that we've created and then in like one stride it's out of the path and onto the other side of

01:11:44.980 the tall grass but what we saw when it came out far enough that i probably could have leaned and

01:11:49.680 touched it uh was toddler sized we're 11 this is toddler size baby herman baby baby black 0.74

01:11:58.760 black baby black baby naked black baby no or no wiener didn't see a wiener moving pretty fast 0.99

01:12:08.300 no hair naked black baby wow black but like black like like um gray like the cover of your bible 1.00

01:12:19.080 black black like that not like a like what we call like a black person today but actual black 0.99

01:12:24.680 well when you're 11 that's all you kids you go black baby oh black baby and you run out of the 0.99

01:12:32.140 out of the well and i'm sure it's like an instinct for a human it doesn't matter where you live on 0.83

01:12:36.840 the planet or what time period that you're in tall grass and something's coming at you like that

01:12:40.520 the grass is split you're like oh you know because there's people where it's like lions or bears or

01:12:44.480 whatever like there's something coming for me and it comes by does it make eye contact or is it just 0.91

01:12:49.740 like no i remember that it runs by like it didn't give a shit about us like it didn't even know you 0.94

01:12:53.560 were there uh you know knowing we were there i don't know didn't care yeah didn't care didn't 0.66

01:12:58.420 interact and it was just off in the tall grass on that side now so we run out now because where did

01:13:03.580 to go like where did you see did you see the grant you're just like let's go in that direction what's

01:13:07.880 your buddy's name is shane like shane let's go let's go no we didn't there's no conversation

01:13:12.340 we just scream and run out of there so this whole interaction from inception from the moment we see

01:13:20.340 it to the moment we react till it passes us by and we run this happened within a window of five

01:13:25.500 probably less than five seconds and we run out of there we go out screaming we run past our friends

01:13:31.760 we run through the trailer park we run all the way to the park that's nearby sort of and we

01:13:36.340 collapse in the grass because we're exhausted by that time and the story for the longest time is

01:13:40.840 just like yeah we saw a naked black baby it wasn't until I was like 16 years old wait and that's at 0.99

01:13:45.860 11 yeah so you're just hanging with the homies sometime like maybe you're playing baseball in 0.59

01:13:50.200 the street or whatever and Shane's like bro remember that black baby Shane never talked about

01:13:55.480 it he would when I would ask but he never brought it up eventually he wouldn't when I would ask

01:14:01.560 anymore and that wasn't like we were adults by that time i would check in with him periodically

01:14:05.900 i send him a dm i say hey man yeah i want to talk about that thing he was like no i don't like i

01:14:10.820 don't want to talk he ended up growing up and being normal yeah so he was like yeah dude i don't want

01:14:15.120 to have any association with like when i was so what i do know about shane is like he didn't see

01:14:21.200 what it was because when we grab each other he maybe closed his eyes and so i would ask him like

01:14:27.600 what he saw and rather than say it was a dog it was a raccoon or whatever he would say i don't

01:14:32.960 know i don't know i don't know what we saw i just know i was scared and then years later when i'd

01:14:39.020 bring it up again because i just can't let these things go he would say i don't want to talk about

01:14:42.880 it did he ever say i like the way you held me though no i don't think he ever said i like the

01:14:47.500 way that i held him we held each other it was a mutual holding okay so i didn't do it wasn't like

01:14:53.140 it was one side top is a tough crowd today dude i cannot even get him to smile i don't know what

01:14:57.680 he's doing over there no i know but he's just like not even he's really upset he's not going

01:15:03.220 on the next show that could be it i think he's just you know he's like i've heard okay so okay

01:15:07.000 so we got the 11 year old black baby thing shane doesn't ever want to talk about it again

01:15:11.260 doesn't want to talk about now we know we can kind of close out that whole thing yeah that's

01:15:15.920 that's okay what was the abduction or potential abduction okay so that's actually um brings us

01:15:20.940 right back to when i was researching and i had this notion because of course when you're looking

01:15:25.240 up sleep paralysis in the hat man people will say it's purely a psychological phenomenon your body

01:15:29.440 goes into a state of paralysis so that you don't act out your dreams which you know and everybody's

01:15:33.900 having the same dream about happening no no no but they're just saying like first and foremost

01:15:38.080 you're in a state of paralysis while you dream it's a biological function makes a lot of sense

01:15:42.220 to me actually uh secondly some people suffer from a condition where they will wake up but their body

01:15:47.340 will still be in that paralysis but since you're kind of in a pseudo sleep state you still have the

01:15:51.560 ability to hallucinate visually and so the state of paralysis causes fear because you are unable

01:15:57.580 to move and since you're still in this pseudo soups uh sleep state where you can see visual

01:16:02.880 hallucinations the fear causes the hallucinations to be menacing so that actually really makes a lot

01:16:10.280 of sense to me and i would i had some hang-ups because barbara told me a story one time about

01:16:15.540 seeing the hat man where she saw it and she shared a room with her sister when she was little and the

01:16:21.260 next morning she was talking to her sister and she goes I saw it last night and her sister goes I saw

01:16:25.040 it too and now as if that's not strange enough they were speaking in hushed tones they didn't

01:16:29.320 want their mom to hear and but she did end up overhearing at the breakfast table and she's like

01:16:33.480 what are you girls talking about when they finally tell her that they've been seeing a man with a

01:16:37.480 black hat she goes I saw him last night too she's in a different room of the house so two girls of

01:16:44.880 the same age see it in the same night and then their mother who's in a different room of the

01:16:48.800 house also sees them that night so when you tell me it's it's purely a visual hallucination that

01:16:54.140 sounded okay initially but now you're like i don't know guys so i'm just in this mode where i'm like

01:16:59.500 maybe some of it but not all of it yeah that's weird it reminds me of one time me and scotty boy

01:17:04.480 and lebowski were eating mushrooms at delval and we were looking not a real story we were looking

01:17:08.740 scotty boy lebowski yeah scotty boy and lebowski the three of us and my dog mickey when she was a

01:17:13.760 puppy got sprayed by a skunk like we just took mushrooms and like right when they kicked in a

01:17:17.480 skunk sprayed my dog we had to chase her all it was crazy but anyway we're at the top of this

01:17:21.960 mountain looking down on the lake at delval anybody from livermore will know what i'm talking

01:17:25.520 about to livermore we all three watched the same scene from baywatch like like it was like baywatch

01:17:32.520 you guys don't remember baywatch okay yeah there was super uh it was like this whole yeah there's

01:17:37.120 a lot of that we watched this whole chase scene down on the lake like it's it's probably midnight

01:17:42.480 or one in the morning we're just tripping like on the top of this mountain looking down on the lake

01:17:45.760 who's chasing who it was just this whole boat chase scene i don't know i call the bay watch

01:17:50.240 scene well the three of us all saw it like because at some point we're all watching this chase scene

01:17:54.800 of the boat and this whole thing going down on the beach and everything so do you think it actually

01:17:58.320 happened i don't know it's just that's what i'm thinking of when you're telling the story i'm

01:18:01.120 like what what exactly because i'm like because we're all watching it and at some point like all

01:18:06.240 of all three of us like look at each other like yo are you are you are you watching this are you

01:18:11.680 seeing this and you know i think i was like what watching what they're like this whole boat

01:18:16.400 chasing down i'm like yeah you guys see it too like what like we're all seeing you guys could

01:18:21.520 have bore witness to something at night that was actually much more when i was younger me and my

01:18:25.680 wife my wife we were uh on adderall and unisoms so one is keeping you awake and one is forcing

01:18:33.600 you to sleep yes used to get mad at me for doing them doing the highs and lows okay so so did you

01:18:38.160 ever have those moments where i would be able to take my phone and streak it across the night sky

01:18:41.920 and it would leave a visual tracers yeah i only had those from like acid or mushrooms or ecstasy

01:18:47.280 so i would be able to after i did it the light would stay in the sky from adderall in another

01:18:53.120 and unison so uh unisoms i think it was unisoms which one of those are both pharmaceuticals

01:18:57.520 one is to put you to sleep the other one's keeping you up that's why so you're in this like

01:19:01.600 REM state walking and and dreaming sort of and um but i was able to see it three-dimensionally i

01:19:08.180 could put my head underneath the streak of light and also my wife could too what yeah i don't

01:19:13.300 remember being like i mean i would get streakers like i was on acid and drank jägermeister the

01:19:16.940 first time i drank jägermeister you know jägermeister is is actually supposed to like

01:19:20.400 be super good for you i don't know it's not alcohol it was a medicine all i know is i thought

01:19:24.500 yeah i thought it was cough syrup like i was on acid i drank it and i was like who's who are we

01:19:28.920 drinking cough syrup like what's going on right now tastes like and then like when i gave it back

01:19:32.380 to somebody and my hand came back i had tracers and they went like that and it was straight like

01:19:36.280 i just remember that was the very first time i ever saw tracers but then it was a pretty common

01:19:40.300 occurrence with hallucinogens but i've just never heard of it with like pharmaceuticals yeah adderall

01:19:44.380 and unisoms don't do it so so um you know a lot of what i'm reading as far as like the biological

01:19:50.540 function of sleep paralysis is making a lot of sense but there's still things that like it's this

01:19:54.800 is data that i can't let go of you know in the sense that she saw it and her sister saw and her

01:20:00.480 mom saw it i can't just chalk that up to visual hallucinations we're not all having the same

01:20:05.480 hallucination at the same time but what i do think is reasonable is to say well if any aspect of this

01:20:12.140 is a psychological slash biological phenomenon then by nature of looking into it as aggressively

01:20:19.940 as i am which is to say like till five o'clock in the fucking morning by this point i'm pretty much 0.89

01:20:26.080 i'm kicked out of my house and i'm sneaking in the bedroom of my girlfriend through the window 0.96

01:20:32.200 you're kicked out of your house with the mom's boyfriend yeah i get kicked out shortly after 0.99

01:20:36.540 that so so they separate i don't see barbara fucking basically ever again no way then we 0.89

