Order of Man - Addressing the Rot in America, Holding Others to High Standards, and the Lies We Tell Ourselves ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest, embrace your fears, and boldly chart

00:00:04.980 your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time, every time.

00:00:10.420 You are not easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong. This is your life. This is who

00:00:17.220 you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,

00:00:22.780 you can call yourself a man. Kip, what's going on, man? Thanks for joining me on another Ask Me

00:00:28.600 anything. It's good. It'll be fun. You mentioned this earlier. It'll be fun to shake things up and

00:00:33.940 get some questions from your Instagram account. I didn't realize how many, do you normally get that

00:00:40.180 many questions when you do posts? Yeah, I do. Yeah, it's quite a bit. Yeah, I didn't. I've only

00:00:48.480 done those Ask Me Anything type things on Instagram a couple of times and both of them, you know, over

00:00:53.680 like 200 comments. So it gets a little insane over there at times, which is good. I like it. You

00:00:59.680 know, it's nice that people are engaged and I try to get to as many questions as I can, but yeah,

00:01:04.060 I can't get to them all. So I thought this would be a great place to do it. Yeah. And what's great

00:01:08.180 also is it removes the pressure from me to pronounce names correctly because these aren't even names.

00:01:13.180 Oh, that's true. I didn't even think about that. Yes. I didn't even know how to. It was Ezra Kigi G.

00:01:20.380 Well, you already, whatever that is. You already messed up right there on the first one because I'm

00:01:25.180 sure that's not what it is. No, but I am Danny. I am Danny boy. Or maybe I have to spell these. I

00:01:32.560 don't even know. Or do we just skip the names altogether or I'll give it a good run? It's like a,

00:01:37.620 like a license plate where you're trying to like piece together a custom license plate,

00:01:41.340 what it says. And it can say a thousand different things depending on where you place the breaks.

00:01:45.360 Like some are right. Some are inappropriate. So you just make up your own, man. Just roll with it.

00:01:50.380 Yeah. Yeah. I love it. All right. So let's get into it. Yeah. No worries. Yeah. So we've alluded to

00:01:56.400 this already. Um, these questions will be filled in from Ryan Mickler's Instagram account to follow

00:02:02.180 Ryan there. It's at Ryan Mickler. That's M I C H L E R. Correct. I'm assuming I don't need to spell 0.56

00:02:08.980 Ryan for you guys since we're a little bit more educated crowd that listens to this podcast.

00:02:14.000 Yeah. Well, I don't know. We'll, we'll, we'll determine that based on the questions that we

00:02:17.020 answer today. Sounds good. All right. So our first question, here we go. Pop M Chris,

00:02:24.700 how goes the hunt to have three major podcasters on and three major podcasts to be on?

00:02:30.560 Uh, it goes, it's going good. You know, every, every day I send out invites and messages and I'm

00:02:37.120 reaching out and trying to network and communicate with other people, uh, which is, you know, something

00:02:42.440 I do fairly well at asking if people will make connections. So, uh, I've got probably, I would

00:02:48.340 say like eight or nine, um, high caliber podcast guest requests at this point. And another three to

00:02:55.020 five where I've requested to go on other shows. Sometimes it takes a while, you know, sometimes I get a

00:02:59.700 no or a no response. And so I try to flank them and work a different angle and make a connection

00:03:04.560 and ask somebody else to introduce me. Uh, so it just takes time. You know, we've got like Jordan

00:03:08.740 Peterson is in queue, not in queue, but in that lineup. Um, Dan Crenshaw, somebody I reached out

00:03:15.860 to Ross Edgley is another individual. I just reached out to, uh, Mark Manson, another individual I reached

00:03:21.560 out to, uh, Mike Rowe has turned me down four or five times, but that won't deter me. So

00:03:29.240 welcome to the life of a podcaster. Yeah. I don't take any of that personal. Like I get it. People

00:03:36.260 reach out to me all the time for, to, to be on their podcast. And I say yes to about 80% of them

00:03:41.660 and 20% I, for whatever reason, I, you know, I'm, I'm busy or, or maybe my message, I don't feel like

00:03:48.060 will resonate with their audience. And so I turn those down, but, uh, yeah, I don't take it personally.

00:03:51.980 It's just people are busy and have to make choices on what podcast to, to join them, which one's not too.

00:03:56.100 Totally. Well, and, and I don't know about you, but I have people reach out to me all the time

00:04:00.640 and I overlook it like, and it's not even intentional or it's not intended to be a no,

00:04:07.160 it's just busy or misunderstood who the individual was or something else. I think a perfect example of

00:04:13.980 that is, uh, as you know, I reached out to JP Danell and I'm texting him like, Hey JP, let's,

00:04:19.820 let's meet tomorrow. And he like, Oh yeah, yeah. Let's meet. And then he goes dark. And then again,

00:04:26.080 I'm like, so are we, you know, are we going to meet or what's going on? And then, Oh yeah,

00:04:30.700 yeah. And then he goes dark. And I'm like, Oh my gosh, this guy's like blowing me off. And then

00:04:34.060 eventually he's like, dude, I had your number mixed up with someone else's number. I thought it was like

00:04:38.020 some spamming person. I'm so sorry. Yeah. I'm like, yeah. But the average person probably would have

00:04:43.680 already like, Hey, Oh, run some story about how this guy doesn't care and whatever. And I would

00:04:49.860 have stopped reaching out because I assumed that he was blowing me off when we're out of this

00:04:53.960 misunderstanding. So, well, it's funny because I used to make up those stories and they always

00:04:58.420 went negative. Like, Oh, he's blowing me off. He doesn't care about what we're doing. And I always

00:05:02.660 went negative. And then somewhere along the way it clicked that I'm just, I'm lying, right? I'm,

00:05:06.920 I'm making up a story with faulty assumptions. So if I'm going to make up a story, like why not just

00:05:12.080 make a positive one? Yeah. You know, like he really wants to be on the podcast. He just lost

00:05:16.460 my number. Like that, that could be just as true as he hates me as a human being. So like,

00:05:22.600 if you're going to make up a story, just make up one that serves you, not one that hinders you.

00:05:26.000 Yeah. I love that. That's a really good point. That's great. All right. Come back. Gray beard.

00:05:32.800 Most manly president from each century.

00:05:36.820 From each century.

00:05:38.940 I know. I read this question. I thought we should probably Google it.

00:05:42.080 I would say George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, Theodore Roosevelt.

00:05:49.780 There you go. There's the list.

00:05:52.000 Easy. All right.

00:05:53.260 Give me a hard one.

00:05:55.160 Chris edge, Chris edge official tips on creating a tribe while under self-isolation and travel

00:06:02.680 restriction protocols.

00:06:04.060 I mean, we're doing it here. You know, you've got zoom and you've got Facebook groups and you've got

00:06:09.120 Google hangouts and all kinds of chat options and digital technology. So what I would do,

00:06:15.860 especially if you're trying to build a tribe with other men is to rally around some sort of common

00:06:21.880 purpose or even better in a lot of cases is a common enemy. And that enemy might be the spare tire

00:06:28.540 that's around your belly. It might be, I don't know, a sports team that you guys all despise,

00:06:35.460 but you really like this other team better. And so you talk about that. I don't know. Or

00:06:38.800 whatever, you know, maybe there's a physical challenge or reading books or whatever, but it

00:06:45.920 needs to be centered around having some sort of challenge built into it and a reason to actually

00:06:52.540 meet. Cause in my experience, dudes just, they don't want to hang out and chat about their feelings

00:06:58.460 or whatever. Now you can work some of that in and you probably ought to do that, but it has to be

00:07:03.920 centered around something more meaningful and significant than, Hey, let's discuss how we feel

00:07:08.760 about the Corona virus. Like nobody wants to do that. Men don't want to do that. Women may be more 1.00

00:07:13.920 so generally, but men certainly don't. This is why churches have such a difficult time because

00:07:18.500 we're supposed to sit around and like hold each other's hands and like talk about our feelings and

00:07:22.760 sing Kumbaya. And I'm like, I don't want to do that. So you have to get some element of challenge,

00:07:28.300 uh, some element of even confrontation, not, not in a negative way, but in a healthy way.

00:07:35.920 Yeah. Uh, and then some element of, of struggle and, and pain, maybe even a little bit to overcome

00:07:42.840 and to work together and to work through. I think that's a much more valuable way to do it for men.

