Order of Man - July 15, 2016


FFN 012： 10 Sure-Fire Ways to Fail at Life


Episode Stats

Length

9 minutes

Words per Minute

203.36702

Word Count

1,965

Sentence Count

167

Hate Speech Sentences

3


Summary

10 Surefire Ways to Fail at Life by Ryan Michler. 1. Making excuses 2. Taking all the blame 3. Working in a team 4. Shifting the blame to others 5. Being the guy who hog s all the credit 6. Working with others 7. Being a team player 8. Taking the blame when things don t go your way 9. Blame others 10. Don t be the guy that takes all the responsibility


Transcript

00:00:00.000 You're a man. You're committed to the work required to forge your own destiny.
00:00:04.600 Your blood. Your sweat. Your tears.
00:00:07.720 You will not be defeated. You cannot be deterred.
00:00:11.480 Nothing stands between you and the victory you seek.
00:00:14.640 You're a rock. Steadfast, resolute, and unwavering.
00:00:18.420 And, at the end of the day, the job will be done.
00:00:22.460 Welcome to your Friday Field Notes.
00:00:25.440 Man, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Michler, and I am the host and founder of Order of Man.
00:00:29.840 I am glad you're tuning in with us, whether this is the first time you've listened in or you've been listening in for a while now.
00:00:35.200 As I'm sure you know by now, this is a show about all things manly, guys.
00:00:38.360 Bottom line, okay, we want you to become a better man.
00:00:41.540 We want to help you be a better leader in your own life, in your family, with your business, with your community.
00:00:46.880 And we do that by bringing you the very best, most practical information that you can actually apply in your own life.
00:00:53.840 Now, if you're new to the show, this is our Friday Field Notes.
00:00:56.660 I ramble, usually, about some lesson I learned throughout the week.
00:01:00.320 It typically lasts between five to seven minutes, but if you're interested in our full show, which is our interview show,
00:01:05.360 make sure you subscribe to the podcast so you never miss any of the interviews that we make available each and every single Tuesday.
00:01:12.000 I have not missed an episode for, I think, 69 episodes now.
00:01:15.480 Now, let's get into the show today.
00:01:16.540 By the way, if you want to dive into this conversation, or any of the conversations we're having about what it means to be a better man,
00:01:21.840 head to our closed Facebook group and request access over there.
00:01:26.200 You can find that at facebook.com slash groups slash order of man.
00:01:30.360 We've got about 5,200 guys or so in the group now, and we want you to be there.
00:01:35.780 I made a Facebook post earlier this week that got a bit of attention, and I wanted to talk with you about it today.
00:01:40.780 It's titled, 10 Surefire Ways to Fail at Life.
00:01:44.080 I'm obviously taking a different approach here with this one, but sometimes it's better to talk about what not to do than what we need to be doing.
00:01:50.760 Now, some of this is going to sound obvious, but here's the deal.
00:01:53.980 You are guilty of a few of these, and if I'm being honest, I'm guilty of a few of these.
00:01:58.340 So I want to break down each one of these 10, and as we do, I want you to ask yourself if you're guilty of doing any of this in your own life,
00:02:05.280 even if it's to a small degree.
00:02:08.020 All right, so here we go.
00:02:08.880 The first way to fail at life, and you've heard me talk about this countless times, is to make excuses.
00:02:16.060 I'm not going to get too much into this, but if you're making excuses in your life as to why you're not getting things done,
00:02:21.640 you are doing yourself a huge disservice.
00:02:25.320 Fabricating excuses, it might appease you temporarily, but at the end of the day, it doesn't do anything to get the job done.
00:02:32.020 And if you're a man, getting the job actually done is top priority, priority number one.
00:02:36.820 Next, taking all the credit.
00:02:40.040 You know this guy, right?
00:02:41.060 He works on a team, but as soon as there's any amount of recognition or praise, somehow it was just him going at it alone.
00:02:48.600 In fact, if it wasn't for his team, he would have been able to do it better and faster, right?
00:02:52.920 Don't be the guy who hogs all the credit.
00:02:55.240 Share the love, and I promise you guys, it will come back to you.
