105： Creating Financial Independence ｜ Jeff Rose
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Summary
Jeff Rose with Good Financial Sense joins me to talk about the importance of learning about money from the right people, what to look for in a good financial advisor, how to talk with your kids about money, and how you can create financial independence.
Transcript
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Money has always been a difficult topic. The reality is that this little green piece of
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paper that we call money has a much greater impact than the dollars and cents. It permeates
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every element of our lives, including our sense of worth and all other emotions that money
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manifests. My guest today, Jeff Rose with Good Financial Sense, joins me to talk about the
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importance of learning about money from the right people, what to look for in a good financial
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advisor, how to talk with your kids about money, basic principles of wealth building,
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and how you can create financial independence. You're a man of action. You live life to the
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fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back
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up one more time. Every time. You are not easily deterred, defeated, rugged, resilient, strong.
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This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become at the end of the day.
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And after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man. Gentlemen, what is going on today?
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My name is Ryan Mickler and I am the host and the founder of Order of Man. I hope all is going well
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for you today. I want to welcome you to the Order of Man podcast. This, if you don't already know it
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by now, is a podcast for men who want to be better men. So if that's you, I am glad that you're here.
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If you know of another guy who would be interested in what we have to share, I also invite you to share
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this message. Tell them about this podcast and what we're doing within Order of Man. Now, before I get
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into the topic of money today, I do want to share a couple of quick resources I know you're going to be
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interested in, especially if you want more when it comes to being that better man we talk about.
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If you're looking for the show notes and the details of my conversation with Jeff today,
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you can check that out at orderofman.com slash 105 as in episode 105. If you're looking to connect
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with some other like-minded men, we're about 24,000 men to be exact. You can do that inside of our
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closed Facebook group. It is a closed group specifically for men. So you can know that we're
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having the real discussions that men want to have. You can do that at facebook.com slash groups
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slash order of man. And third, if you really want to take this thing up a notch, if you're ready to
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take this to the next level, you can join us inside of our exclusive mastermind, the iron council. You
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can do that at order of man.com slash iron council. I'll talk a little bit more about that during a
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break. And before I introduce you to Jeff, I do also want to let you know about our friends and the
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show sponsor 511 tactical. You've probably heard me talk about their mission of always be ready. And
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that's something that we certainly subscribe to here at order of man. If you're a man who prides
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element of my training. And I think you should too. And if you do decide to pick something up, all I ask
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is that you use the link we've created order of man.com slash 511 as in 511. So they know you're an
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order man listener and that we're all on the same mission of being better men. Again, that's order
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man.com slash 511. Now with all that said, I am so honored guys to introduce you to someone who
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indirectly has been so instrumental in helping me launch order man. I started following the financial
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advisor, blogger, author. His name is Jeff Rose. When I started my financial planning practice. In fact,
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I actually reached out to him to help me launch my online financial business, which eventually morphed
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and changed into what you're listening to now, which is the order of man podcast. He's known for rallying
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thousands and thousands of people around his money movements, which include debt movement, life
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insurance movement, a Roth IRA movement, and most recently the money uprising movement. Today, Jeff gets
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very practical with us about how he learned about money, the goods, the bads, the uglies,
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and a few of his 12 principles or rules to building more wealth in your life.
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Jeff, what's going on, brother? Thanks for joining me on the show today.
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We were talking briefly and a lot of guys listening to this aren't going to know this,
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but they better be aware of this because without you, and I don't think you were aware of this until
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recently, without you, nobody would even be listening to this podcast right now. So you didn't know
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that before we started, right? I did not know that, no.
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Yeah. A couple of years ago, I hired you as a coach, a consultant. You gave me a couple
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little insights. I think we were on the phone for literally an hour and you gave me some insights
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to a previous life, which was a financial podcast called Wealth Anatomy that I was running.
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And we did about 20 episodes and we dropped that fairly quickly and it morphed into what
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everybody's listening to now. So I've got to thank you from the bottom of my heart. And I hope the guys
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that are listening as well, thank you for being my first coach when it comes to this online world and
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universe. Dude, I think that's awesome. And the fact you actually paid me to be a coach is actually
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funny to me. Like you paid me. Are you sure? I paid you. And you said that I was one of your very
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first like paid coaching clients, if I remember correctly. That's awesome. So you were experimenting
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on me, but it worked. So congratulations. That's awesome, dude. Jeff, I want to talk with you about
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money. You know, I'm a financial advisor, you're a financial advisor, and this is a huge issue for a lot of
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men. And I think it's something that's very important that we address. And I know a lot of
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the guys have questions. Tell me a little bit about how you even got into this universe of being a
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financial advisor and wrapping your head around money. And of course, what you're doing now with
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good financial sense. Yeah. So my money journey really just begins after I became a financial
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advisor. And that was not like some career path, right? I was born. I went through grade school and
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high school where I knew I was going to become a financial planner. The truth is, is that I stumbled upon
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becoming a finance major just because I knew I was going to be a business major, didn't know like
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which specialization end up into finance, really just by chance. And even there, I had aspirations of
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doing the whole corporate thing. I was going to move to the big city, get a big corporate job.
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And then this goes back in 2001. So this dates me a little bit, but this is right after the dotcom
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bubble burst. And similar to like 2008, the job market was just horrible. And I thought I had this
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job lined up, ended up falling through and I really had nothing else out there. But at the time I was
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a junior broker at a local investment firm. I'm sorry, I was an intern at a... Not even that high
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yet. Yeah, no, no. I was a non-paid intern. And that turned into me making a good impression. They
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offered me a job as a junior broker. And initially I declined it because I just thought I was too young.