00:07:46.620 So yeah, just use some digital technology, get some guys together and just say, Hey,

00:07:50.640 we're going to meet. Here's another thing. Another tip I'd give you is just pick a time

00:07:56.020 and then schedule it and make that work. Like don't ask, Hey, when do you guys want to hang

00:08:01.940 out? And like, what works best for you guys? Like that's a passive way of doing it. And it's not

00:08:07.020 going to work because there isn't one time that works great for everybody. And everybody's kind of

00:08:11.180 dancing around, hoping somebody else will finally take, take charge. You need to take charge

00:08:15.480 and then realize that if you say, okay, well, we're going to meet every Wednesday night at seven

00:08:21.160 o'clock. And, uh, here's the link. Realize that the first time you do it, it might be you by yourself

00:08:28.440 or you and one other guy. But if you maintain consistency, that's very, very important.

00:08:34.180 Whether you're trying to start a tribe for a business endeavor, like maybe we're doing here

00:08:38.920 with order of man or just personal reasons, you have to maintain consistency. An example of that

00:08:45.480 is years ago, uh, me and a neighbor of mine wanted to play basketball like on Tuesday or Wednesday

00:08:50.900 night at the church. And so him and I went, we'd have like two guys. Sometimes we'd have four guys

00:08:56.040 show up. And it was like that for weeks, five or six weeks. And then all of a sudden we had six guys

00:09:00.600 show up and eight guys show up. And then before we ended up shutting it down and switching nights,

00:09:05.960 we'd have like 25 dudes show up consistently. So like nobody could play. So we actually left,

00:09:12.440 they kept doing it, I think for a while. And we started another one, but it, it, it takes that

00:09:17.120 level of consistency to be able to build it up because people need to know you're serious and

00:09:22.740 they don't, it's not that they don't trust you individually. They just don't trust people in

00:09:28.200 general because most people fall short of what it is they say they want to do. And so the trust comes

00:09:34.600 into play because they think it's, it's going to die out anyway. So why? What a waste of time.

00:09:39.880 And, and like who wants to, who wants to be part of an organization or a group while they're working

00:09:46.000 the kinks out? Nobody does. They want to be part of a winning organization that has a proven track 0.99

00:09:52.880 record of success. So you actually need to prove that. And you know, you're going to have early

00:09:57.660 adopters and you're going to have friends who come, uh, but in order to grow it to the level that

00:10:02.500 you're wanting to, it just takes just a diehard consistency towards doing that thing and letting

00:10:09.220 it ride. Yeah. Cool. All right. GWU wrestling favorite nonfiction fiction. Wait, favorite what?

00:10:19.400 Uh, I'm assuming a book or maybe a movie. Uh, favorite nonfiction or fiction. Oh, I just thought

00:10:27.060 you said favorite nonfiction fiction. I'm like, I don't know what that is, but I didn't pause. Oh,

00:10:31.480 okay. I'm like, what is a nonfiction fiction? Um, favorite nonfiction, man. There's so many wild

00:10:41.380 at heart sticks out like that's something really, really good. It was, that was life altering for me.

00:10:46.900 Wild at heart by John Eldridge man's search for meaning by Viktor Frankl. Yeah. Sovereignty by Ryan

00:10:53.620 Mickler. That one might be a little biased. Um, as a man thinketh by James Allen extreme ownership

00:11:03.440 by Jocko Willink atomic habits by James clear. I don't know. Just go through the podcast. There's

00:11:08.780 so many, but there's five, uh, fiction. Well, I'm reading savage son by Jack Carr right now. My podcast

00:11:16.860 with him comes out next week. So that that's that series. If you aren't reading the, the James re series,

00:11:21.940 like read it. It's all by Jack Carr, terminalist, true believer. And then this third installment,

00:11:28.080 which is savage son. Um, I'm also reading the road by, uh, uh, Cormac McCarthy. I can't,

00:11:35.960 I can't think, I couldn't think of his name. Um, that's probably not a great one to read right now

00:11:40.800 because it's about this like apocalypse and this dad's trying to survive with his son. So like,

00:11:45.620 I don't know that that's like the best read right now, but it's actually very, very fascinating.

00:11:49.220 That's called the road. I think I said that, uh, I don't read a whole lot of fiction,

00:11:53.840 but those are, those are a couple. The book that we're reading, um, was the too soon old,

00:12:00.680 too late smart. That's really good book. I don't know why, but it's like, I am so drawn to that

00:12:07.780 book. I'm like, I'm already buying like the hard copy because the audio I'm like, and I'm going to

00:12:12.620 read, listen to audio probably a handful of times. And it's really insightful.

00:12:17.160 Yeah. There are so many great books out there. It's hard to like, just pick a couple, but yeah,

00:12:21.280 just, there's a lot of them. All right. Caesar Muir. What is that one up? I know.

00:12:31.440 What is a virtue that a man needs to possess? Pronouncing names. 0.97

00:12:38.140 Yes. Uh, man, there's a lot strength, fortitude, grit, resiliency, uh, resolve.

00:12:43.580 Talking about books. Sovereignty has a, a good explanation of all of those.

00:12:48.660 Yeah. Um, yeah, I'm, I'm trying to think like his, uh, an ability to communicate effectively.

00:12:55.520 It's actually one that a lot of people overlook. He needs to be a great communicator. If you're

00:12:59.360 going to lead, you got to be able to communicate effectively. Yeah. Uh, patience is something a lot

00:13:03.740 of people overlook. You know, there's a lot of things that don't happen the way that you would

00:13:06.960 like them to happen or on your timeline. Certainly true for me. Uh, so just exercising what Andy

00:13:12.380 Frisilla would call, uh, I think he calls it, uh, aggressive patience where you're being patient,

00:13:17.080 but you're still working towards the thing. It's not idle. It's not passive. It's still active and

00:13:22.960 engaged, but you're being patient in the result that it will produce, man. There's just so many

00:13:27.900 virtues that you need to possess. Uh, but I, I think those are the ones that come to the top of,

00:13:33.920 of my mind. Fortitude. Generally, when you think of men, you think of fortitude, grit, strength,

00:13:39.700 resilience. Those are what we would consider masculine virtues, not exclusive to men, but

00:13:45.500 masculine virtues. And then you have the feminine virtues, not to diminish them by any means, but

00:13:50.240 love, kindness, empathy, uh, nurturing. Those are the feminine virtues, which I think men ought to 0.86

00:13:57.800 possess to some degree as well. You know, we can exhibit those characteristics and not be thought of

00:14:03.040 as a woman or less manly. I think we should possess all of those things. Okay. Kyle Renard with the

00:14:13.600 tricky dynamics of a nuclear family, how would you suggest that a 20 something son on his own journey

00:14:19.600 towards being a man, encourage older males in his family to pursue the same things in their lives?

00:14:24.460 Why should they pursue the same things? I mean, you're, you're 20 years old. Uh, they're older

00:14:31.720 than you. I don't know if this is your father or your siblings or your mother. I don't know, but

00:14:35.500 they, they shouldn't necessarily follow the same things that you're following. Now there's some

00:14:41.400 general things like being a good human being, trying to make yourself more capable, developing a

00:14:45.780 new skillset, things that we would generally consider worthwhile objectives, regardless of the

00:14:51.060 specific specificity of your, of your goals and objectives. Um, but you know, lead by example,

00:14:58.460 uh, connect the dots, show them how, what you are doing is actually yielding and producing the

00:15:03.180 desired result for you and how it might produce the result for them. Uh, be empathetic, you know,

00:15:07.720 just listen to them. What is it that they're trying to accomplish? And if you listen, they're,

00:15:11.480 they're probably going to be more likely to listen to you and to be open and receptive to what it is

00:15:15.780 that you might have to share. Uh, but generally people flock to those who are successful and they

00:15:22.040 don't necessarily flock to those who aren't. So if you're producing some metric of success,

00:15:28.260 it's been my experience that people will flock to you and try to figure out how you're producing

00:15:32.840 that result in your life. And that's a great opportunity for you to shine. It's a great

00:15:36.840 opportunity for you to educate and lead and motivate and inspire. Uh, but a lot of the times they'll come

00:15:43.060 to you when you exude that level of confidence, uh, confidence that, that has been earned.

