Order of Man - April 19, 2024


Communication is King ｜ FRIDAY FIELD NOTES


Episode Stats

Length

16 minutes

Words per Minute

180.18954

Word Count

3,004

Sentence Count

234

Misogynist Sentences

1

Hate Speech Sentences

10


Summary

When we talk about being a better communicator, it's often filtered through the lens of when you communicate with others. But how do we be good listeners? How do we become good receivers of that information? And this is crucial, whether it's a personal platonic or romantic relationship or in the professional space, your ability to listen effectively, hear what people are saying, process the information that needs to be processed, and then come up with a course of action is going to differentiate between failure and success.


Transcript

00:00:00.820 Gentlemen, this Friday Field Notes is a little bit different.
00:00:03.520 Normally, I would record something specifically for you,
00:00:06.100 but in this case, I gave a quick presentation
00:00:08.680 on seven effective communication strategies
00:00:11.500 as the receiver of information.
00:00:14.040 Often when we talk about or hear about
00:00:16.640 being a better communicator,
00:00:18.480 it's filtered through the lens
00:00:19.860 of when you communicate with others.
00:00:21.920 But how do we be good listeners?
00:00:23.900 How do we be good receivers of that information?
00:00:26.520 And this is crucial,
00:00:27.360 whether it's a personal platonic or romantic relationship
00:00:32.040 or in the professional space,
00:00:33.640 your ability to listen effectively,
00:00:36.060 hear what people are saying,
00:00:38.080 process the information that needs to be processed,
00:00:39.960 and then come up with a course of action
00:00:42.100 is going to differentiate between failure and success.
00:00:46.340 So this is a recording that I did
00:00:48.480 in our exclusive brotherhood, the Iron Council.
00:00:51.160 And I hope you enjoy, I hope you get some good feedback.
00:00:54.120 If you're interested in what the Iron Council is all about,
00:00:56.680 we are closed for enrollment right now,
00:00:58.600 but we will be opening back up in a couple of months.
00:01:01.380 And you can check that out at orderofman.com
00:01:03.740 slash ironcouncil.
00:01:05.780 In the meantime, guys, please enjoy this topic,
00:01:10.300 this presentation on effective communication
00:01:12.620 for the receiver.
00:01:14.160 You're a man of action.
00:01:15.500 You live life to the fullest.
00:01:17.120 Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.
00:01:19.960 When life knocks you down,
00:01:21.280 you get back up one more time, every time.
00:01:24.140 You are not easily deterred or defeated,
00:01:26.760 rugged, resilient, strong.
00:01:29.580 This is your life.
00:01:30.660 This is who you are.
00:01:32.080 This is who you will become.
00:01:33.780 At the end of the day,
00:01:34.980 and after all is said and done,
00:01:36.820 you can call yourself a man.
00:01:39.620 And I want to talk about effective communication with people,
00:01:42.900 but I want to talk about it
00:01:43.980 in a little bit different context than we normally hear it.
00:01:47.000 When we typically hear effective communication,
00:01:49.300 we hear it through the lens of how you're
00:01:51.000 to communicate effectively with other people.
00:01:52.800 And there's value in that.
00:01:54.200 Obviously, we need to know how to do that.
00:01:56.040 And I think we talk about that ad nauseum at times.
00:01:59.760 But I want to talk with you guys
00:02:01.440 about effective communication
00:02:03.040 from the position of the receiver of that information.
