Order of Man - Forging Mental Toughness

00:00:00.000 We all know that we need to be mentally tough. There's no question of that. Yet forging mental

00:00:04.300 toughness seems to be one of the most elusive pursuits. All of us know how to develop physical

00:00:09.500 toughness, but rarely do we have any practices in place that will help us develop mental toughness.

00:00:15.380 My guest today, Ryan Lang, is one of the most mentally tough men I know. It's amazing considering

00:00:20.600 he's only 21 years old. I won't get into all that he's accomplished yet, but please understand the

00:00:25.920 amount of physical strain he's put on his body is simply incredible. Today we talk about developing

00:00:32.100 the capacity to transcend pain, fostering the willingness to embrace hardship, why hard work

00:00:38.200 is omnipotent, and how to forge more mental toughness. You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest,

00:00:45.260 embrace your fears, and boldly chart your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more

00:00:51.000 time. Every time. You are not easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong. This is your

00:00:58.220 life. This is who you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is

00:01:03.940 said and done, you can call yourself a man. Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is

00:01:09.460 Ryan Mickler, and I am the host and the founder of this podcast and this movement, The Order of Man.

00:01:14.780 Guys, we've been going strong for about three and a half years now. Three years ago, I never would

00:01:20.180 have imagined what we have grown this to up to this point, and it's a testament to the fact that

00:01:25.120 the message of restoring and reclaiming what it means to be a man is needed now more than ever.

00:01:31.800 You look around in society, and I see a lot of weak men. I see men who don't want to step into

00:01:37.860 their calling, who don't want to step into their responsibility and obligations and roles and duties

00:01:43.160 that we have as men, and frankly, it's a little disheartening to say the least, but I'm inspired by

00:01:49.320 you guys. Each and every day, you are sharing messages with me, sharing your insights, sharing

00:01:54.120 your stories, telling me how you're salvaging your marriages, how you're losing weight, how you're

00:01:58.100 starting businesses, how you're doing the things that you've always talked about doing, and because

00:02:02.320 I get to hear from you every single day, I'm inspired to continue to do this podcast, and

00:02:07.200 on the topic of this podcast, if you're not yet familiar with what we're doing here, this

00:02:11.240 is a podcast designed to interview great men with inspiring stories who are doing incredible

00:02:17.440 things in their lives. New York Times bestselling authors, warriors, scholars, athletes, entrepreneurs,

00:02:24.280 you name it. If he's got an interesting story to share, and they're achieving success in their

00:02:28.780 life, we are going to interview those people, bring them on the podcast, share their wisdom,

00:02:33.840 their insights, their lessons, and their experiences with you. So guys, with that said, I am glad that

00:02:39.740 you're here again, whether you're visiting for the first time, or you've been listening for the

00:02:43.320 past three years, or somewhere in between. I don't want to get into too many announcements today. I do

00:02:47.980 want to introduce you to our show sponsor, and more importantly than that, and you've heard me talk

00:02:51.920 about this over the past couple of months, Pete Roberts, the founder of Origin, is a friend of mine.

00:02:56.940 In fact, later in the year, I'm going to their immersion camp in August out in Maine. So I'm going

00:03:01.960 to check out their factory and their outfit they've got, as well as learn some jujitsu and spend some

00:03:07.320 time with him, and I believe Jocko's going to be out there as well. They are show sponsors as well.

00:03:13.320 Their products, their geese, their rash guards, their training gear. I also use their nutritional

00:03:17.480 line that's partnered up with Jocko. It's the discipline, which is their pre-workout. It's the

00:03:22.920 joint warfare and the super krill. That's what I personally use. I love these guys. I love what

00:03:28.320 they're doing. I am particularly interested in the reason that we had even connected in the first place

00:03:33.460 with their story. Stories are so powerful, and a lot of companies these days seem to just want to

00:03:40.040 push a product, whatever they can make the cheapest and get it out the quickest, and that's

00:03:43.520 what they want to do. That's not what the guys at Origin, Maine are doing. They are making everything

00:03:48.560 in America without compromise. So if you're interested in what they're up to, you're interested

00:03:53.640 in this type of lifestyle, you're interested in their training gear, their supplements and

00:03:58.400 everything they have going on, head to originmaine.com slash order of man originmaine.com slash order

00:04:04.880 of man. That way we know where you found out about them. So originmaine.com slash order of man,

00:04:09.800 and then make sure for a discount, you use the code order, all caps, O-R-D-E-R at checkout to get

00:04:15.840 your discount. Again, originmaine.com slash order of man, and use the code order at checkout.

00:04:22.460 Guys, with that said, I'm going to just announce one other thing that I haven't mentioned for a

00:04:26.020 little bit. It's our order of man legacy event. Not going to get into too much on the specifics of

00:04:30.300 that, but September 20th through 23rd, 2018, we've got a father son event going on. I think

00:04:36.680 we're about 40% filled and I've only mentioned it a couple of times. If you've got a son between the

00:04:41.780 ages of eight and 15 and want to create a rite of passage for you and your boy, you need to check

00:04:47.880 this out. Head to order of man.com slash legacy. Do it quick. We're going to fill that up. It's here

00:04:52.800 in the mountains of Southern Utah, and it's going to be an absolutely incredibly inspiring weekend for

00:04:57.360 both you and your son. Again, order of man.com slash legacy. All right, enough of that. Let's

00:05:02.920 get into the show. I've got a great guest lined up for you today. His name is Ryan Lang. He reached

00:05:09.220 out to me several months ago and asked to come on the podcast. Honestly, guys, at first thought I

00:05:15.680 wasn't going to have him on the podcast because so many people talk about mental toughness. It's a

00:05:21.860 little like saying that you want to talk about leadership. There's so many people out there talking

00:05:26.580 about these two topics, but then I actually started looking into what this kid has done.

