Order of Man


Life's Uncertainties and Financial Wisdom | ASK ME ANYTHING


Episode Stats

Misogynist Sentences

10

Hate Speech Sentences

5


Summary

In this episode of the Ask Me Anything podcast, we have special guest and long time friend of the show, Sean McElroy on the show. We discuss the stock market and what it means to be a man of action.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 What are we doing financially?
00:00:01.460 What are we doing spiritually?
00:00:03.880 What are we doing mentally to have our houses in order?
00:00:07.700 If you're a spiritual individual, how's your testimony?
00:00:11.400 How strong is it?
00:00:12.640 Is it going to be easily shaken?
00:00:14.500 How's your emotional intelligence?
00:00:16.460 If you have to deal with a teenager that you haven't had to deal with yet,
00:00:20.260 are you ready for that?
00:00:21.240 Do you have your own emotional house in order
00:00:23.660 that you can now be in a position to deal with difficulty in life?
00:00:27.740 Are you in a position to deal with a death of a loved one?
00:00:32.700 You're a man of action.
00:00:34.360 You live life to the fullest.
00:00:35.820 Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.
00:00:38.760 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time, every time.
00:00:43.180 You are not easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong.
00:00:47.960 This is your life.
00:00:49.380 This is who you are.
00:00:50.780 This is who you will become.
00:00:52.560 At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,
00:00:55.540 you can call yourself a man.
00:00:58.100 Sean, it's good, brother.
00:01:00.680 Good morning.
00:01:01.480 I was thinking about doing the AMA with you this week.
00:01:04.120 I was thinking about it over the weekend.
00:01:05.280 I'm like, oh, it would be great to chat with Sean.
00:01:08.740 You guys would assume that I get to have conversations with Sean on a regular basis,
00:01:14.560 but the reality of it is, if it wasn't for the podcast,
00:01:17.040 I'm not even sure if we would ever talk, which is kind of sad, actually.
00:01:21.700 It is.
00:01:22.240 It's good to have you on, man.
00:01:24.780 How are you doing?
00:01:25.740 Great.
00:01:26.200 It's good to be on.
00:01:27.260 Life is good.
00:01:28.340 Just, you know, I gauge things being really good by how nonstop it is.
00:01:36.120 I tend to like to be in that situation, but effective and productive at the same time.
00:01:42.780 And when it's like that, I tend to lean more towards, instead of focusing on the stress of it,
00:01:49.780 the memories being built and what's been accomplished and the positive aspects that are coming from it.
00:01:57.960 And so, yeah, life is good.
00:01:59.860 And we were talking about this before we hit record.
00:02:02.320 I'm the complete opposite.
00:02:03.680 Nothing's ever good enough.
00:02:05.120 There's always things to be done.
00:02:07.420 And I'm highly ungrateful for everything.
00:02:10.000 And there's lots of things that need to be accomplished.
00:02:12.300 And when they're all done, Sean, then I'll be grateful.
00:02:17.080 And usually I'm starting to realize that that's never going to happen and I'm just going to die.
00:02:23.880 Which, man, I need to make some adjustments.
00:02:26.520 That's why these conversations are good, right?
00:02:28.900 And just being in those environments, it gives us those reminders.
00:02:32.680 Yeah, perspective and everything else.
00:02:34.740 So let's hop into headlines before we get started.
00:02:38.220 As you guys know, we're doing the Ask Me Anything.
00:02:41.600 We're going to field questions today from the Iron Council, our exclusive brotherhood.
00:02:46.660 And I don't know, over the last couple of months, we've started kind of just doing topics, right?
00:02:51.340 They're on the top of our minds to kind of kick us off what we call headlines.
00:02:55.960 But we've pulled headline items as well as just, I don't know, soapbox items that we want to talk about as part of the podcast.
00:03:04.040 But, Sean, you had something you want to kick us off?
00:03:07.120 Yeah.
00:03:07.360 And something that everybody thinks about, but nobody talks too much about, and that's the stock market.
00:03:15.880 It's just getting hammered.
00:03:18.460 And, you know, you look at the, I think it's, they pronounce it the Nikkei Index in Japan, took its biggest hit since Black Monday in 1986.
00:03:27.560 Its largest single day hit, it was like 12.5% or something.
00:03:32.520 It just got hammered.
00:03:34.360 And then global markets are down, the NASDAQ's down, the Dow, everything is just getting annihilated.
00:03:42.120 And this is pre-election.
00:03:45.460 It's, I mean, it hasn't even happened yet.
00:03:48.700 And we're already here.
00:03:49.860 Just massive sell-off all over the place.
00:03:52.680 The job markets are down.
00:03:55.760 Companies just aren't hiring.
00:03:58.000 You know, so there's all these factors in it.
00:04:01.280 And so I just thought I'd bring it up because, you know, people are thinking about it and worried.
00:04:06.200 And maybe we could just talk to that a little bit to give some assurance that the end of the world is not this week.
00:04:15.300 And Warren Buffett, from my understanding, is like stockpiling cash.
00:04:19.340 Oh, yeah.
00:04:20.000 He just sold half of their holdings in Apple.
00:04:23.740 Yeah.
00:04:24.780 Yeah.
00:04:25.300 So what's your takeaway, man?
00:04:27.280 Like, how do you know this, learn this, and go, no big deal?
00:04:32.560 Or is this important to you?
00:04:36.200 Like, what's your pivots based upon this?
00:04:39.720 I honestly don't have any when this is happening.
00:04:42.780 I just stay the course because our habits are so in tune with long-term.
00:04:50.380 Yeah.
00:04:50.560 And so we just stay the course.
00:04:53.020 And that was kind of my take on this and in helping ease people's minds.
00:04:57.520 If your habits are good and you're doing the right things with dollar-cost averaging and diversification,
00:05:04.240 I mean, if all of your eggs are in one basket and sitting in one place right now, you'd be losing your mind.
00:05:09.480 If you just have a couple holdings and you've kind of sunk everything into it, and, I mean, it could be scary.
00:05:15.800 Or if you're trying to time it necessarily, but if you just, I mean, I'd look at everything, all of my holdings and all the stuff that I have and all the things I do.
00:05:26.220 I mean, we have a lot of hedges against a lot of downturn.
00:05:30.080 But even in the stuff that's volatile, we have stuff going into it every month, and it's consistent.
00:05:35.880 And while it's down, we're going to be buying up a lot more shares, and eventually it's going to come up and we'll be fine.
00:05:42.960 But we were taught that.
00:05:45.960 I mean, I was taught that 25 years ago and started doing it.
00:05:50.400 And so this really doesn't worry me.
00:05:53.100 And because I started 25 years ago, this is the fourth time.
00:05:57.960 Well, I shouldn't say the fourth time yet, but it looks like it's going to be.
00:06:00.680 It looks like we're going to enter into another recessionary period, and so this will be the fourth one I've been through in 25 years.
00:06:09.380 And honestly, when these times come, I just keep getting wealthier.
00:06:14.840 But it's by not – it's having good habits, staying the course, not getting too emotionally wrapped up and trying to time everything with what's happening around us right now.
00:06:27.100 And if you have those fundamentals, you can be okay.
00:06:32.720 And oddly enough, I attach it to the book Atomic Habits, where financially most people have such bad habits and they do so many of the wrong things that they haven't cut out,
00:06:46.700 that it's just a matter of getting rid of those things that don't serve you and replacing them with the things that benefit you.
00:06:56.120 And staying that course.
00:06:58.860 Yeah.
00:06:59.280 I mean, it's just – if you don't mind me just spreading it outside of what you just said and making it a little bit more transcendent to other areas of our lives, I think it's really similar to our health.
00:07:11.680 There's a big difference between being overweight, out of shape, bad habits around what I eat, and then finding out you have cancer.
00:07:21.360 Yeah.
00:07:21.600 But it's like, dude, right?
00:07:24.540 Like you're already on a projection that's going to make it way worse, sugars amplifying the spread, all these other things, because you didn't have your shit together.
00:07:35.240 Yeah, and if it's not cancer, it's going to be something.
