114: The Ranger Way | Kris "Tanto" Paronto
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Summary
When you hear the words Benghazi, Libya you might think of the terrorist attack, the death of U.S. Ambassador Christopher Stevens, and the cover-up that followed. Today, Chris Tonto Paranto joins me to talk about what really happened that night, the importance of living your life to a code, how to incorporate battle rhythms into your life, and why every man must choose the hard right over the easy wrong.
Transcript
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When you hear the words Benghazi, Libya, you might think of the book and subsequent movie,
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13 Hours. You might think of the terrorist attack, the death of U.S. Ambassador Stevens,
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and the cover-up that followed. Today, Chris Tonto Peranto, a member of the CIA annexed
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security team that responded to the terrorist attack in Benghazi, joins me to talk about what
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really happened that night, the importance of living your life to a code, how to incorporate
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battle rhythms into your life, why every man must choose the hard right over the easy wrong,
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and how we can all, each and every one of us, live the Ranger way.
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You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.
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When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time, every time. You are not easily deterred,
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defeated, rugged, resilient, strong. This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will
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become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.
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Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Michler, and I am the host and the
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founder of this podcast, The Order of Men. Another exciting one for you today, off the
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heels of my interview with the one and only Ted Nugent last week. Guys, you are in for another
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good one today. But before I get into the discussion with an American hero, Chris Tonto Peranto,
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I want to welcome you to the best podcast available for men today. Each week, we are interviewing the
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best men this planet has to offer, extracting some of their stories, their lessons, their practical
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advice, all of the stuff they have to share and delivering them straight to you so you
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can improve your life. And this one, of course, is no different. But first, if you are looking
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for the links and the resources that Chris and I talk about during the show, including
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a link to Chris's new book, The Ranger Way, you can get those at orderofman.com slash
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114. Second, if you have not joined the conversation we're having about masculinity over on Facebook,
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check this out, guys. We just cracked 30,000 members. If you're interested in those
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discussions, you can do that at facebook.com slash groups slash order of man. And third,
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if you're looking for more than just talk, you want the accountability, the brotherhood,
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the skills, the resources that you need to take your life up a notch, you are going to
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be interested in our exclusive band of brothers, our brotherhood, the Iron Council. I'm going
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to tell you more about it during the break, but for now, you can get the details at orderofman.com
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slash Iron Council. And also, and this is going to be the last thing I'm going to mention
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before I get into the show today, we've got a live event. Some of you know this already
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coming up on August 12th, 2017 in Kansas city. I'm going to be there. Steven Mansfield is going
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to be there. It's going to be a great event. So if you want to learn more about that and
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get registered, you can do that at orderofman.com slash event. Now with all of that said and done
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and out of the way, let me get into my discussion with Chris. For those of you who may not know,
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he was a member of the CIA annex security team that responded to the terrorist attack in Benghazi,
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Libya on September 11th, 2012. Chris Tonto Paranto, as he is affectionately referred to has
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assisted in saving over 20 lives while fighting off terrorists for over 13 hours. And that's the
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book and the movie that I'm sure a lot of you guys are familiar with. Chris is a former army
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ranger, a private security contractor. He's deployed in South America, Central America,
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the Middle East, North America. The guy has been everywhere. And he's also worked with
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U.S. government's global response staff conducting what he calls low profile security
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in high threat environments. I'm sure a lot of you guys can connect the dots and understand what
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he's talking about there. He's done that throughout the world. And guys, I am honored to have the
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chance to talk with this true American hero today, Mr. Chris Paranto. Chris, what's going on,
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man? Thanks for joining me on the show today. Of course, Ryan. Thanks for having me. I appreciate
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it, man. Yeah, I know you're on the road and you've got a busy schedule with the book
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release. So I appreciate you squeezing us in. No, no worries. No worries. Always is somewhere.
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I think I got more sleep when I was deployed than I do now. Yes, it sounds like it. Thank you, bro.
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Yeah. Well, I know you've got the book launch, The Ranger Way. And so I guess we ought to lead this
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off when you talk about The Ranger Way. What are you referring to? And that'll give us the framework
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for the discussion today. To me, The Ranger Way is about leadership. And it's what I learned from my
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leaders when I was a Ranger Battalion. And then also, even unbeknownst to me, is learning that
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from my father and my mother as far as just doing the right thing. And, you know, there is a part,
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if you feel the scene 13 Hours, there's a, which I'm portrayed in, there's a scene where I do say,
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and it's not the movie, I do say this. And Michael Bay did a great job keeping the movies accurate in
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that two-hour time frame where I said, as long as I'm doing the right thing, God will take care of me.
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Well, that was from my parents. And that's essentially what, to me, The Ranger Way is. It's
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following what, you know, the Lord has put in front of you, but also knowing when to do the
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right thing. And if you're doing the right thing, that you'll be taken care of. Being not, I'm not
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saying financially or with, emotionally, yes, but not financially, not with the superficial things,
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just saying that spiritually you're going to be fine. And The Ranger Way gets into that too,
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gets into the faith. And also The Ranger Way is also about just being willing to sacrifice,
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yourself for others, and the selfless service. And that's essential if you want to become a good
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leader. And that's what I saw growing up within The Ranger Battalion, but also just growing up in
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general. So I guess you could say that me going into Ranger Battalion was the right fit, because
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little did my parents know that's what they were raising, was a person to go into The Ranger Battalion,
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Ranger Regiment, and be able to not only follow orders, but be able to take orders. And then also,
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as exemplified in not just Benghazi, Libya, but in the 10 years of me deploying prior to that,
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that was willing to put my life down for others. And to me, that's The Ranger Way. It's always putting
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others before yourself. You read that in the Bible quite a bit a lot, is the ultimate sacrifice of
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who gave us the ultimate sacrifice of Jesus, so to forgive our sins. And that's how everybody should
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live their lives. And that's what The Ranger Way is about.
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Well, and I know John 15, 13 is a big verse for you, which is basically what you're talking about
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now, basically laying down your life for another man.
