Order of Man - Be a Better Man, Raise Your Sons Right, and Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Body ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

00:00:00.000 when it comes to depression you know you have all this this clinical ideas and thoughts about it

00:00:04.720 therapy and that can work and there's value but the first thing that a man needs to do is get out 0.99

00:00:10.320 of his mind and into his body breath work cold exposure heat exposure box breathing like whatever

00:00:17.040 you can do to get out of your mind and into your body is going to help you be a more integrated

00:00:21.280 person and you're just immediately gonna feel better like if you sat and breathed you would

00:00:26.880 feel better things are gonna slip away like that fog that you're feeling that haze will definitely

00:00:32.160 improve kip what's up man great to see you this friday for our wednesday ask me anything you got

00:00:38.960 any uh good plans coming up this weekend um freaking iron man i have long distance run today a long

00:00:47.200 distance bike and still trying to learn how to swim that's my weekend and the wife is out of town so oh

00:00:54.880 so you got the kids too yeah yeah so that's why you're going for your long run and your long bike

00:01:00.000 ride is because the kids are there you're like i'm out of here when they're there when they're when

00:01:04.960 your wife's there you do the short stuff but when they're when she's not and the kids are there you're

00:01:08.400 like ah this is a good time to go on a long long run yeah i'll see you guys in five hours yeah what's

00:01:14.400 what's the what's the distance this weekend that you're gonna do um probably about just up to about

00:01:20.880 eight miles on the right uh and then the bike uh i want to get up to 35 40 miles on the bike

00:01:28.320 and you'll do that consecutively or you'll do that two to two consecutive days yeah two consecutive

00:01:34.340 days yeah yeah i'm not ready to start combining them the swimming is probably you would think i don't

00:01:40.680 know what the iron man distance is i know there's i don't get iron man there's like seven different

00:01:44.920 types of iron man it's like is it shouldn't there just be one but it isn't so yeah what's the

00:01:49.760 distance that you swim in the actual race itself the iron man itself yeah it's a little over a mile

00:01:55.460 so it's about a mile and a half so i'm doing the i thought it was like two miles is that yeah i'm

00:02:00.720 doing this yeah i'm doing the seven the 70.3 iron man which is like a half iron man so i'm not

00:02:06.740 doing the marathon at the end i'm doing a half marathon i think the bike is 50 something 57 miles

00:02:13.420 versus a century which is 100 and then the the swims um a little over a mile yeah got it so you're

00:02:21.620 taking the easy way out got it i'm just kidding yeah there's i well i've ran marathons i can't

00:02:28.280 imagine running a marathon after riding a bike 100 miles yeah that like i've i've ran a bike max max

00:02:36.700 distance on a bike i've ridden um in a race called lodoja in a single leg was a little over 40 miles

00:02:44.400 and anyone that doesn't bike it's wild it's really really interesting like when you run

00:02:52.460 your body you have really great feedback from your body right you're thirsty you need nutrition it

00:02:57.720 it you just act on your natural tendencies from uh from a calorie and from a nutrition perspective

00:03:06.020 on the bike it's drastically different i had a leg of 40 miles i felt great i felt great i'm like oh

00:03:13.580 i just need some water and i had all this nutrients i was going to take i'm like oh should i eat that

00:03:18.720 i'm like no i don't want to eat that i feel fine and then i got to the end of that leg and my body i'm

00:03:24.960 not joking it sounds really dramatic but my body just stopped working my legs that's dramatic at

00:03:30.780 all yeah they just they just cramped up it felt like i had knives all over my legs and i couldn't

00:03:36.900 get like i was sitting there and it was hurting and i i'm like what is wrong with me and i remember

00:03:42.580 telling my wife i'm like i think i'm out i can't even walk i can't barely sit here and and she's

00:03:49.100 like well did you eat eat and i was like no ate some food 15 minutes later i'm like

00:03:54.880 put me back in coach i feel fine it was fascinating to me it's so interesting because that's like to

00:04:01.820 to tie that into how that might help these guys is like you have yeah sure listen to the feedback but

00:04:07.960 sometimes you're just not going to get feedback in life you know so for example uh in a relationship

00:04:13.400 where you might be struggling with um with connection with your wife she might not be giving

00:04:19.860 you the feedback that you that would help you to be a better husband because maybe there's a wall

00:04:25.140 built up or uh maybe there's some some contention and some resentment and animosity of years of of

00:04:31.380 neglect or abuse or something and and what i think a lot of guys will do is we're constantly seeking

00:04:36.840 for validation on our actions am i doing right am i doing good am i getting acknowledged am i being

00:04:42.000 awarded whether it's a relationship or a business and sometimes most of the time you're just not

00:04:47.860 going to get feedback and you have to still do the right things regardless of the fact that nobody's

00:04:54.380 giving you validation or compliments so i can see how that would be a struggle to still force yourself

00:05:01.940 to hydrate to eat because you don't know if it's working or not totally well and i even relate that

00:05:08.160 to leadership i mean it's really funny it's like as leaders were like oh get feedback from you people

00:05:12.900 you think they're 100% honest with you you own the stick of whether you keep someone employed or not

00:05:21.280 most people are not why would they put that risk they would not risk themselves and so you have to double

00:05:29.420 down in the way you show up to ensure that people are at least willing to maybe give you feedback but

00:05:36.600 to your point you're never going to get the level of feedback that you think you're getting in fact well not only

00:05:41.600 that you'll probably get feedback that's not inaccurate that is not you know completely true

00:05:46.960 absolutely and and you got to be very careful in regards to how you're showing up regardless of

00:05:51.400 that feedback well i had one of our leaders in the iron council tell me because he he works with all of

00:05:57.260 the battle team leader mentors and he he said hey i i asked so and so about um you know how how what did

00:06:05.920 he say like how he's doing or how the team's doing or something and i said did you ask it just like that

00:06:11.540 he's like yeah i said well that's not a great question and and he's like why is that and i said

00:06:17.020 because if you ask somebody like how's it going everybody's just going to say good that's just what

00:06:22.520 they're going to say and so when when when we are trying to solicit feedback from people and they're

00:06:29.320 just giving you really surface level answers platitudes be aware of that because what that

00:06:36.780 could be well it could be a trust issue like you were talking about but it could be a question issue

00:06:42.880 meaning you didn't ask a good question so a better question than saying hey how's everything going

00:06:47.380 is tell me one thing right now that's going really well with your team and then they answer and that's

00:06:55.060 very specific and then the second question is tell me one thing that's not going so well with your

