Order of Man - October 30, 2020


Do Not Cast Your Pearls Before Swine | FRIDAY FIELD NOTES


Episode Stats


Length

17 minutes

Words per minute

181.49821

Word count

3,094

Sentence count

183

Harmful content

Misogyny

1

sentences flagged

Toxicity

9

sentences flagged

Hate speech

3

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode of Field Notes, Ryan discusses the benefits and downsides of putting yourself out there in the public eye. He also discusses a recent call he had with his good friend JP Donnell about the pros and cons of putting ourselves out there.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart
00:00:04.980 your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.
00:00:10.460 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong. This is your life. This is who
00:00:17.220 you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,
00:00:22.780 you can call yourself a man. Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Michler,
00:00:27.780 and I am the host and the founder of the order of man podcast and movement.
00:00:31.720 Today is your Friday field notes. Get to hear from me and some of my thoughts I've been thinking about
00:00:35.360 from throughout the week. And I think this one is probably going to be a bit shorter than it has in
00:00:40.600 the past. They usually go for 20 to 30 minutes, but I anticipate this one being shorter. Although
00:00:45.100 I do like the sound of my voice and I tend to be a bit long winded at times. Guys, if you're new and
00:00:50.900 you're just joining us for the first time, this is a podcast dedicated to helping you become a better,
00:00:55.360 more capable, more effective, more efficient husband, father, business owner, community leader,
00:01:01.440 whatever facet of life you're showing up. I want to give you the tools, the conversations,
00:01:05.040 and the resources needed to thrive. I was looking at the number of episodes that we've done up to this
00:01:10.200 point. And I want to say we're up above nearly 700 episodes at this point. So over the past nearly
00:01:20.220 six years now, we've put out so much information and I hope, and this is my goal that it's serving
00:01:26.800 you and it's helping you become more effective in the roles that you play. Today, I wanted to talk
00:01:31.640 with you briefly about a scripture. I know I don't talk a whole lot about scripture or spirituality here
00:01:39.780 on this podcast, and that's actually by design. Some of you guys have asked me questions about it,
00:01:44.380 but I did want to share something with you because I had an interesting call the other night with my
00:01:49.840 good friend, JP Donnell. A lot of you guys know who he is. And we got talking about some different
00:01:55.400 things and we got talking about our goals and ambitions and putting ourself out there in the
00:02:00.840 public eye and the pros and cons of doing that. You know, the benefits of putting yourself out there
00:02:05.800 are that you begin to articulate your voice. You have some of those perspectives and assumptions of
00:02:13.240 your life challenged and pushed up against, which helps you to articulate and crystallize and clarify
00:02:19.340 what it is you actually believe in what you think and how you want to behave. It gives you a new
00:02:24.000 perspective, something to consider that maybe you hadn't considered before. And this is all good.
00:02:29.640 You know, this is part of the reason the podcast serves me specifically so well outside of hopefully
00:02:34.040 serving you is that I do get to share my thoughts and my ideas and the things that are important to me.
00:02:41.820 And when you guys have conversations and disagreements, even that helps me, it helps me to
00:02:49.800 be able to articulate my ideas better, which is important as a communicator. And that's what I do for
00:02:55.240 a living, obviously. And it helps me to see things from a more well-rounded approach. And all of that is
00:03:00.960 positive, but there's a downside also to sharing your perspective. And that is that you subject
00:03:10.920 and expose yourself to potential mockery and ridicule and negative criticism and things that
00:03:18.780 are not constructive or beneficial. In fact, they hinder you. So anytime I put one of my comments or
00:03:25.100 thoughts or ideas out there in the public space, there's always a percentage of people who will come back
00:03:30.120 and not just disagree, which I have no problem with, but will be completely disrespectful.
00:03:36.460 Will undermine my efforts or my attempts to be a better man. Will not even remotely attempt to look
00:03:45.580 at how I might view things from a wider, broader perspective. And they just see this one post and
