Order of Man - FFN 100： The Demise of Responsibility

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.

00:00:06.020 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.

00:00:10.440 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong.

00:00:15.500 This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become.

00:00:19.760 At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.

00:00:25.300 Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Michler, and I am the host and the founder of this podcast.

00:00:29.740 I want to welcome you today to the manliest podcast available for men.

00:00:34.140 That's what we're all about. We're helping you become a better man.

00:00:36.500 Of course, I'm on my own journey, and I'm glad that hundreds of thousands of other men are on the journey with me.

00:00:42.220 This is our Friday Field Notes, guys, where you get to listen to me and some of my ramblings from throughout the week.

00:00:47.140 But we do have three shows per week now. It was two, and now it's three.

00:00:51.600 This is the third show, but on Tuesdays, we have our interview show where we're interviewing the most successful men on the planet

00:00:58.900 that I can find guys like Jocko Willink, Lewis Howes, Grant Cardone, Tim Kennedy, Andy Frisilla.

00:01:05.520 I mean, you name it, we've just got an incredible lineup, and I have done quite a few interviews over the past two weeks.

00:01:10.740 I'm a little overwhelmed with as many as we've done, but man, we've got, like I said, just some incredible, incredible guests coming up.

00:01:16.940 So if you haven't done this already, just make sure you subscribe so you never miss one of these episodes.

00:01:21.380 We're talking about leadership, we're talking about communication, we're talking about teamwork and self-development,

00:01:27.400 physical fitness, getting the right mindset, overcoming hurdles and obstacles and trials.

00:01:32.620 We're having so many great conversations.

00:01:34.940 And then the third show that we do every week is something that comes out on Wednesdays from one of our Iron Council members.

00:01:42.420 His name is Everett Bubba Downs, and he hosts In the Trenches, and again, that comes out every Wednesday.

00:01:47.380 That's about interviewing ordinary, everyday guys like you and me who are in the trenches,

00:01:53.220 who are succeeding at certain things, who are still struggling in certain areas,

00:01:56.940 and really just on the journey, actually in the trenches, on the journey to become a better man and doing those things every day.

00:02:04.400 So those are the three shows that we have every single week.

00:02:06.420 Again, make sure you subscribe so you don't miss a single one of those.

00:02:09.620 We're getting some really, really good feedback on what we've put out there, and I'm glad that you're here.

00:02:13.460 Whether you're here for the first time or you've been a long-time listener,

00:02:16.060 it's good to know that there's more men in this fight.

00:02:18.400 Society needs it now more than ever, which is actually something we're going to talk about today.

00:02:22.760 But before I get into that, I do want to give you a couple of housekeeping items, a couple of announcements.

00:02:28.700 The first one, a lot of guys want to know what's next.

00:02:32.540 You know, they listen to the podcast, maybe they're on the Facebook page or the Instagram account,

00:02:36.820 wherever it may be, and they're just asking,

00:02:38.740 Okay, Ryan, I get what we're doing here.

00:02:40.740 I'm on board. I like the mission.

00:02:43.020 What do we do next? Where do we go?

00:02:44.780 And the next step from here is our exclusive brotherhood.

00:02:48.580 It's called the Iron Council.

00:02:49.880 I know a lot of you who are listening are familiar with it, at least to some degree,

00:02:53.060 but it's pretty incredible to see the growth in the Iron Council over the past two or three weeks.

00:02:57.320 One of the things that we just brought on board and we started doing,

00:02:59.980 and in fact, we did this for the very first time this morning, was having an expert guest.

00:03:05.200 Some of my podcast guests are just incredible, incredible men with so many good insights.

00:03:10.200 And in the Iron Council, what we've done is we've allowed our brothers there to have access to these men through expert sessions that we run once a month.

00:03:20.420 So we had Commander Rourke Denver, a Navy SEAL commander on this morning, and it was an incredible, incredible conversation.

00:03:28.200 And that's exclusive to our members in the Iron Council.

00:03:31.940 So if you want that, you want the brotherhood, the camaraderie, all the other things that we're doing,

00:03:35.740 head to orderofman.com slash Iron Council.

00:03:38.540 And you can learn a little bit more about what we're up to there.

00:03:41.540 So that is number one.

00:03:42.960 Number two is the store.

00:03:44.760 A lot of people don't know that we actually have a store.

00:03:47.500 And this is a great way to look good, to get some tools that are going to help you on your own personal journey.

00:03:53.120 And it's also a great way to support the show and support the movement that we have here within the order.

00:03:57.920 So if you go to store.orderofman.com, we've got hats.

00:04:02.220 We've got a few different shirts.

00:04:03.380 We've got some new shirts coming out.

00:04:04.760 We've got some patches.

00:04:05.620 We've got a leather-bound journal with the Order of Man embossed, the logo embossed on it.