00:05:31.340 And I say kid because he's only 20 years old. So I'm not saying that as a position of looking down

00:05:37.840 on him, but rather I'm amazed at what he's been able to do in a very short period of time. He's

00:05:44.140 completed 50 K's, 50 milers, a hundred mile race. And at the end of last year, he actually

00:05:50.840 completed a 238 mile race in Moab, Utah. And just to give you an idea of what that even means,

00:05:58.600 it took him roughly 86 hours to complete. So needless to say, this is a man who knows a little

00:06:06.660 bit about physical pain, physical toughness, grit, resiliency, resolve, fortitude, and the mental

00:06:13.320 capacity it takes to participate in events like that. So guys, I hope you enjoy this show. I hope that

00:06:20.360 you walk away inspired to push yourself mentally and physically and emotionally a little farther

00:06:26.180 than maybe you have in the past and realize the capacity and the power that we have with our ability

00:06:31.300 to push our bodies and minds to the fullest. Ryan, what's up, man? Thanks for joining me on

00:06:37.360 the show today. Ryan, how are you, dude? I'm excited to be here. Yeah. It's been a little while. I think

00:06:41.200 we've been talking for what, three, four months or so now. It seems like. Yeah. Just about we both

00:06:44.860 finally got a time that we can both be chatting together. Well, you're busy. We were backed up on

00:06:48.860 podcast guest and, you know, quite honestly, like, let me be real with you here for a minute. Cause I

00:06:52.980 get a lot of requests for podcast interviews and you had reached out and initially I'm like,

00:06:57.760 I don't know. And then you told me a little bit more about your story and how old you are,

00:07:01.620 which I want to talk about that. And some of the things that you've accomplished. I'm like, man,

00:07:04.720 this guy's actually doing some amazing, amazing things. So I had to revisit my initial, like,

00:07:08.760 I don't know. And like I said, I'm glad to have you on the show today though. Yeah. Thank you. I

00:07:12.300 appreciate that. So fill us in. I mean, first things first, let's just start with your age. All right.

00:07:16.220 Let's just get that out of the way. I'm sure that's what a lot of people talk about. Obviously

00:07:19.320 most of the guests I've had on my show are probably more like my age, maybe older. I'm 36 years old,

00:07:23.780 but tell everybody how old you are. I'm only 20 years old. I'm in college still. It's been tough

00:07:29.240 to get people to respect what I'm saying and the experience that I have. It's tough for people to

00:07:34.200 understand, ah, he's just 20. So I can't learn anything from him. I think I have a lot to offer to

00:07:39.440 anyone and especially your listeners. I agree with that. And as much as it pains me to say,

00:07:43.840 I kind of fell into that boat as well. I'm like, I don't know, 20 years old, like how much life

00:07:47.280 experience could he possibly have? You know what I'm saying?

00:07:49.420 No, it's totally understandable.

00:07:50.860 It's really interesting though, because the one thing that stood out to me was this race that you

00:07:55.060 did, which was the Moab 240. When was that race? When does that race take place?

00:07:59.400 That race was the first time that Candace put it on. It is in October, early October.

00:08:04.680 Okay. Yeah. And I don't know if you know, but Moab's like two and a half hours from where I'm at.

00:08:09.500 Yeah. Oh, really? You're in Salt Lake city, aren't you? Are you close to Salt Lake city?

00:08:14.020 I'm Southern Utah. So I'm in the other way.

00:08:16.220 Oh, okay. Oh, so you were right near.

00:08:18.160 Yeah. Yeah. We're really close. And we go up to Moab, but we don't run. We take the four wheelers

00:08:22.060 and the Jeeps and things like that. I prefer to lead that to the mechanics rather than

00:08:25.340 my own body being out there in the desert like that.

00:08:29.200 That's still a lot of fun. I'll tell you that.

00:08:31.080 Man, that's crazy. So let's talk about this race for a second, because I think we need to really

00:08:35.280 paint the picture and build a framework for the discussion we're going to have, which is

00:08:39.240 one of mental toughness and fortitude. But tell me what that race is. Like, I don't even think

00:08:45.080 people can really wrap their heads around that or fathom what we're talking about when we say the

00:08:50.020 Moab 240.

00:08:51.580 Right. So a lot of people, when I tell them 240 miles, there's, you know, they go to, Oh,

00:08:55.640 it's a stage race. And it's not the clock starts and you have, I think it was 110 hour limit

00:09:01.740 to go 240 miles with 30,000 feet of climb and 30,000 feet of descent. The big issue with this

00:09:09.380 race was we were going from, you know, 75, 76 degrees into as low as nine degrees at night.

00:09:18.080 So there was times where it was tripping me up to my dad's like, you got to take a jacket. I'm like,

00:09:23.500 why? He's like, you know, and then it hits me, you know, I'm not going to see an aid station or

00:09:27.320 another human for five to six hours. You know, it is bright out right now. It's two, three o'clock,

00:09:32.800 but come when the sun's down, it gets cold. And then if you're at the top of an ascent,

00:09:37.580 you're at the top of a mountain, you got that wind coming in on you too. So there was actually an

00:09:41.540 aid station. It was so cold that when I got there, all of the soda, some of the food, some of the

00:09:47.600 pastries were actually frozen. It's messed with your head for sure. The biggest thing for me was

00:09:52.780 never, ever thinking about how long I had to go. It was just getting to my dad, getting to see my

00:09:58.140 dad's next aid station, getting more food in me. But the race itself was very exposed to a lot of

00:10:03.340 these trail races. You're in the trees. You know, the sun's not on you all day. This was, there was

00:10:08.180 not many trees out. I'm sure, you know, out in Moab. So you're running when the sun's up, it is up on you

00:10:13.240 all day long. And I'm sure anyone can understand that the sun takes a lot of energy out of you as well.

00:10:18.760 Not just saying it's 240 miles, but having all these other factors play a role in

00:10:22.720 to it, it was tough, but an amazing, amazing experience.

00:10:27.040 I saw you, I saw pictures of Cam Haynes. And I mean, with all due respect, you guys look like

00:10:31.860 hell after that. So I can only imagine what you actually experienced and went through.