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Yep. Love is no greatness that a man lay down his life for his friend. And I know different
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versions of the Bible have different versions of that, but that's how I read it. And that's how
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the military is everywhere. Even if you go to Texas A&M and you go to the Corps of Cadets,
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which is, if you ever get a chance to go to Texas A&M and just see that facility there,
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it's beautiful. They even have that on outside on their monikers, John 15, 13. So even at that early
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age of before going in the military, they are already being prepped to learn that, hey,
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you need to put others before yourself. If there's a gunfight, and this is literally literal sense,
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if there's a gunfight, you better go towards that gunfire so your buddies are safe. And I loved
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seeing that when I got to speak at Texas A&M and seeing that there, that it's not just in me,
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John 15, 13. It's what is versed in all of the military. And that's what we do. That's what
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guys still going downrange and protecting our freedoms for us to talk here. And for me to drink
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this cup of coffee in this car is because they're willing, men and women willing to go downrange and
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protect our freedoms. So we don't have to worry about car bombs at the local target, which is,
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I'm telling you people, it's a beautiful thing not having to go out and worry about getting blown up
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on the side of the road in the morning. And I think we take that for granted quite a bit,
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but that's the John 15, 13 is sacrifice, selfless service. I'm going to say that pretty much through
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this whole interview. You talk about running towards the gunfire, which is something that
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you did in your life, literally ran towards the gunfire. Was that instinct? I mean, what went
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through your mind as you were in Benghazi and you felt like you had a mission to do and live what
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you're talking about right now? People are going to think I'm weird saying this. I'm lucky. I was very
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lucky to be able to do that at that point in my career. I think that if it may have happened earlier
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before I had, you know, any maturity in me before I had been through things similar to that, not saying
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that very rarely are you going to go through anything similar to 13 hours. You're not, I don't
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care how many combat missions you're on. It's just not going to happen because normally the military
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has support and you have backup, which we didn't. But that point in time in my life, and it was,
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it was a blessing that God put it through me, through us at that point, because we were all
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older. We were all mature. We were all guys that could rely not only on our skill sets, but we had
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the faith to rely on the other skill sets of the other man with us, with Tyrone and Jack Silva and
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Mark Osgeist and John T. Tygen and Boone. That at that point, it wasn't fear or anything else. It was
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just complete instinct. And literally me walking out that front door when we first saw the attack and I
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could see the firefight, I said in my head, God, thank you for letting me be here. Thank you for
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blessing me and putting me in this situation because firefights, when you're able to be able
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to accept the fact that you're in them or accept the fact you're in those situations, they're
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beautiful, brother. They are so beautiful. And when we were with a team that you trust and Boone and I
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were best friends, I'd been deploying with them for 10 years at that point. How lucky was it to be
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with that guy, with my best friend in that situation that I could trust wholeheartedly with my life?
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That doesn't happen. That's like a lottery thing. And so I didn't feel anything, but it was just
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literally, thank you for being here. Thank you for putting me here. Now let the training take over
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because whenever the crap hits the fan, and I tell leaders this, especially when I speak at corporate
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events, you will always fall back on your highest level of training, always. And that's what happened
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when we fell back to our highest level of trainings. Luckily for us at that point, we'd been all older,
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been deploying for quite a while. We'd been in our units before contracting for
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many, many years. So we had a lot of training under our belts. And then we just relied on each other
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and just went for it. You know, you just go, you don't think about it. You just, it's time to move,
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move forward, take care of business and let the chips fall where they may. And accept the fact
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that you're in that situation and thank God that you're there. That's how I felt. And I think I can
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speak for a lot of the guys. I'm sure they felt the same way because there weren't any hiccups that
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night on our part. And it was awesome. It was like a symphony. One of the most beautiful things
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I'd ever seen, ever got experience. When does the reality of the situation
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actually hit you? I mean, I imagine you're on adrenaline and you're talking about relying
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back on that training. Are you in the moment or is it like you're in the zone and then afterwards
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you realize what the hell just happened? You're in what we call it. And again,
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it just depends on the person. I do think it has a lot to do with how you hold yourself with how your
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military bearings and maintaining your composure. With me, it was just, yeah, it's just instinct.
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And that was it. It was just, hey, we need to go. Let's go. Once you start to move,
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now it just becomes you're reacting. Because we didn't have a plan. There wasn't an official plan
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because it was a reactive environment. We weren't proactive. The bad guys, Ansel Sharia,
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they got the initiative. They took the initiative. They were being proactive. And then we, as we
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continually waited, it became more and more of a reactive environment where we just had to move and
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then rely on the training that we've done in the past. And then it does. It just becomes just a job.
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What's the next? You're wargaming. Okay. This minute's gone by. What do I need to do next?
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Okay. I just jumped over this wall. What happens in this normal situation? And you're like a
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microprocessor. In your head, you're going through all different scenarios that you've been through
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before or that you've trained through before, both going through in real life and training.
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And you're thinking as you jump in, okay, what's the best thing? If I get in contact here,
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what do I do? That is based off the outstanding training that you get within the special operations
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community, me being a Ranger, Ty and Jack being SEALs, you know, Boone being Force Recon,
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being MARSOC. You get put in all those scenarios, whether you're downrange in real life or training,
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that you can have a plethora of information in your head that you can just pull from.
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And it becomes instinctive because you're able to remain calm, but you do have that adrenaline,
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but then you go into what's called the flow. So you go on the flow, your world just opens up
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and it's outstanding. It's just, it's so outstanding. You just can't get that back here
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in the States. But then the reality, honestly, for me sits in after the fact and it sits in
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at night or during the day, once you come back home and then be honest with you, when you start
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seeing the news and I don't watch the news anymore because they just spin it. And then you get angry,
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especially in our case, because it was being so misconstrued and lied about and agendized and
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coming back from that. And basically having to sign multiple nondisclosures by the agency and then
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being called liars by people in your own office. That's when the reality set in.
