Do Not Cast Your Pearls Before Swine | FRIDAY FIELD NOTES
Episode Stats
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Summary
In this episode of Field Notes, Ryan discusses the benefits and downsides of putting yourself out there in the public eye. He also discusses a recent call he had with his good friend JP Donnell about the pros and cons of putting ourselves out there.
Transcript
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You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart
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your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.
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You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong. This is your life. This is who
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you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,
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you can call yourself a man. Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Michler,
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and I am the host and the founder of the order of man podcast and movement.
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Today is your Friday field notes. Get to hear from me and some of my thoughts I've been thinking about
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from throughout the week. And I think this one is probably going to be a bit shorter than it has in
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the past. They usually go for 20 to 30 minutes, but I anticipate this one being shorter. Although
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I do like the sound of my voice and I tend to be a bit long winded at times. Guys, if you're new and
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you're just joining us for the first time, this is a podcast dedicated to helping you become a better,
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more capable, more effective, more efficient husband, father, business owner, community leader,
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whatever facet of life you're showing up. I want to give you the tools, the conversations,
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and the resources needed to thrive. I was looking at the number of episodes that we've done up to this
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point. And I want to say we're up above nearly 700 episodes at this point. So over the past nearly
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six years now, we've put out so much information and I hope, and this is my goal that it's serving
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you and it's helping you become more effective in the roles that you play. Today, I wanted to talk
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with you briefly about a scripture. I know I don't talk a whole lot about scripture or spirituality here
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on this podcast, and that's actually by design. Some of you guys have asked me questions about it,
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but I did want to share something with you because I had an interesting call the other night with my
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good friend, JP Donnell. A lot of you guys know who he is. And we got talking about some different
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things and we got talking about our goals and ambitions and putting ourself out there in the
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public eye and the pros and cons of doing that. You know, the benefits of putting yourself out there
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are that you begin to articulate your voice. You have some of those perspectives and assumptions of
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your life challenged and pushed up against, which helps you to articulate and crystallize and clarify
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what it is you actually believe in what you think and how you want to behave. It gives you a new
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perspective, something to consider that maybe you hadn't considered before. And this is all good.
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You know, this is part of the reason the podcast serves me specifically so well outside of hopefully
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serving you is that I do get to share my thoughts and my ideas and the things that are important to me.
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And when you guys have conversations and disagreements, even that helps me, it helps me to
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be able to articulate my ideas better, which is important as a communicator. And that's what I do for
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a living, obviously. And it helps me to see things from a more well-rounded approach. And all of that is
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positive, but there's a downside also to sharing your perspective. And that is that you subject
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and expose yourself to potential mockery and ridicule and negative criticism and things that
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are not constructive or beneficial. In fact, they hinder you. So anytime I put one of my comments or
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thoughts or ideas out there in the public space, there's always a percentage of people who will come back
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and not just disagree, which I have no problem with, but will be completely disrespectful.
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Will undermine my efforts or my attempts to be a better man. Will not even remotely attempt to look
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at how I might view things from a wider, broader perspective. And they just see this one post and
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they think that it's wrong. And so I must be an evil human being. So, you know, there's downsides to
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putting yourself out in the world. And as my friend JP and I were talking about this the other night,
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I was reminded of a scripture. And I don't care if you're a scripture scholar, or even if you're
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Christian, I think there's a lot of principles that can be learned and applied in our life,
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regardless of our faith or lack thereof or denomination. And I wanted to read specifically
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a scripture. And I, and I pulled this up because I don't have it memorized. I'm not a scripturally
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scholar by any means, but the scripture is Matthew seven, six. And I read from the King James version
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of the Bible. And again, it's Matthew seven, six. And it says this, give not that which is holy unto
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the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet and turn
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again to rend you. Let me read that again. Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast
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ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet and turn again and rend you.
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I'm often reminded of this scripture as I share my goals and desires and dreams and ambitions. And I
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believe they're noble. I wouldn't have those ambitions and goals and desires if that weren't the
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case. And often as I share this information with the public, I met with negativity, uh, with criticism,
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with potential hostility, even. And again, this isn't the, uh, the majority of the responses I get,
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but it's certainly a portion of the responses I get. And you know, what happens when I do that is
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a little part of me, even as a confident, self-assured man questions, questions, my motives,
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questions, my desires and my dreams and my ambitions, even though in any other context and
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any other situation, I feel good about who I am and how I'm showing up in the work that I'm doing.
