Order of Man - Do Not validate Mental Derangement, Men are NOT worthless, and Gi or No-Gi BJJ in a Street Fight

00:00:00.000 So here we have these overly feminist women saying,

00:00:05.300 you know what, men are worthless.

00:00:07.020 We don't need men in this world.

00:00:09.600 Women in our lives, if they got caught saying,

00:00:14.380 I need my husband, I need a man in my life,

00:00:19.540 that it would be met with like a little bit of an attack.

00:00:24.440 No, you don't.

00:00:25.620 You don't need men, right?

00:00:27.200 Like it's almost promoted from a social perspective

00:00:31.420 that a woman can't say they actually need a man in their life.

00:00:35.580 You're a man of action.

00:00:36.920 You live life to the fullest.

00:00:38.360 Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.

00:00:41.320 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time, every time.

00:00:45.780 You are not easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong.

00:00:50.820 This is your life.

00:00:51.900 This is who you are.

00:00:53.320 This is who you will become at the end of the day.

00:00:55.920 And after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.

00:01:00.340 Kip, what's up, brother?

00:01:01.260 So great to see you.

00:01:02.200 Sounds like you had a good week.

00:01:03.340 We were supposed to connect here in my neck of the woods, but that's hard, man.

00:01:07.700 It's like, man, when you go on vacation, people are like, hey, look me up.

00:01:11.580 Hey, let's get together.

00:01:12.540 And you'd like to with friends.

00:01:14.300 But usually when you go, you already have plans.

00:01:16.840 You have things mapped out.

00:01:18.460 It just it's hard to do.

00:01:19.580 Yeah, I appreciate that you see that because I'm like, damn it.

00:01:25.240 I was literally in your neighborhood and not visiting.

00:01:28.860 And it kind of I was actually kind of a little bit in a bad mood about it.

00:01:32.500 We had three different families.

00:01:33.940 We're kind of coordinating what everyone wants to do.

00:01:36.580 What I should have just done is I'm doing this.

00:01:39.260 Screw you guys.

00:01:40.400 That probably would have been most.

00:01:42.380 You're welcome to come along if you want.

00:01:44.120 Yeah, but there's some power to that.

00:01:46.600 We talk about this sometimes.

00:01:47.960 I've heard you say that so many times over the years is you want to plan a men's event.

00:01:52.220 You plan it.

00:01:53.020 You set the date.

00:01:54.080 This is what it is.

00:01:55.620 Feel free to show up if you'd like.

00:01:58.080 But this is what we're doing.

00:01:59.400 And far too often, we're all like trying to coordinate and appease everybody.

00:02:03.000 And it rarely ever works anyway.

00:02:06.740 Yeah, it is frustrating.

00:02:08.100 You know, and I also have realized too, most people just appreciate somebody who takes initiative.

00:02:13.040 You know, the guys who are all waffling over where you're going to eat for lunch today and how you're going to plan out the vacation.

00:02:20.360 And even in the dating pool, women are hoping that a guy will make the move.

00:02:24.120 I saw a statistic that 80% or 85% of women wish that men would make the first move.

00:02:33.920 And they don't.

00:02:35.520 They're afraid or whatever else it might be.

00:02:37.560 And it's interesting because 85% of women would like men to make the first move.

00:02:42.580 But they also treat them like crap when they actually make the first move.

00:02:47.340 So which one do you want?

00:02:50.000 Like, do you want the risk of having somebody who you maybe not are attracted to approach you?

00:02:55.100 Or do you want them to make the first move?

00:02:56.760 Because if you look, there's a graceful way to reject somebody.

00:03:00.360 If you do it with some grace and some class, fine.

00:03:03.040 You don't have to be attracted just because you want somebody to make the first move.

00:03:06.080 But it's kind of speaking out of both sides of your mouth on that one.

00:03:09.260 Totally.

00:03:10.280 What's the joke?

00:03:11.420 It's only – it's not creepy unless the guy is attractive.

00:03:17.340 You know, it's like –

00:03:19.140 Yeah.

00:03:19.660 You know.

00:03:20.060 Yeah.

00:03:21.280 It's – the level of harassment is basically contingent upon how attractive the guy is.

00:03:27.100 Totally.

00:03:27.740 You know, what I could get away with, Kip, is significantly greater than what you could get away with.

00:03:31.520 We'll just throw it out there like that.

00:03:32.620 Yeah, absolutely.

00:03:37.620 But it's true.

00:03:38.440 Yeah, man.

00:03:38.680 It's pretty interesting.

00:03:40.580 But I think all in all, people are looking for others to take initiative.

00:03:43.920 So it's fine though.

00:03:45.740 I'm not saying you should have.

00:03:46.860 I'm just saying I get it.

00:03:48.080 I've been there.

00:03:48.720 I've been up to your neck of the woods and not been able to make things work.

00:03:51.620 Not because I haven't want to.

00:03:52.920 Just because I'm actually just horrible at logistics.

00:03:55.300 That's really what it comes down to for me.

00:03:57.760 I usually let you know about six hours before I'll be up there that I'm going to be up there for the weekend.

00:04:02.220 Yeah.

00:04:02.980 No, well, I didn't do much better this weekend.

00:04:05.400 We'll make it happen, of course.

00:04:07.100 Well, in worst case, I'm going to see you at the Uprising, right, in less than a month.

00:04:11.480 You're going to see me at the Uprising.

00:04:13.100 You and I are going to go hunting together this year, which we still need to talk about.

00:04:16.580 So we got some plans.

00:04:18.420 Yep.

00:04:19.000 Yep.

00:04:19.300 We took initiative.

00:04:21.540 All right.

00:04:21.880 I did headlines first.

00:04:22.840 Well, let's get into headlines.

00:04:24.360 Yeah, last week I did headlines first.

00:04:26.260 Last week?

00:04:26.800 Okay.

00:04:27.080 So you're up.

00:04:27.940 All right.

00:04:28.220 So I'm starting.

00:04:29.740 This one comes.

00:04:30.660 It's kind of a it's it's it's not it's funny, but it's not funny.

00:04:34.340 It sounded funny.

00:04:36.700 It's funny, but it's kind of horrific, actually.

00:04:40.040 So this one comes from the National Review.

00:04:42.140 This was a couple of days ago.

00:04:44.320 The headline is this.

00:04:45.780 What comes after transgender?

00:04:48.060 Doctor amputates man's healthy fingers.

00:04:51.040 And I went through the article since we talked about making sure that you're actually reading

00:04:56.600 the article before you start talking about it and offering insight.

00:04:59.760 And there's a a term and I don't know how new this term is, but the term is body identity

00:05:05.040 integrity disorder.

00:05:06.380 B.I.I.D.

00:05:07.180 Of course, there has to be something for it.

00:05:08.900 Right.

00:05:09.220 Yeah.

00:05:09.440 And those patients obsessed that they're, quote, true selves are quadriplegic or amputees

00:05:16.740 or blind, and they yearn to be made that way.

00:05:20.000 It's a real and anguishing condition.

00:05:22.660 Some are now even calling it the calling the affliction transible.

00:05:28.100 So, look, this is the inevitable outcome.

00:05:31.120 All right.

00:05:31.460 The inevitable outcome of taking healthy men and women and mutilating their bodies, chopping

00:05:37.100 off their breasts, chopping off their penises, inverting their penises, and turning them into

00:05:41.340 fake vaginas.

00:05:42.960 The natural and inevitable result of this is that more and more people are going to begin

00:05:48.260 to mutilate their bodies.

00:05:50.020 Now, look, here's the argument.

00:05:51.940 Most people, I think, would probably say what an adult decides to do with his or her body

00:05:57.960 is entirely up to them.

00:05:59.240 I can see that argument.

00:06:01.860 The problem is, is that becomes so commonplace.

00:06:05.860 And one of the things that we see more often is this, I can't remember the term, gender,

00:06:13.120 sudden onset gender dysphoria, sudden onset gender dysphoria.

00:06:18.080 And there was a book on it.

00:06:19.540 Was it Abigail Schreier?

00:06:21.980 I'm going to look this up while I'm talking real quick.

00:06:24.020 I think it was Abigail Schreier.

00:06:28.920 Yes, irreversible damage.

00:06:30.920 And she talks about this sudden onset gender dysphoria as primarily being a social contagion.

00:06:39.700 And heaven forbid you talk about transgenderism being a social contagion.

00:06:44.480 Well, now we're getting into amputating healthy digits.

00:06:47.300 Next, it will be limbs.

00:06:49.580 Next, it will be body mutilation.

00:06:51.520 And what we're doing is we're normalizing mental disorders.

00:06:56.100 And then this is going to inevitably inflict our children because they're going to become

00:07:00.860 more and more familiar with it and think that it's part of the deal.

00:07:04.180 I was listening to a news article or a news report the other day, and I can't really quote here.

00:07:10.420 But what the person was saying is that they wanted to turn genitalia into artwork, basically

00:07:16.860 making genitalia both for men and women, different shapes and different sizes and different features.

00:07:23.300 It's ridiculous.

00:07:24.540 And it's against the natural order.

00:07:26.500 It's destructive to society.

00:07:28.200 It's dangerous for our kids.

00:07:29.880 And to Abigail Schreier's point, it's irreversible in many cases.

00:07:35.960 You know, if you chop your fingers off, you're not getting those fingers back.

00:07:39.200 You invert your penis and turn it into a fake vagina, you're not getting your penis back.

00:07:43.800 You lop off your breasts, sure, you can get a boob job, but it's not the same as having healthy, natural tissue for women.

00:07:50.820 It's so dangerous.

00:07:53.420 It's so pervasive.

00:07:54.980 And it's very frustrating.

00:07:56.140 And I think it's just going to get, continue to get worse unless people are willing to speak up against it and say, hey, no, this is not okay.

00:08:02.820 And where's the Hippocratic oath for doctors?

00:08:06.360 I thought doctors aren't supposed to harm people.

00:08:09.580 Totally.

00:08:10.460 You know, but we conflate all of this language and people say, well, what's the big deal with words and meanings change?

00:08:16.080 If we're doing it in a way to manipulate the language, the problem is things like this.

00:08:21.360 You know, a doctor, you hear things like silence is violence.

00:08:25.980 No, it isn't.

00:08:27.860 Stop saying that.

00:08:28.880 That's not accurate.

00:08:30.340 Because if you tell somebody they're being victimized, I think you brought this up a couple of weeks ago, then they're going to act on it.

00:08:38.380 If you say that gender dysphoria is reaffirming gender identity or whatever the term they use, that's not accurate.

