Order of Man - 5 Ways Men Relinquish Their Sovereignty ｜ FRIDAY FIELD NOTES

00:00:00.000 That's not sovereignty. That's actually servitude with slightly better optics.

00:00:08.500 A man who chases validation is always running around like a chicken with its head cut off,

00:00:16.460 never arriving at who he actually is. But that sovereign man I'm talking about

00:00:20.860 says what he means. He owns what he believes. And then he lets other people have their reactions.

00:00:26.360 And that's okay.

00:00:28.960 Man, I want you to think about the most powerful version of yourself.

00:00:33.380 It's not the polished version, not the version you perform for other people.

00:00:39.860 It's the real one, the one who makes decisions from your level of conviction instead of the fear that you might have.

00:00:49.180 It's the man who isn't asking for permission from other people to do what he's wanted to do all along.

00:00:56.360 it's the one who isn't waiting on somebody else to tell him what to do or what to think or how to

00:01:03.960 be or how to show up or how to perform. Now, I want you to ask yourself, honestly, how close

00:01:10.340 are you to that man? Because here's what I have personally observed over years, decade at this

00:01:19.600 point of working with men. Most of us aren't living from that place. Most of us have handed

00:01:26.040 over the controls, probably slowly, probably methodically, probably quietly, usually without

00:01:34.700 even realizing it. And what we've done is we've given away our authority to other people, our

00:01:40.580 autonomy, our ability to define ourselves by our own terms. We have literally relinquished our

00:01:48.860 sovereignty in many cases. And that's exactly what I'm going to get with you today about.

00:01:55.440 Okay. But before we get into how to reclaim some of that sovereignty, I want to define what I mean

00:02:02.800 by the word sovereignty, because this is a word that over the past eight, nine years now has get,

00:02:09.320 has just been bastardized. It's been thrown around. Nobody was using the word sovereignty

00:02:14.580 until 2018, when I wrote a book called Sovereignty, The Battle for the Hearts and Minds of Men.

00:02:21.920 Nobody was using the word. And then I wrote the book and everybody started using the word and

00:02:26.920 started changing what it means and transforming what it means and distorting it and contorting it

00:02:33.440 and bastardizing it into something that would fit their current worldview.

00:02:38.280 you. But I want to be really precise about what sovereignty actually means. Now, look, it's not

00:02:45.880 arrogance. It's not isolation. It's not pretending that you don't need anyone. That's what a lot of

00:02:53.660 the doctrine of popular culture will say. Sovereignty is actually the condition of being

00:03:00.200 the primary author of your own life. Now, I also remember when I wrote this book that

00:03:07.200 I wondered if I was mocking God because we often hear about God's sovereignty.

00:03:11.920 And I do believe that he is sovereignty over everything. But I also know for a fact

00:03:18.620 that he has given us agency to make decisions of our own lives, which means that he has given us

00:03:25.920 sovereignty or agency, however you choose to look at it, over the decisions that we make.

00:03:32.160 Regardless of our relationship with him, we are capable of making our own decisions.

00:03:37.200 Now, with that said, this is an important distinction and caveat.

00:03:41.340 I believe that if we follow his word, we'll live a better life.

00:03:45.660 But that doesn't undermine the fact that we are allowed to choose our own path.

00:03:51.020 What sovereignty means is that it means that you are the one setting the terms for how you spend your time and attention and energy and what you stand for and how you show up and what you accept as truth and lie and deception.

