Order of Man - November 03, 2017


FFN 080： Embrace Discomfort


Episode Stats

Length

10 minutes

Words per Minute

200.51292

Word Count

2,111

Sentence Count

141


Summary

In this episode of Friday Field Notes, Ryan discusses the concept of "uncomfortable" situations and how to deal with them in order to become the best version of yourself. He also discusses the benefits of discomfort and how it can be a tool to improve your physical, mental, and emotional resilience.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.
00:00:06.020 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.
00:00:10.440 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong.
00:00:15.500 This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become.
00:00:19.760 At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.
00:00:24.720 Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Michler, and I am the host and founder of this podcast, The Order of Man.
00:00:32.000 I am honored that you are here with us today. This marks the 80th Friday Field Notes that I've done.
00:00:38.440 For those of you who may be tuning in for the first time today, this, your Friday Field Notes, is a show where I share some insights and thoughts from throughout my week.
00:00:48.200 And if you don't already know, we also have an interview show where I interview the world's most successful men.
00:00:52.940 We unpackage what it is that makes them so successful and deliver it straight to you.
00:00:57.600 We've had the opportunity now to interview some incredible men.
00:01:01.480 Guys like Jocko Willing, Tim Kennedy, Grant Cardone.
00:01:05.660 We've had Andy Frisilla on the show, Lewis Howes, Chris Peranto, so many more.
00:01:10.080 And we have got an incredible lineup coming out this quarter.
00:01:13.860 So if you haven't already done so, make sure you subscribe wherever you are listening to this podcast.
00:01:18.920 And also, if you would, I don't ask this a whole lot, but please make sure to leave us an iTunes rating and review.
00:01:25.420 I know there's a ton of you who have been listening to the show for some time now.
00:01:28.700 We don't charge for the show or guests or anything like that.
00:01:31.260 So one way that you can show your appreciation is by taking a couple of minutes, just two minutes, and leaving that review.
00:01:38.060 This helps us get the message of The Order out into the world.
00:01:40.740 I do appreciate that.
00:01:41.680 Now, one last thing before I get into my thoughts from throughout the week, I'm going to be releasing a book.
00:01:47.640 I know a lot of you guys are aware of this, a book in February of 2018.
00:01:52.560 If you want to be among the first to know about when that book comes available and is ready for purchase, head to orderofman.com slash book.
00:02:01.840 Orderofman.com slash book.
00:02:03.560 Drop your email in there, and we will be sure to let you know as soon as we possibly can.
00:02:08.240 Now, today, let's talk about this notion of embracing discomfort.
00:02:14.340 I started thinking about this because as I was writing a portion of the book this week, I started to cover a topic of strength, physical strength, mental strength, mental fortitude, emotional resiliency.
00:02:25.660 But unfortunately, if you look around in society, you see a lot of weak people.
00:02:30.780 You see a lot of weak men.
00:02:31.860 Mentally, people allow the smallest of circumstances to get a hold of them, dictate their actions.
00:02:38.280 Emotionally, many people allow their emotions to get the better of them.
00:02:41.560 We see this when people get offended by everything and anything.
00:02:46.500 And then, of course, physically, more and more people are unhealthy.
00:02:49.640 I mean, we can see that physically.
00:02:50.900 We can just look around and see how many people are unhealthy.
00:02:52.960 But if you and I have any hope, any hope of becoming the men that we are meant to be, we're going to need to learn to develop strength in each one of those areas.
00:03:02.100 And the only way in my mind to develop and gain the physical, mental, and emotional strength that we need is to embrace discomfort in our lives.
00:03:11.420 And again, unfortunately, I think we live in a time in history where discomfort is relatively low.
00:03:18.460 If you're cold, you turn on the heater.
00:03:20.480 If you're warm, you turn on the AC.
00:03:22.060 If you're hungry, you open the refrigerator and pull out some food that you didn't have to kill or prepare.
00:03:27.520 You just zap it in the microwave for a couple of minutes and you're all set.
00:03:30.980 If you have to get a hold of somebody, you can text them, you can email, you can call.
00:03:34.900 If you have an emergency or an illness, there's a doctor's office or a hospital that's fairly easy to get to.
00:03:39.740 If you need to talk with someone, there's call centers and therapists.
00:03:44.660 If you can't make your mortgage payment, there's leniency.
00:03:47.160 If you get laid off, there's unemployment.
00:03:48.740 I could go on and on about this, but I won't because you get it.
00:03:52.440 And I want you to understand that this stuff isn't bad.
00:03:54.920 It's not inherently bad in and of itself.
00:03:57.480 Modern times and technology is great.
00:04:00.500 I, for one, am not interested in reverting back to the dark ages.
00:04:04.640 But I do think that this level of comfort that we live in, it comes at a cost.
00:04:09.740 And the cost is that when we do run across something that's a little challenging, that makes us uncomfortable, we're not adequately prepared to handle it.
00:04:19.780 I think there's this trend in society where people are running away from things because they're just a little hard.
00:04:25.600 And I would urge you to consider that rather than running away from things that are uncomfortable, that we consider running towards them instead.
00:04:32.200 So, if you need to have a tough conversation, have the conversation.
00:04:36.480 It's a simple decision to do it.
00:04:37.980 If you have an opportunity to speak in public, which I know a lot of people are scared about, do it.
00:04:42.640 That's going to strengthen you.
00:04:44.320 If you're presented with a chance to compete in a race or an event, compete in the race or event.
00:04:50.520 But embracing the things that push us outside of our comfort zone, establish new benchmarks for the way that we approach the infinitely harder.
00:04:58.960 And we will the infinitely harder situations that are going to come up in our lives.