00:15:49.260 I I've said this before in past podcasts and on social media that I had a mentor, one of my

00:15:54.940 original mentors said to me, Ryan, you'll be successful when you learn to light yourself on

00:15:59.080 fire and allow others to watch you burn. I was like, what in the world does that mean? You know,

00:16:04.340 but I know now it's like light yourself on fire, like find something that's, that's driving you.

00:16:09.960 That's motivating you, that you're passionate and excited about it and let

00:16:12.940 other people experience it and be influenced by it. The hard part though, is that if you think

00:16:18.580 about fire, obviously this is a metaphor, but if you think about it literally and metaphorically,

00:16:24.380 it's painful, right? Fire is painful. You get burned. It hurts. And you have to be able to endure

00:16:30.420 that to be able to, uh, to shine for other people. Same thing metaphorically, you know,

00:16:36.340 I get mocked and ridiculed and people say some crazy and strange things and dismiss what I'm doing.

00:16:42.500 And everything else under the sun that you could possibly imagine, but that, and that's the pain,

00:16:47.640 right? That's the sacrifice. And that's what it's required to be an example to those who would be

00:16:53.660 influenced by what it is you're doing. So lead by example and connect the dots for people.

00:16:59.140 I found peace as I get older, not caring about, not influencing. It's not necessarily that,

00:17:07.360 but trying to convince people to see my point of view and being content with where I'm at and how

00:17:14.500 I feel about things. I'm assuming Ryan, that helps you be ridiculed. That allows you to do what you're

00:17:21.160 doing and not be so tied up in the disapproval of the sum. Well, here's, here's how I look at it.

00:17:28.240 So a lot of people say, Oh man, you're, you, you have to develop thick skin in order to do what you do.

00:17:33.340 No, you don't. You just need to be indifferent. Right. Because like be okay with people seeing

00:17:39.020 it differently. Yeah. Because look, if I'm indifferent to somebody's opinion, then it

00:17:45.260 doesn't hurt. And I don't need to have any sort of thick skin in order to endure it. I'm indifferent.

00:17:49.760 I could care less. Yeah. Could not care less. I should say. Right. So, um, yeah, that's, that's what

00:17:57.500 I've been able to do. Like I look at somebody's results in their life and if they're not producing

00:18:02.280 favorable results or results that I'm after, then I'm indifferent to what they have to say.

00:18:07.700 They don't know me. They don't understand anything about my life. They're not producing what it is

00:18:11.500 I'm after. Uh, so what, what does anything good or bad that they could have to say affect or impact

00:18:18.360 me? That's why I always also try to take compliments with a grain of salt. I don't feel like

00:18:24.220 you can take criticism with a grain of salt and not take compliments with a grain of salt.

00:18:31.280 Like I try not to read too deeply into compliments either, which is kind of counterintuitive. But

00:18:36.120 look, if I'm not going to read deeply into criticism, then I shouldn't be able to read

00:18:39.980 too deeply into compliments. Like you can't have both. You either need to be indifferent to both of

00:18:46.340 them or somewhere on the scale with both of them. But I think you really ought to take both with a grain

00:18:50.600 of salt. If you start to believe that everything that somebody says good about you is right

00:18:55.660 and nothing bad is right.

00:18:58.620 And when they say something bad, yeah. When they say something bad about you, then

00:19:00.740 what?

00:19:01.560 Exactly.

00:19:02.160 You could throw that out now.

00:19:03.680 Now, now if somebody pays me a compliment that I, that I believe is genuine, that I actually believe

00:19:08.640 about myself, then okay. Yeah. Thank you. And if somebody has a criticism for me and they do it

00:19:13.620 respectfully and it's something that I'm aware of or something I ought to be aware of, then I can say,

00:19:19.120 thank you for exposing that and letting, letting me know. I don't always handle that the best. Cause

00:19:23.000 like us all, we, you know, I have an ego and you know, I got to be careful of that, but yeah.

00:19:28.740 Cool. Ryan Landis, favorite novel. Is that the same book that you're mentioning earlier or

00:19:35.180 where, where'd you have a favorite novel? Favorite novel.

00:19:40.800 Yeah. Again, like when I think of novel, I think of like fictional work and I just don't read,

00:19:46.500 I don't read a whole lot of fiction. I mean, the only one I remember even from when I was growing

00:19:50.180 up was like old man in the sea, uh, like Jack London stuff. I had to read. Yeah. Choose your

00:19:57.000 own adventures. Yeah. Jack London stuff was always fascinating and intriguing to me. So yeah, I don't

00:20:02.240 have a favorite novel, but I gave some earlier. So I think we're good there.

00:20:04.560 All right. Joshua Brood, where did this version of restore masculinity come from? And what was the

00:20:11.220 first step you took to make this vision a reality? It doesn't come from just one place. I'm assuming

00:20:17.320 when he talks about the version of restore masculinity, I'm assuming maybe he's talking

00:20:21.520 about protect, provide, preside, I think is maybe what he's alluding to or what it means to be a man,

00:20:25.800 at least my interpretation of it. Well, where did this vision to restore masculinity come from?

00:20:30.200 Sorry. I may have said version. Oh, vision of it. Okay. Yeah. So the vision for order of man,

00:20:36.760 I guess is what he's asking. Okay. Yeah. Sorry. No, it's good. Uh, man, I, I,

00:20:42.700 it wasn't like a grand epiphany. It wasn't like one day I woke up because I had this dream and the

00:20:49.180 angels came and spoke to me and told me what I should be doing or anything like that. Like

00:20:53.260 it was just, Hey, you know, you should start a podcast and interview men so you can learn and grow

00:20:58.120 and be better because you have conversations with them. Oh, and long into that. Did it,

00:21:02.520 did it come about restoring masculinity? Cause I'm assuming the podcast originally was kind of like,

00:21:07.000 Hey, resources help men become better men. You know, was there a point where it's like, Whoa,

00:21:12.660 to become better men, a lot of this has to do with restoring masculinity back to the way it was

00:21:18.480 necessarily just helping men as a good resource. Yeah. I mean that, that doesn't happen again in one

00:21:24.060 swift move. It just evolves and grows and expands over time. And I spend a lot of time thinking

00:21:28.700 about it. It's influenced by books. Like I just mentioned, one is wild at heart and others.

00:21:34.080 Uh, and then I read things and I see things and there's other men that I'm influenced and inspired

00:21:38.220 by, but you can't solve a problem that people don't know exists or, or doesn't exist. Like I,

00:21:45.780 I think some people make up problems too. And I, I try not to make up problems. Uh, but I,

00:21:52.160 I realized that if I wanted to inspire men to, to be motivated and educated and learn what it is

00:21:57.240 we're doing, then I have to begin to identify, is there even a problem? And I saw this because I was

00:22:02.100 having conversations with hundreds of men who were dealing with some very similar issues and they

00:22:07.200 generally fall into two, three, four, five different camps. And you begin to see pretty quickly

00:22:11.840 the, the lack of, of masculine role models, uh, the dismissal and mockery of masculinity in society

00:22:19.920 and the undermining of it. Uh, the negative ramifications that come when, uh, men aren't

00:22:25.920 stepping up the way they ought to be stepping up. Yeah. I see that so often. And I spent a lot of

00:22:31.480 time in contemplation and reflection. I just pulled something up here that I was working on today.