00:07:00.340 team right now now that's two questions but those are so much better questions than how's it going

00:07:07.540 so think about that when you're talking with your people if you're not getting good answers it's likely

00:07:12.060 that you're not asking good questions and or they're not comfortable or safe around you to give you the

00:07:18.560 true honest feedback you might be looking for totally well and i love those two questions because

00:07:24.340 those work perfectly ryan even with personal feedback and so if you and i did an event well

00:07:29.740 let's say we had a speaking engagement you would not say hey how did we do any feedback it's like

00:07:35.600 to your point they're not going to respond to that but you've said what is one thing about the

00:07:40.380 presentation that really benefited you what's one thing that wasn't as valuable or deterred from the

00:07:48.840 effectiveness of the message right people give you those absolutely and that's how you

00:07:54.260 should ask that question yeah yeah i mean as a professional asker of questions i've spent a lot

00:08:00.020 of time thinking like what is and and sometimes you get those hyper those poignant questions like that

00:08:07.340 and then they go and another good question is what else but that type of question only comes after you

00:08:15.340 get the the well running and and then that'll continue to elicit more and more feedback from them so

00:08:21.440 anyways well good man well good luck this weekend with the iron man i was when you were talking about

00:08:25.840 your body giving you feedback uh anytime i go running my body gives me feedback and it basically

00:08:30.240 just says stop doing this we do not like this yeah you're like this sucks you know it's funny 0.82

00:08:37.820 so i i just had a four mile run and a and a four mile bike is all i did this morning

00:08:44.000 my ankle completely hurts right now and i have no idea why like i literally got out of the shower

00:08:50.100 and all of a sudden ah i can't walk on my ankle i'm like dude this sucks like yeah i was hobbling

00:08:58.360 around the other day and my oldest son is like what happened what's what happened what'd you do i'm like

00:09:03.800 i slept yeah and he's like what do you mean i said that's what i did i woke up i woke up and my back

00:09:10.720 hurt so i didn't do any i just i literally slept and i'm hurting so yeah because that's what happens

00:09:16.080 welcome to old age yeah all right man let's get to some questions these guys are probably like what

00:09:20.580 the hell are these guys talking about can they get to some questions here all right so peter 0.53

00:09:25.060 rock rock zoco whoa he's foreign absolutely foreign all right there you go this may be off topic

00:09:34.580 but i'm curious do you know where your family comes from i mean before they came to america your

00:09:40.100 surname sounds german is it german if so do you know which region and when i'm very interested in

00:09:45.920 such family history yeah so i am german um my grandmother and grandfather on my dad's side are

00:09:52.700 german so that's where michler comes from um i also have a lot of scottish heritage as well and then on

00:09:59.240 my mom's side uh french which i'm totally upset about but you know i can't control it i can't go back in 0.91

00:10:05.560 time on that one but no so you know i haven't done much digging so i can't give you a better answer

00:10:12.560 than that i really should um my my great grandfather's name was auto and i have a carl and

00:10:18.440 so yeah we're very german on on my dad's side and i have actually never been to germany but i would like

00:10:25.280 to go and i think before i do that i'll dig in but you know there's there's something deeper here too

00:10:30.280 i do believe that for a man it's good to know where you come from and i'm saying that as somebody

00:10:36.500 who doesn't really know but when you start to figure out who your ancestors were and what they

00:10:41.840 did for work and how they showed up and you know what they accomplished i think about well so i don't

00:10:48.740 know if you can see these cans right here can you see these yeah yeah they're a little they're blurred

00:10:53.860 but they're yeah but i can see two cans on the right hand side of the axe yeah so i have a a great

00:11:00.020 i think he's a great great uncle who uh in san francisco as far as i understand and my mom helped

00:11:07.980 me see this he was a extremely extremely successful business owner and he owned a uh they they made beer

00:11:15.560 so this is wheel and beer right here and those are cans from when the factory was in place and i have

00:11:21.360 pictures of their facility and it's this big beautiful brick building unlike they make them

00:11:26.300 anymore today and his industriousness and um you know what he created from nothing just his mind and

00:11:33.640 his thoughts and ideas inspires me you know and i don't know who it is um i i don't know much about

00:11:39.860 him other than some of that history but it's pretty cool and it ties you to something and i think gives

00:11:45.020 you a little bit of uh inspiration and motivation that you come from a line of incredible people and

00:11:54.100 you should carry on that tradition and try to be an incredible person for your legacy as well

00:11:58.280 yeah and honor their sacrifice right so many of us especially in america

00:12:03.180 um we might have we might have ancestors that sacrificed huge right for us to be uh born and

00:12:11.760 raised in in this wonderful country this is super fun so my great great grandfather um from denmark

00:12:19.580 um his dad's name was soren okay right and on the danish side that's where the last name sorenson

00:12:26.780 comes from is son of soren soren soren son right yeah and so sounds way cooler than sorenson by the way

00:12:37.340 yeah you should just maybe we'll switch it up yeah you should you should be like i'm a kid son of soren

00:12:42.540 son of soren yeah yeah but that's that's what it was saying right that's that's what you're saying

00:12:47.800 in your last name is you're the son of soren um so my great great grandfather came from denmark

00:12:53.700 settled in uh central utah in a cat in a town called elsinore now what's the fun part is else

00:13:01.340 before it was called elsinore it was called little denmark yeah there's a that's a that's a there's a lot of

00:13:07.180 sorenson's and what's the other name um peterson's johnson jorgensen jorgensen's yep yes yes i knew

00:13:15.980 that actually yeah but keep going in the state of utah you if if we had phone books still the so there's

00:13:21.660 tons of sorenson's in the state of utah here's the cool part so i went to copenhagen i went to

00:13:28.400 denmark with the family this is probably about five six years ago if i remember correctly

00:13:32.780 and outside of copenhagen is this town called elsinore which i didn't know that and it was an

00:13:40.100 accident that we ran like we're driving and i see the sign elsinore it's you know spelled slightly

00:13:45.140 different i was like no way that's wild to me but um super cool super cool i i love i love this kind of

00:13:52.020 stuff and and like you i don't i probably don't invest as much time as i should in regards to

00:13:58.200 understanding my ancestry but when i do it i don't know it fires me up it makes me proud yeah

00:14:04.540 and makes me want to show up better i do know on my mom's side they came from france and and they

00:14:11.220 uh settled in canada and eventually made their way down from canada and settled in um this is my

00:14:18.260 my maternal grandmother settled her and her family settled in oklahoma so we've got roots in oklahoma