00:04:05.420 and what you refuse. It means that your identity is not outsourced to me or any other social media

00:04:14.860 quote-unquote influencer that you listen to or read their books or go to their events or whatever

00:04:20.760 else. Your decisions are not crowdsourced, so to speak. Your standards are not borrowed from

00:04:29.860 whoever is the loudest and most obnoxious on the social media platforms a sovereign man is not

00:04:37.000 ruled by his carnal appetite or his emotion or his past or other people's opinions of him

00:04:47.120 he is self-governing he is in the truest sense of the word in command of his life

00:04:55.360 now here's why this matters so much for you because sovereignty is not this this fixed state

00:05:02.500 it's not this state that you achieve and then you're done it's something that you either protect

00:05:11.860 with vigilance every single day or you just surrender every single day and i think most

00:05:19.320 men are surrendering it, surrendering it without even a fight. Well, and that's the sad part is

00:05:25.600 most men don't even know they're in a fight, but you are. You're in a fight against Satan. You're

00:05:30.560 in a fight against evil. You're in a fight against the doctrine of popular culture. You're in a fight

00:05:36.040 against capitalism and socialism. You're in a fight against ignorant morons who would love to 1.00

00:05:42.460 see you subjugated because they're useful idiots. You're in a fight against pure evil who would love 1.00

00:05:48.960 to see you shackled and bound by poor decision-making. When I started this movement 10

00:05:57.220 years ago, I was mocked for even suggesting that men are in a battle because the mere thought of

00:06:07.460 it made these men believe that it was weak to believe that we were being attacked or at a

00:06:16.820 minimum being dismissed. And those same guys who were crying about we're not under attack are the

00:06:22.740 same guys who were wondering how this even happened. It's because you pulled the wool over

00:06:27.400 your eyes and you pretended like there wasn't a problem when me and other people saw that there

00:06:32.600 was, and you acted as if everything was business as usual. It's not. Are you guys awake yet?

00:06:39.880 11 years down the road are you awake yet and still i have people i had one of our guys within

00:06:49.460 our organization who's been in our organization for a long time talk about why it's complaining

00:06:56.400 if a man explains how the odds are stacked against us that's not complaining that's being realistic 0.99

00:07:04.000 if you're gonna bury your head in the sand and be a little bitch about it then go ahead and do that 0.96

00:07:09.640 but there's millions of us who acknowledge that there's a problem consciously and subconsciously 0.99

00:07:18.240 in culture actively working against what it means to be a man and i'm not going to bury my

00:07:25.280 head in the sand i'm not going to pretend like addressing the issues makes me a victim it

00:07:31.620 actually makes me somebody who has control over my life because i'm willing to accept reality

00:07:37.280 so here are the five most common ways that i've seen over 11 years now how men relinquish their

00:07:45.100 sovereignty okay so number one is approval seeking their men are outsourcing their self-worth

00:07:53.400 to other people's opinions and this one's dangerous it's insidious it's it's very

00:07:58.580 destructive because it doesn't look like weakness it looks like being a likable friendly guy

00:08:05.500 it looks like keeping the peace it looks like not wanting to rock the boat and being agreeable

00:08:13.820 and people like individuals like that obviously because there's no challenge in that but underneath

00:08:21.560 that behavior is a man who has handed the keys of his identity over to an audience over to the group

00:08:30.160 over to the collective over to the mob and when that happens what you do is you stop making

00:08:35.640 decisions based on what's right and you start making decision decisions based on what is

00:08:41.960 acceptable in your surroundings you stop building a life that's yours and you start performing like

00:08:50.860 a little circus monkey a life that plays well to the crowd like let me just get the claps let me

00:08:56.460 get the cheers let me get the accolades let me get the attaboys let me get the pats on the back

00:09:00.720 and then underneath you're dying and you know the man i'm describing you you might be that guy

00:09:07.680 the guy who won't actually share his real opinion in a room full of people the one

00:09:13.820 who shapes his personality depending on who he's talking to politicians do this all the time 0.90

00:09:19.720 gavin newsom is a perfect example of the perpetual coward who just changes his tune 1.00

00:09:25.780 based on who he's talking to and how anybody can like the guy a cowardly little bitch who just 1.00

00:09:31.980 placates to whoever he happens to be talking to i don't understand it that guy's not a man 1.00

00:09:37.880 he's not a man with a spine i mean at least somebody like bernie sanders who is the dumbest 1.00