00:08:51.240 That's a euphemism for what is actually happening, which is a dysphoria.

00:08:54.840 It's a medical illness.

00:08:56.600 And it should be treated as such.

00:08:58.780 So we have to use words in the proper context.

00:09:01.340 We have to use the right verbiage for what is actually happening because these are potentially medical decisions that are being made not only for grown adults who can make their own decisions, but this will obviously pour down into our children.

00:09:16.300 And we should speak out.

00:09:18.120 Adults can make whatever decisions they want.

00:09:20.200 Of course they can.

00:09:21.320 And we should also call people out and go, yeah, that's stupid and that's dumb and this is why.

00:09:27.740 And here's the drawbacks.

00:09:28.860 I mean, no different, if I told you I was doing something to my body because of whatever mental issue I had, you would call me out and you should.

00:09:37.980 Absolutely you should.

00:09:40.100 Right?

00:09:40.960 I can't help but look at this circumstance and go, what is this about?

00:09:45.920 What is this about?

00:09:47.260 I don't know about you.

00:09:48.500 I have people in my life that, man, they're victims.

00:09:51.840 They'll make themselves sick.

00:09:53.060 They live in an alternate world of being attacked and unable to survive in life and all these things are happening upon them.

00:10:03.320 This is just someone manifesting a mindset to make it true for them.

00:10:09.240 They want to be a victim.

00:10:10.840 They want people to feel sorry for them because I think I should be a paraplegic so that way everyone can feel sorry for me.

00:10:17.040 Oh, and this just affirms it.

00:10:19.540 It just validates it.

00:10:22.200 What a horrible way.

00:10:24.060 What a horrible thing to be validating.

00:10:26.860 And that it's this set point.

00:10:29.000 And it's it.

00:10:29.620 And it's a set thing that you're stuck with.

00:10:32.720 Guess what defines you and I, Ryan?

00:10:35.560 Not our limbs.

00:10:38.380 It's how we show up.

00:10:39.880 It's what we do.

00:10:41.260 It's how we serve people.

00:10:43.060 That defines us.

00:10:46.060 But no one wants to have that conversation of what actually defines you as a human and what what what contributions you're making to the world is is is is one of your values.

00:10:57.900 No one wants to have that.

00:10:58.820 Why?

00:10:59.160 Because that shit's hard.

00:11:00.080 That's why.

00:11:01.120 And it's much easier to sit back and be a victim and to be celebrated to be a victim.

00:11:06.980 And then here we are.

00:11:08.100 We celebrate it.

00:11:08.800 We help them.

00:11:09.820 Help them be victims.

00:11:10.780 So they can be validated in their sorrows and their they're feeling sorry for themselves.

00:11:17.420 It's the opposite of what we would teach our children.

00:11:22.040 Well, we ought to teach our children and the people we're dealing with.

00:11:26.380 Get these people.

00:11:27.400 Look, get these.

00:11:28.460 I'm not saying we need to just throw them to the wolves.

00:11:30.940 Get these people the mental health stuff they need, like the access to therapists.

00:11:35.760 And like I'm not saying we just abandon these individuals.

00:11:39.940 But look, if you're a woman and you're think you legitimately think you're a man, not like you're masculine or you're manly or you like things guys like that's different.

00:11:49.200 No.

00:11:49.300 But if you legitimately think that you're a man, there's something misfiring in your brain that needs to be addressed, not with reaffirming health care, quote unquote.

00:12:02.160 That's the euphemism.

00:12:03.000 But with therapy and the mental health that you need to say, no, you're not.

00:12:08.420 Let's help you learn how to be comfortable with who you really are, which is a woman or a man or, you know, or a fully abled body person.

00:12:19.300 Like, I can't.

00:12:21.480 I get so frustrated with this stuff.

00:12:23.160 It's asinine.

00:12:24.080 It's ridiculous.

00:12:24.780 And then just we – the amount of just placating we do to these people.

00:12:28.700 You know, everything's changed.

00:12:29.740 Everything – like you have to bend over backwards.

00:12:32.480 You can't say anything.

00:12:33.860 Heaven forbid you have a differing opinion than these people.

00:12:36.620 And, you know, the world just loses their mind because you say something.

00:12:40.080 It's ridiculous.

00:12:41.500 We need to speak out more against it so people are familiar with and comfortable with the idea that, hey, no, people are going to say something about it.

00:12:47.720 But, look, I'm going to say something even a little controversial.

00:12:51.500 Like, bullying, there's a big anti-bullying campaign.

00:12:56.360 Kip, when you and I grew up, bullying was taking place.

00:12:59.600 Now, look, there's a distinction between a little bit of peer pressure.

00:13:04.640 Like, hey, don't be weird.

00:13:06.160 Like, why would that be a human condition?

00:13:09.580 Why would people pick on weird people?

00:13:12.580 Because they're a threat to the culture.

00:13:15.000 Like, you need to conform to what we're doing here.

00:13:17.860 Right?

00:13:18.400 That's human nature.

00:13:20.320 And I'm not saying that we should go back to, like, bullying because the bullying now is different than the bullying then.

00:13:26.480 But a little bit of peer pressure and say, no, you're weird.

00:13:29.440 That's weird.

00:13:30.140 You're the weird guy.

00:13:31.180 I don't really see anything wrong with that.

00:13:33.260 I think probably more of us ought to say, nope, that's weird, not acceptable around us to straighten some of these people out.

00:13:40.460 Yeah, absolutely.

00:13:41.000 I can't help but think about one of my sons.

00:13:45.660 This is like, here's your call to action if your kids are in the public school system, by the way.

00:13:50.760 So one of my sons in high school, this is probably about three years ago.

00:13:54.900 Have you heard of this?

00:13:55.740 The furries or whatever?

00:13:58.640 Have you heard this?

00:13:59.260 Yes.

00:13:59.940 Yeah.

00:14:00.100 So another great example of what we're talking about.

00:14:02.760 Yeah.

00:14:02.880 These kids come to school and they identify it, like, as an animal.

00:14:08.620 And the teachers pander to it because they don't want to get in trouble.

00:14:12.800 I know.

00:14:13.360 It's crazy.

00:14:14.120 And they play along.

00:14:15.040 Like, I'm sorry, but if I'm at work or I'm in a school and one of the kids thinks he's a wolf, that's a problem.

00:14:25.200 Like, yeah, you're fired.

00:14:26.780 Yeah.

00:14:26.960 That's not normal.

00:14:28.940 It's not good for them.

00:14:31.220 Right.

00:14:32.000 But yet we pretend because we don't want to offend.

00:14:35.740 Are you joking?

00:14:38.980 This is more about you than it is them.

00:14:41.420 You want the best for a kid.

00:14:42.820 You don't pander to them pretending to be an animal.

00:14:46.420 You address the issue so they can show up powerfully in the world and be happy with who they are and realize their value is based upon how they show up in the world and not based upon pretending to be something that they're not.

00:15:02.100 That they don't need to pretend to be something to be recognized and appreciated.

00:15:06.640 You address the issue.

00:15:10.280 This is a crazy world, man.

00:15:11.740 I'm sorry.

00:15:13.340 Imagine.

00:15:13.940 Imagine this.

00:15:15.120 Imagine you're.

00:15:16.200 Oh, I know.

00:15:16.900 And I do, too.

00:15:17.420 Imagine your son comes to you and says, maybe it's your eight year old son.

00:15:20.880 And he says, hey, dad, I think I can fly.

00:15:23.040 And you're like, yeah, you probably can.

00:15:26.140 Why don't you go climb on the roof and jump off and show me?

00:15:29.300 I'm so excited to see it.

00:15:30.440 And you're all excited because you, too, think he can fly.

00:15:33.780 The kid jumps off the roof and does a faceplant into the ground and breaks his leg or his back or, heaven forbid, kills himself because you affirmed this stupid idea that a child had.

00:15:45.660 I mean, how many of us thought we could fly or dreamed of flying when we were little?

00:15:49.320 Totally.

00:15:49.680 It's not reality.

00:15:51.220 So let's operate in reality.

00:15:53.120 Now, there's some things that we can say, hey, you can be anything you want to be.

00:15:55.780 But that's a different conversation than, hey, you can fly like a bird.

00:15:59.360 Probably stay off the cliff and off the roof for a little while.

00:16:02.600 And this is mentally and here's here's the here's the rub.

00:16:05.840 This is mentally an unhealthy parents, because guess what?

00:16:10.680 You think you're special because you got a special kid and you've bought in to.

00:16:16.080 Oh, that's a good point.

00:16:16.840 You bought into the social construct that you're unique because you have a kid that's pretends to be a coyote.

00:16:23.620 Seriously.

00:16:24.900 That's interesting.

00:16:26.240 And you're never really considered that.

00:16:27.640 I just assumed it was weakness.

00:16:29.000 No, I think they're doing it because they they've latched on to it, that they're special because they have a special kid.

00:16:35.480 It's a good point.

00:16:36.060 Shame on you.

00:16:37.580 Shame on you.

00:16:39.900 All right.

00:16:40.440 Yeah, good point.

00:16:41.400 All right.

00:16:41.600 What's your headline?

00:16:42.620 Just to get us more riled up, man.

00:16:45.620 So go, man.

00:16:46.280 Let's get it done.

00:16:46.980 All right.

00:16:47.280 So here's my headline.

00:16:48.280 So this is actually this was probably about a week ago.

00:16:51.360 This happened.

00:16:52.140 So the view I don't watch the view.

00:16:54.320 I don't know why anybody would, because any any slight highlights I get of that show, I get I'm like, did someone really say that on there?

00:17:03.480 And they say some stupid stuff.

00:17:05.760 So the co-hosts were responding to a tick tock trend, asking women if they really need men.

00:17:12.340 Because men are useless, says the co-host, Anna.

00:17:18.340 I mean, by the way, I wanted to.

00:17:21.320 And then she says, I wanted to make a distinction between straight men and gay men.

00:17:25.080 Gay men.

00:17:26.240 She she would die without gay men in her life.

00:17:29.420 No one can gossip like a gay man.

00:17:31.520 No one can help you assessorize like a gay man.

00:17:34.620 And nobody can help you from doing harm to yourself like a gay man.

00:17:38.380 But straight men, on the other hand, are completely worthless.

00:17:42.680 One woman even said that if it wasn't for her, her husband would live in her filth without her constantly in his life.

00:17:50.620 One even went positive and talked about how her man she couldn't live without because he's a handyman.

