Order of Man - 5 Lessons Learned Building Our Canoe

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart

00:00:05.000 your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.

00:00:10.480 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong. This is your life. This is who

00:00:17.240 you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,

00:00:22.800 you can call yourself a man. Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Michler,

00:00:27.480 and I am the host and the founder of the Order a Man movement and podcast. I've got something near

00:00:33.940 and dear to my heart that I wanted to talk with you about today, and that is building my canoe. I

00:00:38.020 know some of you guys are probably already rolling your eyes. You don't want to hear about my canoe

00:00:43.280 anymore, but what I'm going to do is I'm going to make this practical advice, information, tips for

00:00:49.160 you to implement in your own life. So whether or not you want to build a canoe of your own,

00:00:53.960 you can implement some of the lessons that I've learned over the past six months as my son and I

00:00:58.500 have been building this thing. Before I get into that, just want to make a quick mention of our

00:01:03.300 legacy event. Last week, I told you the wrong dates. I told you to go look on the website,

00:01:07.680 and I'm glad I did because I gave you the completely wrong dates. It is September 23rd through the 26th

00:01:14.840 of this year, 2021. This is our father-son event. So if you've got a boy or a son or a nephew or a

00:01:25.060 little brother between the ages of eight to 15, and you want to get them to a place where other men

00:01:29.800 are going to learn how to be men, to forge deeper and tighter bonds between themselves and their boys,

00:01:35.680 and to be challenged physically, mentally, emotionally, all designed to help you usher

00:01:40.860 your young man into manhood, then I would encourage you to, at a minimum, go check out the video from

00:01:47.460 past events because you're going to be blown away with what we're doing. And we've got four

00:01:51.120 additional spots left. That's it. Four spots, September 23rd through the 26th, 2021, orderaman.com

00:01:59.660 slash legacy, orderaman.com slash legacy. And while you're out here, because it's on my property in

00:02:04.480 Maine, you'll get to see the canoe that my son and I are building. And the one that I'm referencing

00:02:08.860 today in this podcast, which is what, again, I wanted to talk with you about. So we had this idea.

00:02:14.700 A lot of people have asked me, you know, why build a canoe? We had this idea. I should say I had this

00:02:19.200 idea. Uh, last year I bought one of those, uh, lifetime or lifestyle, big plastic kayak slash canoe

00:02:27.360 things. And we took it out to the lake quite a bit last year and really enjoyed it. Uh, and as I was

00:02:33.520 kayaking across the lake one day, I thought, you know, wouldn't this be better if it wasn't a canoe

00:02:39.780 that my son and I made. So I spent, uh, months trying to figure out, you know, is this really

00:02:46.420 something I want to do and doing a little research on where to get it, which I'll give you some insight

00:02:50.680 here in a minute. Uh, and telling my wife that I was going to do this and her rolling her eyes

00:02:56.020 because she knows how I get with projects and just trying to figure out if this is something I

00:03:00.440 wanted to do in the midst of everything else that I have going on. And I finally decided to

00:03:04.260 pull the trigger. I said, okay, I'm, I'm doing this. I've never built one before. I've wanted

00:03:08.800 to for a while. This would be cool in the lake this spring in the summer. My son and I can do this

00:03:13.500 together. It'll be a great project. We're doing it. So did a lot of research and we ended up landing

00:03:18.680 on a company called a bear, bear mountain boats. And that's where we got the plans from. And that's

00:03:25.140 where we got the wood from guys have asked me if it's a kit. That's probably not

00:03:30.340 the right term. Cause I think when you say kit, some people might assume that it comes

00:03:35.180 in all the right sizes and exactly everything you need with all the tools and everything

00:03:38.480 else. And it wasn't like that. Uh, we got a lot of what we needed, including the wood

00:03:43.860 and the epoxy and the molds and some of these other things, but we had to build the strong

00:03:47.160 back, which is the bench, the canoe sits on. Uh, we had to do a lot of research on our

00:03:51.440 own. Of course, we have to cut everything to size and we have to bend the stems and put it

00:03:55.700 all together. And it's a lot of work besides just what I think a kit would be that might

00:04:02.220 be setting you up for failure. But regardless, that's where we got the plans. That's where

