Order of Man

00:00:00.000 The way you tap into the matter that represents the six inches between your ears matters.

00:00:05.680 The fact is, all of us have the same amount of time in the day.

00:00:10.040 Yeah, sure, some people are born more intelligent or wealthy or connected than others,

00:00:16.180 but can you level the playing field?

00:00:18.240 That's the only question that matters.

00:00:20.560 My guest today, John Asherath, believes that you can.

00:00:23.860 He's made it his life's mission to show you how.

00:00:26.440 Today, we talk about finding out if you're interested or committed in the difference,

00:00:33.060 how to turn your possibility into predictability using proven systems,

00:00:38.360 how much time you really need to commit each day to improving, and that answer might shock you,

00:00:43.860 breaking free from the expectations of others, and finding what John calls their neuroplasticity switch.

00:00:50.840 You're a man of action.

00:00:51.900 You live life to the fullest, embrace your fears, and boldly chart your own path.

00:00:56.700 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time, every time.

00:01:01.120 You are not easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong.

00:01:06.220 This is your life.

00:01:07.320 This is who you are.

00:01:08.720 This is who you will become.

00:01:10.460 At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.

00:01:15.400 Gentlemen, welcome to the Order of Man podcast.

00:01:19.900 Going forward 10 years strong now.

00:01:22.380 So weird and exciting and optimistic when I say that we've been going for 10 years.

00:01:27.700 As of this month, I think we're about, I don't know, 10, 11 days away from our anniversary,

00:01:33.000 and I just want to thank you for tuning in for 10 years and being in this movement to reclaim and restore masculinity.

00:01:39.240 I wish that I could tell you that I had some grand design, but the reality is I kind of fumbled and stumbled my way into creating a movement that would span and reach millions and millions of people and span across the entire world at this point.

00:01:57.000 So I want to thank you for doing your part, but most importantly, just want to thank you for showing up for yourself, for your family, your friends, your colleagues, your coworkers, your communities, your states, your countries, and just being a better man in general.

00:02:10.940 That is what this whole mission has been, to reclaim and restore masculinity in this society that is increasingly dismissive and mocking of it.

00:02:20.120 Guys, I've got a very good podcast for you today.

00:02:22.920 Before I get into that, just also want to do a thank you to my friends over at Montana Knife Company.

00:02:28.000 There are few, relatively few, there's a lot of people, but relatively few people who have wholeheartedly believed in this mission to reclaim and restore masculinity.

00:02:37.380 And I've had some good friends and good sponsors take care of this show and make sure that we can continue to bring you these conversations.

00:02:45.660 But Montana Knife Company is at the top of that list.

00:02:48.540 They're making all of their knives 100% in America.

00:02:52.920 And I think they're just scratching the surface on what could be with regards to American manufacturing.

00:02:59.940 Bringing American manufacturing back, building great tools, building knives, and I believe every man needs to have a knife.

00:03:07.560 In fact, you can't see this right now, but I just pulled out my everyday carry,

00:03:11.400 which happens to be a Montana Knife Company fixed blade knife that I carry around on my person.

00:03:16.680 And if you're looking for something solid, 100% made in America, go to MontanaKnifeCompany.com and use the code ORDEROFMAN.

00:03:25.820 That'll save you some money and let them know that you found us or found them over here with us.

00:03:31.200 Again, that's MontanaKnifeCompany.com.

00:03:34.340 Use the code ORDEROFMAN.

00:03:36.100 All right, I'm going to put my knife away.

00:03:37.740 Don't need it right now.

00:03:38.540 I want to introduce you to my guest.

00:03:40.640 His name is John Assaraf.

00:03:42.600 He is a world-renowned mindset and small business growth expert who has appeared numerous times on people like Larry King Live, Anderson Cooper, Ellen DeGeneres.

00:03:55.740 He has built a multi-million dollar company.

00:04:00.800 In fact, he's built five multi-million dollar companies.

00:04:03.200 He's written 14 books, including two New York Times bestselling author type books and appeared in 14 movies, including The Secret.

00:04:15.080 If you're as old as me, you know what that one is.

00:04:18.100 Quest for Success with Richard Branson and also the Dalai Lama.

00:04:21.840 He is passionate, very passionate in helping people tap into their brains.

00:04:26.180 Superpower, so they shatter limitations and achieve their life's biggest goals and dreams.

00:04:31.700 He also founded MyNeroGym.com, which has revolutionized mindset coaching and mental fitness training.

00:04:39.300 And in his powerful InnerSize app, which I started using over the past couple of weeks, he is instrumental in helping people rewire their brains for unstoppable success.

00:04:52.100 John, so good to see you, man.

00:04:53.440 I'm really grateful that you could join us.

00:04:55.400 I've been a longtime follower, and I know you've been doing this for a long time.

00:05:00.140 I know you've been on some pretty prolific podcasts and been in the media and helped a lot of people.

00:05:06.600 And I'm very excited to have this discussion about doing the inner work as opposed to where I tend to focus and naturally gravitate towards the outer work.

00:05:16.940 Thank you, Ryan.

00:05:17.840 And most of us learn to do the outer work, right?

00:05:22.120 It's, you know, if you were raised by parents, you know, back in the, you know, 70s, 80s, 90s, whatever it is, like work hard, you know, put in your hard work and you'll do well in life.

00:05:34.340 And so we're so used to playing the game, you know, with what we can hear, see, smell, taste and touch and then do the work.

00:05:41.700 And I think hard work is good, but I also think that there's some other things that we can do to make what we want to achieve a little bit easier, maybe a little bit smarter.

00:05:54.700 Sometimes I wonder, and I wouldn't say I'm a skeptic as much as it is easy for me to gravitate towards what I can, to your point earlier, see, touch, smell, feel, taste, etc.

00:06:06.500 So I'm not a skeptic necessarily, but sometimes I often wonder how much effort we put into this and does it come at the expense of getting work done?

00:06:18.080 I think a lot of guys might feel that way, you know, if you tell them to, and I don't want to put words in your mouth, so please don't take this literally.

00:06:25.680 But I think what a lot of guys experience is, like, what do you want me to do?

00:06:29.940 Sit around and, like, think about things and, like, spend a bunch of time, like, worrying about what's going on inside when I have work to do.

00:06:37.860 I think a lot of guys experience that, and I certainly have as well. I'm sure you have too.

00:06:41.720 Yeah. So I think, like, perspective is really important, right?

00:06:47.900 And so I think, you know, we all have our perception of stuff, and then we have our beliefs, right, that we have a belief about why we should do this or not do that, and that's all great.

00:06:58.540 But there's also different perspectives, and I'll give you an example of a, you know, perspective shift.

00:07:04.920 We could take a look at water, and we could say, great, this is, you know, just liquid water, big deal.

00:07:10.640 And we go, okay, but isn't that water made up of two molecules of hydrogen and one of oxygen?

00:07:18.800 And when you use water, you know, you can use it to drink, but let's say we looked at water a little bit differently, and we heated the water.

00:07:28.180 At 211 degrees, water is very hot. Maybe you like your tea that hot.

00:07:33.720 But one little extra degree produces steam, which means that the molecules, the hydrogen and the oxygen, are actually vibrating.

00:07:42.940 They break apart, they vibrate at a higher level, and now the exact same elements move a train.

00:07:53.100 You go, oh, oh, okay, that makes sense.

00:07:56.400 And so we go, well, what does that have to do with me?

00:07:58.760 And I say, okay, well, we can work hard, and we've all heard of, but you can work smart.

00:08:07.780 But let's understand also that we are all creatures of habit.

00:08:13.600 And when we work hard, is it necessarily, and this is a question, the best thing we should be doing?

00:08:22.480 And when you talk about thinking, thinking happens to be one of the most powerful mental attributes of a human being.

00:08:36.320 But if most people said what they were actually thinking, they would be speechless.

00:08:43.240 Other people would, too, if they knew what I was thinking on a daily basis.

00:08:46.680 Yeah, most people don't think.

00:08:48.360 They confuse thinking with thoughts.

00:08:53.440 And there's a big thing.

00:08:54.720 Thoughts are more intuitive?

00:08:55.840 Is that what you're saying?

00:08:56.540 Thinking seems a little bit more intentional, but thoughts, are they just more intuitive, and there's not much process behind it?

00:09:01.940 Or what's the differentiation between the two?

00:09:04.620 The average person has 6,200 thoughts a day.

00:09:08.680 And the average person has 80% of those thoughts are actually negative, disempowering thoughts.

00:09:17.160 These are some new research in the last couple of years.

00:09:20.020 So the average person has negative thoughts, let's say 80%, maybe for people watching or listening, it's 70% or 50%.

00:09:27.480 Great, you still have those thoughts that are percolating, you know, from your subconscious mind, from your long-term memory center.

00:09:35.760 But those thoughts produce neurochemicals.

00:09:41.580 Neurochemicals move into the bloodstream, and that's what we call is a feeling.

00:09:45.860 So when we're feeling motivated, we have a motive for action.

00:09:52.680 But when we're feeling lazy, I don't feel like it, I'm tired, I want to watch the Netflix show instead,

00:10:00.440 we know that that motivational circuit's deactivated, and most people don't have any idea why it's deactivated.

00:10:09.300 Why have I lost my mojo or my motivation?