00:02:59.180 Next, and this one goes hand in hand with the last one, taking all the credit.
00:03:02.520 That is shifting all of the blame.
00:03:05.140 Again, when working in a team, this is the guy who blames everything that goes wrong on everyone else.
00:03:11.460 He hogs all the credit, and he shifts all the blame.
00:03:14.660 Look, you have just as much to do with the things that are going wrong as the things that are going right.
00:03:21.180 And if you're working in a team, you should assume your fair share of the blame, if not more, because that's what great leaders do.
00:03:26.820 And it also allows you to fix the actual problem.
00:03:29.880 All right, next, the surefire way, again, guys, to fail at life is to wing it.
00:03:35.720 Now, if you've been listening to me for any amount of time, you know that I'm a guy that takes action.
00:03:39.420 I'd rather take action and flop than sit on the sidelines and do nothing.
00:03:43.840 But that doesn't mean I don't plan.
00:03:45.620 I do.
00:03:46.100 In fact, I plan out every single day, and it doesn't always go according to plan.
00:03:49.740 In fact, it rarely goes according to plan.
00:03:51.460 But you need to have some direction throughout your day, or you're going to lose track of it.
00:03:55.220 You're going to lose track of your day, your week, your year.
00:03:57.480 You're going to lose track of your life, and you're not going to be living the life that you want.
00:04:01.100 So if you want a really good resource for weekly planning, head to orderofman.com slash weekly planner.
00:04:06.800 And you can download the exact weekly planner that I use every single week, every single day.
00:04:12.740 Now, the opposite of what I just talked about winging it is overplanning.
00:04:18.420 You've got to find that middle ground, because if you are overplanning in your life, you're never going to get anything done.
00:04:24.140 This is also where that myth of perfection comes into play.
00:04:26.640 Too many people are waiting for things to be just right before they move forward.
00:04:30.680 The product has to be perfect.
00:04:32.000 The economy has to be perfect.
00:04:33.360 The timing has to be perfect.
00:04:35.040 And while you're waiting around for everything to be perfect, the action takers of the world are launching,
00:04:41.100 and they're providing value, and they're succeeding.
00:04:44.720 So overplanning.
00:04:45.620 Be cautious of that.
00:04:46.780 Next, I want to talk about one that just gets under my skin, guys, and that is complaining.
00:04:50.680 We all know complainers, and not a single one of us enjoys it.
00:04:55.280 And even worse than complaining is complaining without proposing a solution.
00:05:00.420 And that's a huge pet peeve of mine.
00:05:01.900 Teddy Roosevelt has said complaining about a problem without proposing a solution is called whining.
00:05:07.500 Don't be a whiner.
00:05:08.340 If you see a problem, bring it up.
00:05:10.640 You can bring it up.
00:05:11.320 That's not the issue.
00:05:12.280 You can bring it up.
00:05:13.080 But make sure you always propose a solution to the problem that you're bringing up.
00:05:18.720 You'll set yourself apart when you actually come with viable answers and solutions to the problem.
00:05:25.260 All right, the next one, and guys, I've been guilty of this in the past.
00:05:28.020 It's pleasing other people.
00:05:30.140 I used to change everything I said, everything I did, everything I believed in order to please everybody else,
00:05:36.100 in order to make everyone else happy.
00:05:38.320 And the worst part is that it actually seemed like it was working.
00:05:41.600 Everyone around me was happy, but I wasn't.
00:05:45.220 No one is going to respect or look up to a man who continually flip-flops on every issue and every scenario.
00:05:53.000 It's called being spineless or being a coward.
00:05:56.140 You're more likely to gain the admiration and respect of others when you stick to your principles with class and respect.
00:06:04.900 So stop trying to please everybody else.
00:06:07.240 Now, I think a lot of us are guilty of this next one.
00:06:09.560 I'm watching TV.
00:06:12.000 The average American, I was looking at this, the average American watches roughly five hours of TV per day.
00:06:18.600 That is crazy.
00:06:19.820 It's ridiculous.