00:04:05.980 we got the materials. And it's been a pretty good experience, uh, for the most part. And,

00:04:10.920 uh, yeah, thought I'd give you that information. So if you're looking for a canoe to build on

00:04:14.820 your own outside of what I'm going to talk with you about today, then bear mountain boats

00:04:17.980 is a great resource. I have no affiliation with them whatsoever. Other than that's where I

00:04:22.880 got our canoe and our plans and our materials and it's been good. All right. So outside of

00:04:28.420 just building a canoe, I wanted to share these lessons with you because they apply not just

00:04:32.880 towards building a boat, but to every facet of life. And we found that, uh, my son and

00:04:38.160 I have found that we want to continue to build boats. In fact, we already bought a second canoe.

00:04:43.100 Uh, this was a canoe built in the mid nineties with a father and his son. It's a big canoe. It

00:04:48.140 holds up to 2000 pounds. It's a 20 footer EM white model. Uh, we're going to take

00:04:52.820 that either on the Allagash or some of the lakes here in, uh, in Maine this year with

00:04:57.260 my family and do some extended camp outs with that thing. So we've got to do a little

00:05:00.640 refurbishing on that before that's, uh, water ready, but, uh, we've really enjoyed it, but

00:05:05.980 there's so many applicable lessons outside of just building a canoe. And that's really

00:05:10.060 what I wanted to share with you today. So without further ado, let me get into the lessons

00:05:14.840 I shared. And then you could decide if you want to build a canoe for yourself or do

00:05:18.120 something else, but regardless, these lessons should serve you well. All right. Number

00:05:22.700 one, guys, you don't need to know how to do everything to get started. One of the

00:05:27.680 most popular questions I get is whether it's building a canoe or starting a

00:05:32.320 podcast or launching a movement or growing a business or starting in your

00:05:35.900 physical fitness journey is guys will say, where do I get started? I don't know

00:05:39.660 how to do it. How do I get started? You start with the first step and guys, that

00:05:43.660 isn't a cop-out. So when it comes to building a canoe, what was the first step? I

00:05:47.360 had to do some research, right? I had to figure out, okay, well, this company's got

00:05:50.940 this and that company's got this and they've got these reviews and they've got

00:05:53.820 this review. What books are they using? What materials do I need? How do we buy

00:05:58.200 this? How much is it going to cost? So we did the research and we landed on, like

00:06:02.840 I said, bear mountain boats. And I called the gal up and I said, here's what we're

00:06:07.020 looking to do. What would you suggest? So look to the people who have already done

00:06:11.640 this because they're going to give you insight and input. And she gave us some

00:06:14.500 recommendations and we actually ended up pulling the trigger. But the point is here, I

00:06:19.700 didn't know how to build a canoe. We're about 80%, I would say, done at this

00:06:23.920 point. We're going to be glassing the inside hole this week. In fact, actually

00:06:28.080 after I'm done recording this podcast, I'm going to be starting on that. And then

00:06:32.700 we're going to put the gunnels on and the seats and the thwarts and the deck and

00:06:35.300 all that. And we should be wrapped up pretty close to at that point. But this

00:06:40.340 has been a long process. Like I said, we started January 1st. I built the strong

00:06:43.700 back, which is the bench the entire canoe is made on. And I didn't know how to do it

00:06:48.600 all. All right. I didn't get overwhelmed with all of the details and all the

00:06:52.240 things that needed to be done and what it's going to look like and how it's

00:06:54.800 going to work and what 0.7 was before I even got to 0.1. All I did was look at

00:06:59.460 the book and I said, okay, here I am on step one, step A, B, C, D, E, F. And as I

00:07:06.120 was about halfway through the steps in building the boat itself, I started to

00:07:10.560 look at what step number two was, part number two, so that I could get the right

00:07:15.580 materials and tools and wrap my head around what needed to be done and do the

00:07:19.360 research. But the point is, is that we're learning as we're building. I mean, so many

00:07:24.740 of you are looking for everything to be exactly right and everything to be lined

00:07:28.360 out and to know all the information about everything. Look, you don't need to know