00:10:12.680 Why don't I feel like it?

00:10:14.720 Why is it so hard for me to break this habit of, name a negative, disempowering habit that you have?

00:10:24.500 Because you haven't thought about what is a habit.

00:10:29.100 I have this thing called my brain.

00:10:32.360 It's worth over $100 billion.

00:10:35.280 And the average person can't tell me what's the operating system order look like.

00:10:41.800 How does it work?

00:10:42.700 Now, you may not think that's important, but here's what I can assure you.

00:10:49.560 You want to make three times, five times, ten times more money?

00:10:53.800 You better freaking understand how your brain works, because making that much more money is doable.

00:11:01.640 Getting, you know, you know, you know, in great shape and staying in great shape is doable.

00:11:09.500 You know, advancing your career is doable.

00:11:14.240 Building a business to $100,000, a million dollars, $10 million, $100 million.

00:11:18.540 It's doable, but it's not doable for those who are playing the game at the surface level.

00:11:25.900 And so I've studied the brain as a behavioral neuroscience researcher and entrepreneur for 44 years now.

00:11:36.580 And what we're discovering will just blow your mind, what you and I have, like inside our skull, in between, you know, these five, six inches between this year and that year.

00:11:49.500 There is just a, you know, we talk about AI now, and AI will be smarter than us this year.

00:11:55.920 In many cases, it already is, but...

00:11:59.200 I mean, I guess it depends on how you define smarter, but that's maybe a semantical discussion we could have later.

00:12:05.160 The AI, by the end of this year, in every single category, every category in the world, whether it's Beatles, financial planning, will have an IQ of 1,600.

00:12:22.940 Every category in the world.

00:12:25.920 Einstein was about 170.

00:12:30.520 So AI will be to us what Einstein is to a chimpanzee.

00:12:38.180 That's the level of shift that's happening.

00:12:41.640 Now, when we think about, okay, how do I use this, you know, brain of mine to the best of my abilities?

00:12:54.960 And let me just give you, like, an example.

00:12:57.260 Would you agree that functionally, every car works the same, electric or gas, functionally?

00:13:05.180 Sure, functionally, there's a process that needs, there's, like, a foundational process.

00:13:10.520 The fuel, whether it's water or electricity or gas, needs to go through.

00:13:15.960 Sure, got it.

00:13:16.580 Gas and engine, sometimes spark plugs.

00:13:19.380 We have these mechanisms that work fundamentally the same, right?

00:13:24.080 Depending on horsepower might be different, all that.

00:13:27.680 You know what most people don't know?

00:13:29.800 Functionally, every brain works the same.

00:13:32.340 So when we understand that I have this $100 billion organism, it's not even an organ in my books, it's an organism that's growing, pliable, malleable.

00:13:46.520 It can learn, it can release stuff, it can get rid of traumas or fears or doubts or worries or low self-worth or low self-esteem.

00:13:55.460 And I don't know how till I become somebody who knows how and I'm not resourceful to being resourceful.

00:14:01.320 I don't have grit till I have resilience.

00:14:03.320 These are all things that we can train our brain to have and or release.

00:14:08.220 But the average person doesn't know that they can.

00:14:14.260 And so they reinforce and repeat patterns, which is what the brain does.

00:14:19.260 That's what we call is a habit.

00:14:21.180 Ninety-five percent of your habits are repeated day after day, week after week.

00:14:27.300 Like how many people do you know go from making $100,000 to a million in a year?

00:14:32.580 How many people do you know?

00:14:34.020 No.

00:14:35.140 No.

00:14:35.340 You know, the other thing, John, about that that I've found fascinating is let's say I made a million dollars this year.

00:14:42.200 Yeah.

00:14:43.220 And this – or let's say I made a million dollars last year.

00:14:47.320 2025 for whatever reason, global response to a hysterical pandemic and like – or the economic situation or whatever.

00:14:57.960 And this year I make $300,000.

00:15:00.140 I – anecdotally, I'd be willing to bet that for every person who is in that scenario within the next probably three years will be right back to making a million dollars within the next two or three years.

00:15:13.120 Why?

00:15:13.180 Because they're doing something to create that sort of revenue.

00:15:17.180 And that's – I've heard it likened to a thermostat.

00:15:21.020 That's their thermostat.

00:15:22.320 Yeah.

00:15:22.840 That's exactly right.

00:15:23.500 There's something called a cybernetic mechanism.

00:15:27.640 Big word, but cybernetic just is a control and response mechanism.

00:15:32.360 When hot air comes into a room and the thermostat picks up, there's hot air that's hotter than the set temperature.

00:15:38.840 It sends a signal through the electrical system to turn on the air.

00:15:42.160 When cold air comes in, the sensor picks up a deviation from the setting.

00:15:47.320 It says, oh, cold air came in, turn on the heat.

00:15:50.080 That's called the cybernetic mechanism. 0.54

00:15:52.920 Humans have something called a psycho-cybernetic mechanism.

00:15:57.000 Most people don't know this.

00:15:57.980 I'll give you an example.

00:15:59.140 A fat set point.

00:16:02.360 You'll go, a fat set point?

00:16:03.640 Yeah, we have a fat set point in our brain that when we, you know, lose and or gain more fat than the setting, our behavior changes.

00:16:16.480 Our food changes.

00:16:17.720 Our exercise changes.

00:16:19.120 Why?

00:16:19.300 Because we have these settings.

00:16:20.520 And our brain is based on automatic processes.

00:16:23.600 When we are used to earning 50,000 a year or 50,000 a month or 50,000 a day, and we don't hit those thresholds, there's something that just kicks into another gear.

00:16:37.640 I used to have 1,200 salespeople working in my real estate company, 85 offices.

00:16:44.200 And I could tell you six months before the end of the year where Mary, Sally, Joe, Ryan would end up.

00:16:54.280 Do you know how I would know?

00:16:55.780 All I'd have to look at is their last two-year average.

00:16:59.560 I would know.

00:17:00.080 Look at the last couple of years.

00:17:00.960 I would know what trophies to order six months before our awards ceremony.

00:17:07.940 Now, were there some...

00:17:10.960 Let me ask you, John, on that.

00:17:12.140 Matt, sorry, I just want to interject real quick because I'm very curious.

00:17:16.500 And, you know, you said 50,000 a year.

00:17:19.900 At this point, and I'm really trying to be aware of like, and this is not an indictment against anybody who might be in that economic position or whatever.

00:17:26.780 It would be hard for me to say to make $50,000 a year.

00:17:31.980 Like that's not, that is not in my vocabulary at this stage in my life.

00:17:36.320 But I do also remember a time in my life where $50,000 a year would have been pretty nice.

00:17:41.440 Of course, yeah.

00:17:42.820 So the real question is for me and the guys who are listening is how do you, because if I'm a little cold or a little warm, I just go punch the thing on the thermostat and say, warm me up or cool me down.

00:17:54.300 But how do you do that in your own life where guys are dissatisfied with making $50,000 a year or dissatisfied with their body or dissatisfied with the relationship they have?

00:18:04.020 How do you actually go change that psycho-cybernetic mechanism, I think is what you called it?

00:18:10.220 Yeah, it's a, yeah, yeah.

00:18:12.000 So before we go to change anything or learning how to change anything, there's a fundamental shift in how we think that we have to shift.

00:18:27.060 So I'll give you an example and I'm going to ask you a question, everybody who's listening, you know, right now.

00:18:31.680 And, you know, hey guys, is it possible to make $100,000 right now or $250,000 in your job or your business or your job and a side hustle, right?

00:18:43.780 Is it possible?

00:18:44.620 So let's go with possible.

00:18:45.800 So the answer is yes.

00:18:46.700 Now, how do we turn possibility into predictability?

00:18:54.300 How do we turn it from possibility to predictability?

00:18:57.260 And the first thing, you know, I'm going to ask everybody is this.

00:19:01.660 Are you interested in making $100,000 or $250,000 or are you committed to doing it?

00:19:09.460 Answer that first.

00:19:11.200 And I'll tell you why I ask this.

00:19:13.000 Back when I was literally 19, I was making $1.65 an hour in a shipping department.

00:19:20.040 I was making more money selling drugs and doing breaking and entries and selling the stuff that I stole with my little posse, you know, of five other guys.

00:19:29.940 So that's kind of like my checkered past.

00:19:34.640 And my brother, who was concerned for my well-being because he thought I would go to jail or die, introduced me to this one guy.

00:19:41.600 His name was Alan Brown.

00:19:42.800 He was a very successful real estate guy, philanthropist, kind, kind, kind, intelligent man.

00:19:48.920 And he just cared about other people.

00:19:51.140 And he told my brother, I'll meet with your brother.

00:19:53.100 Maybe I can give him a job.

00:19:54.800 And I said, great.

00:19:55.700 So I took the train 350 miles from Montreal to Toronto, met him at lunch.

00:20:00.240 And he asked me what I wanted to achieve.

00:20:02.240 And at that time, at 19, I said, well, I'd like to buy a car because I'm tired of taking the subway to work.

00:20:07.140 I'd like to make more than $1.65 an hour.

00:20:09.780 And I want to move out of my parents' house.

00:20:11.540 And he says, well, that's great.

00:20:13.720 He said, are you interested in doing, you know, something better than that?

00:20:19.760 Or are you committed to it?