00:14:24.400 from canada by way of france it's pretty interesting to see how people migrate and like you said

00:14:29.360 you know if if i wanted to move to the united if i lived in france and wanted to move to the united

00:14:35.040 states i i could do that you know pretty easily but 100 200 500 years ago i mean we're talking about

00:14:42.600 traversing the sea with a higher greater degree of of potentially dying on the trip and losing kids and

00:14:49.940 losing limbs and and getting sick and uh you know attack uh running across warring tribes and and all

00:14:58.240 sorts of hostile foreign hostility like it's so wild to think about how much easier life is that's 0.82

00:15:04.780 what's always interesting to me when when people have this romanticized version probably because the

00:15:09.020 movies of you know i i was born in the wrong era i i should have been born in in during the roman

00:15:14.580 empire or like these these ideas that people have i'm like i don't i don't think you have an accurate

00:15:21.080 representation of how horrible it would be knowing what you know now and how soft we have it going to

00:15:29.380 where where they don't have the same technology and creature comforts and modern devices and medical

00:15:38.340 advancements it's not as glamorous as i think people make it out to be totally you know what comes to

00:15:44.040 mine is like things like trauma and anxiety and depression it's like no one had it back then why

00:15:49.880 because they were just trying to stay alive yeah right just staying alive was like on maslow's

00:15:56.820 hierarchy of needs they're just at the bottom right right and just trying to survive which is just wild

00:16:03.340 yeah all right um david uh superco as you grow into a better christian husband father how do you guide

00:16:13.040 your sons that you have been letting slide with behavior and ambitions that are less than your

00:16:19.600 standards older son uh older son 12 daughter nine youngest son is six if needed for reference

00:16:27.500 yeah i i mean first good on you for catching it because a lot of people just don't catch it and they

00:16:34.080 just go with the flow and they do what they've always done and so it can be difficult and anytime you

00:16:40.180 create change in somebody's situation they're going to rail against it you know they're going to

00:16:45.060 question it they're going to be upset they're going to be bothered they're going to be frustrated

00:16:48.520 and so you're going to have some contentious moments as you're trying to enforce a new standard

00:16:52.520 but i think the first step is to sit down with your children and your wife and and not just in

00:16:58.760 one conversation but in multiple conversations that takes place at the dinner table and maybe it's

00:17:04.520 evening meeting or a morning meeting before you start or maybe sunday is family day but whatever

00:17:09.400 it is you're going to sit down and you're going to start talking about what the standard actually is

00:17:14.040 so i would get on the same page if you're married get on the same page with your wife and say hey hon

00:17:18.260 this is what i'm thinking about doing and here's why i think it's important what do you think about it

00:17:21.700 and i and i think probably for the most part she'll be on board and you start talking about standards

00:17:27.420 whether it's screen time or video game time or how you're to be spoken to or your schedule or

00:17:33.620 getting homework done or making sure chores are done every saturday morning like whatever your

00:17:38.020 standard is you and your wife come up with a list of things and and you get on the same page about

00:17:43.180 what that looks like because what you don't want to have happen is for you to start enforcing standard

00:17:48.100 on your kids and your wife's like wait wait what what are we doing i'm not doing i never signed up for

00:17:54.020 that i like this and and now all of a sudden you have the parents who are at odds with each other

00:17:58.840 and even when parents aren't at odds with each other kids are still really good at splitting and

00:18:04.100 fracturing a relationship like that they will manipulate it and they will exploit vulnerabilities

00:18:10.820 in the relationship to their advantage i don't think they're evil little monsters necessarily but it's

00:18:16.020 just human nature so you guys have to be synced up on that and then once you come up with those

00:18:20.100 standards then i would get the kids involved what was it 12 9 and 6 what were the ages

00:18:27.260 um yeah 12 uh 12 and 9 and and 6 yep 12 9 and 6 so um they're old enough that they can actually be

00:18:37.100 involved in the process so let them i would actually involve them in the process before i started telling

00:18:43.540 them what the standard was because i i'd be willing to bet that if you have some real good conversations

00:18:49.540 around why it's important we show up as a family and why standards are important and how we've been

00:18:53.600 letting them slip through the cracks and you ask them what do you guys think about these things i i would

00:19:00.480 be willing to bet that they actually come up with a lot of the same or similar ideas that you and your

00:19:06.760 wife have but here's the difference and this one comes from your playbook kip if they say it they own

00:19:12.700 it if you say it there's less ownership in that you'll get compliance because you can

00:19:18.180 restrict them you can take away video games you can ground that you can do all the things so they'll

00:19:22.720 they'll comply but they won't be bought in but if they come up with the ideas they will and then from

00:19:28.540 there it's enforcement and that's the hard part you have to enforce and the hardest thing about

00:19:34.680 enforcement for parents is not that your kids are going to be bothered by it it's that you are going to

00:19:41.500 have to sacrifice as a father you're going to have to put more time in you're going to have to have

00:19:45.800 conversations you don't want to have you're going to have to sacrifice some of your own personal

00:19:50.820 hobbies and things because that's just what it takes so prepare brace yourself for it what advice

00:19:59.220 or what additional thoughts do you have for david in the event that it's not so much standards for the

00:20:03.800 kids but he's coming to the realization that he has let his standards slip oh did i misunderstand that

00:20:10.420 he's well i don't i i think so maybe a little bit but i think both are highly valuable but he's letting

00:20:16.540 his standards slip and he needs to step back into living by those standards yeah that that actually i

00:20:23.660 think i won't say easier but it's pretty simple um again figure out what your standards are so it's the

00:20:30.100 same process figure out what your standards are and then you have to communicate with the people

00:20:36.280 who will be impacted by new decisions that you're making so easy example maybe you're not as fit as

00:20:43.820 you once were your wife will definitely appreciate you being more fit because you're going to be more

00:20:48.320 attractive and have more energy and sex drive and libido and she's going to be attracted that way so 0.81

00:20:53.420 she's going to appreciate it your kids are going to appreciate it because you'll have more energy and

00:20:57.420 you'll be able to play with them more you won't be as irritable and there's just a lot more benefit to

00:21:02.800 that but still if you're going to start getting up and going to the gym at 5 a.m every morning that

00:21:09.280 might not work for her schedule for whatever maybe that's her gym time or if you're going to start 0.99

00:21:15.260 eating cleaner but she's used to making a certain kind of food and and now you're like nope i don't eat

00:21:22.440 that like she's going to be confused and frustrated by that so when you start coming up with these