00:17:56.860 And it was followed up with a comment of, well, that just sounds like a servant.

00:18:01.420 You could pretty much hire anybody to do that kind of stuff.

00:18:04.000 So here we have these overly feminist women saying, you know what?

00:18:10.060 Men are worthless.

00:18:11.280 We don't need men in this world.

00:18:13.600 And obviously, there's many ways that we could talk about this, like the polarization, the ignorance to things.

00:18:22.900 But most importantly, what what I felt, what gets me riled up is how if one of these women on this show, and I would even argue women in our lives, if they got caught saying, I need my husband.

00:18:41.240 I need a man in my life, that it would be met with like a little bit of an attack.

00:18:49.000 Oh, no, you don't.

00:18:50.200 You don't need men, right?

00:18:51.840 Like it's almost promoted from a social perspective that a woman can't say they actually need a man in their life.

00:19:00.680 And this is the drawback of the feminist movement.

00:19:04.780 Most men would never say this, by the way.

00:19:06.700 In fact, I should have had this prepared.

00:19:09.520 It just came to my mind.

00:19:10.480 But I read a study of the amount of men that say they need women versus women need men.

00:19:16.180 And guess what, ladies?

00:19:17.500 Most men say, absolutely, I need a woman in my life.

00:19:21.380 So they're appreciating you.

00:19:24.000 Meanwhile, you can pretend all you want that men are not needed.

00:19:28.280 And I almost think it's from this city perspective, right?

00:19:36.780 When we think of men as office workers only, and you're like, well, I could think.

00:19:41.140 And then they don't think about who's drilling oil, who's building buildings, who's going to war.

00:19:47.460 All these things that women absolutely choose not to do, and in many cases, would be incapable of doing.

00:19:57.600 But we're going to ignore all those things because men are worthless.

00:20:01.720 There you go.

00:20:02.480 I just, it drives me mad.

00:20:05.920 I mean, look, the only thing that crosses my mind is, surprise, surprise, despicable women can't find good men for them to be around.

00:20:14.660 And, like, that's all I can think about is, like, why is it that the disgusting ones, like the gross ones, the vile ones, like, why is it that those are always the ones who are like, men are horrible?

00:20:27.280 But then on the other hand, you take wholesome, attractive, smart, intelligent, nurturing, kind, caring, empathetic women, and they're like, I love men.

00:20:36.460 Hmm.

00:20:36.980 I wonder what the difference is.

00:20:37.800 I wonder what the difference could be.

00:20:39.600 Yeah.

00:20:40.660 Yeah.

00:20:40.840 You know, it's like feminism is disgusting.

00:20:43.480 I mean, it really is.

00:20:45.720 It ruins beautiful women.

00:20:47.820 And I'm not just talking about physical looks.

00:20:50.600 I'm talking about their soul.

00:20:53.280 It steals their soul.

00:20:55.240 It makes them vile.

00:20:58.080 It hardens them against the world and against other people.

00:21:02.040 It paints themselves as the victim.

00:21:04.640 It's a despicable, despicable ideology.

00:21:07.280 Yeah.

00:21:08.300 That should not be confused with, hey, we need to treat women with respect and kindness, and they can be partners with us as men.

00:21:16.840 I don't say women and men are equal.

00:21:18.360 We're not.

00:21:18.980 Clearly, we're different.

00:21:20.880 Women are good at certain things that men aren't generally good at, and men are good at other things that women generally aren't as good at.

00:21:27.040 So we're not equal, but in worth, yes, absolutely.

00:21:32.860 But, yeah, I'm not impressed by a bunch of hideous, despicable women confused as to why they can't find men worth having around.

00:21:41.800 Why would a man subject himself to that?

00:21:44.840 Yeah.

00:21:45.020 Of course he wouldn't.

00:21:46.680 So if there's a woman who's listening and she's buying into this feminine ideology, just know you're going to die alone and miserable because no man wants to spend any amount of time with you, and rightfully so.

00:21:56.940 I wouldn't.

00:21:57.560 You wouldn't, Kip?

00:21:58.340 No.

00:21:58.740 Of course not.

00:21:59.420 No.

00:22:00.380 But beautiful, lovely women who are kind and empathetic and caring and smart and intelligent, that's the kind of person I want to partner with.

00:22:09.760 My girlfriend is one of those people.

00:22:11.760 I want to be around her.

00:22:13.260 I want to spend time with her.

00:22:15.020 Even if we're doing nothing, I enjoy it.

00:22:17.640 I enjoy serving her in ways, and she feels the same, I think, towards me.

00:22:22.500 So this is not complicated or confusing.

00:22:26.060 Women, do not buy into this feminine ideology.

00:22:28.740 It's destructive, dangerous, and it leads you to a path of loneliness and despair.

00:22:37.000 Yeah, totally.

00:22:38.280 And don't worry.

00:22:39.460 If you choose to follow, you'll get support.

00:22:41.680 There's plenty of support telling you that you're fulfilling.

00:22:44.900 From other despicable women.

00:22:46.680 Exactly.

00:22:47.260 They'll support you in your quest of mediocre lack of fulfillment in your life and loneliness.

00:22:55.740 Absolutely.

00:22:56.140 Yep.

00:22:58.580 Yeah.

00:22:58.920 Yep.

00:23:00.480 All right, man.

00:23:01.360 Well, good headlines.

00:23:02.780 If you guys have any other headlines you want us to address, let us know.

00:23:06.100 For now, let's get to some questions today.

00:23:08.080 Yeah.

00:23:08.300 So we have some questions from Instagram as well as the Foundry.

00:23:11.400 I'll just kind of be jumping in between all of those.

00:23:14.100 So Jared Jones, I know a guy who was always anxious about everything.

00:23:19.060 And this is actually perfect because I kind of, I feel anxious now.

00:23:23.000 Kind of riled up around everything.

00:23:26.760 The state of the country, the world in general, natural disasters, the eclipse, women, you name it.

00:23:33.280 It's something that he's either anxious or angry about.

00:23:36.580 I've tried to talk to him about it, but I also try to maintain my distance.

00:23:40.560 I don't want all of the negativity.

00:23:42.480 With the amount of anxious, angry, and negative people in the world, it's impossible to avoid them.

00:23:47.000 But you have to protect yourself and your mindset.

00:23:49.840 How do you maintain a safe distance while still trying to influence positive change among the people in the communities you are surrounded by every day?

00:24:00.400 You'd show up within the controllables.

00:24:02.500 That's all you can do.

00:24:03.280 So anxiety is fret over something that has not happened yet, right?

00:24:07.220 You're anxious about women, I think he said, because maybe he doesn't know how to approach women.

00:24:13.380 He's anxious about the economy or the political landscape because he doesn't know how that will affect his business.

00:24:20.020 So it's just fret and worry and concern over something that may or may not happen.

00:24:25.300 It's the future.

00:24:26.140 And I think we ought to be familiar with the future, at least aware of what could potentially happen.

00:24:30.740 But the antidote to anxiety is action.

00:24:33.240 So if you have a lot of anxiety towards the opposite sex, then you need to put yourself in environments where you're spending more time with the opposite sex.

00:24:44.380 That could be talking to the woman at the grocery store who's checking you out for your groceries.

00:24:50.860 It could be the woman at the office who works in the office next to you or the cubicle next to you.

00:24:57.320 And it's not romantic necessarily.

00:25:00.000 You might not have any interest, but you're just familiarizing yourself with talking with women.

00:25:04.320 If you're worried about the economy, then the best thing that you can do is to get your financial house in order.

00:25:09.760 You know, pay off your debt, learn marketable skills, ask for promotion, start a new business, save some money, learn how to invest.

00:25:17.400 If you're worried about natural disasters, then the antidote to that is having food storage, having supplies, having skills that you could use and utilize should you need to.

00:25:29.860 So the antidote, again, to anxiety is always action.

00:25:32.420 It can be taken to the extreme.

00:25:34.180 And you can see that when your action comes at the expense of other avenues of your life.

00:25:39.080 For example, I have somebody in my life, was in my life, who really got hardcore into prepping.

00:25:46.620 I mean hardcore, went down the rabbit hole of prepping, and he ended up losing his job and his family because of it.

00:25:54.500 That's obviously a very shortened version, but he got so immersed into prepping that he lost the things that are most important to him.

00:26:01.480 That's a problem.

00:26:02.460 That's no longer what I would say healthy action that's being obsessed, and that needs to be addressed mentally.

00:26:11.080 There's something going on, and that needs to be addressed probably with a professional in that case.

00:26:16.640 Now, to your question, what do you do?

00:26:19.880 Well, you just focus on the controllables.

00:26:21.460 So if you're worried about how our young children are being raised and growing up, then the antidote to that is get involved in a young men's program.

00:26:30.900 Get involved in sports in your community and coach sports teams.

00:26:35.480 Maybe there's some extracurricular activities through the school district that you can be involved in.

00:26:40.200 Maybe you want to be a part-time substitute teacher, or you want to coach one of the teams at the high school,

00:26:45.840 or you want to do some mentoring through YMCA or Big Brothers, Big Sisters type programs.

00:26:51.340 There are so many options available that allow you to be immersed in the solution to the problem that you see without having to be – it rub off on you.

00:27:02.380 You're going to feel good.

00:27:03.400 I know I feel good.

00:27:04.380 I'm coaching my son's soccer team.

00:27:07.720 Man, I feel really good.

00:27:09.600 I'll give you a small example.

00:27:11.160 And it doesn't seem like a big deal, but I assure you it is.

00:27:15.600 One of our kids, when we were playing soccer last weekend, he got kicked in the face with the ball.

00:27:21.300 Either he got kicked in the face or he fell and hit his face.

00:27:23.760 I didn't see it.

00:27:24.800 But he was crying.

00:27:25.800 He's one of our best players.

00:27:27.460 Yeah, maybe both.

00:27:28.400 One of our best players.

00:27:30.340 And he was like – he could tell.

00:27:32.480 He was trying to tough it out.

00:27:33.480 I could tell because he's a tough kid, and he's really athletic.

00:27:36.880 I'm like, come over here, bud.

00:27:38.000 So I had him come over, and I just, like, put my arms around him.

00:27:42.880 I'm like, are you okay, man?

00:27:44.040 Like, I just kind of wrapped him up.

00:27:45.440 I'm like, are you good?

00:27:46.060 He's like, that hurt.

00:27:47.220 I'm like, I know it hurt.

00:27:48.200 I know.

00:27:48.940 I said, way to keep going, though.

00:27:50.440 You didn't stop.

