Order of Man - DOUG MARCAIDA ｜ Tempering Violence Through Skill and Familiarity

00:00:00.000 Extreme violence is something not all of us are likely to face anytime soon. And that's a good

00:00:04.960 thing, but that doesn't mean that it can't happen at the drop of a hat. And in that moment, it is

00:00:10.140 significantly better, obviously to be prepared and aware of what could happen than to be ignorant to

00:00:16.440 it completely. And that's where my guest today, Doug Markita comes in. He is a martial artist,

00:00:21.980 edge weapons specialist, and knife designer. And he's also one of the judges on the extremely

00:00:26.800 popular history channel show, Forged in Fire. Today, we talk about creating a home as a safe

00:00:32.400 environment for your family, the culture of violence, martial arts, and their efficacy,

00:00:38.220 curbing the beast inside all of us, the concept of verbal judo, and ultimately how to temper violence

00:00:44.040 through skill and familiarity. You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest, embrace your

00:00:49.460 fears, and boldly chart your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time,

00:00:55.040 every time. You are not easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong. This is

00:01:01.660 your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become at the end of the day. And after all

00:01:07.340 is said and done, you can call yourself a man. Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is

00:01:12.620 Ryan Michler. I'm the host and the founder of the Order of Man podcast and movement. I'm glad that you

00:01:17.660 are here, whether you've been listening for a year or five years, or this is your very first show.

00:01:23.520 And if it is your very first show, and it could possibly be because we have seen so much growth

00:01:29.580 over the past couple of months, which is a testament to the work that we're doing in attempting to and

00:01:34.720 doing a good job. If I might say so myself in reclaiming and restoring masculinity. And that's

00:01:40.160 what this movement is all about. It's about giving you the tools, the conversations, the resources you

00:01:44.820 need to thrive and excel as a husband, a father, a business owner, a community leader, and just a man

00:01:51.960 in general. I think there's a dismissal at a minimum with regards to men and culture and society.

00:01:58.500 And it's my job to help elevate us to the mantle that we should all be sitting atop and serving

00:02:03.680 other people and leading well. I think that would solve a lot of the problems that we're dealing with

00:02:07.600 in culture and society. So to that end, we have conversations on this podcast. And today I've got

00:02:13.360 a very, very interesting and fascinating guest, Doug Marketa. We're going to get to that in just a

00:02:18.440 minute. Before we do, I just want to give a shout out to a organization that helps make this show

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00:03:08.740 originusa.com. And I would specifically recommend picking up their new heavy hoodie. Just type in

00:03:16.160 heavy hoodie in the search box on originusa.com. And if you end up picking up a heavy hoodie or boots

00:03:21.580 or denim or nutritional supplements, use the code order, because you're going to save some money when

00:03:26.700 you do. And it's also going to let the guys know that we are sending people their way. So it supports

00:03:32.500 everybody again, originusa.com use the code order at checkout. All right, guys, let me introduce you

00:03:40.320 to Doug Marcaida. He is a martial artist. He's an edge weapon specialist. He's a knife designer.

00:03:47.240 Doug's originally from the Philippines, but he moved to the States when he was eight years old.

00:03:51.340 He served eight years in the U S air force as a respiratory specialist and has since spent decades

00:03:57.420 traveling all over the world, teaching first responders, police officers, military personnel,

00:04:02.220 personnel, the foundations of what he knows about martial arts and also knife fighting. Now you may

00:04:08.520 know him as a judge on history channels, forged in fire. And of course his signature phrase, which I

00:04:13.820 did get him to say today, which is it will kill. You guys know what I'm talking about if you watch

00:04:19.040 this show, but I think this conversation is really going to open your eyes to who Doug is more than just

00:04:24.020 what you see on TV, his immense, immense appreciation for martial arts and ultimately how it can serve

00:04:30.540 you enjoy guys. You know, it was interesting. Um, as you were talking about with the kids leaving and

00:04:38.880 missing those moments. And once they find friends, I went to my second son's football game yesterday

00:04:43.640 and my son, my oldest son, my 13 year old basically said, all right, thanks dad. Can I have some money

00:04:49.500 for the snack shack? And then I didn't see him for two hours. Cause he was running around with his

00:04:52.780 friends and chasing girls and everything else. Yeah, that's exactly, you know, there was a point when I

00:04:57.360 was looking at my youngest and I go, at what point did I lose you? And I remember it was like, it was like

00:05:03.860 eighth grade or what? No, seventh grade when he started having friends, because before that we were his

00:05:09.980 friends, we were always the friends around always with the family or our family friends. And that's all we did

00:05:14.540 always hanging out with us, doing everything else. But the minute he started to have his own friend, I think I

00:05:19.200 lost him the first night he had an overnight stay at a friend's house. Then all of a sudden it's coming

00:05:24.560 home, talking with friends, hanging out with them all the time. And like, where's my boy? Where's my

00:05:28.680 boy? Where are they? The others were ahead. So that's how we lost them. But then I really had a

00:05:34.080 hard time dealing with that when they were in their teens, because now they're always on their own.

00:05:37.600 They don't come out of their rooms or gaming and all that. And it bothered me a lot. And my wife goes,

00:05:42.320 well, you have to enjoy their growth. That's what happens. They're learning to spread their wings,

00:05:45.440 your boys. But the beauty of that eventually is they come around full circle. Once they've gone out and seen

00:05:50.840 everything there, then they find out, oh, because home is home base. It's a safest place to be. So

00:05:56.960 they can come back home all the time. That's one of the things. At first, I really had an issue with

00:06:01.980 it. I had an issue because I wanted them around all the time. But I didn't realize that by having

00:06:07.220 an issue, I could even push them further away. Right. Always make this the safest place, no matter what

00:06:13.600 they do. So that no matter where they are, they'll miss home because they felt it was always the

00:06:18.420 safest place. And I learned that, wow, the hard way. So are you pretty close with your boys now?

00:06:25.440 Yes. I'm wearing my Marine shirt. My middle one's a Marine. My eldest is a paramedic and my youngest

00:06:32.000 is off to college having a great time. And I lived through him. Tell me, what are you doing? Please

00:06:36.660 write me. You're having the best times. I never got to experience that. So, you know, but it's more like

00:06:43.140 I really miss them when they were young. That's my own insecurities, my own needing. I needed that

00:06:48.560 love around them. But my wife taught me to enjoy them. If I'm so focused on what I had, then I don't

00:06:55.540 enjoy what's going on in front of me. And it goes, enjoy them becoming their own men. You're missing

00:07:02.080 out on that. Always complaining about when they were young and everything else. You need that? Okay,

00:07:06.020 good. Let's get a puppy. Boom. I got it. All right. Now I got my puppy in and they're doing their own

00:07:10.080 things. I'm enjoying them with my puppy. Yeah. No, I, I, I'm not there yet with my boys leaving

00:07:15.340 and I'm glad for that, you know, and my daughter as well. I'm glad that they haven't left yet,

00:07:19.380 but it is really bittersweet to see them grow and mature and develop. You're like, Oh, I just want to

00:07:24.340 play football and catch and wrestle. And they want to go chase, you know, girls and hang out their

00:07:28.120 friends. And that gets to be a challenge, but it's all natural. It's all good. That's, that's the way

00:07:31.380 of life is it should be. Exactly. The cycle of life. And in as much as we always want things to say the

00:07:37.540 same, one thing's guaranteed. It will change. It's a matter of us to learn how to adapt to that

00:07:41.920 change. Yeah. How does this, how does this juxtapose from your relationship with your folks? Were you,

00:07:47.340 were you pretty close with your parents and how did that all play out? No, it didn't. It wasn't

00:07:52.300 that way. My, my mother migrated when I was in my teens to the U S and I grew up pretty much in a,

00:07:58.320 you know, I lived with my grandmother and my relatives. My father was, was on home Sundays,

00:08:02.700 you know, it was a broken family. So even though I felt love in a different way, it was different.

00:08:08.980 It wasn't a close knit family in the sense of they're there every time everybody was all over

00:08:14.100 the place. Um, I, I basically found family in a sense through my friends, you know, I was,

00:08:20.300 I was in gangs in a young year. I was a, I had a troubled childhood, um, uh, very angry childhood.

00:08:25.860 So I made sure that, um, becoming a parent myself, I wanted not to commit the same mistakes and it's

00:08:32.780 hard not to, because you think certain ways are the ways it should be because that was your comfort

00:08:37.520 zone. But then learning it from my wife says, no, that doesn't have to be that way. You know,

00:08:42.460 there's a different way, a more loving way. I came from a stern family. So there's a lot of anger

00:08:46.560 issues with, uh, the way I was raised only because I thought that's how it had to be cultural differences

00:08:52.240 too. Yeah. So that's interesting. I was going to ask you where that anger came from. You're

00:08:58.160 saying that it's a by-product of maybe the family dynamic and the culture that you grew up. Where

00:09:02.360 did you, where did you, uh, immigrate from? Yeah, I was born and raised in the Philippines. I came here

00:09:06.780 when I was 18. Um, yeah. Um, coming from a broken family, um, a lot of anger towards both sides of the

00:09:15.140 family, because there was reasons, you know, there was warring between the splits and I was going between

00:09:20.160 my mom's side of the family or my dad's side of the family. But, um, because my uncles and aunts

00:09:27.460 were always saying bad things about the other side, the other side. So when I'm with my dad's

00:09:31.060 family, uh, I'm angry at them because they're telling me bad things about the other family.