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How do you deal with something like that? I mean, obviously this is a while ago,
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not significantly long ago, but how do you then go on about your everyday ordinary life? I mean,
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is this something that you just try to live and let live, try to forget as best you can,
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You know, I, that's not even, I wish that was even, well, I don't even wish that was possible,
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but it's not possible to ever forget any catastrophic or emotionally traumatic event
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that you go through. Honestly, brother, what I did when I came back and I saw it being
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misconstrued and lied about, I left, I went back to Yemen. I redeployed. I was out. I was like,
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screw this. And I did. I was like, screw this country. I'm gone. I kind of felt what I believed
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that some of the Vietnam guys felt when they came back. Yeah. Cause it was just, yeah, it is.
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You come back and you don't expect medals or honors or anything, but you don't expect to be treated
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like trash and then be told that you aren't telling the truth by some guy that was watching
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it on a computer or read about it on, on social media. And I left, I went to Yemen. I hated this
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country. I did. And then over time, as the, you know, I kept redeploying. And then over time,
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as finally the team, again, the team came together and said, you know what, we're going to have to
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sacrifice our careers, maybe even our lifestyles, our family's lifestyles, but we need to tell the
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truth. And we came together as a team again and voted to tell the truth. And we did, we all lost
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our jobs. We all lost our security clearances, but we told the truth. And that's the right thing
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because you got to be able to live with yourself down the line. And if you're doing it because
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you're not doing the right thing because of money or because of superficial things, and then you're
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not doing the right thing and you have no integrity. So integrity is important. And, and, but I'll be
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honest, brother, over the last three years, I've seen how much support we actually have had
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and people are finally starting to come out of the woodwork and, and it keeps me going.
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I'm a bigger Patriot now than when I first joined the military, because I've seen people rally behind
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us, but I didn't see that the first eight months and it hurt. So I left, I went back and redeployed.
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Yeah. So doing the right thing, you talk about being an integrity and doing the right thing,
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regardless of the outcome of that. Is that this code that you're talking about in the book,
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the Ranger way, or is that something separate than living? Yeah. No, no, that that's in there. And
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you'll, you'll hear it. You'll hear it. And, and I apologize. I couldn't get you the book. Actually,
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I couldn't get anybody to book anyway, because Hachette was not letting it go.
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That's right. Our audience will read it the same time I do. So it'll be good.
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I say it multiple times in the book, taking the hard right over the easy wrong. It's always easy.
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You know, the devil is always giving you that easy path, man. That's easy. You can go that way.
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There's no obstacles, straight line distance. Look at that treasure at the end. And, but then you do it
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at the end, you're unfulfilled and you're not, you're unfulfilled. You may hurt people along the way,
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whether it's emotionally or physically that don't need to be hurt. And when I say,
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and the reason I say it that way is because when the terrorists were trying to kill us,
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we were hurting them. And I don't have any remorse for that. They were coming after us.
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If they would have left us alone, we would have left them alone. But at that particular night in
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Benghazi, Libya, but you know, hard, right? Sometimes you have to make those tough decisions.
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And again, I give an example, multiple examples, but one is, is just telling the story,
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coming out and saying, Hey, this is actually what took place in Benghazi, Libya, knowing that that
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was a hard, right? Because we lost our jobs. We lost our livelihood, stuff that we've been doing
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for years that we even depended on, you know, for food, put food on the table, but it was the right
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thing to do. That was the hard, right? And as history has shown us, and I think history will
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continue even to validate that, that that was the correct decision to make. And that is having
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integrity, doing the right thing when no one else is looking. And that is part of the Ranger way.
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That is hit on the book over and over again, that you are going to have to sometimes suffer a bit
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to do the right thing. But in the end, it's going to come back for you, whether it's just an emotional
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feeling, or even just a spiritual feeling of, you know, I did the right thing, I can live with
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myself. And that's huge in the Ranger way. That's how most Rangers live their lives. They do. That's
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why they do it. That's how most guys in special ops do what they do, because they do feel like
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there's something bigger than them out there. And then they get involved in the situations like we did,
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or other situations that I was involved in Iraq or Afghanistan. And you realize, yep, you know what,
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there is something bigger in us. And I'm glad to be part of that bigger picture. And it's not about
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me. And that's part of the Ranger way to integrity is huge on that brother integrity is huge in being
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a good person and being a God fearing man and realizing that you are fallible. How much does a
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battle plan play into this? Because obviously, you fell back on your training in Benghazi, Libya,
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but you didn't have a battle plan. But then you're talking about building and developing a battle plan,
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not only in the battle, but also in civilian life as well.
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You know, really what that is, and battle plans can be made. And this is where the Ranger way comes
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in quite a bit too, is that in the Ranger way, a battle plan doesn't always mean that you have a
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well-made plan that you put in that you've made, you know, months prior, years prior. It's a plan that
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you have developed over your training and over just little things. I call it putting in your kit bag,
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you find something you like, you find something that works for you, put in your kit bag,
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because you might be able to pull that thing out later and use it. So that's really what the
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battle plan is, is having multiple experiences, going through things that you might fail at and
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learning at from those failures to do the right thing next time, to succeed next time. That's your
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battle plan. So you may have a plan in effect, like, hey, how am I going to pay off my house in 10
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years? Well, chances are, it will not work out the way you planned it. But you've gone through
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experiences that you have before that you can pull from. So once that plan is kind of deviates a
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little bit, you know how to adjust to it. You got that frago, you got that fragmentary order,
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that frago order that, uh-oh, this 10-year plan for pay off my house, I just lost my job. What do I
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do now? Well, you know what? Think about what happens. What's the contingency plan? That's your
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next step in your battle plan. So it's ever-changing, it's ever-flowing. It's like clearing a room. It's like
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clearing a building, fill and flow. You're going into the building, you're clearing a room. Uh-oh,
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there's a door there that I didn't expect. We got to adjust fire and start to clear that.
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Where's our security at? What's our next step? Where are my other buddies going at? What's
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changing? How is this going to change? How do I realize this is changing? What do I do next?
