Order of Man - April 17, 2018


161: Saved From Success | Dale Partridge


Episode Stats

Length

48 minutes

Words per Minute

199.68373

Word Count

9,639

Sentence Count

620

Misogynist Sentences

2

Hate Speech Sentences

9


Summary

In this episode, Ryan Michler sits down with Dale Partridge to discuss his new book, "Save From Success" and why we should all be trying to learn how to be a better man. They discuss Dale's definition of success compared to society's, why men are hesitant to surrender to a higher power, how to develop a life of significance and meaning, and how we can all be saved from success.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Today, we talk about something we've never directly addressed on this podcast, God.
00:00:04.600 Now, before you tune me out, based on that word alone, I believe that regardless of what
00:00:08.980 you believe, there is something to be learned in every conversation and every experience.
00:00:13.600 That's why when my friend Dale Partridge reached out to talk about his new book, Save
00:00:17.500 From Success, I knew I needed to have him on.
00:00:20.380 At the risk of losing a few listeners and receiving a few disapproving emails, I thought
00:00:25.300 this was a conversation worth having.
00:00:27.120 We talk about Dale's definition of success compared to much of society's, why men are
00:00:32.020 hesitant to surrender to a higher power, how to develop a life of significance and meaning,
00:00:37.160 and how we ourselves can be saved from success.
00:00:39.860 You're a man of action.
00:00:41.360 You live life to the fullest, embrace your fears, and boldly chart your own path.
00:00:45.720 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time, every time.
00:00:50.180 You are not easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong.
00:00:55.260 This is your life.
00:00:56.340 This is who you are.
00:00:57.780 This is who you will become at the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you
00:01:02.700 can call yourself a man.
00:01:05.080 Gentlemen, what is going on today?
00:01:06.380 My name is Ryan Michler, and I am the host and the founder of this podcast, The Order
00:01:10.660 of Man.
00:01:11.240 It's not only a podcast, guys.
00:01:12.680 It's a movement.
00:01:13.440 We've got a blog.
00:01:14.200 We've got a Facebook group.
00:01:15.300 We're on other social media profiles.
00:01:17.540 We've got a brotherhood.
00:01:18.340 We have got so much going on, and frankly, it's become more than what I thought it would
00:01:23.160 three short years ago.
00:01:24.300 Again, this is a movement.
00:01:25.460 It's a movement to impact millions of men across the planet and in turn impact families
00:01:31.000 and communities and businesses, and every single one of you who is listening to this
00:01:36.080 is part of that.
00:01:37.300 You are part of this movement.
00:01:39.040 I want to thank you.
00:01:39.940 I want to welcome you.
00:01:41.060 If you've been around for three years or so, I'm glad that you're here.
00:01:44.620 If you're just joining us for the first time today, I am also glad that you're here.
00:01:48.340 If you don't already know, again, a show about being a better man, we are interviewing some
00:01:52.600 of the world's most successful men.
00:01:54.600 What I do on a daily basis is I go out into the world, onto the internet.
00:01:58.500 I find guys who are thriving, warriors, athletes, scholars, New York Times, bestselling authors,
00:02:04.360 entrepreneurs, you name it.
00:02:05.760 If they have an interesting story about becoming a better man, about overcoming odds and trials
00:02:11.540 and improving their lives, then I want to interview those guys because what we are doing
00:02:15.680 is we're extracting their lessons, their wisdom, their experiences.
00:02:19.500 We're distilling that information down into a relatively short amount of timeframe in this
00:02:23.540 podcast and again, delivering it straight to you.
00:02:26.620 So again, welcome.
00:02:27.640 And if you would guys, please, if you would go ahead and share this show, share it with
00:02:31.400 a friend, a colleague, a neighbor, a brother, a coworker, and then also leave us a review.
00:02:35.460 That is how we get the word out about what we're doing.
00:02:37.800 And this is a grassroots movement.
00:02:39.160 So this has grown primarily from word of mouth, from guys like yourselves sharing this with
00:02:45.680 other men that, you know, and man, we all know that we need more guys in this fight of
00:02:50.260 reclaiming masculinity.
00:02:51.700 Now I do want to get into the show, but before I do a couple of quick announcements, I want
00:02:55.840 to introduce you to our show sponsors.
00:02:57.740 We couldn't do this show without them as well.
00:03:00.040 The first is NetSuite by Oracle.
00:03:01.820 You've heard me talk about them before.
00:03:03.060 This is not some one size fits all software with industry specific support for a wide
00:03:09.420 range of businesses.
00:03:10.720 NetSuite works the way that your business works and the way that my business works.
00:03:14.800 They show you everything about your business.
00:03:16.580 It's revenues, expenses, customers, orders, e-commerce, and it's all in real time right
00:03:22.560 now.
00:03:23.100 NetSuite is over 10 times the size of its closest competitor, meaning that you'll have more than
00:03:27.500 10 times the resources working for you.
00:03:29.700 So if you are interested in learning how to get control of your business and focusing,
00:03:34.620 frankly, on the things that you want to focus on rather than the backend stuff, head to NetSuite
00:03:39.500 to get your free guide.
00:03:41.420 It's called crushing the five barriers to growth.
00:03:43.540 It's at NetSuite.com slash man.
00:03:46.680 Again, you can download their free crushing the five barriers to growth guide today at NetSuite.com
00:03:51.920 slash man, NetSuite.com slash man.
00:03:54.940 And our second sponsor is one I've been talking about over the past couple of weeks.
00:03:58.520 It's origin, Maine.
00:03:59.420 These are guys with an incredible, incredible story and a desire to take back American manufacturing.
00:04:05.040 Everything they make is 100% made in America without compromise.
00:04:09.620 For our jujitsu listeners, they have geese, rash guards, compression pants.
00:04:14.440 They've got training gear.
00:04:15.680 And one of the things I've been using a lot of is their nutritional supplemental line.
00:04:20.100 This is Jocko's line.
00:04:21.060 I know a lot of you guys have seen this, probably listened to Jocko's show.
00:04:24.400 Uh, it's the super krill.
00:04:26.080 It's the joint warfare.
00:04:27.360 And then their supplemental drink, which is called discipline.
00:04:30.400 So go check everything out today.
00:04:32.360 Origin, Maine, Maine is in the state Maine.
00:04:34.420 So origin, Maine.com slash order of man and use order and all caps, O-R-D-E-R all caps
00:04:41.260 at checkout.
00:04:42.100 And you're going to get 5% off of your order.
00:04:44.760 Again, that's origin, Maine.com slash order of man and use an all caps order O-R-D-E-R for
00:04:51.620 a 5% discount.
00:04:53.420 So there it is guys, our two show sponsors.
00:04:55.280 Again, want to thank them for sponsoring the show.
00:04:57.340 Now today I have the honor of introducing you to my friend and a repeat guest, Dale
00:05:02.020 Partridge.
00:05:02.720 I had him on the show in June.
00:05:05.060 I believe it was June of last year.
00:05:06.900 He talked about turning your passion into your profession.
00:05:09.580 It was a great interview, a lot of great feedback from that one.
00:05:13.060 And about a month or so ago, he reached out to me regarding his new book and I thought
00:05:17.680 it would make for, let's call it an interesting conversation.
00:05:21.280 For those of you who may not know, uh, Dale is an extremely successful entrepreneur and