00:04:12.160 We've got a annual battle planning resource called the Battle Planner.

00:04:17.400 There's so much good stuff over there.

00:04:18.760 So check it out, store.orderofman.com.

00:04:21.820 So that's it, guys.

00:04:22.700 Those are my announcements.

00:04:23.660 That's what we're all about here.

00:04:24.740 I want to get right into this conversation.

00:04:27.240 These Friday Field Notes are fast.

00:04:28.700 They're quick.

00:04:29.200 Hopefully, they're effective.

00:04:30.120 And hopefully, you're going to walk away with a new perspective.

00:04:31.940 Now, what I'm going to share with you today is this idea of responsibility.

00:04:36.160 And we're going to talk about responsibility.

00:04:37.620 We're going to talk about rights.

00:04:38.780 But what I would ask you to do is please, please share this.

00:04:42.400 This message of responsibility and rights is one that every single man on the planet needs to hear.

00:04:48.960 And you're going to hear, as I talk about this today, how needed this is in society.

00:04:53.040 So I ask that you share this through Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, wherever you are.

00:04:58.140 Send an email.

00:04:59.280 Just let other men in your life, brothers, colleagues, coworkers, cousins, fathers, whoever it may be, what we're doing here within the mission of the Order of Man and share specifically this episode.

00:05:09.680 I hope it's going to be a powerful one for you.

00:05:11.980 What I want you to do and think about as we go through this is just take a look around in society.

00:05:17.020 And I think that you'll agree with me that there seems to be more and more men who are shirking their responsibilities as men.

00:05:23.860 And I get it.

00:05:24.880 I get it.

00:05:25.420 I mean, there was a long time in my life where I did this too.

00:05:27.560 And it's really easy to understand why.

00:05:29.860 It's because it's harder.

00:05:31.540 It's harder to accept responsibility.

00:05:33.760 And that's at least initially.

00:05:35.220 I'm going to talk more about that a little bit later.

00:05:36.860 If you do accept some form of responsibility in your life, whether it's family or your physical fitness or career aspirations, what it means is that you're actually going to have to exert yourself.

00:05:48.040 You're going to have to push.

00:05:49.280 You're going to have to drive.

00:05:50.260 You have to overcome some of these obstacles that will inevitably present themselves.

00:05:54.400 You're going to have to go into the office a little bit earlier.

00:05:56.540 You're going to have to stay a little bit longer.

00:05:59.280 You'll miss the latest season of, I don't even know, Game of Thrones or whatever the series happens to be right now.

00:06:05.240 It means that you're going to have to volunteer to help a neighbor in need.

00:06:08.780 Or maybe you're serving in your church or your community.

00:06:11.680 It means you'll have to put away your own hobbies and help your child with his or her homework.

00:06:17.580 It means that the hunting trip will have to wait because your business or your family needs some attention.

00:06:23.060 And of course, when I put it that way, no sane or rational human being would want to accept more responsibility.

00:06:31.520 So what do we do instead?

00:06:32.780 What do we as a society do instead of accepting responsibility?

00:06:37.160 Well, we complain and we gripe and we moan.

00:06:39.700 And what do we gripe and moan about?

00:06:41.160 Rights and entitlements.

00:06:43.040 It's my right.

00:06:43.940 It's my entitlement.

00:06:45.340 And frankly, it's pathetic.

00:06:47.180 Think about this.

00:06:47.820 We've all heard this and maybe we've even said it.

00:06:49.460 I know I have.

00:06:50.320 It's my right to free health insurance.

00:06:52.620 It's my right to a good job.

00:06:55.100 I'm entitled to my wife's support.

00:06:57.240 My boss owes me a promotion.

00:06:59.780 You've all heard these things and most of us have probably said or at least thought some of these things as well.

00:07:05.600 That company has to serve me the way that I want to be served.

00:07:10.200 This is selfish.

00:07:11.680 This line of thinking is selfish.

00:07:14.060 It's weak.

00:07:14.780 But most importantly, it's a detriment to yourself and it's a detriment to society as a whole.

00:07:20.560 Because what happens when the majority of people begin to demand quote unquote rights without a willingness to accept some responsibility, at least for securing those rights?

00:07:30.840 Because I think we all know the answer to that question.

00:07:33.520 And just in case you don't, the answer is it collapses.

00:07:36.980 That's what happens to society.

00:07:38.700 I did a podcast a couple of weeks ago on makers and takers.

00:07:42.040 You can go back and listen to that a little bit.

00:07:43.780 But in addition to these moral obligations that we have as men to serve, and I'm going to talk more on that here in a little bit.

00:07:52.220 Accepting responsibility in your life, I believe, is the surest path, the surest path to long-term fulfillment and achievement.

00:08:03.100 Any time in my life, whether through it was my military service, career endeavors, fitness goals, family priorities, every time where I've accepted responsibility, life has always gotten better.

