Order of Man - October 25, 2023


Eliminate Emotional Reaction, Testosterone Replacement Pros and Cons, and Proving Your Worth ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING


Episode Stats


Length

53 minutes

Words per minute

187.54945

Word count

9,956

Sentence count

843

Harmful content

Misogyny

5

sentences flagged

Hate speech

11

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we discuss the importance of being courageous in the face of adversity and how to be tactically and emotionally courageous in making decisions that may or may not be a good one. We also discuss the benefits of being a leader who is willing to make unpopular decisions.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.
00:00:05.880 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.
00:00:10.220 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong.
00:00:15.120 This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become.
00:00:19.240 At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.
00:00:24.440 Kemp, what's up man? So great to see you. Glad to be back for another Ask Me Anything today.
00:00:28.220 Fielding questions, I believe, from the Facebook group that we didn't get to last week, if I understand correctly.
00:00:33.720 That's correct. From the Facebook group to join us there, go to facebook.com slash group slash order of man.
00:00:39.460 And you can participate in future AMAs.
00:00:43.980 Better place to do it is the Iron Council, because not only are you going to participate in AMAs,
00:00:49.440 but all the other discussions and conversations and channels and regional meetups.
00:00:54.060 We had Mitch just hosted a hunt this last weekend. Sounds like it went really well.
00:01:00.640 I just heard from Johnny Loretty. He and his team have a meetup coming up in the Boston area early next year.
00:01:07.900 I believe I think it's May of next year. So these guys are not only getting together digitally and connecting that way with proven systems and results and brotherhood and accountability,
00:01:17.600 but they're actually connecting face-to-face, which is our vision. That's what we wanted.
00:01:22.480 It's perfect.
00:01:23.720 Yeah, man. It's working.
00:01:24.860 It's working.
00:01:25.460 The ball is rolling forward.
00:01:26.700 My plan is working.
00:01:27.920 Yes.
00:01:28.820 World domination.
00:01:32.020 Soon. Soon, my brothers. Soon.
00:01:35.540 All right. Should we jump into it?
00:01:37.420 Let's get to it, man.
00:01:38.160 All right. Dustin McDan, how to be tactically courageous as a leader making unpopular decisions because it is the right thing to do in the moment of that dynamic situation,
00:01:50.080 but knowing that in time said decision may or may not work out, kind of like making decisions during the fog of a war concept.
00:01:58.540 Yeah. I mean, I don't know if we need to reframe this as some new phenomenon.
00:02:03.220 Yeah, your decisions might not work out.
00:02:04.660 That's life. That's the courageous part. You said tactical. What do you say? Tactically courageous.
00:02:13.820 It's just courage. I don't even think we need to say tactical courage. Courage is doing something that may actually put you in harm's way.
00:02:22.600 So if there's a fire and you know there's a baby inside and you run in, that may not work out. You may die.
00:02:31.720 That's the risk.
00:02:32.600 That's the courage component.
00:02:34.660 If there was no risk to it, it wouldn't be courageous.
00:02:37.920 So yeah, it may not work out. And I think we just come to terms with that. And we have to calculate if that's a risk we're willing to take.
00:02:44.940 If there's a baby in a burning building, I would hope, I don't know because I've never been presented with this situation.
00:02:50.220 I would hope I would weigh that very quickly and make the decision to go in and try to rescue that baby.
00:02:54.520 But that's a decision that we have to make.
00:02:57.620 If it's a business decision, yeah, you might pour tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars into a project and, you know, didn't work.
00:03:06.460 So we can mitigate our risk though.
00:03:10.600 Yeah.
00:03:11.240 Yeah.
00:03:11.420 And so if we take the burning building analogy, if I were to get myself an air tank and a respirator and run in there, my likelihood of surviving would increase.
00:03:21.480 If I had flame retardant clothing on and I ran in there, my likelihood of surviving would increase. 0.98
00:03:28.100 If we're talking about a business investment, tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars, if I were to hire a coach who's walked other businesses through this criteria, through this scenario, my likelihood of it working would actually be increased.
00:03:43.300 So we do want to hedge our bets.
00:03:44.720 That's why we invest in coaches and mentors and resources and training and everything else that we can to make sure that when we do make a courageous choice, we do it with as much stacked in our favor as possible.
00:04:01.320 Totally.
00:04:01.860 Totally.
00:04:03.060 I have nothing to say.
00:04:04.980 Good stuff.
00:04:06.140 Man.
00:04:06.540 Bob Ross has the next question.
00:04:09.320 I stumped him.
00:04:10.760 What's that?
00:04:12.240 I've reached the pinnacle of podcasting.
00:04:14.720 I said something and tip's like, I don't have anything else to add.
00:04:18.000 This is it.
00:04:19.100 Let's just end it.
00:04:20.580 Yeah.
00:04:21.020 I'm just giving the people what they want to hear.
00:04:22.840 That is just rapid fire.
00:04:24.560 Let's just hear Mickler's responses.
00:04:26.580 You're right.
00:04:27.380 No.
00:04:27.980 And there's value in us not repeating what's already been.
00:04:30.800 I mean, solid.
00:04:31.520 Of course.
00:04:32.160 Right.
00:04:32.660 So Bob Ross, when faced with decisions that can involve emotions like buying or selling a home,
00:04:39.840 what skills do you employ to keep emotions out of the equation and make the best possible decisions?
00:04:46.580 Time is a good resource.
00:04:48.700 Yeah.
00:04:49.320 Usually when we're confronted with something, our first natural inclination is to base our decisions
00:04:55.160 on emotion.
00:04:55.720 So if you can extend the timeframe a little bit, you're more likely to make an informed decision
00:05:01.900 because you can sit back and you can see what else is going on.
00:05:05.280 You allow your, the other parts of your more developed brain.
00:05:09.000 This is scientific, by the way, your more developed brain to take over and to put the
00:05:12.860 logical side of things.
00:05:13.920 We have that reptilian brain and the mammalian brain, right?
00:05:17.400 The reptilian brain is known for making rash, emotionally-based decisions based on survival.
00:05:24.880 And then you have that mammalian brain, which is more logical, more rational.
00:05:28.940 But if you look at the evolution of human beings, our reptilian brain is, is the oldest,
00:05:35.340 most core component of our, of our brains.
00:05:39.040 And so that's what takes hold first.
00:05:41.100 So if you can give yourself some time, I think that's important.
00:05:45.160 We mentioned it in the previous question with regards to resources.
00:05:49.700 If I'm selling a house, for example, Kip, and I trust you and you have some credibility
00:05:54.680 in the department and I call you up and I'm like, Hey man, here's the deal.
00:05:57.060 I'm thinking about selling this home and here's the rate and here's what I'm doing.
00:06:00.820 And here's what I'm going through.
00:06:02.280 You as an individual are not emotionally vested in my decision-making process.
00:06:07.380 Now you're a friend, sure, or a colleague or a coworker or a coach.
00:06:11.480 So there's a little bit of vesting, but not nearly to the same degree that I have.
00:06:15.840 So you can see things.
00:06:17.400 Let me give you an example.
00:06:19.100 This is why when you're having relationship issues, you can go to your friend and say,
00:06:23.320 bro, you're a dumbass. 0.99
00:06:24.580 You just need to do X, Y, and Z.
00:06:25.760 And he knows because he's not emotionally vested in your decision-making process.
00:06:31.460 It's your emotional decision-making process.
00:06:33.440 That's clouding your judgment.
00:06:35.220 Why is it so clear for us to see somebody struggling and say, dude, just do A, B, and C.