00:27:51.800 Like, you waited for a time to address it, but in the moment, you just kept going.

00:27:56.860 I'm really proud of you.

00:27:58.600 And then I said, why don't you just sit down for a minute, recover.

00:28:01.180 And he's like, I want to play.

00:28:02.280 I said, I know you want to play, and I'm going to put you back in.

00:28:04.320 I just need you to recover for a minute, and then I'm going to put you back in.

00:28:07.460 I appreciate your toughness.

00:28:09.020 So he sat down.

00:28:09.980 He got a drink.

00:28:10.600 He was out for a minute or two, and I put him back in the game, no problem.

00:28:14.840 Little teeny moments.

00:28:17.060 How would somebody else handle that?

00:28:19.720 You know, if we're looking at the doctrine of popular culture, it's like, here, come here.

00:28:23.980 Like, you don't have to play the rest of the season, and let me wipe your nose off for you,

00:28:28.020 and wipe your tears down.

00:28:30.040 And yeah, yeah, exactly.

00:28:32.400 Right?

00:28:32.700 But that's not what's going to help this young man.

00:28:35.060 What's going to help this young man is acknowledging that he did good in the moment, acknowledging

00:28:39.280 that he's hurt, making sure he's not injured, and then get his ass back in the game where

00:28:44.640 he belongs and where he wants to be.

00:28:46.680 There are so many opportunities for that.

00:28:49.020 And what you have to do is focus on the controllables.

00:28:53.800 When you start focusing and pouring a lot of time and energy into resources into the uncontrollables

00:28:58.940 is where you start running into issues.

00:29:01.560 If you're neglecting, for example, your own kids because you're pouring so heavily into

00:29:06.840 this guy because you don't want him to fail, that's your problem.

00:29:11.280 Yeah.

00:29:11.520 And it will be your kids' problem.

00:29:14.120 Because you can't control that, but you can't control dinner at the table with your kids

00:29:17.980 for the most part.

00:29:20.020 Yeah.

00:29:20.420 So focus on the things and go back and listen to the Friday field notes that I just did called

00:29:25.220 when society is failing around you, you know, focus on your own.

00:29:30.160 I'm paraphrasing, but focus on your own.

00:29:32.640 Because I talk about the exact strategies that you can use when you see the decimation

00:29:37.240 and degradation of society around you.

00:29:39.400 Yeah.

00:29:39.920 You know, one thought for you, Jared, you know, that I heard in your question a little bit

00:29:44.340 is he's around a guy, right, that's anxious and he's stressed out in this kind of safe distance

00:29:50.420 with him, right, to maintain a positive influence, but he also probably wants to be around this

00:29:57.520 individual.

00:29:58.620 I have a couple of people like this in my life that are very anxious and riled up.

00:30:04.380 I just get curious.

00:30:07.320 Remove the judgment in what he's talking about all the time and just listen and see the humanity

00:30:13.500 and what they're talking about and try to understand like, oh, interesting, that gets him so riled up.

00:30:19.420 Why is that, Ryan?

00:30:21.380 Why does that piss you off so much?

00:30:22.920 Oh, because of this.

00:30:23.780 I'm like, interesting.

00:30:25.240 And just see what's happening.

00:30:27.800 I think we get latched into negativeness and anxiety when we're judging it, right?

00:30:33.740 We're like, oh, no, I disagree.

00:30:36.180 It's like, just be curious and just consider, listen, try to see, understand.

00:30:43.500 What they're doing or what they're thinking without the judgment of right and wrong.

00:30:49.180 And it's almost a superpower, I think.

00:30:52.160 Like, it has really allowed me to be around people.

00:30:55.960 They see things politically different and they could be socially charged and I'm just listening.

00:31:02.020 And I don't even need to speak my opinion and disagree.

00:31:05.320 No, I'm just curious because I'm content, right?

00:31:09.580 And I'm just listening and understanding humans and the condition and what it means to be a human and add meaning to every damn thing.

00:31:17.060 And then when they get emotional, you're like, oh, interesting.

00:31:20.380 What is it about that that makes them angry?

00:31:24.860 What does that mean about them?

00:31:26.720 Interesting, right?

00:31:27.960 And just listen.

00:31:28.800 Be curious.

00:31:29.800 It's almost a superpower.

00:31:31.100 It allows you to listen to anybody talking about anything and not get riled up.

00:31:36.460 It's fascinating.

00:31:37.120 I think that's why this podcast between you and I is so good because you're way more empathetic.

00:31:42.160 If my buddies start doing that, I'm like, shut the hell up.

00:31:45.020 Like, I don't even want to hear it anymore.

00:31:48.000 I got enough of my own problems.

00:31:50.300 Like, toughen up.

00:31:51.300 It's not even a big deal.

00:31:52.560 So, and maybe the world needs both, but I do appreciate your perspective on it.

00:31:58.980 Yeah, and sometimes I just need to say, shut up, right?

00:32:02.220 So.

00:32:02.820 Yep, exactly.

00:32:04.020 All right.

00:32:04.600 White Eagle 101, conversation on meaning and creating a team for business and life.

00:32:10.620 So he wants us to talk about creating a team for business and life when you're used to solo success.

00:32:18.560 You say you're used to solo success, but you're actually not.

00:32:26.000 There's no success in a vacuum.

00:32:29.380 Like, you might be attributing it to being solo, but that's not really what's happening.

00:32:37.600 That's a really good point.

00:32:38.640 Like, look at your marriage.

00:32:41.460 What?

00:32:41.880 You're saying that you have a thriving marriage because you're really great and she's not?

00:32:45.040 Or in business?

00:32:47.920 You know, maybe you're, okay, so here's a great example.

00:32:50.680 I work primarily by myself.

00:32:52.200 I'm here in my house 90% of the time by myself, like, doing my thing.

00:32:57.480 But I'm not solo.

00:32:59.220 I've got you.

00:33:00.520 I've got other people.

00:33:01.680 I've got projects and events and partners and I've got clients, guys in the Iron Council.

00:33:06.880 Like, none of this would happen without you and everybody else who I just listed.

00:33:11.020 So, I think that you're misattributing your success to this lone wolf mentality and it's just not reality.

00:33:19.380 So, imagine this.

00:33:21.580 Imagine if instead of attributing it to being solo, you started to acknowledge the partners that you have in life, both personally and professionally.

00:33:28.780 And instead of thinking that you're better off alone, you started magnifying the relationships and became more intentional about who exactly you wanted to partner with.

00:33:38.760 Now, all of a sudden, how much better is your marriage because you're not just operating by default, but you're very deliberate and intentional about understanding what makes her tick and what are her strengths?

00:33:52.180 What are her weaknesses?

00:33:53.620 What do you bring to the table?

00:33:55.120 How can you serve her?

00:33:56.540 How can you help her get what she wants?

00:33:58.580 How can she help you get what you want?

00:34:00.360 Imagine in your business, instead of just worrying about, oh, I picked up a new client today, you started getting intentional about what kind of clients, what exact problems are they dealing with?

00:34:12.360 What exact solutions can you offer?

00:34:14.840 What kind of language should you use to be attractive to those people so you can solve their problems with your product?

00:34:22.500 Imagine at work, maybe you're an employee or even the boss or the owner and you start looking at your colleagues and your coworkers

00:34:29.520 and you think, man, that guy's really good at X, Y, and Z.

00:34:32.980 I think I need to shift him to a different position.

00:34:36.840 And that person's really good at this, but they're falling behind on this and I really needed to do that.

00:34:40.820 So I'm going to pour a little bit more time and energy into helping them figure that element out.

00:34:46.480 And then you start putting everything on hyperdrive because right now it's happening, but you're not even acknowledging that it's happening.

00:34:53.160 Imagine what it would be like if you did acknowledge it and then you can figure out what partners you need professionally and personally.

00:34:58.860 I love that.

00:35:00.540 Is there, when you look at creating a team, you in particular, what traits are you looking for?

00:35:07.860 What's the ideal team player for you when you think about it, a team from a business perspective?

00:35:16.320 I mean a lot.

00:35:17.320 I'm not going to say these necessarily in any order and this is, I'm just shooting off the hip a little bit here.

00:35:22.320 But capability is one.

00:35:25.580 Is this somebody who's capable of what I need?

00:35:30.580 And by the way, that's personal and professional.

00:35:33.000 Yeah.

00:35:34.220 You know, like I want a partner who's capable of providing what I need and I want to be a kind of partner that is capable of providing what she needs.

00:35:41.600 But then professionally, you know, is this somebody who has the skill set required to achieve in what I'm doing?

00:35:48.260 That's one.

00:35:50.880 Loyalty, I think, is important.

00:35:53.120 Is this, and I'm not asking for blind allegiance forever, but I'm asking for some loyalty.

00:35:58.780 I'm asking for somebody who believes enough in me and what I'm doing that they're going to stick around.

00:36:02.700 If things aren't always perfect, if things aren't always right, that they're willing to afford me some grace because they're loyal to me and or the mission.

00:36:11.660 I think I'm always interested in somebody who's a team player, who doesn't operate on an island, who doesn't think that they're better, who really values the contributing elements from other people.

00:36:23.960 And then I think probably being a solid communicator is becoming more and more important to me.

00:36:33.780 It's the conduit.

00:36:34.460 Can this person communicate?

00:36:37.140 And it's not even just communicate all the good.

00:36:40.060 But I actually need people in my life, again, personally and professionally, who are willing to tell me the truth about what they're feeling, what they want, what their hopes and dreams are, what I might be doing that they don't like.

00:36:55.860 Like, I need all of it.

00:36:57.440 And it's not always comfortable, but I really, really value a person's ability to communicate everything they may need to communicate, not just the rainbows and the sunshine, but the clouds and the darkness as well.

00:37:09.340 Yeah, I like it.

00:37:12.580 An additional resource, there's a book, The Ideal Team Player.

00:37:16.200 I don't know who the author is off target.

00:37:18.940 In summary, hungry, humble, smart, and care.

00:37:26.520 Someone that's hungry, they're humble, they're smart, and they care.

00:37:30.160 That's the premise of that book, another resource for you to look at.

00:37:35.200 All right.

00:37:35.440 I like that.

00:37:35.860 Dave Berg, advice for fathers expecting a third son.

00:37:41.220 And maybe this is just advice for fathers expecting a son.

00:37:44.380 I'm not sure if it changes once there's a third, other than you know more, but.

00:37:50.480 Probably learn the lessons that you messed up on your first and second son.

00:37:54.160 Don't do that.

