Order of Man - Strategies for Success, Creating a Culture of Integrity, and Maximizing Personal Branding ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.

00:00:06.020 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.

00:00:10.480 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong.

00:00:15.500 This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become.

00:00:19.760 At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.

00:00:25.000 Kip, what's going on, man? Glad to be back for another Ask Me Anything.

00:00:27.140 It's good, man. I need my AMA fix, as always.

00:00:33.400 Are you a little under the weather?

00:00:35.760 I am. I think it's just allergies, though.

00:00:37.820 Yeah, I can hear it. I've got it, too.

00:00:41.020 That's what we deal with, right?

00:00:44.740 My beard's not thick enough to block out the pollen.

00:00:50.000 Well, apparently neither is mine, either.

00:00:51.720 I mean, I thought I'd have myself covered, but apparently that's not the case.

00:00:55.080 I guess I'll just keep growing it.

00:00:56.140 Yeah, you're trimming back the mustache area too much, so too much is getting through too good enough.

00:01:01.980 I actually don't trim my mustache at all.

00:01:04.340 You don't at all?

00:01:05.480 Not at all.

00:01:06.260 Most guys with a beard, I've noticed, they do trim their mustache. I don't trim it at all. It's just, it's all natural, baby.

00:01:12.760 Just comb it off to the sides?

00:01:14.380 Yeah, just train it out of my face and mouth a little bit.

00:01:17.480 I've had to relearn to eat as I've grown my beard over the past five years, too.

00:01:21.100 There's certain foods I just won't eat in public.

00:01:22.720 Yeah. Well, you're going to have a copyright in the whole beard thing. As I'm growing mine a little bit more, everyone's like, well, is that a Mickler beard? I'm like, screw you. It's a kip beard. 1.00

00:01:32.840 It's a man's beard. I mean, the beards were around long. That's the funny thing I hear a lot about. Oh, beards are just, it's just a trend. I'm like, dude, men have been growing beards since the dawn of man. If anything, shaving is a trend, not growing a beard.

00:01:46.000 Yeah. A trend of mankind.

00:01:48.760 That's right, man. That's right. Well, guys, what we're doing here is we're answering your questions specifically from our exclusive brotherhood, the Iron Council. We've got, I think, 480, 490, somewhere right in there. I haven't looked in the last little bit.

00:02:02.900 There's men who are all banded together, working together. This month, we're talking about the wild man. We've got some challenges going on within the Iron Council. We're doing some very cool stuff there.

00:02:12.560 But specifically, we're fielding questions from those gentlemen. And then also, we are going to be fielding some questions from our Facebook group as well. So, let's just get right into it, man.

00:02:25.420 Yeah, sounds great. So, we'll do the Iron Council, guys. To learn more about the Iron Council, guys, and how to participate in that group, and we'll probably talk about it naturally. We'll talk about it throughout this podcast.

00:02:36.540 But to learn more, go to orderofofman.com forward slash Iron Council. So, our first question, really just Bubba Downs asking for an update. And we're getting a lot of noise around this, a lot of chatter around this supposal main event.

00:02:53.060 Yeah, man. So, we're moving. Let's see. I'm just trying to think about when this podcast will be released tomorrow. So, what is that? The 15th?

00:03:00.540 Yeah. So, we'll be leaving as of the release of this podcast in about a week and a half. We're leaving the weekend of the 24th from our home here in Utah to Maine.

00:03:11.960 It'll take us about a week to get out there because we're going to visit some family and drag our feet a little bit, if you will. That's a whole other conversation.

00:03:18.480 And then once we get up there, give us a few months. But it's looking like the end of July that we're going to be doing a meetup slash event slash experience slash housewarming order of man headquarters party.

00:03:38.960 I don't know. I don't know what to call it. But we're going to have a great time. We're going to put you to work. We're going to be challenged a little bit.

00:03:43.900 We're going to have some workshops. I'm working on getting some surprise guests out there to visit with you guys. And it'll be a pretty cool thing.

00:03:51.240 So, stay tuned for that because that'll be the end of July. I think the tentative dates are – I don't even know if I want to tell you guys. I'll tell you.

00:04:01.360 The 26th through the 28th of July. So, pencil that into your calendar. We're only going to have probably 200 spots and it'll go very, very quickly.

00:04:11.660 Okay. And we're thinking Iron Council exclusive or kind of an order of man slash Iron Council?

00:04:19.640 No. So, one day – so, the way that'll work is we'll do the evening before the Thursday. I think that's the 25th. We'll probably be an exclusive Iron Council.

00:04:27.580 Maybe that might be leadership. And then the next day will be Iron Council. And then the following day and a half will be Order of Man is probably how that'll run.

00:04:35.060 But we'll get you all the details. But that's what we're looking at right now.

00:04:38.200 Cool.

00:04:38.780 Yeah.

00:04:39.660 Love it.

00:04:40.060 Love it. There you go.

00:04:40.960 All right. Pramit Ball, who would you consider your biggest competition when it comes to podcasts and the Iron Council Mastermind Group?

00:04:50.140 I inspired last week when I went rucking and I met someone from the Good Dad Project who knew all about the Order of Man and had great things to say.

00:04:58.300 Cool. Yeah. I don't know. I don't really look at it as competition. I mean, for example, Larry with the Good Dad Project, he's a good friend of mine.

00:05:06.440 We jump on calls once a month or maybe even a little bit more frequently and talk about common struggles and things like that we're going through.

00:05:13.780 I don't really think there's a whole lot of scarcity in what I'm doing or what he's doing or what anybody else may be doing.

00:05:20.860 I do think there's a lot of organizations out there that are similar. But from my experience, they're driven from a place of ego and arrogance and excessive pride.

00:05:32.420 And I don't think that doesn't resonate with me. I don't think it's good for men. I think we tend to fall into that trap as it is.

00:05:38.820 So to play into that is not necessarily a good thing. And then I think there's a lot of organizations, frankly, that are struggling to keep up.

00:05:45.700 I mean, we're so innovative. We're doing so many different things. Like within the Iron Council, for example, we're about to release rank advancements and achievements that guys will be able to unlock and earn.

00:05:56.920 So we're constantly adding things to what we're doing and offering courses and doing meetups and having varying degrees of conversations.

00:06:06.040 Like I think most people are just struggling to keep up and we'll continue to innovate and continue to change and continue to reach the masses and continue to grow and continue to reclaim and restore masculinity, which is ultimately our objective.

00:06:19.500 So, yeah, I don't know. I don't, I don't, I don't focus a whole lot on like, oh, these guys are my, my competition and I need to do it differently than they do. And I need to steal their market share. I really haven't thought much about that at all.

00:06:32.000 Ryan, if you don't mind, I mean, cause I think this is such a, the scarcity mentality, right? Versus abundance is, is such a critical thing from a business perspective.

00:06:41.320 Do you mind sharing kind of like, you know, why, why don't you have that mentality? What, why have the mentality of, Hey, I'm not too worried about what my competition is doing. Can you, can you share some insight there?

00:06:53.820 Well, I don't really want to do it like everybody else. Number one. And if I'm so focused on what other people are doing, then I may fall into the trap of duplicating and replicating what they've already created.

00:07:03.760 Now there's certainly validity to it because they may have proven a model that works, but I'm, I'm not interested in that. I'd rather innovate and create something entirely new. And if I'm using what other people are doing as a model for what I'm doing, then I'm not really going to be innovative and creative and flex that creative muscle.