00:09:35.760 And when I'm with the other family, it's the vice versa. So all I knew was anger. And that became

00:09:40.080 my comfort zone. Did you, so I know that martial arts obviously, um, and weaponry is a big part of

00:09:46.960 your life now. Is that when you started to get involved in the martial arts arena, having to

00:09:53.280 defend yourself, fighting that sort of thing? Or when did that come about? Um, I always fought as

00:09:57.980 a kid. I was a bully that I took it out on my friends who said, you know, um, nothing I'm proud

00:10:02.700 of. I just realized that the anger I had in the family, I take out with my friends as kids.

00:10:08.200 But later on, my dad said, I got kicked out of school. So my dad was saying, you know,

00:10:11.760 you're getting too many fights and knowing the culture, he himself was a violent person,

00:10:16.040 you know, in terms of what was going on outside, he was knowing the culture, you're going to get

00:10:20.000 into your teams. They don't fight fair anymore. Your fistfights are coming to an end later on.

00:10:25.280 People are going to start carrying knives because that's a culture back home. We carry weapons.

00:10:28.780 So I had to learn some kind of martial art. Now, as a youngster, I love to kick box, you know,

00:10:33.840 with my own friends and everything. I was, you know, I love anything that had impact on it.

00:10:38.120 So I took a lot of kickboxing, some small judo and some karate. Of course,

00:10:43.060 taekwondo was my favorite. Thinking that if I learned that I'm going to kick ass much better,

00:10:48.520 you know, I'll be better at it. I'm going to kick, you know, much better at my kicks and beating up

00:10:52.680 people. But it tamed me. It tamed me. You know, I was surprised. And I think that I attributed that

00:10:59.000 because there was respect taught in the class. There was a lot of, you pretty much let all your anger

00:11:06.060 out when you're training and they can't get calmer. But I always had a fear of weapons.

00:11:11.500 And I recently come out to say, you know, the reason for that was when I was with a wrong kind

00:11:16.080 of crowd, I was accosted. It was an incident, a traumatic incident where I was at knife point.

00:11:21.560 And that scared the daylights out of me. So when I saw knives, I was, you know, afraid,

00:11:26.900 definitely afraid of that. But it wasn't until my adult years when I was actually in the military.

00:11:30.840 Now, granted, in the Philippines, that's the art that they trained with weapons. And I used to

00:11:37.460 think, why would I want to learn with that? Those guys carry knives. They're thugs.

00:11:40.800 Right.

00:11:41.000 Every one of them trying to like, why can't they fight with their hands? Why do they have to have

00:11:43.800 a knife? Why did they ruin it with sticks and everything? Who carries weapons like that anyways?

00:11:47.540 Well, only the criminals do in my mindset. But when I finally was in the Air Force, I bumped into

00:11:53.040 someone who was definitely a weapons expert, but at least an expert, the art that he came from.

00:11:58.200 And we were actually creating our own version of our own mixed martial arts that we were doing.

00:12:04.840 And he was just throwing me left and right, empty handed. There were no weapons. We were just,

00:12:08.680 you know, sparring. And I'm like, and at that time, Seagal was, you know, just coming out with

00:12:12.640 above the law. And I'm like, wow, is this Aikido? I could jujitsu and everything. He goes,

00:12:16.660 oh, it's Kali. I'm like, Kali? You're like, California. Very cool. Because I knew he was from

00:12:20.360 California. And he goes, no, that's actually Filipino martial arts. I'm like, wait a minute. I'm

00:12:25.280 Filipino. What are you talking about? You know, Kali? No, our niece and a screamer. Oh,

00:12:30.860 wear your sticks. Wear your knives. He goes like, you don't need those. You think? Then he showed

00:12:35.460 me some stuff and he pulled out a balisong. Freak me out again. Freak me out. So I'm like, well,

00:12:41.200 yeah, sure. You don't want to kick back? Are you sure? Well, you know, I'll show you this,

00:12:45.440 but that's where it comes from. Then I go, I got to face my fears eventually. I got to face it.

00:12:51.340 And prior to that also, another thing also stunned me. It's funny because it's like therapy for me to

00:12:56.840 have these memories come out. We were at a party with the same group of guys and we got into a

00:13:02.360 fight. You know, some guys came over. They weren't happy what's going on. We came out and it turned

00:13:07.520 into a racial thing, a gang thing, you know, their group against my group. And I just lost it. I came

00:13:12.220 out. I started beating the crap out of the guy and we got split up and everything. We all came in and

00:13:16.800 everyone's, you know, so I noticed when I turned around, who was around me, you know,

00:13:22.460 who moved my boys were around me and they were like, yeah, yeah, you know, and everything else.

00:13:26.280 But there was one guy in the corner, in the corner. It's like, and I go, Hey, thanks a lot,

00:13:30.080 Nilo, man. Thanks for the backup and stuff. You know, we were there fighting. Where were you?

00:13:34.540 And I saw, it was like, yeah, it was just quiet. Then he walks back and puts back a knife in the

00:13:39.540 drawer. Freaks me out. Yeah. You came out there while I was fighting and you went in the kitchen

00:13:46.240 and he came out with a knife hiding. And he goes, you never know who's carrying among those guys.

00:13:51.120 You're stupid. You just went out there and confronted them. You think there's my culture.

00:13:55.660 There's my home because he was Filipino to the world. He was like, damn. So the knife culture was

00:14:00.500 there. And once again, when I saw that, got scared. I'm like, he could have shot me or stabbed me.

00:14:05.220 I'm not thinking that. So I had to fear. I had to realize that in this world, it's a prey or

00:14:12.480 predators and the predators are always armed. You'll never find a predator go out there and try

00:14:16.920 to get its prey. That's unarmed because that's their living. That's how they survive in the jungle.

00:14:21.720 They got to have something. They won't fight someone who's armed because they get injured.

00:14:25.300 They die. That's how they eat. Yeah. That's, it is interesting. And it's, it is, it's also interesting.

00:14:30.360 And I think this is pretty common among successful people and people that have found their path,

00:14:34.880 so to speak, is they take negative experiences. They take the things that they're afraid of.

00:14:40.560 And rather than running away from those things, they run towards those things. And so it sounds

00:14:44.720 like you became familiar with weapons, knives, martial arts, and you really thrust yourself

00:14:50.920 into that arena as opposed to just rejecting it altogether. It was my biggest fear. And then

00:14:55.780 when I realized that if your fear becomes your strength, then everything's easy. I just went

00:15:01.680 head on and I loved it, you know, and I found power in it because this thing that I was afraid

00:15:06.260 of now I'm, I'm in it. Where else can I go? I've already, I'm facing the very thing that I'm afraid

00:15:11.340 of. Now, if I really learned to enjoy it and find out that I, I am it, then it's no longer

00:15:16.800 something that, uh, you know, that controls me. I control it.

00:15:21.440 Did you ever feel like this would be something that you would turn into a career at some point?

00:15:27.640 Was there any thought of that or was it, Hey, I'm just going to learn this while I'm in the air

00:15:31.060 force or while I'm pursuing other career aspirations?

00:15:34.740 Never pure passion, pure passion. I mean, at that time, you know, I knew martial artists,

00:15:41.660 martial artists are broke. You know, the only ones that I went to are the ones who are trying to teach

00:15:46.240 kids and everything. This is an art form. We don't teach kids. I gave up my life to train this

00:15:50.660 because I was in love with it. Um, weekends when everybody was going there, I was in a station

00:15:55.520 Biloxi. My teacher was in New Orleans. So I drive all the way there on my weekends. We trained for

00:16:01.640 six hours on Saturdays, go get there at 6 PM, not done till midnight. And we loved it because we were

00:16:07.040 all that passionate about it. And I was just, you know, like I said, well, I didn't realize later on,

00:16:12.840 and I have an obsessive compulsion, you know, I delve myself into that. So, but yeah, it was pure

00:16:19.200 passion. Never have I thought it would be anything for, for commerce, never a business. It wasn't until

00:16:25.400 later that, um, one of the things that my teacher told me was when he left about a year and a half

00:16:31.300 after he had leave. And I'm like, all right, this sucks. You know, I, where's my training? And he goes,

00:16:36.020 here's your second phase of your training, start teaching. I'm like, what? You don't have to open a

00:16:41.100 school. Just find a training partner. I'm like, but I don't know this. And then I, I found another

00:16:47.060 group to study with. It was, uh, Indonesian martial arts, Indonesian air force. So I, I befriended

00:16:52.880 them. I sponsored them on base, but one of them was an instructor in the Indonesian martial art of

00:16:57.500 Silat, which I was familiar with also. So I became a student. It wasn't until we had a party and they

00:17:02.380 were leaving that, uh, one of the guys in the party goes, well, what happens? You know, I heard your

00:17:06.900 Filipino, Filipino, that I heard, you know, this weaponry and everything. So what happens? You

00:17:10.400 don't have a weapon. I'm like, what do you mean? And he goes, what if I start throwing punches at

00:17:14.440 you and everything? I just went at it and everything. I would do this. I would do that. I would do this.