00:03:51.420 they think that it's wrong. And so I must be an evil human being. So, you know, there's downsides to
00:03:57.660 putting yourself out in the world. And as my friend JP and I were talking about this the other night,
00:04:02.160 I was reminded of a scripture. And I don't care if you're a scripture scholar, or even if you're
00:04:09.500 Christian, I think there's a lot of principles that can be learned and applied in our life,
00:04:14.660 regardless of our faith or lack thereof or denomination. And I wanted to read specifically
00:04:21.700 a scripture. And I, and I pulled this up because I don't have it memorized. I'm not a scripturally
00:04:26.860 scholar by any means, but the scripture is Matthew seven, six. And I read from the King James version
00:04:31.740 of the Bible. And again, it's Matthew seven, six. And it says this, give not that which is holy unto
00:04:39.300 the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet and turn
00:04:46.880 again to rend you. Let me read that again. Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast
00:04:55.620 ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet and turn again and rend you.
00:05:03.360 I'm often reminded of this scripture as I share my goals and desires and dreams and ambitions. And I
00:05:08.860 believe they're noble. I wouldn't have those ambitions and goals and desires if that weren't the
00:05:12.780 case. And often as I share this information with the public, I met with negativity, uh, with criticism,
00:05:23.500 with potential hostility, even. And again, this isn't the, uh, the majority of the responses I get,
00:05:29.820 but it's certainly a portion of the responses I get. And you know, what happens when I do that is
00:05:34.360 a little part of me, even as a confident, self-assured man questions, questions, my motives,
00:05:44.720 questions, my desires and my dreams and my ambitions, even though in any other context and
00:05:51.180 any other situation, I feel good about who I am and how I'm showing up in the work that I'm doing.
00:05:56.660 And I think this is the trap that we could fall into as we put our information out into the world.
00:06:00.980 And we share the things that are important to us that are deeply meaningful and significant.
00:06:05.720 And we just cast these things before people who are negative and vile and disgusting and would like
00:06:17.020 nothing more than to see you and other people. And believe me, I don't think it's personal.
00:06:22.520 And while it's not personal against me or against you, it's personal for them. They're miserable. 0.99
00:06:28.400 They hate their lives. They're not doing the work that we've been doing over the past six years on 0.98
00:06:34.600 themselves. And because they're not willing to do the work, they're afraid or they're, they're fearful
00:06:41.380 or they, they didn't grow up in an environment where this stuff was, was important or learn these
00:06:47.840 things that I'm teaching you or attempting to anyways. They'd rather you fail than to do the work
00:06:57.220 required for them to thrive and to succeed. And your success poses a very serious and real threat
00:07:06.260 to their own existence. And as we attempt to tell people like this, what our goals and our dreams and
00:07:15.520 our ambitions and our desires and our hopes and our aspirations are, they want to tear that down guys.
00:07:23.180 They want to diminish it. They want to mock it. They want to ridicule it. They don't want you to
00:07:28.380 be the kind of man that you have the capability of becoming. So you got to be very, very careful
00:07:32.960 about who you're telling this information to. Number one, you got to develop some thick skin
00:07:37.280 because if you're going to put yourself in the public space as I have, and even if that's a podcast
00:07:43.080 for you or a blog or a video series, or even if it's just at work or with your family, then you need
00:07:49.960 to toughen up. You need to thicken that skin and realize that not everybody's going to agree with 0.89
00:07:53.520 you. And that's fine. That's okay. I don't need everybody to agree with me. I'm confident enough
00:07:57.760 that if somebody has a dissenting voice, I'm okay with that. If somebody has some, some opinions that
00:08:03.900 are less than favorable of me, I'm okay with that. But to, to pretend that it wouldn't affect you even
00:08:13.420 to the slightest degree is a bit naive and it, and it creates some, some problems or exposes some
00:08:24.000 vulnerabilities that may keep you from doing what you want to do. So here's what I would suggest.
00:08:29.780 Be very, very careful about who you're sharing your dreams and aspirations with.