00:08:17.520 Always.

00:08:17.900 And here's the thing about men who shirk responsibility, they're weak, they're pathetic.

00:08:24.160 And most importantly, guys, they know it.

00:08:27.380 If you fall into this camp, you know that you're doing less than you're capable of.

00:08:32.840 From my perspective, and I'm going to have to find the research to back this up.

00:08:36.740 When a man knows that he's capable of more, yet doesn't do anything about it, he begins to experience the full brunt of his own inadequacies physically, mentally, emotionally.

00:08:52.720 But on the other hand, when a man knows he's capable of more, and he raises his hand to accept that reality, he begins to forge a new destiny.

00:09:04.280 He lays the foundation for progress in his life.

00:09:07.420 When a man accepts responsibility, he equips himself with the mindset that he needs for growth and for achievement.

00:09:14.880 When a man accepts responsibility, he tells himself, and even the world, that he is capable of stepping into the very thing that makes him a man.

00:09:24.800 And the very thing that makes him and you and me and everybody who's listening to this podcast a man is service.

00:09:31.300 At the core of what it means to be a man is to serve.

00:09:35.700 Think about even our motto, protect, provide, preside.

00:09:39.660 All three of those responsibilities have an element of service.

00:09:45.000 See, most people believe that joy comes in others serving them.

00:09:50.440 There's some destination where people will begin to serve you and that's when you'll be happy.

00:09:55.420 But I've found that to be fun for a very, very short period of time.

00:10:00.260 I have a difficult time, in fact, and I'm sure that you do as well, allowing other people to serve me.

00:10:05.320 Why?

00:10:05.700 Because why would I have other people serve me when I'm fully capable of serving myself?

00:10:11.980 If you've ever thought that way or had that thought run through your mind, congratulations, you're a man.

00:10:17.400 That's what it means to be a man.

00:10:19.180 It's self-reliance and then it's service to others.

00:10:22.460 We protect, we provide, we preside, which is synonymous with lead and leadership.

00:10:27.420 We cannot step into those roles while at the same time complain about what rights we have and what we're entitled to and what we're owed.

00:10:37.360 Men earn their accomplishments.

00:10:39.020 Boys don't.

00:10:40.540 Take your sons.

00:10:41.320 If you have sons, for example.

00:10:43.260 Yeah, they may earn some money by doing some chores around the house.

00:10:46.120 But at the end of the day, that burden of responsibility for your family, for them and you and your wife and everybody, it falls upon you, you as the head of the household.

00:10:57.480 Now, what we see in society is a bunch of boys running around in men's bodies. 0.96

00:11:01.740 They're doing just enough, just enough not to get fired.

00:11:05.040 They still mooch off mommy and daddy and potentially still live at home. 0.99

00:11:10.080 They expect their wives to go out into the workforce and do the work of men. 1.00

00:11:13.860 They collect unemployment and other benefits that they didn't earn knowing full well they're capable of putting their own food on their own table.

00:11:23.160 Then, and this is what makes it worse, they wonder why they don't feel fulfilled or satisfied or why people don't take them seriously.

00:11:31.080 It's because you don't even take yourself seriously.

00:11:33.580 Why should anyone else either?

00:11:36.140 If you want to call yourself a man, lead yourself, serve yourself, then work to serve others.

00:11:46.860 But here's the problem, guys.

00:11:49.080 Society says that it's okay that you act like a lazy, immature, pathetic, mediocre slob.

00:11:58.460 We see this when we don't allow our children to fail and we even reward them for simply showing up.

00:12:05.140 We recite these cute little phrases like showing up is half the battle.

00:12:09.480 No, showing up is the ticket to entry.

00:12:11.820 It's nothing more.

00:12:13.020 It's nothing less.

00:12:13.900 It's not half the battle.

00:12:14.960 It's not even the battle.

00:12:16.020 It's not part of the battle.

00:12:17.200 We see this when we allow government handouts to be divvied up to anyone indefinitely without any requirements or accountability.

00:12:26.640 We give unemployment benefits to fully qualified men and women. 0.87

00:12:30.040 We allow bankruptcies to wipe away and absolve any poor financial choices.

00:12:34.600 We forgive.

00:12:35.680 We forget.

00:12:36.580 We strip citizens of the benefits of the negative consequences of their choices.

00:12:41.020 Think about that for a second.

00:12:42.480 I said benefit, benefit of the negative consequences of their choices.

00:12:48.900 And that benefit of experiencing the full brunt of your poor choices is that you learn not to do it again.

00:12:56.300 But if you're saved and you're rescued, every time you do something dumb, you're going to continue to do dumb things.

00:13:03.640 There are so many weak people in society.

00:13:06.880 It's hard for me to even bear at times.