00:17:18.060 And I'm like, it's pouring out of me. And the Indonesian is like, you got all this, you know,

00:17:22.980 this, I'm like, yeah, but I'm a student when I'm with you. I don't ask, you know, I'm not there to,

00:17:27.520 but I just started pouring out of me. And I immediately called my instructor and told him, wow,

00:17:32.140 because my instructor would never show us empty hands. Never. It was pure weapons, but he also

00:17:37.500 told us it's, it's, you've got the hands. It's there. Well, what is the weapon? Your hands. I'm

00:17:42.540 like, oh, but it was just pouring out. And then he goes, there's your thing. You just found out about

00:17:46.400 something. I would never show you empty hands on purpose. I'd show you like ideas of it, but you

00:17:51.800 were really a weapon. So, you know, because your hands are now the weapons because you had nothing to

00:17:54.760 pick up. So I'm like, wow. The concepts are probably similar, right? Whether you have a weapon or you have,

00:17:59.840 or it's just your hands, the concepts are probably similar.

00:18:03.220 They're similar, but the mindset is not. You see, there's a difference between picking up a weapon.

00:18:08.700 You see, when my experience in finding empty hand arts, start martial arts from empty hands,

00:18:14.540 boxing, kickboxing, grappling, and all that is that they start at that point. But then when they get

00:18:19.300 the weapons, the mind switches, they don't know how to move with a weapon in their hand. It's very

00:18:23.500 awkward for them. Now, when you find on the contrast in the Filipino martial arts, what's the difference?

00:18:27.800 We start out with weapons all the time. You know, arm yourself. Why would you want to go punch

00:18:32.400 something? Well, why would I use a bolo and a machete? Because boxing and kickboxing doesn't

00:18:36.820 work against machetes. History has proven that. So start at the most lethal and work your way back.

00:18:41.860 But then you start to realize, oh, I am the weapon. Everything I pick up is a tool. Even my hands

00:18:50.740 are a tool. So once you get that mindset, then everything now is a possibility of you being

00:18:57.200 better. And that's where I start to realize that I'm armed all the time. I've got a computer. I've got

00:19:04.780 this headphones on. I've got my phone here. I've got everything else around me to use as a tool.

00:19:10.500 And I'm always armed. They always say, you know, you have to put a knife and everything else. And

00:19:17.140 they go, they're just betterly made. So I don't have to look for it. But trust me, everything around

00:19:21.160 me is a weapon. I'm armed all the time. That's a good point. I hadn't considered that because

00:19:25.440 sometimes when I see knife fighting and martial arts that involve blades, I see it on Instagram.

00:19:31.560 And to me, what immediately comes to me is, well, this is a very nice choreographed movement between

00:19:37.560 an instructor and a trainee or something. But I'm like, in the real world, like how applicable is

00:19:44.300 that? I mean, I've got a knife on me, but I use it mostly for, you know, cutting things or opening

00:19:48.460 something else. I usually have a firearm on me. I've never really thought about carrying a knife

00:19:53.900 around for self-defense because I have a little bit of a, maybe a bad taste in my mouth for these

00:20:01.340 choreographed dances that I see on Instagram, as opposed to how it really would go down in the

00:20:05.100 real world. Yep. Because, well, the choreography that created there is for safety purposes, period.

00:20:11.360 It's for safety. It's like, if I do this, you know, I'm going to train you to move this way.

00:20:15.760 Now your opponent is your training partner. Your opponent is your, is your, you know,

00:20:20.460 it's a guy feeding you so that you don't hurt him. So I have to choreograph this because later on,

00:20:26.780 and that's all, one of the things people don't get is what you see on video and all that,

00:20:30.660 that's only one phase. You know, in our training, what I don't have there, and now it's, of course,

00:20:35.840 it's all over because of fortune fire. We attack, we cut things, we do these things. You know,

00:20:41.520 you're, you have to see the cause and consequences of what a blade can do, a small blade compared to

00:20:45.800 a big blade, what impact and trauma. I've known this because part of my job was being a respiratory

00:20:52.600 therapist in emergency room. I was also teaching law enforcement. So I saw the cause and consequences

00:20:57.920 of blunt force trauma of stab wounds and everything else. I always appreciated that,

00:21:01.880 but to go out there and test it, we can't do that. We can't go out and stab, stab people,

00:21:07.600 you know, society, but we know that. So the idea there is, I don't question how deadly a bullet

00:21:17.120 is when it comes out of a gun. Common sense, I know it. So I don't question how deadly an edge

00:21:23.180 is or how point it's going to do to the body, but I do question how it moves. Now, let me go to this

00:21:29.020 to make a point on this. Martial arts is about body movement. Violence does not need martial arts.

00:21:38.580 Just ask everybody in jail who's committed, you know, stabbing or hammered somebody in the head and

00:21:43.800 everything else. It doesn't require this. It is martial art of the moves that actually help you

00:21:48.400 prevent that from happening. It's a martial artist in you that the true fight is not the person in

00:21:53.600 front of you. The true fight is you stopping yourself from fighting because you've got an ego

00:21:56.960 that you can, you know, you're, you're good. You know, you can do this. So in doing all these

00:22:02.880 choreography and all these nice fancy moves and everything else, there's also a reason for doing

00:22:08.420 that. You see, if violence is all about stabbing, just walk up to something and start stabbing it.

00:22:12.600 There's no defense against that, especially sudden violence. Just cut, cut, cut, cut, stab, stab,

00:22:16.420 stab. That's it. You don't need all that fancy stuff. Good. So you're a killer. Very good. So what

00:22:22.020 now? Now, the fact that I can parry a knife, I can disarm it, I can move it in a controlled society,

00:22:28.560 you know, in a controlled way, I'm actually able to move around and feel that I'm in control because

00:22:34.260 nobody's cutting each other and getting hurt. That's what you need to bring yourself down from being

00:22:40.340 very high on killing. You see, that's, what's missing. We, we train people, you know, you want

00:22:46.260 to be violent. Go, go shoot someone. Stab, stab, stab. You come back now. Go give your kid a hug.

00:22:51.380 No. How am I going to do that? Good. You're, you're trained to be violent. Now do these motions,

00:22:57.500 all these motions, all these motions, and you wear it out of yourself. Now you were in control,

00:23:02.540 weren't you? Yeah. Now go give your kid a hug. Yeah, I can. Cause I just controlled that.

00:23:06.280 So when you see martial arts that have forms, that have all these cut or all these different

00:23:12.400 things, all choreographed, just showing that I can control this. I know sudden violence is not

00:23:17.380 choreographed, but you know, it's there. Now, my teacher always told me what is the most advanced,

00:23:24.500 no, what is the most basic strike? I'll show you. I don't know if this is a video podcast, but what's

00:23:29.500 the most basic strike? This. So what I'm doing is just slashing down. That's the most basic strike.

00:23:34.380 Okay, good. Then you train. Now he'll ask you, what's the most advanced strike? This,

00:23:39.540 you know, and I'm doing really complex. He goes, no, it's this. I keep it simple. But if you keep

00:23:45.600 on doing this, but the fact that you can do all this other stuff, you think this is not advanced

00:23:51.120 for me. Very easy. When I trained a particular group at the Forest Recon in Philippine Marines,

00:23:57.640 the commander asked me to train their group because we were part of the martial arts system that we were

00:24:02.620 doing. And when he, and I knew this particular group was nothing but killers. You can even be

00:24:08.400 part of this group if you have not seen combat or killed. So it's very intimidating. So I go to him

00:24:13.920 and I go, uh, commander, I need about, I have a question about this. Your guys, I know about them

00:24:20.880 and I, they're my friends too, but I'm just able to do a skilled way. You know, I mean, how can I be the

00:24:27.540 ones to teach them when they're the ones who've done it already? And he goes, Doug, you have the

00:24:31.920 ability to take yourself to a place where they have not been. Who's to say that's not real.

00:24:40.140 Can you prove to me yesterday did not happen? Oh, he goes, yeah, look, the skills you have.