00:02:07.080 Because I believe there is a huge, huge responsibility
00:02:09.800 that the receiver of information has too
00:02:12.240 in a healthy discussion and conversation.
00:02:15.000 Whether it's something here
00:02:16.340 where you guys are sharing feedback with me
00:02:18.100 and I'm receiving it,
00:02:19.180 or an employee-employer relationship,
00:02:21.500 and maybe your employer is telling you
00:02:23.100 that he has a new initiative,
00:02:24.380 or your wife is communicating with you
00:02:26.680 and she's explaining how she feels.
00:02:28.800 We have a really, really powerful opportunity
00:02:30.980 to be a great communicator
00:02:32.620 in that conversation as the receiver.
00:02:35.860 And I tend to look at communication
00:02:37.900 as 100%, 100% activity.
00:02:41.140 It's like the adage when you hear about a marriage
00:02:43.320 and they say a marriage is not 50-50,
00:02:45.360 it's 100-100, meaning the husband's pouring 100% in
00:02:48.980 and the wife is pouring 100% in.
00:02:51.140 If it doesn't work that way, it doesn't work.
00:02:53.340 Communication's the same way.
00:02:55.220 The person communicating the message
00:02:56.740 has a 100% responsibility
00:02:58.760 of an effective delivery of that message
00:03:01.520 so it's received and acted on.
00:03:03.920 Also, the receiver of the information
00:03:07.180 has 100% responsibility
00:03:09.260 in receiving that information correctly,
00:03:12.120 accurately, and processing it
00:03:14.100 in a way that leads to results.
00:03:16.360 So again, we talk a lot about communication
00:03:18.500 from the delivery.
00:03:19.900 I want to talk about it from the receiver.
00:03:22.000 So I've got six points
00:03:23.120 and actually seven points here
00:03:24.500 based on our conversation today
00:03:25.920 that I just added one to it.
00:03:27.440 But number one, here's the first point.
00:03:29.820 Know the outcome of what's happening.
00:03:33.080 Know the outcome of what's happening.
00:03:35.480 And we can actually use a lot of the
00:03:37.680 more heated conversations that we had today
00:03:40.120 to explain some of these points.
00:03:41.500 The outcome, as guys are sharing what they're sharing,
00:03:44.720 is not anything personal.
00:03:47.340 It's not to get at somebody.
00:03:49.960 It's to move the mission forward.
00:03:53.420 So what I think it's important to understand
00:03:56.060 is that people are people.
00:03:58.440 Human beings are flawed.
00:03:59.760 We have emotions.
00:04:01.120 We don't always say what we mean.
00:04:03.540 And our job as receivers of the information
00:04:06.980 is to know what the outcome is
00:04:08.940 before we get into the conversation.
00:04:11.840 Because if you know what the point of the conversation is,
00:04:14.540 then you can afford people a little bit more grace
00:04:16.840 and you can have a little bit more of an understanding
00:04:19.560 and a litmus test
00:04:20.520 in how to filter the message
00:04:22.940 through the outcome that's trying to be received.
00:04:25.780 And you can also be an active participant
00:04:27.460 in the conversation
00:04:28.720 because you know what the end result is.
00:04:31.180 So if there's ever a point
00:04:32.580 where somebody's delivering a message
00:04:34.200 and you have no idea
00:04:35.420 why they're delivering that message
00:04:37.080 or communicating it with you,
00:04:38.420 it's really important to understand or ask,
00:04:41.180 hey, where do you see this going?
00:04:44.280 What would you like the outcome to be
00:04:46.000 of this conversation when we're all done?
00:04:48.140 If that isn't clearly stated
00:04:49.720 and you don't know what that is,
