Order of Man - Taking Risks, Bridging the Gap Between Science and Spirituality, and Instilling Discipline in Children｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.

00:00:06.020 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.

00:00:10.480 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong.

00:00:15.500 This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become.

00:00:19.760 At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.

00:00:25.400 Kip, what's going on, brother?

00:00:27.240 Not much, man. Excited.

00:00:29.080 AMA number seven.

00:00:30.640 Is it number seven already?

00:00:32.040 Yeah, look at us.

00:00:32.960 This has been going good, man.

00:00:35.280 We're rolling.

00:00:36.600 I think the guys like it. I think it adds a new dynamic to what we're doing here with the podcast.

00:00:41.080 Yep, yep. I think I got a nickname somewhere in here today.

00:00:44.960 Oh, I saw that. What do they call you, though?

00:00:47.940 The Laugh Track? I don't even know what it means.

00:00:49.960 That's what it was, yeah. Maybe they just like your laugh. Maybe it's just something about your laugh, Kip.

00:00:54.900 They just like it. They enjoy it for whatever reason.

00:00:56.600 Or they're just tired of you not being funny.

00:01:00.000 That's true, and they need a break from the seriousness of me.

00:01:06.280 Of the order.

00:01:07.120 Of the order, of Ryan.

00:01:08.380 Yeah, of the order of Ryan.

00:01:09.880 That's right.

00:01:10.400 The seriousness.

00:01:11.100 That's right.

00:01:11.460 But it's a serious topic. It's hard not to be serious, to be frank.

00:01:14.440 I know, but also, there's something to be said for not taking everything so seriously.

00:01:19.740 And it was so funny because I was talking to my wife the other day, actually last night.

00:01:24.000 And there's people who are the opposite of me.

00:01:27.380 They're not serious all the time.

00:01:28.720 They're funny all the time.

00:01:29.760 And I told my wife, I'm like, you know, it's so frustrating that there's certain people who just can't take anything seriously.

00:01:35.520 And I'm thinking to myself after this, I'm like, there's probably people out there saying there's, it's so frustrating that there's just certain people like Ryan who can't just lighten up and have a joke and a good time every once in a while.

00:01:48.560 Yeah.

00:01:49.300 So it works both ways.

00:01:50.440 How common is that though, right?

00:01:52.640 That everything's about moderation and balance and perspective.

00:01:56.680 And it's, I guess it's no different with humor.

00:01:58.900 Well, there's, there's a time and a place for everything, right?

00:02:01.120 And it's got to be appropriate.

00:02:02.080 And so if you're joking about everything and, and you're taking everything so lighthearted, even the serious topics and subjects, then I think you're doing yourself a disservice.

00:02:11.020 But I also see the errors of my ways that if I'm serious, a hundred percent of the time, and here I am talking about being funny, but doing it in a serious way, like a logical, you know, I'm thinking this out.

00:02:20.960 If you're, if you're serious all the time, like that's, that's not productive either, right?

00:02:26.160 You got to have both.

00:02:27.540 Yeah.

00:02:27.860 So I'm going to try to be more funny this week.

00:02:30.360 I love it.

00:02:31.540 Let's, I don't know.

00:02:34.660 Anyways, guys, Hey, look, singing.

00:02:37.120 Yeah.

00:02:37.620 Well, start singing first.

00:02:39.140 So speaking of singing, I don't know if you saw the post of me singing.

00:02:43.660 Did you see it?

00:02:44.980 What?

00:02:45.620 Yo, yeah.

00:02:46.200 On Facebook or Instagram?

00:02:47.700 So I'm in the shower the other night in the shower, doing my thing, taking a shower.

00:02:53.040 And I start singing the national anthem just for fun.

00:02:56.160 I'm just having fun.

00:02:57.000 Just singing it loud.

00:02:57.860 And I knew my wife was in there.

00:02:59.120 So I was kind of singing it to her, but joking.

00:03:01.360 Yeah.

00:03:01.720 And so I'm like, so I finished the national, national, I bring it home.

00:03:04.840 I finished the national anthem.

00:03:06.480 I opened and I say, what do you think of that, hon?

00:03:09.000 And I opened the, the shower door and she recorded it and she posted it.

00:03:16.980 I love it.

00:03:17.640 So it's on the interwebs, me singing with gusto.

00:03:21.140 I might add the national anthem with the beard, with the beard, fear the beard, you know, I'm

00:03:27.860 thinking maybe we should pause recording just really quick, just so I can go watch this.

00:03:32.200 You'll have to watch it later.

00:03:33.400 Maybe you need to change the intro music into the podcast.

00:03:36.640 I shouldn't make it that.

00:03:38.680 That'd be awesome.

00:03:40.140 Guys, if you don't know what we're doing here, this is Kip.

00:03:43.320 This is me, Ryan.

00:03:44.500 We're doing our seventh ask me anything.

00:03:47.100 So what we do every Wednesday is we answer questions that members of our brotherhood,

00:03:53.880 the iron council have.

00:03:55.300 We answer questions that our Patreon members have, which by the way, Kip, we got a new Patreon

00:04:00.180 member.

00:04:00.760 So now it's, it's Bubba Downs.

00:04:02.740 Who's also a member of the iron council.

00:04:05.200 It's Sam Stoddard and my mom.

00:04:07.800 So it's those three.

00:04:09.460 Of course you signed up your mom with her.

00:04:11.680 That's right.

00:04:12.960 Yeah.

00:04:13.380 She wouldn't even sign up.

00:04:14.320 I had to sign her up myself.

00:04:15.820 And, uh, and then also questions from the order of man, Facebook group.

00:04:21.520 So I think we've probably got, I don't know, 20 questions or so.

00:04:24.560 Yeah.

00:04:24.800 This, this will be tough to get through all these, but it's, it's good for us to have

00:04:28.620 a good backlog.

00:04:29.580 So, and the other thing guys too, is like, this is, this is not formal.

00:04:32.920 I mean, we've got these questions here in front of us, but I haven't looked at them.

00:04:36.820 I haven't seen them until this morning.

00:04:38.800 Kip, I don't know how much you go through these things, but this is just off the cuff,

00:04:42.320 off the collar, just having a good time answering these questions at the best of our

00:04:45.300 ability and, uh, just having a cool conversation.

00:04:48.180 Yeah.

00:04:48.540 I kind of aggregate them and that's about it.

00:04:51.080 There's a little bit of pre-reading just because I'm curious as I'm copying and pasting them.

00:04:55.960 Um, but beyond that, there's, there's not much prep.

00:04:58.620 Yeah.

00:04:59.060 Yeah.

00:05:00.180 Well, cool, man.

00:05:00.980 Well, should we just jump right into it?

00:05:02.240 I always say that jump right into it, but we take 10 minutes before we even get into

00:05:06.320 this thing.

00:05:06.640 So let's just jump into the questions and guys, if you have questions, three different

00:05:11.020 ways to do it, you can join our brotherhood.

00:05:13.000 And of course that's called the iron council.

00:05:14.540 Of course you get significantly more out of it than just the ability to ask questions.

00:05:18.480 Go check that out.

00:05:19.640 Order of man.com slash iron council.

00:05:22.160 Uh, you can become a Patrion member, which is Patrion P A T R E O N.com slash order of

00:05:29.620 man.

00:05:29.860 And there's benefits there.

00:05:31.040 And then also our Facebook group, which is facebook.com slash groups slash order of man.

00:05:36.340 And Kip, you and I had a conversation about what's a backslash versus just a regular slash,

00:05:41.800 but you guys know how to get there.

00:05:43.240 Yeah.

00:05:43.740 And, and just so you guys know, last two weeks, 760 new members.

00:05:48.740 Really?

00:05:49.220 That Facebook group.

00:05:49.960 We're almost at 50,000.

00:05:51.720 I saw that.

00:05:52.180 I think we're like less than a hundred members away from 50,000 men in our Facebook group.

00:05:58.560 And, and hundreds and hundreds of thousands of downloads on the podcast every month.

00:06:03.520 I mean, this thing is really starting to blow up.

00:06:05.940 It's exponentially growing.

00:06:07.220 So I just got to say, I appreciate you.

00:06:08.740 If you're here guys and you're listening, I appreciate you.

00:06:11.440 I think it's a testament to the power of this message.

00:06:13.640 Not me or Kip, certainly not Kip, but, but it is a testament to the power.

00:06:20.940 Of what we're doing here, which is our objective to restore and reclaim masculinity in a society

00:06:27.920 that seems to push it away, reject it, hide it, and want to run from it.

00:06:31.340 It's our job to restore it.

00:06:32.940 And so I appreciate you guys being here.

00:06:34.240 And of course, appreciate you sharing this with any man in your life who needs to hear

00:06:37.460 this message.

00:06:38.700 Hell yeah.

00:06:39.260 And, and we know it has nothing to do with me because I think more guys joined the order

00:06:43.940 of man Facebook group in the last week than I have total friends on Facebook.

00:06:49.260 I'm not sure what that says.

00:06:50.220 What can we say?

00:06:50.820 Well, yeah.

00:06:51.660 What, what, what can we say, Kip?

00:06:53.020 It is you, man.

00:06:53.700 It is.

00:06:54.020 It's, it's grown exponentially since you've joined us on the podcast.

00:06:57.400 That's true.

00:06:57.940 I'm pulling the numbers.

00:06:59.000 We're going to pull the stats.

00:07:00.160 We're going to prove.

00:07:01.120 That's right.

00:07:01.460 It has to do with me.

00:07:02.280 That's right.

00:07:02.600 All right, man, let's get into this.

00:07:04.240 All right.

00:07:04.560 First question, Tony Urzi, Iron Council member.

00:07:08.080 What's the biggest risk you've ever taken?

00:07:10.140 And what did you learn from it?

00:07:11.920 The biggest, man, the biggest risk.

00:07:14.000 Well, the biggest risk I ever took was joining the military.

00:07:16.760 I mean, there's a lot of uncertainty and unknown, and you're putting yourself closer to harm's

00:07:20.800 way just by default of what it is you're signing up for.

00:07:24.300 I joined when I was 18, maybe just barely 18.

00:07:29.260 I joined my senior year of high school.

00:07:31.080 I joined the army national guard before high school was out.

00:07:35.180 Yes.

00:07:35.520 Before I graduated, I joined crazy.

00:07:37.940 And then, uh, I ended up going to basic training right out of high school.

00:07:41.440 Uh, I went to, I think I had a couple of months of summer and I went to, uh, to a neighboring

00:07:46.460 city and live with some buddies for a couple of months and, and came back.

00:07:49.900 And then I went to basic training, which was Fort Sill, Oklahoma.

00:07:52.740 I'm an artillery guy.

00:07:53.760 So I went out there, uh, did, if I remember correctly, four, four and a half months of basic

00:07:59.780 training and then AIT, which is advanced training came back.

00:08:03.780 Uh, we did a couple of little local and regional tours.

00:08:08.160 We did the Salt Lake Olympics.