00:10:36.160 So you had your jacket. What else did you carry? Did you carry food? Like what does your pack look

00:10:39.480 like? There's two water bottles right on my chest. And then I have a three liter water bladder in my

00:10:45.920 back. And then I'm stuffed in food, gels, anything, anywhere that I can. It doesn't matter if I pack

00:10:52.560 on about eight pounds of me, you're burning maybe 10,000 calories within a six, seven hour period.

00:10:59.420 You're going to need to be replacing that. And if you're out there without any food,

00:11:03.240 you're going into some serious trouble. I'll tell you that. Because I don't know if you or

00:11:07.180 anyone's ever experienced having actually no energy on you. You begin to get colder. You physically cannot

00:11:14.040 run. It's called bonking in ultra running. And that is something that could ruin people's races.

00:11:19.440 But I was lucky enough to be on top of that the entire time to not have that happen to me.

00:11:25.820 And so how far apart were the aid stations? Because it sounds like your dad was leapfrogging

00:11:29.400 ahead of you. How far between those stations?

00:11:32.420 The shortest one was, I think, 13 miles. Then the longest one, there was a 19 mile stretch

00:11:37.500 just during the hottest part of the hottest day. That was a lot of people that I was encountering

00:11:42.140 saying they were running out of water and they were walking. So around, you know,

00:11:46.180 from a half marathon to a little under 20 miles. Average, I'd say about 15, 16.

00:11:50.680 How long did it take you? At 110 hours, how long did it take you?

00:11:53.800 It took me 86 hours and 16 minutes total. Yeah. Yeah. Right around there.

00:11:59.480 What was your sleep schedule like?

00:12:01.420 You don't sleep much on these. So I slept 10 minutes the first night. And you'd really be

00:12:06.960 surprised what 10 minutes does to the brain, a quick recharge. I took another 10 minute nap midday

00:12:13.240 next day. I took an hour nap, the start of night two and a two hour nap before the last day. So

00:12:22.260 you're, you know, over 86 hours sleeping about, well, it was, you know, four ish hours. You know,

00:12:29.700 that's when the brain starts to, starts to play some tricks on you.

00:12:32.980 I did a 60 hour endurance event and please don't misunderstand me. It's nothing like what you

00:12:38.200 experienced because we weren't burning fuel and we weren't just running the entire time,

00:12:42.460 but it was a 60 hour endurance event. I think we got about three and a half hours of sleep and my

00:12:47.880 mind was playing tricks on me, man. Like I was hallucinating almost to the point where I started

00:12:51.680 having conversations with people on the trail who weren't there. Did you experience any of that?

00:12:56.100 Like any weird things with your mind or your, your mind playing tricks on you?

00:12:59.380 That was kind of part of the reason I wanted to do a race like this is I want to experience those

00:13:04.080 hallucinations. There was one point where I thought I saw a dog down the trail and started

00:13:08.860 to like call the dog to come to me. And I got closer and closer and it was just a log. And I was

00:13:13.520 like, Oh my God, it just happened. So let's talk about your reason for doing this because obviously

00:13:18.920 this is not a beginner race. This is not something that you just decide one day, like, Oh, I think

00:13:24.000 I'll go for a nice casual 240 mile run. What does this look like for you? Is this something

00:13:29.360 your dad's got you involved with? Are you running since the time you were little? Like how did this

00:13:33.180 whole evolution take place for you? About fall of 2016. So a little over a year ago, I wanted to

00:13:40.740 run a marathon and I was a little overweight and I was just sick of being, you know, that anchor,

00:13:46.460 that guy that couldn't really move. So I started running in the spring of 2015, excuse me, spring of

00:13:52.000 2016. So wait, so hold it. So you've only been doing this for two years. Yeah. My first ultra is

00:13:58.560 actually a week, a year ago, a week from this upcoming weekend, which is bad water Cape Fear 50

00:14:04.800 miler. I wanted to be healthier. That was the beginning of it. And then I found with finishing

00:14:09.880 a marathon that the feeling of, of working very hard and wanting to succeed and then falling through

00:14:17.020 and crossing that finish line was a feeling that I was beyond addicted to. So that's what brought me

00:14:23.020 into doing, you know, I did a marathon, double it. Let's do 50 miles. And then I got down the 50 miler

00:14:28.800 and I sat down and I was like, wow, dad, I can do a hundred. My dad's not a runner at all. There's no

00:14:34.240 runners in my family. I just found this avenue of being able to build mental strength, mental fortitude

00:14:41.420 in running. I'm addicted to it. I'm addicted to working hard and seeing results. It is a feeling

00:14:48.180 that I wish everyone could taste because I think if everyone understood it and grasped it,

00:14:54.040 this world would be a better place. I want to talk about this mental toughness

00:14:58.020 component of it. But before I get into that, do you think running is something that everybody can

00:15:03.780 build up mental toughness through that? Let me give you some backstory here. Like I've actually been

00:15:07.840 over the past couple of weeks considering training for a marathon. And quite honestly,

00:15:13.300 running is something that I despise. I don't enjoy running and I don't think I'm all that great at it.

00:15:19.620 I mean, I'm sure that there's people who are built for running, but is this something like everybody

00:15:23.640 can do or is this reserved for a few people? Honestly, I think it's everyone and anyone can do

00:15:29.420 it. I was not a runner. I was about 225 pounds. I hated going to the conditioning practices for

00:15:35.560 football in high school. I always complained when that we had to do long distance. And I think

00:15:40.760 that's what makes it such a great thing for building mental toughness is there's not a lot

00:15:45.300 of people out there that do like running. Running is suffering. Suffering you cannot enjoy. You can

00:15:49.420 really only embrace suffering and learn from suffering. In my honest opinion, I think hearing

00:15:55.480 you say you don't like running is the perfect opportunity to take up running, to build that mental

00:16:01.140 strength, to go through suffering and build that mental muscle. That's how you build mental strength

00:16:06.780 is you do stuff that is not enjoyable, that takes you out of your comfort zone. To answer your

00:16:11.880 question, anyone, in my opinion, whether you're 130 pounds or if you're 300 pounds or if you hate

00:16:19.380 running or if you find joy in running, anyone can take this up. I can definitely see how that's the

00:16:24.800 case because I can go on a run around my neighborhood and run, you know, three, four miles or whatever it

00:16:28.980 may be. And I know the first thing to go is not my legs. It's not my conditioning. It's not my lungs.

