153： Developing Physical and Emotional Intelligence ｜ Josh Trent
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Summary
Josh Trent is the founder of Wellness Force and is focused on helping people across the planet lead healthy lives. Throughout his 14 years in the health and wellness industry, Josh has helped thousands of men understand and develop physical and emotional intelligence. He s worked with and interviewed hundreds of the best minds in the wellness industry on his own personal journey, which he shares here.
Transcript
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We all know health and wellness are important when it comes to stepping into our full potential,
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but most of us tend to think that it ends with eating right and exercising.
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While those elements are certainly important on our road to a healthy life,
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it goes well beyond lifting weights and eating salads.
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He is the founder of Wellness Force and is focused on helping people across the planet
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Today we talk about connecting the head and heart,
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how to harness both the beast and the spirit inside all men,
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and how to develop physical and emotional intelligence.
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Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.
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When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time, every time.
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You are not easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong.
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At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,
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My name is Ryan Michler, and I am the host and founder of this podcast,
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This is all about becoming a better man, a better husband, father, business owner,
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community leader, and just a better man in general.
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To that end, we are interviewing the world's most successful men.
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We are extracting their hard-fought and hard-earned lessons,
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and then, of course, we're delivering them straight to you each and every week.
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This week is no different, but before we get into the conversation,
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I do want to mention our podcast sponsor, Health IQ.
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They just reached out to me and said that they want to continue working with us and the show,
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and I can only assume that's because a bunch of you have gone to
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healthiq.com slash orderofman to see if you can save money on your life insurance,
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They're using statistics and science to save healthy people like a lot of you are money on
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their life insurance, so if you're healthy, there's no reason that you need to pay more
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than you should for life insurance, just as if you're a good driver, there's no reason to pay
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extra for auto insurance, so since a bunch of you guys have already gone to healthiq.com
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slash orderofman to see if you can save, I'd encourage the rest of you to do it as well.
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You get your free quote to see if you can save money on your life insurance.
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Now, the other thing that I wanted to mention today before we get into the show,
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I'm going to tell you more about it during the break, but really quickly, this is our third
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event of this kind, and I just sat down with my business partner on these experiences,
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Like I said, I'm going to tell you more about it during the break, but if you want to know
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Guys, my guest today is the founder of Wellness Force, Josh Trent.
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Josh and I met at the Spartan World Championship, and since the minute I met this guy, I've been
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blown away with his energy and enthusiasm and the desire to live life well.
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Throughout his 14 years inside the health and wellness industry, Josh has helped thousands
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of men understand and develop physical and emotional intelligence, which is what we're
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going to be talking about in our interview today.
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His knowledge, his experience, it goes well beyond what every other quote unquote fitness
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guru will tell you as he takes a more well-rounded approach to developing the body and the mind
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He's worked with and interviewed hundreds of the sharpest minds in the wellness industry
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and has been on his own personal journey, which he shares here.
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It's always powerful when you can hear somebody else's journey who's overcome their own odds
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He's going to talk more about that in the interview today.
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And you are going to carry this conversation, but I have no doubt you're the man for the
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You know, I do a lot of interviews with a lot of guys and I go on a lot of people's
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shows and I got to tell you our conversation, man, I just really enjoyed in your level of
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energy and excitement and enthusiasm for what you're doing.
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It was one of my favorites and it was this exploration of what does it mean to be a real man right now,
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Let's talk about that for a second, because you said how it's changed.
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Well, back in the day when men literally were judged by what they could hunt, kill and bring
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Now, as Tim Ferriss describes, we understand that our spear has become money.
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So in our current societal paradigm, money has become the new spear.
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And I love that analogy because it's not about how he can hunt and kill and bring things
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Like it's, what do we actually hunt down and bring back to our family in regards to monetary
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So I think that's the biggest piece about how men are, let's be real, judged by the female,
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It's really funny that we, I say we, I don't think you and I, but we as a society seem to
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buck that, that idea, that notion that we are, we are judged for what we do as men.
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Let's talk about your mindset around money, because what you do with regards to wellness
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And I think money and our relationship with it certainly has something to do with it.
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But I think there's a lot of people out there who have this really, really strange relationship
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And I'm curious about your take on that since we're talking about man and money.
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Man, I'm getting lit up by this because my money story is continues to evolve, Ryan.
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And I'm sure people listening can relate, you know, however we're raised, we spend the
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rest of our adult life either using that to our advantage or having it be something deleterious.
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And so when I was a kid, money meant pain, money meant pressure, money meant scarcity,
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money meant people that have a bunch of money, take advantage of other people.
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And I've come to find out, especially in the past five years on my journey around money,
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It's going to do what energy does, and that is multiply when the space is held for it to
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In other words, my view on money now is I use money so that I can live out my dream.
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And I think we get to start shifting our paradigm around money being this evil thing only because
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let's face it, man, the law of duality is present in everything and very much so when
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And I want to talk specifically what you said about money is flowing like water.
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If I understand you correctly, and one of the thoughts I've always had is that you will
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not be able to attract more money into your life or replace money with anything, love,
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I mean, replace that word with anything until you're able to master what you currently have.
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I like to expand because I think mastering is the mastering, the plural.
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It's the continuous mastering because let's face it, we like I described, we have these
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experiences that happen for us when we're kids.
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I believe it's also what kind of drives you and order of man.
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How do I take what happened to me, the stories, the beliefs, the events and use those to my
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advantage, actually sharpening my sword with these events.
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And so money, the mastering of, especially when we look at cryptocurrency and we understand
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what's happening right now with our current system, we're experiencing right now what
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I think is kind of pre-crash, especially here, we're talking February of 2018.