01:20:43.380 just move in with some new dude again and and then they kick me out like at what age uh i was 0.92

01:20:49.220 kicked out the tail end of 16 so we leave barbara whoa whoa whoa so you leave the you leave the

01:20:55.360 mom's boyfriend that you were living with barbara about 15 go to this other house with mom and new

01:20:59.900 boyfriend and get kicked out of that house yeah yeah so okay so we leave there about 15 uh-huh

01:21:04.720 we live in the hood during that time i get ko'd with a baseball bat and i think it really changed

01:21:09.600 a lot about me what do you mean um one-on-one fight or like no i got jumped by like i don't 0.99

01:21:14.880 know it was could have been like 10 dudes they cracked my head with a bat they beat the shit

01:21:19.000 out of me you were just walking through the hood did you start like saying something no you don't 0.99

01:21:23.240 say shit you just walk through the hood i had to go through them because they were on the avenue 0.95

01:21:26.800 that led to where i lived in the hood because we moved from one area to the really bad area of town 1.00

01:21:31.460 because my mom couldn't afford you know to live in a house on our own so we had to get a shitty

01:21:36.360 apartment in the hood and um and at that time 15 years old right like i remember that night i was

01:21:41.360 hanging out with some girl and it was later than i usually would have gotten home because i was

01:21:46.180 trying to put the moves on her and before you knew it it was like you know 10 10 30 at night

01:21:51.040 and i'm like all right i gotta start getting my mom like the the leash was off you know when this

01:21:55.540 happened when we moved my life no more rules there was no more rules that's it it was just

01:21:59.740 like chaos and so so you start walking through the hood and basically there's like a bunch of

01:22:04.820 dudes and they're all like slap boxing and and chopping it up on the corner and you know they

01:22:10.220 see me as soon as i see them now i have a decision to make if i turn and they're like oh he's gonna

01:22:16.160 give chase yeah i know it i just know enough about it i've lived there long enough i go okay they're 0.50

01:22:20.860 gonna chase me so the only shit that i could do is like i gotta move right through them so i moved 0.57

01:22:24.840 right through them i just kept walking and they were on the same sidewalk that i was so i walked 0.99

01:22:28.080 right through them and like i felt like i almost made it out they kind of like didn't give a shit 0.72

01:22:31.660 about me then all of a sudden i heard like uh yo um uh you don't say like hey what's up guys you 0.96

01:22:38.340 don't say anything you just walk 30 at night and it's 10 black dudes you don't say really anything 0.99

01:22:42.020 yeah you know so they go um what are you a bitch and they weren't talking to me they were talking 0.99

01:22:47.480 to the kid with the bat i think he's a kid because i think they were actually a little bit younger 0.98

01:22:50.700 than me you know i don't know how but either way uh he wasn't so he swung and i can almost like i

01:22:58.940 remember the sound of the bat wait you didn't see the swing of the bat came to the back of my head 0.66

01:23:03.640 So they clapped me in the back of the head and I woke up, I was, I had a bunch of cuts and bruises and everything all over me and I was leaking from my arms and shit. I think it was mostly from just hitting the ground like a tree, like, and, um, and I couldn't see out of my left eye and I was in and out of consciousness and I, and I managed to somehow get my way home, which was like, it was a little twisty and turny. I wasn't fucking exactly close to home.

01:23:27.480 it was still like a good 10 minute walk and i keep having these like these moments where every 0.76

01:23:32.780 time i come to consciousness i'm closer to home than i was before so somehow i'm on like autopilot

01:23:37.680 it's just straight concussion stuff yeah yeah yeah and then of course i get home and i just 0.51

01:23:41.560 fucking throw up everywhere and and my mom puts me in a tub of cold water tells me not to go to sleep 0.54

01:23:47.040 um concussion protocol yeah yeah we don't go to the hospital because they're just gonna make you 0.99

01:23:52.180 pay a lot of money to tell you not to go to sleep right yeah we call the cops the cops can't do

01:23:56.680 anything about it because it's like who am I even yeah I don't know but after that I become like a

01:24:01.880 very wild person um and that is like wild how like reckless um yeah reckless and much louder than I

01:24:14.360 ever was I used to be a pretty reserved kid so something happened you're like you know what I'm

01:24:18.580 not gonna go through this silent man like the Cypress Hill song I ain't going out like that

01:24:22.000 came on in your head and you were like you know what yeah I'm not sort of kind of I mean I just

01:24:26.040 became this really loud person like i wasn't always like that i used to be like pretty reserved

01:24:31.260 pretty in my friend group that was one thing but like you know what did you think guys like that

01:24:37.320 are just gonna get beat up with bats in the hood like i'm gonna have a voice now you know

01:24:41.040 so after that i move right and i move in with this new guy i do go to school for about a year

01:24:45.900 and a half before i'm kicked out and uh i'm like standing on teachers desks i'm kicking their

01:24:51.800 papers off their desks like all kinds of crazy you're just wiling out yeah yeah yeah i kind of 0.53

01:24:57.380 like lost my shit a little bit and um and it was it wasn't ever like mean it was like i just became 0.68

01:25:05.200 this character but whatever so um i move out after that and and you know after i get kicked out so i 0.91

01:25:14.740 get kicked out like the tail end of 16 something like that so i don't know you know the whole thing

01:25:19.760 is a little bit blurry maybe i move into this place at like 15 15 and a half by the end of like

01:25:24.980 16 i'm kicked out already um i obviously didn't keep going to school and i'm pretty much homeless

01:25:33.780 and uh and i'm staying over my girlfriends a lot it's just like some i'm messing up the timeline

01:25:40.640 a little bit like there's some molding or melding together of like a year of my life that i'm but

01:25:45.720 the last couple years of high school well i mean i was kicked out you know so i never did that i

01:25:50.360 got kicked out sophomore year so did you have a job when you were kicked out or did you just like

01:25:54.760 you were just like roaming the streets no i mean i i ended up moving into some dude's house he let

01:25:59.640 me stay there he was a heroin addict he ended up going to jail shortly after he let me stay there

01:26:04.200 so i have like a whole house and um but then of course we don't pay the bills so all the lights

01:26:08.600 go out and it's crazy and it becomes um abandoned and they get like these notices on the door

01:26:15.640 of like evacuation or not uh eviction and yada yada but we don't evict um so that's when you

01:26:21.760 move to florida no no no no okay so but during this time i'm electing to stay at my girlfriend's

01:26:27.640 a lot and i am looking this shit up till like five o'clock in the morning every night for a long

01:26:35.120 time like i i never had access to a computer like that so i'm just going nuts doing all the research 0.64

01:26:41.340 And I remember saying to myself, like, if this is a psychological phenomenon, all this stuff that I'm looking up, then it stands to reason that by by nature of looking at it, it might happen to you.

01:26:50.800 Like like if you watch a movie and then you have a dream about a movie. Right.

01:26:54.440 So I'm prepared for that. And I don't think that it's.

01:26:58.300 Yeah, I could see what you're saying. It's like as you read the Bible and you see these supernatural stories, you're saying, yeah, one of these stories could happen to me now.

01:27:04.080 Yeah, yeah. Well, this is, like, such obsession. And I think I'm also doing it because I'm outsourcing my own, like, pain and suffering of, like, my life being chaotic and fucking, you know, not having – I don't have anybody in my life anymore who was there since the beginning. Like, it's all gone.

01:27:22.340 So rather than face that reality, I'm, like, I'm outsourcing everything. I'm looking into this. This is my great, you know, mountain to climb.

01:27:31.080 Because one day you're going to have a podcast called Nephilim Death Squad, and you're going to be big doing this.

01:27:35.860 Well, no, more so, I don't want to – how could I do the insurmountable task of fixing my life?

01:27:41.660 Right.

01:27:42.080 I'm going to focus on this instead.

01:27:44.240 So it does happen.

01:27:45.900 One night I'm laying in bed next to my girlfriend, and I suddenly wake up, and I'm paralyzed.

01:27:54.700 and i had had sleep paralysis once before and mostly what i was comfortable with at this point

01:28:03.100 my research was that it was purely a biological function paralysis so you don't act out your

01:28:07.960 dreams so when i wake up my brain works really well just as well as waking life and i go oh

01:28:15.640 shit but you can't move i can't move and i go it's happening and i but but my follow-up thought

01:28:21.620 is like all right let's have a good time here let's relax yeah let's see what's going on and 0.99

01:28:26.660 i'm trying to wiggle my fingers and toes i'm trying to get out of it i'm looking around the 0.98

01:28:31.100 room everything's normal i can see my girlfriend this is the room i am awake i just can't fucking 0.71

01:28:39.060 move and all of a sudden all of a sudden all of a sudden i see the shadow of a man not a shadow 0.81

01:28:49.500 man the shadow of a man as if there's a light over here and a man over here and he's walking 0.92

01:28:55.720 which doesn't make sense there's a wall i'm up against a wall there's no fucking buddy over 0.83

01:29:00.200 there but there's this shadow that's cast on the other wall he's walking across the room he's got 0.97

01:29:05.060 a hat i don't remember and i go oh shit and that's about the last thought that i had before 0.53

01:29:13.820 i get this full body sensation like like farting nope that wasn't a fart all right i could see how 0.86

01:29:23.340 it was like it was like i was being tased except my whole body was getting tased and it caused me

01:29:30.560 to like i was already in paralysis but i like everything is tense like everything is getting

01:29:35.960 electrocuted wait but that's like a seizure bro like that's what you ever see have you ever seen

01:29:40.180 and they lock and they're so like you can't move their arm dude their arm feels like it's just the

01:29:44.800 strongest arm in the universe yeah that's what it was like exactly but it was my whole body and that

01:29:49.040 the stress of that and the sudden involuntary wave of fear but it was so much more than fear

01:29:54.860 it was like doom fucking doom yeah you never feel this outside in waking life uh-huh i've never felt

01:30:03.220 that um doom rushes over me my whole body is is like excruciatingly tense exhaustingly tense 0.98