00:24:47.700 Oh no. He says violence is nothing more than an opportunity to do it. That's what happened to

00:24:52.660 them. This is their job. So who's to say that learning your skills will bring them because

00:24:57.980 that's the, that's the opportunity for them to do it. They'll do it cleaner and faster.

00:25:03.480 Once again, complex and simplicity is nothing more than simplicity. Well executed. It just looks

00:25:09.160 complex to me, but it's just a bunch of movements put together, choreographed together. Now, when you

00:25:14.500 see the finished motion of movies and training, you see from a to 10, from number one to 10 moves,

00:25:20.580 but you only need, you and I know you need that. You need one and five moves or two moves,

00:25:25.560 not even in the sequence, but you're that skilled. It's the same way as when you look at it from a

00:25:31.340 point of view of, let's say, um, a mission, a military mission, right? You have, here's the

00:25:37.680 mission. There's the village. Okay. Attack. You don't do that. So that's what it is. That's a melee,

00:25:43.460 right? Just kill him. No, we have an insertion extraction for every movement you got. I've got

00:25:48.800 contingency plans. Letter A, if this happens, letter B, if this happens, letter C, if this

00:25:52.760 happens, that's what all those choreographed moves are. It's to give you the big picture

00:25:58.140 that if it should ever happen, you have an answer to it.

00:26:01.180 That's interesting. The way you're saying it with regards to just, Hey, just run in there and,

00:26:05.080 and take the village versus strategic planning and the importance of ensuring that you have those

00:26:10.500 plans. You have the contingencies. Everybody knows what they're doing. Do you ever feel like,

00:26:15.380 um, there's a false sense of security with martial arts. Now I'll, I'll readily admit I've only

00:26:21.140 really trained jujitsu. And, and I wonder with those who are in martial arts, if it ever lulls

00:26:28.840 them in, whether it's knife fighting or jujitsu or karate or any form of arts, if it lulls them into a

00:26:35.140 false sense of security, because I know, for example, you know, if I'm surrounded by three guys

00:26:40.060 and I'm trying to, you know, put an arm bar on somebody in a street fight, I'm going to probably end up

00:26:44.840 dead. But, but I think there's a lot of people who use it as a false sense of security and they

00:26:50.700 end up getting themselves potentially hurt or killed. Yeah. Well, I agree. You know, there is,

00:26:55.960 there is, because there are two things. The thing with martial arts is that people take it for

00:27:02.940 different reasons. And I've come up with something with, I hope you're not taking martial arts to

00:27:08.220 defend yourself. I hope you're not taking martial arts to stop violence. What do you mean by that?

00:27:13.400 That's why I'm taking it. No, because if that's what you're doing, carry a gun.

00:27:17.700 You're more successful preparing as carrying a gun, arm yourself with a knife. So why am I taking

00:27:23.160 martial arts for, like I said, violence is just an opportunity. Violence is easy. You don't need

00:27:28.180 martial arts to be violent and be successful at it, but you need to be able to control that beast.

00:27:33.020 Also martial arts could all, you know, I remember having this discussion with someone where they're

00:27:37.400 saying, you're going to go to that guy. That guy's so fat with his black belt and he barely can punch.

00:27:42.360 Look at him. He's just teaching kids. And I'll guarantee you, he's never been in a fight.

00:27:46.840 Then I look at the guy and go, he's never been in a fight. That's the kind of person you should

00:27:51.520 be heralding. He's never been in a fight. Maybe he's taking martial arts because it makes him a

00:27:56.700 better father. Maybe he's taking martial arts because it makes him a better citizen. Maybe he's

00:28:00.680 taking martial arts because it curbs his drug or vices. You just want to herald the guy who gets into

00:28:05.820 a fight all the time. What kind of, what kind of role model is that? That guy can't even be a

00:28:10.480 normal person. He beats the crap out of his wife or kids. You want to herald that because he's a

00:28:15.360 fighter? So martial arts to me is just another ends to a means of being a better person. Martial

00:28:21.660 arts should make you a better, not bitter person. And some people only look at martial arts as well.

00:28:27.540 How many fights you've been? What's successful in all that? Okay. You're good at that. Can you dodge

00:28:32.240 a bullet? Can you dodge a stab when you're not ready for it? Because that's basically what have

00:28:37.080 happened to a lot of martial artists who thought they were invincible, that they had the right

00:28:40.840 thing because they've been in fights. You've been in fights, but you've not been in a killing

00:28:45.620 incident. There's a difference.

00:28:49.640 Yeah, definitely. I mean, for me, the only fights I've been in are, you know, a couple little schoolyard

00:28:54.220 fights when I was in, you know, middle school or high school. And that's, that's about it. That's

00:28:58.160 the extent of, of that. You know, I spent time in the military, but that's not fighting. That's

00:29:02.300 pure, that's violence and that's hate and hostility. That's different than what you're

00:29:07.880 saying with defending yourself in a street fight. Yeah, totally different. The whole,

00:29:13.380 the rules are different. Well, put it this way. Even the intent is different. You know,

00:29:18.820 here's the thing about getting into fights. Everybody seems to think that just because

00:29:22.020 they have the martial art way, which the martial art way is full of rules. I learned to kickbox

00:29:26.440 as a referee and the ring and everything else. Right. Slap a killer who's never trained,

00:29:31.180 but only knows that he wants to kill what's in front of him. Defend against that.

00:29:35.760 Yeah. You know, I've met, I've met those guys and they're not martial artists. They're scary.

00:29:40.380 I've met gangsters who've done things. They're not martial artists. They laugh about it. They'll go,

00:29:45.380 no, you know, I'll shake your hand and I'll poison you. I'll shake your hand when you're drunk and

00:29:48.960 stab me. I'll follow you home when you don't know me. You know, the biggest thing I remember when,

00:29:53.300 because I started off also in a very aggressive martial arts system that was all this bravado. We're the

00:29:58.440 tough guy. We carry knives. You come mess with me. I'll cut you and I'll bullshit. That was because

00:30:02.660 my teacher was like that. But what happened was one day I did a seminar and I was really showing

00:30:08.480 off and I was young and full of testosterone and braggadocio and everything else. When an old man

00:30:13.560 finally approached me, he goes, you're very good with your art on the side. He goes, you're very

00:30:16.760 good with your art. And I bet you if we fought, you'll do me. But you know what? I've got a finger.

00:30:21.300 I'm like, oh God, what's the thing? You make me smell it? I can pull a trigger. But better yet,

00:30:27.740 I'm rich. I'll pay somebody to kill you. So don't disrespect this, your martial art. I hope you're

00:30:35.740 better than that. What do you say to that? That changed my mind to a lot of things. You know,

00:30:42.140 it's like, wow, this man was really being honest. Maybe my braggadocio has to be, you know,

00:30:48.000 maybe I'm not all that. Or maybe just because I got a weapon, it's not that. Maybe there's more

00:30:53.520 to this that I get to change. That's when I started to learn. I've got to turn martial arts

00:30:57.320 to change me because it's supposed to make me better, not bitter.

00:31:02.380 How has it changed you outside of just, you know, the defense and violence tempering component of it?

00:31:09.580 How has it changed you personally?

00:31:11.660 It's like I said, it taught me to curb the beast. The true enemy is myself.

00:31:17.140 I would, I think because of the way I grew up or just me, I would choose every wrong thing.

00:31:24.060 If I didn't have this, I'd be dead or I'd be in jail. You know, I'm the type of person who always

00:31:28.840 likes to pick what's wrong for me. Martial arts has given me a discipline. And I think that's a

00:31:33.480 discipline. When you're disciplined enough to do something, you should be disciplined enough to do

00:31:36.660 or not to do something that you know is bad for you. It was also different. I think it's changed.

00:31:42.880 You know, when I left military contracting and I got into Orchard Fire and doing other things,

00:31:49.900 it's really changed because to be training as a contractor, you have to put yourself in a mindset

00:31:55.720 that's very dark. You have to. Otherwise, you're fooling the ones you're teaching.

00:32:00.700 You have to think about what are they going to be facing? And you fight fire with fire.

00:32:05.740 You know, you can't be, you know, it got bad for me in the end because later on,

00:32:09.600 the guys that were teaching started to become kids. I'm like, I'm much older now than these guys.

00:32:14.840 You see youngsters here who were sending and training to be warriors and you can't color

00:32:19.600 code what fighting is. That's why we teach weapons. I'm like, why are you going to be kickboxing?

00:32:24.020 You think the guy in front of you is going to be unarmed? Do you go to war without a weapon?

00:32:29.100 Why is a knife a tool? Oh, I'm not familiar with carrying knives. Yes, you are.

00:32:33.680 You cut your food, don't you? Yeah. You try to pry open stuff with a knife, right? Yeah.

00:32:38.700 So you're very comfortable with that, but you've never thought of it as a weapon. That's right.