00:16:33.940 It's always the internal scripts like this is stupid. Why are you doing this? This hurts. This

00:16:39.480 is a waste of time. You could be doing other things. And there's all these little mental stories

00:16:43.420 that I'm telling myself as how bad it is when in all reality, my body isn't really experiencing the

00:16:49.260 depth of what my mind is saying. I totally agree with that. And that's, that's where your thoughts

00:16:54.140 want to go. You don't want to go through the suffering. Your brain is not wired to want that.

00:16:59.060 It's combating those thoughts and spinning those thoughts into something to say, oh, this sucks.

00:17:05.000 You know what? Because this sucks, I'm only going to come out of this run better instead of,

00:17:09.580 oh, this sucks. I'm wasting my time kind of thing.

00:17:12.780 So you were 225 at your highest. What do you weigh now?

00:17:15.800 I'm about 178 now.

00:17:17.900 Yeah. So you've lost almost 50 pounds.

00:17:20.100 Yeah.

00:17:20.320 So you decided 2015, you want to run a marathon and you hadn't run anything before that. I mean,

00:17:26.200 maybe here and there and in practice and things like that, but you're 225, you realize you want

00:17:31.200 to run a marathon. Now what?

00:17:33.140 I just went out and started running. I had no idea. I had no idea what shoes to wear. I was

00:17:36.680 wearing Converse sometimes. I had no idea how to fuel my body, you know, and that led into some early

00:17:42.660 injuries. I get people asking me all the time, Hey, you know, I'm getting IT band syndrome. Hey,

00:17:47.900 I'm getting stress fractures. You know, I learned that if I don't take vitamin D with calcium every

00:17:52.800 day, then I'm going to start to get stress fractures. If I go a week without it, I start

00:17:56.740 to feel it in my legs. I've learned the anatomy of the foot and the care of the foot and how much

00:18:02.040 stretching really is helpful. You need to be stretching constantly. So your body's not getting

00:18:08.020 out of shape in that aspect. But now in the beginning it was, you know, I was going in blind.

00:18:12.560 I was just like, Oh, there's people that run, they lose weight. I'm going to do that.

00:18:15.780 You know, I didn't know how, you know, do it correctly. But in the beginning I did start to

00:18:20.900 lose weight and people acknowledged it and I got addicted to that. So I started learning

00:18:27.080 how to go further. But yeah, in the beginning it was, it was nothing pretty, but worked it out.

00:18:33.100 That's the key, right? You just start, you just get going and then eventually you learn and you

00:18:37.220 develop and you grow or you throw in the towel, which you haven't done. And it doesn't sound like

00:18:40.920 you will do. I think a lot of people do that, but if you just stick with it for long enough,

00:18:44.580 you start to learn these things, right? And, you know, I found something that has

00:18:48.360 worked for me based off my lifestyle. Like you posted today, you know, it might not be

00:18:52.920 keep trying. It might be try something else. And I'm just lucky enough to have found this

00:18:58.040 side hustle, if you will, that I can develop discipline in and I'm passionate about.

00:19:03.640 How has this helped in other areas of life? Because right now you're going to college,

00:19:06.840 but you also work. I mean, you've got a lot going on. So how does this translate?

00:19:10.320 And then maybe even talk about how this, I don't want to use the word distraction,

00:19:14.900 but how do you fit this into a busy schedule? Honestly, I've heard it from other people.

00:19:20.100 Life is so much easier going through this insane hardship, all this pain, all at once. So

00:19:26.520 concentrated, it makes you not take regular life for granted. It makes regular life when you're not

00:19:33.320 suffering, you know, you have these little stressors of I'm late for this, or I forgot this

00:19:37.820 little things that happen. It doesn't bug me anymore. You know, I have that in the back of

00:19:41.940 my head. I have it in my back pocket. Dude, you ran 240 miles. Quit your complaining. That might

00:19:46.760 sound a little arrogant, a little cocky in a way, but mentally in your head, being able to pull out

00:19:51.900 of my pocket, it's like, all right, this is nothing. Let me bang this out or all right,

00:19:55.660 no big deal. Shit happens, whatever. One of the biggest challenges I have, and I've always had this

00:20:00.660 challenge is like finding people who are as motivated and as vicious as I am and surrounding

00:20:05.540 myself with those people. But I imagine this is infinitely harder for you because you're 20 years

00:20:10.440 old. I know what I was thinking about when I was 20 and it wasn't running marathons and ultra

00:20:15.580 marathons and 240 miles in the desert by myself. How do you find a support group that helps you with

00:20:21.980 this stuff? Or do you? I had this conversation with my dad at dinner the other day. I don't,

00:20:26.700 I don't have that. You know, I've expressed frustration to him that I can't find other guys that are down to

00:20:31.780 drive up two hours to just go run mountains and check out how sweet it is up at the top of this

00:20:36.760 ascent. It's really tough. And that's why I've leaned to hanging out with, you know, 30, 35 year olds

00:20:43.400 that are down to adventure like this. This is why I emailed you to, you know, to talk about being on

00:20:47.720 a podcast, but I want more people like you in my life. You know what I mean? It's very hard to find people

00:20:53.660 that aren't just want to wake up, do their homework and then go party or play Xbox. That's part of my

00:20:59.200 balance. Every once in a while I indulge in that kind of those activities, but it's tough to find

00:21:04.120 people that realize that I have this time at college to do some pretty crazy things because I

00:21:10.660 have some free time on my hands. Let's go ahead and do that. It's hard to find people to understand

00:21:16.740 that we have this opportunity. Let's have some fun with it. Your initiative is really the only reason

00:21:23.040 that we're talking because again, I've had other people reach out and it hasn't worked or for whatever

00:21:28.740 reason and they give up, but you were persistent. I've got a 15 year old kid here in the neighborhood

00:21:33.120 who asked me if we had some work around the house. He knows me and my family. And, and my wife said,

00:21:38.540 yeah, we've got some work. Why don't you come by next week? And I fully, fully expected him not to

00:21:43.340 come by. And he showed up. He's like, Hey, I'm here ready to work. What do you need me to do? And I

00:21:47.620 pointed some things out and he came over here over a period of two days and just cranked it out.