00:09:45.300 dunce of them all at least i think he actually believes the bullshit that comes out of his mouth 1.00

00:09:50.300 at least he has a spine at least he doesn't change his message based on who he's talking to 0.99

00:09:57.060 so bernie sanders is a a grade above gavin newsome because the guy stands by what he says 0.99

00:10:05.200 even though he's dumb as shit but that's the problem is that there's men who just need the 0.99

00:10:12.120 validation they need the likes they need the compliments the nods of approval the pats on the 1.00

00:10:16.120 back the attaboys to feel like he's he's sure-footed he's on solid ground that's not sovereignty

00:10:23.520 that's actually servitude with slightly better optics gavin newsome is a puppet 0.98

00:10:32.540 ernie sanders at least he's convicted he's dumb but at least he's convicted so the fix is this 0.96

00:10:42.840 stop asking what will people think if blah blah blah and start asking what do i actually believe 0.97

00:10:50.700 what do i actually hold as truth build that internal scorecard for yourself a clear set

00:10:58.960 of values and standards that you measure yourself against not what the group thinks of you the

00:11:06.120 approval of men who don't share your values a man who chases validation is always running around

00:11:18.580 like a chicken with its head cut off never arriving at who he actually is but that sovereign

00:11:23.700 man I'm talking about says what he means. He owns what he believes. And then he lets other people

00:11:29.560 have their reactions. And that's okay. I have people who love what we do. I have people who

00:11:35.300 hate what we do. I have people who call me names. I have people who praise me and put me on a

00:11:39.520 pedestal. I don't belong. And I don't care about any of it. To the man who criticizes me, go ahead.

00:11:47.840 I've been criticized by greater men than you and to the man who praises me careful I'm a human being

00:11:57.340 but I will always have my own opinion all right number two is this addiction to comfort that we

00:12:04.100 have the second way that men relinquish our sovereignty is by surrendering to just comfort

00:12:12.620 ease here's the truth that I think a lot of guys don't want to hear

00:12:16.060 you cannot be comfortable and sovereign at the same time not completely at least

00:12:22.180 because sovereignty requires capacity it's the strength it's the resilience it's the mental and

00:12:29.520 physical durability and aptitude to handle adversity and can and and confront struggle and

00:12:37.300 challenge and comfort, it erodes that capacity. When a man builds and organizes his life around

00:12:47.580 avoiding discomfort, he is by definition ruled by his appetites, his lust, his depravity,

00:13:00.120 his degeneracy. He's not choosing. He's just defaulting to who he is as a man. And we know

00:13:07.060 biblically speaking that men are fallen we are all fallen and we have to actively work and reject

00:13:15.500 that idea a man who defaults to comfort in the easy moments will absolutely default to weakness

00:13:25.100 and cowardness and and being pathetic in the hard circumstances i i see men do this constantly

00:13:33.540 every day right they skip the hard workout they avoid the difficult conversation they numb out 0.84

00:13:40.140 with alcohol i've fallen prey to that personally or porn um or 12 hours of screen time i mean how

00:13:47.860 many hours of the day are you on your your phone doom scrolling over nothing rather than sitting

00:13:57.060 with the discomfort of an unresolved problem men like this choose the easy easy path so

00:14:03.900 they consistently lose the ability to choose anything else 0.99

00:14:11.480 that kind of guy has surrendered his self-governance to the immediate desires to his dick 1.00

00:14:21.200 or his, his, his lizard brain. He's no longer the captain of, of the meat sack that we operate in. 1.00

00:14:30.360 He's just a passenger. And the fix is to reframe your relationship with discomfort.

00:14:37.660 Voluntarily engaging in difficult things is not punishment. It's actually practice, if anything.