00:32:44.240 So if you look at the evolution of man, you look at the cavemen who picked up tools and then evolved

00:32:52.040 to firearms. It's the ones who never know how to use a tool that pretty much went extinct.

00:32:58.260 All the wars in history have been fought with weapons, period. You will never see 2,000 people

00:33:05.100 kickboxing and running around the ground. Somebody ruins the party by showing up with a weapon.

00:33:10.360 You know? So knowing all this, you realize man by nature is violent. It is our nature.

00:33:17.720 So how are you going to be able to control that so you become a better person? Because we know that

00:33:24.040 those that have crossed the line are never the same, ever. So how do you curb that? I think

00:33:29.660 martial arts is one way. I think one of the big missing things we have and a big injustice we're

00:33:35.420 doing to our soldiers that we send out there is we train them to be killers, but we do not train

00:33:40.700 them to become, when they come back, how do you get rid of that? How do you get rid of the adrenaline dump?

00:33:45.620 How do you become normal again if you've actually crossed that line? Once again, I think martial

00:33:51.280 arts is one way to do that. You know, we have so many ways of finding out how to treat PTSI.

00:33:58.900 And I prefer to call it PTSI. It's not a disorder. It's an injury that happened to you when you went

00:34:03.560 out there. So one of the ways to fix that is that, you know, you come back. We've trained you to be a

00:34:10.320 killer. We've trained you to do all the things for your country. Here's a handshake. That'd be normal.

00:34:14.520 No, there's got to be some kind of transition. And I think martial arts is one way because I am

00:34:18.920 still acknowledging you as a warrior. You know, I've talked to some veterans who come back and go

00:34:24.240 like, are you kidding me? I'm so disrespected over here. You don't know what I've done for this

00:34:28.740 country. You don't know what I've had to do to get to where I have to come home. And now I'm just

00:34:33.760 being disrespected. Like what I did over there means nothing. But if you took martial arts to help them

00:34:39.260 come down, what once was a warrior, because by taking martial arts, I still acknowledge you as

00:34:44.380 a warrior, but now you're no longer a warrior of killing. You're a warrior of wisdom. Please come

00:34:49.460 back. Thank you for your service. Here's a way that I acknowledge you that you're still the warrior

00:34:54.020 that you are, but here's a way that the warrior now learns to control the weapons of war. Now you're

00:34:59.800 controlled. You're back in society. You're respected. Here's a way to take care of that. I truly believe

00:35:04.220 that. All right, man, let me hit the pause button on the conversation very quickly. We spent a lot

00:35:09.540 of time during this talk, uh, discussing readiness for violence to both defend against it and also

00:35:15.500 administer it if necessary. Uh, but there's another battle taking place that you need to be aware of.

00:35:20.420 And more importantly, you need to be ready for, and that's the battle for your own level of excellence,

00:35:25.900 because I think most of us know we're operating at a capacity less than we're capable of. And what I

00:35:32.180 want you to have is all of the tools and all of the resources that you need to be ready for whatever

00:35:38.940 life has to throw at you and really tee yourself up for a powerful fourth quarter, uh, as we roll into

00:35:44.060 2022. And that's why we put together a free email course. It's called 30 days to battle ready. We've had,

00:35:51.920 I believe tens of thousands of men go through it at this point. Uh, and when you sign up, you're going

00:35:58.060 to unlock access to the exact strategies that I've developed over 10 years and now been tested for

00:36:05.520 maximum results with thousands and thousands of men. So if you're ready to take your life to the

00:36:10.460 next level, get signed up immediately. Don't waste another day. Let's, let's crush the fourth quarter

00:36:16.680 of this year and roll into again, 2022 with everything that we need to make it the best year ever.

00:36:22.660 You can do that at order of man.com slash battle ready. Again, that's order of man.com slash battle

00:36:28.960 ready. Do that right after the show. Uh, for now, we'll get back to it with Doug.

00:36:34.700 How was your transition out of the, out of the military? You were in the air force. Is that right?

00:36:38.820 I was in the air force, but I was never in combat role. I was not, I was a respiratory therapist. I was

00:36:44.680 a cardiopulmonary. I was already in the medical field doing that. Number one, first of all, air force.

00:36:50.220 Okay. Everybody else is a veteran out there. Go ahead. Share force. Yeah. Okay.

00:36:55.120 No, I don't, I don't get into that. We're smart. We sent our pilots, right? That's right.

00:37:00.620 Yeah. But no, I was in the medical field. That was one of my ways. I think it was also part of my

00:37:05.420 healing. You know, it's a yin and yang. I'm learning an art to destroy. How do I balance that? I learned

00:37:10.860 an art to heal. Yeah. That's interesting. There's also a level of respect. And you mentioned earlier

00:37:15.920 when you were talking about seeing trauma and seeing how, how violence actually physically

00:37:20.720 impacts people and mentally as well. Uh, I think that probably gives you an appreciation for it.

00:37:27.260 And, you know, I always laugh when, you know, I have people in my life, close people actually,

00:37:32.000 who for example, are, uh, against firearms because mostly they're unfamiliar with and they're afraid

00:37:38.220 of them. And to me, I think, well, look, I, I, I still think there's a benefit in, in being able to

00:37:44.380 hold a firearm, being able to use it effectively, being able to know the different components and

00:37:49.560 parts of a firearm. And just because, you know, it doesn't mean you have to use it, but it's better

00:37:52.640 to know it and not need it than to need it and not have it or not know how to use it.

00:37:57.500 I 100% agree. So here's what it is. You're responsible with it. You know, that's one of

00:38:03.220 the things you carry a knife. Do you know how to care for the knife? Do you know how to use a knife

00:38:08.200 and how to defend for the knife? It's the same thing. So with the firearms, when every time

00:38:13.860 anybody gets by as a firearm, I think they have to show proof that they took a course,

00:38:18.480 a complete course on gun safety, on how to use it, how to clean it, everything else.

00:38:23.260 It's, it's responsibility with that. You know, here's a knife. Now go kill something. No, it's,

00:38:29.140 it doesn't matter what's in your hands. It's what you do with it. So the same thing,

00:38:33.440 any kind of thing that you know, it's destructive. You have to take a course. Do you give a kid,

00:38:37.220 a car here now drive it? No, we know we could kill people with the cars. So what does he have

00:38:42.160 to do with driver's ed? Get a driver's license to drive it with a firearm. Same thing. If you

00:38:47.720 take a knife, anything that you do, you have to know complete safety with it. That's called

00:38:52.520 responsibility. You know, a lot of times, once again, if you take martial arts, oh, you know,

00:38:57.140 you're going to know how to beat somebody up, how you can kick box and everything else. All right.

00:39:00.720 First, do you know how to avoid and use verbal judo? Because it's nice that you can kick ass and

00:39:06.820 everything else. Okay. Do you know how to talk to a lawyer? Do you know how to talk to a law

00:39:10.740 enforcement? Do you know how to say your last words to a priest? Because you have these martial arts

00:39:16.480 that you're doing that can end life. So going back to what you're saying, I learned to appreciate life

00:39:22.340 by working in the emergency room. It's very fragile. It doesn't take much. You see your, you see these

00:39:29.080 guys in the movies, they desensitize you. How's that guy still alive? But you know that even a few

00:39:34.240 movements, I lift weights and the next day I'm soaring and bitching about it. Right? Ah, you know,

00:39:38.980 these guys actually fought, you know, the next day they're fine. Same thing here is. Okay. Here's

00:39:44.620 one thing that's very interesting. You know, I, the hitting of the head, how brain trauma concussions

00:39:51.580 are a serious thing where next you can't even function, but we do it all the time over here and

00:39:56.060 think it's okay. You know? So I've seen a lot of headbeats. I saw a guy die because he slipped and

00:40:01.480 hit his head on the floor. Simple, nothing crazy, you know? And so when you see that and you realize

00:40:09.100 how fragile, uh, you understand blood pressure, you puncture an artery. He's gone. If he doesn't

00:40:14.800 know how to stop that, it doesn't matter what you do. I've seen shock in what it does here. We cut

00:40:19.400 everything up. No, I've seen where somebody got caught up in the shock of it. I've seen somebody

00:40:23.880 where they got comfortable and they died because they got comfortable. They were fight or flight

00:40:28.060 till the emergency crew comes in and I'll thank you. Now save me. And then they relax and they die.

00:40:33.600 It's amazing. It's, it's, it's, you know, life is fragile.

00:40:36.860 I like this concept of verbal judo as well. One thing I thought about, as you said that you're

00:40:41.500 talking about talking with a lawyer, talking with a police officer, also potentially just

00:40:45.320 deescalating a situation. Yes. You know, one thing I've seen lately, and I don't know why this pops

00:40:52.120 up. Maybe it's happening more, or maybe it's just more visible because we have cell phones is

00:40:55.580 guys getting into physical altercations at a football game, really a game. And these guys

00:41:02.220 are knocking each other out over a team. They have no part of whatsoever other than they paid

00:41:06.860 a hundred bucks to go watch it. It's just crazy. And I think more men need to learn how to deescalate

00:41:12.040 situations as opposed to, you know, that, that bravado that you were talking about.