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And I think this is the trap that we could fall into as we put our information out into the world.
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And we share the things that are important to us that are deeply meaningful and significant.
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And we just cast these things before people who are negative and vile and disgusting and would like
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nothing more than to see you and other people. And believe me, I don't think it's personal.
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And while it's not personal against me or against you, it's personal for them. They're miserable.
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They hate their lives. They're not doing the work that we've been doing over the past six years on
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themselves. And because they're not willing to do the work, they're afraid or they're, they're fearful
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or they, they didn't grow up in an environment where this stuff was, was important or learn these
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things that I'm teaching you or attempting to anyways. They'd rather you fail than to do the work
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required for them to thrive and to succeed. And your success poses a very serious and real threat
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to their own existence. And as we attempt to tell people like this, what our goals and our dreams and
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our ambitions and our desires and our hopes and our aspirations are, they want to tear that down guys.
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They want to diminish it. They want to mock it. They want to ridicule it. They don't want you to
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be the kind of man that you have the capability of becoming. So you got to be very, very careful
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about who you're telling this information to. Number one, you got to develop some thick skin
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because if you're going to put yourself in the public space as I have, and even if that's a podcast
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for you or a blog or a video series, or even if it's just at work or with your family, then you need
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to toughen up. You need to thicken that skin and realize that not everybody's going to agree with
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you. And that's fine. That's okay. I don't need everybody to agree with me. I'm confident enough
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that if somebody has a dissenting voice, I'm okay with that. If somebody has some, some opinions that
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are less than favorable of me, I'm okay with that. But to, to pretend that it wouldn't affect you even
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to the slightest degree is a bit naive and it, and it creates some, some problems or exposes some
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vulnerabilities that may keep you from doing what you want to do. So here's what I would suggest.
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Be very, very careful about who you're sharing your dreams and aspirations with.
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Now, I know that the common theme and the common idea and perception is that we should just share
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whatever it is we want to do. And social media has perpetuated this idea that we should share all of
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our dreams. I'm going to run a marathon. I'm going to start a business. I'm going to do this. I'm going
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to do that. And we're just supposed to exclaim it to the world. I would say we probably ought to be a
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little bit more thoughtful about that because as the scripture, Matthew seven, six says, and I'm going
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to pull it up again here. So don't butcher. It says, give not that which is holy unto the dogs. And
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guys, there are dogs out there who want to see you fail miserably and, and actually not just want to
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see you fail will actually revel in you failing and you being as miserable as they are. Back to
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scripture. Neither cast ye pearls before the swine, lest they trample them. And isn't that what people
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do? Trample your dreams and desires, mock, ridicule, belittle, make fun of, diminish, trample them under
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their feet and turn again and rend you. So they trample your dreams and then they come back for you
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again. I don't want this to be a negative podcast. So here's what I would suggest on a positive note.
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And then we'll wrap things up. Like I said, this is going to be a short one today. If we are instructed
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not to cast our pearls, the things that we desire, the things that are meaningful and significant and
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important and valuable to us before swine, then I think the opposite holds true that maybe instead we
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ought to cast those pearls before those who are worthy. What does it mean to be worthy in this
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context? What I suggest is those people who edify you, those people who uplift you, those people who
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want you to succeed. Just as my friend JP wants me to succeed. He called me to have these conversations.
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I want him to succeed. He wants me to succeed. There's other people in my circle. Those of you who
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know Kip Sorensen, who is my co-host, he wants me to succeed. I want him to succeed. And I am more
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than happy and willing. And frankly, I should cast my dreams and ambitions and desires before those
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people, because those are the individuals who are going to help me. Kip's going to help me accomplish
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my goals. JP is going to help me accomplish my goals. Those of you who believe in what we're doing
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here are going to help me accomplish my goals. My wife, my children are going to help me accomplish my
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goals. I may not always be comfortable. I don't have to always be in agreement with what they say,
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but I always know that what they share is in my best interest. And so I don't share everything with
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the masses because it isn't relevant to them. And frankly, they haven't proved to me
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that they do have my best interest at heart. So contrary to popular belief, that belief that you
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should share everything with everybody, I would suggest that maybe you'd be a little bit more
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selective with who you share your dreams and ambitions and desires with. And instead of sharing
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those with people who would love to see you fail, only share your hopes and dreams and desires with
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those who would love to see you succeed. And not only love to see it, are actively engaged in helping
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you accomplish what it is you want to accomplish. Now that doesn't mean they need to follow you
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blindly or pledge their allegiance to you. It means that they care about you.