00:22:36.280 And I'm just, just kind of overviewing, like why we're doing what we're doing and what is our

00:22:41.060 mission statement. And I'll read a little bit of this to you. It's very, very rough. Like,

00:22:46.820 cause I was just thinking about it this morning and just, I do this all the time, but here it is

00:22:51.800 very simply. Our mission is to enlist, train and inspire an army of moral and capable fathers,

00:22:56.440 husbands, business owners, community leaders, men. Uh, our mission is accomplished by equipping

00:23:01.160 men with the tools, resources, conversations, and accountability required to thrive on the personal

00:23:05.620 and professional front. Uh, the men who band with us are committed to improving themselves so that

00:23:10.280 they may more adequately be able to serve those under their care. They are well-rounded in their

00:23:14.520 approach to the mantle of masculinity and focus equally on their mental, emotional, physical,

00:23:18.760 and spiritual health. Uh, and then just some sub notes here is believing that being a man is a

00:23:24.080 calling. They strive to answer going through code of conduct. Another segment in this document I'm

00:23:29.400 writing right now is why does any of this matter? The problems that we address, who exactly we serve,

00:23:36.060 where we serve them, how we serve them. So these are things that I'm very, very deliberate and

00:23:41.180 intentional about that. I spend a lot of time in reflection and that I'm influenced by in every

00:23:46.120 way, every single day of my life through the books that I'm reading. I'm looking at it through the

00:23:49.980 lens. I'm looking at life through the lens of the work that we do. So when I'm driving down the road

00:23:56.000 and I see a billboard, it's seen through the lens of helping men be the men they're capable of becoming

00:24:03.480 right. When I'm reading a book, even if it's a fictional work, I'm looking at it through the lens of

00:24:08.100 how does this apply to making me a better man? Just because it's something I've poured everything

00:24:13.400 into. So I look at, look at it through that lens and it's not a surprise that I find the answers

00:24:17.740 I'm looking for. Yeah. Yeah. I can't, you can't help but think the importance of a vision, something

00:24:24.040 that it's related to the document you just read that was clear on my mind. Literally just yesterday,

00:24:29.040 I was thinking about this as, you know, why is that so important? You know, when we do our battle

00:24:33.900 plans, why is vision so critical to establishing goals and living a productive life? And I, and I

00:24:41.540 think at the root of it is, and it comes back from that, that book that we're, that we're reading this

00:24:47.300 month about, he mentions in that book at one point that to find happiness, one must have a sense of

00:24:54.300 belonging, purpose, and something to look forward to. Hmm.

00:24:58.860 And, and I think that we create that, right? You've created that in the order of man, uh, and

00:25:05.820 in an iron council where maybe men that, that didn't have their purpose defined, we're able to

00:25:12.540 come together and to find it and create it, not just find it. I, and I shouldn't even use that word,

00:25:17.340 create that purpose, um, and have something to look forward to and have a mission. Um, and it's just so

00:25:24.280 powerful when we are able to define who and how we show up in life.

00:25:31.240 Yeah, I agree. You know, I'm, I'm just writing some notes down here, but, uh, we were talking about

00:25:36.640 the use of the word, uh, find, and I definitely like create better than find, but I like the word

00:25:44.200 articulate even more than create. Cause create almost says like, I'm just going to take it out of

00:25:49.680 thin air and like create this thing. And how do you, right. And, and I, and I'm not like, I get it,

00:25:55.600 you know, I think we're on the same page, but the reason I like articulate, or maybe there's even a

00:25:59.160 better word is because to me, it invokes thoughts of, uh, a, a sculptor, an amazing sculptor. Who's

00:26:06.580 like working on this block of granite. I think it was Michelangelo who said, uh, I, I didn't create

00:26:12.640 David or whatever. Like he was already there. It was my job to chisel the stone away, to reveal him

00:26:17.920 something along those lines. And that's what I feel like I'm doing on myself personally, even

00:26:24.160 like physically, for example, you know, it was like, it's not about creation. It's about the

00:26:29.440 pinnacle of masculinity that I personally can reach. And then how do I put pressure and stress

00:26:36.740 on myself and, and challenge in a way that reveals who I'm meant to be, who I'm capable of becoming.

00:26:45.260 It's already there. We just have to strip things away, refine mold craft, and then reveal who it is

00:26:52.320 that we have the power to be. I like that because that plays into the concept of, of you having a

00:26:58.560 divine nature and works really well with those that are religious in regards to creation versus

00:27:04.640 articulating, because it's kind of respect to our creator that, you know, we didn't just create

00:27:10.520 ourselves. Right. Well, look, and to play the opposite side of that, and I'm religious, but

00:27:16.320 let's, let's say somebody's listening. Who's not, I still think there's value in doing it that way

00:27:21.700 because it gives us some sort of noble target to hit. Like I could, for example, I believe that you

00:27:27.620 can be an atheist and still be a good human being and still have moral, a moral compass and still have

00:27:33.860 goals and desires and ambitions. You know, I believe that. So even if you're not religious or

00:27:39.100 spiritual in any nature, you, you still have objectives. And now you see this person, this man

00:27:46.480 that you're striving to become, and you're chipping everything away and you're refining and you're

00:27:50.240 molding and you're shaping. I don't, I don't necessarily think that as an exclusive to spirituality,

00:27:56.440 it's just ambitious thought, you know? So it works from both ways, I think. Yeah. And as a level of

00:28:02.620 ownership to it, which I, of course we enjoy here for sure. Well, and then also I think you can look

00:28:09.140 at, and this has been helpful for me. I think most people know the metaphor of two wolves, you know,

00:28:14.200 you have the evil wolf and the good wolf inside of you. And then which one wins the one you feed,

00:28:18.660 right? We've all heard stories like that. Well, the same thing is true with the man that we have a

00:28:24.560 capability of becoming and the man that we currently are. Like I'm not at the pinnacle of my

00:28:28.340 achievement, right? So when I'm about to engage in an activity, whatever that activity may be,

00:28:33.880 I need to ask myself, what would the ideal version of myself do? This is called conscious thought.

00:28:39.080 We can project ourselves out and do a future date. One that does not exist yet. And look at what that

00:28:44.580 individual would do. And then come back into reality and say, Oh, okay. That person would make this

00:28:50.020 decision. And then you make this decision. And then you start working towards that ideal version you have

00:28:54.380 of yourself. It's just reverse engineering. Yeah. Love it. Can you hear my chair squeaking by the

00:29:01.840 way? Like my chair is really squeaking here. I need to tighten that thing up. I'm animated, man. I got

00:29:07.760 to move. And so like, you know, I got to tighten that thing up today. Uh, all right. Uh,

00:29:15.880 A and 85, uh, do you and the family have a favorite television show that you are watching?

00:29:21.540 No. No. All right. I can't. I don't. Nothing. No. Um, no, my kids watch a show called kicking it.

00:29:35.360 And so they watch that and they watch, uh, Oh, you, okay. I'll take this back. There is one

00:29:42.780 actually right now that we like, uh, it's a Lego masters. Lego masters. Yeah. It's a people making

00:29:50.120 Legos. It is. It's a competition. There's like nine teams or whatever, and they all compete. And

00:29:54.560 I think the guy's name is Will Arnett. He's Batman and, uh, on the Lego movie. Yeah. Anyways,

00:30:01.200 he's the host of it. And so, yeah, we love that show. Lego masters. It's awesome.

00:30:06.460 You and Legos, man. I love it, man. We all love it. I got the Batmobile sitting right there.

00:30:10.700 I saw that 1989 Batmobile. I got it for my birthday a couple of days ago, 3,300 pieces.

00:30:18.060 And it is amazing. I stayed up till two o'clock the other night fixing it. I was just building it.

00:30:24.000 And my wife's like, Hey, like, I'm going to go get ready for bed. I'm like, cool. Yeah. Just come 1.00

00:30:27.300 down when you're ready. And I kept building. And she's like, Hey, I'm going to go read. I'm like,

00:30:30.880 yeah, cool. I'll be up there in a minute. And then she comes down. She's like, Hey, 0.92

00:30:33.440 I'm going to go to bed. I'm like, Oh yeah, I'll be there really shortly. And then I finish it.

00:30:36.500 And I'm like, Oh, it's two o'clock. Holy cow. She comes down. I'm going to the grocery store.

00:30:43.780 That's right. You call me up. You're like, Hey, I'm on the zoom meeting. Like,

00:30:47.640 are you going to join me for the recording today? You're like five more blocks. Just give me five

00:30:51.840 more blocks. I'm almost done. So that's our favorite show right now. Duke cannons. Can America be

00:30:57.740 saved from the rot that's deep within our government? Uh, not in its current form.

00:31:06.360 No, I didn't always used to believe that. I'm like, no, there's still good people and we can

00:31:10.440 save this. And I believe that that's the case. There are good people and we can save this country,

00:31:15.960 but I don't believe in its current form that we can. It's, it's a, it's a very scary thing to

00:31:23.320 actually consider and think about, but the politicians that, uh, that we've elected,

00:31:27.880 that we continue to elect there continue is key. Yeah. They're, they're grasp for power and their

00:31:33.920 greed and corruption and just filthy. I don't even know how to describe it. It's just,

00:31:41.820 it's horrendous, horrendous behavior. And I think there are a few who do value, uh,

00:31:48.740 the American way of life who are working to try to reclaim and restore a lot of that. Uh, but

00:31:55.260 it's also indicative of who we are as a society, which is the sad reflection of us. That's exactly

00:32:01.500 what it is. Most people don't care about politics. Most people are greedy and power hungry themselves.