00:05:03.200 And also, this practice trains our minds and our bodies to handle, to handle those infinitely greater challenges that we're going to face.
00:05:10.520 So, what I want to do is I want to give you three very simple strategies.
00:05:13.820 And these are very simple.
00:05:15.460 But please do not overlook these strategies because of the simplicity of them.
00:05:20.620 I've used each of these strategies in my life when it comes to embracing discomfort.
00:05:24.480 And I believe I'm a stronger man for it.
00:05:26.660 So, the first thing I want to share with you is I want you to wrap your head around the notion that you need to learn to make the hard path the easy path.
00:05:35.120 Understanding that we have this natural tendency to choose the easy path, it can actually be used to our advantage.
00:05:43.440 I think most of the time we probably understand that choosing to do something difficult, something hard is the better route.
00:05:49.580 But we place so many barriers between where we are right now and where we want to be that that task becomes almost impossible to complete.
00:05:58.640 I know when I set out, for example, on my fitness journey three years ago,
00:06:01.580 one of the biggest challenges for me was getting out of bed and actually into the gym.
00:06:07.460 I didn't know what workout I was going to do.
00:06:09.340 I didn't want to get my gym clothes out in the morning.
00:06:12.240 I didn't want to get my water or pre-workout ready.
00:06:14.380 So, I stayed in bed and I did nothing.
00:06:17.240 And I know a lot of you have done that as well.
00:06:19.540 When faced with the challenge or the barrier that's placed before us, we crumble, we stop.
00:06:24.760 So, to combat this, I simply programmed my workouts the night before.
00:06:29.260 I had my gym bag ready in the morning.
00:06:31.100 I had my drink waiting for me in the fridge.
00:06:33.520 And that way, when I woke up in the morning, I had eliminated all of the barriers, all of the excuses to going into the gym.
00:06:39.680 So, first and foremost, just take some time.
00:06:42.820 Take some time to understand what barriers are keeping you from achieving what you want and find a way to tear them down or to make it a little bit easier or for you to overcome the excuses that you keep telling yourself.
00:06:56.660 Now, the second strategy is to reset the default.
00:06:59.500 I believe that our default answer is always to do whatever's easier.
00:07:05.380 We all know this and we've been doing it for so long that we rarely give ourselves the chance to even analyze, to even think and stop and ponder if that's the right answer at all.
00:07:16.380 So, what if instead we just reprogrammed our thought process to respond with whatever is the hardest as the default answer?
00:07:24.520 Now, I'm not suggesting that doing the hard thing is going to necessarily be the right answer all the time.
00:07:29.260 But I think if we make that the default, it's going to force us to stop and actually think about this, to actually think about what we should be doing in the first place.
00:07:38.960 And it's also going to give us the opportunity to consider the mantra and the title of today's show, embracing discomfort.
00:07:45.240 Now, the third strategy I want to share is that we need to learn to say yes.
00:07:49.760 I know I've talked about learning to say no in the past and there's definitely a time and a place for it.
00:07:54.420 So, don't get me wrong here.
00:07:55.480 But there's also a time and a place to say yes because saying no to the things that scare us, the things that push us, the things that make us uncomfortable, it's easy.
00:08:05.840 If you want to speak in public, the answer immediately is no.
00:08:10.180 If you want to participate in a Spartan race, no.
00:08:13.260 If you want to go to the gym this morning, no.
00:08:16.060 If you want to start a new business, no.
00:08:18.080 Very easy to say no.
00:08:19.920 And yeah, we disguise our answers, but the fact remains that if it scares us or it challenges us in any way, the answer is always no, regardless of how we've disguised that answer.
00:08:30.540 This is the reason that it's critical that we learn to say yes more often.
00:08:35.040 But you've got to be careful.
00:08:36.600 Again, you've got to be careful on this one though because you don't want to say yes to too many things.
00:08:41.100 You just want to practice saying yes more often.
00:08:44.560 You know, when I'm presented with an opportunity that I know is going to make me feel uncomfortable, that I know deep down I don't want to do because it's scary, I try to consider saying yes long before I consider saying no.
00:08:59.460 I know that these strategies sound oversimplified, but it really is a simple process.
00:09:04.180 These three key strategies have completely changed the way that I look at approaching the things I know that are going to push me outside of my comfort zone.
00:09:11.480 It's simple in theory, but I get it.
00:09:13.860 It's hard in application, but with a little practice, a little discipline, a little intentionality, you can change the way that you look at your life too.
00:09:22.320 Remember, make the hard path, the easy path.
00:09:26.080 Number two, reset the default.
00:09:28.340 And number three, learn to say yes more often.
00:09:31.200 If you want to learn more about these strategies, I'm going to give you two resources very quickly.
00:09:35.760 First, consider signing up to be alerted about when my new book comes out.
00:09:40.140 We talk a bit about this in the book and 11 other principles that I know you're going to want to learn more about and implement in your life.
00:09:47.200 You can do that at orderofman.com book and second, consider looking into our exclusive brotherhood, the iron council.
00:09:54.480 Every single member of the iron council is identifying objectives in their lives.
00:09:59.220 They're learning to embrace discomfort.
00:10:01.560 I know these guys are seeing huge results in their lives and I know you will based on the guidance and the tools and the direction that this brotherhood offers.
00:10:08.680 You can head to orderofman.com slash iron council, orderofman.com slash iron council to learn more and join us until next week, gentlemen, embrace discomfort, take action and become the man you are meant to be.
00:10:22.160 Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast.
00:10:25.020 You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be.
00:10:29.120 We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.