00:06:39.680 You're done.
00:06:39.960 You're fine.
00:06:41.500 Why can't he see that?
00:06:43.420 Because he's emotionally vested.
00:06:45.040 Emotionally tied to it.
00:06:45.780 Yeah.
00:06:46.080 Yeah.
00:06:46.500 So just go find people who are, who are your friends who want the best for you.
00:06:51.060 And they're not emotionally tied to your decision-making process and ask them for feedback.
00:06:57.500 And, and then listen, even though it might sound like it goes against every fiber of your
00:07:02.540 being, maybe just listen to it.
00:07:04.460 There's only one other thing I would say to this is just listen to intuition.
00:07:08.680 I mean, we're talking about this reptilian brain and listen to your intuition.
00:07:12.640 If your intuition is telling you this doesn't feel right, this is off, be careful, warning
00:07:18.460 lights.
00:07:19.440 It's okay to listen to that.
00:07:21.060 It's, you know, you don't need to always have a logical answer for that.
00:07:25.500 And, and sometimes just you being intuitively aware of what you're feeling or experiencing,
00:07:32.300 even though you can't quite put a finger on it is enough.
00:07:34.920 Yeah.
00:07:35.460 Just that gut check mentality.
00:07:37.840 I always feel too, like whenever I've made bad decisions, I feel rushed.
00:07:42.780 Hmm.
00:07:43.520 Like it's like, it's a rushed thing.
00:07:45.700 And, and if I feel pressured, I will just call, I'll call it, I'll go, nope, I'm not going
00:07:52.600 to be rushed into this decision.
00:07:54.780 And it, cause I know if I just give it time and if it's, if it's the right thing, then I'll
00:08:01.040 execute when it's, when it, when I don't feel rushed.
00:08:03.260 But if I'm rushed that that's kind of like the, the side I use of like, no, no, no.
00:08:08.360 I I'm being maybe too emotional about this, or I'm, I'm being pressured or too excited
00:08:13.420 about it or whatever.
00:08:14.400 Cause you'll notice that a lot of time, and I don't know the, the logic or the idea around
00:08:19.840 this, but sometimes when we make emotional decisions, it's almost like, we got to do
00:08:23.740 it now.
00:08:24.160 We got to do it now.
00:08:24.940 Right.
00:08:25.420 And it's like, and there's no reason to be rushed.
00:08:28.740 And it's because of those emotional feelings we want to execute on.
00:08:32.980 So that's, that's the scarcity mindset.
00:08:35.300 I think kicking in Kip is, you know, if you have a quote unquote investment opportunity,
00:08:40.040 let's say a friend calls you and is like, Hey, I got this investment opportunity.
00:08:42.940 You're like, cool.
00:08:43.880 Can I sit on it for a day or two?
00:08:45.380 No, we need by 7.
00:08:46.760 Never going to have night.
00:08:48.520 Like, this is it.
00:08:49.580 We need to have it now.
00:08:50.880 You're like, Oh shit.
00:08:51.620 If I don't do this, I'm going to miss out.
00:08:54.940 And that's, and that will never come again.
00:08:56.960 Yeah, it will.
00:08:59.200 The deal that whoever's presenting you is not as great as they're making out to be.
00:09:03.600 It'll happen again.
00:09:05.920 This one, if they're rushing you, I had a friend who used to say, if it's a good deal today,
00:09:11.260 it'll be a good deal tomorrow.
00:09:12.940 You know, yeah, you might miss out on some things.
00:09:15.880 I went with someone this weekend to a home Depot and she was getting some new hardware
00:09:21.420 for her cabinets.
00:09:22.680 And, uh, she's like, Oh, you know what?
00:09:25.160 I think they miss mark these.
00:09:26.240 So I'm going to go get them.
00:09:27.540 And, and she went and they had updated the price to the, to reflect the accurate price.
00:09:32.640 But a day or two earlier, it was $3 less for each handle.
00:09:36.040 So she would have saved about 35% on each one of these handles. 0.99
00:09:40.240 She's like, I should have done it.
00:09:42.260 Yeah, maybe, you know, but okay.
00:09:44.740 So you're out $3 times.
00:09:46.480 What'd you need?
00:09:46.900 10 handles.
00:09:47.560 You're out 30 bucks.
00:09:48.520 So what, you know, in the grand scheme of things, it's fine.
00:09:53.500 And I only illustrate that point to say, you're going to probably miss on some things, but
00:09:57.580 that's okay.
00:09:58.620 It's really okay.
00:09:59.720 Other opportunities will present themselves.
00:10:01.680 Yeah.
00:10:01.940 Chalk it up to learning.
00:10:03.180 Yeah, exactly.
00:10:03.900 Yeah, totally.
00:10:05.780 All right.
00:10:06.480 Dirk Harma for TRT.
00:10:09.660 Do either of you use anything?
00:10:11.560 What do you use?
00:10:12.500 What is the process?
00:10:13.440 How did you go about said process?
00:10:15.640 I'm 34.
00:10:16.640 I've had my testosterone levels checked and it's in below 300s.
00:10:21.580 I've tried supplements and they didn't work.
00:10:23.660 I've heard a lot of people on podcasts say that veterans and first responders are susceptible
00:10:28.780 to low levels of tests, low levels.
00:10:31.680 I'm both.
00:10:32.500 I lift weights, work out regularly.
00:10:34.800 I do not follow a specific diet, but I stick to the protein and vegetables.
00:10:37.940 Most part, I just don't know where to start.
00:10:40.680 Also, I don't know how to determine if some of these male clinics are a scam or if they're 0.52
00:10:45.660 legit.
00:10:47.320 Yeah.
00:10:48.080 So I, I personally take testosterone.
00:10:50.560 Do you, Kip?
00:10:51.760 No, I haven't.
00:10:53.120 I haven't even done my, my blood panel work yet.
00:10:56.060 That's the first step.
00:10:57.020 Like one of the things that is on my list.
00:10:58.880 I'm like, I need to get that done.
00:10:59.980 I don't even know.
00:11:00.880 Yeah.
00:11:01.280 Yeah.
00:11:01.560 That's the first step.
00:11:03.000 It's that, which is measured improves.
00:11:05.520 We know that.
00:11:06.600 So if you want to know where you're at, the first thing you need to do is go get it measured
00:11:10.040 and you can go to what I would suggest is if you're worried about these male type clinics 0.99
00:11:14.960 that promote this testosterone stuff, just go to independent, independent resource.
00:11:19.160 Uh, there's a great one called any lab test.
00:11:21.500 Now that's where I get my testosterone checked.
00:11:23.880 Yeah.
00:11:24.260 I walk in, they draw my blood.
00:11:26.160 Um, I get the results in a day or two and it's, they're not tied to it.
00:11:30.500 They're not making money off of selling me testosterone.
00:11:33.180 It's completely independent.
00:11:35.100 And then I take that.
00:11:36.620 In fact, I actually did it today.
00:11:37.960 I, I, cause I, I had my blood drawn, uh, last week, got the results, uh, this, this
00:11:43.800 morning, Monday morning, sent them off to Johnny Loretty.
00:11:46.200 Who's in the iron council.
00:11:47.020 I said, Johnny, tell me what you think of this.
00:11:48.840 And my testosterone, when I started this about a year or so ago, roughly, it was down in
00:11:55.820 the low, in the mid two fifties, which is significantly deplenished, uh, depleted.
00:12:00.540 It's, it's, it's, it's not where it needs to be.
00:12:02.700 Um, so what I would suggest to you first and foremost is before you start doing testosterone
00:12:08.480 injections, uh, I would really look at ways that you can boost testosterone naturally.
00:12:13.740 And I'm not saying this will always yield the results, but there's some things that you
00:12:17.480 can do.
00:12:17.960 So proper sleep is crucial.
00:12:20.420 Your diet is crucial.
00:12:21.940 There's so many, uh, preservatives and androgen blockers in not only what you're consuming,
00:12:26.860 the plastics and the hormones and the bullshit that you're eating, but also the soaps that 0.60
00:12:31.540 you're putting on your body, uh, the plastics that you're consuming through, if you pour water
00:12:36.260 into a plastic water bottle, the, the androgen blockers that are in, in the plastics, you're
00:12:41.720 actually consuming those.
00:12:42.760 So that's not going to allow, and I'm not an expert on this, but the way I understand
00:12:46.540 it is that testosterone to bind to your cells, to allow your body to process it correctly.
00:12:51.940 So those are called androgen blockers or disruptors as I've heard both terms.
00:12:56.300 Um, so diet, exercise, uh, nutrition, sleep, uh, un unnecessary and high levels of stress,