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I didn't really understand what it meant to be a broker, a financial advisor. And like I said,
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I still had aspirations of going to the city and doing the whole corporate thing. Well,
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when the corporate thing was non-existent, I basically just said yes, because there's nothing
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else to do. And when I agreed to that position, I didn't really know what it meant to be a financial
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advisor. I had no idea what that meant because my parents didn't invest. I didn't have any specific
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money lessons or they didn't show me how to buy a stock, a mutual fund or open up a Roth IRA.
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So I went into a completely blind. And then as I started meeting with people, and most of these
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people were at least twice my age, three times my age. Keep in mind, I was about 23 at the time.
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I started to learn a lot. And when I started meeting with people that either did a really good
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job saving for retirement and the ones that didn't, I was able to then look back at my father,
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specifically my father and how he did financially. And I started to see why he had struggled his
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entire life and why he never had taught me about investing and stocks and the stock market because
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he didn't, he didn't himself because he didn't know. And I was able to also see, now the one thing
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about my dad, like I love my dad. My dad gave me all the love and affection you could ever expect
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from a father that you'd ever hope to have from a father. Now, the only thing that he never did,
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like he never took me camping, never showed me how to change the oil or doing any manly things like
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that. But then again, I mean, he, he was there for me. He attended all my sporting events. You
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know, he just, he, he showered me with love and I'm grateful for that. But when it came to specific
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financial lessons, you know, uh, financial, uh, advice to the years, one of the first pieces of
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advice he ever gave me financially wise was he told me to open a credit card. Now, most of you
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listening like, Oh, is that really that bad? You know, you're trying to build your credit,
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you know, trying to get your foot in the door financially. Well, he told me to open up a
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credit card because there was something that I wanted. And I don't even remember what it was.
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Yeah. Like, I don't even know what it was, but it was something that I didn't need.
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And he told me to open a credit card so I could go buy whatever this thing was. And unfortunately,
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I listened. Yep. Now keep in mind that this, the person, my father who gave me this,
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this advice was the same guy who filed bankruptcy, not once, but twice. And even, um, to his last day
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before he passed away, he was taking out cash advances on one credit card to make the minimum
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payment on others. Wow. Yeah. And this is all this stuff. For some reason, I didn't see this
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like when I was in high school or in college, but when I started meeting with others, you know,
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about their financial situation, I was, I was able to see finally my father for who he was,
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at least when it came to his, his money and his money situations. So it was really that just seeing
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that, like finally seeing my father for who he was and never being able to really call him out,
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like the way that I thought he needed. I get something to say, I still regret because I was
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a financial advisor and yet I couldn't give my own father financial advice, but I don't know,
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kind of felt maybe that wasn't my place. I don't know. Like I still wrestle with that,
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but what that has gave me is the inspiration and motivation I needed to help others, you know,
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and that came to helping others, you know, when they became clients of the financial planning practice
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that also morphed into good financial sense, the blog, and just a lot of the,
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the inspiration, motivation to what you see on the site.
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I want to go back. You said like, he didn't teach you that much about money,
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not hardly anything and anything that he did teach you maybe sounded a little bit destructive,
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but I think this is a trend and I'm, I'm curious as to why more parents don't talk with their
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And I, I wish I knew the answer because I, and I'm like most, even my mom, I mean, they,
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so they, they split up when I was young, but they both told me, oh, you need to save like,
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Right. And that is like the most generic bogus advice that any parent can ever give to their kid
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because that doesn't mean anything to me. Yeah. How do you, what does that even mean?
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What does that mean? Like save how, like save as like a savings account, save like as an investment
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account, like in a Roth IRA or show me like, what is, what's the importance of saving? And the reality
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is that the reason they couldn't give me that is because neither one of them had did it for themselves.
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Right. Right. I do as I say, not as I do kind of thing.
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Correct. And I think that's the hardest thing. And you know, something that I've tried to buck
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the trend with, and I feel like I'm even kind of late in the game. So, you know, I've got four
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children, uh, three boys and a younger girl that we just adopted. And our oldest son is nine.
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And just this past year I took him and yes, I went to a brick and mortar, just a local bank. And we
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opened up our first savings account together. And yes, it's a savings account. Yes. He's making 0.01%
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interest. And yes, I could have went online and did it that way. But I wanted that experience of
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going somewhere with him to the bank together just so that we had that time. So he could ask me
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questions about the whole experience. And it's exactly what I hoped it would be. You know, he had
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all these questions about how banks make money and, and why he should save and all this stuff. And
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I'm not sure he quite understood the importance of saving yet. Of course. Right.
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But it's at least planting that seed. And that's what I want to do. And my six year old, my, my middle
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son was asking questions like, well, when do I get to go open my first savings account? So like,
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I know that, uh, I'm probably going to move it up for him so that he can get it started earlier.
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And then when my son turns 10, then we're actually going to open our first, he's going to buy his
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first stock and we're going to do that together. Very cool. I think these are the little things that
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you have to do as a man, as a father with your kids, because if you don't teach them, then we,
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you know, many of us already know, you're not going to learn this in school. You know, I was a
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finance major in college. And when I got done, I didn't know how to invest. I didn't know how to
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open a Roth IRA or to, you know, how to invest in my 401k. And I just think that's, and I was the
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finance major. So how everybody else that's college, you know, like if I'm not getting taught that
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stuff, then I know nobody else is. Yeah. But I think you brought up a good point. You hit the nail on
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the head when you said, you know, the do as I say, not as I do in the fact that we would love to teach
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our kids this, except for we don't really even know it for ourselves. And one of the things that
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you had said is that you didn't even know what a financial advisor was. And I think there is a lot
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of confusion about that term, even financial advisor. Why is that so confusing for people?