00:41:16.260 Yes. 90% of what goes on is a choice. You see 90% of everything you can walk away. It's the fact

00:41:23.980 that you're standing your ground is your ego. Yeah. I'm going to look bad if I walk away. Yeah.

00:41:28.720 I'm a coward if I walk away, but I'm also smart to know that there's a constant consequences for

00:41:32.840 everything that I do. Sure. This guy, this guy wants to push me and he pushes me. And I totally

00:41:38.260 stabbed him 10 times because he pushed me. No, he pushed me. Okay. You win. I walk away.

00:41:43.900 You see, unless it's really total. Now I'm not saying it's right for us to totally give up our

00:41:49.760 principles, but way, way the principles. You see, here's the thing. If I'm with my family and

00:41:55.760 I'm in, and they're put in danger, I have no questions of what I'm going to do. But if I'm

00:42:00.400 alone or why would I even put myself in danger? Like the football game, let's say for that, for

00:42:05.980 example, right? Here's a guy because they're, they're squabbling over teams and everything

00:42:09.980 else. I'm going to get into a fight. Something happens to me. Who's going to take care of my

00:42:13.580 family right now? And not just saying, you know, tomorrow I got to go to work. Now I'm

00:42:18.440 injured. Who's going to pay for the food on my table? You have to really think out the

00:42:22.720 costs and consequences of everything that you do. When you go to martial art class, we're

00:42:27.520 in, you know, a lot of times in Filipino martial arts, we're like, oh, great. Here we are training

00:42:31.100 with weapons and everything else. My teacher goes, okay, now let's ask this question. How the

00:42:35.040 hell are you standing in front of someone with a stick and three knives? How'd you get to

00:42:39.360 this point? Good point. Oh, you're right. And how the hell are you? How did you face

00:42:44.980 someone with a weapon too? Shouldn't you have run? So I'm like, so what's the point in all

00:42:49.340 this? That's my point. The point in all this is, this is training. This is going to places

00:42:54.180 where you've never been. So if it ever happens to you, you know what to do, but we have to

00:42:58.740 practice the, Hey, screw you. Okay. Bye. Oh, I'll beat you in a fight. Yes. You win. We

00:43:05.160 don't practice that. That's part of the thing. Practice humility, practice saying,

00:43:08.820 in your mindset in actuality, I'm saying, yeah, you're right. Or God bless you, sir. Well,

00:43:15.280 I hope you have a good day in your mind is saying, I don't want to kill you because I

00:43:19.700 don't want to go to jail. So that's in your mind, telling your ego that to shut up. But

00:43:24.680 in actuality is I don't want to have to hurt somebody else because once again, it's a matter

00:43:31.080 of you putting yourself in a state to where I have to be better in life, not bitter. I don't

00:43:36.880 want to get into fights because I know that there's no, no one wins. Not even if I win,

00:43:42.000 I have the consequences to deal with. Yeah. And you know, you can, I think you can tell

00:43:47.760 somebody who's genuinely afraid or a coward versus somebody who chooses not to engage.

00:43:52.880 There's a different, there's a different approach. There's a different mannerism, you know, though

00:43:56.820 the outcome may be the same, the fight or whatever doesn't happen, but you can tell somebody who's

00:44:01.080 capable and chooses not to engage versus somebody who's incapable and therefore runs away from any

00:44:07.320 sort of confrontation, whether it's something like this, or even just standing up for yourself

00:44:11.400 to your employer or having a deep conversation with your wife about something that isn't comfortable

00:44:17.240 to address. Yeah. It's once again, when two, and I think there's also, you're right. I mean,

00:44:23.380 just because I backed down, doesn't necessarily mean that I'm afraid of you. Yeah. Look, obviously

00:44:29.080 there, like I said, the deescalation is a matter of when two people, you know, when you show up and

00:44:32.520 you point a gun at me and I pull a, I point a gun at you. It's like, Oh, or your arm too. Okay.

00:44:36.980 Maybe we should think this out. Same thing with the deescalation. Hey, screw you and everything

00:44:41.280 else. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Can I buy you a drink? What can I buy you a drink? Well,

00:44:48.040 just deescalate all of a sudden, you know, but you're like, dude, I don't want to get into a fight.

00:44:53.700 I don't know you enough to want to fight you. You don't know me to want to fight me. So do we even have to fight?

00:44:59.740 Or yeah. Okay. Hey, you know, blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, dude, you have your son there. It's a

00:45:05.340 good looking kid. I don't, why am I going to fight in front of your son? I don't need to do this. Or,

00:45:09.860 or maybe like this. I've got HIV. I don't want to bleed all over you. What?

00:45:16.960 You know, I don't want to infect you. I've got COVID. I don't know.

00:45:26.440 How do you game playing? If you can, and here's a good thing. Also strategy. If you can learn to

00:45:31.460 make it humorous, even better. Yeah, definitely. Yeah. That's a great deescalation

00:45:37.900 tactic for sure. How do you go from, uh, do it, doing your work in the medical field with

00:45:43.760 respiratory and all of that to, okay, now I'm on, you know, forged in fire and I'm a, I'm a weapons

00:45:49.040 expert and martial artists. Like that seems like quite the leap and I'm sure it didn't happen one

00:45:53.840 single leap, but I'm very interested in that process and how that all came about.

00:45:57.200 I actually started doing a lot of, um, so I was always a respiratory therapist. That was my job

00:46:03.520 that paid the bills, but my passion was always on the side. I always trained. And a lot of my

00:46:08.060 students were either instructors in other fields, um, law enforcement, um, military. And then I ended

00:46:13.820 up meeting up with an old student of mine was now doing military contracting. So he, we got to learn

00:46:19.620 to do military combat, uh, combatives with what I was doing. Um, when I was doing that on the side with

00:46:25.800 and we actually landed a very big account to take my team overseas, uh, and for a two-year contract

00:46:33.820 that was paying a lot of money to do what I loved and that I almost sold my soul for that. Thank God

00:46:40.180 I didn't do it. Uh, things change. I really believe in that God's way was the right way, but, um, I was

00:46:47.200 working in a hospital, but then I was offered this opportunity. They're building the place for us to

00:46:52.860 train, taking my team, my guys. I go, who'd quit here just to do what we're doing to get paid this

00:46:57.260 much money. And it had to be at least three times what I was making in the hospital. And it was,

00:47:03.320 so I prepared to do that. Now, while I was ready to take off, um, we were told that it's eight months

00:47:09.660 away. It's the site's not built. Well, what I quit my job already. I'm ready to leave. Then fortune fire

00:47:16.000 came about. And, um, I'm like, well, you know, I'm going to do this while I'm waiting for that

00:47:21.360 contract. All right, good. I go and do that. And then things happened where, uh, while I was doing

00:47:26.720 television, they go, all of a sudden this contract goes, you're not allowed to do. Cause that time I

00:47:30.160 was also doing media with a tactical team on YouTube. Um, they told me you're not allowed to do this

00:47:35.460 anymore. No more videos that you do. Cause I celebrate what I love to put on video, what I do

00:47:39.440 because I celebrate real or not what people go. I don't care. I'm having fun doing it. This is for me,

00:47:44.060 not for you. So I'm putting all this out. So now all of a sudden people, you can't do this. You

00:47:48.620 can't do that. You can't teach these schools because of whatever connections they have. Now they

00:47:53.100 want to own me. So I'm like, no, and it's a dark place that you're going to go. I think I'll stick

00:47:58.860 to fortune fire. I was blessed. So this is what you're talking about. Uh, you didn't sell your

00:48:04.360 soul. Is that, is that what you're referring to? Yes. Because if I had went, I had been teaching the

00:48:09.400 wrong people. I would teach it for the wrong reasons. Um, it's the things that were attached

00:48:15.660 to it was all for money, the control factor. And those who went even without me came back

00:48:23.060 with a very bad deal. They were not the same. They, they ended up suing each other. It was

00:48:27.980 like, well, that's what you get for going without me. They tried to take it away. Even the way

00:48:33.740 it was done was all wrong. Yeah. Sounds like there was some red flags there that you made

00:48:39.160 that made a good decision. A lot of red flags, but I was blinded and I was going to do it

00:48:44.620 for the money. I'm blessed that I didn't. What was it that kept you? Was it, you talked

00:48:50.620 about God's path or God's God's decisions for you, but what, what was it? Was there something

00:48:56.240 specific that really stood out? We're like, Hey, I'm not going to do this. Or was it just

00:49:00.480 the fact of them feeling like, are you feeling like they were going to own you? He gave me

00:49:05.760 opportunities elsewhere and he showed me those that went and did it. What happened to them?