00:21:52.120 And I think more and more of this level of discipline, this level of initiative,

00:21:56.760 being a self-starter seems to be some virtues that are diminishing to say the least.

00:22:02.920 That kid's going places. That's awesome to hear. I wish I could hear more stories of that.

00:22:07.520 I totally agree with you. I think people have a tough time finding that initial motivator that they

00:22:14.140 could turn into drive and build discipline with finding more kids like that is really what I think.

00:22:21.860 And from what I can interpret, what part of your mission is to make men realize that it is their

00:22:27.980 responsibility to be self-starters, to be disciplined like this.

00:22:33.400 So let's talk about motivation because one of the things that you talk quite a bit about,

00:22:36.900 and I believe this is true is that you have the ability to turn external motivation into,

00:22:42.360 into drive into actually making this work. And I think it's very easy for a lot of us to get hyped

00:22:47.120 up at an event or hear this podcast and think, well, I'm going to go run a marathon.

00:22:51.860 And then real world happens, right? And things come up and life happens and we don't. How do

00:22:57.580 you actually turn being temporarily motivated by some external factor into internal drive that's

00:23:05.600 going to propel you forward? It's tough to do the way I found to do it. It's through your

00:23:11.020 perspective. It's thinking, like you said, get the motivation from this awesome workout guy or this

00:23:16.520 really crazy runner. And you're like, I'm going to go out and do this. And then you go out and do it.

00:23:20.000 And you're like, ah, this sucks. You know, he was born to do this. He's just better than me.

00:23:23.820 No, no, no, no, no. That's, that's not the case at all. All it is, is he's just a little bit further

00:23:29.620 down the path. He's just put the work in. He's just a man that has seen and envisioned a future

00:23:35.600 for himself through this, which is what people need to do to take that motivation and turn it into

00:23:41.400 drive. Cause drive is what stays drive. Doesn't come and go motivation comes and goes.

00:23:46.680 It's only in your head. It's only your thoughts. There's no one that could put drive into you.

00:23:53.160 They can put motivation, but you're the one that needs to realize that drive and realize that that

00:23:57.920 person's no better than you. They're no stronger, no faster, no, no smarter. They've just put in the

00:24:03.460 work and they're just a little bit further down the path and you could see them down the path.

00:24:07.540 You just got to get there. There's no teleporting through. There's no jumping around. You have to

00:24:12.380 walk down the path that they walked down. Yeah. I mean, that's such a realistic view.

00:24:17.020 And I think you're right when you said that, you know, some people are just better or they were

00:24:20.520 born to do this, or they have the natural inclination to be good at fill in the blank.

00:24:24.900 And very rarely has that been the case in my experience. Like the people that I see that are

00:24:29.660 successful have overcome some tremendous odds and they're a success in spite of their circumstances,

00:24:37.100 not necessarily because of it. So let's go back to this Moab 240 for a minute here. I mean,

00:24:42.520 you're, you're 80 plus hours into this thing. Are you allowed to listen to music on these events?

00:24:47.480 I know some you can and others you can't. Yeah, you can. Did a lot of podcasts,

00:24:51.380 did a lot of your podcasts. That's right, man. I helped in some small way, right?

00:24:54.860 You did. You did.

00:24:55.780 No, I'm not even going to begin to take any credit for any of that.

00:24:59.740 No, you are. The race director kind of hinted at maybe not a great idea to be blasting music in

00:25:06.000 your ears. So you could still kind of hear your surroundings or hear something goes on.

00:25:10.220 I especially need that distraction tactic because that's what got me through most of the race.

00:25:15.360 I also had a pacer for 90 or excuse me, 80 of the 240 miles. Having someone else to talk to at night

00:25:22.840 when you're sleep deprived and, and, you know, not feeling great. That was another way to kind of

00:25:28.000 get the headphones out of my ears. But yeah, you were allowed to have them.

00:25:31.240 Is that pacer a participant or is that somebody on your team?

00:25:34.200 So that was a coach that I met in Colorado. I had him come out and just ran with me here and

00:25:41.540 there, slept when he could. My dad would pick him up at an aid station and then he'd go back to the

00:25:46.620 hotel, sleep for four or five hours and then drop me off, drop him off. You know, one night was

00:25:50.660 falling to be with me again. No, he was not a participant. He did not enter the race. He was just

00:25:55.640 there for me. Mental toughness is such a critical skill to develop. And again, it's one that's

00:26:02.520 frequently overlooked. The trick with developing mental toughness is that you've got to put yourself

00:26:07.560 in uncomfortable situations to expand yourself and your experiences. And this is a big part of

00:26:13.800 what we're doing inside of the iron council. Each and every week we issue two separate challenges.

00:26:18.960 And in fact, we're right in the middle of a 30 day wellness challenge. And these things are

00:26:23.860 designed to push you mentally, physically, emotionally. You know, you can choose not to do them,

00:26:28.740 but I will tell you in my experience, the men who push outside of their comfort zone typically

00:26:34.660 produce on such a higher level than those who simply maintain the status quo and stay complacent

00:26:41.080 in their life. So if you're ready to step outside of your comfort zone, try some different things

00:26:45.800 banned with other men who are doing the same. I would encourage you to join us in the iron council,

00:26:51.440 head to order of man.com slash iron council to learn a little bit more. And of course,

00:26:55.900 claim your seat again, order of man.com slash iron council. You can do that after the show.

