00:02:57.040In fact, my friend Andy Stumpf is coming out here in the next couple of weeks and we're going to do a podcast and shoot some arrows and make sure you're subscribed.
00:03:05.060We have also got our Ask Me Anything episode, which is me and my co-host Kip Sorensen.
00:03:11.460And we're fielding questions from our exclusive brotherhood, the Iron Council, and also from our Facebook group.
00:03:16.900The only announcement I have today is, again, I'm here in Maine and I'm about 20 minutes, 15 minutes or so away from Origin, Maine, their factory and their podcast studio and everything that they've got going on.
00:03:30.640And I've spent a couple of days over there.
00:03:32.740Guys, if you aren't familiar with what these guys are doing, go check it out.
00:03:35.960I mean, their manufacturing process, the company, the message, 100% made in America, everything they're doing is incredible.
00:03:44.140They've got their Brazilian jiu-jitsu rash guards and geese.
00:04:04.100That's the Malk, the Joint Warfare, the Super Krill, and the Discipline all partnered up with Jocko that I use in my fitness and health regimen.
00:04:13.820OriginMaine.com and then use the code ORDER, O-R-D-E-R at checkout and you'll get a discount when you do.
00:04:20.360So that's all I've got by way of announcements.
00:04:22.400Today, I wanted to talk with you about seven different strategies for making yourself successful in a new environment.
00:04:30.780I'm obviously in a new environment and we get a lot of questions and thoughts about how you can meet new people, how you can develop friendships or build a band of brothers, especially in a new environment.
00:04:42.880Now, this could be something like a new community or a new state.
00:04:48.780I think I know, I don't know, eight people maybe, uh, or it could be a new, uh, career.
00:04:55.480If you're starting a new job and you're in a new environment that way, or going into college or wherever you may find yourself out of place because you're not in with the crowd, if you will.
00:05:06.320And that's what I wanted to talk with you about today, uh, because it's my goal and my objective to get very familiar with the area that I'm in, get very, very familiar with, uh, the people that, that live here.
00:05:17.080In fact, I've had a lot of opportunity and success to do that already.
00:05:20.940And I've had to push outside of my comfort zone a little bit.
00:05:24.000It's always awkward when you're trying to meet new people.
00:05:25.960It's definitely more comfortable to have an existing friendship or circle.
00:05:30.200Uh, but when you're a new place, that's difficult.
00:05:32.240And I want to make sure that I really assimilate and embed myself into this community because it represents all sorts of opportunities.
00:05:41.020And that's the biggest thing that you need to understand is that any opportunity that may present itself in life in general is always going to come because you have a connection with another individual.
00:05:52.020There is no opportunity that I can think of that doesn't come through your relationships, through networking efforts and the opportunities that others will present to you.
00:06:03.480So if there's one reason that you need to push yourself outside of your comfort zone, and I know this is easy for some of you, I also know that it's very difficult for a lot of you because you are maybe introverted by nature.
00:06:17.520I know this is going to sound weird because I do this podcast and we're reaching millions and millions of men across the planet, but I tend to be by default a little bit more on the introverted side.
00:06:26.420I have no problem being here at the house and of course, spending time with my family or watching a show or reading a book and not having to go out into public and, and participate that way.
00:06:37.560Uh, but I do it because it's good for me.
00:06:41.500Uh, I recognize that opportunities come through other people.
00:06:44.540And so I deliberately and intentionally push myself outside of my comfort zone so that I can meet new people and I can have the friendships that, that I want.
00:06:53.520So I'm just going to jump right into the seven or eight points that I had, uh, I had listed here.
00:06:58.380I wrote these things down as I was thinking about what my strategy is for being successful in, in Maine.
00:07:04.780And I hope that it helps you to some capacity.
00:07:07.060If you've got other ideas or other thoughts on how to do this, please let me know.
00:07:10.780I'm very, very active on Instagram, uh, which is at Ryan Mickler.
00:07:15.040I'm also active on Facebook and Twitter.
00:07:17.600Uh, and again, we're going to have a YouTube out, uh, the channel up and running before too long.
00:07:22.160So if you're interested in that, head to, uh, youtube.com slash order of man.
00:07:28.200Number one, uh, I think one way that you can definitely assimilate and get to know people is through some sort of spiritual organization or church function.
00:07:37.540In fact, uh, we met some members from our congregation, uh, before we even moved here.
00:07:43.840One of the, the women in, in our congregation reached out to my wife before we moved here and said how excited she was to have us out.
00:07:51.220Uh, and they came over her and her husband and a friend came over the other day unannounced, which was fine with us.
00:07:57.120We thought that was not a problem at all.
00:08:02.320We'll go this, this weekend, but, uh, I think having, uh, some sort of, of religious or spiritual organization that you can tap into is very, very key when it comes to meeting new people.