00:07:38.460 It's going to be diabetes.
00:07:39.480 It's going to be high blood pressure.
00:07:40.660 It's going to be –
00:07:41.380 Exactly.
00:07:41.660 Right?
00:07:41.880 But if you had some good habits and prepped and you were taking care of your body and eating healthy and then that showed up, your chances of weathering that storm is way higher if your house is in order.
00:07:56.160 Yes.
00:07:56.460 And so maybe that's the call out that I'm hearing too is like, what are we doing financially?
00:08:01.080 What are we doing spiritually?
00:08:03.640 What are we doing mentally to have our houses in order?
00:08:08.100 How's your – if you're a spiritual individual, how's your testimony?
00:08:11.820 How strong is it?
00:08:13.060 Is it going to be easily shaken?
00:08:15.200 How's your emotional intelligence?
00:08:16.780 If you have to deal with a teenager that you haven't had to deal with yet, are you ready for that?
00:08:22.980 Do you have your own emotional house in order that you can now be in a position to deal with difficulty in life?
00:08:29.840 Are you in a position to deal with a death of a loved one because you have your – you have strong mental fortitude and you have things worked out in your own mind?
00:08:39.620 No, you don't.
00:08:40.860 Then you're not ready.
00:08:42.160 You're not ready for a financial downturn.
00:08:44.200 You're not ready for a hardship.
00:08:45.320 You're not ready for physical elements or spiritual battles if we're not taking care of and being sovereign and owning our worlds, right?
00:08:56.180 And that's kind of what I'm hearing, at least on the financial side from what you're saying is, well, we got to be ready.
00:09:02.240 Yeah, and that's why I wanted to connect it to your habits because, again, it is transcendent with everything that you do.
00:09:08.380 And if you don't know what those habits are that are going to give you your best chances, then find out.
00:09:18.080 Reach out.
00:09:19.140 Start asking questions from people that know.
00:09:22.080 Totally.
00:09:22.780 Totally, man.
00:09:24.000 Dude, so important.
00:09:24.940 So important.
00:09:25.700 You know, so headline for me, you know, it's funny.
00:09:28.620 And maybe we'll talk about the boxer anyway just because it's like the elephant in the room.
00:09:32.740 But originally, I wasn't going to go that direction.
00:09:36.920 I was going to talk about Venezuela.
00:09:40.460 Like craziness.
00:09:42.620 Yeah, like craziness.
00:09:44.400 And maybe I don't have a call out or I have a thought that's related, but it's a little bit more applicable to all of us.
00:09:53.240 But if you're not being connected and knowing what's going on there, you should, in my opinion.
00:09:59.600 That is a really big deal.
00:10:01.620 They just had their elections.
00:10:04.900 And from the sounds of it, like you had the typical, the opposing party was winning in the polls.
00:10:13.220 And then like overnight, the current president all of a sudden got all these votes and won.
00:10:19.520 And there's riots across the country.
00:10:21.800 Many people feel that it was stolen.
00:10:25.760 I believe if I understand correctly, and I don't even know all the names, but like the opposing candidate is like got kidnapped at one point.
00:10:35.700 I don't know if he's missing, but not good, right?
00:10:40.020 Not good at all.
00:10:41.620 And what's also interesting and not to make everything about America, but I was looking into this, Sean, and I didn't know this.
00:10:49.800 I find this fascinating.
00:10:51.420 So guess how much mendeling, like messing with the elections, the U.S. and the CIA has played in South America.
00:10:59.780 Oh, I bet it's significant.
00:11:01.780 Almost every country we've had our hands in the mix.
00:11:05.720 It is gnarly.
00:11:09.020 And there's evidence now coming out around a major oil reserve in Venezuela, right?
00:11:16.940 Like, dude, like it looks sketchy as all hell.
00:11:22.460 And I'm not saying it's one thing or the other.
00:11:25.520 I'm just saying, like, be aware at least.
00:11:30.100 Let's think critically and just be aware of those surroundings of what's going on down there.
00:11:36.580 It's crazy.
00:11:37.960 It's so crazy.
00:11:39.580 And then what I really wanted to get into is how do we get to this, right?
00:11:44.640 How does Venezuela get into this mindset of a little bit of a communist dictator, communist approach to things?
00:11:53.480 And then we start looking at America and we have people.
00:11:57.380 I brought this up a couple of weeks ago.
00:11:59.020 We have people marching in America with communist flags, promoting communism.
00:12:07.560 And we have governments that are all about rescuing you.
00:12:12.980 We will certainly do.
00:12:14.380 We'll burn through tax dollars.
00:12:16.580 We'll print money if we have to.
00:12:17.980 We'll save you.
00:12:18.800 Don't you worry.
00:12:19.680 And people wanting to be saved.
00:12:22.920 And I'm using those terms particularly because there's this concept of a victim and a rescuer.
00:12:30.960 And it is human nature for us to be a victim.
00:12:33.980 So let me illustrate a couple things.
00:12:36.500 So what does a victim, what's the benefits?
00:12:39.200 Why do we want to be a victim?
00:12:40.620 Because it lacks accountability and responsibility.
00:12:43.640 That's why.
00:12:44.860 Yeah, it's easier.
00:12:45.360 If you're a victim, it's easier.
00:12:47.740 If it goes well, it's because of my great, wonderful president.
00:12:51.880 And most people won't do that, though.
00:12:53.360 If it goes well, they'll be like, oh, it's because of me.
00:12:55.520 And if it doesn't go well, well, it's not my fault, right?
00:12:58.800 It's absolutely someone else's.
00:13:00.540 So I don't take responsibility for things.
00:13:02.920 And I'll give over my sovereignty, my power over to other individuals for the sake of not taking on the full mantle of ownership of my life.
00:13:12.980 So it's an easy pass.
00:13:15.420 Human nature, we will do it.
00:13:17.180 Watch your kids naturally step into victimhood.
00:13:19.940 Look at work.
00:13:20.720 When things go wrong, do people raise their hand and go, hey, you know what?
00:13:23.120 I contributed to that.
00:13:24.260 No, no, no.
00:13:24.860 People go, ah, I did my part.
00:13:26.820 The problem is over here.
00:13:28.180 I got a bad boss, bad company.
00:13:30.680 I have this bad coworker.
00:13:32.480 Those are all blaming.
00:13:34.640 And usually when we blame, you're actually saying they're more responsible than you are.
00:13:41.200 Said another way, you have no power.
00:13:44.280 And you're giving your power over to someone else.
00:13:46.260 That's the victim mindset.
00:13:47.500 And here's the rub.
00:13:49.120 There are plenty of people in this world that will step into being a rescuer for you.
00:13:54.120 They'll go, oh, you know what?
00:13:55.560 I'm mighty all kit.
00:13:57.780 I can save you because it strokes my ego.
00:14:01.540 I'll do this for you.
00:14:03.060 You need me.
00:14:04.620 I need to be needed, wrote.
00:14:06.820 And we will inject ourselves and perpetuate the rescuer.
00:14:10.980 But here's the rub.
00:14:12.440 A rescuer ultimately doesn't value another person's capacity.
00:14:19.100 If you're rescuing someone, it's because you don't value them well enough.
00:14:22.720 You don't believe they can do it.
00:14:25.040 So be mindful.
00:14:26.260 When your government says, I'll rescue you, what they're really saying is, I don't believe you can do it.
00:14:31.780 And you will perpetuate people being in a victim mindset when they think they can't do it and they need you because they never learned.
00:14:42.620 They don't challenge, right?
00:14:44.740 Like I used to always use this joke.
00:14:46.300 Like if we all wanted what's best for our kids, we'd probably all move out of our cush lives.
00:14:52.120 We'd all like get farms and raise our kids on a farm.
00:14:55.620 Why?
00:14:57.180 Because it's in the growth and the challenge of that that they would probably build better, stronger character than being pandered to.
00:15:06.480 So be careful what you ask for.
00:15:09.240 Go ahead, John.
00:15:10.080 The word you just used is what I was going to say.
00:15:15.240 I almost got to the point where I said, I disagree with you, Kip, until you added that heart to it.