00:37:56.480 Totally.

00:37:56.840 And just when you think you have it figured out, then your third son's going to be the rebel, especially if he's the last.

00:38:03.800 I don't know.

00:38:04.480 I don't know if this is your last, but if he is, you're in for a wild ride.

00:38:08.520 It's going to be fun, and it's going to be miserable.

00:38:11.040 But, oh my goodness, the youngest, right?

00:38:14.300 Would you agree with that?

00:38:15.020 The youngest?

00:38:16.120 Yeah.

00:38:16.340 I have a feeling he's going to give us a run for our money.

00:38:21.760 I think it's, I honestly think this is God's trick.

00:38:25.880 Because generally, the first kid's usually the best.

00:38:29.060 Like the well-behaved, they've got good manners, you know, they're ambitious.

00:38:33.560 Not always, but generally.

00:38:34.940 Yeah.

00:38:35.460 And God's like, well, I want this person to have, I want these two people to have more kids, so I better give them a good one.

00:38:41.360 And then when you know you're done, God's like, all right, I'll get rid of like the other souls that I need to get rid of.

00:38:47.380 Because these guys are done anyway, so I can just dump this one on this family.

00:38:55.180 That's funny.

00:38:55.880 But you love them.

00:38:57.600 You love them.

00:38:58.300 But, oh my goodness.

00:38:59.220 I don't know.

00:38:59.620 Look, here's what I would say on a more genuine answer for you is some things I'm learning.

00:39:09.340 Appreciate what they appreciate.

00:39:12.200 Like they may not, and you're probably learning this where you already have two boys.

00:39:16.900 They may not always be interested in the same things that you are.

00:39:21.120 And that's okay.

00:39:22.100 Meet them where they are.

00:39:23.460 You know, if they don't like the same sports or even sports at all, and they like technology and video game, that's okay.

00:39:33.280 Within reason, you know, that's okay.

00:39:34.740 Like what can you do to be involved in that world to help them develop and cultivate their skill set?

00:39:39.620 I think that's important.

00:39:42.620 Another thing is just spending time with them.

00:39:47.840 You know, it's hard.

00:39:49.740 The more kids you have, the harder it becomes to spend time with them.

00:39:54.000 And what I'm learning, because my oldest is 16 now, I really only have about two years of any measurable time with him.

00:40:00.880 Maybe even less, because he's got prom this weekend, and he's dating and working, and he's in sports.

00:40:06.600 And so, like, I very rarely see him.

00:40:08.340 And it's okay.

00:40:08.880 This is the natural order of things.

00:40:10.200 We have a good relationship, and I make time to see him.

00:40:13.740 But I've really enjoyed spending more time with my younger two lately because I see that my older boys are moving on.

00:40:24.180 But also, I see that my younger kids need me, too.

00:40:28.760 So, I think making sure you carve out dedicated time for them where it's not like, hey, the three boys are going to go out.

00:40:35.580 No, it might just be you and him go out and do things together alone, just you guys.

00:40:41.240 Because that alone time, even, like, with my daughter, one thing I do every Saturday is I go on a donut run in the morning.

00:40:47.840 And sometimes the other boys will ask, can we go?

00:40:50.500 No, you can't.

00:40:52.640 We'll get you a donut, but this is for me and her, like, nobody else.

00:40:56.340 And when we get in the truck, she's like, hey, can I listen to my playlist?

00:40:59.480 I hate her playlist.

00:41:01.340 It's like my ears bleed when she puts her playlist on.

00:41:04.300 And Katy Perry and Taylor Swift and all these other little teeny bopper singers.

00:41:10.560 I hate it, but that's what she wants to listen to.

00:41:12.620 And if that's what it takes for her to enjoy the 20 minutes it takes us to get donuts and come back, then that's what I'm going to do.

00:41:19.760 So, carving out dedicated time for my younger children has been invaluable when I do it.

00:41:24.640 I wish I was better.

00:41:25.660 I'm not always great at it, but it is a valuable thing to do.

00:41:29.640 I think that's spot on.

00:41:30.680 All right, this might need some context from you.

00:41:34.280 So, Michael Graham, thoughts on the T-shirt selling talking heads?

00:41:39.500 Do you believe they care or are they just after a quick buck?

00:41:46.380 I don't really know, like, what you mean, who, like, who, am I one of, I sell T-shirts, so am I one of those people?

00:41:53.700 Like, I don't really know where the line is on that.

00:41:56.400 Who exactly he's implying, but I'm assuming just maybe just influencers, right, that are maybe not giving the best advice and maybe their focus is really just making money.

00:42:09.860 It could be.

00:42:13.300 You're never going to know that, though.

00:42:15.180 We can't know that.

00:42:16.220 So, what I would suggest is just support the companies that you like.

00:42:20.920 You know, if there's a, so, for example, well, I'll just use us as an example and I'll try to sell some T-shirts while I do this.

00:42:29.200 Talking head.

00:42:29.740 Let's say, let's say that you really like our movement.

00:42:34.400 You resonate with what we're doing.

00:42:35.900 You support what we're doing.

00:42:37.540 You believe in what we're doing.

00:42:39.440 And we offer T-shirts and you pay $25 for a T-shirt because maybe you like it.

00:42:44.200 Maybe you don't even like it.

00:42:44.940 You just want to support.

00:42:46.300 What a lot of people fail to realize, I'm going to pull back the curtain here a little bit.

00:42:50.420 Believe it or not, even though this is a movement I believe in, it's also a business.

00:42:54.200 And it costs money to invest in camera equipment and lights and reoccurring technology charges like email lists and updating websites and running events and the maintenance behind our brotherhood, the Iron Council.

00:43:11.860 It costs money.

00:43:13.740 I had a guy email me the other day and he was like, hey, so I'm thinking about joining the Iron Council, but I just want to know what my money would go to.

00:43:21.660 My back pocket.

00:43:22.920 It goes to the business.

00:43:24.200 And then it goes to me.

00:43:27.220 Why is that so weird?

00:43:28.080 I've had people ask that.

00:43:29.040 It's confusing to me.

00:43:30.560 Where does the money go when people pay for your products and services?

00:43:34.600 Nobody asks that in other businesses, but in these kind of businesses, they do.

00:43:39.000 Because a lot of the times people believe that, oh, if it's a mission, it's a movement, then you ought to just be doing it out of the goodness of your heart.

00:43:46.040 Well, I think both can exist.

00:43:47.420 You can do it out of the goodness of your heart and truly believe that you're touching people and changing their lives.

00:43:53.340 And also you can run a very lucrative, profitable business, which is what we're attempting to do.

00:43:59.620 So what I would say is if there's an organization or a movement or an individual you like, throw a couple bucks at them.

00:44:10.760 If they're selling a t-shirt and you like the t-shirt, buy the t-shirt because they'll be able to keep doing what they're doing.

00:44:18.620 They'll put food on their table.

00:44:19.680 They'll buy some groceries.

00:44:22.040 They'll put a roof over their kids' head.

00:44:23.520 Like, it's fine.

00:44:24.760 And if you think that they're just out to sell t-shirts, and there are people like that who are going to run with a mission.

00:44:31.060 You see it a lot in politics.

00:44:32.120 There's a lot of like political talking heads.

00:44:35.700 And then they, you could tell they're doing it because it almost doesn't align.

00:44:40.980 Right?

00:44:41.400 It's like they might have this mission that they're going to share about who knows what, fitness, for example.

00:44:46.200 And then all of a sudden they're selling memberships or gift cards to McDonald's.

00:44:51.000 It's like, okay, you don't, there's a disconnect here.

00:44:56.620 And like, it's, it's crazy.

00:44:58.900 I see that a lot in the health arena.

00:45:00.280 Like I've seen people who, who have built livelihoods on being healthy, whether it's athletes, you know, health professionals.

00:45:08.440 And then they're selling, I saw this with Conor McGregor years ago.

00:45:12.300 Like he was selling Burger King stuff.

00:45:17.040 Are you telling me that Conor McGregor in his prime of fighting was eating at Burger King?

00:45:21.320 Like, get out of here.

00:45:23.580 This is, this is crazy.

00:45:25.220 And that's how, you know, it's phony.

00:45:27.680 But when the thing that they're offering is aligned with their service, then I think that gives you a little bit of a litmus.

00:45:35.860 One more example and then we'll move on because I don't want to beat a dead horse on this.

00:45:38.760 When I started the podcast, I had random podcast sponsors and there were two or three things that I was selling through sponsorships, advertising mostly.

00:45:50.300 Sponsorships is a little different, but advertising.

00:45:52.660 It was men's underwear.

00:45:55.440 Yep.

00:45:55.780 I remember.

00:45:57.000 Mattresses and business software.

00:45:59.500 And I didn't use any of it.

00:46:01.140 Yeah.

00:46:01.360 I remember the business software.

00:46:02.480 Cause I didn't, I don't care.

00:46:04.780 I don't, I don't care about it.

00:46:06.060 Like the business software, the NetSuite, I did use that a little bit actually.

00:46:09.900 Yeah.

00:46:10.180 But the others, I'm like, I don't care what mattress you sleep on.

00:46:12.780 I don't care what kind of underwear you wear.

00:46:14.340 Like I zero care in the world about that.

00:46:17.520 But now if you look at our sponsors, we've got Montana Knife Company.

00:46:23.820 I, I use their knives.

00:46:25.660 I use them every day in the kitchen.

00:46:27.240 I use them when I go hunt.

00:46:29.200 I think a man needs to have a knife.

00:46:31.000 I think having a good knife is a tool that men should have.

00:46:34.360 I believe in that company.

00:46:35.520 I support them.

00:46:36.700 I've been up to their place.

00:46:38.400 M42 Adventures is a company that I helped start to get men introduced and women to the

00:46:43.560 outdoors the way that I was.

00:46:46.700 It's more aligned.

00:46:48.060 So I'm still, yes, making money, but it's aligned with what we're doing.

00:46:51.080 And I think that's a pretty good litmus test.

00:46:52.980 Absolutely.

00:46:54.380 Bryce MDC, is Brazilian Jiu Jitsu really effective in real life situations or does the other person

00:47:03.060 have to play along?

00:47:05.520 Um, I'm going to think, let me think about this here for a second because I've, you hear

00:47:12.280 this question a lot, right?

00:47:13.900 The answer, the answer, the answer is a question and nobody asked this question.

00:47:19.580 They always defend their martial art.

00:47:21.480 Oh, it's the best because no, here's what I would say compared to what?

00:47:30.160 Right.