00:08:13.940And the reason, one of the reasons I should say that this is so powerful is because you can be fairly certain that a lot of the principles and the way that you operate your life is very, very similar to the way.
00:08:26.980These other individuals are probably operating theirs.
00:08:29.320Now, of course there's going to be differences, but it's good to find people who believe in the same thing from a religious or philosophical standpoint.
00:08:36.540So there happens to be a church, not our church necessarily, but a church just right across the street from where we're living, which is kind of cool.
00:08:43.400And I can see these people on Sunday when we were here, uh, how many people are getting along and, and, and going to church and, and meeting and, and, and they're friendly and they have the friendships.
00:08:52.700And of course they have the solid foundation of how they are to operate and live their lives.
00:08:57.260So number one is if you can find yourself in a spiritual or religious organization or a church or a chapel, or just go explore, maybe you aren't currently, but maybe you're, that's something you're interested in.
00:09:08.720Then bounce around, try a lot of different congregations and, uh, and, and denominations and see if something fits for you.
00:09:14.780But that's certainly a way to develop friendships and connect with people who believe, uh, like you do.
00:09:20.500Uh, number two is look for business and, or civic organizations.
00:09:25.980So the couple that come off, uh, come, come to mind right off hand is chamber of commerce.
00:09:31.260So next week I'm going to be attending a chamber of commerce meeting.
00:09:34.440Now, whether I join the chamber or not is, is up for debate right now.
00:09:39.080Uh, I'll, I'll see what I, what I think of it and what I like and how I might be able to help, but I'm definitely going to go.
00:09:44.880Now, when you go to a chamber event, who you're going to meet with, you're going to meet with business owners.
00:09:48.960You're going to meet with executives in the area.
00:09:51.660You're going to meet with probably some politicians, people who are well-connected, who are fairly successful and who are interested in connecting and networking with other individuals.
00:10:01.120So although you might go and feel awkward and uncomfortable, that's why they're there.
00:10:09.060And that eliminates one of the barriers to entry, or at least brings the bar down a little bit because people are naturally going to be friendly and outgoing and, and want to introduce themselves.
00:10:19.980There'll be other visitors besides you.
00:10:21.780So chamber of commerce is really good.
00:10:26.220That's more focused on the, uh, the civic side of things.
00:10:29.420Uh, you have lions club business network international.
00:10:33.340These are all great ways to find people who are interested in business and specifically networking, and then also interested in giving back to the community and growing the community and serving, uh, your neighbors and people in the area.
00:10:46.420So if you're not looking for these business opportunities, these, uh, I should say networking opportunities, I think you're really doing yourself a disservice.
00:10:54.760So again, number one, spiritual organizations, religious congregations, number two, business, uh, organizations, meetings, and civic organizations as well.
00:11:04.740Uh, number three is simply just finding friends in the area.
00:11:08.640Now I've got my friend, Pete Roberts and Brian Littlefield, and a couple of others.
00:11:13.080Uh, these guys have been instrumental in introducing me to other people.
00:11:16.900I've only been here for, gosh, I think four or five days now, but I have met probably a dozen contacts.
00:11:24.140Maybe even more through Brian and through Pete, uh, they've been gracious enough to open up their network and introduce me to, uh, to other people who are influential in the community who want to meet.
00:11:36.940Uh, I just met, uh, uh, very successful business owner in the area yesterday.
00:11:41.520Uh, he invited me over to his family's place, uh, this weekend for, uh, a graduation for one of his children, a graduation ceremony or, or party.
00:11:51.100I should say for one of his children, uh, again, pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone, but, but I don't want to say leverage necessarily because that gives it a, maybe a negative connotation.
00:12:01.240It's not that, but just utilizing your contacts and your friends for other opportunities, other introductions, and then putting yourself in environments, uh, where you're going to get those introductions.
00:12:12.180And even potentially ask for it, uh, also, in addition to friends in the area is neighbors.
00:12:18.840I mean, you have people that are surrounding you that you want to get to know.
00:12:22.440Uh, there's a family just across the way here who, uh, bought a piece of property, a young family, very, very similar to ours, five kids.
00:12:31.360And my son and I were out walking our property a couple of days ago and he drove by and he, he swung by and he said, Hey, I know you're moving into the area and we're moving into the area.
00:12:57.660I didn't get a chance to meet her husband yet, but, uh, I'm, I'm putting myself in the position where I'm, I'm meeting neighbors because I want to know the people around me.
00:13:10.020Uh, it's going to take you exerting yourself a little bit, um, putting yourself out there, stepping outside again of your comfort zone and getting to know the people in, in the community and in your neighborhood.
00:13:20.340And if you see somebody walking along, you know, pull over and say, hello, introduce yourself, uh, bring, bring something over to somebody.
00:13:27.600Uh, people are bringing things over to us.