00:07:34.700 it all. Okay. You just need to know what the next step is and you need to know in

00:07:39.780 what direction you're heading and then you can build from there. And that's

00:07:44.120 that's exactly what we've done and it's worked out fairly well. We'll find out for

00:07:48.640 sure if it worked out when we put it on the water, but I feel confident that the

00:07:51.500 thing will float even though people like to ask if I'm building a canoe that will

00:07:54.560 float. Yes. What is the point of building a boat if it doesn't float? Okay. You

00:07:59.920 don't need to know it all. Get started. Please get started. Oh, Ryan, I don't know

00:08:04.900 where to start. You know where to start. Just start. Take the first step, then the

00:08:10.540 next step, then the next step and so on. And before you know it, you look back and

00:08:13.540 think, man, I had no idea how to do this, but I'm more equipped now. I have more

00:08:17.700 information. I'm better off, et cetera, et cetera. All right. Number two, slow and

00:08:23.560 methodical. Guys, it's very easy for us as men to want all the results, everything

00:08:30.220 done and said right now, taken care of, grown, built, everything. Like we want all

00:08:35.940 the results without the work. We want them yesterday. At least I do. If you're

00:08:39.040 anything like me, you do too. And I've realized that sometimes when we get excited

00:08:45.880 about these things, we burn the fuel of motivation very hot, but it burns out very

00:08:50.320 quickly, right? So we come out of the gates full steam ahead and we do everything

00:08:55.260 that we possibly can. And then we wind up burning ourselves out before we've

00:09:00.580 completed the task at hand. And I did this with the canoe. I burned up and I

00:09:04.680 burned out. We put so much work, so much effort. A couple of the people that I've

00:09:08.840 been able to connect with since have said, man, I can't believe how fast you're

00:09:12.080 going on this thing. And I have taken probably the last month, a month and a

00:09:17.540 half off because I was just, I was sick of it. Frankly, I was like, oh, I don't want to do

00:09:22.460 this anymore. We're about 50 or 60% done. I'm like, I don't want to do anymore.

00:09:26.080 That's because I burned myself out because I tried to come out of the gates

00:09:29.540 too hot and do everything without realizing that this was going to be a

00:09:35.320 slow, drawn out, methodical process. Now we've started again over the past couple

00:09:41.380 of weeks and we've made some good progress, but I'm learning the lesson not to

00:09:45.240 burn myself out and instead do something on the canoe every single day. So guys, you

00:09:51.100 don't need to lose 40 pounds this month. In the next year, sure. But if you could

00:09:55.100 lose two or three or five this month, then do that because you always have next

00:10:00.180 month and the next month and the next month and so on. What I don't want you to

00:10:04.580 do is I don't want you to get all hopped up and hot and bothered about a new

00:10:07.700 project or a new business or a new relationship and you pour everything that

00:10:12.720 you have into that endeavor, into that relationship, and then you just don't have

00:10:18.320 any more fuel because you've burned too hot. And then you give up, you fall

00:10:22.120 short, you throw in the towel. And then of course, how are you going to feel when

00:10:25.660 you quit? And that's essentially what you're doing. Sorry if you hear the

00:10:29.540 semi-trucks in the background. I had to open the window because it's getting hot

00:10:32.380 here in Maine. So you're going to hear some trucks over the summer. But I don't

00:10:36.540 want you to burn out. I want you to be slow. I want you to be methodical. I want you

00:10:41.020 to do something every single day. Maybe it's 10 minutes. Maybe it's 15 minutes. Maybe

00:10:44.760 it's an hour, but don't burn yourself out. Be in the game forever. So now that

00:10:48.820 we're back into it, we've been working on it every day and it's not so

00:10:53.660 overwhelming as it can be because I'm not seeing the entire picture. I'm just

00:10:57.980 seeing the next step and I'm just working on that one thing, hanging it up

00:11:01.460 for the day, going to do my other things and responsibilities and obligations, and

00:11:04.760 then I'll come back to it tomorrow. And I've got the time to do it and I want to be

00:11:09.100 consistent on it as well. So slow and steady and methodical. Remember that. Don't burn

00:11:14.140 them up. All right. Number three, sometimes guys, the things that we enjoy