00:27:01.180 In the meantime, we'll get back to the conversation with Ryan.

00:27:05.400 How did you avoid getting into your own head? Cause I imagine there's times during the 80 hours

00:27:09.940 where you were thinking, you know, this, I'm going to quit or why am I doing this? I can only imagine

00:27:15.160 the things going through your head. So how do you get out of that space?

00:27:18.900 Only thinking, get to the next aid station. Never, ever. I didn't even have a watch that tracked how far

00:27:24.380 I was. Really? No, because I did not want to ever look down and be like, ah, another eight miles.

00:27:30.200 You know what I mean? It was definitely at times when it was very cold and my feet were screaming

00:27:36.500 at me that I was saying, I'm not having fun. There was never the time that I said, I want to quit.

00:27:43.440 People might not believe me. It never, ever entered my head that I was going to quit.

00:27:47.400 I put in all of this work to prepare myself, to get myself there, to enter the race.

00:27:53.040 Why would I come here and quit after all I've worked, all I've sacrificed? Having that in the

00:27:58.540 back of my head is another way to stop whatever it is. If it's not running, if it's anything,

00:28:03.560 if you've put in the work and you truly believe in yourself, if you believe that you deserve to

00:28:08.700 cross that finish line, you're never going to get in your own head. You're never going to

00:28:12.480 be thinking about quitting because you, it's all, you front loaded the effort. It's all behind you.

00:28:17.620 It's tough for some people to think that I'm just not some freak. I'm really just your average dude.

00:28:23.820 I put in the work. It led me to believing in myself so much that I knew I was not going to quit.

00:28:31.080 Did you see the finish line before knowing that it was coming up? Is that how that played out? How

00:28:36.320 did that play out where you knew you were getting close if you weren't tracking it?

00:28:39.100 I was able to tell by aid station wise, like, all right, two aid stations left.

00:28:44.560 And, you know, I'd see my dad and he'd let me know, but I kind of wouldn't really listen to him

00:28:48.760 because I knew it possibly could get my head the mileage. But no, I never saw the finish line until

00:28:54.480 about a quarter mile out. And that was a sprint to the finish. What was that feeling like with you

00:28:59.900 and your dad when you crossed the finish line? It was like the goosebumps on my back exploded is how I

00:29:08.160 describe it to people. Yeah, man, that's cool. I can only imagine that. So how has this made you

00:29:13.800 a better human, a better man in general? Like, what are you doing to translate some of the skills

00:29:19.180 and the discipline and things you're learning through this sport into your everyday life?

00:29:24.300 It's really taught me that hard work is omnipotent. People hear it all the time. People,

00:29:29.380 ah, here's another rah, rah, hard work guy. I was nothing in high school. I was your average dude.

00:29:34.300 I was playing high school football. You know, all my high school friends are like,

00:29:38.400 dude, like you, Ryan Lang, like, how are you doing this? And they're not being rude saying that it's

00:29:43.240 just, it is the truth. I wasn't born with any special skills, special traits, special characteristics.

00:29:49.500 I just worked very hard and success in this race has showed me that if I put in the work,

00:29:57.400 what is there that I can't do? Because if you told me a year, a year and a half ago that I was going

00:30:02.440 to do this race, I'd laugh at you. I'd say, there's no way I can do that. There's no way

00:30:06.580 I'm capable of that. But all I did was put in the work. And here I am, I accomplished something that

00:30:13.100 was previously incomprehensible to me. So it's taught me that whatever it is, why not just go

00:30:19.780 work your butt off, go work your ass off and get yourself there. Cause that's all it takes. And you

00:30:24.720 know that. So putting that into school, into, you know, relationships with family members,

00:30:29.680 with anything you can apply, that's a business. You can apply it financially, personally,

00:30:32.940 anything. It's taught me that it really is true that I heard so much that hard work is

00:30:39.880 the King. And I just kind of didn't think much about it. Yeah. Yeah. And now here I am. I'm

00:30:45.000 the person preaching how important hard work is.

00:30:48.380 What did this progression actually look like? Cause I think what a lot of people will do is

00:30:51.880 they'll hear this and those guys who feel like they want to do something like what you're

00:30:55.720 doing. And they'll look back and discount the path that you took, because I think what

00:31:01.860 they'll think is that it's just a linear progression or exponential growth curve. And I imagine you had

00:31:07.920 some setbacks, some failures, some hardship during this time. What did some of those times actually

00:31:14.380 look like for you? Getting injured was a few of them. I did a hundred miles in July and I have no

00:31:21.760 idea how to be eating correctly. I was a zombie. I walked the last 20 to 25 miles in. And at the end

00:31:29.820 of my hundred miler, my dad and me sat down and I said, I can't see how I can get much better at this

00:31:35.980 because it was one of the worst pains I've ever gone through. My dad kind of wanted me to shut it

00:31:41.580 down. All right. You did a hundred miles. That's cool. My family members thought it was crazy. Your

00:31:46.360 knees are going to be gone. You know, this isn't healthy. You're wasting your time. You know,

00:31:51.060 I've heard that put your effort into the schoolwork more often, or I've heard, you know,

00:31:55.800 you have, you have all my high school and college friends like, yo, come party with us. That's

00:32:00.720 another big thing. That's, that was a big distraction throughout all this. And there's

00:32:04.780 a lot of people saying, why are you doing this? You know, what's the point of this? And that was

00:32:08.620 another distraction too. Whether I like to say, I don't care about what other people said. If your

00:32:13.300 brain is hearing that, why are you doing this? Someone kind of putting you down. That was really tough

00:32:17.460 too. And that's with anything that I know a ton of people listening to this are combating and

00:32:22.160 fighting that there's someone, it could be your mom. That's afraid for you to get hurt. It could be

00:32:26.980 your friend. That's jealous that you're doing something cool. They're going to bring you down

00:32:30.500 directly or indirectly. That was a huge thing that I had. There was people that viewed me as kids

00:32:35.660 crazy. He's just spending money to go out there and fail. He thinks he's a lot better than he is.

