Money Mindsets That Wipeout Wealth | FRIDAY FIELD NOTES
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Summary
As we roll into 2026, there are some mindsets that are keeping you from building prosperity and abundance in your life. They re keeping you enslaved to the shackles of debt, keeping you dissatisfied and frustrated, and when you re dealing with money issues, and most of it stems from the thoughts that we have around this little green piece of paper that we call money, it permeates negatively every aspect of your life and messes with your relationships.
Transcript
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I know a lot of very dysfunctional people, myself included in some of those, who learn
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how to make money because wealth requires discipline. You can hear people talk about
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what's worked well and what hasn't worked well. And then you guys will say, well, my situation's
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different. No, it isn't. You're not special. Okay. You are not special. Okay. You're not
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extraordinary. You're not unique. You're not special. You're the same as everybody else.
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And you know what? Money decisions don't care about your self-perceived exceptionalism.
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Ben, as a former financial advisor and somebody who at the risk of sounding a little egotistical
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and arrogant that has always been good with his money, I can't help but think as we roll into
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2026 that there are some mindsets that are wiping out your wealth. They're keeping you from building
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prosperity and abundance in your life. They're keeping you enslaved to the shackles of debt.
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They're keeping you dissatisfied and frustrated. And when you're dealing with money issues,
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and most of it stems from the thoughts that we have around this little green piece of paper
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that we call money and increasingly the X's and O's in the digital space, it permeates negatively
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every aspect of every aspect of your life. It really messes with your relationships. It messes with your
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psyche. It messes with your self-confidence. It keeps you frustrated and contentious and resentful,
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and it drives wedges between you and the people that you love. I wish it weren't the case,
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but it is. And what I wanted to share with you is 10 money mindsets that are wrecking,
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just demolishing your ability to build wealth in your life. So let's just jump right into it.
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Number one is the I'll deal with it later mentality. So many men procrastinate. And I,
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and I understand you're frustrated. You're confused. Uh, you, you think people are out to get you. Um,
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you don't feel like you're getting paid what you deserve. You think people are taking advantage of
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you. And some of that is true. But if you think to yourself that I'm going to deal with this down the
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road because I don't have the capacity or margin or space to deal with it now, you won't, you just won't.
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Most people I think in life believe that they're going to deal with things later when things are
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good, when things are comfortable, when the situation is different and you won't. And I know
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that because I haven't, when I really care about improving in my life, it's because I care about it
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now in the moment, not, Hey, I'll deal with that next week or I'll deal with it next year,
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or I'll deal with it when I get that big bonus, or I deal with it when I get a better job.
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No, you deal with it right now. And if you don't deal with it right now, it's because you don't care
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about it. And then just be honest about that. And I'm not just talking about money. I'm talking about
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relationships. I'm talking about your physical wellbeing. I'm talking about overcoming
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addiction and vices and temptation. If you say to me or anybody else, or even yourself that I'll deal
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with it later, you just don't care about it enough period. That's it. And that's okay. If you can live
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with the consequences of your decisions, but at least be honest with it. And the problem with
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procrastinating to quote unquote someday is that just like interest, it's going to compound.
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And if you don't deal with it right now, it's going to be significantly worse when you decide
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that, Hey, I'm ready to deal with it today. Number two, I make good money. So I'm fine. I'm great.
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Most men confuse income with wealth. And that's a problem because there's all sorts of reasons
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beyond your control that will shut off your income, disability, loss of a job, breakdown in
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the economy. And we talk about sovereignty all the time. If you're just thinking, Hey, I'll always be
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good. You are sadly mistaken. If you're not building in contingency plans, if you're not building your
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wealth outside of what your income is, you're really going to find yourself in a very, very bad
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situation when things go South and they will, you will lose your job. You will take a dip in the
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economy. If you're a business owner, your business will become obsolete because of AI. Uh, you will
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decide that you want to pour more into your family because your relationship is falling apart. There's,
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there's so many different things that could come up that would limit your ability to make money.
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And if you're making six high six, even seven figures right now, and you think I'm good,
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I can fund my lifestyle. Well, you can now, but can you tomorrow? Okay. Income masks, your dysfunction.
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I know a lot of very dysfunctional people, myself included in some regards who learn how to make
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money. I learned how to make money very early in my life. Cause I learned from a dysfunctional,
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human being how to do it and bless his heart, but it didn't teach me the things that I really need
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to do because wealth requires discipline. It requires a deeper understanding of how to
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not only make money, but keep and invest and build money. Those are two different functions.