00:15:23.220 Because when I think of the rescuers, I don't think of them as rescuing.
00:15:28.860 And as a matter of fact, I think most of them know they can't rescue or save whoever they're trying to save.
00:15:35.160 And so they are just pandering.
00:15:36.880 So for me, that's the word that stuck out in what you said is that even if their intention is good, they know deep down they don't have the capacity to save you.
00:15:46.320 And so you get pandered to by people, even if they have good intention, it's just it's not viable.
00:15:52.760 And so we're being pandered to and somehow we get fooled over and over and over again, expecting that we're going to be saved when the people that are telling us they can save us don't even have the capacity to it.
00:16:06.940 And most of the time they know it regardless of their intention.
00:16:10.440 So I'm not going to go full tinfoil hat like there's some conspiracy in there against you and they know they can't save you or help you.
00:16:17.080 But it's it's all pandering. And so if we understand that, then we also understand that there's something we need to do and not keep waiting for Superman to show up and save us.
00:16:30.480 Totally. And I like what you just wrapped up. That's that's the ultimate sign.
00:16:34.660 If you're listening to us, you're like, well, that's maybe not me or maybe it is or I don't know, maybe you're too ignorant to even consider or be self-aware enough to actually consider this.
00:16:44.480 But but the phrase I always use is if there's any area of your life where you are waiting and hoping you are being a victim.
00:16:54.040 Well, you're waiting and hoping that someone else is going to do something and you're not taking action.
00:16:59.640 So use that as maybe a flag. What area am I waiting and hoping? Am I waiting for my marriage to be great?
00:17:07.120 I'm hoping my wife will do something before I do something. Then then then you're not making it happen.
00:17:12.060 You're not saying, hey, this is important. I'm going to find a way and driving it forward.
00:17:16.920 You're not owning it. And so I would look for areas where you're blaming others.
00:17:21.520 Right. Or you're waiting and hoping for a solution. What are you going to say, Sean?
00:17:25.240 Well, I was going to say in the case of Venezuela, there's another like I have a really good friend who's from Venezuela and he's told me for, you know, a couple of decades.
00:17:34.500 The issues that they have there and their government and everything else and how much he just loves being an American citizen and and not being there anymore.
00:17:44.080 But obviously, he has family there and extended family and his wife's family is there and and, you know, all of all of this, which is hard for him to manage.
00:17:55.680 But one of the things that he told me a while ago is about 10 years ago and is not to try and connect this to gun and gun issues and things like that.
00:18:04.680 But that's what happened about 10 years ago is they they banned the ability to get new firearm licenses in Venezuela.
00:18:13.280 And about six years ago, they had a giant confiscation where I think they confiscated something like 15,000 firearms in Venezuela.
00:18:22.560 And so now here we are with these this tampered, quote unquote, election.
00:18:27.420 And you were talking about riots and things like that.
00:18:30.300 And, you know, but they're rioting with what?
00:18:34.400 They're rioting with hands tied.
00:18:37.240 And who's controlling the police?
00:18:39.060 Yeah. And so I think you said in at least having an understanding of what's going on in these other places.
00:18:46.680 Well, that just happened there.
00:18:49.160 Well, what if that happens here?
00:18:50.800 And I felt this tension.
00:18:52.480 I'm glad you brought this up because I felt this tension already with that Kamala now being the running person, which, by the way, no one voted for.
00:19:00.360 And and now she's running and they're thinking like, wow, she might have a chance at winning where literally a couple of weeks ago when Trump was shot, they said, well, it's wrapped up zero chance now for the Democrats.
00:19:14.660 And now people are saying maybe there's a chance.
00:19:17.340 And so in a week, it can go from zero chance to maybe a chance.
00:19:21.740 It feels like they're already kind of manipulating this thing.
00:19:24.780 And so what if what if there's a manipulation?
00:19:27.560 What if it doesn't go the way that our country, the majority of our country wants?
00:19:31.980 What if we start rioting?
00:19:33.760 And the difference here is we're loaded with firearms.
00:19:37.880 And so then what what happens?
00:19:40.500 And so we're talking about getting our house in order when we were talking about the stock market, I think.
00:19:45.740 And not to try and be fear mongering or anything like that, because that's not what I'm trying to do.
00:19:50.140 I think it's just important that we pay attention and that we start just making sure that fundamentally we're sound in different areas of our lives so that if these things do happen, we don't have to get caught up in a sense that, you know, now maybe our family is at risk in any capacity.
00:20:10.740 If we're just not ready for maybe the worst happening is what I'm saying.
00:20:16.900 Well, and here's the perfect segue.
00:20:18.320 Well, I wanted to get the boxer in.
00:20:20.660 And this is a perfect segue is you we don't know.
00:20:24.560 Right.
00:20:25.060 Like I always find I find knowledge interesting and I'm not I'm not saying anything right around moon landing, for instance.
00:20:34.500 Right.
00:20:34.920 But people will be like, that's I know that they'll go, oh, I know we landed on the moon.
00:20:39.800 How do you know?
00:20:40.740 Well, I watched the video or I was told that's not knowing that's not knowing at all that that's you regurgitating what you've heard.
00:20:48.300 So in this space of like beat beat critically think there's not enough critical thinking happening and people regurgitate knowledge as their own.
00:20:58.320 And so they'll read a headline and like, oh, that's true.
00:21:00.740 Is it right?
00:21:02.400 Is it that simple?
00:21:03.580 Is it more complex?
00:21:05.160 Is there alternatives?
00:21:06.500 Does the media want you to think one thing on purpose?
00:21:11.120 Is there intentions?
00:21:12.780 Like we got to critically think.
00:21:15.100 And a good example is more complex, by the way.
00:21:17.780 Yeah.
00:21:17.920 And even Venezuela is probably way more complex than just as simple as, you know, broad elections.
00:21:26.660 It's probably way more complex.
00:21:28.900 There's probably different world powers playing in play.
00:21:31.920 I wouldn't be surprised that the CIA is involved to some extent.
00:21:36.040 Like, who knows?
00:21:37.360 I mean, the fact that we've been involved in almost every country in South America and their election process.
00:21:42.620 Why?
00:21:42.940 What all of a sudden changed now?
00:21:44.640 Right.
00:21:44.880 Like, look at human behavior, the idea that most people will practice unrighteous dominion.
00:21:51.940 I think that's a truth, a principle that is transcended.
00:21:55.620 And we need to critically think.
00:21:57.900 And the boxer in the Olympics is a good example of this, man.
00:22:00.780 Like, I fell, I fell exactly into what I'm exactly talking about right now is I saw a headline of, I think the headline was boxer with XY chromosome or boxer who failed gender test at world championship beats woman in Olympics.
00:22:18.820 Right.
00:22:19.620 What do I jump to immediately?
00:22:21.800 Right.
00:22:22.340 This is a dude, a trans dude in the Olympics and unfair beating up this woman.
00:22:28.800 And typically, I, and of course, that's my bias, right?
00:22:31.560 I'm against, and I didn't even know if it's, see, I didn't even know my language.
00:22:35.880 Is it transgender male or female?
00:22:37.380 I didn't even know.
00:22:38.500 I'm against transgenders in, in competing in certain sports.
00:22:44.040 I think it's an unfair advantage.
00:22:45.640 So based upon that context, when I had read that headline, what did I jump to?
00:22:50.380 Immediately, dude, this, some dude beating up girls.
00:22:53.200 That's evil.
00:22:54.100 That's the, absolutely.
00:22:55.100 And then come to find out, and we were talking about this earlier, person was born a girl.
00:23:00.560 It's actually not a gender.
00:23:02.380 It's not a man.
00:23:04.060 It's actually a girl, but has some genetic XY chromosome things going on that kind of makes this a lot more difficult, right?
00:23:16.780 To have a conversation or an opinion about.
00:23:19.420 And ultra rare too.
00:23:21.100 Ultra rare condition.
00:23:22.860 Totally.
00:23:23.280 Which, okay, what you were talking about, where's that line?
00:23:27.200 How do you drive?