00:32:40.740 And that was a big thing was these external factors. I don't even know what to call them,

00:32:44.740 like the opposite of motivators. It was tough to grasp that. I had the conversation with my mom

00:32:50.140 and she's like, you know what? They're not there. They're not in your shoes. It's not their life,

00:32:54.140 not their journey. Let them be them. And if they're jealous, if they're afraid for you,

00:32:59.000 let it be. And that was the biggest obstacle I think that I had to go over throughout this entire

00:33:04.120 process over the past little over a year. It's just amazing that a lot of what we're talking about,

00:33:08.880 the things that have been setbacks and the things that have helped you triumph and overcome these

00:33:13.260 things are all mental. I mean, that's the underlying theme. It's all really a mental

00:33:18.560 game. Obviously, you've got to be physically in shape and capable of doing this, but I think

00:33:24.580 we discount ourselves because our mind gets in the way. Honestly, not just running, life in general

00:33:30.500 is a big, just mental fight. Do you want to be a professional at this? I mean, is this a viable

00:33:36.080 profession or what are you studying? How do you see this playing out in your life moving forward?

00:33:40.160 I don't think it's profession. I'm not doing these races for any sort of fame, for anything,

00:33:45.860 for any income. I'm doing these for myself to build this mental muscle that I always can refer

00:33:51.680 to, whether if it's, you know, I go on to try to pursue a life and being a life coach or something

00:33:56.620 like that. I've had a lot of thought into that recently. I'm studying real estate and economics here

00:34:01.520 at Drexel. And I think that there's a way that maybe I could translate this, this mental toughness

00:34:07.880 through running into mental toughness of building my own real estate investment trust or something

00:34:12.800 like that. Quite honestly, I'm unsure of that at this point, but all I know is I'm just going to

00:34:18.080 keep grinding at what I'm good at. And I'm having a lot of fun doing this and I'm still in college.

00:34:22.980 So I'm going to continue to have the fun with it and then, you know, see what life brings me towards

00:34:27.400 when I'm graduating, whether if it's continuing to do these runs, I'm still going to do these in some

00:34:32.420 sort of fashion, whether or not it's the same frequency when I'm older. You know, ultimately,

00:34:37.600 I view this as a way to better myself and be productive with the time that I have now,

00:34:43.340 which I think that anyone should be doing somehow, whether it's any side hustle, not even running,

00:34:48.960 not even working out anything to be productive. This is what I enjoy. This is what I build discipline

00:34:54.460 through. So I'm going to continue to do it until, you know, a new situation arises.

00:34:59.020 I really like this perspective because I think what a lot of people will think is that

00:35:02.940 some things are wasted, right? Like some experiences are wasted that you're just wasting

00:35:08.260 time or energy or resources. And I don't believe that's the case at all. If you're looking at it

00:35:12.540 from the right attitude, which is that of growth and learning and forward and advancement, there is

00:35:17.580 no wasted experience. And it sounds like you're taking that to the extreme, but I'm really curious,

00:35:22.660 like what's next? You've done the marathon, you've done the 50 miler, you've done the 100 miler,

00:35:26.440 you've done 240. Like, do you continue to push? Do you get better with your current races? Like,

00:35:31.640 how does this progression play out? I was running scared at Moab, running into something I've never

00:35:37.360 been into. So I'm going to do the Tahoe 200 in September. You know, I don't want it to be Ryan

00:35:43.880 Lang's going to run another 200 miles. It's, I want to be, wow, Ryan Lang's a competitor. Wow,

00:35:49.440 Ryan Lang's keeping up with some veterans. That's what I want it to be. I want to see progression

00:35:54.120 within myself. That's what has brought me happiness so far. And that's what I think is

00:35:59.040 continuing to bring me happiness is continuing to excel in this side hustle and this, this passion

00:36:04.320 that I have to take a step further. I've really been talking with my dad recently about going to

00:36:10.280 do the 6633 ultra marathon, which is 380 miles around the Arctic circle, actually a year from now,

00:36:19.120 next March. So we'll see. How long did you say? 380 miles? Yeah, 380 miles in the cold. So we'll see

00:36:26.880 if it works out. Doing a lot of investigating in it. There's people that have lost some fingers from

00:36:31.180 frostbite and such. So it's definitely a serious decision of weighing the pros and cons if I'm going

00:36:37.960 to be taking it too far, but you know, we'll see. Interesting. Yeah. How do you make that decision?

00:36:43.220 Like, how do you know when the, when the reward is potentially greater than the risk or vice versa?

00:36:49.540 With Moab sat with my grandparents, my parents, my brother and weighed the pros and cons.

00:36:55.960 What are the benefits? How can this hurt me? And with Moab, there were just way too many benefits

00:37:01.280 to the cons. So that's what we're going to have to do with this race. You know, is it really worth

00:37:07.500 my health? Okay. Maybe I go out there and I begin to see issues to where I would see permanent damage.

00:37:15.340 You know, we'll cut it off when we're out there. That might be the ultimate decision,

00:37:19.180 but this will be a little tougher because I think the pros and cons are going to come into the equal

00:37:23.400 balance area. That's how I have done it all my life. That's how I'm going to do it for this event.

00:37:28.600 We'll see. Do you think if you got into that situation, you could actually cut it off? I only ask

00:37:33.400 that because mentally, I mean, you're a strong kid. Like you've got this stuff under, under control.