00:13:09.240 Everyone wants to save people from themselves.

00:13:11.920 Oh, what if they make a mistake?

00:13:13.680 We need to rescue them.

00:13:14.540 They'll cry with these big tears from their eyes.

00:13:17.600 No, what you need to do is let people rescue themselves through the action of taking responsibility.

00:13:25.500 We are too quick, guys, too quick in my mind to discount human ingenuity, human resolve, and resilience.

00:13:34.380 But look, I get it.

00:13:35.720 I understand.

00:13:36.880 I know this sounds like I'm on a soapbox and I'm preaching this stuff to you guys.

00:13:40.440 But I understand because life is hard.

00:13:43.480 There are days that I want to curl up in my bed and frankly do nothing.

00:13:48.120 But that isn't really an option for me.

00:13:51.000 Why?

00:13:51.940 Because I've raised my hand and I've said that I am a man.

00:13:56.560 And a man acts like a man, which means that he gets out of bed.

00:14:02.080 He does what it needs to be done for himself and for his family.

00:14:06.120 He does his work with honor.

00:14:08.240 He takes pride in what he does.

00:14:10.020 He serves those in his community and under his care.

00:14:12.840 And he earns everything he has.

00:14:16.640 This isn't easy.

00:14:17.920 I get it.

00:14:19.100 It's hard to exert yourself.

00:14:20.780 Anytime we strive to do something great, there's going to be forces and friction working against us.

00:14:27.540 That's what makes it so hard.

00:14:29.520 But here's the deal.

00:14:30.480 You get to choose your heart.

00:14:32.140 You can take the easy path now and defer the full fury of your weak choices down the road.

00:14:38.900 Or you can decide to take the hard path today.

00:14:43.220 The hard path right now.

00:14:44.820 And I'm not talking about doing things just for the sake of being hard.

00:14:49.280 I'm talking about doing the things you know you should be doing now.

00:14:53.720 Today.

00:14:54.640 When you do, life has a way of becoming more enjoyable, more fulfilling, more rewarding,

00:15:00.900 and of course, more achievement that comes with it.

00:15:03.520 Life is going to be hard.

00:15:04.940 That's guaranteed.

00:15:06.320 But you, again, get to choose your heart.

00:15:09.340 Do you voluntarily say, I will take the hard path now.

00:15:13.200 I will accept responsibility for my life and those people under my care.

00:15:18.520 Or do you put it off and put it off and put it off and live a life less than you're capable of?

00:15:26.380 I hope that you and everybody who's going to listen to this makes the right choice.

00:15:30.480 Because Lord knows that we need it now more than ever among men.

00:15:35.260 So guys, that's the message I wanted to share.

00:15:38.020 Obviously, on my soapbox, a little fired up about this.

00:15:40.920 I've been thinking about it for the past week and significantly longer.

00:15:44.600 Why we neglect and shirk these responsibilities.

00:15:49.040 And I think if we want to reclaim truly what it means to be a man,

00:15:53.320 then part of that journey, a large part of that journey,

00:15:56.300 is to begin to accept responsibility and not rely so heavily upon the rights that we think we deserve.

00:16:03.640 So guys, that's all I have for you today.

00:16:05.180 A couple of just quick announcements as I wind down.

00:16:08.260 I mentioned the Brotherhood, the Iron Council.

00:16:10.980 We're learning about this.

00:16:12.320 We're learning how to take responsibility.

00:16:13.720 You've got the tools and the accountability and the resources and the guidance and the direction

00:16:17.820 and the expert guests that come on once a month.

00:16:20.480 It's really, truly an incredible brotherhood of guys working together,

00:16:24.600 banding together and doing some amazing things.

00:16:27.660 So if you're interested in that, orderofman.com slash Iron Council.

00:16:31.360 I also mentioned the store.

00:16:32.760 If you want to see what we have, I particularly like all the hats that we have.

00:16:36.160 I think we've got about five or six different iterations of Order of Man hats.

00:16:39.680 So if you're a hat guy, that's a good place to check out.

00:16:41.480 If you want a shirt, patch, whatever it may be, store.orderofman.com.

00:16:45.220 So guys, I will sign out with that today.

00:16:47.300 Remember, just work on accepting responsibility.

00:16:50.360 Stop relying upon this weak idea of rights and what people owe me and instead take the higher calling, which is responsibility.

00:16:57.800 So with that said, make it a great week.

00:17:00.820 Make it a great weekend.

00:17:02.220 Until next week, take action and become the man you are meant to be.

00:17:06.120 Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast.

00:17:09.040 If you're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be,

00:17:13.060 we invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.

00:17:16.200 We'll see you next week.

00:17:17.200 We'll see you next week.

00:17:17.620 We'll see you next week.

Order of Man - March 23, 2018

FFN 100： The Demise of Responsibility

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