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They care about you enough to say things that aren't always comfortable that maybe you don't
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necessarily want to hear or won't feel good hearing, but they do it from a position of care and love
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and wanting to see you thrive. And it's your job. It's your job to decipher and decide who it is
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that cares about you and who it is that does not care about you guys. Don't share everything with
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everybody with this, uh, this digital age that we live in. And this it's highly driven by social media.
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We, we, we would be tempted to, and, and some of the things that, that we could potentially share
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the things that would get the most engagement interaction and likes and attention and all of
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that feels wonderful. But you have one asshole who comes in and, and undercuts what it is you're
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doing. It diminishes to even the slightest degree, your potential of actually realizing that objective.
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Why would I want to do that? I don't, those people don't care about me and they don't care
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about you. All they care about doing is, and again, I'm going to reference scripture. I don't
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want to butcher this trample them, your pearls trample them under their feet. And when they're
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done trampling your dreams and desires under their feet, they turn again and render, excuse me, and rend you.
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This is a short one guys, but it's an important lesson. You don't need to share everything with
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everybody, but you do need to share some of that with the people you care about. And that's up to
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you to decide who are the people that care about you? Who are the people that want to see you thrive?
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Who are the people that want to see you win? And who are those who are going to actively engage
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themselves in the cause that you are? There's people that I deeply, deeply care about that. I want
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to see when one person I can think of right off hand, two people actually is Pete Roberts and Brian
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Littlefield with origin. I talk about these guys weekly because they're show sponsors, but they're
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friends more, more important than show sponsors, they're friends. And I call these guys and I text
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these guys and I ask about what they're doing. And I ask how I can support them. And I look for
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opportunities to help them win because I care about them. And I hope that they care about me. I believe
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they do. And so I can tell these guys things that I wouldn't tell anybody else. If you
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don't have people like that in your life, you're missing a very powerful opportunity to get an
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ally in your corner. And, and think about this metaphor, you stepping into the octagon or you
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stepping into the boxing ring and knowing that there's guys who can't necessarily get in the
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fight with you. It's against the rules, right? They can't do it for you. They can't fight your battles,
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but they're in your corner and they're coaching you and they're mentoring you and they're telling
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things you need to hear. And they're training with you and they're guiding you and they're slapping
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you in the face when you need it, kicking it in the ass when you need it, celebrating with you,
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honoring you as you thrive and succeed and do what you're capable of. If you don't have those types
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of people, you better get those types of people in your corner. And I've been talking about it for
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six years. I won't drone on about it today. Build a band of brothers, communicate fully and faithfully
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with your wife and children, find friends, find colleagues, find bosses, find brothers and mentors
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who will support you so that you can take your pearls, the things that you care about,
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that you deeply care about and value. And you can cast those things before the people who care about
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you because they're going to honor that, not dishonor that. Like I said, this would be a short
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one today, but what a powerful lesson. Let me read it again, just so you can wrap your heads around
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this. Matthew 7, 6 and the King, excuse me, King James version of the Bible. Give not that which is
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holy unto dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet and
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turn again and rend you. And I would add to this instead, consider casting your pearls before
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those who want to see you thrive and win, because they're going to help you do it. Drop the ego,
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drop the need to be loved and appreciated and respected and validated by everybody else. And
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find those people who truly care about you, who truly want you to win, and then open yourself to
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up to those individuals so they can share things that might actually help you accomplish what it is
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you desire. All right, guys, that's it. Chew on that this weekend. Think about how you might apply
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that in your, in your week and in your life. And we'll be back next week for another exciting
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interview and the AMA and another Friday field notes. And we'll continue to drive on as we have
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over the past nearly six years now. Guys go out there, take action. Do not cast your pearls before
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swine. Become the man you are meant to be. Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast.
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If you're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be,
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we invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.