00:49:13.700 That was a big thing. And then you start to see things happen. I used to go to the shot show.

00:49:19.040 And when I was there, I met with different groups and, um, you're learning about the cost,

00:49:24.320 you know, who you were actually selling your soul to and what they're doing. So it was, yeah. So,

00:49:29.720 you know, like, I'm like, wow. Uh, and now how do I remedy this? You know, then I'm like,

00:49:35.740 I'm teaching them. Hey guys, you need to know that I, my guys over there are teaching them this.

00:49:40.480 You need to know this too. This is what I gave them. Here's the program learning to counter.

00:49:45.520 Well, it sounds like you're glad that you'd listened. Uh, I can't tell you how many men,

00:49:49.660 including myself who have had these red flags and had these, you know, premonitions and,

00:49:54.140 and even conversations with God and have decided, well, now I'm still going. And then you've

00:49:59.640 regret those decisions that you make, you know, because I was selfish, you know, I was selfish,

00:50:05.920 but it's, I think the blessing is that, well, okay, we know you're a selfish guy. Um, here's

00:50:11.420 an opportunity. We don't want to do fortune fire. Now this is going to save you and your family.

00:50:17.200 So, okay. Now all the things that were doing the other, we were all negative. It was,

00:50:21.660 it was wearing on my family. Um, my, my marriage, it was wearing on the sacrifices,

00:50:26.800 even my relationship with my kids. I would have been gone. I would have not seen them.

00:50:31.300 Right. Right. So, but I was willing to do that. I was willing to do that. Why? That's why I say

00:50:37.420 I wasn't willing to sell my soul for doing something else. So I wasn't weighing that instead

00:50:42.000 opportunities were put in front of me to where I'll give you this opportunity to do this instead,

00:50:47.080 but learn from it, please. And that's what it did. Or to learn from this. Um, I gave away my health

00:50:53.920 touch, you know, there's one thing about working in the medical field that I miss. And that's

00:50:58.160 when you're, when you're seeing something, it's what I do is about breathing. So either

00:51:01.600 where they put a tube in your lung, it connects you to a breathing machine, or you've got asthma,

00:51:06.020 you know, your airway, your breathing and all this, that's my job. And I get immediate

00:51:10.720 satisfaction. I can put a BiPAP. And when your heart's full of fluids and I got to get that out

00:51:15.100 so you can breathe, your lungs are full of fluid and everything else backing up. And then,

00:51:18.360 and they don't want to thank you because in the old days you put on a breathing machine. I used to

00:51:21.680 fight to not put them on that because I know there are ways to do it with modern medicine.

00:51:25.580 Now, not just to jump into that, you know, and it's always a triumph. But at the end of the day,

00:51:29.400 they're like, I was here four hours ago. Now I'm going home normal. It's a great feeling.

00:51:34.060 Where do I get that feeling now that I'm on TV? That's why I have my morning podcast,

00:51:38.700 my, my Facebook, my, my morning talks. Right. That's why I refuse to, to call out people on what

00:51:45.360 they're doing. Oh, what you're doing will never work and everything else. Nah, good for you.

00:51:48.340 That's what you love. This is what I love. Is it real? I don't care. I don't know. I'm not

00:51:51.740 killing anybody. I'm just having fun with it. I tried to look at the positive and stay with that

00:51:55.680 because the one gift now that I have is media. The one gift I have a following. What am I going

00:52:00.720 to do when I meet my creator? When I die, do a Kali video. Here's the demo of the weapons I did.

00:52:06.400 Here's some killing stuff. Is that what I got to do? I said, when he asked me, what are you going to do?

00:52:10.360 I took that away from you. I gave you this, show me what you're going to do good with it. All right.

00:52:14.940 So I'll be positive and talk and try to do good by it.

00:52:19.700 What type of good do you feel like you are doing? You know, what is it that you feel like you add

00:52:23.280 enhanced to people's lives where when you meet your creator, you can show them that instead?

00:52:29.280 Number one, try to stay humble, but I love doing what I do, but in my morning talks with morning

00:52:37.020 coffee with Marcaida, I've gotten so much mail from people. This is the weird thing. You never

00:52:44.220 really know what you're saying and how it's going to affect people. Media will do that. They put you

00:52:49.140 on a pedestal. It's weird. I told you in the beginning, I did it as a lark because I want to

00:52:53.480 do my morning coffees on Facebook live. So my kids could watch me when they go to school. Hey,

00:52:57.540 here's dad. And they'll do that. But it turned into something bigger than that. All of a sudden,

00:53:02.360 people were writing me with their deep problems. I had people who were on dialysis, on cancer

00:53:08.840 treatment, who would tune in. And for them, what I would say would totally be totally taken a

00:53:13.640 different way. And for me, that was heavy. I'm like, and I wrote them, I'm not a Dr. Phil. I'm

00:53:18.280 not qualified to do this. All I'm talking about is something that happened in my life and I have fun

00:53:21.720 with it. And they go, well, we don't care about Dr. Phil. We care about you. So what you say speaks to

00:53:27.420 us in a different way. And from that, I've had so many, it really is meaningful to

00:53:32.340 a lot of people. And I don't know what it means, but the one thing I do love to hear is I so needed

00:53:38.140 this today. And then they'll tell me the reasons. And I'm like, wow, that's not even where I was

00:53:42.440 going with what I just said, but it's taken that way. That's all that matters. And that's where I

00:53:46.820 believe that God speaks to people, hopefully through me or guides me. Because I don't even

00:53:51.240 try to plan what I say. I just say, okay, let me tell a story about this and what's my take on it.

00:53:55.720 And that's it folks. But I will not try to get into politics, religion, and all this because

00:54:01.060 I'm like, look, the news is already, you know, out there. It's negative.

00:54:06.000 That stuff's covered.

00:54:06.660 You can get on that. Yeah. You want to get depressed and angry and everything else go to

00:54:10.280 somebody else's page, not here.

00:54:12.760 So I want to ask you a question in this, I'm trying to figure out the way to word it. And I'm

00:54:17.540 trying to say this with all due respect that you deserve. When you have the opportunities that you

00:54:22.440 do, let's say Forged in Fire, for example, you know, there's other individuals, it could have very

00:54:26.980 easily been somebody else. So what do you attribute them choosing you to be part of that? And because

00:54:34.100 I think there's a lot of guys out there who, you know, want to make it big in their own right. And

00:54:40.060 they want these incredible opportunities. Why did you get that opportunity?

00:54:44.940 I often ask myself the same question. How did I get into this? Because there was nothing

00:54:51.320 special opportunity. I think once again, it's a given opportunity. I didn't ask to be, it was

00:54:56.000 presented to me that way. They like my personality. I am not the most skilled person. That's number

00:55:02.300 one. Number two, I'm not an expert in everything. How there are some weapons we put in this particular

00:55:07.540 show that are not even created anymore. They're ancient. There were no manuals on it.

00:55:12.800 Also, it's not a weapon that I get to use all the time. You know, that's one thing that people

00:55:18.700 understand. When you're given a gun to shoot, you get to sight it in. When I test these weapons,

00:55:23.100 I pick it up. It's the first time I've ever picked it up. And people don't realize what it feels like.

00:55:27.660 Now, these are sharp weapons made to kill. So my job is to try to test these weapons as equal as

00:55:35.620 possible. And a lot of them don't understand the balance and the movement. I may not even perform as

00:55:41.780 well as I want to, but I'm not supposed to because it's not about me. It's about the weapons

00:55:46.100 we're testing. I'm a judge on this. I'm cutting things that aren't attacking me. That's not

00:55:50.920 martial. You just stand there and I just cut it to find out the differences because I have to find

00:55:55.980 which of these weapons are the best, period, according to the way it feels in my own standards.

00:56:02.620 So no, there is nothing special about what I'm doing. I just happen to have a way to understand how

00:56:09.940 to use them and get a result that's even. I use the basic common sense of if it's got a point,

00:56:15.920 it should be able to thrust or penetrate. If it's got an edge, it should be able to lacerate or cut.

00:56:20.240 The balance is the difference. I have to understand that who's going to carry this to

00:56:24.000 battle. If I had a choice, what's better? What feels good in my hands? Understanding the feel and

00:56:28.940 all that. Anybody, another expert can do this, but I do have a following. I think that's a blessing

00:56:36.180 there. I think it wasn't until the fourth season when I actually tore my shoulder using a bad media

00:56:44.620 and a very heavy and blunted sword that I realized my place on the show because previously to that,

00:56:51.900 our judges had, one of our judges had, the original judges, our master smith had a surgery on his

00:56:57.620 wrist. So they replaced him with another master smith and he left and they replaced him with another.

00:57:01.860 So I figured, okay, well, I tore my shoulder and he's going to need surgery. And I went to my

00:57:06.080 producer and I go, can I at least pick my replacement? Somebody that I know is very similar

00:57:10.900 and understands this because safety is an issue here. You just don't want anybody to cut stuff,

00:57:14.540 right? And he goes, you do have students, right? I go, yeah. Well, let them be your arm.