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Yeah. I think the term financial advisor, financial planner, I think most people, when I talk to them,
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they think, Oh, so you just helped me pick stocks or you helped me pick investments.
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And that's a part of it. I mean, I will say that I don't help anybody pick stocks. Like we don't
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actually pick individual stocks, but I think the main thing that I do as a financial advisor,
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financial planner is just help people make smart decisions with their money. And that's
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taking a portion and putting that into their 401k and, or they have some sort of retirement plan at
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work and helping them choose the investments that they have in that 401k. Or if they don't have a 401k,
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we're opening up something like a Roth IRA, some, some sort of individual retirement account,
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maybe that's buying life insurance, or if they have children, helping them open up a college
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savings plan and just making sure that whatever money that they make, it's putting to use towards
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something that's either going to be for them a benefit now or the benefit down the road.
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And I think the biggest mistake, I don't say mistake, but the biggest misunderstanding,
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the biggest misconception that I think almost everybody has is that they don't understand
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why they have to save, why they have to invest for the future. And it's, and it's hard to comprehend.
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I get it. Like when you, the idea of like, why do I need to put away a hundred dollars a month
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into a mutual fund? You know, like you try to explain that to a 20 year old, 25 year old,
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even sometimes a 35 year old, it's like, they don't get it because it's hard to see what that
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can grow to be. And the fact is if you don't do that, and now you wake up 20, 30 years from now,
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and you haven't saved anything. And now all you have is social security. If that's even there for
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you, then how are you going to, how are you going to live? Like, how are you actually going to retire?
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Those are the things I think is hard for people to comprehend and digest because it's so,
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we, we are so in the now, like, what do I need right now? What do I, you know,
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we want instant gratification. Like, it's just like, we want to go to Amazon. We want to buy now
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and one click payment checkout. Boom. It, we have a drone delivering it to us, you know, like in a few
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hours. And when it comes to saving for retirement and investing for the future, I mean, there is no
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immediate gratification we're talking about. You're going to have to wait to really enjoy the fruits
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of your labor like 30 years from now. Right. It just doesn't sound, yeah, it's not immediate
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gratification. It's not fun. It's almost like I'm putting this away and it's not even really mine. I'm
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putting it somewhere that I don't really have access or control or I will be able to get.
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And I can't even enjoy this hard earned money. Right. It sucks. It's not sexy. It's boring.
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It's like, ah, who needs to do that? Like, I want to, I want to live for the moment. I want to live for
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the now for those that really grasp what it means to have financial freedom. When you have financial
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freedom, that means that you are capable of doing what you want to do when you want to do it without
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having any strings attached. And it's hard to have that in the now. Like, you know, unless you win
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the lotto or you're some trust fund baby, like you're not going to have financial freedom now.
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It's something that you have to work towards. Right. If you're saving for the future and then you have
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this extra cash on hand because you've been investing, because you've been saving, because
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you've been investing in yourself, maybe five years from now, 10 years from now, if you're still stuck in
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a job that you absolutely hate, that just you're bored to tears with, and you just want to bang
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yourself against a cubicle wall. Well, if you haven't been saving for yourself, guess what?
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You're still stuck in that job because you don't, you can't go anywhere because you've been blowing on
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what your, your Amazon one click purchases and financial freedom is having that cash built up
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on hand to where, you know what, if that job sucks and you want to go do the Appalachian trail for a
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year and take a sabbatical, guess what? You have the cash to do it now because you've been saving for that.
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Right. And then almost like a, uh, we would call it like a walkaway fund or even an integrity fund
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where it allows you to live in integrity and do what you want to do and live the life that you
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want to live because you're not beholden to somebody else to make sure that you're putting
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food on the table or roof over your head. I've never heard it referred like that, but I absolutely
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love it. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So let's talk about some practicalities of this because I think guys,
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you know, they understand, okay, I need some financial advice. I need, I know I need help. I know I need
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to do this to some degree or another. Like where do we start? I mean, obviously education,
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but what are we educating ourselves on? Do we hire a financial advisor? Like where's the best place to
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start? Yeah. I think when it comes at the very beginning, I mean, maybe meeting with a financial
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coach, financial planner at the beginning, and maybe you just pay them hourly just to kind of get you
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started. But I don't know. I just don't think that for younger people, I don't think you actually
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need a financial planner ongoing unless you just have, unless you just know yourself and you'll never save
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and invest for yourself. If you need some sort of accountability partner, you know, then that's,
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you know, that's something to be said. But I think, you know, the first rule that most people don't
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realize is that I'm not sure what you tell people, but I talked to a lot of people that they say that
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they're saving for themselves or saving for retirement. And I ask them, okay, well, how much
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are you saving? Like, oh, I'm saving like 4% or 5%. And the reality is like, you're not even close.
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Yeah. Like you're not even the ballpark and you hear 10%, you hear 20%. And the reality is that if
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you're not 20% to 30% of your take-home income, unless you just want to keep working at the same
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job that you're working at for the rest of your life, then that's basically what's going to happen.
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Or whenever you say that you want to call it quits, it ain't going to happen. If you're only saving
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10%, 20%. 20%, I feel is like is the bare minimum, which usually scares the bejesus out of most people.