00:08:36.120 Now, I know that the common theme and the common idea and perception is that we should just share
00:08:40.640 whatever it is we want to do. And social media has perpetuated this idea that we should share all of
00:08:45.820 our dreams. I'm going to run a marathon. I'm going to start a business. I'm going to do this. I'm going
00:08:49.420 to do that. And we're just supposed to exclaim it to the world. I would say we probably ought to be a
00:08:56.520 little bit more thoughtful about that because as the scripture, Matthew seven, six says, and I'm going
00:09:00.920 to pull it up again here. So don't butcher. It says, give not that which is holy unto the dogs. And
00:09:06.140 guys, there are dogs out there who want to see you fail miserably and, and actually not just want to 0.99
00:09:14.640 see you fail will actually revel in you failing and you being as miserable as they are. Back to 0.98
00:09:22.800 scripture. Neither cast ye pearls before the swine, lest they trample them. And isn't that what people
00:09:30.280 do? Trample your dreams and desires, mock, ridicule, belittle, make fun of, diminish, trample them under
00:09:38.580 their feet and turn again and rend you. So they trample your dreams and then they come back for you
00:09:47.040 again. I don't want this to be a negative podcast. So here's what I would suggest on a positive note.
00:09:55.780 And then we'll wrap things up. Like I said, this is going to be a short one today. If we are instructed
00:10:01.340 not to cast our pearls, the things that we desire, the things that are meaningful and significant and
00:10:06.880 important and valuable to us before swine, then I think the opposite holds true that maybe instead we
00:10:13.360 ought to cast those pearls before those who are worthy. What does it mean to be worthy in this
00:10:20.600 context? What I suggest is those people who edify you, those people who uplift you, those people who
00:10:28.800 want you to succeed. Just as my friend JP wants me to succeed. He called me to have these conversations.
00:10:36.160 I want him to succeed. He wants me to succeed. There's other people in my circle. Those of you who
00:10:41.420 know Kip Sorensen, who is my co-host, he wants me to succeed. I want him to succeed. And I am more
00:10:47.780 than happy and willing. And frankly, I should cast my dreams and ambitions and desires before those
00:10:54.240 people, because those are the individuals who are going to help me. Kip's going to help me accomplish
00:11:00.600 my goals. JP is going to help me accomplish my goals. Those of you who believe in what we're doing
00:11:05.880 here are going to help me accomplish my goals. My wife, my children are going to help me accomplish my
00:11:11.040 goals. I may not always be comfortable. I don't have to always be in agreement with what they say,
00:11:15.800 but I always know that what they share is in my best interest. And so I don't share everything with
00:11:24.840 the masses because it isn't relevant to them. And frankly, they haven't proved to me
00:11:33.020 that they do have my best interest at heart. So contrary to popular belief, that belief that you
00:11:41.440 should share everything with everybody, I would suggest that maybe you'd be a little bit more
00:11:45.100 selective with who you share your dreams and ambitions and desires with. And instead of sharing
00:11:50.620 those with people who would love to see you fail, only share your hopes and dreams and desires with
00:11:55.960 those who would love to see you succeed. And not only love to see it, are actively engaged in helping
00:12:01.680 you accomplish what it is you want to accomplish. Now that doesn't mean they need to follow you
00:12:06.620 blindly or pledge their allegiance to you. It means that they care about you.
00:12:12.420 They care about you enough to say things that aren't always comfortable that maybe you don't
00:12:17.560 necessarily want to hear or won't feel good hearing, but they do it from a position of care and love
00:12:22.820 and wanting to see you thrive. And it's your job. It's your job to decipher and decide who it is
00:12:30.400 that cares about you and who it is that does not care about you guys. Don't share everything with
00:12:37.200 everybody with this, uh, this digital age that we live in. And this it's highly driven by social media.
00:12:44.220 We, we, we would be tempted to, and, and some of the things that, that we could potentially share
00:12:50.980 the things that would get the most engagement interaction and likes and attention and all of
00:12:55.600 that feels wonderful. But you have one asshole who comes in and, and undercuts what it is you're 1.00
00:13:02.660 doing. It diminishes to even the slightest degree, your potential of actually realizing that objective. 1.00