00:06:20.500 It's like taking on a part-time job just to numb your brain in front of that black electrical box.
00:06:26.320 Look, I get it.
00:06:27.240 All right?
00:06:27.540 You've had a long day.
00:06:28.480 You need to relax.
00:06:29.660 You need to kick your feet up.
00:06:30.840 But if you really need to do those things, read a book or have a conversation with your wife or your girlfriend.
00:06:37.140 You know the things that are actually providing value in your life?
00:06:40.200 Live in the moment, guys.
00:06:41.420 Be present with yourself and those that you care about.
00:06:44.840 Turn that TV off.
00:06:46.060 All right.
00:06:46.240 Now, number nine, going at it alone.
00:06:48.400 We've all heard the phrase, it takes a community and no man is an island.
00:06:52.320 This is absolutely true.
00:06:54.280 Look, I don't have this all figured out.
00:06:56.400 You don't have it all figured out.
00:06:58.220 What you're good at, I may not be.
00:07:00.740 And what I'm good at, you may not be.
00:07:02.940 And this is why it's so important.
00:07:04.380 It's critical to work together with others.
00:07:06.480 Whether that's your spouse or your kids or a business colleague or whoever you need to in order to make sure that things are working right.
00:07:13.540 You're going to be stronger.
00:07:14.720 You're going to be faster.
00:07:15.560 You're going to be more efficient.
00:07:16.340 You're going to be smarter, more profitable, and so much more when you actually learn how to work with others.
00:07:22.100 So stop going at it alone.
00:07:23.140 And the last thing, guys, number 10 that I want to talk with you about today is probably the worst thing that I have seen as of late.
00:07:29.640 And this continues to get worse and worse.
00:07:31.220 And that is getting offended easily.
00:07:33.900 This is a plague on society and a plague to your success.
00:07:37.500 And the reality is, is that it's taking over the world.
00:07:41.260 You cannot say anything without someone getting offended.
00:07:44.980 But taking offense does nothing to serve you.
00:07:48.960 It just makes everybody else mad.
00:07:50.160 Now, I know that there are those out there, guys, that lack tact and they lack class.
00:07:56.380 I know that there's those out there who really don't care about the wreckage that they cause when they're dealing with you or anybody else.
00:08:02.460 We need to stop taking offense about everything.
00:08:05.940 Worry about yourself.
00:08:06.960 Worry about what you're doing.
00:08:08.000 And you will be much better off.
00:08:10.580 So there it is.
00:08:12.200 Ten surefire ways to fail at life.
00:08:15.300 Making excuses.
00:08:16.800 Taking all the credit.
00:08:18.380 Shifting all the blame.
00:08:19.460 Winging it.
00:08:20.040 Overplanning.
00:08:21.180 Complaining.
00:08:22.100 Pleasing other people.
00:08:23.740 Watching more TV.
00:08:25.200 Going at it alone.
00:08:26.780 And getting offended easily.
00:08:28.760 So your marching orders for this weekend and for your life, frankly, are to purge those things from your life.
00:08:35.340 And do the exact opposite.
00:08:36.700 And success, guys, will be all but yours.
00:08:40.100 So if you want to learn more about how to implement all the things we talk about on this podcast, including eliminating the activities that are destroying your chances of success,
00:08:48.880 you need to join me and the 100 plus other men that are doing more than just talking about being better men.
00:08:55.500 We're actually doing something about it.
00:08:57.720 We meet every single week online to talk about money and relationships, fitness, nutrition, business.
00:09:03.200 And specifically this week and this month, we're talking about a topic that applies to every single area of your life.
00:09:09.840 If you get good at this, every area of your life will improve.
00:09:13.420 And that is the topic of communication.
00:09:16.160 So learn more about our elite mastermind, The Iron Council.
00:09:18.720 You can do that at orderofman.com slash ironcouncil.
00:09:21.160 I hope to see you there.
00:09:22.320 But until next week, guys, take action and become the man you were meant to be.
00:09:27.720 Those are your Friday Field Notes.
00:09:29.540 Now it's time to crush your excuses, own your choices, accept responsibility, and live manfully.
00:09:35.800 Learn how at orderofman.com forward slash field notes.