00:13:08.100 because then that increases your cortisol levels, which reduces testosterone development,
00:13:12.580 um, sex competition, all the things that we talked about in the testosterone booster
00:13:18.260 t-shirt that everybody wants their minds about.
00:13:20.520 That's all I made this shirt and it was like, Oh, I can't believe I'm like, that's just
00:13:24.980 scientific data.
00:13:26.280 I just said it in a way that pisses you off, but that's scientifically proven to be the
00:13:30.280 case.
00:13:31.160 So we called it our T booster and it was like, eat me, compete, lift heavy things, sleep,
00:13:37.740 have sex, be a man. 0.90
00:13:39.780 Yeah.
00:13:40.260 And it was like, Whoa, I love that.
00:13:42.800 I can't believe lost their day minds over it.
00:13:47.560 Um, but this is what you need to do as a man.
00:13:49.840 So do that, uh, for a period of time, you can't do it for a week and think that everything's
00:13:54.380 going to improve, but really consider your, your lifestyle, go to a third party place,
00:13:59.420 like any lab test now, or, or something else.
00:14:01.940 I'm sure there's another, another place you can go to.
00:14:05.300 Uh, and then I wouldn't necessarily, I mean, yeah, you can talk with your physician, but
00:14:10.120 I don't really know that your physician's the best place for this, but I would ask around
00:14:15.040 and I would try to find a reputable source.
00:14:16.740 I have a place here in Southern Utah that I go to highly recommended.
00:14:20.760 A couple of my other friends have used this specific doctor.
00:14:24.060 Uh, and I've been happy with those results, uh, in, in a period of six months, it went
00:14:27.720 from two 50 up to gosh, seven, seven 50, seven 20, somewhere right in there.
00:14:33.740 And where should you be at typically around seven?
00:14:37.160 Uh, 800.
00:14:38.400 I think it goes up to 1100 if I understand correctly, but 800, 1100, I mean, age just,
00:14:43.720 this is a natural progression of age as well.
00:14:46.940 But, but if you look at testosterone rates for men today versus men 50 years ago for calculated
00:14:53.100 for age, there's drastically reduced, totally drastically reduced.
00:14:57.860 And that has to do with our lifestyle and the things that we're diets and all kinds of
00:15:01.500 crap.
00:15:01.880 Yeah.
00:15:02.580 Sedentary lifestyles, all of this sort of thing.
00:15:04.460 So that's what I would suggest.
00:15:07.280 Yeah.
00:15:07.400 If you don't mind me adding to your recommendations of like natural sources, the reason why just
00:15:14.620 think through that, give the list of all the natural things you can do and then ask yourself
00:15:19.700 whether your testosterone increased or not, would it be beneficial for you to be doing
00:15:24.520 all those things?
00:15:25.280 And the answer is yes.
00:15:27.020 Yeah.
00:15:27.160 So don't shortcut yourself.
00:15:29.440 Right.
00:15:29.720 And, and that's, we rob ourselves whenever we take a shortcut, we rob ourselves from
00:15:34.540 the opportunity of growth and development.
00:15:37.280 And there's, there's value in the hardship of, wait, hold on, Ryan, you may get some good
00:15:43.200 sleep and work out and do, geez, that's too much.
00:15:46.560 Let me just inject, right?
00:15:48.040 It's like, dude, you're robbing yourself from the chance of, of leveling up in a very serious
00:15:52.760 way by doing those things first.
00:15:55.380 And, and then if they're not working, then pivot.
00:15:58.380 And also if you're taking testosterone supplementation, it's only going to be enhanced by you working
00:16:04.740 out, by you sleeping, by you competing, by you doing all the things that we talk about.
00:16:08.780 So if you're going to, that's what you'll hear a lot of guys, you'll see rip guys and
00:16:12.560 people say, well, you're on, you're on testosterone, bro.
00:16:16.640 If all it was is testosterone, then every man on the planet would take it.
00:16:21.480 And we'd all, yeah, they're still working out and putting in the reps.
00:16:24.620 Of course.
00:16:25.680 So don't tell me that if I could sell you a pill and you'd have six pack abs in the next
00:16:31.280 two weeks, you wouldn't take it.
00:16:33.640 Of course you would.
00:16:35.360 You're what you're doing is you're complaining that somebody put in the work and you're
00:16:41.600 discounting it because they're taking testosterone.
00:16:44.140 Like that's the thing that put them over the edge.
00:16:46.980 And if you think about it, most of those guys are, they're, they're excusing something,
00:16:52.700 right?
00:16:52.940 They're like, well, you know, it's that it's, it's can't be all this hard work that you're
00:16:56.800 doing.
00:16:57.120 I don't want to give you credit for that.
00:16:58.520 You know?
00:16:59.280 So there's one other thing to be aware of with testosterone.
00:17:01.940 There's research that suggests that if you begin to take testosterone, your body's ability
00:17:07.680 to create testosterone for itself.
00:17:10.260 And don't quote me on this.
00:17:11.500 Cause I'm not a doctor on this stuff.
00:17:12.720 I've heard the same talk with somebody, but your body's ability to naturally produce
00:17:17.720 the testosterone levels that your body needs will become diminished.
00:17:21.500 And in some cases never actually begin to work again.
00:17:25.200 So it's, it's a commitment.
00:17:27.540 Like if you're going to do it, you're, you're in the game.
00:17:30.500 It's a commitment.
00:17:31.280 Yeah, totally.
00:17:32.600 Yeah.
00:17:33.080 And I totally get Dirk's question because like some of the guys I know that are on
00:17:39.020 TRT, I swear, like the, the, the guy that's hooking them up, it's almost like they're,
00:17:46.540 they're TRT physicians.
00:17:48.560 They're, they're not like looking at the full paddle and discussing all these things.
00:17:53.440 They're just straight up like, yep, it's low.
00:17:55.900 Let me get you TRT.
00:17:57.100 Right.
00:17:57.420 And they're just, they're just drug dealing.
00:18:00.800 No, it's true.
00:18:01.640 So here's what I would say is again, use a third party for testing, use a reputable clinician.
00:18:08.020 Think about where your testosterone is coming.
00:18:09.920 If you're ordering it from, from Mexico overseas, that's a red flag. 0.99
00:18:14.040 Yeah.
00:18:14.480 I get my testosterone from the pharmacist.
00:18:17.080 Like I drive down to the pharmacy.
00:18:19.360 My doctor calls in a prescription and they, yeah.
00:18:23.380 And they, yeah, we're going to vet horse tranquilizers.
00:18:27.440 And that's why I'm so jacked clearly.
00:18:30.040 Like a horse.
00:18:31.960 Yeah.
00:18:32.280 And then my pharmacist who's licensed and reputable and credible gives me the prescription.
00:18:39.060 Like there's, I'm not buying it from Canada or China or something.
00:18:43.800 Be, be smart.
00:18:45.380 Uh, full disclosure, full disclosure.
00:18:47.740 Obviously you already said like, you know, talk to your physician.
00:18:50.560 Um, what, any, any, any side effects that you've experienced?
00:18:54.440 Like, cause I've, I've, I've gotten a handful from guys and I'm curious if you're, uh, if
00:19:00.260 you're getting any.
00:19:00.780 I, I, I, when I started taking it a while ago, I did my, my emotions.
00:19:06.900 Yeah.
00:19:07.300 My emotions were dysregulated.
00:19:09.380 It felt like, I felt like I was more emotional than I had been in the past.
00:19:13.240 I was like, wait, I thought this was supposed to help me be a man, like not be more emotionally
00:19:17.080 charged, but I was.
00:19:18.820 Yeah.
00:19:19.540 Uh, and I think a lot of that had to do with, I was take doing testosterone, but I wasn't
00:19:24.220 doing the other work too.
00:19:26.160 Got it.
00:19:27.140 So that, that was part of it.
00:19:28.920 Um, yeah.
00:19:30.420 So mood, moodiness, I think was, was something I dealt with.
00:19:33.660 Um, libido obviously goes up, you know, sex drive. 0.99
00:19:37.960 Um, I think for me, and I don't even consider this a side effect necessarily, but like, I
00:19:45.100 have to be active.
00:19:45.960 I have to be engaged.
00:19:47.100 You know, I, I, I want to go work.
00:19:49.740 I want to go walk.
00:19:50.780 I want to go do something.
00:19:51.920 I want to be physical.
00:19:52.740 I want to go for a run.