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Right. Because they're not there. They don't, they can't even fathom that. And nobody's telling them
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that. And no one's even close to that. And I'm not telling you that you have to go from
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0%, 5% to 20% tomorrow. But that's something that you, in reality, like that's what people need to
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hear and need to work towards. And that means now what do you do with that money? You know,
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I think initially that's just building up, maybe it's just like you said, going to your integrity
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fund, some sort of savings account to where you're just not going to spend it. You're going to save it
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and use it for emergencies. From there, I think we start investing for ourselves. You know, maybe that's
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opening an investment account. I personally love the Roth IRA just as a, for a tax-free retirement. If you
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have a 401k at your job, but these are just different tools that you can utilize to start
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putting away for yourself. Yeah. I like that you talk about the Roth IRA. I mean, obviously that's
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a great vehicle and it's one, because I know your story just in our conversations and the friendship
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that we've developed, you actually started a Roth IRA movement, which was a lot of this. And I don't
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want to get too much into that because I think that's morphed into something even greater, which is
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the money uprising movement, right? Yeah. The Roth IRA was the beginning and, and just really touch upon
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that because I want to tell just a quick story on that was I went to go speak at my alma mater. I was
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talking to a, a, one of those, uh, lecture halls. We had 60, I want to say 60 to 70 soon to be
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graduating college seniors that were from different majors. So they were, I think some were business,
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but they're from all over. And I just started talking and I was, I brought, I was brought in to
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talk to them about investing and saving for the future. And I brought up the Roth IRA and quickly,
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I just said, just a quick show of hands. How many of you here know what the Roth IRA is?
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Not a single one of them raised their hand. Really? And I've been talking for about 10 minutes
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at that point. And I remember thinking, okay, well maybe they just were not paying attention.
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They were definitely tuned out, right? They already tuned out. So I said, okay,
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in case you didn't hear that last question, I'm going to ask it one more time. How many of you here
00:19:55.940
have heard of the Roth IRA? I'm not asking you to give me a dissertation or, you know, define a
00:20:00.980
Wikipedia definition of what the Roth IRA is. I just want to know if you've heard of it.
00:20:04.780
Once again, not a single person raised their hand. And I just thought these are young men and women
00:20:11.160
that are getting ready to join the workforce. And if they don't know what a Roth IRA is, I promise
00:20:15.840
you, they don't really know how, what a mutual fund is. They don't know how to invest if they have a
00:20:19.040
401k. And like, these are all the things that they're going to have to be dealing with like in
00:20:22.920
the next year. So that kind of like morphed into the money uprising movement, which I think it really
00:20:28.660
is just the general, for me, the money uprising movement is so many people are just oblivious,
00:20:37.000
are complacent to their financial situation as if somebody else is going to take care of it for
00:20:43.540
them. And all the money uprising movement, really what that stands for is that I'm going to take
00:20:49.240
charge of my own financial life. I'm going to go out there and I'm going to do the research. No one
00:20:54.080
else is going to do it for me. I'm going to take charge, step up, own it. And I'm going to start
00:20:58.320
implementing what I need to, so I can be financially successful.
00:21:03.240
Gentlemen, let me take a quick break to introduce you to our exclusive mastermind,
00:21:07.100
the Iron Council. This is a group of men who are doing all that is required to see big results in
00:21:12.400
their life. So whether you're dealing with major life setbacks or simply feel like you're stuck in a
00:21:16.620
rut, the Iron Council has proven to be a place where these guys can gain new perspectives,
00:21:21.660
new insights, new tools to get them to the next level. So if you're trying to build more wealth
00:21:26.380
or get a job promotion, lose that spare tire, pick up that woman, connect with your wife,
00:21:31.120
spend time with your kids, put a little extra money in the bank account, or you want to reclaim
00:21:35.200
your life. You feel like it's gotten away from you. The tools and the guidance and the direction
00:21:38.980
that you're going to receive inside the Iron Council is exactly what you will need to experience the
00:21:44.840
results that you're after. And on top of all that, you're going to have all of the accountability
00:21:48.480
with me and the other 260 men inside the Iron Council to keep you on track with the objectives
00:21:54.220
you've identified for yourself. So if you're interested in learning more and interested in
00:21:58.000
joining us, you can do that at orderman.com slash Iron Council. Now let me get back to my conversation
00:22:03.500
with Jeff. I know one of the things that a lot of people are going to ask, and I've even asked this
00:22:09.840
myself is we have so much going on, right? I mean, we've got businesses and we've got wives and we've
00:22:15.240
got kids and we've got coaching and you've got four kids. I've got four kids. Like life is crazy.
00:22:20.820
And sometimes I think that this stuff can be very overwhelming. Talk to me about the time
00:22:26.560
requirements and how somebody would incorporate this or even take it to the next level if they've
00:22:30.780
already started the foundation of building their finances. So somebody that tells me they don't
00:22:35.920
have enough time, I call BS. Because I'm going to say, okay, do you have the Walking Dead DVR'd
00:22:43.840
on your TV? When's the last time that you binge watched any show on Netflix? How much time do
00:22:49.760
you spend going on a vacation or doing research on whatever? It's like we all have the time, right?
00:22:55.680
It's just a matter of do you want to make it a priority? And the reality is that if you don't
00:22:59.880
make it the priority and you want to continue living a financially boring and unfulfilling life,
00:23:07.480
then that's what's going to happen. And it's just like any successful business owner,
00:23:11.540
any successful entrepreneur, like for them to say, I just don't have enough time to start my
00:23:15.440
business. Like you really, yeah. Like I'm sure that's what Mark Zuckerberg said. I don't have
00:23:19.580
time to start Facebook. That's right. Yeah. Right. You know, it's like, it's just the matter if you
00:23:23.560
want to make it a priority. As far as how much time it takes, I think that's the matter of,
00:23:28.360
is this something that you get that you are excited about or you have an interest in? If you don't,
00:23:33.640
then it's going to take you more time. Or like you mentioned earlier, you know, the fact that you
00:23:37.460
want to start a podcast, you didn't know how, so you hired myself to help you out. So you found the
00:23:42.560
professional and that's where the financial advisor, financial planner comes into play,
00:23:45.520
that they're going to weed out all those extra hours of trying to figure it out yourself. And they
00:23:50.380
should give you a game plan of what to do and how to do it.