00:08:10.180 We manned that into the security for the Salt Lake Olympics.

00:08:13.400 Uh, we were supposed to go to Iraq in 2003, a week before we were leaving.

00:08:17.900 Uh, we were in Fort Carson, Colorado.

00:08:20.260 Our commander said, Hey, we're not going anymore.

00:08:21.860 We're going to Fort Lewis, which is in Washington.

00:08:24.860 And we trained ROTC cadets there for the summer.

00:08:28.140 Uh, then I came back home and in 2005, we January of 2005, we actually ended up being

00:08:35.200 deployed to Iraq.

00:08:36.800 I actually found out in November Thanksgiving.

00:08:40.960 It might've even been the day before Thanksgiving 2004 and I came home.

00:08:46.460 My wife was already at her parents' house. 0.98

00:08:48.900 We, we lived about seven hours away.

00:08:50.720 My wife was at her parents' house and, uh, her dad said something to the effect of like,

00:08:55.520 what's wrong with you going to Iraq or something?

00:08:57.140 Cause I was down.

00:08:57.860 And I said, yeah, as a matter of fact, I am, our unit got deployed.

00:09:01.420 That was at Thanksgiving and it sucked all of the life out of the family Thanksgiving dinner.

00:09:07.080 Uh, so that was November of 2004, then ended up going in 2005 to Iraq.

00:09:12.040 We did six months stateside.

00:09:13.980 Uh, we were in Mississippi for six months and, uh, California for some climate training.

00:09:20.120 And then we did a year in Iraq.

00:09:23.620 So that was the biggest risk I ever took.

00:09:25.920 Uh, what did I most learn from it?

00:09:28.000 Well, I learned a lot.

00:09:29.160 I, frankly, I learned how to be a man through my military experience, especially through basic

00:09:32.920 training and coming out of that right out of high school, uh, basic training.

00:09:37.080 Wasn't really all that hard.

00:09:38.640 I think a lot of people tried to hype me up and scare me and some buddies that had joined

00:09:42.060 with me, but we'd always been in sports.

00:09:43.740 We always done hard things and we had coaches.

00:09:45.680 So it wasn't hard.

00:09:46.980 Basic training wasn't hard.

00:09:49.000 Uh, but got through that, learned about discipline, commitment, dedication, sacrifice, of course,

00:09:53.260 all of those skills.

00:09:55.160 Uh, and then when I went to Iraq, one of the biggest things I took away from that is what

00:10:00.640 it means to play for keeps.

00:10:02.700 You know, we, we don't, we don't play for keeps.

00:10:06.020 We're, we're talking about seriousness earlier in this podcast.

00:10:08.980 And, you know, I think everybody takes things so lighthearted in their lives that they don't

00:10:14.280 realize the gravity of the choices they're making.

00:10:16.700 And there's times, yes, to be lighthearted and to have fun and relax and, and, and, and

00:10:22.460 just let out a little bit.

00:10:23.900 But there's also times where it's, it's, it's a time to take things, things very seriously.

00:10:29.080 And I don't think we as a society do it enough.

00:10:33.400 Uh, and, and the, the serious things that we do take seriously is, is the things that 0.92

00:10:38.140 we decided to be outraged about, which again, is absolutely ridiculous.

00:10:40.760 We can talk about that another time, but, um, I learned what it was like to play for

00:10:43.900 keeps and the gravity of the decisions that we're making because we were making life and

00:10:47.560 death decisions over there.

00:10:48.760 So I learned a ton from my military experience, but that was the biggest risk I've ever taken.

00:10:52.900 And, and it's played out very well for me.

00:10:54.940 Yeah.

00:10:56.540 Awesome, man.

00:10:57.680 Well, and we didn't talk about this last week, but nine 11.

00:11:00.500 So were you already in the military before nine 11 happened?

00:11:04.360 Yeah.

00:11:04.560 So I joined in 99.

00:11:06.620 Cause that was when I, that was, that was when I was a senior in high school.

00:11:10.080 Okay.

00:11:10.480 So two years later, obviously 2001, September, 2001, um, I was managing a retail clothing store

00:11:17.780 at the time.

00:11:18.320 And man, I remember that day.

00:11:19.540 That was, that was crazy.

00:11:21.120 In fact, every, every store in the mall that I was working at closed their doors that day.

00:11:27.300 And I didn't, I was managing that store.

00:11:29.500 It was journeys, journey shoe store.

00:11:31.740 And I didn't close.

00:11:33.120 I think there was one other store that didn't close.

00:11:35.100 And my personal belief and philosophy behind that was, no, I'm not going to let this impact

00:11:41.400 the decisions that I make.

00:11:43.160 And so it was more for me, like a, not a, not a protest, but a statement.

00:11:47.760 And I think we sold like three shoes that day.

00:11:51.120 But cause nobody was there, but I'm like, I'm not closing.

00:11:53.580 I don't, I don't care if nobody comes in today.

00:11:55.900 I'm not closing my doors for nothing.

00:11:57.960 And so we stayed up open me.

00:12:00.180 And in fact, I think I let all the employees go home if they wanted to.

00:12:02.780 And it was just me at the store and a man, crazy, crazy times.

00:12:06.580 But yeah.

00:12:07.080 And I remember when we tore down that statue of Saddam, uh, I believe that was 2003.

00:12:13.240 I was, I remember very specifically, I was in the chow hall at, uh, camp Williams, which

00:12:18.640 is in Northern Utah.

00:12:21.220 And remember watching that because we were getting ready to be deployed at that time

00:12:25.400 and thinking this is insane.

00:12:27.460 And again, we didn't end up going at that point.

00:12:29.760 We went two years later.

00:12:30.920 Well, it's funny how, when that statue came down, I think at least for me and, and people

00:12:36.380 that I know, we kind of assume that like, oh, it's the sign of like the war is going

00:12:41.420 to be over.

00:12:42.040 Yeah.

00:12:42.880 Well, I mean, if you look, if you look throughout history, when America gets involved in a war,

00:12:48.380 we were essentially signing forever.

00:12:53.680 I mean, that's, that's, that's the deal.

00:12:55.820 You know, we're, we're still in Korea and Germany and we'll be in Iraq forever in the 1.00

00:13:00.300 middle East because we just, we just don't leave.

00:13:02.780 And I think that's part of the, well, I think that's part of the problem is we've lost the

00:13:06.680 ability to determine what is a win?

00:13:08.300 What is victory?

00:13:09.600 Now I don't get into games, for example, that I don't know the rules and the ultimate

00:13:15.900 objective.

00:13:16.440 And I think that's one of the biggest challenges that we're facing in, in, in current times

00:13:20.920 is we get into these conflicts and yet we haven't determined what a victory even means.

00:13:25.480 So how is it that we can possibly win?

00:13:27.300 Well, you can't, if you don't know, again, a, the rules and B what the objective is.

00:13:32.440 It's, it's, uh, it's scary, man.

00:13:34.160 It's a scary time for sure.

00:13:35.300 When it comes to these conflicts that we're engaged in.

00:13:37.600 Well, and that relates so much to what we talk about in the iron council and, and, you

00:13:41.720 know, it can be applied to, to people's goals and objectives.

00:13:45.360 And we have this conversation all the time, like, okay, I, I want to be in shape.

00:13:49.720 Well, what does that mean?

00:13:51.420 Specifically, like exactly body weight, you know, like we need to be specific.

00:13:56.880 So we know when we're winning and what adjustments we need to make to ensure that we do win.

00:14:00.820 A hundred percent.

00:14:02.260 Yep.

00:14:02.540 A hundred percent.

00:14:03.100 The more specific you can be about your objectives, the more likely it is that you can work towards

00:14:09.040 those things and have the right and take the right actions in order to achieve those objectives.

00:14:12.340 Absolutely.

00:14:13.180 Cool.

00:14:13.660 What else?

00:14:14.040 So Matthew Patton, his question is, is really around, um, him signing up for stuff.

00:14:19.400 He uses the example of signing up for go rucks, um, and doing other, other events.

00:14:25.560 And he feels that more people think he's crazy, right?

00:14:28.780 For doing things that serve no purpose.

00:14:31.180 When everyone you talk to says you're crazy at what point do you consider maybe they're right?

00:14:36.580 How do you stay sure that the norm is wrong?

00:14:39.120 I mean, look, 90% of people are usually wrong and it's, it's, it's really fascinating unless

00:14:45.360 we're talking about statistical data or research or mathematics or something like that.

00:14:49.460 But when it, when it comes to the way that we approach our lives, 90% of the people are

00:14:53.480 more or wrong.

00:14:54.340 It's just, it's just the way it is.

00:14:55.880 You and I, Kip, we talk about the 1% all the time, right? 0.99

00:14:59.020 Or the Pareto principle, which is the 80, 20 rule.

00:15:02.660 It's just the way life is.

00:15:05.000 And so if somebody says you're signing up for hard things that quote, serve no purpose,

00:15:09.420 well, that's not true.

00:15:10.700 That's a faulty premise.

00:15:12.500 You may not recognize the purpose, but just because you fail to recognize it does mean,

00:15:17.320 does not mean it serves no purpose.

00:15:18.960 You know, when I sign up for these events too, whether it's going to a jujitsu camp or doing

00:15:24.900 the Spartan a gogi or a Spartan race, or like, like Matthew's talking about and doing go

00:15:29.380 ruck events.

00:15:29.900 Like I have people that say, why would you pay for that? 1.00

00:15:32.140 Why would you go pay to get your ass kicked? 1.00

00:15:33.840 Like, because I'm not paying to get my ass kicked. 1.00

00:15:36.640 I'm paying to build mental fortitude, physical tough, resiliency, resolve. 0.99

00:15:42.860 All of these things are going to translate perfectly into me being a father and a husband

00:15:48.080 and a community leader and a business owner.

00:15:50.340 So I'm sorry that you have failed to see the purpose, but please don't mistake that for

00:15:56.200 there not being purpose to it in the first place.

00:15:58.640 That's number one.

00:15:59.320 Uh, the other side of this guy, I mean, you, you can't let other people who aren't where

00:16:06.140 you want to be dictate what you're going to do in life.

00:16:09.680 Like you would never take fitness advice from somebody who's severely obese.

00:16:14.320 You would never take financial advice from somebody who's broken destitute.

00:16:19.900 You would never take relationship advice from somebody who's lonely and scared and doesn't

00:16:25.740 know how to relate with other people, or at least you shouldn't.

00:16:29.260 And it's the same thing when it comes to this.

00:16:31.280 If these people are mediocre and they're average and they're complacent and they're just getting

00:16:36.220 by, why would you let their opinion dictate your behavior? 1.00

00:16:41.440 Maybe you are crazy. 0.64

00:16:43.760 Maybe, maybe compared to what the standard and the status quo is. 1.00

00:16:48.920 Maybe you are a little weird. 1.00

00:16:50.680 Maybe you are a little crazy. 1.00

00:16:52.140 Does that make it wrong? 1.00

00:16:53.400 No, because I want to be crazy.