00:07:22.800 Uh, the other side of it is that I don't want to focus on what they're doing. I want to focus on serving the men I'm trying to serve through this podcast, through the iron council, through the courses we run through the events and the experiences that we have. And if I'm looking backwards or sideways, it was somebody else is doing that. I can't focus on how can I continue to elevate the experience for the men that I'm working to serve and their families and their businesses and employees and communities and everybody else there, they're out to serve. I think it's a very stagnant way of looking at things.

00:07:51.840 Now, do I have my pulse on what people are doing? Yeah. You better believe that, but I don't get so consumed with it that I lose focus or misplace my attention on something that really shouldn't be getting a whole lot of my attention.

00:08:05.820 Uh, and, and I'm only, I'm only able to, uh, leverage my own activities to, to a certain degree. And I'm just not willing to invest it in places that aren't going to produce or yield a result for me or return. It seems a little asinine to me.

00:08:21.840 Well, and what I love about, about the iron council in this podcast, Ryan, and working with you over the last few years actually is it's not, I don't know. Our focus is how to be effective, right? How to help the men within the iron council become better men. Like that is literally the focus. It's not like grow. Well, don't get me wrong. It, we want it to grow, but that's the result of our focus, right? That's the byproduct of doing what we feel is correct.

00:08:49.840 Correct. And effective and best for the men within the IC. And so I love that aspect versus us just trying to like, okay, how do we market this? How do we market? It's like, no, guess how you market it? You, you do a damn good job. Right. And you, and we try to provide a superior service for the guys. And, and that's the byproduct of, of us taking those actions.

00:09:09.520 Well, I think this actually ties really well into our philosophy, not just within the order and the iron council, but personally, my life's philosophy, which is one of my life philosophies, I should say, or a tenant of my philosophy, which is that we, we work backwards.

00:09:24.520 Backwards into what we should be doing to produce the desired objective. So we're going to create our objectives or think about what it is that we want. Very specifically, I want to accomplish blank or X, Y, and Z.

00:09:35.300 And then you work backwards into it down to the tactics that you can complete on a daily basis that will inevitably yield the result that you're after.

00:09:46.920 So once you have the objective, then work backwards, stop focusing on the objective and start focusing more on how to get there. I think that's, what's missing most in men's lives. Like I haven't met a man who didn't have some sort of aspirational goal for the future. And that's all relative. I understand some, some are here and some are there, but everybody's got ambitions. Everybody's got goals and dreams and things they want.

00:10:08.320 But I think it's significantly easier to find a man who hasn't really put a plan into place in order to achieve that. So that's what we're talking about here with our growth in the order of man. And what we're trying to accomplish is, okay, here's our objectives. Now let's work backwards and let's just focus on the activity. And we know that the results will inevitably take care of themselves.

00:10:28.080 Yeah. Yeah. And, and, and your last Friday field notes was a perfect subject on this last Friday field notes. I'm looking it up right now to see what it was labeled. Do you recall what it's labeled there, Ryan?

00:10:40.480 Um, they're all kind of blending together at this point. Yes. Make yourself, make yourself dangerous. That's right. Yeah. You talk about this and, and, and it's very, I mean, it's really around the same subject, right? Of, uh, being really intentional at defining specifically what it is that you want, right?

00:10:57.740 And coming up with those tactics to reach it. So, yeah, yeah, that's exactly right. And, and that's also our, our battle plan process, which is in, in the book. And of course we, we discussed that in the IC as well, the iron council.

00:11:08.880 Yeah. All right. Next question. Hunter Locke, uh, team echo, uh, their, their XO. He says, what's up folks? I'd like to know what's the most rewarding and impactful experience you can give a child before age 18 must narrow to only one.

00:11:25.220 Um, I I'm trying to be specific here, but I would just say creating a rite of passage. And I, and I can't really tell you what specifically that would look like. You're going to have to create that for yourself.

00:11:37.020 But I think if you can create a rite of passage for your child, then that's going to be the most rewarding, the most fulfilling, the most effective, frankly, for them and also for you. So go back and listen to Friday field notes. As I talk about the rite of passages that I implement with my kids. Uh, but I, but I definitely think that's, that's the most rewarding experience.

00:11:56.020 What is in that example, Ryan, because I'm, I'm trying to answer that for myself in my mind here is what is the mindset that you would want them to have coming out of that, that rite of passage?

00:12:13.640 Self-reliance. That's it. I mean, your job as a father is to put yourself out of work. That is, that is your ultimate job.

00:12:20.880 So if your kids constantly need you for every little thing to achieve any measure of success in their life, then you're doing them a huge disservice.

00:12:31.300 Your job from the time that they're born to the time they leave the nest is to make themselves capable of handling whatever life has to throw at them and not being able necessarily to, to overcome immediately or on the first try, every obstacle that are going to run into, but equipping them with the mindset and the skillset and the knowledge and the tools

00:12:50.380 that they need to learn how to deal with life themselves. So all of our, I, we do a rite of passage from the time my kids turn eight until the time they turn 18.

00:13:00.340 So every two years, eight, 10, 12, 14, 16, and 18. Uh, and, and each one is designed to build on the last, to give them more self-reliance and ultimately have them leave the nest in a place where they're somewhat confident in their abilities to,

00:13:16.660 to succeed and thrive and figure things out as they come up.

00:13:20.720 Yeah. Love it. All right. Nicholas Bean, what are the top three actions you can take today on a daily basis to improve your life?

00:13:31.040 So this is an interesting question. I saw this one, or I think we talked about it. It's, it's interesting because it's so different for everybody. You know, what I need to accomplish on a daily basis is different than what you need to accomplish, Kip,

00:13:40.860 because a couple of things we have different objectives, number one, and we also have different strengths and weaknesses. So my strength, for example, and I, and I don't think this applies necessarily is I'm very disciplined about going in and getting my, my, my training in for the day.

00:13:56.160 You on the other hand may struggle with that. I'm not saying you specifically, but somebody listening might struggle with that. So what's the one thing they can do on a daily basis to ensure success, to do that thing that they're struggling with, right? If my, if the thing that I struggle with, for example, is, uh, turning, turning the phone off and communicating with my children, then that's the one thing that I need to do on a daily basis, maybe more so than somebody else.

00:14:23.160 So I can't answer that question objectively. It's a very subjective answer. It's a very subjective thing. So what I would suggest is that, and we're beating a dead horse here, but it's so important is that you do your battle plan and you come up with an objective, a 90 day objective in each one of the four quadrants that we discuss.

00:14:43.120 So it's calibration, so it's calibration, which is a mental, emotional, and spiritual health. It's connection, which is your relationship with other people. It's condition, which is physical health. And then it's a contribution, which is becoming a man of value, how you add more value to your surroundings and, and environment.

00:15:00.840 So you have an objective in each one of those, and then work yourself backwards into one tactic that you can complete on a daily basis that will inevitably produce again, the result that you're after. So if my condition, or excuse me, I'll say my calibration objective, it again, it's mental, emotional, and spiritual health is to last quarter.

00:15:23.600 It was to complete two hunts, successful hunts. My tactic was to practice archery for 30 minutes every single day. My condition objective was to get to 15% body fat. So my tactic was no processed sugars at all.

00:15:46.500 So you can see, I give myself literally four things I need to do every single day. And those are the things that I need to focus on to produce success. This is why we're doing inside of the iron council right now. We've got a hundred percent challenge right now, which means because everybody in the iron council does this and goes through this process. We walk them through this process for themselves is they come up with their objectives.