00:23:53.740
Yeah. Yeah. No, this is great. This is great. So, you know, I'm really, I'm really fascinated by
00:23:57.740
some of the, your rules. Cause you wrote out 12 rules when it comes to the money uprising
00:24:00.860
movement. And I want to go through a couple of them. And I know I'm listening or looking at a lot
00:24:05.100
of these and they're definitely military influence because I know you spent time in Iraq, you were in
00:24:09.400
the army. And so I look at these like blue Falcon, we got to talk about that one for sure. So I'm just
00:24:14.080
going to jump to number 10 because that's the intriguing one to me. And I'm sure the guys will
00:24:17.520
understand when they hear about it. So talk to me about what that even means, where that term comes
00:24:21.860
from and then how we maybe avoid this in our own lives. Yeah. So the blue Falcon, this was introduced
00:24:27.880
to me in basic training. Uh, this could be also, are you, do you, I'm sorry, do you cuss on your podcast?
00:24:33.060
I don't want to like, no, go ahead. You're fine. We're guys, you know, it's like, I try to keep
00:24:37.540
it clean, but you know, sometimes the word slips out just how it works. You know, as a Christian
00:24:41.800
guy, I always try to like, you know, make sure that I don't cuss, like, unless it's like kind
00:24:45.400
of military stuff where it's just more or less, you know, it just kind of happened. So blue Falcon,
00:24:49.740
Bravo Foxtrot or buddy fucker, those three terms all used anonymously. But basically the blue Falcon
00:24:55.300
was the guy or gal who was going to screw the platoon, your company, whatever, just because they
00:25:02.160
wanted to do it their way. And I can think like in basic training was like, it'd be like the guy
00:25:06.460
in your platoon that didn't want to shine his boots because he was tired or the guy that, you know,
00:25:10.660
ate dessert when he wasn't supposed to. So he was the blue Falcon. So he was the reason,
00:25:15.380
or if you think of full metal jacket, you know, private pile, you know, at he was the, he is the
00:25:20.420
prime blue Falcon. So these are people that they don't care about you. They don't care about what
00:25:25.140
you're trying to achieve. They don't care what's passionate to you. You know, they just care about
00:25:29.220
them. And when it came to like blue Falcons and you can apply this, not just in your life
00:25:33.380
financially, but across the board, but you know, for those that are trying to get out of debt
00:25:38.940
and you know, that you spend too much on your credit cards, or you know, that, you know,
00:25:43.900
that you just can't tell yourself no. And you're hanging out with buddies that are wanting you to
00:25:48.760
go and buy stuff or take trips or, Oh yeah, we need to go do this. And we're going to, then we're
00:25:53.040
going to go, you know, to the bar after here. And then we're going to go out to eat dinner and all
00:25:55.980
this stuff. And, you know, we're just going to charge stuff on our credit cards. Like these are
00:25:59.520
the people that you have to recognize that like, they don't care like what your goals are. They
00:26:02.440
don't care what you're trying to achieve. And these are the people that you have to either cut ties off
00:26:08.660
with, or just realize that you've got to put up just some boundaries with these people. You know,
00:26:14.140
I think in my own life, I mean, they're, I just had buddies that, I mean, they like to party,
00:26:18.900
like to have a good time, but I also knew that they were taking out student loans and that's how they
00:26:22.360
were funding, you know, their, their time in college and it was fun in college. But as I
00:26:26.940
started realizing, like, this is not me anymore, like this is not who I want to be. You know, I
00:26:31.140
just had to cut off some of those relationships and it can be hard at times. Uh, it was hard,
00:26:35.600
but then you realize, listen, like that's their life and they're going nowhere. And if that's the
00:26:40.860
same path that you want to go down, that's fine. That's your choice. But if you realize that you want
00:26:44.740
more out of your life, then that's how you're going to cut out the blue Falcons out of your life.
00:26:47.940
Right. Yeah. And I, I think you hit it on the head when you say, you know, just,
00:26:50.280
just being deliberate and intentional and knowing what you want. And these guys, most of the time,
00:26:54.120
these guys, these even toxic people, when it comes to relationship or whatever area of life,
00:26:57.660
like you mentioned, they don't know what they want and they're going by default and you can go
00:27:01.460
along for that ride. Or you can be a little bit more deliberate and intentional and figure out
00:27:04.900
what you want and figure out who's going to help you get there and who isn't right. And eliminate
00:27:08.940
those people from your lives. I get that. I understand that. Then I guess the reverse of that would be
00:27:13.220
the concept of a battle buddy. Right. And, and that's definitely one of your principles as well. And
00:27:17.980
something that we talk about within our mastermind, the iron council,
00:27:20.280
talk to me about what a battle buddy is and how to incorporate something like this in your financial
00:27:24.500
life. Yeah. The battle buddy concept is something, another powerful concept. So like you said,
00:27:30.360
complete opposite of the blue Falcon, the battle buddy, these are the guys and or gals for me,
00:27:35.240
it was all guys. I was the infantry where I had one battle buddy in basic training, this guy,
00:27:40.560
Romero, he had to know, and vice versa, I had to know everything about him. I had to know his favorite
00:27:46.880
fruit, his favorite foods. I didn't know the names of his sister or siblings. If he had one,
00:27:51.700
he had a sister. I didn't know when he lost his virginity. I didn't know everything about him.
00:27:55.880
In the same token, I was responsible and vice versa for him in the event that if he didn't shine his
00:28:01.860
boots, guess what? I had to do pushups. You know, if he didn't have his bunk squared away,
00:28:06.400
if he didn't have his wall locker squared away, you know, if he didn't have his canteen filled and we
00:28:11.100
had to know everything about this person and we had to just be held accountable for them.