00:19:53.880 I want to go to the gym.
00:19:54.820 I want to, like, I don't want to be like, live the sedentary lifestyle.
00:19:58.780 I don't think that's a side effect.
00:20:00.160 I think that's actually a feature.
00:20:01.900 Yeah, totally.
00:20:04.180 Totally.
00:20:04.660 So that's what I experienced.
00:20:06.160 Cool.
00:20:06.800 All right, Dirk, there you go, man.
00:20:09.160 All right.
00:20:09.680 Adam Beachy, how do you grow a small side business from 12 K in revenue to 50 K?
00:20:17.680 I run a 3d printing business selling items on Etsy, and I want to expand off onto my own
00:20:23.360 website.
00:20:24.160 I also wanted to get my foot in the door at manufacturing companies to work with them.
00:20:28.880 Any advice on how to reach out and start that relationship?
00:20:32.180 I mean, really to grow your revenue, you can only do one of two things.
00:20:35.120 You can increase your prices for current customers, or you can pick up new customers at your current
00:20:40.020 pricing or a combination.
00:20:41.480 Yeah, it's really all you can do.
00:20:43.900 So what I would suggest at this point, and we'll talk about the manufacturing relationships,
00:20:47.920 but what I would suggest at this point is the first thing you said is Etsy.
00:20:52.160 I don't know about Etsy.
00:20:53.820 I don't know.
00:20:54.720 That's not a platform I'm on.
00:20:56.040 I don't know about Pinterest.
00:20:57.040 That's not a platform I'm on.
00:20:58.120 Where I am is Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook and YouTube.
00:21:02.720 And if you're doing 3d printing, I think something that's heavily visually driven, like Instagram
00:21:08.860 is probably going to be your best bet.
00:21:11.200 And if you can learn to use, yeah, if you can learn to use Instagram in an effective and
00:21:15.180 powerful way, I think that's going to help you just exponentially increase your business.
00:21:20.760 I'll sit on Facebook sometimes and I'll watch, it was funny.
00:21:24.320 I was watching a, I think it's called bourbon moth woodworking or something, bourbon moth
00:21:30.800 woodworking.
00:21:31.600 The guy is incredible.
00:21:33.260 He makes this beautiful furniture and shelving.
00:21:36.720 And yesterday he was upgrading his, the video I watched anyways, was him upgrading his table
00:21:42.740 saw.
00:21:43.320 And he made this like beautifully like wood inlay.
00:21:46.280 It was, it was amazing.
00:21:47.580 Yeah.
00:21:48.060 And the way that he edited the video was compelling.
00:21:50.760 And interesting.
00:21:51.860 And I'm like, I want to do that.
00:21:53.820 I want to be a woodworker now.
00:21:56.780 And so I had two thoughts.
00:21:57.900 I'm like, I want to do this myself or I want to hire this guy to build something for me.
00:22:01.640 Yeah.
00:22:01.980 And that's the power of using social media.
00:22:04.460 So what I would suggest, I don't know what you're printing, but I would suggest going
00:22:07.380 to wherever your audience is.
00:22:08.880 If you're printing, I don't even know.
00:22:13.680 Well, I don't know.
00:22:14.420 What do people print?
00:22:15.120 I don't, this isn't a world I'm familiar with.
00:22:17.100 What do you print?
00:22:17.720 Do they 3d print?
00:22:19.500 I don't know.
00:22:20.800 Most people I know, it's like a, it's almost like goofy stuff just to be fun.
00:22:26.600 Oh, here.
00:22:26.880 I got a good, I've got a good example.
00:22:28.180 Okay.
00:22:28.400 So I've got a sheep skull right up here on my, on my, uh, my safe over here across from 0.99
00:22:33.340 me.
00:22:34.160 And I went to a Western hunting expo that I go to every year in Utah.
00:22:38.960 Uh, it's in February or March of every year.
00:22:41.360 And there was a booth there and the guy will take yours, a skull of an animal that you shot
00:22:48.000 and then he'll, he'll scan it, however he scans it.
00:22:52.620 And then he'll 3d print it in a different size.
00:22:55.820 So he'll shrink it down to one, six size or whatever.
00:22:58.840 And so he's 3d printing these things.
00:23:00.580 The reason that I bring this guy up is he's printing animal skulls and he's at the hunting
00:23:07.340 expo.
00:23:07.440 Like imagine him being at the craft, the, the, the knitting women of, you know, America 0.62
00:23:15.240 and he's showing these women 3d skulls that he's like, it doesn't make sense.
00:23:21.060 Yeah.
00:23:21.920 But that's what we do.
00:23:23.180 We go online and we're like, Oh yeah, I'm printing these 3d printing for everybody.
00:23:27.220 Yeah.
00:23:27.940 Nobody cares about that.
00:23:29.260 There's a very select few people who care about it.
00:23:31.920 And that select few is a big enough pool that you could actually make a very, very lucrative
00:23:36.440 business from, but you have to go exactly where that is and talk exactly to those people.
00:23:41.760 To your point, if you go out and you talk to everybody, nobody, nobody cares.
00:23:46.460 So a great example of that is what we're doing here.
00:23:48.740 Order of men.
00:23:49.680 I'll post something online and somebody, a woman will come in and say, well, this applies 0.97
00:23:53.240 to women too.
00:23:53.920 Well, of course, like we're talking about principles that apply broadly to men and women.
00:23:58.880 There are some things that we talk about that are exclusively reserved for men, but for
00:24:02.500 the most part, like what we talk about also applies to women. 1.00
00:24:06.440 But I don't talk to women. 1.00
00:24:07.580 And some people say, well, but you're excluding half the population.
00:24:10.400 Yep.
00:24:11.400 Yep.
00:24:12.400 Because I want to make sure that I, the way that I talk, the way I communicate, the way
00:24:16.640 this podcast studio looks, the words I'm using, the imagery that I'm, that I'm employing
00:24:21.100 speaks to my audience, which is men.
00:24:24.220 And then we break it down even further.
00:24:25.740 And you and I went through and we pulled out some demographical data from income level
00:24:30.620 to occupation, to, uh, how many kids, to marital status, to place they live, the hobbies and
00:24:36.660 interests they're engaged in.
00:24:37.800 Cause I want to speak to those people.
00:24:40.020 And I know that over 50% of the men who listen to this podcast are between the ages of 25 to
00:24:46.780 45.
00:24:47.160 So do I need to focus on 15 year olds?
00:24:50.080 No.
00:24:50.960 Do I need to focus on 65 year olds? 0.97
00:24:53.140 No.
00:24:53.740 Are we going to pick some up?
00:24:54.740 Probably.
00:24:55.800 But my main demographic is 25 to 45 years old, because I know these are the individuals
00:25:00.920 I'm speaking with.
00:25:02.120 So, which allows you to provide better content and provide a better service.
00:25:08.460 Yes.
00:25:09.300 Yep.
00:25:10.100 What was the question about manufacturing relationships?
00:25:12.360 Um, so he says, um, I want to get my foot in the door at manufacturing companies to work
00:25:18.360 with them.
00:25:18.940 Any advice on how to reach out and start that relationship?
00:25:22.540 What I would have.
00:25:23.400 Okay.
00:25:23.560 So here's what I would do.
00:25:24.880 Let me, let me share a story with you.
00:25:26.980 When I was early in this podcasting space, I had another podcast called wealth anatomy,
00:25:31.680 and it was geared towards helping medical professionals with their financial services.
00:25:35.900 And I really wanted to get featured on a financial bloggers website.
00:25:41.000 His name is Jeff Rose, good financial sense.
00:25:43.500 And I'd been following Jeff for months and I read all of his articles.
00:25:47.000 I knew what he liked.
00:25:48.520 I knew how he presented.
00:25:49.920 I knew how he communicated.
00:25:51.640 I really resonated with the guy.
00:25:53.400 And I thought it'd be really cool if I wrote an article for Jeff and then I just promoted
00:25:58.700 my podcast because now he's going to take that and he's going to promote that to his
00:26:03.460 audience because it's a value to his audience.
00:26:06.480 So to be clear, you wrote valuable content that he could use and republish for his audience
00:26:15.680 group.
00:26:16.380 Got it.
00:26:16.560 Yeah.
00:26:17.060 Now, the way that most people will do this is they'll reach out to somebody like Jeff
00:26:21.180 and they'll say, hey, I would like to write an article for your website on X, Y, and Z.