00:21:28.080 standards it's really important to tell your wife hey babe like i'm i'm gonna get into shape i'm gonna

00:21:32.560 clean up my diet i'm gonna work out and then coordinate with her what's the best time for me

00:21:38.160 to work out with your schedule i'm not asking you for permission i'm trying to coordinate with you

00:21:42.120 when it comes to food can we you know if she makes the dinners and the meals it's like can we 0.99

00:21:46.740 shift gears a little bit and go towards this as i'm trying to be on this journey um and same thing

00:21:52.760 with the kids let them know hey you're gonna see changes in dad and um i want you to be aware of

00:21:57.080 that and be prepared for that because uh i want to be here and i want to be available to you guys

00:22:01.240 get them involved in the process um and explain why it's important but here's the key here's the key

00:22:08.760 and not at not very many people do this if you start talking with the people in your life about

00:22:16.680 the things that you're going to do then you have to do it otherwise not only are you lazy you're also

00:22:23.540 now a liar and you undermine your credibility and trust with them so if you tell your wife hey babe 0.65

00:22:29.320 i'm gonna start going to the gym and i want to eat better and you keep eating like a garbage disposal

00:22:34.080 and you miss the gym 70 of the time she's gonna think less of you than she did before so be aware

00:22:40.080 of that yeah and then next time you're like oh i'm gonna get my fitness in shape she's gonna go 1.00

00:22:44.480 yeah whatever you've done this before right and confidence is lost yeah well this is why so many

00:22:51.140 guys and i hear this all the time guys will say oh ryan i want to start this business but my wife 1.00

00:22:55.600 doesn't believe in me yeah why should she you know how many businesses have you wanted to start 0.96

00:23:02.080 how many times have you talked about doing this how many times have you expressed interest in doing

00:23:06.940 an iron man or starting a business or being more kind or getting in shape zero you know and it's like

00:23:12.640 yeah zero but the more the more that you do this and then don't actually follow through like why would

00:23:21.760 you expect her to believe you what right do you think that you have to her allegiance just because

00:23:27.000 you said you're going to do another thing that you haven't done in the past yeah props david for

00:23:33.760 recognizing where you're at and also i think you see the importance of letting your kids know

00:23:41.680 hey i'm not living up to the standards i should be and i'm going to do something about it and if

00:23:47.940 you're a man of your word and you're you're a man of integrity and you follow up on your actions

00:23:51.940 dude it's inspirational right because you just taught your boys you're teaching your kids and

00:23:58.600 your daughter that hey standards are important and we're not living by them we pivot and we adjust and

00:24:05.680 and they're seeing that being modeled through you which makes now gives them possibility and

00:24:10.880 opportunity to see that for themselves super powerful stuff um i don't think we realize how

00:24:18.640 impactful our actions are on our kids um and so props to you david for for stepping up right and

00:24:25.300 wanting to be a better version of yourself well and you know there's one other thing that i want to say

00:24:29.880 and um sometimes we believe that if we don't bring things to attention that people won't notice

00:24:39.340 right so maybe your health has slipped or maybe you're not doing as well mentally or emotionally as

00:24:46.880 you have in the past and you don't want to bring it up because you don't want to rock the boat you

00:24:51.520 don't want to make it weird or you don't want confrontation or so you just you bury it and what

00:24:55.920 you think is well nobody knows right even subconsciously you act as if nobody knows no your

00:25:00.360 your wife knows you're not in shape your kids know you're more irritable than you've been in the past

00:25:05.800 so we we shouldn't bury that we should actually hide it yeah yeah it's better just to say hey guys

00:25:13.640 like i have not been showing up and you know what they're gonna at least say in their mind yeah dad we

00:25:18.920 know we know they may not vocalize you know now well and that's but that's the key so yeah what's

00:25:27.420 interesting is that women will often say i did a podcast last week called the five lies that women

00:25:34.380 tell men and one of them was i want a nice guy but complementary to that is women will say i want a 1.00

00:25:41.380 guy who's vulnerable i want a guy who's in touch with his feelings and that's a lie that's not actually

00:25:46.120 what you want i don't think it's deceitful or malicious but it's not true because the minute that

00:25:52.420 a guy does that she gets the ick and she's less attracted but what i do think and i learned this

00:25:59.600 from connor beaton with man talks he's got so much great information and he said you know ryan when a

00:26:03.500 woman says that she's not actually she doesn't actually want you to spill all your baggage and 1.00

00:26:10.720 bullcrap under her she just wants to know that you acknowledge it she doesn't want your weak men 1.00

00:26:19.140 she wants to know that you are aware of your inefficiencies and your inadequacies and this has

00:26:26.100 to have to have to happen as well that you're willing to do something about it so if you come

00:26:31.980 to your wife and you're like babe i had a hard day and life's hard and people are mean to me and my

00:26:36.380 boss yelled at me and my client fired me and all this kind of stuff she's like oh what a loser 1.00

00:26:42.900 that's what she's gonna think now it might not be that harsh and drastic and dramatic but she's

00:26:50.000 gonna think less of you but if you go to her and say babe listen this has been one hell of a week

00:26:59.560 at work boss is upset because we missed the deadline clients upset because we missed the deadline and i am

00:27:06.980 just stressed so if i'm irritable or short with you or distracted that's where it's coming from but

00:27:12.280 again second part here's what i'm gonna do about it i know i'm stressed i know i've been frustrated

00:27:20.560 and irritable lately and and i acknowledge that and you know what i'm gonna do i'm gonna kick tail

00:27:26.800 at work this week i'm gonna get back on top of it we're making a bunch of sales calls

00:27:30.480 and we we're back on track with the schedule to get this to the client and things are easing up a

00:27:35.940 little bit and i wanted to apologize and tell you that i'm working on fixing the problem

00:27:40.900 now she doesn't get the ick she's like oh my gosh what a man like that that's a man

00:27:47.080 a guy who can acknowledge his inadequacies do something or come up with a plan and then do

00:27:53.700 something about it that's what she means when she says vulnerability she wants you to acknowledge

00:27:59.560 what is wrong in you yeah yeah i love it man all right derek pitts i'm a god-fearing man and i have

00:28:08.440 a family of five my oldest is 12 years old boy and i wanted to start opening up this shield with him

00:28:14.940 and start exposing him to the world in a controlled environment so movies have kind of been my go-to way

00:28:21.720 following up with another movie that is a little bit more on a moral level um this is a long question

00:28:28.660 so i'll paraphrase the the net the rest of it his wife is kind of like all in she's just like let 1.00