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You can make money, but can you build wealth? I don't know to be determined, but there are two
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different functions and we need to know that number three, again, money mindsets that are wrecking your
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wealth, that debt is normal. It's, it's not, it's not normal. It's not normal to pay 10, 12, 14,
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18, 18, 20%. It's called usury. It's, it's not normal that somebody else take advantage of you in
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that way. It's not normal for you to be keeping up with the Joneses. It's not normal for you to look
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on this stupid little device that we have called a cell phone and jump on social media and see the
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newest truck people have, or the newest house, or the newest gidget and gizmo, or the greatest and
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latest vacation they went on. That's not normal for thousands and thousands of years. We did not
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have the ability to compare ourselves to the degree that we can now. And we did not have the access to
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debt vehicles that we do now. And if you think to yourself, well, you know, I can afford the payment
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that's different than I can afford it. Yeah. You can afford an $800 truck payment. Sure.
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But can you afford that? No, of course you can. That's retarded. I don't know how else to say it.
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So many of you guys are absolutely ridiculous because you're worried about how the truck will
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make you feel. And you know, this, it doesn't make you feel better guys for a week. Sure. A couple of
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weeks, maybe, but after that, no, that dream house that you and your wife, probably your wife wanted
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you to get and all the bells and whistles and all the features and the acreage and the fancy technology
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with the dimming lights and smart TV and all that kind of stuff. Yeah, that's all fine and wonderful
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for her. But the reality is that you're going to be pacing a dirt fucking track in your backyard
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because you don't know how to make the mortgage payment. This is the stuff that men deal with
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and we justify it as normal. This is what it means to be a man. I buy this house for my wife.
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No, most of the time it's unreasonable. This is what it means to be a man. I have the latest and
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greatest truck or car or whatever. No man should own a car. Uh, I mean, maybe a car for some mileage,
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but you should also own a truck because you never know when you might get stuck or need four wheel
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drive or need to run over a protester. So you should always have four wheel drive as well.
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And I'm not talking about Subarus. That's all wheel drive. That's different. But guys, debt is not normal.
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What's normal is figuring out ways to get paid more for what you do. What's normal is investing in
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your education so you can get paid more and not living above your means. What's normal is not being
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in debt. That's what's normal within this community. Debt is not normal. Now I'm not above saying that
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there aren't some instances where you might acquire maybe some educational debt or maybe some business
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debt because you believe in yourself and I can get behind that, but that's not what we're talking
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about. We're talking about you keeping up with the Joneses. So you go out and buy the 90 or a hundred
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thousand dollar. Well, I don't even know what they are anymore. A hundred thousand dollar Denali because
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it looks better than what old Billy Bob next door to you has. Don't do that. Be around people
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who are financially prudent and you will be as well. All right. Number four is the belief that
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someone else will figure this out for you. Many times we as men abdicate our responsibility and we
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outsource that, right? So we outsource it to a financial advisor. We outsource our children's
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education to the public school system. We outsource our health situation to pharmaceutical companies
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through GLPs and through testosterone and these sorts of things. And we think, oh, you know,
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somebody else will take care of that for us. No, nobody will take care of that for you.
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I've whittled it down to three things. Nobody can take care of your health, your wealth,
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and your mindset. Nobody else can do that for you. Now you might hire other people to come in like a
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coach to help you with your health or a financial advisor to help you with your financial abundance
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or a life coach to help you with your mindset or even parenting. You know, some people will ship their
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kids to school and think, well, I'm going to wash my hands because, you know, the school district will
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take care of them. No, they won't. What in your right mind thinks that that's the case.
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Nobody's going to figure out your future for you. No financial advisor, no mortgage company,
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no investment company. They don't care about you. What they care about is their bottom line.
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And sometimes you and your financial advisor, and I'm saying this as a former financial advisor,
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sometimes those interests are aligned. When I was working with clients, I wanted to make
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sure that my interest to build a growing financial advisory practice and my client's best interest
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were aligned, but I didn't want to do things at the expense of them. And unfortunately, too many
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organizations will. So they can make a paycheck. They can make a commission. They can make a sale.
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You might bring coaches and advisors in, but you can't outsource your financial prosperity.
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Number five, I deserve this. I've worked hard. I deserve this. I've built this business. I deserve this.
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You don't deserve anything. Nothing. When I was in my financial advisory practice, I worked with a lot of
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young dentists, early practice dentists, dentists just coming out of dental school.