00:20:21.240 And he said, and before you answer it, like, what would you love to achieve?

00:20:26.060 And I go, what do you mean?

00:20:26.840 He said, well, how much money would you like to make in a year?

00:20:29.920 I'd love to make, you know, $100,000.

00:20:32.320 I said, well, that's too low.

00:20:34.160 He said, how much money would you really like to make?

00:20:36.680 I was 90.

00:20:37.260 Listen, I'm 63 now, 44 years ago.

00:20:40.760 Okay.

00:20:40.980 Right.

00:20:41.340 $100,000 was not insignificant.

00:20:43.360 It was a lot.

00:20:44.220 My father made $25,000 as a cab driver.

00:20:47.740 Anyway, we got down to I want to make millions.

00:20:50.380 And I want to travel the world.

00:20:51.940 And I want a four-bedroom house.

00:20:53.140 And I want a Mercedes-Benz.

00:20:54.100 And I want a town car.

00:20:55.080 And I want to retire my parents.

00:20:56.020 So he had me write down this incredible life that was my imagination.

00:21:00.720 And then he said, now answer the question.

00:21:04.700 Are you interested in achieving all of these things or are you committed to achieving them? 0.94

00:21:10.100 And I felt a little bit dumb.

00:21:11.740 I left high school grade 11 because I failed English, failed math.

00:21:14.840 I didn't do well in school.

00:21:16.360 I didn't feel smart enough.

00:21:18.060 And I asked him, I said, excuse me, but what's the difference?

00:21:21.720 Never forget this in my life because it was the single question and one answer that changed the trajectory of my life.

00:21:27.480 He says, when people are interested, they come up with stories and reasons and excuses of why they can't do it or it can't be done.

00:21:38.040 He says, they allow their beliefs to control their behaviors.

00:21:42.240 He says, they allow fear to hold them hostage.

00:21:45.280 And they keep repeating the same stuff over and over again.

00:21:48.920 He says, they're open to learning, but they're resistant to change.

00:21:54.480 He says, when somebody is committed, and this was the game changer for me, Ryan, when I got, why I got into the brain research.

00:22:02.780 He says, they upgrade their identity to match the new destiny.

00:22:10.960 They develop the beliefs that it's possible and they can do it.

00:22:16.460 They upgrade their knowledge and skills to match the lifestyle and the money they want to make.

00:22:22.960 And then they start to develop the habits to make achieving those goals impossible not to achieve.

00:22:32.960 I go, wow, that sounded so good.

00:22:38.320 And he leans in and he says, so now that you know the difference, which are you, son?

00:22:43.900 And I was like, well, well, sir, in that case, I'm committed.

00:22:49.360 And he reaches out his hand.

00:22:51.560 He says, in that case, I will be your mentor.

00:22:54.740 And God's honest with you.

00:22:55.880 I said, thank you, sir.

00:22:57.460 That's awesome.

00:22:58.860 What's a mentor?

00:23:02.140 And he explained what a mentor was.

00:23:04.420 Three weeks later, I moved from Montreal to Toronto.

00:23:07.400 I borrowed $500 to go into a real estate class for five weeks, which I hated.

00:23:13.460 But I passed the test on my own for a change.

00:23:16.960 I lived with my brother, drove his Dodge Dart to take him to teach tennis, which is what he did.

00:23:23.220 Went to real estate school, went back to pick him up, went home.

00:23:26.780 June 20th, 1980, I became a licensed real estate agent.

00:23:30.240 I was 19.

00:23:31.060 First, first half of year, June till December, I made $62,000.

00:23:38.940 He took $31,000 for his 50% cut.

00:23:42.340 He kept upgrading my skills.

00:23:45.740 And I'll share with you one other thing that he did in just a moment.

00:23:48.420 And then the next January through December, I ended up making a gross amount of $355,000.

00:23:58.380 He took 50%.

00:23:59.640 I made my $150,000 and I thought I died and went to heaven at 20 years young.

00:24:07.140 Now, how do you make that kind of shift?

00:24:12.020 First, you remember the goals he asked me about?

00:24:16.720 Sure.

00:24:17.440 Every day, every day, he had me sit in the office.

00:24:22.820 When I got there at 8 a.m., and I had to look at the goals that I had written out and run my hands across the goals,

00:24:30.520 my fingers to send a signal from my fingers to my brain to activate my imagination center, my motivational center. 0.95

00:24:39.280 And yes, it also activated my fear and bullshit meter. 0.66

00:24:42.980 Because as I was looking at these goals, there's a part of me going, you're not achieving those things. 1.00

00:24:48.380 You're not smart enough.

00:24:49.260 You're not good enough. 0.99

00:24:50.180 You're sure.

00:24:50.980 Imposter syndrome, right?

00:24:52.220 It wasn't even, there wasn't an imposter syndrome, there was anything to imposter. 0.99

00:24:57.200 It was like, I don't believe this shit syndrome. 0.99

00:25:00.840 But he had me, while I was doing that, read some affirmations. 0.98

00:25:06.240 You know, I'm so happy and grateful that I'm now earning $10,000 a year.

00:25:09.860 So I would read it, I would actually record it on my cassette tapes and listen to it. 0.99

00:25:15.880 And even while I was listening to it for the first 30, 60 days, there was a little voice in my head that said, bullshit. 1.00

00:25:25.200 Bullshit. 1.00

00:25:26.400 Fucking haven't made a nickel yet. 1.00

00:25:29.320 You know, you're not making $10,000 a month. 0.99

00:25:31.320 But repetition of a visual pattern, an emotional pattern, a language pattern, self-talk, activates brain cells, right?

00:25:43.960 And he said that the reason athletes and astronauts visualize what they want to achieve is because they're activating and reinforcing a new pattern that they want to make automatic.

00:25:58.700 Later on, I found out that's something called automaticity, right?

00:26:05.740 So you didn't think this morning, how should I get dressed?

00:26:10.540 How should I brush my teeth?

00:26:12.820 How can I eat today?

00:26:15.020 But you know what?

00:26:16.480 Go back in time.

00:26:18.360 You didn't always know how to get dressed, how to brush your teeth, how to pour, you know, a glass of milk or juice or make coffee.

00:26:25.960 You learn how to do a podcast or any number of things.

00:26:28.700 Things that are much more sophisticated, sure.

00:26:30.700 Yeah, so he helped me use visualization and he told me visualization is a brain simulation.

00:26:38.520 Oh, okay.

00:26:39.680 And because I played basketball as a kid, you know, in school, he says, did you practice free throws?

00:26:45.880 I said, well, of course I did.

00:26:47.400 And I played hockey also.

00:26:48.560 And he said to me, well, do you have drills that you practice and you do them over and over and over again?

00:26:56.940 Well, of course we did.

00:26:59.040 He says, well, that's to make the conscious unconscious.

00:27:04.140 He says, repetition is what reinforces the patterns.

00:27:09.380 When you reinforce any pattern, a good one or bad one, an empowering one or disempowering enough, your brain just automates it to conserve energy.

00:27:19.500 So, day one, day 25, day 30, you know, I didn't believe that I was good enough, smart enough, worthy enough.

00:27:28.960 But I backed it up every day with the other part of what he taught me.

00:27:34.640 And he says, great.

00:27:35.480 You want to make 10 grand a month?

00:27:36.900 Here's the recipe.

00:27:38.680 A hundred phone calls a day.

00:27:40.780 And he gave me a script that was laminated.

00:27:44.180 And I would sit there.

00:27:46.240 Honestly, I had a book of the homes in the neighborhood, okay, street by street by street.

00:27:51.900 I can't remember the name of the book.

00:27:53.240 It was like a $700 book that he paid for.

00:27:55.980 And I would take like one street and I would take my sheet of paper and I would go, hi, this is John Asraf with Alan Brown Real Estate Company.

00:28:06.720 We have somebody who wants to move into the area.

00:28:09.920 Have you thought about making a move?

00:28:12.220 That's kind of like day one, reading off the script.

00:28:15.120 If they said yes, I had the other script.

00:28:18.100 If they said no, I had the other script.

00:28:19.900 You had the different one.

00:28:20.920 So, I knew if they said yes, I said, great.

00:28:23.240 Can we come back?

00:28:24.220 Can we come over today at three o'clock or would five o'clock be better so we could see the house and explain it to our buyers?

00:28:29.860 So, I made a hundred calls a day.

00:28:32.400 I had a sheet of paper for every call I made.

00:28:35.580 The sheet of paper had $15, $30, $45, $60, $75, $90.

00:28:40.480 And that represented every call that I made that I spoke to somebody who was worth $15 to me.

00:28:46.240 The per call regardless of what the outcome was.

00:28:49.440 Yeah.

00:28:49.880 So, he said, now listen, sometimes you're going to make that first call.

00:28:53.100 Somebody says, as a matter of fact, we just talked about it.

00:28:54.920 Come on over.

00:28:56.180 That'll happen.

00:28:57.000 He said, but 99% of the calls, you're not going to get anybody to like you.

00:29:02.500 They're going to hang up on you.

00:29:03.560 They're going to swear at you.

00:29:05.000 They're going to greet you for calling them at the time.

00:29:07.400 He says, don't worry about it.

00:29:08.300 That's just part of the game.

00:29:09.620 So, he taught me the rules.

