00:01:23.440Well, guys, if you don't know what we're doing here, this is obviously an Ask Me Anything where Kip and I are fielding questions from our exclusive brotherhood, the Iron Council.
00:01:32.980By the way, I've got a great topic next month for the Iron Council.
00:01:36.420We're going to be discussing Iron John, the book Iron John that breaks down the story titled Iron John.
00:01:43.620And the discussion is going to be all around what has been dubbed the wild man.
00:01:48.500So it should be pretty cool next month.
00:01:49.720So guys, if you're excited, yeah, dude, it's going to be good.
00:01:52.060How do I sign up? How do I sign up? What's this thing called Iron Council, right?
00:01:54.920Yeah, if you don't know what it is and you want to know more about it and Kip, you want to lock in your spot, then head to orderofman.com slash Iron Council.
00:37:18.320So we really have to understand why they're behaving the way they are.
00:37:22.040And then again, it's our job not to hang on, but to harness it in a way that's going to serve him and other people that he'll at some point have an obligation to serve.
00:37:43.720And so a little bit of that, you know, I'm not saying this is the case, but part of maybe his team not being aggressive is the fact that they haven't been guided to use their aggression either.
00:38:13.020And he turned it on and he pitched a great game yesterday.
00:38:15.500We won the game and all was well, but yeah, it's okay to teach them to push a little harder and to use what maybe a lot of society would dub as toxic or some, somehow some, some trait they shouldn't be harnessing.
00:40:01.260I have teenagers to embrace, embrace pain, discomfort, hard work, and the hard work that it takes to make a positive change or even want positive change and growth.
00:40:11.920I, I really am seeking this question about myself, but I look better if I ask for my kids.
00:40:17.740Well, let's address the real question then instead of the fake one, uh, you, you've got to find something that inspires you, right?
00:40:27.800You don't have to be motivated and inspired the same way I am.
00:40:30.860Like there's no rule that says you need to be inspired by hunting or if you, or if you're inspired by what Kip does with jujitsu, it's like, there's no rule that says that's what a man is inspired by or even what a man does.
00:40:42.900So find something that works for you, something that you're excited about, something that you're passionate about and engaged with, because then I think it's less of an uphill battle.
00:40:52.540But if you're trying to follow around what I'm doing or Kip or any number of people that you could be following and saying, Oh, I'm supposed to do it like that.
00:40:58.720Like I always use the example of Jocko. So Jocko gets up at four 30 and all of the guys think that because he gets up at four 30 and post a picture of his watch that they have to, I don't, I don't think that's right.
00:41:10.160I think if you get up at four 30, because that works for your schedule and that's what inspires you, then, then get after it as Jocko would say.
00:41:17.760But if you wake up at six 30, because that's what works for your dynamic.
00:41:21.020And then you go do the things that you feel are good for you and uplifting and make you stronger in all capacities of life, then, then do that.
00:41:28.100We got to be very, very careful of, of comparing ourselves to other individuals and thinking because they do it a certain way that that's the way that we're supposed to do it.
00:41:35.460And then what it leads to is, Oh, I should do this. I should really do this. And then you never do it.
00:41:42.200And then that leads to guilt and resentment and frustration, which leads to feelings of inadequacy and ultimately lower performance, which perpetuates the cycle.
00:41:54.640So find something that you're inspired by. If you don't like running and you're never going to be a runner, then nobody's saying you have to go run a marathon.
00:42:02.640Maybe jujitsu would be better for you. If you're not into firearms training and you don't like guns.
00:42:09.960Okay. Well then go shoot a bow or something else like, or don't shoot at all.
00:42:15.100Like nobody's saying you have to do this stuff. I'm like the greatest, one of the, one of the greatest challenges I have is when I share things, people think that because I'm sharing it, that I'm saying that this is what a man does.
00:42:27.320Now there are some of those things. Certainly. I'm just sharing what's working for me. And if it works for you too, great. Something else works for you. Great.
00:42:36.220But find something that inspires you that you're excited about and pursue that and be less concerned about what I'm doing or what Kip's doing or what Andy Frisilla is doing or Jocko Willink or Goggins or any number of people.
00:42:48.280Just do you and push as hard as you can with that thing.
00:42:52.820Cool. Joshua Benton from Facebook. What is your best advice for a young man trying to find his place in this world?
00:43:01.420For a young man, I would say, try everything like your job. I don't know. I don't know how young is, is young, but when you're a young man, I think of a young man, probably between like, if I were to categorize that, I'd say between maybe like 15 to 25, I would say is, is a young man.