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We get to really understand as men that money is something that we're judged upon and that's
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okay because that's part of our skill set as a man.
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But as you talk about on your podcast, man, as we always explore in this world as a man,
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I don't think we ever get to a finish line when it comes to money or our health or our
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Well, one of the things you just barely talked about is, is that the, the scripts or the things
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that we believe that we were raised believing and money doesn't grow on trees and money's
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And we're talking about money, but again, this could be anything.
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How do you begin to recognize what scripts are serving you and which ones are not serving
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you sometimes it's difficult because this is just the way that we think it is.
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And there's no alternative to our current beliefs.
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What is your current result around health, wealth relationships?
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And if you're not happy, if you check yourself deep in your core, in your deepest, most inner
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part, the part that you talk to, you talk to yourself before you go to bed, that voice,
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that person, are you truly happy with that relationship with your deepest inner self?
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And what I'm talking about is your relationship with your young man inside.
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You know, a lot of things that happened to us when we're young men, these stories you mentioned,
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It was the young man inside of us, that young man inside of us that didn't get what he needed,
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didn't get the psychological or the physiological tools, got taught a bullshit relationship with
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That's the person that we're actually talking to as an adult.
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As adults, Ryan, we are child inside wrapped in a meat suit as an adult going through this
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current society on a rock spinning throughout our space, which we're all trying to make sense
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of here. So long story short, what are your results? Are you happy with those? And then
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let's take the deeper emotional inventory around how to change it.
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You talk about the inventory and one of the words and terms I've heard is the reflection
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process as well. And I certainly have some things that I've implemented in my life.
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And I think there's a lot of people who come on the show and have their own podcast and their
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own messages. And they're saying, you've got to understand yourself and you've got to know who
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you are and you have to be self-aware. But I think we say it so often that it's kind of surface
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level and it loses a lot of its its meaning and and how we actually do this. So what is
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your process for self-assessment, self-evaluation actually look like?
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Yeah, tactically, I start with this is a kind of three step process. So when I feel the need
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and by the way, our body's intelligence will tell us our heart, our chest, our somatic experience
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will tell us when we get to make a change, either relationship, health or wealth. So what I do
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is I get in a workout, I shower, I eat a healthy meal and I take a technology fast. So for three
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hours, I will go to a park here. I'm lucky enough to live in Encinitas. So I'll go to a park. The
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weather's pretty nice. Find a space where you can disconnect from your monkey mind, from your phone,
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from all the stuff that pulls you away from your current experience as a man. Sit there and allow
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yourself to do box breathing. So I learned this from Mark Devine and it's box breathing of a five,
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five, five count, five second inhale, five second exhale, five second pause, and then repeat that
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cycle. So take yourself to that space where you're cleaned out. You've done your workout. You've gotten
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rid of all the crap. Then get a piece of paper, draw a line down the middle on the left side of
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the paper. Take your emotional inventory, literally write down 10 things or people or experiences that
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you know, you know the truth that these things are draining you. They're draining your psychology.
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They're draining your finance. They're draining your time and be honest with yourself. Go there.
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Allow yourself to do it. You're going to have to experience those things first, though. You're
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going to have to feel them. And it's a lot of things, Ryan, that men don't want to do right now
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is men do not want to feel this permission to feel our feelings is a paradigm that gets to change
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immediately. And that really is where we're going now with this left side of the page on the right
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side of the page. List down a possible solution to each one of these things that are bothering
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you. And then after you've done another cycle of box breathing, pick one thing. It's overwhelming
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to do 10 things at once. Sure. But if you pick one, you go on that paper, you take the emotional
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inventory, you feel your damn feelings, feel them. Then what is one thing you're willing to take action
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on in the next seven days? And then that's it, my friends. Take that one action. Then call in the
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support from your men's groups, from your podcast, from your community. We're so blessed right now
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to have a Facebook and Instagram and Twitter where people can connect with us, right? It doesn't
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always have to be in person to call in that support because the very same fear that made you not take
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the inventory or the very same fear that will possibly trip you up in taking that one action
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that you've committed to from your inventory. That's the fear that only gets spent away that
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only gets dissolved by other men helping you by other people in your community or wherever you're
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doing, whatever you're doing, podcasting, things like this. We need that as men. We need each other.
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It's a dying art form that groups of men come together, which is why I think men's work is so
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pivotal, man. So do you do this every, every week, every month, every day, or just, Hey, when I feel
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like it, what does this actually look like for you? For me? Um, I've done some somatic experiencing
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work. I I'm in a men's group right now. We base a lot of our trainings off of David Dita's work,
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the way of the superior man. So I'll go into a somatic experience where am I feeling it in my throat?
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Am I feeling these feelings in my solar plexus or a feeling in my stomach? So I'll go into where I'm
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actually feeling it. And I will literally, it sounds crazy. I will just allow myself to feel
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the negative emotion or to feel the sadness or to feel whatever it is. And if it's strong enough,
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it'll motivate me to go take that inventory in the park. Um, for me, it's been, you know,
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with as much as I'm charging with this business, I'll just be totally brutally real. It's been probably
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a once a month thing, you know, for me to take this deep inventory.
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So let's be honest here. And if I feel like I can share this with anybody, it's you.
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I hear this. And I think just with my personality, and I know there's other guys that are listening
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to this as well, who think, I don't know, man, this is like woo woo, or I don't have time for this.
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And I tend to be a driver. I'm like, no, just, just like, go do the work. Like, just go get it done.
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And so what do you say to me or anybody else who might be feeling or experiencing the same thoughts?