00:26:25.280 What do you think?
00:26:26.640 Yeah.
00:26:27.460 Wrong approach.
00:26:28.300 What I did is I said, hey, Jeff, I wrote a 1500 word article on X, Y, and Z.
00:26:36.080 I can't remember what it was about.
00:26:37.780 And I already wrote it and it's attached to this email and it's catered to your audience.
00:26:44.060 And I remember specifically making a few jokes and little cracks at In-N-Out restaurant because
00:26:49.000 I know Jeff loves In-N-Out.
00:26:52.140 Yeah.
00:26:52.540 So I put that into the article and I sent it to him and I said, hey, here's the article
00:26:56.940 I wrote.
00:26:57.600 I would love for you to publish it.
00:26:58.880 Hopefully it helps your audience, but also it just gives me a little bit of acknowledgement.
00:27:03.960 Clear on your intent.
00:27:05.020 Yeah.
00:27:05.440 Right.
00:27:06.080 And he wrote me back and he's like, Ryan, this is awesome.
00:27:09.640 He's like, of course, I'll publish this tomorrow because it's content for him.
00:27:14.160 It makes him more credible.
00:27:15.540 It gives me a little boost.
00:27:16.860 It was speaking to his audience.
00:27:19.120 He didn't have to do any work.
00:27:20.420 I went through, I edited it, I cleaned it all up.
00:27:22.580 It had a flavor of his communication style.
00:27:26.500 He's like, man, this is amazing.
00:27:27.560 I can't tell you how many times people want to write for me, but they don't ever give me
00:27:30.500 anything to look at.
00:27:31.440 And you didn't even ask.
00:27:32.380 You just wrote it.
00:27:33.740 And I remember thinking at the time, if Jeff doesn't use this article, I'll just take
00:27:37.840 it somewhere else.
00:27:38.560 That's fine.
00:27:39.160 I'll change out a few jokes, tweak a few words, and I'll take it somewhere else.
00:27:42.880 No harm, no foul.
00:27:44.420 That's the attitude that we have to have when we're going to present ourselves to certain companies
00:27:49.060 or organizations.
00:27:50.420 So to bring this full circle, if you're wanting to work with a manufacturer company, the last
00:27:55.040 thing you want to do is go to them and say, let's say you're the manufacturing company
00:27:58.180 Kip, and I come to you, I send you an email or a phone call or a voicemail or even just
00:28:01.700 drop in.
00:28:02.560 And I'm like, hey, how can I help you?
00:28:04.360 Wrong answer.
00:28:05.300 Now I'm creating more work for you.
00:28:07.140 Right off the bat.
00:28:07.220 And now I have to think and serve you and help you figure out how to help me.
00:28:11.780 Like, you're wasting my time.
00:28:13.440 But imagine this for a second.
00:28:15.580 Imagine I came to you and you sold, let's say, I'm just trying to use our analogy from
00:28:21.160 earlier.
00:28:21.680 Let's say as a manufacturing company, you built mounting hardware for taxidermy and skulls.
00:28:28.980 That's what you did as a manufacturing company.
00:28:30.960 Okay.
00:28:31.740 And I come to you and I said, hey, Kip, you guys are working with hunters across the planet.
00:28:37.840 You're selling brackets.
00:28:38.820 You're selling hardware.
00:28:39.660 You're selling mounting equipment.
00:28:42.220 But one thing I don't see you have is you don't have any way to actually display how these
00:28:47.880 units would work and what they would actually look like with real mounts on them from
00:28:52.580 Tara, New Zealand to bighorn sheep in the high desert to caribou in Alaska and Canada.
00:29:00.840 And lo and behold, I actually have five skulls here and I bought some of your hardware and
00:29:07.140 I put together a quick promo video so you can actually show people what your hardware does in
00:29:12.860 reality and using our 3D skulls.
00:29:17.400 And by the way, people might act, the hunters who are buying your stuff, they might be interested
00:29:22.980 also in 3D skulls.
00:29:25.520 And if this skull, let's say on average, costs $500, I can give you a 20% kickback on anything
00:29:32.440 that you sell through your website because you're already selling to the hardware.
00:29:35.700 Now we just sell replicas of the skulls or the mounts or the horns or the antlers and
00:29:40.680 you get a 20% kickback on all of this.
00:29:44.420 Come on now.
00:29:45.880 That's a different kind of conversation that we're having.
00:29:49.240 We're no longer talking about should we do this?
00:29:51.580 We're talking about how do we do this?
00:29:54.160 And that's how you laid out the value.
00:29:57.000 You probably already have metrics and numbers of like how quick could you make these?
00:30:01.200 What was the cost on them?
00:30:03.260 What the margins could like you just laid it all out and I get a look and go, awesome.
00:30:08.180 Let's do it.
00:30:08.840 Well, how do we do it?
00:30:09.620 Actually, if you could tweak a couple of things, I'm sold, right?
00:30:12.440 Like it's very minimal cycle time for me to evaluate and consider.
00:30:19.540 Right.
00:30:19.560 And if you don't take me up on the offer, I think a lot of people get concerned.
00:30:23.880 It's like, oh, what if I do all that work?
00:30:25.280 Well, that goes back to the tactically courageous thing.
00:30:28.640 Yeah.
00:30:29.800 Yeah.
00:30:30.680 You might do a bunch of work and they don't take you up on it.
00:30:33.120 But how many other companies sell mounting hardware for taxidermy?
00:30:37.260 A thousand?
00:30:38.280 A hundred?
00:30:39.140 Maybe a dozen.
00:30:40.420 Just take it somewhere else.
00:30:41.900 It's fine.
00:30:42.520 It's spot on.
00:30:45.020 I mean, and it's so, and we see this all the time.
00:30:48.340 It's frustrating.
00:30:49.260 I can even think of examples where we want to pitch an idea like, oh, hey, what's this
00:30:54.840 thing?
00:30:55.300 Where's this need?
00:30:56.640 Ryan, tell me how we could help you.
00:30:58.980 You know, it's like, dude, do the legwork up front.
00:31:03.180 Identify the gaps up front and say, hey, we have a solution.
00:31:07.220 It identifies these gaps.
00:31:09.040 This is the benefit to you.
00:31:10.960 Let's roll.
00:31:11.640 And what's going to happen in that is you might be 80% there.
00:31:17.280 But if you explain a gap to me that you're addressing and you're 80%, I'm like, that's
00:31:22.740 great.
00:31:23.600 Could you do a little bit tweaking?
00:31:25.820 And now we have something.
00:31:27.520 Now our barrier of entry is super simple.
00:31:29.980 And what I really love about your letter is they tried you out.
00:31:34.440 By you writing that ahead of time, you got vetted.
00:31:38.900 I'm like, oh, he can write well.
00:31:41.200 Okay, done.
00:31:42.560 And it's flattering, too, to be honest with you.
00:31:45.160 Like if someone wrote something on your behalf and gave it to you and said, hey, what do you
00:31:49.360 think?
00:31:49.620 It's a little flattering.
00:31:51.020 Like you went out of your way and wrote that up for me to consider.
00:31:56.300 Right.
00:31:56.400 Like there's an element of care in there that wouldn't exist otherwise.
00:32:00.740 Yeah.
00:32:01.980 I'll give you a little secret, a little insight.
00:32:04.480 I'm hesitant to do this because I'm sure somebody will take me up on it.
00:32:07.600 But let's say somebody wanted to be an editor for what we did.
00:32:10.700 Like they wanted to write articles or send emails or whatever.
00:32:14.500 They wanted to be an editor for me.
00:32:15.740 You know how many emails I get?
00:32:17.000 I would love and it's just like this.
00:32:19.220 I would love to write a 2,000 word compelling email or article on these seven things like
00:32:27.940 this.
00:32:28.360 I get these every single day, every single day.
00:32:31.100 I get dozens.
00:32:31.860 You know, if somebody just came to me and said, hey, Ryan, like I'd really like to
00:32:36.980 edit for you.
00:32:37.720 But in the meantime, I think I can be a value by transcribing all of your video podcasts
00:32:42.640 into a written form and just send you an email every week.
00:32:45.740 Would that be helpful for you?
00:32:47.520 And they did that for two weeks or three weeks or a month and they did a good job and I saw
00:32:52.760 that it was valuable.
00:32:53.600 And then they came to me and said, hey, has it been valuable?
00:32:55.520 I'm like, yeah, it actually has.
00:32:56.440 I really appreciate doing that.