01:30:13.120 and i black out and i come to and i'm on the other side of the fucking bed and my girlfriend's feet 0.87

01:30:22.000 are by my head now i can see her feet i can see the room and i'm my once again all faculties are 0.99

01:30:27.780 good i'm going what the fuck was that what the fuck is going on you went from just seizing up 0.98

01:30:32.580 getting tased and now all of a sudden you wake up and you're in a different position different 0.99

01:30:36.680 position same bed same room everything is she's been asleep the whole time she's asleep the whole

01:30:40.900 time i'm now looking at because of my perspective i can see the closet that would have been behind

01:30:45.820 us and that closet is just like one of those big closets where it's an opening you might have like

01:30:52.380 double doors that lead like collapsible a collapsible accordion double doors but there's

01:30:56.900 no double doors it's a sheet yeah a sheet on a string it's the hood yeah right that covers the

01:31:01.440 closet and as i'm thinking like what's going on all of a sudden this unbelievably bright white

01:31:08.960 light is pouring out of the closet which doesn't make any sense because there's no light in there

01:31:13.720 there's no switch there's nothing there's just and it's not even a closet that you can get into

01:31:18.220 if you put your arm in you could touch the back wall it's only deep enough for clothes 0.53

01:31:22.080 and and then it's happening again i'm getting buzzed the fuck up and electrocuted and i'm

01:31:27.880 looking at this light and everything's like whoa and then i black out again and i wake up in the

01:31:35.000 morning and it's like it never happened you just the next time that you're come to it's the morning 0.84

01:31:40.300 yeah and i didn't you know you don't have um when that shit happens you go okay so that may or may 0.92

01:31:47.880 not be an abduction i don't know i don't think it was an abduction i think um i don't think you 0.92

01:31:52.600 always have to be abducted i don't think you're always getting removed i think sometimes you're

01:31:55.880 getting removed do something to you like who the hell knows yeah who knows i wouldn't say i was

01:32:00.620 abducted that's why when alvarino alvarino must have heard me tell that story and said that i was

01:32:04.520 abducted like i never said that i was abducted i never i never to be perfectly honest i never felt

01:32:09.360 like i was removed from that place i guess you could say that you know yeah well they say you

01:32:14.640 get taken you brought back they erase the memories you don't know but like that's not the feeling

01:32:19.420 that i get i don't know and i think that counts for a lot when you have a supernatural experience

01:32:24.180 yeah the way that you feel about a thing your interpretation of it is kind of what do you mean

01:32:29.500 like a gut feeling you kind of go with the gut feeling discernment maybe i don't know what you

01:32:33.180 would call it but i just never felt like i was taken yeah um that wasn't something that really

01:32:37.500 even crossed my mind like the next morning you know it's only after the data chunking and seeing

01:32:42.000 the patterns that i can see how you might come to the conclusion i was taken so at that point

01:32:45.820 you're like i gotta get the f out of elizabeth new jersey i wasn't even in elizabeth by this time 0.95

01:32:51.620 i'm far from elizabeth i'm i'm in edison new jersey it's very far it's like fucking maybe 0.92

01:32:55.620 45 minutes an hour but that's the point where you go i'm moving to florida no uh i i then spend 0.95

01:33:01.240 many years being homeless and eating dumpster donuts and fucking like from uh 16 17 to like 0.79

01:33:09.500 young young adulthood 20 working or not working there were times where like i was working and 0.98

01:33:14.760 then you know you were just kind of mooching off this chick at her house or in a lot of ways yeah 0.99

01:33:18.780 yeah yeah and in fact i was a burden on that girl i fucking you know put her family relationship in 1.00

01:33:24.620 jeopardy like i was not um those people was not a blessing to them it was a fucking piece of shit 0.99

01:33:30.800 like i never did anything but at that age you don't even think about how do i be a blessing 0.99

01:33:34.820 to somebody else or better somebody else's life you're just thinking survival i was like i was

01:33:38.760 never rude and i was always like and you know but that just the existence of a young man sure 0.95

01:33:44.480 sneaking in and out of your house yeah and you're trying to fucking trauma for the household yeah 0.84

01:33:48.960 what would you say um uh you know sort of uh counsel your daughter against dating this homeless 0.98

01:33:55.760 retard and yeah and then that creates tension in there and it was but i love them yeah yeah yeah 0.99

01:34:01.480 but i love him he's got so much to offer he's not what you do a great job of sometimes securing the 1.00

01:34:06.720 bagel bag from the donut dumpster you know it was it was not good man embarrassing uh those people

01:34:12.080 where they suffered greatly because of me okay so that's not the what time period is the welding

01:34:17.760 job because i know you had a welding job with the uncle so you just do like loserville for a couple 0.59

01:34:22.660 years i do loserville till about 20 i get my shit together enough that uh me and this girl can have

01:34:28.480 an apartment you guys get an apartment together yeah we have an apartment uh successfully for 0.66

01:34:34.560 like a year and a half only. So I guess, um, by 2021 years old, I had an apartment and I made

01:34:45.900 this foolish decision that I needed to get an apartment that had enough room to take like some

01:34:50.100 of the homeless, like my homeless cousin with me. My cousin was homeless at the same time. And 0.89

01:34:53.760 I took him with me and, and his girlfriend and they stopped paying rent almost instantly.

01:35:00.400 so we lost that place so that falls apart and then about the next year i get you know a job

01:35:08.660 that's steady enough that i can get enough money and we can take another crack at it this time i

01:35:12.920 get an apartment with just my girlfriend so from like 21 to 22 maybe a little bit after that

01:35:19.320 um we have an apartment and i am i'm a merchandiser which is a guy who stocks the

01:35:26.960 shelves uh rearranges the shelves in a supermarket you know that's kind of cool yeah and i was i was

01:35:33.220 good enough at it and i got raised to like a management position pretty quickly and so you're

01:35:37.000 capable of keeping things like clean and organized yeah and um i don't know that and uh in that

01:35:44.880 apartment she ends up cheating on me and our relationship falls apart and we go our separate

01:35:51.320 ways and all of a sudden i find myself back at my mom's with that dude like the new i guess who is

01:35:58.700 my stepdad because they get married um they let me stay there for a little bit so i stay there for

01:36:04.560 maybe uh four or five months something like that and in that four or five months my wife comes into

01:36:11.820 my life and i become hyper obsessed and i go through this like rapid you knew her before

01:36:18.260 Knew her before.

01:36:19.060 Met her in high school.

01:36:21.400 We really hit it off, but I was dating somebody.

01:36:23.780 She was dating somebody, so it never went past anything like crazy.

01:36:26.760 As soon as she found out you were single, she broke up with the other guy.

01:36:30.100 She had been separated from that guy for a little bit, and she found out that I was single,

01:36:35.100 and she hit me up one day.

01:36:37.200 I get a message from her friend, because I think I had her blocked. 0.97

01:36:40.840 I had her blocked because she was a serious temptation, and I was not trying to fuck up 0.96

01:36:46.520 and you know be a bad person so um but she reaches out to me through a friend and says hey do you

01:36:53.560 want to come out she immediately takes me out to like a bar i'd never been to a bar and uh and i'm

01:37:00.300 just trying to act cool you know but i was i took her up on it immediately i went out and and i

01:37:05.400 became so obsessed and i went through this like rapid transformation because when you get into

01:37:08.660 relationship when you're in high school sometimes you kind of remain the same person it's almost

01:37:11.780 like everything kind of fell into place then you found the right job you're doing the stocking in

01:37:16.240 the grocery store by this time i had switched the grocery store stocking and i was a furniture

01:37:21.420 salesman at ashley's furniture i was actually crushing but yeah i could see that but a real

01:37:25.440 job so you even up you upscaled a little bit from the grocery store yes selling furniture yeah now

01:37:30.660 you're ready for a real relationship yeah everything's kind of falling into place so i

01:37:35.260 i saved up money real quick and um and we ended up moving out you know she she hung out with me 0.62

01:37:42.180 at my mom's house a couple times i was like i can't fucking do this not doing hanging out with 0.99

01:37:45.440 this chick at my mom's house so saved up money we got an apartment together like everything like 0.85

01:37:50.080 moved because we knew each other really well yeah like she was it's like you tell young people like

01:37:54.560 when you know when you know you know yeah things move so fast before you know it we were married

01:37:59.080 we had a kid on the way and all this other stuff and and that like so that's 10 years ago it's 10

01:38:04.620 years ago yeah yeah you know 10 years and nine months 13 really because i we met when we got

01:38:09.520 together when i was 23 by the time i was 24 and a half maybe 25 like we were already in this 0.55

01:38:14.860 apartment and expecting you know and married and all this shit like it was just whoa and wait so

01:38:22.660 where was the wedding at this wedding it was in my living room uh we had we got married by we had

01:38:28.860 somebody who officiated i think is a terminology in our in our living room who's there nobody for

01:38:37.620 me just just her family just her family yeah no way dude yeah yeah and um and then you know

01:38:45.180 however many so she just loves you this is a chick that just loves you she's just like yeah 0.63

01:38:49.120 he's crazy he nobody even from his family's even here for our wedding in our living room but like

01:38:54.140 i just love this dude i i so i start podcasting um maybe like two years after that something like

01:39:03.880 that and because i think in total it's been nine years now and she like never ever she always like 0.98

01:39:14.200 she used to say shit to me so she's like yeah you're gonna make it she knew we were fucking 0.98

01:39:18.840 bums dude no i know i'm hearing the story no fucking money whatsoever i'm selling game systems 0.99

01:39:26.360 and belongings to try to make ends meet like struggling struggling crushing as a furniture 0.99

01:39:30.980 salesman i guarantee no no no i lose that job oh you pissed somebody off because you're probably

01:39:36.360 good at the job it wasn't that i pissed somebody off it was that i was so obsessed with her 0.97

01:39:40.360 like it was like all i could think about i didn't want to do shit like i didn't want to go to work 0.66

01:39:45.060 i wanted to be with her i was like that's all i wanted to do wait before we go too far what's the 0.96