00:05:25.760 the founder of startup camp.
00:05:27.420 And what they do at startup camp is teach aspiring entrepreneurs, the ropes, the ins
00:05:31.620 and outs when it comes to building businesses.
00:05:34.260 I've been following him and his message for a long time.
00:05:37.280 And him and I have managed to build a friendship through our mutual work and calling men, frankly,
00:05:41.700 to step up and be men in their homes, their communities, their businesses, and every facet
00:05:47.040 of their lives.
00:05:49.040 Dale, what's going on, man?
00:05:50.100 Thanks for joining me for round two of the discussion.
00:05:52.540 Dude, I am super stoked to be back with you.
00:05:55.120 I'm just glad you're feeling better.
00:05:56.180 I know last week you were, uh, you were down and out last week, man.
00:05:59.280 I learned why the flu is killing people last week and it was super intense.
00:06:04.360 And yeah, if I wasn't a man in my thirties, uh, if I was a man in my seventies, I can understand
00:06:10.080 why people could die.
00:06:10.940 It was really intense, had a fever for 11 days, but it feels good to be back in action and
00:06:16.200 my body working again.
00:06:17.420 I'm blown away.
00:06:18.640 You told me that 4,000 people a week, I think that's what you said.
00:06:22.360 4,000 people a week are dying from the flu.
00:06:24.980 Yeah.
00:06:25.160 It is a scary stat.
00:06:26.540 I actually didn't tell my wife that during the flu.
00:06:29.160 I'm sure.
00:06:29.760 Just cause I wanted to shield her heart from the fear of that.
00:06:32.080 But like, you know, USA Today rolled that out and a New York times did an article.
00:06:36.520 So I'm thinking, okay, they, they, these people have probably done their research, but yeah,
00:06:39.340 that's a scary number.
00:06:40.120 And it's obviously mostly older people and mostly, you know, babies.
00:06:43.520 Sure.
00:06:43.740 Sure.
00:06:44.320 But, but I had an eight month old who had the flu with us.
00:06:46.380 So it was, it was real deal.
00:06:48.120 You have two kids, right?
00:06:49.500 We have three.
00:06:50.100 Yeah.
00:06:50.280 So we got, we got a four year old, a two year old and an eight month old.
00:06:54.120 And my wife were all down.
00:06:55.820 All five of us were down.
00:06:58.000 It was, I'm not kidding.
00:06:59.340 I definitely cried.
00:07:00.440 I got to the point where we were down for 20 days.
00:07:03.660 I got to a point where I was going, all right, Lord, what are you teaching me here?
00:07:06.640 Because I felt definitely weak and useless for a few days.
00:07:10.980 What was the answer to that question?
00:07:12.340 I just felt like God was going, I want you to know what it feels like to be hopeless for
00:07:17.080 a moment so that you can understand and empathize with the people that you're going to walk to.
00:07:22.100 I've kind of sit more in a pastoral role.
00:07:24.580 You know, I talk about manhood and these different things, but I come from it from a more,
00:07:27.500 you know, pastoral Christian perspective.
00:07:30.540 And to be reminded of, of there's people that live like this all the time.
00:07:35.100 Like this is their reality.
00:07:36.300 They are sick.
00:07:37.180 They are terminal.
00:07:38.340 And there was a moment of hopelessness that I just go, everybody was getting better but
00:07:42.940 me and I was getting worse.
00:07:44.740 And I was in the hospital again and had to get a CT scan because they were worried that
00:07:49.120 I had a pulmonary embolism.
00:07:50.360 And it was just a moment of just going, weakness is the position and the posture that God loves
00:07:56.160 us in, in terms of, because that's where he can be strong.
00:07:59.780 And we have to rely on him and not our own strength.
00:08:02.180 And it was, it was a humbling moment to say the least.
00:08:04.500 You use the term walk to.
00:08:05.720 What do you mean by that?
00:08:06.360 You said the people that I walk to.
00:08:08.160 Just in terms of, maybe I should say walk with, but in terms of a pastoral figure, right?
00:08:13.380 As I'm walking with other families, I know I will be confronted at some point with people
00:08:18.280 who are walking in deep waters with sickness and illness and the way that they feel.
00:08:22.980 And when you're, you know, 14 days in, you get to that point where you go, I'm starting
00:08:27.920 to know this.
00:08:29.020 Like this is starting to create a culture in the way that I think and behave for a, on a
00:08:32.760 daily basis.
00:08:33.260 I've never been sick that long.
00:08:34.320 I've been sick, you know, three, four or five days, but to have a fever for 11 days
00:08:38.500 and to be down after that for several more days, like it's just something, it does something
00:08:42.800 to you.
00:08:43.120 It takes you to a place that you haven't been.
00:08:45.240 I think this is a really interesting segue and I, and I hate to say that it worked out
00:08:48.740 in our favor for this, for this conversation, obviously I don't wish that upon anybody,
00:08:52.840 but it's really interesting because you wrote a new book called save from success.
00:08:57.100 And one of the things that really stood out to me was, was this term, the word success
00:09:00.800 has been hijacked.
00:09:02.080 And I bet in a moment, like you've dealt with over the past several weeks, that the definition
00:09:07.300 of success has been tested.
00:09:10.180 I'll say, I don't want to put words in your mouth, but I'd really like to hear your perspective
00:09:13.120 on what it means to be successful because it probably changes when you're in a situation
00:09:17.360 like that.
00:09:17.880 And I, I've been to Iraq and certainly it changes in a situation like that, but I'm
00:09:22.660 curious what you have to say.
00:09:24.160 Yeah.
00:09:24.200 I mean, the book ultimately shows the two different sides of success in terms of what true success
00:09:29.580 is from my definition and what I would say the definition is from the Bible or from a
00:09:34.080 Christian perspective and the definition that culture has adopted.
00:09:38.100 You know, I actually end the book with, with a statement.
00:09:40.520 And I say, culture's distorted definition of success will leave you vacant, broken and
00:09:46.420 washing up against the rocks of an empty glass.
00:09:49.140 That has been my experience.
00:09:50.480 I mean, really, Ryan, this book is about closing the gap between what you say you believe and
00:09:56.860 how you live.
00:09:57.960 That is really about integrity, right?
00:10:00.020 And so I challenge a lot of people about, I go, okay, what you say you believe and how are
00:10:06.020 you living the other big question this book asks Ryan is, is the culture's definition
00:10:11.620 of success something to seek after or to be saved from?
00:10:15.840 That's something that we need to evaluate.
00:10:17.640 And right out of the gate, this book forces the reader to define where they get their sense
00:10:23.620 of morality because success implies what we ought to do, right?
00:10:29.060 And if you've studied philosophy, the word ought really drives you straight into the morality
00:10:33.720 conversation.
00:10:34.620 In other words, what is right and what is wrong?
00:10:37.260 Because success implies, you know, we're going to chase this direction because it is right.
00:10:42.500 So those that are listening right now, how are you defining what is right and wrong?
00:10:46.900 Is it by your emotions?
00:10:48.700 Is it by your experiences?
00:10:50.260 Is it science?
00:10:51.640 Or is it by consensus morality?
00:10:54.040 That's where if enough people believe it's to be right, then you believe it's right.
00:10:59.100 You know, so that's a lot of people have these different things.
00:11:01.700 Again, my philosophy is this book is really based off of the Bible, right?
00:11:07.140 And for those of you that are uncomfortable with that in terms of just feeling like it's
