Order of Man - Hearts of the Fathers to the Children, Hearts of the Children to Their Fathers ｜ FRIDAY FIELD NOTES

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.

00:00:06.020 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.

00:00:10.500 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong.

00:00:15.500 This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become.

00:00:19.760 At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.

00:00:24.700 Gentlemen, what is going on? What you're going to hear in a few minutes is a little different for your Friday field notes.

00:00:31.600 This is a presentation that I gave for young men and men at the Squire program.

00:00:38.020 We ran here on my property in Maine several months ago with my good friend, Beatrice Koulian and his team, including Ray Cash Care, who was guest on the podcast just a couple of weeks ago.

00:00:47.700 So this is a presentation that I think was valuable enough, at least I hope so, that will add value to your life.

00:00:54.420 Before we get into it, just a couple of things.

00:00:56.280 Number one, if you want to support what we're doing, one of the best things you can do is band with me on social media.

00:01:01.580 Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, YouTube.

00:01:04.880 Outside of YouTube, it's all at Ryan Mickler.

00:01:06.960 On YouTube, it's at Order of Man.

00:01:09.480 Social media is playing games with us.

00:01:11.360 I don't like that, obviously, clearly, but we got to play the game.

00:01:15.460 And in order to play the game, if we can have tens, if not hundreds of thousands of men connect with me, engage, share, comment, like, etc.

00:01:24.380 It's going to go a long way in not tricking the algorithm, but showing social media and other people what is important and the conversations that actually want to be had.

00:01:37.160 So make sure you do that.

00:01:37.940 Number two, if you are interested after this and you have a son or a nephew or stepson, etc., etc., between the ages of 8 to 15 and you're interested in a father-son event or rite of passage event, head to orderamand.com slash legacy.

00:01:53.820 Orderamand.com slash legacy.

00:01:55.380 We've got an event coming up, and we only have about a handful of spots right now for our legacy event here in Maine, which is held on September 22nd through the 25th.

00:02:07.000 Orderamand.com slash legacy.

00:02:08.800 Guys, for now, we'll get to this presentation.

00:02:12.680 All right, guys.

00:02:13.880 Well, good.

00:02:14.240 We're going to get started here.

00:02:15.680 I'm going to talk a little bit about how to forge the bonds between you and your son a little bit better.

00:02:19.580 So I want you guys to pay attention.

00:02:21.160 I had a big trash pile up here.

00:02:22.980 Hold on a second.

00:02:23.460 I had a big trash pile up here, and I was going to do a little lesson on that.

00:02:29.280 I only have three pieces.

00:02:30.420 This is some trash that I found lying around in here and outside, and I was going to say, man, I found all this trash, but actually then somebody picked it all up and threw it away, so they messed with me.

00:02:40.160 But are you guys picking up trash?

00:02:43.140 Pick up trash.

00:02:44.620 All right?

00:02:44.920 I know that might seem like a small and insignificant thing, but it's ridiculous that you'd be walking down the road or walking on the trail, and you see a piece of trash, and then you take another step.

00:02:57.340 That just seems ridiculous to me.

00:02:59.980 It seems little insignificant, but guys, it's really not.

00:03:04.220 Because what?

00:03:05.780 The way you do one thing is the way you do everything.

00:03:09.880 So if you're stepping over trash, like you see it, and you step over it, what does that say about you?

00:03:17.200 I'm not here to judge.

00:03:18.300 I want you guys to judge yourselves.

00:03:19.760 What does that say about you?

00:03:21.320 All right?

00:03:21.820 Keep your shit clean.

00:03:22.620 Keep it organized.

00:03:23.420 Keep it straight.

00:03:24.140 And that's going to naturally translate into other facets of your life.

00:03:27.080 So guys, I've got about 45 minutes.

00:03:28.760 I want to talk with you again about forging these tighter bonds between each of you.

00:03:33.440 I'm going to start by sharing a story, because when we started on our hike, our ruck, what did I have you guys do?

00:03:39.620 Young men, what did I have you guys do?

00:03:41.060 What were some of the exercises you did when we went on our ruck?

00:03:44.440 How about you?

00:03:45.360 Right up the hills?

00:03:46.520 Yep.

00:03:46.860 I'm talking about more of the prompts.

00:03:48.440 You're right.

00:03:48.920 You're not wrong.

00:03:49.680 But more of the prompts that I told you to be thinking about.

00:03:51.960 What were they?

00:03:52.440 Do you remember any of them?

00:03:53.480 Like why we're here.

00:03:54.620 Why we're here.

00:03:55.320 Why are you here?

00:03:56.600 To learn lessons with my dad.

00:03:58.580 Awesome.

00:03:59.160 Love it.

00:04:00.200 Any other young men?

00:04:01.240 Logan, how about you?

00:04:02.120 Do you remember anything that we talked about on that?

00:04:04.940 Things to reflect on with your dad.

00:04:06.660 Yeah.

00:04:06.940 Have you thought about some of those things?

00:04:08.380 Cool.

00:04:09.140 Hey, I'm going to challenge you guys, a couple of you, probably two or three of you, to come up here with your dad and actually do some of that.

00:04:16.440 So I know some of you, your heart's beating right now.

00:04:18.420 You're like, man, I don't want to do that.

00:04:20.560 I don't.

00:04:21.120 Think about that.

00:04:21.920 If your heart's telling you that, if your heart's beating like that, maybe that's a good indicator that you should.

00:04:27.060 Okay.

00:04:27.240 There's one other thing I told you guys that was very, very important.

00:04:29.760 I said that you guys need to have conversations amongst yourselves from the what?

00:04:34.420 Heart.

00:04:35.080 Right?

00:04:35.660 I think I said soul and I think I said heart, but they're interchangeable.

00:04:38.660 It's synonymous.

00:04:39.680 From the heart.

00:04:40.980 And the reason I want you to have those conversations is because you can have those conversations now.

00:04:47.500 There might come a, not there might, there will 100% certainty come a point in your life where you cannot have the conversations that you want to have.

00:04:56.520 Your dad's going to die.

00:04:58.400 You're going to die.

00:04:59.540 We talked about it.

00:05:00.200 We went down to the graveyard.

00:05:01.100 We had this conversation.

00:05:02.200 We're all going to die.

00:05:03.220 We don't know when.

00:05:04.260 I want to give you a little story about my dad and the experience that I had growing up because it's different than what you guys are experiencing now.

00:05:11.260 Um, my dad, when I was three years old, unfortunately chose drugs and alcohol.

00:05:18.640 He got into drugs and alcohol.

00:05:20.160 And my mother, bless her heart, decided that she didn't want to raise me and my sister with a man that was more interested in getting high and drunk than he was raising his kids. 0.94

00:05:29.400 So when I was three years old, my mom and dad went through a divorce.

00:05:32.900 I didn't really know him at the time.

00:05:34.460 And I'll say this.