00:29:10.120 Everybody should work in a call center at some point in their life.

00:29:12.740 Like, everybody should absolutely do that.

00:29:14.880 He taught me the rules of the game.

00:29:16.540 Then he taught me how to door knock.

00:29:18.060 Then he taught me how to do it for sale by owners.

00:29:19.700 And I just upgraded my skills while I was upgrading my beliefs and identity.

00:29:26.500 And then all of a sudden, I had a couple of wins. 0.98

00:29:28.620 Like, holy shit, this works. 0.89

00:29:32.100 And so, I ended up being a very, very good real estate agent in my early 20s. 0.98

00:29:38.920 And then I started my own real estate company at 26 and opened up 85 offices in 10 years.

00:29:45.780 Had 1,200 salespeople.

00:29:47.500 And I taught them what I did.

00:29:49.560 And we were doing $4.5 billion a year in sales.

00:29:51.880 So, I know it works.

00:29:55.080 And I taught them what to do.

00:29:57.460 And the average income went from $38,000 a year to $120,000 a year per person.

00:30:05.820 Unheard of.

00:30:06.520 We became the number one real estate company in the state of Indiana.

00:30:09.200 And I moved to Indiana.

00:30:10.440 I didn't even know where it was when I moved there.

00:30:12.180 So, I understand a little bit about the neuromechanics of the inner game.

00:30:18.640 And what most people don't understand is, why should I do it?

00:30:23.840 And if I do, what should I expect?

00:30:27.600 And what you should expect, if you do the inner work, plus you know the outer work, what should you do to make $100,000 or $250,000 or $500,000 or $1 million in a day?

00:30:43.540 Then you can match the behaviors with what I call are the two high-income-producing activities or high-impact-producing activities every single hour.

00:30:57.480 And you focus on the critical few things versus the trivial many things.

00:31:04.840 Man, I'm going to step away from the conversation very quickly.

00:31:08.100 I don't know how else to sugarcoat this.

00:31:10.100 If you want to achieve maximum-level results in your life, you are going to need men in your corner. 0.99

00:31:16.320 And as much as I'd like to say that our men's event in May, the men's forge, is going to be mind-blowing and earth-shattering for you,

00:31:24.320 I really think it's the connections and the relationships that you're going to forge outside of our event that will change your life.

00:31:34.400 If we were building a fire, the forge is the kindling.

00:31:37.180 The relationships that you tap into are the fuel and the fire to growth and opportunities that I think a lot of you have been waiting for.

00:31:45.460 Now, we are sold out at this point.

00:31:47.940 We made some adjustments.

00:31:48.920 We are sold out, but we are accepting a few holdout positions for those of you who want to band together in small, intimate settings

00:31:56.080 for the betterment of themselves and their families and their legacies.

00:32:02.500 So if you're interested in that, go to themensforge.com.

00:32:07.340 We have just a few, I think, opportunities for VIP spots.

00:32:11.760 Most are general admission at this point.

00:32:14.020 Either way, you're going to walk away with new connections, new relationships, new opportunities, and a new way of looking at life.

00:32:20.800 Go to themensforge.com.

00:32:23.360 That's themensforge.com.

00:32:25.840 Do that quickly because we have these few holdout spots left, and then we're wrapping it up and we're done.

00:32:32.180 Themensforge.com.

00:32:33.300 Yeah, I mean, it's interesting as you share these.

00:32:37.780 Our stories are not dissimilar.

00:32:39.920 I was in my financial planning practice, and I was about to fall out because I didn't know how to make it work.

00:32:45.940 And as a last-ditch attempt, because I'm so stubborn, I'm like, I'm not going to throw in the towel unless I try everything.

00:32:51.900 A last-ditch attempt, I reached out to a guy who was notorious for just killing it in the office.

00:32:58.520 And I said, hey, I don't know what to do here.

00:33:01.920 Like, I don't get it.

00:33:02.860 I don't know what to do.

00:33:03.800 I'm not closing deals.

00:33:05.740 I'm not getting appointments.

00:33:06.980 I don't know what to do.

00:33:07.880 And he's like, well, I'll help you.

00:33:10.140 And he said, but if I'm going to help you, it's 50% of whatever we sell together goes to me, 50%.

00:33:15.360 And my knee-jerk reaction was 50%.

00:33:19.500 I'm not giving you 50% of my business.

00:33:21.360 And he said to me, and I'll never forget, he said 100% of zero is zero.

00:33:26.020 That's right.

00:33:26.380 50% of 100,000 is 50,000.

00:33:28.780 So you want zero or you want 50?

00:33:30.640 I'm like, well, I want 50.

00:33:31.580 He's like, then we're partners.

00:33:33.780 And we went to work.

00:33:35.100 That's the best decision you made.

00:33:36.060 Oh, the best decision.

00:33:37.600 At that time.

00:33:39.320 Of course.

00:33:40.320 Yeah.

00:33:40.740 Yeah.

00:33:40.940 And the story you're telling is interesting because I did the same thing with my calls.

00:33:47.580 I start, he told me to track everything.

00:33:49.160 So I tracked everything and my goal every day was not to close deals, was not to get a hold

00:33:56.500 of so many people.

00:33:57.260 My goal was to make 20 prospecting phone calls per day.

00:34:01.660 It, I, and I did not allow myself to go home to my ex-wife and my children until I hit 20 calls

00:34:11.060 that day.

00:34:11.840 And the rest is history.

00:34:14.020 All right.

00:34:14.280 And mine was a hundred.

00:34:15.640 Mine was a hundred calls a day because a lot of people weren't home.

00:34:19.580 It was back in the day.

00:34:20.320 Right.

00:34:20.800 And then, and then, you know, once I finished that, I had, I had, you know, time to upgrade

00:34:24.940 my knowledge and skills.

00:34:26.100 The other best lesson ever was invest one hour a day on upgrading your knowledge and

00:34:33.900 skills.

00:34:34.880 And he said to me, when you do that, one hour a day comes out to nine 40 hour weeks.

00:34:47.780 Three hundred and sixty.

00:34:48.380 One hour per day is nine 40 hour per week.

00:34:51.340 It's 40 hours per week.

00:34:53.220 It's 40 hour weeks.

00:34:55.460 Interesting.

00:34:57.000 Do you know what I've been doing for 40 years?

00:35:00.760 One hour a day.

00:35:02.120 Those, those one hours.

00:35:03.120 Yeah.

00:35:03.660 I have read thousands of books.

00:35:05.800 I have, I have upgraded my knowledge and skills and many, many areas.

00:35:10.740 Um, and that's allowed me to expand my awareness, expand my knowledge, expand my, you know, my,

00:35:17.940 um, skills, you know, for the last five years, actually last two and a half years, I've spent

00:35:24.220 two hours a day on AI and learning AI.

00:35:27.780 I've been doing keynotes on AI.

00:35:29.780 I've been teaching my students AI and how to use it.

00:35:33.320 Um, so there are some philosophies and understanding.

00:35:37.540 So can you work hard and not make money?

00:35:41.320 Yeah.

00:35:41.920 Perfect example.

00:35:43.200 What you were doing before and what he taught you to do after.

00:35:46.920 So specialized knowledge does matter.

00:35:50.980 And it's not a matter of how much you work.

00:35:55.360 It's what are you accomplishing in the time that you work.

00:35:59.920 You cannot manage time.

00:36:01.880 The only thing you can manage is what you do in time.

00:36:05.180 And success is a game of finesse and you can play the game at a kindergarten level, grade

00:36:12.520 school level, high school level, university level, pro level, all-star level, and you can

00:36:19.000 upgrade your skill on just about anything.

00:36:22.040 Now, somebody wants to make a million dollars a year.

00:36:24.900 You're not doing it with high school skills.

00:36:28.120 No way.

00:36:29.220 It ain't happening.

00:36:30.280 Period.

00:36:30.780 End of story.

00:36:32.740 You know, you want to, you know, think about this.

00:36:34.220 Why do 92% of all small business owners fail within five years?

00:36:40.920 Is it because how to grow a small business doesn't exist?

00:36:46.400 Or that they're unwilling to work hard, which I don't agree with.

00:36:49.740 Most entrepreneurs, I would say they're absolutely, they're willing to work hard.

00:36:53.960 That's not the issue.

00:36:55.020 Yeah.

00:36:55.440 I coach hundreds of them at a time that pay me to be in my coaching program.

00:37:00.620 And do you know, 90, I'd say 99% cannot tell me their highest income producing activity and

00:37:11.400 even what the difference is between high income producing activity and high impact producing

00:37:18.840 activity.

00:37:19.440 I say, hey, what'd you do today to make money?

00:37:23.540 Oh, I was working on my website.

00:37:25.100 I said, that's not making money.

00:37:26.500 It's getting something you need to get ready to make money.

00:37:30.020 Next person.

00:37:30.660 What'd you do to make money?

00:37:31.960 Oh, we're just finishing the brochure.

00:37:34.500 What do you mean?

00:37:35.580 I understand you need a brochure.

00:37:37.300 Um, when I asked them, open up your calendar for me and answer this question.

00:37:43.420 I usually do this in groups of several hundred.

00:37:45.820 Um, let's say you worked 50 hours the last seven days.

00:37:49.000 Let's just say 50 hours.