00:16:55.700 I want to be different.

00:16:56.700 I want to be in the 1%. 1.00

00:16:57.840 I want to be among the slim few people who actually do something big and bold and audacious.

00:17:04.840 And I'm never going to let anybody who doesn't have that same capacity or vision for whatever

00:17:10.100 reason, pull me down from where I feel like I should be. 0.99

00:17:14.620 So yeah, Matthew, you are crazy. 0.99

00:17:17.520 You're, you're among a small percentage of people who actually cares. 1.00

00:17:21.560 And I say, good on you.

00:17:23.560 That's a good thing.

00:17:24.740 Don't let those other people say it's not.

00:17:26.260 Yeah.

00:17:27.360 Keep up the crazy, Matthew.

00:17:29.180 Absolutely.

00:17:30.720 All right.

00:17:32.160 COVID minor.

00:17:33.400 Once you've completed a 12 week battle plan, maybe we should explain this a little bit

00:17:37.060 as part of the response to this.

00:17:39.420 But his question is, once you've completed a 12 week battle plan and you choose new objectives,

00:17:43.360 how do you stay consistent on keeping your old objectives up?

00:17:46.900 If you're wanting to keep them into your daily routine without the accountability that

00:17:50.900 comes from the tracker?

00:17:52.240 Well, the idea of the 12 week battle plan, like you said, kid, let's break this down a little

00:17:56.020 bit.

00:17:56.240 And I'm just going to skim through this to answer the question.

00:17:58.540 The 12 week battle plan is a planning tool that we have used, incorporated, modified,

00:18:04.840 tweaked to fit what it is we're doing inside the iron council.

00:18:07.700 And essentially you're creating four main objectives in four key categories of your life.

00:18:14.660 And we're working on those objectives over a 12 week period.

00:18:17.940 That's all it is.

00:18:18.640 Very simply put.

00:18:19.580 And it's in the book that I, that I wrote that came out in February of this year, earlier

00:18:23.360 this year called sovereignty.

00:18:24.820 But that's, that's what the battle plan is.

00:18:26.680 Essentially, we strip everything else away.

00:18:28.220 So when the 12 week is up, Coven's asking, okay, so how do you keep all of the things

00:18:34.920 that you've been doing up to this point in your, in your daily routine, right?

00:18:39.220 Well, that's the point.

00:18:40.900 It should become routine at that point.

00:18:43.260 So let's say one of your objectives over a 12 week period is to lose 20 pounds, let's

00:18:47.680 just say.

00:18:47.980 And in order to lose that 20 pounds, you've said, well, I need to, uh, diet, I need to

00:18:55.160 cut out processed sugars.

00:18:56.580 I need to drink more water.

00:18:58.680 And you define exactly what that is.

00:19:00.100 And then I need to work out an hour every single day.

00:19:02.620 Look, if you do that every day for 12 weeks, it has become part of your routine.

00:19:09.680 So very simply just keep that as part of your routine.

00:19:12.640 I started CrossFit four years ago, four years ago.

00:19:15.780 It's so routine at this point that I feel as weird about not going to work out as I

00:19:22.940 do not brushing my teeth in the morning.

00:19:25.780 That's the point that you need to get to.

00:19:27.440 You need to get to a point where the behaviors and the patterns and the routines and everything

00:19:33.540 that you're doing on a daily basis are so natural that you don't even have to think

00:19:38.540 about it because when you have to think about it, then you have to consciously choose, should

00:19:42.460 I work out or should I not?

00:19:43.780 But if you're not even thinking about it and you're incorporating those healthy habits

00:19:47.800 into your life, then you can build upon that foundation.

00:19:51.760 So the answer to the question is it should be routine by that point.

00:19:57.140 And if it isn't, maybe you need to refocus on the 12 weeks again and double down.

00:20:01.260 Okay.

00:20:01.820 Yeah.

00:20:02.280 That's what I was going to ask is if it's not routine, would you suggest that you carry

00:20:06.380 that over into the next quarter?

00:20:08.600 Yeah.

00:20:08.820 But then they're also, and here's the challenge.

00:20:10.860 There comes a point in time where it's, it's like, dude, if you've been doing 12 weeks and

00:20:16.600 same 12 weeks and it's the same 12 weeks and it's the same another 12 weeks and it's the

00:20:21.380 same because you have the same objectives.

00:20:23.020 Something's wrong.

00:20:24.340 Yeah.

00:20:24.740 Your objective is off maybe, or your tactics.

00:20:28.500 And we can talk about this a different time.

00:20:30.040 The way you go about achieving that objective is wrong, but something's off.

00:20:33.980 If you have to do this over and over and over and over again.

00:20:37.480 So every 12 weeks, in fact, I suggest every 30 days, you should be evaluating your plan

00:20:43.040 to make sure.

00:20:43.660 Am I on track?

00:20:44.360 Am I not?

00:20:44.880 Where do I need to course correct?

00:20:46.060 Where do I need to tweak and adjust this?

00:20:48.200 Because if you're not on track at that point, something's not working.

00:20:51.500 You need to figure out what it is as soon as possible and correct it quickly.

00:20:55.820 Yeah.

00:20:56.200 And not wait until the, the 12 weeks are up.

00:20:58.900 Right.

00:20:59.120 Because what some people do is they'll, they'll make a new year's resolution.

00:21:01.860 For example, we'll just use the weight thing again.

00:21:04.160 Okay.

00:21:04.380 January.

00:21:04.840 I want to lose 30 pounds this year.

00:21:06.620 Three months go by.

00:21:07.640 I still want to lose 30 pounds.

00:21:08.960 Another three months still.

00:21:10.220 Yep.

00:21:10.480 30 pounds.

00:21:11.240 Another three months.

00:21:12.180 Oh, I'm actually five pounds.

00:21:13.220 Now I need to lose 35 pounds.

00:21:15.200 Oh, it's okay.

00:21:15.920 I'll just wait because I'll do another new year's resolution.

00:21:18.200 Well, congratulations.

00:21:19.520 You had an objective, but that's where your planning ended and you got nowhere.

00:21:23.780 In fact, you, in this scenario, you, you, you made it worse.

00:21:27.500 Yeah.

00:21:27.940 And wasted an entire year.

00:21:29.620 Exactly.

00:21:30.500 Exactly.

00:21:30.860 So you, you've got to have a very clear cut plan outside of what it is you want.

00:21:37.500 Great.

00:21:37.800 You know what you want now.

00:21:38.880 How are you going to get it?

00:21:40.280 That's just as important as knowing what you want.

00:21:42.860 Cool.

00:21:43.680 And you got what?

00:21:44.560 Three weeks left after we wrap up this 12 week.

00:21:46.940 I think we have two or two, two or three weeks left in this quarter.

00:21:50.200 So finish strong.

00:21:52.280 Yeah.

00:21:52.660 Two weeks because we get ready.

00:21:54.680 We're ready for that new 12 week battle plan.

00:21:56.740 Absolutely.

00:21:57.940 Love it.

00:21:58.520 Cool.

00:21:58.620 All right.

00:21:58.880 So Andy Selig, his, he doesn't have a question.

00:22:01.500 He has a recommendation and he's telling you just riff it out, bro.

00:22:05.940 Way better that way.

00:22:07.420 Well, there you, thank you, Andy.

00:22:08.900 That's what, that's what I love, Andy. 1.00

00:22:11.080 He is a complete pain in the ass most of the time. 1.00

00:22:16.620 But you know what? 1.00

00:22:17.940 He's, I love him all the same.

00:22:20.000 I like Andy because he tells it to me straight.

00:22:22.540 He gives me real feedback.

00:22:24.140 He's not at what I call a yes man, a bobblehead.

00:22:26.480 And I always appreciate Andy's insight and perspective.

00:22:30.420 It's, it's, uh, it's different than mine most of the time, but it comes from a place

00:22:34.100 of, of help.

00:22:34.980 So I always appreciate it.

00:22:36.640 So is Andy recommending riffing as in guitar playing or, or he's trying to encourage you

00:22:42.260 to still sing that Garth Brooks song?

00:22:44.040 Probably a little bit of both.

00:22:45.880 Maybe, maybe, maybe the guitar and sing that Garth Brooks song.

00:22:50.180 Yeah.

00:22:50.480 If you, if you riff it, then it's going to go really well.

00:22:53.380 I get, I don't think that'll work someday, someday.

00:22:57.100 Oh, I mean, we've got the shower and half naked probably in the shower.

00:23:00.300 So I'm not half naked, fully naked.

00:23:02.460 Fully naked.

00:23:03.000 How do you take showers?

00:23:03.940 I usually go just completely naked.

00:23:06.260 I just didn't assume that your wife got you full frontal. 0.90

00:23:09.180 I was, I was actually starting to wonder if you were a, uh, a never nude, you know,

00:23:13.100 where you, that's the thing.

00:23:15.340 I don't know if it's a thing.

00:23:16.560 It was on a show, arrested development.

00:23:19.320 Do you, do you remember that show?

00:23:20.820 I do remember the show, but I never watched it.

00:23:22.900 And I think the guy's name is Tobias and he's a never nude, meaning he's never nude.

00:23:28.540 That show is funny, man.

00:23:30.020 That's funny.

00:23:30.880 Anyways.

00:23:31.820 Never nude.

00:23:32.520 Never nude.

00:23:33.020 All right.

00:23:33.240 Kip is a never nude, by the way.

00:23:35.460 No, I'm not.

00:23:36.900 All right.

00:23:37.460 What else?

00:23:37.920 What else we got?

00:23:39.220 Joe Horton, another member of the Iron Council.

00:23:41.360 These are all Iron Council's, these first, uh, six questions or so.

00:23:44.800 They get, they get precedent, right?

00:23:46.320 I know.

00:23:46.760 And these, and these are good questions actually. 0.99

00:23:48.860 So it's all going to go to shit after these first six. 0.99

00:23:51.600 I'm just joking. 0.99

00:23:52.620 No, I'm sure the next questions are good.

00:23:54.340 I haven't looked at it.

00:23:55.260 I'm sure they are.

00:23:55.280 I'm sure they are.

00:23:56.520 Joe Horton.

00:23:57.320 How do you guys deal with holidays from a fitness point of view?

00:24:00.320 I have always let loose and indulged on holidays, but since joining the IC, I eased a bit with

00:24:06.940 my indulgent indulgences this year and have chucked in 100 pushups a day to tick over.

00:24:13.720 How do you balance time out with ticking over?

00:24:16.780 Same question could apply to weekends when the beer and desserts are beckoning.

00:24:22.380 Oh, so I think there's a little bit of a, well, so what, what, I don't know what he means by tick over.

00:24:30.260 Do you know?

00:24:31.160 I don't know, but I think the gist of the question is still there regardless.

00:24:35.400 Yeah. Okay. So here's what I would say.

00:24:37.520 Do the same thing. You always do.

00:24:39.520 Yeah.

00:24:40.000 Like why, why would a holiday dictate the way that you approach your life?

00:24:43.800 Now, are you going to take the day off from working out?