00:14:44.720 Because every time you do the hard thing, when you don't have to, you are reinforcing your

00:14:49.100 sovereignty. You're choosing to do something difficult. Cold shower. You don't need to do

00:14:53.980 that, but you do. A difficult conversation, everybody would excuse why you didn't have it,

00:14:59.160 but you do. That hard training session, nobody's there to hold you accountable to it, but you do

00:15:04.340 it anyways. Saying no to what's easy in favor of what's right, nobody's going to call you out on

00:15:12.360 that. In fact, they're probably going to reward you and acknowledge you and throw you praises

00:15:16.800 for doing the easy thing stack those decisions and you will build the kind of man who can handle

00:15:25.580 what life throws at him without flinching without wincing without crying without buckling without

00:15:31.180 coward this is what the world requires comfort is a reward at best but it's not a way of life

00:15:42.620 don't let comfort become your master all right let's talk about number three what i would call 0.92

00:15:49.880 digital dependency i'm not going to tell you that social media is evil i use it every single day i'm

00:15:56.120 not going to tell you something that that that is just easy to hear i'm going to tell you something

00:16:02.760 that's i think more important that the platforms and the algorithms and the feeds they are not

00:16:09.140 built for you to flourish. That goes for what I share too. What I share and what other people

00:16:16.240 share, it's built to capture your attention and then monetize it. I don't have any problem with

00:16:21.920 building a value or a product or an offering or a service or an event that you feel is valuable,

00:16:27.140 that you're willing to spend your time, money, and attention on. I don't have any problem with

00:16:30.180 that, but I'm honest about it. I'm honest about it. Most people aren't. A man whose attention

00:16:38.580 can be captured by anyone at any moment for any reason. That's not a sovereign man. Think about

00:16:45.240 how you start your morning. First thing you wake up, where does your mind go? If the answer is

00:16:51.860 your phone, then you've handed over the first moments of your life. And I call the first

00:17:00.160 moments of your day, the first moments of your life, but you've handed over the first moments

00:17:04.300 of your life to my agenda or David Goggins or Jocko or Chris Williamson or whoever it is that

00:17:12.060 you listen to, what would Andy Frisilla have to say about this? And I love Andy. He's a friend

00:17:20.780 of mine. I believe in what he's doing, but I'm not going to relinquish my thoughts over to Andy

00:17:26.140 or Jocko or Goggins or Chris Williamson or Phil and the Blake. I have my own thoughts. Sometimes

00:17:34.420 they align. Sometimes they don't. Sometimes I agree with Andy. Sometimes I don't.

00:17:41.160 But too many men are being led around like little puppets with the puppet master dangling the

00:17:46.860 strings, telling them that they need to do X, Y, and Z. They need to wake up at this time. They

00:17:53.400 need to do these five things when they wake up they need to uh talk with people this way they 0.99

00:17:58.580 need to do this exercise in this training regiment fuck that now clues are left everywhere and we 0.95

00:18:06.180 ought to take it into consideration but if you're not filtering it through your own lens of your 0.96

00:18:09.860 life then you're just giving it over to andy or somebody else i'm not interested in doing that

00:18:15.080 i don't even think he'd want you to do that i think he'd tell you the same

00:18:18.260 take what's good leave what's bad and make your own life okay so leave the news cycle

00:18:24.260 turn off the notifications stop commenting on every single comment that ever comes into your

00:18:30.880 social media feed your emotional tone if it's shaped by other people

00:18:37.500 man that's a recipe for disaster and over time this does something deeper than just waste your

00:18:45.760 time, it fragments your ability to think clearly. You're filtering it through Goggins as if he's

00:18:52.700 the God of all things that happen. Or Andrew Huberman. He says, if you do this, your chances

00:19:03.020 of whatever increase by 14% without actually realizing that 14% of 0.23 is something like

00:19:10.440 0.27. Don't check my math. But man, if I can get you to believe that if you do this one thing

00:19:18.980 wrong, that your chances of cancer are going to go up by 14%, then I've got you. I've got you

00:19:27.320 exactly where I want you. And then we stop thinking critically about it.