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Don't silence your inner young man. You silence your inner young man. You tell your inner young
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man that it's not okay to feel the feelings you're feeling as a, as a grown man, you will continue
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to experience the crap results that you have because it's not about woo woo. Look, it might
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be painted as woo woo because in our current society, we have a news media. We have a narrative
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in our society that is men are strong. Men are Gary Cooper and men are John Wayne. Well,
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that's complete BS. Those are not real men. Those are men that are, were a fictitious character in
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the movies, but somehow that filtered over to politics. It filtered over to our ways of being
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as men, a real man, a true, real man feels his feelings, takes inspired action and does an inventory
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in the same way for his emotions. Like he does for his business. Let's talk about this, this notion of
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emotional intelligence, because I've, I've heard you use this term before, and I've even heard you say it
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just in this couple of, you know, 10, 15 minutes that we've been talking already, this idea of
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intelligence. What is, what does that mean to you? And then specifically, what is emotional intelligence?
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The emotional intelligence, that's a great question, but nobody's ever asked me that laser
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question. I think that when we look at intelligence, it's the accumulation of knowledge that you've
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achieved on your specific personal journey. Now, for me, my emotional intelligence stemmed from
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a childhood where I was actually raised in a home that was broken. I was raised on welfare. If people
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don't know what that is, it's like government cheese and kick cereal. Okay. So my dad left when
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I was really young, I didn't know what it was like to have a safe haven at home. So I always had a
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nervous system that was constantly under fight and flight. Now my emotional intelligence stemmed from
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that because I was freaking unhappy with my results when I was in my twenties. So I'm 280 pounds. I'm at a
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job that I hate. I'm in a relationship I don't like all roads led to me changing something, but I was
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scared, right? I wasn't allowing that young man inside of me to feel his feelings. And, um, true
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emotional intelligence is this constant gathering, Ryan. It's the constant gathering of evidence so
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that we're reflecting what are the results we currently have? Do we love those results as a
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conscious man in this world? And if we don't love them, like, are we willing to grow our intelligence
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more? And I'll tell you, as we up level in life, we're always getting to grow our emotional
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intelligence because we're never going to be satisfied. I hope we're never satisfied as men.
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We're always going to the next phase, the next chapter, uh, not from a place of tension or fear
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or scarcity, but from a place of like, ah, I've taken an inventory and it's time for me to go a
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different route. Hmm. Yeah. So you, you, you said you weighed 280 pounds. Is that right? You weighed
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280 pounds at one point to 80, man, because I use food as a way to numb, which it's interesting
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timing of this. The CDC last year just released a report in late November, uh, 67%, 67% of people
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in America are overweight or obese. We know that food is the ultimate equalizer when it comes to
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silencing our inner young man or our inner young woman. Food is the most overused drug. And that's
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a trap that I fell into when I was a kid. Uh, my parents did the best they could. I love my mom
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and my dad, but they also struggle with that as well. Now using food instead of food, fueling us
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feeling the human. Yeah. And you know, what's really interesting about this is it's so difficult
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to overcome because food is everywhere, man, like everywhere, wherever you go, whether you go to
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the high school basketball game or you're driving down the road and you've got 10 convenience stores on
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one block, the cabinets are always full because we live in this time of abundance.
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It's like food is literally everywhere. So, so what do you weigh right now?
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I'm at two 15 now and I'm actually carrying probably about seven pounds that I'm in the
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process of letting go of. Um, the reason I believe the seven pounds are there is because as my workload
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is increased, I think busy parents can attest to this. I don't even have kids. Right. So a lot of
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men listen to the show. We're like, you don't even have kids, man. How can you be complaining
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about your health habits? Right. But, but I'll tell you our stuff. And so we all have our stuff.
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Right. So, so currently, you know, I'm about seven pounds where I want to be, but, um, it's
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just been this continuum of learning, right. And just listening to my body, listening to the
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inner young man. So how long did it take you to get, what's that 65 pounds? How long did it take
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you to lose that? Oh man. Well, I, the first phase was I was 22. I starved myself. Literally. I
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starved myself. I wasn't, I was eating like 13, 1500 calories a day, running marathons, running,
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like almost passing out when hanging out with friends at night. A lot of men, they just, let's
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be honest. They want to hook up. They want to feel received by the feminine. They want to have women
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in their life. And that was a big fuel for me. It's like, all right, you know what? Women never
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gave me attention. I'm going to go get me some attention. I'm going to starve myself. I'm going
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to do whatever it takes. I'm going to do anything I have to do again, though. It's coming from this
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place of tension and stress, not empowered, true masculine action. Right. And so that was my story
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back then, man, was how do I get out of this tension and fear-based approach to health and
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wellness? And how do I step into a continuum where I'm not feeling like I'm stressed out all the time
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to take care of myself, to love the inner man? So what do you, so what do you do now? You said
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you used to starve yourself. So what does this look like now? Yeah. Now it's really listening to the
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signals. Now the woo-woo piece you talked about earlier, I really don't care if it turns people off
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because this is who I am. You guys, it's listening to how you feel in your physical body,
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not masking it with alcohol, caffeine, or food or anything else. It's like, if you're tired,
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allow yourself to structure a schedule where you can take naps. And so that's what I've done. It's
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like I institute walk breaks. I use the aura ring. I use a Fitbit. I have a reminder of what's called
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rescue time on my computer. I work at a standing desk. I have a power plate vibration pad in my room.
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I use a foam roller. I have trails by my house. I've stacked everything in my environment so that it's
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constantly reminding to move. I think the number one thing for people is neat factor.
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It's non-exercise activity, thermogenesis. It's understanding that if you sit for 12 hours
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and you go hit it hard at CrossFit for one, you're not going to get the same metabolic effect as if
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you were moving continuously throughout the day. And that really comes down to ownership. It's like,
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are you going to own your environment and stack everything in your favor? You get to do that.