00:24:45.600 Maybe, but I'm not going to take two weeks from working out.

00:24:50.220 Right. Or if, if, if I have an activity and look, there's things,

00:24:53.520 whether that's a holiday or a travel or you're sick or whatever,

00:24:57.340 there's things that come up that are naturally going to keep you from your exercise regimen or your nutrition.

00:25:02.900 And I would suggest you do not let those things compound.

00:25:06.420 That's the problem.

00:25:07.580 The problem isn't you taking one day off to celebrate a holiday.

00:25:11.560 That's important to you.

00:25:12.700 The problem is, is that you take one day off and you're like, well, I took yesterday off.

00:25:15.920 I can just take the second day off.

00:25:17.560 And then you take that day off.

00:25:19.220 Well, you know, I kind of blew it, blew it this week.

00:25:21.340 I blew my, blew my workout and my, my eating this week.

00:25:24.220 So I guess, and then there's this, this standard in society that says it's okay that you gain an extra 10 to 15 pounds over the holidays.

00:25:30.860 Again, that goes back to, to Matthew's questions.

00:25:33.820 Maybe I'm a little crazy, but I'm not going to let the, the Christmas and new year holiday destroy my diet.

00:25:40.460 That, that actually they're, they're not correlated at all.

00:25:44.420 Whether people tell you or not, or whether you're marketed to or not.

00:25:48.000 So how do I handle it?

00:25:50.080 I do the same thing I would do the day before and the day before and the day.

00:25:53.740 It's the same kind of question when people say, well, Ryan, now that you're 37, what would you do different from what you, when you were 36?

00:26:01.100 I'm like, dude, that's less than 24 hours.

00:26:04.240 I would do the same thing I did yesterday.

00:26:07.020 And tomorrow, when I wake up 24 hours from now, I'm going to do the same thing tomorrow.

00:26:11.960 Because I know what healthy habits are.

00:26:14.240 And I'm going to, am I going to take the time, the day off on Christmas?

00:26:18.000 Yeah, probably.

00:26:19.540 But then the day after I'm going right back to it.

00:26:22.260 Am I going to take the day off on Thanksgiving?

00:26:25.160 No, I'm going to, I'm going to exercise and then I'm going to eat and I'm going to probably eat not as healthy as I normally would.

00:26:31.800 And then I'm going to get right back on the bandwagon because that's what I've committed to doing.

00:26:36.220 You know, the way I love looking at this, because we run into this within the iron council, right?

00:26:41.220 Where guys will have poor numbers on their battle plans because they took some vacay or took some time off.

00:26:46.600 And the question I posed to some of my team members is, would have, would your time off been better if you stuck to what you had on your battle plan?

00:26:58.680 So let me give you an example, Joe.

00:27:00.300 So let's, uh, well, I, I traveled in Europe a couple of years ago with my boys for about a month and I didn't have a gym, but guess what I did?

00:27:10.000 I woke up really early and I went running.

00:27:12.920 Do you think my vacation was better because I got that workout in?

00:27:18.760 It certainly was.

00:27:20.040 Do you, and, and I know this sounds even more crazy.

00:27:23.400 How amazing would Christmas morning be if I got a run in really quick before the kids woke up?

00:27:29.000 Yeah, true.

00:27:29.720 I would feel better.

00:27:31.300 Like, and the irony is, is we come up with these excuses kind of in our minds of like, oh, it's a holiday or whatever.

00:27:36.640 Guess what?

00:27:37.540 The best way to enjoy that holiday is probably still do those things to still do your morning routine, to still journal, to still go exercise.

00:27:45.900 Like some of the people, like a lot of people, they run, you know, like five K's or whatever on Thanksgiving.

00:27:51.020 Why do you think they do that?

00:27:52.380 Because it makes them feel good, right?

00:27:54.960 Most of those things, if we stick with it, regardless of holiday vacation, you're better off and you're having a better vacation anyway.

00:28:02.660 A hundred percent.

00:28:03.680 I, I wouldn't add anything to that.

00:28:05.200 I mean, that's, that's, but you know what, Kip, the other thing too, is that takes a lot of intentionality.

00:28:09.320 And I think that's where people fall short is they don't plan.

00:28:12.340 They're like, well, I'm going on a vacation and they get to where they're going and they're like, oh, I wonder, I wonder if there's a gym here.

00:28:17.740 Why didn't you think about that a week ago or a month ago when you planned it?

00:28:21.280 Or I hear people a lot of times, Ryan, how do you keep track on your diet when you're, when you're traveling?

00:28:26.140 You, you eat healthy.

00:28:28.440 Like maybe you're not going to be able to meal prep like you normally would, but you're telling me you, you could go into Wendy's.

00:28:35.620 Or McDonald's and still eat somewhat healthy.

00:28:38.520 I don't recommend doing that, but you can get a salad at McDonald's.

00:28:42.340 Yeah.

00:28:42.920 So don't tell me there's not any healthy alternatives.

00:28:45.420 It's just you being lazy and unintentional.

00:28:48.400 And I'm not saying this to Joe necessarily.

00:28:50.320 I'm just saying if somebody uses that as an excuse, they're just being unintentional about their life and they're going to experience results less than they're capable of.

00:29:00.980 Yeah.

00:29:01.420 So I like that he, I like that he added a hundred pushups in his workout or as in his, his regimen, because he's that again, that shows intentionality.

00:29:11.080 He's like, I got to do something.

00:29:12.140 And so he goes and he does it because that's what you do.

00:29:15.180 Yeah.

00:29:15.920 Yeah.

00:29:16.280 Good stuff.

00:29:17.240 Good stuff.

00:29:17.740 It's not really, I got to say one more thing.

00:29:19.320 It's not really a standard.

00:29:22.860 If it's conditional.

00:29:25.480 Right.

00:29:27.680 Like, like if you say my standard is I eat, I eat right.

00:29:31.240 And I exercise daily except when it's hard.

00:29:34.880 Okay.

00:29:35.260 Well, that's not a standard because there's conditions on it.

00:29:39.000 A standard, a principle means that you do it in spite of, and more so when it's hard than when it's easy.

00:29:47.160 That's the standard.

00:29:48.560 Yeah.

00:29:49.040 And when we want to talk about leaving lasting impact, it's when you stay and you stick to your commitments and you do those things when it's not convenient.

00:29:59.180 Yeah.

00:29:59.700 Regardless of circumstance, you want to inspire kids that what dedication and grit looks like.

00:30:04.600 Do all those things that you said you do, even when it's not easy.

00:30:08.380 Especially when it's not.

00:30:09.860 Yeah.

00:30:10.900 Anybody can be good when the stars align.

00:30:13.360 Anybody could do that.

00:30:15.160 What are you going to do when they're not aligned?

00:30:18.340 What else?

00:30:20.040 Chris Elder, as entrepreneurs yourselves, what steps did you take before leaving the comfort nine to five jobs to get your wife's on board and yourself mentally ready for the risk inherited in entrepreneurship?

00:30:33.460 I really like this question because a lot of the quote unquote gurus will say, burn the boats, burn the bridges, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

00:30:40.260 And then you ask them, how'd you do it?

00:30:42.020 They're like, well, my situation was different.

00:30:44.380 I didn't.

00:30:44.800 Oh, so you're telling me to take an unnecessary risk and it's one that you haven't taken yourself.

00:30:50.480 Well, yeah, but no.

00:30:53.020 The way that you do this, again, to come back to intentionality is you are very deliberate and you are very intentional about what it is you're trying to accomplish.

00:31:01.400 Now, these are two questions.

00:31:02.320 How do I talk with my wife about this? 0.90

00:31:04.340 And then how do I get myself prepared?

00:31:07.000 Right?

00:31:07.280 So let's talk about getting yourself prepared and getting yourself in the financial position.

00:31:11.220 When I started Order of Man four years ago, I wasn't, there was no avenue or no path to making money.

00:31:17.900 And I went seven months of podcasting every single week and doing blogs and posting on social media and all the things that we're doing.

00:31:25.620 Seven months without making a single dime.

00:31:27.720 But I also had another job and I started making money with Order of Man.

00:31:33.080 We can talk about how that is another time.

00:31:35.440 But two years into it, I realized, man, I am making some pretty good money in the business that I could potentially replace this other income.

00:31:47.760 And so I, so two years into the business of Order of Man, I went full time and I had a financial planning practice and I still stayed engaged in that.

00:31:55.620 And I also had some residual income coming in.

00:32:00.280 And it was only, like I said, I've been doing this for almost four years.

00:32:03.560 We're three and a half, a little over three and a half years now.

00:32:06.660 I just sold my practice two, three months ago.

00:32:10.000 So I had a very secure position in place.

00:32:13.120 I had a lot of residual income coming.

00:32:14.780 Now it's shut off, but guess what?

00:32:16.120 I sold the financial planning practice.

00:32:17.480 I have capital in the bank account to make sure that I handle emergencies and other costs that come up associated with business.

00:32:24.300 But I'm telling you, if you're trying to get yourself into that position, you need to replace your income or get close to or have enough money in the bank that will get you to the point where you can replace your monthly.

00:32:37.900 And I say income.

00:32:39.060 I would use expenses, actually, because I'd encourage you to go a little faster.

00:32:42.400 So cover your expenses.

00:32:43.220 Skim back on your expenses.

00:32:44.560 Cover your expenses and your monthly income.

00:32:46.340 Or at least have that much money in the bank until you can cover your expenses.

00:32:50.200 Does that make sense?

00:32:51.800 Yeah.

00:32:52.160 Okay.

00:32:52.420 Sure.

00:32:52.940 Now getting your wife on board, man, that's just a lot of conversations.

00:32:56.260 Inherently, men are more prone to take risks in their life.

00:33:01.200 Inherently.

00:33:01.920 That's the way that we're biologically hardwired.

00:33:04.300 So generally speaking, it's significantly easier for – maybe easier is not the right word.

00:33:11.620 More likely for a man to jump into entrepreneurship than a woman because a woman is – she wants to make sure things are secure. 1.00

00:33:20.580 She wants to make sure things are safe and they're comfortable.

00:33:23.660 And there's certainly a place for that.

00:33:26.940 But it's going to be harder to convince her that this is a good thing versus yourself.

00:33:33.080 So what you have to do is you have to prove that you're capable of handling yourself through past experiences in business.

00:33:39.060 There's a lot of conversations.

00:33:41.180 There's a lot of let me open the books for you.

00:33:43.220 Not only the financial books but just let me peel back the curtain and show you what it is we're doing.

00:33:47.620 And give her hope.

00:33:48.480 Give her optimism.

00:33:49.340 Have conversations.

00:33:50.300 Tell her when things are working and how they're going.

00:33:52.240 And when things go bad, tell her how you're going to handle that.

00:33:54.640 Communication is a huge, huge component of this.

00:33:57.300 It's exactly what I did with my wife when I started Order of Men. 0.78

00:33:59.620 She didn't understand what I was doing.