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And I can tell you the single greatest factor for determining whether or not that dentist was going
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to be successful was whether or not they continued to live at the standard they were living, slightly
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elevated, in dental school as they were in their first few years of practice. Because so many of them
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would think, well, I graduated dental school or I became an orthodontist. And so, you know, I deserve this
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house now. I deserve this car. I deserve these luxury items. And sometimes it was the woman chirping
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in their ear saying, hey, I sacrificed eight, nine, 10 years of my life for you to be a dentist. Now it's
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time for me to get mine. And they let their wife dictate the situation. And they bought the 8,000 square
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foot house. And they bought the 5,000 dentistry practice. And they bought the latest and greatest
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Tesla or Mercedes or Beamer or whatever your car of choice was. Because somebody was chirping in their
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ear or they were chirping in their own ear saying, when I graduate dental school, then I will have made
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it. You didn't make shit. Coming out of dental school, congratulations, you were a really good
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student. Congratulations, you memorized a bunch of stuff. Congratulations, you passed the test. It's all good.
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I'm not discounting it. But I'm saying it's not everything. You don't deserve anything. Nothing. You earn
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everything. And if you start getting into this mentality of I deserve a car, I deserve a house,
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I deserve the vacation, I deserve this, I deserve that. Bad thinking, earn it. Hey, how do hey, if
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you're married? Hey, babe, how do we we want to go on a vacation this year? Maybe we want to go in the
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fall to we want to travel abroad in Europe. Okay, babe, that's going to cost us $10,000 for a couple of
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weeks in on a European trip. How do we earn that? What can we do right now to earn a $10,000? Is it
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paying off debt? Is it putting $800 a month aside into our vacation fund? Is it postponing for a year
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because we don't have the means right now? You don't deserve anything. You earn everything. So get over
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that mindset of thinking you deserve things. All right, number six, more money will fix the problems. No, it
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won't. Okay, this is so devious. More money will not fix your problems, guys. You know what it'll do? Magnify your
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shit. So if you're a horrible, horrible spender, do you think moving from $100,000 a year to $250,000 a year
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will change your spending habits? No, it'll make it worse. Do you think that if you're living, let's
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say, net negative 20% of your income on a monthly or annual basis that having two, three, four, five,
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10 times the wealth will mean that you're going to live less than what you are now? No. It just means
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you're going to continue to live at a net negative 20% of whatever you're currently making.
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This is a problem so many people have. I'll just make more money. Just make more money. And you hear
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this guys will say, well, you know, you can't, you can't build wealth. And this is one thing I actually
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agree with on, on what Dave Ramsey's philosophy is. Dave Ramsey talks about the financial principles.
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Now in application, he's wrong on a lot of things, but the principles of investing and saving and
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paying down debt are sound. And I would agree with him on that. And some people will say they'll
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criticize him and they'll say, well, you can't, um, what did I say? You can't eat beans and rice and
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build, build abundance and wealth in your life. That's not even what he's saying. Okay. Anybody who says
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that like, well, you can't eat beans and rice your way to abundance. It's a misrepresentation of what
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he's saying. Okay. What he's saying is that build the principle, the foundations, the, the, the actions,
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the behaviors, and then when more money comes in, now it's just going to be an exponential growth for
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you. But if you're living 20% below your means, you think having extra money will mean that you're not
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going to live 20% below your means. No, you still are going to live 20% below your means just at a
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greater scale. And you're going to get into debt faster. You're going to get in trouble with the
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IRS faster. And you're going to find yourself in a really, really bad way. Money does not fix the
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problem. It only amplifies it or the solution, depending on what kind of mindset you have.
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Number seven, investing is risky. Risk is a, is a, is a weird word. It means so many different things
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to so many different people. You know, some people will say owning a business is risky and other people
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will say being a, an employee is risky. Both can be risky. Okay. Investing in prudent financial
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decisions, being educated, knowing what you're going after. That's not risky. That's actually
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intelligent. And I'm not saying that you need to go put it all on red in Las Vegas this weekend and
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hope it works out for you. That would be risky, but that's not investing. That's what we would call
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gambling. Investing in ideas and concepts and business and yourself and your education in a way that
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is intelligent and rational and reasonable and logical is not risky. What's risky is
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doing nothing. If you have $50,000 a year or $10,000 or a thousand or a hundred, I don't care
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what the amount is. And you have that amount of money to do something with, and you just bury it.
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Let's go to the parable of the talents. You just bury that money. Is that less or more risky than
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investing that money prudently? It's more risky just purely from the cost of inflation alone. If inflation
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is 5% and could be even more, I know all politicians like to say it's lower, that's because they
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manipulate what is added into inflation and what is not, that's a whole other conversation. But let's
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just say for the sake of argument, inflation is 5% and you've got your money buried in a tin can out in
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the backyard with an X over it to get at it in case of emergency. Well, this year you lost 5% on that
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money. If you had a thousand dollars in there and what that thousand dollars would have bought in
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January of 2025 is now 10,000, excuse me, $1,050. You, you just lost money. You didn't just break even.
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You lost money. You need to invest in prudent, wise decisions. Again, be prudent and wise. And we're
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going to break that down throughout the year, but investing is not risky. Not doing anything is more
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risky. Number eight, I don't need to understand money. Somebody else will do it for me or, you know,
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it's common sense is one thing I hear a lot, or I have an advisor or a CPA or an attorney to help me
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out with that. Okay. Congratulations. You just outsourced your sovereignty. And hopefully those
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interests of other people are always in alignment with yours, but they might not always be. So you
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might say, I don't need to understand money. I just need to make more of it. We already talked about
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that. I don't need to understand money. I'll just have somebody else do it. Okay. We just,
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we just talked about that. You do need to understand money the same way you need to understand what it
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takes to build muscle, what it takes to develop a relationship. I know it gets complex and it gets
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confusing at times. It doesn't need to be. Most social media people would make things more confusing
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than they need to be because if it's confusing, then you need to hire them. It's not confusing.
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You know how to build muscle, eat a lot of protein, lift a lot of weight, push yourself,
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do that four to five times a week. You don't need to do a bunch of cardio. You need to get your protein
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and your macros right. And you'll build muscle. Simple. Money's the same. Don't spend more than you
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make. Set aside 15 to 20% of your income. Be prudent in your investment decisions. Don't put
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all your eggs in one basket. Buy low, sell high. We all know the principles.
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You need to understand money. You need to dig into it. And if you care about it and care about your
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life and care about your position as a man, as a father, a husband, business owner, community leader,
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then you will understand money and you'll invest time and energy into it. Number nine is my situation's
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different. My situation is different. You know, you can hear people talk about what's worked well
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and what hasn't worked well. And then you guys will say, well, my situation is different. No,
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it isn't. You're not special. Okay. You are not special. We have this idea that exceptionalism keeps
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people that somehow because you're exceptional, that you will be better off than anybody else.
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You're not exceptional. Okay. You're not extraordinary. You're not unique. You're not special.
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You're the same as everybody else. And you know what? Money decisions don't care about your
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self-perceived exceptionalism. They don't. It's non-discriminatory.
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It will discriminate in every possible way against every possible person. Black, white, Asian,
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brown, brown, like you name it. Sexual orientation. I don't care. Straight, gay, transgender, bi. I don't
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care. Money is ruthless and it doesn't care about the bullshit that you're telling yourself about how
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great you are or how virtuous you are or how wonderful you are or why you care so much about
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other people and how self-righteous you are. It doesn't care. It will destroy you as easily as it
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will destroy anybody else. You are not different. You are not special. There's nothing good coming
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to you that isn't available to anybody else. And just be normal. Be a normie. It's okay to be a
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normal person. In fact, I think the normal ones, the unassuming ones, based on some statistics I've seen,
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are probably more likely to be successful than you who believe yourself to be special. You're not special.
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There isn't anything that you've gone through that millions of other people have gone through.
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There isn't some knowledge that you have that other people don't have access to. People do this all the time
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when it comes to picking stocks. They'll be like, well, you know, my cousin's brother's uncle's nephew's niece
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told me about this one thing that maybe I should invest in. Bro, whoever that is, whoever you're talking
00:23:55.720
about, they know just as much or probably less than every other person on the planet.
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And whatever they're factoring into the equation of a stock price is already factored into the price
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of the stock. You're not special. Okay. Unless you're, you know, somebody in Congress, I'm not going to name
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names, but somebody in Congress who can deal on insider trading that isn't accessible to the public,
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then you're not, you're not special. Just do good and decent things, make good prudent decisions.
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And that's how you get ahead. And the last thing here, and I'm, and I'm adamant about this guys
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is too many men are operating under the assumption, the guys that money is the problem.
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Um, that, you know, money is the root of all evil. And I know that's been dispelled and debunked a bunch
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of times. It's the love of money. Um, but even, even still so many of you who know the scriptural
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reference that it's not the, the, that money is the root of evil, that the love of money is,
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is evil, still act as if money is your idol. And that's the problem. If you think money is the
00:25:14.740
problem, then what you also think is that money is the solution, right? If I think, well, money's the
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problem. I just don't have enough of it. Then that means that if I have more of it, my problems will be
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solved. Well, money, money is the problem because of the way people act. Well, then you're waiting
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for other people to act differently and they won't. Money is not the problem guys. It only reveals to
00:25:42.620
you what your priorities are, what your habits are, what your character is, how you're spending your
00:25:49.300
money, how you're advocating, how you're being a steward. That's one of my favorite words, a steward
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over your resources. And if you're just a complete tool over the way that you use your money,
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it's not the money that's the problem. It's just a symptom of the problem. If you don't know how
00:26:10.740
to build wealth, it's not because capitalism bad. That's stupid. Like if you believe socialism is
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going to solve your problems, you're ridiculous. You're, you're, you're an idiot actually. And you're
00:26:25.060
very ignorant. Money is not the problem. Your behaviors are, your priorities are the problem.
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Your character, the way that you interact and engage with the world, the things you spend money,
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that's the problem, not the money. It's a green piece of paper. I'm holding up a paper piece of
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paper right now. It's a great, it's a piece of paper. Or if you're holding up your phone,
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it's an X or a zero, it, it means nothing, literally nothing. And we can dive into that.
00:27:00.060
Why is the green piece of, I'm not holding up a dollar. I'm just holding up a piece of paper.
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Well, why did we decide that this piece of paper is worth something? I don't know. We just decided
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one day that this piece of paper shaped in this way with this color, with these marks on it means
00:27:13.540
this much money. And we all decided that's sure. That sounds good. We'll move it off the gold standard.
00:27:18.620
It's, it's, it's not this. It's not some arbitrary piece of paper. It's not some arbitrary X or O
00:27:27.520
on your digital device. What it is, is your acumen, your skillset, your, your knowledge, your wisdom,
00:27:39.720
your capability. And then we decide that that's worth something. So like guys, the best way to get over
00:27:47.820
your money problems is not to start thinking about how much more, more money you need, but to start
00:27:53.360
thinking about how much more value you need to provide in the world. If you're not making enough,
00:27:59.500
that means that you're not providing enough value to the people that you want to provide value to.
00:28:04.460
What can you do differently in order to extract or exchange is probably a better way. Exchange the
00:28:09.540
value of goods and services. I hope this lands. And we're going to get a little bit more specific over the
00:28:17.620
coming months into 2026. But let me recap these money mindsets that are just, just walloping your ability
00:28:25.980
to build wealth. Number one, I'll deal with it later. Number two, I make good money. So I'm fine. Number three,
00:28:34.360
debt is normal. Number four, somebody else will figure this out for me. Number five is I deserve
00:28:43.300
this. Number six is more money will fix my problems. Number seven is investing is risky. Eight, I don't
00:28:51.780
need to understand money. Number nine, I'm special. My situation is different. And number 10, money is the
00:28:59.540
problem. If money is the problem, then it's also the solution. So let's figure out better ways to build
00:29:06.240
wealth in our lives. And if you're interested in how to do this, join us inside the Iron Council,
00:29:10.840
orderofman.com slash Iron Council. We have many financial advisors talking about money, wealth
00:29:16.400
building, debt consolidation, debt payoff, budgeting. I had a good conversation with one of our battle teams
00:29:22.920
at 5 a.m. this morning. I had to get up early to take care of that. And we talked all about how to
00:29:27.700
build more wealth and the right mindsets in order to build prosperity and wealth in your life. We also
00:29:33.420
have entrepreneurial experts, guys who've been very successful, and we're going to introduce those
00:29:38.440
people to you. So if you have any questions, go to orderofman.com slash Iron Council. But in the
00:29:44.540
meantime, guys, I think it's very, very important that we learn how to build wealth in our lives, that we
00:29:51.480
don't demonize wealth, that we figure out ways to build prosperity and abundance, and we get over the
00:29:59.280
mindsets that wipe out wealth in your life. I hope that helps. I hope that serves you. If you have additional
00:30:05.260
questions, hit me up on the gram or wherever you're doing your social media stuff, at Ryan Mickler, and we
00:30:11.100
will catch you next week for our interview. Until then, guys, go out there, take action, build wealth, and become a man you
00:30:17.940
are meant to be. Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast. You're ready to take charge of
00:30:23.720
your life and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.