00:11:11.180 going to be a preachy book, it's whether you believe the Bible or not, the Bible is an
00:11:14.800 incredible book.
00:11:15.920 Right.
00:11:16.100 There's so much to be learned from that, whether it's fiction or nonfiction.
00:11:19.220 Yeah.
00:11:19.400 And so, you know, I actually had a gentleman a couple of weeks ago ask me this question.
00:11:24.060 Why the Bible?
00:11:24.720 Why are you basing this whole book off the Bible?
00:11:26.760 Why do you base your whole life?
00:11:28.100 You trust everything in the Bible.
00:11:29.540 You're banking your eternity on the words of this book.
00:11:33.020 He really challenged me to kind of come up with a legitimate answer to that question
00:11:37.220 and not just like, oh, because I believe it's true.
00:11:40.020 You know, like that's what most people say.
00:11:41.760 And so I thought about it and I realized that first off, I believe that truth as a category
00:11:47.500 does exist.
00:11:49.060 And the reason I say that is because, Ryan, let's just say that I said, hey, Ryan, I want
00:11:53.100 you to leave your studio and I want you to open up the front door of your studio.
00:11:56.940 There's going to be a red ball on the floor.
00:11:59.520 And you walked out and you open up that door and indeed there was a red ball on the floor.
00:12:04.520 Would that have been a true statement that I said to you?
00:12:06.540 Yes, because we know that truth can exist.
00:12:11.240 And ultimately, we as humans have the ability to evaluate if something is true or if something
00:12:17.700 is false.
00:12:18.320 Now, we determine truth or lies all the time, just determining if something makes sense
00:12:23.760 or something doesn't make sense.
00:12:25.200 And we do that two ways.
00:12:26.860 We define if something is true based off of confirmations, accuracies, reason, and harmonies.
00:12:33.620 So that's what we're doing when we evaluate if someone's lying to us or if what was said
00:12:39.460 was true or someone makes a claim.
00:12:41.860 We're looking for confirmations, accuracies, reasons, and harmonies.
00:12:45.120 What do you mean by harmonies?
00:12:46.180 What does that pertain to?
00:12:47.940 I mean, it works together.
00:12:49.760 It just naturally feels like they're playing with each other, not against each other, right?
00:12:54.940 Okay.
00:12:55.420 Yeah, makes sense.
00:12:56.000 That's how we do that.
00:12:56.520 So we look at those things.
00:12:57.260 Now, the way that we tell if something is false or unreliable is contradictions, conflicts,
00:13:04.020 clashes, and failures.
00:13:05.920 Okay.
00:13:06.540 So we have two ways to evaluate truth right there, right?
00:13:09.360 Confirmation, accuracies, reasons, and harmonies.
00:13:11.300 And then the second group is contradictions, conflicts, clashes, and failures.
00:13:15.300 So I think about this and I'm evaluating this question this gentleman asked me.
00:13:19.560 So the Bible, right?
00:13:20.480 It's 66 books written by 40 different authors over a 1,500-year period telling one pretty incredible
00:13:25.760 unified story, ultimately ending with Jesus.
00:13:28.900 Now, this is the pinnacle statement I have, Ryan, right here, is that now if the Bible made
00:13:33.640 several assertions, one after another after another, that were false in history, that were
00:13:40.860 false in philosophy, that were false in theology, and you have such a level of systemic contradiction
00:13:48.280 and failure, then you have reason to believe that the Bible is untrue.
00:13:52.460 That's how we just have to look at it from a pragmatic statement.
00:13:55.440 And this is what I was doing, even when I was kind of evaluating the reliability of what
00:14:00.420 I'm writing.
00:14:01.140 The problem is, that's just not the case.
00:14:03.020 The harmony of the Bible is actually quite impeccable if you've read it.
00:14:06.240 Not many people have, like cover to cover.
00:14:08.180 The unity is almost eerie.
00:14:09.980 I mean, there's no other ancient book that is aligned so accurately represented with ancient
00:14:14.320 archaeology.
00:14:15.460 There's literally, I found this out, Ryan, there's modern images of choralized chariots
00:14:21.660 lining the bottom of the Red Sea, matching up perfectly with the story of Moses, like
00:14:27.280 splitting the Red Sea.
00:14:28.760 Really?
00:14:29.180 Currently, right now, there's chariots in the middle of the Red Sea lining up like as if
00:14:33.880 they were riding across the bottom of the Red Sea, and they're all lined up as an army.
00:14:38.960 Interesting.
00:14:39.860 There's so many archaeological things like that, that, again, have these confirmations,
00:14:44.140 accuracies, reasons, and harmonies.
00:14:45.980 Time is based off of the events of the Bible, right?
00:14:48.860 The word AD, Anno Domini, means the year of our Lord.
00:14:52.320 Like, the reason it's 2018 is based off of the main character of the Bible's life.
00:14:57.660 Right.
00:14:58.280 Right?
00:14:58.460 You know, there's no other book that has predicted the future over and over again from
00:15:04.520 the prophecies of Daniel and Isaiah and David to Jeremiah.
00:15:06.900 When you see the prophetic schema from Adam to the patriarchs to the prophets all the way
00:15:12.260 down to Jesus, you immediately start to see the supernatural.
00:15:15.100 You go, holy crap.
00:15:16.760 Like, when you start reading this book, you just go, whoa, this is wild.
00:15:20.440 On the other side is you can't talk about, you can also talk about the unarguable fruitfulness
00:15:24.460 of just following the Bible, meaning, like, my parents got a vicious divorce.
00:15:28.520 If they would have followed the Bible, that wouldn't have happened.
00:15:30.820 You know, my brother at a time was addicted to drugs.
00:15:33.860 If he would have followed the Bible, that would not have happened.
00:15:35.900 You know, I had anger issues and was a workaholic.
00:15:38.780 If I would have followed the words of the Bible, that wouldn't have happened.
00:15:41.420 Divorce, adultery, racism, human trafficking, all crime are a result of people who have chosen
00:15:46.560 to not follow the Bible.
00:15:48.900 Billy Graham just passed away.
00:15:50.160 The whole world's seen this, right?
00:15:51.920 Right.
00:15:52.020 And the Bible is the world's bestseller.
00:15:55.680 I don't care if you're a New York Times bestseller.
00:15:57.620 I'm talking hundreds of millions of copies.
00:16:01.200 And Billy Graham had said this fascinating quote.
00:16:03.520 He said, it's been ridiculed, burned, refuted, destroyed, but it lives on.
00:16:08.740 The Bible is the anvil that has worn out many hammers.
00:16:12.420 Hmm.
00:16:13.040 Interesting.
00:16:13.880 I want to say that as we start our conversation, because I'm not just choosing the Bible because
00:16:19.160 I have an emotional connection or spiritual connection with it.
00:16:22.260 The reason I wrote this book is based off of the principle of the Bible, because I believe
00:16:26.600 the Bible is true because I've evaluated its confirmations, accuracies, reasons, and harmonies.
00:16:32.160 Sure, there's a spiritual element to that.
00:16:33.820 But when we just have that conversation first, then you and I, Ryan, could go into a conversation
00:16:38.500 about going whether you believe the Bible to be true in terms of its claims about who Jesus
00:16:43.020 is or not, the Bible has an incredible information for men to be great leaders and to live great
00:16:49.220 lives.
00:16:50.120 Well, and I agree with that.
00:16:50.920 And I believe that.
00:16:51.540 I want to go back actually to something you said a minute ago, which is that there's a
00:16:54.860 gap, right?
00:16:55.600 There's a gap between the way that we, and I can't remember exactly what you said, but
00:16:59.860 the way we know we should be living.
00:17:01.260 Between what we believe.
