Order of Man - OoM 044： Taking Ownership of Your Life Through Entrepreneurship with Tom Reber

00:00:00.000 So many men out there are unhappy with the direction or course of their life,

00:00:03.120 but I can tell you personally that there has been no greater move I could have made in my own life

00:00:06.820 than to start my own businesses. The lessons I've learned, the progress I've made, and the life I've

00:00:11.940 created cannot be duplicated living any other way. Today, my guest Tom Rebber shares with us the five

00:00:17.000 most important reasons you should consider starting a business, the bare minimums you'll

00:00:21.200 need to get started, and how you can take ownership of your life through entrepreneurship.

00:00:25.040 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly charge

00:00:29.840 your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time, every time. You are not

00:00:35.740 easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong. This is your life. This is who you are.

00:00:42.900 This is who you will become at the end of the day, and after all is said and done,

00:00:47.660 you can call yourself a man. Men, welcome to the Order of Man podcast. I am Ryan Michler,

00:00:53.160 the host and founder of Order of Man. Now, we're talking all things manly, as you know, on this

00:00:57.060 podcast, and today, specifically, we're talking about controlling your own life and your own

00:01:01.880 destiny through this amazing tool that we call entrepreneurship. And before I get too much into

00:01:06.800 this, I do want to, again, to send you a formal invitation to join our elite mastermind, which

00:01:11.680 is called Iron Council. This month, me and the guys will be talking a lot about planning,

00:01:15.860 vision, creating the frameworks for success, the blueprints for making 2016 all that you want

00:01:22.100 to be. So, if you're telling yourself things like, I feel stuck, or I know there's more to life,

00:01:26.700 or I'm ready to take my life to the next level, this is the group for you. This is the group that

00:01:30.440 you have to get involved with. We're having real discussions each week, holding each other

00:01:33.860 accountable to our goals and priorities. We're talking in our closed Facebook group. We're completing

00:01:38.140 daily assignments and other assignments that we receive. You'll have access to resources to help you

00:01:43.040 take your life up a notch in relationships, in business, in family, and in your community,

00:01:48.740 and all the things that you want to do. So, head to orderofman.com slash iron council. Right now,

00:01:54.000 watch the video, join these other solid men in their pursuit to become the men they were meant to

00:01:59.020 be. Also, our giveaway with my friends over at Seneca Creek. Congrats to the winner of last week's

00:02:03.660 giveaway, which was the fly fishing wallet. This week, we'll be giving away a field shirt by Edgevale.

00:02:09.380 So, you'll want to check that out. You can head to orderofman.com slash Seneca Creek giveaway

00:02:15.120 four. Seneca Creek giveaway four to enter into the drawing. Now, let's get into the show today.

00:02:20.940 Remember that you can find all the links, the resources, the show notes, all of discussions

00:02:24.460 over at orderofman.com slash zero four four. And of course, join in the conversation that we're

00:02:28.900 having with now over 1700 men on our Facebook group at facebook.com slash groups slash order of

00:02:36.300 men. Men, I'm excited to introduce you to my guest and my friend, Tom Weber. He is an entrepreneur

00:02:41.220 and he's also the founder of Strongpreneur Nation. Strongpreneur Nation is for entrepreneurs who are

00:02:46.520 committed to creating strong lives and strong businesses. He teaches men how to get things done,

00:02:51.820 deal with the head trash that we tell ourselves, get back our time and build companies our customers

00:02:56.920 will love. And as you'll hear in the interview today, Tom takes a no nonsense approach to business,

00:03:02.500 entrepreneurship and life. Tom, thanks for joining us. Glad you're here, man.

00:03:06.720 Thanks for having me, Ryan. It's great to be here, man. How are you doing?

00:03:09.040 I'm really good. Really good. I'm recovering from a cold. You know that. But on the men and

00:03:14.940 feeling a lot better. So I appreciate you asking. Oh, good. I'm glad to hear it.

00:03:18.440 So I'm really excited to have this conversation because this is something that obviously with

00:03:22.780 order of man and what I see other men doing is something that I'm passionate about. And that is

00:03:27.800 the idea and concept of starting a business. And the first question I want to ask you is why do you

00:03:32.940 think it's important, assuming that you think this is important, that men start businesses and

00:03:38.460 become entrepreneurs? Oh, wow. Man, you start out with a great question. That's good.

00:03:42.740 I don't know. We don't mess around. That's like, you know, hello. Good morning. Here we are.

00:03:47.700 No. Well, first of all, you know, a few things come to mind right away. Like I had this just

00:03:53.060 flash of stuff that popped in my head when you asked me that question. And, and, and the first thing

00:03:59.100 that came, came to mind is there's a show, I think it's on the history channel called Vikings.

00:04:03.640 Okay. Yeah. Yeah. And, um, I don't know, a year and a half ago or whatever, I was watching it. And

00:04:07.980 there was this one guy who's kind of like the main guy and he wants to go west and explore. And the

00:04:15.500 king wants to go east and raid every year. And this guy's got like 30 dudes with him. And he says,

00:04:22.520 let's get in a boat and let's go, let's go west. Cause we don't know what's out there. And they were

00:04:27.900 catching slack for it. And everyone's like, Hey, I'm in, I'm in, I'm in. And this guy, one of this

00:04:32.800 guy's really good friends is standing there and he hasn't said he's that he's in yet. The dude

00:04:37.820 walks up to me and he says, brother, are you, are you with me or not? Right. And his answer was so

00:04:42.980 cool. And he says, of course, because I need stories to tell my kids. And that was the first

00:04:49.780 thing I thought of when you asked, why should men start businesses? Because there's a lot of cool

00:04:53.840 crap that happens when you start a business, a lot of crazy stuff and it's an adventure. And,

00:05:00.260 and I just like the idea, number one of creating a story that I can't get working for a corporation.