00:04:51.080 I think it's entirely appropriate
00:04:52.560 to ask the person,
00:04:54.320 what is it that they're trying to achieve?
00:04:56.680 Because then everything else can filter around that.
00:04:59.520 Number two, have established boundaries.
00:05:03.120 Have established boundaries.
00:05:04.560 As the receiver of the information,
00:05:06.920 it's still okay for you to have parameters
00:05:09.380 in which you expect to be treated.
00:05:11.620 So if you're getting into a heated argument
00:05:13.400 with your wife
00:05:14.000 and she's telling you
00:05:14.780 how big of a piece of shit you are
00:05:16.180 because of what you did or didn't do,
00:05:18.080 that might not be acceptable to you.
00:05:21.220 And you need to be able to understand
00:05:23.060 what is an acceptable
00:05:24.280 and not acceptable to you
00:05:25.900 and then communicate that to her.
00:05:27.980 Hey hon,
00:05:28.900 I'm willing to have this conversation with you.
00:05:31.280 I want to hear what feedback you have for me
00:05:33.520 because I want to be a better husband
00:05:35.220 and father for you and the family.
00:05:37.680 But I expect that to be done in a civil way.
00:05:40.900 So you will not call me names.
00:05:43.740 You will not raise your voice to me
00:05:45.480 and you will treat me with the respect I deserve.
00:05:47.880 And by the way,
00:05:48.320 I'll do the same things for you.
00:05:50.120 And if at any point in time,
00:05:51.640 it moves outside of that,
00:05:53.260 then I'm going to go ahead
00:05:54.440 and step away from the conversation
00:05:55.700 because this is how I expect to be treated.
00:05:58.220 We teach people how to communicate with us
00:06:00.620 through our responses.
00:06:01.500 And if you let somebody run all over you
00:06:04.260 or treat you like garbage,
00:06:05.700 they're going to.
00:06:07.280 And it might not even be deceitful,
00:06:09.120 but that's what's going to happen.
00:06:10.680 So know what your boundaries are,
00:06:12.140 know what you expect.
00:06:13.180 Also time boundaries.
00:06:15.120 You know,
00:06:15.380 some of us are a little bit more long-winded than others.
00:06:17.880 If we're having a conversation
00:06:19.680 and you have a time constraint,
00:06:22.420 it's okay to communicate the time constraint.
00:06:25.060 If I've got something going on,
00:06:27.220 Frank,
00:06:27.760 I might have to say to you,
00:06:29.740 hey, Frank,
00:06:30.220 I have a half an hour today
00:06:31.360 and that's it.
00:06:33.880 And if we need to finish the conversation up,
00:06:36.000 we can finish it at a later date,
00:06:37.280 but I only have 30 minutes today
00:06:38.720 and it's okay to end a conversation.
00:06:42.040 So if we bump up on that half hour mark,
00:06:44.040 hey, Frank,
00:06:45.380 I told you I only have a half an hour.
00:06:47.020 I have to get to this other meeting
00:06:48.160 because it's doing that other meeting
00:06:50.420 a disservice too
00:06:51.800 if you don't honor that other meeting
00:06:53.000 that you created.
00:06:54.100 So have the boundaries.
00:06:55.820 Frank,
00:06:56.140 I'm kind of giving you a hard time,
00:06:58.140 but kind of telling the truth.
00:06:59.980 All right.
00:07:00.540 Number three,
00:07:01.980 strive for understanding.
00:07:04.120 Okay.
00:07:04.520 Strive for understanding in the conversation.
00:07:07.120 Do not play dumb.
00:07:10.780 Okay.
00:07:11.240 It's not conducive to a healthy conversation.
00:07:16.520 I just told you,
00:07:17.620 we mess up,
00:07:18.560 we screw up,
00:07:19.580 we get emotional,
00:07:21.140 we say the wrong things,
00:07:22.340 we trip over our words,