00:19:33.960 When you live your life vicariously through other people, it replaces genuine conviction

00:19:38.880 with what I would call curated outrage.

00:19:43.220 It is curated, by the way.

00:19:45.960 I can wake up tomorrow morning

00:19:48.000 and hold up social media

00:19:51.400 and tell very quickly

00:19:53.060 what I'm quote-unquote

00:19:54.800 supposed to be outraged about today.

00:19:58.140 And yet, it has little relevancy in my life.

00:20:02.200 When we do this,

00:20:03.060 it substitutes real relationships

00:20:04.900 with this simulation of connection.

00:20:08.880 It trains our brains to need constant external input.

00:20:12.760 Like, I'm doing this thing.

00:20:14.760 What does everybody else think?

00:20:15.900 Like, you have to run a poll just to make a decision.

00:20:19.380 That's not a free man.

00:20:21.200 That's a man on a leash. 0.99

00:20:22.760 Put a leash around your neck and have your wife carry you around on your hands and knees 1.00

00:20:28.000 and treat you like a little puppy dog because that's how you're acting.

00:20:30.900 And the fix is that you need to reclaim your attention as the sovereign resource it is.

00:20:38.880 set boundaries. How much time are you going to spend on social media?

00:20:44.580 How much time are you going to engage with people who aren't aligned with you?

00:20:49.080 How much time are you going to spend on the socials or on TV or on Netflix or

00:20:54.000 Prime, Amazon Prime, or watching UFC or whatever it is you do, just filtering all your decisions

00:21:01.720 through actors and athletes who know nothing about the real world that you're operating in?

00:21:09.820 So no phone the first hour of your morning.

00:21:13.160 Can you sit with your own thoughts?

00:21:14.580 Can you pray to God?

00:21:15.900 Can you get divine inspiration?

00:21:17.660 No social media until your most important work is done.

00:21:21.940 Own that input.

00:21:24.060 Decide what you let into your mind.

00:21:26.560 Decide what you spend your time on,

00:21:28.780 what you focus on,

00:21:30.320 and what you're going to refuse.

00:21:32.560 Because your attention, guys,

00:21:34.160 is one of the most powerful things that you have.

00:21:36.420 Stop giving it away.

00:21:38.880 All right. Number four, it's the abdication of responsibility.

00:21:46.780 This, this one shows up in a hundred, if not a thousand different forms. It's the man who

00:21:50.700 blames his upbringing for every current failure. I used to do this. Oh, my dad wasn't around. So

00:21:55.180 dot, dot, dot. What does that have to do with me? It's a 45 year old man.

00:22:02.400 People do this all the time. You may have done it like, Oh, my family, they, they, uh,

00:22:06.280 they didn't teach me these things you're 40 fucking five years old how long are you going 0.98

00:22:12.960 to blame your parents for the loser that you might currently be and i know that might sound 0.99

00:22:17.120 harsh but damn if somebody doesn't say it well i just i grew up in a bad horrible upbringing 1.00

00:22:23.860 you're 45 years old have you not learned anything 0.98

00:22:28.720 have you not found other people in your life who edify you and uplift you and pour into you

00:22:36.800 in positive ways if you haven't that's on you that's not on your parents oh my boss my boss 0.99

00:22:42.460 oh my boss he's such a jerk and he never let me promote and he always kept me down 0.99

00:22:46.980 you're 45 years old can't you find another job 1.00

00:22:50.420 oh the president oh the economy oh gas is six dollars oh they're up guys enough please

00:23:00.280 i had this thought years ago decades ago probably at this point if there's one person thriving in

00:23:08.540 the environment i'm complaining about then it's possible for me to do what i did not think i could

00:23:15.920 do but it's the self-limitation that i put on myself that told me and convinced me that this

00:23:25.540 was the way it was that life is hard that the economy is the reason i'm not successful that

00:23:31.720 my boss is the reason i didn't get promoted that my girlfriend or my wife is the reason i'm not