00:34:01.740 Frankly, I didn't really even understand what was happening.

00:34:03.660 But through communicating with her daily about what was happening and how this was growing and how this was working.

00:34:11.540 And I remember the very first person to spend money with me through Order of Men, Mark Gabloski.

00:34:16.280 And I showed her that.

00:34:17.440 I said, look, he signed up for the Iron Council.

00:34:21.000 And she was blown away.

00:34:22.160 She's like, what?

00:34:23.020 I can't believe that happened.

00:34:24.000 And that was a surprise to me too.

00:34:26.400 Your second member after your mom.

00:34:27.940 After my mom.

00:34:28.380 That's right.

00:34:29.440 But that's what she saw.

00:34:32.060 She saw the potential.

00:34:33.920 And then we had another one.

00:34:34.860 And another one.

00:34:35.480 And another one.

00:34:36.080 And another one.

00:34:36.580 And I showed her.

00:34:37.200 And I showed her.

00:34:37.780 And I showed her.

00:34:38.280 And I prove every day that the path that we're on is a great path.

00:34:43.180 Now, here's the interesting thing about this.

00:34:45.280 When I talk about this, inevitably, somebody listening or somebody who hears this is going to say,

00:34:49.140 well, you're a beta.

00:34:51.140 You're a beta.

00:34:51.980 You should just take charge.

00:34:53.420 Look, dude.

00:34:53.920 If you think communicating with your wife and getting her on board and proving that you can actually make a business work. 1.00

00:35:01.620 If you think that makes you a beta or a quote-unquote cuck is another term guys like to use in this scenario, you're an idiot. 1.00

00:35:10.220 You're an absolute idiot. 1.00

00:35:11.900 And I wouldn't be surprised if A, you're not married and B, you haven't been at least divorced once. 1.00

00:35:18.700 And I know that's going to sound harsh.

00:35:20.460 But look, if you make a commitment to a woman, you're in a partnership. 0.86

00:35:25.220 It's not you over her.

00:35:27.640 She's not subservient to you. 1.00

00:35:29.440 She's not your slave. 1.00

00:35:30.420 If you agree that you would make her your partner, and when you make somebody your partner, you have an obligation to open it up, to share your heart, to share what it is you're doing, to share the victories, the setbacks, and prove that you're worth being a partner.

00:35:46.260 Whether that's a business, a marriage, or any other relationship that you enter into.

00:35:49.760 The end.

00:35:54.520 All serious.

00:35:55.980 That's right.

00:35:56.320 I'm just joking.

00:35:57.240 No, it's solid, man.

00:35:59.080 It's totally solid advice, and it's so true.

00:36:01.040 The other thing I'd suggest, if I could add something for Chris here, some of this comes down to the men we are, right? 0.96

00:36:09.220 If my wife can't rely on me for shit, and I come home and I'm like, yeah, I'm going to start a new business. 0.98

00:36:16.680 She has no faith in me accomplishing that. 0.99

00:36:20.600 Well, not only faith, Kip.

00:36:22.480 That's it.

00:36:23.440 You've proven that you're incapable of it.

00:36:27.100 It has nothing to do with faith.

00:36:28.460 She's just looking at track record and seeing, where in your life have you ever done anything you said you would?

00:36:33.680 Yeah, totally.

00:36:34.360 So there's a lot of prep, right, based upon the man you're being in general, right, to be able to pull this off.

00:36:41.820 But I like the fact that Chris pulled this out and mentioned mindset, right, preparing your mindset.

00:36:47.940 Because I think a lot of the risk associated to starting your own business is very much a mental thing.

00:36:55.760 It's very much a mindset.

00:36:57.080 And in some cases, you could bust your tail, work for corporate America, and be an amazing contributor to a company, and that has no exact correlation to your ability to keep your job.

00:37:11.500 But when you work for yourself, there's almost an exact correlation between Ryan busting his tail and doing a great job and him increasing his income.

00:37:21.800 And so you say that's risky?

00:37:24.020 I don't know.

00:37:25.060 This seems a little bit more probable.

00:37:27.080 Right?

00:37:27.580 Than risky.

00:37:28.700 And so I think a lot of it comes down to mindset.

00:37:31.120 And I just totally agree with Ryan that a lot of this has to do with taking the necessary steps and have a plan and communicating the plan, too.

00:37:41.060 Like, I think sometimes guys go, I'm going to start my own business.

00:37:43.580 Yeah, I'm going to work.

00:37:44.220 Well, for how long?

00:37:45.440 Like, what are you going to do?

00:37:47.480 What is the exact plan?

00:37:48.920 You're going to try this for a period of time.

00:37:50.540 If you haven't reached these milestones, then you know it's not working.

00:37:54.540 Like, there needs to be measurable results, and that's part of that communication process with your spouse.

00:37:59.300 Yeah.

00:37:59.640 100%.

00:38:00.280 100%.

00:38:00.920 Communication is key.

00:38:02.160 Absolutely.

00:38:03.140 Yeah.

00:38:03.540 All right.

00:38:03.820 Michael Custode, Iron Council.

00:38:07.660 He has two questions.

00:38:08.900 Question number one.

00:38:09.620 Is it possible and or should you change your situation even if it means becoming a different person?

00:38:16.180 Fitness is an obvious yes.

00:38:17.860 However, I've been a people pleaser for all of my life.

00:38:21.380 When I try to stand up for myself, people then call me scary, intimidating, and unapproachable.

00:38:26.240 I can't seem to find a medium.

00:38:28.320 The older I get, the less patience I have for people.

00:38:32.280 I think that's natural.

00:38:33.760 Like, I was telling my wife the other day, we were on a date, and I don't know, somebody cut me off or they were driving slow or something. 1.00

00:38:41.060 And I'm like, get out of the way, you idiot. 1.00

00:38:42.800 You know? 1.00

00:38:43.880 And my wife just looks at me, you know, like, gives me this look like, what are you doing? 0.62

00:38:48.400 And I just thought to myself, I'm going to be the grumpiest old man there ever was.

00:38:53.480 Like, I'm going to be that guy on the movie Up.

00:38:56.300 The grandpa on Up.

00:38:57.960 That's going to be me.

00:38:59.780 So, yeah, I think that's natural tendency. 0.97

00:39:01.780 And you just have less patience for the bullshit the older you get because you just don't want to engage in it. 0.97

00:39:06.340 All right. 0.98

00:39:06.740 So, let's get to the answer of this.

00:39:09.420 All right.

00:39:09.600 So, is it possible to, what, change your situation if it means becoming a different person?

00:39:15.500 Yes, it's possible.

00:39:16.600 Should you?

00:39:17.060 Depends on what type of person you're becoming.

00:39:18.740 Are you becoming a better person or a worse person?

00:39:22.180 Yeah.

00:39:22.960 Could you, you know what, I don't know.

00:39:24.960 I think there's so much meaning to this.

00:39:26.960 Like, listen to this.

00:39:28.340 So, should you change your situation even if it means becoming a different person?

00:39:34.460 Yes.

00:39:35.280 What's our objective?

00:39:36.580 Become a better person or change your situation?

00:39:39.600 Like, sometimes situations don't change.

00:39:42.560 But sometimes we do.

00:39:43.900 Well, okay.

00:39:44.460 So, let me tell you this, Kip.

00:39:45.400 You know what I'm saying?

00:39:45.520 So, I made, yes.

00:39:46.380 And I made a post on Facebook today and I said, here's what I said. 0.99

00:39:50.040 Something to the effect of, if the current version of yourself couldn't kick the past versions of yourself's ass in every way possible, physically, mentally, emotionally, intellectually, you're doing it wrong. 0.98

00:40:03.720 Look, the point of growing up and getting older is to get better in every way possible. 0.96

00:40:12.140 There's the quote, no man steps in the same river twice for it is not the same river and he is not the same man.

00:40:18.080 So, you're going to be changing whether you like to or not.

00:40:21.740 There is no homeostasis.

00:40:23.940 There is no balanced situation that never changes.

00:40:28.720 It's always changing.

00:40:30.380 So, is it changing for the better or is it changing for the worse?

00:40:33.820 Is your environment getting better?

00:40:35.380 Are the people that you're surrounding yourself with higher caliber than the people you surrounded yourself with last year?

00:40:41.940 Are you a better person?

00:40:44.140 Do you know more?

00:40:45.520 Are you physically stronger?

00:40:47.300 Are you more capable?

00:40:48.600 Can you handle your emotions more maturely than you could in the past?

00:40:53.320 If all of those things are moving you in the right direction and only you can determine what that is, then yes, it's possible.

00:41:00.100 And yes, you should.

00:41:01.400 Now, if you have to become a new person for somebody else to accept you and you're moving in a direction that you feel is not in your best interest, I would say, no, you don't want to do that.

00:41:17.820 You want to be very cautious of that.

00:41:19.340 But I think very rare is the time when the people that you're surrounded with who love you and care about you, their goals are at odds with yours.

00:41:30.640 I don't think that's the case.

00:41:32.140 My wife, for example, our goals are not at odds with each other.

00:41:35.000 She wants me to improve, not only for myself, but for her.

00:41:38.060 And I want her to improve, not only for herself, but for me.

00:41:41.620 Because our objective is in line.

00:41:46.940 Now, there might be other people whose objectives are not in line with mine.

00:41:51.520 We'll take a boss, for example.

00:41:52.820 Maybe you have a boss who is not doing things right or maybe there's some integrity or character or maybe some illegal activities and he's going to want you to change in order to move in a direction that's going to benefit him.

00:42:08.000 But it's not the direction that you want to go.

00:42:10.180 So is it okay to change for that individual?

00:42:12.120 Hell no.

00:42:12.500 Hell no.

00:42:14.720 Now, on the other hand, if you have a boss who is inspiring and he's motivating and he's uplifting and he wants to serve people and he wants to make a boatload of money while he's serving other people and bringing a valuable service to market and he's teaching you and he's leading you and he's hiring people and he's paying his taxes.

00:42:31.740 Should you change for that individual?

00:42:33.960 I would say, yeah, that's a guy who I'm inspired by.

00:42:37.460 He can teach me something.

00:42:39.520 I want to learn from this guy because I admire him.

00:42:42.380 I respect what he or she is doing.

00:42:44.740 And so I'm going to change.

00:42:46.080 I'm going to become a new person because I like the version of that guy and I want to be more like that guy.

00:42:52.620 So who are you comparing yourself to?

00:42:54.360 Who is it that you want to become?

00:42:55.980 You've got to figure that out before you decide, am I going to change or not?

00:43:01.640 For sure.

00:43:02.640 For sure.

00:43:03.340 I love it.

00:43:04.100 Michael, we're going to jump to your second question.

00:43:05.880 Ryan, how, when, and why did you come up with your vision?

00:43:11.700 Not just order of man and I see, but with your whole life.

00:43:15.420 Every day, every single day I come up with my vision.

00:43:18.280 There isn't one aha moment where it's like the heavens part and the clouds part and the angels sing from above and sing, hallelujah, you found your vision.