00:07:23.720 we say things that we don't mean
00:07:25.100 or it doesn't come out the way
00:07:26.140 that we see it in our minds.
00:07:27.200 You don't need to get tripped up
00:07:29.200 in all of that.
00:07:31.000 You need to strive for understanding
00:07:32.860 to the goal that we just talked about
00:07:35.120 in point number one.
00:07:36.080 What was the goal
00:07:37.060 and what is this person saying?
00:07:38.900 And try to understand
00:07:40.140 where that person's coming from.
00:07:42.060 Try to see it from their point of view.
00:07:44.780 Try to offer a little bit of grace
00:07:46.600 and class
00:07:47.240 and afford that person
00:07:48.280 the respect that they deserve.
00:07:50.120 You're having a conversation.
00:07:51.120 They deserve some level of respect.
00:07:53.460 If you didn't respect them at all,
00:07:54.860 probably just disengage
00:07:55.720 from the conversation entirely,
00:07:57.020 but you're having the conversation.
00:07:58.780 So what is it
00:08:00.180 that they're trying to communicate
00:08:01.300 and give them some grace
00:08:02.520 because they're going to mess up
00:08:03.780 the same way we do
00:08:04.800 when we communicate.
00:08:06.400 I,
00:08:06.620 one thing I often kind of laugh at is,
00:08:09.280 it's kind of an interesting thing,
00:08:12.700 but when you look at presidents,
00:08:14.400 for example,
00:08:15.460 you know,
00:08:15.840 the media takes
00:08:16.920 their words
00:08:18.300 and takes all of their,
00:08:19.280 their messaging
00:08:20.000 and their speeches
00:08:20.780 and they just like pick apart
00:08:22.560 every little stumble
00:08:23.660 of every little word.
00:08:25.000 I mean,
00:08:25.220 can you imagine
00:08:26.080 if you and I
00:08:27.660 were scrutinized to that level?
00:08:29.460 We'd have so many mess ups too.
00:08:32.400 And that's not to excuse
00:08:33.440 behavior necessarily,
00:08:34.580 but it is okay
00:08:36.080 to afford some grace
00:08:36.980 and leniency
00:08:37.500 because people suck
00:08:39.000 at communicating.
00:08:40.060 Myself included.
00:08:41.320 And this leads me
00:08:42.180 to point number four,
00:08:43.000 which is giving people
00:08:44.420 the benefit of the doubt.
00:08:45.460 Like how often
00:08:48.260 do we get offended
00:08:49.160 and do we get upset?
00:08:51.280 And then what we start to do
00:08:52.340 is we assume
00:08:53.040 the worst of other people.
00:08:54.440 This person's an asshole.
00:08:55.720 They're out to get me.
00:08:56.680 They don't like me.
00:08:57.500 Why is he a dick?
00:08:58.560 He's an idiot.
00:08:59.800 And we attack that person
00:09:01.600 because of how we feel about that.
00:09:05.000 Just give people
00:09:06.120 the benefit of the doubt.
00:09:07.240 Even if you're wrong,
00:09:08.240 I think it's better
00:09:09.000 to give people
00:09:10.080 the benefit of the doubt.
00:09:11.760 One of the,
00:09:12.380 one of my favorite quotes
00:09:13.300 around this subject is
00:09:14.560 never attribute to malice
00:09:16.680 what could be attributed
00:09:17.660 to stupidity.
00:09:18.840 We're dumb, guys.
00:09:20.720 We are dumb.
00:09:22.040 We're emotional.
00:09:23.000 We stumble over our words.
00:09:24.580 We often don't have
00:09:25.540 the right words.
00:09:26.400 We lose focus.
00:09:27.480 We're distracted.
00:09:28.880 We're thinking
00:09:29.400 about other things.
00:09:30.620 So when I communicate something,
00:09:32.360 I would hope
00:09:33.120 that you guys
00:09:33.780 give me a little bit
00:09:35.860 of grace
00:09:36.800 and give me
00:09:37.360 the benefit of the doubt
00:09:38.200 the same way
00:09:39.080 that you would want