00:17:02.240 There you go.
00:17:02.620 Yeah, and how we live.
00:17:03.320 So why does that gap then exist?
00:17:05.520 And this is a question I've asked a lot of people because I agree that gap is prevalent in
00:17:10.040 the guys that are listening to this in my life, I'm sure to a degree in your life as
00:17:13.000 well.
00:17:13.220 There's always some sort of gap there.
00:17:14.820 Why does this exist?
00:17:16.660 I mean, it's integrity.
00:17:17.940 The gap is very much integrity.
00:17:20.100 And so, you know, when you say what you do and you do what you say, that is just someone
00:17:23.560 that's an honorable, integrity-driven person.
00:17:26.560 And there's a variety of other reasons why those gaps might be there.
00:17:29.680 It might be that you're afraid to actually walk out what you say you believe.
00:17:33.640 You don't actually believe what you say you believe.
00:17:36.020 So there's a false reality in terms of how you live.
00:17:40.660 And again, this is ultimately the grand narrative of this book for me is that I started realizing,
00:17:46.420 I go, I believe these certain things about the Bible, but I actually wasn't walking them
00:17:50.460 out.
00:17:51.000 And instead, I was actually walking out a different lifestyle, a lifestyle that is very common
00:17:55.360 to the culture, but it's not normal.
00:17:58.280 And I say that because just because something is common doesn't mean that it's normal.
00:18:04.560 Now, who is to define what is normal?
00:18:07.080 Again, I'm going to go back to the Bible because I believe the Bible defines what is normal.
00:18:11.460 See, it's very common for you to get a divorce.
00:18:15.720 It's not normal to get a divorce.
00:18:18.160 Sure.
00:18:18.280 Okay.
00:18:18.700 Makes sense.
00:18:19.120 It's very common to have disobedient children who disrespect you.
00:18:22.680 It is not normal.
00:18:24.920 You should have, as a father, you should have children who love you, who respect you, who
00:18:28.880 actually fear you in a healthy fear, but you shouldn't have terrible children.
00:18:33.780 That is common, but it's not normal.
00:18:36.720 So again, I'm trying to take this book and remind people what is normal about marriage,
00:18:42.780 about children, about freedom, about relationships, about money, about some of these very basic
00:18:50.220 things and going, okay, as a Christian person or someone who's willing to look at the scriptures
00:18:56.100 or look at the Bible, am I willing to actually live out what I say that I believe?
00:18:59.900 It's really interesting that we're talking about this because what I've seen in our Facebook
00:19:04.540 groups and our organizations and the things that we have going on is so many people will
00:19:07.880 defend things that I think generally most people know is not necessarily in their best
00:19:14.660 interest.
00:19:15.240 One of the things I think about, for example, is pornography.
00:19:18.160 And it's amazing to me because I believe it's a distorted view and perception of healthy
00:19:24.180 sexual practices with a partner.
00:19:26.900 And it's amazing to me how many men will defend that and say it's okay when we pretty well
00:19:33.020 know that there is some negative ramifications of pornography itself.
00:19:38.500 I really question why we fight so hard against some of these, what I would consider universal
00:19:44.560 truths.
00:19:45.040 Yeah, and again, it comes back down to, this is why it's so important as a man to define
00:19:51.960 where do you get your sense of morality.
00:19:54.660 And a lot of us are so busy that we don't ever take the time to consider where do we actually
00:20:01.360 stand on our faith?
00:20:03.440 You know, because a lot of people that are listening and go, yeah, I was raised in the
00:20:06.400 church or I was raised Catholic or, you know, yeah, if God does exist, then it's probably
00:20:12.120 Jesus, you know, like you guys kind of have these, I'm agnostic.
00:20:15.800 I believe God exists, but I don't know who or which person it claims to be, you know.
00:20:21.140 And so that kind of absence on such a critical component of our lives is not good.
00:20:30.840 As men, we need to spend time answering.
00:20:34.460 You can't lead anybody in an area that you have not already made a decision.
00:20:39.820 That's true.
00:20:40.560 Yeah, I believe that.
00:20:41.240 Yeah, so yeah, you need to ask yourself, if I die today, what happens?
00:20:45.960 If I die today, what happens?
00:20:47.440 It's a serious question that we need to take the time to consider as men.
00:20:52.100 Don't get too busy for those kind of questions.
00:20:54.560 You know, when your little boy comes and asks you those kind of questions, you need to have
00:20:57.700 an answer for him and not like some off-the-cuff kind of perspective.
00:21:03.200 Because I said so, right?
00:21:04.740 Yeah, because I said so, or this is what I thought, go figure it out for yourself.
00:21:08.300 If the claims of all religions are true, in terms of if the claims of the Bible are true,
00:21:15.960 then we're talking about eternity with your kids here, you know.
00:21:18.680 And so it's important that you just spend time evaluating why you believe what you believe
00:21:24.300 or what you actually believe.
00:21:25.580 If you don't believe in Jesus, then determine that you don't believe in Jesus.
00:21:29.140 And why that's the case, right?
00:21:30.940 Because then at least you have conviction about that.
00:21:33.480 Yeah.
00:21:34.440 And how do you define what is right and wrong?
00:21:36.880 Again, is it based off of your emotions?
00:21:39.100 Is it based off of science?
00:21:40.980 Is it based off of your experiences?
00:21:43.700 Like, where are you getting the unmovable truths in your life?
00:21:48.200 And based off of that, you get to determine what is right and wrong,
00:21:52.220 which is what is successful and not successful.
00:21:55.080 What have you determined that for yourself?
00:21:56.980 You know, you talked about success being hijacked and saved from success.
00:22:01.380 What do you generally see as the world's definition of success?
00:22:05.820 And then how does that differ with your definition of success specifically?
00:22:10.240 Well, the cool thing is, is that, you know, the world's definition of success,
00:22:13.320 if you just like type in success on a thesaurus, right?
00:22:17.700 You're going to get victory, financial triumph.
00:22:21.880 Abundance, prosperity.
00:22:23.020 Abundance, prosperity, celebrity, you know, good life.
00:22:27.800 That's kind of what you're going to get for that in terms of fame, fortune.
00:22:32.020 And as shallow as that sounds, don't kid yourself.
00:22:35.000 That is what it's about.
00:22:37.220 You know, oh, I'm not I'm not that shallow fame and fortune.
00:22:39.480 No, no, brother.
00:22:40.620 You are that shallow in terms of you are trying to get your influence on social media
00:22:46.160 and you are trying to get wealthy.
00:22:47.840 Right.
00:22:47.940 I mean, we all we all are there.
00:22:50.000 Yeah.
00:22:50.140 And again, what I've found is in most areas, it's completely backwards, right?
00:22:55.760 You know, the wisdom of this world is foolishness to God is what the Bible says.
00:22:59.120 And that that just got me.
00:23:00.960 It hit me hard when it said that the wisdom of this world is foolishness to God.
00:23:04.660 And I just go, OK, what you're saying is that what's popular might not be superior.
00:23:09.040 And when the whole world is metaphorically running left, then maybe you need to run right,
00:23:17.040 meaning that I'll give you an example.
00:23:19.460 You know, the world says if you make lots of money and you got lots of money in the bank
00:23:24.400 account, you're standing on thick ice and you're safe.
00:23:27.800 Well, the Bible says if you make lots of money and you got lots of money in the bank, you're
00:23:32.760 standing on thin ice.