00:32:11.720 Uh, most people would gladly step on others in order to prop themselves up. They'll lie. They'll

00:32:19.380 cheat. They'll steal. Look, we all have the capacity for doing those things, but the idea is that you

00:32:26.440 work against that, right? That you work against the natural man, that you strive to overcome the lesser,

00:32:33.900 weaker, more pathetic version of yourself. Like we were talking about earlier and reveal the person you 0.96

00:32:39.940 have an opportunity to become, but most people aren't about that. They're victims. They like to

00:32:45.660 be victims because they get the attention. They focus on, uh, behaviors and activities and vices

00:32:54.680 that don't serve them and put other people down. And so we get exactly what we deserve, unfortunately,

00:33:00.460 and we're going to reap the benefits of this and the consequences, I should say, not benefits,

00:33:05.200 the consequences of this. And it's a very sad time in, in the country right now. So, you know,

00:33:12.200 rather than focusing on that, like, what do we do to fix it? Everything that I've been talking about

00:33:16.180 for five years, it's, it's ourselves, right? It's ourselves as men. We fix ourselves. We correct

00:33:23.580 our behavior. We start to live by a moral compass. We attempt as best we can to bridge the gap between

00:33:30.500 what we know we should be doing and what we're actually doing. We live with honor and class and

00:33:35.260 integrity. We strive to serve other individuals. Uh, we light ourselves on fire to our reference

00:33:40.400 earlier and allow others to be influenced by what it is we're doing. Uh, and then we demand

00:33:45.880 accountability and excellence from the people that we have chosen to represent us. And if they can't do

00:33:53.700 that, then we oust those individuals and we pick new representatives who are better and, uh, represent

00:34:00.660 representatives of, of who we are and what we believe. Uh, but you can't do that if you're not

00:34:06.020 willing to fix yourself and start working on yourself. I'm actually in the process of writing,

00:34:09.680 uh, the outline and part of my next book, which we'll talk a lot about that and how we restore

00:34:17.600 ourselves, restore honor and class and dignity and respect into society. And then ultimately take

00:34:24.280 charge of our own lives and our families and communities and everybody that we, we want to

00:34:28.200 help. And I think at the root of that is stop lowering our standards, our expectations on things.

00:34:34.940 It's funny how you use the word politics, how often we associate a line is, well, that's just politics.

00:34:41.980 Like that's acceptable, right? Oh, it's just politics or it's just news. It's just marketing.

00:34:47.320 Okay. So it's now okay to be dishonest. Like, no, that's not acceptable. Right. It shouldn't be

00:34:53.580 acceptable in our homes. It shouldn't be acceptable with the circle of men in which we,

00:34:57.580 we rub shoulders with it. Shouldn't it be acceptable in politics? It shouldn't be

00:35:01.320 acceptable in our work. Period. Which means that you're going to need to step up

00:35:05.960 because those who are, aren't doing a good job. So you're going to need to step up.

00:35:10.940 You know, it was interesting. You used the word rot. I was standing on my deck here, uh, just a couple

00:35:15.480 of days ago and all the snow is melted and all that's left is wood that is unfinished, right?

00:35:23.140 There's, there's no, there's no nothing on it at all. It's all been stripped away and worn away from

00:35:27.380 the weather. And on certain ends of the two by sixes that, that make up the deck, it's all rotted

00:35:32.200 where the screws are. Well, how do you fix the deck? Do you just like paint over the rot? So some

00:35:38.980 people actually might, but that's not actually how you do it. Not ideal. Right. You actually take

00:35:44.800 those planks and you rip them out and you destroy them. You burn them, you get rid of them, right?

00:35:51.280 You let them go back to where they came from and then you put new planks in. And then only then do

00:35:58.120 you finish the deck once all the old planks have been fixed and ripped out and new ones have replaced

00:36:03.800 those things. Then do you finish it up? Cause right now we're trying to like finish things.

00:36:08.200 And at it's at our core foundation, the rot is there and it's prevalent. And unless we strip away

00:36:13.080 that rot, no amount of finish is actually going to make this thing any better. It might disguise it.

00:36:17.680 It might mask it for a little while, but if you start looking up close, you know, it's going to be

00:36:21.960 there. And then what happens is somebody's walk, one of my kids is walking on that deck one day.

00:36:26.060 And because I didn't address the rot, it cracks, breaks, they fall through and end up hurting

00:36:29.660 themselves. Like that's what we're experiencing right now. We need to rip away that rot

00:36:33.620 and replace it with something that's good and strong and has integrity.

00:36:37.760 That's, that's, and then we can finish it. Then we can worry about the other little details.

00:36:41.860 And I think as, as I evaluate my life and I'm sure a lot of us just look at how we do things

00:36:47.480 far too often, we're painting that deck far too often. We're shoving it smoke and mirrors,

00:36:53.880 right? We're, we're acting like we have our shit together. We're, you know, doing a half-assed job. 1.00

00:36:59.460 We're not really truly having integrity in regards to how we do things, right?

00:37:03.960 You know, it's, it's the classic, you know, you evaluate the, the typical corporate America

00:37:08.960 and how many productive hours an employee actually works, right?

00:37:12.480 Seldom is at eight hours. Yeah.

00:37:15.060 And that's acceptable, right?

00:37:17.280 We have, we have lowered our standards. Well, and we've looked, look, here's the other thing

00:37:22.420 is we accept that lower standard in others because we aren't willing to call them out because we know

00:37:30.400 we might expose ourselves and we might get called out. Right. And that's the problem. Every look,

00:37:36.340 every successful individual that I know, and I've met some very, very successful individuals over

00:37:41.220 the past five years. One that stands out to me right off the bat is Andy Frisilla. Andy, Andy's grown

00:37:48.440 to be a friend, but even outside of that friendship, he's somebody that holds people to task. Like he

00:37:55.360 holds them to a very, very high standard. That's intimidating to a lot of people, but it's actually

00:38:00.580 good to a lot of other people who want to grow and expand. But when I met Andy, he wasn't roughly

00:38:06.820 four years ago. He wasn't the same individual that he is today. And he knew it. And he knew that he was

00:38:13.240 out of integrity. And when I first met him, we talked a lot about how he's going to improve and

00:38:18.620 get his fitness in check. And like he's, he runs a fitness organization and he's overweight and like

00:38:22.980 it's out of integrity. And he's completely reinvented himself over a period of four years,

00:38:29.420 which gives him the authority and credibility to talk to other people like that.

00:38:33.360 Yeah. You can't talk to people and ask them to do something that you're not doing yourself. You

00:38:38.380 can fool them for a little while, especially if you're good manipulative, you can fool them for

00:38:42.380 a little while, but, but that's not sustainable. If you want to hold people to a high standard,

00:38:47.760 like, let me say it this way. You cannot hold people to a higher standard than you hold yourself

00:38:53.120 to. It's just not possible. So if you want the best out of your children, you better be giving the

00:38:59.360 best. If you want the best out of your wife, you better be giving the best. You want the best out of 1.00

00:39:02.540 your employees and clients and everybody else that you interact with. Just understand it can only go

00:39:07.480 as high as the standard you hold yourself to. Yeah. Yeah. And it's very easy to reflect in our

00:39:13.860 lives and see how that correlates. Well, it's, it's, yes, it's easy to see if you're willing to look at

00:39:22.020 it. Most people aren't willing to look at it. Yeah. Hmm. All right. William, that tips you have for

00:39:29.320 newlywed couple in terms of saving for housing kids and becoming financially stable.

00:39:36.580 Do it. Save one, one little tip I would suggest, cause I'm assuming you're renting right now

00:39:41.500 is let's say, and I'm just going to throw out some arbitrary numbers here. Let's just say your rent

00:39:46.700 is a thousand dollars a month. I know if you're in California, you're like, what, where do I live?