00:47:30.560 So if I get, if I'm at the bar or, or out at a sporting event and a guy's drunk and starts

00:47:40.060 harassing me or my girlfriend, am I going to like roll on my back and try to like arm

00:47:45.660 bar him?

00:47:46.420 Probably not.

00:47:47.260 I think I'd probably just hopefully just disengage.

00:47:50.880 He's a drunk son of a bitch.

00:47:52.340 And just like, he's just looking for a fight and I'm not interested in putting myself or

00:47:55.780 my girlfriend in harm's way in that moment.

00:47:58.120 Um, so I think you have to, or, or alternatively, let's say a guy actually gets physical with

00:48:04.920 you and you don't know how to do anything.

00:48:07.220 Is jujitsu better than not knowing how to do anything?

00:48:09.900 Yeah.

00:48:10.320 So it just really depends on the situations now from a practical standpoint.

00:48:17.700 Of course, of course it's effective.

00:48:21.560 If the guy grabs a gun, no, if he has a knife, probably at some serious risk, right?

00:48:28.220 If you're trying to choke a guy out and he grabs a knife out of his pocket, he's going

00:48:31.560 to stab you in the face.

00:48:33.100 Yeah.

00:48:35.580 So you're just trying to, I watched a guy, two guys get in an altercation.

00:48:39.600 It was a surveillance video in a, uh, in a garage, a parking garage.

00:48:44.040 And the guys kind of got into an altercation.

00:48:47.460 And one of the guys obviously trained jujitsu, put the guy in an arm bar, guy grabs a knife,

00:48:52.940 he's getting his arm broken, takes it, stabs him three or four times, kills him.

00:48:58.340 I'm not interested in arm barring a guy.

00:49:00.360 I'm interested in subduing somebody quickly and then getting myself out of the environment.

00:49:05.660 That's what I think jujitsu is valuable for.

00:49:08.100 And that's why I want to hear from you.

00:49:09.740 Cause it's a little bit different in what I think is more termed combat jujitsu or strikes

00:49:15.120 and different scenarios get thrown in, which I think there's some value to that as well.

00:49:18.300 I mean, and absolutely.

00:49:19.660 Like you could even say, you know, I, I go to a school that's a comp team.

00:49:25.300 We're training in gi only.

00:49:28.100 We're not talking about the self-defense aspects of jujitsu.

00:49:32.900 And is that guy going to be as effective as a school or an individual or a practitioner

00:49:38.460 that's intentionally thinking about jujitsu in a self-defense that even changes things.

00:49:44.780 The best example that I've heard is this.

00:49:48.520 The best self self-defense is remove yourself from the situation.

00:49:51.940 Always.

00:49:53.220 It doesn't matter what it is.

00:49:55.280 And when you can't remove yourself, when is that?

00:49:58.780 When they hold you, that's it, right?

00:50:03.440 If you and I square off, I can still walk away.

00:50:06.300 The only time I can't walk away is when I'm being held and controlled, which means that

00:50:13.180 you and I are now close quarters, which now jujitsu becomes a benefit.

00:50:19.540 So self-defense number one is check your ego, walk away, period.

00:50:24.940 Always.

00:50:25.580 Right.

00:50:25.980 And when you can't get away, now jujitsu is highly effective from that perspective because

00:50:31.500 well, you can't run, you can't remove yourself.

00:50:34.320 You have to deal with the circumstance and they have hands on you and you can't move.

00:50:40.700 Works really great from that perspective.

00:50:44.960 And I would say, Kip, you correct me if I'm wrong because you're more immersed in this

00:50:48.420 than I am.

00:50:48.940 It works great to either incapacitate somebody.

00:50:53.280 Like I don't want to break your arm, Kip.

00:50:54.880 Absolutely not.

00:50:55.500 In a fight.

00:50:56.180 I want you to pass out.

00:50:57.980 I want you to hit your head on my fist or the ground or I want you to pass out.

00:51:02.000 I'm not interested in breaking your foot.

00:51:04.200 Absolutely.

00:51:04.760 I'm not interested in breaking your arm.

00:51:06.300 Well, with adrenaline, people drinking, everything else.

00:51:09.720 Absolutely.

00:51:10.320 There's only one submission that is valuable in a self-defense perspective, in my opinion,

00:51:16.020 and that's a choke.

00:51:17.640 That is to make them unconscious so you can walk away safely.

00:51:21.560 That's it.

00:51:22.120 I would never go for anything other than a choke in a self-defense perspective.

00:51:28.240 Right.

00:51:28.680 Yeah, so I think that's important.

00:51:31.560 But I also think it's important, and maybe I'm being a little hypocritical.

00:51:36.020 I'm not being hypocritical.

00:51:37.160 I see the value in it, but I haven't done this yet.

00:51:39.640 Some striking.

00:51:40.340 I think to know some striking.

00:51:42.720 And I would say striking defense is probably better than knowing strike.

00:51:47.840 Because if I can defend against you striking at me and close ground and get you on the ground,

00:51:53.080 I'd probably win that battle just based on the statistics of how many people train relative

00:51:57.460 to who doesn't.

00:51:59.000 But if you hit me with a haymaker and I hit my head on your fist or the ground, I'm in

00:52:04.780 serious trouble.

00:52:05.920 Yeah.

00:52:06.680 Yeah.

00:52:07.240 And that's the scenario, right?

00:52:08.880 Haymaker means what?

00:52:10.460 That I can still walk away.

00:52:13.360 Right.

00:52:13.940 Right?

00:52:14.240 Or getting sucker punched.

00:52:16.840 You're in an altercation.

00:52:17.860 The guy's buddy comes out of the bar and hits you with his fist from the side.

00:52:23.360 You don't even see it.

00:52:24.160 Like, there's so many threats available.

00:52:26.260 Well, Kip, what would you say as far as, just in the spirit of the question, would you

00:52:30.980 say gi or no gi is generally better if you were to translate it to being in an altercation

00:52:39.020 in the street?

00:52:40.620 I think no gi at first, like surface level, but there are complexities that come with

00:52:50.360 the gi that will benefit your no gi.

00:52:52.860 I'm this huge believer that they both benefit each other because in no gi, you're all rash

00:52:58.420 guards.

00:52:59.680 No one can hold on to anything.

00:53:01.460 And then all of a sudden you get in a gi and someone can pin you and you can't move.

00:53:06.460 Can't move.

00:53:07.380 You have a jacket on, someone's going to pin you fairly well, right?

00:53:10.360 So I think both you need to deal with no gi probably represents it a little bit better

00:53:16.340 than gi, but I think I would always train both.

00:53:19.760 The other thing that, that crosses my mind or that I wanted to share to your point is

00:53:24.520 whenever we had Jason, I haven't been part of very many fight camps for, for very many

00:53:31.480 MMA fighters.

00:53:32.340 One particular fighter that I've always been part of his fight camp for the most part is

00:53:36.720 Jason South.

00:53:37.600 He had like a 10 and 0 record, solid fighter.

00:53:40.660 We would shark tank him four ounce gloves and we would strike and we do jujitsu and man,

00:53:49.320 nothing checks the pureness of your jujitsu as when someone can tee off on your face.

00:53:55.540 It changes everything.

00:53:58.980 And it's so valuable.

00:54:00.780 It was so enlightening.

00:54:02.380 Like I had these moves that are like, oh, this is my move.

00:54:05.800 And I like realized, yeah, that's not going to work.

00:54:09.580 I can't do that move with someone striking me or I got to be in or I have to be out.

00:54:15.880 I can't rest in certain areas.

00:54:18.880 If I rest it, I get hammer fisted to the face.

00:54:21.440 And so if you're training, dude, just get a couple of guys in the gym.

00:54:26.180 Everyone agree.

00:54:27.500 Fridays at noon, we're all wearing four ounce gloves and we're at least tapping each other

00:54:32.680 in the face.

00:54:34.500 As part of our training, it, it will enlighten and make your jujitsu so much more pure.

00:54:40.900 It really will.

00:54:42.600 Yeah, I, I agree.

00:54:44.220 I, I train primarily gi, but I would agree with you that you're going to be, I'll say

00:54:51.080 it this way.

00:54:51.840 You'll be better at no gi if you train, excuse me, you'll be better at gi if you primarily

00:55:00.140 train no gi than you would at no gi if you primarily train gi.

00:55:05.140 I agree.

00:55:05.960 I agree.

00:55:06.680 Because you don't know how to hold someone without grips.

00:55:09.580 That's the, that's the, it's the principles.

00:55:11.700 Yeah.

00:55:11.920 That's the difference.

00:55:12.660 If you know how to pin somebody and hold them and subdue them without holding onto their

00:55:17.320 clothing, you're going to be better when you do.

00:55:19.600 But if all you can do is train and know how to hold onto somebody with clothing, it's going

00:55:23.940 to be harder when they don't have the jacket or the pants that you hope they would be wearing

00:55:27.900 like they would on the mats.

00:55:30.060 Yeah.

00:55:30.340 I do have one more question for you.

00:55:31.900 There's, I've got a couple of questions recently about guys who, uh, they don't have a jujitsu

00:55:38.080 gym near them or either that, or they don't have the time to be able to travel or whatever

00:55:42.220 it may be.

00:55:42.680 They're just some hindering factors.

00:55:45.000 What would you say to a guy who's listening to this and maybe he's never trained or maybe

00:55:50.980 he wrestled in high school or, you know, whatever.

00:55:53.820 And he's like, Hey, maybe, maybe we can get some mats.

00:55:57.280 We can just invest in some mats in the garage and four or five of us could get together and

00:56:02.020 learn like off YouTube or from like Gracie jujitsu or one of these other places that

00:56:06.900 maybe has a program.

00:56:08.400 Do you think that's a wise thing to do knowing there's not really like a Brown or a black

00:56:13.000 belt there to help instruct and lead?

00:56:15.040 Absolutely.

00:56:15.740 I, I would like, if I didn't have knowing what I know now, if I didn't have instruction,

00:56:21.560 but I had a person and I had grass, I would train.

00:56:26.240 Absolutely.

00:56:27.020 Something is better than nothing.

00:56:28.680 And to be frank, you're not getting the full skillset of that black belt anyway, when you

00:56:33.220 first start, right?

00:56:34.180 You're, you're getting the blue belt lesson anyway, you know, so you don't need as high

00:56:40.240 level, you know, training.

00:56:41.680 And then I would supplement that with a road trip.