00:16:09.820 They get their, their checkpoints along their way, along the way, and they work down into tactics. And then the a hundred percent challenge is that for the next seven days that you do your four tactics every day for the next seven days. So you need to get 28, 28 activities over the next seven days. If you do that, then you complete the challenge. Like these are the types of things that we have, the systems and the frameworks in place for inside of that, inside of that brotherhood, the iron council to be able to achieve the kind of things.

00:16:39.820 That we're talking about right now. Yeah. And if you don't mind me getting on the soapbox a little bit, a hundred percent challenge requires us to be unreasonable. Like we have, it is so easy, right? For most guys in the IC and even outside of the iron council, especially probably outside of the iron council to have excuses, right? Excuses why they shouldn't work out today. Well, I got really bad allergies. I got a cold or, you know what I mean? Work was really long.

00:17:07.500 And we have all these reasons and excuses that we come up with of why not to be a hundred percent at what we're doing and what we've committed to do. And so this is, this is us in Ryan really just driving this home that like, guys do a hundred percent, be unreasonable, do everything that you said you do without reason, without excuse.

00:17:30.400 Well, I'll give you a great example of this Kip is we had one of the team leaders. So I posed this, this challenge in the iron council. And we had one of our team leaders say something like he's, his team has a meetup this weekend. So he'll do it next week. I said, no, no, no, no, no. That's not how this works because there's never a perfect time. Like you don't get to pick and choose when you're going to be good. 0.95

00:17:52.520 And I said, tell your team that this is the hundred percent challenge it's this week and build in some contingencies into your process so that you guys can get your hundred percent challenge done. A great example would be archery. If my, my objective again was to complete two successful hunts, practice archery 30 minutes a day. Well, there was times where I was traveling. Does that mean I can't practice archery?

00:18:18.460 No, because I actually have a little archery trainer that, that works on your release and your, and your grip and your form. I can practice that in the airport. So I building contingencies, knowing that I've got these things coming up. Don't give yourself excuses, give yourself solutions. That's what men do. Boys create excuses like, Oh, we can't do it. Cause we've got this thing. Okay. That's legitimate. Nothing wrong with that. I think that's a great thing that you guys are meeting up together, but don't forsake your responsibilities or think that you're not going to do it.

00:18:48.460 You're giving yourself an excuse to get out of it because you've got this thing. Just build in some contingencies and make it work regardless. Yeah. One of the things that when I was a battle team leader, um, over echo, one of the things that I would ask guys sometimes is, is they would, they would communicate. What's a, they missed a couple of tactics for the given week because of some scenario. My question to them would be.

00:19:12.640 If you would have done the tactic anyway, regardless of the circumstance, would you have been better off?

00:19:22.560 Like sometimes we don't do things because they're like, Oh, well, you know what? I have this really big family problem of a lot. I had to take care of it. And then my question is, regardless of that problem, if you would have went for your five mile run, would you have been better off? And the answer is always yes. Right. These guys having a meetup.

00:19:40.640 And they're like, Hey, we got this event going on. So we don't want to disrupt whatever. Would that event be better? If you all woke up in the morning and got in your daily workout? Right.

00:19:50.400 The answer would be yes. It's always yes. It's always yes. So it's, there's never like, there's never a valid excuse when, when we're on the court and we're doing what we said we would do. And we're doing the things AKA that makes us better men. Guess what happens? You're a better man. Right. The day goes better. Right. It never works the other way, guys. Never.

00:20:13.740 And all your, all of your challenges that you're running up against. And I get that you are, but all of the challenges that you're running up against are going to, to work themselves out quicker, more effectively, more efficiently, because you're doing the things that you need to be doing, not forsaking those things because you happen to have these things come up.

00:20:33.740 Totally. And it's fun, right? Like I remember when I was training for a marathon, um, I ended up having a trip to Disneyland with the family and I was in the middle of my marathon training regimen. Guess what I had to do? I had to wake up really early in the morning and had to run all over Anaheim, California to get my run in.

00:20:52.800 Right. Do you think I, my day went well? Hell yeah, it did. It was awesome. Right. It was great. And my kids got to see me going, geez, he's being unreasonable. Right. He's committed to doing what he said he would do. Even the fact that we're on vacation. That's inspiring. That's beneficial to other people and yourself.

00:21:10.680 A hundred percent. All right. Next question. Jim Barna, how would you address a guy at your CrossFit gym that is consistently cuts reps and posts the best times almost every day? The gym owner and head coach asked my opinion as an assistant coach. And I was torn between number one, ignoring it because it doesn't affect anyone else. And number two, recommending he simply call the guy out privately and have a talk with him.

00:21:35.860 Well, number one, if you're a coach, it's your responsibility. That's what he's paying you to do. Number two, it does affect other people because if there's a lack of integrity that you notice, guess who else notices it? Everybody else in the gym. And they think less of you and they think less of the gym and the standard goes down. So don't tell me there isn't a cost to this one dude who's skipping reps. There's a cost and it's impacting the quality of the gym.

00:22:04.380 So the answer is you have a tactful conversation with the gentleman and let him know how the standard is to be met in this gym. And if he can meet that standard, he can continue to be a member. If he can't meet that standard, he can no longer be a member of the gym because he's a liar and it's impacting what everybody else is trying to create there.

00:22:24.320 Yeah. And would you say that's the case because the CrossFit gym is very much like team oriented, right? It's if people are working together and numbers are being tracked versus if it was just, I don't know, loosely, like not so much team oriented.

00:22:38.480 I don't know if it's team. I wouldn't say team oriented as much as I would say competitive oriented and culture oriented. CrossFit is about a culture. And if the culture is shit and if the culture is out of integrity and you allow these types of things that seem insignificant, then that's what everybody else will treat it as.

00:22:59.800 Everybody else is going to treat it as a joke. Everybody else is going to cheat their reps because they're like, well, this dude, I know I beat him and he was cheating. So I'm going to cheat. 0.99

00:23:08.460 So what you're doing is you're actually encouraging more people to cheat because you're allowing one other dude to cheat himself and the rest of the crew there.

00:23:16.880 Yeah. So let's, let's, let's use this as an analogy, right? Is what other areas is this same concept applicable to for, for him or for not, or what, like what? No environments, right? Work environment.

00:23:32.540 Oh, everywhere. Work, family, team, jujitsu, extracurricular activities, whatever environment that you're showing up as you're either enhancing the environment or detracting from it. There's no neutral. When you put yourself into an environment, you are acting upon that environment just by showing up.

00:23:51.760 So if you're just sitting in the corner, twiddling your thumbs, when you should be engaged, you might think, oh, I'm just a innocent bystander. No, man, there's no innocent bystanding in life. You're impacting that. So figure out how you're impacting the environment and how other people are impacting the environment. And look, if it were me and I was just, I was not an assistant coach like, like this guy is, I was just a member.

00:24:15.680 I would feel obligated to tell the, the owner or the coach, Hey man, this guy's cheating reps. And it's really like bringing everybody else is upset about this is bringing everybody else down. Like you have a responsibility, wherever you are in the hierarchy, you have a responsibility to, to maintain and edify the culture. If you're going to be there, then that's what you should be doing. Otherwise just don't be there. Go somewhere else.