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Well, from training, from putting yourself through training and going through that experience again
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and remembering it. And that's the battle plan. Battle plans never, never, ever work 100%. And
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that's the Ranger way is about that because that's where I learned. We never did a battle. We never did a
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battle plan. We never did a mission that worked as we designed it in our op order. Put that op order
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out. It never worked that way. But we were always able to adjust off it because we had other experiences
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that we could pull off of. And maybe we trained for those contingency plans. So when it messed up,
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we're like, oh crap, well, plan A messed up. I got plan B here. We all know it. Let's deviate and go
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to plan B and still continue on with the mission. The bottom line is you always move forward. You never
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just stop and say, oh crap, we screwed up. What do we do? And then you're stagnant because then you
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will fail. Ranger way is just that battle plan is always, always moving forward and pulling off your
00:19:01.220
experiences. And maybe that one time out of a million, it works how you plan it out. But chances
00:19:06.600
are, it's not going to, but you just don't stop. You still keep moving and you use other experiences
00:19:10.880
in your life to continue to manipulate and go forward towards that goal. Yeah. I mean, I've seen guys be so
00:19:16.840
rigid in their planning and their structures that if one little thing happens to come up,
00:19:21.100
it completely derails them. And like you said, they just, they stagnant, right? They stop and
00:19:25.560
then they get crushed. You talk to Yost. Yost knows the same thing. We call it going in the black
00:19:29.880
guys. Finally, they lose their minds and it's like the power button just shuts off and they stop.
00:19:35.980
And I think that that happened that first 30 minutes in Benghazi to our leadership, to our chief of base
00:19:40.920
and our, our staff team leader is they really didn't have a battle plan for what to do that night
00:19:46.320
because they'd never been through anything like that before. And they'd never been experienced as
00:19:49.940
something. So when it was time for them to actually make a call, they balked, they didn't
00:19:55.080
know what to do. So instead of doing something and they were so afraid of making the wrong decision
00:19:59.580
that they didn't make any decision. And that's when the guys, that's when myself and Tyrone and
00:20:05.240
Boone and Oz and Kig and Jack, that's when we said, you know what, we need to take over now. It's our time
00:20:10.220
to take over. And the reason we were able to do that is because of course, who were we with
00:20:14.580
before? The SOCOM environment, SEALs, Rangers, we've been put through those things before. We
00:20:19.340
had the experience and we had the confidence to say, you know what, we've made decisions before.
00:20:24.600
It may not have been right, but we continued on and we're successful. We're going to do the same
00:20:28.380
thing here, move forward. Every minute that goes by, we're going to reevaluate, but we're going to
00:20:32.980
keep moving forward and then we'll adjust far as we go and we will be successful. But we may not go
00:20:38.400
according to this plan coming out of the gate right now, which it didn't. It didn't work out that way
00:20:42.640
because we ended up fighting our way the last 400 meters on foot. And then of course,
00:20:47.340
little did we know we're going to be there all the way to the next morning, trying to figure out
00:20:50.500
how to get the heck out of there. But we never stopped. And because of that, over 30 people's
00:20:55.040
lives were saved that night. And granted, we only lost four, and I hate to say only, but it's war.
00:21:00.600
You're going to lose people in war, but four people died where it could have been 36 people.
00:21:04.560
And if I remember correctly, one of that top line leadership was awarded the medal of honor. If I
00:21:09.040
remember correctly, which doesn't, based on my limited knowledge, doesn't seem like that was
00:21:13.400
the right move. It's terrible. Politics takes precedence over patriotism now in DC, brother. And
00:21:19.660
yeah, our chief of base, Bob, and our staff team leader wasn't portrayed in the movie. We didn't
00:21:24.540
have time to build his character. So basically him and Bob are the same guy, our chief. In the book,
00:21:29.000
he's in there, he's in the book because the book is, yeah, we wrote it. You can be 100% accurate in
00:21:33.020
the book. Yeah. And that's for people out there, movies are generally like that. You just can't
00:21:36.860
build every character in war movies, even Black Hawk Down morph characters together because
00:21:41.700
you just, you don't have time. But bottom line is, is they won what was called the star for
00:21:45.700
bravery, which is the CIA's medal of honor. And did they deserve it? No, they didn't. They,
00:21:50.860
they didn't do anything. Our team leader didn't fire a shot. They balked. They, they lost us
00:21:55.160
precious time. They, they didn't make decisions and even their mannerisms and their body language
00:22:00.340
when we were fighting that night in particular, and this is in the Ranger. I put this in the
00:22:05.200
Ranger way as well. A section about leadership, your body language. I remember walking into our
00:22:10.180
skiff or talk or building C when we got back to our annex and I'd found a blackberry in the ash
00:22:16.000
in the consulate at the ambassador's villa. So I figured, well, maybe we could see who the text was.
00:22:20.900
He could unlock it. Cause you know, we can do that. And yeah, I'm going to find the chief
00:22:25.820
because of my night vision had broken too. So I'd go get a new set of night nods, new set of my
00:22:30.280
night optical devices. And it was around midnight and I walk in there and he's sitting on his butt
00:22:35.280
with head in his hands, his elbows on his knees. And whether he was thinking defeated or not,
00:22:41.180
I don't know, but the body language showed defeat and he's in the middle of the room showing this to
00:22:45.720
everybody. That was leadership right there. That was a poor leadership decision on his part,
00:22:50.800
whether he was defeated or not, you're giving off that persona of we have failed and people,
00:22:56.440
your subordinates feed off that. And that was part of the book of just leadership. You've got
00:23:01.180
to still stay strong, even if there may be no chance. And there's always going to be a little
00:23:05.160
bit of chance, but even if you're like, gosh, I don't know how we're going to do this. You got
00:23:08.440
to stay positive because it's like a wildfire. You start being negative, your subordinates feed off
00:23:12.960
that. And then they all go negative too. And I learned that from my first battalion commander,
00:23:17.440
Stanley McChrystal, Lieutenant Colonel McChrystal, General McChrystal now of the right,
00:23:21.700
right body language, right persona to portray success. You can't look like you're going to feed it.