00:23:34.040 Be careful.
00:23:34.880 Hmm.
00:23:35.340 Right.
00:23:35.580 And so it's just backwards and counterintuitive, right, where, you know, children, children
00:23:40.460 are viewed today as kind of like a nuisance, as kind of a, you know, one, none or some in
00:23:46.740 terms of the way that we have children.
00:23:48.940 Even the words use protection, like we're protecting ourselves.
00:23:53.400 Protect yourself.
00:23:53.800 Interesting.
00:23:54.200 I never thought about that.
00:23:55.000 Yeah.
00:23:55.100 We're protecting ourselves from a baby.
00:23:56.960 The Bible says that children are a blessing.
00:23:59.700 It actually says that 134 times that children are a blessing in a variety of different ways.
00:24:03.620 So, yeah, go protect yourself from a blessing.
00:24:05.860 It says wisdom is a blessing.
00:24:07.580 Do you want to protect yourself from that?
00:24:09.200 It says wealth is a blessing.
00:24:10.520 You want to protect yourself from that?
00:24:12.580 You know, do you want to go put a body condom on to protect yourself from fame?
00:24:16.260 Right.
00:24:16.420 You know?
00:24:16.800 No, no, you never do that.
00:24:18.780 Right.
00:24:19.180 And so I open up the front of the book and it's an Old Testament scripture that I just
00:24:23.460 love.
00:24:23.880 And it says, for my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are my ways your ways, says the Lord.
00:24:30.980 For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my
00:24:36.780 thoughts than your thoughts.
00:24:38.120 And so this scripture to me forced me to yield and at least be skeptical of the world's definition
00:24:46.140 of success and go, okay, like what if God's thoughts are my, like, like, like I read something in the
00:24:52.260 Bible and I go, that doesn't make sense.
00:24:54.480 It's culturally unpopular.
00:24:56.460 It's uncomfortable to my flesh, but you're saying that this is right.
00:25:01.240 And I have to go back to the scripture.
00:25:02.940 Okay.
00:25:03.180 Your thoughts are higher than my thoughts.
00:25:04.520 Like I have to, there's a faith required in terms of believing that, that this is actually
00:25:08.580 the right thing, even if it's unpopular to the world.
00:25:11.660 So yeah, like believing that kids are a blessing, you know, and not being determined to not have
00:25:17.220 any, you know, or that marriage is a good thing or that having no debt.
00:25:22.920 I mean, we paid off our house.
00:25:24.120 We have zero debt.
00:25:25.380 Right.
00:25:25.500 And how liberating is that?
00:25:27.260 Incredible, right?
00:25:28.520 Incredibly liberating.
00:25:29.380 But I could have spent that money on a ton of different things that in my opinion, I could
00:25:34.040 have actually made more money with that money.
00:25:35.960 But again, I, I decided to pay off our house and again, it's backwards to the freedom.
00:25:42.340 You know, we worship independence, self-actualization and freedom.
00:25:48.140 I mean, we work as hard as we possibly can to be as free as we possibly can.
00:25:52.500 That is what we do.
00:25:54.180 Like entrepreneurship is all about so that you don't have to answer to anybody and you
00:25:57.620 can do whatever you want.
00:25:58.420 You can travel when you want.
00:25:59.340 You can buy what you want.
00:26:00.720 It's ultimate freedom.
00:26:02.460 What I've realized is the people with the most freedom end up having the hardest lives.
00:26:06.840 Like they end up having no accountability.
00:26:10.400 They end up having no checks and balances, no boundaries.
00:26:13.900 And so for me, having community in the way that, again, you see in the Bible, I have men in
00:26:21.720 my life who have been given permission, who have authority, not just counsel, but authority
00:26:28.700 to speak and for me to listen and submission on how I should live in certain ways.
00:26:35.560 And I don't get to walk just a private life where nobody gets to see in and, and no, I
00:26:43.720 have an insurance policy with men in my life who care about what I do.
00:26:47.880 And if they see me working more than I should be working, they're going to tell me if they
00:26:52.300 see me being angry with my wife, they're going to tell me if they see me making bad decisions
00:26:58.000 with our money, they're going to tell me if they see my wife and my wife tells their
00:27:03.380 wife that I've been irresponsible in some capacity in the home, they're going to go tell
00:27:09.660 their husbands and then they're going to talk to me.
00:27:11.380 And I love it because I have men who look after me and I don't want ultimate freedom
00:27:17.420 because I'm dangerous.
00:27:19.000 Just like all of you men that are listening with ultimate freedom, I want boundaries and
00:27:23.220 I want rules and I want morals and a moral code to follow.
00:27:27.780 And I want men to hold me accountable to that.
00:27:29.420 And that is, again, a part of this book about going, are we really fighting for freedom or
00:27:34.640 do we want certain freedoms are important, but at the end of the day, accountability is
00:27:40.500 incredibly important for men.
00:27:43.620 If you have not heard of the Iron Council by now, you might just be missing out on the
00:27:48.040 one, the one critical component of becoming more successful in every area of your life.
00:27:52.820 That is a band of brothers.
00:27:54.760 I think it would be very hard to find a man who didn't believe that having a core group
00:27:59.380 of motivated and ambitious men around him would help him level up in his life.
00:28:04.580 But that said, I think it would be very easy, very easy to find a man who hasn't done that,
00:28:10.180 who hasn't surrounded himself with a band of brothers.
00:28:12.820 The fact of the matter is it's hard.
00:28:15.120 It takes time and it takes a lot of energy to find other men who have the same desire to
00:28:19.120 grow as you do.
00:28:20.400 And that gentleman is where the Iron Council comes in.
00:28:23.480 This is a brotherhood.
00:28:24.340 It's a group of men, and we're all committed to doing more than talk about what it is we
00:28:29.640 want.
00:28:30.000 We're actively working towards it in four main areas of our lives.
00:28:34.200 It's calibration, connection, condition, and contribution.
00:28:38.560 So when you band with us, we're going to give you access to the tools, the resources, and
00:28:43.000 the framework to help you make more money, connect deeply with the people that you care about,
00:28:48.340 learn who you are and how you best show up and every other goal and every other ambition
00:28:53.200 that you may have.
00:28:54.580 So to join us, head to orderofman.com slash ironcouncil.
00:28:58.580 You can learn a little bit more about what we're up to and of course, reserve and claim
00:29:02.700 your seat at the table.
00:29:03.980 Again, it's orderofman.com slash ironcouncil.
00:29:07.420 Guys, with that said, let's get back to my conversation with Dale.
00:29:10.480 This is an eternal principle as well.
00:29:14.140 One of the things that you mentioned in the book is you have found that a lot of people
00:29:17.720 don't want to subject themselves to a Lord is the term that you used.
00:29:22.860 And they feel like if I surrender to his way, that somehow that makes me less of a man maybe
00:29:30.520 or less in control.
00:29:31.800 But it's really interesting through the Bible, through Aristotle, who 2000 years ago talked
00:29:36.680 about through discipline comes freedom.
00:29:38.340 These are a set of self-imposed limitations and parameters that actually open up opportunities
00:29:44.780 that would be overlooked, I think, and just surpassed altogether as if you strove for ultimate
00:29:51.940 freedom and liberty over every possible decision you could possibly make on a daily basis.
00:29:56.800 Yeah, absolutely.
00:29:57.740 Really, the book is broken down into kind of the main categories of how we think or how we