00:23:36.900 happy that my parents are the reason why i'm a loser and a failure no it's you at some point

00:23:45.680 your excuses they expire because there's guys who are like waiting for the economy to shift 0.52

00:23:55.400 for his boss to recognize him for his wife to change for the timing to be right before he takes

00:24:01.860 any action and here's the truth as long as you are holding someone else responsible for the condition

00:24:07.640 of your life, you are not sovereign over it. Someone else is. Are you willing to go

00:24:15.860 into your boss today and tell him, hey boss, you have control over my life? I hope the answer is

00:24:23.760 not yes, I would do that. But that's what you're doing when you tell everybody that your boss is

00:24:29.220 a jerk and that's why you're not achieving would you go to your wife and say hey wife whatever you 1.00

00:24:38.560 say goes i am at your beck and call i am at your mercy no you would not do that but you are doing 1.00

00:24:44.880 it when you're waiting for her to be better or to be this more ideal version of who you think she

00:24:51.760 ought to be if that's what's dictating the success of the relationship then you've given her the

00:24:57.780 reins and said, hey, babe, I am the beta. I am the cuck. I am at your mercy. 0.90

00:25:06.860 Guys, you cannot own your life if you don't own the outcomes. You can't be the author of your

00:25:12.500 story if you are constantly crying and whining and moaning and complaining about why somebody else

00:25:20.260 wrote bad chapters of your life i want you to be clear

00:25:24.180 i want you to to achieve i want you to know that it's within your control now look

00:25:30.180 terrible things happen to guys unfair things things that aren't your fault i'm not dismissing

00:25:36.460 that but there's a difference between acknowledging what happened and being permanently defined by it

00:25:44.500 One is honest.

00:25:46.160 These things happen.

00:25:47.660 The other is surrender.

00:25:49.560 I'm incapable of dealing with it.

00:25:52.900 So here's the fix for you.

00:25:54.420 Take ownership, full ownership, radical, no excuses, ownership.

00:25:59.920 Not just for your wins, but for your losses.

00:26:02.340 I mean, I've had heartbreak.

00:26:04.160 I've had business failures.

00:26:05.760 I've had financial setbacks.

00:26:07.120 I've had my marriage of 18 years eroded.

00:26:11.440 I own it.

00:26:14.020 It's not comfortable to sit in bed at night and lie awake and wonder why you created the

00:26:21.160 conditions that you have. But you have. You created it. And if I created it, I can either

00:26:30.500 uncreate it or I can create something new. I am responsible for where I am and where I'm going.

00:26:39.400 If you can say that to yourself, then you've reclaimed your sovereignty. Not because it's

00:26:43.540 comfortable it's not it's hard but because it's the only position that you can actually change

00:26:49.440 anything every excuse you hold on to is a shackle they're handcuffs drop them you're putting it

00:26:57.560 around your own wrists and then blaming it on somebody else it's you doing it not anybody else

00:27:03.880 last one today guys is identity outsourcing okay this this one's kind of a tricky one

00:27:09.320 but this is the fifth way that men relinquish their sovereignty it's probably the most dangerous

00:27:14.560 it's by letting other people define who you are

00:27:18.900 this is the guy whose sense of self is entirely dependent on external roles and labels i'm a

00:27:28.660 husband i'm a father i'm a veteran i'm a police officer i'm a doctor i'm an attorney i'm an

00:27:35.440 Insert your political tribe.

00:27:38.340 You know, maybe I'm a conservative or a liberal. 0.91

00:27:40.740 Now look, those things all might be true

00:27:42.600 and they matter.

00:27:43.740 Sure, of course they matter.

00:27:44.980 Labels matter.

00:27:45.520 That's why we put labels on them.

00:27:47.580 But if those labels are all of you,

00:27:50.780 what happens when one of them gets disrupted?

00:27:53.840 If you're a father and your child passes away,

00:27:55.940 heaven forbid, what happens to you?