01:39:49.680 story where you saw somebody get punched your mom somebody a male you watched a man punch a woman

01:39:57.480 and like she hit the ground yeah that was brutal so what was that when when was that who was that

01:40:02.780 um hard to say how old i was uh maybe nine oh it was that it was that far back yeah so

01:40:12.100 who was it you know annual visits with dad every time i went over there he lived in elizabeth he

01:40:17.380 lived in the slums of elizabeth and shit would always go wrong it was always bad i mean i watched 0.96

01:40:20.960 my dad fight people i watched him go to jail i watched fucking everybody else fight people i 0.99

01:40:25.960 watch just all the worst shit all the time every fucking time I went over there so my mom was like 0.99

01:40:30.540 in no hurry to send me over there but she also never dissuaded me so if I wanted to see my father 0.99

01:40:34.940 she would try to make it happen eventually I stopped asking because it was like trauma every

01:40:39.300 single time I went but this was probably one of the last times for a really long time because he

01:40:44.780 went away for like I think maybe a few years for this I think he they even sent him to Texas because

01:40:50.420 he was technically still a citizen of texas and so they sent him to texas the dad was a texan

01:40:56.160 yeah he they came from south america landed in texas and then came to like new jersey what

01:41:00.900 south american nation uruguay so your dad's from uruguay yeah yeah yeah like from uruguay and lived

01:41:06.500 in texas yeah yeah um so what ends up happening is he he gets together with a lady after he 0.91

01:41:13.060 separates with my mom they have three kids and she fucking hates me so on the very rare occasion 0.99

01:41:18.260 she's a spanish chick too she's a bitch a monster and i've you know prayed for her and all that 1.00

01:41:23.220 shit because the fruits of her behavior have led her to a life where she's like she's on like 1.00

01:41:29.080 not hospice i don't know what she's in like her kids are separated from her she's in some sort of 1.00

01:41:32.680 like an institutionalized medical facility where she's lost her marbles it's like you just can't

01:41:37.140 get away from the crazy it's like oh 100 i like i've yeah yeah yeah so um that day in particular

01:41:45.940 she's really mad because my dad takes me to foreman mills foreman mills was like you go there

01:41:50.400 to get off brand dirt cheap clothing yeah so into that and he buys me a pair of red high top red and

01:42:01.260 white avarexes avarex is like a brand that nobody but i saw them i thought they were the coolest 0.71

01:42:06.000 shit in the world they were all shiny and red and and so he buys them for me could have been more

01:42:12.220 than like 20 dollars and when we get back they start arguing because he spent money 20 bucks on 0.98

01:42:18.420 shoes yeah yeah and i was like you know jess when she bought me these shoes today she she speaks

01:42:24.560 spanish so like she was always so it was a spanish chick yeah she was portuguese so she's always

01:42:29.800 talking shit about me speaking portuguese yeah yeah which is like similar yeah they say like 0.55

01:42:34.280 poco instead of poquito it's like very similar i don't know if i can't get any of the words so 0.98

01:42:38.320 um she is arguing with him which happens every time it's like when you're a kid you don't know

01:42:43.660 what they're saying but you can tell it's not good so every single time i'm there with them

01:42:48.720 she's arguing with him pronounce them them she's arguing with him about me right but i don't know

01:42:55.380 what they're saying because it's in spanish but i could pick up on that's freaking awesome so 0.97

01:42:58.760 they're going back and forth and basically she's so mad she decides to take the money out of his 0.96

01:43:03.640 wallet and i don't like it burn it on the stove which is no fucking retarded took the money turned 0.95

01:43:11.140 the stove on and like in spanish was like f you set it on fire and my dad just so defeated 0.99

01:43:17.900 just so defeated and i'm tired of arguing with you he just shuts down and he takes me he puts

01:43:23.980 me on his shoulders it's nighttime it's raining and um and he just starts walking with me and we

01:43:30.180 were walking through the streets of elizabeth we're walking pretty far i had some family i

01:43:33.620 guess that lived i don't know if you'd even call it walking distance a lot of the time when i spent

01:43:37.480 with my dad was spent walking through the hood because he didn't have a car um which is why he

01:43:43.780 never came to see me i usually have to get dropped off or he'd be illegally driving to come and get 0.98

01:43:48.280 me and we've gotten into police chases and shit and it's this hatchback honda civic fucking 0.97

01:43:53.460 it's so crazy so anyway um these people are all on drugs i think my dad was a big fan of cocaine 0.98

01:44:01.080 um so she gets in the car like she has a car she has a license and she gets in the car and starts

01:44:11.840 following us it's nighttime it's like late enough that there's not like a whole lot of congestion

01:44:16.220 around the streets and she's just following us around honking honking honking she's yelling out

01:44:21.000 the window he's just walking with me on his shoulders i don't know what's going on he's not

01:44:24.740 talking she's just following us for what feels like the entire night and then eventually she

01:44:30.300 managed to like tap him with the bumper hit him with the car and he's got me on his shoulders

01:44:34.740 so he almost falls everything gets all crazy and he takes me and he puts me down and i don't know

01:44:42.080 how he managed to contact my relatives but i think they were kind of trying to meet us

01:44:47.120 at the halfway point and so he puts me down and i'm sitting on the curb and it's raining

01:44:53.280 and he's arguing with this lady she gets out of the car they're going back and forth

01:44:56.460 one thing in spanish yeah and she starts slapping him over and over again bam bam

01:45:01.300 slapping him in the face slapping him in the face and you know i don't know how many slaps 1.00

01:45:05.520 it took but eventually he just cocks back and open hands her and ko's her and she falls like 0.99

01:45:10.800 a fucking tree and her head bounces off the curb and then he just sits down next to her body 0.99

01:45:16.220 and i'm sitting there he's sitting there and there's this fucking what it appears to be a 1.00

01:45:21.040 dead bitch like fucking 10 feet from me just sleeping on the curb and so he just kneels he 0.99

01:45:27.000 just sits down next door he's like well the cops are coming yeah because we've drawn so much 1.00

01:45:31.460 attention by this point you know the car is in the road with the wait oh geez man this is a lot

01:45:37.420 dude because i hate to say that it's like honorable but you're looking at your dad saying 0.87

01:45:42.220 damn dude the dad's actually like an honorable dude like he tried to get out of this he tried 0.97

01:45:45.740 to love his kid yeah he tried to get away he tried to defuse the situation this chick's bumping him 1.00

01:45:51.280 with the car and then he ultimately does a thing that he obviously regrets and hates or whatever

01:45:57.980 but uh what is that man regrets and hates but like he tried as long as he could to just not

01:46:06.220 uh be a part of that and then boom next thing you know he just is like bang yeah do the thing i 0.99

01:46:11.620 don't know what when you talk about smacking chicks it just does that oh shit what is happening 0.92

01:46:19.040 that's such a weird time for that to happen um yeah yeah so he sits there eventually my cousin 0.99

01:46:23.840 who's much older than me shows up the story just sucks dude it's like a guy he's just trying to

01:46:27.900 get away from the chick and then he does the wrong thing in the end yeah he goes away for a while 0.63

01:46:32.500 yeah um and the whole time he's just trying to get away get away kind of a dude i think he's got 0.93

01:46:37.320 like a history of domestic violence shit like him and my dad him and my mom used to fight but my mom 0.66

01:46:41.080 was like it's interesting because my dad is a dude who uh does a lot of violence and really loves 0.98

01:46:47.640 fighting it sounds so weird to say but like that was his shit you know like yeah he's from south 0.99

01:46:53.560 america he grew up in the fucking you know like loving the 80s kind of a like love those action 0.99

01:46:59.460 heroes kind of do like he was uh a macho man in that way so um i watched him fight a lot yeah but 0.97

01:47:06.780 But it sounds like that scenario, he wasn't trying to be a fighter.

01:47:09.900 He was doing everything he could to just get away, man.

01:47:12.680 Like, Chick, just leave me alone.

01:47:13.440 But I'm saying, like, his love for violence wasn't something that he had a handle on.

01:47:18.420 Right, right. 0.99

01:47:18.560 So he had some, like, domestic violence shit going on. 0.99

01:47:20.080 Sooner or later, like, that Chick knew that was going to happen. 0.99

01:47:22.460 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. 1.00

01:47:22.680 And she kept slapping him. 0.97

01:47:23.920 Yeah.

01:47:24.280 Yeah.

01:47:24.640 I think he's got it under wraps now.

01:47:27.200 It's been a long time.

01:47:28.100 If Jess is watching this, she'll be like, you always take the guy's side.

01:47:30.900 But I'm just like, I just hate these stories like this, dude.

01:47:33.420 Yeah, well, what was she wearing?

01:47:35.260 She was naked, actually.

01:47:36.900 No, no. 0.99

01:47:37.440 You know what's crazy is I saw her years later, and she, by that time, had spiraled into madness 0.99

01:47:44.040 and was wheelchair-bound and morbidly obese and fucking just, you know, so crazy, man. 0.99

01:47:50.660 You just have, like, this magnet to crazy people, dude. 0.99

01:47:53.700 Well, when I was living in that apartment that my girlfriend cheated on me in,

01:47:58.040 one day my neighbor came knocking on the door, and she goes,

01:48:01.180 I think I smell smoke.