00:13:29.300I mean, it's, it's, it's, it's a great community that we live in.
00:13:32.680Um, and I think most communities are like this, as long as you're willing to open yourself up, let others know that you are receptive to, uh, expanding your network into, into meeting new people.
00:13:43.200I think you're, you're not going to have that big of a problem.
00:13:45.520So you've got friends and, and, uh, and neighbors as well.
00:13:48.160Number four is your hobbies and your interests.
00:13:52.040There's other people in your community who are very, very interested in the same things you are, whether that's shooting or hiking or painting or jujitsu or archery or whatever your heart's desire.
00:14:03.760There's people in your area who are very, very interested in the same things that you are.
00:14:08.180So for me, uh, that happens to be jujitsu.
00:14:11.060There's a lot of, uh, jujitsu gyms here.
00:14:13.120Uh, I'm going to be going, in fact, this evening, as of this recording to, uh, to class tonight, to training, and I'll meet people who, again, they're interested in the same things I am.
00:14:23.240So we're going to connect at that level at a minimum, if not more.
00:14:27.380And I'll be consistent about going to these things.
00:14:29.820Uh, I've been asking about archery shops in the area now, for whatever reason, there, there doesn't seem to be any archery shops in this area.
00:14:36.980So, but if there was, that would definitely be an opportunity to connect.
00:14:41.180Uh, there are a couple of, of, uh, businesses that, uh, sell firearms and ammunition that I'm going to go me as well, because I want to know those people.
00:14:51.960And so our ability to connect and have conversations and, and, and forge a new connection are going to be simplified because we tear those barriers down when we find people who are interested in the same things as us.
00:15:05.140Uh, if you don't know where those things are, wherever you are, just ask, you know, I was at the local hardware store this morning, picking up some, some hardware for, uh, doing some, some fixing some furniture that we had to, had to repair.
00:15:17.040Uh, and I asked him about archery shops.
00:15:45.900Although I personally have, have not tapped into it because I've found other ways to connect through hobbies and interests.
00:15:51.440Uh, number five, just go where the people are.
00:15:53.980Are there certain areas in, in your town, or if it's at work, there are certain people, uh, who are hanging out, whether it's in the break room or by the water cooler or whatever.
00:16:03.240Wherever people are, you just need to go there.
00:16:22.640You know, if you, if you shell up or hole up in your, in your house or your cubicle or wherever, and you don't put yourself in environment environments, uh, that, that, that are around other people, then I mean, you're not going to meet other people.
00:16:36.120You're just waiting for somebody to come to you.
00:16:39.840I mean, it might happen because you have somebody who's, who's friendly and courteous might come introduce themselves, but you got to be assertive.
00:16:47.260Just like any other facet of life, just like we've been talking about for the past four, almost five years now is you've got to be very, very assertive.
00:16:55.260You've got to find out where people congregate.
00:16:57.480And then you've got to go to those places and have a reason to be there and then be able to have conversations and, and talk with these people.
00:17:05.300Again, I know it's uncomfortable, I know it's awkward, but if you want the opportunities and you want to find yourself in a good position, in a new place, a new environment, a new community, a new office, a new career, whatever that may be, then you've got to go where the people are.
00:17:19.300And point number six actually ties in very, very nicely with this is, uh, is just tell other people that you're new, you know, just open your mouth and just say, Hey, I'm new here.
00:17:30.200A very simple question that I've asked as I've gone around town, I went down to the local convenience store a couple of times over the past week or so.
00:17:39.100And, and I met, met one of the women there and, and I said, Hey, I were just new into the area.
00:17:43.560Is there anything around here that I ought to be aware of?
00:17:46.300Is there any, uh, cool, cool sites to visit?
00:17:50.880These are questions that I've been asking and that'll help me get in the know and help me see what's going on and have my ear to the ground because I have no idea.
00:17:58.880But I'm going to ask people who have been here for a very, very long period of time.
00:18:02.500I also tell people, uh, this, this gal, for example, who's at the convenience store, um, she talked to us about the house that we bought because there's some history here.
00:18:10.900And she gave me a few pointers on the intersection because the intersection is a little, little dicey where we are.
00:18:25.300And I said, you know, if, if you want to stop by and say, hi, you know, feel free to come by.
00:18:30.580We've had people who have come by unannounced.
00:18:33.120Um, we had, in fact, one of our state senators, uh, lives just right down the road.
00:18:37.820He has a farm right down the road and he's been, uh, leasing part of our property and he haze part of our property.
00:18:43.680Anyways, he came up this morning and, and introduced himself.
00:18:46.840And man, that's a great person to know somebody who's got a relationship with a previous owner.
00:18:50.980He's a state senator. Uh, and it, and it's just because I'm, I'm opening my mouth and I'm telling people where we are and, and, and letting them know that we're new.
00:18:59.760And we're trying to find ways to, to serve and to help and, and, and be here.