00:28:15.960
And that's such a huge, huge thing. And in my life, you know, just recognizing who are these
00:28:21.580
people, who are these battle buddies that I need that are going to be there and not just to pick
00:28:26.680
us up when we're down, but I think even more importantly, that they're willing to call us out
00:28:31.720
when we need to hear it and when we don't want to hear it. The story I always share with people is
00:28:37.080
that my girlfriend, who is now my wife, this was, um, I was a financial advisor, but I wasn't making
00:28:43.740
any money yet. I was barely getting by. I still had student loan debt and some credit card debt.
00:28:49.300
Yes. And this is when flat screen TVs just came out when the 42 inch flat screen was like,
00:28:55.520
and I'm sure you got some guys listening. They're like, wait, what? I thought those have been out
00:28:58.720
forever. So this was like, this is when the 42 inch was like the one to have. I wanted one because I
00:29:05.600
still had the 36 inch boob tube. It was like, you know, three feet deep. Of course. And I was
00:29:09.840
going to go to Best Buy and I was going to put on my, uh, actually I was going to open up a new
00:29:13.100
credit card since they had 0% interest. And I remember my girlfriend, now wife at the time,
00:29:17.400
she calmly said, do you think that you could afford that right now? And I remember when she said that
00:29:22.660
to me, I thought you woman, how do you, what are you, you don't know, you don't know me. What are you
00:29:27.700
talking about? Like I didn't, I didn't say any of this, but I just remember a feeling internally
00:29:32.320
like, how dare you? Yeah. How dare you ruin my dream? And I don't remember what was said after
00:29:38.300
that. I think I just kind of thought about it and just didn't really, I knew that if I started
00:29:42.040
talking about it, I was going to get upset. Anyway, I sat on it for 24 hours and I realized
00:29:46.460
she was right. She was totally right. I couldn't afford it. I didn't, yeah, I could have make the
00:29:51.740
payment, but I still had debt that I was still paying off. I didn't have enough money to, I just,
00:29:56.180
I couldn't afford it. And it was something I didn't want to hear, but it's something I absolutely
00:29:59.660
needed to hear. And that was the time, like I recognize, you know, she's my battle buddy. You
00:30:03.320
know, she cares about me. She didn't want to feed me the lines, like just to make me, just to say
00:30:08.180
things to make me feel good. She said what exactly what I needed to hear. And that's what a battle
00:30:12.660
buddy does. Right. Right. I guess this leads me into one of the discussions I wanted to have with
00:30:17.020
you because I know you have another project that you're working on, which is marriage more and the
00:30:21.380
ability to communicate and connect with your wife in a meaningful way. But I think this is a major
00:30:26.000
hurdle when it comes to a partner and a spouse trying to get on the same page when it comes to
00:30:32.500
money. Is there any tips that you have and suggestions for making sure you and your wife
00:30:37.420
are on the same page? Million dollar question. Yeah. So your listeners know. So my wife and I,
00:30:43.080
we just celebrated our 12 year anniversary. Congratulations by the way. Thank you. We do
00:30:47.960
have a marriage podcast that does not mean by any stretch that we are, we consider ourselves to be
00:30:53.540
marriage experts. We have gone to counseling, I would say at least five or six times. When you
00:30:59.720
have four kids, when you've gone through a deployment, when you've got different businesses
00:31:03.040
like myself, when you have two complete opposite ends of the spectrum, I mean, it takes work. It
00:31:07.760
takes a lot of work. Yeah, definitely. And I just want your men to hear that because when I see when
00:31:12.780
guys say, and I've seen women say this, like, oh, it just takes too much work. I can't make this,
00:31:17.300
I can't make it work. Like you're getting, that's, that's bullshit. You know, that's when you say it
00:31:22.820
takes too much work. Guess what, boys? Like, that's what marriage is all about. It takes work. It's
00:31:26.180
not meant to be easy. You know, yes, there's some days or some seasons where things are just clicking
00:31:30.360
and it works out great. Other seasons, guess what? You got to roll up your sleeves and you got to get
00:31:34.080
through it. You got to put in the work, but sorry, had to go on a quick tangent there. You're right.
00:31:38.160
I mean, it's right on something I certainly agree with. So one of the things that my wife and I,
00:31:42.900
we benefited from, which is, it's kind of funny when you think about it. So we actually quote
00:31:48.200
unquote eloped in November. And then the following January is whenever I was deployed to Iraq.
00:31:54.920
Oh my goodness. Yeah. I was gone for 17 months. So from January up to about April of the following
00:32:00.600
year, we saw each other. We had a two week leave in November and that was it. So that first year,
00:32:07.000
almost year and a half that we got married, we were separated. Maybe that's why we made it that first
00:32:11.920
year. But, uh, well, coming back to a different story because I left after six months of being
00:32:16.080
married and getting back was the difficult thing. Yes. And actually that's, that's our first bout
00:32:20.760
of counseling. That's when it almost, we almost didn't make it. Um, and that's a whole other story,
00:32:24.940
but, but when it came to, while I was gone, one of the benefits that we had was the only thing that
00:32:30.400
we could talk about while I was deployed, cause I couldn't tell her what I was doing. I could,
00:32:34.480
you know, all the, all our missions, like that was all sensitive information. So the only thing that
00:32:38.340
we could really talk about was either what she did with her day or what we were going to do together
00:32:43.300
whenever I got back. So a lot of that first year we spent talking about different goals that we had
00:32:49.680
different financial goals. And I remember like one of the first goals we had to kind of look at going
00:32:54.320
back to the whole Dave Ramsey. He talks about having your $1,000 in your emergency fund. Like
00:32:59.140
before I left, I had $500 in my savings account. Actually, no, I'm sorry. I had $500 in my checking
00:33:05.400
account. I didn't even have a savings account before I left Iraq. So, you know, we just started
00:33:09.920
talking about goals. And so that, our first goal was get to a thousand, then it was to get to 2000.