00:56:44.500 You know, it's like, maybe you have a garage, Gracie garage that you're working a handful

00:56:48.460 of guys and then be intentional and say, Hey, we're going to drive up to whatever town

00:56:53.440 once a month and go hit open mat on a Saturday, you know, and of course, call ahead of time

00:57:00.260 guys trip.

00:57:00.980 Yeah.

00:57:01.320 And, and get a, get some training in with, with people in a school.

00:57:05.140 Absolutely.

00:57:05.680 I would.

00:57:07.580 I did that a little bit with a good friend of mine, Brody Cousineau, when I was in Maine,

00:57:11.320 uh, I would train in the evenings too, but I wanted to train in the morning.

00:57:14.560 I wanted to train five days a week.

00:57:15.940 So him and I would go train one to three days a week in the morning.

00:57:18.800 And we were both white belts at the time and, and I was promoted to blue belt.

00:57:23.580 And so we, it was just me and him and we would beat the shit out of each other.

00:57:27.620 I mean, we would go, he was super strong.

00:57:30.200 I just started getting a little better just because I was putting more time in.

00:57:33.660 That's really all.

00:57:34.520 He's way more athletic than I am way stronger than I was, but I just put a little bit more

00:57:39.880 time.

00:57:40.180 And so it was interesting.

00:57:41.060 You could begin to see the disparity that gap widened.

00:57:44.880 Um, but even still that, that time with him learning and just rolling with him in, in

00:57:52.060 a way that was unorthodox and, you know, not like all the other guys trained in the

00:57:56.020 school was invaluable to me.

00:57:57.960 Yeah.

00:57:58.320 Well, and you know, this, one of the, the greatest, one of the early and greatest lessons that

00:58:03.340 you get from training is the feeling of what it's like to have someone control you and

00:58:10.600 dealing with the emotion, how exhausting it is, exhausting this of it and not wanting

00:58:15.260 to give up and, and, and just dealing with it in itself is, is probably one of the greatest

00:58:21.240 lessons.

00:58:23.400 Yeah.

00:58:24.560 Interesting.

00:58:25.220 All right, cool.

00:58:25.900 What's next?

00:58:26.620 Simon, Tony, what is your opinion on slow living?

00:58:30.700 Thank you so much for what you do.

00:58:32.320 And I don't know what slow living is.

00:58:34.000 I'm hoping that you know what that means.

00:58:35.960 I don't, I can take some, some guesses.

00:58:40.380 I don't really know that term.

00:58:41.940 I don't think I've ever heard that term, but if I had to guess, I would, yeah, I would

00:58:46.820 say you correct me if I'm wrong, if you find anything kit, but I would say that it's just

00:58:50.240 slowing down the pace of life a little bit, maybe not taking on so much.

00:58:53.580 There's probably an aspect of minimalism to it as well.

00:58:57.460 Getting rid of all the stuff and the clutter and the chaos and the nonsense, reducing the

00:59:02.360 things that you have, um, and just, you know, maybe it's living off grid a little bit to

00:59:07.700 some degree or having a way to escape from technology.

00:59:11.200 And I think all of those things are amazing.

00:59:13.900 If that's what it is, I'm a, I'm a fan.

00:59:16.560 Yeah.

00:59:17.040 I think that is huge, hugely important.

00:59:20.200 Did you pull it up?

00:59:21.240 Yeah.

00:59:21.660 According to the, the vast knowledge of the internet, meaning of solidness is a mindset whereby

00:59:28.860 you curate a more meaningful and conscious lifestyle that's in line with what you value

00:59:34.440 most.

00:59:36.280 Yeah.

00:59:36.820 I mean, absolutely.

00:59:37.860 Of course, if that's, if that's the definition that we're using, and I think in order to do

00:59:42.100 that, it's the things that we just discussed, eliminating chaos, eliminating clutter, removing

00:59:47.280 certain people from your life who bring an element that, that shouldn't be there.

00:59:51.400 Uh, there's tasks and projects and business ventures and this and that that probably shouldn't

00:59:56.720 be involved with, I also think it's really important to be intentional and deliberate

01:00:01.280 about your life.

01:00:02.820 I plan in quarterly segments, so I know what I want to accomplish over the next 90 days.

01:00:07.660 And I reverse engineer everything into that end result over 90 days.

01:00:12.700 So what do I need today to do today in order to accomplish that?

01:00:16.640 And what do I need to eliminate and get rid of in order to accomplish that as well?

01:00:20.520 We're actually talking about that in our brotherhood, the iron council this week, last week, we talked

01:00:25.260 a little bit about study this week, we're talking about digital distractions and how you can

01:00:30.020 reduce distraction, clutter, noise, chaos, so that you can focus more on the things that

01:00:34.160 are relevant and pertinent to you.

01:00:36.120 Yeah.

01:00:36.380 A hundred percent on board.

01:00:37.440 Yeah.

01:00:37.800 If that's the definition we're using.

01:00:39.120 Yep.

01:00:39.960 Yeah.

01:00:41.080 Dan MCN, new dad.

01:00:44.040 So congratulations, Dan.

01:00:45.960 Congrats.

01:00:46.320 Six week year old twins.

01:00:49.020 So six, six weeks.

01:00:50.440 Ooh, I feel responsible.

01:00:52.460 Boys or girls, do we know?

01:00:53.300 Um, I don't think so.

01:00:55.960 Nope.

01:00:56.240 Just twins.

01:00:57.020 Okay.

01:00:57.660 I feel response.

01:00:58.820 Uh, I feel responsibility when I'm home to always be doing something to help my girlfriend

01:01:03.300 with them, feeding bottle, washing diapers, other baby stuff.

01:01:07.660 Other responsibilities around the house are piling up.

01:01:10.720 Work is sometimes demanding and my fitness, which is very important to me is getting put

01:01:15.500 on the back burner because of anytime I have to work out, I end up doing baby things.

01:01:20.100 I like spending time with them, but I feel responsibility as a man, my responsibilities

01:01:25.560 as a man are getting pushed aside.

01:01:27.940 I feel anger and resentment building.

01:01:31.000 How can I better handle and approach this?

01:01:33.520 Yeah.

01:01:36.840 Everything you're feeling is normal.

01:01:39.060 Uh, there's a lot of overwhelm.

01:01:40.460 I've, I haven't had twins, so I don't know about that, but I've got four kids.

01:01:45.680 Yeah.

01:01:46.420 So everything you're feeling is overwhelming, not only because your responsibility towards

01:01:50.540 the kids, but because the responsibility you have towards your girlfriend.

01:01:53.860 I mean, one consideration that came up for me is, is how committed are you in this relationship?

01:01:58.800 I'm not saying you need to get married, but I'm actually really curious.

01:02:01.160 Is this like a committed long-term relationship?

01:02:03.480 And what does that look like as the twins get older?

01:02:06.860 And as you guys build your relationship, I, I, I don't want to overlook that.

01:02:11.820 Cause I think too many people are having kids in, in non-committed relationships.

01:02:15.320 I'm not saying that's your scenario, but that came to mind as I heard my girlfriend, something

01:02:20.300 to consider, uh, what I would, what I would really talk, do in this scenario is talk with

01:02:28.160 her about what you just said to us.

01:02:31.640 Hey, hon, I feel an immense sense of responsibility towards the, the, the twins towards you.

01:02:37.980 I want to be here.

01:02:38.860 I want to serve you.

01:02:39.820 I mean, I commend you for even bringing that up.

01:02:41.700 Like the fact that you want to serve her, that's what we ought to be doing.

01:02:44.780 And so you, you tell her that.

01:02:46.240 And then you also say, but I also know how important it is to get my workout.

01:02:50.300 I also know how important it is for me to make sure that I'm providing for our family.

01:02:54.700 So I'm not always here and available as I would like to be.

01:02:59.460 What, how do you think we can handle that?

01:03:03.000 My, my proposal is that I'm going to work out Monday through Friday from 5am to six,

01:03:08.940 and then I'm going to come home and I'll be here from, you know, six to eight or six to

01:03:13.020 nine, whatever your schedule allows.

01:03:15.360 And then I'll go into work and then I'll come home and I'll be fully present here with you.

01:03:19.460 Like whatever your dynamic is, I'm just using that as an example, but whatever your dynamic

01:03:23.260 is, include her in the process because she wants you to be happy.

01:03:26.840 She wants you to be fulfilled.

01:03:28.940 Like she wants you to be in shape.

01:03:31.300 She wants you to make money.

01:03:32.620 Like your guys' goals are aligned.

01:03:35.600 And sometimes it doesn't feel like that because she's stuck at home with the kids and she might

01:03:40.700 even say things.

01:03:41.520 Here's something you hear a lot from new moms.

01:03:43.200 Well, you're out having fun all the time and I'm stuck here with the kids.

01:03:47.040 And of course, that's not what you're doing.

01:03:49.700 You know, yes, you're going to the gym to take care of yourself.

01:03:52.220 And yes, you are socializing with other people through work and lunches and things like that.

01:03:56.420 But she's going to feel that way if she's stuck at home, right?

01:03:59.560 If she feels that way.

01:04:01.240 So I think just be empathetic to that.

01:04:03.720 No, it's a season.

01:04:04.900 It might just be a season.

01:04:06.680 Maybe you don't do five workouts a week.

01:04:09.280 Maybe you do three while because they're only six months, six months or six weeks, six weeks.

01:04:15.380 Yeah.

01:04:15.820 I mean, brand new into this thing, right?

01:04:17.540 So you guys are, she's making adjustments.

01:04:19.880 You're making adjustments.

01:04:21.180 It's going to be hard.

01:04:22.380 Just keep the lines of communication open.

01:04:25.100 Tell her you want to be there and support her.

01:04:27.540 Tell her your things are important.

01:04:28.800 And also third key, tell her her things are important.

01:04:32.380 So, hey, hon, I got the kids for the next hour or two.

01:04:35.920 They're napping right now.

01:04:36.900 Like if they wake up, I'll take care of it.

01:04:39.080 I don't know if she's breastfeeding or I don't know any of that.

01:04:41.920 But there's things that you can do to take care of them.

01:04:45.000 Say, hey, why don't you go take a nap?

01:04:46.880 Or do you think you and your sister would like to go to lunch today?

01:04:49.820 I can come home on my lunch break and watch the boys for an hour.

01:04:53.780 So serve the boys, serve your family, serve your needs, and also make sure that you're serving her needs, that those are met too.

01:05:00.200 Yeah.

01:05:00.340 Just to reiterate what you're already saying and maybe said a different way, where most people go wrong is they sit back.

01:05:06.620 And I'm like, well, I want to be here.