00:30:05.460 live.
00:30:05.820 So I open up with just this critical introduction.
00:30:08.400 I talk about succeeding at failing.
00:30:10.260 That's the kind of opener about my story.
00:30:12.480 Guys, if you don't know part of my story, I built multi-million dollar companies.
00:30:17.420 I was as intense as it gets.
00:30:20.440 I set a goal when I was 18, told my dad that I was going to be a millionaire by the time I
00:30:24.540 was 30.
00:30:25.480 And just a few months shy of my 30th birthday, I stood there as a broken, miserable millionaire.
00:30:31.900 So there's nothing worse than chasing, you know, there's a, there's a quote that talks
00:30:36.200 about like, there's nothing worse than climbing the ladder and really like realizing that you're
00:30:39.400 on the wrong building.
00:30:40.580 That was very much my experience.
00:30:42.460 But then I talk about marriage.
00:30:44.640 Are you determined to be single?
00:30:47.060 And why is that?
00:30:48.600 Because I can guarantee you that most men, I'm not going to say all men, but most men,
00:30:53.420 if you're determined to be single, it's because of selfishness.
00:30:56.080 I talk about that at a deep level.
00:30:58.660 There's a difference between being single because you, you just haven't found the right
00:31:01.640 woman yet and determined to remain single so that you can continue to fulfill your own
00:31:07.220 desires.
00:31:08.000 I talk about children and this is a hard thing, you're right.
00:31:11.280 Because again, in order for us to properly grow older, we have to raise someone younger.
00:31:16.940 And that's what I've learned as a man is that, I mean, you know, Ryan, you're a father.
00:31:20.880 It's an important part of life and it's not something to be avoided.
00:31:26.560 I talk about money.
00:31:28.040 Most of us have to learn how to have the right principles about money.
00:31:33.200 You know, then I talk about purpose, influence, freedom, and youth.
00:31:37.200 This idea that we've elevated the youth above the elderly.
00:31:42.820 Yeah, that was one of the chapters that really stood out to me where we give our youth more
00:31:47.160 credit than they deserve.
00:31:48.640 I mean, I think about when I was a kid and for anybody to take me seriously would have
00:31:52.900 been laughable and looking back would not have been prudent knowing what I know about
00:31:57.220 myself at that age.
00:31:58.680 Yeah.
00:31:58.800 Right now, culture says that getting older is depressing.
00:32:01.580 The Bible says that getting older is a blessing, right?
00:32:04.480 It's the complete opposite.
00:32:06.440 Like getting older is a good thing.
00:32:07.980 You know, gray hair is, he says, it's a wisdom, is a crown to a man.
00:32:11.500 Well, I know my life gets better.
00:32:12.880 Generally, my life gets better as I get older, as I have more responsibilities, not less,
00:32:17.960 as I learn more, as I develop more and implement more truth into my life.
00:32:22.780 It's, it's always gotten better generally.
00:32:24.760 Yeah, sure.
00:32:25.180 There's higher stakes, right?
00:32:27.160 If I don't do what I need to do financially, for example, well, I could potentially lose
00:32:31.240 the house or not put food on my family's table.
00:32:33.760 But generally speaking, those greater obligations have enhanced my life, not detracted from it.
00:32:38.720 Yeah.
00:32:39.200 And we're trying to constantly hide our age, embrace our age, right?
00:32:43.780 Like if you want to be successful, show the world your age, not your youth.
00:32:47.760 You know, if you want to move quickly, walk slowly.
00:32:50.500 And most of all, if you want to be wise, celebrate the elderly, celebrate age, you know,
00:32:55.640 embrace their pace, care for their position in culture, because one day that position is
00:33:00.640 going to be yours.
00:33:01.320 Yeah, true.
00:33:02.040 And so we just have to just remember that, like seeking counsel from older people, walking
00:33:06.580 in submission to older people.
00:33:08.580 Why do you think it's gone this way?
00:33:09.760 I mean, specifically with youth, how we glamorize it and uplift them and put them on a pedestal
00:33:15.920 where perhaps we should do the exact opposite.
00:33:18.700 Stanford University professor Robert Harrison, he did a pretty incredible study.
00:33:24.440 He ultimately said that we have become the youngest society on earth.
00:33:28.640 And, you know, what does that mean?
00:33:30.160 I mean, the young people have become a model of emulation for the older population rather
00:33:35.720 than the other way around.
00:33:37.400 OK, so that's what we're at right now is that like forever 21, right?
00:33:40.920 You know, like we're we're literally the older population is looking down.
00:33:44.500 It's completely backwards to how it should be or how it always has been.
00:33:50.180 I mean, you can look just if you go to the mall, right?
00:33:52.920 I mean, you could see this kind of stuff.
00:33:54.340 You know, you see moms dress like daughters and fathers, you know, dress like sons.
00:33:57.560 And there's just kind of this egalitarian age kind of thing that's going on.
00:34:01.960 And the language is, you know, not different and it's awkward.
00:34:05.300 And, you know, instead of disciplining their children, people are becoming their friends.
00:34:09.220 And there's just a lot of that kind of behavior that's occurring inside of the culture today.
00:34:13.860 I mean, gyms, fitness centers, we've idolized kind of a body that's to be young, you know,
00:34:19.360 plastic surgery, all these types of things are occurring to hide our age instead of embracing
00:34:25.460 our age.
00:34:27.040 Do you think that has to do with fear of being older or the uncertainty of death itself that
00:34:31.960 we want to postpone that as long as we can?
00:34:34.380 It's absolutely the fear of death because it is whatever they can do to superficially slow
00:34:40.760 down the process of death because they don't know where they're going to go when they die.
00:34:44.900 People who have a confidence in their faith and have a confidence in eternity are excited.
00:34:53.120 I don't want to say excited, are ready to celebrate death.
00:34:56.360 I don't know if you watched all the Billy Graham stuff.
00:34:58.260 Dude, he was all about, he's like, I'm eager to die.
00:35:01.780 Like, not that he's like trying to go anytime soon.
00:35:03.560 Right, right.
00:35:03.980 He's still living a prudent life.
00:35:05.700 Sure.
00:35:05.880 Yeah, I mean, the book of Proverbs says that a wise man thinks of death daily.
00:35:10.280 This is exactly the result of it.
00:35:12.260 People are absolutely afraid of death.
00:35:15.260 They haven't taken the time to evaluate their own personal faith and to build that confidence
00:35:19.100 in eternity.
00:35:20.540 And so instead, what they do is they try to prolong life as much as they possibly can.
00:35:24.680 How do you suggest somebody then begin to identify what they believe about a higher power
00:35:30.780 potentially about their purpose in this world and a potential afterlife?
00:35:34.840 If we just look at just pure numbers, sheer numbers, the Bible is the world's bestseller
00:35:41.320 in terms of just, I would have first evaluate just the Bible and just read the thing.
00:35:46.420 People hate this book they've never even read.
00:35:49.100 Like read it cover to cover.
00:35:50.300 I did it this year.
00:35:51.060 It's 873,000 words.
00:35:52.760 It took me nine months.
00:35:54.000 It's a big commitment.
00:35:55.280 Sure, absolutely.
00:35:56.180 But you know, we're also talking about like eternity here.
00:35:58.940 Like that's kind of a big deal.
00:36:00.360 Like you spend more time building a business than you do thinking about what happens after you
00:36:03.960 die.
00:36:04.260 Well, I do think it is in a lot of ways easier, at least momentarily to bury your head in the