00:09:39.760 that benefit of the doubt
00:09:40.760 when it comes
00:09:42.620 to you communicating.
00:09:44.240 Number five,
00:09:45.600 a willingness to clarify.
00:09:47.680 It's okay
00:09:48.440 that you don't
00:09:49.000 always understand things.
00:09:51.220 People communicate differently.
00:09:53.020 They have different
00:09:53.680 communication styles.
00:09:55.440 Sometimes they see things
00:09:56.480 so clearly over here,
00:09:57.420 but they can't articulate it
00:09:58.520 in a way you can receive it.
00:09:59.900 And that's okay.
00:10:00.900 If you don't understand
00:10:02.260 what somebody is saying,
00:10:03.920 clarify respectfully.
00:10:05.960 Hey,
00:10:06.580 I don't understand
00:10:08.020 what you mean by that.
00:10:09.060 Can you help me
00:10:09.660 understand what you're saying?
00:10:11.560 Hey,
00:10:12.040 can you say that
00:10:12.820 a different way?
00:10:13.460 Because I'm having
00:10:14.020 a hard time following
00:10:14.980 it the way
00:10:16.100 you're sharing it with me.
00:10:17.080 Is there another way
00:10:17.880 you can explain that?
00:10:18.840 Again,
00:10:19.160 I'm not putting it on them.
00:10:20.160 Is there another way
00:10:20.740 you can explain that
00:10:21.400 so I can understand?
00:10:24.660 You're not pointing
00:10:25.540 at them like,
00:10:26.440 well,
00:10:26.560 you're not explaining
00:10:27.340 that right.
00:10:29.180 Why are you explaining
00:10:30.040 like that's dumb?
00:10:31.000 Nobody gets it
00:10:31.780 when you explain it like that.
00:10:32.780 You see the difference?
00:10:34.820 At that point,
00:10:35.660 you're just,
00:10:36.060 you're being kind of a dick.
00:10:38.480 It's not to get at them
00:10:40.180 look at it
00:10:41.060 through your own lens.
00:10:42.060 Hey,
00:10:42.500 Jay,
00:10:42.880 you're sharing this idea
00:10:43.980 with me.
00:10:44.300 It's important to me.
00:10:45.140 I want to know
00:10:45.460 what you're saying.
00:10:46.180 I'm having a hard time
00:10:47.260 following.
00:10:47.900 Can you say that
00:10:48.380 a different way?
00:10:48.920 Because I'm a little
00:10:49.620 thick and dense at times.
00:10:51.260 Even make fun of yourself.
00:10:53.380 Okay,
00:10:53.500 that's the grace
00:10:54.180 that we need to give
00:10:55.240 to other people.
00:10:56.080 I don't need to say it.
00:10:56.840 Jay,
00:10:57.040 you're an idiot.
00:10:57.580 You can't explain that right.
00:10:59.960 That's not the case.
00:11:01.020 He sees it very clearly
00:11:01.960 in his mind
00:11:02.560 and it's different
00:11:03.060 than the way I see it.
00:11:03.960 So just let's talk
00:11:05.440 about it a little differently
00:11:06.400 so we both understand.
00:11:08.020 And I'm trying
00:11:09.340 to rush through
00:11:09.800 this a little bit,
00:11:10.320 guys,
00:11:10.500 because I do want
00:11:10.940 to get you
00:11:11.220 out of here on time.
00:11:12.340 Number six,
00:11:13.220 and then I have
00:11:13.680 number seven,
00:11:14.500 so I have two other points.
00:11:15.800 Number six,
00:11:16.900 do not engage
00:11:17.800 in logical fallacies.
00:11:20.180 They do not engage
00:11:21.420 in logical fallacies.
00:11:22.520 There's a really good resource.
00:11:23.720 I'm going to pull it up
00:11:24.260 here real quick.
00:11:24.840 And it's called
00:11:28.340 yourlogicalfallacyis.com
00:11:31.720 yourlogicalfallacyis.com
00:11:34.040 And right on the homepage,
00:11:35.460 they've got about,
00:11:36.260 it looks like 20 or so
00:11:37.760 logical fallacies
00:11:39.260 that you can look at.
00:11:40.660 The ones that stand out
00:11:41.420 to me that I often hear
00:11:42.440 is the straw man argument,
