Order of Man - December 16, 2016


FFN 034： A Primer on Stoicism

Topics
stoicism perception and action focus on what actually is
Hosted by
Ryan Michler
Mentioned
Ryan Holiday Stephen Hanselman Tim Ferriss Seneca
091： Why Men Fight ｜ Jonathan Gottschall 092： 50 Ironmans in 50 States in 50 Days ｜ James Lawrence

Episode Stats


Length

10 minutes

Words per minute

209.29

Word count

2,111

Sentence count

143


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, Ryan talks about the concept and philosophy of Stoicism, and how it has changed his life and the way he thinks about life. He also discusses the benefits of being a man of action, and why you should live life to the fullest.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.
00:00:06.020 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.
00:00:10.480 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong.
00:00:15.500 This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become.
00:00:19.760 At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.
00:00:25.360 And what is going on today? My name is Ryan Michler and I am the host and the founder of Order of Man.
00:00:29.620 Guys, if you are listening to this show today, it is because you want to become a better man.
00:00:34.380 And that is what we're all about here.
00:00:36.220 We interview the world's most successful entrepreneurs, athletes, warriors, authors, scholars, etc.
00:00:41.600 What we do is we extract their wisdom and then we bring it to you each and every week.
00:00:45.840 We have two shows though, just in case you don't know, each week are Tuesday show where we interview the top performers I just mentioned to you.
00:00:52.080 And this show, our Friday Field Notes, where you guys get to listen to my thoughts, my ideas, my inspirations, my ramblings from throughout the week.
00:00:59.360 So make sure you subscribe if you haven't already.
00:01:01.340 I do have some exciting news about this, by the way.
00:01:04.580 And that is that we have reached the number 29 position in all of iTunes for the business category.
00:01:10.160 Yes, number 29.
00:01:11.900 That is a huge accomplishment and one that I want to make sure that I thank you for as, guys, we couldn't have done it and climbed the charts like we have if it weren't for you.
00:01:21.020 So I want to encourage you to invite some of your boys to listen in, your dad, your brothers, your friends, your co-workers, your neighbors, basically any man that you know that needs to hear the message of the order.
00:01:31.020 Now, I want to get right into the meat of the show today.
00:01:33.560 I don't have a lot of time on these Friday Field Notes, so I just jump right into it.
00:01:37.140 I want to talk with you today about a concept and a way of thinking that, guys, has literally changed the course of my life.
00:01:44.020 In fact, this is more than just a way of thinking.
00:01:46.520 This is a way of life for me, and it will continue to be so.
00:01:49.860 Tim Ferriss actually refers to the philosophy that I'm going to share with you today as his, quote, personal operating system.
00:01:55.920 So my wife and I, we were out on a date the other night, and we were talking about how we've not only grown in our relationships, but how we've each grown individually.
00:02:04.540 And during the conversation, and among other things, she told me that I am a lot more patient than I used to be and definitely more level-headed.
00:02:11.660 And at first, I wrote this off to the fact that I'm just getting older.
00:02:14.900 And as a result, because I'm getting older, I've become more mature.
00:02:17.920 And I believe there's validity to that.
00:02:19.740 I believe that we do get mature as we get older.
00:02:21.800 But after I've thought about this more, I really do think that there's more to it than just maturity and getting older.
00:02:27.640 And what I want to share with you today is the concept and philosophy of stoicism.
00:02:31.180 This is something, guys, like I said, that I have really latched onto as a way of thinking about my life.
00:02:35.840 But more importantly, this is the way that I live it, and this is the way that I will continue to live it moving forward.
00:02:40.200 And I think that you agree, most men, including you and me, would not consider ourselves to be philosophers.
00:02:47.000 Studying philosophy is probably the last thing you'd ever catch me studying when I was younger.
00:02:51.300 But the more I delve into this world of stoicism, the more I understand that I have completely misunderstood what that word philosophy even is and what it even means.