00:24:38.820 Yeah. I love it. It's, um, it reminds me, um, as a battle team leader, we used to do this in the iron council, right? We, we have the ability to have an up at night and an up at night could be anything that you lose in sleep over, but it's also to call out another individual on the team. Right. On their, on their BS. Right. So if a guy's coming to the call and he's saying, oh, I didn't get this done because of this, or he's running some story that lacks integrity and ownership, then any team member has

00:25:08.580 the right to say, you know what, guess what? I disagree. And this is why. And I think you need to look at it this way. That's what high effectiveness or highly, I don't know, effective teams looks, looks like, right?

00:25:22.100 Well, you know, what's going to happen in that situation. You're going to have one of two things happen and both are wins. You're going to have the guy step up and say, oh yeah, he's right. I am slacking off. I can be better at this. That's a win. Or you're going to have a guy say, this is bullshit.

00:25:38.780 I'm out of here. And you're going to lose somebody who probably shouldn't have been there anyways, or isn't qualified to be there amongst you who are trying to lift yourselves up. Both are wins. 0.98

00:25:49.380 Yeah. And I, man, I just can't help but think of all the different business scenarios, right? Team member that's missing calls, constantly taking time off, not properly communicating to the team, not pulling his weight. Like these are all these scenarios in a business culture that I think far too often leaders have an intensity or managers have a tendency to kind of overlook because those are uncomfortable conversations.

00:26:15.580 Well, and I would actually go further in that. It's not only because they're uncomfortable, but in a lot of cases, the high producers think they can get away with some shit. 0.99

00:26:25.420 Yeah. And so the, the boss or the team leader will overlook bad behavior because he's a high producer. 0.98

00:26:34.360 Yeah. So they'll say, well, he, he produces so he can do this. Well, yeah, he might be producing, but what is he taking away?

00:26:41.360 Yeah. What is he consuming in the environment? But because he's being an asshole and not being a team player and doing his own thing. So yeah, he might be bringing in the bucks, but at what cost?

00:26:55.800 Yeah. Are you going to lose great team members? Are people going to underperform? Are your other people with potential not going to step into their potential?

00:27:04.260 Because they see this guy at the quote unquote top of the chain that you put them there, isn't producing to the level that even he's capable of. There's a cost of success. There's a cost of everything. You just need to make sure that the cost doesn't outweigh the benefits.

00:27:20.440 Yeah. All right. Next question. Aaron gets question for both Ryan and Kip. What is, what is the last book you started reading, but how to stop because it was so bad or did not add enough value?

00:27:32.800 Um, I don't know. I don't know what it is. I guess that's probably what the reason I put it down. It wasn't very memorable. Um, that's a good point.

00:27:43.900 Like if, if, if I would have remembered it or wanted to continue to read it, I think I'd have a better time remembering what the title would be. So I don't know. I don't have any problem though. Putting a book down. I, there's way too many good books out there to feel obligated to finish a crappy one. So, oh, you know what? I know one. Um, it's, uh,

00:28:02.800 The Subtle Art of Not Giving an F I think is what it's called. Dude, I tried, that book is so popular and I tried to read it. I couldn't even get past the first, the first chapter. Like the language.

00:28:16.620 Really?

00:28:16.680 It was so distracting and just, just not necessary.

00:28:21.580 Oh, I, the language is extremely bolder.

00:28:24.540 Yeah. It was like, and it wasn't even relevant. Like I don't, like an F word.

00:28:28.600 Like it took away from the message.

00:28:29.580 Right. An F word doesn't bother me here and there, you know, but it's like every sentence, I can't even, I can't even hear the message because I'm so distracted by the delivery of it. It was horrible.

00:28:41.520 Interesting. Yeah. Interesting. And I know a lot of guys, yeah, it's a really, really popular book. And you know what? Like, I think the guy's got a great message to share, but I don't know. I think, I think he's kind of, it actually bothers me with a lot of the titles of books these days is like the Subtle Art of Not Giving an F and just swear words in the title. It's like, I don't understand why. I mean, I get it. Like it's, it's, it's clickbait, right? It's, it's designed to catch your attention.

00:29:10.920 Yeah. And play the tough guy game, but it's like, it's unnecessary.

00:29:14.020 Yeah, because it's clickbait, I ignore it, right? Cause I immediately go, eh, that's not my kind of book. When in reality, it probably could be a good book, but it, because it's kind of clickbait, I, I, by default ignore it.

00:29:25.380 Right. Right. This is why I have a hard time sometimes with like Gary V too. I think he's got a great message, but the way he delivers it is so distracting for me that I can't, I can't hear it. You know, I'd love to hear it, but I can't because.

00:29:40.100 Yeah.

00:29:40.800 Their, their words are distracting rather than enhancing the overall message. So there you go. That's the book.

00:29:49.020 I don't have a book where I'm like, I don't know. The only one that comes to mind is boundaries. I can't remember the author. The content is good. It just wasn't, wasn't drawing me in. So I wouldn't say I wouldn't pick it back up, but it didn't finish it. You know what I mean? I probably got a couple, a few chapters in and then I was kind of like, eh, I'll read it later.

00:30:09.600 Yeah.

00:30:09.960 You know what I mean?

00:30:10.600 Yeah.

00:30:10.780 So, um, but I, I'm sure there's still a great message there. It's just, and I've heard great things about that book as well. I just, um, that just wasn't drawing me in.

00:30:19.640 Yeah.

00:30:19.880 So I think the better question is what books do you focus on rather than which one did you put down? You know, just,

00:30:24.860 yeah.

00:30:25.080 I mean, just if, if a book doesn't resonate with you, put it down. If a book does resonate with you, finish it.

00:30:31.120 Yeah. Copy that. All right. Another question. Anthony Miller. Uh, this, these guys are funny.

00:30:38.120 This is for slash the side Kip Sorensen. Uh, how, how has being a team leader in the iron council added value to your life and growth as a leader and as a man, maybe Ryan can chime in as well.

00:30:52.960 Um, yeah. So one of the things, one of the things that come off, off the top of my head, when I think about this is what high happens in the iron council will show up in life.

00:31:05.100 And because of that, it ends up being a great learning, um, environment from a, from a leadership perspective. There hasn't been a single thing that has happened in the IC that didn't eventually, or hasn't already shown up in life.

00:31:22.180 And so leadership lessons that I learned as a battle team leader, I just immediately turned around and thought, Oh, okay, I'm going to apply the same concept to my team at work.

00:31:32.160 Oh, here's a dichotomy of leadership that I didn't see. Right? Like it was perfect timing. We, for, let me share a quick example.

00:31:40.520 Um, we are, we're going over Jocko's book, dichotomy of leadership one particular month.

00:31:46.320 And on my team, my, at the time, and you remember this, Ryan, we talked about this. My team was kind of struggling and, and I was holding on to particular team members.

00:31:58.500 I was trying to, how do I say this? Try to save the team member, right? And progress them forward. And then we're reading this book and all of a sudden, like the clouds open and the sign, the sun shined through.

00:32:11.460 And all of a sudden there was right in front of my face was mission first, right? Don't lose sight of the mission over the team. And I, and I came to the realization.

00:32:22.680 I'm like, Oh my gosh, that's like exactly what I'm doing is I'm losing, losing focus of our mission as a team are the mission of the iron council. And I'm letting my personal relationship with team members trump that.

00:32:37.900 Hmm. And that was one of the dichotomies of leadership that Jocko talks about in his book. And so I made, I course corrected, I pivoted, made some adjustments on the team. And then what did I do? Make sure I don't make that mistake at work.

00:32:50.240 Right. Right. And do the same thing at work. And, and it's a tendency, right? That's why these are dichotomies, right? It's because there's this natural tendency to like, want to save the team member to put the team member before the mission.