00:32:57.320 They're like, hey, by the way, I also do articles.
00:32:59.920 Would you be interested in an article per week?
00:33:02.780 Yeah, I would be interested in that.
00:33:03.960 Hey, that, you know, my articles now, admittedly, like my articles, because it's a lot more time
00:33:08.900 for me, they cost 50 bucks an article.
00:33:12.300 Are you comfortable with that?
00:33:13.720 If we were to go that route, you see what I'm saying?
00:33:15.440 Like you're already providing solutions.
00:33:17.760 You're already in the game.
00:33:19.560 I have one of my oldest employees when I had my own consulting firm, he pinged me on LinkedIn
00:33:27.260 and said, hey, give me one project.
00:33:30.540 I'll do it for free.
00:33:32.120 Send me the scope.
00:33:33.360 We don't minimal effort.
00:33:34.880 Send me the scope of what needs to be developed.
00:33:36.660 I'll develop it.
00:33:37.360 We'll review it.
00:33:38.480 And if you like my work, we can do future work together.
00:33:40.820 I was like, all right.
00:33:42.280 All right.
00:33:42.620 Here you go.
00:33:43.520 Dev away.
00:33:44.240 Right.
00:33:44.700 And he did great work.
00:33:45.620 And I was like, awesome.
00:33:47.020 Next project.
00:33:47.920 You know, and it was that simple.
00:33:49.300 Or I have actually had someone take Instagram reels that I've done and then like formatted
00:33:55.960 them to make them look more professional and sent it to me and said, hey, I made this for
00:34:00.140 you.
00:34:00.800 If you ever need an editor for your social media would love your work.
00:34:05.080 And I'm like, and, and I felt obligated to at least post it and tag him, which is beneficial
00:34:12.620 in that right now.
00:34:13.980 I'm like, I really don't have need for your services, but like it was a no brainer.
00:34:17.680 And it was, and it was flattering.
00:34:19.360 I'm like, man, this guy went through a bunch of videos and like did this, you know, this
00:34:23.460 formatting.
00:34:24.080 I was like, that's awesome.
00:34:26.560 You know, I don't know.
00:34:28.400 I, I like this stuff.
00:34:30.120 This stuff's fun to talk about.
00:34:32.080 All right.
00:34:32.260 What's next?
00:34:33.220 All right.
00:34:33.640 Austin Chamberlain.
00:34:35.280 What are some good resources for marketing and advertising for business?
00:34:39.060 I'm starting my business and I have Facebook and an Instagram page, but I don't know how
00:34:43.900 to use the analytics to my advantage.
00:34:46.660 I don't know either.
00:34:47.680 That's not, I can't give you an answer on that.
00:34:49.540 I think you just go hire somebody who does that.
00:34:51.840 Just Google Facebook analytics, watch some YouTube.
00:34:54.960 That's where I would start.
00:34:55.620 I would start with some YouTube videos.
00:34:56.960 If that's of interest to you, get your feet under you a little bit, and then maybe start
00:35:00.900 asking around for some recommendations.
00:35:02.480 But I don't, I don't have an answer to that because I get some coaching on SEO and all that
00:35:06.380 kind of jazz.
00:35:07.320 But if you just Google that, you'll find a resource for sure.
00:35:09.540 But I've heard you say this around provide value, right?
00:35:15.440 But because I do feel like sometimes, look, oh, I got a company Facebook page and I got
00:35:21.380 this and now I just want business, right?
00:35:24.340 Let me just advertise.
00:35:25.300 And I've seen this with you, especially from a podcast perspective, is like provide value.
00:35:31.520 Provide value to people as a strong marketing strategy.
00:35:36.040 Any additional thoughts to that?
00:35:38.340 Or am I off base there?
00:35:40.040 No, you're not.
00:35:40.620 But what I would say with a caveat is provide actual value independent of anything else.
00:35:45.900 So a lot of the times people will add value.
00:35:48.500 The intent is questioned.
00:35:50.080 Yeah.
00:35:50.300 So let me give you an example.
00:35:52.620 Sorry if you guys are in the fitness world, but you guys suck at this.
00:35:55.800 Like you guys absolutely suck at this.
00:35:58.000 So let me just share this with you.
00:36:00.120 If let's say we've got 76,000 guys roughly in our Facebook group and you come in there and
00:36:05.820 you're like, hey guys, like what's the biggest concern you have with your fitness?
00:36:10.620 And then people start commenting and you're like, oh, I gave away a free, I'm giving away
00:36:15.000 a free resource on that.
00:36:16.020 Just DM me the word yes or whatever.
00:36:17.920 It's bullshit.
00:36:19.480 Yeah.
00:36:20.220 Like you're already failing because you're teeing people up and you're being sneaky and you're
00:36:25.600 being manipulative and nobody likes to be manipulated that way.
00:36:29.240 So you either need to be honest, which is, hey guys, I provided a free resource for you.
00:36:35.620 Now, admittedly, it does lead you to my coaching solutions and offerings, but as a standalone
00:36:42.120 product, if you're just interested in dabbling, it's pretty good by itself.
00:36:45.480 But if you want more, I'm available.
00:36:47.120 At least you're being honest.
00:36:48.860 At least you have your integrity intact.
00:36:50.960 And if you're not going to do that, then just say, hey guys, here's 10 fitness tips
00:36:54.500 that I think you could use today.
00:36:55.420 Don't say like, so call me, so DM me, so download my free guide.
00:37:01.620 That's bullshit.
00:37:02.760 Just say the thing.
00:37:04.560 And then if you do that enough and you offer real value just for the sake of offering value,
00:37:09.360 enough people are going to find you.
00:37:11.340 That's how we built Order of Man.
00:37:12.500 I would go into other Facebook groups and I never posted about Order of Man, not only because
00:37:17.180 I'm not going to take a dump in somebody else's house, but because I knew it didn't work.
00:37:22.200 So I'd go into the other Facebook groups and I would see guys asking questions about
00:37:26.040 topics that pertain to men and I would just answer them with my perspective.
00:37:32.180 No, see me for more.
00:37:34.020 No, listen to my podcast.
00:37:35.500 No, download my free ebook.
00:37:37.480 No, just go in there and provide value purely because you want to be valuable and then just
00:37:42.420 let the chips fall where they may.
00:37:44.180 Yeah.
00:37:44.300 And what is that?
00:37:45.300 It's validating that you're a good resource.
00:37:49.660 That's what it is.
00:37:50.580 On sales calls, we'll do demos all the time.
00:37:53.480 My 100% objective on a call is just to help them in the short amount of window of time
00:38:00.580 that I have.
00:38:02.520 And I've been doing this a long time.
00:38:04.760 And trust me, I've had many sales reps go, dude, dude, you're giving away our trade secrets.
00:38:09.180 And I'm like, this is all about building trust.
00:38:13.340 I have 45 minutes with this client to illustrate how smart we are, what we do.
00:38:18.920 And if they walk away 45 minutes, like, man, that was highly effective.
00:38:22.580 And we got some stuff and we're going to run.
00:38:24.640 Awesome.
00:38:25.440 But now they know that we know what we're talking about.
00:38:28.340 And now when they need our help, our expertise and trust has been established.
00:38:34.900 That's what you're doing when you give out that kind of free content.
00:38:38.000 And yeah, yeah, I had a, I'm going to be very careful in the way that I say this, because
00:38:42.720 I know I'm not trying to throw anybody under the bus, but I had somebody reach out a year
00:38:47.440 ago when I was going through like the depths of my divorce and they reached out and they
00:38:52.220 sent me a text.
00:38:53.100 I said, Hey man, how are you?
00:38:54.320 I'm like, man, truth be told, I'm really struggling.
00:38:56.360 Like going through this shit right now and it's been hard and, man, I just feel lost
00:39:01.420 and I'm just struggling and I'll never forget their answer.
00:39:05.320 It was, Hey, if it, if it would be helpful for me to do a free training for your guys,
00:39:09.560 like I could definitely help you with that.
00:39:14.680 What?
00:39:16.100 What?
00:39:17.360 It's funny.
00:39:18.600 It's just, it's, it's not even funny.
00:39:20.800 It's just, I mean, I know what you're saying.
00:39:22.620 It's just, it's pathetic.
00:39:24.280 Like just be valuable in the moment, like read the room, be aware, offer value just