00:33:13.980
And this was just in pure savings. And then it was to max out our Roth IRAs. And then it was like,
00:33:19.580
you know, to pay off our debt. So we had all these goals that we started working towards and yeah,
00:33:24.200
it stuck being deployed and, you know, being separated, but that really just set the stage on us talking
00:33:29.840
about things that we wanted to accomplish and more importantly, accomplish together.
00:33:35.500
And I think that also too, is that if you know my wife and I, so we are complete opposites. I'm
00:33:40.080
what I would call the dreamer, the big thinker. She calls herself the realist. I would say the
00:33:45.220
pessimist. She's the one that always brings me down to earth, but it's also needed. You know,
00:33:50.820
that's why she's also my battle buddy. So when I have these big aspirations, I'm like, oh, like we're
00:33:55.020
going to max out both the Roth IRAs and we're going to put $10,000 into this. She's like, how are you
00:34:01.120
going to do that again? Can you kind of show me the math on how that's going to make it work?
00:34:05.960
So what I think that also did was help me and help her learn how to compromise. I think that's such
00:34:13.000
an important thing. And I'm not talking about waving up the white flag and giving into what
00:34:16.220
your dreams are, but you know, when you're married and you have a spouse, like guess what? They have
00:34:20.120
goals too. They have dreams too. And their vote matters. And I don't care if you're like the sole
00:34:24.840
provider. If, if you have a wife that she's a stay at home mom and you're the one working,
00:34:29.300
she still gets a vote and it's an equal vote. Yeah. And that's the other thing I hate when I
00:34:33.880
that, you know, the husbands try to control all the finances and all the money issues. Like
00:34:37.820
this has to be done together as a team. So I think it's just a matter of sitting down and like
00:34:42.700
figuring out what is important to each of you. You know, you can make your list, she can make her list
00:34:48.960
and then just compare notes because you know, if you have aspirations of going on this wild
00:34:55.400
hunting trip or, you know, buying like some just cool camping gear, but yet you've got $10,000 of
00:35:00.640
credit card debt and she wants to make sure that all the debts paid off, you know, that's how you
00:35:04.660
compromise, you know, like it's just having those conversations. And I think most people, they just
00:35:08.300
don't do it. They don't have these conversations. Do you guys have any type of ongoing meeting, whether
00:35:13.340
that's every month or every week? Do you have something like that, that you guys do regarding
00:35:16.840
specifically finances? Yeah, we, we don't now, but we used to a lot in the beginning. And I say we
00:35:23.100
don't now because I mentioned about being financial free. Like we feel like we, you know, we've reached
00:35:27.040
that state of being financially free, but in the beginning, so my wife is always, I hate budgeting,
00:35:32.800
but she, that was her. So she would actually budget. The ironic thing of our relationship is that
00:35:37.640
she's actually the CFO of the family, the chief financial officer, you know, so she did all the
00:35:43.260
budgeting. She handled like paying the bills. And that's something that, that she enjoyed because,
00:35:47.860
you know, I, I'm the chief investment officer. I'm the CIO. So I handled all the investing, but,
00:35:52.700
you know, she would do all the finances and it would just help us. So we would always review,
00:35:58.180
not only say monthly, but I say every few months. But the one thing that we did do and kind of bring
00:36:02.720
back the military into this is that we would have what I would call it tactical budgeting sessions.
00:36:07.460
So what that looked like was anytime that we had some sort of life event that we were going through,
00:36:13.940
and that was either having a child, building our home, her leaving her job, me starting a business,
00:36:20.160
like anything, anytime that we had a major life event, that's when we would sit down and do some
00:36:25.400
tactical budgeting in the sense of, okay, let's take a really hard look at where we're at just to see
00:36:30.320
like, okay, can we afford this? What are we missing? You know, we just, we would, we would deep dive
00:36:35.240
into where we were spending our money and that would just help put us both on the same page.
00:36:39.480
Yeah. I like that. Is that, is that concept of the, uh, the tactical budgeting session? Is that
00:36:43.640
in your book? Cause I know the book's been out for a while, Soldier of Finance. Is that in there?
00:36:47.580
Cause I know it's got some, a lot of great tips in there and it's been a while since I've read it,
00:36:50.840
but, uh, what else is, is in there that we might find that would be valuable?
00:36:54.580
Yeah. So, uh, that is in the book, Soldier of Finance. Thanks for, uh, plugging that by the way.
00:36:58.660
No, of course it's a great book. And I read it. Well, I think it's probably been out for
00:37:03.020
Oh, believe it or not. It actually came out in August of 2013.
00:37:06.440
Did it really? Oh my gosh. Okay. Yeah. So it's been a lot longer than that.
00:37:09.240
No, but I mean, the cool thing is like a lot of the stuff that I talk about there still applies.
00:37:12.860
And even if you're not in the military, I mean, I think any man would get something out of it.