00:05:35.160 I had a pretty good relationship, although strained, a pretty good relationship with my dad.

00:05:39.940 He was distant geographically.

00:05:42.640 He was distant emotionally, physically.

00:05:45.340 But I think he's, I think he was a pretty good man.

00:05:47.920 But I was really bitter.

00:05:49.440 I was really bitter as a kid.

00:05:51.760 About the time I was nine years old, my mom got remarried and she married a man who was an alcoholic.

00:05:57.760 Not really abusive, just not present.

00:06:01.660 Like not here, not engaged, didn't really seem like he cared all that much about us.

00:06:07.200 And that relationship eventually fizzled and they went through a divorce.

00:06:10.360 And then about the time I was 13 years old, she married another man.

00:06:13.620 This man was very, very successful financially.

00:06:17.100 He owned a private investigation firm in Southern California.

00:06:20.480 And I really thought highly of him.

00:06:22.240 He walked the walk.

00:06:23.280 He talked the talk.

00:06:24.820 I'll say it this way.

00:06:25.740 He talked the talk.

00:06:26.680 He didn't always walk the walk.

00:06:27.900 And I thought really highly of him.

00:06:30.300 But the problem with him is that he was verbally and emotionally abusive.

00:06:33.500 Never really directed at me.

00:06:34.940 He actually, he loved me.

00:06:36.640 He loved me.

00:06:37.300 He didn't have a son.

00:06:37.980 He loved me.

00:06:39.160 But he was verbally and emotionally abusive to my mother and my sister.

00:06:43.940 So bad that one time they got into an argument about who knows what.

00:06:48.060 And my mom grabs me.

00:06:50.040 I was 14 or 15 at the time.

00:06:53.340 Grabs me and my sister.

00:06:54.420 My sister is 11 or 12 at the time.

00:06:56.000 And she says, get in the car.

00:06:57.480 We're leaving.

00:06:58.820 No explanation.

00:06:59.840 Get in the car.

00:07:00.360 We're leaving.

00:07:01.180 So we get in the car.

00:07:02.460 She turns the Bronco over.

00:07:03.840 It doesn't start.

00:07:06.180 And I'm just thinking, well, that's, you know, I didn't really know.

00:07:09.040 I didn't know what was going on.

00:07:10.540 She gets out of the car.

00:07:11.980 She pops the hood of the car.

00:07:13.360 And she does something with the battery terminals.

00:07:15.420 And it starts right back up.

00:07:16.980 And at 14 years old, I'm like, that's weird.

00:07:20.400 She knew exactly what she had to do to get that started.

00:07:24.000 And she's not very mechanically inclined. 0.92

00:07:26.000 So at 14 years old, it led me to believe that maybe she's played this game before.

00:07:30.460 Well, my stepfather had tried to disable the vehicle so we couldn't leave.

00:07:34.680 We get in the car.

00:07:35.700 She starts it up.

00:07:36.940 She drives back.

00:07:37.980 I see my stepfather.

00:07:39.080 Big man.

00:07:39.640 6'2", 6'3". 0.72

00:07:40.600 He's probably 270, 280 pounds.

00:07:43.160 Big, intimidating guy.

00:07:44.820 Played for the Cowboys.

00:07:46.140 He comes running out of the house, down the little walkway, into the garage.

00:07:51.100 And he reaches over and he slams the garage door opener to close the garage.

00:07:56.260 My mom was so scared that she, as that thing came down, it came down about halfway, she backed

00:08:01.860 the Bronco up, peeled out, and ran through that garage.

00:08:06.140 Smashed the garage to shit.

00:08:07.360 She peels out, pulls forward. 0.99

00:08:11.500 He's chasing us down the road.

00:08:13.560 I'm in the passenger seat.

00:08:14.780 My sister's in the back.

00:08:15.780 My mom's driving.

00:08:16.780 And he goes like this.

00:08:18.440 Boom! 0.99

00:08:19.280 Right on that passenger window.

00:08:21.200 And I saw it on my side.

00:08:22.640 And I saw it dent.

00:08:23.440 And I did the only thing I knew I could do at that moment.

00:08:25.980 I tried to punch him.

00:08:27.640 So I hit the glass.

00:08:29.100 Boom! 0.99

00:08:29.640 I hit it once.

00:08:31.300 I went, boom!

00:08:32.100 I hit it again.

00:08:32.980 And it shattered.

00:08:34.420 Just completely shattered.

00:08:35.240 I still have the scars on my hand because that window shattered.

00:08:38.020 She peeled out.

00:08:39.080 He went looking for us.

00:08:40.040 He went and visited every hospital in southern Utah to try to find us.

00:08:43.380 I didn't go to the hospital.

00:08:44.340 It was fine.

00:08:44.880 It wasn't that big a deal.

00:08:46.100 Bleeding, but I didn't need any stitches.

00:08:48.720 This is the example that I had when I was growing up.

00:08:53.000 I didn't have a dad in my life to show me how to be a man.

00:08:57.300 I didn't have a dad to say, hey son, pack up your shit.

00:09:00.060 We're going to go to Maine and we're going to spend some time with you and me and other

00:09:03.580 boys and we're going to learn about each other and we're going to have a rite of passage

00:09:06.180 and I'm going to serve you and you're going to serve me.

00:09:08.160 Man, I didn't have that stuff.

00:09:11.620 So back to my father, my biological father.

00:09:15.000 We had a strained relationship.

00:09:17.200 I felt very let down.

00:09:21.240 I'll just say let down.

00:09:21.900 I felt let down.

00:09:23.960 I felt like I got the short end of the deal.

00:09:26.740 And I did.

00:09:27.780 I don't think any boy should have to go through that.

00:09:30.140 It's not something a young man should have to deal with.

00:09:32.000 Now we do and we make the best of it.

00:09:34.620 When my mom calls me, this was three years ago.

00:09:36.760 Gave myself a sliver.

00:09:38.960 Having PTSD flashbacks of that.

00:09:41.260 Make my hand bleed again by slamming on that pillar.

00:09:45.320 Three years ago, my mom calls me and she says, hey, your dad's in the hospital.

00:09:49.580 He had a heart attack.

00:09:50.420 And since I was so bitter and contentious, I was like, he'll be fine.

00:09:57.020 He'll be fine.

00:09:57.920 He had another heart attack years earlier.

00:10:00.080 He recovered.

00:10:01.040 No issues.

00:10:02.380 He'll be fine.

00:10:03.260 She calls me two days later.

00:10:04.480 Hey, your dad's not doing well.

00:10:05.880 His organs are starting to shut down and he's not responding to the surgery or treatment or

00:10:10.700 whatever he had going on.

00:10:11.920 You probably ought to think about coming down and visiting.

00:10:14.220 I said, nah, nah, he'll be fine.

00:10:16.820 He'll be fine.

00:10:17.960 She calls me about a day later.

00:10:19.220 She's like, hey, you really need to come down.

00:10:21.760 Your dad's probably going to die.

00:10:23.360 His organs from that heart attack had completely given out and they were giving up on him and

00:10:28.540 he was dying.

00:10:29.180 And it was just a matter of time.

00:10:31.580 So I take Eli's back there and Brecken's somewhere and I'm like, hey guys, hop in the

00:10:35.660 car.

00:10:36.080 We're driving.

00:10:36.760 I got to go say bye to my dad.

00:10:37.860 Well, I get about 30, or excuse me, yeah, 30 minutes outside of the hospital.

00:10:42.920 My mom calls me.

00:10:43.660 Hey, Ryan, where are you?

00:10:44.620 And I said, I'm about 30 minutes away.

00:10:46.520 I'm on my way.

00:10:47.800 She's like, okay, get here quick.

00:10:49.200 I get into the hospital.

00:10:50.400 I walk into the little, the door's open.

00:10:52.420 I walk in and she comes running out and she's like with tears in her eyes.

00:11:00.140 And she said, your dad died.

00:11:01.780 30 minutes ago.

00:11:09.420 Your dad died 30 minutes ago.

00:11:11.840 And I fucked it up.

00:11:16.740 Because I was bitter and I was angry and I was contentious and I put it off and I blew

00:11:22.420 it off.

00:11:23.080 And there's a lot of things that should have been said between him and I that I don't

00:11:27.140 have the opportunity to say now.

00:11:28.780 Now, maybe in another life, but not here, not now.

00:11:33.740 There's a lot of things I'd like to sit down with him and look him straight in the eye and

00:11:36.980 tell him.

00:11:38.460 There's a lot of things I'd like to say sorry about.

00:11:40.700 And you know what?

00:11:41.200 I think if he was here standing next to me, that he'd probably say the same thing.

00:11:46.700 He'd probably look me in the eye like I had you guys do earlier on our walk and say,

00:11:51.460 hey, I love you.

00:11:53.720 Hey, I'm sorry I was this way.

00:11:56.500 I would have done it differently if I had the opportunity.

00:12:00.120 Here's what I would do differently.

00:12:04.660 He messed up.

00:12:05.800 I messed up.

00:12:06.640 And now we have no opportunity except for in another life to be able to rectify the situation.

00:12:11.720 You guys better take advantage of this opportunity that you have here with your boy because you

00:12:16.220 never know when this shit's going to happen.

00:12:18.080 And it's painful and it's heart-wrenching.

00:12:20.840 I see some of you guys tearing up.

00:12:22.160 Paul, I see you tearing up.

00:12:23.280 That's fair.

00:12:25.060 It's fair.

00:12:26.460 I got emotional a second ago.

00:12:27.880 That's okay because it hurts, man.

00:12:30.940 But we can do something about it.

00:12:33.520 Right?

00:12:33.960 We can use that as fuel to be able to make better decisions moving forward.

00:12:37.800 And that's what we should be doing, making better decisions about the opportunities that

00:12:44.220 are afforded to us.

00:12:45.320 Men, young men, your dads are here with you.

00:12:49.660 Now, some of you might not have the best relationship.

00:12:52.540 I understand that.

00:12:54.580 It's hard, right?

00:12:56.500 You see him and he's doing some things great and he's doing some things that maybe you're

00:12:59.740 judging and you don't think he should.

00:13:01.080 You don't know maybe entirely, but there's some judgment there.

00:13:04.380 I get it.

00:13:05.040 There's some strain, but he's here.

00:13:06.520 He's here with you.

00:13:10.440 Dads, your boys may be losing their way.

00:13:13.460 Maybe they're talking back.

00:13:14.480 They're coming into their own.

00:13:15.400 They're trying to figure out what's going on, but they're here with you.

00:13:19.320 They're here.

00:13:21.740 Are you going to waste this time?

00:13:23.440 Are you going to waste this moment and this opportunity to look into your son's eyes and

00:13:27.820 really tell him how you feel?

00:13:29.200 Good, bad, and different, all this kind of stuff.

00:13:31.040 Because if you don't, you're wasting it.

00:13:33.220 And there's going to be a day when you get a phone call or you get pulled out of school,

00:13:38.960 young man, and somebody's going to say, I'm sorry, your dad was in a car accident.

00:13:42.560 And he's gone.

00:13:47.340 And then what?

00:13:49.220 I don't mean to be a downer, but I need to be very realistic about this because this is

00:13:52.820 something I went through.

00:13:54.220 So what I'm going to share with you over the next 30 minutes or so is some very key metrics

00:14:00.000 that you guys can use in your life to be able to incorporate and have a tighter bond between

00:14:08.720 you and your son.

00:14:10.100 Number one, and get out your notepads, guys.

00:14:12.740 And then you and your dads can talk about this on the drive home or the flight home or

00:14:15.920 whatever it may be.

00:14:21.080 Number one, I want you to write the word sanctity.

00:14:24.360 Sanctity, sanctity, can any young man here tell me in their own language what they think

00:14:30.820 that word means?

00:14:32.000 Sanctity, be bold, be brave.

00:14:35.280 Anybody?

00:14:36.980 Young men?

00:14:39.200 Fathers?

00:14:40.520 Jay?

00:14:41.480 Can you stand up and say it loud for these guys?

00:14:43.660 So when I hear that word sanctity, I think that's the bond between him and I.

00:14:46.780 It's between him and I, and we keep that between us.

00:14:49.960 Okay, it's a bond between you, it's a special bond between you, it keeps it between you

00:14:54.360 and you and Vincent.

00:14:56.020 Excellent.

00:14:56.600 What else?

00:14:57.080 Fathers, sons, whoever.

00:14:58.540 Stand up.

00:14:59.920 Sanctity.

00:15:00.720 I mean, surely you guys have thoughts about it.

00:15:02.740 What does it mean?

00:15:03.880 Lex?

00:15:04.440 It's the purity and pricelessness of the relationship between me and him.

00:15:08.340 Security and pricelessness?

00:15:09.880 Purity.

00:15:10.300 Purity.

00:15:10.820 Purity.

00:15:11.560 I love that.

00:15:12.460 It's a good answer.

00:15:13.240 I agree with both of you.

00:15:14.680 One more.

00:15:15.700 Fathers or sons?

00:15:16.680 Be bold.

00:15:17.740 Jonathan?

00:15:18.420 Special.

00:15:19.060 Special?

00:15:19.420 It's a relationship that only exists between a father and a son.

00:15:24.380 I love it.

00:15:25.620 It's a relationship.

00:15:26.680 Next time, stand up.

00:15:27.460 Sorry, I should have told you.

00:15:28.200 Next time, stand up.

00:15:29.020 It's a relationship, a special relationship between father and son.

00:15:32.380 That's exactly right.

00:15:33.580 So one thing you'll hear me say a lot, and I get a lot of pushback when I say this, is

00:15:37.800 Eli's over there and Breckin, I think, just stepped outside.

00:15:40.420 Those boys are not my friends.

00:15:44.640 They're not my friends.

00:15:46.020 We're not buddies.

00:15:47.180 We're not pals.

00:15:48.120 We're not chums.

00:15:49.420 We're not friends.

00:15:51.940 I'm their dad, and they are my sons.

00:15:55.580 I will never, ever step off the mantle of fatherhood to a lower tier of friendship.

00:16:02.300 Ever.

00:16:03.160 Now, let me throw this disclaimer.

00:16:05.460 We are friendly.

00:16:06.260 See, there are elements of friendship, like sacrifice and service and care and belief and

00:16:12.840 love, but I'm not their friend.

00:16:16.160 It's so much more meaningful than that.

00:16:18.400 Let me give you an example.

00:16:19.260 When my son Breckin was born, this was 14 years ago, roughly, myself and my wife, Miss Trish,

00:16:30.120 some of you guys have met.

00:16:31.220 If you haven't, you'll meet her tonight.

00:16:32.280 We're having a very difficult time in our marriage.

00:16:35.140 And part of the reason was, is because I didn't have anybody to show me how to be a man.

00:16:40.060 I had an alcoholic father.

00:16:41.940 I had a physically, excuse me, emotionally and verbally abusive.

00:16:45.160 I had an addictive father.

00:16:48.240 Like, this is what I had, so I didn't have any example.

00:16:50.920 So about a year into our marriage, we really struggled.

00:16:53.320 And one day, I came home, and we got into an argument, and I cannot remember what it was about.

00:16:58.840 And I looked her in the eye, as she said, I don't even want to be married to you anymore.

00:17:05.280 And I said, good, because I don't want to be married to you either.

00:17:08.900 And the next morning, she left.

00:17:11.360 And for the longest time, I blamed her.

00:17:14.720 How could she do this?

00:17:16.220 Why was she being disloyal?

00:17:18.460 Why was she doing the things that she was doing? 1.00

00:17:21.460 Why wasn't she doing what I thought a good wife should be doing? 1.00

00:17:23.840 And then one day, I came to a realization that maybe she did have some things that she needed to work on, but so did I.

00:17:30.180 And I began to take responsibility for my own decisions, which is ultimately what led to our separation.

00:17:37.040 There were nights where I would go into my son's room.

00:17:41.900 I'm going to get emotional again.

00:17:43.720 And there was pictures of him on the wall.

00:17:46.000 He was one year old at the time.

00:17:47.600 Pictures of him on the wall.

00:17:48.740 And I remember having a conversation with a picture and saying, son, I'm going to find a way to get you back in my life.

00:17:55.680 Long story short, I did.

00:18:01.900 Because I took responsibility for my actions and I changed my behaviors and she responded to that.

00:18:08.020 This year, we're going to have our 18th wedding anniversary this year.

00:18:11.180 We have four beautiful children.

00:18:12.960 But I'll tell you what, it was Brecken and the bond between us that transformed my life.

00:18:20.680 That's not friendship.

00:18:22.680 That's so much deeper than that.

00:18:24.900 It's so much more meaningful than that.

00:18:27.800 Guys, you have to realize that you're not friends, you're not buddies, you're not pals, you're not chums, you're not best friends or BFFs or any of this other bullshit.

00:18:36.500 That's your son.

00:18:39.780 Boys, that's your father.

00:18:41.860 That's special.

00:18:43.520 When I went through my separation with my wife, we were separated for about five months.

00:18:47.300 You know how many of my friends called me?

00:18:49.220 Zero.

00:18:49.620 Not a single one of them.

00:18:53.100 It was my son and the thought of him and wanting to be there in his life and realize that I was going down the same path that my dad did to me that brought us back together again.

00:19:05.020 That's powerful.

00:19:06.800 You guys get it yet?

00:19:08.520 Yes, sir.

00:19:09.000 So what I'd like to do, and then I'll talk about some other points, is I'd like to hear from three young men.

00:19:17.140 And I would like to invite you up here with your father.

00:19:21.240 And I would like, if you feel comfortable, to share something that maybe you shared out in the field or maybe something that you haven't.

00:19:29.300 Now, here's what I don't want it to be.

00:19:31.460 This is not an opportunity to throw your father under the bus right here.

00:19:34.440 You guys deal with that shit somewhere else, not here.

00:19:38.640 What I'd like you to do is I'd like you to come up and say one of two things.

00:19:42.820 What you appreciate about him, what you respect about him, and or what he means to you.

00:19:54.040 Now, one of the prompts I gave you out there is you can tell your dad what he needs to work on.

00:19:59.360 Please don't do that here.

00:20:00.780 That's between you and your father.

00:20:02.580 You guys understand what I'm saying?

00:20:03.800 Don't throw your father under the bus right here.

00:20:05.780 You guys work that out.

00:20:07.280 You come up here and you pay homage and compliment to your father.

00:20:10.720 Who would like to do that? 0.73

00:20:12.840 Young men, be bold.

00:20:14.300 This is an opportunity to express some love.

00:20:17.680 It takes some courage.

00:20:19.840 You got to be a little vulnerable.

00:20:21.200 But it's also leadership.

00:20:23.520 Because you're going to show other young men the way.

00:20:25.480 Who would like to do that? 0.73

00:20:28.580 Come on up, buddy.

00:20:30.700 John, you come up too.

00:20:33.800 Ronan, when you come up here, I want you to be bold and I want you to be assertive.

00:20:37.020 Because you're not just talking with your dad, but everybody else needs to hear you too, okay?

00:20:40.380 Yes, sir.

00:20:41.120 Look your dad in the eye, face to face, and tell him what you need to tell him.

00:20:44.580 I'm grateful to have you as my father figure.

00:20:46.860 And I'm grateful that you put in the time and money to get me here and many other places in the world.

00:20:52.400 But with sports, education, I wouldn't prefer anything else to have as a father figure.

00:20:58.940 Thank you.

00:21:01.120 Thank you.

00:21:02.240 Thank you.

00:21:03.600 Good job, boys.

00:21:09.980 Thank you, man.

00:21:10.620 Good job, Ronan.

00:21:11.320 Thank you for going first.

00:21:12.300 That's the hardest part.

00:21:13.660 That's what leaders do, though, by the way.

00:21:15.240 Who else?

00:21:15.660 Two more.

00:21:16.700 Two more young men.

00:21:19.440 I don't have to finish my talk.

00:21:20.960 I can just sit here and be quiet.

00:21:23.140 Did you raise your hand?

00:21:24.920 Bring your dad up here.

00:21:26.520 Be bold.

00:21:27.100 Look him in the eye.

00:21:28.480 Speak loudly and boldly.

00:21:29.580 All right, Brayden?

00:21:30.260 I appreciate you for helping me through the rough times and being patient with me when

00:21:35.440 I was needed and helping me with my education and raising me up to my up-being right now.

00:21:41.740 I love you so much.

00:21:45.560 Good job, man.

00:21:50.560 Thank you, Brayden.

00:21:51.460 Appreciate you.

00:21:52.260 Takes courage.

00:21:53.220 One more.

00:21:55.100 Now's the time, guys.

00:21:55.980 I started that story.

00:21:58.020 I didn't know my dad was going to die.

00:22:00.340 I'm not trying to hold that over your head.

00:22:01.520 I'm just saying that there's moments in time that you can make special and meaningful and

00:22:04.960 significant.

00:22:05.480 This might be one of them.

00:22:06.880 How about a father?

00:22:08.200 Is there a father who'd like to step up and tell their son?

00:22:10.500 Josh?

00:22:11.000 Hey, Bob.

00:22:11.440 I just want to tell you how much I love you.

00:22:13.300 And I appreciate that you made the choice to come here with me.

00:22:16.660 And that we're just crushing.

00:22:17.960 And that we're making it happen.

00:22:19.080 And I appreciate your hard work, your effort, even in light of some of the things that you

00:22:24.560 don't like.

00:22:25.320 And I love you.

00:22:25.880 Thank you, Josh.

00:22:33.520 All right, guys.

00:22:34.400 Let's get into some other facets of this.

00:22:36.560 Next one, I want you to write down.

00:22:37.900 So we have what?

00:22:38.460 What's the first one?

00:22:39.980 Sanctity.

00:22:40.440 What's the next one?

00:22:41.380 Service.

00:22:43.300 Service.

00:22:45.800 Mason, can you read what it says?

00:22:48.040 Stand up and read these three words, right?

00:22:50.600 Stand up.

00:22:51.060 Come up here.

00:22:51.480 And then you can write that down.

00:22:54.580 Turn around.

00:22:55.320 Face these guys.

00:22:55.980 Look, when we're addressing people, we're going to come up here.

00:22:57.880 We're going to stand up front.

00:22:58.960 You're going to say it nice and loud.

00:23:00.100 And you're going to read these three words right there.

00:23:02.660 Can you read those for me?

00:23:03.580 Nice and loud.

00:23:04.660 Protect, provide, preside.

00:23:06.920 Say it one more time.

00:23:08.220 Protect, provide, preside.

00:23:10.180 Thank you, Mason.

00:23:10.920 Appreciate it.

00:23:11.320 Go sit down.

00:23:12.740 Protect, provide, preside.

00:23:15.280 Protect, we know what that means, right?

00:23:17.120 We protect ourselves.

00:23:18.240 We make ourselves capable.

00:23:19.740 We protect our loved ones.

00:23:21.740 Instructor Ray talked about it earlier.

00:23:23.360 If somebody's coming at my boy, I'm stepping between and I'm putting myself there.

00:23:26.960 I'm going to protect.

00:23:27.900 We protect those people who are less fortunate because there are people who can't do it for

00:23:31.580 themselves.

00:23:32.300 If we can, then we have a responsibility to do that.

00:23:34.900 Protect, provide.

00:23:36.260 What does that mean?

00:23:37.260 What do you think?

00:23:37.880 Provide.

00:23:38.840 Like support them in their decisions and stuff like that.

00:23:42.100 Support them.

00:23:43.220 Awesome.

00:23:43.860 Great.

00:23:44.540 Parker, how about you?

00:23:46.320 Provide.

00:23:46.820 Stand up.

00:23:47.360 Turn around.

00:23:47.820 Face the guys.

00:23:48.380 Um, just helping people through their struggles, I think, in part of sport.

00:23:54.160 Perfect.

00:23:54.740 Excellent.

00:23:56.240 Also, how many of your dads make money and put food on the table?

00:24:00.720 Right?

00:24:01.540 That's an element of providing.

00:24:03.280 And the third component is to preside.

00:24:05.420 Does any young man know here what preside means?

00:24:07.820 What does that word mean?

00:24:09.020 Preside.

00:24:10.120 Young men, be bold, guys.

00:24:12.760 Logan, do you know what that word means?

00:24:14.540 It's okay if you don't.

00:24:15.160 That's all right.

00:24:16.180 You're being honest.

00:24:16.980 That's okay.

00:24:17.380 That's why we're here.

00:24:17.980 We're learning.

00:24:18.820 Anybody else?

00:24:19.980 Isaac, how about you?

00:24:20.920 You know what preside means?

00:24:22.740 Two Isaacs.

00:24:23.520 You don't?

00:24:24.020 Okay.

00:24:24.200 That's okay.

00:24:24.920 Isaac?

00:24:25.480 Like to watch over?

00:24:26.620 Pretty much.

00:24:27.360 Yeah.

00:24:28.140 Preside is synonymous with leadership.

00:24:30.040 To lead.

00:24:30.940 You guys are called to lead.

00:24:33.300 Even down to your voices.

00:24:34.640 Think about that for a second.

00:24:35.680 Your vocal cords.

00:24:36.720 The reason your voice is as deep as it is, is because you're meant to use it.

00:24:43.140 And you're meant for it to project.

00:24:44.980 And you're meant to teach other people.

00:24:47.600 Just your voice alone.

00:24:49.460 Let alone all that testosterone that's coursing through your veins.

00:24:52.320 Thank you, Isaac.

00:24:54.540 What do all three of those have in common?

00:24:56.900 Protect, provide, preside.

00:24:59.960 What do you guys think?

00:25:01.820 One word I just gave it to you.

00:25:03.120 You should have wrote it down a second ago.

00:25:04.260 Service.

00:25:05.000 Service.

00:25:06.260 We are to serve.

00:25:09.700 We are to look at what other people are doing.

00:25:11.840 We are to look at what their needs are.

00:25:13.180 The people we care about.

00:25:14.100 The people we love.

00:25:15.060 The people who can't do it for themselves.

00:25:16.620 And we're to take our strengths.

00:25:18.300 Our capabilities.

00:25:19.540 Our skill sets.

00:25:20.620 And put them to use in order to serve other people.

00:25:24.060 What do you think Instructor Steve's doing here?

00:25:25.780 You think he needs to be here with you guys?

00:25:28.120 He doesn't need to be here with you guys.

00:25:29.520 He's got businesses.

00:25:30.480 He's got all kinds of success.

00:25:31.940 He doesn't need to be here.

00:25:33.440 Instructor Bedros doesn't need to be here.

00:25:35.040 Instructor Ray doesn't need to be here.

00:25:36.640 I don't need to be here.

00:25:37.400 I kind of actually like to be in with my wife and kids.

00:25:41.580 But I'm here.

00:25:42.840 Because I care about you.

00:25:44.320 And I have a skill set that I think will serve you.

00:25:47.500 And so I'm going to utilize it.

00:25:49.900 The third component, and it ties in very closely, is sacrifice.

00:25:56.180 Sacrifice.

00:25:56.540 When I'm out here with you, I'm sacrificing because I could be in there with them.

00:26:05.180 When all of the cadre here are here, they flew from California to here to sacrifice.

00:26:12.260 They could be making money.

00:26:13.720 They could be spending time with their families.

00:26:15.620 They could be enjoying their hobbies and their activities.

00:26:17.840 And yet they're here.

00:26:18.720 Why?

00:26:20.140 Why?

00:26:20.760 That's not rhetorical.

00:26:21.720 Why do you think they're here?

00:26:23.640 What do you think?

00:26:25.220 Speak.

00:26:25.780 Stand up.

00:26:26.220 Speak up.

00:26:26.900 That's right.

00:26:27.440 Because they'd like to help us.

00:26:28.920 Like the young men coming up. 0.87

00:26:31.540 That's right.

00:26:32.460 They care about you.

00:26:34.200 They care about you.

00:26:35.320 Go ahead and sit down, Jane.

00:26:36.060 Thanks.

00:26:37.220 Sacrifice means love.

00:26:39.400 All right.

00:26:39.660 If you love something, don't you sacrifice for it?

00:26:43.500 Michael, what do you love?

00:26:44.700 Not besides your son.

00:26:45.620 We know that.

00:26:46.040 But what activities, what hobbies, what interests, what do you love?

00:26:51.960 Providing for my family.

00:26:53.220 Providing for your family.

00:26:54.140 Doing your work.

00:26:55.100 Do you always want to be at work?

00:26:56.960 No.

00:26:57.840 So why do you do it?

00:26:59.240 Provide.

00:26:59.780 That's what's required.

00:27:01.520 So we have to sacrifice what we might.

00:27:04.280 You can sit down, Michael.

00:27:04.980 Thank you.

00:27:05.580 We have to sacrifice what we might want right now in order to serve the people that we love

00:27:11.900 and we care about.

00:27:12.600 When you sacrifice, it means you care.

00:27:16.560 It means you love.

00:27:17.080 But here's an interesting thing about sacrifice.

00:27:19.420 It's a bit of a misnomer.

00:27:21.260 Because if you think about what sacrifice is, it's like giving something up, right?

00:27:24.960 Like I'm going to be here and so I'm going to sacrifice time to be here.

00:27:29.920 You guys get that?

00:27:31.140 That's what I have to pay.

00:27:32.760 Everything has a cost.

00:27:33.940 But it's a misnomer because what I get in return is so much greater than the sacrifice

00:27:40.420 I make to be here.

00:27:41.600 And what do I get in return?

00:27:43.340 I feel good.

00:27:45.640 I feel valued.

00:27:48.380 I feel pride and satisfaction by being here with you.

00:27:53.400 So when we sacrifice, we're giving up something right now and what we're going to get in return

00:28:00.280 as long as it's a righteous sacrifice, because we can make bad sacrifices too, right?

00:28:05.960 If we're making righteous sacrifices, what we get in return is so much greater than what

00:28:11.600 we gave.

00:28:12.460 And so sacrifice is not giving something up.

00:28:15.180 It's actually an investment in the things that we care about.

00:28:18.780 Because when I see my sons thrive, I'm like, hell yeah, I gave up all that time and that

00:28:25.020 energy and that money that I could have been making.

00:28:28.300 There's been times where I've throttled back in my business where I haven't done what I

00:28:31.840 would like to do because I know the cost comes at the expense of spending time with my family.

00:28:37.340 And so I'm like, man, I could have made an extra 10 grand and I've turned down speaking

00:28:40.880 engagements and other opportunities that are five and six figures.

00:28:43.580 And I've said no, and that sacrifice paid off because even if I just get to see my kids

00:28:50.360 grow or develop or get a little bit better, that was worth it to me.

00:28:55.060 That's an investment in them.

00:28:56.940 You guys understand?

00:28:58.200 So I want you to be thinking about what am I willing to sacrifice?

00:29:01.960 Vincent, I know you guys have football.

00:29:03.340 We were talking a little bit about your, you have to sacrifice.

00:29:06.140 We're talking about camps that are coming up, right?

00:29:08.560 So you're, you're probably not going to work as much as you could.

00:29:11.460 Maybe your girlfriend, you have a girlfriend? 0.78

00:29:12.740 Okay.

00:29:13.820 If you did, maybe you don't because you've sacrificed that because you realize this is

00:29:17.420 more important, right?

00:29:18.600 We give those things up because we realize that this is where I want to go.

00:29:22.880 And you need to know that everything young men has a cost. 0.89

00:29:26.080 Like you don't get to make a decision without you giving something up.

00:29:30.120 Some of you young men think that you can just make decisions and have your cake and eat it

00:29:33.700 too.

00:29:33.940 You've heard that term.

00:29:34.900 You don't get to do that.

00:29:37.740 Even the best decisions you can make are going to cost you something and you have to be realistic

00:29:42.420 about that.

00:29:43.760 The fourth component that I want to get to today, you guys, the last S is solidarity.

00:29:51.680 Solidarity.

00:29:53.040 What do you guys think that means?

00:29:55.520 Young men, anybody want to guess?

00:29:57.140 Parker, you have an idea of what solidarity might mean?

00:29:59.180 Um, just being like, I guess, trusting in yourself and like being solid in your decision making.

00:30:09.600 It could.

00:30:10.120 It could.

00:30:10.620 It's a little different than that.

00:30:11.800 Anybody else have a thought?

00:30:12.800 Thank you for standing up.

00:30:14.020 Still takes courage.

00:30:15.100 Anybody else?

00:30:16.300 Let me tell you guys, it's a bond.

00:30:18.900 It's cohesive.

00:30:19.700 It's one in the same.

00:30:20.620 You guys are solid.

00:30:21.800 You're standing in solidarity, meaning you're on the same battlefield.

00:30:25.440 Look at you guys.

00:30:26.320 Like some of you guys are clones of your dad.

00:30:29.780 You see that?

00:30:30.620 Like you look at him, you're like, or your dad, I know this.

00:30:32.680 Your dad looks at you and he's like, man, that's me 30, 40 years ago.

00:30:38.240 When I grew up, the name Mickler didn't mean a thing.

00:30:43.000 Excuse me.

00:30:43.700 Nothing.

00:30:45.160 It was just, it was just sounds.

00:30:47.240 It was just noises.

00:30:49.000 Isn't that all words are?

00:30:50.840 We've just learned to use our, the air in our lungs, coursing through our vocal cords,

00:30:56.260 manipulating our mouths and our tongues to manipulate the sounds we make.

00:31:00.380 And that's what words are.

00:31:01.840 Mickler meant nothing as I grew up.

00:31:05.320 You know what it means now?

00:31:06.360 Everything.

00:31:07.100 Because I made it so.

00:31:09.440 I'm the one that gave it definition.

00:31:12.220 I decided that this is what it's going to mean.

00:31:15.320 And then when I talk with my sons and they get sick of hearing it, I say this all the

00:31:20.440 time, Micklers do blank.

00:31:23.760 So when they're complaining and bitching and moaning about the things they don't want to 1.00

00:31:26.900 do, I say, Micklers do hard things.

00:31:29.300 That's a rule.

00:31:30.480 We stand in solidarity with that.

00:31:33.320 There's no question about it.

00:31:35.340 When they don't want to eat some new vegetable or something at dinner, I say, Micklers try new 0.99

00:31:39.920 things.

00:31:40.460 That's a rule.

00:31:42.280 There's no question about it.

00:31:43.640 We are in solidarity with those things.

00:31:47.060 So I'm going to challenge you guys, and I don't think we're going to have a lot of time

00:31:49.860 this weekend, but one thing I'm going to challenge you guys to do is to come up with a code of

00:31:54.760 conduct for the way you and your father stand in solidarity, the way that you act, the way

00:32:00.740 you behave, the way Micklers show up, the way you guys show up, Robinson's, for example,

00:32:04.980 show up.

00:32:05.480 This is what we do.

00:32:07.280 And then when you dads are dead and gone, you can know that your sons are going to carry

00:32:11.360 that on.

00:32:11.800 And you sons, you have a moral obligation to carry on the positive legacy of your father.

00:32:16.860 If it was a negative legacy, you have the moral obligation to change it, to make your

00:32:21.960 name mean something.

00:32:24.160 But if it's good and it's positive and it's true, you have an obligation to ensure that

00:32:30.020 what your dad taught to you, you now teach to your children.

00:32:33.700 That's solidarity.

00:32:35.280 Mickler stands for something because we made it stand for something.

00:32:39.480 We decided what it stood for.

00:32:42.040 What do you guys decide your name is going to stand for?

00:32:45.840 Words are important.

00:32:47.500 Words are powerful.

00:32:49.140 But you get to define what they mean.

00:32:51.400 You get to define the meaning you give them.

00:32:53.300 Brecken, can you come up here real quick?

00:32:54.640 One exercise that we did years ago is we wrote a code of conduct.

00:33:01.740 And this code of conduct is in my office.

00:33:03.720 It's hanging up.

00:33:04.500 Grab that, Brecken, please.

00:33:05.860 It's hanging up in my office.

00:33:08.320 And we spent some time, me and Brecken.

00:33:10.560 Actually, Eli, you come up here too, bud.

00:33:12.420 Me and Brecken and Eli wrote this code of conduct together.

00:33:16.120 We spent some time thinking about the way that we were going to show up.

00:33:19.460 This is standing in solidarity.

00:33:20.760 We wrote this together and we all signed it.

00:33:23.580 This wood frame it's in came from an old barn near the place that we did this exercise.

00:33:30.540 Because we wanted it to mean something that's important to us.

00:33:33.240 So this is our code of conduct.

00:33:34.880 Now, admittedly, I will tell you this because I'm flawed just as much as anybody else.

00:33:38.480 We have not read this in a very long time.

00:33:41.180 Right?

00:33:41.860 When I pulled it down, you're like, man, I haven't read this in a long time.

00:33:44.520 That's my fault.

00:33:46.100 I need to do a better job at this.

00:33:47.760 Yes, we did the exercise, but frankly, we haven't followed through.

00:33:51.300 And this is something that we need to do better.

00:33:53.000 So we all know exactly where we stand and what Michler stands for.

00:33:57.660 So Brecken, I want you to read this really loud.

00:33:59.780 You guys can steal what I say.

00:34:01.460 You can manipulate what we said.

00:34:03.360 You can tweak it.

00:34:04.260 You can use it as fodder for your own code of conduct.

00:34:06.980 But you need to come up with a family code of conduct about the way you and your son perform.

00:34:13.280 And dads, this is not about what you want from your son.

00:34:15.620 This is a partner exercise because your son has some pretty good ideas.

00:34:20.220 I can promise you.

00:34:21.440 I've talked with you a lot, a lot of you young men, and I can assure you, if you don't know

00:34:25.140 dads, your sons are intelligent.

00:34:27.340 They're bright.

00:34:28.140 They're thoughtful.

00:34:28.980 They're caring.

00:34:29.960 Give them an opportunity to be involved in the process of what your names mean.

00:34:35.380 Brecken, will you read this nice and loud so people can hear it?

00:34:37.960 Michler code of conduct.

00:34:39.800 We will be disciplined in whatever we pursue because discipline equals freedom.

00:34:43.980 When faced with difficult decisions and choices, we will always act with courage and bravery.

00:34:50.040 We know it is our responsibility to protect, provide, and preside.

00:34:54.680 And we act accordingly.

00:34:57.520 We understand if we are to achieve our goals, we must work our hardest.

00:35:02.200 We do our very best to keep ourselves physically, mentally, and spiritually strong.

00:35:06.260 We take responsibilities for our thoughts, choices, and actions, and learn from our mistakes.

00:35:13.280 We respect ourselves, our surroundings, and others.

00:35:16.620 We believe in being honest and truthful in every way, even if it's hard.

00:35:21.180 We think with our minds, fill with our hearts, and follow our souls.

00:35:25.700 Awesome.

00:35:30.700 So, what I'd like, I'm going to leave this up here, you guys.

00:35:33.720 I'll just, I'll leave it right here.

00:35:35.320 You guys can come up afterwards, after Bedros is done talking.

00:35:39.840 You can, you can look at it, get some ideas.

00:35:41.900 You can take a picture of it, and maybe that'll give you some thoughts.

00:35:45.400 But, but solidarity.

00:35:46.840 Like, this is, like, here, come here.

00:35:48.860 Look at this.

00:35:49.300 Like, we are a unit.

00:35:51.660 We are not independent of each other.

00:35:54.060 We don't operate independently of each other.

00:35:56.360 We stand together around a common code, and then we act accordingly.

00:36:01.580 This is what this means.

00:36:02.900 And when any of us get out of line, Brecken gets out of line, Eli gets, guess what?

00:36:07.520 I get out of line too.

00:36:09.200 And they have permission to hold me accountable to this,

00:36:12.540 because this is the way that Micklers show up.

00:36:16.600 You understand?

00:36:17.660 All right, boys, go sit down.

00:36:18.660 Thank you, guys.

00:36:19.420 Appreciate it.

00:36:21.360 Guys, look, we got a lot of problems in society, right?

00:36:24.540 Boys, what are some of the problems you think we have in society?

00:36:27.200 Just rattle them off.

00:36:28.280 What do you think?

00:36:29.080 Changing their gender. 0.88

00:36:30.220 Yeah.

00:36:30.740 So we have a lot of confusion around what's a boy, what's a girl, what's a man, what's a woman.

00:36:34.700 That's a problem.

00:36:35.600 Thank you.

00:36:36.220 What else?

00:36:37.560 Problem.

00:36:37.860 What are you guys dealing with?

00:36:39.600 Parker, how about you?

00:36:41.020 Well, I'm not dealing with it, but I think a big problem is addiction.

00:36:44.180 Addiction.

00:36:45.060 We need substance.

00:36:46.880 Drugs.

00:36:47.720 Alcohol.

00:36:48.880 Pornography.

00:36:49.960 Right?

00:36:50.360 What else?

00:36:52.100 A lot of weak leadership.

00:36:53.760 Some of the things I see.

00:36:54.940 There's a lot of problems.

00:36:55.820 You fathers should be talking with your boys about this.

00:36:57.960 Don't let...

00:36:58.740 Look.

00:36:59.500 Some of you bury your heads in the sand, because you're like, if I just ignore it, it'll go away.

00:37:03.360 Don't.

00:37:04.280 And don't think your boys are incapable of dealing with it.

00:37:06.900 If they are, that's your fault too.

00:37:10.120 Make sure you give them the information they need to thrive.

00:37:13.620 What do you got for us?

00:37:14.780 Social media.

00:37:15.920 So, yeah.

00:37:16.820 How so?

00:37:17.320 People like follow other people around, you know, like messes up their like point of view

00:37:21.940 on things.

00:37:22.500 Yeah.

00:37:22.880 You get, you get some weird thoughts that aren't really going to serve you as well as they

00:37:26.160 could.

00:37:26.540 Good point.

00:37:27.640 Guys, a lot of these problems, in fact, I would say all of these problems are going to

00:37:31.520 be solved between this bond, this bond, this bond, this bond.

00:37:37.360 If you guys incorporate this stuff into your life, sanctity, service, sacrifice, solidarity,

00:37:44.720 those problems start to dissipate.

00:37:46.460 And if they don't outside of this bond, you guys can cohesively, as a unit, start to work

00:37:51.960 towards solving the problems that you see in society.

00:37:55.300 What did I say?

00:37:56.340 Protect, provide, preside.

00:37:58.860 Guys, it's a challenge.

00:37:59.960 It's a struggle.

00:38:01.340 I know you young men are dealing with a lot of bullshit.

00:38:03.660 I did too.

00:38:04.340 Probably not to the degree that you guys are because it's coming at you a lot faster than

00:38:07.480 it did for us men.

00:38:08.640 I promise you that.

00:38:10.020 But your dads are here to serve you.

00:38:12.020 They won't always be.

00:38:13.300 I hate to say that, but they won't always be.

00:38:16.360 So you fathers, take advantage of it now.

00:38:18.460 You sons, take advantage of it now.

00:38:20.540 Stand in solidarity.

00:38:23.040 Remember the sanctity of the relationship that you guys have, service and sacrifice, and you

00:38:28.320 guys will be leaps and bounds ahead of everybody else.

00:38:30.200 And most importantly, you'll be able to serve society in the way it needs to be served.

00:38:34.740 People need us.

00:38:36.100 They need us.

00:38:36.720 These 40 guys in here, they need us.

00:38:38.760 I promise you.

00:38:40.200 I promise you.

00:38:41.120 I've had you guys come up.

00:38:42.300 Many of you come up.

00:38:43.340 And I've had other people.

00:38:44.560 People that have literally transformed their lives.

00:38:46.960 People who have put a gun to their head and decided not to pull the trigger because they

00:38:51.420 heard something that I said on a podcast.

00:38:53.480 I don't say that to brag.

00:38:56.220 I say that about the weight of the responsibility that we have to show up in a meaningful way.

00:39:01.480 And they heard something I said on a podcast and they took the gun off of their head and

00:39:05.880 they set it down and they said, I'm going to start doing better.

00:39:09.260 You think you don't have influence?

00:39:10.920 Trust me.

00:39:11.320 You have influence.

00:39:12.760 Every single one of you does.

00:39:14.040 And now you have to make a decision what to do with it.

00:39:17.460 I really appreciate you guys being here.

00:39:20.060 Love the fact that we have the Squire program and crew, Instructor Steve, Instructor Ray,

00:39:24.720 Bedros, and the rest of the team, the media, and everybody else.

00:39:27.480 We've got a lot to do, guys.

00:39:29.740 A lot to do.

00:39:31.160 Realize the weight of it.

00:39:32.160 Step into it.

00:39:32.960 And we'll all be better off.

00:39:34.180 Okay?

00:39:34.780 I'll be here.

00:39:35.440 Appreciate you guys.

00:39:36.280 Thanks a lot.

00:39:38.260 All right, guys.

00:39:38.920 I hope you enjoyed that presentation.

00:39:40.760 I really spoke from the heart on that one.

00:39:42.580 Obviously, it was a very emotionally charged topic, discussion.

00:39:48.140 I shared some personal insight that maybe a lot of you have not yet heard before.

00:39:52.440 And it was important for me to share that with the fathers who attended this event and

00:39:56.300 also the sons because we need to learn.

00:40:00.660 Men, sons, we need to learn what it takes to be a man, why it's important that men turn 0.81

00:40:06.380 around and help their sons, why sons need to look at their fathers regarding how to become

00:40:12.580 a man and how to be a productive member of society.

00:40:15.120 So I really, really hope that it served you.

00:40:17.620 If you're not a father yet, or even if you are and you think this could help somebody else,

00:40:21.940 do me a solid and just share this.

00:40:24.400 Text somebody the link.

00:40:25.820 Take a screenshot.

00:40:26.940 Post it up on Instagram.

00:40:28.120 Post it up on Twitter.

00:40:29.180 Post it on Facebook.

00:40:30.860 If you're watching this on YouTube, leave a comment.

00:40:34.160 Share it with somebody.

00:40:35.420 You guys know what to do.

00:40:36.440 And if you're a father who has a son between the ages of eight to 15, or, you know, of

00:40:41.180 a father, maybe you're a woman, a mother who's listening, or you've got a brother or

00:40:47.340 a cousin or somebody who has a son within this age range.

00:40:51.040 And you think it could really serve those men.

00:40:53.360 Tell them to go to order of man.com slash legacy order of man.com slash legacy and get

00:40:59.520 registered for our event.

00:41:01.520 That's going to be held on September 22nd through 25th, 2022.

00:41:07.260 All right, guys, you got your marching orders, share, promote, encourage, foster number one,

00:41:13.800 just go out there and live like men. 0.94

00:41:15.560 And then also consider joining us at our legacy event, order of man.com slash legacy.

00:41:21.320 All right, you guys, we'll be back next week until then go out there, take action and become

00:41:25.640 the man you are meant to be.

00:41:27.120 Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast.

00:41:30.120 You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be.

00:41:34.140 We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.

Order of Man - July 08, 2022

Hearts of the Fathers to the Children, Hearts of the Children to Their Fathers ｜ FRIDAY FIELD NOTES

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