00:23:26.420
If you're going to try to portray success to your subordinates and he did. And in that case,
00:23:29.900
that was awful because now everybody's going to give up and we're only at midnight and we had
00:23:34.420
to fight our way through that. And that was again, the blessing of having the guys with me that were
00:23:38.540
true leaders, whether they were leaders on paper or not, they were true leaders in life with Tyrone
00:23:43.160
and Jack and Oz and Tig and Boone that we didn't let it affect us. So we just continued to fight on.
00:23:49.080
And that was the right thing to do. What he did was completely wrong. And you should never do that as a
00:23:52.600
leader, never give your body language, the defeatist look in front of your subordinates ever.
00:23:56.420
I'm going to assume that he didn't know what to do and how to react to that situation,
00:24:00.620
which is what you've alluded to. What in that situation, because I've been in a situation where
00:24:04.620
I'm like, I have no idea what to do next. What is the correct move in that type of situation?
00:24:08.980
Put pride aside. And the Ranger way talks about this too. I had some great leaders,
00:24:13.900
even tab spec fours and, and team leaders, E fives that normally they knew they were experts in
00:24:19.540
everything that we had to do there. But what you would do is they put away their pride. Sometimes
00:24:23.180
they didn't know. And if a private knew more, they would rely on them. They say, Hey, what do I do
00:24:27.280
here? I'm not for sure. Maybe it wasn't. And it could have even been in private. It didn't have
00:24:30.540
to be in front of people. Right. But what I'm saying is you put away your pride and you say, Hey,
00:24:35.560
I don't know what to do here. You guys have more experience take over, which in our case,
00:24:39.380
it's such a perfect black and white example where the first 30 minutes where we were held back after
00:24:45.060
that first five, he didn't know what to do. He was holding us back. Same with our team leader,
00:24:49.400
because I won't allude to it. They didn't know what the heck they were going to do. They'd never
00:24:53.280
been in that situation before where they had to make a call as far as military wise. Our team leader
00:24:57.320
was a former secret service guy. He had no military experience either. And, um, they should have
00:25:02.440
turned it over. You turn it over to your guys, your subordinates that have the experience. I learned
00:25:08.460
that. And I put it in the book too. I learned that from being on an A team and a special forces, 18,
00:25:12.820
the alpha, the 18 alpha, the captain, he's well-versed in a little parts of everything that one of the,
00:25:19.220
that a sergeant has to do on his team, whether it's a weapon sergeant, the comm sergeant, you know,
00:25:23.380
the, the engineer, but when it comes to a specific duty that needs to be done, let's say there has
00:25:28.740
to be BOD stuff done. There has to be explosive ordinance done. The team leader doesn't take charge
00:25:33.940
of that. He may delegate. This is what needs to be done, but then he turns it over to his subject
00:25:38.060
matter expert, which is his EOD, which is his explosive sergeant. Or if it's a weapons thing,
00:25:42.580
he turns it over to his Bravo. That's what you do. You put your pride aside and say, you know,
00:25:46.860
I don't know what to do here, buddy. I know you work for me, but you are the expert in this field.
00:25:52.320
Guide me. What do we need to do? And that's when they should have just said, Hey, you guys know
00:25:55.820
what's going on. You Seals, Rangers, and Marines have been doing this for 18 years. You guys know
00:26:00.120
what to do. Take over. This is just what we expect happened, which is really should have been just,
00:26:04.720
Hey, go find the ambassador, save him, get him back here. Roger that, sir. And then we just
00:26:09.200
hustled and did him out. But because of his delay and because of the death of the ambassador,
00:26:14.420
Sean Smith, of smoke inhalation, I do believe that delay caused their deaths because they
00:26:18.460
weren't shot. They were dead because of the fire and they died of smoke inhalation, which takes,
00:26:22.620
which takes a little bit of time. You just, as a leader, you got to put your pride aside. You
00:26:26.900
don't know everything. You don't. And sometimes you got to say, Hey, buddy, I know you work for me,
00:26:31.700
but I don't know what to do here. Can you help me out? And I do that a lot. I'm not an expert. I don't
00:26:36.920
know everything. And that makes a good leader because you surround yourself with good people that
00:26:40.760
do know what they're doing. If Trump says, Hey, we need to know what to do here. We're going to go
00:26:44.700
in and we're going to battle here in Afghanistan. This is what my, what my troops doing. And he's
00:26:49.560
got general Mattis, not doing anything. Trump's a piss poor leader because she's got an expert right
00:26:53.940
there. Hey, general Mattis, this is what the in-state is. We need to make sure Taliban's gone.
00:26:58.040
What do we do? Take it over. And general Mattis does the plan. That's being a good leader right
00:27:04.220
Med exciting times within the iron council. If you don't already know the iron council is our exclusive
00:27:09.200
brotherhood where men are working to become the men they are meant to be. Uh, it's easy to talk
00:27:14.700
about being a better man, but it's another thing entirely to do the work required. We're talking
00:27:19.420
about that all the time to be that man. But when you band with us, you're going to have access to
00:27:24.560
the tools, the resources, the structure, the accountability, everything you need to take your
00:27:28.460
life and the lives of those you have a responsibility for to that next level. Each month we focus on a
00:27:34.540
particular topic. This month is all about building more wealth in our lives. And we dive deep into what
00:27:40.120
it takes to improve in that specific area. So if you are ready to step up in your life, if you're
00:27:46.160
ready to surround yourself with other men who want to succeed and they want to see you succeed, then the
00:27:52.460
iron council is where you need to be. So if you want to learn more about what we're up to, get all the
00:27:57.480
details, the good, the bad, the ugly, uh, you can reserve your spot and learn what we're all about at
00:28:02.580
order of man.com slash iron council. Again, that's order of man.com slash iron council. Now, let me get
00:28:09.040
back to our conversation with Chris short of placing yourself in a dangerous situation or finding yourself
00:28:16.440
in a firefight for your life and death. Literally, what can a civilian man do to create some of these
00:28:22.780
experiences that will allow him to build up some of this resiliency and mental toughness and fortitude that
00:28:29.060
you all exhibit? Yeah, that's where I like doing the Ranger way because it's very simple. It's not a war book.