00:33:02.900 And I have to remember same thing at work. And it kind of goes back to the example earlier about, um, you know, the CrossFit gym, right? Them not going after and clear, having, uh, clear, uh, clearing up that scenario with that team member is putting that team member before the gym, right?

00:33:20.580 Before, before the mission of the gym. And we have a tendency to do that sometimes. And so that's one of the things that, that has completely helped me grow in, in my work that I experienced through just being a team leader within the IC.

00:33:34.560 Did that guy many examples, did that guy stick around or did he leave the iron council?

00:33:38.840 He stuck around. He totally stuck around and he got better or what he got better. Yes. He totally stepped up. So I was just being a crutch for him.

00:33:47.700 But to your point as well is, is if he walked away, that's okay too. Right. Because he wasn't ready and the team needed something different. Right. Right. And so I was content either way, as long as I stayed focused on the mission. Yeah.

00:34:02.200 No, it's a, it's a great point. And, and to your, your reference earlier about the CrossFit gym, you're saying place, place him before the team, but you know, it's actually happening.

00:34:12.060 You're not placing that individual before the team. What you're doing is you're placing yourself before the team because you lack the testicular fortitude to have a real conversation with a person that needs to have a conversation with.

00:34:25.980 Yeah. It doesn't have anything to do. You're not helping that person by letting them be frankly, bitch out on reps or not be a productive member of the iron council. You're actually hindering them. 0.74

00:34:39.640 And the only reason you're hindering them is because you lack the spine to be able to have a real conversation about a real issue. So don't put yourself before the team. It's not about other people. It's about your feelings and your inability to have a difficult conversation with somebody.

00:34:57.140 And I do. And I'd like to add, Ryan, I do think some guys might say, well, you know, it wasn't because of the uncomfortable conversation is because I really care. Well, then also, you would say that.

00:35:06.760 Yeah, exactly. Or what's also at play, I think is it's a, it's a self-esteem thing, right? If I don't say this guy, right, then that's going to look bad on me. And you know what I mean? Like, and which, which is once again about you and not necessarily about them either. Right.

00:35:23.060 Well, what, what, what is, what does it mean to save? Yeah. Right. Is, is enabling saving? Hell no. You might rescue them in that experience, but you're certainly not saving them over the long haul. And there might be moments where you need to swoop in and rescue somebody in a dangerous situation where they're a threat to themselves or somebody else.

00:35:46.180 But look at it on the long haul. You know, I've had countless conversations with guys in iron council. I had one just the other day. He's like, Hey man, I've been in for three months and I just noticed, um, my card got hit with a membership investment again. And can I get a refund? Cause I just didn't do it. I said, no, we don't offer refunds, but why don't you actually give it a real shot this time?

00:36:08.840 Like, why don't you take the next 90 days? Instead of thinking that you're going to pay a couple hundred bucks, like actually do something to improve your life.

00:36:19.060 Yeah. And he emailed me back and he's like, he said, Hey man, I really appreciate the kick in the pants. I'm going to try again. Where do I start over?

00:36:29.320 So rescuing them. Yeah. I could, would I have refunded him the 180 or whatever it is for the quarter? Yeah, man. I would, I don't care about 180 bucks. Like if he's going to push the issue, I'm going to refund that.

00:36:38.840 180, but instead I want to challenge him because that's why he joined in the first place. So let's double down. Let's not retreat. Let's double down and actually do something.

00:36:49.880 And look, if you honestly and legitimately put in the effort for the next 90 days and it isn't your cup of tea. All right, man, let's have that conversation then, but don't bail without even trying it.

00:37:00.000 That we, that we, as men need to hold each other more accountable and push a little hurt harder than maybe we normally would for fear of insulting that individual or hurting their feel bads or hurting our own little fragile egos as well.

00:37:15.500 Yeah. All right, Richard, uh, what are you doing when you feel overwhelmed with daily tasks to make progress? I have to do these things. Wake up early, read, write a journal, daily after action review, weekly after action review, train in the gym, train jujitsu, count calories, count spending, make a daily budget, spend time with my fiance, develop business and learn English.

00:37:42.500 English. This is not the complete list. And I know all the guys here are doing the same things. If I don't do all of this, I feel weak. But if I do all of these things, what I think I should do to improve myself, I feel beaten and burned out.

00:37:57.400 Man, I think he's fallen into a little bit of like, well, look at what Kip's doing. Look what Ryan's doing. Look at Andy Frisilla is doing. Look at what Goggins is doing. Look at what Jocko is doing. I'm supposed to do these. I have to, I'm supposed to.

00:38:10.280 Yeah. Yeah. It's like, you don't have to do all that stuff. Who's, who's telling you you have to do that stuff. Maybe you feel weak because you believe that you have to do what everybody else is doing. Look, there's elements. Should you work out or move your body every day? Sure. Maybe you don't have to get up early and do that. Maybe midday lunch works best for you. Like, I know you, you train jujitsu in the middle of the day, don't you?

00:38:31.420 Yeah. Right. So like that wouldn't work for me. So are you doing it wrong? No. Am I? No. Just means it doesn't work for me. So find a pattern, find a schedule, find a list of things that you need to do on a daily basis or weekly basis that works for you.

00:38:50.220 Cause if you do it and you get burnt out, it's, it's not going to work. You're, you're just going to have animosity and resentment and you're going to be bitter. And then you're going to be guilty because you didn't do what you were quote unquote supposed to do because somebody told you, you should along the way.

00:39:05.820 Find something that works for you. Experiment, take, take something out like this week, take something out. Just one thing and just see how you feel. Then maybe put it back in the next week and try something new and experiment and figure out a pattern and a process that works for you. You don't have to wake up at four 30. Cause Jocko says to wake up at four 30. And if he's listening to this podcast, he might disagree, but I think deep down, he's just saying, push yourself.

00:39:33.160 And if waking up at four 30 is that, that means pushing yourself. Great. If it's something else, great, but push yourself.

00:39:41.640 Yeah. We see this with, with, within the IC, right. New guys, right. They'll come on board. They're all hyped up and, and excited. Right. And they, they build out their battle plans and they're, they're going one, two, three tactics per quadrant.

00:39:57.300 Right. You know what I mean? Like, they're like, I'm changing my world. And it's like two weeks later, it's like.

00:40:02.740 They're dead, dude. They're exhausted. They're just can't do it.

00:40:06.100 Yeah. We ease into that stuff. You know, you don't, you don't have to do everything. You don't have to do it all. You can't, you can't do it all. So pick some things that work for you. Look, there's hobbies I picked up where I'm like, you know, that was a good intention. I think it would be good for me, but there's not going to do that. Cause I don't have the time or the inclination to do it. And I don't feel bad about it. I don't feel like a quitter. I don't feel like I'm giving up. I just feel like it didn't work for me. And that's okay. It's completely okay.

00:40:31.900 Or double down on one and kill it and, and tackle it and make it part of who you are and, and a habit and then grab one of these other items. You're right. Right. Yep. All right. Joshua Laycock. One of the major variables my wife and I are, are thinking about before making a major move in the next few years is the impact it will may or it will or may have on our kids. One in four. 0.86

00:40:56.900 We know kids are resilient and it isn't holding us back per se, but I'd love to hear what type of strategies and or planning you're looking to implement to assist your kids with such a, such a major transition like the one you're about to make.

00:41:11.040 I mean, I don't think they have any harder time than we're having and it'll be fine. You know, if anything, I look at it and think we're going to be in this together. We're going to bond because we're all that we have. We're going to get them involved in competitive sports and extracurricular activities during the summer. So that when they hit the school year, they'll be, they'll have friends and people they know.

