Order of Man - September 15, 2017


FFN 073： The Power of a Coach


Episode Stats

Length

13 minutes

Words per Minute

209.06827

Word Count

2,742

Sentence Count

178


Summary

In this episode, Ryan talks about the importance of a business coach and why you should hire one. He shares the story of how he hired his first business coach, and how it changed his life in a big way.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.
00:00:06.020 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.
00:00:10.440 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong.
00:00:15.500 This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become.
00:00:19.760 At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.
00:00:24.720 Men, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Mickler, and I am the host and founder of this podcast, The Order of Man.
00:00:31.060 Whether you are new to the show or a longtime listener, if you're a man, you are in the right place.
00:00:36.240 This is a show about being a better one, a better father to your children, a better husband to your wife, a better boss to your employees, a better leader in your community, and generally the man you are meant to be.
00:00:47.040 We have two shows each and every week, guys. You are listening to the second show, Friday Field Notes, where I share some ideas and inspiration I've had from going at it throughout the week.
00:00:57.400 This one is a great one, as it's a topic that was suggested by a member of our exclusive brotherhood, The Iron Council, J.D. Shipley.
00:01:04.040 I'm going to get into that in a minute.
00:01:05.720 But we also have an interview show where I interview the world's most successful men on the planet.
00:01:10.700 I ask them some powerful questions, I extract their powerful answers, and then we package it up in a conversation filled with tactics and strategies that you can actually use.
00:01:20.000 I've listened to some of these shows that last an hour and a half to two hours, and although I can appreciate having a gentlemanly conversation, I want to get to the heart of the matter as quickly as possible.
00:01:31.100 So these shows are jam-packed at about 35 to 40 minutes.
00:01:35.280 Now, before I get into the meat of the show today, I do want to ask you a very quick favor.
00:01:40.540 I don't ask for this a whole lot.
00:01:42.080 If you would, please leave us an iTunes rating and review.
00:01:45.760 We have about 500 of them now.
00:01:47.680 And also, share this podcast with one, just one, other man that you think would gain value by listening to the show each and every week.
00:01:54.480 Both of these favors go a long way in growing this show and increasing our reach, which will, in turn, allow us to connect with even higher caliber guests and deliver more value to you.
00:02:04.920 That's what we're trying to accomplish.
00:02:06.160 Now, today, since I do like to get right into it, I want to talk with you about the power of a coach.
00:02:11.380 I think it's safe to assume by now that you probably, at least to some degree, understand that having a coach is a valuable strategy towards becoming great, whether that's improving your golf swing or enhancing your public speaking skills or building a relationship with your wife or growing a business, whatever it may be.
00:02:28.720 But it amazes me how often men recognize the value of coaching in elite performers, yet they underestimate the power of having a coach, even if they're not at that elite level or competing on the global stage.
00:02:41.540 Which, I get it, for a long time, I actually resisted having a coach.
00:02:45.940 I thought that I could figure it all out on my own.
00:02:48.200 I thought having a coach was a waste of money.
00:02:51.120 I thought coaching would be pointless or that all coaches were scam artists.
00:02:55.880 And so, I resisted for a long time.
00:02:57.900 But it wasn't until I came to a breaking point in my business.
00:03:02.140 I almost threw in the towel about five years ago in my financial planning practice.
00:03:06.140 And I realized that if I was going to make it work, that I needed some help.
00:03:10.420 And I was probably going to have to pay for it.
00:03:12.480 And that's when I hired my very first business coach.
00:03:15.380 I had to pay for my flight to meet with him.
00:03:17.460 I had to pay for my hotel room.
00:03:19.260 I had to pay for food.
00:03:20.260 I had to pay a non-refundable $1,500 deposit just to meet with him.
00:03:24.600 And mind you, the business practice wasn't going very well at the time.
00:03:28.700 And yet, I continue to make that sacrifice.
00:03:30.480 But the long story short, and I'll break this down throughout the rest of the conversation,
00:03:34.560 I actually ended up hiring him and paying him an extra $6,000 for him to coach me.
00:03:39.820 And I'll be honest, I had buyer's remorse right away.
00:03:43.060 I thought I had made a huge mistake, but I already paid the money.
00:03:46.440 So, I committed to doing exactly, exactly what he told me.
00:03:50.680 And within a year, I had doubled and was on the way to tripling my revenue that same year.
00:03:55.380 So, today, what I thought I would cover with the help and suggestion from JD,
00:04:00.480 again, is a couple of key reasons why hiring a coach might just be the next step in the evolution
00:04:07.660 of the man that you are all working to become.
00:04:10.940 The first reason I want to share with you, and these aren't necessarily in any order,
00:04:14.540 is that you should consider hiring a coach because that coach is not emotionally tied
00:04:19.620 to your behaviors and or your results.
00:04:23.820 Emotions are a great tool in certain circumstances.