00:28:34.400 him pick whatever movie and he's kind of like no i i kind of want to ease him into the world right

00:28:41.700 um as a controlled environment so recommendations that we have i you answer the question but i'm

00:28:49.100 interested also in your thoughts right why movies you think because i don't i don't know why i just

00:28:54.600 don't think movies when i think of ways to control an environment to teach my kids lessons

00:29:00.340 most of the time i think about movies and i go yeah that's a false narrative or that's

00:29:05.480 glamorized or you know what i mean i don't know if movies are a good a good choice but yeah i i think

00:29:12.800 in some way you're outsourcing responsibility for those lessons those are lessons that you should be

00:29:20.600 teaching and look movies are great i love good movies you know you're motivated you're excited

00:29:25.140 it's aspirational if you see somebody like william wallace or maximus and gladiator i mean those are

00:29:31.640 the two movies that come to mind because that's the type of movie i like in the genre um so i don't

00:29:38.220 think there's anything wrong with that necessarily and and as far as recommendations i mean you you know

00:29:43.220 break like braveheart saving private ryan uh man that might be a little gruesome for a 12 year old

00:29:47.620 i don't know uh gladiator you know there's there's so many good inspirational manly movies that they

00:29:53.940 can watch and and that's easy but i think create experiences i'm with you kip like create the

00:30:00.280 experience you know how do you teach grit and resilience you guys go do workouts together every

00:30:05.360 morning that's going to teach them how to be tougher than anything else go like when you guys when

00:30:11.120 you go hang out with your boys maybe you go on a camp out or a hunting trip and invite him kip you've

00:30:16.660 been on a number of hunts with me now my kids come with my boys they come with me because i want them

00:30:23.340 to be around you and rick and you know seth and all the other guys that we spend time with i want them

00:30:29.680 to be around those guys because that's going to create real meaningful um change i'll give you an

00:30:36.480 example there's a gentleman by the name of zach evanish and he is in jersey he's a strength and

00:30:43.920 fitness coach i think he's also a wrestling coach phenomenal guy and when my son brecken was young

00:30:49.780 he was probably 12 or 13 zach came out to my place in in maine and brecken really respected and admired

00:31:01.380 the guy and we did a workout together and zach i actually give zach a lot of the credit for getting

00:31:08.240 my son into being fit and being healthy and then over the course of three to four years

00:31:13.440 man he got tall he got lean he got strong he got into more sports he eventually went on to compete

00:31:19.820 as an eighth grader in the high school national power lifting championship in in south carolina and

00:31:25.700 did really really well out there and and that's sure i supported it but it was it was zach who got him

00:31:34.300 fired up and sometimes i think is fathers we that's a little bit of a blow to our ego there's another

00:31:43.680 guy um that that has helped him as well like there's just so many people that have helped him

00:31:48.780 along the way and at first he would talk about these guys and i'm like well what's so great about

00:31:54.700 them you know like that was my mentality and then later i was like no why am i undermining the men that

00:32:00.060 he looks up to who are who are who are helping him who are guiding him who are instructing and leading

00:32:04.320 him and i let other men step into those roles and backed out you know he brecken's got a great

00:32:10.160 relationship with rick trimmer rick is incredibly successful when it comes to business i want my son

00:32:15.520 to learn from him you know i want my son to learn from guys who who lift and train and the more you can

00:32:21.980 get them around good men and if you by the way if you're not around good men then you can't get your

00:32:26.060 son around good men so you got to figure that part out yourself but i would create more experiences

00:32:30.940 than i would worry so much about the the movies the movies are just a support to the lessons that

00:32:35.100 you should be teaching in real real world scenarios totally well and derek you know this and you kind

00:32:41.000 of alluded this in the in the post it's like there's a bunch of garbage in there with it right

00:32:44.940 like maybe i want my kid to watch this movie it's really great movie but there's like this

00:32:49.080 inappropriate way by which this guy you know treats women it's like now i gotta like here let me prop

00:32:55.480 up this character oh look at this guy overcoming stuff oh he has bad morals though don't don't

00:33:00.420 don't attach to that part of this character son it's like you're gonna get garbage right and i was

00:33:06.720 even thinking about this it's like what's more beneficial you know we expose our kids to the

00:33:11.920 movie rudy like i love rudy rudy's a great movie like that's on the list of like your kids should

00:33:16.660 watch that absolutely of course sandlot's on there too but i don't know if there's any moral lessons

00:33:21.040 in sandlot other than it's enjoyable but so we have them watch rudy and what's more beneficial

00:33:28.800 this hypothetical this kid is notre dame football finally gets some playing time and my son's like

00:33:36.420 inspired but how how does he what's the distance between his circumstance and rudy's and how he can

00:33:44.120 relate but him and i doing hard work in the backyard and delaying gratification because

00:33:52.600 we're shoveling dirt is probably a better lesson and more tangible for him to learn from than an

00:34:01.160 inspiring movie that people have a hard time because we put people on pedestals and then we

00:34:05.540 are like we're so distant or so much different than them that we don't see how it relates to us

00:34:10.020 right yeah and ryan you you taught me this over the years man you look for lessons to teach your

00:34:14.780 kids all the time a little nuance hey dad that guy was weird why do you feel that way what's your

00:34:21.420 internal thought process should we judge people right like it's all in these little moments that

00:34:26.080 we teach them i don't think it's so much in front of a screen and the problem with the screen is you're

00:34:31.160 going to get a lot of garbage with maybe some good lessons yeah you know so when you said that about

00:34:38.880 teaching your kids lessons along the way i actually had a really funny experience the other day i was

00:34:43.460 with my youngest son and um i was going to be going on a date a day or two later with with a woman and

00:34:49.780 um yes with clearly a woman i don't know why i need to qualify it with

00:34:53.680 maybe with a woman i just want to be clear she's a woman a cis cis woman um anyways i had to reserve

00:35:05.080 some i had to reserve something so i was on the phone i'm like hey but i gotta take care of this

00:35:09.960 real quick and i i got the thing reserved and my my youngest he's like oh what's that for i'm like

00:35:16.380 oh i'm going on a date and he's like dad she's gonna have a really good time and i was like yeah

00:35:22.860 she is gonna have a good time and it's my job to make sure that she does and it's important that we

00:35:27.780 show up powerfully and it's important that we're prepared and it's important that we invest in people

00:35:31.960 we care about like i explained that to him in real time and he's like oh i got it that makes sense this

