OoM 072： Dominate in Any Environment with Niyi Sobo
Episode Stats
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Summary
Niyi Shobo is a former NFL running back for the New Orleans Saints and an All-American Oregon State Beaver. After his professional NFL career, Niyi began his firefighting career and earned his position in just six months without any background or experience. In his spare time, he started working as a mindset and performance coach for athletes and top performers. He is the father of five, the host of Sports Motivation Podcast, and the founder of Imnotyou, where he is dedicated to teaching athletes and other top performers the mindset and systems they need to dominate in any environment.
Transcript
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Dominate anything. That's what we're going to talk about today. I'm sure you felt at times in your life that you just weren't operating to your full capacity.
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So whether that was a conscious decision or you just didn't know how to break out to that next level, you just felt like you left something on the table.
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My guest today, former NFL running back Nii Shobo, teaches us how to create our ultimate vision, ask for and implement feedback, and dominate in any environment.
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You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.
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When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time. You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong.
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This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become.
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At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.
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Gentlemen, what's going on today? My name is Ryan Michler, and I am your host and the founder of Order of Man.
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As always, I'm glad you're here with us today. This is the manliest show available.
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So, if you're a man and you want to improve in your life, you are in the right place.
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Today, we're talking about dominating in any environment, but we also talk about the science of planning out your day and building confidence, approaching women, building businesses, and a ton more.
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We bring on Navy SEALs, professional athletes, New York Times bestselling authors, and so many more high-caliber guests, and we really dig into their minds for the best information to help you do big things in your life.
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Now, before I get into the show today, know that you can get all the links and the resources from this conversation at orderofman.com slash 072.
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And also, you're going to want to make sure you join in our closed men's Facebook group for a deeper conversation on the topic of dominating in any environment at facebook.com slash groups slash orderofman.
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Now, let me introduce you to my guest, Niyi Shobo. Niyi is a former NFL running back for the New Orleans Saints and an All-American Oregon State Beaver.
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After his professional NFL career, Niyi began his firefighting career and earned his position in just six months without any background or experience.
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In his spare time, he started working as a mindset and a peak performance coach for athletes and top performers.
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He is the father of five, the host of Sports Motivation Podcast, and the founder of imnotyou.com, where he is dedicated to teaching athletes and other top performers the mindset and systems they need to dominate in any environment.
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Niyi, what's up, brother? Glad you made it on the show today.
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Yeah, I've been following you for some time now. You've been on some friends' podcasts, and I'm stoked to get you on the show.
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Tell us real quick, as we get started, what it is you're doing now, how you even got into this work that you're doing now,
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because you've got an amazing backstory, and you've come a long way, and you just told me, even before we hit record on this show,
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that you've just made this transition to full-time with your coaching and some of the things you're doing now,
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so I'm excited for you, and I want to hear what that's all about.
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Absolutely, man. So I grew up in Portland, Oregon, the Northwest, man, and I actually grew up playing soccer,
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and so I was the third out of four boys, but I fell in love with football when I was in seventh grade, and just that took me.
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I just fell in love, man, and so I played in high school.
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See how many people we can offend before we get started here.
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Yeah, man, so it was funny because, like I said, I was the only one of my brothers who played,
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and it was kind of like my dad didn't even know what football was. He came from Nigeria here when he was 18,
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and so I fell in love with that and ended up walking on to Oregon State, and I played there for three years,
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but I was a walk-on, so that's kind of like being an unpaid intern, you know what I mean,
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where you're kind of just like low on the totem pole. So I had my first kid while I was in college,
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and at the time, man, it was like I was getting some playing time and things like that at Oregon State,
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but it was like I wanted a scholarship, and I believed I deserved one, so that was the first.
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I emailed the coaches at Portland State and was like, yo, could I get a scholarship?
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And sure enough, I got one, and just a couple weeks later, I was at Portland State,
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And the first year there, I didn't really get as much playing time as I wanted,
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but my last year is when it really blew up for me, and I had a breakout season
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and ended up becoming an All-American and then getting picked up for the New Orleans Saints,
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So that was an amazing experience, man, and like a dream come true,
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but ultimately it got cut short, you know, due to injury and things like that,
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And so after, once I came back, it was like I'm sure people can relate to, you know,
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you've tried, you've invested so much time and energy into something,
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you get it, and then it's kind of taken from you,
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or you feel like it's not happening anymore, and then you're kind of lost.