00:03:00.820 I used to believe that philosophy was about studying theories and questions about why we're here, what we're meant to accomplish, how to live, all of that stuff.
00:03:08.500 But I also believe there was a huge disconnect between those who merely thought about this kind of stuff and then those who actually applied it in their lives.
00:03:17.500 So I pride myself, and I've talked about this before, of being a man of action.
00:03:22.120 And so for me, philosophy just didn't sit well, especially with my misunderstanding of what it actually was.
00:03:27.300 But what I'm understanding now is that philosophy and stoicism in particular is about the way we think and the way that we apply.
00:03:37.020 So if any of you have heard the serenity prayer, you'll get a good understanding of what stoicism is all about.
00:03:42.040 It goes, God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
00:03:49.300 And this, in my opinion, is the basis.
00:03:51.840 It's the framework for stoicism.
00:03:53.380 There's a lot of misconception about the way stoics think and behave.
00:03:55.840 I think most people believe that stoicism is about controlling, or maybe not controlling, but eliminating your emotions.
00:04:03.080 I used to believe that same thing.
00:04:05.140 But what I know now is that stoicism is not about eliminating your emotions.
00:04:09.000 It's about understanding them.
00:04:10.760 And then more importantly, using your emotions to your benefit and the benefit of those that you have an obligation and a responsibility for.
00:04:17.980 The basis for stoicism is threefold.
00:04:21.100 It's perception, it's action, and it's will.
00:04:24.600 And that's what I wanted to talk with you about today.
00:04:26.960 So let's break down each one of these, and then I'll give you a couple of resources where you can learn more before we sign off for the day.
00:04:32.400 So the first thing I want to do is talk about perception.
00:04:35.100 I used to get consumed.
00:04:37.300 Consumed.
00:04:37.700 And I'm sure you've done this as well with should-haves and could-haves and would-haves.
00:04:41.260 But what I've come to realize is that life is not about necessarily what's happened in the past or necessarily what will happen in the future.
00:04:47.880 It's about what's happening right now.
00:04:50.440 It's not about the way I think and why.
00:04:53.420 It's about what actually is.
00:04:55.620 So perception is about dealing in reality.
00:04:58.740 Most of us, frankly, don't.
00:05:00.300 We get so consumed with what happened in the past.
00:05:02.360 The way someone treated us or the results of some endeavor.
00:05:04.920 However, this isn't necessarily a bad thing, but when it keeps you and me from moving forward, when it keeps us from learning a lesson and then applying that in the future, it becomes a hindrance.
00:05:13.480 We all know a friend, and you guys are going to know exactly who I'm talking about here, who is stuck in his glory days.
00:05:18.680 He's stuck in his past.
00:05:20.040 It could be high school or college sports, but he's failed to do anything great with his life moving forward.
00:05:24.860 And so there's one question that you should learn to ask yourself over and over again when it comes to the way that you see the world, and that is what is happening right now?
00:05:34.920 Not what should be happening or could be happening, but what is actually happening.
00:05:40.480 Now, the reason that this question is so important, because what is actually happening drives us to take action.
00:05:46.720 And not only action, but the right action.
00:05:48.900 If we're too focused on what could have been or what might have been, we'll get stuck in a never-ending cycle of contemplation.
00:05:56.580 And we'll continue to relive those past memories or potentially worse, dream of what the future might hold without a willingness to do anything about it.
00:06:04.000 So I want you, again, to ask yourself what actually happened, because this gives you the framework for making the correct decisions moving forward.
00:06:11.360 And as difficult as I know that it is to ask yourself what actually happened, especially if you come to the conclusion that something may have been your fault.
00:06:20.580 But this is exactly what you need to make powerful decisions moving forward.
00:06:24.560 Decisions that are going to propel your life in the right direction moving forward.