00:27:57.560 If you're a husband and your wife files for divorce,

00:28:01.000 who are you then?

00:28:02.000 If you're a police officer and you age out

00:28:04.420 or become medically disqualified, who are you then?

00:28:08.740 When your marriage struggles or when your kids leave

00:28:12.800 or when you transition out of work,

00:28:15.420 I've seen men completely dissolve,

00:28:19.440 just erode and dissipate

00:28:21.700 when the role they built their identity around

00:28:23.780 was taken away or challenged and they're lost.

00:28:26.860 They are lost because they never did the deeper work

00:28:30.280 of deciding who they actually are,

00:28:32.340 not what they do like what do you actually believe what do you actually stand for independent of

00:28:39.660 i'm a sergeant or i'm a father of four or i'm a husband of 20 years or i'm a coach or i'm a this

00:28:48.060 or i'm a that or i'm a conservative who are you really

00:28:50.960 beyond the role beyond the dependency

00:28:56.460 look there's something even more corrosive happening here it's a cultural machine that

00:29:02.740 aggressively is trying to tell you who to be what masculinity should look like you might even

00:29:08.580 lump me into that category except for i have a track record of thousands and thousands of years

00:29:16.120 of human history because that's what i rely on not what i think order of man is but what

00:29:21.000 masculinity and manliness actually is. What values are acceptable? Maybe you turn to others

00:29:31.740 because you want to know what you're allowed to want, what kind of man you're permitted to become.

00:29:38.980 The sovereign man doesn't let the culture write his identity. He writes it himself. And the fix

00:29:44.640 to this is to do the internal work, to get clear on your values, not the one you inherited or

00:29:50.920 not the ones that your parents told you or not the ones that you saw on social media

00:29:54.920 or not the ones that the social media influencer told you, but the ones that are actually yours.

00:29:59.820 Build your own code. Define what kind of man you want to be and measure yourself against

00:30:05.920 that definition. Maybe it's Christ-centered. Maybe it's centered around the thousands of

00:30:13.360 people you've had interactions with. Maybe it's based on stoicism. I think the foundation for

00:30:18.640 me anyways Christ at the center of my identity is leads me to the best type of life I can live

00:30:25.200 but this is not a crowdsourced project here gents sure you can get inspiration from great places

00:30:33.500 but this is yours to build and to protect and to refine over time nobody gets to tell you who you 0.93

00:30:39.180 are you know often I met with guys on social media say well that's just your opinion no shit 0.97

00:30:45.200 and you ought to take it with a grain of salt. 0.87

00:30:51.080 That's not insulting to me when somebody says,

00:30:53.600 it's just your opinion.

00:30:54.640 Yeah, I know.

00:30:55.980 Because I know what the difference is

00:30:57.740 between fact and opinion.

00:30:59.400 I'm giving you my opinion, hoping that it will serve you,

00:31:02.360 but I don't get to dictate whether or not it will.

00:31:04.880 You have to make that decision.

00:31:08.440 Don't give other people the chance to decide who you are.

00:31:12.260 So let's bring this home today, guys.

00:31:15.200 sovereignty isn't some destination it's not something that you arrive at and then once

00:31:21.640 you have sovereignty you coast it's a daily practice of reclaiming your authority from

00:31:27.920 the institutions from the government from the social media influencers from the doctrine of

00:31:33.140 popular culture that wants you to toe the line when i was in the military we would do i don't

00:31:40.260 even know what they called it anymore but we were in our bay and they would do a showdown or a

00:31:44.440 shakedown i can't remember what they called it and we were to quite literally toe the line that

00:31:49.840 actually has a real meaning our toes were be to be on the line as the drill sergeant came and

00:31:56.000 inspected our bedding and our lockers to make sure everything was in uniform i know why they do that

00:32:02.840 but i'm not obligated at this point in my life to toe the line for anyone but god