00:28:35.520
It's not a, Hey, you have to be in so calm training to become successful as a leader. You just have to be
00:28:41.560
willing to get out of your comfort zone every once in a while. And there are specific examples throughout the
00:28:45.700
book where, you know, I was an independent insurance adjuster when I had a break in
00:28:49.560
service from the military. People don't realize that I actually went through basic training twice. And I went to
00:28:54.140
Ranger Indoc twice and airborne school because I had a break in service. I didn't know that. And that's in the book.
00:28:59.120
Yeah. Yeah. I, I went and got my master degree and I got bored. I'm like, ah, crap. I'm going back in the service.
00:29:03.140
It sucks. But when I was an insurance adjuster, same thing. I gave that example. I didn't know what an insurance
00:29:09.880
adjuster was. And I got hired on as one at Mutual of Omaha. What I did is to learn is I take a step back.
00:29:16.700
I put my pride aside. I'm a civilian now. Teach me, what do I need to do here? And then I would
00:29:22.340
learn. I would learn from my bosses that knew more than me. And then I would always take chances to
00:29:27.580
get out there. If there was something that needed to be done, whether it was to get up on a roof to
00:29:31.340
measure it or go to special classes to learn how to build houses, even though it took extra time of
00:29:36.300
mine, I'd go do it. Get out of your comfort zone. Do I want to go home now? Yes, I want to go home.
00:29:40.740
But wait a second. I need to learn more about my job to be a subject matter expert in it
00:29:45.360
so I can move up and become a leader and become more confident and comfortable. And that's the
00:29:49.060
biggest thing. You become confident. So the book, what do you go into is just push yourself to do
00:29:54.260
other things, even if it takes a little time away from you being at home, or it takes a little way
00:29:58.140
of time from you going out to happy hour. It will benefit you in the future because you are bettering
00:30:03.280
yourself and you're sacrificing yourself again. Sacrifice doesn't mean you have to sacrifice your life.
00:30:09.100
Sometimes it means just sacrifice a little bit of your time to go that little extra mile. And it's okay.
00:30:14.160
And if you fail, don't worry about it. If you don't pass that class, you don't get that promotion.
00:30:18.940
Come back, do what we do, do an AR. Okay, what could I have done better? Is there anything else
00:30:23.140
I could have done to train to get myself up to that next tier? And then take a step back and go
00:30:28.320
up another two steps forward and make that happen so the next time you don't fail. And then, you know,
00:30:32.760
if you do again and accept that failure as a chance to better yourself, whatever it is, there's so many
00:30:38.140
military how to do books, how to become a SEAL, how to this, and they're great. But I wanted this to apply
00:30:43.380
to the civilian world as well because you're right. Not everybody's going to want to be or even have
00:30:48.140
the chance to be in a firefight or go to ranger school or go to buds. That's not what it is. You
00:30:53.140
don't have to be that type of person to do that to become successful in what you do. You just have
00:30:57.480
to be willing to be able to accept failure, learn from it, and then go ahead and better yourself next
00:31:03.040
time and get out of your comfort zone. And integrity is throughout. Again, integrity, just doing the
00:31:08.260
right thing. All right, push yourself, push yourself, push yourself, and don't cheat. Don't
00:31:13.620
try to take the easy route because it will come back and bite you. And again, the book is full of
00:31:17.920
examples of that where I pulled it back and said, hey, you don't have to be a ranger to be able to
00:31:22.460
do this. You just have to be willing to go out there and be a little bit uncomfortable every once
00:31:26.180
in a while. You don't have to go to ranger school to be uncomfortable, but you can be uncomfortable
00:31:29.480
every once in a while because it's going to help you learn and it's going to help you be able to
00:31:33.740
accept when there is uncomfortabilities in your job that you can't control. And I love how we were
00:31:39.440
able to put that in there like that. And I guess I was smarter than what I thought I was. I don't
00:31:44.580
know how it happened. Well, you're pretty modest with that stuff because obviously you've got some
00:31:49.260
great stuff in here for sure. Thanks, sir. I appreciate it. Thanks, Ryan. I do appreciate that,
00:31:53.440
brother. One of the things you talk a lot about is developing a mission. And I know as I spent a
00:31:58.100
little time in the military, one of the things that's very difficult to see is when we get into
00:32:01.600
engagements where we don't really have a clear and articulate mission or a definition of what
00:32:05.900
success would even look like, how does a man who might feel maybe even a little bit lost or just
00:32:11.000
maintaining the status quo develop a mission in his own life? Well, and that goes into the battle
00:32:16.220
plan too as well. You're having that least little, that battle plan you have. Again, granted, it's going
00:32:20.780
to deviate from it a bit as you move forks. It always does. But yeah, you do need to set that end goal.
00:32:25.800
But what people have a problem with is when they got that end goal, it seems so far away that
00:32:31.520
they don't think they can grab it. They don't think they can ever make it to it. So then you
00:32:34.520
set in and people have heard this before too. So I'm not reinventing the wheel here. You set those
00:32:38.620
little goals. Okay. What do I need to do next? My goal when I got, and people don't notice it's in
00:32:43.760
the book. I got booted out of the military. The first time I was in, I got in trouble and I got out.
00:32:47.640
Luckily I got an honorable discharge, but I had to fight my way to get back in. My final goal to get
00:32:52.500
back when I got out was I got to get back in. My dad said, always finish what you started.
00:32:57.040
Roger that. I'm got to fit. And so what I would do, that goal seems so far away.
00:33:02.140
So I set the little goals. All right. Well, what can I do next is to continue to stay positive
00:33:07.000
and continue to keep bettering myself. I'll go take the GRE, the graduate records examination.
00:33:11.580
So I did. All right. I did that. What do I do next? You know what? Let's get my master's degree.