00:39:51.880 A tent out on the, under the highway. Yeah. That's where you do live. If you live in, if you live in

00:39:58.020 Maine, then you're like, oh, that's a nice little place that you got there. Right. So let's just say

00:40:03.960 that that's the number. All right. You guys get it. That's a thousand a month. Now you, now you go look

00:40:09.180 and you say, okay, well, we're going to, we're going to buy a 200 or a 300 or a $400,000 house,

00:40:13.800 whatever. It depends on where you live and your financial situation. And let's say that your mortgage

00:40:18.520 is going to be $1,800. And when I say mortgage, I'm talking about principal, interest, taxes,

00:40:24.260 and insurance, all of it, all of it, not just principal and interest, principal, interest,

00:40:28.640 taxes, insurance, 1800 bucks. Okay. So there's an eight, $800 discrepancy per month. So that means

00:40:35.700 that you need to save in a side fund, $800 every month. It needs to be put into a side fund that you

00:40:42.600 don't access. And I can't tell you how often I've heard people say, oh, well, we can't do that.

00:40:47.200 Well, what the hell makes you think you can buy a house then? You shouldn't buy the house. Yeah.

00:40:52.140 You can't afford the house. Like if you can't afford the difference right now and put it in a

00:40:56.060 separate fund, then you can't afford the house. Don't be a moron. It's not difficult. It's math. 1.00

00:41:02.860 There is no emotion in math. It's numbers. It's little squiggly lines that mean something. And,

00:41:09.760 and, and it's not based on emotion. And yet when we start talking about this little green piece of

00:41:14.140 paper called money, we all get emotional and do some real stupid things. So do a little research. 0.99

00:41:20.220 What are the average price points that you're looking at for your house? Then get on a mortgage

00:41:25.600 calculator. I think bank rate has a good one. I mean, there's just Google it. You'll find one

00:41:30.180 mortgage calculator, 15, 20, 30 year loan. Here's the mortgage principle and interest at an additional

00:41:36.960 20%. That's the taxes and insurance. Okay. It's 1800 bucks. Take the difference from what you're

00:41:41.760 paying now. Set that aside every single month. If you can do that for six, seven months. Okay.

00:41:46.160 You probably can afford that place. If you can't do that at all, then no, you can't afford that

00:41:50.820 place at the moment. So start gain a new skill, get a promotion, take on a new job, work a few more

00:41:58.140 hours, have her go to work, like whatever you can do to start raising your income. I mean, in addition 1.00

00:42:03.660 to that, you're just going to make sure that you're tracking your income and expenses. I guarantee

00:42:07.740 that if you start tracking, you'll, you'll, you'll start to work out a lot more discretionary

00:42:12.360 income than you think you have. Cause you'll realize you're spending an extra two, three,

00:42:15.700 $400 at the convenience store and McDonald's and all these little ticky tacky things that you don't

00:42:20.240 need, but you won't be able to identify that unless you're actually tracking it on a weekly basis,

00:42:26.340 not monthly weekly. Here's my income. Here's my expenses. Here's where it went. Here's where we lost

00:42:32.560 money. Here's what we weren't aware of. And you start to identify that. And now that you're aware of it,

00:42:36.980 you can start saving, investing it and using it in a more prudent manner.

00:42:42.260 Cool. Here's Kig advice for a 20 year old college student. 0.97

00:42:48.480 Get done with school as quickly as you possibly can. Like just, just take it to the extreme. Look,

00:42:53.680 I'm get an extra degree, maybe a few masters, take your time. Just keep rolling that in,

00:42:59.160 deferring your student loans.

00:43:00.620 That's right. I'm, I'm, uh, I'm, we'll say it this way. I'm bearish on college education.

00:43:06.440 All right. If, if you need a college degree, because you need it to pursue the career that

00:43:13.340 you're after, then by all means, go do that. Do it with as little debt as possible. Work a job,

00:43:19.500 get grants, not loans, grants. I understand loans too, but I'm saying if you can get grants first,

00:43:25.060 get a job. Like, I don't want you to come out of school with, with a bunch of debt. Okay. So if you

00:43:29.980 have to do that, you have to do that. I get it. If you're just going because like, it could be fun or

00:43:35.060 maybe it'll be a good experience. I'm not sure what I'm going to do. So I'm just going to get

00:43:37.700 this degree. Yeah. Then get serious. If you don't know what you're going to do, then like,

00:43:41.960 get serious. Hey, this is what I want to do. And then, and only then should you pursue that course

00:43:46.940 of action. The college to me, isn't a place to hang out. And too many people think that,

00:43:52.220 and I'll have people from this podcast. They'll say, well, you know, you build a network and you build

00:43:56.640 discipline and yada, yada, yada, yada. I could do that a thousand other places that are going to be

00:44:01.460 much more effective, effective, much more efficient and much more profitable, frankly,

00:44:05.240 because I'll be working and earning money rather than spending money. College in a lot of ways is a

00:44:11.380 big scam. I'm not saying it isn't necessary. I'm not saying that anybody who went to college is an 0.63

00:44:17.360 idiot. I'm not saying any of that. I'm just saying you better be very, very careful of the 1.00

00:44:22.000 fire that you're playing with because fire can certainly be a benefit and it can burn and destroy

00:44:28.800 along the way. So don't waste your time. Be hyper, hyper, uh, intentional about what it is you're

00:44:36.040 doing. So you're making good decisions, prudent decisions, and you're actually moving the needle

00:44:40.020 rather than just kicking the tires and hanging out. Yeah. I am Danny boy. What do you think about

00:44:46.720 the current state of the world and all these events in relationship to Bible and biblical prophecy?

00:44:51.860 I don't think I'm willing to go there yet. Cause I, I mean, look, I, I don't know. I don't know.

00:45:00.220 I mean, there's, there's biblical prophecy and I don't know if there's something specifically

00:45:03.440 that you're talking about. And there's a bunch of things like, Oh, it's the end of the times and

00:45:06.860 end of the world. And here's all the things that are coming to fruition and coming true. And there's

00:45:10.680 wars and disease and famine and all this other stuff. And that's certainly true. Um, but yeah,

00:45:17.820 I don't know. I think that we, uh, we just need to do right. We need to live right. We need to be

00:45:24.700 healthy. We need to serve ourselves and serve our families and do what we can't elect the right

00:45:30.300 leaders, hold them to task and account, but I'm not quite there yet. As far as this is the end of

00:45:36.040 the world. And frankly, I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. Use it as a good learning experience regardless,

00:45:41.560 right? Well, it doesn't matter if it is or isn't right. It actually doesn't matter. Like the only thing,

00:45:46.680 the only reason it would matter is because you think it's going to be the end of the world is

00:45:50.740 coming, you know, in the 24 hours. And then of course that's going to probably dictate a lot of

00:45:54.740 your life. Like where do you need to repent and what you should do right now anyway. And do you need

00:46:00.700 to delete your, your internet browser kind of thing? You know, like if you're going to die type

00:46:05.820 thing, but, and to your point though, Kip is like, you should be living that life anyways, right? You

00:46:11.220 should be doing the right things anyways. And regardless of what happens, you're prepared. Yeah. Just be

00:46:15.860 prepared to meet your maker or to live another day. Just be prepared. Cause there is no guarantee

00:46:21.760 that you're not going to meet your maker tomorrow anyway. Well, one of those things is going to

00:46:25.280 happen. You're either going to die or you're not. So be prepared. Pretty sure that's what's going to

00:46:30.120 happen. All right. Michael Kropp, uh, for those who are not working or aren't used to working from home

00:46:38.080 and used to have, and, and used to having physical separation, what advice would you give for those

00:46:44.200 staying positive and productive despite the current situations? I always say, make yourself the

00:46:49.240 project. That's what you need to do. Make yourself the project for me. I've gotten a little stir crazy

00:46:54.120 around here at times. Cause I'm not going out and meeting and going to lunch and doing the things

00:46:58.440 that are training jujitsu, like doing the things that are a good outlet for me. Right. Yeah. But I'll

00:47:03.920 tell you what, the house looks awesome because I haven't been sitting around doing a bunch of shit 0.95

00:47:08.960 that doesn't help me or anybody else improve. So we put new flooring in the front patio. Uh, 0.85

00:47:15.800 we put in new blinds in the entire house. We cleaned out the entire attic. I remodeled the

00:47:22.960 entire office. The only thing I have done to do left and you can see it up here is the trim up the top

00:47:28.700 and on the floor, but everything else is completely remodeled. Um, I, I just wrote that document that I

00:47:34.860 shared with you a little bit of earlier. I'm writing that document. I'm, I'm building, uh, an

00:47:39.340 achievement and advancing initiative for the iron council. I decided that I was going to do 75 hard.