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Yeah. That's interesting. I mean, just from taking a walk or taking the stairs,
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we were at a big sporting goods store with my family the other day. And I noticed that everybody,
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at the sporting goods store was taking the escalator upstairs. I'm like, what the hell
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are you guys doing? Like, take the stairs. Like, and I actually beat everybody else who got on the
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escalator. So it's not like saving you any time. It's just pure laziness.
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It's so funny, Ryan, because there's a gym, there's a 24 hour fitness here in Point Loma and
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it has an escalator. Right. And I'm like, okay, there's some, it's like going into a church and
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swearing. Right. There's something really wrong here, you know? So, so I feel you on that. I think
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people get to pay attention to their environment. You know, if tactically somebody is looking for
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what's the next step towards better emotional and physical intelligence, it's take the inventory
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first and then also be responsible for your environment. Be an owner, be in true ownership of
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your environment at home. If you work from home like me or, or at your office, like don't be the
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guy that allows people around you to stack chocolate in the hallway, to go eat donuts on
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your lunch break. Like don't go there. And if you need support with that, well then go through the
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inventory. One of the things that I do, cause I work at home as well. And so I'm in, I'm in front of
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the computer all the time. Like I imagine you are. I mean, it's just the nature of the business,
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but I never take a phone call where I'm not outside walking around. Like I, I've just noticed that
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if I can go outside, get in the sun, do laps around my backyard. And we're fortunate. We've
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got a little bit of land so I can do laps in my backyard while I'm talking to somebody that
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completely transforms the next activity. When I have to come back into what I dubbed the dungeon
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and do work in front of the computer. Oh man, that's awesome. Because every man is dealing with
00:22:02.060
the stresses of our modern world. I mean, look, our current society is not stacked in our favor.
00:22:07.200
My friends, it is not every day. I think about Jack LaLanne. He was one of my original mentors and he's
00:22:12.320
like life is a battlefield. You wake up every morning and it's a war. It's literally you versus
00:22:18.600
you and you versus all the distractions and people and things that want to get in your way. And it's
00:22:24.200
not that we have to come from a war mindset, but in the undercurrent of it all, we're constantly
00:22:29.180
under siege, Ryan. We've never lived in a time where we're in this ancient brain. We have a brain
00:22:34.520
that was wired for fricking 10,000 years ago. We've only changed 1% from then from a biological
00:22:39.340
perspective. Yet we're in an environment where cell phone, advertisements, television, iPads,
00:22:45.860
Androids, people, work, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. The list goes on and on. That is a constant
00:22:51.060
drip of stress for our sympathetic nervous system. And this, I believe, is what's really driving
00:22:55.840
disease and driving men to be disconnected from their wives, from their bodies, from their health
00:23:01.700
and fitness. It's, it's, how do we silence the volume or at least turn down the volume
00:23:06.140
of these weapons of mass distraction? That's interesting. My wife actually came up to me
00:23:10.940
just a couple of days ago and I can't remember where I was going, but I was going to run an
00:23:14.700
errand in the truck. And she said, just leave your phone at home. Just leave your, don't listen to a
00:23:18.840
podcast. Don't get alerted. And she, she knows, I mean, she knows, and she was right on, you know,
00:23:24.240
just, just being able to put that away for an hour. It pays huge dividends minutes that time
00:23:31.180
of year again for the annual order of man uprising. In case you haven't heard of it,
00:23:36.480
this is a three and a half day immersive experience in the mountains of Southern Utah
00:23:40.880
designed to test, designed to test you and push you physically, mentally, emotionally. And it's going
00:23:47.640
to be held on May 3rd through the 6th, 2018. This is the only one we're going to be doing for this
00:23:53.260
year. So if you are even remotely interested, now is the time to sign up as we've already
00:23:58.800
locked in half of our spots and only started mentioning it last week. You probably heard
00:24:03.580
it last week on the podcast. All you have to do is get to Las Vegas, pretty central place.
00:24:08.240
From there, we'll pick you up. We'll take you to our lodge and spend three days working on
00:24:12.680
everything from mindset to physical fitness, to defense and survival skills, communication skills,
00:24:19.020
you name it. We're going to talk about it. And more than talk about it,
00:24:21.600
we're going to experience it in a way that's meaningful and a way that's going to help you
00:24:26.300
succeed in your life moving forward. So if you want to learn more and lock in your seat,
00:24:31.100
head to orderofman.com slash uprising. Again, that's orderofman.com slash uprising,
00:24:37.780
but do it quick as I expect to have this thing sold out very, very quickly. Again,
00:24:42.280
orderofman.com slash uprising. I hope to see you there. Now with that said,
00:24:46.900
let's get back to the conversation with Josh. One of the things you mentioned was the, uh,
00:24:52.960
the aura ring. And I think Ben Greenfield mentioned this when I did a podcast episode with him.
00:24:59.620
Aura ring is, I believe I've been in this health and wellness tech space for three and a half years
00:25:04.680
now, the most powerful wearable for true behavior change. The aura ring is a ring that you wear.
00:25:11.560
It gets your pulse right from the bottom of your middle finger or your wedding ring or whatever hand
00:25:15.600
you put it on. And it gets your skin temperature, your heart rate variability, your activity,
00:25:20.440
and most importantly, the deeper phases of your sleep. And so each day you get to wake up,
00:25:25.620
you get to check and see, Hey, how did I show up in my life yesterday? Do I need to adjust anything
00:25:30.180
on the fly? Am I not getting enough restoration in my sleep? Where do I get to go today? It's,
00:25:35.420
it's a navigator. Think of it as a human dashboard that measures how you're showing up in your life.