00:43:29.260 That would be awesome.

00:43:31.160 But you aren't entitled to a vision.

00:43:33.180 You aren't entitled to know your path.

00:43:38.000 That has to be earned.

00:43:39.880 And forever changing for you, Ryan?

00:43:42.140 Forever.

00:43:42.880 How would it not?

00:43:44.620 How would it not change?

00:43:46.080 I'm introduced to new stimulus every single day.

00:43:48.620 Some of it's good and some of it's not good, but how would it not change?

00:43:55.160 Like you got to ask yourself, if your vision isn't changing every day, what are you doing?

00:43:59.500 Like, are you a hermit hold up in your little cell and not being exposed to everything that's amazing around the world?

00:44:06.320 It should be changing every day.

00:44:08.860 And this is why having a vision and thinking about vision and having margin enough time in your day to actually think about these things.

00:44:15.920 Like I ponder, I ponder the eternities.

00:44:18.200 I ponder the cosmos.

00:44:19.660 I want to know what life is all about.

00:44:23.580 I want to know why I'm here and what purpose do I have and what happens to me when I die and what happens to me when I serve other people and how do my kids grow up?

00:44:31.880 Like, I want to know all of that stuff.

00:44:34.980 And because I want to know what it is, I think about it every single day.

00:44:38.900 It's important to me.

00:44:41.020 And I didn't always do that.

00:44:42.740 And when I didn't think about that stuff, I was in a, I was not in a good place because I was so fixated on the day-to-day activities, the mundane, monotonous, boring, tedious tasks of life.

00:44:59.000 And there was no purpose or significance behind what I was doing.

00:45:03.080 So I think about it every day and every day I get a little bit better.

00:45:07.040 Sometimes I take a step back because I mess up, but I fix it because I recognize it and try to correct the behavior and think about that new vision and what's going to pull me towards that.

00:45:19.520 That's great.

00:45:20.780 That's great.

00:45:21.880 All right.

00:45:22.300 Another question by Dennis Morris in the Iron Council.

00:45:25.420 He says, something I've been working on since the uprising without much success, without much success.

00:45:30.860 How can someone go from finding satisfaction in external praise to having confidence and satisfaction based off intrinsic factors?

00:45:40.040 In short, I feed off external praise, but I would rather find greater motivation from within myself.

00:45:45.280 I think it's okay to feed off of external praise.

00:45:48.060 I don't think there's anything wrong with that, but if that's exclusively what you're looking for, that could be a problem because that it's external, meaning that you can't control it, right?

00:45:57.460 You can't control when somebody is going to praise you or when they're not.

00:46:00.200 You can't control when somebody is going to like your post or comment on a post on Facebook or not.

00:46:04.680 Those are a lot of things outside of your control.

00:46:07.160 So how do you find this internal confidence and satisfaction?

00:46:12.360 Well, I think that comes back to the previous question, which is vision.

00:46:15.760 What is it that you want?

00:46:16.760 What do you want to accomplish?

00:46:17.620 We talked about a battle plan.

00:46:18.720 Do you have a battle plan?

00:46:20.120 So the first step in the battle plan is creating a vision for yourself.

00:46:22.560 And when I talk about vision, I'm talking about the way that you feel, the way that what you experience in life, the way things happen.

00:46:30.700 Bring you to life, you know, like you're just experiencing it with all of the senses that you have available, smell, touch, hearing all of it.

00:46:38.340 The more clear that you can get in that vision, then you work backwards into objectives.

00:46:42.360 Now that I have this vision, what is it that I want to accomplish?

00:46:44.680 You know, I envision for myself being strong and healthy and capable and that if I ever got into a car accident, that I could handle myself and pull the car hood off my wife.

00:46:54.240 And if there was a natural disaster that I would be able to provide and protect over my family and we would make it through that natural disaster.

00:47:01.500 And then I can go outside and I can jump around on the trampoline with my kids and they'll complain to me about being tired before I even get to that point.

00:47:09.680 Like these are all the things that I envision for my life.

00:47:13.640 Now I have this vision and it's very real for me.

00:47:16.040 It's very tangible.

00:47:17.140 I can actually see what that man looks like.

00:47:19.740 I can see the gray in his beard.

00:47:21.440 I can see his muscles.

00:47:23.900 I can see his energy and his enthusiasm that he's out there bouncing around on the trampoline with his kids.

00:47:29.400 I can see him.

00:47:30.220 And now I work backwards.

00:47:32.600 Who do I need to become to bridge the gap between the man I am today and that man that I envision?

00:47:40.080 And so we get very tangible.

00:47:42.440 Well, I need to be able to run a marathon.

00:47:46.640 I need to be able to deadlift 400 pounds.

00:47:50.520 I need to be able to whatever pick your objective.

00:47:53.800 Okay.

00:47:53.980 Now that's my objective.

00:47:54.920 Let's just say a marathon.

00:47:56.080 90 day objective, run a marathon.

00:47:57.300 Now we work backwards into tactics.

00:48:01.140 What do I need to do over the next 90 days in order to ensure that I can run a marathon in order to ensure that I will reach that vision I have for myself?

00:48:10.260 Well, I probably ought to run every day.

00:48:12.920 I probably ought to cut out the processed sugars.

00:48:15.200 I need to drink a lot of water.

00:48:16.820 I need to get some training, some running coaching and training.

00:48:20.120 These are all things I can do on a daily basis.

00:48:21.580 When I do those things, because I've articulated what it is, when I do those things, I'm intrinsically motivated and uplifted and inspired and satisfied and fulfilled because I've identified what's important and I'm working towards what's important.

00:48:37.780 That's how you take care of yourself by earning it, by doing the work that you've identified as important to you.

00:48:45.340 I think the most discouraging time in a, in a man's life is when he has some sort of vision for himself.

00:48:52.880 And I, every man out there has some sort of vision for the future.

00:48:57.000 The most discouraging time you'll ever find in your life is when you have a vision for your future and you're not doing the work required to achieve that vision.

00:49:07.380 That disparity, that gap between vision and execution poses a very real problem for a lot of men.

00:49:14.740 And it did for me.

00:49:15.700 And that's why I was so discouraged and distraught about life because I wasn't doing what was necessary.

00:49:20.080 And I was just hoping that people would praise me for doing nothing.

00:49:24.120 Yeah.

00:49:24.900 Why would they praise me?

00:49:27.960 There wasn't, there wasn't anything I was doing in order to, to be worthy of that recognition.

00:49:33.140 And so I became right with myself and the praise and recognition takes care of itself, certainly.

00:49:38.580 But I try not to get consumed in that more so than how do I feel about the task I did today?

00:49:43.580 You know what, Ryan, it's, I was thinking when you're saying that, you know, the, I think it's a phrase in the Bible where, where much is given much is required, right?

00:49:51.940 That, that general concept.

00:49:53.280 And it's funny is I've since over the years have applied that to knowledge, meaning where you have gained that vision, where you know what you should be doing as a man.

00:50:07.980 And if that security gap is there, then there's a problem, right?

00:50:13.660 You're not in line with oneself.

00:50:15.680 So what is required for us to act on it?

00:50:18.400 And if we don't act on it, it's going to eat us up because we know what we should be doing and we're not doing it and we're living out of integrity.

00:50:25.940 And so I, where much is required, you know, I think much is required for you to now live into what you've learned to now act upon what, you know, you should be doing.

00:50:36.840 It's great.

00:50:37.460 And, and Dennis, like to Dennis's point, I mean, I think at least for me, the greater motivation within myself is conquering oneself, right?

00:50:48.820 Like accomplishing the things that probably no one knows about, right?

00:50:53.480 Ryan getting that 15 mile run in, right?

00:50:56.900 No one's around praising you going, Oh, Ryan, you got 15.

00:51:00.060 No, you came home and how did you feel?

00:51:02.340 Man, I feel good.

00:51:03.340 I did that, right?

00:51:04.880 And so I think it's those small wins, those silent wins that we have to conquer, uh, whether it's through mental fortitude and grit.

00:51:12.640 And I think that's where that internal self-confidence comes from.

00:51:15.760 I really do.

00:51:16.720 And, and more we have that, the less, I think we need that external praise.

00:51:20.560 At least that's how it is for me.

00:51:22.660 I think that's a hundred percent, right?

00:51:24.040 You just, you aren't consumed and worried about what other people are thinking.

00:51:30.680 You just, you just don't care as much because you're so comfortable with where you are that you're just not consumed with what other people worry about.

00:51:38.540 Yeah.

00:51:39.040 Yeah.

00:51:39.420 All right.

00:51:40.140 Uh, next question, Matt Raghani, how do you, how, how do you best discipline a young son without breaking their spirit?

00:51:50.560 Whew.

00:51:51.240 That's tough.

00:51:52.000 Cause I've actually got one of my sons is a lot like this.

00:51:54.720 Uh, my oldest is a lot like this.

00:51:56.800 He's just kind of happy, go lucky and kind of free and does what he wants when he wants.

00:52:02.200 And then in addition to that, he's very emotionally sensitive.

00:52:06.700 And I'm not even saying that in a bad way.

00:52:08.540 I'm just saying he's very in tune to the way people feel.

00:52:12.760 And I'm not like that, but he is, he's, he's very in tune with that.

00:52:17.260 This person feels this way.

00:52:18.620 This person feels this way.

00:52:19.640 And he's even in tune with himself.

00:52:21.140 I feel this, which makes him quite honestly, sensitive to that sometimes overly sensitive.

00:52:28.100 And so it's a real challenge for me to let him know that he can't be lazy or he can't be shirking his responsibilities.

00:52:35.900 So what I try to do, and look, I'm not the best at this.

00:52:38.540 I'm not, I'm not the dad expert.

00:52:40.400 All right.

00:52:40.980 What I try to do though, is tie his act, his actions to a consequence, both positive and negative.

00:52:50.440 So when he slacks off and he dinks around, then he doesn't get to achieve what it is that he wants to achieve.

00:52:57.580 And I show him that, and I illustrate that.

00:52:59.720 And I take things away from him when he doesn't do what he's supposed to do, because he needs to understand that there's a, there's a connect between the choices you make and the consequences that follow.

00:53:09.180 And I positively reinforce that as well.

00:53:12.100 When he does what he needs to be doing and he does it right, then he is rewarded naturally for the things that he does.

00:53:19.280 And the more that you can make that connection, the better off you're going to be.

00:53:21.840 The other thing is let him experience it in a way that's meaningful and significant to him.

00:53:27.480 So I had this conversation with my wife.

00:53:29.560 In fact, I talked about this with Jocko as well.

00:53:31.840 A couple of weeks ago, my wife really wanted to have my kids involved in piano. 0.99

00:53:37.000 And my, my sons just rejected it.

00:53:41.440 Not like they didn't like it, but they despised it.

00:53:45.860 And I asked my wife, I said, what, what are we trying to accomplish here?

00:53:49.560 Like, what is the point?

00:53:50.760 Cause music's not a thing for me.

00:53:52.340 It is for her and her family.