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And so much of your identity was tied up into something.
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And it was funny because I actually never even felt like I was one of those guys who,
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you know, football is life, but as soon as it got taken from me,
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it was like, damn, I guess football was life, you know what I mean?
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Yeah, well, and you wrap up your identity around it, right?
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And I wasn't very conscious of it, but I just did, man.
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I was wandering around for about two to three years working at jobs I didn't like.
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But in the meantime, I was working with athletes at this gym that I was training out of,
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And so I was initially doing a lot of physical training and teaching them how to eat right
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And what I was realizing is that what these guys need, man, is,
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and everyone's out there looking for tactics and strategies and stuff like that
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We're always trying to find like little, you know, little hacks and things to do this.
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But at the end of the day, it's really like, are you able to bring it when it's time to bring it?
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Like, do you have the mental stamina and endurance to actually last through the inevitable challenges
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Because these athletes, they're trying to reach all these big goals.
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And it's like, I can teach you how to squat and how to, you know, do this cool footwork stuff.
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So ultimately, I made the shift to start focusing 100% on the mindset.
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And that means, like, the way that you think, setting your mind up so that you can dominate in any environment.
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And so I also became a firefighter a few years ago as well as I was decided that I wanted to get a quote-unquote,
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you know, good job, right, and safe benefits and all that.
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And the story of how I became a firefighter was really cool as well because I had no experience.
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And mind you, I also am married and have five children as well.
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So at some point, it's like something has to give.
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Like, I'm literally maxing out in all of these areas.
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And we know that anytime you're doing a bunch of things, like, you're not doing anything really well.
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So I decided, man, that I knew what I wanted to do.
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And that's teach people how to think, you know, how to develop that mindset to dominate in any environment.
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And so I just decided, man, that I was going to retire early as a firefighter.
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And I'm doing what I'm doing full-time now, which is imnotyou.com.
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I also have a podcast called the Sports Motivation Podcast where I share a lot of mindset shifts and strategies and things for people to take their sport and their careers to the next level.
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You know, like, yeah, no, I know what it's like.
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I want to break some of this down because obviously there's a lot to this.
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But before I get too much into the mindset piece that I do want to talk with you about today, I want to back up.
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I want to know what about football appealed to you.
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Because you were playing at the high school level all the way up to professional level.
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I never made it into college or anything like that.
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And I'm really curious as to why it was such a draw for you when I think you said seventh grade you started, right?
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So I was actually playing soccer all the way up until then.
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And I was kind of I like soccer, but I started getting a little chubby about fifth grade.
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And so I would be first of all, I hated running and I would be running over these kids in games and parents would be screaming at me and screaming at the press.
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And so I had a lot of friends were playing football and I and I didn't have a TV growing up either.
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So it wasn't like I was I knew who Jerry Weiss was and all these players.
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And I just it was some about the physicality of it that, you know, I grew up with with three brothers.
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So needless to say, we're very physical and fighting all the time.
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And I was also considered the quote unquote shy one in my family.
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And so I think that was also an area where I can really like I feel like I really express myself because listening to me now, I'm not shy, by the way.
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I was just something I thought about myself when I was young.
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But yeah, I wouldn't have guessed that about you.
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Right. But it's crazy because I yeah, I just love the physicality of it.
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But there's something about the team dynamics on a football team.
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And even just how you play once a week and it's almost like you don't take games for for granted as much.
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And even now, like I don't watch it as much anymore.
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And my son decided that he wants to play football now.
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But I'm not I'm excited for them, but I never pushed it on him.
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Like I'm I was actually really, really happy when he decided that he wanted to play.
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To follow in his dad's footsteps, I bet it's a cool thing.
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One of the things you talked about was getting a scholarship.
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And I think a lot of guys would have not received that scholarship or walked on and been satisfied with that and not even make made the approach to the team or the school of like, hey, I deserve a scholarship.
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I'm sure there was some hesitancy and some fear and even asking for that.
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And I know a lot of guys are whether that's asking for a promotion or even asking a woman
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on a date where they've got some fear and they've got some reservation, but just overcoming that
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and then actually going to do it and then working out for you.
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And that's a great question, because that's actually where the I'm not you mentality comes
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It's I'm not you is the mentality that says 98 percent of businesses fail within whatever
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Like anyone who starts something, if you go with that that herd mentality like, oh, you
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know, most people do this or this is what I always identified with the small minority
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of people who actually do accomplish something.
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However, because I had that mentality, I got so much more out of myself and push myself to
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And it led me to accomplish more, to do more, to be more when I didn't I wasn't the
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biggest and fastest and strongest by any means.
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So when I was at Oregon State, I had, like you said, many friends who were like, you know,
00:10:34.600
dude, you're playing Pac-10 is Pac-10 at the time.
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Like playing with all these different guys who are now in the NFL and great facilities,
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I didn't come here just to, like, sit on a bench and, you know, go to parties and say
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And so for me, it wasn't even like a it wasn't even an option.
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It was like for me, it was more pain not to do that.
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So a lot of people let fear, you know, dictate the decisions that they make.
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It's like I'm more scared of staying here and knowing that I could have done something
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with my career as opposed to just be a role player.
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And so I had I had close friends in my ear telling me that I had even coaches on my team
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on Oregon State were telling me whatever, whatever.
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And I was like, no, man, I'm going I'm getting a scholarship.
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So I did what I felt like anyone should do when there's a situation that they're not satisfied
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with, which is like moving in the direction of where you want to go.
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Like, I didn't know what to do, but I'm like, I know every team has a website.
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So I go on a website and sure enough, all the coaches emails are right there.
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I email a coach and he hits me back the next day and I get a scholarship just like that.
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And it's and it's it's and I used a bunch of practice film with some game film as well.
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But it's and it's that's the mentality I've had with a lot of things is I think being creative
00:12:03.080
and being resourceful, especially when you talk about being a man.
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Like if you a man, you have to be proactive, you have to be creative, you have to use your
00:12:12.580
There's a reason why, you know, most people are not living the lives that they want to,
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But you're not using what you have, like you have to be creative.
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And it's something that I consciously instill in myself on a daily basis and sort of take
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inventory, you know, frequently to make sure that I'm using and accessing all my resources.
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It's like there's a book, I think it's called The Aladdin Factor by Jack Canfield, the dude
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who wrote, you know, Chicken Soup for the Soul and all that.
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I remember reading that and it was crazy because I always felt like I did ask and I read
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that book and I was like, wow, like there are so many things that I just accepted that
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A lot of the things that I've been able to do have been as simple as me just reaching out
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What if they said, no, you're not getting a scholarship?
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Tell me what that would have looked like for you.
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Man, so let me let me think about that because I reached out to a lot of teams.
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And so it's hard to say what I would have done.
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I would have thought that there's still a way for me to get whatever it is that I want.
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So, for example, what I wanted, I would have loved to still stay at Oregon State and get
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But the way it was looking at it, the reality was that the coach was kept telling me that
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And then they'll give you a scholarship like your last two semesters.
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So it's like what I would have done is would have kept reaching out to other schools, you
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know, and if that didn't work out, I would have kept playing at Oregon State and something
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Like I would have kept going hard because even how I got playing time when I was there,
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But the way I got noticed is that I would play as the other team's fullback and scout
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I'm playing the USC's fullback and I'm blasting the linebackers.
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I'm going full out, just giving them headaches.
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And the coach is looking, the offensive coordinator, I remember Paul Chris, he's looking, he's
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telling Coach Riley, Coach Mike Riley at the time, he's like, hey, man, we got to put
00:14:31.360
this dude, we got to find some sort of package for this dude.
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And the same guys who I was making mad are now the main ones advocating for me to get
00:14:44.260
And so that's another thing that I see a lot with athletes and not just athletes that
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I work with, but entrepreneurs, grown men who are so worried about what other people
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think that are so scared to do what's necessary, not to ruffle feathers.
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And they're not even helping the other people who they think they're helping.
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Athletes are so worried about what other teammates are saying, not being vocal out there.
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You're just accepting situations that you don't like.
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I want to know what separates the guys that are maybe playing at the college level that
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Because at that point, as far as physicality and the ability to get the job done, I imagine
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But there's got to be something that separates making that next step, right?
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And there's a lot of elements, and I'll do my best to boil it down to a few key ones.
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But at the end of the day, and we've all heard this, it's about how you think, right?
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But I believe that what you think about, your mindset, your beliefs, leads to how you feel,
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and how you feel leads to what you do and ultimately leads to what you get.
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So with these guys who are succeeding at the highest level, and I'll go with when I was at
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the pro level, so you got all pros, and you got guys like Drew Brees, right, who are-
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And this dude, 6'1", he's very unassuming when you see him.
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Yeah, he's not your traditional guy that you would think fits that quarterback role, right?
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So the biggest thing that separates these guys, they have unreasonably high standards for
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So what I mean by that is, what's okay for another athlete to do is not okay for Drew Brees
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So all that is, is a standard that says, I've got to be there early.
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They don't, they're waking up 15 minutes before, they're not watching film.
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They're not doing the little exercises before and after practice, doing shoulder rehab every
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They're not out there doing footwork every single day.
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So with every, for example, everyone listening, just ask yourself, I like to do this as a reality
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Take a piece of paper, put a line down the middle.
00:17:00.760
On one side, write all the things you say you want to have, right?
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And then on the other side, just write down what your current standards are.
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And it's, and you'll just have a real reality check as to, is I say that I want, am I doing
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So with the guys in the league, they got the guys who are at another level, they hold themselves
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to a very high standard and they don't make excuses.
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Like you, you, you, you take your situation and you accept it and you do something about
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And when I say accept it, I mean, you accept responsibility for it, for it, meaning it's
00:17:42.920
And this is one thing that, um, that I harp on with my kids all the time that I feel like
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if I'm successful in this, they're going to have pretty good lives.
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Because if you can own your problems and not put them or shirk responsibility or put it
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on anyone else, um, that's going to take you far.
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So I think that's the biggest thing with those guys who are, who succeed even in college,
00:18:01.800
you know, like guys just have low standards, man.
00:18:04.220
It's like things that are okay for them are just not okay for other players.
00:18:07.180
And they also have a really strong desire and they have their, their goals are attached
00:18:13.820
And it, that something big can be, you know, their family.
00:18:17.240
It can be, you know, personal success or whatever.
00:18:19.420
I'm not going to judge anyone's reasons, but whatever reasons they have, they're very,
00:18:25.780
So we've all heard this is a, you know, anyone who reads any self-help book always talks about
00:18:29.500
you got to know your why, but it's, there's a reason why you say that you have to know
00:18:33.200
what are the driving forces behind what you're doing and all the guys who, who I've seen
00:18:39.720
succeed, myself included, when I've been able to separate myself from the pack, I just had
00:18:52.300
We're just a month and a half away now and things are coming together.
00:18:54.760
If you're like the men that are attending the event, you are looking for a way to become
00:19:00.040
So whether that means growing your business, connecting with your wife and kids, making
00:19:03.620
more money, getting back in shape after letting it go for a few years, or just wanting to
00:19:07.860
live a life more fulfilled, you are ready for more.
00:19:10.880
And that's what the order of man uprising is all about.
00:19:13.000
It's a men's retreat with a series of fireside masterminds, events and activities and access
00:19:17.280
to all the tools and all the resources you need to kill it at life.
00:19:21.040
So everything is completely included food, lodging, event instruction.
00:19:24.100
All you have to do is get to Las Vegas by September 15th, 2016 at 11 a.m.
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So make sure you jump on them as soon as you possibly can.
00:19:34.520
Go to orderofman.com slash uprising to reserve that spot.
00:19:43.900
Because I think it's probably pretty easy to coast, especially if you're looking at your
00:19:48.720
team or your employees or the relationships that you already have to coast in any area of
00:19:53.960
And so I'm really curious what separates a guy like you from somebody who might have
00:19:57.880
all of the talent, but maybe not have the same drive, motivation or standards that a
00:20:06.340
It wasn't like at every point in my career, I had high standards.
00:20:09.280
There were several episodes or periods at the time, even like when I came back after, you
00:20:14.200
know, playing football and got released from the New Orleans Saints.
00:20:20.940
But I definitely think it's something that can be taught.
00:20:24.860
So whether or not someone's born with it or not, I don't know.
00:20:27.320
I'm not going to get into like, I don't know, you know, genetics or whatever.
00:20:29.940
But I do I do know that your environment does have a big influence on you.
00:20:34.880
But let's say you grew up in an environment that didn't foster this type of mentality.
00:20:41.980
I really do believe that everything that you have all stems from your conditioned habitual
00:20:48.520
And so if you start to change those habitual thoughts and this is what I help people do
00:20:52.940
consciously and you cannot have to wait for it to be an accident in order to do that.
00:20:57.660
So I definitely think that it is something that that can be conditioned and can be taught
00:21:02.460
and that anyone can have this mentality and can take it to any situation.
00:21:06.020
And that's why I say dominate in any environment, because you've got to be able to to to trust
00:21:11.100
yourself to win no matter the circumstances, no matter the situation, because with a lot
00:21:15.100
of athletes, it's like it's not just about playing on game day.
00:21:19.000
There are so many other elements that are affecting your ability to do that.
00:21:24.100
Like, how do you handle, you know, problems at home?
00:21:26.500
How do you handle, you know, friends, negative influences, et cetera?
00:21:30.020
These are all things that have an impact on whether or not you're able to bring it on game
00:21:33.140
So you've got to be able to dominate in that area.
00:21:35.480
So how do you do that if you've never had maybe a history of success or the ability to
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And how do you even recognize that it needs to be changed?
00:21:45.540
Because sometimes we get stuck in our box and stuck in our ways.
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We don't even see how we're behaving or the things that we're thinking and doing are
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I had the first one with my kids just last week.
00:22:00.460
And so, as a matter of fact, I was listening to your to your podcast with Ryan Holiday
00:22:07.500
And he was talking he was quoting Robert Greene and Robert Greene's book, 50th Laws, one of
00:22:12.640
But Robert Greene said, stay tied to reality like a spider to its web.
00:22:17.060
So you've got to have systems set in place that keep you grounded in reality.
00:22:24.740
I I'm constantly getting feedback, seeing myself objectively and watching my plans and
00:22:32.120
And so I have accountability partners who I talk to twice a week.
00:22:35.720
I have surveys that I give to my wife and kids and they tell me how I'm doing.
00:22:39.320
There's specific questions that they ask to show me how I'm showing up.
00:22:42.580
And then with my kids just a couple of weeks ago or just last week, we sat down and did a
00:22:46.720
family reality check because I felt like there was a lot of things going on with my kids and
00:22:50.540
my family that's like, listen, y'all, we got to start owning our we got to start owning our
00:22:56.440
So if you over here crying and complaining, it's important that you know the role that
00:23:01.700
And I think that's important for for not just for kids, but for people in general.
00:23:06.040
So like you said, a lot of people get caught up in their little worlds and what their
00:23:10.140
little stories about what they think is is happening.
00:23:14.620
Get yourself a group of friends who will keep it real with you.
00:23:17.640
That's why all the top level CEOs, all the top performers have coaches.
00:23:21.820
They have an extra layer, many extra layers of accountability because they can't afford
00:23:30.760
They said that one of the reasons they were so successful in the 90s is that they were aggressive
00:23:36.080
They were humble, meaning they were humble enough to learn and they learn faster.
00:23:40.560
And that's why they're able to grow so much more exponentially than other people.
00:23:44.060
So Phil Jackson would come in the locker room right after a loss.
00:23:47.640
And he would say he would immediately own his mistakes.
00:23:50.820
He would own all of his mistakes and not for the sake of being falsely humble, but he would
00:23:54.700
do it so that other guys would feel comfortable doing and also so they can grow quicker.
00:23:59.120
So then the next game, they're able to correct those mistakes.
00:24:09.860
I don't run from it and not scared from it because and everyone should read that book.
00:24:16.300
That's a bitch slap in the face for any like I mean that I had anxiety when I was reading
00:24:21.000
that book and that's how I knew I needed to be reading it.
00:24:24.900
You have to have that that that those systems set in place to make sure that you don't get
00:24:32.520
And then the next thing is just daily conditioning those those habits and thoughts.
00:24:37.280
But one of the first things I do when when people come to me is we got to identify what
00:24:43.280
What is what how do you want to see yourself so that we can move in that direction?
00:24:47.620
Because too many people get caught up in doing a whole counseling thing where we're sitting
00:24:51.040
down and talking about our past and we'll do that.
00:24:53.480
However, it's more important to be pulling you towards some as opposed to just reflecting
00:24:58.820
on all the things that happened in the past or how you used to be.
00:25:06.480
I want to jump back to your accountability partner for a minute, because I think a lot
00:25:09.320
of guys know that they need to have something like this.
00:25:11.260
When you say you've got accountability partners in your life, what does that actually look
00:25:14.660
Are these buddies that you're hanging out with?
00:25:16.120
Are these professional type accountability partners?
00:25:19.740
So for me, that looks like first off, I have a coach who I meet with three times a month
00:25:25.380
He knows the things that I'm trying to do and he helps me get through that.
00:25:28.460
Secondly, I have two friends who I one I talk to twice a week and another I talk to once
00:25:33.820
And again, the most important thing with those friends is that they know what I'm trying
00:25:39.920
They know who I want to be and how I want to show up and that they see everything that's
00:25:49.980
But we also call each other out whenever we're struggling with something or we see emotional
00:25:56.980
You know, and I give them full reign to do that.
00:26:00.380
That's one of the purposes of our relationship and our cause.
00:26:08.900
But there's a reason why everyone's talking about it.
00:26:11.900
And there's also a reason why a lot of you are not doing it.
00:26:16.500
When's the last time you sat down with your wife and asked her, how am I doing in X, Y,
00:26:31.280
That's the exact reason why you need to hear it.
00:26:33.680
When's the last time you asked your kids how you're showing up as a father?
00:26:39.300
If you don't know that, then you're not going to be able to get better.
00:26:41.440
That's gold that they can give you that you're not getting all because all for the sake of
00:26:48.340
And so also the surveys that I mentioned that some any father, any husband can do.
00:27:02.560
And that way when you review it, you don't have to have your ego involved.
00:27:07.780
You know, you can look at the answers and you can do with it what you want.
00:27:11.720
But do you want to get where you say you want to get?
00:27:15.500
If so, you have to deal with things as they are right now.
00:27:21.800
Because I know like for me, I've gotten feedback and I tend to believe that I enjoy feedback
00:27:28.420
But I still notice my ego creeping in, even though I'm very aware of the fact that I need
00:27:33.160
What do you do personally to get past that stuff?
00:27:37.760
First is I understand and know that the ego is never going to leave.
00:27:43.920
So it's not like I'm just going to be at Jesus-like level.
00:27:53.500
I actually like it when I get to feel uncomfortable because that means that that's usually something
00:28:00.140
So when my heart's beating and I don't want to hear the real truth or when I find myself
00:28:05.080
not wanting to read the survey responses that I give to my team advisors who listen to my
00:28:12.020
podcast each episode and tell me the things that they like that they don't like, I find
00:28:16.600
myself sometimes not wanting to check that because I'd like to believe that I have the
00:28:22.300
But those are always good signs for me because that just means I need to do it.
00:28:26.360
So I guess the easy answer is just be quiet, I guess.
00:28:30.980
So when someone's talking to you, don't say anything.
00:28:34.160
So when my kids are, you know, you could feel your ego creep up, but I just be quiet.
00:28:38.320
I no longer say anything because as soon as I start defending myself, I always tell my
00:28:42.540
kids, when you find yourself defending yourself all the time, that's because you're weak.
00:28:52.240
When you hear feedback, come from a place of strength and power because a lot of people
00:28:59.700
And it's like, sure, listen, it doesn't make you a horrible person if you, you know, if
00:29:03.820
you, if someone didn't like your podcast or if someone returns the product that they bought
00:29:09.900
All it means is that you can improve and you should love that and enjoy that and embrace
00:29:17.280
So next, let's talk about how you tactically implement some of this advice.
00:29:20.440
So you're getting some feedback from your wife, your kids, people listening to the podcast,
00:29:24.000
your, your accountability partners, what do you do to tactically implement what it is
00:29:33.760
So I usually let my, my ultimate vision determine what I need to do.
00:29:38.620
So a great question for me is what does my ultimate vision in whatever category, right?
00:29:43.300
So let's say as a husband, what is my, I, I, first of all, you have to have an ultimate
00:29:47.660
So I have all my life broken into categories and I have visions.
00:29:51.060
I have what I call a G code was as a set of standards and my philosophy on how I should
00:29:56.060
approach that and an overall game plan with some goals, et cetera.
00:30:02.400
And so when you start to hear these patterns, like these same patterns that come up, then
00:30:10.280
I have goals set up around these certain categories and I just implement slowly.
00:30:14.740
And I like to communicate also with, I don't implement everything.
00:30:18.520
So I get a lot of feedback, you know, for example, with my podcast, I have my team of
00:30:22.840
I get a bunch of feedback telling me, Oh, it'd be cool if you do this.
00:30:28.960
I can't remember who said it, but it's think big, act small.
00:30:32.400
So like it's, you can't implement everything, but act small and make sure that like you're
00:30:38.640
Just that awareness alone starts to, you'll, you'll find that when you start getting comfortable
00:30:42.960
hearing the feedback, you're going to become more aware.
00:30:45.460
And even in the situations that do come up, you're going to be able to do something about
00:30:48.940
So I also like communicating with people really close to me, what my plans are to change.
00:30:55.200
So we're talking about accountability partners, your kids, your wife, because they can hold
00:30:59.960
So for example, if I tell my wife, yo, every morning I'm working out at eight o'clock, she
00:31:05.920
If she sees that I'm still in my office at 830, you know what I mean?
00:31:09.360
And so that's just an example of some small things you can do to, uh, to implement it.
00:31:13.800
And then I have what I call target practice, which is a set of, a set of continuous practices
00:31:19.920
or, or habits, if you will, that I always want to monitor and keep up on.
00:31:24.560
And I check those off on a daily, weekly basis.
00:31:28.580
It's just like, you know, success one-on-one, just identify the things that have to be done
00:31:32.460
consistently and make sure that you're doing them and have a system for doing that.
00:31:38.220
I talk a lot about this because we talk, I think a lot of people talk about results and
00:31:43.060
You've got to start with the end of mind, but the reality is if you just focus on the
00:31:45.800
few actions, maybe two, three, five actions that'll help yield the results, regardless
00:31:49.940
of worrying about it, that they'll just produce those results naturally.
00:31:53.640
I think you're going to have a lot more success.
00:31:55.980
And it, and it is a balance, you know, cause I think I was caught up, you know, early on where
00:32:00.180
I would focus a lot on results and ignore some of these other things.
00:32:03.000
And that's where people get delusional a little bit.
00:32:04.700
It's like, you do have to bring it down to a granular level and say, all right, what
00:32:08.480
has to be done on a daily basis for me to consistently get those results?
00:32:13.000
So what are the categories that you've broken it down to?
00:32:15.700
You said you've got different categories of life.
00:32:20.400
So I actually have 18 categories and I won't, I won't go into all of them, but yeah, go into
00:32:26.660
So I have it personal and then business or in professional slash business.
00:32:33.760
I used to have all of my relationships bagged into one.
00:32:37.040
And I was like, nah, my wife needs her own category.
00:32:41.260
I have what I call my Wolfpack category and that's my kids.
00:32:44.340
So that's me as a father and sort of in that role.
00:32:51.180
That's a, that's what I'm, I really liked that category.
00:32:53.140
It's basically a category for how I organize my life and my, my wardrobe and things like
00:33:00.200
And that's really big time as a father as well.
00:33:02.280
Of course, you got money and finances and things like that.
00:33:10.140
I have my friends in my, my power circle, if you will.
00:33:15.460
Obviously in my business, you have, I have my coaching program.
00:33:18.340
I have my podcast and marketing and things like that.
00:33:21.120
But for anyone else, like there's no right or wrong in terms of how you set up your categories,
00:33:25.080
but you've got to have some sort of way to filter information so that like, before I
00:33:30.660
did this, it felt like in my mind, it was just all these papers.
00:33:33.440
Like my mind was an office or just papers everywhere.
00:33:35.720
But now it's like filed cabinets, you know, for when information comes at me, I can file
00:33:41.060
it in a certain way and it just feels so much better that way.
00:33:46.440
Because I hear a lot of guys will say, I don't know how to balance between two categories,
00:33:51.920
So how do you personally get some of this balance in your life?
00:33:55.020
So balance is an interesting word and I guess I'm still refining my philosophy and how I
00:34:00.660
I'll say this because I, let me not, I don't want to act like I have the game figured out
00:34:07.960
I believe that everything should be working together.
00:34:11.240
So when I say break your life into categories, I don't mean be so rigid and say like, oh, right
00:34:16.140
now I'm doing, I mean, there is going to be some of that and there has to be,
00:34:19.340
but it's, everything has just got to be attached to a higher purpose.
00:34:23.620
So when I started doing this and I have a really strong purpose for all these different
00:34:27.760
categories and they all fit into this big scheme, this one big plan, I don't really
00:34:35.800
Like if that makes sense, like it's just life and life gets messy.
00:34:42.720
And so embracing that chaos, if you will, is the first thing that you have to do.
00:34:46.020
So it's almost like, stop trying to look for balance.
00:34:49.140
Instead, focus on integration, like focus on merging everything and having everything
00:35:00.740
And then you got, you got your chest, you got your head, you got your brain, you got
00:35:03.580
your legs, your feet, everything serves a purpose and is all moving you in one direction.
00:35:08.500
So that's the analogy I like to use, if you will, that helps me because sometimes it does
00:35:12.820
feel, you know, sometimes one category needs more attention than the other.
00:35:17.660
And then once you, but when you put the effort into developing the systems in the beginning,
00:35:21.880
and this takes time, this takes a lot of effort.
00:35:23.920
And that's why in my coaching program, I work with people on this and it's crazy the
00:35:29.720
You know, Jay Abraham, the famous marketer, he always talks about this, optimize first,
00:35:36.680
So a lot of us are looking for breakthroughs, but what you first have to do is optimize everything
00:35:41.360
So when he goes into a company, he focuses on making all the systems that are currently
00:35:45.580
running, making them work better, eliminate whatever doesn't need to be there.
00:35:51.140
And so that, that way of thinking helps me a lot because I might need a breakthrough in
00:35:55.220
one area while I'm consistently optimizing another.
00:35:59.120
Like, for example, I feel, I feel really great about the, where my relationships are headed,
00:36:06.560
And then there's other areas of my life that need breakthroughs.
00:36:09.020
And so I can, while consistently optimizing these other areas, I can focus on innovation
00:36:13.180
and creating a breakthrough in another category.
00:36:17.160
And we talk a lot about what I refer to as congruency.
00:36:23.600
If you can find a way to be congruent between your work and your family life and your friendships
00:36:27.660
and the things that you do for activities, I think you're going to have a lot more success.
00:36:38.580
And I hope guys are taking notes because there's been so much information.
00:36:41.420
We could talk about this stuff all day, but for the sake of time, your time, my time,
00:36:44.220
and everybody else, I'm going to cut it short right here.
00:36:46.360
But if someone wants to connect with you a little bit more, actually, before I get to
00:36:50.960
that, I'll give you an opportunity to share that.
00:36:52.880
But I want to ask you a question I ask all of my guests, and that is, what does it mean
00:36:58.120
To be a man, in one word, means to be decisive.
00:37:02.520
A man's got to be able to make decisions and also to be able to learn from those decisions.
00:37:07.160
I feel like a lot of men, we overthink, we're indecisive, we're waiting for things to be
00:37:16.080
I read that in this really good book by Patrick Lencioni.
00:37:20.100
So decide on what it is that you want and know that it's going to look ugly sometimes.
00:37:27.720
He embraces the chaos, he embraces the chaos that's in the jungle, but he decides, he's
00:37:34.680
So all the men out there listening, make sure you focus on being decisive, make decisions,
00:37:41.260
Well, how do we connect with you, learn more about what you're doing, and see what you
00:37:51.380
You can go to imnotyou.com forward slash order of man.
00:37:56.340
But you can find me on Instagram, Twitter, all of that.
00:38:02.740
Also, you can email me, niyi.sobo at gmail.com.
00:38:07.640
I don't always respond, but I love hearing from you guys and hearing your feedback, et
00:38:14.120
I appreciate your energy and passion, enthusiasm for what you're doing.
00:38:16.780
I can see why you've made the transition to full time, and I can definitely see how you're
00:38:21.420
So I want to let you know I appreciate you and your time and coming on the show today.
00:38:29.060
Mr. Nii Shobo dropping some hard-earned knowledge on how to dominate in any environment.
00:38:33.960
We talked about a lot today, so make sure you go to orderofman.com slash 072 so you can
00:38:39.820
Also, remember our inaugural Order of Man Uprising, September 15th through the 18th, 2016.
00:38:46.780
We're bringing on new instructors and introducing them daily, and it's going to be an event unlike
00:38:51.740
any other, so go to orderofman.com slash uprising for all the details.
00:38:55.960
Guys, I look forward to talking to you on Friday, but until then, take action and live
00:39:00.560
Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast.
00:39:03.520
You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be?
00:39:07.200
We invite you to join the Order at orderofman.com.