00:05:08.260 Uh, that that's the first thing that popped into my mind. The second thing is I want to control my

00:05:11.940 future. And as men, uh, there's a lot of things in the world that I think are coming after us, um,

00:05:18.420 in a lot of ways and making us feel like we don't have power over certain situations. And I

00:05:23.820 think when you own your own business, you are 100% taking your future into your own hands.

00:05:29.740 And I, and I love that. And I, and I also love the idea of making more money. A lot of people want

00:05:34.620 to start side businesses and make extra income. But I believe if you start a business and you pay

00:05:40.400 attention to some very, you know, core basic things and do them really well, money's not going to be a

00:05:46.100 problem for you and you'll be able to give yourself a raise whenever you want. And that's cool.

00:05:49.380 But I think the most important thing, uh, why I think men should start businesses is

00:05:55.260 in order to succeed in business, you have to make a lot of changes and do a lot of growth

00:06:00.320 personally. So I think, um, just looking at who you need to become in order to be a successful

00:06:05.460 business guy, um, is really the big, the big reason because I've had to change so many things

00:06:11.580 about myself for the better, uh, in order to be successful at the things that I've been able

00:06:16.580 to do. Are these things that you identified beforehand or have they just come at you when

00:06:21.520 there's a new problem to be solved or a hurdle to overcome? You know, there, there are things that

00:06:26.560 I've just learned through the years. When I first started my very first business that I started was

00:06:30.620 a painting business. Um, and, and I did it, I grew up, uh, you know, out of the Marine Corps and

00:06:36.600 campus ministry and did a lot of stuff, sales and this and that long story short, I got fired from a

00:06:41.840 church that I worked. Wow. Yeah. You top that one, man. Yeah, that's tough for sure. I got fired

00:06:48.040 from Burger King once, but it doesn't, uh, it doesn't, uh, top that. That's for sure. I got

00:06:52.300 fired from a nightclub in Palm Springs called Palm pays. Uh, anyone that's in Palm Palm Springs might

00:06:58.000 know that place. When I was in the Marine Corps, they used to hire Marines to work the door and, uh,

00:07:02.600 and I let a girl in a back door. We weren't supposed to, she was an employee and she knocked on this 1.00

00:07:06.480 door, side door, whatever it was. And I let her in and we weren't supposed to let anyone in.

00:07:10.260 And I was canned in five minutes. I was gone. So anyway, um, no, this is stuff, you know,

00:07:16.160 I started my first business cause I needed to feed my wife and kid. I had one kid at the time and,

00:07:20.540 and I knew the trade. I grew up in the trade with my, my uncle and grandfather and, and, and, and I

00:07:26.240 really got into it and not having a clue what I was doing like a lot of us do. And so these are just

00:07:33.800 things I've learned through the years and I've learned helping, you know, several dozen other

00:07:39.480 business owners and entrepreneurs, you know, through their journey as well. But I really

00:07:43.240 think the biggest thing is I've, I've had to become a better person. And so that's, that's one

00:07:47.440 reason that I think it's a good idea for a guy to start a business. Yeah. So you, I'm going to go

00:07:51.340 back to something you said earlier. You said there's three or four core concepts that if guys learn

00:07:55.420 very quickly, that they'll be able to make money quickly. And I think obviously that's one of the

00:07:59.840 reasons why you would consider starting a business going out on your own. What are some of those

00:08:04.340 core concepts? I think that'd be very valuable for everybody to know.

00:08:08.180 So the, uh, the first thing for me that, that I, I personally believe is if you just operate

00:08:14.040 your business from a position of respect and everything you do, no matter who you're dealing

00:08:19.400 with, your employees, your partners, uh, your vendors, your, your clients, obviously, um, so many

00:08:26.200 businesses are blowing it because they just, they miss this whole respect thing. And, you know,

00:08:32.960 you see it wherever you go, you know, it's, um, I, I took a picture and I'm, I'm debating on whether

00:08:38.880 I'm going to post it. I was at Panera yesterday. Uh, and I stopped in to use the wifi. It was rush

00:08:45.180 hour. Like tons of people are in this Panera and there's hardly any seats available. And I find a

00:08:50.320 seat and next to me at this table of five is one lone Panera employee laying down on the table,

00:08:56.900 taking a nap. Oh, wow. Interesting. Yeah. You got to post that for sure. Yeah. I got to post that.

00:09:02.500 So, um, you know, respect is all around us. So to me, this is low hanging fruit. I think

00:09:07.260 if you're just a respectful human being to everyone you deal with in your business, that

00:09:11.980 right there gets you brownie points and helps. It's almost sad that we need to even bring

00:09:16.300 that up, but it is reality that, that I think businesses, I see it. We see it all the time,

00:09:19.880 especially this time of year, you know, we're at Christmas time and, and, uh, there's huge

00:09:23.800 opportunities for businesses, but, uh, employees don't want to be helpful. They're almost put

00:09:28.260 out that you show up and you want to purchase something from them, whether it's dining

00:09:31.960 out or, or buying clothes or whatever it may be. And it's incredible. Every time I see

00:09:36.780 it. Oh man, a customer came in, I got to put my phone down and help them now. You know,

00:09:40.920 it's that whole roll of the eyes. And, you know, we interviewed a guy, uh, my, one of my painting

00:09:45.600 companies years ago, we interviewed this guy for a sales position. We were going to hire

00:09:49.560 him. My business partner and I were sitting there and we're like nodding, like, this is

00:09:52.880 the guy, this is the guy. Our office manager walks in, who's a female, uh, into, and she 0.99

00:09:59.060 hadn't met this guy yet. She came into the office. She had to interrupt us for something

00:10:03.240 and needed a signature or whatever the heck it was. And we were like, Hey, you know,

00:10:07.840 Laura, this is so-and-so, so-and-so this is Laura. And, and we were all sitting at a

00:10:12.160 desk when she walked in and or at a table and he didn't stand up when he met her.