00:47:45.060 So I'm working out twice a day now and drinking a bunch more water than I'm used to, which is the

00:47:49.120 hardest part of it is drinking that much water. Uh, so yeah, stay busy, engage your mind, engage your

00:47:57.400 back, engage your hands and get to work. Like there's plenty to do. Just find something to do.

00:48:02.780 Be productive. Don't watch that tiger movie. Like every time you want to sit down and you want to

00:48:08.080 watch it. And I don't even understand what people are talking about. Don't watch it. This tiger

00:48:12.000 something. Right. Don't watch it. I've seen an episode and I'm like, this is stupid. I shouldn't

00:48:18.240 even watch that episode. I feel like I'll never, and I never will get that hour or whatever back of

00:48:22.420 my life. Don't watch it. Like do something, read a book, play the guitar, lift weights, whatever,

00:48:31.680 do something that's way more productive than just sitting around doing enough stuff in your face 0.99

00:48:36.640 full of crap. And there's so much of the stuff that we can do now that we procrastinate and never do 0.98

00:48:41.420 because we don't have time for, or whatever. It's like, well, now's the perfect time.

00:48:46.540 Now's the perfect time to practice the guitar because you know, that wasn't a priority. Well,

00:48:51.940 that's what you don't have jujitsu anymore. So. Right. So do something else. I'm, I've over the past

00:48:56.500 four weeks. I've been so much more productive in my life than I've ever been ever. And everything's

00:49:02.620 improving. My relationships are improving. Of course, the family dynamic is improving the

00:49:07.840 business. I was looking at income and the trajectory it's gone up over the past five

00:49:12.300 weeks and it will continue to go up over the next five weeks. My, my weight is going down. Body fat

00:49:18.020 percentage is going down. Strength is going up. Like, and I don't say this to brag. I'm just saying like,

00:49:21.820 I'm more focused than I've ever been. I don't have to say no to anything anymore. Cause they're just

00:49:27.900 not there. Right. People aren't inviting people to go do things and, and, and help them move. And

00:49:33.240 it's like, I don't have to say no to anything. That's a beautiful thing. Now I can take all that

00:49:36.940 time and commit it towards improving myself and my immediate circle, which frankly is, is my family.

00:49:42.140 That's it. Yeah. It's pretty nice actually. All right. Uh,

00:49:48.900 yeah. You'd rather have names, wouldn't you? I know this is really hard.

00:49:56.400 Although some, some of it's kind of funny, but, uh, what is one thing you wish you would have

00:50:00.540 learned in your twenties? We get this question from time to time. Yeah. And I still don't like it.

00:50:07.860 I mean, what do you feel like you need to learn? Learn that.

00:50:12.680 I don't understand where this question comes from. Like, help me understand the context of this

00:50:17.080 question. I don't think I've ever asked like, Hey, what should I have learned five years ago?

00:50:22.300 Yeah. I don't know. Like Jack, I think it's the hijack. It's the idea that like, Oh wait,

00:50:27.280 if Ryan knowing what he knows now, it looked back at his life and said, I should have learned this.

00:50:33.800 Then if I learned that, then I'll even be like even better off. I mean, there's a thousand things.

00:50:40.360 Like I wish I knew everything. I wish I was God of the universe five years ago. Like that's

00:50:45.760 technically the answer, but you can't know that. Yeah. Look, I'm trying to, I'm trying to be

00:50:50.860 understanding of the question. Like what are a couple of lessons that I think you should know?

00:50:56.120 You know, again, it depends. Like here's, here's one. And I answered this earlier. It's like,

00:51:00.900 ask a better question. Like I wish 10 years ago, I would have learned to ask better questions

00:51:06.940 in a better question is hyper, hyper specific. So if you're like, what do you think I should know?

00:51:14.180 I have no idea. But if you said, Hey, I'm starting a business and I'm trying to grow my email list

00:51:20.620 and I don't have people converting. What's the, what three things should I know?

00:51:27.200 Awesome question. Very specific. You know what you want. You're giving me some instruction on what it

00:51:33.100 is I can do to maybe help you, or maybe I can't. And I have to direct you somewhere else.

00:51:37.340 That's a more powerful question. So what I would say to answer this is one thing I wish I knew

00:51:41.740 five years ago is how to ask powerful questions. And a powerful question means that

00:51:48.900 you have to put some effort into it. Like, like you can't, if you just ask a question like that,

00:51:57.040 you're like passing the buck. A better way is saying, okay, well, like, what do I want to learn?

00:52:02.820 Okay. I want to learn about starting a business or I want to learn about losing weight. I want to learn

00:52:07.160 about nutrition. I want to learn about how to connect with women. Like, what is it specifically

00:52:12.080 that you want? And then you ask that question from people who have those results. And that's where

00:52:17.420 you're going to start to see the results for yourself and get better answers. Because right

00:52:22.460 now, if I just said, Oh, you should, um, you should learn to be a pilot. That's one thing I wish I would

00:52:27.200 have learned five years ago. That may not be what you need to focus on. I don't know.

00:52:30.360 So I'm not trying to beat, beat you up too bad on this. I'm just saying like five years ago,

00:52:36.120 I wish I would have known how to ask better questions that were hyper-focused so that I could

00:52:41.340 get the exact results and answers that I was looking for. It would have been a much more effective way

00:52:47.260 to go about my life. And by the way, any mentor will tell you that if you're, cause a lot of people

00:52:51.520 say, well, like, how do I find a mentor? What are you looking for? Well, I want, okay, good. Now you

00:52:57.320 narrowed it down and you can start looking in the wrong path at the right path.

00:53:01.220 Yeah. Well, and I'll pull a Mickler. Sometimes the things that we wanted to learn when we're 20,

00:53:06.160 we weren't capable of learning. Yeah, that's true. Right. The thing I look at, I, if I think about 20,

00:53:12.300 what I wish would probably be better self-awareness. And some of that has to actually

00:53:18.080 like literally has to do with physical brain development. So who knows how well I could have

00:53:23.580 pulled that off at age 20, probably not very well. Yeah. I agree. I just, I just say,

00:53:29.800 what, what do you want to learn? What do you, what result do you want to produce?

00:53:35.380 That's what you need to learn. Yeah. All right. Flying bluntsman. If anything,

00:53:41.120 what are you working on towards while still in lockdown?

00:53:45.220 I talked a little bit about these. So I'm doing 75 hard. So given that the, the, the try on that,

00:53:52.080 um, doing the achievements and the advancement initiative inside of the iron council, these are

00:53:57.400 different achievements that men will be able to unlock and then advance within their, within the

00:54:01.620 iron council itself. Uh, working on the book suggested that a little earlier, um, obviously

00:54:07.460 kind of revisiting the mission and the purpose of the organization and the order of man. Uh, and I,

00:54:13.640 that will translate over into some changes on the website to make it more user-friendly and,

00:54:18.860 and clean up the clear flow and clear up a message and the process and where guys can go for resources.

00:54:25.120 And then also working on, uh, building out a more comprehensive offering of merchandise in our

00:54:33.560 store. Like you have, you have a order man shirt on an order, a man hat. I have an order man shirt on

00:54:38.780 order man hat. So like, I want to make sure that we have a more comprehensive offering of what's

00:54:42.820 available there. So we've got a new hat coming out here soon too, called the watchman.