00:25:41.520
Interesting. I'll have to look into that. We'll, we'll link that up. Cause I think I'm going to look
00:25:44.360
into that and see if I can use that and do some experimentation for myself on that.
00:25:48.420
I think you'd really enjoy it, man. The guys, the founder is called Petri Latela. I interviewed
00:25:52.500
my wellness force and he actually, it forged from his own journey, right? His young man
00:25:56.900
didn't get the tools that he needed. And so now he's built a platform and aura to drive the change
00:26:02.600
he wants to see. And if I remember correctly, and this might be something completely different
00:26:06.780
and I'm, I'm going to butcher the terms here, but it seems like that ring doesn't emit a bunch of
00:26:12.100
microwaves or whatever it is that, that mess with all your rhythms and everything else.
00:26:16.240
Is this something else or is that the aura ring? You're on the pulse there. You can put it on
00:26:19.980
airplane mode though, and then only have it sync your data once a day. So we're talking about
00:26:24.440
a fraction of a fraction of a fraction of a percent of what's really coming out the EMF from our phones
00:26:30.240
that we have all the time. So it's very safe. So one of the things that's always struck me about
00:26:35.240
you and you and I met at the Spartan world championship, which was, I don't know what,
00:26:39.680
six months or so ago, maybe not quite that long last September. Yeah. Gosh, it has been a long
00:26:44.280
time, man. I can't believe how fast time goes. Anyways, one of the things that's always struck
00:26:47.780
me about you is, is your level of confidence. And, and every time we've had a conversation and had,
00:26:52.220
had these talks, it just exudes from you. So take that for a compliment. But at the same time,
00:26:56.360
I'm really curious if this is something that you've always possessed or have you really had to work on
00:27:02.160
this level of confidence? Talk to me about where this comes from.
00:27:04.440
Oh man, making me take a deep breath on your podcast, Ryan. Um, really the, the continuum of
00:27:11.780
learning on this stems from what I talked about earlier. And I would not say that a week goes by
00:27:17.280
without me having to have a deep and poignant conversation with that young inner man inside me,
00:27:22.660
because I believe that our monkeys never go away. I mean, I think who made that famous was Steve Young
00:27:29.140
and Joe Montana, their relationship, you know, he always felt in a way that he was a shadow of
00:27:34.620
Montana. And it's like, well, in a way I still am connected to that young kid that would eat a
00:27:40.160
burrito when he didn't feel like crying. And so, yeah, my work comes from that. And I think if people
00:27:46.760
feel confidence from me, it's because lying just makes me exhausted when I'm lying about myself,
00:27:52.660
when I'm lying to other men, when I'm lying, it is so draining and we can only continue on like that
00:27:58.280
for so long. I mean, something's got to break, right? And it's like, we're either going to break
00:28:01.820
or we're going to get a breakthrough. Something external is going to come into our lives. And so,
00:28:06.220
you know, there's many moments, Ryan, where I don't feel confident at all,
00:28:09.700
but when it comes to like time to shine and when something's on the line, as far as me helping the
00:28:15.240
change in our world that I believe is most needed, um, I'm not going to back down from that.
00:28:19.500
I'm not going to lie when I get in that situation because it's bigger than me. It's not just about me
00:28:23.700
anymore. And that's, I've really designed wellness force in my life to not be about me, man.
00:28:28.280
Cause if we allow our lives to be just about us, we're going to go down a cycle of, you know,
00:28:33.460
self-hatred, self-dialogue, self, self, self, self. And by the way, we need self-love and self-care
00:28:38.740
and self-dialogue, but that monkey mind will take us to a place that is so painful and so terrible if
00:28:44.600
we allow it to. And I think it really stems back to what was important for us in tribes. You know,
00:28:49.920
if you were in a tribe and you weren't taking care of yourself and you weren't showing up as
00:28:54.240
powerfully as possible, you were ostracized. You wouldn't be able to meet. Your lineage would
00:28:58.220
stop. And so we have this ancient brain that dictates our pathways now. And I think we're
00:29:02.940
in this time where we have such great nuanced evolutionary conversations like you and I have.
00:29:08.520
And it's like, we still get to respect that we're half beast and we're half spirit. And let's do both
00:29:14.380
of those to the best way we can. Why do you think society tries to put away that, that beast part?
00:29:19.240
Well, the big answer is that our current paradigm is run by, there is a fraction. If you look at
00:29:26.140
Jordan Peterson's work where he talks about the Pareto principle to more people that have moral
00:29:31.440
be given. I think this is actually in the Bible. And then to people that have nothing moral be taken.
00:29:35.960
Well, that Pareto principle is alive and well in our current system. That's what makes people angry at
00:29:40.820
money. That's what makes people feel resentment towards the 1% of the 1% that literally kind of run the
00:29:46.660
planet here. That is something to be said that, yes, we do have manifest destiny. We can control
00:29:53.260
our environment. We can control our fiduciary responsibility to ourselves. But there also is
00:29:58.260
something where we're in this gray area right now where the 1% of the 1% that do control the majority
00:30:04.300
of decisions in our world, that also has to change. Capitalism has to change. It has to evolve.
00:30:10.400
And it gets to because the gap is widening. And unless we want to have complete societal meltdown
00:30:15.960
in our lifetimes, Ryan, I think something drastic will change.
00:30:22.180
I see it happening through technology. So look at the work of Peter Diamandis. And we have
00:30:26.460
the X Prize. We're looking at UBI, universal basic income, and how this might possibly take care of
00:30:31.840
some of those lower level needs. If you look at Maslow's triangle, you know, safety, security.