00:36:09.300 sand and pretend that, you know, we'll just postpone this or push this off and maybe it
00:36:13.520 will never come.
00:36:14.340 And quite honestly, that's a little, not a little, it's a lot delusional to approach life
00:36:18.780 that way.
00:36:19.220 But I know I've been guilty of it.
00:36:20.940 Yeah.
00:36:21.100 And it's just an important thing that we need to prioritize.
00:36:24.160 And so I'm going to fight for the Bible, just going, hey, you should take some time to
00:36:28.020 evaluate that.
00:36:28.680 But like, ask yourself, like, why has some of the smartest people on the planet, I'm
00:36:34.160 talking currently, like some of the smartest people on the planet, go watch a video with
00:36:38.000 John Lennox at Oxford University.
00:36:39.740 I mean, this guy is literally one of the smartest people on the planet.
00:36:42.500 And he believes in God from a pragmatic standpoint.
00:36:45.820 And so if you're the intellectual side, you can go that angle, go look at the most intellectual
00:36:50.060 people that believe in God.
00:36:51.160 If you're an emotional side, then you can approach God that way.
00:36:55.100 But at the end of the day, yeah, I don't think that you can define your self-defining success
00:37:00.060 or you're either following someone else's definition of success until you've evaluated and determined
00:37:05.600 what you actually believe.
00:37:07.620 And if, let's just say that you are, you know, supposedly 50% of America says that they're
00:37:12.940 Christian.
00:37:13.600 And so I guess 40, 50% of this audience that's there says that you're Christian.
00:37:17.400 If you are that person and you do believe the Bible, try to figure out the gap.
00:37:22.040 Is there a gap between how you're living and what you say you believe?
00:37:25.540 Like I, like that was my problem and try to close that gap.
00:37:28.840 The cool thing about this book, Ryan, is it's 19,000 words.
00:37:32.720 It takes 120 minutes to read it.
00:37:34.600 Right.
00:37:34.740 Yeah.
00:37:34.840 I think I read it in maybe two nights.
00:37:37.160 Yes.
00:37:37.600 Actually, know what?
00:37:38.200 It was one evening.
00:37:39.080 I spent a couple hours, sat down, cranked it out, and it was a quick read.
00:37:43.360 I've written long books.
00:37:44.740 If there's a lot to say, then say it.
00:37:47.280 But at the end of the day, this is a short book.
00:37:49.880 It's super easy.
00:37:50.700 It's actually, when it comes out, it's a hard case, simple book.
00:37:54.880 It's beautiful, foil covered.
00:37:56.040 And if you can't take two hours to evaluate your direction of success or your direction
00:38:02.640 of morality, then yeah, you've got a problem as a leader, as a man, because it's an important
00:38:06.580 conversation that we should all be having as men.
00:38:10.160 Definitely.
00:38:10.380 I want to extract one of the topics that you had talked about in the book, and that is
00:38:14.600 that of purpose.
00:38:15.420 Because I think there's a lot of men out there listening to this podcast, and I have certainly
00:38:19.800 been here in my life.
00:38:20.740 I know you have as well, because we've had conversations about this, where you feel like
00:38:25.800 you don't have a purpose, a direction, a course.
00:38:29.940 And I know for me that that has been some of the most difficult times in my life.
00:38:35.400 I feel like I'm aimless, and I'm just wandering around, treading water, not really getting anywhere.
00:38:40.680 How does one begin to identify and find purpose in their life?
00:38:44.780 Purpose generally stems from belief.
00:38:48.420 For me, I kind of put a simple formula down for how I found my purpose and how I continue
00:38:53.420 to reveal that purpose, because I don't want to fulfill my will in this world.
00:38:58.520 I want to fulfill—we use the word calling.
00:39:01.540 Even secular people use the word calling.
00:39:04.060 This is my calling.
00:39:04.840 I go, well, if it's a calling, who's calling you?
00:39:07.120 Yeah, who called you, right?
00:39:08.080 And is it a higher power?
00:39:10.000 What is it?
00:39:10.860 Is it the universe?
00:39:11.960 You know, people say that, right?
00:39:13.660 For me, again, this is just my story.
00:39:16.760 But mine is, if you do the obsession with reading the Bible plus fanatical prayer life
00:39:21.680 equals rapid spiritual maturation, and your calling is revealed.
00:39:26.380 That is what it did for me, is that—and again, that's just my pilgrimage that I'm sharing
00:39:31.320 here.
00:39:31.900 But when you read the word—because what the Bible is, is it is the record of God's word
00:39:37.280 to man?
00:39:38.100 That's what it is.
00:39:39.180 So if you want to hear from God, go pick up a Bible and read it.
00:39:41.260 That's what God has to say to humanity.
00:39:43.300 It's in that book, the Bible.
00:39:45.440 And so when you read God's word, and you have fanatical prayer life, meaning that, like,
00:39:50.340 for me, guys—and this sounds maybe a little bit weird—but, like, I get on my face and
00:39:55.160 pray.
00:39:55.660 Like, I lay down on my stomach on the floor, and I go, God, tell me what you want in my life.
00:40:03.660 The combination between those two, it does.
00:40:05.660 It brings rapid spiritual maturation, and I can prove it because my life is more fruitful.
00:40:10.160 My marriage is stronger.
00:40:11.440 My kids are in love with me.
00:40:13.380 We have a great relationship.
00:40:15.100 Our life is ordered.
00:40:16.800 It's not chaotic.
00:40:18.200 People trust me.
00:40:19.360 I have a good reputation.
00:40:20.820 You know, there's fruit from this, and you can't argue with fruitfulness in someone's
00:40:24.240 life.
00:40:24.920 That's a hard thing to argue with.
00:40:26.580 You go, man, what you're doing is working.
00:40:28.980 And when you do that, my calling has been revealed.
00:40:32.280 It's been—for me, it's been like a paragraph of text, and I feel like God's just revealing
00:40:36.820 it, like, one sentence at a time.
00:40:38.940 It's really frustrating at times, actually.
00:40:40.640 You're like, can we speed this up a little bit here?
00:40:42.340 Yeah.
00:40:42.940 There's a quote that I always say that God has far more to do in you than through you.
00:40:48.480 What do you mean?
00:40:49.000 What does that mean?
00:40:49.500 It means that I've literally sat on my face and gone, Lord, use me.
00:40:55.300 Like, I watch guys like Billy Graham and Ravi Zacharias and some of these incredible
00:40:59.240 dudes that are out there that are, like, changing the world.
00:41:01.520 And I just go, like, use me.
00:41:04.360 I want to be used this way.
00:41:06.780 And again, God reminded me, Dale, I have more to do in you.
00:41:10.300 There's more spiritual maturity and development and character development that has to occur
00:41:15.020 in you before you can be used by me.
00:41:17.760 Interesting.
00:41:18.460 Yeah, that makes sense.
00:41:19.320 It just makes sense, right?
00:41:20.220 Like, you want to go change the world?
00:41:21.280 Cool.
00:41:21.680 Go change yourself first.
00:41:23.000 Yeah, right.
00:41:23.660 It's the same concept.
00:41:25.120 And that is very much my experience is that the moment I'm ready to run, God says, no,
00:41:29.760 why don't you stop?
00:41:30.460 And we got some stuff to fix internally before you get there.
00:41:33.540 Interesting.
00:41:34.320 Well, Dale, I know that this is kind of a shorter read based on what you had said in
00:41:38.100 the book that I read, of course.
00:41:39.440 But there's so much that we could talk about.
00:41:41.900 We can't talk about it all for the sake of time.
00:41:43.560 I want to ask you some questions as we wind down.
00:41:45.840 And then, of course, encourage the guys to go pick up a copy of the book, Save from Success.
00:41:49.540 The first question is, what does it mean to be a man?