00:04:27.620 When I fell in love with my wife, for example, it was an emotional decision.
00:04:31.020 It wasn't a logical one.
00:04:32.300 I can't quantify why we fell in love.
00:04:34.680 There's no T-chart that weighs out the pros and cons.
00:04:37.200 It was strictly emotional.
00:04:39.060 But when it comes to the results you're trying to produce in your life,
00:04:42.360 and what I was trying to produce in my life, emotions have a way of clouding judgment.
00:04:47.380 One example I can think of, and this is my background with a financial planning practice,
00:04:50.920 is investing in the stock market.
00:04:52.520 Everybody knows the first rule of investing, which is to buy low, sell high.
00:04:57.200 But nobody does it.
00:04:59.020 They think they will, but when push comes to shove, they allow their fear and their greed,
00:05:03.620 by the way, those are both emotions, to get in the way of making a prudent financial decision.
00:05:09.260 And a coach is not emotionally tied to your decision, so he or she can make a recommendation
00:05:13.720 to you without attaching themselves to the baggage that you have.
00:05:18.200 Now, when people hear that, they get upset.
00:05:19.720 I'm not saying that as a negative connotation, I'm just saying you bring your own experiences
00:05:23.980 and beliefs and cultures and ideas to the table, and sometimes that creates a problem.
00:05:30.000 We make excuses, we get scared, we have history.
00:05:33.500 All of that changes the dynamic when you're trying to make choices about your life.
00:05:38.020 Now, the second reason is that a coach can see things that you cannot see.
00:05:43.300 You are in the forest.
00:05:44.640 I am in the forest.
00:05:45.680 I'm doing the work.
00:05:46.620 I've got my head down.
00:05:47.840 I'm plowing through this forest.
00:05:49.020 But a coach is above the trees.
00:05:51.240 You and I were making decisions with limited knowledge, and a coach can see everything
00:05:55.880 all at once.
00:05:57.060 So when you're about to make a misguided decision with the limited information that you have
00:06:02.580 because, again, you're in the trees or you're about to do something dumb, a coach can say
00:06:07.500 stop, and then he can get you pointed in the right direction.
00:06:10.140 I can't even begin to tell you all the times I've wanted to make decisions in my business,
00:06:14.360 for example, only to have a coach share some inside knowledge that I wasn't aware of that
00:06:19.020 made me question the move I was about to make.
00:06:20.960 Now, the third point and the third reason you should consider hiring a coach is that coaches
00:06:25.080 have compounding experience.
00:06:27.220 In a way, they're fortune tellers because they've seen the moves.
00:06:31.740 They know how this will play out in other people.
00:06:33.800 They've watched other people trip and fall, and they've watched other people succeed.
00:06:37.120 So they know.
00:06:38.360 They've projected themselves into the future.
00:06:40.180 Now they're coming back with that information to share it with you.
00:06:42.920 Now they can come back and tell you where to step and where not to.
00:06:46.780 It's been said that a smart man learns from his mistakes, but a wise man learns from the
00:06:51.960 mistake of others.
00:06:52.860 There's no rule that says that you have to learn that mistake for yourself.
00:06:56.520 The time and the energy and the resources, the money that a coach is going to save you
00:07:01.200 is infinitely valuable.
00:07:03.220 And the fourth reason that I want to share, and this is the final point I want to make
00:07:06.540 before I give you a couple of keys to be aware of, is that coaches cost money.
00:07:11.460 I know what a lot of you are probably thinking when I say that coaches cost money,
00:07:15.040 and you're probably thinking that the cost of a coach is not a benefit, but I disagree.
00:07:20.260 We all know that you only value things so much.
00:07:23.780 Anything that you and I have ever received for free, we have not valued as much.
00:07:27.760 Bottom line.
00:07:28.760 Also, you now have skin in the game, which is going to drive you to take action.
00:07:32.980 You don't want to lose your investment.
00:07:34.400 That's how it worked out for me when I told you earlier about hiring my business coach.
00:07:37.940 He was expensive.
00:07:38.680 So, if I didn't do what he said and what he told me to do, in a way, I was wasting the
00:07:44.240 investment.
00:07:44.700 I was wasting the money that I had given him.
00:07:47.300 If you don't spend any money and get nothing in return, how valuable was the coaching?
00:07:53.660 Not very valuable.
00:07:54.860 But on the other hand, if you spend $10,000, for example, and you produce $20,000 or $50,000
00:08:01.420 or $100,000 worth of revenue, how valuable was that?
00:08:05.300 Very valuable.
00:08:06.020 That first coach that I spent money on cost roughly $8,000 after all was said and done.
00:08:11.860 But I'm likely to spend around $25,000 on coaching this year.
00:08:16.780 Some of you might be thinking that's a ton of money.
00:08:18.680 Some of you might be thinking that's not a lot at all.
00:08:20.660 But either way, it's going to be a great investment because the revenue that that coaching will
00:08:25.780 produce is tenfold this year and it's worth millions over a lifetime.
00:08:31.660 So, you see the benefits.
00:08:32.720 I want to share with you before we wrap things up today, three simple things to look for in
00:08:37.020 a coach because I have a lot of guys that will say, I want to hire a coach.
00:08:40.460 I want to hire somebody who's going to help me get from point A to point B to point Z,
00:08:43.980 but I don't really know where to find this person.