00:41:30.080 Um, I plan on doing a lot of networking. I plan on having people over to our place because I want to, I want to meet people and I want to meet their families and I want my kids to be able to meet their families. We've got a great church organization, uh, who, in fact, the church there has already reached out to us unsolicited.

00:41:47.180 Really? Yeah. Reached out to my wife and introduced, it was the, uh, the primary president. The primary is the, the young kids in the, in the ward, which is the neighborhood or community essentially. And she reached out to my wife and introduced herself and said, she's excited to have us out there because she heard through the grapevine we were coming. So being connected that way, uh, and then having some familiarity with the way that our church is run. So there's a lot of familiar things there that I think will translate and make us feel more comfortable.

00:42:15.780 Um, but yeah, it's just a matter of putting yourself out there, putting your kids out there, getting them involved with other kids and other sports and other hobbies and interests and activities and, uh, and then bonding together and making sure that you're giving them plenty of your time and attention physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and, and working through it. Now I'm not going to say I'm the expert on this because, uh, we, we've made really just one move since I started having kids.

00:42:38.620 And it was when my, my oldest, who's 11 now, I think he was three at the time. So he doesn't remember. So I don't know how this is going to play out. I'm anxious to see how it plays out. And it's certainly something on my mind, but those are some tactics I'm using to, uh, ensure that this is as seamless as possible. Although I know there'll be hiccups and challenges.

00:42:58.220 Yeah. I mean, we moved our kids to New York for roughly about two years. And when you ask them about that experience, they're like, it was awesome. They loved it. They loved the experience and they didn't mind that it was temporary, you know, quasi temporary, you know, that it wasn't like some long-term thing. Like it was, it was good for them. I don't know. I think a lot of, a lot of those experiences that we stress out about as adults are, are actually really beneficial to the kids.

00:43:24.620 I think so too. I mean, I'll say my kids are nervous and every once in a while, they get a little emotional about it as they're playing with a friend and thinking this is the last time they may play with them. Um, but we have the conversations and let them know, and they're excited. My kids are excited. They're looking forward to it.

00:43:37.760 Yeah. Pros and cons.

00:43:38.340 Right.

00:43:38.840 Yeah.

00:43:40.460 Copy. So John Gilliland, when building your personal brand on social media, are you more interested in the quantity or the quality of followers and likes?

00:43:49.440 Oh, quality is, is significantly better. Quantity. Everybody gets caught up in, right? Like, Oh, how many, how many followers does this guy have? Look, I get caught up in it too. I'm like, well, I have 50,000. Now I need to get to 55 or a hundred thousand or whatever it is. But if you had to choose one, you, you would choose, you choose quality.

00:44:10.000 What's a quality follower?

00:44:12.140 Well, number one, so this is going to come across, look, I'm just talking from a marketing perspective now. Okay.

00:44:18.440 So anybody who's listening, everyone's going to get upset because you're not talking about them.

00:44:23.060 Right. So anybody who's listening, who doesn't fall into this demographic, then that's okay. I'm still glad you're here, but this is just from a marketing perspective. So we're going into business owner mode right now. First, a man. Do women listen to this podcast? Yeah, of course. And I'm grateful that they do. In fact, I get a lot of messages from women, uh, specifically with a couple of different things. Number one, um, that they really like their husbands to listen.

00:44:48.420 And number two, that they had, that they're raising boys on their own. So I have a lot of women listeners that fall into that demographic. Now, frankly, frankly speaking, from a business perspective, we have programs for men. So men are our best listeners. That's, that's, that makes a more qualified listener than, than a, than a woman. Right. 0.53

00:45:08.140 Um, somebody who is a father would make a more qualified listener because we talk a lot about fatherhood and, and leadership within the family. Somebody who's married, somebody who has, uh, has advanced a little bit further in their career or are looking to make a switch into owning their own business or currently own their own business.

00:45:30.980 Uh, and then other people, uh, men who are highly motivated and ambitious. Uh, we work a lot in the physical and outdoor space as well. I've just noticed that these common characteristics happen to be the, the gentleman that we work best with. Yeah. And that resonate most with our message. So when I speak, that's who I speak to. And interestingly enough, Kip, you hit all of those categories.

00:45:59.420 We're just, we're talking to ourselves, right? We've, we've, we've, we've created the solution to our own problems and our own challenges. And that's why this resonates so much because I'm not speaking out of integrity. I'm not talking about things I don't understand. I'm talking about things I'm intimately familiar with that I'm experiencing in my own life.

00:46:23.260 So we've made ourselves the demographic and we speak that way. And when people say, well, you shouldn't do it this way. My answer is no, you should do it that way because the world needs to hear from you and the way that you see it. And I'll continue to do it the way that I want to do it because other people need to hear it from me in the way that I see it.

00:46:39.260 Yeah. Love it. So, I mean, really a takeaway for John here is, is, is, is, um, specifying what quality follower looks like for you based upon the actual brand itself, right? What is the ideal listener? What is the ideal follower? And what are those based on what you're trying to do? Yeah. So interestingly enough, John fits all of those demographics as well. Surprise, surprise, right? Like he's been, he's been with us almost since the beginning, if not the beginning.

00:47:09.240 Why? Because he hits, he's our demographic. And when, when we speak, he's probably like, dude, these, these guys are talking to me. That's right. We are by design. So, and I do want to say also that when we say quality listener or quality audience member, I'm not talking about worth. Okay. So don't send me an email or a message and say, well, these people are important too. I'm not, I'm not saying they aren't. I'm just saying that we have, like, for example,

00:47:39.240 Home Depot, they market specifically to men who are either contractors or DIY guys around the house. So their marketing and their branding and their messaging is catered to that demographic. That's it. That's, it means nothing more than that. So don't, you don't need to look into it more than that.

00:47:57.540 Martha Stewart is not marketing to men. She's marketing to homemakers, women, homemakers. Doesn't mean she doesn't like men or has anything against men. It just means that this is who she's serving through her business. The end. Same thing with Ellen. I think about Ellen. Men, I assume that her primary audience is women. It's not men.

00:48:22.120 So it's not, she doesn't like men or doesn't think they're valuable or whatever. Just that's who she serves. That's all it is. I just know there's going to be people who email me and want to tell me how wrong I am about that.

00:48:33.660 Well, and not to get on a, I mean, maybe we don't even want to touch this, but like, did you hear the criticism that Joe Rogan got on his podcast? Supposedly.

00:48:41.960 I don't know. What was it about?

00:48:43.940 Oh, that he didn't have enough.

00:48:45.560 He didn't have enough.

00:48:46.280 He doesn't have enough female guests. 0.99

00:48:47.600 Okay. Well, go start your own.

00:48:49.680 Totally.

00:48:50.040 You know, like Joanna, go start your own podcast called Joanna Rogan and you can interview whoever the hell you want to interview. 1.00

00:48:56.080 Yeah. Or who's primarily listening to Joe Rogan? Like based upon his audience base, that's probably who he determines should be his guests. Period.

00:49:06.780 I don't even know if that's true. I mean, he, he has, he has plenty of women on the podcast. He has plenty of people from diverse ends of the spectrum when it comes to political viewpoints.

00:49:17.920 And I don't want to get off on a tangent. I'm just saying like, if you don't resonate with somebody's message, okay, they're not obligated to change it for you. Just find something that you resonate with or create it yourself.