00:30:35.980
Only can we serve other people if we're taking care of our basic human needs. What I'm not talking
00:30:41.980
about is all time, like welfare. I'm not trying to say everybody should just get a check and do
00:30:46.600
no work. No, let's set up a society where if we're going to take care of people's basic needs,
00:30:51.720
then we're going to be compensating them in some way. And they're giving back to the thing that
00:30:56.520
gave to them. Now, I don't know what the answer is for that, Ryan, but I know that's where we're
00:31:00.300
headed. Interesting. Yeah. I mean, we can go off on a tangent and talk about that.
00:31:03.540
That could be a whole other podcast. I mean, a series of podcasts. I mean,
00:31:06.820
because we're getting into some interesting territory here for sure. But I am curious because
00:31:13.100
I think that some people will use their upbringing or their past experiences or their own inadequacies
00:31:21.380
in the past and use it as, in a way, an opportunity to self-destruct. And I think other people will use
00:31:28.440
those past experiences as an opportunity for a foundation for growth. And I look at you as someone
00:31:34.840
who's used your experiences and I feel the same way about myself as an opportunity for growth.
00:31:39.240
Do you agree with that first? And then I guess secondary to that is what do you think separates
00:31:44.060
the two parties? I love this question, man. We're touching really that bleeding edge of kindness in
00:31:53.240
our society and ownership, kindness and ownership. Ownership says I get the job done. Kindness says I find
00:32:01.540
a way to get the job done while respecting my fellow man. That's the conversation that gets to
00:32:06.660
happen on a grandiose scale. And I think what I want to do is say this one thing here. We can get
00:32:13.460
the job done and still be kind to others. It is possible. The winner take all mentality, this the
00:32:19.080
Pareto principle that exists like it exists for a reason, because let's be real. That's what's wired to
00:32:24.580
that amygdala. That's what's wired to our ancient brain. But we're not ancient anymore, right? And it's
00:32:28.820
2018, man. I'm talking to you through a microphone connected to the internet that goes into outer space
00:32:32.940
and back. We are not just that caveman anymore. Let's respect our caveman. Let's be in touch with
00:32:38.580
our caveman. But let's have a conversation about ownership and kindness to our fellow man. That's
00:32:44.040
the thing I want to see change. And not only is it possible, I think it's probably the most effective
00:32:49.420
way long term to go about business, because I think you can be successful at the expense of other
00:32:55.060
people and manage to make that work for a very short period of time. But I think if you're in
00:33:00.340
this thing for the long haul, you've got to find the balance between going out and attacking what
00:33:05.040
it is you want, but doing it in a way that doesn't leave a wake of collateral damage.
00:33:10.400
Great point. And think about this. Look at the law of nature. Any tree has a start and a stop,
00:33:16.320
right? There's always a life cycle. But if you look at capitalism, capitalism is always built on year
00:33:21.900
over your growth. So we get to adjust the capitalism model so that we're serving everyone
00:33:26.980
and we're more in alignment with the law of nature. Now, how do we do that? Let's figure it
00:33:30.660
out together, man, because I don't have clarity, but we get to go in that direction more.
00:33:35.000
I love it, man. I love it. So I want to shift gears here a little bit. And I'm enjoying this
00:33:39.560
conversation. We're talking about everything. I'm a little nervous because I'm not sure what I'm
00:33:42.940
going to title this podcast because we're all over the place, but it's okay. It's still a worthy
00:33:47.980
conversation for sure. Uh, one of the things that I saw that you had just done, and I don't know when
00:33:52.840
this was, uh, but the, uh, the 20 X Mark devines 20 X, and he's been on the, uh, he's been on the
00:33:58.160
show unbeatable mind. I know a lot of guys are familiar with his work. Why did you sign up for
00:34:03.020
an event like that? Oh man, forging wellness force and driving wellness force has been the best
00:34:08.840
blessing in my life, but it's also been the most challenging. It's brought up all my BS, all my inner
00:34:13.820
stories, uh, worthiness, things like this. So throughout my whole life, uh, because of what
00:34:18.400
I talked about, I have struggled with anxiety and a lot of men struggle with anxiety, especially men
00:34:23.640
that want to make an impact. And so I've struggled with anxiety and in 2015, 2016, that multiplied in
00:34:30.220
driving a business. So by the time 2017 came around, it was actually at the in beetle mind retreat in
00:34:35.540
December of 2016. I was listening to Mark talk on stage and he was asking us like, what wolf are you
00:34:41.900
feeding? Are you feeding the wolf every day that says anger, jealousy, despair, sadness,
00:34:47.920
or are you feeding a wolf that says abundance? What's possible courage, like feed the courage
00:34:53.500
wolf. And as I was reading his work and studying him, I'd had him on the podcast too. And I just got
00:34:59.420
impacted by him so much. I thought, you know what? I wonder what I'm capable of physically. I wonder if
00:35:03.780
I took myself to a place physically that was literally 20 times more than I ever thought I could
00:35:08.860
do. What would come up for me emotionally? And that was the quest that I went on with the 20 X.
00:35:13.800
What did you discover about that versus the expectations you had going into it?