00:39:33.360 because it's valuable.
00:39:34.280 And then know if you do that enough, things will, things will work out.
00:39:37.400 And, and ill intent or question intent has a taste.
00:39:43.000 Yeah.
00:39:43.780 People, they know.
00:39:45.720 So everyone listening are like, yeah, but they're not like as good as I am.
00:39:49.140 No, people know it tastes horrible.
00:39:52.300 Like, yeah, even if it's, yeah, you don't want to deal with people that way.
00:39:57.920 Cause you can't trust them.
00:39:59.220 It's almost erodes trust if someone's questioning your intent.
00:40:02.500 So just be authentic.
00:40:03.460 And if you are doing the hard sell, then say, Hey, here's a hard sell.
00:40:07.740 And, and Alisa, then I'll respect you for being so damn straightforward.
00:40:12.140 For sure.
00:40:12.940 So yeah, don't beat around the bush and that stuff.
00:40:15.240 All right.
00:40:15.580 Christopher Hickman, nothing to ask.
00:40:18.700 Just wanted to say, thank you for your message and consistency.
00:40:21.240 Once again, the principles you've laid out have become the foundation of my life.
00:40:26.700 And I show up for my wife, my daughter, my business, and my community.
00:40:30.960 Keep up the good work.
00:40:32.940 That's awesome.
00:40:33.640 That's why we're doing this.
00:40:35.100 That's what we're all about.
00:40:36.380 So we're helping you or any, any other guy, like, man, I feel good about that.
00:40:41.380 And kudos to you for doing the work.
00:40:43.400 Lots of people listen and don't do the work.
00:40:44.940 You're doing the work.
00:40:45.840 So true.
00:40:47.220 So true.
00:40:48.040 All right.
00:40:48.660 Isaiah Stern.
00:40:49.900 How would you recommend getting over the mindset of always trying to prove yourself
00:40:54.500 to those around you?
00:40:56.600 I feel like I, I always have to be pushing my absolute best and I don't allow myself to
00:41:01.880 rest.
00:41:02.420 I grew up in a household that always shut me down and told me I wasn't enough.
00:41:07.520 This is good.
00:41:08.600 I like this question.
00:41:09.420 I don't know the answer to it though, Kip.
00:41:12.320 I don't know.
00:41:13.240 I didn't, I didn't grow up in a house like that to be, to be straight on that.
00:41:16.840 Like I, I never had that of like this high expectation or demands of perfection or anything
00:41:21.280 like that.
00:41:21.780 My mom was very, uh, understanding and empathetic and nurturing, loving.
00:41:26.320 Yeah.
00:41:26.860 Just kind.
00:41:27.680 Right.
00:41:28.040 And she expected me to, to make good decisions, to make good choices and to live a good life.
00:41:33.340 But as far as the expectation of a certain performance, or I had to validate her love
00:41:37.760 through my efforts, it was never anything like that.
00:41:40.900 Um, I don't know where I adopted that mentality of, of deriving my sense of worth from the value
00:41:45.700 that I provide.
00:41:46.380 I think there's an element of truth to that.
00:41:48.040 But I also believe that, and although I do find it difficult at times, I believe that
00:41:54.420 we are intrinsically valuable as, as human beings.
00:41:58.900 Um, and again, I struggle like that.
00:42:01.200 I know that to be true, but I still wrestle with it because when I show up to do this
00:42:06.300 podcast, I want to be valuable.
00:42:07.840 When I show up in a, in a romantic relationship, I want to be valuable.
00:42:12.160 If I show up in my kids' lives, I want to be valuable.
00:42:16.360 And there's maybe some selfishness to that.
00:42:18.760 You know, that's something to consider is that if you're, if you're always wanting to
00:42:22.720 be valuable to other people, then maybe you're doing it not for their own benefit, but for
00:42:27.260 yours, because you derive some sorts of satisfaction from it.
00:42:31.200 Totally.
00:42:33.120 So I don't, I don't know the answer to that.
00:42:37.520 I don't know.
00:42:38.300 Would you have any thoughts on that kid?
00:42:40.260 I think it's important.
00:42:43.300 All right.
00:42:43.840 Here's a, here's a, here's something to add maybe more thoughts to the question actually.
00:42:49.740 But sometimes when I, when I read about the type of people that are constantly trying
00:42:56.200 to prove themselves, they're trying to prove themselves through something.
00:43:01.200 Right.
00:43:01.400 It's like, you know, I'm going to hold onto this project.
00:43:04.200 I'm going to make it my own.
00:43:05.240 I'm not going to ask for help because like, I'm going to build this thing and I'm going
00:43:08.580 to prove.
00:43:09.480 And everybody's like going to like, think of me better.
00:43:12.660 And a lot of the time, those people fail to realize that it's the person that they are showing
00:43:20.700 up as day in, day out that will get my respect.
00:43:25.060 And all the things that they're doing around the project or the, around the thing is setting
00:43:30.300 them up to not be appreciated and liked.
00:43:34.660 So be very careful that you don't lose yourself in results.
00:43:40.940 Like I talked about this the other week.
00:43:43.700 Sometimes employees will look at them.
00:43:45.440 We'll go, does Ryan have the ability and the skill necessary to do the job?
00:43:49.340 Right.
00:43:49.520 Like, yes, he's highly skilled.
00:43:50.920 Then we'll say, is he working hard?
00:43:52.840 Yep.
00:43:53.020 He works hard.
00:43:53.540 And then we'll, and then we end the sentence.
00:43:55.280 Yep.
00:43:55.480 He's a great employee.
00:43:56.380 No, no, no, no, no.
00:43:57.240 There's a third measure.
00:43:58.700 And that is your impact on those around you.
00:44:01.960 So be very careful that your quest to look good through things, improving yourself doesn't
00:44:09.080 have a negative impact because I think far too often we think it's these results and
00:44:15.720 these other things that will prove our worth when in reality, it's how we got there that
00:44:20.960 determines how we're valued by others.
00:44:25.180 So just be mindful of that.
00:44:26.880 But I think this is a battle because we talk about it.
00:44:30.560 Hey, you need to be a producer, not a consumer.
00:44:34.260 And that's how you provide value.
00:44:35.940 And it's true. 0.56
00:44:36.860 And you need to deliver results, but be careful that you're like, just not out seeking validation
00:44:43.300 from everybody, but yourself or validation from a higher sense of being and not just social
00:44:51.100 acceptance.
00:44:51.580 Cause that could be dangerous too.
00:44:54.720 Yeah.
00:44:54.980 I mean, look, I have to just question our motives when we do things like why, why are you doing
00:45:00.620 what you're doing?
00:45:02.020 Yeah.
00:45:02.580 Is it aligned with like the mission or what we're trying to accomplish as a team versus
00:45:06.260 just you looking good?
00:45:08.220 Well, I guess maybe put another way is would you still do that thing if nobody ever knew
00:45:14.120 about it?
00:45:15.140 Yeah.
00:45:16.000 Like if you, if you told yourself, I'm going to go for a run today and nobody's going to
00:45:20.000 know whether you did or didn't, would you still go do it?
00:45:22.820 And I think the person that you need to prove yourself to the most is yourself.
00:45:27.440 If you can wake up and fulfill all of the commitments that you made today to yourself, I think you
00:45:35.000 can prove to yourself that you're, you're worthwhile, that you're, you're special, that
00:45:39.860 you're important.
00:45:41.000 And that there's a tremendous sense of value in what you do.
00:45:44.720 If it's always commitments to other people, but you're only doing it for praise or accolades
00:45:49.540 or notoriety.
00:45:50.500 I mean, look, there's guys who will like do the dishes and they're like, well, I did
00:45:53.480 the dishes tonight.
00:45:54.140 What do you think?
00:45:54.640 Like, it's cool.
00:45:55.260 Right.
00:45:56.980 It's like, so you're only doing the dishes to get laid.
00:46:01.000 And they're not going to get laid all the time.
00:46:03.260 And then their expectations are going to be, well, and, and it's not always going to work.
00:46:07.320 Sometimes we're going to do amazing things and no one's going to notice or they won't
00:46:11.340 say how amazing it was.
00:46:12.840 And then what?
00:46:13.980 Right.