00:11:18.500 doing still suck. And what I've seen is so many men who want everything to be

00:11:23.780 just right and just perfect and feel good about everything they're doing and

00:11:27.140 everything to be seamless and no problems and never want to feel bad about what

00:11:31.680 they're doing. And I've realized that during building this canoe, I'm on a step

00:11:35.000 right now where I'm sanding the inside of the hull. And anybody who's built a boat

00:11:39.180 knows exactly what I'm talking about right here. It's painstaking. It's

00:11:43.940 miserable. It's exhausting. I've got sawdust in my nose and my mouth and my

00:11:49.780 eyes, even though I've got protective gear and all that. Uh, and my arms are tired

00:11:54.680 and my back sore. It sucks. It sucks. It's not a fun part of the process, but we

00:12:02.820 need to understand that even the best things, even the grandest plans and the

00:12:06.620 greatest ideas and the most noble pursuits and exercises and things that

00:12:11.360 we're going to do, adventures are not always going to be easy. If they're, if

00:12:16.020 they're always easy, they're probably not going to be worth anything anyways. And

00:12:19.800 what I don't want to have happen is for you to run into some sort of snag or

00:12:25.000 roadblock on your path to fitness and plateau and think, well, see, it's not

00:12:29.880 meant to be, or your business doesn't grow as fast as you would like. And so, you

00:12:33.860 know, you throw in the towel before you really had an opportunity to grow, or

00:12:38.060 you get into an argument with your girlfriend or your wife and you think

00:12:41.220 the relationship is over. No guys, sometimes life just sucks. Let's deal

00:12:46.240 with that deliberately, intentionally. Let's be honest with our, our, the

00:12:50.360 people that are impacted by the decisions we're making in our lives and

00:12:53.180 also honest with ourselves. And the more that we're honest with ourselves

00:12:56.820 about things, sometimes just sucking, the more likely it is that we're going to

00:13:00.440 just bear down and brace for impact and drive on through and get past the

00:13:05.460 step, you know, that sucks. And we're at that stage now. I just yesterday

00:13:09.740 finished sanding the inside of the hole and cleaning it up and getting it just

00:13:12.960 where I wanted. And now I'm on to a next step. I had to grind quite literally

00:13:17.380 and figuratively, and I had to work through and mentally I had to just keep

00:13:21.240 going. And now we're in a better place because we got through it. And I'm proud

00:13:24.940 that I got through it as well. You know, if you're quitting and throwing in the

00:13:28.640 towel, every time things get a little hard, what's that going to do to your

00:13:31.400 confidence, let alone your ability to complete a project or a task. You want to

00:13:35.120 be confident, do it when it sucks. When you don't want to do it, get up, go to

00:13:39.260 the gym, work out, have that difficult conversation, ask for that promotion, do

00:13:43.400 that email or have that conversation you've been dreading. Get through the

00:13:48.400 thing. It's going to suck, but it's going to be better on the other side of

00:13:51.440 that. Number four, and this relates to it sucking is that you're, you're going to

00:13:58.240 mess up at times and you got to afford yourself some grace. You know, there's a

00:14:04.260 big push in society, especially within the self-development and self-help space

00:14:07.680 like I feel like I'm in, uh, that says it's not okay to mess up and you should

00:14:11.800 feel bad about it. And you know, of course you're going to feel bad for

00:14:14.780 messing up. And I think you should, if you didn't feel bad, you'd be

00:14:17.880 indifferent. And that seems strange if it's something meaningful to you. So

00:14:21.020 feeling bad just comes with the territory, but understand that you're going to

00:14:24.820 mess up from time to time and you're going to screw up and things aren't

00:14:28.580 always going to go according to plan. And then you have to know that when you do

00:14:32.500 mess up, that you can fix it and you can adapt and you can learn new strategies

00:14:36.640 and new techniques and overcome. I put little nicks and gouges. When I pulled the

00:14:41.260 canoe off the molds itself, I ripped five or six strips off of the stem. I was

00:14:46.260 heartbroken. My heart sank when I did it. Uh, and I was distraught and I went

00:14:52.840 upstairs and I was so disappointed and I gave myself a little bit and cooled off,

00:14:57.300 you know, just got a, got a drink and talk to the family or played with the

00:15:00.060 family. And I went back down there with a calm, level-headed approach and looked

00:15:03.340 at the problem and we fixed it. You can barely even notice it now. And a little

00:15:07.340 bit that you can notice is just character on the road to building something I've

00:15:10.580 never built before. So you're going to screw up, embrace it, accept it. It's

00:15:17.380 reality. If you think you're going to be perfect, well, I got news for you.

