Order of Man - December 30, 2016


FFN 036: Stay the Course


Episode Stats

Length

10 minutes

Words per Minute

201.45123

Word Count

2,184

Sentence Count

139

Hate Speech Sentences

1


Summary

In this episode, Ryan talks about the importance of staying the course and how to maintain your goals in the new year. He also shares 6 ways that you can maintain consistency in your goals and objectives in order to achieve them.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.
00:00:06.020 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.
00:00:10.480 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong.
00:00:15.500 This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become.
00:00:19.760 At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.
00:00:25.120 Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Michler and I am the host and the founder of Order of Men.
00:00:29.300 Now, this is our Friday Field Note show, which is basically 10 minutes of my thoughts and my ramblings, ideas, inspirations from throughout the week.
00:00:36.800 Now, if you've been around for a while with Order of Men, you already know that.
00:00:39.700 But if not, I want you to know also that we have an interview show, and that's released each and every Tuesday.
00:00:44.580 And we bring on some of the world's most successful men.
00:00:47.320 New York Times bestselling authors, elite athletes, spec ops operators, entrepreneurs, basically anybody who's going to help you and me become better men.
00:00:55.500 So make sure you subscribe to the show. Just subscribe. You'll never miss a single episode.
00:00:58.740 All of those are designed to help you be a better father, a better husband, a better leader, basically a better man.
00:01:04.960 And I want to give you a quick heads up for those of you who are looking for more out of life.
00:01:08.700 I know there's a lot of men out there who like to talk, and there's very few or relatively few who like to do.
00:01:14.360 But we have an elite mastermind available for the doers of the world.
00:01:17.560 And this month, our focus is on working on what we call our 12-week battle plan, and specifically, how to manage our time better.
00:01:25.020 So if you want to know more about what that's all about, head to orderaman.com slash ironcouncil, and you can get all the details there.
00:01:30.840 Now, let me get into the topic of conversation for today, which is staying the course.
00:01:35.020 Everywhere you turn this time of year, as of this recording, it's close to January now,
00:01:39.980 you're going to see somebody telling you how to set New Year's resolutions.
00:01:43.020 And while I definitely think there's validity, there is validity to setting up New Year's resolutions correctly,
00:01:47.820 but there just doesn't seem to be a whole lot of new information on it.
00:01:50.680 Everybody knows how to set goals.
00:01:52.660 Everybody's heard of SMART goals, specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, time-sensitive, or some variation.
00:01:59.440 But is setting goals really the problem?
00:02:01.560 Like, do you really have a hard time dreaming?
00:02:03.920 Do you really have a hard time envisioning what you want your future to look like?
00:02:07.800 Do you really have a hard time thinking about what you would like to do over the next 12 months?
00:02:12.100 I would argue that most people don't have a problem with this.
00:02:14.760 In fact, I don't think most people even have a problem with getting started.
00:02:18.740 Most people can get easily fired up about something for a week or two weeks or even a month.
00:02:24.580 Think about how many diets everybody's always started.
00:02:28.040 Think about how many times you've stepped foot into the gym for the very first time.
00:02:31.660 Or how many times have you actually written a budget?
00:02:34.520 This is simple stuff, right?
00:02:35.600 What I think most people have a hard time with, with regards to their goals, is maintaining them over a sustained period of time.
00:02:43.700 I go to a local CrossFit gym and I know without a doubt that it's going to be packed for the first 30 days of the year.
00:02:50.920 Why?
00:02:51.360 It's because nothing has changed in most people's minds from December 31st to January 1st.
00:02:58.640 I know they're a little hopped up on motivation and ambition because society told them that's what you do on January 1st.
00:03:03.860 But most of that motivation is external.
00:03:06.540 It's not a deeply rooted belief in the changes that they actually want to make in their lives.