01:48:02.080 Can you come to my apartment? 0.92

01:48:02.920 and I go oh yeah dude absolutely and I come in there and she shuts the door behind me and the 1.00

01:48:08.040 first thing she does is walk over to the couch climb on it and start looking out the windows 1.00

01:48:11.460 like looking like and she starts muttering some shit about like they're touching my mailbox again 1.00

01:48:16.520 and I'm like I never knew that this lady was crazy immediately I'm like oh shit schizophrenia 0.99

01:48:20.260 like I know what this is right yeah and I go hey so all drawn to you what do you say I go 0.98

01:48:26.320 I smell about those people about the no about the smoke about the smoke right and she's just like 0.84

01:48:32.220 she's doing such muttering crazy shit that eventually i go this is going too far and i'm 1.00

01:48:37.440 thinking like am i gonna have to boot her in the chest like if she tries to stab me or something 0.99

01:48:40.760 and i manage to like slip out the front door and i go into my apartment and i lock the door but 0.96

01:48:45.340 like yeah i attract crazy people for sure my my whole life i've been that so okay so there's

01:48:50.340 justification when you really are upset with me for introducing you to people because like i'm

01:48:54.520 i've never introduced you to a crazy person for the most part here i'm pretty sure that lady

01:48:57.340 okay it may be a handful but for the most part it's pretty normal people but you have like such 0.95

01:49:02.440 trauma from people you're like oh they might be a schizo no i don't think um i have a keen eye 0.96

01:49:09.380 for when somebody is uh one time i i was hanging out with my wife and her friend and her boyfriend 0.92

01:49:17.600 and i really liked that guy he was a good dude but he had a history of schizophrenia i didn't

01:49:21.320 know it at the time but we were sitting at a round table and we were drinking and by this time we

01:49:24.560 already 26 27 years old and you know everything's fun we're laughing we're drinking might be playing 0.81

01:49:31.040 the card game and this i fucking just see this guy like switch something's changed about i could feel 0.90

01:49:35.540 that something's changed about him and the girls haven't picked up on it at all and he's like 0.89

01:49:40.020 stone-faced all of a sudden it's so out of place for what's going on and and then uh i can see him

01:49:46.640 muttering stuff to himself and you're like bro you good no no so so what happens is i start they're

01:49:52.220 like ragging on him because oh it's not a good idea guys i can see it he's getting angry he's 0.98

01:49:57.400 muttering shit under his breath and and they don't understand what's going on and i'm fucking 0.99

01:50:01.080 kicking my wife under the table and she goes why are you kicking me and i'm like for fuck's sake 0.99

01:50:05.840 dude oh my god and and i i'm trying to explain i'm like like motioning over to him and i'm thinking 0.99

01:50:12.900 like um i'm gonna have to choke this guy to sleep so i live in a different reality right i've seen

01:50:20.260 these people so much i know what they're capable of i've grown up around violence so much i know

01:50:25.540 what it gets and i'm thinking preemptively right like the the main way to stop this situation so

01:50:31.460 long story short before it starts just choke him to sleep nothing nothing personal dude nothing

01:50:36.320 painful you got to go to sleep and we got to pack up and leave and um but it doesn't end up coming

01:50:41.760 to that my my wife eventually picks up on what's happening his girlfriend doesn't so she just keeps

01:50:47.240 on dunking on them and i we're staying over there for the night so i start making some noises that

01:50:52.560 kind of insinuate hey we should wrap up i'm getting tired like let's let's get ready for bed

01:50:57.980 and we end up doing that um and they go to the room years later we would find out that they

01:51:03.820 they banged that night and her takeaway from it was like it was a different person it was

01:51:10.340 actually really scary what happened to her like the the whole vibe of it and everything but like

01:51:16.000 that's where my head was going was like if this guy which that's just your thing now is just you're

01:51:20.600 so used to seeing craziness that you can spot it from a mile away you know when people are like

01:51:25.160 going from one person to another person or one realm to another realm if you will yeah i don't

01:51:30.500 have great discernment as to a person's like motives i tend to attribute a lot of positivity

01:51:35.600 to people and then oftentimes the only one who's good at the motive thing yeah yeah usually i don't

01:51:42.040 like to assume motive either i don't even like to i've learned a lesson with top where like

01:51:46.920 you know he knows the motive of another person the way we met he was doing that so i never like 0.91

01:51:52.420 whatever you're gonna do homie you're gonna fucking go at somebody for what you think you 0.82

01:51:56.640 see like that's how i met him so you know i yeah nothing's changed there but in those beginning 0.98

01:52:02.380 times i would be like damn like he's fucking awfully mean to this person and i don't know 0.79

01:52:06.580 that i see this thing that that he sees right now it's like i go yeah you probably give it enough 0.96

01:52:12.460 time and i'll see it top will see it first i'll see it like down the line after they do the thing

01:52:17.280 yeah cut the guy some slack no no you don't have to know he has a way to see but what i have is 0.86

01:52:23.840 like when you are crazy i fucking know it i can see it there's something behind your eye i used 0.99

01:52:28.900 you know i have friends that would drink and become different people yeah i fucking hated that same i 0.99

01:52:33.400 hated that i don't want to be around that because you're not even you like angry drunks that's always 0.99

01:52:38.180 a weird thing to me dude is the angry drunk i'm a sleepy hungry drunk so if i drink a lot i'm gonna

01:52:43.540 eat the food i'm gonna go to sleep and that's it that's pretty safe yeah yeah um actually i had

01:52:49.340 that throughout my life that might explain seeing the craziness might explain it like even when i

01:52:53.380 was on harder like yeah yeah if i'm gonna do this i don't want to really be engaged and involved in

01:52:57.700 anything i don't lose control yeah so a lot of drugs you know they cause you to like relinquish

01:53:03.020 control you become something different like never that was never me that was never me like i i was

01:53:08.220 on five grams of mushrooms one time my buddy's mom couldn't even tell because i don't like losing

01:53:12.940 control at all um but i'll see other people who do that they'll drink and they'll become somebody

01:53:17.340 else i don't like that man i don't like that away from that okay so so now you're with the wife

01:53:23.900 you're rolling along uh how do we get to where you moved to florida um so i mean you know i i

01:53:30.860 I'd become a welder for a while.

01:53:33.200 I was blessed to have a great uncle in my life.

01:53:37.140 Literally great uncle who took a liking to me and,

01:53:41.080 and taught me how to be successful in a field that I wanted nothing to do

01:53:44.340 with, but I had to,

01:53:45.140 because I wasn't able to make ends meet with my family.

01:53:47.640 So he gave me that ability and I ran with that and I developed a skillset

01:53:51.660 and I was a welder for the better part of the next decade. You know?

01:53:55.480 So if this, I became a welder at like 23, 24, and then I,

01:54:00.360 So you ended up being kind of a somewhat normal person then.

01:54:04.240 Yeah.

01:54:04.400 You kind of pulled it off.

01:54:05.300 Yeah, yeah, uh-huh.

01:54:06.200 Wait, because your son's born, and then that's when you start the welding?

01:54:10.260 Yeah, pretty much.

01:54:11.180 My son's born.

01:54:12.100 Shortly after that, I started welding.

01:54:12.920 You're like, yo, I need to switch from dumpster eating to full-on taking care of the family.

01:54:17.340 Actually, big shout-out to Joe Rogan because he made me obsessed for a period of time with self-discipline, health and nutrition, martial arts.

01:54:28.060 And those things really helped me to like learning martial arts helped me to learn to

01:54:32.580 weld discipline.

01:54:33.480 Yeah, sure.

01:54:33.900 Well, it wasn't even just that.

01:54:34.760 It was like, well, if you want to be a good boxer, what do you do?

01:54:37.400 You just, you practice the fundamentals a million times.

01:54:41.220 And then even when you think you've got them down, you practice them a million more times.

01:54:44.360 So you identify what the fundamentals are.

01:54:46.280 Okay.

01:54:46.520 You have a good stance.

01:54:47.600 You have a good guard.

01:54:48.320 You have a good jab.

01:54:49.080 You have a good cross.

01:54:49.960 You practice your head movement.

01:54:51.420 You practice your, your footwork.

01:54:53.560 That's it.

01:54:54.000 and you practice them over and over and over and over and over and over and over again so with

01:54:58.780 welding you can just do in your sleep so it's just muscle memory with welding nervous in a big

01:55:02.940 boxing match the crowd's going crazy you already got like this full-on just exactly muscle memory

01:55:08.040 so so with welding it's the same thing i i just they taught me what the fundamental welds were

01:55:13.080 and then on my lunch break before work so i would come in 45 minutes early and then uh through my

01:55:19.900 lunch break which is an hour or whatever it was so an hour and 45 minutes every day i'm just burning

01:55:24.600 the same welds over and over and over and over yeah yeah over and over and over and over you

01:55:29.840 loved welding um i i grew to love welding yeah um yeah because sometimes kids think they oh i gotta

01:55:36.280 have my dream job it's like no no no get a job and become passionate about it that's true man

01:55:40.520 that you love to get better at something and do good at there are more ideal circumstances in

01:55:45.280 which to do the thing that you're good at uh some more than others right so the place that i was

01:55:49.620 welding i started welding at 13 an hour you know and and i was welding it's not bad back then well

01:55:54.660 i was welding really difficult shit um and the pay wasn't that great and then i got to a place

01:55:59.660 where i was getting paid 36 an hour to weld stuff that was a lot easier but was a lot more fun like

01:56:05.600 it was fun and the environment that i was welding in was a lot more fun and they appreciated me and

01:56:09.500 they they let me be exactly who i am like this kind of person that i am some jobs you have you

01:56:15.140 have to tone it down yeah not this place good this place was uh khc crazy house customs in new jersey 0.96

01:56:21.440 fantastic i mean some of my favorite fucking people some of my favorite work experiences ever 0.98

01:56:26.180 and i was making parts for like the ford raptor and a bunch of other trucks and i was just damn 0.96

01:56:31.900 good at it and they appreciated that they also appreciated my humor and they let me be this

01:56:35.920 crazy person and i was just like i mean i became like a machine and what do you attribute it to

01:56:41.040 that you just got normal or somewhat normal.

01:56:44.120 My wife and my son, I had to.

01:56:45.660 Yeah, just that kind of locked you in

01:56:47.220 and you said, you know what?

01:56:48.240 Come hell or high water, like I gotta do this.

01:56:50.060 I can't leave them.

01:56:50.800 Like I can screw up my life,

01:56:51.800 but I can't screw their life up.

01:56:52.860 I had like a really normal life

01:56:53.840 for a long stretch of time.

01:56:55.240 Yeah.

01:56:55.820 And so I went through a lot of jobs though

01:56:58.520 and each job I had this thing in my head,

01:57:00.480 like I was supposed to do something else.