00:37:38.400 It seems like, and you're probably pretty competitive. Otherwise you wouldn't be in this

00:37:42.180 situation and environment. Do you really feel like, Oh, there could be a point in time where I

00:37:46.100 would willingly call it quits? In my head. No, but that's why I bring my dad before Moab. He,

00:37:52.800 he said, you know, Chester, our old dog, he would play with the laser pointer with them until the dog

00:37:58.600 ripped its pads off its feet. So that's kind of how the mentality he brings with me to these kind

00:38:04.780 of races and whole make the call. Cause ultimately all my trust is within he's my pit crew master.

00:38:10.960 He's the guy in charge of everything. I will not quit. I can't live with myself with me picking the

00:38:17.520 quit Avenue. My dad would be the guy to make that call. And out there, it's like immediate,

00:38:23.380 like guys on snowmobiles come out and get you wherever you are. So it's not like someone can

00:38:28.860 die. You know, the people losing their fingers are people that have pushed too hard.

00:38:34.880 That's a pretty cool relationship that you have with your father. Has it always been like that?

00:38:39.180 We've recently found this with the races. He loves it. He loves being my NASCAR pit crew.

00:38:43.560 It's great. And I love being the car. So we've found this as a way to go on awesome adventures

00:38:48.400 together to places. We've never would picture going with each other and having great bonding

00:38:53.240 experience. I've got four kids, three boys and a daughter. And like, just to hear you talk about

00:38:58.660 your experiences and your closeness with your father is pretty cool. It's, it's actually really

00:39:03.700 cool to think about. A lot of the times I think what parents think is, well, I've, I've got these kids

00:39:08.240 while they're here under my house, you know, and I think there's obviously truth to that, but

00:39:11.920 it's cool to see it go well beyond you leaving the house and getting into your own life.

00:39:17.020 Family is one of my biggest priorities. It's the only people that fully understand you,

00:39:23.480 that fully enjoy being around you. So why not stick around as much as you can?

00:39:28.360 Yeah. Very cool. Well, Hey, as we wind things down today, I want to ask you a couple of additional

00:39:33.060 questions. The first one is what does it mean to be a man?

00:39:36.340 Being a man is having the ability to transcend pain and the willingness to embrace hardship.

00:39:43.440 Hmm. Succinct, powerful, man. I dig it. I like it. Well, cool. Ryan, how do we connect with you,

00:39:49.560 man? Follow your journey, learn a little bit more about what you're doing. And of course,

00:39:52.660 a lot of guys are going to be inspired by your story and what you're up to as well.

00:39:56.420 Yeah. I'm big on Instagram. I love being able to put a picture and put a caption and paint a picture

00:40:01.040 that way. And I also have a website, RyanFLang.com that I have a lot of content on, you know, my training,

00:40:08.400 more stuff like that, that you want to learn a little bit more about, you know, the running side

00:40:12.800 of me. Right on, man. We'll link all that up and let the guys connect with you. I'm so glad that we

00:40:18.120 worked this interview out. And I was a little disappointed at first that I was like, I don't

00:40:21.820 know. I'm so glad that we made the decision to do it because this is awesome. I know guys are going

00:40:27.440 to be inspired by this. One of the things that you said right off the bat was that you feel like

00:40:31.860 maybe you have a hard time with your age, being able to motivate and inspire people. And I've got to

00:40:36.120 tell you, man, your story and the way that you carry yourself and the mental toughness you possess.

00:40:40.700 I just don't, from my perspective, see that being a problem. I would say based on our limited

00:40:45.980 experience and interaction that that's in your head because the way you deliver a message and

00:40:50.480 the things that you do inspire me. And I know they're going to inspire a lot more people, man.

00:40:53.760 So I'm excited to put this out into the world. Thank you, dude. I really, it makes me feel really

00:40:59.400 good hearing that come from you. And I'm very happy also that we finally connected because I need more

00:41:04.600 people like you in my life. Right on, brother. All right, guys, there it is. As you can see,

00:41:11.180 powerful episode, powerful conversation and a powerful man. It's pretty incredible when you

00:41:15.800 have somebody who's 21 years old doing the amazing things that this guy is doing. I am blown away.

00:41:22.920 I'm inspired by what he's doing and it makes me want to push more outside of my comfort zone. So hit

00:41:27.740 Ryan up, let him know where you heard about him. Let him know that you found him on this show.

00:41:32.720 You can connect with him on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram. You can connect with me on Twitter,

00:41:37.500 Instagram, Facebook. Let us know if you've got an event, a physical event coming up.

00:41:41.000 Let us know what you're participating in. I'm always interested in what guys are doing.

00:41:45.020 I've got a couple of events. One in particular is the immersion camp with

00:41:48.500 Origin. I told you a little bit about earlier in the show. It's pretty exciting when you push

00:41:53.340 yourself outside of what you previously thought that you could do. So again, Ryan Lang,

00:41:57.480 hit him up on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, and let me know as well. Guys, I really appreciate you.

00:42:03.100 I'm glad that you're here. I admire you. You guys helped me be a better man. Somebody was asking me

00:42:08.880 the other day about what I've gained the most from in being part of this movement. And I'll tell you,

00:42:15.160 I set out to create something that we could band together as men, but I had no idea the type of man

00:42:22.940 I would become through this movement. And it's because you, it's because you're here. You're

00:42:27.620 pushing me. You're testing me. You're challenging me. You're holding me accountable to do the things

00:42:32.340 that I'm saying I'm going to do. And I want to thank you. I commend you for that. And I am truly,

00:42:38.300 truly thankful. So with that, I'm going to sign out for the day. Remember our legacy,

00:42:42.560 our father son event, order of man.com slash legacy. And then of course, remember our brotherhood.

00:42:46.840 If you're ready to step up in your life, try some new things, get surrounded by other men who are

00:42:52.300 doing big things. Head to order of man.com slash iron council, two great resources for you. And

00:42:57.760 of course, we'll have more in the future until next week, take action and become the man you are meant

00:43:03.440 to be. Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your life

00:43:10.080 and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.

Order of Man - June 05, 2018

Forging Mental Toughness ｜ Ryan Lange

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