Order of Man - FFN 028： Complacency Kills

00:00:00.000 You're a man. You're committed to the work required to forge your own destiny.

00:00:04.600 Your blood. Your sweat. Your tears.

00:00:07.720 You will not be defeated. You cannot be deterred.

00:00:11.480 Nothing stands between you and the victory you seek.

00:00:14.640 You're a rock. Steadfast, resolute, and unwavering.

00:00:18.420 And, at the end of the day, the job will be done.

00:00:22.460 Welcome to your Friday Field Notes.

00:00:25.120 Men, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Michler, and I am the host and founder of Order of Man.

00:00:29.480 If this is your first time here, I want to welcome you to the manliest podcast available.

00:00:33.860 We talk about everything from leadership to being a better father and protecting yourself and your loved ones

00:00:38.880 to dressing better, getting in better shape, staying motivated,

00:00:41.900 just about any other topic that is important to us as men.

00:00:45.200 Now, I'm sure you know by now that this is our short show.

00:00:47.280 It's released each Friday. It's called our Friday Field Notes

00:00:49.560 because essentially what I do is I take my thoughts and my notes throughout the week

00:00:53.920 and I share them here with you today.

00:00:56.420 Now, a lot of people ask me where I come up with topics for the show.

00:00:58.720 I get inspiration everywhere, guys, but specifically, a lot of what I talk about

00:01:02.940 comes from the conversations, the hundreds, if not thousands of conversations

00:01:06.800 that we're having in our closed men's Facebook group.

00:01:09.340 If you haven't checked that out, I don't know what you are waiting for.

00:01:12.260 By the time that you actually go request to join us,

00:01:15.140 we will probably have cracked the 10,000 men mark inside of that group.

00:01:19.120 So, if you're interested, head to facebook.com slash groups slash order of men.

00:01:23.260 And also, I just want to let you know, again, if you don't already,

00:01:26.320 that we release an interview show each Tuesday with the world's best performers,

00:01:30.860 whether that's business or the military, sports, in every element of their lives.

00:01:34.980 So, just subscribe to the show and then you'll never miss either of the two shows

00:01:38.600 that we share and we put out each and every week.

00:01:40.640 And of course, make sure that you share this podcast with your dad, your brother,

00:01:44.900 your coworker, your son, your friend, any man who wants to level up in his life

00:01:49.020 the way that you want to level up in yours.

00:01:50.780 Now, I want to talk about a topic that each and every one of us slip into,

00:01:55.640 including myself now and then.

00:01:57.260 It's this world of complacency that we have a tendency to fall into.

00:02:00.620 Someone asked me the other day what the biggest mental hurdle or struggle that I deal with.

00:02:04.740 And if I'm being truthful, it's complacency.

00:02:07.480 I get going really, really well in one area of life.

00:02:10.020 And then what do I do?

00:02:10.680 I start coasting.

00:02:11.500 A prime example would be in my marriage.

00:02:13.500 You're probably like this too.

00:02:14.460 We date our girlfriends.

00:02:15.560 We try to impress her.

00:02:16.540 We buy her nice things.

00:02:17.360 We take her to fancy restaurants and then we get the girl, right? 0.72

00:02:20.140 And what do we do?

00:02:20.780 We coast.

00:02:21.460 We stop courting her.

00:02:22.800 We stop going on dates.

00:02:23.900 We stop the flirtations.

00:02:25.000 And then before you know it, your wife says, the passion's gone.

00:02:28.540 Of course it is.

00:02:29.440 You forgot to keep bringing that passion to the relationship, right?

00:02:32.960 I speak from experience on this, but this shows up at work too, right?

00:02:36.900 You land your dream job or you get the killer client.

00:02:40.180 And essentially you begin to think that you can take the rest of the year off.

00:02:43.660 So what do you do?

00:02:44.420 You stop making sales calls.

00:02:45.580 You stop making appointments.

00:02:47.360 You stop following up with your clients.