01:57:01.940 And that something else was podcasting.

01:57:03.180 And it's okay to find your way,

01:57:04.500 especially if you don't like go to college

01:57:06.000 for a certain path.

01:57:07.180 Like you kind of have to jump around,

01:57:08.800 which society says is bad,

01:57:09.860 You kind of have to find your way and figure out what's going to stick.

01:57:12.720 Well, I didn't – eventually what would happen at every job is I would say that it would kind of like kill my spirit and this idea of like life on repeat, the nine to five until I die and I feel desperately like I'm supposed to do something else.

01:57:26.960 And what was odd was that something else felt like podcasting, which was fruitless. 0.99

01:57:31.580 And I had people in my life who were talking shit to me or behind my back saying like, why the fuck is he doing this? 0.97

01:57:39.300 podcasting yeah why is he trying to podcast like this is literally not going to do anything for 0.99

01:57:43.080 him and i'm like every time i put it down i got to pick it back up so i did this i did a couple

01:57:48.080 shows um i'm not going to say the first one because i i think it was with my wife i think

01:57:53.180 she'd be mortified if anybody ever went back and found those those episodes we don't want to know

01:57:57.420 uh and then i did where i belong and then i did uh dick dudes and then what do you mean like in

01:58:02.260 your in your house like yeah in my house wherever i was i would move to places i moved here and

01:58:07.020 there and you just figured out how to set up a camera and just do a podcast keep doing it yeah

01:58:10.780 and then i you know i did another show called was it always about alien stuff no it wasn't about

01:58:15.700 that no it wasn't those stories always came up if you ever go back to those old what were you

01:58:19.800 talking about um whatever whatever i thought was interesting no no whatever i thought was

01:58:24.860 interesting so i talked to let's say my first thing with where i belong i talked to a guy who

01:58:29.220 was doing psychedelics i talked to another dude that was a stand-up comedian who did a documentary

01:58:33.740 on psychedelics. I talked to a bow hunter. I talked to a guy who did like the, what would

01:58:41.040 you call those? The really big trails that go across America. There's three big ones. There's

01:58:44.420 the Appalachian Trail. Not the chemtrails. You guys both say that the same time. He's awake, 0.98

01:58:51.120 though. That's good. That's good. The Appalachian Trail, the Pacific Crest or something, and then

01:58:56.320 there's another one. So I talked to that guy. So he hiked those trails. Yeah, it took days and

01:59:00.200 days or months whatever you want to talk about but i always kept going back to it and so this

01:59:06.120 last job you know the the the one that i was welding at that i was really good at i started

01:59:11.880 doing um david jay versus the world which was a comedy show and it was like well produced and we

01:59:16.480 bought a studio and we bought all the equipment and we we did it wait what when when was that

01:59:21.120 that was uh 2020 during covid yeah in new jersey in new jersey and i was doing it at the same time

01:59:28.340 that i was working and i felt really good like i felt really good like i was doing a good groove

01:59:33.040 i was doing a product that i was i was happy about oh there it is yeah dave and jay versus

01:59:36.640 the world bro that's awesome yeah there's there's our set i was really proud of that and uh but we 0.79

01:59:41.080 got no views because we couldn't market worth a shit we couldn't promote worth a shit we didn't

01:59:45.160 know how to use social media let's click one of those pictures bigger i want to see what he looked 0.97

01:59:48.620 like back we were doing a uh has he got your head in a noose he's got my head i bought him a knife

01:59:54.660 i don't like one of his things i don't like it and uh i don't like that picture oh i remember 0.95

01:59:59.140 that episode we were talking about a guy from fucking like survivor who gores a pig uh on the 0.88

02:00:04.980 on the show i could get down with that but not with the doing it to a human okay so you're doing 0.97

02:00:09.480 that in 2020 we we don't have a ton of time i wish we had more time but top's got to go

02:00:13.940 and he doesn't want to go on the next show too okay yeah we know but i gotta know anyway no no

02:00:18.800 know how i gotta know how did you leave new jersey did you meet top while you were up north or did

02:00:24.720 you meet him when you got here how did all this part of the story that everybody wants to know

02:00:28.960 i'm in new jersey um the podcast ended because my homeboy had a baby and he was like i just want to

02:00:35.000 do all hands on deck with the baby i said okay man that's cool so we we stopped doing the show

02:00:38.760 i was still working at khc i still wanted to do a show and the other thing was like i'm making

02:00:45.500 pretty decent money but like the housing market still looks like a nightmare i'm still going to

02:00:49.820 be stretched thin like i want to go and have something more i don't want to just stay here

02:00:53.860 and settle because there is still something in me this is what really showed me like there's

02:00:58.160 something wrong there's something calling to me and it calls to me across all these jobs and even

02:01:02.480 when i have one that's good and these people love me and i love them and they've become almost like 0.99

02:01:07.500 family which is the gayest cliche shit to ever say about a job still like something is fucking 0.99

02:01:12.180 wrong. Yeah. Something is wrong. So we decided like, Hey man, let's take a chance. Let's go to 1.00

02:01:17.380 Florida. And my wife's about it. I was also getting sick. So I had cancer. And then after I, 1.00

02:01:23.740 I got the cancer testicles. Yeah. The one, well, one of the testicles, just get them cut out. 0.95

02:01:27.780 You just cut, lose the nut. And, but after that, how did you know you had, I felt it in the shower 0.99

02:01:32.900 over and over again. What do you mean? You could feel the nub on it, especially when you got your

02:01:36.840 balls all sudsy, you know, you get a real good feel for them. You know, your balls, right? You're 1.00

02:01:40.640 with them all the time. Every shower you take, you go, I know these balls. And then all of a sudden, 0.99

02:01:45.000 like one day I was like, I don't know these balls. And then like the next time I showered, 0.98

02:01:50.060 I was like, yeah, that's still there. So it took like a lot of confirmation. Showers was always the

02:01:55.340 place where I'm like, no, I know this thing has not always been there. Like there's some sort of

02:01:59.980 tough spot on my nut. And it ended up being cancer. We didn't get it biopsied because we

02:02:05.420 didn't want it to spread. Doctor was like, look, you're still going to crush if I cut this thing

02:02:08.600 off. Nothing's going to change. I said, all right, man, let's just cut it off. It turned

02:02:11.960 out to be, yeah, it was cancer, but it was like real low grade shit. Like some Manoa 1.00

02:02:15.600 cancer. I don't know what the fuck it was. Um, it was such a blip on the radar of my 1.00

02:02:19.200 life. It moved really fast. Like I found it. I took care of it. I had no history of going

02:02:23.560 to the doctor, but at this point, like something just moved me through the system. I took care

02:02:27.240 of it, recovered from the surgery super fast. And, um, I was doing Dave and Jay versus the 0.96

02:02:32.740 world while I had that whole surgery done for content. It was fast, man. It was, and

02:02:36.920 And I'm never, like, the type of person, like, you've never heard me say, have you ever heard me say I'm a cancer survivor?

02:02:42.540 Never.

02:02:43.280 I won't say that because it's like, bro, it barely existed in my life.

02:02:46.420 It was so fast.

02:02:47.460 Yeah.

02:02:47.900 And it was not.

02:02:48.580 Well, you don't have a victim mentality either, you know.

02:02:50.880 Right.

02:02:51.300 Not to knock anybody who says, oh, I'm a cancer survivor, but I'm just saying you don't associate. 1.00

02:02:54.920 Well, motherfuckers actually go through cancer, you know. 0.99

02:02:55.680 You don't associate with, like, yeah, this is who I am. 1.00

02:02:58.120 This is my identity.

02:02:58.960 I also didn't go through anything.

02:02:59.680 You know, I went through surgery, which was, like, the recovery time was really, really fast.

02:03:03.480 But something did happen in my immune system after that, and every winter from that moment on ended up giving me pneumonia and a collapsed lung and all this other shit.

02:03:10.720 So I was like, it's time to go. 0.90

02:03:12.320 We need to go someplace warm.

02:03:13.400 I can't be here anymore. 0.99

02:03:14.160 It's kicking my ass, and we came to Florida. 0.99

02:03:15.960 What year do you move to Florida? 0.99

02:03:17.360 2023?

02:03:19.500 And you know top at that time or don't know top?

02:03:21.120 2024.

02:03:21.760 I mean, I'm sorry, 2022.

02:03:23.000 I move in 2022.

02:03:24.720 I land.

02:03:26.100 I buy a house within a month and a half.

02:03:28.200 I have this really weird moment where I am received by family that I've never known.

02:03:32.220 I haven't had family.

02:03:33.180 You moved to the area because you had family in that area.

02:03:35.580 Yeah, I had like 30 family members in one area, plus Port Ritchie.

02:03:39.240 Dad's side?

02:03:39.440 Yeah, yeah.

02:03:40.120 So I had no relationship with any of them.

02:03:41.920 And I wanted to try to be able to give my son like a grandfather,

02:03:45.100 and I wanted to ease this old man's suffering

02:03:47.140 because I knew that he was so remorseful for not having a relationship with me.

02:03:50.660 And I thought like, yo, I don't have to harbor resentment.

02:03:52.660 I can go and build something and give my son something

02:03:55.740 and take some responsibility for whatever part I play in this distance from my family. 0.97

02:04:01.040 dad has surrounded himself by crazy people he has a new woman she's a witch and it just would not 0.99

02:04:06.920 work out like every witch way i mean literally a witch she's like putting panties in the coffee 1.00

02:04:11.200 pot she's uh burning effigies and whispering to them he tells me she's a witch like she does 0.99

02:04:16.000 spellcraft and shit he's too retarded to realize it so um you know i do have this really beautiful 0.99

02:04:22.640 moment where like i get to i buy a house i immediately land a job as a welder i get paid 0.98

02:04:31.140 pretty decent especially for somebody in my area and i have family like very cool very normal yeah

02:04:39.620 and it's beautiful i'm having kids over for pool parties barbecues with my family at my house and

02:04:46.460 you're just playing it cool like you're a normal person you're like sweetie don't let anybody find

02:04:49.820 were crazy like just play it cool then spiritual insanity after spiritual insanity entities and

02:04:58.220 and banging on my windows and doors and walls that all throughout the day and night and and

02:05:04.780 big black flies that seemingly have no source they're just filling my house and and the only

02:05:10.780 way of course i've had by this point a demonic encounter which i've talked talked about and it's

02:05:16.540 It's going to be too long.