00:54:46.740 It's awesome. Watchman. Like it. All right. Uh, Joe Dunham, what are two favorite podcasts you

00:54:53.180 listen to currently when you're not recording your own? Um, Hmm. Let me pull up my, my phone

00:55:00.400 here and I'll tell you, cause there's quite a few of them. Two favorites, two, two favorites. I

00:55:05.220 got to set two. I don't know. Do you want to, do you want to limit it down to two? You're going to,

00:55:09.320 uh, I like, I'll give you two. I like, uh, Ben Shapiro and he's so smart and he is. He's

00:55:21.140 amazing. Uh, London real. Those are the two I'd give you right now. Copy other ones. Should

00:55:27.800 I give some bonuses here though? Or yeah, I guess the bonuses. All right. Art of manliness

00:55:31.680 is good. Um, this one with Dan Crenshaw, hold these truths is, is pretty interesting. Uh,

00:55:41.260 Jordan Harbinger shows good. What else? Got a lot in here. Uh, cleared hot. Andy stump is

00:55:48.420 good. Jordan B Peterson podcast. Yeah. Mike drop really F with Andy for Silla team. Never

00:55:57.040 quit Choco Rogan, et cetera, et cetera. There you go. All right. Tarragus 20. Let's take 0.94

00:56:09.260 a couple more by the way, Kit. Okay. Tarragus 20. Are there any worthwhile order of women 1.00

00:56:14.420 style blogs and sites? I enjoy and appreciate order man philosophy. And I wish that there was

00:56:19.780 a similar supportive community for women regarding true femininity and our roles. Um, I

00:56:27.020 I don't know. I really don't. I get this question quite a bit. This sounds like a woman is asking

00:56:31.220 this question. Yeah. All right. Okay. Um, yeah, I actually get a lot from men because they want

00:56:36.400 to know where they go for their wife. And I don't know. I don't, I don't really know what's

00:56:41.100 out there. Obviously I'm not like immersed in that world. So if you have any suggestions

00:56:45.560 or recommendations, then let me know. Cause people ask the question and I just don't know.

00:56:49.900 And I don't spend time researching it cause it's not, you know, in the wheelhouse of the things

00:56:53.380 that we're doing. So if you have recommendations, let me know. I'm all ears. Cool.

00:56:57.660 Leon Johnson from Texas or dot Texas. Uh, when does the scout make its comeback?

00:57:04.700 Uh, the scout hat. I'm this. Well, Oh no, no, no. Sorry. He's talking about my truck.

00:57:10.240 Yeah. I was like the, the what now is the scout not for selling on the hat anymore?

00:57:14.880 No, it's, it's there. It, we were just out of stock. And so we just restocked two days ago.

00:57:20.000 It's the hat. It's coming back. It's there. If it's a truck, uh, probably within the next week,

00:57:26.200 we'll bust it out. Cause the snow's all gone. Um, it's pretty soggy out in the field right now.

00:57:30.460 So if I took it out of the thing, like I might get swamped in the river that I have to cross in

00:57:36.020 order to get it to where we want it. So probably in the next week or week and a half, I'd say it'll

00:57:41.000 be out. That's funny. I'm rolling around cruising the streets of Maine.

00:57:46.380 All right. Uh, Goldman, how do you feel about your shorter beard?

00:57:51.860 I'm actually thinking about going shorter. Oh, I don't know. I haven't decided. I like,

00:57:56.800 I like the shorter beard better than the longer beard though. Actually it doesn't get in the way.

00:58:00.960 It's easier to maintain. It just looks better. So I don't mind it. All right. Uh, the only DJ David,

00:58:10.420 I have a son doing two months, best advice. Uh, continue to take care of yourself. Like all the

00:58:18.580 other advice you'll get, like, Oh, you know, love him. You'll get all that stuff. But what you won't

00:58:24.440 hear a lot is continue to take care of yourself. And that is where most men fail. Like just the fact

00:58:29.380 that you're asking the question says, you're probably going to be a relatively good dad.

00:58:32.620 You're going to mess some things up because you're a dad. That's what we do, but you're going to get a

00:58:36.120 lot of things right because you're, yeah, you're intentional about it. You, you want to be a good dad.

00:58:40.040 So like changing the diapers and feeding him and being patient and all this other stuff that you

00:58:44.300 can hear from everybody else. You're, you're going to do that by default because you're a dad.

00:58:48.780 But what a lot of men do is they like forsake all their friends. They let go of all their hobbies and

00:58:56.940 their activities, their interests, and they stop taking care of themselves. And it's noble because

00:59:01.960 you're focused now on your kid and your wife and everything else. But if you don't take care of

00:59:06.120 yourself, you're going to burn up and burn out and you're going to produce a less than favorable

00:59:11.580 result. And I'm just telling you, I'm going to be so bold as to say, it's very likely that if you

00:59:16.600 don't take care of yourself, that you're just destined to walk the path of divorce and or single

00:59:23.000 fatherhood. Uh, and I know that sounds like extreme, but I'm telling you if you, and I've seen

00:59:29.060 it time in and time out. If you do not heed my warning of taking care of yourself, that is the path

00:59:33.920 that you're walking. And it's very likely that it'll happen. Would you agree with that? I know

00:59:38.420 that's like almost an alarmist way of looking at it. I'm just telling you that is the path of

00:59:43.860 divorce and single fatherhood. You, you will become the man or a man that your wife doesn't want to be 0.97

00:59:51.980 with and that your son or daughter will not look up to. That's a great way to, that's a, that's a very

00:59:57.380 like grim way to look at it, but it's like the exact right way to look at it.

01:00:04.740 I like that. I'm going to write that down, man. No, that's really good. So you'll be,

01:00:09.280 you're going to become the man your wife doesn't want to be with and the father that your son or 0.90

01:00:14.860 daughter doesn't look up to. Yeah. That's, that's powerful. There it is. There it is.

01:00:22.540 I'm stealing that by Ryan Mickler. To follow Ryan Mickler and to read his new quote,

01:00:32.460 follow him on Twitter and Instagram. And I'm assuming this may happen again. So if you guys

01:00:41.260 want to obviously follow Ryan, stay, get in contact with him and maybe a future submission

01:00:46.960 of questions to the MA that's at Ryan Mickler, M I C H L E R. We talked about this, you know,

01:00:53.800 and a lot of these questions today are just about becoming better, right? How do I become

01:00:57.880 an intentional father for my new son? How do I take advantage of my time of isolation? Well,

01:01:04.640 you get on the court of life and you play the game and you become better and you find men to hold

01:01:10.440 you accountable. That's another topic on today's discussions was accountability and what that looks

01:01:16.200 like. And, and you use the example of Andy Frisilla and holding people accountable is tough. That's

01:01:22.680 one of the things I love about the iron council. It is, it is a playground. If you're a passive

01:01:28.640 individual that doesn't feel comfortable communicating and, and you do not like to be

01:01:33.260 held accountable, join us in iron council and then ask your team to hold you accountable and communicate

01:01:39.600 like you normally don't communicate and speak up when you normally don't speak up.

01:01:44.660 Yeah. Because Kip, I can say one thing on there is like, it is possible to hide out in the iron

01:01:49.660 council. It is.

01:01:51.140 So like we've created this framework, but I've seen a lot of guys like hiding out. Cause there's

01:01:55.660 a lot of guys in there, right? Yeah. Look, we've created the framework, but you've got to do the

01:02:00.680 work. You've got to put forth the effort. So if you have those little butterflies in your stomach

01:02:04.200 about not sharing and not opening up and you're, you don't want anybody to take you to task, then

01:02:08.840 that's probably exactly what you need. So don't let yourself hide and be passive.

01:02:13.440 Totally. And we have this, we have this environment by where you could do that. And what's the

01:02:17.980 consequence? Some dudes online that don't even know you might judge you at least tried it out

01:02:24.960 here. Right. And join us in the iron council and figure it out and learn in this playground. So

01:02:30.000 then that way you can implement those kinds of ways of being in your family at work and in other

01:02:34.820 areas in your community. So join us or learn more at order van.com slash iron council. And of course,

01:02:40.360 you can join us on our Facebook group. That's facebook.com slash group slash order man. And

01:02:47.380 the order of man store is restocked with some items to find out what those items are. Go to

01:02:52.520 store.orderofman.com. That's it, man. Well done. Done. All right, guys. Appreciate you. Glad you're in

01:02:59.360 the battle. Just make sure to connect with us. We've got a lot of good information and some new

01:03:02.660 initiatives coming out, including, you know, the book that we'll, I'll start talking about a little bit

01:03:06.720 more as we get closer, but really glad that you're on the path with us. We need more men in this fight

01:03:11.660 and honored you're in it with us. So we'll let you get going. We'll be back on Friday for the Friday

01:03:16.000 field notes, but until then go out there, take action, become the man you are meant to be. Thank

01:03:20.640 you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your life and be

01:03:25.400 more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.

Order of Man - April 08, 2020

Addressing the Rot in America, Holding Others to High Standards, and the Lies We Tell Ourselves ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

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