00:35:18.900
The biggest one was I really took an inventory that had nothing to do with anything other than
00:35:25.860
my deepest truth. And my deepest truth that came up from the 20 X, we actually did a really cool
00:35:30.580
storytelling video about it. I can send you. It's like at the end of the video, I shook the coach's
00:35:34.920
hand and I looked at them and I was like, thank you for making me realize that my life is not just
00:35:40.460
about me. I am not allowed to be selfish anymore and saturate myself in these negative emotions and
00:35:47.680
the victim story. And honestly, the monkey mind, like I'm not allowed to go there. And if I want to
00:35:52.640
go there, then I immediately get to recognize I'm there and then call in the support because
00:35:56.640
I don't get to be selfish. And this isn't about just me. And I think that was the biggest wake up
00:36:01.300
call, man. It's like when you're suffering with these men and women, by the way, who do the event,
00:36:05.300
there's nowhere to hide. Your BS is going to come out. I got singled out. I dropped my sandbag
00:36:10.160
and he announced my name over the loudspeaker. He's like, Trent, everybody's doing 40 burpees
00:36:13.900
because of you. And I literally just lost connection with the people I was, I was working with. And by the
00:36:19.520
way, it's 50 degrees. We're soaking wet. Our bodies are shivering to the point where we couldn't even like
00:36:24.260
eat the MRE. Like we're shivering. I couldn't even put the food in my mouth. You will never know where
00:36:29.240
you'll go until you're under that kind of stress until you're under that kind of physical load,
00:36:33.520
because whatever happens in your daily life, when you're stressed out about work or fighting with
00:36:37.860
your wife or anything that's stressing you out, you'll go there 10 times, 20 times over when you're
00:36:43.280
physically suffering. So whatever BS comes up in your regular life as a man, it's a magnifying glass to
00:36:48.780
work through that in an event like the 20 X. That's interesting. I actually had a similar
00:36:52.700
experience. I did the Spartan Agogi, which is a 60 hour endurance event. And it's insane. I mean,
00:36:57.880
it's absolutely insane, but you walk away a completely, a completely new person. And if
00:37:02.420
I remember right, what did you say? 13 or 14 hours? Is that right? And it's, and it's based on,
00:37:06.920
is it based on seal training? Cause Mark Devine is a seal commander. So is it, is it a seal type
00:37:11.900
training? Is that what it is? Yeah. So the crucible is, I don't want to spoil it for everyone that gets
00:37:17.540
in there, but however, we do do Murph, which is a hundred pull-ups, 200 push-ups, 300 air squats.
00:37:23.400
We do that about halfway through the event in soaking wet clothing.
00:37:27.440
I mean, most people can't do that in the perfect of conditions.
00:37:31.620
Well, with Murph, you get to pause. So it's not like you have to bang out 200 push-ups all at once,
00:37:35.760
but like, it'll still rock your core. It's no laughing matter, but, but also to think about this,
00:37:42.000
whatever the coaches find in you, that's your weakness. They're going to dig into it.
00:37:47.720
They will dig into whatever they find out about you. And for me, it was selfishness,
00:37:52.240
right? And so that's what I got to learn. That's what I got to sit with and digest. And it's like,
00:37:56.560
ah, how do I make my life? Not about me. You know, how do I respect the beast,
00:38:02.720
And how has your life changed after an event like that?
00:38:05.940
I would say biggest way it's changed is this continuous openness, a continuous openness to
00:38:12.060
are my actions is my mission is what I'm up to in the world, truly affecting others in a way where
00:38:18.860
I believe that their life is better because of it. And that's not always an easy thing to do. It's
00:38:24.340
like sometimes you get to really take an inventory and go, wow, my actions are not affecting my community
00:38:29.740
or my family or people in the way that I want. And you must choose in that moment. You get to choose
00:38:34.320
in that moment to change it. So I think what it really did, honestly, man, is kind of crack me open
00:38:38.580
like a coconut and let some of the toxicity pour out. And that toxicity was, you know,
00:38:43.480
the fear wolf, the wolf that says be selfish. How do you find the balance between, and this is
00:38:48.440
going back to something you said earlier, which is the ability to take care of yourself. And then
00:38:52.540
this other side of things, which is to serve and to give and not to be selfish to the other people
00:38:57.940
around you. I think it's been a continuous narrative. You know, I hate to go back to just this
00:39:06.620
reductionistic explanation for you and the audience here, but it's like, I can't single
00:39:11.900
out one thing. It's more around, will I continue to choose to be open to a continuous inventory of
00:39:19.000
how I'm showing up, of what's going on with me? And then am I also too, this is a big one. Am I
00:39:23.800
willing to be vulnerable with the men that I trust? Am I willing to talk about the question you just
00:39:29.160
asked me with the men that I trust? Have you been able to do that?
00:39:34.820
It's funny this week we actually just met and I was telling them about a strain in business that
00:39:39.780
I was going through. And, uh, I just let myself cry for a second. You know, it wasn't like a 14,
00:39:45.180
15 minute cry, but it's like, sometimes as men, like our greatest fear around crying is that we're
00:39:49.340
going to be seen as weak. But what's interesting is if you just choose to let yourself cry in a
00:39:54.000
trusted space, like in a men's group, they, you can go kick ass in the rest of your life.
00:39:59.740
Just to have the outlet. But, but what happens is that we do have kind of like the narrative that
00:40:04.520
says, if a man cries, then he's a, he's a wuss, which that's absolutely not true as well.
00:40:09.060
Yeah. I mean, yeah, there's always, of course we, we have emotions, right? We're human beings. I
00:40:12.940
think like, like you said earlier, you know, trying to hide those things doesn't do any justice. In fact,
00:40:16.920
I look at emotions as, as a powerful tool. I mean, really it's an indicator for
00:40:21.960
things that are working well in your life or things aren't working well. And don't you want
00:40:26.800
to know that? So if you're having what most people would consider quote unquote negative emotions,
00:40:31.800
like grief, guilt, sorrow, remorse, well, those are great things because then you can recognize
00:40:37.580
and pinpoint why you're experiencing those things and then fix the problem. Hopefully that's the
00:40:42.800
objective. Yeah. It's almost like a barometer, right? It's saying, Hey, we have a dashboard on our
00:40:48.520
car. I think what's missing from our current society is like, where's our emotional dashboard?