00:37:16.440
Uh, I think that's just the biggest takeaways I want people to get out of that book is that
00:37:19.780
it doesn't matter where you're at in your financial life. And I think this goes back to,
00:37:23.900
uh, you mentioned the money uprising movement, you know, going back to rule number one is that
00:37:27.860
it's never too late to get started. You know, I don't care if you're 25,
00:37:31.420
you're 35, you're 45. It's never too late to get started. And that's what I really kind of
00:37:35.920
highlight in the book because, you know, I've mentioned, I've kind of alluded to this a little
00:37:39.760
bit, but my father had credit card debt. I had credit card debt. I ended up opening the credit
00:37:44.340
card, you know, whenever he told me to, I did. Yeah. I ended up taking out student loans,
00:37:48.180
my junior and senior year of college when I had my schooling paid for, because I was in,
00:37:52.880
You know, I graduated college with like over $30,000 of debt when I didn't, I should have
00:37:57.840
had any debt whatsoever. And these are the things I had to, to work, work through some of these big
00:38:03.680
mistakes I had to work through and to get to where I'm at today. And I think that's why I just want
00:38:07.880
to remind people that it doesn't matter where you're at in your financial life. As long as you
00:38:11.740
decide to take action and to do something about it, then you can overcome it. But you've got to make
00:38:17.060
that choice. You have to make that choice. I love it, man. Obviously we're scratching the surface
00:38:21.180
on this. I know you've got 12 different rules when it comes to the money uprising movement.
00:38:24.520
And so guys, if you're listening to this, just, just go check out the site and that way you can
00:38:27.740
learn those 12 rules, get the book. I mean, anything that Jeff is doing, I can attest that
00:38:31.200
this is powerful stuff because obviously it's, it's helped me and improve my life. So Jeff,
00:38:36.020
as we wind things down, I want to ask you a couple of questions. The first question I want to ask is
00:38:39.960
what does it mean to be a man? So you kind of gave me that before we started. I gave you a little bit
00:38:44.980
of a warning. Sometimes it's not enough though, right? No, it's not. Cause I really started to think
00:38:48.860
about it. Then you started hitting me with 27 other questions, but you know, I think about
00:38:52.980
what it means to be a man, especially where I'm at right now in my life. I'm 38 years old. I've
00:38:58.800
been married to amazing wife of 12 years. We have four amazing children and it has been a battle.
00:39:06.320
I mean, it has a, it has been a battle to be able to say that. And I think about my role as a man,
00:39:11.940
specifically when it comes to my family. And when I think about it, to me, it means to step up and to be
00:39:17.640
that leader and specifically to be that spiritual leader that I feel that my family needs. And to my
00:39:23.880
wife, it means the man is to be there, to comfort her, to listen to her, to support her, to make sure
00:39:29.880
that my kids respect her the same way they respect me. When it comes to each of my kids and my daughter,
00:39:35.620
my boys and my daughter, it's to raise them not to be good kids, but to be good adults.
00:39:41.820
Hmm. Because what they learn now, and that's like, and we mentioned this earlier, you know,
00:39:47.920
it's not, it's not do as I, uh, don't do as I do, do as I say. No, I want you to do what I, as I do.
00:39:54.460
Like, I want to show them what it means to be a man, what it means to be a good husband, a good father,
00:39:59.740
and to be a good leader so that they, when they get older and they can realize that and appreciate
00:40:04.520
that and be like, yeah, my dad did that for me. You know, he was a man. He showed me how to do
00:40:09.120
these things. Um, he wasn't an absent father. So I think that's something that I just has really
00:40:14.480
taken stock with me. Uh, you know, some of the things where my dad gave me a lot, but I know
00:40:18.580
there's some areas that he was, he came up short, you know, I don't fault him for that because I'm
00:40:22.900
chances are he probably wasn't shown that. I'm just thankful that I've had some really good mentors
00:40:27.240
in my life that have been able to reveal these things in my own life where I can step up and to be
00:40:32.520
a better man. Right on, man. Powerful stuff. And I agree with everything you just said. So if somebody's
00:40:37.040
listening to this, they want to learn more about you, what you're doing with the marriage stuff,
00:40:40.200
with the financial stuff, how do we connect with you? Yeah, I'll give you two places to go. Uh,
00:40:43.820
the financial blog is good financial sense, C E N T S.com. And if you want to check out the
00:40:49.620
marriage more podcast and site, it's marriage more.com. Those are the two hubs right now.
00:40:54.200
Awesome. We'll make sure we link that up so that guys can check that out. Jeff, again,
00:40:56.780
I wanted to let you know, I appreciate you. Uh, like I said, we've known each other for a couple of
00:41:00.640
years now and you have been instrumental in my life with the financial stuff, with the starting of
00:41:04.620
order, man, all of this stuff. And I really appreciate you. And you're taking your time
00:41:08.860
out of your day to impart some of your wisdom. Thanks for coming on brother. No, thank you.
00:41:12.100
Appreciate it, man. I hope you enjoyed this conversation with Jeff Rose and you got some
00:41:17.820
valuable information as a financial advisor. I can tell you that this guy knows what he is talking
00:41:21.660
about and money is such a critical component of being better providers, which in turn makes us better
00:41:27.380
men. I highly, highly, highly recommend that you check out what he's doing and his work.
00:41:31.620
Uh, in the meantime, if you are a achieving man, a high achieving man and an ambitious man,
00:41:37.160
and you're interested in joining our exclusive mastermind, the iron council, I invite you to do
00:41:41.660
that. Again, we've got the tools, the questions, the answers, the guidance, the direction, the
00:41:45.960
resources, everything that you need to take your life to the next level. Most importantly,
00:41:50.140
and I talked about this earlier, the accountability, this is a place where you can go. It's going to help
00:41:55.120
you ensure that you stick to what you talk about sticking to. Uh, you can see what we're about
00:41:59.940
and you can join us at order of man.com slash iron council. I will look forward to talk with you
00:42:04.640
on Friday for our Friday field notes, but until then, men take action and become the men you were
00:42:09.580
meant to be. Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your
00:42:15.120
life and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.