00:23:27.680 Yeah, and then you start getting into a dopey and, yeah, like, dude, this isn't so simple, right?
00:23:34.380 And it starts getting a little bit more complicated.
00:23:37.280 Now, you were saying, I interrupted you.
00:23:40.040 No, that was it.
00:23:40.780 I mean, it does become a doping issue as well.
00:23:43.500 And it's like, okay, if they need that to function normally, they need testosterone as a woman.
00:23:49.520 But then how do you justify that and say, well, it's okay for her to take testosterone, but it's not okay for any other athlete to do it because, you know, they can't be on steroids.
00:24:02.620 So, again, where's that line drawn?
00:24:06.380 And much more complicated.
00:24:09.240 And either way, people could be up in arms about it.
00:24:13.940 Maybe they should be.
00:24:14.980 It is the Olympics.
00:24:15.920 Maybe it does need to be a little cleaner and more straightforward if people are competing.
00:24:22.660 And it's supposed to be fair.
00:24:26.060 But, you know, just like in anything competitive, there is and always will be somebody trying to fudge the system, someone trying to get around it, someone coming up with their story or backstory,
00:24:39.920 or whatever it is, to give them an edge or an advantage.
00:24:45.340 And honestly, I don't think any of us could know their intention or what it is or whatever.
00:24:52.500 And, you know, but the media did what it does and got people against each other.
00:25:03.580 And, again, I think we just, at the end of the day, how does this affect me?
00:25:10.280 How does it affect my family?
00:25:11.720 What can I know about it?
00:25:12.920 How much time should I give it?
00:25:15.160 Because we probably have way bigger fish to fry in our own homes.
00:25:21.880 Yep.
00:25:22.860 Totally.
00:25:23.520 That's a good point.
00:25:24.580 That's a good way to wrap it up.
00:25:26.140 All right, man.
00:25:26.580 Let's get into some questions from our brothers in the Iron Council.
00:25:29.380 All right, Jimmy Hellwood, navigating a partner with an explosive temper, explosive temper.
00:25:39.060 I saw this one and immediately, and I don't want to sound like I'm picking on him, but my immediate thought was that didn't just come out of nowhere.
00:25:53.960 That explosive temper did not just show up.
00:25:57.300 So if that's your partner that you've chosen, you knew that.
00:26:02.000 And maybe that was exciting to you when you started the relationship.
00:26:05.020 Maybe that fire, that spiciness was something that you liked and that was attractive and that turned you on a little bit.
00:26:16.660 And now, as you're deeper into the relationship, you're realizing, you know, there's, with that fire, things get burned.
00:26:27.660 And you're starting to feel that burn a little bit more than you did in the beginning when it was exciting.
00:26:32.940 And so, for me, I just think, at the beginning of this relationship, at the beginning of this partnership, did you assess if that was a deal breaker, if that was okay, or if it wasn't?
00:26:50.720 And did you navigate how you were going to show up if that was something that you were going to accept as part of their personality?
00:27:00.020 Or did you think you could change that?
00:27:01.880 And I think most likely it's the latter, but again, without enough information to understand it, that's just where I tend to head, is that this is not a new thing.
00:27:13.700 And how long has it been a thing and what have been your conversations to either help them deal better with those stresses, with those reactions, and or what are you doing to deal better with it when it happens?
00:27:36.340 Yeah, that's what I was leaning towards is, you know, how's this, one thing's for sure, you're not going to be able to deal with anything difficult, kind of goes, it's kind of starting to become the theme of this call, right?
00:27:51.100 Get your house in order, mentally.
00:27:53.220 So, you're not going to be able to deal with an explosive temper if you're reactionary to it, if you're flying off the cuff and you're angry about it.
00:28:03.180 Because now you're operating from a place of emotion and not logic either.
00:28:08.200 So, make sure, one, that you're in a position where you're like, oh, okay, yeah, I get it.
00:28:13.920 Like, she's upset.
00:28:15.520 Now I can have boundaries.
00:28:17.120 Now I can have a conversation and keep my cool, right?
00:28:20.680 And not being triggered by the explosive temper.
00:28:25.240 So, that's number one.
00:28:26.900 Anyway, because if your mindset's not right, everything else is just going to, this is all going to go to trap real quick.
00:28:33.180 And a handbasket, if you're not managing your own emotions.
00:28:38.040 But let's assume, yeah, go ahead.
00:28:40.140 I was going to say, now, if there, I think there maybe is an exception.
00:28:45.360 And that exception is, I don't know how old he is or how old she is.
00:28:50.560 But if she's in the range of menopause or paramenopause, that could be an issue as well, where it did come out of nowhere.
00:29:01.900 And now she's kind of losing her mind.
00:29:03.580 But, again, the conversations about paramenopause, because a lot of times it's happening to women and they don't understand it.
00:29:10.020 And they maybe tie it to other health-related issues in their lives or trying to figure it out and navigate it.
00:29:15.520 And it's just as scary and confusing and frustrating for them as it is for you.
00:29:20.480 And so, depending on their age, maybe that's a discussion that you have.
00:29:25.480 And, you know, not in the moment when they're heated, but in between of, hey, have you thought about this?
00:29:32.340 And maybe we start investigating, you know, some ways to help with a hormonal imbalance or whatever it may be there.
00:29:43.520 Which is a, it's an uncomfortable conversation.
00:29:46.320 But, again, depending on the age, maybe that's a possibility.
00:29:49.260 Well, and that's number two, right?
00:29:50.920 So, I think, number one, you need to get your mindset right, your mindset, regardless of them.
00:29:57.060 Number two, understand the issue.
00:30:00.580 Where is the explosive temper coming from?
00:30:02.960 What's the thought process?
00:30:04.360 Have some empathy.
00:30:05.420 Critically think.
00:30:06.680 What's the reasoning for it?
00:30:08.400 Whatever.
00:30:09.880 Is it physical, right?
00:30:11.700 Is it mental?
00:30:12.500 Is it something that you're doing or whatever, right?
00:30:15.040 And so, you need to understand the gap.
00:30:17.300 And then, number three is having a conversation around it.
00:30:21.420 And I would be very careful how you approach this, right?
00:30:25.140 It's like, you know, this isn't a scenario by which you come to the table and you're like, hey, you need to change and or, right?
00:30:31.960 Like, don't threaten.
00:30:32.960 Don't create uncertainty.
00:30:35.020 Approach it from a caring mindset that like, hey, do you like to have an explosive temper and lose your temper?
00:30:42.220 I'm assuming you don't.
00:30:43.660 No, I don't.
00:30:44.280 I don't like it when I feel this way.
00:30:45.700 I agree.
00:30:46.900 It's not really ideal for us as a couple.
00:30:49.860 What can we do?
00:30:51.440 How can I support you?
00:30:53.440 What things, what triggers this?
00:30:55.940 What adjustments can I make to support you in it, right?
00:30:59.100 We all have struggles.
00:31:00.100 I get it.
00:31:01.020 Totally understand.
00:31:02.240 But I want you to be happy.
00:31:04.480 And I want you to be in a great mindset.
00:31:06.100 And so, let's work on it together as a couple.
00:31:08.640 But you're not going to be able to do that well without the mindset.
00:31:11.180 First, have some empathy.
00:31:13.360 Because if you're not understanding where it's coming from, then everything else is just going to be probably poor implemented tactics.
00:31:20.660 And then implement a strategy moving forward from the perspective of support, not from the perspective of change.
00:31:31.120 Yeah, I like that a lot.
00:31:34.340 All right.
00:31:34.600 Joshua Collins, he jokes.
00:31:38.300 Sorry, he's joking around about some stuff here.
00:31:40.940 All right.
00:31:41.220 But if there was a singular advice you could give men today, what would it be?
00:31:48.020 Man, these are the worst questions.
00:31:51.660 Just the one advice.
00:31:54.400 That's the one secret.
00:31:56.560 Maybe what's one thing on your mind?
00:31:58.780 Maybe it doesn't have to be the one thing.
00:32:00.240 But what's something that's present for you of late, Sean?
00:32:02.380 I mean, if I were to give one thing, it would be to keep growing.
00:32:11.840 If I was going to give any advice to a man, it's to keep growing.
00:32:16.760 It's to keep improving.
00:32:18.320 Keep being better.
00:32:20.080 I think we get trapped in this.
00:32:21.680 One of my favorite quotes has always been Dr. Martin Luther King, who said, most men die at the age of 25.
00:32:27.320 We just don't get around to bearing them until they're 65.
00:32:30.120 And what he meant by that is most men stop dreaming.
00:32:36.960 They stop growing.
00:32:38.340 They stop improving.
00:32:40.040 And honestly, I don't think it happens in their 20s.
00:32:43.240 I think it happens in their teens.
00:32:45.160 When you get into high school, middle school, younger kids think they can do anything.
00:32:51.420 They can conquer the world.
00:32:52.500 They can be an astronaut.
00:32:53.320 They can be the president.
00:32:54.280 They can be a scientist.
00:32:55.900 They could be whatever.
00:32:56.680 And then you get into school and people start telling you, well, that's unrealistic.
00:33:00.920 That's hard.
00:33:02.520 That's not maybe you don't have the grades for that.
00:33:05.680 And they start planting these seeds of doubt.
00:33:08.940 And then people start settling.
00:33:11.300 And then they just say, well, that doesn't happen to people like us.
00:33:14.420 That doesn't happen to people with our backgrounds.
00:33:16.260 That doesn't happen.
00:33:16.920 They start accepting these things that they're being told that are false.
00:33:22.600 But they're just accepting that, okay, well, I guess why continue to try to be better if it doesn't matter anyways?
00:33:30.500 And so my advice would be don't accept any of that crap.
00:33:34.220 If there's something that you want to try or do or push towards, hey, get on the train that's going to at least get you in the vicinity.
00:33:45.180 Start reading good books, listening to podcasts, surrounding yourself with people that have those things, that do those things, changing your environment, cutting out negatives.
00:33:57.000 I mean, there's just the list goes on and on and on.
00:33:59.240 But all of it's connected to growth mindset.
00:34:03.280 Just don't settle.
00:34:05.280 Don't stop dying.
00:34:07.420 Another one of my favorite quotes is from Lou Holtz.
00:34:09.860 He said, if you're not growing, you're dying.
00:34:11.960 So keep growing.
00:34:13.980 Yeah, I love it, man.
00:34:15.740 You know, I'd lean in the same vein.
00:34:19.540 The advice I would get, and it's not advice.
00:34:22.840 It's really just an ask, is just get present to your impact.
00:34:27.440 I mean, the reality of it is a lot of the difficulties and struggles we experience, that your kids will experience, that your family will experience, you can make a difference.
00:34:40.260 And I think we play small.
00:34:42.580 I think way too many men play small.
00:34:46.940 If you want to use a visual analogy, they're on the court watching the game, but they're in the stands watching the game.
00:34:55.960 They're not on the court playing.
00:34:57.440 I agree.
00:34:59.060 And it's unfortunate.
00:35:01.620 And I think we need to get present to the impact, the impact that you have on people.
00:35:07.460 And by the way, I think some impact you won't ever get credit for.
00:35:11.380 I realized that over the last year.
00:35:15.480 And it's almost a compliment.
00:35:17.740 It hurts the ego a little bit.
00:35:19.280 Maybe it keeps me humble.
00:35:20.600 But I think sometimes the impact, people won't give you credit for it.
00:35:26.520 But you're making a difference.
00:35:29.160 And we need to get present to it.
00:35:31.300 And then use that to ensure that we're living a life worth living.
00:35:39.560 Yeah.
00:35:40.200 I love it.
00:35:41.820 All right.
00:35:42.160 Brandon has a tough question here.
00:35:43.760 A little bit lengthy.
00:35:44.960 There's kind of two parts to this.
00:35:46.100 So I'll read off the first part.
00:35:48.160 So Brandon Clement, military guy.
00:35:51.300 If you had to only do one cycle of chemo and it reduced your chances of relapse by 3% to 10% in two years versus a 20% to 50% with just monitoring with a 40% chance of cardiovascular disease.
00:36:09.620 Or change to a radically healthy diet and lifestyle change without side effects and monitor the cancer could potentially come back, but not necessarily.
00:36:20.980 If relapse occurs, more cycles of chemo would have to be administered.
00:36:25.060 Which would you choose?
00:36:27.320 I believe in God and I want to test my faith, but I also want to discern wisdom.
00:36:32.360 And he has another part of the question, but I'll let you answer that part first.
00:36:35.920 I had a couple thoughts and I saw this one too.
00:36:38.700 And so the first thing that I don't understand, not have ever being in the military and understanding how that works with the VA when you have certain issues and how it affects your pension down the road.
00:36:54.900 If you do or don't take recommendations for your health and continuing to get your benefits.
00:37:01.720 I don't know if it affects that in any way.
00:37:04.200 I think a lot of your action that you take should consider that in your decision.
00:37:16.280 And then with that, I think it's not as straightforward as which one sounds better.
00:37:25.720 I think you need to have a conversation with your wife, if you have kids even.
00:37:32.040 I mean, there's so many more questions that I would have in helping you navigate this.
00:37:40.140 But now in line with that, if I'm just looking at the chemo or monitoring or lifestyle change, it sounds like it's kind of stage one because you have these different options.
00:37:55.500 Personally, I would go with more of a holistic approach and go with the lifestyle change, the extra work.
00:38:07.400 It's, you know, some people would probably say chemo and lifestyle change.
00:38:11.780 That's actually my tendency is to be like, bang it all out.
00:38:15.420 Lifestyle change, chemo, just attack it.
00:38:18.500 Do it all.
00:38:19.380 Yeah.
00:38:19.660 Yeah.
00:38:21.520 Honestly, I tend more towards lifestyle change.
00:38:24.640 Do that.
00:38:25.500 In the meantime, researching some different holistic options that may help subside it.
00:38:31.680 And, and then go from there, having dealt with this with my mom and, you know, she went through, I went through that with her and, and we weighed the options and then ultimately left it up to here.
00:38:45.280 And so what I'll finish with, and this probably isn't any help to him, but what I will say is at the end of the day, he has to make the decision and he has to accept that for himself and for the people in his life as his decision.
00:39:05.760 So don't, earlier we were talking about looking for someone to save you and looking for someone to give you that advice, whatever it is.
00:39:13.160 Maybe you're looking for your wife to tell you what she wants you to do.
00:39:18.000 And a lot of times people do that because then they say, well, if it doesn't work, then I have somebody to blame.
00:39:24.020 Just know at the end of the day, make this your decision for your sake and for everyone else around you, because if it doesn't work, it's, you don't want any of them to have the thought of, man, I should have, I should have pushed him more.
00:39:39.400 I should have made him do this.
00:39:41.020 I should have, you know, been a little louder and all of that.
00:39:44.180 And so just make sure that it's clear that after it's all said and done, the decision is yours and everyone that's affected by that decision has to accept that, including yourself.
00:39:58.520 Yeah.
00:39:59.200 Yeah.
00:39:59.400 Don't put that on her.
00:40:00.280 That'd be unfair.
00:40:00.980 You know, and this is tough when it becomes, it's really easy to have that opinion sometimes until you're faced with these kind of hard decisions.
00:40:10.580 Not just really tough.
00:40:11.780 I think it's impossible.
00:40:13.620 Yeah.
00:40:14.040 Yeah.
00:40:14.440 It's impossible.
00:40:14.960 So first off, like, you know, Brandon, I feel you, man, like super difficult circumstance.
00:40:21.680 And hopefully you find confidence and peace in the direction that you go and that things go well.
00:40:30.980 My thoughts on this are really rooted in what my wife did.
00:40:36.080 So Asia ended up with melanoma on her back, ended up cutting a massive chunk out of her back.
00:40:44.260 It actually spread to her lymph nodes.
00:40:46.760 This was all earlier this year.
00:40:50.260 And so she was stage three, almost stage four.
00:40:56.980 And same thing, right?
00:40:59.100 We go in and we had the same exact conversation.
00:41:02.340 They checked her lymph nodes.
00:41:03.720 It spread to her lymph nodes.
00:41:04.880 The doctor recommended therapy and we're like, give us the breakdown.
00:41:09.260 And they're like, well, therapy is great.
00:41:11.040 It reduces your chances.
00:41:12.320 Almost the same here.
00:41:13.300 I think five to 7% reduction of coming back.
00:41:17.980 What are the side effects?
00:41:19.420 It could affect your organs, all these other things.
00:41:22.900 And here's the part that really like resonated with me.
00:41:26.960 We were talking about, I brought it up to the doctor and he was great.
00:41:30.820 Like he gave us all the raw numbers for us to consider for ourselves.
00:41:34.380 You could tell what his opinion was in this example.
00:41:39.300 I said, so we asked him, we're like, hey, how about dietary adjustments?
00:41:44.980 Like what we're doing on a day-to-day that would reduce our chances and of it coming back and everything else.
00:41:52.860 And his response was, well, you know, I mean, you don't want to like disrupt your life and not have ice cream and sugar and stuff.
00:42:02.940 Like you want to live a good life to like, he thought literally talking to my wife and I, that us eliminating sugar from our diets would be a stupid idea almost.
00:42:18.000 And it would just be too much to ask of anybody.
00:42:21.400 And I'm like, you're crazy, right?
00:42:24.760 Like the fact that he wasn't almost promoting that over just taking treatment.
00:42:32.160 I'm like, I was, I was blown.
00:42:34.940 And so absolutely.
00:42:37.040 I lean in the direction of lifestyle change.
00:42:40.420 Well, let me ask you this, Kip.
00:42:43.820 Did you, did you get a second opinion then?
00:42:48.780 Did you, what was your?
00:42:52.320 Yeah.
00:42:52.700 I mean, we're not just a second opinion.
00:42:55.300 Like Asia and I just went hog town, right?
00:42:58.620 Like the hard floor into other options.
00:43:02.120 Yes.
00:43:02.560 And I mean, that's what I was over anything and everything and, and come to find out we're like, you know, it's not worth the risk.
00:43:11.960 The, the, the treatment is not worth the risk of the potential side effects.
00:43:17.800 And you know what?
00:43:18.700 We should probably adjusting our lifestyle and our diets anyway, because that stuff's crap for our bodies.
00:43:24.100 And, you know, let's, let's give your body the fighting chance to do its job really, really well by being more healthy.
00:43:32.560 And, and, and she still goes into scans, I think every three to six months.
00:43:39.000 And those are stressful because we're not like, you're just waiting for something to show up.
00:43:44.820 And we'll continue down that path.
00:43:46.960 And so that's where we're leaning is more in that area.
00:43:51.140 But I think most importantly, anything, obviously don't rely on Sean and I, in regards to how you handle your cancer, you know, we're, we're not experts.
00:43:58.940 But, but I think it goes back to the believing in yourself, what's best for your body versus what's easy getting second opinions and then you owning it.
00:44:13.300 I think what you said, Sean, I think is spot on don't outsource this to anybody else.
00:44:17.860 Not even your doctor.
00:44:18.840 If you don't feel good about it, then don't do it.
00:44:21.780 Like follow your, you come to the conclusion, don't outsource it to your wife or your doctor or anyone else.
00:44:29.100 By the way, interesting note, when Asia went to the dermatologist, when she was bothered about an area on her back, guess what the dermatologist said about the spot that ended up having melanoma?
00:44:42.700 It's fine.
00:44:43.420 And she said, Oh no, no, no, it's fine.
00:44:47.960 And, and Asia went, no, I don't like it.
00:44:50.700 It bothers me.
00:44:53.040 She made that call.
00:44:54.240 It bothers me.
00:44:54.920 I don't like it.
00:44:55.740 Take it out anyway.
00:44:56.960 Test it anyway.
00:44:58.920 She listened to herself.
00:45:00.680 So listen to your body.
00:45:02.780 Yeah.
00:45:03.340 Gain some necessary knowledge, make some adjustments.
00:45:05.440 Now I do want to call this one part out.
00:45:08.500 And, and, and Sean, I'm assuming you'll have an, an opinion about this.
00:45:11.780 I believe in God and I want to test my faith, but I also want to discern wisdom.
00:45:19.500 Any additional thoughts that you would add to our response based upon that statement?
00:45:24.940 Yeah.
00:45:25.180 I mean, it's, it's, we've all heard the story of the guy in the flood.
00:45:28.800 God sends him a rowboat, a tugboat, a helicopter, you know, and the guy ends up drowning in his house because he's waiting for God to save him.
00:45:42.060 And then he gets to the pearly gates and he's like, God, why didn't you save me?
00:45:45.080 And he's like, I sent you a rowboat, a tugboat, and a helicopter.
00:45:47.520 Um, you know, like you have the resources around you to do research, um, again, to trust your gut, to have those conversations, um, and simultaneously pray, pray for the, that spirit to help guide you in those decisions.
00:46:03.520 And when you feel it in your gut, it's whatever's going to feel right.
00:46:07.840 I don't think regardless, whatever your decision is that you could ever be 100% certain in that decision, but you will know what feels better and go with that and trust it.
00:46:19.400 And, you know, the rest is up to God.
00:46:23.200 Yeah.
00:46:24.600 Love it.
00:46:25.520 Okay.
00:46:26.220 Bobby, right.
00:46:29.180 How did navigate watching your father's body fall apart and deal with not being able to do what he loves, yard work, gardening, and et cetera?
00:46:39.880 Yeah, I saw this one too.
00:46:41.200 And there's, again, it's not enough information for why, but I, the only thing I can attach it to is when my mom got her cancer.
00:46:49.400 It's on her face.
00:46:50.240 It was the same thing.
00:46:51.300 Her favorite thing to do is go out and be with people and to laugh and to, you know, and, but she, she literally looked like those zombie movies when they shoot a zombie in the face and like half the face is, you know, like rotting flesh, like ripped off.
00:47:05.420 That's what her face looked like.
00:47:07.080 So she had to walk around is happened to be during COVID.
00:47:09.900 So she would walk around with a mask and at least have that.
00:47:13.220 And people couldn't tell as much, but it, she knew it stopped her.
00:47:17.080 It stopped her ability.
00:47:18.460 She, she, like, she didn't want to go out and see people because of it.
00:47:21.280 Yeah.
00:47:21.740 And then she couldn't talk physically.
00:47:23.580 She could all of those things.
00:47:25.300 So like the reason for existence and, and being around people and being happy and, and, and laughing and those things was gone.
00:47:34.660 And that was really difficult.
00:47:35.680 And so the next best thing I could do is really whatever I could do to help support her and make her feel a little bit better.
00:47:44.760 Um, but I couldn't make the cancer go away.
00:47:49.240 I couldn't make that difficulty go away.
00:47:52.840 All I could be was around a little bit more to try and make her laugh, but at least make her happier.
00:48:01.020 Her knowing she was loved and being supported and that we were doing what we could, but honestly, that's their own battle to fight.
00:48:14.100 And all you can do is, is, and have those conversations.
00:48:18.020 I would ask her, Hey, do you want me around a little bit more?
00:48:21.480 Do you want me, you know, I, I, I ended up putting her in a beach house just because we had the capacity to be able to do that.
00:48:28.400 And so the, her favorite place to be on the planet was this specific strip of beach in California near where we lived and grew up.
00:48:38.660 And, and I got her into a couple of different beach houses on that strip, you know, for it paid for all of it for almost a year.
00:48:47.880 And, um, and she loved that, you know, cause if she was going to be miserable, at least she could watch the sunsets in the most beautiful place in her opinion on the planet.
00:48:58.400 Um, that she loved.
00:48:59.980 And so that helped a little bit, you know, and, and at the end of the day, I can feel good about that.
00:49:07.340 And then visiting her as much as I could and being around and supporting her and taking her to all of her things she had to be at at the hospital and through her treatments and, and all of that.
00:49:20.360 So I think, you know, that combined with having all the conversations now, if you're watching his body deteriorate, I don't know what that means.
00:49:29.560 I don't know if it's just physical, if it's mental, but, um, be willing to have the uncomfortable conversations.
00:49:37.380 Now, if there's things to get off your chest, things you've always wanted to tell him and never did just do it now before, cause it's only going to get harder.
00:49:45.020 Yeah.
00:49:46.080 And if you don't, you'll regret it.
00:49:48.420 Yeah.
00:49:49.160 I mean, my dad, my dad went from his cognitive decline was like two weeks.
00:49:58.320 That's so crazy.
00:50:00.120 It was just super fast.
00:50:01.540 So, yeah, don't, don't, don't, don't wait and hope like we were saying earlier, you know, one thing that comes to mind here on this question, um, for, for Bobby is what does your father want?
00:50:16.580 Like if I'm going to go through hardship, the number one thing I'd want is for my kids to learn from it for them to be better off because of it.
00:50:28.340 That way it's not in vain.
00:50:30.760 So your, your dad dealing with this difficult part of his life, don't let it be a waste.
00:50:37.020 So you ask, how do I navigate?
00:50:38.940 You learn, you look at it and you go, man, this is life.
00:50:44.360 It's going to end.
00:50:46.220 We all die.
00:50:47.540 And sometimes our exit is not going to be perfect.
00:50:51.280 Our ex is going to be dirty.
00:50:52.700 It's not going to, it's going to be messy.
00:50:54.540 It's going to be abrupt.
00:50:55.980 It might be long drawn out, like our exits all look different.
00:51:02.900 And so I would ask you, Bobby, what can you learn from this experience and how do you become a better man or having to deal with it?
00:51:12.080 And that's how you make sure that your dad's struggle here is not being wasted.
00:51:17.340 There's a lot that you could really get present to, and this could be highly, in my opinion, could be highly transformative to you as an individual by helping your dad navigate this part of his life.
00:51:34.080 Absolutely.
00:51:35.160 No doubt in my mind.
00:51:36.240 Hard, but wonderful opportunity to grow.
00:51:41.600 I love that.
00:51:43.320 Todd Martinez, how does a sovereign man navigate the election season?
00:51:49.660 I know enough to stay out of arguments that go nowhere.
00:51:53.520 However, I also believe keeping a silent majority is how we've gotten so far off of our values here in the U.S.
00:52:00.380 Win and win not to speak up.
00:52:03.800 Or when and win not to.
00:52:10.300 Yeah, win and win not to.
00:52:11.620 I read that wrong.
00:52:12.320 Sorry.
00:52:13.160 Yeah.
00:52:13.700 So it's, for me, always comes down to less talking and more doing, no matter what.
00:52:22.240 And so, yeah, we're coming into an election cycle.
00:52:25.760 But with that, we're also, like, we just had a local election here last week.
00:52:30.880 And so, are you voting in your local elections, in your community elections, for your school board, for your local council?
00:52:40.740 Are you in tune with who is more in alignment with your values?
00:52:46.280 Because as frustrating as everything is, you're honestly going to be more affected at the local level.
00:52:51.880 And then you do your part.
00:52:55.620 You get out and vote.
00:52:56.840 And now, as far as those conversations, they get a little heavier and more heated in an election time because of what the media does and, you know, the commercials you're going to see and all of the stuff that gets people riled up.
00:53:12.060 But don't leave those conversations to just now.
00:53:17.180 So be willing to, for the next three years, three and a half years after the election, to continue having those conversations.
00:53:26.740 But then also, how are you showing up in your community?
00:53:29.980 How are you showing up in your family?
00:53:32.420 How are you showing up in your environment that you're in, in your workplace?
00:53:37.140 Whatever it is, wherever these conversations are being had.
00:53:39.740 And back to what we were talking about earlier, if I was to give any one singular advice to someone, it's to keep growing.
00:53:47.420 And if you're that guy, and if you're committed to growth and helping others and serving and being the best version of yourself, people are going to take notice of that.
00:53:57.300 In whatever the capacity is.
00:53:59.140 And so if you are somebody that they respect and that they look up to and that they see as putting in the work and not just talking.
00:54:08.580 And I think that's the challenge, is too many people just talk about these things.
00:54:13.540 But if you're out there actually doing it, being better, serving people, serving the community, serving the people within your environment.
00:54:23.240 You're, you're, you're being a good father, a good husband, a good, you know, brother, sister, coworker, whatever it is.
00:54:32.880 And then when you do speak to whatever it is, it just, it holds a little more validity with the people that you're around.
00:54:42.440 And so I think that's more important than the conversations themselves, is how we're showing up in our environment so that when we have the conversations, it doesn't become just an argument.
00:54:54.640 People actually have a little more respect, maybe a little more empathy, maybe a little more willing to listen because of who you are.
00:55:03.560 Yeah, are you in a position of influence and running your mouth is not influence, just noise.
00:55:11.360 You know, it's interesting.
00:55:12.500 I, I, I agree with, I used to agree.
00:55:15.640 I'm challenging a thought, my own thought, actually, as I read this, because he wrote, I believing in keeping to the silent majority is how we gotten so far off our values is the silent majority.
00:55:27.240 I actually wonder if that's true, actually, now that I think about it, because this implies that the change in our value system as a country is just a result of people speaking out and not speaking out.
00:55:42.520 And I actually wonder that that's not really what transforms my value system is popularity, what's most common, or was it how I was raised, right?
00:55:58.280 And so I wonder if we've gotten off our values, per se, if we want to use that term, by how we were raised this past generation.
00:56:07.900 And it's more around the generations and their homes and how people were raised.
00:56:15.100 And we're now seeing the result of it than it is really, oh, well, there's less Facebook posts around this.
00:56:21.040 And that's why the silent majority, you know what I mean, is losing out because they don't post on social media as much around and speak out about.
00:56:29.340 It's like, well, is that really, that's called popularity.
00:56:32.160 I don't know if that's rooted in our value system.
00:56:34.340 I think our values is, is in the home.
00:56:36.480 And, and I think that, I don't know if I agree, actually, I used to, but I'm just now challenging my thought around this, that, that still, I think the greatest opportunity here is not to be louder.
00:56:49.280 It's just to make sure that our homes are in order and that we're raising kids that have a growth mindset.
00:56:54.540 That we're raising kids that critically think that our influence in our neighborhoods is from a position of influence and positiveness.
00:57:02.680 And, and, and that's really what we're, that's really where the change is.
00:57:07.860 It's not people speaking out or against, I think that's just, I don't know, that, that seems a lot like just tumbleweeds, blowing tumbleweeds around.
00:57:20.320 If, if, if we're really focused on how our silence or how loud we are about something, I don't know.
00:57:27.960 What's your thoughts?
00:57:29.440 It's, I, I, I think that's perfect.
00:57:32.880 It's, it's, I've heard the quote a bunch of times.
00:57:37.340 I don't know where it comes from, but, um, I can't hear a word you're saying because what you do speak so loudly.
00:57:44.740 Again, I think that's the most important part of everything we're, we're talking about is, you know, just, just show up, be somebody that if you're somebody of influence that demands respect because of how you serve the people around you, that's going to carry into all your conversations, regardless of the topic.
00:58:11.400 Okay. Well, and it's, and it goes back something that Jordan Peterson, or at least I've snagged from him is like the importance of like getting your own house in order.
00:58:20.980 Because the reality of it is, is most of us will, will navigate this election season, getting fired up.
00:58:27.340 Oh, I'm going to, man, I'm, I'm fired up for my candidate and, and I'm going to do something about it.
00:58:32.680 Meanwhile, my relationship with my kids sucks.
00:58:35.820 My relationship with my wife is mediocre.
00:58:38.820 My job is miserable.
00:58:40.560 I'm a victim and the office, the people I work with can't stand me because I'm negative all the time.
00:58:46.120 And then you have an opinion that you need to rise up and care about who gets elected to get your own shit in order.
00:58:54.520 First, you're in zero position to influence anybody of anything because you're still working on you.
00:59:00.420 And even your body, how's your health, how's your spirituality?
00:59:04.140 Oh, not, not, not checked, not checked.
00:59:07.360 Maybe do that first.
00:59:08.660 And, and not, not just do that first because it's undeserving.
00:59:12.740 You're not ready.
00:59:14.920 You're not ready to have greater impact if you're still addressing the impact of yourself.
00:59:22.120 The best testing ground and area of growth for you, if you really want to make a difference in the world, is getting yourself in order.
00:59:34.800 That is how you learn how to do that for other people.
00:59:37.920 And if you're still struggling in that place, I think, I honestly do believe this.
00:59:43.380 It's not that like your opinions aren't as valuable.
00:59:46.720 They just won't be as impactful.
00:59:48.460 And the lesson for you is, is in the gym still, is in getting your health in order still, is in resolving your relationship with your parents still.
00:59:59.840 And, and to be frank, those are the higher priorities in the grand scheme of things.
01:00:04.460 Those, that, that, that, those areas of our lives are the areas of the greatest impact.
01:00:09.920 Or they should be.
01:00:11.280 Yeah.
01:00:12.420 Yeah.
01:00:13.460 Agreed.
01:00:15.040 You're going to say something, Sean.
01:00:16.860 No, no, that was it.
01:00:18.060 You nailed it.
01:00:20.300 All right.
01:00:20.980 Peter Morrison, are you good on time?
01:00:22.600 A couple more questions.
01:00:23.340 Yeah, this will be the last one.
01:00:24.380 And then I got to jump.
01:00:25.720 Okay.
01:00:26.380 Well, let me pick a good last one then.
01:00:29.580 It's got to be a jujitsu one in there somewhere.
01:00:32.160 There is a one, but that's easy.
01:00:33.880 That's a low hanging.
01:00:34.840 Like we could answer that in one minute.
01:00:39.120 Okay.
01:00:39.660 That's tough.
01:00:41.760 I think legacy aligns.
01:00:44.020 We, we can pass this other question on moving forward.
01:00:47.440 So Peter Morrison, let's talk about legacy.
01:00:51.320 When attempting something very difficult with regard to legacy, what are your top three priorities to address?
01:00:58.600 Um, well, how first one is, is what I'm doing now affecting that legacy?
01:01:11.420 And then the next question is how, is it positive or negative?
01:01:17.020 And then, I mean, the first question before those two is what do I want in the first place?
01:01:25.660 So, I mean, if I were going to pick a top three, it's knowing what you want, what you want that to look like, the actions necessary to get there.
01:01:33.940 And then every day, am I moving the needle closer to that destination or further from it?
01:01:42.660 And that comes back to the growth mindset we were talking about and accountability in those things.
01:01:49.320 And too many people are just drifting in their life and hoping that the current is going to take them to their destination.
01:01:57.660 And it just doesn't work that way.
01:02:00.040 So we have to be more intuitive and we have to be more, um, uh, I'm losing the word intentional.
01:02:16.140 Oh my gosh, just be intentional and where you want to go and the rest will line up with that because if you know it, you understand it and you're speaking it on a daily basis.
01:02:35.320 That's why the battle planner is so important that one of my favorite books, thinking grow rich is writing down what you want, reading it out loud a couple of times a day, um, speaking what you're going, what sacrifices you're going to make, what you're going to give in return.
01:02:51.580 And, um, you know, and then the rest will then, then you just need time.
01:02:59.800 Yeah.
01:03:00.280 And over time, as long as you're getting better, that 1% better every day, it doesn't even have to be 1%.
01:03:08.360 It could be 0.01%, which as long as it's a little better every day, you look back at the end of your life and know you built something substantial, something you could be proud of, something that continued to grow, to expand, to make impact.
01:03:25.640 And that you didn't just drift.
01:03:27.920 Yeah.
01:03:28.540 I love it, man.
01:03:29.400 I, a failure that I have.
01:03:32.740 And so I'm projecting on everybody listening is I believe in the eighth day of the week called someday.
01:03:40.300 And I think in the iron council, we, we, we do this sometimes.
01:03:44.560 And, and by the way, to learn about the iron council, go to order of man.com slash iron council, but we get new guys in the iron council and they will write these visions and in the, in the spirit of legacy.
01:03:57.000 And it's all future tense.
01:04:00.340 And it's all, it's all, it's all, it's all after I get this, you know, and we even do this in goal setting, right?
01:04:08.100 We'll, we'll, we'll go, well, I'm going to complete a marathon.
01:04:10.620 Why?
01:04:11.180 Oh, because when I do, then that means this, or when I get a six pack of abs, oh, why do I care about that?
01:04:17.440 Oh, because if I had a six pack, then that means this.
01:04:20.660 And we're all delaying it to someday.
01:04:26.100 And so my only challenge and recommendation would be don't wait.
01:04:32.420 I think so much of the impact and the opportunities that we have in life is in the state of being.
01:04:41.820 How are you showing up today?
01:04:44.940 Are you an amazing dad today?
01:04:47.060 Are you loving your kids today?
01:04:50.660 Are you resolving those relationships that need to be resolved or, or completed or fixed today?
01:04:59.520 Not someday, not after this, not I'm going to be happy when I know today, like be it today.
01:05:07.180 Don't, don't delay.
01:05:09.080 Otherwise a lot.
01:05:11.100 And at least for me, I'll end up chasing.
01:05:13.300 And then when I get there, it's not enough.
01:05:15.300 And then when I, and it's the next thing, it's not enough.
01:05:17.680 It's, it's like when I first like started working a real job.
01:05:21.340 I remember I went to college.
01:05:22.600 I'm a son of a dairy farmer.
01:05:24.160 I remember going to college thinking if I can make 40 K a year, if I could make 40 K a year,
01:05:30.780 I'd be successful.
01:05:32.960 And I remember when I made 40 and I thought, no, that's not enough.
01:05:35.900 And then it was 60 and that's not enough.
01:05:37.580 And 80 and that's not enough.
01:05:38.640 And then I realized like it had nothing to do with the money.
01:05:41.780 Nope.
01:05:43.120 And so be careful your definition of legacy and don't delay it too long.
01:05:48.980 It would be my recommendation.
01:05:51.980 Love it.
01:05:52.980 Cool, brother.
01:05:54.340 All right.
01:05:54.960 A couple of call to actions.
01:05:56.220 I mean, we talked about the iron council, you know, where to join us, join us online,
01:05:59.800 connect with Sean and I on the gram and Mr.
01:06:03.460 Mickler on X and Instagram at Ryan Mickler.
01:06:06.320 And the, really the last thing Ryan's out.
01:06:09.580 I didn't even explain that.
01:06:11.400 So he's out, he's doing a hunt in Africa, um, with M 42 adventures, uh, to connect with
01:06:18.520 the things that they do there.
01:06:19.960 That's M the numbers for two adventures.com.
01:06:23.760 And then starting on October 1st, a big call to action is a program that Ryan's putting together
01:06:29.780 called divorce, not death.com.
01:06:33.280 So you divorce, not death.com.
01:06:35.380 And it's really navigating post-divorce.
01:06:38.700 And, and I think it's in line with the spirit of kind of what we're talking about is just
01:06:42.900 get, get, get prepared, right?
01:06:46.700 If you're struggling with something, address it.
01:06:49.180 Um, if, if things are unresolved, address them.
01:06:53.360 If, if you're not sovereign financially, get that way, right?
01:06:56.740 Like take some action, uh, and get buttoned up.
01:07:00.080 Um, Sean, any closing marks?
01:07:02.700 No, I love it.
01:07:03.960 I, you just gave so many resources for people to move the needle.
01:07:08.100 Like I was talking about.
01:07:09.240 And the only thing that's going to stop you is not taking advantage of any of them.
01:07:13.540 Yeah.
01:07:13.980 So take advantage it, uh, advantage of that.
01:07:17.200 And until Friday field notes, take action and become the men that you were meant to be.
01:07:27.560 Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast.
01:07:30.440 You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be.
01:07:34.420 We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.
01:07:37.740 You're ready to join the order of man.