00:40:53.600
Like, how do we tactically manage our emotions, allow ourselves to feel them and then kick the
00:40:58.080
ones out that don't have any meaning? Yeah. I mean, it's interesting. You use that analogy.
00:41:01.840
I actually use that in the book, the analogy in the book. And I talk about the fuel gauge,
00:41:05.700
you know, if your fuel gauge hits, hits empty and you run out of gas on the road, you're not mad at
00:41:11.460
the car for running out of gas. You're mad at yourself for not filling up before you left.
00:41:15.720
And it's such a good analogy, man. I'm stoked on your book, by the way, I get to,
00:41:19.660
I'm going to read this book and do a review. Good. Yeah. That'd be awesome. Well, Hey man,
00:41:23.020
we're bumping up against time here. I can't believe how fast this has gone and always appreciate your
00:41:27.360
energy. Let's ask a couple of questions as we wind down. The first one I know you're familiar
00:41:31.460
with is what does it mean to be a man? What it means to be a man has changed, but at its core remains
00:41:39.260
the same. It is, can you own your life in all ways, you know, relationship in wealth and in your
00:41:46.960
physical health. And also can you hold space for the feminine? Can you truly hold space for the
00:41:53.340
feminine? And that has a couple of parts. It's, can you work on your patients on a continuous basis?
00:41:59.080
Can you work on your emotional intelligence? You know, do I, do you fly off the handle? Do you try
00:42:03.500
to solve your wife's problems or your girlfriend's problems instead of just being there and letting
00:42:08.380
her talk? It's the ownership and it's the holding of the space that I believe is the fortification of
00:42:14.380
what masculinity needs right now in the world the most. Powerful man. Powerful stuff. Well,
00:42:20.560
brother, how do we connect with you? Where do we find out more about what you're doing and where do we
00:42:23.940
direct the guys? Yeah. Just awesome. Loved the questions, Ryan. It's just so on point, man. I did not
00:42:29.700
tell that you're under the weather at all. Good, good. Maybe I'll edit that out and we won't let
00:42:33.460
anybody know. Yeah. So wellnessforce.com, wellnessforce, all over social. And, you know,
00:42:39.600
we explored this physical and this emotional as Ryan had come on the show and we talked about
00:42:44.220
masculine and feminine as well. So, you know, allow yourself to explore some of these concepts,
00:42:48.360
like don't be afraid to dig into emotion and trust yourself to know what serves you and what
00:42:52.620
doesn't. And it's wellnessforce.com. Right on, man. We'll link that all up. We'll send the guys there
00:42:57.000
as always. And I've mentioned this before already in this interview, appreciate the energy
00:43:00.600
and the enthusiasm for what you're doing and your level of preparation, man. I've always been blown
00:43:05.160
away with that as well. I know when I came on and how well you were prepared and how well you're
00:43:08.880
prepared for this conversation is, is evident. So I want to let you know, I appreciate you and the way
00:43:13.180
you show up and looking forward to building a friendship with you, man. Likewise, Ryan. Thank
00:43:16.640
you so much, man. Gentlemen, there it is my conversation with Josh Trent. Like I said before,
00:43:22.020
I always appreciate anyone who is fired up about life and the impact that he is making. And I think
00:43:27.880
you can probably agree that describes Josh, uh, if you'd like to learn more about what he's up to
00:43:32.640
connect with him and make sure you share this guys. I don't ask that you do a whole lot around here,
00:43:37.140
but if you are gaining any insight, any value from the guests that we bring on each and every week
00:43:42.860
and the value that we are providing, you can do one of three things. Subscribe to this podcast.
00:43:48.860
That goes a long ways. Leave an iTunes rating and review. I know a lot of you have, but that also goes
00:43:54.360
the long way and share it. Just share the show with somebody that you know, that could benefit
00:43:59.200
from what we're doing, or you can do all three of those things. Very simple guys. And while you're
00:44:04.000
at it, hit me and Josh up on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, wherever you may be. Let us know
00:44:10.300
what you thought about the show. And again, I say this every week, specifically what you're going to
00:44:14.460
do in your life differently. Having heard this conversation, knowledge, isn't power knowledge
00:44:20.620
applied is. So we love to hear from you guys as far as what you are applying in your life.
00:44:26.560
And also, like I mentioned a couple of times throughout the show, please go ahead and take
00:44:29.640
a look at the uprising, which again, is going to be held on May 3rd through the 6th, 2018.
00:44:35.020
You can go to order of man.com slash uprising to learn more about what we're going to do.
00:44:39.560
It is not going to disclose everything that we're going to do. There's an element of surprise to it.
00:44:45.020
Now that's part of the experience. That's part of the adventure, but it'll give you enough
00:44:48.640
information to make a decision that you probably will want to attend this thing.
00:44:51.980
You can lock in your spot again at order of man.com slash uprising. We only have those 10 or 11 spots
00:44:58.760
or so. So make sure that you get on it quick. With that said, guys, I will sign out today. I
00:45:02.900
appreciate you being on this path, you being on this journey, us standing shoulder to shoulder in
00:45:07.880
this thing and reclaiming what it means to be a man. The world needs it now more than ever.
00:45:12.440
We absolutely could not do this without you guys. So I'm glad you're part of the order
00:45:16.220
until Friday, take action and become the man you are meant to be.
00:45:21.340
Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your
00:45:25.620
life and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.
00:45:38.660
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00:45:40.000
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