00:49:29.540 Yeah. Love it.

00:49:59.520 What's your thoughts on casting a vote while in prison? If you know, there is a chance of the government is sending people to prison for political reasons. Should they still be allowed to vote? It's a question I've been thinking about for a while.

00:50:11.240 No, they shouldn't be allowed to vote. Like why, why would we, why would we want people who break the laws to vote for the people who make the law? Like that sounds ridiculous. It sounds absolutely absurd. Now to the point about, will the government send people, political opponents, for example, to prison? Okay. Then we need to vote those people out who are corrupt. That's a corruption issue.

00:50:37.000 Yeah. Fix that problem. Right. That's a different problem. That's an unrelated problem. So yeah, that, that definitely needs to be addressed, but I don't want violent felons dictating the direction of this country. Like, does anybody want that? Oh, but it's their rights. Oh, it's the rights. Well, they gave up their rights.

00:50:56.940 When they decided they didn't want to follow what we have collectively as a society deemed to be appropriate behavior and good for the, the, the, the commonality of society. If you want your rights, then operate in a way that you, you, you maintain and preserve those rights. No.

00:51:16.660 I mean, these people who complain about, well, their rights, their rights, their rights are the same people that are complaining or want to take away, uh, or, or, or abolish the second amendment. It's like, well, you're, but now you're just cherry picking, right? So do you really care about rights or is it just the issue that you care about? And look, I'm, I'm fine for being divided on issues, but if you're going to take the moral authority or high ground of saying, well, sir, constitutional right, then don't complain to me about the constitutional right to carry a firearm.

00:51:45.360 There you go. Kyle Trout, for those of us that are brand new to this journey of becoming a man, what do you think is the most important first step to take?

00:51:56.900 Uh, go to the gym. I made a post the other day. I, and I'm just telling you, like, if you want to become a better man, you'll go to the gym and you'll train and you'll lift heavy weights and you'll do it consistently because everything required to have success in the gym is the same thing that's required to have success in the gym.

00:52:15.360 Success in the walls of your home and in your business. And as a coach and a mentor and a teacher and whatever else, whatever other capacity you're serving in. So go to the gym, sacrifice, be dedicated, be committed, be disciplined, have some grit, some resilience, some fortitude, learn how to get strong physically, mentally, emotionally, and it will translate perfectly into every other facet of your life.

00:52:38.460 I love it. Chase Saxton, you know what we should do? Sorry. I'm going to interrupt you here real quick. Cause we're, we're, we're getting close to an hour. We should just make this a rapid fire section.

00:52:50.160 You want to do this? Let's do a rapid fire. Let's see how many we can, uh, how many we can get through right here. 0.96

00:52:56.940 Battle plan next done. Chase Saxton. All right. Taking what David Goggins did in his first ultra marathon. As an example, where do you draw the line between determination and foolishness? As some, my father being one of them would say Goggins showed foolishness and insanity in what he did and injuring himself.

00:53:15.420 The answer is effectiveness. And that's subjective. That's different for everybody. What's, what, what's effective and what ultimately Goggins wants to accomplish is different than what I do. So if I'm doing things that hinder my ability to be effective or move me towards my goals, then it's foolishness. If I'm doing things that are moving me closer to what I want, then it's not, it's just determination, grit, and moving me closer to those things. So you have to determine for you what you want and then are your actions in alignment with accomplishing what you want.

00:53:43.500 Yeah. An example of that is Goggins would say that it wasn't foolish that it served him, right? Because he has different objectives than I do. Yeah. Chris Mills, after being bullied for so long, how would one go about handling conflict and not going into a fight or flight mode?

00:54:01.380 Get yourself in more fights. And I'm not saying be reckless. I'm saying go, go to the gym and train jujitsu and learn how to defend yourself in a controlled environment where you become familiar with violence and, and pain and stress.

00:54:19.420 And then when you're faced in a real world situation, it's not as stressful to you. Also learn how to communicate effectively, uh, and, and have some situational awareness and keep yourself out of stupid situations. I see this all the time, guys, somebody, somebody had talked about it in our Facebook group, an altercation they got into with, uh, uh, he bumped into a woman at the bar and her boyfriend got upset and punched him or shoved him and kicked him out of the bar. 0.98

00:54:47.900 And now he feels, he feels like a weakling. It's like, okay, well, what, what else? Well, he was drunk. Well, yeah, man, if you're drunk and you stumble around the bar and you bump into a woman, you just increased your odds of getting into an altercation. So if you're going to do that shit, know what you're getting yourself into or be a responsible man and don't get sloshed to the point where you can't walk straight.

00:55:17.900 So, so don't put yourself in the environments, learn how to communicate effectively, know how to walk away and resolve situations without, uh, resorting to violence and also be capable of violence. 0.99

00:55:32.640 Next question.

00:55:34.500 Caleb crash. Ryan, as a former financial advisor, what books would you recommend in relationship to learning more about financial education?

00:55:41.620 Um, oh man, there's, there's so many, uh, Dave Ramsey's got some good stuff on debt and basic budgeting.

00:55:50.440 Um, Chris Hogan, we had on the podcast not too long ago called everyday millionaires. Kind of an interesting look at that.

00:55:56.780 Uh, a random walk down wall street is really good. Um, Dr. Daniel Crosby has some great stuff on behavioral finance, uh, the laws of wealth and behavioral investor.

00:56:08.860 Uh, he was on the podcast not too long ago. So yeah, there there's four or five right there. You can get started with.

00:56:15.380 All right. Brian Boyd, what would be your action plan? If your top managers want you to make leadership decisions, but your words spoken, written, don't hold water because you lack a title in front of your name.

00:56:28.300 You're not getting the promotion and they will not verbally state my decision or action plans as being followed, but they still rely on me to make decisions. It is very frustrating and confusing.

00:56:38.740 Well, I think part of that is in your own head, right? I think you're, you're attributing to their lack of following to a title. And I might, from an objective standpoint, if I knew more about the situation, attribute it to your lack of leadership, not necessarily your lack of title.

00:56:53.100 So if you are an effective leader, they are going to follow you regardless of your title or not. So you need to figure out what's going on and why they're not following you. Are you, are you not communicating effectively? Are you not casting vision? Are you being too demanding? Are you, uh, mincing words? Are you not clear on what you're trying to accomplish? Like what is it that's happening here?

00:57:20.900 Do you not have credibility? Are you not proficient in the skillset of what you guys, what you're asking your guys to do? These are all great things that you can ask yourself. And so you can't control that title thing right now, but you can control how you're communicating and how you're presenting yourself. Are you professional? What do you look like? You know, do you look like a little boy in baggy clothes and, or do you look like a professional in a clean fitting suit or whatever your uniform is when you go into work?

00:57:50.800 And you're, you're, you're groomed and you're communicating clearly and, and, and loudly and effectively. These are things that you can focus on. And I promise if you focus on those things, the other things are going to start to work themselves out. If you don't need the title, the title is going to be great when you get it right now, you don't have it. So what else can you be doing to get to that point?

00:58:08.200 Yeah. And they're obviously giving you some leadership opportunities, right? To step up and, and they obviously are asking for your insight and direction. So run with it.

00:58:19.100 Yeah. Read Jocko's books. Extreme Ownership is really good. Uh, sounds like there might be some ownership stuff going on here with you anyways. Uh, and also the assertiveness workbook, which is a really good workbook that'll help you be more assertive in your communication and, uh, in your objectives.