00:37:50.360 How many of those hours were you in front of somebody that could buy your program, product

00:38:00.600 or service if you have a business or how many people came to your sales page or your masterclass

00:38:09.860 or your whatever, where you had the opportunity to make a sale at that point.

00:38:15.480 And most people are like two hours, one hour, none, five hours.

00:38:23.840 I said, well, that's why you're not making enough money.

00:38:27.960 It is hard though.

00:38:30.360 You know, John is, as somebody who's been in, in business and entrepreneurship for decades

00:38:34.420 for you at this point and me for, well, decades also, it's weird to say, but also decades,

00:38:39.720 not as many as you probably.

00:38:41.020 Um, I think what is really challenging for a lot of men is the, the, that concept of

00:38:49.660 the E-myth.

00:38:50.360 And I'm sure you're familiar with the E-myth that just because I'm good at a thing that

00:38:55.200 I will be good at business.

00:38:56.920 And it's hard for us as aspiring entrepreneurs or new entrepreneurs to let go a little bit

00:39:05.460 and say, okay, well, look, I'm not going to be the janitor.

00:39:08.420 I'm not going to be the bookkeeper.

00:39:09.800 I'm not going to be the, um, website builder.

00:39:13.980 I'm going to be the salesman, which is what I am.

00:39:16.340 And I have no problem or qualms about saying that.

00:39:19.380 No, that was really hard for me as a young entrepreneur to say, I got to pay somebody

00:39:23.560 to do this.

00:39:24.540 It's a little scary knowing that it's going to free up some time.

00:39:28.920 And then is that going to pay for itself?

00:39:31.760 Do you understand the dilemma?

00:39:33.500 Of course I do.

00:39:34.000 Um, I, I understand the dilemma, but I also understand that it's a paradigm problem, right?

00:39:42.520 It's a, it's a paradigm problem.

00:39:44.000 And when I was taught by my mentors, entrepreneurship, like in real estate, in insurance, uh, it's

00:39:54.100 a, it's a, it's a face to face, belly to belly, you know, you're, you're prospecting and selling.

00:39:59.880 That's the name of the game.

00:40:01.300 But then, um, you find people to do your admin stuff.

00:40:05.820 Then you get, find people to do all your other stuff.

00:40:08.500 What, what most people don't learn early is the game.

00:40:13.300 Let's say, let's say entrepreneurship is a game.

00:40:15.980 All right.

00:40:16.300 We get that on a football team, you know, there's, let's say the owner, there's the

00:40:22.600 coach, there's the specialty team coaches.

00:40:25.380 We have the quarterback, we have the tight ends, we have the wide receivers.

00:40:29.040 We got the, we got, we got all positions on, on the team, hockey positions on the team.

00:40:34.880 Um, let's talk about a business, right?

00:40:37.780 There's a position.

00:40:38.940 One on the team is, um, sales position.

00:40:42.580 Can I give you actually a real world example?

00:40:44.380 Cause I'd like you to speak into the heart of one of the guys who I talked with today.

00:40:48.120 Let's do it.

00:40:49.200 Okay.

00:40:49.460 So let me just paint this scenario real quickly.

00:40:51.560 And, and I, and I want to hear what you have to say.

00:40:53.100 I think this will fit perfectly.

00:40:54.500 He's a young man.

00:40:56.080 He's a welder based on some past experiences.

00:40:59.600 I think he's made, he's said that he's made some decisions that he's facing the consequences

00:41:04.560 of.

00:41:04.880 I don't entirely know what that means, but we can make some assumptions and he's trying to grow

00:41:09.740 his welding business because ultimately he wants to be in the position.

00:41:13.060 And I can tell when he says, it says this, he wants to be in the position to help other

00:41:19.540 people learn how to weld and work with their hands and build things.

00:41:23.700 And he has a real heart for serving other people, but he's consumed with the frustrations

00:41:31.480 of financial management and bookkeeping.

00:41:33.440 So I'm going to paint that scenario.

00:41:35.560 And I think this is going to tie into maybe hopefully what you're, what you're wanting

00:41:38.660 to share here.

00:41:39.320 Great.

00:41:39.860 So the first thing I would, I would ask him is, is bookkeeping important to your business?

00:41:44.720 Yes.

00:41:45.180 Great.

00:41:45.400 So it needs to be done.

00:41:46.660 Got it.

00:41:47.160 Okay.

00:41:47.400 That's, that's smart.

00:41:48.500 Um, is teaching other welders how to weld important to your business?

00:41:53.180 And, and he says, well, yeah, that's what I really love.

00:41:56.180 I say, okay.

00:41:57.640 Um, what if I shared with you that you can hire right now a bookkeeper, okay.

00:42:05.120 In the Philippines, for example, for five to $7 an hour that magically has got this talent

00:42:13.280 to run all of your financials and do all of your bookkeeping in 15 hours a week.

00:42:20.320 So it would cost you seven times $15.

00:42:23.500 Let's say, let's just round it to a hundred dollars.

00:42:25.840 A hundred bucks.

00:42:26.340 Would you pay a hundred bucks a week to take that pressure and frustration off of your plate

00:42:31.360 to have somebody else do that?

00:42:34.080 And then if you had an extra 15 hours, okay.

00:42:38.000 Or 20 hours, could you get one person to pay you to teach them how to weld?

00:42:43.400 And how much would you make for that?

00:42:45.140 A thousand dollars.

00:42:46.600 So would you trade a hundred dollars for a thousand dollars?

00:42:50.500 Is that a good decision or a great decision?

00:42:53.060 Great decision.

00:42:53.840 Ten to one.

00:42:55.060 So part of learning entrepreneurship is a know what's your role on your team.

00:43:01.580 Are you the quarterback?

00:43:03.380 Are you the water boy?

00:43:04.580 You know, because you can be the owner of the team and not do anything and you can put

00:43:09.460 people in place, okay, that you don't even have to pay an hourly or weekly or monthly fee.

00:43:16.660 Give them a profit share.

00:43:17.940 So there's ways to think about any scenario.

00:43:22.220 If you're like sales and you're good at it, good.

00:43:25.560 Do that because that is the highest return on your time that you can get and energy.

00:43:31.940 If you're good at marketing, do that.

00:43:33.720 Marketing and sales is the engine and the gasoline for every business, your car.

00:43:40.140 But then we have technology.

00:43:42.900 Like I have a hard enough time, Ryan, with my computer.

00:43:46.780 I have like a $5,000 computer in front of me.

00:43:49.240 I use it for email and texting.

00:43:51.680 Like I have a hard enough time getting to my drive.

00:43:53.820 But I have people on my team who play at that so that I could do the thing that I need to do.

00:44:03.660 If you're a singer, you shouldn't be sweeping the floor.

00:44:07.020 Now, you may need to sweep the floor initially, right?

00:44:11.860 But as soon as you can sing more, make some money and hire somebody to do the things that you

00:44:16.340 shouldn't do or don't want to do, that's the entrepreneurial mindset you need to shift to.

00:44:22.660 And you have to shift from I can't afford it to I can't afford not to buy my time back to do what I'm

00:44:29.200 uniquely qualified to do.

00:44:32.200 And not everybody's a salesperson.

00:44:34.300 I get that.

00:44:35.560 But not everybody's a quarterback.

00:44:38.520 But every team that's playing football says, okay, Joe is not the quarterback.

00:44:44.060 But you know what?

00:44:44.880 Maybe Mary can be the quarterback. 1.00

00:44:46.820 So our job as an entrepreneur is not to do all the things that need to get done.

00:44:55.780 Our primary job is to first say, well, what is easy for me to do?

00:45:00.540 What do I love to do?

00:45:02.180 Like, what's my position first?

00:45:04.480 Then I use my thinking skills to say, okay, well, I need a website.

00:45:10.880 Okay, I need selling.

00:45:12.820 I don't know how to sell.

00:45:13.740 I don't like selling.

00:45:14.540 I think I don't like selling.

00:45:16.000 I don't understand marketing.

00:45:18.040 I don't know how to create funnels or a podcast or ads or social media.

00:45:22.340 And I don't want to learn.

00:45:23.160 Great.

00:45:23.880 Now we start to strategically figure out how we are going to get it done versus us doing it.

00:45:33.140 Now, most people are not taught, especially if they start a business, that their job as the

00:45:40.700 founder is to make sure these things get done.

00:45:44.780 And depending on your budget or lack thereof, you develop strategies to be able to still

00:45:52.600 get it done.

00:45:53.620 And here's the rule.

00:45:55.260 You either are going to do it yourself.

00:45:57.380 You're going to get help doing it.

00:45:59.640 You're going to get it done for you, or you're not going to freaking do it.

00:46:03.760 So which one are you going to choose, right?

00:46:07.900 And so now we are starting to think about how to achieve goals versus have goals.

00:46:14.660 And now we become resourceful in the absence of any resources.

00:46:19.660 And the number one reason that business owners fail is not because they run out of money,

00:46:26.680 believe it or not.

00:46:27.320 Number one reason, they run out of hope because you know what they're doing?

00:46:32.980 Give me a second.

00:46:35.460 Let's assume this is business.

00:46:37.840 Is this solvable?

00:46:40.120 Sure.

00:46:40.900 Great.

00:46:41.760 The average person doesn't know that there's trillions of moves you can make with this

00:46:46.420 five by five by five.