02:05:17.240 You never told me.

02:05:18.220 I did tell you the thing that I prayed away in the name of Jesus Christ.

02:05:24.020 I literally can't get into it because we don't have the time for it.

02:05:26.380 And people can go and find this.

02:05:27.460 I've talked about it every which way.

02:05:28.720 We'll do it on part two.

02:05:30.600 So I'm coming to Christ during this time.

02:05:33.740 And I know how to deal with it. 0.99

02:05:35.820 So the only way I make this shit stop in my house, my new house, is by taking authority over it. 0.99

02:05:41.140 This is my house in the name of Jesus Christ. 0.99

02:05:43.120 You have no.

02:05:43.500 How did you even get into the Jesus game? 0.99

02:05:46.300 Like, how did you even I had an experience that I needed to make stop. 0.69

02:05:51.680 And it was a demonic entity that I had seen that my wife had seen and that my son had seen.

02:05:57.320 And I didn't know what to do because you don't have any recourse.

02:06:02.160 How did you even have a grid for that?

02:06:03.960 Like, Jesus was no idea.

02:06:05.840 Anything.

02:06:06.580 Well, no, no.

02:06:07.600 So you're not really a Bible reader.

02:06:09.100 You're not a churchgoer.

02:06:10.380 Of course, in conspiracy, the Bible comes up constantly.

02:06:13.580 Yeah.

02:06:13.760 So, like, I guess I had that kind of framework.

02:06:15.460 like I wasn't unfamiliar with it and you're like let's give it a shot I had no other option so

02:06:20.920 um that event stopped when I did that yeah so now that I'm having like these things all around my

02:06:28.340 house I I start taking authority over my home and praying the blood of Christ over my home and

02:06:33.480 and telling these things that they have no right to be here I'm the legal owner of this house in

02:06:39.180 the name of Jesus Christ leave this place this you know property all these things and it stops

02:06:44.060 Wow.

02:06:45.280 And then.

02:06:47.540 But nevertheless, you're like, honey, we got to get out of here.

02:06:50.300 No, no, no, no.

02:06:51.540 So, I mean, we're still in that house.

02:06:53.000 I mean, the one that I bought here in Florida.

02:06:56.000 And around the same time, I start to have a presence on Twitter. 1.00

02:07:00.700 And I decide after like having some interactions with some content creators that ended up being like occultist faggots. 1.00

02:07:07.660 I go, I'm going to start my own show. 1.00

02:07:10.320 and it's time to just do like i'm gonna do a show and it's about this stuff instead of comedy or my

02:07:15.200 interest like it's about this so i start a show called the raven's watch and we're gonna wrap it

02:07:20.460 up you know because i know we're coming no no no we got 20 minutes man we have plenty of time

02:07:23.920 um so i start this show called the raven's watch and i also because of the event where i saw this

02:07:33.600 demonic entity and my family saw it i start looking for anybody else who's talking about

02:07:38.880 seeing shit like i've seen yeah and stopping it in the name of christ and i find tony merkel's 0.50

02:07:44.080 the confessionals which is every episode is pretty much that and that's 20 what 2022 2022 0.96

02:07:49.020 so i'm listening to that show all the time i'm listening to other people who have had these

02:07:53.820 experiences and have called on christ and stopped it and i'm orienting towards christianity and i'm

02:07:58.880 starting to tell these stories and and you know talk about conspiracy and i'm having a lot of

02:08:04.600 success actually like really fast success i mean the amount of time that it took to grow but you're

02:08:09.280 og in the game at that time dude you've been living it nobody knows me though like it doesn't

02:08:13.220 matter i'm not in the game i know but your content is what matters dude like that's still what

02:08:17.860 matters and like you've got the content because you've been living it your entire life well i

02:08:21.660 managed to grow that show i mean dave and jay versus the world had all the production had a

02:08:26.900 studio all the shit we couldn't break maybe a couple of hundred subscribers but i got the

02:08:32.640 Raven's watch, which was just happening in my bedroom with a backdrop and a microphone 0.97

02:08:36.600 to over a thousand in like a couple of months. And that was crazy. Cause I had been working at

02:08:42.620 Dave and Jay for like a straight year and just did nothing with it. And the way that I was doing

02:08:46.240 it was I was going and getting involved in conversations that were happening on Twitter

02:08:49.680 about the hat band, about this entity. And then people were finding you from the Twitter and

02:08:53.580 coming and watching YouTube. You're like a thousand on YouTube. So they'd find you on the

02:08:58.200 tweeter and then boom they come check out your youtube yeah and and so one day i'm uh you know

02:09:03.800 i end up finding top on the members community of the confessionals it's like you're what do you

02:09:10.300 mean you're like patreon for the confessionals more or less and i see him he said a couple of

02:09:15.380 interesting things yeah oh yeah there we go that's i mean that's the backdrop that's me and top

02:09:21.060 talking to tony merkel that's funny um you guys went on tony merkel no we had him on uh really

02:09:27.860 early no but that's it i mean that brick backdrop is the corner of my bedroom brilliant yep and i

02:09:33.920 had some leftover equipment from when i did dave and jay versus the world and that's what i was

02:09:37.360 using came on your guys show right when you met in fact that is the backdrop from dave and jay

02:09:42.900 versus the world look at this two years ago yes with uh thomas yep that's only two years ago

02:09:49.380 machine cashman yeah man yeah what so i find hey look shout out uh bill and ted oh there you go

02:09:57.300 yeah no way that's only two years ago that's the guy there that uh that stormed the capital with

02:10:03.720 the the bull helmet what was that yeah the the shaman the q anon show these guys are finding

02:10:09.620 you and coming on your low production no no we were finding them and because of you guys are

02:10:14.060 just crushing on the tweeter i don't know i i guess i mean tops uh top had already established

02:10:18.880 a reputation worked with a lot of big people he had you know some some clout going on so he made

02:10:24.460 um access to guests very easy so we had that he had built this thing this this sort of network

02:10:32.540 um on twitter and through his business everything no no no no like shooting out of his eyes like

02:10:37.900 i guess some of that kill people but also like working i mean he's doing graphic design he's

02:10:42.140 right and he's you know he's got his own stuff too his own personality on twitter that he yeah

02:10:46.460 you could by that time he already had like 20 000 you know uh followers or some like that so

02:10:51.340 So that made the guests a lot easier, but, um, 20,000.

02:10:55.900 Yeah.

02:10:56.200 So how many do you just top out of now? 0.99

02:10:57.560 Like fucking 50, 60,000, something like that. 0.99

02:11:00.420 And they just love him. 1.00

02:11:01.700 Just like shredding people to pieces.

02:11:03.520 They love them for that.

02:11:04.380 Who get it.

02:11:05.180 You know, the other people, they, so if you're on Twitter, do you have to say stuff every

02:11:08.380 day?

02:11:09.220 You say whatever you, you mean you do whatever you want?

02:11:11.000 Not every day.

02:11:11.680 Yeah.

02:11:12.140 But almost every day you just go on there and say some mean things to people.

02:11:15.080 I only say whatever I want to say whenever I want to say it.

02:11:17.560 Yeah.

02:11:17.840 And you go through spurts, it seems like, cause you come in here from time to time.

02:11:20.640 like oh man this thing with the mermaid or like whatever another thing because i only do it when

02:11:25.320 it moves me but uh so so i find him on the members thing and then i find him on twitter and i see

02:11:32.320 some of the shit he's saying he's very funny and i go like this guy kind of seems cool so i have a

02:11:37.400 couple interactions with him where i call him the he's the bad guy from the zohan the adam sandler 0.94

02:11:42.560 film um uh i forget what his name is but he looks like that actor and i and i drop that on him and

02:11:49.720 got a good sense of humor about it and one day you guys just kind of start courting each other

02:11:57.320 and and then one day he like he laughs at something but he goes i'm about to block you 0.99

02:12:02.280 faggot and i go wait no no no i'm cool i promise and and we we get into this little yeah yeah that 0.99

02:12:08.120 guy he looks like it looks like that guy he's not like kramer like yeah the mookindookin uh 0.99

02:12:15.320 Panda fly knows. 0.99

02:12:16.060 So I guess what ends up happening is we get into a conversation and I tell Top I do a show about all this crazy shit. 0.97

02:12:26.060 And I already know that he's interested in it because we are on the members community of the confessionals. 0.95

02:12:31.220 So Top goes, I'm going to actually check it out. 0.97

02:12:33.220 And then he fucking does, which is insane because to tell anybody, hey, watch my two hour long fucking podcast, even though I have no followers or anything. 0.99

02:12:42.220 That's a huge. 0.99

02:12:43.180 So I shouldn't do that to people. 0.58

02:12:44.480 you can try but you just will find that people won't fucking do it they don't care right yeah 0.99

02:12:48.700 they don't give a shit i don't know that i would watch fucking somebody who came up to me and said 0.99

02:12:51.900 watch my whole episode like probably not dude fair point but he watched the thing he thought it was 0.99

02:12:56.360 interesting we got into a conversation he said hey he was doing his own show called the top 0.95

02:12:59.880 lobster show on the side of the top lobster show yeah on this and it was about very similar shit 0.99

02:13:04.940 yeah very similar shit testimony spooky shit let's collaborate we did a collaboration it was 0.98

02:13:09.580 cool then i end up going to new orleans for a vacation with my wife and it ends up being really 0.98

02:13:15.160 strange i mean a lot of weird crap happens you in new orleans and anything bizarre i did uh i went 0.86

02:13:20.700 to a tarot card reader i did a bunch of fucking shit yeah and um i get a call while i'm out there 0.96