00:33:16.020
It's something, it may not be military, but I'm bettering myself. I'm gaining confidence.
00:33:19.540
So I went and got my master's degree. And during that timeframe, every day I was like, okay,
00:33:23.520
I know I need to, I'm going to be able to get back in. I'm not going to let this stop
00:33:26.680
me. I'm going to be physically ready this time. Cause I know what's coming at me, which
00:33:30.700
I'm very lucky. Cause I going in the second time, I knew what kind of physical standards
00:33:34.100
that they held. Sure. So every day I would, I would train, I went and bought a old rucksack
00:33:39.260
from an army surplus store and filled it up with 50 pounds. And every Friday I do my ruck
00:33:43.180
marches on my own, you know, as a civilian, I work out all the time and you'd be surprised
00:33:48.080
people out there, how much just being physically fit just improves your confidence and your
00:33:52.720
mental state. And it did. I started to get extremely strong and physically fit, but it
00:33:58.040
also was sacrifice. I'd have to sacrifice time out with the, I know I was back in college,
00:34:03.800
sacrificing time back out and doing what college kids do. I was still college age. I was only
00:34:07.840
27 and I wasn't really that old for being a graduate student, but I would sacrifice and
00:34:13.180
I'd go to the gym or I'd read, I'd study more about weapons systems. I'd study a little
00:34:17.420
bit more about what my job was and it's those little goals. So as time grew on and I got
00:34:23.040
closer to actually getting back into the military, which I had to wait two years when I got there,
00:34:27.940
I was ready. I was physically and mentally ready. And it also, all those little things
00:34:32.160
I did to accomplish that, to get up when the Sergeant major that I went to apply, when
00:34:35.960
I went back in, I said, I want to go back into the military. What do I need to do? The first
00:34:39.600
question the Sergeant major asked me that, cause I had to do this huge, huge board.
00:34:44.420
It was kind of intimidating. He said, what have you been doing the last two years?
00:34:48.680
I could tell him and he saw that I had been improving myself. So it was like, well, this
00:34:53.540
guy has been sitting just dilly dally and he's actually really motivated. He's been improving
00:34:58.140
himself. He really wants this. I really think that's what got me back because I had to get
00:35:01.680
a waiver to get back in. That's what got me to waiver is because this Sergeant major and
00:35:06.240
the first sergeant said, Hey, Holy crap, look what this kid's been doing. And he got his graduate
00:35:10.180
degree. Well, this is a no brainer. I think if I would have sat on my ass and felt sorry
00:35:14.400
for myself and did it, I don't think it would have. I don't think it would have. I, I, and
00:35:18.180
again, I, you, you never know, but the chances of me getting back in probably would have lessened.
00:35:23.080
And that's why I tell guys, just, you see that long goal over there. See so far hard.
00:35:27.440
It's looks so hard to reach. So set those little goals and just keep working at them every day,
00:35:32.320
working at them. And then that becomes your battle rhythm too. It just becomes natural.
00:35:36.360
It came to where Fridays, if I didn't do a rope march on Fridays as a civilian, I felt like
00:35:40.720
I was missing something in my life because it just became so accustomed to it. If I didn't do
00:35:44.880
my studies at a certain time, then it just felt that I needed to get it done. Now you're not always
00:35:49.560
going to be able to do that, you know, but at least that gets into your battle rhythm where you now
00:35:53.360
know, here's my responsibilities. This is what I need to do. All right, let's go get it done.
00:35:57.760
Don't overwhelm yourself with it. You don't need to go out and work out for four hours, maybe do an hour
00:36:02.160
every other day or something like that. Just do it. So you're comfortable, but you're continually doing it.
00:36:06.740
And every day you'll improve a little bit more. And every day you maybe even do a little bit more.
00:36:11.100
That's all it is. It's so simple. And everybody knows this. It's just sometimes you'd rather just
00:36:16.240
sit there and watch TV. And even though you have responsibilities and sometimes you have to force
00:36:21.000
yourself out, do the hard, right, be uncomfortable, force yourself to get that thing done. And every
00:36:26.320
once in a while, Ryan, I do want to tell people too, though, sometimes there is a day you got to take
00:36:29.780
it off. Take that day. God day of rest too. Some days you do have to feel your body and your mind.
00:36:34.880
You're like, you know what? I really need to relax today. And it's okay to do that too. You just
00:36:39.420
don't want to make that a habit. But it's so easy. And I hope people can use my experiences of failing
00:36:46.000
to learn that you can still succeed as long as you continue to drive and you continue the bottom line
00:36:52.320
and the bases. Always move forward. Never stop. Don't let those obstacles stop you. You go through it,
00:36:57.360
you go around it, you go over it like a ranger, but you just always go forward. And you will succeed.
00:37:01.780
You just don't expect it to know the exact time. Just keep moving forward.
00:37:07.240
Yeah. And I think people will learn from it because if I can compliment you, you've had the courage
00:37:11.600
and you've sacrificed a lot on your end to share a story that needed to be shared. So I certainly
00:37:16.380
appreciate it. I know the guys listening do as well. Thanks, brother. And I didn't say at the
00:37:20.540
beginning of the show, and I'm sorry, I forgot, but I always say it to a veteran I'm talking to. Thanks.
00:37:24.260
Thanks for your service too, man. I mean, we're brothers. It doesn't matter who we serve if we're
00:37:28.400
always brothers because we broke the same bread and we both have sacrificed.
00:37:31.980
Man, I'm honored. I'm honored. Well, Chris, we're winding down on time. You're a busy man. You're
00:37:35.860
traveling. You're doing so much. I want to be conscious of your time. As we wind down, I want to
00:37:41.560
ask you a couple of questions. And the first one I did give you a heads up a little bit on,
00:37:45.200
and that question is, what does it mean to be a man?
00:37:48.240
To me, when I think of man, and you said, even when you said it that first time, I think of my father
00:37:53.000
right there. He epitomized a man to me. He was respectful. He taught me manners. He taught me
00:37:59.280
how to be chivalrous. He always opened the doors for your lady, for your girlfriend, for your wife.