01:05:10.540 And then maybe we'll both hang out with the kids, right?

01:05:14.860 And we're not communicating.

01:05:16.300 Don't make any assumptions.

01:05:18.220 Get black and white.

01:05:19.220 Put it on the table.

01:05:20.220 Hey, I still want to get workouts in.

01:05:21.700 How do I do that in a way that I'm still supporting you?

01:05:24.800 Do you want to get workouts in?

01:05:26.620 How do I support you so you can get those in?

01:05:29.740 And let's identify kind of some roles and responsibilities and schedules.

01:05:35.120 And we kind of shy away from it because we're afraid that, like, there's meaning to it, right?

01:05:40.640 It's like, no.

01:05:41.600 Like, get clear.

01:05:42.620 It doesn't make sense for both of you to get up all night and feed babies.

01:05:47.140 It doesn't.

01:05:48.600 So get clear.

01:05:49.660 Who's going to wake up at night?

01:05:51.160 Who's not?

01:05:51.780 Who's going to get rest?

01:05:52.700 If you both wake up because you both want to support each other, that's not going to work either, right?

01:05:57.520 So that's dumb.

01:05:58.480 Yeah.

01:05:58.740 That's like define some roles and divide and conquer a little bit to make sure you're both winning and supporting each other.

01:06:06.740 Yeah.

01:06:07.220 I never understood when my ex and I were in the stages where she was breastfeeding the babies.

01:06:13.440 It was clear that she got up at night.

01:06:16.180 I don't – I'm not able to do that contrary to some people's belief.

01:06:20.780 Men can't lactate.

01:06:21.860 I'm not able to do that.

01:06:23.160 So why should I be up?

01:06:24.700 I have to get up early and go into work.

01:06:26.800 And that was the agreement that we had.

01:06:28.460 That doesn't work for everybody.

01:06:30.780 But if a woman is breastfeeding, I mean, that makes sense.

01:06:34.040 There's nothing I can do in this moment.

01:06:36.040 So let's work around that a little bit.

01:06:39.420 There's also something that I've called task stacking.

01:06:42.700 So I don't know if I like the term task because it takes away a little bit of the humanity behind it.

01:06:48.340 But working out is a task.

01:06:49.880 Like it's something that you want to do.

01:06:51.200 It's a thing that you want to get done and complete.

01:06:53.780 And also, so is spending time with your girlfriend and your children.

01:06:58.800 Those are tasks.

01:07:00.080 Again, it takes a little bit of the weight and the humanity out of it, but I think you understand.

01:07:03.880 So maybe instead of working out to go back to that scenario five days a week, maybe you do three days a week in the morning.

01:07:10.260 But every Tuesday and Thursday, you guys go for a walk in the evening.

01:07:13.540 And that serves everybody.

01:07:15.940 The kids are getting outside.

01:07:17.880 They're getting some vitamin D.

01:07:19.220 Your wife's moving.

01:07:20.400 She's recovering from pregnancy and delivery.

01:07:23.600 You're feeling good because you're moving your body and you're burning some of those calories.

01:07:27.340 Now, all of a sudden, you're checking two boxes off.

01:07:30.040 Valuable time.

01:07:31.240 Man, what an incredible opportunity to have conversations with her.

01:07:35.020 Expose your kids to the elements outside, which is a good thing, and get your movement in the process.

01:07:41.920 Look for little moments like that.

01:07:43.440 Well, and we've talked about this probably a number of times over the years, but you may have to change your expectation of what working out is.

01:07:52.300 At least in the season.

01:07:53.480 And I can't think of a better way than you dropping and doing 20 push-ups on the top of every hour.

01:08:02.520 That's one minute.

01:08:04.860 Try that.

01:08:06.120 You can't tell me you won't have a good chest day if you're doing 20 push-ups at the top of every hour all day long.

01:08:12.960 Trust me.

01:08:13.420 You'll have a great chest day.

01:08:14.560 So there's ways you might just have to compromise a little bit too and let go of the ideal way you want to work out and make some pivots.

01:08:25.620 You know, one thing that – I can't believe these words are about to come out of my mouth, but it's true.

01:08:30.000 One thing I wish I would have learned and done when my kids were early in those early years like you're talking about, I should have cooked more for my ex-wife.

01:08:40.100 Yeah.

01:08:41.080 I didn't do that.

01:08:42.640 I should have done that.

01:08:43.500 Like that would be an opportunity for me to add value, to serve the family, to learn a new skill, to let her sit down with the baby.

01:08:52.040 Even if she's got the babies on her arms and stuff, like at least she's sitting there and she's not up like cooking.

01:08:57.740 I could have done that.

01:08:58.780 I didn't do that.

01:08:59.780 And so there are things around the house, whether it's things like loading the dishes or deciding to vacuum or straighten some things or do the laundry or cooking.

01:09:09.920 And again, I don't know your dynamic, but if those are things she normally does, go ahead and take those on.

01:09:15.400 You can do those and you should do those.

01:09:17.220 That's a great way to help.

01:09:18.460 Yeah.

01:09:18.540 All right.

01:09:19.460 Last question.

01:09:21.000 Joey Degura, starting point for building an online business.

01:09:25.480 Kind of vague, but open your social media accounts.

01:09:30.820 I mean, that's, that's the place.

01:09:32.260 That's where everybody is.

01:09:33.760 Look, it's important to have a website and have your products and services and offering and things like that.

01:09:38.080 But if you open up your website and you're not really figuring out how to drive people to the website, it really doesn't matter how great or wonderful the website is or your product or service or offering is.

01:09:49.720 So what I always suggest is you have to first go where people are and then you invite them to the things that you have going on.

01:09:58.680 You can't invite people you don't know.

01:10:01.000 So where are they?

01:10:03.340 They're on social media.

01:10:04.700 They're on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, podcasting platforms.

01:10:10.720 And then from there, so you're going to start talking about, you're not going to sell.

01:10:16.660 Okay.

01:10:16.780 That's the thing I don't want you to do yet.

01:10:18.160 Like you're not selling.

01:10:19.400 You're just explaining problems, explaining interesting things that center around a coherent message.

01:10:26.740 Yeah.

01:10:26.840 Then you start inviting them to your space, which is your website or your podcast.

01:10:31.380 And you really want to capture their emails because now you can start going into their homes because they've invited you into their home and you can say, hey, look, here's something to think about.

01:10:40.900 Here's something to consider.

01:10:41.940 Here's something you could learn or here's something you can laugh at today.

01:10:45.820 And then what I do is I what I call cross pollinate my social media accounts.

01:10:50.320 So it's really, really important that you get everybody on Facebook over to Instagram and everybody on Instagram over to TikTok and everybody on TikTok over to Twitter and everybody on Twitter over to YouTube and everybody on YouTube over to your podcasting platform.

01:11:04.360 The more that you can cross pollinate these things, the more people are going to see you in different contexts and different mediums and have a greater affinity and connection with you.

01:11:13.340 But yeah, social media is where it starts because that's where everybody is.

01:11:18.080 Yeah.

01:11:18.760 Yeah.

01:11:19.000 That makes sense.

01:11:20.400 I think I don't know if this is valuable to add, but I've seen this too often where everyone goes, I have this great idea.

01:11:27.680 I'm going to make a website.

01:11:28.900 And then they're like, it's going to happen.

01:11:31.320 Right.

01:11:31.740 It's like no one's going to go to your website just because you have a great idea.

01:11:36.200 Right.

01:11:36.700 So whether it's social media or other means, you have to generate traffic.

01:11:43.080 So figure that out.

01:11:44.440 You can have a great product, a great site, great online store.

01:11:48.160 It doesn't matter.

01:11:49.160 But if people don't know about it, then that's not going to work.

01:11:51.900 And of course, you can go the SEO route.

01:11:54.580 You can go social media ads.

01:11:56.760 But there's also something to be said for vetting what you're selling.

01:12:03.660 If you can't have success from a minimal perspective, then the probability of you just opening up a website and generating tons of sales is going to be really low.

01:12:19.540 So vet it, vet it somehow without just like dumping tons of money into ads and SEO.

01:12:27.820 You need to confirm that there's a market for what you're trying to sell.

01:12:30.840 So yeah, yep, absolutely.

01:12:34.540 Okay, man.

01:12:35.380 Cool, man.

01:12:35.980 Well, why don't you bring us home today, Kip?

01:12:37.300 Yeah, absolutely.

01:12:38.560 So the key thing, connect with us on X and Instagram at Ryan Mickler.

01:12:45.160 Of course, you can join our Facebook group.

01:12:47.200 That's facebook.com slash group slash Order of Man.

01:12:50.560 To learn more about the Iron Council, we're actually currently closed.

01:12:54.120 But you can sign up for the Battle Ready program.

01:12:57.840 That is a self-paced program that will actually prepare you for joining the Iron Council.

01:13:03.300 To learn more, go to orderofman.com slash battle ready.

01:13:07.200 And of course, you can get your latest Order of Man swag at the Order of Man store.

01:13:12.300 That's store.orderman.com.

01:13:16.800 Anything else?

01:13:18.940 That's it.

01:13:19.680 Sounded like you had more to say.

01:13:20.920 You got it all.

01:13:21.580 Well, I was going to bring up the full disclosure and authenticity here.

01:13:26.140 I forgot the URL for the adventure stuff.

01:13:30.760 Oh, M42 Adventures.

01:13:32.160 M42 Adventures.

01:13:33.180 Yeah, M42 Adventures.

01:13:34.900 And that's the number 42.

01:13:36.680 So M, the number 42, adventures.com.

01:13:40.020 Excellent.

01:13:40.900 That's right.

01:13:41.320 Okay.

01:13:42.300 Cool.

01:13:42.900 All right, guys.

01:13:43.580 Appreciate you.

01:13:44.120 Great questions today.

01:13:45.280 As always, hope we gave something for you to consider and chew on and make your life better.

01:13:49.260 That's what we're about.

01:13:50.040 Giving you the tools and resources you need to be a better man.

01:13:53.000 So go out there, take action, become the man you are meant to be.

01:14:01.140 Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast.

01:14:04.120 You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be.

01:14:07.800 We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.

01:14:11.280 We'll be right back.

01:14:12.100 We'll be right back.

01:14:12.300 We'll be right back.

01:14:30.180 We'll be right back.

01:14:34.280 We'll be right back.

Order of Man - April 10, 2024

Do Not validate Mental Derangement, Men are NOT worthless, and Gi or No-Gi BJJ in a Street Fight

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