00:43:19.340What, what should a young man in that age bracket do? He should be consuming as much as he possibly can by way of experiences. If something sounds fascinating, do it. That sounds intriguing, do it. Go out there, learn, experience, go on trips, travel the world, take, take a class that maybe you normally wouldn't take, pick up a new hobby, buy a guitar, buy a bow, go hunting, like do as much as you possibly can.
00:43:43.460Cause what you want to do is you want to just be like cramming stimulus into your, into your being. And then you can start whittling it down from there. Okay. I have all this stimulus. Now, what is interesting to me? What do I want to pursue a little bit deeper? Cause I think once you start getting to like 35 to 45, you, you graduate from apprentice to now you're more of a journeyman, maybe if we're going to use that analogy.
00:44:06.400So now you're proficient in something and you're starting to whittle away what you're good at and pursue one track. That's probably, I would say 25 to maybe 45 ish. And then I think at 45, you, you become somewhat of a master at that thing. And then you have an obligation to turn around. And then, then now you're, you're the, you're the coach, you're the teacher, you're the mentor.
00:44:32.300So now you're turning around and you're helping these other young men get all the stimulus and then find something that's intriguing to them. And then journeyman, and then they become the mentor. This is the cycle of life. So if you're a young man, your stage is apprentice. I'm learning. My job is to learn. So I go out there, I learn everything I can. I'm applying a lot of different things. And then eventually you'll start graduating and changing into this journeyman, which is, I really like this. I'm going to walk this route.
00:45:02.300You just made me feel better about being in my forties.
00:45:07.080Well, cause I'm, I'm, I'm the master. That's why.
00:45:10.380Well, you're not a master just because you're 40. Let me clarify there. Okay. So this is not an age thing. It's about the time you should start getting very, very proficient in something.
00:45:20.380By now, Kip, you should actually be good at something.
00:45:25.020You have five years because once you hit 45, then you just move on to that next stage. And if you've got nothing to share, you're going to be worthless having around.
00:45:35.740All right. Ian Swar. I would like to start my own business, but my experience and skills are in healthcare and therefore not very trans, uh, translatable.
00:45:45.340I'm going to stop you, Kip, right here.
00:45:50.820Well, I actually disagree with him. He's saying that his experience in healthcare doesn't allow him to be translatable to building his own business. Are you kidding? That's an amazing industry.
00:46:00.420I agree. I agree. I think you're right. I think both of us are right. I think it's translatable. And if you feel like you need a new skill, get a new skill.
00:46:08.720Yeah. Like nobody's the barrier to learning something is lower than it's ever been. There's no gatekeeper. There's very little cost in learning something. There's a course, there's a conference, there's a YouTube channel, there's a podcast, there's a book on whatever you feel like you need to learn. Like, just go learn it. Stop. Like the, I was going to stop you when you said, but, cause that's don't, don't do that. That's an excuse. We talked about this, uh, I think a couple of months ago when I said the difference between an excuse and a reason, a reason is legitimate.
00:46:37.880Like, Hey, I don't know how to manage my books. Okay. Well, that's a reason. So I, that has a solution that you got to find a solution for. Right. But an excuse is like, I don't know how to manage my books. So I guess I can't be an entrepreneur. It's like, that sounds silly. It sounds stupid. And yet so many of us do that. Stop it. Knock it off with the excuses. Identify some reasons. I think you should do that. You don't want to go into something blind or ignorant. That's not wise, but figure out what the reasons are. Okay.
00:47:06.900Well, I don't know how to manage my books. I don't know how taxes work. I don't know how to incorporate. All right, good. Learn it. That's simple. That's easy. Let's go learn it and apply it. And to your point, Kip, I think a lot of it probably is translatable for sure.
00:47:19.800Yeah. Yeah. Well, and let's be frank, right? You, you have a, guess what you need to start to have a good business idea. Often you need to, you need to find a gap, a gap in a process, a gap, a problem in which you can provide a solution, right? Healthcare industry. It's not going anywhere. That industry sticking around. What gaps exist?
00:47:43.860Yeah. You work at a point. You're going to be aware of the, the solutions or, you know, what, where there needs to be a solution implemented. You know what the gaps are. You know what the problems are. Figure it out. And guess what? You don't have to even be a healthcare professional address some of those problems. Some of those problems might be hardware. They might be software. They might be around process or something else.
00:48:05.200So I think personally, there's gaps in everything. And, and a lot of entrepreneurs, some of them that have the best success is because they were tied to some industry that allowed them to see issues and gaps in, um, in a process where they could address it. Right. And find it and or suggest a solution.