00:19:04.020And that also leads into point number seven, which is the last point that I wanted to make with you here today.
00:19:09.640I know it's kind of a short one today, uh, but you've got to be interested in what other people are interested in, right?
00:19:15.400Like if you come into an environment and you do your own thing and you're the rebel and you're the lone wolf and you put yourself on a mantle or above other people, uh, you're going to have a very, very difficult time connecting.
00:19:27.060I think a lot of the times people have some, not problems necessarily, but reservations with new people because they don't know.
00:19:36.640And if you distance yourself and, and, and be an a-hole, uh, for example, then, you know, they're not, they're not going to be attracted to you.
00:19:46.780They're going to be repelled maybe even by you because you represent potentially a threat to their current way of living.
00:19:53.800Uh, in fact, one of the neighbors that I met, uh, he had just bought a new property.
00:19:59.460And he says, you know, a lot of people have a hard time when, when outsiders that he says from over there move into an area is what they do is they start putting fences up and no trespassing.
00:20:10.000And he says, you might get to that point, but I wouldn't recommend doing that right away.
00:20:27.300And I think it's on us as the visitors of these environments to assimilate into these, into these communities and into these neighborhoods and be interested in what other people are interested in.
00:20:39.900If you have information or have resources or have connections or ideas or whatever it may be, maybe somebody just needs to borrow some eggs or some, I don't know.
00:20:49.020Then, then be there and be interested in them and, and serve those other individuals.
00:20:54.340And you're much more likely to find yourself in a good environment.
00:20:58.640Now, I know this is going to, is not going to apply to all of you guys because you're not all in new, new communities that you're, you're moving to, but it's universal.
00:21:07.620Whether again, you're at work or a lot of questions from guys who just took up new leadership positions, who are wondering how to gain and garner attention and respect from the rest of the team, especially if they're young or they advanced through the ranks very quickly.
00:21:24.800These are things that you can do every single day in order to earn respect, to develop and build connections, to have friendships, to build allies, which is important as opposed to enemies.
00:21:38.960I want everybody in this neighborhood.
00:21:40.720We live on a little intersection here.
00:21:42.580I want everybody in this neighborhood to be an ally of mine.
00:21:45.900I don't need to make enemies in this area.
00:21:47.660I need to have allies and friends and people who are looking after us.
00:21:51.640And if I want that, then I have to be willing to do that for other people.
00:21:55.240So whether you're moving or not, it doesn't really matter.
00:21:59.100I want you to take what I shared with you today and here, I'll recap this here in a minute and think about how you can apply this in your life to more adequately preside.
00:22:08.360And we've talked about this at length.
00:22:10.000If you've been with us for any amount of time, you know that a man's primary functions are to protect, to provide and to preside.
00:22:19.500I am a leader in my home as a father and as a husband, but I plan on being a leader here, a leader on the street that we live on, a leader in this community.
00:22:47.360It's not that philosophical, necessarily 30,000 foot view, but this practicality is very important.
00:22:52.600For those of you who are young, for those of you who are trying to find your way in a new set of circumstances and a new environment, these are seven things that you can do again every day that are going to help you assimilate, that are going to help you be successful, that are going to embed yourself.
00:23:11.860And then people are going to look at you favorably, and ultimately that will foster confidence, that will foster credibility, certainly, and influence in others' lives as well.
00:23:27.560I think we've got internet coming tomorrow as of this recording.
00:23:32.520So that'll be nice because I'll be able to get access back to my emails and try to get on some semblance of a routine, which has been a challenge up to this point.
00:23:44.980A couple of little hiccups and snags and challenges here and there.
00:23:48.040But I want to thank you for being understanding with some fill-in guests and different things like that as we've tried to transition.
00:23:54.260I definitely want to thank you for being a part of the order, being a man of the order, if you will, because this opportunity that we have out here is absolutely incredible.
00:24:05.760And I know some of you have seen the property and we'll be doing some video and things like that here soon and seen the land and we're going to put together some events.
00:24:13.780None of this would be possible without you.
00:24:16.120Without you listening in, without you supporting us through the merchandise that we offer, without joining the Iron Council, which you can find at orderofman.com slash ironcouncil, without coming to the events, you yourself and bringing your sons and participating and being assertive in everything that we're doing here.
00:24:36.560And I hope that this has become a powerful tool and a resource for you in your own life to become more capable as a father and a husband, a business owner, a community leader, a coach, a mentor, a friend, a neighbor, a brother, a son, whatever, however you're showing up.
00:24:55.680I hope this is the go-to resource for improving yourself as a man.
00:25:04.660And I think we'll be able to do it here at our new headquarters in Maine.
00:25:08.300And it isn't lost on me that the opportunities that have presented themselves here are in large part, overwhelmingly large part to you tuning in and being part of the order.