00:02:48.900 And before long, you realize that your bank account is about to hit zero.

00:02:51.920 So what do you do in that case?

00:02:53.120 You immediately pick up the phone and you start dialing prospects, right?

00:02:56.600 You know exactly what I'm talking about.

00:02:58.600 You've done it.

00:02:59.080 I've done it.

00:02:59.480 We've all done it.

00:03:00.140 This is human nature.

00:03:01.060 But guys, in case you haven't heard me talk about this and say this, this is the idea

00:03:05.000 and the concept of what I call the natural man.

00:03:07.360 The natural man will get you killed.

00:03:09.720 Literally and figuratively, the natural man, he's lazy.

00:03:12.560 He's the immediate gratification.

00:03:13.880 He wants everything right now and he doesn't want to work for it.

00:03:17.560 And when things are good, he slacks off.

00:03:20.500 Now, for those of you who don't know, I spent some time in the military.

00:03:22.980 I actually spent 2005 and much of 2006 in Iraq.

00:03:26.680 And during that time, I had the chance every single day to look at a sign on our base that

00:03:31.640 read complacency kills as in literal death.

00:03:35.700 Soldiers would leave our operating base for a mission.

00:03:37.460 And because they had done that route so many times before or nothing ever happened when

00:03:41.480 they left, they would let their guard down and unexpectedly and without being ready,

00:03:45.560 they'd get ambushed or they'd get hit with an IED.

00:03:48.240 Now, I'm not suggesting that vigilance is always going to keep you out of harm's way

00:03:52.180 every time in your life, but it certainly will mitigate the risk of getting caught with

00:03:56.520 your pants down.

00:03:57.980 We cannot let this happen, guys.

00:03:59.680 Frankly, the world needs us more than it ever has.

00:04:01.940 There's enemies lurking.

00:04:03.320 There's going to be those that would prey upon the wheat.

00:04:05.140 There's wolves in our midst and less obvious, but equally as dangerous.

00:04:10.140 You might be the one to get in your own way.

00:04:12.380 I don't want any of us to slack off.

00:04:13.980 I don't want any of us to ever take it easy or even take the easy route because as soon

00:04:18.020 as we do, the enemy will meet us there and destroy us.

00:04:20.820 And I'm not talking about a physical enemy, although it could be that I'm talking about

00:04:25.060 getting fired or demoted because you forgot to keep getting the job done.

00:04:28.560 I'm talking about your wife blindsiding you with divorce papers because you forgot to 0.99

00:04:33.200 continue dating her.

00:04:34.160 I'm talking about a medical diagnosis that could have been prevented through a simple

00:04:39.840 diet and exercise program.

00:04:41.480 I'm talking about depression or even a loss of purpose and clarity in your life because

00:04:46.900 you got too busy to be deliberate about taking time for yourself.

00:04:51.320 None of these things will literally kill you, but they do have the potential to destroy you.

00:04:55.480 I talk with men dealing with each of these situations on a daily basis, and I can tell

00:04:59.720 you that all of them, every single one of them wish they would have done a little bit

00:05:04.000 more, push themselves just a little bit harder.

00:05:06.180 This is critical.

00:05:06.800 You guys, my, uh, my wife's grandfather, he grew amazing tomatoes.

00:05:11.740 Bear with me on this story.

00:05:12.860 Cause I do have a point to this each year.

00:05:14.920 He would take a shovel and he would literally chop a quarter of the roots off of each plant.

00:05:20.180 And he said that putting those tomatoes under a little bit of stress, help the fruit grow

00:05:24.180 better.

00:05:24.700 If the tomato plant believed that it was in trouble, it would work harder to stay alive.

00:05:28.240 Now.

00:05:28.420 I don't know if that's true.

00:05:29.460 I'm not a botanist, but I can tell you that every time I've been under stress, I have

00:05:34.120 performed better.