00:15:21.920 And if you think you're going to be perfect, you're going to throw in the

00:15:25.220 towel. You're going to quit. You're going to feel like a loser when they

00:15:27.520 don't go perfect, when your plans don't go exactly right and they won't. So

00:15:31.120 deal with it and then learn to be resilient. Think on your feet, be

00:15:34.920 creative, be resourceful, give yourself a little margin when you mess up so you

00:15:38.640 can come back with a fresh perspective and a level head so you don't make it

00:15:41.400 worse, which I've done, but just know things are going to get messed up. Things

00:15:45.660 are going to get screwed up. It's okay. You can fix it. It's one little blip on the,

00:15:51.460 the time span of your life. So treat it like a blip, fix it, move along

00:15:56.600 quickly. It's all going to be okay. And the last thing guys, and I think this

00:16:00.840 ties into sometimes things are going to suck as well. Point number five is let

00:16:05.080 the future fuel you. Let the future fuel you on your path to fitness, on your

00:16:11.420 path to a great relationship, on your path to improvement or starting that

00:16:14.840 business or doing any number of things that you want to do and complete. As I

00:16:19.600 said, it's going to get painful and it's going to get lonely and it's going to suck

00:16:23.020 at times. And that's part of the deal. But when you want to get past that, you

00:16:27.080 need to look into the future for what the future holds. As I was sitting sanding this

00:16:31.700 yesterday, thinking about how miserable I was and how my arms and shoulders were

00:16:35.280 tired and my back was sore. I just kept thinking to myself and envisioning that

00:16:38.920 day where we took the canoe off the trailer or off the rack of the truck and we

00:16:43.040 dropped it in the water. And my oldest son and I got in the canoe for the

00:16:46.080 first time and we floated and canoed across the lake. And that picture, that

00:16:50.420 vivid picture of the smiles and the joy and the happiness and the satisfaction

00:16:55.840 and fulfillment of creating and building something that we could actually use

00:16:59.560 kept me going when I didn't want to do it. And this is not a big deal, right?

00:17:03.820 Like building a canoe, I could throw in the towel, I could quit any time, but it

00:17:07.360 kept me sanding when I didn't want to sand. Years ago, I did a Spartan gogi, which is a

00:17:12.840 60 hour endurance event. And there was times, multiple times where I wanted to

00:17:17.660 quit and throw in the towel and ring the bell they had. And I just kept thinking

00:17:22.100 about the phone call that I was going to have with my kids and tell them, Hey, you

00:17:26.240 know what? Dad did it. Dad did it. And as I was struggling on the mountain with 10 or

00:17:33.040 so of my teammates and we were struggling and it was challenging and tough. I just

00:17:38.680 kept thinking to myself, that phone call is going to be amazing. And guess what?

00:17:43.260 That phone call was amazing. It was everything that I envisioned it. And it may

00:17:48.820 not seem like a big deal to you, but you know what? It doesn't need to be a big

00:17:51.800 deal to you. The things that fuel me, my future needs to be a big deal to me. The

00:17:57.940 things that fuel you need to be a big deal to you. So if I don't resonate with

00:18:02.440 it, that's okay. If your family or your friends don't resonate with it, that's okay.

00:18:06.560 Whatever you can create in your mind, a vision or an idea or a concept or a place

00:18:11.920 of the future, whatever it can be to fuel you to keep going, that's what you need.

00:18:18.560 And if you don't have that, you're going to stop. It's going to be painful.

00:18:23.960 The path to becoming a more capable, more proficient, better man is painful and

00:18:29.480 lonely and filled with ups and downs and highs and lows and struggles and

00:18:34.520 failures and setbacks and achievements and victories and everything in

00:18:37.600 between. And when you're struggling and you don't want to go any further, just

00:18:42.620 think about your family. Think about what your kids mean to you. Think about

00:18:46.160 what your wife means to you. Think about what it's going to be like when you

00:18:49.620 grow that business and you're able to influence thousands. Think about what

00:18:53.640 it's going to be like when you can buy a plane ticket for your family on a

00:18:57.260 vacation that you've always wanted to do, but never could afford. Think about how

00:19:00.980 you're going to feel when you look in the mirror and you can actually start to

00:19:03.500 see the abs in that mirror and your six pack. Or think about you getting into a

00:19:09.480 dangerous or violent encounter and you emerging victorious because you've been

00:19:13.240 training for years and years to make yourself a weapon capable of doing

00:19:17.720 righteous violence if needed. Think about those things. Those are the things that

00:19:22.860 propel us and move us forward and motivate and inspire us. And then we have to

00:19:26.660 have the discipline to back it up. So this isn't about a canoe, guys. We're

00:19:32.100 building a canoe. But to us, it's so much more meaningful than that because we

00:19:36.240 want it to be and we've made the decision for it to be. So I hope these lessons

00:19:40.260 serve you as you're thinking about building your own quote-unquote canoe, which I'm

00:19:45.880 using as a metaphor for a project, a business, a relationship, or just building

00:19:52.720 yourself into a better, more capable man. Number one, you don't need to know how to

00:19:58.680 do everything to get started. You just need the first step. Number two, slow, steady,

00:20:06.080 methodical. Don't burn that fuel too hot. Be in the game as long as you need to be in

00:20:11.980 the game. Number three, sometimes the things that we enjoy, the things that are

00:20:15.840 meaningful, they suck. And that's part of life. Doesn't mean it's not a pursuit you

00:20:20.120 should not be engaged in. It means that it's life and it sucks sometimes. Deal

00:20:24.300 with it. Number four, you're going to mess up. You're going to struggle. You're

00:20:29.300 going to fail. You're going to fall short. Welcome to life. Recognize it. Acknowledge

00:20:37.140 your mess ups quickly. Look at them objectively. Be resourceful. Be resilient. Be

00:20:42.620 creative. And figure out a way to fix the mess ups as they happen. And number five, let

00:20:48.580 the future fuel you. The future can be brighter. It will be brighter. If you work towards it.

00:20:57.120 And if you let it be the right type of fuel for you to keep going when things are challenging

00:21:01.240 and tough and difficult and demanding and scary and everything else that we experience

00:21:06.100 as men. Let a better future, a brighter future fuel you for what you need to do right

00:21:12.620 now to make sure that happens. All right, guys, I will keep you updated. I'll keep posting

00:21:17.180 pictures and sharing what we're doing so you can see the journey and the progress that

00:21:21.020 we've made. I really appreciate the support and feedback from you guys. You guys have

00:21:24.540 given me tips and tricks and ideas and inspiration and congratulations and the fuel I need to keep

00:21:31.660 going as well. And I'm honored to be able to share a small part of what we're doing with

00:21:35.300 you guys. And of course, to be able to build this thing with my son. Can't wait to get it

00:21:39.080 on the water. But I can't wait to see what your, again, quote unquote, canoe is and what

00:21:43.880 you're doing to improve yourself, improve your life and the projects that you're going

00:21:47.120 to be working on. These are the things that are going to keep you engaged and motivated

00:21:50.260 and help you become the man that you want to be. And also the type of man that your family

00:21:54.980 and your friends and your loved ones need you to be. And also society needs you to be.

00:21:59.760 We are devoid. I should say we are increasingly devoid of manliness and masculinity. And it's up

00:22:05.900 to each and every one of us, the hundreds of thousands, if not millions of men who will hear

00:22:09.080 this podcast at some point, to become, to do, to be more. All right, guys, we'll be back

00:22:16.620 next week. Until then, go out there, take action and become the man you are meant to be.

00:22:21.680 Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your

00:22:25.840 life and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.

Order of Man - June 11, 2021

5 Lessons Learned Building Our Canoe ｜ FRIDAY FIELD NOTES

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