02:13:26.720 and it's top and he goes yo i think we should do a show let's try to make a show like like let's 0.98

02:13:33.880 make a show i already had nephilim death squad tucked to the side it was originally a twitter

02:13:37.480 group that i had some people in it was top it was the guys from the phone booth podcast a few other

02:13:41.640 people paul stobbs escanor this is only two years ago uh two and a half so you guys have moved fast

02:13:47.800 dude oh that's our first episode actually we did a trial episode right there to see how it would

02:13:52.760 work it was a swap cast see uh episode 13 swap cast with top lobster and um and that guy is

02:14:00.000 actually a new age sort of uh he's more into the occult and he basically but you guys were kind of

02:14:06.400 into that back then you guys were kind of like no i mean he was basically saying christianity 0.86

02:14:10.140 is all bullshit and it's all strictly allegorical for the stars and constellations and there's no 0.82

02:14:14.580 nothing i know but even when i met you guys you were having some people saying the bible is just 0.99

02:14:18.100 like it doesn't matter what they say you know we always allow people to have a mom although we've

02:14:22.880 moved away from that so much these days but anyway uh he calls and he says let's do this and i've

02:14:27.140 already got a name loaded up and i go like yeah man i think we could we'll talk about it more when

02:14:31.180 i leave new orleans and when i hang up with him i'm in the middle of the the hotel i still remember

02:14:35.880 this moment i go to my wife and i go yo i think this is it yeah like this is the one it's actually

02:14:42.080 incredibly you know not that to say i would ever prophesy over anything and it wasn't me prophesying

02:14:47.560 it was like a stirring in my spirit like i don't know what it means to prophesy so maybe maybe that

02:14:51.520 is to speak forth the mind of god yeah i said this is going to be it and it is it has been 0.91

02:14:58.980 it's it's that was entirely accurate but i knew that in my spirit at that moment in that fucking

02:15:05.100 hotel room that was certainly haunted there was things it was a whole thing but um i i just knew 0.56

02:15:12.120 it i knew he was gonna say that i knew he was going to i knew it's gonna sound really weird 0.81

02:15:18.420 like i knew it was him in the fucking chat of tony merkel's thing yeah i saw this dude i saw 0.89

02:15:24.780 clicks with this guy man me and this guy's spirit kind of went out of my way i went out of my way 0.96

02:15:29.720 To seek this dude out, found him on Twitter, and then slowly started to be like, poke, poke.

02:15:35.800 Yeah, this is a guy I could get down with.

02:15:37.560 Something was there.

02:15:38.440 I don't know what the hell it was.

02:15:40.020 And now it has been.

02:15:41.720 No, no, I'm very familiar with that feeling out process with Top.

02:15:44.600 I know exactly what you're talking about. 0.97

02:15:46.360 Well, I think that's very much how Top felt about this place because he kept telling me, you know, you got to come to this coffee shop and meet this wanker. 0.97

02:15:53.040 And I'm like, I don't know. 0.98

02:15:53.880 Oh, yeah.

02:15:54.060 When he was courting me, I look back on it now, it was very intriguing the whole way.

02:15:57.900 No, I didn't understand what he was getting at.

02:15:59.840 You didn't like it.

02:16:00.680 You didn't like it at all.

02:16:01.320 I didn't like it because I don't really go out of my way.

02:16:02.440 The first time you came in, you just had, like, I don't know how else to say it, but 0.99

02:16:05.460 a shit-eating grin, and you were just like... 0.99

02:16:07.660 He was like, there's something special here. 1.00

02:16:09.380 Yeah, and you were like, no.

02:16:10.380 You came in, everybody thought you were, like, an undercover cop.

02:16:13.620 Nobody thought that.

02:16:14.360 Everybody thought that, and you just had, like, this weird vibe, and I was like, that 0.98

02:16:17.780 dude's either a total faker and a wanker, or he's, like, super real. 0.98

02:16:20.980 I'll tell you what, though. 0.99

02:16:21.120 But he's not going to be anything in between.

02:16:23.200 It was very weird.

02:16:23.780 Then you guys even had to go sit outside to have the initial conversation

02:16:26.860 because Top pushed hard in the beginning, dude.

02:16:28.860 He was really pursuing me.

02:16:32.240 Yeah, he was really pursuing me, you know, and I was like, okay, man, I got it.

02:16:35.540 And then you guys, like, went outside to talk, and I was like, oh, okay.

02:16:37.960 And I said, I was like, oh, yeah, he seems like a cool dude.

02:16:40.020 He seems like he gets it, but, like, I didn't see whatever Top was seeing.

02:16:42.700 I don't think Top knew what he was seeing either, but that's, like, any time.

02:16:46.220 He was like, look, we've got a track record of going to coffee shops

02:16:49.160 and starting podcasts.

02:16:50.820 Like, why wouldn't we do that here? 0.94

02:16:52.120 this guy seems like a dumb southerner like we could probably take advantage of he was right 0.96

02:16:55.740 about that he's a tough crowd today dude he's like half asleep man but um you know i i think 0.98

02:17:02.280 about that every once in a while because whatever this show becomes and there's a lot of people i

02:17:05.940 don't know if you could imagine this a lot of people don't want us to succeed who that's a lot

02:17:11.120 of them you know i don't know what for dude i think a lot more people you're saying a lot more

02:17:15.800 people want us to succeed than don't but the people that what are the type of people that 0.99

02:17:19.780 wouldn't want you to uh wankers faggots you know but what what like what is it that you're just 0.99

02:17:25.340 touching a nerve or do you think they're jealous like they can say the stuff that i want to say 0.99

02:17:28.960 that i can't say so so i could say one camp in particular are people that think that we're not

02:17:33.880 actually christian and that we're just like grifting off of it because there's some profit

02:17:37.220 to be made within no no they'll figure it out those guys will figure it well i mean that's an

02:17:41.100 interesting thing you know on its on its face because you don't understand the things that

02:17:46.360 bought us here you know top's got his own there's also a funny thing for christians that they love

02:17:51.760 these passages of story like that jesus was hanging out with sinners they like people love those

02:17:56.380 stories until they're they're actually watching it yeah until it's actually real in their life

02:18:00.560 then they hate then they hate it and they can't even understand that like hey you're talking about

02:18:04.620 this exact scenario that played out in scripture they don't like it and they don't like the idea

02:18:09.040 of like somebody growing in christ they don't like that idea either they're like well if you're not

02:18:13.600 already a super mature christian doing all the not saying cuss words eating chipotle now then

02:18:18.020 you're not a real christian it's like guys this is a long game like this is there's a lot going on

02:18:21.980 it's it's weird though because like i said i had this notion forever to like do something like

02:18:26.020 this i didn't really quite know what it was but like god gave me this moment of a crack at a

02:18:32.120 normal life and i don't think it was real i think he just wanted me to see that because there was a

02:18:36.980 lot of like doubt in my mind as to what do you mean he's like you could live a normal life dude

02:18:42.560 you don't have to live in crazy town forever i don't think that was really the point i think it

02:18:45.780 was like okay you're not going to understand that you're not meant for this unless i give it to you

02:18:50.840 uh-huh and then he gave it to me and it was like you're saying the welding and like the normal 0.94

02:18:55.620 the welding the house the fucking family like all that stuff it was like no i i am meant for 0.91

02:19:01.920 something a lot crazier and i think that and still the dad and the husband and doing what's right 0.99

02:19:07.000 yeah yeah because i have all these beautiful moments like i get to spend time with my wife

02:19:11.900 and my son and, and I get to show my son not to settle. Like you don't have to settle. There's

02:19:17.740 nothing wrong with having like a normal job, but like, I think there's a time and a place you,

02:19:21.880 you go there, you learn how to, but like, I think if you're called to carve something out on your

02:19:26.540 own, then like go and do that. Go and do that. I think so many people are called to do that.

02:19:31.860 And it's just scary to take those steps. We have the same story. Like people said,

02:19:35.820 Oh, you're going to spend all your life savings, even though you live in a rental house and open

02:19:39.500 a coffee shop and half of it you don't make any money half you're gonna pay for double the build

02:19:43.200 out double the rent double the electric to have a christian library what if you lose everything

02:19:47.980 and we were like jess and i both were like yeah rather lose everything hell yeah tell the kids

02:19:52.580 yep if you there's something that you dream of do it yeah what are you if you say that to your kids

02:19:57.640 and then don't do it absolutely yeah absolutely like i think like if my son ends up getting a

02:20:01.600 welding gig let's say one day like yeah awesome hell yeah man and like learn that because i think

02:20:05.960 there is something to like building things and doing things with your hands and all that is

02:20:08.800 really fantastic something else man don't be afraid don't be afraid yeah don't be afraid to

02:20:12.860 do that and i think that god i think part of my life you know being so chaotic was so that when

02:20:20.260 it came time to like make a jump it wasn't it was not even a decision it wasn't even like a thing

02:20:25.460 that i had to think about yeah it was like yo let's let's do this let's we'll put it all i

02:20:29.860 remember when the show started making enough money and i told my wife i think that we can

02:20:34.240 turn this into something can you handle the bills for like however long this takes because i think

02:20:39.880 we're right there and she said yeah i can do that so did you call her sugar mama for a while i didn't

02:20:44.200 do that you never said she wanted me to i didn't say sugar mama uh but she held it down for maybe

02:20:50.860 like eight months or something like that and then and then we got there and it was enough and the

02:20:55.200 show was suddenly doing it so yeah man um i don't mean to be like you're looking around you're making 0.99

02:20:59.180 Well, no, it's not the same as I hear Hat Man, but I hear boomers. 0.97

02:21:01.940 And so I just kind of, yeah, the olds are like starting to make their move. 0.97

02:21:05.060 All right.

02:21:05.680 So can we just wrap it up or do we have to do like some big sentimental closing after all this?

02:21:09.740 Because it was such a big deal.

02:21:10.320 I would appreciate if you said anything that was like maybe nice.

02:21:29.180 you

Nephilim Death Squad - June 11, 2026

The Raven ｜ Straight Bible

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