00:10:17.040 Yeah. And immediately my partner and I looked at each other and we just knew this ain't the

00:10:23.140 guy. So everything was in his favor until he failed to show respect because that's something

00:10:27.780 I just, I'm not willing to teach you. If you come to me, I'm your employer. My job's

00:10:31.820 not to teach you to be a respectful person. If you don't have that already, then I don't

00:10:34.900 want you. And, um, to me, something you should have learned long ago before you ever stepped

00:10:38.980 foot into an interview. That's for sure. Yeah. So, you know, these, these four things

00:10:42.480 or so that come to mind, you know, I, I guess I call them my non-negotiables and one of them

00:10:46.960 is respect. You just have to be respectful. The, um, second thing is clarity. So many entrepreneurs

00:10:54.380 and business owners, you know, it's a blessing and a curse. We have a lot of ideas. Our brain

00:10:59.360 is moving a million miles a minute. Uh, and, uh, but then week to week, month to month,

00:11:05.960 we change course, we change direction, we change our goal or our strategy or our approach. And

00:11:10.640 we're just not clear on what we want. So I think if you can nail down truly being clear

00:11:16.260 in who you are as a business, who your ideal client is and what you do and what you don't

00:11:21.000 do, I think that right there, you know, is, is another one of those low hanging fruit things,

00:11:24.860 which, you know, third thing that comes to mind is, uh, consistent before, before we get to the

00:11:29.440 third one, I want to ask you, how is it that you found clarity in your business? Is there a process

00:11:33.600 that you went through? Does this take time? What does this look like for you and the, and the,

00:11:37.200 the clients that you coach? I wish I could say that I had this perfect plan when I went into my

00:11:41.780 coaching practice years ago. Uh, but truth be told, I, I was very unclear and it took throwing some

00:11:48.980 stuff against the wall and working with several different types of people. And I was, uh, I tried

00:11:55.180 to be competitive price-wise and all this other stuff. And I just hopped around and I never had

00:12:00.280 a clear direction. I never had a client that, um, I could really hang my hat on and in it, and it took

00:12:07.340 working my tail off for not making a lot of money for a while to realize, you know, I'm,

00:12:13.160 I'm adding something of massive value here to people. And, uh, and I'm pretty darn good at what

00:12:18.600 I do. And it honestly, it took a while to get to that point where I could really feel that deep down

00:12:23.580 like, man, no, I am good at what I do. And that's okay to feel confident in that. And I'm, I'm watching

00:12:28.800 all these companies that I helped make tens of make me watching these individuals making tens of

00:12:33.500 thousands more dollars a year. And I was looking at what I was charging and some things like that.

00:12:38.820 And, uh, and it didn't, it didn't, uh, compute, you know, it didn't make sense. So it took,

00:12:44.480 it took a while to realize that, uh, you know, my ideal client is generally,

00:12:48.660 generally a service business owner, you know, the contractor types, the people that run gyms,

00:12:54.240 uh, they offer a service where there's a lot of personal touches with the clients and they're

00:13:00.280 dealing in man hours and they're dealing in, you know, marketing tactics and strategies that are

00:13:05.380 very, very connected to the experience that they give for a business.

00:13:08.820 Um, so that's big. The other thing is, uh, my clients have to have thick skin cause I don't,

00:13:14.880 I don't want to waste a lot of time pussyfooting around things. Right. You know, and when you and

00:13:19.900 I shake on it and we're going to work together, I want you to know that I got your back and you got

00:13:24.520 mine and we're in this together. And, uh, sometimes I'm going to, I'm going to be your biggest fan,

00:13:29.880 but I'm also going to call you out, you know? And, um, and, and so you got to have thick skin and then

00:13:35.960 you, you have to be willing to find the money cause I'm not going to be cheap. And I'll get

00:13:40.020 to that one in a minute. Cause that's one of the other four things that I was going to talk about

00:13:43.660 was the money. How do you recommend that somebody who's starting a business or looking into doing

00:13:48.700 something on the side, whatever it may be shortcut that system? Because I know that there's a lot of

00:13:53.440 things that you can only learn through experience, but I also know that we should be learning from

00:13:57.160 guys like you and other people that have already gone through the process.

00:14:00.580 What can you recommend to someone to shortcut that clarity system, if you will?

00:14:05.960 Yeah. Oh man, your timing. And this is perfect. Cause one of my last blogs was actually,

00:14:10.120 how do you start a business, a small business without the typical stress?

00:14:13.740 And, um, and so I would say right out of the gate, do the bare minimum that you need to do to start a

00:14:20.340 business. A lot of times we, we get all caught up in the, the details of it. Now, obviously if you're

00:14:25.900 in an industry where you truly need some sort of certification or legal status and things like

00:14:31.420 that, do what you got to do. But in general, you need a problem to solve is what you need to start

00:14:36.440 a business. Um, you need anything required by law and you need a bank account. You don't need a logo.

00:14:42.080 You don't need cards. You don't even need a website yet. A lot of us think that we need all these things

00:14:46.800 that we don't, and we get bogged down and we never actually start the business. And in reality,

00:14:50.880 uh, you don't have a business unless you have a need to meet and a customer find a need, find a

00:14:56.320 customer, uh, who will pay you. And so you find a client, you help them, they give you some money.