00:38:04.860
He taught me how to love. He taught me, again, once you start something, you never quit. He showed me
00:38:09.020
integrity. He showed me honor. He showed me courage. Even though he never was in the military,
00:38:13.340
he showed me all those things growing up and that you never quit. You never give up. One of the things I
00:38:18.400
got from, it was so huge growing up, is that you'd be a good father. He was an outstanding. He still is
00:38:23.700
an outstanding father. And I think all those things right there, I just give you one word answer for
00:38:28.560
being a man. Father, honor, integrity, strength, chivalry. You also manners. Yes, sir. No, sirs.
00:38:37.400
Yes, ma'ams. No, ma'ams. And always, always as a man or a woman, if you don't put it that way,
00:38:42.800
always as a man, you always finish what you start. Always. You never give up.
00:38:48.440
And even if the worst case scenario, if you're moving towards something, whether it's to take
00:38:52.060
care of your family, whether it's to get a new job, whether it's to raise your children right,
00:38:57.420
even if you have setbacks, I have. And I don't condone it, but I've had a divorce. But me and
00:39:02.180
my ex-wife still, because I want to be a good father, because that's what a man does. We still
00:39:07.300
are on good terms, and I still get as much time with my kids when I'm on the road as possible.
00:39:11.840
And I even take them with me sometimes, because that is what means to be a man, is being a good
00:39:15.800
father as well. That's what I got from him the utmost, is how great of a father he was.
00:39:20.120
But all those other things I've said, too, which is, honestly, everybody should live. But in today's
00:39:24.620
society, a lot of that is gone, and it needs to come back. And that starts with teaching your
00:39:30.720
children from the beginning. Like my father taught me, like I teach my children, always,
00:39:35.560
always be respectful. Don't forget your sirs and ma'ams. When sirs and ma'ams go, it seems like,
00:39:40.260
dang, everything in society, the rest is to follow. And we've got to bring that back.
00:39:44.780
And not having so much pride that you can't admit to being wrong. My dad taught me that, too. He says,
00:39:49.840
son, I'm not always right. I'm not always right. I try to be. But be man enough to admit when you're
00:39:55.020
wrong. I remember him saying that so much when I was growing up, because I was wrong a lot.
00:39:58.640
And I wouldn't be wrong, especially in high school. Be man enough to admit that you're wrong, son.
00:40:03.080
And all those things, I wish there was a one-word answer. There's not. But it's honestly,
00:40:07.500
it's what everybody already knows what a man should be. And that is someone with integrity
00:40:12.280
and someone that has immense faith. I'm a Christian. I believe in God. I'm not going to
00:40:18.480
get on here until you all have to believe in God. That's not for me to say. That's for the higher
00:40:23.220
power to say eventually when you meet him. But what I'm going to tell you right now is that you do need
00:40:29.200
to believe in something. And I learned that from my dad. There is something out there. There's a higher
00:40:33.520
power that is taking care of us. And that's part of being a man as well. It is.
00:40:37.500
I'm not politically correct. I'm not going to try to be. People may hate me for that. I don't care.
00:40:41.520
But there is something out there that's taking care of us. And that's part of being a man is
00:40:44.640
accepting that you aren't the end-all be-all and that you are fallible. So yeah, when you said that,
00:40:51.240
that's the first picture that popped in my head was my father. When you said, what's it like to be
00:40:54.420
a man? What does it take? And every time that I hear something like that, when you said it,
00:41:00.520
I love it, Chris. I love it. Powerful stuff. I'll make sure we link everything up we talked
00:41:05.040
about in the show notes. I appreciate you. I appreciate the way you show up. And certainly
00:41:09.140
your sacrifice, your sacrifice to this country. Sounds like we didn't always treat you the way
00:41:12.880
you needed to be treated, but it sounds like we've maybe reconciled that to some degree. And
00:41:17.160
man, I just appreciate you taking the time to visit with us and impart some of your wisdom.
00:41:22.040
Thanks, Ryan. Thanks for letting me talk too. I know I manipulated the conversation,
00:41:25.540
monopolized it a bit, but I appreciate it, Ryan. And God bless you, brother. Anytime you want me on,
00:41:30.180
any friend of Yost is a friend of mine, man. So you just let me know.
00:41:33.040
Right on. We'll do it again. Enjoy your trip, safe travels, and we'll talk soon, Chris.
00:41:36.860
All right, brother. Have a good day. God bless you.
00:41:39.860
There it is, guys. My conversation with American hero, Chris Tonto Peranto. In having the opportunity to
00:41:45.360
talk with Chris and getting to know him a bit more, I can tell you that he is the real deal and a man
00:41:50.720
that we can all learn a ton about how to operate in our own lives. He did not mention it in the
00:41:55.320
interview, but if you want to pick up a copy of his book, The Ranger Way, I highly, highly suggest
00:42:00.100
that you do. As of the recording of our interview, I didn't have the chance to read the entire book
00:42:05.220
because it hadn't been released yet, but I did read quite a bit of it this morning. And I can tell
00:42:09.760
you that there is a ton of actionable advice in there for any man who is listening to the show right
00:42:15.700
now. And you can get the link to that book at order of man.com slash one one four. And that's
00:42:21.040
called The Ranger Way. Again, in the meantime, make sure you check out our exclusive brotherhood,
00:42:25.280
the iron council. You're going to get the tools, the guidance, the brotherhood, the resources,
00:42:29.060
the accountability, everything to help you set the benchmark and the framework for what you are
00:42:35.340
going to need to do in your life in order to improve in your health and your business and your
00:42:40.800
relationships and just yourself, your overall life. So if you are interested in learning more about
00:42:45.380
what we're up to and joining us inside the iron council, you can do so at order of man.com
00:42:49.880
slash iron council guys. I will look forward to talk with you on Friday for our Friday field notes,
00:42:55.240
but until then take action and become the man you are meant to be. Thank you for listening to the
00:43:01.320
order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant
00:43:06.340
to be. We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.