00:48:25.840Yeah. I think this is the premise behind Malcolm Gladwell's 10,000 hours. And, and I can't remember who he talks about, whether it's jobs or Bill Gates, where they were, they had access to computers before they really became mainstream. And so they were able to put in so many hours because they were in this program at college before they even became mainstream.
00:48:49.500And because they had access to that. And because they had access to that and they were in that field. Well, then you have two of the wealthiest men that have ever existed, right? Because they had access to it in their environment. And then they used it and they got proficient with it and then used it to create something entirely new and something entirely different that we haven't ever seen before.
00:49:08.200I'll give you another example on a smaller scale in my own personal life. When I was a financial planner, this was probably, um, two to maybe two years before I started order of man, I started thinking about how I could speed up the, what you would call a sales process. So taking somebody from prospect to sitting down with me to the first time to becoming a client to investing to et cetera, et cetera. Right.
00:49:36.980The place where it got bottlenecked was moving them from prospect to client. And I'd have to sit down with these individuals for a lot, for a long amount of time and really explain what it is I was doing, why it was important, why they needed to worry about it, why it was a concern of theirs. And I really had to sell these individuals on why I should be that advisor. And I thought, man, this is like, this is not a great use of my time.
00:50:02.860So what I started doing it, and I don't even know how, how I had the idea, but I said, well, what if I could just record this presentation and I could just give it to a prospect and they could listen to it. And if they were intrigued, then we would set up an appointment that would speed up the process for me. And it would be a lot, a lot more cost effective.
00:50:21.260So I recorded this, it must've been 25 minute presentation about what I do and why they should hire me. And then I went to Staples or wherever, and I bought blank CDs and I bought the CD covers and I had got some professional pictures done, had a designer design a CD cover, printed them off right there on labels.
00:50:44.620Like I remember sticking labels on the CDs themselves and I would give them to prospects. And I would say, when you're done with this, will you just hand it to somebody else? I bought a, a cheap, you know, like a $90 microphone. And that's what I did. And it started working. People were coming in. They're like, oh, we really like your philosophy. We listened to your CD. My neighbor gave it to me and we want to work with you. I'm like, whoa, this actually works. Like what else can I do?
00:51:07.800So then I started thinking about podcasting because I was listening to a lot of podcasts at the time. And I thought, well, I'll just, I'll do a podcast. And so I started a podcast on financial planning and I used that same $100 microphone and I just launched it. It was called Wealth Anatomy. It was geared towards helping medical professionals with their financial services. Well, long story short, those two little seemingly insignificant experiments turned into what you guys are listening right now.
00:51:32.680And I had, I never recorded that 20 minute little introductory video where I was putting it on CDs and sticking labels on there and handing it out. I never would be doing this podcast right now. So you might, the CD have a video of you talking. It's just audio. It's audio only. Yeah. So I was going to say, we need to put that online. No, we don't. We don't need to put that online. I can't, I don't even know if I have it probably somewhere.
00:52:00.680Anyways, the point I'm making is that there's probably something you're doing right now that if you continue to pursue would translate very well into something else, but you just have to put in your dues.
00:52:11.540So true. So true. Seth Mathers, five most important takeaways you've learned that someone else could apply in creating their own movement. Like you have the order of man.
00:52:22.460Uh, let me think I'm a fly here. Number one, consistency. You got to be very, very consistent. I see guys to Dominic's question earlier that burnout, they get all hyped up and excited about something. So they do it for a month or two and they're like, Oh, I'm not seeing the results. Well, yeah, you just hadn't given enough time. So number one is consistency. Uh, number two is you got to learn to take a hardline stance. If you can't take a hardline stance on something, if you can't stand for something, then you'll never be able to create a movement because you'll water down your message.
00:52:51.520Okay. So hardline stance, meaning just have a unmovable opinion about something like explain more if you don't mind.
00:53:00.680No, that's that, that could be one. And I wouldn't say unmovable because that, that could be dangerous because you don't, you, you want to, you want to expand your, your capacity for new thinking, right? So you don't want to be immovable necessarily, but a hardline stance might be. So for example, order of man is, I believe that men are protectors, providers, and presiders.
00:53:21.520Like it's going to be very, very difficult to convince me otherwise. Yeah. I believe that biologically and socially we are designed to be that way and to operate that way.
00:53:31.460And my job is to help men step more fully into that role. That's my hardline stance. Another hardline stance is that it's called order of man, not order of women, not order of whoever wants to show up and do this.