00:58:32.860 Okay. John golem, golem, golem, bisky, golem, bisky. Okay. There you go. Sorry, John. All right.

00:58:43.580 We always talk about putting ourselves in uncomfortable and challenging situations to help us grow. Sometimes those challenges include engaging with those that have challenging viewpoints. Do you ever see interviewing someone for the Tuesday podcast that may have some views that challenge and conflict with the movement? I think if someone that won't be too argumentative could be a very constructive and insightful conversation. Thank you.

00:59:08.800 Yeah, sure. If you have ideas, let me know. I don't have any problem with that. So if there's somebody you can think of, that would be a good addition to what we're doing here or, or be an interesting conversation or discussion, then let me know. We'll make it happen.

00:59:21.640 Awesome. Jason column. Why do you think you are qualified to answer these questions? Jason, have you not heard this answer yet? But go ahead, Jack, Ryan.

00:59:30.900 Um, I mean, what, what, what, what qualifications does he want me to have? Yeah. Like what, like what would qualify me for, to answer these questions? People asking you. That's it. I have some credibility and authority in people's lives. Why? Because they've given it to me. Not because something I've taken. They've have voluntarily decided to ask me a question. So that makes me qualified to give you my opinion.

00:59:58.220 Done. Done. Alec, uh, Candela. Can I say one more thing about that? Of course. And notice I use the word opinion. I'm not so arrogant to believe that everything I say is objective truth. I'm giving you a perspective from my own reality, from, from, from what I see and what I've experienced in life and you can take it or leave it, but I don't need to convince you. I'm not, I'm not here to convince anybody that what I'm saying is right or that you have to do it this way.

01:00:28.220 But if you agree with me, then we'll, we'll, we'll do this together. And if not, then I'll wish you on your way and you can wish me on my way. And hopefully you find what you're looking for.

01:00:36.600 Well, and most importantly, like not everything is like a perfect fit, right? Like how often Ryan, have you talked to, to an individual and you're like, that's really great insight. Or you may ask for advice and then you're molding, you're molding it over and adjusting it to how it might apply to you.

01:00:54.580 Right. Right. It's don't be so naive and ignorant that, that a response to something is exactly applicable. Half these questions, we don't even have enough information.

01:01:05.640 Yeah. Right. It's like, good point. It's where we're general, the questions generalized and we're generalizing response. Also, we, you can all be educated enough to say, Hmm, how can that apply to me? And does that make sense? And what adjustments could I possibly make?

01:01:19.260 Right. Now, if somebody is asking me about how to perform brain surgery and I attempt to give you an answer, well, I might be full of shit. Right. But, and we would probably skip those anyway. So. 0.99

01:01:30.380 Right. And if you didn't, I would simply say, I'm not qualified to give you that advice, which I think I've done in the past.

01:01:37.040 You have, you have, you have. Let's take a couple more. All right. Alec, uh, Candelari ever thought of hosting an order of man games to determine who amongst us is the best competitiveness here.

01:01:51.840 I would love to do that. I'm, I'm actually, we're, we're kind of doing that in the iron council through our rank advancements in our achievements and the achievements span all of our quadrants. So again, it's, uh, it's calibration. So getting right physically, or excuse me, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually it's connection. So your relationships, it's condition, which is your physical health. Uh, and then it's, uh, contribution, which is being more value, becoming a more, uh, a man of value.

01:02:16.380 So these are all achievements that guys will be able to unlock, and then they'll achieve experience to points and they'll be able to level up based on those experience points. And there'll be a leaderboard where you can actually go in and see, okay, well, you know, Ryan's at a level 10 and Kip's at a level nine and so-and-so's at a level seven. And this person's at a level two, and here's what they can do to achieve the next, uh, the next level and et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. So we are actually trying to gamify this a little bit.

01:02:41.300 Yeah. And there, and we've done challenges even in the past, like physical challenges where we're tracking the progress that guys are making on, on different physical challenges. And we're announcing who the winners are. Right. And of course, what team is superior to another team on a given challenge. So it's all good stuff, man. Especially with guys. I mean, we gotta compete for sure. Yeah. All right. Last question. Ben Nilsen, out of all the interviews you have done, Ryan, which one has been the most impactful to you and why?

01:03:09.480 Out of all the events. Oh, it's the interviews. Oh, interviews. I'm sorry. I thought you said events. Uh, man, so many to choose from. Uh, I really liked my conversation with John Eldridge because he, his book really transformed my life. And I began to look at my life a whole lot different and figured out some things about my childhood through reading that book. Uh, I would say that that's one of the most impactful. Goggins was really good. Jocko three was really good.

01:03:38.760 Those are the three that, that really stand out in my mind right now. Dakota Meyer was really good, man. Just so many, so many. Andy Frisilla has been on, I think three times now or two, two or three times. He's, he's a good friend. And every time I talk with him, I think differently about life. I've, I've just had so many incredible conversations. So blessed to be able to do this.

01:03:59.220 How much more impactful are some of those interviews when you're able to do them in person? Is that, does that change it way better?

01:04:06.160 Way better, way better. That's why when we get out to Maine, I'm going to create a podcast studio and I'm going to start doing a lot more, uh, face-to-face interviews and then doing the audio or the video as well. And so those will be on YouTube. So in the next four to five weeks, be on the lookout for that as well.

01:04:20.040 Awesome. Well, gentlemen, if you want to connect and support this podcast, you can do so by subscribing to the podcast, leave a rating review. Um, you know, we talked a lot today around the iron council and some of the challenges that we're doing and, and kind of really, I mean, to, to be frank, guys, everything we talk about this on this podcast is at the center of what we're doing.

01:04:42.860 And the IC, I mean, that's, it's really just like the, the, the participant portion of the podcast, uh, to learn more about the iron council. You can go to order of man.com slash iron council. And to join us on Facebook and to get your, have the opportunity to submit your questions to this AMA. You can go to facebook.com slash groups slash order of man. And to connect with Mr. Mickler, you can do so on Instagram and Twitter at Ryan Mickler.

01:05:11.240 What else? We have the origin camp coming up in August 25th through September 1st.

01:05:17.140 Yes. That's coming up. Yep. To register, go to origin, main.com slash order camp. And that will, uh, add you to our list. So we know that you're attending, but also you can get your hands on an order of man rash guard, which will be created by origin.

01:05:32.540 That's right. I think you covered it, man. I think that's, uh, I think that's it. You did a good job.

01:05:38.460 Thanks. I've been practicing.

01:05:39.720 You have, I can tell you've got like what, 40 episodes under your belt now. So we're rocking and rolling. Well, Kip, I appreciate you guys. Yeah. I appreciate you as well. Keep asking the questions. Keep stepping into this masculinity. I, it seems like more and more, I mean, every time I turn around and this might just be because I'm, I'm in the business. Uh, but I, but I believe it's a little bit more prevalent, if I can say that, uh, than it's ever been is this dismissal and attack on, on the idea of masculinity. So keep stepping up in big ways. I'm inspired.

01:06:07.000 I think I'm more inspired by you than maybe you are, uh, of me and what we're doing here. But I would ask that you share this. Uh, we need to continue to grow the podcast because we need to continue to get this message out. Connect with me. Like Kip, Kip, you said on Instagram, Twitter at Ryan Mickler. And, uh, let's keep doing the thing. All right, guys, go out there, take action, become the man you are meant to be.

01:06:26.040 Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.

Order of Man - May 15, 2019

Strategies for Success, Creating a Culture of Integrity, and Maximizing Personal Branding ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

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