00:15:02.360 Now you have a business. And at the end of the day, that client, that person with that need is

00:15:07.480 not going to care that you don't have a website or your business card is ugly. In most cases, uh,

00:15:12.420 as long as their problem is gone and they have the results they want, they're going to be happy

00:15:16.100 and they're going to tell somebody else. And then the next thing I guess would be, uh, once you

00:15:21.900 find that client, it's awesome that you've got somebody to pay you, but let's try to serve them

00:15:26.600 in ways that your competitors never will make the experience. So mind blowing that they're going to

00:15:32.180 measure all future business transactions by that. And what are some ways that you do that personally

00:15:37.560 in your practice? Yeah. So, you know, as a, as a coach, I'm, when I work with somebody one-on-one,

00:15:43.400 I'm pretty much available to them all the time. I don't punch a clock. You know, you got something

00:15:48.500 blowing up in your life or in your business and you need help with, you shoot me a text and we're

00:15:52.900 going to figure out a time real quick to get on the phone together. I worked with a coach years ago

00:15:57.340 where we had one call a month and it was this, this accountability call. But what I personally found

00:16:02.880 was that, you know, there was a lot of things happening between those calls each month

00:16:07.320 that I really needed mentoring on. I really needed some guidance on. And so when I started this,

00:16:12.160 I wanted to be, I really wanted to be part of your team, kind of a partner without being a partner,

00:16:18.160 if that makes sense. You know, legally saying so. Right. I'd say that's the biggest differentiator

00:16:23.740 is that I'm pretty much always available for my clients, which is why I don't take that many

00:16:29.240 one-on-one clients. Right. You know, so right. Cause you want to make yourself personally available

00:16:33.580 to them. What do you say to the guy who, who really wants to start a business, wants to get out on

00:16:38.100 his own, but maybe doesn't have any ideas. Do you have any, any thoughts about generating ideas and

00:16:43.580 solving problems in the world? Like you mentioned, did we just have on order, man, was there just a

00:16:48.120 post about following your passion or not? There may have been there. We always have, that's always

00:16:54.220 one of the underlying themes. So there's always conversations about this. So this is really

00:16:58.220 timely that we're talking about it now. You know, it's funny, depending on the day of the week,

00:17:02.140 I might have a different answer for you here. One part of me says, do what you love and what

00:17:07.040 you're passionate about. And the other side of me says, well, if you're starting a business,

00:17:11.600 cause you truly got to make some money and take care of your family, um, and some extra income

00:17:16.400 and stuff like that, then you don't necessarily have to start a business around your passion,

00:17:20.440 but I think you can be passionate about serving your family. And so that's where I say, okay,

00:17:27.260 well, what, what's a need out there? Identify a need and just go meet the thing. And maybe

00:17:32.060 you've got, you know, certainly if you've got experience in something that quickens the

00:17:36.140 learning curve for you, you know, if you play, if you love guitar and you can teach guitar lessons

00:17:40.780 and start a guitar school, then that's awesome. But I see, I also see a lot of guys that say,

00:17:46.500 well, I'm not going to do something unless I'm passionate about it. And I think that's a mistake

00:17:51.200 too. Uh, I just think as a, as a human being and as more in particular, a man, there are things

00:17:57.500 that we just need to do sometimes that we don't necessarily feel like doing.

00:18:02.960 In order to support those that we love. And, and I think in addition to that, if I can add

00:18:08.680 something to that, because I remember there's, there's been experiences in my life where I've

00:18:11.980 done things from a, from a professional standpoint that I haven't really enjoyed. One I can think of

00:18:16.480 is landscaping. I actually did electrical for a little while and that wasn't something I really

00:18:20.060 enjoyed. But at the end of the day, I came from it with the attitude, knowing that I was going to

00:18:24.640 transition into something else, but wanting to take everything I possibly could from that

00:18:29.940 experience. So that when I was ready to make a move and was ready to make a transition,

00:18:34.400 I was able to take these skills and these knowledges and these different ideas and

00:18:38.960 different concepts and implement them in other areas of my life that maybe I'm more passionate

00:18:42.680 about. Absolutely. You know, when you talked about taking the job as in landscaping or whether

00:18:47.860 it, it makes me think of, um, you know, if you go to LA right now and you go to a restaurant,

00:18:52.740 what are the chances of somebody waiting on you? That's an actress. 1.00

00:18:55.360 Right. Of course. Yeah. And what do they say? Yeah, I'm just doing this until I can

00:18:59.960 live my dream. Yeah. And I think they've got it, they've got it down pretty good in that

00:19:06.020 whole mindset. Like I'm not above waiting tables. I'm not above being a, you know, third shift

00:19:11.660 custodian, you know, I'll do what it takes because I got a bigger plan in mind. But right now this is

00:19:17.500 the need of the hour. I got to have some money to come in to fund my dream. And I think it's also

00:19:21.800 okay if you don't know what that big dream is yet, but in the meantime, you know, look for

00:19:26.020 opportunities to develop and grow and learn. Um, if you can put yourself in a, in a situation where

00:19:32.580 you, you learn how to truly serve people and you're dealing with people and you're putting out fires

00:19:38.780 and, and you're going to, you're going to learn a lot of things about navigating emotions and you

00:19:43.920 know, all that other stuff with, with customers. And so I think that's a great training ground for

00:19:48.480 many businesses. Yeah. I think there's this huge problem in society in general today. And that is

00:19:54.260 that I think a lot of people will just sit there and mope and feel sorry for themselves and complain

00:19:58.480 and gripe about the situation they're in and they feel entitled, right? I'm entitled to something

00:20:03.680 better I deserve, or I, I should have something better. And at the end of the day, if you should

00:20:07.440 have something better, you'd already have it because you will have earned it or you will have learned

00:20:11.000 the skills necessary to get to that point. Well, and also, I mean, Ryan, if, if you're that good at

00:20:16.220 what you do, if, you know, at what you say you are, time will tell, you know, you could go into a

00:20:22.360 business as the, the third shift security guard and end up running a division in, you know, uh,

00:20:29.100 and it, and it's happens all the time. There are people that they're like, Hey, that's all right.

00:20:32.660 This is just a short stop for me. I'm learning the ropes here and I'm going to figure this place

00:20:36.300 out and I'm going to own it one day, you know, back at, back in one of my painting companies that I

00:20:40.260 had, we loved bringing up a guy and turning them into a foreman who started as a laborer with us.

00:20:46.220 You know, I mean, we're, we're growing our own and there's a lot of business owners out there

00:20:50.340 that would give anything to have a trusted right hand man. But too many guys are knocking on their

00:20:56.800 door as the owner going, Hey, I'm awesome. You should hire me and give me a hundred grand a year

00:21:00.420 right now. You know what I mean? Where, where I think, I think you have a much better shot at making

00:21:06.520 that a hundred grand a year. If you come in and just say, Hey man, how can I, how can I make your

00:21:11.420 life better add value to you? Bring my mojo every day and, and help the culture around here get

00:21:17.320 better. I guarantee you there's a place for guys like that, even if they didn't want to start at

00:21:22.200 their own business, but they just wanted to move up and in their career. Well, and not, not only just

00:21:27.700 asking about what, what can I do to help, but I think we need to be self-starting. We need to be

00:21:34.740 motivated and take initiative. And that means identifying areas of weakness within your current

00:21:40.320 company or even in the market. And then taking the initiative to just do it. Don't ask for

00:21:45.780 permission. Just go out there and do it. And people, bosses, customers, clients, friends, family,

00:21:51.480 coworkers will start to recognize that in you and build you up as the leader without you having to

00:21:56.500 tell everybody you're the leader. Absolutely. I mean, one of the, there's an event I do down in,

00:22:01.240 I'm part of in Cabo every winter and January. And, um, one of the guys that puts the event on his

00:22:07.720 name's Jerry Nelson. He's one of the founders, a ticket master. He's 85, 86 year old guys at 44

00:22:13.140 companies. He, he found, uh, he drilled for water in the desert and developed Scottsdale.

00:22:19.620 So, um, well, the guy's been around the block a few times. Yeah. I mean, I'm at dinner with him.

00:22:24.760 And I said, I said, Jerry, at what point did your businesses really start to take off? When did you

00:22:30.100 really go, okay, I got this. And without hesitation, he said, when I learned to get out of my own way.

00:22:35.860 Hmm. And I said, what do you mean? He says, I can't control everything. I need good people

00:22:40.600 around me and I need to trust them and treat them like big boys and let them go do their thing.

00:22:44.860 And I share that story because Jerry's just, he's a, an example of the millions of business

00:22:51.580 owners that are out there that would give anything to have that person who takes initiative,

00:22:57.020 who will allow me to get out of my own way. There there's like, you know, uh, a hundred things

00:23:03.060 in my business that need to be done. And I'm honestly not good at like 98 of them.

00:23:07.800 Okay. So I would much rather hand it off and, um, and let you run with it. And, uh, and I,

00:23:16.360 I see that as in all the business owners I work with, one of their biggest struggles is finding that

00:23:21.140 right hand person who will take that initiative. I coach high school football. You and I have talked

00:23:26.940 about before and I, um, years ago we had this, this, uh, younger coach goes to my head coach buddy

00:23:34.680 and he says, Hey, I want to be the defensive coordinator next year. And we were going into

00:23:39.280 a new season and he said, all right, well, I'll tell you what, um, this season, he was a sophomore

00:23:43.660 coach, uh, head coach. He said, he says this season after the sophomore games, I want you to go up in the

00:23:49.240 box for our varsity games. I want you to scout our offense, our own team. And then he says,

00:23:55.280 I want you to break down the game film after that. And by Sunday night, I want to report on

00:24:00.260 how you would exploit our offense for the whole season. Basically. He said nine games. That was

00:24:06.200 his interview. Uh, guy wouldn't do it. He says, well, I'm not going to do it. If I'm, if I don't

00:24:10.280 have the title, I'm not doing that much work. Oh yeah. Everybody's wrapped up in that title,

00:24:13.900 right? Yep. Like you said it, you know, take the initiative. You see something that needs to be

00:24:18.160 done in the business that you're in, go get it. Just like serving a customer. Your, your employer is a

00:24:22.840 customer in a lot of ways too. They have pain and they have problems and needs and you know,

00:24:26.860 you can alleviate some of that. It's worth something to them. A good employer will find

00:24:30.640 a way to get you some more money. Let's jump back to these core concepts because I think I cut you

00:24:35.020 off and got sidetracked a little bit. I think you were going to talk about charging the right amount

00:24:38.180 or not being cheap. Let's talk about that. And then I want to move on to your strongpreneur pledge,

00:24:42.140 which is something I think myself and all men need to hear and be a little bit more aware of.

00:24:46.220 Sounds good. So yeah, there's, there's two more things that the one I won't elaborate on what,

00:24:49.920 so we had respect, we had clarity, consistency is huge. Once you realize, you know, that you need

00:24:56.000 to be doing certain things in your business, do them consistently. Don't, don't hop around from

00:25:02.420 thing to thing. So anyway, and that's mainly on the marketing side of things or it's in the

00:25:07.460 leadership side of things with, you know, the way you treat your people or hold them accountable

00:25:11.060 or whatever. But the last thing is the money mindset. I see so many business owners project their

00:25:15.880 beliefs about money onto their customers. Oh, there's no way they'd ever pay $5,000 for this.

00:25:21.540 Yeah.

00:25:21.920 You know? And I mean, obviously you, you, you're in money every day of your life, right?

00:25:26.120 Right.

00:25:26.520 So it's, I would work really, really hard to wipe your hard drive clean. If you have negative money

00:25:34.440 mindset and, and just don't set your prices based on the going rates. Don't set your prices based on

00:25:42.860 what you think they'll pay, but I would set pricing based on what it's worth to the client,

00:25:48.820 the value that it brings to the client, not even what it, what it costs you. If something costs you

00:25:54.360 a hundred dollars, that doesn't mean you should only charge 150 or $200 for that thing. You know,

00:26:00.100 there was a, uh, uh, in one of my Facebook groups, uh, for my business, we had a guy share,

00:26:06.340 um, he's like, man, I had a pipe break in my house over Thanksgiving weekend.

00:26:10.580 All the plumbers were closed. It's the middle of the night or it wasn't middle that it was a Sunday.

00:26:16.560 He would, he was out of town. That's what it was. He was out of town. I'm sorry. It wasn't

00:26:20.180 Thanksgiving. He was out of town. I have a great memory. It's just short. Um, so he was out of

00:26:25.700 town as wife and baby, two babies were home alone. So it's an emergency plumbing situation. The guy

00:26:31.420 charged 125 bucks to come out and deal with it. Oh yeah. And my buddy Andy was like, I would have paid

00:26:36.720 five grand. Yeah. Easily. You know? And so here's an example of a contractor who's totally hosing

00:26:42.720 himself. Cause I guarantee you, if I got into the life of that plumber that he hired, you would see

00:26:49.080 he's on the hamster wheel running himself ragged, trying to make a buck. He probably doesn't have

00:26:53.080 much money in the bank, you know, and his wife's upset because he's running around for nickels.

00:26:57.960 Cause I've been there. I was a painting contractor. I, I used to chart. You understand.

00:27:01.360 I totally get it. And, and I, I would bet, I would chop my pinky finger off in a bet right now

00:27:07.880 that I'm right about that particular plumber. And so that all starts with him having a, uh,

00:27:13.720 just a skewed money mindset, uh, and even a deeper view of himself and the value that he brings people.

00:27:20.660 So I would work really hard on making sure that my mindset was where it needed to be before I started

00:27:26.080 a business as far as money and my value is concerned. So I think we're going to answer that when

00:27:30.500 we get through this strong printer or pledge, because this is going to help bring some clarity

00:27:33.640 to guys that probably need to hear this and, and take their lives and their businesses and

00:27:38.400 their entrepreneurship to the next level. So let's, let's run through this. Cause this is really

00:27:41.900 valuable. The first time I saw this, I loved it. In fact, I need to create an order of man pledge.

00:27:46.680 So I'm going to ask you permission to be able to steal this a little bit from you.

00:27:49.340 Take it. It's all yours.

00:27:50.420 All right. So let's talk about number one.

00:27:53.400 Yeah. So number one, a strong printer pledge or the promise is, uh, I will shut up. It's just as

00:27:59.540 simple as that, that talk is cheap and what matters is what I get done. And so I, I want,

00:28:05.480 I want people to promise to talk less and do more. The world's full of talkers. You know,

00:28:10.520 I don't know much more to say about it other than that, because we've all been in situations where,

00:28:14.940 you know, somebody tells us one thing and they, they don't get the results that we need.

00:28:19.660 Right. Yeah. I think we have this desire. It's probably ego driven, but the desire to

00:28:23.700 talk and a lot of us like to hear ourselves talk myself included. I fall into this trap as well.

00:28:28.160 So when really we ought to just be listening, right? That's the advantage of even these

00:28:31.660 podcasts is I try to talk as little as possible because I want to hear what you have to say and

00:28:35.260 what the other 40 guys that we've interviewed have to say. So I can learn from that.

00:28:39.300 Yeah. And let me, let me say here, these, these promises are like at any given time,

00:28:43.240 you know, we're stronger, not so strong in one of them or a couple of them. So it's not like,

00:28:48.380 you know, you're ever going to arrive. So, but I would just encourage people to, uh,

00:28:53.120 just speak with their actions and less with, with their words. And, uh, cause people will notice

00:28:57.700 when you step up and do the things you need to do, the right people notice. Definitely.

00:29:01.900 Second one is, uh, I will do what I say I will do. And that just really comes down to no more

00:29:08.040 broken promises. This one came from looking back at, I had a, um, a residential painting company

00:29:14.940 outside of Chicago years ago, and we grew it to about a million bucks in the first three years.

00:29:18.620 And the average painting company residentially does about 300 grand a year. So we, we really

00:29:24.340 cranked it. And, um, we built it because we, we 100% of the time did what we said we would do.

00:29:30.980 If we said we were going to be there at four o'clock for a meeting, we were there at four o'clock.

00:29:35.980 Um, if we said we were going to clean up and you wouldn't have to lift a finger to clean up after we

00:29:40.600 were there, you didn't have to lift a finger to clean up. Um, and so the reason that company grew

00:29:46.340 so quickly and still to this day is doing really well, I sold my half to my business partner years

00:29:51.380 ago, um, is because of this number two thing that we simply do what we say we're going to do. And if

00:29:56.720 more businesses and individuals did that, uh, I think we'd have a much better, uh, environment.

00:30:02.780 Yeah.

00:30:03.060 Number three, I'll be hungry for mentoring. Hey, listen, I, whether you pay for coaching and

00:30:07.700 mentoring, or you have a good, you know, group of friends or a private Facebook group,

00:30:12.660 like order of men or whatever it is, uh, we all need somebody in our lives to, uh, point

00:30:19.700 out the things that we can't see. And, um, and so I, I encourage people to invite that

00:30:25.480 accountability, that encouragement from other, uh, other people as trusted advisors, you know,

00:30:31.180 Jim Rohn, the old motivational speaker says become the average of the five people you hang

00:30:34.660 out with the most. Yeah. Right. And, um, so, you know, look at the five and make sure that

00:30:39.640 your five has some strong mentors in it. Yeah. We're so afraid to bring mentors in. I think,

00:30:44.560 I don't know. It seems crazy to me because I have mentor. And here's the other interesting about a

00:30:49.540 thing about this concept is that we have mentors in a lot of areas of our life. We have spiritual

00:30:53.840 leaders. We have physical, you know, training like coaches, uh, even golf instructors. But then when it

00:31:01.540 comes to our life, our overall life, for example, or our businesses, for some reason we clam up and we

00:31:08.060 refuse to reach out to other people. And it's absolutely ridiculous. Every time I bring somebody

00:31:13.240 into my life, who's been more successful in any one area, my results automatically increase just

00:31:18.780 because I'm surrounded by that person. I'm, and I'm consuming the information and the lessons that

00:31:23.780 they've learned, the good lessons and the bad, the hard lessons they've learned as well.

00:31:26.540 Oh, absolutely. It's, uh, you know, and I, I have two, I have three kids and two teenage boys,

00:31:31.940 you know, and I'm giving them bits and pieces of my wisdom and I'm like, Oh, will you please just

00:31:36.740 listen? Yeah. Right. And they already know that dad, right? You know, my one son, he's like,

00:31:42.480 yeah, I got my plan worked out. I'm good. Thanks. Anyway. Good, good luck with that boy. Let me know

00:31:47.380 how that goes. Um, but you know, that's where, that's where your group has been so great. You

00:31:51.320 know, I mean, especially the private Facebook group, it's a safe place for guys to come

00:31:54.920 and dump, you know, I've shared a couple of things just about needing to be a better husband and dad

00:32:01.340 in the group. And that's great. You know, you get these other guys weighing in and, you know,

00:32:06.100 I've shared things about, uh, things I need to get done in my business. And then, you know,

00:32:10.940 the next morning you're like weighing in again. All right, Tom, how did you do on that?

00:32:15.340 Yeah. Yeah. You know, and so that's, um, the mentoring's out there and, and so you, you gotta

00:32:20.700 have it without it. We'll never grow to our full potential. Um, number four, uh, there's two more.

00:32:26.720 Number four is I will make no excuses, man. This, this comes from a lot of things, but,

00:32:31.580 uh, mostly just as my experiences being a high school football coach for 16 years,

00:32:36.900 at the end of the day, did you make the block or not? I don't even know why, you know, you run a

00:32:42.000 six yard hitch route and you didn't run it to the inside of the corner. And so he undercut it and

00:32:46.560 had a pick going the other way for a touchdown because you ran the route right route and kids

00:32:51.620 would come off the field and go, Oh, well I slipped or he had inside leverage on me.

00:32:56.620 Or he got across my face, or I think he jumped off sides coach and they didn't call it. And I

00:33:01.740 just got sick of hearing excuses. And it's the same way in business. It's the same way in our

00:33:05.800 relationships. At the end of the day, listen, if it's important to me, I'll find a way. If not,

00:33:10.040 I'll find an excuse. Yeah. And, uh, great point. So I, I would encourage everybody listening that the

00:33:16.080 next time you screw something up, try to notice where your mind and your mouth first goes. Am I about

00:33:22.780 to make an excuse or am I just going to raise my hand and go, my bad? Yeah. You know, it's funny.

00:33:27.520 I, in the group actually this morning, I posted something about intentions versus results. And

00:33:32.280 everybody wants to say, my intention was this and I wanted to do this and I wanted to have this.

00:33:37.200 But at the end of the day, we measure our success and other people measure our level of success,

00:33:40.800 especially when it comes to the people that are relying on us, like business partners and clients

00:33:44.780 and family by the results that we get, not by the intentions that we have. Yeah, absolutely. Let me

00:33:52.500 tell you a story on excuses here too. Cause, uh, I just told you my one son, he's like, I got my plan

00:33:58.060 and everything. So, but I, I want to give him props here too. He's his name's Tiga. He's, uh, he's 15.

00:34:05.360 He's from Haiti. We, all three of my kids, uh, uh, were adopted and Tiga's from Haiti. We brought him

00:34:10.300 home when he was just turning nine years old and he'd been here for about a year. He was still kind of

00:34:14.580 learning English. We're driving down the road and he goes, dad, in this little accent. And I go,

00:34:19.240 yeah, buddy. He goes, I would like to have a big house. And I go, well, dude, you are in the right

00:34:25.160 country. Absolutely. And, uh, I said, but it's going to take two things. The first thing it's

00:34:29.440 going to take is you're going to have to learn how to read because he'd really been struggling with

00:34:33.100 that and kind of getting lazy with it. And, uh, and I said, the second thing, dude, is you're going to

00:34:37.640 have to work really, really, really hard. And he gets quiet. He's in the passenger seat. I'm in the

00:34:42.780 driver's seat. We're cruising in my truck. He's looking out the window. It seemed like 10 minutes.

00:34:47.120 It was probably only about a minute. Yeah. And he gets really quiet and I could tell his mind is

00:34:51.740 moving and he turns and he goes, dad. And I said, yeah, man, he goes, I think I'm good with a small

00:34:59.080 house. And so he's trying to decide which one is more important, right? Yeah. So what I appreciate

00:35:06.840 about that is he, he wasn't going to make an excuse. You know, it wasn't, it was, Hey, I'm at

00:35:12.940 this point in my life, not willing to pay that price. Yeah. And that's okay to be there. I respect

00:35:18.900 that more than I respect the guy that says, yeah, I'm going to do this, this, this, and this. And he

00:35:24.420 comes back and all he does is make excuses of why it didn't happen. Yeah. So it actually brings me

00:35:29.480 back to my military days. It sounds like you were in the Marine Corps. Uh, but it brings me back. I

00:35:34.000 remember basic training. I, when I went, I had a couple of buddies who had gone through basic

00:35:38.420 training before and they said, just get used to the phrase, no excuses. If you mess up or a drill

00:35:43.960 sergeant's in your face and he's chewing you out, don't make excuses. Don't try to come up with a

00:35:49.040 reason that it didn't go through or it didn't work. Just say no excuses, drill sergeant. And I said that

00:35:53.840 so many times. And each and every time I said that the drill sergeant just looked at me and walked

00:35:59.020 off, but I saw other guys making excuses and it made life so much harder for them. And the drill

00:36:04.400 sergeants went on attack mode every time they tried to have an excuse for why they didn't perform the

00:36:08.860 way they should have. Yeah, absolutely. And you know, to me, being a strongpreneur is, is, um,

00:36:14.120 it's being a winner and winners find a way they just, they find a way. Um, and you know, being in the

00:36:20.040 military and I, you know, I was a Marine Corps, you know, listen, if our job is to take that town,

00:36:24.820 we need to take the town. We're going to find a way to do it. And, uh, even if it ain't pretty,

00:36:30.060 I'm going to find a way or, or, or in a, uh, in a business, I'm going to find a way to support

00:36:35.440 my family. Right. You know, uh, I'm not going to make excuses. I'm going to find a way winners

00:36:40.780 find a way they don't make excuses. So, uh, number five, last one here, man, I'll, I'll move on for you

00:36:46.960 is, uh, I will have fun. And what I wrote under that was I will enjoy the ride and lighten up.

00:36:51.740 If I'm not having fun, something's got to change. And, and that came from looking back,

00:36:56.540 you know, building one of my businesses years ago, when it became a drag for my partner and I,

00:37:03.000 it's when we stopped celebrating our little wins along the way. Uh, in the early days,

00:37:08.880 every time we'd make a sale, we would call or text the other guy. And I'd be like, Hey,

00:37:12.460 just sold 3,500 bucks. Yeah. You know? And then he'd text two hours later ago. Yeah. Well,

00:37:16.760 I just got five grand, you know? And I would text and I go, okay, I got a thousand bucks.

00:37:20.880 And it was like little celebrations along the way. And we had a lot of fun and we did a lot

00:37:26.260 of laughing. And as we grew the business and that it got bigger. And I think, uh, me personally,

00:37:32.080 I just stopped enjoying the ride. And so I really want to encourage people to have fun. At the end

00:37:40.000 of the day, this is a business. It's not, it's really not your life. It shouldn't define who you

00:37:44.640 are. Businesses can come and go, but you get one shot at life and having fun. And I, I needed to

00:37:50.680 make, you know, looking back, you know, I wish I would have made it more fun along the way for my

00:37:55.380 family and my, you know, my wife and my kids as I was building it. So I really encourage people to

00:38:00.160 have fun. So valuable Tom. I appreciate it. I've got to ask you questions. We wind things down and

00:38:04.560 you know, I ask all my guests this question and that is, what does it mean to be a man?

00:38:09.140 Well, you're, uh, you're ripping off the idea for the pledge for me.

00:38:13.580 That's right. And, and I'm, I'm ripping off your definition of this that you shared on my podcast

00:38:19.200 a while ago. Okay. Because that's fair. That's fair. Because when you said it, it resonated with me

00:38:24.820 in such an awesome way because I, and I, and I've honest to God, it's been on my mind for,

00:38:30.020 you know, a week and a half now I'm like, no, this, this works. And it's basically a man is somebody

00:38:35.240 who is accountable and responsible for their life. You know, that's, that's what I remember

00:38:40.040 from our talk. And, and, um, and as I look at that, I'm like, you know what? That works. I mean,

00:38:45.740 that 100% works. And it led into some great discussions I had with one of my sons the other

00:38:50.600 day. And so I'm, I'm just kind of stealing what, what you gave me, man. Tom, I couldn't have said it

00:38:55.380 better myself. Hey, I want to let you know, I appreciate you. I appreciate all you're doing

00:38:59.380 in the conversations we've had. Tell us, uh, tell us how we can connect with you and learn a little bit

00:39:03.720 more about what you're doing with strongpreneur nation. Yeah. I'd love people to head over to

00:39:07.060 strongpreneurnation.com. And, um, there's a lot of content there. There's some blogs,

00:39:12.460 there's a podcast on iTunes, uh, where I interview, uh, people that are doing, you know, really cool

00:39:17.900 things in their life and in their business. The whole gist of what I'm doing there is simply to

00:39:22.000 help people do that. It's just to be stronger personally and professionally. And we deal with,

00:39:27.140 you know, the head trash, we help you get back your time, build a company that, you know,

00:39:32.180 um, you'll be proud of. Uh, so we have, uh, a lot of good stuff going on over there. So I'd love

00:39:38.060 people to just check us out there. You can also hit us up on Facebook. Uh, we have a strongpreneur

00:39:43.180 mastermind group. It's a private group. Just, uh, hit us up. We'll let you into the group

00:39:47.060 and, uh, you'll get other content videos and things there. Tom, I appreciate you. I know you're

00:39:51.600 doing great things over there. I follow you. I track what you're doing. You've been insightful

00:39:54.620 in some of the stuff that we're doing with order of man. So I really want to let you know that,

00:39:58.840 uh, that I'm grateful for you and appreciate you. Thanks for joining us on the show today.

00:40:02.060 Thanks for having me, Ryan. I really appreciate it, man. There you have it guys. Mr. Tom

00:40:05.480 rubber enlightening us with some of his entrepreneurial wisdom. Make sure you follow

00:40:08.980 Tom, check out his work. Him and I have really hit it off and that our personalities are very

00:40:12.800 much alike. We don't mess around. And both of us have the ability to cut out the clutter

00:40:16.840 when it comes to taking control of our life. Keep in mind also the elite mastermind iron council.

00:40:22.940 You will want to be part of that. If you're ready to take your life to the next level,

00:40:25.920 if you're committed to actually making big change in your life, this is how we're going to do it.

00:40:30.120 We're going to build some solid relationships with each other. And you're going to have more

00:40:35.060 accountability in your life, which I know is just as important for me as it is for you.

00:40:39.500 Remember also our weekly giveaway by our friends over at Seneca Creek had order man.com slash

00:40:44.040 Seneca Creek giveaway for to enter. And also keep in mind, it's a weekly drawing. So if you don't win

00:40:49.180 this week and or again, because you might just win next week, guys, I look forward to talking

00:40:53.360 with you next week. But until then, take action and become the man you were meant to be.

00:41:09.040 Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your life

00:41:13.680 and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.

00:41:23.360 Thank you.

00:41:24.360 Thank you.

00:41:25.360 Thank you.

00:41:26.360 Thank you.

Order of Man - January 19, 2016

OoM 044： Taking Ownership of Your Life Through Entrepreneurship with Tom Reber

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