00:03:11.580 So this leads me to the conversation I want to have with you today.
00:03:14.760 How do we maintain our objectives?
00:03:17.000 How do we keep going when we lose external motivation?
00:03:19.860 How do we sustain this new way of living when the excitement has worn off?
00:03:24.460 So what I'm going to do today is I'm going to give you six ways that you can maintain consistency.
00:03:29.260 That's what we're going here for is consistency in your objectives for the year.
00:03:33.980 And I don't care if that's losing weight or connecting with your wife or getting a job promotion.
00:03:38.380 Maybe it's making more money, starting a new business, any number of things that you might have in store for yourself for 2017.
00:03:44.200 And the first step in staying the course with regards to your goals is to start from the right mindset in the first place.
00:03:52.000 It all starts with the mind.
00:03:53.500 I was noticing the other day as I was on Instagram that one of my buddies had posted a picture of him on a private jet with his family going on vacation.
00:04:02.300 And my initial response was, I want to do that.
00:04:04.980 That looks fun.
00:04:05.560 Why can't I have what he has?
00:04:07.340 And then I realized and remembered, I don't even really like flying on planes all that much.
00:04:11.520 So it's really easy to look around and see what other people have and want it for no other reason than it just looks cool and we want to have it.
00:04:20.220 But if you want to maintain your objectives, you better have a damn good reason for it.
00:04:25.240 Things are going to get hard.
00:04:26.920 The change that you're trying to make in your life is not going to be easy.
00:04:30.600 You're going to want to give up.
00:04:32.020 And unless you have a solid, emotionally charged reason for making that change in the first place, it just won't last.
00:04:39.000 Now, next, guys, you need to plant your flag.
00:04:40.860 Look, if you're trying to lose weight for a cruise or woo your wife so she doesn't divorce you or hurry and get that job promotion, then coast the rest of your career or even get your financial affairs in order so you don't go bankrupt.
00:04:52.220 You have not fully committed to the amount of effort it is going to take to reach your objectives.
00:04:59.220 If you want to make real change in your life, you've got to understand that you are in this for the long haul.
00:05:06.180 You've got to make the decision that you're changing your lifestyle, not just a couple activities temporarily or for the next month or 30 days or however long it may be.
00:05:14.920 Having a lifelong approach, guys, is going to keep you grounded in reality when you're tempted to stray or if you do stray to actually get you back on the path quickly.
00:05:24.300 And this leads me to the next point, which is that you have to redefine success.
00:05:29.120 Most people, when it comes to fitness, for example, I'll throw that one out there, would define success as reaching a specific goal, like 20 pounds of weight loss, for example.
00:05:38.420 But rather than focusing on the end result, I want you to consider focusing on what I call the tactics.
00:05:44.920 These are the small little actions that you can do day in and day out that will help you reach that objective.
00:05:51.660 This way, losing 20 pounds is not the benchmark for success.
00:05:55.600 It's the actions that you can complete that will ensure you lose the weight.
00:06:01.620 In this case, it'd be, for example, going to the gym five days per week.
00:06:05.400 It might be cutting out sugar or not eating after seven o'clock in the evening or drinking more water.
00:06:11.200 These are all controllable steps.
00:06:13.440 And if you do them and you complete them, then that 20 pounds you're trying to lose just won't be a problem.
00:06:19.580 It's going to take care of itself.
00:06:20.760 Now, next, let's talk about this buzzword motivation.
00:06:23.920 We hear it everywhere.
00:06:25.340 Everybody talks about being more motivated.
00:06:27.680 Everybody talks about finding more motivation.
00:06:30.100 Motivation, guys, is overrated.
00:06:32.360 You either want the thing or you don't, period.
00:06:35.540 How bad do you want it?
00:06:36.620 If you're going to get derailed at the slightest sign of struggle, you just don't want it bad enough.
00:06:42.760 Or if you get off track indefinitely after missing one step towards your goal, you never really wanted it bad enough in the first place.