00:05:34.740 Now I don't want to suggest to you that you necessarily need to put undue amounts of stress

00:05:38.400 on yourself for the sake of growing, because I also believe that if you chop off all the

00:05:43.140 roots of that same tomato plant, it's probably going to die, but a healthy dose of pressure

00:05:47.520 of hardship, of stress challenge, all of that's going to test you.

00:05:50.940 It will push you beyond your perceived limitations and it will keep you from growing complacent.

00:05:55.920 Now I did a podcast earlier this week with the founder of on it, Aubrey Marcus on Tuesday.

00:06:00.600 And one of the things that he said to me, which I'll remember forever was pressure

00:06:04.020 makes the diamonds, dragons make the heroes and demons make the angels.

00:06:08.360 So with that said, here are your marching orders for the week, guys.

00:06:10.740 Here's what I want you to do.

00:06:11.720 I want you to get out a piece of paper right now.

00:06:13.720 Now, if you're driving or working out, I'm going to give you a little leniency on this

00:06:17.000 and allow you to do it later.

00:06:18.180 But I want you to divide that paper into four sections and I want you to title those four

00:06:22.500 sections, relationships, health, wealth, and self.

00:06:26.860 Now on a scale from one to 10, 10 being the highest, how much are you pushing yourself

00:06:31.780 in each one of these areas?

00:06:33.780 How hard are you working?

00:06:34.700 How much pressure have you exposed yourself to?

00:06:36.540 If you're not ranking at at least a seven, you do not have enough pressure in your life.

00:06:41.080 So the next thing I need you to do is to write down three things, three tasks that you're

00:06:45.100 going to complete in each one of those areas.

00:06:46.960 That's going to put a little bit more stress on you than you currently have.

00:06:50.340 And I want you to get those tasks done in the next week.

00:06:53.100 So before our next Friday field notes, I want you to have these tasks done in relationships.

00:06:56.900 It could be going on a date with your wife.

00:06:58.920 It could be spending undivided attention with each of your children.

00:07:01.540 It might be even helping a friend move.

00:07:03.200 And with your health, it could be going to the gym for the first time in years.

00:07:06.540 It might mean that you sign up for that Spartan race that you've been meaning to sign up for

00:07:10.000 with your wealth.

00:07:11.020 It could mean that you finished that product that you've been meaning to finish.

00:07:14.180 Maybe you asked someone to buy something from you.

00:07:16.920 And of course, with yourself, we don't want to leave ourselves out.

00:07:19.320 Maybe it's carving time out for reading a book every single day.

00:07:23.140 You could pick up a hobby that you haven't been able to do in years, or it could mean

00:07:27.600 that maybe you go camping with your buddies.

00:07:29.860 But the bottom line is this.

00:07:31.420 You have to push yourself.

00:07:33.240 Don't ever let yourself get comfortable.

00:07:35.180 There's no coasting.

00:07:36.120 There's no middle ground, no default mode.

00:07:38.120 You are either pushing to new heights or you are falling behind.

00:07:41.060 So on that note, guys, if you do want to surround yourself with 170 men who are going to ensure

00:07:47.520 that you continue pushing yourself, I just want to invite you to join our mastermind group,

00:07:52.400 The Iron Council.

00:07:53.240 Each and every one of the men inside the council are pushing.

00:07:55.380 They're stepping outside of their comfort zone.

00:07:57.240 They're doing new things.

00:07:58.220 They're becoming better men.

00:07:59.140 So if you're interested, you can join us at orderofman.com slash ironcouncil.

00:08:03.080 But guys, in the meantime, you have your marching orders.

00:08:05.880 Complacency kills.

00:08:06.720 I don't want you to be ordinary.

00:08:08.100 Do not allow yourself to get comfortable.

00:08:09.940 And until next week, guys, take action and live manfully.

00:08:14.260 Those are your Friday Field Notes.

00:08:16.120 Now it's time to crush your excuses, own your choices, accept responsibility, and live manfully.

00:08:22.800 Learn how at orderofman.com forward slash field notes.

Order of Man - November 04, 2016

FFN 028： Complacency Kills

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript