Order of Man - How Improved Style Improves Your Life ｜ AARON MARINO

00:00:00.000 I know as I release this podcast, there's going to be a lot of men who look at the title

00:00:03.080 and immediately write it off. A real man, after all, doesn't care how he looks.

00:00:08.720 While it's a phrase that I hear quite often, it just isn't true. Washington, Alexander the Great,

00:00:14.880 Theodore Roosevelt, more recently, Jordan Peterson, just to name a few, are all men who

00:00:20.200 know the usefulness of their appearance. And that to me is the power of being conscious of your

00:00:24.740 style. It's not to peacock, but to perform. And today I'm joined by my friend, a man who is

00:00:31.440 extremely qualified to talk about how to level up your style. His name is Aaron Marino of Alpha M.

00:00:37.220 And today we talk about the functionality of style, how what you wear communicates to people who you are,

00:00:43.280 how dressing well helps instill a sense of respect in yourself and how improved style

00:00:48.920 will ultimately improve your life. You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest,

00:00:54.100 embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one

00:00:59.920 more time. Every time you are not easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong. This is

00:01:07.200 your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become at the end of the day. And after all is

00:01:13.080 said and done, you can call yourself a man. Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Mickler and I

00:01:19.380 am the host and the founder of this order of man podcast and the movement. I want to welcome you

00:01:24.200 here and tell you that I'm glad you're back or glad you're here for the first time. As I've said

00:01:28.340 before, we continue to grow. And that's a testament to the fact that you as a man are interested in

00:01:33.380 growing and learning and getting better and improving as a father and husband and business

00:01:39.160 owner, community leader, however you're showing up, it's important to you, which makes it important

00:01:43.360 to me. I've got a very good podcast lined up with a friend of mine who has been supporting the order

00:01:48.880 of man movement for a very, very long time. In fact, since day one, we get into that a little bit.

00:01:53.820 And I'm going to talk with you about that as you get to hear this interview and conversation before I

00:01:58.860 do, I want to make a mention of our show sponsors origin, Maine. It's starting to get pretty cold here

00:02:06.100 in Maine. And I've been wondering when I need to turn the heat on, but I'm just, I'm not ready to do

00:02:10.700 it yet. Cause if I turn the heat on, then I guess in a way I'm signifying and succumbing to the fact

00:02:15.380 that winter is fast approaching in Maine, which will be, which will be our second, uh, our second

00:02:21.080 winter. Now, anyways, the reason I bring that up is because it is now boot season. So guys, if you're

00:02:27.360 looking for a good looking pair of boots that are durable, rugged, a hundred percent sourced and made in

00:02:32.940 America, might I suggest to you origin boots again, a hundred percent sourced and made in America.

00:02:39.260 I personally, uh, really enjoy my bison leather boots. And I think you will as well. So check it

00:02:46.840 out, go to origin, Maine is in the state, Maine origin, Maine.com. And make sure if you end up

00:02:52.600 getting a pair of boots or jeans or whatever it is you get that you use the code order O-R-D-E-R

00:02:57.900 at checkout, because you're going to get a discount. So that's important. Save some money. If you're going

00:03:02.180 to get them anyways, and you want some American made boots, get them in origin and use the code

00:03:06.260 order O-R-D-E-R at origin, Maine.com. All right, guys, let me introduce you to my guest. His name

00:03:13.100 is Aaron Marino. And as I said, a minute ago, he has been a longtime friend and has been supporting

00:03:18.740 the order of men movement and me since day one. Uh, I met him years ago when I attended his men's

00:03:25.580 conference style con, which later become became men fluential. I've been able to get, get to know

00:03:30.260 him, uh, his background as a gym owner. And then later, you know, somebody who would go on to help

00:03:35.100 quite literally millions of men level up their style and their appearance and confidence, which

00:03:39.980 I know is a big issue for a lot of people. Uh, he's got over 6 million, I believe YouTube

00:03:44.400 subscribers. That's a crazy number to me. Uh, he owns multiple businesses, uh, but it's been a long

00:03:49.660 road to get him to this point. And today we talk about that journey and why he knows style is a very,

00:03:55.300 very powerful tool in every man's tool belt. Aaron, what's up, man. Thanks for joining me on the

00:04:01.260 podcast. I think, is this around two or three? I should have looked at, I don't know. Actually

00:04:05.260 know it's either two or three. Yeah, no, thank you so much for having me, man. I'm excited to come

00:04:10.360 back on. I, I've been seeing some of these guests. I'm like, man, he's totally, uh, he's outkicked this

00:04:15.780 coverage with me. Just with just myself in general, man. Like even sometimes I look at my lineup and I'm

00:04:22.620 like, why did these guys agree to come on? I don't know what, maybe I'm just a good salesman because

00:04:27.400 if they knew how it really was, I'm not sure they'd agree to do it. I don't know. It's amazing.

00:04:32.300 And so I, I, uh, I appreciate you, uh, coming down and slumming it with me for, for an hour.

00:04:37.580 I don't feel that way at all. In fact, I got to tell you, man, and I, and I told you this last week,

00:04:42.340 uh, I attribute a lot of our early success to you, uh, and your willingness to talk about what it is we

00:04:49.380 were doing when you had no reason to, uh, man, you put yourself out there to be able to share what we

00:04:56.280 were doing. And I, in fact, I don't know if I've ever told you this. I saw our, I don't know if it

00:05:02.700 was our, I think it was our website explode. It just like the amount of visits just exponentially

00:05:07.600 exploded within a few minutes of you sharing an article that I had drafted for the, uh,

00:05:15.340 Memfluential conference that I first attended. And it was your share that launched that up the way

00:05:21.440 it did. Well, there aren't many people that were writing nice things about me. So I'm like,

00:05:25.200 Oh yeah. Let's, let's share this. Everybody else wants to punch me in the face.

00:05:29.300 That's what I was thinking, man. I was thinking, you know what, if I can just appeal to his vanity

00:05:33.140 a little bit, maybe he'll share what we're doing and we're off to the races.

00:05:36.620 That's all it took. And then everybody shared it, right? All the guys that you talked about,

00:05:40.580 they were like, Oh, this is great. I'm excited about this conversation because

00:05:45.200 believe it or not, this will be one of the more controversial podcasts. And, and the reason I say

00:05:50.720 that is because it's amazing to me how often I hear guys say real men don't care about the way

00:05:58.480 they look. And while I, I, I kind of actually understand the sentiment, I think there's a huge

00:06:05.320 gap or a missing tool in the tool belt. If guys don't think about the way they look and how they

00:06:11.760 present themselves to women, to potential employers, to the public in general. And that's really what I

00:06:18.960 wanted to talk with you about today. Yeah, man. I, I think I, I understand the sentiment as well.

00:06:24.140 You know, I think that, um, I think too often we can, can think that, Oh, if, if I pay attention to

00:06:30.380 any aspect of my, my looks, I, you know, I'm, I'm going to be perceived as like super vain and, and I,

00:06:37.620 they feel like it's a slippery slope, right? Like once I start taking care of my hair, then it's like,

00:06:42.660 well, what's next? And they're, they worry about how they're going to be perceived and received from

00:06:46.420 other people. When the reality is, you know, what well-groomed means to me is different than what

00:06:50.900 it means to you. What, what dressing well means to me is different than what it means to my dad.

00:06:55.160 And so really it boils down to, you know, we live, regardless of if you agree or disagree,

00:07:01.460 we live in an increasingly competitive world. That's, you know, socially, that's professionally,

00:07:06.220 we are competing every day for the girl, for the guy, for the, for the, for the job,

00:07:11.840 for the contract, for whatever it may be. And it is in our best interest to basically put our best

00:07:19.280 foot forward, because if we're not taking care of ourselves, our competition is. And if you put

00:07:24.220 two people in the same, you know, up for the same job, up for the same relationship, all things on

00:07:28.760 paper being equal, whether or not they, you know, they both went to a great school, they both, you

00:07:33.040 know, just excelled at their last job. One person pays attention to the way that he presents himself and,

00:07:38.740 and make sure that his clothes fit him, that he, that he smells okay. The other person doesn't

00:07:43.640 a hundred percent of the time, the guy who took the little bit of time extra that morning to get

00:07:48.800 together and make sure that he, he looked good and presented himself in the best manner possible.

00:07:53.280 He gets the job, he gets the girl, he gets the agreement, he gets the sale a hundred percent of

00:07:58.600 the time, as opposed to the other guy. But I understand, I understand that when you think,

00:08:03.120 oh, you know, I shouldn't worry about that. I don't know if that's a hundred percent true.

00:08:08.740 Yeah. And you know, it's interesting because I don't think it's mutually exclusive, or I don't

00:08:13.140 think one, you focusing on your skillset, let's say has to come at the expense of you just

00:08:19.840 improving your style, improving the way that you look a little bit. But I think the disconnect,

00:08:24.720 and it was for me for a lot of years is that when men hear style or they hear fashion, or they think

00:08:31.340 about the way they look, what they immediately jumped to the conclusion of, especially those who have

00:08:35.980 never even considered it before, is three piece suit, which in a lot of contexts would be completely

00:08:43.080 inappropriate and doesn't mean that you're dressed well for the occasion.

00:08:47.840 Absolutely. No, this is, this is, this is absolutely true, but it, but it's interesting,

00:08:52.760 right? I mean, I look at you, I look at your evolution and you know, it's about being, you know,

00:08:59.140 sort of specific and, and purposeful with the way that you're presenting yourself. And so when I first

00:09:03.980 met you, your beard was smaller, right? And then it grew and it got really big. Well,

00:09:08.700 there's something interesting that happened. You cut it off or you cut it down, you know,

00:09:12.780 a little while ago. And it was amazing just, and this is just me, my perception. If I'm somebody

00:09:18.560 who doesn't know you, having a beard is great, right? It symbolizes, you know, strength. It can make

00:09:24.160 you look more masculine, but a super long beard can become very polarizing, right? And, and it can give

00:09:30.920 a different opinion or different impression based on the person that is receiving that.

00:09:35.440 And so by you having the long beard, you were eliminating certain people from, you know, tuning

00:09:41.360 in or believing or buying into what you were talking about because they automatically had a

00:09:46.000 preconceived notion that somebody with a long beard or somebody that was a bit, you know, more

00:09:51.020 had the, the illusion or the impression that a little bit more, you know, I don't know what,

00:09:57.120 what the impression is, but I mean, Eric Banholz, another one of our friends, you know, same sort

00:10:01.540 of thing, you know, a beard, you know, can, can, when it's worn, can be almost like a, a, a,

00:10:07.420 you're wearing confidence, but there comes a point at which it becomes that switch flips

00:10:12.080 and it becomes a bit more polarizing. And so by you cutting it back, you actually now are more,

00:10:17.480 you know, you, you appeal to more people, I think, in, in terms of, um, you know, your aesthetic,

00:10:22.980 but it was purposeful. There's a reason why you dress the way that you do. There's a reason why

00:10:28.100 you wear that hat. There's a reason why you're wearing boots. It's very purposeful. And that's

00:10:33.220 sort of, I guess, the takeaway is that it doesn't have to be double monk straps and three piece

00:10:37.940 suits, whatever your style is. It's about identifying something that makes you feel great

00:10:42.880 about yourself that you feel confident wearing, but it doesn't mean that you've got to, you know,

00:10:48.040 gel your hair up and tweeze your eyebrows. It just means that you're paying attention and being

00:10:52.600 deliberate and purposeful about what you're wearing, because you understand that it is

00:10:57.240 your brand, you know, our, our outfit, our style, the way that we present ourself, the car that we

00:11:02.220 drive, this is our personal packaging, just like, you know, Nike is branded and, and, you know,

00:11:07.180 everything in this, in our society has a branding. You know, there's a reason why you go to a Ritz

00:11:12.780 Carlton and that they charge a certain premium versus a Howard Johnson or a Motel six. They do and

00:11:18.800 serve the, basically the same purpose, but one has a different, you know, sort of

00:11:22.220 you associate more higher end now, granted it is higher end, but, but they both serve the same

00:11:28.580 purpose, but it's about the branding that makes a big difference when it comes to your style and

00:11:33.540 the way that you're received by others. You know, brand is a really interesting word

00:11:38.180 because I think, you know, you and I get that. I think people in similar industries would get that,

00:11:43.920 but a lot of our listeners, I think would associate the term brand with trying to gain the

00:11:50.800 approval of others, uh, trying to gimmick for lack of a better word, your way into, or fake it till

00:11:58.020 you make it. And when I hear brand, I think this is about influence and every guy listening to the

00:12:05.000 podcast wants to be more influential. Even if it's with his kids, I just want you to get your dishes

00:12:11.040 done or, or, or, or your wife, you know, I want to lead and inspire you to improve yourself or your

00:12:18.580 employees who you want to get just that much more production from these things are all part of your

00:12:24.680 brand and your level of influence. You know, one thing I think about as you talk about this with,

00:12:29.840 with the beard, for example, I tend to be very pragmatic, right? So the things that I wear,

00:12:36.740 the way that I have my beard is very practical in application. And so the reason I decided actually

00:12:42.600 to trim my beard back in large part was due to, uh, Brazilian jujitsu. Like it was just getting

00:12:48.420 yanked on and ripped out and pulled on. And, and I think that's one of the factors that you ought to

00:12:53.920 consider when you're worrying about your style and caring about what you wear is how pragmatic and

00:13:00.040 practical is this, but still look good in the process. Carl, uh, I can't remember his last name

00:13:05.760 right off hand or even pronounce his last name right off hand when you were talking about him

00:13:09.340 last week. Yeah. Murowski. Murowski. There you go. Um, you know, works on the railroad, you know,

00:13:16.120 blue collar yet still looks good, but still fits the, the, the accepted norm for his industry and his

00:13:25.020 chosen profession. Absolutely. You know, and something else that I think about, and, and when I,

00:13:30.000 I used to, the way that I got into talking about style, it was, um, it was really from,

00:13:34.860 you know, a, uh, I, I had a fitness center that, that closed and there was a friend of mine who,

00:13:39.680 um, or a client who wanted to go out on a date. He just didn't know what to wear,

00:13:43.280 but he wanted to look good. And so he, uh, he asked me, he's like, Hey, do you know what I should

00:13:48.380 wear? I said, ah, I don't know, but why don't I come over, see what you have and we'll go shopping

00:13:53.040 and, and, you know, you need to get your haircut and be well groomed. But this was a, the start of sort

00:13:58.640 of an image consulting business. I didn't realize what I was doing, but the interesting thing and what I

00:14:03.220 would always do when guys would approach me and say, well, you know, I don't know, it's, it's not,

00:14:08.340 I shouldn't be paying attention to this. It's not important. You know, do you want your significant

00:14:12.800 other, your wife, your girlfriend, you want her to take care of herself? And the answer is, you

00:14:17.520 know, undoubtedly, yeah, it's a show of respect to some degree. It's a show of just caring about

00:14:22.800 yourself. And I, Eric, can I interject right there with one thing? Yeah. Yeah. I would also say,

00:14:28.380 yeah, it's a show of respect, completely agree. But also I would say this, do you want your wife 0.97

00:14:34.320 to listen to you? I do. I do. Sometimes he does. Do you, yeah. Occasionally it happens. Do you want

00:14:44.560 your kids to pay attention? Do you want your client to buy your product? Yes. Those are the things that

00:14:51.420 you want. And the way you look, isn't all of it, but it's a part of it. No doubt. It's a part of it.

00:14:58.920 If you're dressing in your pajamas and you don't ever groom yourself, you know, or, or look good or

00:15:05.300 smell good, your wife is going to pay less attention to you. She's going to be less influenced by you. 1.00

00:15:11.540 Anyway, I wanted to interject that, but continue. No, it's true. And, and, and I also, I think about it

00:15:16.360 like this, you know, your wife, her most important accessory is not her handbag. It's not her shoes.

00:15:22.260 It's the man whose arm she's walking into a party or an event or dinner with. And so you are

00:15:28.040 representing, you know, her as well. And so, um, you know, you want her to take care of herself,

00:15:33.880 I'm sure. And, and, and smell good and not be a savage. And she wants the return from you. 0.75

00:15:39.500 Um, unfortunately women don't have the ability very often to, um, to, to explain this to their 1.00

00:15:46.140 men because, you know, they know that we, as men, a lot of times have fragile egos, right?

00:15:50.600 It's like, what do you mean? You want me to, to look better? What do you mean? You don't want me to,

00:15:54.680 you know, dress like crap. It's, um, it's something that not necessarily a lot of men are, 0.98

00:15:59.680 are comfortable hearing because they take it as criticism as opposed to opportunity for improvement

00:16:04.800 and to help her be more attracted to you. You know, I also think there's a problem with

00:16:12.180 dressing up, but not having the depth behind it. And, and so you see a lot of these guys who

00:16:20.520 I would use the term peacocking, right? So they'll dress up to try to compensate for their own 1.00

00:16:26.560 inadequacies. And I think the antithesis to that, at least in a fictional level would be like James Bond,

00:16:32.520 right? You look at this guy, he's always got the amazing suit. He's got the car, he's got the hair,

00:16:38.200 like he's just the, but he's also got the skillset, right? To justify, to warrant what he wears,

00:16:46.460 how he shows up. I even think on a, on a real level is somebody like Conor McGregor, you know,

00:16:52.360 you look at this individual and the things that he wear wears is, are way out there, right? Like,

00:16:59.120 but he can justify it because he's got the skillset to back it up. And I think that's where a lot of

00:17:06.160 guys fall short is they think that, Hey, if I improve my style, this is imposter syndrome. Like

00:17:12.000 I'm, I'm just peacocking, but I don't really have the depth or the capability to back up these things

00:17:17.440 that I'm going to, I'm going to wear. I agree. I agree. Um, I don't necessarily, I think, you know,

00:17:24.940 I think it's interesting whenever I would work with somebody, you know, typically it was not,

00:17:29.840 you know, when you think about upgrading your style, it's not about, you know, going from A to Z. It's

00:17:34.760 about small incremental things that you can do different or a little better that will have a

00:17:38.720 dramatic impact on the way that you come across and the way that you present, you know, everything from,

00:17:43.840 you know, the fit of your jeans, you know, slight little things or choosing, you know,

00:17:48.280 higher quality shoes that are going to not look super cheap. Um, you know, shirts that fit you

00:17:53.000 better that are, you know, the, the, a color that, you know, isn't going to be super offensive. It's,

00:17:58.420 it's all these small little things that people aren't necessarily going to call you out. Cause

00:18:02.980 that's the other thing, Ryan, that a lot of guys are worried about. They're like, well,

00:18:05.840 if I start paying attention, if I start doing this, other people, other men are going to notice.

00:18:11.220 Mm-hmm. And, and so that's something that a lot of guys, that prevents a lot of men from,

00:18:15.620 from actually taking the next step or trying something a little bit outside of their comfort

00:18:19.700 zone. Cause they're worried about looking like they're actually paying attention to their style.

00:18:24.040 And, and the reality is that, that, you know, I think that, you know, yes, they could notice,

00:18:29.840 but it's not something to, uh, similar example. A lot of guys want to try growing facial hair,

00:18:35.880 right? A lot of guys like the beard, right? A beard is, is sort of like the new thing. It's been the

00:18:40.900 thing, but I mean, for, for ages and ages and ages, but men who are clean shaven, they've got this,

00:18:46.300 this, this, this desire to grow a beard. Well, they'll start to grow five o'clock shadow. They'll

00:18:51.220 shave under their neck. Somebody will notice, oh, you're growing a beard. Now I forgot to shave

00:18:55.120 instead of just saying, yeah, I'm trying to grow a beard, right? It's like, no, I see you shaved

00:18:59.420 under there. Don't lie to me. It's okay. You know, just admit it. It's okay. And so same sort of thing.

00:19:04.440 Like if you, if, if you want to try something different, you know, do it. And if somebody

00:19:08.780 notices just embrace and say, yeah, it's there's, there's absolutely nothing wrong with it. There

00:19:13.440 shouldn't be anyway. I think that's a good lesson in just ownership, right? We try to deflect and

00:19:18.760 we try to pretend we're not doing things that we really are, but you know what, like what's wrong

00:19:22.980 with growing a beard and seeing how it looks. And I know for me, like I, I like a beard. I think it

00:19:27.720 looks better on me. It covers up more of my face, which is always a good thing. Ideal. That is why I have

00:19:32.060 one as well. Yeah, it is. It is just really interesting when you have people come out of

00:19:39.180 the woodworks, whether it's your friends and tell you, oh, you know, you're, they mock you. Right.

00:19:44.260 I had a buddy come over this last weekend and he was wearing jeans that were a little tighter

00:19:48.020 than normal, not skinny jeans or anything by any means, but a little tighter than normal. And his

00:19:52.800 buddy had razzed him the entire road trip on the way up here. And I'm like, when he got out of the

00:19:57.540 car, I'm like, bro, you look good, man. Like you actually look like you've been working out. I've been

00:20:01.580 working out. He's like, nah, I'm like, you look like it. Cause you have a better fitting pair of

00:20:05.400 jeans. Like you just, you look better. Right. And that, that instills, I think, even to a small

00:20:11.180 degree, a sense of confidence from the people that you're trying to lead and inspire.

00:20:16.600 Sure. Another great example is, is, is Tanner Guzzi, right? You know, Tanner, Tanner really does an

00:20:23.320 incredible job at sort of taking the, the femininity out of looking good and really sort of does an 0.74

00:20:31.160 amazing job sort of breaking it down and really in practical ways explains why we dress the way

00:20:38.740 that we do. And, and throughout history, you know, whether or not it was warriors putting war paint

00:20:43.180 on or, or, you know, soldiers, there is a reason why people dress the way that they do. And, and in

00:20:50.200 today's society, there also needs to be a reason why you dress the way that you do and dress with

00:20:54.920 intention and purpose because it does make a difference. And in terms of respect and being

00:21:00.320 able to lead, like you were mentioning. So let, let's, let's take a guy who, who knows he can

00:21:06.860 improve in this department and, and feels like he has a desire to improve the way that he looks so

00:21:13.240 that he can be more influential and lead people more effectively. And look, here's the deal. I'm not

00:21:18.840 saying that just improving the way you look will automatically inspire other people. It's just

00:21:25.460 one little tool in the arsenal. That's all I'm saying. Where does a guy start who wants to get

00:21:31.500 on the path? Like a guy who's like, never worried about this in his life. And all of a sudden now he's

00:21:36.320 like, okay, I'm listening to Aaron. I'm listening to Ryan. This makes sense. What do I need to do?

00:21:40.160 Where do I need to go without looking like, you know, Prince or something like that?

00:21:43.800 Right. Cause that's what guys have in their minds. You know, the, there are certain stores I think

00:21:50.040 that, um, that lend itself to a more sort of a, a, a, a good aesthetic. That's not too like over the

00:21:57.640 top, you know, a store like, and I'm just going to use these two, like the gap, banana Republic,

00:22:01.960 um, even J crew, some department stores, you know, some basic stores that sell the basics. You know,

00:22:08.340 it's not about wearing skin tight, you know, pants or, you know, sequined shirts. It's about

00:22:13.220 just finding first off clothing that fits you better. That's cut better because that's,

00:22:18.280 that's the thing. There is a big difference. And the beautiful thing in, in the time at which we

00:22:22.380 live now, stylistically speaking, is that, you know, it used to be 10 years ago that everything

00:22:27.740 was cut the same, you know, whether or not it was shirts and pants, you went in and you were either

00:22:31.940 a small, medium, large, or extra large. Well, with the, the, you know, idea that people are getting

00:22:37.160 more interested in wearing clothes that fit them better and they want to look better, you know,

00:22:41.400 designers and manufacturers have realized, okay, there are different fits. And so now you can find

00:22:46.160 slim fit and skin and straight, low rise and athletic, and there are a lot of different

00:22:50.640 options. And so really finding, um, clothing and, and, and identifying what body type and structure

00:22:56.500 you have, and then finding clothes that fit you the best and most appropriately. And so I would say,

00:23:01.620 start at the feet and work your way up, you know, great, get a, get a pair of shoes that you like,

00:23:06.560 that you love. Um, you know, in terms of, of sneakers, you know, there, there, see, it's hard

00:23:13.720 because depending on the audience, depending on what you are, I mean, the, the first pair of shoes

00:23:17.980 or the first pair of jeans that you buy, that's really going to be determined upon, you know,

00:23:21.980 your lifestyle and what you're into. But, um, there are, um, I would say, start at the feet and

00:23:26.940 work your way up, you know, a great pair of jeans, a nice pair of shoes that are sort of higher quality

00:23:31.540 because in shoes, oftentimes you do, and boots, you get what you pay for in terms of quality.

00:23:36.240 And I would rather somebody invest a little bit more money and stretch their budget slightly

00:23:39.980 to get a higher quality pair of shoes or boots. That's going to last you, you know, five years,

00:23:45.040 10 years versus something that's just cheap and it falls apart in six months. You know, quality is,

00:23:50.880 is a big deal and making sure that you're buying clothes that are going to last you, not just the

00:23:55.360 season, but actually for, for a few years is also important. You know, I've noticed with boots,

00:24:01.400 specifically, like I have origin boots, they're bison leather. They're incredible. And, and I've

00:24:06.260 had boots and I've worn boots for a lot of years. The, the better that you take care of them actually,

00:24:12.460 and the longer you wear them, the better they look too. Like if you're, if you're willing to

00:24:16.160 invest in the way that they look, you condition them, you keep them clean. They look better.

00:24:21.820 They feel better. They're going to last longer. It's better to invest in these types of things than

00:24:27.400 just take the cheap and easy route or even worse, have your wife pick out your clothes. 1.00

00:24:32.420 Yeah. That's, that's something that that's even, yes, exactly. Even worse is a, yeah. Don't let

00:24:38.100 style is nobody's responsibility other than your own. And I think that that's something that you

00:24:42.860 just need to understand is that you need to take ownership in what you're wearing and, and making

00:24:49.220 sure that you figure out what you like, because oftentimes you'll see, you know, a lot of women 1.00

00:24:53.520 who will be married or, or with somebody who doesn't like the shop, they'll go shopping and

00:24:57.980 just buy what they see their friend's husband's wearing or what's on sale or, or what they think

00:25:02.780 the, the man should be wearing. And they have, they've got their own problems trying to figure

00:25:07.040 out what looks great on them. They're not worried about you. They're just going to buy you, you know,

00:25:11.260 whatever stuff that's good enough. And, and unfortunately, you know, it's, it's, it's not going to be

00:25:18.440 your taste. Chances are, it's also not going to fit you ideally. And so go to the store.

00:25:22.360 The reason why store clerks are there to help you. And so if you're not sure what pair or

00:25:26.460 what style or what bit of jeans is going to work best on you, ask them, ask for assistance,

00:25:30.940 take a few, you know, a few minutes, take a, take a half hour to try on a bunch of different

00:25:35.200 pairs. A lot of times with, with shopping, and I understand this because it can get a little

00:25:39.340 bit overwhelming. You're there for 30 minutes and you're like, all right, get me out of here.

00:25:43.400 I just want to leave. You just want to go in and get what you want to get. And then,

00:25:46.140 and then jet. But when it comes to finding specific key pieces, like a suit, like,

00:25:52.360 you know, slacks, if you're wearing them to work, like a pair of chinos or, or,

00:25:56.360 you know, pants that you're going to be wearing on a regular basis, even jeans,

00:26:00.040 just take the time. If you need to break it up into different shopping sessions, do that.

00:26:04.700 But just take the time and, and, and, and don't rush things because it's going to be the difference

00:26:09.920 between you actually finding something that fits you amazing and that you love and just wearing

00:26:13.620 something that's okay.

00:26:14.480 One thing, one strategy I've found that worked really well is if you find a pair of jeans or a

00:26:20.280 shirt or a pair of shoes or whatever that, that you like, that fits you good, that looks good,

00:26:24.980 that instills a sense of confidence in yourself by five color variations and, and you're done like

00:26:31.740 for the week, you know, you've got, you've got a pair of jeans for every week because you've got

00:26:35.720 five different washes that you can wear and it eliminates time. It eliminates the frustration.

00:26:41.780 And then just keep buying that pair, but in different color variations.

00:26:46.500 Yeah. I wear the same jeans every day.

00:26:48.880 That's what I'm saying.

00:26:49.980 The same jeans. That's, that's the thing, you know, you, you don't have to,

00:26:53.920 you know, get that one pair that fits you amazing, that looks great. And it's going to be the most

00:26:58.360 versatile and highly worn pair of a, or item that in your wardrobe. And so, yeah, you don't need the

00:27:04.220 frustrating thing though, is when they discontinue that pair and you're like, damn it,

00:27:07.560 they don't have that same style that I've been wearing that I really like anymore.

00:27:11.060 Boot cut jeans. When boot cut jeans went away, I saw, I was freaking out because I was the guy

00:27:16.160 that was wearing boot cut jeans longer than I probably should have. And when they started

00:27:19.660 discontinuing those, I was freaking out literally. And so, yeah, I understand what you're saying,

00:27:24.100 Ryan. It is, it is a sad day when the boot cut jeans went out of business or went out of style.

00:27:30.700 So how does a guy assess himself? All right. So you're looking at yourself and you're like,

00:27:35.920 yeah, I look pretty good, but you probably don't. Right. So how do you objectively assess

00:27:40.820 whether or not what you're wearing? Cause look with the beard, when I had it long,

00:27:45.640 just to go back to what we were talking about earlier, I was like, this is cool. You know,

00:27:48.340 it looks good. I like it. And now that I have it short, I look at pictures. I'm like,

00:27:51.800 look at that freaking rat's nest. That was ugly, but I didn't know it when I had it or I was being 0.99

00:27:57.920 delusional. How do you assess yourself? You know, assessing yourself is tough because that requires you to,

00:28:03.880 you know, basically be honest with yourself, but getting advice from, from other people or asking

00:28:10.160 for feedback is also, I'm not sure which is harder being honest with yourself or asking for feedback

00:28:15.080 from people that, you know, you know, if you're securing yourself and you've got somebody in your

00:28:20.200 life that you may be like their style. Maybe it's a mentor, maybe it's a coworker, you know, ask them

00:28:26.880 for, for advice, you know, ask them for, you know, feedback. I think that that's one of the things

00:28:31.820 that, that, that stands in a lot of men's way. They, they, they feel like we, I either should

00:28:37.000 know how to do something, or if I ask somebody, I don't want to be laughed at. And, and, and you

00:28:42.360 don't actually, you know, seek, seek help because you're so fearful of what somebody else is going

00:28:47.140 to say. And the truth is, you know, it's style. It's not that serious. You know, if you've got a

00:28:52.160 friend, a coworker, somebody that you respect, somebody that you like their, their aesthetic,

00:28:56.420 ask them. Now, of course you don't want to ask, you know, if you, if you're a, a, a, a denim jacket,

00:29:02.640 you know, jeans and a flannel shirt type of guy, and that's your style and your aesthetic,

00:29:06.880 you don't want to ask the guy that's wearing skin tight sequin, you know, shirts at work,

00:29:11.160 you know, because obviously that's going to be a disconnect, but it's about finding somebody

00:29:14.720 that you can actually ask for feedback. And then maybe, you know, put some clothes, put some,

00:29:19.760 put some clothes on, take some pictures of some items that you wear and send them and say,

00:29:24.100 hey, what do you think of these? Do you think these are good? Do you think these are

00:29:26.320 bad? Did these fit me? Okay. Um, I, but that I know is going to be very hard for a lot of people

00:29:31.260 to do. It is hard. You know, one thing you, you bring up the sequence. One thing I've been

00:29:35.860 very, very aware of is the, I call it like bedazzled where you see these guys who wear,

00:29:44.160 you know, sequined shirts or big flowery pockets on their jeans. And I'm like, guys,

00:29:49.460 I appreciate the effort. Yeah. True religion, man. It was, it was, it was one brand.

00:29:56.400 True religion. Yep. Exactly. True religion, affliction, all those like, uh, butt bling, 1.00

00:30:01.520 I used to call it, but yeah. But bling. Yeah. Yep. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You 0.53

00:30:05.560 know? And, and the other thing is if you go simple and, and classic, you don't worry about like a lot

00:30:10.160 of patterns, you know, stay basic with your color scheme. Um, you know, monochromatic always looks good.

00:30:17.040 You know, black looks amazing on everybody. Um, you know, really staying basic and not trying to 0.97

00:30:22.780 be too trendy. Um, that's going to be a good tool. Also, if you're going shopping, right? If you go

00:30:28.700 into a store and you look around and everybody who works there, everybody who's shopping there

00:30:32.200 is younger than you by 10 years, chances are that's the wrong store for you. Uh, one part of it is

00:30:37.320 dressing, you know, one part of style is understanding what age appropriate means. Now,

00:30:42.520 you know, age appropriate also is, is, is a little bit tricky though, because, you know,

00:30:46.300 just because you might be an older gentleman, this, and, and you might like a specific style

00:30:51.580 of jeans or, or shirt or leather jacket. It doesn't mean that you can't, if young people

00:30:56.160 are wearing it, it's just about being honest and blending and trying to figure out the best

00:31:00.380 sort of blend of, of, you know, your style with, you know, some youthful options as well.

00:31:06.540 It's, it's, yeah, that's interesting. Well, I've seen, and I don't know, maybe you can correct

00:31:12.120 me if I'm wrong, but I've seen women more guilty of this. We, you, you see these 50 year old women, 1.00

00:31:16.360 for example, and they're wearing what their teenage daughters are wearing. I'm like, what

00:31:19.600 you don't even look, you don't even look attractive. Like I'm not even attracted to you

00:31:26.140 right now, you know, but if you dressed for your age and you look classy and you look nice and you

00:31:31.600 look mature, I would be significantly more attracted to a woman like that than somebody who's 1.00

00:31:37.100 trying to dress like their teenage daughter. A hundred percent. Same thing goes for guys.

00:31:41.620 You'll see a lot of guys that are shopping at some of these stores like the Abercrombie's and

00:31:45.260 Hollister's and, and things that, you know, have logos, American Eagle. Not that there's anything

00:31:50.160 wrong with those stores, but there comes an age at which that's not necessarily appropriate or your

00:31:55.940 best look. And so, you know, if you stay clean, if you stay classic with the, the patterns of your

00:32:01.660 clothing along with the colors and the fit, that's ultimately going to be the best option because it's

00:32:06.820 going to be stylish now. It's also going to be stylish in five years from now. And, and, you

00:32:12.100 know, you're not going to stand out and look like that guy that obviously is trying to look

00:32:16.460 too young and like he's having a midlife crisis. Well, and that's a great point. I think what you

00:32:22.180 have to do when you're looking at the things that you're wearing is ask yourself, why am I wearing

00:32:26.800 this? Is it to make yourself look long younger? Because look, I've, I do not have a desire to look

00:32:33.520 younger because older men are typically thought of as wiser, right? More intelligent, wealthier,

00:32:42.460 have more influence. I don't want to look younger. I want to look more mature, right? And so you got

00:32:47.040 to be careful of what is it that you're trying to accomplish. And then you can adjust your style

00:32:51.940 based on that. You know, the other, the other interesting thing that I have found, I thought if

00:32:57.080 you were to ask me, you know, 10 years ago about getting older, I would have, I was really worried

00:33:03.780 about it 10 years ago. I was worried about getting older. I was worried about getting gray hair. I was

00:33:07.880 worried about wrinkles. But what I've come to realize is that, um, for me, as I've gotten older,

00:33:13.500 I'm 44 years old now. Um, I am totally good with it. And I think really more than anything,

00:33:19.080 it boils down to how satisfied and content and happy you are with your life. I think that when

00:33:25.780 you really do what you want to do and you love doing and, and you've sort of followed your direction

00:33:32.580 as opposed to live for other people, you get a lot more comfortable in your own skin and aging and

00:33:39.000 getting older does not scare me or scare you as much. Um, I also feel like, you know, I, I mentioned

00:33:45.600 in reference, you know, the whole like midlife crisis. I personally think that that's, you know,

00:33:50.800 the midlife crisis is in my opinion, you probably have a different, different, you know, idea of this.

00:33:56.080 But for me, I think that that's somebody who has not lived their life to their, on their terms. You

00:34:01.800 know, it's somebody who, who wasn't honest with themselves. He did everything for other people

00:34:06.580 and never truly became the man that he wanted to be. He's, he's been a great husband, a provider,

00:34:12.980 but then one day he's like, wait a second, I am not happy because this is not sort of, I, I,

00:34:18.440 I didn't follow my, my path. It was, it was for somebody else, but I don't know. I mean, you,

00:34:24.920 you probably have a different perception of that or, or idea of that. No, I agree. I, you know,

00:34:30.180 in a lot of ways, I would say over the past couple of years specifically, I felt pretty good with who I

00:34:36.240 am and where I am and the work I'm doing. And, and I think that level of confidence, which I think is

00:34:42.560 earned, it's not fabricated. Otherwise it's just arrogance or ego. It's not confidence.

00:34:47.500 It has been earned. And so I think it, I think it, people can see it. Right. And you know,

00:34:52.780 I look at you, for example, Aaron, you know, I, I see a little gray right here in the beard.

00:34:56.660 Little, are you kidding me? Yeah. Well, you know what I got, I got lots of it coming in.

00:35:01.040 I see, I see some grays in my beard and in my stash and you don't dye it. Like it's there, man.

00:35:07.600 Own it.

00:35:08.000 I would actually think less. Like I would be like, what's he doing? Like, you're not fooling

00:35:12.840 anybody. But I look at it and I think, man, this is a guy who's stepping into his own. He's earned

00:35:18.920 those white hairs. He's got a little wisdom behind him. And so I can respect and appreciate that rather

00:35:24.620 than trying to cover it all up, you know? Yeah. And it's about taking care of yourself

00:35:28.260 physically. You know, regardless of the age that you are, if you take care of your body,

00:35:31.980 you exercise every day. I, I'm a firm believer that you should exercise every single day,

00:35:36.680 whether or not it's for 10 minutes or 30 minutes. Exercise for me was the single best thing that's

00:35:41.900 ever happened to me in terms of my confidence. But it also helps you in, in every single aspect

00:35:47.800 of your life. You know, take care of yourself, eat right. Don't smoke, don't do drugs, don't drink

00:35:52.760 in excess. You know, if you take care of yourself, your body will show. But if you, you know, take your

00:35:57.960 shirt off and you take, you know, your clothes off and you look like hell, I can pretty much tell you

00:36:03.060 what your lifestyle has been like, or a pretty good, you know, you know, estimation of, of, uh,

00:36:09.740 of what you've been doing. And so, you know, take care of yourself physically. That is going to be

00:36:14.600 and make the biggest difference in terms of you aging gracefully or not.

00:36:19.740 Men, let me hit the, uh, the timeout button, the pause button real quick on the conversation.

00:36:23.220 Uh, we now have nearly 10,000 men who've gone through this new and free, uh, battle ready program.

00:36:30.040 I literally get, uh, dozens or more emails every day from those of you who are going through the

00:36:35.360 process or have even completed it. And I'm stoked to know that it's making a difference in your life.

00:36:41.100 You know, too many men have no idea what the hell they should be doing with their life

00:36:44.780 and how to ensure that they're on the right track. And while this course, it's not going to do the work

00:36:49.960 for you, of course, uh, and it won't guarantee results. It will get you pointed in the right direction

00:36:54.900 and it will give you a track to run on, uh, regardless of what your goals are. Doesn't matter if

00:36:59.140 you're trying to lose weight, uh, secure a promotion, uh, be a better father or husband,

00:37:03.800 uh, just whatever area of life you're trying to improve. This is going to help you line it out

00:37:07.960 and get you closer to achieving those goals. So if you want to learn more and register for,

00:37:13.300 again, this free course, head to order of man.com slash battle ready order of man.com slash battle

00:37:18.920 ready. You can do that after the show for now, let's get back to the conversation with Aaron.

00:37:23.020 Right. Right. And, and, and your clothes and the things you wear certainly are going to fit

00:37:29.280 better on you. They're going to look better on you. It's just better for sure. And in addition

00:37:34.940 to everything else you're talking about. All right. So here's what I wanted to do.

00:37:38.860 Okay. I want you to give me an honest assessment of my, now don't judge me on what I'm wearing today.

00:37:45.300 Cause I've got like, I've been working out. Okay. I just got done with my training. So don't judge me

00:37:49.140 on what I'm wearing right now. Okay. I squeeze it in when I can. And truth be told, I slept in this

00:37:54.260 morning, like shit, I gotta, I gotta go to the gym. So I did it this afternoon and I'm jumping on 0.99

00:37:58.440 after my workout, but here's what I typically wear. I wear a hat just about every day. I've got a

00:38:06.120 t-shirt. Usually it has some sort of graphic on it, not cartoonish, not, not immature, but a graphic

00:38:13.500 because it's order of man or something like that. I wear blue jeans and I wear boots.

00:38:19.140 That's what I wear. Coach me.

00:38:23.260 There's nothing to coach. That's a, that's honestly, I mean, it's, it's, it's you, it's your

00:38:28.060 look. It's, it's what works for you. And, and I think that's, you know, I think it's, I think it's

00:38:32.960 perfect. I think that for what you're doing, it, it sort of says to the world sort of what you're

00:38:37.920 about. And, um, I think, I think it's, it's perfect. I mean, I literally wear, you know, t-shirt

00:38:43.940 jeans, boots. That's pretty much my, what are your thoughts about, um, about graphic t-shirts?

00:38:51.460 What are your thoughts? I think, no, I think graphic t-shirts, I think they're, they're

00:38:55.240 absolutely fine. I think they do look a little bit youthful oftentimes, but it really depends

00:38:59.040 on what, what it actually says on it. Um, graphic t-shirts, if you're talking about something with

00:39:03.600 your logo or, you know, something that you're talking about Ryan or wearing, that's totally

00:39:08.720 acceptable and appropriate. And I think it looks great. Now, obviously you don't want to wear

00:39:13.060 that if you're going out to a nice restaurant, but you know, for general every day, you know,

00:39:17.900 this is who I am. I think it works. Um, now, you know, obviously you don't want to wear anything

00:39:22.620 that is too outlandish or too, um, offensive because I've seen some graphic t-shirts on the 0.84

00:39:27.200 other hand that are, that are just ignorant. And, um, and I think that that's something where 0.53

00:39:32.400 I've got friends that have swear words on their shirts. I'm like, yeah, they think it's funny.

00:39:35.220 It's not funny. Nobody thinks it's funny. Nobody's laughing. And, and it honestly is going to

00:39:40.020 automatically make people lose respect for you. If you, if you are doing that, or you have,

00:39:45.040 you know, pot leaves on your, your, your, your socks or whatever it may be. Um, it's about

00:39:50.420 presenting the package and the person that you want other people to, you know, receive you as.

00:39:55.460 And so, um, you know, unfortunately our image is not what we think it is. It's what other people

00:40:00.800 think it is honestly. And so. That's a great, that's a great statement because I, I, I think this

00:40:06.860 comes with a culture of like the zero F's mentality. I don't give a crap what anybody else thinks. And 0.98

00:40:11.740 it's like, you know, we think what we have to say is the most important thing. The way we show up is

00:40:16.820 the most important thing. And what we fail to realize is that people are interpreting what you

00:40:22.760 say, how you say it, the way you wear your hair or a hat or the clothes that you wear, whether you

00:40:28.580 like it or not. And people will say, well, that's not fair. It doesn't matter. People are interpreting that.

00:40:34.020 Exactly. And so you can either ignore it or get your ego in the way and say, well, I don't care

00:40:40.960 what anybody thinks about me or what I wear. Or you could say, all right, this is a factor.

00:40:47.060 So why don't I play to it and use it to my advantage? Cause I'll beat the guy who doesn't

00:40:52.120 all day long. No, absolutely. And, and the other thing is, you know, developing an, a, a,

00:40:57.220 a sort of uniform per se, you know, like you, Ryan have a uniform. I have a uniform,

00:41:03.660 no doubt, you know, super successful people like Mark Zuckerberg and, and, and all these other,

00:41:08.240 you know, all these other like super crazy, successful people, you look at them and you're

00:41:12.600 like, Oh, why does he wear this every single day? And there's, there's something to be said for,

00:41:17.420 um, consistency. Um, there's, there's a term called decision fatigue, right? And so one of the

00:41:22.920 reasons why, you know, Mark Zuckerberg wears what he wears every single day is that he,

00:41:27.720 it's one less decision. He has adopted that look for him. He's the tech, you know, guy who,

00:41:33.060 who doesn't give an F. And so he's wearing the hoodie and his, he's wearing the jeans and the

00:41:37.360 sneakers every single day, but that's what he's adopted for himself. Um, uh, Steve jobs, another

00:41:43.500 one always would see him in a black sweater, you know, jeans. That's it. That was his uniform.

00:41:48.260 And so you don't need to necessarily have 27,000, you know, items of clothing. It's about finding

00:41:54.800 specific pieces and clothing that works for you and then modifying it. But what I've found is that

00:42:00.840 even though, you know, I do this for a living, I have a YouTube channel that has, you know,

00:42:04.720 that I'm, I'm talking about style. I've got a ton of suits. I never, ever, ever wear suits.

00:42:09.160 I literally could, if you threw out everything in my wardrobe, there are 10 things that I would

00:42:13.860 probably keep and I could wear them every single day. And so really it's about finding

00:42:17.960 specific pieces that, that you love, you know, the three button Henley. That's a go-to for me,

00:42:23.180 right? Every guy needs a three button Henley, a great pair of dark jeans, a jacket, you know,

00:42:27.360 denim jackets are great. Leather jackets are great. Um, you know, it's, it's, it's about finding items

00:42:32.380 that really just speak to you and then, then doubling down on those items, but you don't need

00:42:36.920 a ton of them. Just, just a few, just enough. Just a few staples. Yeah. So, you know, you bring up

00:42:41.380 some interesting people like, um, Mark Zuckerberg and I think of like Bill Gates and Warren Buffett and these

00:42:47.040 ultra wealthy people. And guys are like, guys are like, see, you've seen the meme. I know you have,

00:42:51.900 it's like worth $20 billion and they don't care about what they wear. And, and I think two things,

00:42:58.240 number one, they care, right? Number one, they care. Number two, actually they can afford not to care.

00:43:04.760 They don't, they have, they have, yeah, exactly. They literally have F you money. It doesn't matter

00:43:10.200 what you say. They can, you know, and they, and they also have, have, you know, they've got the

00:43:15.940 street cred. And like you were saying about James Bond, they've got the, the, the chops to back it up.

00:43:20.740 Yes. You know, you walking into a, uh, a networking event, walking, you know, to meet somebody for the

00:43:26.340 first time. They don't know who you are. They don't know that you may or may not be, you know,

00:43:31.840 the owner of Tesla. Um, you know, these guys have, have, have, have worked really hard and have been

00:43:38.240 afforded the opportunity to, you know, basically wear whatever they want and what they want is,

00:43:44.080 is specific. And it is, is strategic oftentimes. It's funny because, so I'm going to take, I'm

00:43:50.320 going to say something that might be, you know, sacrilegious in, in our community here. Uh, let's

00:43:55.480 take a guy like Jocko. All right. Yep. Now, now he'll say, Jocko will say, I don't care. I buzz my

00:44:02.640 hair. Cause I don't care. No, no, no, no, no. Come on, man. You buzz your hair because you do

00:44:08.220 care. And we know that's why you care. So guys will interpret that like, Oh, he doesn't care.

00:44:13.240 No, he deliberately and intentionally picks that style. Just like opposite end of the spectrum,

00:44:19.120 a Jordan Peterson, who wears a nice three piece suit that communicates authority and wisdom and

00:44:27.180 knowledge. You're telling me he's not deliberate about his style. It doesn't matter what side of

00:44:33.280 the spectrum or where you sit. These guys care about the way they look and they care about the

00:44:38.700 message that it's sending and communicating to other people. Absolutely. A hundred percent. Yeah.

00:44:44.280 Jocko, he wants to look like a bad-ass. Exactly. And you know what? Look, I'm not trying to discredit

00:44:49.240 that because like you said earlier, he's got the chops to back it up, but his, his style is congruent

00:44:57.020 with his message is congruent with his lifestyle and his experience and his expertise in his chosen

00:45:04.360 profession and field. Absolutely. And I think that's what I think every guy's goal should be

00:45:09.860 is to find the congruence between what you feel that you are and, and, and the style that you

00:45:15.600 actually choose and adopt for yourself. But you're right. Jordan Peterson, same thing. If he was wearing

00:45:19.820 a, a graphic t-shirt and he was wearing jeans and a boot boots, you know, would people take him as

00:45:26.480 seriously as, as, as they do? Um, you know, maybe probably not though. Yeah. Yeah. So what,

00:45:35.600 what particular items communicate different messages? Like is, for example, is there an item

00:45:41.640 that like a suit, let's take a suit. What does that communicate versus a pair of jeans versus a button 0.80

00:45:47.460 up shirt over a t-shirt? Like, are there certain items that communicate certain things? Does that

00:45:51.880 make sense? Yeah. And I think that it's pretty obvious, right? A suit definitely does, does command

00:45:58.060 respect. The tie also. Um, it's funny because, you know, for a while, you know, when the eighties

00:46:03.340 happened, business casual sort of became like the thing, right? People didn't dress up anymore.

00:46:08.220 Everybody was like, you know, whatever, um, um, you know, sales are up, you know, money is good.

00:46:12.540 We can wear whatever we want. The tie went away, pleated khakis and, and button up shirts was,

00:46:17.160 was the norm. But then in the late nineties, two thousands, people started actually taking

00:46:22.080 care of themselves a little bit better. And, um, and then, you know, as of, as of now,

00:46:26.960 you know, people, I think really are doing a better job, paying attention and dressing up out of the

00:46:32.160 sign, out of the sign of respect, um, not only for maybe the position, but the, the themselves.

00:46:38.160 And so, you know, a suit, obviously it does, it, it sends the subliminal message that you are, 0.61

00:46:43.420 you know, reliable, responsible oftentimes. And you're a, you're a man of, of, of, of power to

00:46:49.920 some degree, but it's gotta be a good suit. It's got, I should say, it's gotta be a suit that

00:46:54.660 actually fits you well, because regardless of what you wear, it doesn't matter how amazing or 0.87

00:46:59.180 how expensive or how, whatever, if it fits you like crap, you know, it's like, you know, forget 0.82

00:47:04.560 about it. It doesn't, it doesn't do what you want. 0.94

00:47:06.720 My first suit, if I remember correctly, was like 150 bucks or something from Costco and it didn't

00:47:14.800 communicate what I was trying to communicate. And it, and obviously it showed, you know, so.

00:47:19.540 And my first, uh, five sport coats was from C pennies, right. And it was too big. And, and,

00:47:24.520 and I was wearing a big tie because I thought that that's what I, that's what I thought that I needed

00:47:29.240 to be in order to be respected and received as, you know, a, a style guy. But then as I got more

00:47:35.800 comfortable in my own skin, my, my style evolved to a more casual, you know, sort of, you know,

00:47:41.180 not, not bad boy, but that's kind of cheesy, but, but, you know, something a little bit more

00:47:46.620 low key, a little bit more edgy with, you know, just jeans, t-shirt, you know, leather jacket and

00:47:51.580 boots. That's what I wear literally every day. Right. So then what does it mean to dress appropriately?

00:47:58.420 Because, you know, you hear a lot of different things like dress for the position you're applying

00:48:02.740 for or dress one level better than you're applying for. And so like, what does it actually mean to

00:48:09.060 dress appropriately for certain occasions? Yeah. It really depends on, on, on the occasion.

00:48:14.740 One thing that I tell people is, you know, do the research. If you're going to a job, figure out what

00:48:19.100 the corporate culture is. And, and, but when you're there, um, you know, you want to make sure that

00:48:24.440 you're putting your best foot forward. Right. And, and so even though, you know, you might not

00:48:28.860 necessarily wear a suit on a, on a daily basis, you want to make sure that that is, you know,

00:48:33.620 you want to dress in a manner that is going to be respectable because, you know, a lot of times,

00:48:38.960 you know, that's as good as it gets. If you're going in for a job interview or on a date or whatever

00:48:42.780 it may be, you know, people know that that's the best that it's going to be. Everything else is going

00:48:47.580 to be sort of less than that. And so when you're going into an environment where you're not sure,

00:48:52.320 I would always err on the side of dressing up slightly as opposed to dressing down. Um, in terms of,

00:48:58.260 you know, what, what, what appropriate is, it really, really does depend on the situation,

00:49:02.980 the event that you're actually going into. But even if you're going in for a job interview at

00:49:06.600 McDonald's, wear a tie, you might not necessarily need to be in a suit, but wear a tie, show the

00:49:12.140 person that you're, you're going to meet, that you respect the situation and the position that

00:49:16.340 you're going for and, or into. And, um, and it does send the message that you are respecting

00:49:21.640 yourself as well. But that's, it's kind of a hard question to answer, Ryan, without a specific,

00:49:26.240 without that scenario. You know, it's a good point. So I, so I, my background is retail

00:49:30.720 management and I'd have people come in and we'd interview those individuals and see if they were

00:49:34.340 a good fit for the team. And, and, you know, although I had individuals come in who were

00:49:38.840 overdressed, I remember vividly thinking, I appreciate the effort. You know, they were overdressed

00:49:46.060 for the position. Cause I worked at buckle, which is a more of a fashionable, you know, clothing

00:49:50.840 store for men and women. And they'd come in in a suit and you were the guys who did the

00:49:54.740 jeans with the pocket stuff. Look, I never bought a pair. This is, this is your fault.

00:50:00.980 No, no. Look, whenever anybody came in and said, I want some, some affliction or a true

00:50:06.500 legend or affliction, I said, let me show you some different things. Okay. So it wasn't

00:50:11.540 me. All right. It wasn't me. Anyways, I'd have these individuals come in. That's funny.

00:50:16.180 And, uh, and although they may have been overdressed for what we were doing, I always appreciated it.

00:50:21.840 And then I remember vividly, I had a guy come in sharp, man, just super sharp. Seemed like he'd be

00:50:27.080 a great salesperson. He came in, he had baggy Wranglers on, they were all tore up and dirty.

00:50:33.160 He literally had cow shit on his boots. And I just thought to myself, dude, if you would've just 0.99

00:50:38.240 washed the boots off and conditioned them, put on a new pair of Wranglers, I would have been way

00:50:44.600 more apt to bring you on than somebody who comes in. And obviously, obviously you don't care.

00:50:49.820 I'd rather somebody at least care and go a little too far than not care enough.

00:50:56.460 Absolutely. Absolutely. So you really don't think Ryan, that a lot of your audiences is,

00:51:00.820 is, is concerned with style. See, I think they are, they just might not acknowledge it.

00:51:05.300 They're not supposed to be. Okay. Do you know what I'm saying? Like,

00:51:10.280 I don't know why. I mean, when you think about, when you think about our grandfathers,

00:51:14.260 right, our grandfathers were well-dressed men, right? A lot of them were, I mean, you look back

00:51:20.460 in time, men throughout history have paid attention to what they're wearing and have,

00:51:26.120 have, have dressed with purpose and intention. And so, I mean, this goes back to middle ages. I mean,

00:51:32.100 you know, men cared. And then all of a sudden it got to a point where it's like, oh, men shouldn't

00:51:37.440 care. I don't know when this happened or why, but, but, you know, you look at, you know, TV shows

00:51:42.520 like Mad Men or, or, you know, back in the sixties, the seventies, like guys care. I guess it was the

00:51:48.340 sixties that, that changed things when things went, when all those damn hippies started. 1.00

00:51:53.420 Say whatever, burn your bras. Actually, they were dressed in a specific manner as well, just to show 0.99

00:51:58.160 the world, like what they and the counterculture was all about. And so everybody.

00:52:03.020 Well, look, here's the deal. The more you say you don't care, the more you actually care.

00:52:08.640 So you talk about the hippies, right? Oh, we don't care. We don't care. Burn the bras, 1.00

00:52:11.880 grow hairy armpits, do whatever. That means you actually care. You're trying to show the world 0.99

00:52:18.100 something. And so your uniform, like you said earlier, is showing the world that you don't

00:52:23.200 care, which by definition means that you actually do. Exactly. So we just flipped it all around.

00:52:28.220 Exactly. Good. Good point, Ryan. Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's funny because I think a

00:52:33.000 guys like George Washington, you know, I've read, I don't know, three or four biographies on George

00:52:37.720 Washington. And he was very, very adamant about the way that he presented himself and the uniforms

00:52:44.460 that he wore and how they looked. In fact, one of his major criticisms with the armies is that these

00:52:51.900 were a bunch of ragtag farmers who didn't look and dress the part. You take Alexander the Great, 1.00

00:52:59.260 who actually was one of the first individuals to make shaving your beard, a trendy pop culture type

00:53:08.080 thing. And this was a warrior who dominated dozens, if not hundreds of civilizations and,

00:53:15.680 and tribes across, you know, across the continent. These were individuals who were fully capable,

00:53:21.960 but also knew the importance of the way that they looked and how it fostered credibility and influence

00:53:28.940 with the people they were trying to lead. A hundred percent. I think we just solved the

00:53:33.640 problem, Ryan. It's all over. Everybody's going to go out and hire a style coach now.

00:53:39.660 There it is.

00:53:42.940 You know, and here's something else. Go ahead.

00:53:45.580 Real quick. Like there are, if somebody is not sure where to start and they are, you know,

00:53:51.420 just, they want to, they want to step a little bit outside of their box. There are a lot of services

00:53:56.620 out there online. And that's the other thing. You don't even need to go shopping anymore. If you,

00:54:01.500 if you want to, you can just order things online, free shipping, you try it, you like it, you don't

00:54:05.780 like it, you send it back. And so shopping has never been easier, but there are also other services

00:54:10.840 out there. One off the top of my head that I love is called Stitch Fix. And you know, where,

00:54:16.380 where you sign up and you basically tell them exactly what your preferences are. And they have,

00:54:21.280 they've done a really good job. Some of these companies have done an incredible job really

00:54:26.220 having like this quiz and you're working one-on-one where somebody, you know, you're filling out this

00:54:32.100 quiz, talking about your body type, talking about what clothes you like, what you don't like,

00:54:35.660 what you'd be comfortable wearing. And then you've got somebody that is actively taking

00:54:40.100 all of this information and then choosing things and sending them to you based on your

00:54:45.120 specifications and preferences. You get it. You see if you like it, if you do great, if not,

00:54:49.920 you send it back and they are doing it in a manner that it's going to basically like match.

00:54:55.160 And so that, you know, and make sure that, that you're looking, you know, good and you're not

00:54:59.180 wearing something crazy, but there are a lot of services out there that are, that are helpful

00:55:03.180 for guys. If they're not interested a in shopping or not sure what to do, let somebody or the expert

00:55:09.020 help you out. Well, I think that's one of the issues is that I'm not interested, you know,

00:55:14.340 or I don't know what to do. I think that's one of the issues. Also, I think another issue is,

00:55:18.220 you know, I just don't have the time, right? I'm consumed with work and I'm putting in overtime

00:55:22.740 and I've, and I've got these other activities and things I'm engaged in. So when it comes to

00:55:28.200 solutions, like you're talking about that eliminates a lot of the time of having to go

00:55:32.120 drive for an hour and then go try everything on and then be annoyed by the salesperson and then

00:55:38.460 nothing fits or you don't like it. And then you just wasted an hour of your day or two hours of

00:55:42.940 your day or longer. Uh, so this actually helps with the time commitment as well, which I think

00:55:47.960 for me personally is very, very important. And I live in a pretty rural area. So if I wanted to

00:55:54.100 actually go into anywhere that had clothes, it would be an hour, hour and a half one way. So

00:55:59.820 there's three hours of commute. There's another hour or two of trying things on. It's just a waste

00:56:04.120 of time for me. Yep. Yep. And so this solves that problem as well.

00:56:07.820 How do you describe personally what you do for work? Like wrap that up for me and tell

00:56:14.900 me how you describe that. What I do, I'm an entrepreneur basically for, for work. I don't,

00:56:21.180 I don't do the, uh, the style consulting anymore. That was my, uh, my, my job or what I chose to do

00:56:26.980 after I got out of, uh, the fitness center, I had a fitness center that failed. And so I started,

00:56:32.260 uh, I was like, okay, what can I do that? I enjoy doing. And, um, at the time, this was back

00:56:37.500 in 2006, the only real resource out there was, um, was like Esquire magazine and GQ. And I realized

00:56:44.920 I'm like, you know, this, there's a, there's a whole group of guys out there that don't read

00:56:48.680 these magazines that don't care. They don't, they just want to know like what looks good on them

00:56:53.600 because they want to, you know, go on a date or they want to, you know, impress their boss or

00:56:57.180 whatever it may be. And so I decided to try and start an image consulting firm. One thing led to

00:57:02.460 another, my wife gave me a video camera in 2008. I started posting YouTube videos and that was when

00:57:07.860 sort of everything changed. And a lot of my services that at the time I were off, I was offering

00:57:12.500 to guys who would fly in from around the country to work with me for the day. And, and I'd take

00:57:16.640 them shopping. I'd take them to get their haircut. Um, you know, they, and it's funny because they

00:57:21.860 felt more comfortable around me being a guy, just another guy that just happens to know more about,

00:57:26.980 you know, jeans and, and, you know, footwear as opposed to football. And it's just always been

00:57:31.860 something that I've been interested in. And, um, and so that actually took off, but then the YouTube

00:57:36.880 thing sort of, it, it led me in a different direction. And so, um, from there I started some

00:57:42.640 other auxiliary businesses like a hair, a hair product company, an advertising agency, a skincare

00:57:48.240 company, a sunglass company, um, some others that didn't work out that I, that have failed. And so, uh,

00:57:53.720 but yeah, I'm an, I'm an entrepreneur. I've, I've been an entrepreneur ever since I can remember.

00:57:58.420 That's all right. I like that, you know, and no, I like that. And, and one of the things I really

00:58:03.780 appreciate about what you do and being able to follow you and know you over the past almost six

00:58:07.920 years now is to see your ability to adapt and evolve and pivot and reach out to new spaces.

00:58:14.860 Some works, you know, some don't. Um, I, I think more guys can take a lot of lessons from that because

00:58:21.560 we get stuck in these paths and we think, okay, this is what I have to do. You know, if I were to rewind

00:58:26.220 six years ago and you said, I'd be having conversations like this and doing what we do,

00:58:31.180 no way would I ever believe that, but I just took one step and then another and another and

00:58:36.600 another. And some things I'm like, yeah, I don't like that. Or that didn't work. And then you pivot

00:58:41.180 and you adjust. And that's what I've seen you do. And it's very inspiring. And it's helped me

00:58:45.620 propel my own business forward in a way that's been meaningful as the climate changes, as I mature,

00:58:52.300 as I have different new interests. It's, it's just seems to be a pretty good way to run

00:58:59.020 a business, let alone your life. Yeah, no, I agree. And it's something where I, I think I

00:59:06.860 mentioned this the other day, Ryan, that if you would have told me like 12 years ago that I'd be 0.97

00:59:10.940 making YouTube videos and, and selling hair product, I would have punched you in the face because 0.58

00:59:15.840 from the age of 12, the only thing I ever wanted to do was own a fitness center. And, um, and so,

00:59:21.120 you know, the, the, and then when that was taken away, I had to file bankruptcy. It was just a big

00:59:26.360 nightmare. Um, at that point was my lowest point. I was driving a beer cart and I, and the worst part

00:59:31.640 about, about that time in my life, this is back in 2006. It wasn't that I was broke and bankrupt and

00:59:37.660 driving a beer cart. It's that I didn't know what plan B was, you know, for, and for me, the type of

00:59:43.600 person I am, I get tunnel vision and I focus on like one thing and that's, you know, all my attention,

00:59:48.600 all of my thoughts, all of my passion goes towards that. Well, when that was taken away from me, I

00:59:53.400 didn't know what was next. And so that was for me, the worst thing that, that I could possibly endure

00:59:58.940 was not knowing what my, my dream was anymore and what was going to mean success. And so what I tell

01:00:04.760 people, and the one thing that I've learned, if, if not anything else is that success doesn't always

01:00:09.740 look like what you think it should or what you want it to. And you've just got to be smart enough

01:00:14.740 to allow the universe or your faith or whomever to sort of open your eyes to the opportunities that

01:00:21.140 are presenting themselves that you need to sort of scratch, you know, and pull that thread and,

01:00:26.580 and, and, and understand that sometimes, you know, even though you may want something really bad with

01:00:33.300 all of your heart, it might not be what ultimately is in the cards for you. And, and it's okay to adjust

01:00:39.940 and adapt and change and pivot. Like you were mentioning Ryan. So take me back to your beer

01:00:46.200 cart days. You know, you're, you're, you're, you're doing that. Your wife hands you a camera.

01:00:51.300 Why would she do that? Like, what did she see? The camera? That's what I did. She, she just didn't 0.62

01:00:55.760 know what to get me. And, and so what do you guess? So it was just a gift. Is that what it was?

01:00:58.940 It was just, it was literally a gift that sat in the box for a year before I opened it. I thought,

01:01:04.120 I'm like, Oh, she wants to film and get freaky. I'm like, this is cool. Uh, that wasn't the,

01:01:08.180 that wasn't the case. I'm fully into this thing. Yeah, exactly. I'm like, yeah, video camera.

01:01:12.260 Awesome. And so now I, I'm not a tech savvy individual. And so that camera sat in the box.

01:01:17.140 She just didn't know what to get me for Christmas. And so it literally sat in the box until I believe

01:01:21.740 it was around August when I was like, I'm going to see if I can figure out how to make a video

01:01:25.560 and post it on YouTube. I had only been on YouTube, uh, probably three or four times.

01:01:30.040 This is back. Was it fitness related? Is that what it was? No, it was style related. It was style

01:01:34.200 related by this point. I was, I was out of the fitness. I'm like, get me away from this.

01:01:38.440 And, uh, it was, uh, it was, it was the image consulting. Now at that point I was still

01:01:43.320 moonlighting as a personal trainer, going to people's homes just to make ends meet.

01:01:47.400 But, um, but yeah, no, it was, it was, let me put some videos out there and see if,

01:01:51.580 if, uh, if there's an audience for this. And honestly, it was interesting because I didn't know

01:01:55.700 that there was going to really be an audience, but I posted that first video

01:01:58.800 where I was dressed up in my black velvet jacket and my big knot. And I was standing there and,

01:02:04.200 and I'm like, hello, my name is Aaron Marino from Alpha M image consulting.

01:02:07.560 And I want to talk about style. If you've got questions, let me know and we'll, we'll answer

01:02:11.820 them. Well, I got a question from a guy who was the heavier set guy. He said, Hey, I'm a big dude.

01:02:16.480 I don't know what pants I should buy. And it was at that moment that I was like, this is it.

01:02:20.940 I finally felt validated. I felt like I had a voice and I felt like I mattered again.

01:02:25.680 And so that was what just kept me going for the past, you know, since 2008 when I started. And,

01:02:32.100 and I don't think there'll be a time, at least none that I can think of that. I won't be,

01:02:36.480 you know, to some degree posting videos or content online.

01:02:40.360 I mean, you're so good at it. You know, you're so, you're so good at it. And I know you'd probably

01:02:44.540 say, you know, you develop that over years and years and years of articulating it and probably

01:02:49.120 thinking about that, that first video you did, you probably don't even want to think about it.

01:02:53.200 It's not up anywhere. Yeah. Mine is actually my first video is up. I left it up. Cause I'm like,

01:02:59.380 don't guys, please don't go back and watch that video. It is there. Just don't go back and watch

01:03:05.120 it. Okay. But I actually had a very similar experience when I started podcasting. I was

01:03:10.820 doing a podcast for my financial planning practice. And I thought to myself, I'm going to put this out

01:03:15.420 there, see how it does. Podcasting was kind of cool at the time, but I thought to myself,

01:03:19.840 no self-respecting, educated, intelligent doctor is ever going to reach out to a financial advisor

01:03:26.600 that he heard on a podcast about his financial services. And sure enough, man, I put that podcast

01:03:32.160 out there and I had, I remember a pediatric physician from, uh, from Pennsylvania reached

01:03:38.520 out to me and he called me up and he told me all the things he wanted in disability insurance.

01:03:42.640 And nobody knows what they want. Disability insurance. Cause who thinks about that? 1.00

01:03:46.300 And I told him, I said, man, you've got like a list of features that you want in your disability

01:03:51.820 insurance. Nobody knows that you've obviously been shopping. He's like, no, no, no. I haven't

01:03:57.180 been shopping. I just listened to your podcast. And this is what you told me I needed. And it was like

01:04:02.020 a light bulb, man. It was a light bulb moment. And it just hit me that podcasting was the way to go.

01:04:10.340 And I took a step and then another step. And then eventually I closed that podcast down and

01:04:14.440 started a different one. And you just never know the path you're going to go unless you're willing

01:04:19.080 to take that first step, which sounds like is what you did. Absolutely. You know, for me,

01:04:24.200 it's, it's about the fear. I don't really feel once you fail monumentally, like I did with my fitness

01:04:29.980 center, you know, nothing else, you know, I literally had everything other than my health

01:04:34.960 stripped away from me. And, um, and so once you are there, you know, taking risks, you know,

01:04:41.520 it's like, what, what are you going to do? Like, I've, I've been, I've been there as low as I can

01:04:45.320 get. Like, what are you going to do? You're going to make me broke. I've been there. No big deal.

01:04:49.300 Um, once you sort of face that and realize that, you know what, you survived, you can move forward.

01:04:55.520 Um, you know, risks don't scare me anymore, but, but, but regret does. And so at this stage of my life,

01:05:01.680 I I'm willing to throw it at the wall and see if it sticks. If it does great, if it doesn't,

01:05:05.760 okay. You know, I am not that, you know, my ego is not that fragile that I am, you know,

01:05:11.620 putting all of my eggs in one baskets and feel like it's a, it's a, it's a indicator of, of my

01:05:17.440 ability or my strengths or my intelligence. It's just, Hey, I tried it. If it didn't work out,

01:05:21.800 be quick enough to realize that, okay, this is not a good direction and move on. But at this stage

01:05:26.660 of my life, I just fear failure. I fear regret as opposed to failure. Failure. Yes, it sucks.

01:05:31.420 And it sucks no matter how successful you get. It sucks whether or not it's your career. It sucks 0.99

01:05:36.980 whether or not it's a business, whether or not it's a relate failure is horrible, but the alternative 0.98

01:05:42.280 for me, not trying and thinking and being 10 years down the road and looking at other people that

01:05:47.820 have done something that maybe I thought of like, that's what scares the hell out of me. And that's

01:05:51.580 what keeps me willing to try things. Even if the risk is I lose some money, I lose a few months

01:05:58.360 of my life focusing on something because what's the alternative, uh, the best case scenario could

01:06:03.400 happen. And you, I never in a million years would have thought that I would be as happy,

01:06:08.720 fulfilled and successful as I am sitting here talking to you today. And it was all because

01:06:13.280 my dream collapsed and I was not smart enough, but I was willing to take another stab at something

01:06:19.720 that I didn't necessarily know what the outcome was going to be. So be curious and, and try

01:06:25.440 things. That's, I guess the, the, uh, the takeaway from that, right?

01:06:29.220 Yeah, that's powerful. I mean, look, if you're going to try something, look, you can always go

01:06:33.880 back to your shitty life. That's easy. That's it. You can always go back to that. Yeah. That'll 1.00

01:06:39.140 always be there for you. But you just never know what, what stands in the doorway that you're not

01:06:44.180 willing to take or not willing to open up. What was the reason for the, uh, the fitness center?

01:06:49.840 What, what, what was the, the, the failure behind that? What, what happened there?

01:06:54.520 The failure was multiple. Like there was a lot of reasons why that failed. Um, you know,

01:07:00.060 that, that's a really long story, but, but in a nutshell, um, we, uh, my business partner and I

01:07:07.680 tried to expand, we had a little personal training studio and we had this idea that, um, we wanted to

01:07:13.720 create a group fitness facility where we were going to have classes for, you know, seniors for parents and

01:07:18.980 their kids. And, you know, for little kids, the class was called like muscle sprouts. It was,

01:07:23.840 it was a really good idea. And if it was started by any other people other than myself and my business

01:07:28.260 partner, I think it would have been very successful, but unfortunately it was, uh, she was a bit older 0.98

01:07:33.420 than I was. I helped her lose a hundred pounds. Um, when I worked in a nutrition store and, uh, and so 0.69

01:07:39.260 she wanted to help other people. And so we ended up, you know, starting a personal training studio.

01:07:43.380 And so we had this idea for this group fitness facility. We ended up having to raise money

01:07:47.640 in order to do that. Uh, long story short, there was one of our investors and my business partner

01:07:52.600 had a very, very big falling out in disagreement and he had a lot more money than we did.

01:07:57.660 And so, you know, one, anytime lawyers get involved and, um, you know, it was just a really bad scene.

01:08:04.840 And so by the end of things, I was literally taking money off my credit cards to, to pay my staff. And,

01:08:09.900 and if I could have sold my kidneys, I would have done that both of them. Like I, there was nothing I

01:08:15.160 would have done or sacrificed in order to keep that going. I just had nothing else. And, and the

01:08:19.860 writing was kind of on the wall and, and it was time to pack things up and move on.

01:08:24.340 How did you make ends meet between the fitness center failing and you picking up with the style

01:08:31.000 consulting? Yeah, it was, it was, it was me driving a beer cart. Like I said, I was literally driving a

01:08:36.440 beer cart on weekends at a country club. And that was, you want to talk about a, a blow to your ego,

01:08:41.920 right? I hear a lot of people like, Oh, I can't get a job. I can't get a job. You don't want it

01:08:46.680 bad enough. You can get a job. Exactly. You can get a job. You just don't want one. And so I,

01:08:51.940 I needed to do something on the weekends and, um, and I wasn't qualified to be a bartender

01:08:56.460 because I'd never worked in a restaurant. And so I, I saw that there was a country club that was hiring

01:09:01.860 for weekend, you know, beer cart. I was the only guy. It was all women. It was all like 19 year old 1.00

01:09:06.940 women. I was a 30, you know, at that time, I guess like a 32 year old guy who had a business

01:09:12.460 that was failing, you know, that, that ended up, you know, having to, having to go and do what you

01:09:18.180 had to do just because you need to make ends meet. And, and for me, it was worth doing that as opposed

01:09:24.660 to the other alternative, which was going to my then girlfriend, my now wife and saying, you've got

01:09:29.700 to support me. That wasn't an option for me. So I would have done whatever it took. And so I did that

01:09:34.900 for about, you know, eight months. And then I started personal training. Uh, that was my,

01:09:39.560 my old, you know, profession. And so I was doing that and, and, and that's how I made ends meet.

01:09:45.980 It's awesome, man. You know, I know you don't need any sort of approval or validation from me.

01:09:50.680 I always do. Right. Yeah. I mean, that's what you're waiting for, right? Well, you know, look,

01:09:55.200 if that's what you're waiting for, it's been a miserable five years for you. I'm sure.

01:09:58.760 Look, what, what I wanted to say is that, you know, I can really respect and appreciate that.

01:10:05.620 I think there's a lot of guys who have, you know, their pride is so swelled up that they're just not

01:10:11.740 willing to do what it is they need to do. And, and they're willing to be losers for the sake of

01:10:17.880 their pride and their arrogance. And so when I see a guy like yourself, who's been ultra successful

01:10:22.420 at multiple different ventures, be willing to share and talk about how you weren't always there,

01:10:29.040 but you did what you could do and what you needed to do to make ends meet. I really,

01:10:33.180 really respect that for sure. Yeah. It's, you know, it's just one of those things where,

01:10:38.120 you know, the men that are willing to do what they need to do when things aren't glamorous,

01:10:42.320 they aren't sexy, you know, but they're willing to show up and put in the work when they're not 1.00

01:10:46.660 getting the rewards, when they're not getting the accolades, you know, those are the guys that are

01:10:50.340 ultimately going to figure it out. I am a firm believer. And I honestly feel like, you know,

01:10:55.260 growing up, you know, without a lot of means or being, you know, fairly poor. I think that's also

01:11:00.680 can be an advantage. It can also be a disadvantage though, because, you know, it really boils down to

01:11:05.260 mindset. You see people that grow up in bad situations or poor and use that as an excuse that

01:11:10.180 why they can or why they shouldn't or why they won't. And they won't, they won't ever. But there are

01:11:14.480 the other people that see that and say, I'm going to figure this out. I'm going to be successful

01:11:19.420 despite where I am and, and where I started, I should say. And so, yeah, I mean, it's really

01:11:25.420 about mindset and realizing that you're incredibly powerful and can accomplish anything as long as

01:11:30.520 you get out of your own way. And I think that's really something that a lot of people need to do

01:11:35.420 is shut up, sit down, do the work and get out of your own way and don't expect somebody else to 0.99

01:11:39.600 hand you shit because they won't. That's a great place to wrap up, Aaron. I want to, I want to tell you 1.00

01:11:45.660 again, I appreciate the friendship that we've had, what you're doing from leading from the front and

01:11:49.620 how you run your business. Um, how do guys connect with you if they want to learn more about what

01:11:53.140 you're doing specifically? Yeah. Yeah. Easy. Uh, just go to alpha m.com that can give you a rundown

01:11:58.020 of all my businesses and, and a place to contact me if you've got any questions or anything you want

01:12:03.500 to throw at. Right on brother. We'll sync it all up. So the guys know where to go again. Appreciate

01:12:08.380 your friendship. Appreciate what you're doing leading from the front and I appreciate it just for

01:12:12.820 everybody out there, just for everybody listening. Um, I got the, I got the play. I had the pleasure

01:12:17.960 to meet Ryan a long time ago when he was just starting this and to watch the movement that you

01:12:23.820 have created and the passion. And, you know, I see a lot of guys throughout the years with this

01:12:28.680 conference that, that we keep referencing. Um, you know, I've, I've seen thousands of guys,

01:12:33.860 everybody there shows up with amazing intentions. They've got a plan. They're going to do this.

01:12:38.680 They're going to do that. You leave the event and you're super charged up oftentimes,

01:12:42.140 probably very similar to some of your events, Ryan, right? When you come and you're immersed

01:12:46.520 in this environment, it's like, it's powerful. And, and, and it's the people though, that are

01:12:51.900 able to harness that and, and actually continue that when they're not around everybody who's

01:12:57.580 patting them on the back and saying, great job, you're amazing. Which is why I think the iron

01:13:01.200 council that you're running is, is so important because it immerses you sort of continuously in

01:13:05.880 this, this, this, this air of, you know, positive, you know, role models and, and nurturing.

01:13:11.200 It helps people nurture their, I think the, the, the direction that they're on, but to watch you,

01:13:16.800 you have been more successful than 99.9% of the other people that I have come across.

01:13:22.400 And it was strictly because of your, not strictly, but your discipline, your willingness to roll up 0.69

01:13:27.360 your sleeves and figure shit out has been amazing to watch. And to see what it's become

01:13:31.580 is, is, is just all inspiring. And so congratulations to you for all of you,

01:13:37.780 all of your success and it is well-deserved, but hard earned. And so, you know, I don't think that

01:13:44.160 any of us, we don't necessarily deserve things, but the people that are good people that put positive

01:13:48.840 messages out there that aren't looking to screw anybody out of anything. I think these are the

01:13:52.660 people that, that I'm rooting for. And I've been rooting for you from day one. And so thank you for

01:13:57.860 all that you do, man. Thank you. You know, you alluded to something, um, earlier you said,

01:14:02.540 I can't remember exactly what you said, but you know, too, too dumb or something like that. You 0.99

01:14:06.460 said earlier to do anything different. And I feel like sometimes that's me and you, maybe it's just

01:14:11.060 like, we're more apes than anything else. And it's like, just, just keep doing it. You know, we're,

01:14:16.940 we're, we're too dumb to do anything different. And so we just keep going. And then eventually it all 0.98

01:14:21.420 works out, you know, really stubborn. We're really stubborn. We have the ability,

01:14:27.740 to focus and, and keep doing repetitive tasks without, without getting bored. And at the same

01:14:32.920 way with like diet and workouts. And I mean, it's about doing it when it's not sexy and, uh,

01:14:38.740 and eventually, you know, hopefully you'll figure it out. But Ryan, thank you so much for having me

01:14:43.180 on. It was a pleasure. And, uh, as always, it was great to see you, man. Appreciate it, brother.

01:14:49.520 Gentlemen, there you go. My conversation with the one and only Aaron Marino. I hope you enjoyed it.

01:14:53.240 Obviously Aaron's got a ton of energy. He's very excited about what he's doing. Um, this isn't

01:14:58.100 something I was always excited about, but the more I talk with Aaron, uh, and, and learn how I can use

01:15:04.020 my clothing and dress and style and appearance, uh, as a tool to help me get more of what I want

01:15:10.080 in my relationship, professional endeavors, every facet of my life. Uh, the more I see how valuable

01:15:15.320 this is. And I hope that you are taking this seriously as well, because I know a lot of guys will

01:15:19.820 tune this out immediately because we've been told that, you know, it's, it's feminine or something

01:15:23.620 to, uh, be aware of the way that we look, but that's just not the case. It's, it's a tool

01:15:29.880 and it's a powerful tool if you know how to use it correctly. So if you want to learn more about

01:15:33.980 what Aaron's doing, follow him. Uh, I think he's most active or very active anyways on Instagram,

01:15:38.900 hit him up there. Uh, also YouTube, like I said, he's got over 6 million YouTube subscribers,

01:15:43.840 just an unreal amount of people following him. Uh, and then connect with me on Instagram too,

01:15:48.220 while you're there and let us know what you thought about the show, the goods, the bads,

01:15:51.220 the indifference, everything else. And we'll continue this conversation on the socials, uh,

01:15:56.340 guys, we'll be back tomorrow for an ask me anything with Kip Sorensen. And then of course

01:16:00.780 your Friday field notes, I've got two very, very powerful interviews lined up. I mean,

01:16:05.880 all of them are powerful, but these are going to be exceptionally good in the coming, uh, I would

01:16:09.380 say weeks or month or so. So please make sure that you subscribe, leave yourself a rating and

01:16:14.500 review that goes a very long way in promoting the visibility of the show. And I don't ask a whole

01:16:19.560 lot, but that helps me. And it helps get this mission out to more men who need to hear it and

01:16:23.720 better society at large. All right, guys, that's all I've got. Hope you enjoyed the podcast. We'll

01:16:28.860 see you tomorrow for the ask me anything until then go out there, take action and become the man you

01:16:33.500 are meant to be. Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of

01:16:38.540 your life and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.

Order of Man - September 22, 2020

How Improved Style Improves Your Life ｜ AARON MARINO

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