00:46:14.160 Like, or donating to charity, you know, you'll see people donate to charity or, or leave
00:46:19.460 a big tip and then they'll post about it on social media.
00:46:21.840 It's like, I mean, on what you can make the argument that they're encouraging other people
00:46:28.240 to do the same.
00:46:29.000 I can make that argument and maybe that's true and maybe that will work, but also, or
00:46:33.300 are you doing it?
00:46:34.040 So you'll get attaboys and pats on the back for doing it.
00:46:37.520 And then, then it's about other people.
00:46:39.820 It's no longer about what was right and what was moral and righteous and what you should have
00:46:43.420 done and the work you should have been doing, but what you're going to get acknowledged
00:46:46.600 for doing.
00:46:47.940 It's been very liberating being off social media quite a bit more than I've been in the
00:46:52.080 past because I don't, there's all sorts of things that happen on a daily basis that
00:46:55.980 I don't really feel compelled to share with anybody.
00:46:58.440 And they're good things.
00:46:59.880 Yeah.
00:47:00.540 Because I don't need somebody to say, Hey, Ryan, you're awesome.
00:47:03.200 Cause I'm, I don't, I'm not, but also I don't, I don't, I'm not even going to get
00:47:08.560 into the specifics of what I do, but I'm not going to get into the specifics on social
00:47:12.600 media unless I'm trying to encourage somebody else to do it.
00:47:15.880 Or there's a lesson I think that can be extracted from it.
00:47:18.160 I'd rather just keep it to myself and just like be a good person without having to be
00:47:23.580 acknowledged for it all the time.
00:47:25.640 Yeah.
00:47:26.520 Yeah.
00:47:26.880 You know, I feel, so what I'm hearing what you say is obviously check your intent, right?
00:47:34.280 What's the reason why we're doing it?
00:47:35.860 Making sure that it's in line with not just getting like that.
00:47:40.900 You're, that you're honoring your commitments to yourself first.
00:47:44.440 And that if we are doing something that it's rooted in genuinely helping people and serving
00:47:51.200 others and not, you know, validation, external validation from, from other individuals.
00:47:57.040 And, and with that said, I think it's something that we have to fight for all the time.
00:48:02.120 I remember years and years ago in the iron council, I was, you know, I was battle team leader.
00:48:09.600 And I remember once where I was complaining about the, the team to myself.
00:48:15.720 I was like, man, these guys are all superficial, right?
00:48:18.040 They're not sharing, they're like, you know, disconnected.
00:48:21.160 They're not authentic with each other, right?
00:48:22.820 I wanted more raw discussion within the team.
00:48:28.360 And then I remember thinking like, leaders go first.
00:48:30.860 I'm like, well, what am I, am I doing that?
00:48:33.060 Am I, am I sharing that way?
00:48:35.420 And I came to the conclusion that I had joined the ranks of battle team leader.
00:48:42.580 The original intent was pure, right?
00:48:44.740 I wanted to be on this team.
00:48:45.860 I wanted to serve guys.
00:48:46.760 And over this period of time, I slowly got to the point where I was, I didn't want to
00:48:51.940 be seen as not perfect.
00:48:53.640 I wanted to seek their approval.
00:48:56.520 I, and I lost, kind of lost my way a little bit.
00:49:00.200 And I had to check myself and go, no, no, wait, hold on.
00:49:03.080 Why am I in this role?
00:49:04.820 Is it for me?
00:49:05.580 Is it for me to look good?
00:49:06.460 Is it for anything other than to serve these guys?
00:49:10.160 And I had to adjust how I was showing up because I, I lost sight of that.
00:49:14.620 And I, and so I think it's easy for us to get our egos and, you know, get sideways sometimes
00:49:21.320 if we don't constantly confirm, why are we doing what we're doing and what's the ideal
00:49:26.740 purpose and the mission of, of, of what we're doing.
00:49:30.120 Yeah.
00:49:30.660 Yeah.
00:49:30.960 Agreed.
00:49:31.940 And I, and I also think one, one litmus test that you can use is just don't take credit
00:49:36.500 for anything ever.
00:49:37.840 Yeah.
00:49:38.280 Like, just stop taking credit for things.
00:49:41.940 If somebody pays you a compliment, you know, say, thank you.
00:49:44.600 Like, be gracious about that.
00:49:46.280 Yeah.
00:49:46.760 But I'm saying if there's a team project or something that you've done, or even something
00:49:51.260 that you did in secret, that was good.
00:49:53.960 You don't need to take credit for it.
00:49:55.620 Just, just don't just give credit to somebody else, especially if other people were involved.
00:49:59.260 And yeah, you may have been a big part of that, but you know what?
00:50:02.100 Yeah.
00:50:02.560 The reason this is, this podcast is so wonderful is because Kip does an amazing job.
00:50:06.200 Like I don't need to take credit.
00:50:07.480 And if you're always looking for credit from things, then your, your motives, your intent
00:50:11.600 might be off a little bit, but if there's no, nothing to be gained by doing it, then
00:50:16.540 your motive is a bit more likely aligned.
00:50:18.940 Yeah.
00:50:19.380 Yeah.
00:50:19.880 I like that.
00:50:20.920 I like that.
00:50:21.700 That was our last question.
00:50:22.640 We actually got through all those.
00:50:24.400 Cranked them out, man.
00:50:25.500 All right.
00:50:26.260 Cool, man.
00:50:27.240 We'll just wrap up.
00:50:28.100 So I think the key things, right.
00:50:29.860 We mentioned the Facebook group earlier.
00:50:31.660 You can join us at facebook.com slash group slash order of man.
00:50:34.940 And as always, you can learn about the iron council by going to order of man.com slash
00:50:38.540 iron council.
00:50:39.240 The key thing that we're suggesting people to consider is the open enrollment for the
00:50:44.660 IC won't open until December for starting in Jan one.
00:50:49.280 Right.
00:50:49.720 But if you want to get on that path now and start making some progress, join our battle
00:50:54.500 ready program to learn more, go to order of man.com slash battle ready.
00:50:58.560 And that's a process by which you can kind of in a light version, join us in the iron
00:51:04.620 council and follow some of those systems and processes and start making some progress.
00:51:08.980 And those guys that join the IC are well-prepared to hit the ground running when, when they join
00:51:14.800 us.
00:51:15.240 So once again, that's order of man.com slash battle ready.
00:51:18.420 And of course you can connect with Mr.
00:51:20.560 Mickler on X and Instagram at Ryan Mickler.
00:51:23.800 Do you have any new sweaters still available?
00:51:26.580 The sweaters are available.
00:51:28.120 It's all on pre-order right now.
00:51:29.300 They should be here next week.
00:51:31.540 I'm going to be gone next week.
00:51:32.720 So they'll ship the early part of the following week.
00:51:34.820 So get on it now.
00:51:35.860 Cause I think we're actually getting through quite a bit.
00:51:38.660 I'm not sure how much of a selection we have at this point.
00:51:40.960 Cause we've sold a lot of hoodies, man.
00:51:43.340 A lot of hoodies.
00:51:44.280 So those are bad-ass.
00:51:45.380 So store.orderofman.com is the URL store.orderofman.com for all your order of man swag.
00:51:52.140 That's right.
00:51:52.900 Well guys, I appreciate the questions again.
00:51:54.560 I hope we gave you some things to consider today.
00:51:57.220 Keep the questions coming.
00:51:58.380 We'll try to give you answers as best we know how.
00:52:00.620 And, and like I said today, I'm like, I don't know.
00:52:03.360 I probably said, I don't know three or four times.
00:52:05.940 Cause sometimes I don't, you know, and I'm trying to figure out a lot of this stuff along
00:52:09.100 the way and I stumble and you know, just, just trip up just as much as anybody else.
00:52:16.660 So just keep staying on the path, keep working, keep growing.
00:52:19.820 And, uh, we'll be back on Friday, but until then go out there, take action and become
00:52:23.820 the man you are meant to be.
00:52:25.340 Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast.
00:52:27.920 You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be.
00:52:32.000 We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.
00:52:35.100 We'll be right back.