00:41:51.900 Gosh, I remember you asking me about this before.
00:41:55.460 I think I'm going to drop a quote that is just, I think it's a part of manhood.
00:42:00.580 And it's about reputation.
00:42:04.060 Reputation is kind of the sum makeup of all things that you are.
00:42:09.960 A quote that I always say is that a bad reputation with the world will cost you your popularity.
00:42:14.680 But a bad reputation with God might cost you your eternity.
00:42:20.240 What I'm learning is that sometimes what is viewed as right in the Bible is viewed as wrong in the culture.
00:42:27.460 And there's lots of moments as the world changes that those are becoming more and more prevalent.
00:42:31.740 And so, remaining strong to my moral compass is becoming a very difficult journey.
00:42:41.900 And the standard of a man is someone who can stick to that moral compass and not stray from that moral code.
00:42:50.300 And define what is right and be able to lead people through morality.
00:42:55.480 And again, it brings us back to that core conversation is that how can you lead people in an area that you haven't defined yourself?
00:43:03.000 Yeah, powerful.
00:43:03.820 Powerful, brother.
00:43:04.860 Well, how do we connect with you, pick up a copy of the book, and learn more about what it is you're doing?
00:43:08.500 Yeah, so I write on family, faith, marriage, parenting, cultural topics.
00:43:16.220 I have about a half million people that are following me on Facebook and Instagram.
00:43:20.300 And I write a blog at relearnchurch.org.
00:43:25.680 And you can pick up a copy of this book anywhere books are sold.
00:43:29.360 Go to savedfromsuccess.com.
00:43:32.040 And there's like a whole bunch of freebies that come with it.
00:43:34.340 There's a video course that goes with it that you'll get for free.
00:43:36.520 But yeah, the way that I talk generally on the internet is about – there's lots of great moral conversations that I have that are even free of some of the scriptural components.
00:43:48.880 So if you're not a believer in Christ and you're not a Bible follower, you can still absolutely get some value out of the things that I'm – I have lots of people that follow my journey because they just want to hear about what I have to say about parenting or what I have to say about marriage.
00:44:03.020 And so I'd love to have you on that journey.
00:44:04.900 I'm trying to build an army of righteousness, good godly men, men who are just willing to be fathers and to be great husbands and to be great friends and to be honest and integrity.
00:44:16.280 And it's pretty cool to have as many people as I do following along on that journey.
00:44:20.820 Right on, man.
00:44:21.200 We'll make sure we link everything up.
00:44:22.580 I will say that your Instagram page is one of the best out there.
00:44:26.380 I really get so much from everything that you post about your family life and your business and the way that you view the world, and it's really, really insightful.
00:44:33.660 So, guys, if you're not following Dale on Instagram, make sure you do everything else, but certainly make sure you do that.
00:44:38.380 Dale, I appreciate you, brother.
00:44:39.240 I always have.
00:44:40.240 I've been following you for years, and we've just been connected over the past couple of years now.
00:44:44.280 But I'm always inspired by you, your thoughts, your ideas.
00:44:47.460 You're a deep thinker, which I definitely appreciate and appreciate you coming on the show today.
00:44:52.320 Dude, Ryan, I appreciate your audience.
00:44:54.080 I appreciate your message.
00:44:56.000 Yeah, respect what you're doing.
00:44:57.760 And again, the same back at you.
00:44:59.580 So just, again, thank you for having me.
00:45:01.440 And everybody that's listening, thank you for taking the time.
00:45:05.500 Gentlemen, there it is, my conversation with Dale Partridge.
00:45:08.340 I know that this was probably an interesting conversation for you, may have been even polarizing for a lot of us.
00:45:15.680 I'm not suggesting that you have to obviously take this stuff to heart, but I would have you consider it because I think there's truth everywhere.
00:45:22.540 And I think the more that we can have difficult or uncomfortable conversations, the more well-rounded that we'll become.
00:45:29.880 And it will do one of two things.
00:45:31.060 It's either going to solidify what we already believe or, and this is the second option, is it's going to open us up to new opportunities and new experiences and a new way of looking at things.
00:45:42.420 And I consider both of those wins.
00:45:44.880 So I hope you enjoyed this show.
00:45:47.160 I hope that you took a lot away from it.
00:45:49.260 And I would encourage you to reach out to me, reach out to Dale on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, wherever you are on social media.
00:45:57.480 Let us know what you thought about the show.
00:45:58.780 The good, the bad, the indifferent, what did you enjoy?
00:46:01.280 What are you going to be implementing in your life?
00:46:02.880 What are you going to be changing or doing different?
00:46:05.040 Having listened to our conversation and then, of course, reading his book, Saved From Success.
00:46:09.900 Now, in the meantime, while you're doing that, I would also encourage you to go ahead and take a look at our exclusive brotherhood, The Iron Council.
00:46:16.380 You heard me talk about it about 20 minutes or so ago.
00:46:19.340 And this is just a reminder.
00:46:20.880 This is our brotherhood.
00:46:21.760 It's three hundred and roughly seventy five men right now, all working together towards some common goals and also some individual, some unique goals that we have in our own lives.
00:46:32.760 We're giving the framework and the tools and the discussion and everything else that goes into becoming a better man, better man for yourself, your family, your business, your community, however you choose to look at it in all of those areas.
00:46:44.480 So you can check that out at order of man dot com slash iron council.
00:46:48.380 Now, I put this little announcement here at the end because I just wanted to plant a bug in your ear for those of you who stuck around to the end in September.
00:46:57.060 We've got a new event coming out.
00:46:59.280 This is actually going to be a father son event.
00:47:01.860 It's called Order of Man Legacy, and it's designed for fathers with sons between the ages of eight to 15.
00:47:08.680 Again, it's Order of Man Legacy.
00:47:11.500 It's for fathers and sons, sons between the ages of eight to 15, and it's going to be in September.
00:47:16.700 I want to get that on your radar.
00:47:18.020 I'm going to give you the details in the coming weeks so you can sign up and register.
00:47:21.140 But I'm telling you, this is going to be an amazing, amazing event.
00:47:24.180 It's a rite of passage in a way for your son and for you in a way to forge a bond that hopefully and the goal here is to last a lifetime.
00:47:31.200 So, again, that's Order of Man Legacy.
00:47:32.980 I'll get you the details in the coming weeks.
00:47:35.120 So, guys, that's it.
00:47:36.240 That's all I have for you.
00:47:37.060 I'm going to sign out and call it a day.
00:47:38.460 I appreciate you, as always, being on this expedition, being on this journey, if you will, of reclaiming in a society that doesn't quite understand what it means to be a man, teaching all of us, myself included, and learning how to step up more fully in our businesses, our families, our communities, and our lives.
00:47:56.440 Again, we could not do this without you.
00:47:58.660 So, gentlemen, until Friday, take action and become the man you are meant to be.
00:48:04.080 Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast.
00:48:06.540 If you're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be, we invite you to join the Order at orderofman.com.
00:48:14.280 Thank you.
00:48:15.280 Thank you.