00:57:20.560 Huh? But I'm just going to stay there with a sling and everything. He goes, Doug, you're more than just

00:57:25.080 the guy who cuts stuff. Don't you know that? No, I don't know that. I don't know that. He goes, yeah,

00:57:31.340 that's what you are. And you'll continue to be that way. And that's when I realized my place on the show.

00:57:37.320 I'm the guy with the saying.

00:57:39.280 Yeah. That's that. What is the saying? What is that? There we go. I was looking for it.

00:57:44.420 Well, the funny thing that people understand is when we did this, uh, when we were to the pilot,

00:57:49.500 we didn't know what we're doing. It's a brand new show and I'm the end user. They're going,

00:57:53.500 we need an end user. So that's what it is. Now, what kind of tests can you do? Then they go,

00:57:57.640 well, we're testing for sharpness. Okay. Well, sharpness test. Okay. Now we want to make sure

00:58:01.640 the weapons is strong strength test. What else? Well, these are weapons of combat. So we should

00:58:06.760 have a kill test, you know? Okay. We're going to put a kill test. I'm like, what's a kill test?

00:58:11.920 You know? And like, guys, my contracting stuff, we actually cut up carcasses. You know, we dress them up,

00:58:18.060 we cut them and everything else. Can we do something like that? And they're like, uh, how do we do that?

00:58:22.340 It's like, okay, this is what we do. You make a pole, put some sticks out and wrap it with pork.

00:58:26.620 You know, we'll tie it up. So in our pilot, we had a meat man and I was cutting to show what meat

00:58:31.400 and just got. So when we actually did the show, we actually had carcasses, you know, dress them,

00:58:36.180 you know, whole carcasses. So that's a kill test. Now it's a pass or fail. If it will, if the weapon

00:58:40.500 should kill. So the way I'm saying it will kill it will, but I have an accent. So my Philippine accent

00:58:45.780 comes out when I get so excited. And I think in one episode, I had so much excitement with cutting with a

00:58:51.060 weapon. I go, it'll kill, you know, so excited. And people caught on to that. Now we didn't know

00:58:57.680 who our audiences were going to be at that time. I thought us, it's like Spike TV, right? I figured

00:59:02.100 college kids, you know, I found out there was a family show, a lot of dads and their kids and

00:59:09.720 families, moms, you know, grandpa watched the show. Then I'm like, wow. And I see it will kill.

00:59:14.920 And actually they like to kill. I'm like, all right, then let me make a play on words. On my

00:59:20.480 website, I have this motto. It's not about how many you hurt, it's about how many protect. That's

00:59:26.040 talking about responsibility, what you have. Just because you're doing arms training doesn't mean

00:59:30.920 that you're out to hurt anybody. It's about how many to protect. So I turned that into an acronym.

00:59:35.920 And kill, K-E-A-L means keep everyone alive. So at least when we say that, and when I sign it to

00:59:44.580 kids and everything else, it says, this will keep everyone alive. Being, you know, a little bit more

00:59:50.180 responsible with the words of, and a play on the words that we put out there.

00:59:54.020 Yeah. You're right about the family show version of what you just said is because me and my boys,

00:59:59.080 we watch the show. We love it. You know, it's entertaining. It's fun. You learn a bunch of new

01:00:03.080 stuff. So when I told them that I had the opportunity to talk with you, they were so

01:00:07.040 excited about it. They were so excited. I told them this morning, Hey, cause mom's out of town.

01:00:11.680 So I'm like, Hey, you guys need to be good. I'm going to get on the phone with Doug. They're like,

01:00:15.180 wait, Doug. So they were really excited about it. That's awesome. Well, I'll make sure to say hi

01:00:19.960 later on to those guys. Yeah, please do. That'd be great. You know, one thing I love about the show

01:00:25.020 is that I'm making memories and I, you know, because we're going on to our season nine next week,

01:00:29.580 we start season nine over 200 plus shows. And one of the things that I've in my age now that I

01:00:35.820 actually like watching are these old TV shows that I grew up watching when, and then I started to do

01:00:42.060 fun stuff on Tik TOK. Yeah. Right. Yeah. I'm there too. Right. Okay. Terrible. But it makes people

01:00:47.880 laugh because I've got, you know, I like to make people and the comments from the kids who were on

01:00:52.380 there are always saying, man, I used to watch this with my grandpa. I used to watch this with my dad,

01:00:56.920 or I used to watch this, you know, as kids and everything else. I'm like, wow, I'm actually

01:01:00.720 making memories with other people that when I'm dead and gone, somebody's going to look at this

01:01:05.720 and go, I used to watch that guy, you know, when he was doing stuff or one day he's going to go see

01:01:11.460 that old man. And then I'll be in a nursing home, that guy in a wheelchair playing with his poop,

01:01:15.620 piece of it will kill guy. No way. You're you're definitely part of their legacy, which is really

01:01:21.980 interesting because you never know how much your work and your words are going to actually impact

01:01:27.460 people that you'll never meet. Absolutely. You know, it's what we do with our time outside of

01:01:33.200 the show. And that's where I try to really reach out and do things. You know, we do some charities

01:01:40.400 and some nice things. It's what you do with it because you can't get away from the culture of being

01:01:48.060 a personality. You think you're one way, but you're always taking a different way. And that's

01:01:53.900 just the way it is. So what are you going to do with it? How are you going to be a role model? How

01:01:58.060 can you impact people in a good way with that kind of power? Yeah. Well, that goes back to what you

01:02:04.600 were saying. If you have that knowledge or you have that information or skillset, you also have the

01:02:09.500 matching responsibility to use it effectively for yourself and other people. Absolutely. Absolutely.

01:02:15.660 Well, Doug, I appreciate you joining us. Like I said, I was really looking forward to this

01:02:20.080 conversation. And one thing I got to say, and just to compliment you on is your level of humility

01:02:25.880 that you have in your life is really inspiring to me and it helps me to be a better person as well.

01:02:33.180 So I've enjoyed our conversation. Of course, I've enjoyed watching you with the boys and looking

01:02:38.280 forward to getting this conversation out to the guys who listen. My pleasure. I'll say this when I

01:02:43.180 started to do the media was a beautiful lesson that my wife always told me to always ask yourself

01:02:51.920 this, who are you in the eyes of God? You're nobody. Ask yourself always that no matter how high you

01:02:58.280 think you are, who are you in his eyes? So humble yourself. Great way to keep you grounded.

01:03:05.400 Absolutely. She's the first one to cut me down. And I love it. The first one. There you go again,

01:03:10.380 trying to think, you know, there you go. Use your narcissistic ways. You're thinking you're not.

01:03:15.140 They're right. And they are, they are right. And they are good for us.

01:03:19.600 Absolutely. Thank you, brother. Appreciate it.

01:03:22.380 My pleasure.

01:03:25.440 All right, you guys, there is my conversation with the one and only Doug Markaida. I hope that you

01:03:29.620 enjoyed that. I really didn't know when we scheduled the conversation, how it would go. I was looking

01:03:34.880 forward to it, but I'm really glad that it went in the direction that it did. And it showed me a new

01:03:40.060 depth to Doug that I wasn't previously aware of. And it really helped me see things in a different

01:03:45.360 light from not only how I lead my family and my children, but how I look at violence and why it's

01:03:51.440 important to address this. And then also making sure that our martial arts is not just about violence,

01:03:57.920 but the other lessons and frameworks and mindset that we can get from engaging in martial arts in

01:04:05.300 many different forms. So if you enjoyed this one, you want to connect with Doug,

01:04:09.780 hit him up on Instagram, hit me up on Instagram. Let us know what you thought. Take a screenshot of

01:04:13.480 the podcast, share it. That goes a long way. And if you also want to do another solid for us to get

01:04:19.020 this out to more people, and this message of reclaiming and restoring masculinity does need to go to

01:04:24.000 more people, then please leave a rating and review wherever you listen to podcast. iTunes is best

01:04:29.200 because that's the largest as of now podcast platform. So if you can leave us an iTunes rating

01:04:34.660 and review, I think we're at almost 7,000 reviews. We really need to bump that up to 10,000 and get

01:04:41.080 over that 10,000 mark. And if all of you just jumped on real quick, took 90 seconds, we would be to that

01:04:48.200 10,000 mark within a matter of hours. All right, guys, that is your call to action. In addition to the

01:04:53.720 Battle Ready program, connect with Doug, connect with me. We'll be back tomorrow for our Ask Me

01:04:58.180 Anything. But until then, go out there, take action and become the man you are meant to be.

01:05:03.240 Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your life

01:05:07.600 and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.

Order of Man - November 09, 2021

DOUG MARCAIDA ｜ Tempering Violence Through Skill and Familiarity

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