00:32:09.200 so I'm not towing the line for you

00:32:12.520 I'm not towing the line for a woman 0.89

00:32:14.280 I'm not towing the line for a kid

00:32:16.180 even if they're my own

00:32:18.200 I toe the line for God

00:32:20.340 because I've decided to give my life to him

00:32:23.260 and everybody else

00:32:26.180 I don't want to be totally dismissive

00:32:30.540 because I do value the opinion of some people

00:32:34.200 but everybody else is less relevant

00:32:36.200 than the decisions I've made on my own

00:32:38.300 it's my attention it's my identity they're my standard it's my future nobody's going to pay

00:32:47.920 my bills nobody's going to have a relationship with my children if i die in fact if i die

00:32:53.300 nobody even cares sure i'll have a nice little memorial or funeral and i'm sure i'll have several

00:32:59.800 hundred people attend and everybody will cry for a couple of days and then i'm gone

00:33:05.160 done gone life over someone else will pick up the podcast or it'll just die with me i don't know

00:33:16.120 and it doesn't matter what matters is i'm doing what i want to be doing

00:33:23.560 men lose their sovereignty the way that most men lose everything it's not in some dramatic

00:33:31.160 moment, but slowly. Death by a thousand cuts. Death by small surrender. Seeking approval 0.53

00:33:36.740 instead of speaking truth. Choosing comfort over being capable. Giving our attention to anyone who

00:33:44.300 wants it or anyone who gives us a little bit of accolades. Handing responsibility to somebody

00:33:48.960 else. Letting the culture define you instead of defining it yourself. Each of those moments are

00:33:55.020 a choice. And it can also be made in reverse. And the question that I want you sitting with this

00:34:00.360 week is simple. Where have you given the controls to other people? That's not rhetorical, by the

00:34:07.900 way. I actually want you to answer that. Where have you given control over your life to other

00:34:12.360 people? Identify that specific area of your life that you've stopped being the author and you

00:34:17.600 started just being the passenger and then decide with intention to take it back. If you become the

00:34:24.100 whipping boy of your wife and you do everything she says like a good little dog, you know, my kids 0.74

00:34:28.900 often joke is they'll say, good boy, because they're mocking me when I do something they 0.96

00:34:33.500 want me to. It's a joke. I understand it as a joke, but also it's not a joke because that's

00:34:39.940 what society wants you to do. They want to pat you on the head and they want you to be a good

00:34:44.100 little boy. Better yet, a good little bitch. Don't be that guy. That's the work. That's always been 1.00

00:34:51.100 the work is to reclaim your sovereignty. Since 2018, when I wrote that book, if you want more

00:34:56.380 information on this, go to Sovereignty, the battle for the hearts and minds of men on Amazon,

00:35:00.920 pick up a copy or go to store at store.orderofman.com and you can pick up a signed copy of

00:35:06.900 Sovereignty there. Or if you want, join us in the Iron Council where all of us are reclaiming

00:35:11.700 sovereignty. Yes, I sit at the head of this organization and movement, but I still want

00:35:15.600 men to create their own lives. And if you want to check that out, we've got a preview call coming up.

00:35:20.560 go to orderofman.com slash ironcouncil.

00:35:25.080 All right, guys.

00:35:27.440 We've got the weekend coming up.

00:35:29.140 We've got a lot of work to do.

00:35:30.480 How are you going to reclaim your sovereignty this weekend?

00:35:34.060 Think about it and implement it as we move forward.

00:35:38.280 All right, guys.

00:35:39.440 We'll be back next week for an interview.

00:35:41.420 Until then, go out there, take action,

00:35:43.300 reclaim your sovereignty,

00:35:44.840 and become the man you are meant to be.

00:35:46.940 thank you for listening to the order of man podcast you're ready to take charge of your

00:35:52.740 life and be more of the man you were meant to be we invite you to join the order at orderofman.com

Order of Man - May 29, 2026

5 Ways Men Relinquish Their Sovereignty ｜ FRIDAY FIELD NOTES

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript