Options Equal Freedom ｜ FRIDAY FIELD NOTES
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
158.5394
Summary
In this episode, I discuss the concept of discipline equating to freedom, and how to create more options in your life so that you can live the life that you desire. I also talk about the importance of networking, and why it's important to take advantage of networking opportunities.
Transcript
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If you're strapped for cash, if you're up to your eyeballs in debt, if you are at the behest or under the thumb of the medical industrial complex or big pharma or medication unnecessarily,
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if you don't have any money and so you have to work for this employer and because you work for this employer and have no money,
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they're asking you to do something immoral and you're not in a position to walk away, that's at odds with your sovereignty.
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By now, everybody listening to this has heard the term discipline equals freedom, which Jocko said probably, I don't know, five or ten years ago and maybe longer.
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Aristotle once said something close to 2,000 years ago that through discipline comes freedom.
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And I will say that I don't disagree with that.
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The whole concept of discipline equating to freedom means that what we sacrifice in the short term gives us greater opportunities and greater abundance and more of the life that we, I think most of us, choose to have.
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The question is whether or not it's discipline that is really the thing that creates freedom in your life.
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And I'm going to share some ideas not to be antithetical to that idea, but to round out the perspective that not only is it through discipline comes freedom,
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but I believe that it's through the options that we have, the options that we have to choose between what we do for work,
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the options that we have to choose who we decide to spend the rest of our life with,
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the options that we have to choose which ideologies and maybe even dogmas that we pursue that will hopefully lead us to the kind of lives that we want to have.
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So again, this is not antithetical to the concept of discipline equals freedom, but maybe gives us some new perspectives on what to look for.
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So today I'm going to share with you four things that you can do to create more options in your life
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and why having more options in your life ultimately gives you the freedom to choose, the freedom to pursue, and the freedom to live the life that you want.
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I've had a stepfather come into my life about the time I was 14, 15 years old.
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And although there were some not so great examples of what it means to be a man,
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I do remember him saying quite often that having more options gives you power and gives you control
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and gives you the ability to choose the life that you desire.
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He was very successful financially, and I really admired and respected a lot of what he did when it came to building business
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and building wealth and abundance and prosperity in his life.
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And quite honestly, I was the beneficiary or the recipient in some ways to some degree of the wealth and abundance he was able to create.
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Other things, not so stellar, not so great, but I can at least recognize and give credit where credit is due.
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What I would say as a first tactic or mindset for you when it comes to creating options in your life
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is to know that it is on your shoulders to fix yourself first.
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There are so many men that I talk with just about every day who think that only their life would be better if fill in the blank.
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My relationship would be better if my wife did this.
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My career pursuits would be better if only my boss did this.
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My financial prosperity would be better if only the economy was this way, or the president or Congress did this.
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And the problem with that is you're not giving yourself any sort of options.
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You're not giving yourself any sort of control in your life.
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What you're doing when you ask somebody else to be different in order for you to have a desired result
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is handing all of the power over to that external circumstance or that person.
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Now, that's not to say that there aren't factors at play that influence the outcomes of your life,
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but they are far less relevant than most men give them credit for.
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If you want to fix your relationship, sure, acknowledge what she might be able to do differently,
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but I am willing to bet that your relationship will improve in some degree the more that you're willing to invest in that relationship.
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Your career will get better if you stop saying that my boss is this or the task is this or the economy is that
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and decide I'm going to learn a new skill, I'm going to pick up a new skill set that will help me be more valuable to this organization.
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Or if this organization does not present me with the opportunity, then I'm going to look elsewhere,
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and I'm going to be marketable, and I'm going to have opportunities through networking.
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It's important, very important as the first step to realize that it is on your shoulders to fix your circumstances,
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And we are not going to relinquish our power and sovereignty to other people
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because we think other people have the key, the skeleton key to our life of success
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or our dreams and hopes and desires is on your shoulders.
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Do not pedestalize your employment or employer.
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Do not pedestalize the doctrine of your company or organization or country.
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Do not adhere strictly without thinking about it, rational thought process,
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some sort of dogma, ideology, religion, et cetera.
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Now, I will say that we are not going to, or at least we should not,
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sacrifice what I'm talking about here for the options that we have or even loyalty.
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I'm not telling you that you should be disloyal
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because I don't think it's antithetical or opposite to not pedestalizing anything
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to just be flippant and unfazed by the responsibilities that we have,
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the contractual obligations that we've made, the promises that we've committed to,
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So just because you might happen to be in a long-term marriage,
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you might say, well, Ryan's telling me I should have more options.
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or that I have made a covenant, for example, with God.
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That's something I hear quite often, and I should not do that.
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and don't become so rigid in your thought processes
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that you're not willing to explore new ideas and new concepts
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I think it is quite possible to be loyal to yourself,
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to be true to your word, to honor your commitments,
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and also still acknowledge that there's room for development
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and improvement and nuance and thoughts and ideas
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that you haven't considered before or haven't heard before.
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I'm not telling you that you should be loyal to your thing,
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but still explore the fringes of what is possible and new ideas.
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And there are values that are important, that come first.
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I'm not telling you that just because you happen to be a Christian
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but I'm saying explore the fringes that all of a sudden
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But are there other ways to make sure that we adhere to those commandments
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I'm not saying that because you happen to be in a 10 or a 15 or a 20 or a 40-year marriage
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that, hey, you should explore your other options
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and then forget your vows and disavow those things.
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But I am saying, are there different ways to learn how to love your wife better,
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to help her to live the kind of life that she wants?
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And that's what I mean when I say never pedestalize anything.
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that you're just not willing to explore other things.
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where you might not even question why or what you're doing,
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but you've just always heard that this is the way we do it
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and therefore you're blindly following something
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And the question is, for yourself, is this serving me?
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Is this moving me in the direction that I want to go?
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Number three, know the difference between coinciding and conflicting interests.
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platonic, personal, professional relationships in our lives.
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from the time that we're born to the time that we die.
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And we need to understand that some of the relationships that we enter into
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meaning that our goals and our dreams and our desires
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and we should pursue these professional and platonic
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But once those become conflicting relationships,
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that maybe this is not the best relationship for me.
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We don't want to become so locked into these things
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that we continue to just beat our heads against the wall, so to speak,
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or they're asking me to jeopardize my own morals and principles
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I see this quite often with men in relationships
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that they've had with friends for 20 and 30 and 40 years
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and the hobbies and activities that we're interested in.
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But I've also seen where you might have a friend for 20 years
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that is conducive to the dreams and hopes and desires that you have.
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And now all of a sudden you're in a conflicting relationship,
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I'm not telling you to sacrifice all of this stuff
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where you've been with a woman for a period of time,
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whether it's six months or six years or whatever,
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I would say that if you're in a committed relationship,
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that if you start to see conflicting interests,
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And the more that you are going to sacrifice yourself
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that maybe two parties aren't willing to work on it.
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especially in the relationships you want to keep,
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with keeping those in line with coinciding interests,
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in the way that I'm explaining it with liberty.
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or under the thumb of the medical industrial complex