00:06:28.860 And this was the disconnect that I had with philosophy until recently.
00:06:31.940 Philosophy is all about the practice of understanding truth for the sole purpose.
00:06:37.640 This is critical.
00:06:38.380 For the sole purpose of taking massive action designed to improve your life and, again, those that you care about.
00:06:45.900 So the question you should be asking yourself when it comes to action is this.
00:06:49.560 Armed with a clear idea of what is actually happening, what is the best course of action moving forward?
00:06:57.180 So those are the first two domains, perception and action.
00:07:00.220 The third domain of stoicism is will.
00:07:03.800 And when I say will, I'm not talking about the will to go on in the face of adversity or something like that.
00:07:09.420 I'm talking about a willingness to come to the terms with and even accept the things that are beyond our control.
00:07:16.700 Maybe you had a rough upbringing.
00:07:18.000 Maybe a client or a business partner took advantage of you or took your money or your business.
00:07:24.380 Maybe a natural disaster ruined your home or your business.
00:07:27.000 But here's the reality.
00:07:28.340 There is nothing that you can do about some of those things.
00:07:31.320 So focusing on those types of things does not allow you to improve your life.
00:07:35.300 In fact, it makes it worse because you'll become so consumed.
00:07:39.040 And I know people like this and you know people like this that are so consumed with the things that cannot change.
00:07:45.640 And what it does is it leads to a life of frustration and contention and bitterness.
00:07:50.840 So instead of focusing on the things that we cannot control, choose instead to focus on the things that we can.
00:07:58.040 Like how we respond to these unfortunate events or anything that might happen in our lives.
00:08:02.940 So guys, this is not meant to be a detailed description of what stoicism is all about.
00:08:06.880 It's just meant to give you an overview, a primer.
00:08:08.900 So if you want to, you can delve into this a little bit more in depth.
00:08:11.720 But remember, the core principles of stoicism are perception, action, and will.
00:08:16.740 So if you want to learn more about stoicism and how it will help you as a man, you can check out some writings.
00:08:23.020 I personally go to Marcus Aurelius, Seneca, and you could also go to Epictetus.
00:08:29.260 And these are three major figures of stoicism.
00:08:32.400 Meditations by Marcus Aurelius is a great resource.
00:08:34.840 I try to read that every year.
00:08:36.420 You might also want to check out a little bit more modern.
00:08:38.860 Ego is the enemy and the obstacle is the way.
00:08:41.320 And both of those are by Ryan Holiday, who I've had on my show before.
00:08:44.280 And you can check that one out at orderofman.com slash 065.
00:08:48.600 We talk about ego is the enemy on that podcast.
00:08:50.600 And then there's a new book I just started reading called The Daily Stoic.
00:08:53.680 That one, again, is by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman.
00:08:56.680 So outside of that, guys, study stoicism.
00:08:59.060 Again, focus on what actually is.
00:09:01.120 Take action moving forward and only work on what you can control.
00:09:06.520 So if you want to learn more about how to apply the concepts that we're talking about here,
00:09:10.640 stoicism and everything else in our Friday Field Notes,
00:09:12.660 I encourage you guys to join us in our elite mastermind, the Iron Council.
00:09:16.560 This is a collection of men taking the knowledge that we share and all the tools and all the
00:09:20.240 resources, and then they're actually applying those things that they're learning into their
00:09:23.840 lives for massive results.
00:09:25.520 Results in their families, their businesses, their communities, their level of wealth,
00:09:29.120 their health, satisfaction, every other area of life.
00:09:32.240 So if you want to know more about how to join us, head to orderofman.com slash Iron Council.
00:09:35.960 And I hope to see you inside there.
00:09:37.080 So until next week, men, ask yourself again what really is and what you can't and can
00:09:42.540 actually do about it.
00:09:44.080 But above all, live manfully.
00:09:46.660 Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast.
00:09:49.600 You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be.
00:09:53.640 We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.
00:09:56.760 We'll be right back.
00:10:04.340 Thank you.