00:35:37.800 is a nine-year-old you know and so i had another experience we talked about on our ask me anything

00:35:43.060 where um i took my oldest brecken into the bow shop and the guy was a total jerk you remember me 0.55

00:35:50.720 telling you about that kip yes yes i do remember the guy was a total jerk and i ended up leaving 0.92

00:35:56.800 and as i was leaving brecken was with me he's probably 13 or 14 at the time and i said how do

00:36:02.780 you how'd that make you feel he's like that felt bad i said yeah it felt kind of horrible didn't he's

00:36:09.920 like what are you gonna do about it i'm like it's his business he can refuse the right how would you

00:36:13.780 handle that and he's like well i would just leave i said yeah that's why we're leaving and what do you

00:36:18.840 think's going on with him and brecken's like i don't know maybe he's kind of a jerk i'm like yeah he 0.72

00:36:24.760 was a jerk but is he a jerk i don't know maybe he had a bad day maybe his wife just died or got 0.94

00:36:31.500 diagnosed with i don't know how do i know and so not only teaching consequences for behavior in that

00:36:38.680 situation which is i won't do business with you and i won't send people to to your establishment

00:36:42.460 but also is there some grace or nuance that we can be aware of is there a different narrative that

00:36:47.980 we can craft that wouldn't paint somebody as a villain just because you know they they were upset with

00:36:53.680 you um these are conversations that you can be having every day all day and you should you should

00:36:58.200 be having those conversations don't assume that your kids connect the dots because they don't they're

00:37:03.060 12 or nine or six um i actually picked up a um all right i i got a i've got a good list of movies

00:37:10.920 that i that i pulled up that might be good for a 12 year old boy um so number one is uh and i just

00:37:18.620 did this in chat gpt so some i agree with and some i don't but number one sandlot which you said

00:37:22.880 i would agree with that um karate kid classic that's a good one the original karate kid yeah

00:37:29.360 the original yeah um rocky it says lord of the rings on here i mean if that's your thing i don't

00:37:36.340 like lord of the rings but if that's your thing then there's some there's some lessons to be learned

00:37:39.780 12 that's kind of dark like kind of scary yeah i made the mistake of letting my kids watch that

00:37:45.700 when they're younger and everyone's having nightmares oh yeah i do that all the time with my

00:37:50.580 nine-year-old i'm like oh i shouldn't let them watch the vampire movie or whatever

00:37:54.100 um i'm just sabotaging the other this one i didn't think about but it makes sense the princess bride

00:38:00.360 it's hilarious it's funny but it's got a lot of lessons about commitment and bravery in it so that's

00:38:06.580 a good one yeah that is a good this one this one is i man this is definitely on my top top 10 maybe top

00:38:14.760 five remember the titans that is a great movie yes yeah in fact i literally just added that to a

00:38:21.320 playlist to watch with my son literally like three days ago i was like oh we got to watch this this

00:38:26.060 is such a movie yeah um there's a couple of others like i don't know spider-man and some of the stuff

00:38:31.980 i agree with but um there's five or six that i would go with lion lion king lion king's good man

00:38:38.940 that's that's a classic there's a lot of lessons in there about legacy and showing up powerfully and

00:38:44.640 stepping into the role that you're made for that's actually a really cool movie too yeah yeah that's

00:38:50.520 good list we did good yeah i don't know about spider-man the other ones i i agree with yeah it's

00:38:54.520 spider-man into the spider-verse and then holes holes is funny but i'm not sure that it like really

00:39:01.380 is like on a list that a young man should watch necessarily what's going on with shia labouf or

00:39:06.860 labouf man that guy is did i saw a video of him the other day and he was like outside of a bar drunk

00:39:14.060 and trying to fight people that guy's had such a rough go he got sober and he did this really cool

00:39:21.400 uh podcast with john bergenthal i think his name yeah the real ones real ones episode so yeah so it was

00:39:29.380 so good with him and i think he's like relapsed and man i don't know i feel i i don't know him

00:39:36.640 and it's easy to just like throw stones but i feel bad for that dude like he has gone through some

00:39:42.900 shit it doesn't excuse the behavior but man i have some empathy for that for sure yeah well and i love

00:39:49.420 his his level of rawness right on that podcast and so good you know he's bright oh yeah his mind is

00:39:59.140 brilliant you know what i mean but it just proves like how often ryan have you seen in life where you

00:40:05.240 see someone and you go their number one struggle is them is themselves like how unfortunate that is

00:40:14.800 that we are probably the biggest roadblock in our lives it's not circumstances it's not other people

00:40:21.740 it's our own doing and you know you hate to see people that are just capable of so much and they're

00:40:28.000 getting in their own way you know yeah it's it's actually pretty tragic you know when you see

00:40:34.260 somebody really struggle again it doesn't excuse two things can exist you can have consequences for

00:40:40.840 your actions and not excuse the behavior but also have just a level of humanity and empathy for a guy who

00:40:47.500 is going through some real dark things i don't want to see people go through that

00:40:52.600 yeah totally all right got one more question for us from josh leonard a little bit of a long one but

00:40:59.620 the the the full uh question here makes you know i think we need all of it for context he says i started

00:41:06.040 working in alaska last year for my brother's construction company um and this was in last may

00:41:12.040 about october i started showing signs of depression not knowing at the time between that time and when i came

00:41:19.160 home for winter which was thanksgiving our communication suffered he's talking about his

00:41:23.580 marriage and our long distance intimacy dropped completely off i've been home three months now

00:41:29.560 and we've been intimate three times up until last week i never realized the distance and the lack of

00:41:35.040 communication and the depression was as bad as it was i leave in a week to go back to alaska to work

00:41:41.640 and she is beyond pissed saying i haven't let her down saying i haven't let her down emotionally but

00:41:48.180 physically and she says she doesn't know how she wants to feel about this my question should i even

00:41:54.880 try to do anything before i leave and continue being there emotionally as much as i can or no

00:42:01.200 so i just want to paraphrase to make sure i got it right so he's been working in alaska he came home

00:42:09.680 he had he's he's been experiencing depression since october um came home has been home for three months

00:42:17.000 not real intimate sounds like she wants to be more physically intimate than he does and that's probably

00:42:22.560 a symptom of his depression and then he's leaving in a week and she's mad that he wasn't physically

00:42:31.200 present for her in the time that he was there am i understanding that correctly yep that's what i read as

00:42:37.460 well okay and then should i try to do it the last i got a little confused on the last part should i try

00:42:43.700 to do anything emotionally read that part to me again yeah my question is should i even try i mean