00:08:46.420 I don't really know what to look for.
00:08:47.960 So, I want to share three simple tips, three simple things that you should look for.
00:08:52.380 First, I want you to find a coach that specializes.
00:08:55.260 There is no coach out there, no matter how great they are, that knows it all.
00:08:59.880 So, you need to figure out what results that you want to produce.
00:09:03.580 Notice I said you need to figure it out.
00:09:05.540 Not a coach, not somebody else, not your wife, not your friends, you.
00:09:09.040 You need to figure out what results you want to produce and then you can hire a coach to get
00:09:15.060 you those results.
00:09:16.720 Those results specifically and nothing else.
00:09:18.660 I have four to six coaches at any given time based on what I am trying to create in my life
00:09:24.520 in that moment and my coaches change all the time based on the needs and the desires and the
00:09:30.720 wishes and the objectives that I have.
00:09:32.720 Next, look for a coach who's going to ask you great questions.
00:09:36.140 The goal of a great coach is not to give you the answers.
00:09:39.500 Listen to that again.
00:09:40.300 The goal of a great coach is not to give you the answers.
00:09:43.860 I know that's a little counterintuitive, but the objective of a coach is to help you find
00:09:48.640 your own answers, to help you uncover your own power, to help you uncover your own truth
00:09:54.280 and your own reality.
00:09:55.920 So, if you find a coach who's telling you everything and giving you all the advice under
00:10:00.180 the sun and gives you every answer that you could possibly look for, I would be a little
00:10:05.200 skeptical because he's not really a coach.
00:10:07.740 You want to find someone who asks a lot of questions almost to the point of annoyance and
00:10:13.120 this is somebody who's more likely to help you come up with your own solutions, which
00:10:16.920 I promise you after doing this with tens of thousands of dollars and a lot of years that
00:10:22.700 the most powerful solutions that you can come up with are your own and a coach's job is to
00:10:27.300 help you get outside of your own way.
00:10:29.920 And a third metric, guys, that I wanted to share with you is that you need to look for
00:10:33.180 results.
00:10:34.100 There's a scripture that basically says, by their fruits, ye shall know thee.
00:10:38.800 You are looking for the fruits.
00:10:40.640 You're looking for the results.
00:10:42.160 It is so easy, especially in this digital age, to fool people into thinking that you
00:10:47.420 have it figured out.
00:10:48.580 But the results, the true results, they do not lie.
00:10:52.080 So, you want to find someone who has the results that you're after and or that they've produced
00:10:57.540 the results for others.
00:10:59.120 You want somebody with experience in producing results.
00:11:03.900 You do not want to be the guinea pig here.
00:11:06.120 That is going to be a recipe for disaster.
00:11:08.740 And guys, that's why coaching is so valuable.
00:11:10.520 Again, they're emotionally disconnected from your decisions.
00:11:13.520 They're going to help you see the blind spots.
00:11:15.540 They have that compounding experience.
00:11:17.180 I talked about being the fortune teller in a way, and they cost money, which will get
00:11:22.120 you to put some skin in the game.
00:11:24.160 And again, you're going to want to find someone who's a specialist, who asks great questions,
00:11:27.540 and who is already producing the results.
00:11:30.440 I know that hiring a coach can be a little nerve wracking, especially if you've never done
00:11:33.460 it before, but the value of coaching is immeasurable.
00:11:37.220 I don't know what results you're trying to produce.
00:11:38.940 But I will tell you that I personally offer a very limited amount of spots for coaching.
00:11:43.720 If you're interested, you can send me a message at ryan at order of man.com if that's the
00:11:48.300 case.
00:11:48.520 But I only have five coaching spots available during the month.
00:11:51.540 So if you do email me, I'm going to ask you what you're trying to accomplish.
00:11:56.220 Remember, I talked about that.
00:11:57.200 That's first and foremost.
00:11:58.540 And I'll probably ask you a lot of really annoying questions so we can see if we're truly
00:12:02.660 a fit.
00:12:03.020 But whether you reach out to me, you hire me, you look at somebody else, you get involved
00:12:07.360 with another program, you hire another coach, you find somebody who's going to be a better
00:12:10.460 fit for you.
00:12:11.500 That's what I want.
00:12:12.280 I just want you to make sure that you are getting some sort of coaching in your life.
00:12:16.140 The most elite athletes, players, people who are performing at high, high levels, all of
00:12:22.000 them have coaches.
00:12:23.460 And success leaves clues.
00:12:24.760 So I think it makes sense that if those men, elite men, are hiring people to help them get
00:12:31.280 even better, then it probably makes sense for guys like you and me to consider the same
00:12:36.500 practice of hiring people to help us get better.
00:12:40.620 Look for coaches.
00:12:41.700 Look for results.
00:12:43.120 Hire coaches.
00:12:44.120 Spend money.
00:12:44.880 Put your money where your mouth is.
00:12:47.220 Get your skin in the game and watch your success grow.
00:12:51.180 Guys, that's all I've got for you today.
00:12:52.440 Until next week, take action and become the man you are meant to be.
00:12:56.780 Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast.
00:12:59.780 You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be.
00:13:03.780 We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.