00:13:08.100 Why would I want to do that? I don't, those people don't care about me and they don't care
00:13:12.880 about you. All they care about doing is, and again, I'm going to reference scripture. I don't
00:13:17.780 want to butcher this trample them, your pearls trample them under their feet. And when they're 0.98
00:13:24.340 done trampling your dreams and desires under their feet, they turn again and render, excuse me, and rend you.
00:13:31.800 This is a short one guys, but it's an important lesson. You don't need to share everything with
00:13:38.740 everybody, but you do need to share some of that with the people you care about. And that's up to
00:13:44.660 you to decide who are the people that care about you? Who are the people that want to see you thrive?
00:13:48.300 Who are the people that want to see you win? And who are those who are going to actively engage
00:13:52.160 themselves in the cause that you are? There's people that I deeply, deeply care about that. I want
00:13:57.080 to see when one person I can think of right off hand, two people actually is Pete Roberts and Brian
00:14:02.160 Littlefield with origin. I talk about these guys weekly because they're show sponsors, but they're
00:14:06.560 friends more, more important than show sponsors, they're friends. And I call these guys and I text
00:14:11.340 these guys and I ask about what they're doing. And I ask how I can support them. And I look for
00:14:15.940 opportunities to help them win because I care about them. And I hope that they care about me. I believe
00:14:23.200 they do. And so I can tell these guys things that I wouldn't tell anybody else. If you
00:14:27.000 don't have people like that in your life, you're missing a very powerful opportunity to get an
00:14:31.260 ally in your corner. And, and think about this metaphor, you stepping into the octagon or you
00:14:36.580 stepping into the boxing ring and knowing that there's guys who can't necessarily get in the
00:14:42.880 fight with you. It's against the rules, right? They can't do it for you. They can't fight your battles,
00:14:47.860 but they're in your corner and they're coaching you and they're mentoring you and they're telling
00:14:53.100 things you need to hear. And they're training with you and they're guiding you and they're slapping
00:14:56.940 you in the face when you need it, kicking it in the ass when you need it, celebrating with you, 0.99
00:15:01.000 honoring you as you thrive and succeed and do what you're capable of. If you don't have those types 0.99
00:15:05.440 of people, you better get those types of people in your corner. And I've been talking about it for
00:15:09.200 six years. I won't drone on about it today. Build a band of brothers, communicate fully and faithfully
00:15:16.060 with your wife and children, find friends, find colleagues, find bosses, find brothers and mentors
00:15:21.760 who will support you so that you can take your pearls, the things that you care about,
00:15:26.100 that you deeply care about and value. And you can cast those things before the people who care about
00:15:31.040 you because they're going to honor that, not dishonor that. Like I said, this would be a short
00:15:37.220 one today, but what a powerful lesson. Let me read it again, just so you can wrap your heads around
00:15:42.860 this. Matthew 7, 6 and the King, excuse me, King James version of the Bible. Give not that which is
00:15:48.260 holy unto dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet and
00:15:54.680 turn again and rend you. And I would add to this instead, consider casting your pearls before
00:16:05.360 those who want to see you thrive and win, because they're going to help you do it. Drop the ego,
00:16:11.580 drop the need to be loved and appreciated and respected and validated by everybody else. And
00:16:18.440 find those people who truly care about you, who truly want you to win, and then open yourself to
00:16:23.740 up to those individuals so they can share things that might actually help you accomplish what it is
00:16:29.300 you desire. All right, guys, that's it. Chew on that this weekend. Think about how you might apply
00:16:35.200 that in your, in your week and in your life. And we'll be back next week for another exciting
00:16:40.320 interview and the AMA and another Friday field notes. And we'll continue to drive on as we have
00:16:44.720 over the past nearly six years now. Guys go out there, take action. Do not cast your pearls before
00:16:49.660 swine. Become the man you are meant to be. Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast.
00:16:55.320 If you're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be,
00:16:59.680 we invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.