00:11:45.080 right?
00:11:45.220 And the way they define
00:11:46.000 the straw man,
00:11:46.660 for example,
00:11:47.140 is misrepresenting
00:11:48.220 someone's argument
00:11:48.940 to make it easier
00:11:50.060 to attack.
00:11:51.820 How often do you have
00:11:52.660 conversations like that
00:11:53.880 where somebody
00:11:55.260 makes a point
00:11:56.240 or clarifies
00:11:57.220 on something
00:11:57.960 that you're not even arguing?
00:11:59.280 That's a straw man.
00:12:00.440 The next one I hear
00:12:01.240 quite often
00:12:01.760 is the ad hominem attacks
00:12:03.040 where, you know,
00:12:04.720 you make a point
00:12:05.440 that somebody
00:12:05.820 doesn't agree with
00:12:06.500 and they say,
00:12:06.960 well, you're an idiot.
00:12:07.680 What the hell do you know?
00:12:09.140 It has nothing to do
00:12:10.560 with the argument.
00:12:12.040 Now you're attacking
00:12:12.800 their character
00:12:13.520 or attacking
00:12:14.840 their motive,
00:12:15.860 right?
00:12:16.260 The only reason he's,
00:12:17.460 here's one I hear a lot.
00:12:18.400 The only reason he's doing that
00:12:19.460 is because you're trying
00:12:19.960 to make money.
00:12:21.580 You're attacking the motive.
00:12:22.820 You don't know
00:12:23.600 another person's motives.
00:12:25.420 So attack the issues,
00:12:27.140 address the issues.
00:12:28.540 And the other one
00:12:29.400 I hear quite often
00:12:30.160 is appeal to authority.
00:12:32.280 Well, what do you know?
00:12:33.840 You didn't go to college
00:12:35.020 as if college
00:12:36.180 is the ultimate authority
00:12:37.540 on that particular subject
00:12:39.060 or show me your source.
00:12:41.520 Where's your source, right?
00:12:43.680 These are the things
00:12:44.220 you often hear.
00:12:45.000 It's these appeals
00:12:45.580 to authority.
00:12:46.400 If the other party
00:12:47.140 doesn't acknowledge
00:12:48.200 the authority,
00:12:49.240 it's useless.
00:12:51.240 It's pointless.
00:12:52.400 Another one you hear often
00:12:53.420 is appeal to God.
00:12:54.560 That's also appeal to authority.
00:12:56.240 Well, we shouldn't do that
00:12:58.200 because it's in the Bible.
00:12:59.960 Well, what about the people
00:13:00.900 who don't believe in the Bible?
00:13:03.000 Like that just weakens your case.
00:13:04.520 There's no case.
00:13:05.340 You might think it's a case,
00:13:06.520 but you're communicating
00:13:07.920 with somebody else
00:13:08.840 and they don't believe
00:13:09.660 it's a case
00:13:10.140 because they don't believe
00:13:10.860 in that authority.
00:13:12.360 So you have to be careful
00:13:13.460 of appealing to authority.
00:13:14.560 Those are a couple
00:13:15.000 that stand out to me.
00:13:16.420 The last point, guys,
00:13:17.620 here when it comes
00:13:18.160 to receiving information,
00:13:19.540 this might be
00:13:21.060 one of the hardest ones to do.
00:13:23.200 And I think it really
00:13:24.560 can be underscored
00:13:26.360 in difficult conversations
00:13:27.800 like we had today.
00:13:28.740 And that is
00:13:29.500 don't take things personally.
00:13:33.540 Do not take things personally,
00:13:35.760 even if they're personal.
00:13:38.520 Because it makes you
00:13:39.520 sound emotional.
00:13:40.380 It makes you sound silly.
00:13:41.840 It makes you say
00:13:42.700 and do dumb things.
00:13:43.940 And it makes you sound petty.
00:13:45.340 Don't take things personal.
00:13:49.700 Again, to go back
00:13:50.580 to the point number four,
00:13:53.480 give people the benefit
00:13:54.500 of the doubt.
00:13:56.280 If Jay and I
00:13:57.100 are having a conversation
00:13:58.040 and he's never done this