00:42:51.120 it's kind of a silly question in my opinion sorry josh my question is should i even try to do anything

00:42:56.540 before i leave and continue being there emotionally as much as i can or no do like doing anything before

00:43:04.060 i leave what like having sex or like how like i don't know like yes you i mean you should do

00:43:10.220 something yeah like she's not happy so yeah the answer is do something yeah do something um you got

00:43:17.020 to fix your shit man and and i'm saying that with out of love like i'm not i'm not being a jerk but 0.93

00:43:22.720 you you've got some issues that you've got to work through and there's a lot of ways that you can do

00:43:28.340 that but i would definitely involve her in the process and say hey babe look i i know that the 1.00

00:43:34.200 last three months has been hard on you and it's been hard on me too and i'm struggling i'm suffering

00:43:41.200 again this is the vulnerability conversation we're having so if you just leave it there

00:43:45.300 it's not real positive or constructive but what i would say is hey babe i'm struggling and suffering and

00:43:52.140 what i'm gonna do for the for the week that i'm home here is i'm going to um talk with a therapist

00:44:01.400 i'm gonna um build some friendships i'm gonna get it get a hobby uh i'm gonna start working out and

00:44:12.700 eating better i'm gonna work on my sleep schedule i'm actually also i've got an appointment with the

00:44:18.680 doctor to get my blood levels tested my hormone to see where my hormones are at see if things are

00:44:23.940 out of whack there and i just want you to know that the relationship that we have is so important

00:44:29.220 to me that i see that i need to make some changes in my life and i would like your support in that

00:44:35.820 i would i would like you to to understand that i'm trying to fix this for me and for us

00:44:41.660 and i want to be here emotionally and mentally and physically i i love you i'm attracted to you

00:44:48.780 and i see that there's some things i need to do on my end and i gave you the list

00:44:52.240 eat better move your body um you know with it with you being in alaska it's probably cold and dark and

00:45:01.260 miserable at times so that could be adding to your depression as well uh you know i don't know about

00:45:07.260 alaska but seattle is notorious for depression because of the same the pacific northwest right

00:45:13.140 or uh yeah northwest um get your hormones checked get some friends find a meaningful hobby do some

00:45:21.280 journaling there's like six things that you can do today that are gonna actually start moving the

00:45:28.880 needle in improving now if it's chronic depression you need to see a medical professional about it but

00:45:33.480 the things that i told you even if it is chronic depression the things that i told you are going

00:45:38.000 to improve your mood a hundred percent like i even food like i've been more sensitive to food as i get

00:45:45.440 a little bit older than i have in the past and i would love to go to carl's jr today and get a double

00:45:51.160 bacon western cheeseburger which is my go-to fast food burger that is that is it for me i would love it

00:45:56.640 it sounds delicious my mouth is watering right now but i won't yeah because although it's going to be good

00:46:02.500 for like three minutes man i'll get bloated and sluggish and diarrhea and like all the things that

00:46:09.680 come with eating that then i'm like that's not worth it to me i'll eat clean i'll eat healthy i'll

00:46:16.200 eat i'll get some lean beef or eat some chicken and some asparagus and some rice and have a bunch of

00:46:22.120 water like yeah it's not as sexy but i just know i'll feel better and that's what i'm after at 44 years

00:46:28.340 old so you just have to make those sacrifices yeah sitting in the sauna is good for me like i love

00:46:34.320 sitting in the sauna for 10 to 15 to 20 minutes is what i'm doing now three to four days a week i love

00:46:39.780 it just sweat it all out sit in there and quiet like a little bit of suffering that comes with it and

00:46:46.280 then after a good sweat i'm like man i feel good so i get my workout in 45 to 55 minute workout and

00:46:53.500 15 to 20 minutes in the sauna three to four days a week i'm on fire totally totally you know josh one

00:47:01.260 thing you know i'm not gonna like pretend to be addressing depression right but but a consideration

00:47:07.860 for you is there's power of having hope for the future and so why are you up there what's this what's

00:47:17.180 the point of it you know get connected why are you working hard why are you guys separating from one

00:47:22.220 another is there is there light at the end of that tunnel have you identified that what's her

00:47:28.440 excitement about it hey we're gonna we're gonna separate i'm gonna go into a different state and do

00:47:33.940 all this work but when i get back we're going to do this like get really clear just don't grind and go

00:47:40.340 well it's just it is what we have to do to make money right it's like get clear on why this suffering

00:47:46.700 or this period of your time why you're doing what you're doing and get really clear with your

00:47:51.260 with your spouse on what the future looks like so you guys can work towards it you don't lose sight

00:47:56.640 of it and this isn't just no light at the end of the tunnel and and difficulty in your relationship

00:48:02.520 i mean full disclosure i don't mean to dramatize this but like josh i mean this could break you

00:48:08.420 this could break your relationship so you need to be really clear like is it worth it

00:48:16.120 and why are you doing it and make sure that she's enrolled

00:48:19.660 that's great advice i mean even can she am i dramatizing it do you feel that like i feel that

00:48:27.920 no right yeah like she i think you're spot on like i don't know yeah it's hard man like it's really

00:48:34.040 hard it's hard on you it's hard on her i don't know if you guys have kids but you know if you don't

00:48:37.900 it's easier just bring her up have her stay with you a couple weeks out of the out of the month

00:48:42.040 like if you have to be up there for work i get that and i i can appreciate that bring her up man 0.56

00:48:47.260 show her around have her have her be up there with you for a week or two you know have grandparents

00:48:51.660 watch the kids if that's the case and bring her up and spend some time with her let her know she's

00:48:55.500 important um it's easy to say when you're not depressed when you're depressed and in a hole

00:49:01.320 it's like you don't see that as easily but that's why you got to fix yourself man

00:49:06.700 you have to take responsibility for your for your health and and we gave you the ways to do it so

00:49:13.240 you don't have to do all those things by the way but you have to do something and um i had a guy

00:49:19.300 um mark walsh on the podcast and he was talking about this and i think what he said was

00:49:25.800 we when it comes to depression you know you have all this this clinical ideas and thoughts about it

00:49:32.600 therapy and that can work and there's value in that but the first thing that a man needs to do 0.75

00:49:37.880 is get out of his mind and into his body breath work cold exposure heat exposure physical discomfort

00:49:44.420 training working out uh joining a gym a jiu-jitsu gym martial arts going for a run going for a walk

00:49:51.220 box breathing like whatever you can do to get out of your mind and into your body is going to help you