00:53:44.180It's order of man. And so if women say, well, can I join the answer is no, not because I want to be exclusionary, but because this is for men, that's who it's for.
00:53:51.460Uh, another hardline stance that I have that a lot of people don't like, and they get after me about is that, uh, women who want to be men are not men.
00:54:02.060So we hear this term like transgender man. Well, that's, that's not a man. That's a woman who has a desire to be a man. And if that's their prerogative, great, that's fine.
00:54:10.740That doesn't make, make me a transphobic or I'm afraid of it, or I don't understand. No, it just means that I don't think they're men. I think biologically you have to be a man. That's the prerequisite for being a man.
00:54:23.500So I have certain things that I'm willing to say and willing to share some of them uncomfortable. Some of them people don't like, but because I'm willing to take that stand, then I'm very appealing to those who actually believe a lot like me.
00:54:37.340And especially, especially in a society that waffles around so much, can't make a stand, has no convictions. They'll say one thing and do something else entirely different. And, and something that is at odds with what they just said 24 hours earlier. It's very, very disingenuous and it's very unattractive. It's disgusting. In fact, that's why politics is so bad.
00:54:59.300Would you, would you add being very specific as part of that hard line stance?
00:55:16.180Yeah. So that would be number three is, is being specific, having a niche, right? If you say that you're going to save everybody and serve everybody by doing everything, then actually you're going to serve nobody because you're doing nothing.
00:55:27.640Yeah. So if you really want to help individuals, then help a select group of individuals. People are afraid to do this because they don't want to narrow it down so much that they whittle away their potential audience. Guys, there's seven and a half billion people on the planet. All you need is a thousand. That's it.
00:55:46.100Yeah. You need a thousand of those seven and a half billion that believe in what you believe. They think like you do. They're looking for the flag bearer of, of whatever it is you stand for. And if you can be that individual, you're set. You are set.
00:55:59.540Now we, we have reached that thousand mark and I will continue to go further. And I'm not talking about just a thousand people listening to your podcast. No, I'm talking about a thousand people who will engage with you in a deep and meaningful and significant way. They'll, they'll, uh, share your stuff. They'll put it out in there in the world. If you have an event or a new hat or whatever, they're going to buy it. Like, that's what I'm talking about. Talking about those who are extremely vested in what you're doing.
00:56:26.020So what do we got? We got consistency. We got hardline stance. We got niche. Uh, you have, the next one is you have to learn to be a great communicator. If you can't be a great communicator, you can't do what I'm doing. That's one of the requirements. That's like the ticket for entry. And I'm not always the best communicator. I certainly haven't always been the best communicator, but I'm learning and I'm intentional about how much I'm improving my capacity for communicating a message very, very clearly.
00:56:56.600Articulating it clearly tapping into people's both reasoning and logic and emotion. And the better I get at communication, the stronger this movement grows. That's number four. And then number five is understand that you, and this kind of ties into line with communication as well, is that you are a marketer first, a marketer first. So I don't talk about this a whole lot, but because this gentleman's asking this question, I want to, is that I, I am a,
00:57:25.920I consider myself a marketer and I consider myself a marketer. And I know a lot of people are like, Oh, I don't want to say that. Cause that's, that's like a bad word. And it has a negative connotation. Fine. Whatever. I am a marketer.
00:57:35.500I market tools, conversations, resources, discussions, products that will help men be more capable as fathers, husbands, business owners, community leaders, et cetera, et cetera.
00:57:51.840I am a marketer of those things. What a lot of people will say is why I help men be better fathers, husbands, business owners, et cetera, et cetera. And they think that that's their job title.
00:58:02.540That is not going to help. That is not going to help you build a movement. It's not you a marketer first of fill in the blank. A shoe salesman is not a shoe salesman. He's a marketer of shoes.
00:58:15.760Somebody who's a baseball player, for example, professional baseball player is not even, yes, that is his, his vocation, but he's to market himself by improving his abilities to be a baseball player. Like you're always a marketer first.
00:58:33.760If you get that right and you approach it that way, then you'll build, be able to build a powerful, powerful movement. That's the five I'd give right off the cuff. Anyways.
00:58:44.680Jeez, that was good. I'd been like a one, two, three.
00:58:50.420I kind of felt like four and five. I cheated maybe a little and combine, you know, communication, marketing. They're a little different, but kind of the same.
00:58:56.880Yeah. Five, do steps one through four, six, create a battle plan, battle plan, battle plan it up.
00:59:04.340Greg Griffiths. How do you treat women right without going into princess territory?