00:06:49.700 So now that we know that we can just forget about motivation, I want you to instead focus on systems, systems and processes that you can use and you can implement that will ensure you're completing your tactics, which will ensure you're meeting your objectives.
00:07:05.400 So, for example, I'm going to come back to losing weight and going to the gym.
00:07:08.820 If that's always been a struggle for you, consider buying a system of workouts that you can follow so you don't have to think about what you're going to do.
00:07:16.120 You can just follow and tap into the system.
00:07:18.660 If dating your wife each week has become a problem because you're so busy, then use the system of a calendar and write it into your calendar each week.
00:07:25.940 No thinking, no motivation required, just executing the system.
00:07:29.860 If you're spending more money than you earn because you put everything on a credit card and that's a problem for you,
00:07:34.500 then move to a cash-only system.
00:07:36.800 Guys, the natural man, and I talk about this all the time, the natural man is weak and in difficult times, he is going to fail you.
00:07:42.420 So creating systems and processes that move you towards your goal and away from the temptations that would keep you from your objectives is critical.
00:07:52.520 And this leads me into point number five, which is that you have to have a system again, but this time specifically to track your progress.
00:08:00.920 Most of us live in delusion.
00:08:02.820 I've talked about this before.
00:08:04.000 Most of us think that we're more effective than we really are.
00:08:07.200 Most of us think more highly of ourselves than we probably ought to.
00:08:10.920 And so creating and implementing a tracking tool is going to allow you to deal in reality.
00:08:15.640 Okay, so if it's working out, a scale is going to work for you.
00:08:18.920 If it's money and budgeting, a financial program that tracks your expenses is going to work.
00:08:23.460 If it's connecting with your wife, again, a calendar is going to work.
00:08:25.960 This is one of the hardest things to do because it takes time and attention.
00:08:28.820 But if you really want to improve, you have to know where things stand and you have to develop the habits to find out where things stand.
00:08:37.340 If you don't, I promise you, and I've done this before, you are going to fool yourself into thinking that you're doing better than you really are.
00:08:44.520 And the last point that I want to make with you today is that you have to find a team.
00:08:48.580 You have to find an accountability partner.
00:08:50.240 It could be a spouse.
00:08:51.140 It could be a friend.
00:08:51.860 It could be a colleague.
00:08:52.800 But the bottom line is that you have to find somebody who's willing to help you toe the line.
00:08:57.020 If they're not willing to get tough with you, you might have identified a good friend, but not necessarily a great accountability partner.
00:09:03.620 So find somebody who you can give permission to get after you a bit if you fall short.
00:09:09.120 And if you can't find someone like that or you want something a little bit more structured, again, consider joining us inside the Iron Council.
00:09:15.180 Like I mentioned earlier, we are focusing heavily on the 12-week battle plan, which is going to help you identify your objectives, the tactics for getting you there,
00:09:22.920 the ability to, again, track your progress, and the accountability to keep you on pace.
00:09:28.600 So you can learn more and join us at orderman.com slash ironcouncil.
00:09:32.220 So guys, there you have it.
00:09:33.740 Six steps to help you stay the course in 2017.
00:09:37.640 No more smart goals.
00:09:38.660 I want to help you maintain those things.
00:09:40.500 So I'll recap really quickly.
00:09:42.400 Emotionally driven objectives.
00:09:44.800 Number two, commit forever.
00:09:46.980 Number three, redefine success to the tactics rather than the objective.
00:09:50.500 Number four is to throw out motivation and instead focus on systems and processes.
00:09:56.200 Number five, track your progress.
00:09:58.220 And number six, find a team.
00:09:59.720 So utilize those six steps.
00:10:01.280 And I'm sure that you're going to be able to make 2017 your best year ever.
00:10:04.620 Until next week, men, stay the course and become the man you were meant to be.
00:10:08.680 Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast.
00:10:11.580 You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be.
00:10:15.620 We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.
00:10:20.500 We'll see you next week.