00:49:56.540 be a more integrated person and you're just immediately going to feel better like if you sat and breathed

00:50:02.580 you would feel better if you set up a cold a cold bath and you're in alaska in the winter it

00:50:08.800 shouldn't be too difficult like cold exposure go in there go sit in the lake for two minutes

00:50:13.960 you know break a piece of ice and go sit in the lake from for a minute or two and yeah things are

00:50:20.500 going to slip away that fog that you're feeling that haze will definitely improve you know one thing

00:50:26.900 that crossed my mind just really uh maybe a value add to you josh i now that i think about it i've had

00:50:32.240 this problem when i first started um my consulting company geez 15 years ago the first contract i

00:50:39.460 landed was with the military for the dod and literally within a week's period of time i hopped

00:50:45.800 on a plane found a place to stay and i moved out to um arlington and asia stayed here in utah with the

00:50:53.420 kids and we learned something really quick we learned that it doesn't didn't matter if we talk daily

00:50:59.880 if we went beyond three weeks of not seeing each other we made up drama it was like what are you

00:51:08.220 doing you didn't call me back like like we lost our we were starting to lose our connection after

00:51:14.900 three weeks and we'd started getting in a fight for no reason like we're making stuff up and and

00:51:20.540 that's us right every every couple's different but we decided at that point it's like hey there's no more

00:51:25.900 than more than three weeks that we don't see each other and so every three weeks or so she would fly 0.98

00:51:31.000 out to the dc area and we'd spend the weekend you know exploring dc and then i'd say goodbye and i'd

00:51:38.980 back to work and that's what we had to do for that period of time because our our mayor it was disrupting

00:51:44.880 our marriage and our relationship if we were away from each other for too long so and you might have to

00:51:50.280 identify the same thing i'm curious about the making up uh making up fights and things i my my

00:51:56.660 theory you you tell me what you think about this but one of my theories as you were saying that is do

00:52:01.000 you feel like you guys made up fights because it felt more connected than just the monotony and not

00:52:09.000 seeing each at least it was something to connect over do you know do you see what i'm saying yeah this

00:52:14.280 is what i think i think when there is not enough what's the term i'm looking for when there's not

00:52:20.840 enough contribution to one another in a relationship you start looking for evidence to back a little bit

00:52:29.400 of your feelings that maybe this person doesn't care as much as you thought they did and then you'll

00:52:35.600 find evidence of it it's like easily you know the minute i tell her like yeah exactly like oh you

00:52:41.460 didn't call me back for three hours i'm like yeah i was just at the gym who's at the gym right it's

00:52:46.300 like oh my gosh right like but but if you don't feel loved like if you're not feeling loved by someone

00:52:52.000 you will look for the evidence to help support that feeling period right so you got to address it

00:52:59.160 and addressing it might be you need to be around each other or you make commitments right it's like we

00:53:04.460 we communicate better with each other or you know there's obviously some self-work to be done

00:53:09.660 around that right if you're jumping to the conclusion that you're not loved i mean it's

00:53:13.260 something else and unrelated to the relationship but but regardless right navigate the water

00:53:18.020 yeah agreed yeah wild you know what one thing that came up with yeah absolutely and you know what

00:53:26.180 what's sad you know not to use josh's circumstance um but like men need men to talk to

00:53:33.820 right and and we get to have this conversation with josh we actually don't know josh but we get

00:53:40.060 to have this conversation with him because he happened to post a question right on the facebook

00:53:43.100 group well if he was part of the iron council he probably wouldn't have not posted that question

00:53:48.700 why because he's part of a battle team of 10 to 15 other men that he knows that he meets with on

00:53:55.100 a weekly basis that they're all rowing the same a boat in the same direction and progressing and they

00:54:00.540 they intimately know one another he would have had this conversation not just with one or two guys

00:54:06.320 on a podcast he would have had it with his team and his team would probably be following up with him

00:54:11.980 next week about how's it going giving him additional insights and additional recommendations and he could

00:54:18.780 work through stuff that's the power of the iron council that's the power of having a battle team that's

00:54:24.540 the power of having a brotherhood of men that are willing to support and speak into you and so maybe

00:54:31.260 a call to action for josh or if you feel like you relate to josh look into the iron council look to band

00:54:37.740 with us uh and get connected with like-minded guys that will hold you accountable where so when we have

00:54:43.980 these difficult times in our lives we have a network to work with that will support us so to learn more

00:54:50.940 go to order man.com iron council and of course you know connect with michler on on the on the socials

00:54:57.980 anything else sir that you want to add on on the ic well i was just going to say one of the other

00:55:02.460 things one of the other benefits is that you know you could hear this advice from me and kip and and it

00:55:08.220 could be good advice or not good advice but you could hear it once and implement it and then you kind

00:55:11.900 of always slip back into old patterns the cool thing about that scenario is if josh is on a battle team

00:55:18.380 those guys are checking in on him daily hey man how you feeling hey man did you go to the gym today

00:55:22.940 hey did you get your cold exposure in hey when when did you schedule the time to go into the doctor to

00:55:28.460 get your hormonal levels checked your blood work done that's that's accountability there's an

00:55:33.580 interesting thing about accountability that i heard from a previous guest father stephen gadbury and he

00:55:37.580 said you know pointing things out to people is not accountability hey man you're doing this wrong

00:55:42.380 you're doing that wrong you're doing this wrong do this different do that's not accountability

00:55:45.820 that could just be being a jerk and casting stones he said true accountability is being willing to call

00:55:51.340 behavior out in a person that you care about and walk with them in the journey and if you're not

00:55:59.100 walking with a person in a journey then you might just be a jerk true accountability takes place when

00:56:07.660 somebody says i know you can do better and i'm gonna help you make sure that you do and i'm gonna

00:56:15.980 walk with you in it and you're gonna do the same thing for me by the way and we're gonna do this

00:56:19.500 together that's true accountability so again order of man.com iron council kip i appreciate you man

00:56:25.580 guys great questions today hopefully we gave you some things to ponder on and consider um i'm very

00:56:29.580 curious about what other movies boys should watch i've got three boys and a little girl so if you guys

00:56:35.020 have movies hit me up let me know and we'll share those as well uh we will be back on friday until

00:56:42.220 then go out there take action and become a man you are meant to be thank you for listening to the order

00:56:47.180 of man podcast you're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be

00:56:52.700 we invite you to join the order at order of man.com

Order of Man - February 25, 2026

Be a Better Man, Raise Your Sons Right, and Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Body ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

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