00:53:53.880 It's not for me.

00:53:54.780 I just said, what's the point?

00:53:56.180 She says, well, I want them to be artistic and I want them to understand why they should practice things.

00:54:01.880 And I want them to, like, I want them to, to understand how music works and tap into that creative side of their brain.

00:54:08.840 I said, oh, that all sounds really good to me.

00:54:11.120 That makes a hundred percent sense.

00:54:13.660 Is this the only way to do it?

00:54:16.540 And we came to the conclusion that it's not.

00:54:18.460 My oldest son wants to play the guitar.

00:54:19.940 I'm like, so what's the difference?

00:54:21.020 You know, if he's going to be engaged in this, why not let him do it?

00:54:23.940 It's going to meet the objective.

00:54:26.080 And we're not going to have to bang our heads or his head against the wall to get him to piano.

00:54:30.480 So that's what we're, that's what we're in the process of doing.

00:54:33.320 Now there's going to be days he doesn't want to play, but he is able to see now because it's something that's actually meaningful and significant to him.

00:54:39.480 If you're just talking about, you've got to be disciplined and do your homework.

00:54:42.680 You've got to be disciplined about making your bed.

00:54:45.800 What kid in their right mind is ever going to want to be disciplined about that?

00:54:50.320 Yeah.

00:54:50.640 But if you do it in a way that's significant and meaningful, hey, you've got to be disciplined in football.

00:54:55.080 Because you enjoy football and you enjoy winning and you want to be better and you want to be part of the brotherhood.

00:54:59.440 Then here's what the members of the brotherhood do.

00:55:02.800 This is my oldest son.

00:55:03.720 He talked to, he came home a couple of weeks ago and he's like, dad, I really like football.

00:55:06.860 I said, great.

00:55:07.300 What do you like about it?

00:55:08.080 He's like, well, I like football.

00:55:09.000 I like hitting people and I like learning the plays and I like the, I like winning.

00:55:12.040 I like the game, but I like the brotherhood.

00:55:14.060 That's what he said.

00:55:15.120 I like the brotherhood.

00:55:16.080 It's like, it's like we're family.

00:55:18.220 And, and so now I know that's what motivates him.

00:55:21.320 So I can talk to him in a context of saying, Hey, if you want to be part of the brotherhood, you have to live by the code of the brotherhood.

00:55:28.840 And the code of the brotherhood is that you show up to practice and you work hard and you play hard and you learn your assignments and you do your assignments and you take care of the team and you sacrifice what you want for the betterment of the team.

00:55:39.740 That's the code of the brotherhood.

00:55:41.940 So if you want to be part of it, you better live by the code, AKA discipline.

00:55:47.160 And he gets that.

00:55:48.100 He understands that because he wants the benefit of being part of the brotherhood.

00:55:53.100 Do it in a way that's meaningful and significant to him or her.

00:55:56.960 I don't know if that was a son or daughter.

00:55:58.420 I don't know.

00:55:59.360 A son.

00:55:59.900 He mentioned son.

00:56:00.580 Yeah.

00:56:00.780 You got it.

00:56:02.220 All right.

00:56:02.800 Andrew Langston, not so much a question, just a clarification on the whole Megatron conversation.

00:56:09.740 You guys will have to go back.

00:56:12.280 Was it number five or four we talked about Megatron for the first time?

00:56:17.000 I think this is going to be a thread that just runs through the podcast.

00:56:20.300 Yeah.

00:56:20.680 Yeah.

00:56:21.100 But he did clarify Megatron does turn into a handgun in the 80s cartoons.

00:56:27.680 But the gun could fly.

00:56:29.300 I don't – it's weird.

00:56:31.260 So Andrew, thanks for the clarification.

00:56:33.140 A flying gun is what Megatron – and I guess in the newer movies he turned into something else.

00:56:38.440 So we're partially right.

00:56:40.800 We got some of it right regarding Megatron.

00:56:42.920 All right.

00:56:43.920 Next question.

00:56:44.940 Scott Torshik.

00:56:46.580 Any suggestions on a solid strength and conditioning program for martial arts?

00:56:52.280 Well, I use CrossFit.

00:56:54.500 That's a good – I wouldn't say that's necessarily like a strength program.

00:56:58.600 A conditioning for sure.

00:57:00.600 Starting Strength has some great programs.

00:57:03.320 I use – Josiah Novak.

00:57:06.720 A lot of you guys are familiar with him.

00:57:07.940 True Transformation.

00:57:08.920 He's my strength coach.

00:57:11.060 Well, there's a lot out there.

00:57:12.220 I don't know if there's one specifically for martial arts.

00:57:14.440 But anything is going to help you.

00:57:16.020 If you're more conditioned and stronger, that's going to enhance your game.

00:57:22.060 So I don't think there's one that's like designed for – or I guess the other thing would be martial arts.

00:57:28.000 Any suggestions on conditioning program for martial arts?

00:57:31.680 More martial arts.

00:57:33.400 For sure.

00:57:34.020 But that's what I do.

00:57:35.060 What would you add, Kip, to that?

00:57:36.840 I would add – I mean I think the fact that he said strength and conditioning programs is key because that's what you want.

00:57:42.960 Strength and conditioning programs, right?

00:57:44.500 You don't want to do bodybuilding movements mostly just because you're going to lose flexibility.

00:57:48.120 And James Gardner, one of my coaches, it's funny is he mentioned once to me that you get big guys, right, that are kind of shredded, huge muscle guys coming into the gym.

00:57:59.720 And we fail to realize that with all that muscle, you don't get bigger organs.

00:58:05.980 Good point.

00:58:06.900 And so you may be stronger.

00:58:08.620 You may have huge muscles.

00:58:09.920 But guess what?

00:58:10.400 Your heart is working overtime, right, to pump blood to all those muscles.

00:58:15.660 And so I think martial arts kind of exposes the need for your optimum performance, for your height, for your genetics, you know what I mean, and everything.

00:58:27.880 And so I think the more – the stronger you can be but maintain leanness and well-conditioned, the better.

00:58:35.060 And both strength and conditioning programs do that very thing.

00:58:39.200 That's the point, right?

00:58:40.180 I mean I see these guys who are bodybuilders, and while I appreciate their discipline and their dedication to their craft, I wonder how practical it really is.

00:58:49.240 Oh, dude.

00:58:49.540 Those are the best guys to shoulder lock.

00:58:52.080 Because they don't – they can't move.

00:58:53.840 Dude, yeah.

00:58:54.380 You grab their arm and you just barely put on a Kimura or Americana and they're tapping instantly, right, because their joints, they have no – they have limited movement, right?

00:59:04.960 And so a lot of those guys you can – now, don't get me wrong, we're probably going to get someone to argue here immediately based upon what we're going to say, saying, no, you can be flexible.

00:59:13.280 I'm just generalizing most guys, right?

00:59:16.080 And I'm the same way.

00:59:17.140 If I lift heavy and I do kind of muscle-building exercises and I go to the gym, dude, I don't have as much movement, right?

00:59:24.200 You have to work extra hard to keep some flexibility to you.

00:59:27.460 And you just – it's individual.

00:59:29.180 You got to figure out what's right for you.

00:59:30.500 I like that you said your individual body type.

00:59:32.520 I mean you and me, for example, were different builds.

00:59:34.500 I think – how tall are you?

00:59:36.060 Six-one.

00:59:37.120 Okay.

00:59:37.540 Are you really six-one?

00:59:38.740 Yeah.

00:59:39.240 Yeah.

00:59:39.480 So you're a lot taller than I am, but you're leaner than I am too.

00:59:44.720 So I'm shorter.

00:59:46.500 I'm definitely stronger than you.

00:59:48.820 So I'm just kidding.

00:59:50.160 I think you are.

00:59:51.080 I don't know.

00:59:52.560 I'm shorter, but I'm just – I'm broader in the shoulders and arms.

00:59:56.740 And you just have to figure out what's for you, right?

01:00:00.200 Your specific conditioning, your specific strength, and then build a martial arts style around you and then continue to get better and evolve and grow.

01:00:11.360 And you and I will probably never move the same.

01:00:15.460 Yeah.

01:00:15.580 And it's just the way it is, and you have strengths and weaknesses, and I have strengths and weaknesses, and we just figure out what's best for us.

01:00:23.000 Yeah.

01:00:23.620 Just – Scott, if worst case scenario, you can't think of anything, get the Devil's Tricycle.

01:00:30.120 What is that?

01:00:31.220 The Devil's Tricycle is an airdyne machine. 1.00

01:00:34.040 Oh, is that – yes.

01:00:35.240 Oh, yes.

01:00:36.440 Man.

01:00:36.900 Brutal, man.

01:00:37.680 The most brutal.

01:00:38.580 Brutal.

01:00:39.200 And those assault bikes too are brutal as well.

01:00:42.500 Yeah.

01:00:42.920 Is that the same thing?

01:00:44.220 Yeah.

01:00:44.620 I've had a – I had a workout on airdyne.

01:00:46.920 No joke.

01:00:47.840 I had to lay down, and I couldn't leave the gym.

01:00:52.660 I couldn't shower because I thought I was going to faint and die.

01:00:56.380 I had to literally lay there for like 30 minutes to recover my body.

01:01:00.140 That's good, man.

01:01:00.820 I had somebody the other day, I posted a picture of me on the rower, and somebody's like,

01:01:05.680 I've never got a good workout from the rower.

01:01:07.740 Oh, dude.

01:01:08.540 I'm like, what?

01:01:09.940 I was like, go harder.

01:01:11.400 Go longer. 1.00

01:01:12.440 Like, you don't need a whole lot to kick your ass. 1.00

01:01:15.320 Yeah. 0.99

01:01:15.780 And the way those – a lot of those exercises work is like you're supposed to maintain a pace on that row, right, for a period of time, right?

01:01:23.660 If you go on there, you just bang out 10 hard rows, and you're like, man, that wasn't that hard.

01:01:28.100 No, it's about longevity and maintaining momentum, right?

01:01:31.580 There's a guy on Instagram, and while we're talking here, I'll find him, but he works out basically in the park.

01:01:38.220 And the guy's physique is incredible, but he just does like crazy stuff in the park.

01:01:41.860 Like, he'll be in the park, and he picks up big boulders, and he shoulders them and runs for 200 meters, and then he climbs a tree or whatever.

01:01:50.100 Like, you don't need a whole lot to move your body and give yourself a workout.

01:01:54.840 Yeah.

01:01:55.500 No, not at all.

01:01:56.800 Let's take a couple more. 0.62

01:01:58.580 Okay.

01:01:58.980 There was one question that I did see that I really wanted to answer because it was a good question and one that had been on my mind.

01:02:04.840 And I can't remember exactly what it is, but it was something along the lines of how do you reconcile science and faith?

01:02:11.920 It was something along those lines.

01:02:13.300 I wanted to answer that question, but maybe there's another one too.

01:02:15.540 Yeah, that was Moose.

01:02:16.480 That was Moose.