00:13:58.880 and I can't imagine he would
00:13:59.880 and he gets really heated
00:14:00.820 about something,
00:14:01.400 he says,
00:14:01.960 dude, you're such an asshole.
00:14:04.580 I'm not going to take
00:14:05.600 that personally.
00:14:07.080 Now, he's right.
00:14:08.060 I am.
00:14:08.960 But I'm not going
00:14:09.840 to take it personal
00:14:10.620 because it does nothing
00:14:11.740 to help this conversation.
00:14:13.920 I'm going to give him
00:14:14.720 the benefit of the doubt
00:14:15.400 because Jay has never
00:14:16.260 said that to me.
00:14:16.820 I can't imagine him doing that.
00:14:18.140 If he did,
00:14:18.540 I might say,
00:14:19.440 Jay, hold on.
00:14:20.380 Let's take a pause.
00:14:21.240 Boundaries, right?
00:14:22.700 Let's take a pause.
00:14:23.760 We're not going
00:14:24.260 to attack each other.
00:14:25.080 I'm not going
00:14:25.440 to engage in that.
00:14:26.640 But hey, man,
00:14:27.520 like this doesn't
00:14:28.340 sound like you.
00:14:29.260 Is everything okay?
00:14:31.880 That's point number four,
00:14:33.020 giving people
00:14:33.520 the benefit of the doubt.
00:14:35.640 Guys, it's important
00:14:36.600 not to take things personally,
00:14:38.160 even if they are.
00:14:40.620 Rise above that.
00:14:42.000 Even today,
00:14:42.820 I can tell you
00:14:43.600 and full disclosure,
00:14:45.180 as I hear these things,
00:14:46.500 I feel it.
00:14:47.620 I can feel it.
00:14:49.060 The temperature rise.
00:14:50.380 The blood starts
00:14:51.060 to boil a little bit.
00:14:52.260 You get defensive.
00:14:53.400 Ego gets in the way.
00:14:54.380 I felt that today
00:14:55.400 as I'm trying
00:14:56.740 to communicate this
00:14:57.480 with you.
00:14:58.440 But again,
00:14:58.980 we're not taking
00:15:00.080 things personally.
00:15:01.980 I think if all of us
00:15:03.300 adopted these seven strategies
00:15:04.760 a little bit more effectively,
00:15:06.480 we would have
00:15:07.220 better relationships.
00:15:08.720 More opportunities
00:15:09.660 would be presented
00:15:10.760 to us.
00:15:11.720 More people
00:15:12.400 would give us
00:15:12.960 the benefit of the doubt.
00:15:13.940 We would have
00:15:14.660 a greater understanding
00:15:15.600 about who people are,
00:15:16.820 the people that we love
00:15:17.620 and care about in our lives,
00:15:18.600 and more shit
00:15:19.760 would get done.
00:15:21.320 So that's my message
00:15:22.380 to you guys.
00:15:22.960 Again,
00:15:23.260 just to rehash real quick.
00:15:25.120 Number one,
00:15:25.900 know the outcome.
00:15:26.840 Number two,
00:15:28.020 have established boundaries.
00:15:29.400 Number three,
00:15:30.060 strive for understanding.
00:15:31.180 Don't play dumb.
00:15:32.020 Number four,
00:15:32.900 give people
00:15:33.380 the benefit of the doubt.
00:15:34.280 Never attribute to malice
00:15:35.300 what could be attributed
00:15:36.120 to stupidity.
00:15:37.320 Number five,
00:15:37.940 a willingness to clarify
00:15:39.080 if you don't understand something.
00:15:40.700 Number six,
00:15:41.220 do not engage
00:15:41.860 in logical fallacies.
00:15:43.200 And number seven,
00:15:44.320 never take anything personal,
00:15:46.200 even if it is.
00:15:47.400 Rise above that.
00:15:48.180 Be better than that.
00:15:49.300 All right, guys.
00:15:50.040 That's it.
00:15:54.460 Thank you for listening
00:15:55.320 to the Order of Man podcast.
00:15:57.400 You're ready to take charge
00:15:58.460 of your life
00:15:59.020 and be more of the man
00:16:00.160 you were meant to be.
00:16:01.420 We invite you to join the order
00:16:02.760 at orderofman.com.
00:16:10.300 Thank you.