00:46:47.880 Yeah.

00:46:48.040 I don't, I'm not saying I could solve it, but I know it's solvable for sure.

00:46:51.480 You know what the average business owner entrepreneur does?

00:46:52.940 All day long.

00:46:54.020 They're freaking working hard.

00:46:55.140 Look how busy I am.

00:46:56.340 Oh my God, Ryan.

00:46:57.760 Hold on, man.

00:46:58.460 Hold on, man.

00:46:59.320 Oh, let me get the yellow one there. 1.00

00:47:02.000 It's like, oh, fuck. 0.99

00:47:03.340 Hold on, I'm busy. 1.00

00:47:04.140 I'm really busy.

00:47:05.240 From morning till night, you'll do it.

00:47:06.640 You know you can do this for a billion years.

00:47:08.360 That's actually a true number and still not solve it unless you know the algorithm.

00:47:13.280 But if you know the algorithm, you can solve it in seconds or minutes.

00:47:17.020 And even if you want to build your billion dollar business, it's solvable, but not for

00:47:22.980 the average bear, okay, who's just going to sit there from morning until night trying

00:47:28.640 stuff, especially now.

00:47:30.980 Like right now, you can give me any category, any problem, any goal you have, and within

00:47:39.540 three and a half minutes, I will have a minute-by-minute, step-by-step plan to solve that or achieve

00:47:48.000 that by prompting GPT or Grok or Claude with the right information and the smartest tool

00:47:58.920 we have ever had at our fingertips will give me a checklist, a plan, resources, and tools

00:48:05.520 of exactly what to do by the minute.

00:48:08.000 You know what's funny?

00:48:10.160 As I had a friend, I went to an event a couple of weeks ago, Sorenx.

00:48:13.980 They do exercise equipment, a great company.

00:48:16.520 And Bert Soren's a good friend of mine, and he's been very supportive of me over the years.

00:48:20.580 And I went to their annual winter event called Winter Strong, and I ran into one of my friends,

00:48:25.440 and he said, I don't know how we got talking about it, but he said this.

00:48:28.660 He said, I was trying to calculate how to get from Texas to South Carolina, and I have

00:48:34.140 two vehicles, and one is the four, I don't remember what it was, like Ford F-350 Platinum

00:48:39.880 or whatever, and the other one is some sort of electric hybrid.

00:48:44.120 Again, I don't know the cars.

00:48:45.980 And he plugged them into chat at GPT, says, what is the cost if I take this vehicle versus

00:48:50.620 this vehicle and gas and maintenance?

00:48:53.380 And immediately, I mean, intuitively, we all know the electric vehicle, sure.

00:48:58.420 But it was a really interesting, I'm like, bro, I'd never even, I would never, I'd never

00:49:04.120 even thought about doing that.

00:49:05.680 I do it all the way, every day.

00:49:07.380 Using this tool.

00:49:08.700 But it leads me to an interesting thing here, is you said something that stood out to me,

00:49:14.980 is we have this amazing tool at our disposal, but you have to know the right inputs, and

00:49:19.880 how do you know the right questions to ask if you're trying to improve your business, or

00:49:25.840 your family, or yourself, how do you know what questions you should be asking?

00:49:29.980 Great.

00:49:30.900 So the first part of, let's say, the prompt is, I want you to act as an expert in hats,

00:49:41.480 an expert in nose hair, an expert in hemorrhoids, an expert in sex, an expert in growing a business,

00:49:47.980 you know, vitamins.

00:49:49.540 I have no money.

00:49:51.380 I have no experience.

00:49:52.960 I'm brand new.

00:49:54.400 I don't even know how to set up a company.

00:49:56.380 I know nothing.

00:49:57.500 You are the expert, GPT, for example.

00:50:01.520 I want you to take me by the hand like a beginner, and educate me, and test me to make sure that

00:50:11.780 I know phase one of what I need to know.

00:50:15.720 So you could set up a coach for sales, for marketing, for entrepreneurship, for any type

00:50:24.140 of business, any category in business, sales, marketing, management, finance.

00:50:28.520 You know what I did this weekend, this past weekend?

00:50:30.960 I was having an issue with my mobile phone, all right?

00:50:34.380 So I hopped onto my chat GPT, and I talked to it, right, because I have voice activation.

00:50:40.480 I said, hey.

00:50:41.200 What do you use, John?

00:50:42.480 Pardon?

00:50:42.740 What, what, what, um, you said chat GPT.

00:50:46.820 Is that what you're using primarily, or?

00:50:48.260 I use Claude and chat GPT primarily.

00:50:52.420 Writing with Claude, chat GPT for, for problems solving.

00:50:55.480 I just started using Grok this past week, which just.

00:50:58.740 Which is through X, right?

00:51:00.060 It's X, and it is blistering fast.

00:51:02.340 So I use one of the tools.

00:51:03.700 But I, but I, but I talk to it.

00:51:06.340 Like, you would talk to me.

00:51:07.440 Let's say you thought I was an expert in, in whatever, and said, hey, John, since you're

00:51:12.920 the expert in this, is it okay if I share with you what I'd like to achieve or know or

00:51:19.780 learn or do?

00:51:21.000 Um, and could you guide me like, like you would maybe a five-year-old so I really understand

00:51:27.060 it?

00:51:27.520 And could you create a checklist of either things I could read or a checklist of things

00:51:32.380 I could do or a checklist of things I could watch just like, and I only have 30 minutes

00:51:37.560 or 10 minutes or five.

00:51:39.420 Could you do that?

00:51:40.520 And it will come back to you.

00:51:41.720 Of course I can.

00:51:42.480 And here's, here's, and you can say, and ask me any question you would like to make sure

00:51:48.540 that you understand like where my level is.

00:51:51.860 And you will have this expert IQ of Einstein in whatever it is that you want, coach you

00:52:00.880 right now on any topic you want for free.

00:52:05.160 Like, like, I don't know if people understand it for fricking free.

00:52:08.560 So that's kind of like the, what we call is the generative AI part of artificial intelligence.

00:52:17.860 The new generation that just really is taken off right now is called agentic AI.

00:52:24.160 I could talk to, I can have my phone, which is right over here, right?

00:52:28.420 I can click on, um, some of the agentic AI and say, Hey, uh, there's five of us friends.

00:52:35.140 Uh, one of my friends lives in Utah.

00:52:36.580 I live in San Diego.

00:52:37.480 One of my friends lives in Greenland.

00:52:39.360 One lives in Uruguay.

00:52:40.720 The other one lives in Antarctica.

00:52:42.700 We all want to meet in London for a bachelor party on blank date.

00:52:46.960 Uh, we want to be there for three days.

00:52:48.680 Our budget's 250 US dollars per night.

00:52:51.800 Uh, we want to eat at a sushi restaurant.

00:52:53.960 We want to eat Thai food.

00:52:55.080 We want to eat Indian food while we're there.

00:52:57.300 Um, and we want you to book three excursions for us.

00:53:00.280 Can you take care of doing it for me?

00:53:03.840 It'll do all the research.

00:53:05.000 It'll come back with options for you.

00:53:07.540 It'll send you an email with everything that you need.

00:53:10.400 And then you can just say, go ahead and book it.

00:53:13.120 It'll book everything.

00:53:14.860 Send all five friends, their itineraries with their checklist, with what they need for passport

00:53:19.320 control.

00:53:19.960 Here's your restaurants.

00:53:20.960 Here's the name of the restaurants.

00:53:22.080 Here's the phone numbers.

00:53:23.060 Here's your reservation for the whole thing.

00:53:25.500 It won't give you the information to do it.

00:53:28.360 Agentic AI, an agent will do it for you.

00:53:34.080 Is there a, is there an AI tool that's when you say it'll do it, like, is there a tool

00:53:38.640 that would do that currently today?

00:53:40.560 There are tools that'll do it currently today.

00:53:43.080 And please enlighten us because I would like to know what that information is.

00:53:48.300 Well, what you want to do is set up some of your, your, there are some workflows that

00:53:52.540 you need to set up to get these to work for you.

00:53:54.740 So if you did chat GPT, the pro level, it's $200 a month.

00:54:00.500 They have an agent in there that will do it for you.

00:54:04.900 There's within Grok, there's tools that will do it for you.

00:54:08.480 That's called agentic AI, agentic artificial intelligence, which is agent, right?

00:54:13.820 An agent for you.

00:54:16.340 So, so I think like putting some wrappers around this, I don't care what your problem

00:54:22.900 is, your trauma, your limitations, whether they're financial, mental, emotional, it doesn't

00:54:29.840 matter what, what they are.

00:54:32.280 When you're committed, there's a solution, right?

00:54:37.280 When you're not, you just get more of the same.

00:54:43.500 And so you want to be in great shape.

00:54:48.900 We know how to get in great shape, right?

00:54:52.660 You want to have a better relationship with your kids after divorce, during a divorce, or

00:54:59.300 while you're married.

00:55:00.080 We come up with a formula for what does it take to be a great dad, a great friend, a

00:55:06.680 great employee, what it takes to have more self-discipline, what it takes to break a bad

00:55:11.940 habit and start a new one.

00:55:13.180 We know how.

00:55:15.020 But I'm going to keep coming back to this.

00:55:17.240 I've been doing this for a long time.

00:55:18.960 And I've trained, I've taught this to over a million students, is the success that people

00:55:25.860 want, that I've heard, is reserved for the committed.

00:55:31.740 It's reserved for those who just say, I'm ready to release, let go of my stories, my reasons,

00:55:38.740 my excuses, my habits, my limitations.

00:55:42.100 I'm ready to let that go.

00:55:43.640 And I am ready to level up my game.

00:55:48.020 I'm ready to level me up.

00:55:50.840 And if you're ready to level you up, then there is a path to follow.

00:55:57.660 And is it easy?

00:55:59.120 No, no, it's not easy.

00:56:01.560 It's easy not to.

00:56:02.680 It's not easy. 0.99

00:56:05.460 Well, it's easy to be a loser. 0.95

00:56:07.720 It's easy to be where you currently are. 0.97

00:56:09.660 You've already developed the habits to get you to exactly where you are for better or

00:56:13.300 worse.

00:56:13.580 That's easy.

00:56:14.440 That's easy.

00:56:15.180 That's right.

00:56:15.880 And what's hard is what we call is the switch cost.

00:56:21.600 See, that's the hard part.

00:56:24.080 And the switch cost is the cost, the mental, the emotional, the physical cost to break

00:56:32.660 free, right?

00:56:34.480 Break free from the current patterns and results.

00:56:39.100 Break free.

00:56:40.080 And when we're breaking free, we have to break free mentally.

00:56:45.160 We have to break free emotionally.

00:56:47.240 We have to break free physically.

00:56:49.740 And we have to break free from expectancy.

00:56:52.840 What that means is even though I want this, I expect what I already have.

00:57:00.980 Flesh that out a little bit more.

00:57:02.260 Even though I want this, I expect what I have.

00:57:04.800 Help me wrap my head around that.

00:57:08.140 When we develop, you know, a habit, right?

00:57:11.900 I know what I get.

00:57:14.140 I know the result because I've been repeating it over and over and over and over again.

00:57:19.500 Right?

00:57:19.980 And so I may want a bigger goal and a bigger vision and more of this or less of that.

00:57:26.760 But secretly in my subconscious mind, I expect what I already have because it's a known.

00:57:34.300 It's familiar.

00:57:34.760 And what we have to do is retrain our brain to expect the new vision, the new goal, the new result.

00:57:47.260 That's interesting because as I was talking with some guys today, we were talking about in one of our groups about some insecurities.

00:57:54.500 And there's the idea of imposter syndrome, which we kind of alluded to earlier.

00:57:59.100 And there's also the idea of I don't deserve.

00:58:02.420 I've noticed a lot of guys like I don't deserve to be happy.

00:58:06.020 I don't deserve to be in a good relationship.

00:58:08.160 I don't deserve financial success.

00:58:10.020 And I think they're running into this idea of expectations.

00:58:17.100 You only think or you expect what you currently have and that's what you think you deserve.

00:58:23.460 But how do you, even if you're not in that position, how do you then say, well, I expect better for myself, even though we might have some of those limiting beliefs, which I know you're a big proponent of talking about how to overcome.

00:58:35.780 Yeah, there's four things that hold the average guy back.

00:58:41.420 Number one, let's back up for a moment, Ryan, and let's just ask a question, right?

00:58:46.440 When you and I were born and everybody who's listening was born, were you born with any beliefs about anything, good ones or bad ones?

00:58:54.540 No, zero.

00:58:55.800 Were you born with a self-image or self-confidence or certainty or anything like that?

00:59:01.720 No.

00:59:02.300 Identity.

00:59:02.880 No.

00:59:03.060 Were you born with any fear of anything?

00:59:07.880 No.

00:59:08.800 And were you born with any knowledge and skills?

00:59:12.760 No.

00:59:13.180 I mean, the only caveat I would say to those questions is just some intuition, but outside of that, no.

00:59:17.760 Yeah.

00:59:18.720 But when you're born, you don't even know that you have intuition.

00:59:21.100 You basically have a genetic predisposition to find a nipple to get food, right? 1.00

00:59:26.380 Correct.

00:59:27.100 Right.

00:59:27.300 And that's what I mean.

00:59:28.120 Yeah.

00:59:28.300 Yeah, yeah.

00:59:28.960 So, and then you have a reaction to loud noises.

00:59:33.420 It's a startle effect, it's called.

00:59:35.060 And so, the man who says, I don't deserve to be happy, has evidence for why that's true, because they learned it somewhere.

00:59:47.060 I mean, we all have evidence.

00:59:48.620 It's whether or not we believe it or not, right?

00:59:50.140 Well, we have evidence, whether we believe it or not, but when we're two years old, three years old, five years old, we're in the imprinting years.

00:59:56.720 Then we move into something called the modeling years, then the experiential years.

01:00:00.460 There's something in the brain of every child ever born called a neuroplasticity switch.

01:00:08.180 What does that mean?

01:00:08.840 It just means that when you're born, you're learning new languages, you're learning how to, you know, at the right time, how to walk, how to eat, how to tie your shoes, how to cut with your knife and fork, how to use your spoon to have soup, you know, how to brush your teeth.

01:00:22.800 We're learning that, right?

01:00:23.880 So, everything is wiring fast.

01:00:26.040 It's called neurons that fire together because I'm learning and watching and smelling and tasting and experiencing, right?

01:00:32.160 The reason babies sleep so much is because they're creating so many connections by the millions an hour, and it's exhausting because it's a lot of work for the brain.

01:00:41.740 That's called neuroplasticity, the brain being plastic, creating connections.

01:00:46.480 At around 13 years young, it turns off.

01:00:49.420 Now, we reinforce what we heard or saw or experienced with mom or dad or a brother or sister.

01:00:58.700 You know, you're not good enough.

01:00:59.740 You're not smart enough.

01:01:00.400 Money's hard to make. 0.83

01:01:01.360 Money's easy to make, but we get rid of it so fast.

01:01:03.400 There's not enough.

01:01:04.560 You know, we start to develop these ideas, you know, about what's true and what's not about ourselves and the world.

01:01:11.600 So, when somebody has a belief that is limiting them, let's ask ourselves this question.

01:01:18.100 What is a belief in the brain, whether it's good or bad?

01:01:24.540 And the answer is it's nothing more than cells, neurons that fired and wired together and got reinforced, and now we have these beliefs.

01:01:34.040 I think it's our desire as humans to look for patterns to create predictable results.

01:01:39.300 Why did this happen? 1.00

01:01:40.360 Because you're a loser. 1.00

01:01:41.280 That might not be true, but that's the story you're telling yourself. 1.00

01:01:44.700 Yeah.

01:01:45.540 Or it happened because of her, because of him, because it always happens to me, right?

01:01:49.900 So, we have the evidence and the story.

01:01:52.440 So, when somebody says, you know, I don't deserve to earn this much.

01:01:56.340 I don't deserve to have my own business.

01:01:58.380 I don't deserve to be happy.

01:01:59.580 I don't deserve deserving happens to come from low self-worth, self-image, self-esteem, but we weren't born with it.

01:02:09.960 So, somehow, that specific pattern in my brain, and I call it that neuromuscle, okay, didn't get wired with a strength that you need.

01:02:22.560 It got wired with a weak neuromuscle.

01:02:27.020 So, if it's true, if it's true that neurons that fire and wire together reinforce, is it possible for me to use language, patterns, emotions, and behavior to re-fire and rewire that pattern so it's empowering me now instead of before?

01:02:47.400 And the answer is, of course it is.

01:02:49.120 I call that.

01:02:49.720 That's the thermostat we talked about.

01:02:50.860 Innercise.

01:02:52.380 I call that Innercise.

01:02:54.200 That's why I came up with this entire body of work in my app called Innercise to do that with people.

01:03:00.100 So, let's say I say, in the past, I used to think and feel and believe that I didn't deserve blank.

01:03:07.740 Make more money, have this, have that.

01:03:10.600 In the past, I used to believe this.

01:03:12.200 And now that I'm an adult and I understand how my brain works and I'm so powerful, I'm choosing to believe that I am worthy of blank, blank, and blank.

01:03:22.420 And it is causing me to feel empowered and positive and happy and I'm going to take action as if I am empowered right now.

01:03:30.980 Now, what if I took one action step just to prove that that's true, even though it's a lie right now?

01:03:37.280 What if I did that every day for 66 days?

01:03:40.720 Now, why 66?

01:03:44.180 There's something magical that happens with spaced repetition.

01:03:48.580 And there's some research that came out of University of Toronto several years ago that says between day 66 and day 365, depending on how deeply rooted this belief is,

01:04:01.280 the old pattern gets weaker and it starts to let go of its grip on our thinking and feeling and behavior.

01:04:12.100 And because we're using energy to fire this new pattern off, I'm so happy and grateful, you know, or in the past, I used to believe this.

01:04:19.800 And now I'm so happy and grateful that I am worthy.

01:04:22.200 I'm successful.

01:04:23.020 I'm earning this.

01:04:23.880 I'm happy.

01:04:24.400 I'm this, whatever it is.

01:04:25.240 We start to reinforce a new pattern and based on the law of automaticity and the brain's desire to conserve energy versus use energy.

01:04:38.480 Our brain says, man, you've been doing this for 60 days.

01:04:43.280 Let me just make this automatic.

01:04:45.180 So you stop using all this precious glucose and man, all of a sudden you start thinking, feeling and behaving in alignment with this new thing that you,

01:04:55.240 you deliberately evolved yourself into.

01:04:58.880 And if you add the emotion as if it's happening, the energy in motion.

01:05:06.120 First, the new words release neurochemicals that are indicative of the language pattern.

01:05:15.360 Empowering positive words actually release. 0.94

01:05:17.820 If I say, God, I feel shitty. 0.99

01:05:19.840 My brain releases the shitty neurochemicals. 0.99

01:05:22.500 God, I feel. 1.00

01:05:22.920 You're going to feel shittier.

01:05:23.900 That's right.

01:05:25.360 So energy will flow to where attention goes.

01:05:30.540 So if I'm deliberately choosing my language patterns, if I'm deliberately managing my state, 100 trillion cells to match what I just said.

01:05:40.560 And then if I just say, OK, now, since I understand how to reinforce a pattern, I'm going to take one little action step based on what I just said.

01:05:50.700 Do that for 66 days.

01:05:53.700 Come back to me and tell me that it didn't work and I'll eat a sock.

01:06:01.220 Live on this podcast.

01:06:02.840 Live on the podcast.

01:06:04.440 Now, that's the neuromechanics of what's going on.

01:06:07.880 Now, I'm activating several different parts of my brain, like members of my tribe, members of my orchestra.

01:06:16.300 Now, I'm leading, OK, my band, my orchestra. 0.97

01:06:20.880 Instead of it reinforcing its lazy ass, disempowering, destructive, negative patterns that I learned from wherever I learned. 0.88

01:06:29.380 I don't care where I learned it or why all I care about is now I'm running the show and I am stepping up and being the CEO director of my life. 0.96

01:06:39.120 And I'm going to learn the tools to do it so that I speak positively and an empowering, constructive, build me up way versus destructive, disempowering way.

01:06:51.460 The reason most people have 80 percent, 5,000 out of 6,200 thoughts, 5,000, 80 percent of 6,200 is about 5,000 thoughts are negative, disempowering, destructive thoughts.

01:07:02.060 It's because they've been reinforcing it for 3, 5, 10 years, 20 years.

01:07:06.800 Well, of course you're going to have that pattern.

01:07:09.300 And all the research shows we repeat those thoughts and emotions 90 percent of the time.

01:07:17.580 So now I'm going to replace negative with positive, disempowering with empowering, destructive with constructive.

01:07:25.920 As I upgrade my skills and I take small, consistent actions towards what I want and to make what I just said and felt true.

01:07:37.180 Now, consistency compounds.

01:07:43.680 Consistency compounds.

01:07:46.540 And everybody knows the little story.

01:07:48.800 What would you prefer if I gave you a million dollars right now or a penny right now?

01:07:53.620 But every day, the amount doubles.

01:07:56.380 So it's a penny today, two tomorrow, four the next day, eight the next day, 16, 32, 64, 128, et cetera.

01:08:02.880 Which would you take if there was 31 days in a month?

01:08:06.320 Right.

01:08:06.800 Of course, you'd be better off taking the pennies.

01:08:09.220 You're better off saying, I'll take the penny today and just double down, baby. 0.81

01:08:13.000 On day 31, you have a million and a half bucks instead of a million.

01:08:17.800 That's so crazy.

01:08:19.160 That's crazy.

01:08:20.060 Right.

01:08:20.420 But that's where consistency compounds.

01:08:23.620 Now, you know what most young guys and old guys do? 0.99

01:08:28.220 It's like fucking fast food mentality. 0.99

01:08:30.880 I want it now. 1.00

01:08:32.580 Well, you've thought this way for freaking five, 10 years.

01:08:35.760 What do you mean you want it now?

01:08:38.080 You're not losing that, you know, 15 pounds on your belly unless you're getting surgery today.

01:08:43.300 Now.

01:08:44.320 You're not making that $100,000 now unless you have the infrastructure in place.

01:08:48.300 You're not making a million this year unless you get the mindset and the skill set and the behaviors right. 0.98

01:08:53.400 So get your head out of your ass and stop being delusional and let's get a proper plan in place for mindset, skill set, and actions to develop the habits so you become the type of person, the identity, the character that can achieve any goal you set. 0.99

01:09:10.180 That's an empowered man. 1.00

01:09:13.820 Anything less than that is then using the drug of choice, which is hopium.

01:09:19.080 I hope things get better.

01:09:21.680 And I love.

01:09:22.860 Well said.

01:09:23.300 I love hope.

01:09:24.260 I love prayer.

01:09:26.060 I believe in God.

01:09:27.020 And God wants to help you.

01:09:30.380 But he also says, you know, I'll help you.

01:09:32.740 Now move your feet.

01:09:34.660 Like move your feet.

01:09:35.800 And let's get you doing the things you need to be doing, too.

01:09:38.640 And I'm not religious.

01:09:40.360 Right.

01:09:40.520 I'm not a religious guy.

01:09:42.260 But I believe in the power of the universe and the intelligence within me and all around me and within every human being, every man alive, every woman alive.

01:09:51.060 And I also.

01:09:51.520 John, how do we connect more with you?

01:09:52.920 I mean, I'd love the guys for the guys to know where to connect more, learn more about books and programs, courses, coaching, resources you have available.

01:10:01.080 Yeah.

01:10:01.220 One of the easiest things to maybe start with is hop into the App Store, pick up my InnerSize app.

01:10:08.740 You can get a week free.

01:10:10.420 It's like if you want to sign up, it's 100 bucks for a year.

01:10:13.080 There's like 600 InnerSize that are already created for health, wealth, relationship, career, business, sales, entrepreneurship with world-renowned experts and videos.

01:10:21.600 But check out JohnAssRef.com.

01:10:24.740 I've got a lot of stuff you could read that's free on the mindset stuff and on doing that.

01:10:29.680 I've got hundreds of videos on YouTube.

01:10:32.360 I'm on social media, on Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn.

01:10:37.840 And then my company is called MyNeuroGym.com.

01:10:41.680 And that's kind of like, you know, your gym for your brain to bring out the best in you and achieve your potential faster.

01:10:48.580 Well, we're going to sync it all up.

01:10:50.000 I love this conversation.

01:10:51.100 I took notes and notes.

01:10:52.680 Whenever you saw me looking down, it wasn't that I was distracted.

01:10:55.660 I'm sitting here taking notes because there's some things that I need to go through for myself.

01:11:00.100 I'm like, I need to do that.

01:11:01.140 I need to do that.

01:11:02.000 I need to do that.

01:11:03.000 So I'm excited to put some of this stuff into action.

01:11:05.400 John, thank you for joining me today.

01:11:06.860 Thank you, Ryan.

01:11:07.400 It's been a joy and so much fun.

01:11:10.740 Gentlemen, there you go.

01:11:11.480 My conversation with John Assaraf.

01:11:13.180 I hope that you enjoyed this one.

01:11:14.620 I've been following John for years at this point.

01:11:17.040 And his team reached out to me several months ago and said, hey, John would like to come on the podcast.

01:11:21.100 And I thought, what better fit?

01:11:24.100 I mean, there really isn't a better fit in how to tap into our brains and our supercomputers that we have situated between the ears that we have.

01:11:32.020 And this one did not disappoint.

01:11:34.560 As I said earlier, I've been using his InnerSize app.

01:11:38.260 The physical fitness realm is something that I won't say comes easy for me, but definitely more naturally and something I tap into.

01:11:46.940 But it's the brain power.

01:11:48.080 It's the emotional side.

01:11:49.380 It's the exercising the gray matter in my mind that really has been not hard necessarily, but something I've needed to focus on.

01:11:59.020 And this has been instrumental in my own development.

01:12:01.560 And I can't wait to see where it goes from here.

01:12:03.080 So check out John on the gram, on Facebook, on Twitter, on X, on YouTube, wherever you're doing your thing.

01:12:09.920 Obviously, he's all over the place.

01:12:11.380 He was in The Secret and he's been all over mainstream media from Larry King and Anderson and Ellen DeGeneres Show and all of that.

01:12:20.060 But most importantly, he's got some tools that are available to you, including any one of his 14 books, including his two New York Times bestselling books.

01:12:29.000 So check it out.

01:12:30.000 John Assaraf.

01:12:30.760 In the meantime, make sure you check out The Forge.

01:12:33.840 A few holdover spots left, but not very many.

01:12:36.560 We got to shut it down here pretty quick, and I'm very excited that we're able to do that.

01:12:40.460 You're going to come out to St. Louis and rub shoulders and fight with, literally and figuratively, band with, connect with, and learn from some of the greatest men on the planet.

01:12:50.460 Check it out at themensforge.com.

01:12:53.460 All right, guys, that's all I've got for you today.

01:12:55.860 You've got your marching orders.

01:12:57.620 We will be back tomorrow for our Ask Me Anything.

01:13:00.560 Tomorrow's Ask Me Anything is a little different, so make sure you check it out.

01:13:03.860 Until then, go out there, take action, and become the man you are meant to be.

01:13:07.840 Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast.

01:13:14.200 If you're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be,

01:13:17.980 we invite you to join the Order at orderofman.com.

JOHN ASSARAF ｜ Unlocking Your Brain's Hidden Powers

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