01:02:17.180 Was it?

01:02:17.540 Okay.

01:02:17.820 In my council as well.

01:02:18.520 Yeah.

01:02:18.760 Cool.

01:02:18.900 I see it here.

01:02:19.640 So do you ever have any trouble reconciling science and religion slash spirituality?

01:02:24.480 Yes.

01:02:26.120 The answer is yes.

01:02:27.740 I do have that occasionally.

01:02:29.860 And because I'm a logical person and I think the way that I think sometimes it's difficult for me to rely upon faith.

01:02:38.280 And if you look at what faith is, faith is in believing in something that you don't have physical or tangible evidence in, in which to believe.

01:02:46.060 That's a very difficult thing for a left brain oriented analytic type person to wrap their head around.

01:02:52.660 And there's other people who are like, I don't need to know.

01:02:56.100 I just feel like this is right.

01:02:57.940 And that's enough.

01:02:59.620 So I have been at odds at times.

01:03:02.000 And here's what I've come to the conclusion that it doesn't have to be either or.

01:03:07.660 It doesn't have to be one or the other.

01:03:10.640 It's not that either God exists or science is the solution.

01:03:15.400 It could be frankly that God has used science and that he operates under a set of principles and parameters that we understand and we know.

01:03:26.440 And he's used those scientific formulas and principles and laws to rule the world and the universe.

01:03:38.720 I don't have all the answers.

01:03:40.260 That's just what I feel is the case is that they aren't at odds with each other.

01:03:45.260 In fact, I believe they complement each other.

01:03:47.360 And so I was looking into this because I had a lot of these questions.

01:03:49.560 And here's why I wanted to answer this question.

01:03:51.480 Because I was looking into this, trying to come up with my own answers and figure out how I can find the middle ground, the common ground.

01:03:59.020 Because I believe in science, of course.

01:04:00.840 I believe in God as well.

01:04:02.840 And there's a great book.

01:04:04.280 And that book was written in 1991.

01:04:06.400 It's called Genesis and the Big Bang.

01:04:08.860 And the subtitle is The Discovery of Harmony Between Modern Science and the Bible.

01:04:14.520 It's by Gerald Schroeder.

01:04:16.580 So it's called, again, Genesis and the Big Bang, The Discovery of Harmony Between Modern Science and the Bible.

01:04:20.920 And I'm about 25% to 30% of the way through the book.

01:04:24.560 And this guy, if I understand correctly, and I might be wrong, so don't quote me on this, is a physicist.

01:04:29.620 And he understands the laws of science very, very well.

01:04:33.100 But he's also a man of faith.

01:04:36.100 And so he is able to articulate how there's harmony between the stories in the Bible and what science teaches us.

01:04:44.360 It's a really good book.

01:04:45.980 It's cool.

01:04:47.200 It's cool.

01:04:47.760 I just know that's on a lot of people's minds.

01:04:49.340 So I wanted to make sure that we answered that question.

01:04:51.740 Yeah.

01:04:51.980 And I love what you said.

01:04:53.100 You don't have all the answers.

01:04:54.100 And part of that dichotomy, right, between science and spirituality or religion is the fact that we don't have all the answers.

01:05:02.500 Like, how many times have we heard science say one thing and then, oh, wait, actually, we're a little bit wrong on that one.

01:05:07.560 Yeah, true.

01:05:08.200 So, I mean, this is part of the process, I think.

01:05:10.700 I think it's just a natural order of man for us to try to explain and understand things.

01:05:15.120 I don't necessarily think they're in conflict.

01:05:17.840 Cool.

01:05:18.100 I agree with you, man.

01:05:18.440 So we have one more question?

01:05:20.180 Yeah, let's do one more.

01:05:21.320 Okay.

01:05:21.700 I purposely, since you picked out moves, man, I kind of felt like I wanted to pick out one.

01:05:26.640 So Robert Thompson had a great question.

01:05:28.440 I think it's a good way to wrap up the call.

01:05:31.180 His question is, in my journey since joining the Iron Council and Order of Man, after all the positive changes I've made on my own, in my own life, and seeing others among us do the same,

01:05:41.020 is it wrong that I feel disdain for the average person in society or society in general for not seeing the value of striving to be the best version of oneself as possible?

01:05:52.660 That's a good question.

01:05:53.780 Very simply, yes.

01:05:56.300 I believe that's wrong.

01:05:58.600 And I believe it's wrong to think poorly about another individual for the choices they make in their own lives that don't have anything to do with you.

01:06:06.900 Would you say, though, Ryan, that this is a little bit of, like, a problem that shows up for us, right?

01:06:14.760 Like, when you're focused on trying to become a better person, like, not that the natural man is a good thing here, right?

01:06:22.840 But I think it's very natural, right, for Robert to kind of start feeling this way, even though it may not be what we should be doing.

01:06:28.980 Oh, look, man.

01:06:29.860 Just because I said it's wrong doesn't mean that I don't fall into that trap.

01:06:33.480 Yeah.

01:06:33.900 Because it's tough.

01:06:34.820 It is tough.

01:06:35.400 I do it all the time because my job is to lift men up.

01:06:38.680 So when I see men who aren't interested in being lifted up, I'm like, what the hell's wrong with you?

01:06:42.980 Yeah.

01:06:43.400 Why don't you want to do this?

01:06:44.360 Why don't you want to improve your life?

01:06:46.900 And I wish they would, but for whatever reason, and I don't know, I don't know what the reason is.

01:06:52.240 I don't know their story.

01:06:53.160 I don't know what's going on in their background or their belief system or even their life to give me the ability or permission, I guess maybe is the better word, to judge what that individual is doing.

01:07:08.140 I fall into that trap.

01:07:09.280 I do.

01:07:10.080 And the way that I overcome that trap is very simply telling myself, I don't know that guy's deal.

01:07:15.120 I don't know.

01:07:16.140 I don't know what he's dealing with.

01:07:17.500 I don't know where he's at.

01:07:18.680 I don't know what his struggles are.

01:07:20.060 I don't know where he's good.

01:07:21.040 Um, I will say that one thing I do try to look at is the positive in everybody.

01:07:25.020 I really do. 1.00

01:07:25.960 I try to look at individuals, even individuals that on surface level, I'm like, this guy's an a-hole or he's an idiot or whatever. 1.00

01:07:33.560 What can I learn from him? 1.00

01:07:35.860 What is, what is, what about him can I extract that would be positive?

01:07:40.900 What are the positive characteristics and qualities of this individual?

01:07:44.540 Cause, cause even people that, that are complete a-holes to you still have those things.

01:07:48.980 And you can choose what you focus on.

01:07:51.500 Now, in the meantime, just focus on ourselves, right?

01:07:55.120 Like I don't have to worry about Kip, what you do.

01:07:57.260 It does because you, what you do doesn't affect me.

01:08:00.880 So all I have to do is worry about me.

01:08:02.940 And I tell, I tell my, uh, my oldest son this all the time.

01:08:05.820 Cause he has a tendency to like, to tattletale and to like get his nose in other people's business.

01:08:10.260 And I say, don't get yourself into other people's trouble.

01:08:14.520 Don't get yourself in other people's trouble.

01:08:16.080 Look, people will, will bury themselves.

01:08:18.980 There's nothing you need to do in order to get yourself buried as well.

01:08:23.720 Just stay out of it unless it affects you or yours.

01:08:27.280 It's okay.

01:08:28.520 It's, it's really okay that not every man listens to the order man podcast.

01:08:33.700 It's really okay that not every man is interested in improving to the degree that I am.

01:08:39.820 And a lot of our listeners are it's okay because we can focus on the ones that do.

01:08:44.540 And that's good too.

01:08:46.340 And it's super easy, right?

01:08:47.680 It's so easy to make them wrong.

01:08:49.860 But I, but I think there's huge power in having empathy, right?

01:08:53.720 To your point, Ryan, I don't know their story, right?

01:08:56.180 We don't know what they've dealt with.

01:08:58.460 We don't know what troubles they've had to deal with as, as children or how they are raised or the conditions in which they were brought up.

01:09:05.080 Like we don't know those things, if anything, and it, and I kind of reiterates that the phrase we use in iron council a lot of just being a lighthouse, right?

01:09:13.500 Sometimes, you know, we use this, the tugboat lighthouse mentality.

01:09:17.620 The problem with the tugboat is obviously you can't change people.

01:09:20.980 But the other problem is it implies that they're wrong, that you need to change them.

01:09:26.680 And if they don't, then like something's wrong with the scenario.

01:09:30.020 Like guys, I mean, I would assume like the way you change is by being a lighthouse and, and, and making things possible, right?

01:09:38.600 Create possibilities for others to see a way of being right.

01:09:42.440 Based upon the way you're acting.

01:09:44.320 And if they don't accept it or they don't change, we can't make people wrong for it.

01:09:48.040 Otherwise we'd just be running around getting pissed off at everybody.

01:09:50.440 Right.

01:09:51.300 And I'm also very cautious too, Kip, of giving specific unsolicited advice.

01:09:55.880 Now, what we are sharing here today could be construed as unsolicited, but not really because people are listening to the podcast.

01:10:01.600 They know what they're going to get.

01:10:02.960 Yeah.

01:10:03.440 But I am very careful of looking at another man's scenario and just reaching out to that individual and saying, Hey, I noticed this, you got to fix this because that's not, it's not solicited.

01:10:13.920 That's, it's never a good idea to give unsolicited advice.

01:10:16.380 Now, if somebody comes to me, whether it's through listening to this podcast or joining the iron council or being in our Facebook group or messaging me directly for advice, they are now soliciting my feedback.

01:10:27.720 And in that opportunity, I have a moment, a chance to say, Hey, you know what?

01:10:32.780 Like, here's one thing that I recognize one guy in particular.

01:10:35.220 I remember his name is John Gilliland.

01:10:37.160 I had a picture come up on Facebook this morning, a two-year memory.

01:10:39.780 And, and it was a picture of me and him and 18 other guys at the initial uprising.

01:10:45.180 The very first one, we called ourselves the terrible 20, in fact, and I saw him and, and it triggered a memory.

01:10:53.380 And that memory was two years ago at the uprising.

01:10:55.360 He came out there and he was in a dark place, man, a really, really dark place two years ago.

01:11:01.140 And he came up to me about two, three days into the event.

01:11:03.480 And he said, Hey man, can I get some feedback from you?

01:11:06.140 I said, yeah, you bet.

01:11:06.820 And he says, I just want to know what, how you perceive me.

01:11:11.980 Like, how do you, like when you first see me, he's like, I know you don't know me well, but when you first see me, like, what is your first perception?

01:11:17.980 What is your perception of me this weekend?

01:11:21.020 That's a hard, that's a hard question that he wants an answer to.

01:11:24.580 And he wants a genuine answer, but he solicited it.

01:11:27.300 And so I shared, I said, here's the things that I recognize in you over the past 48 hours that are, that are positive, that I admire, that I respect about you.

01:11:34.400 And here's some things that I see where potentially you're, you're falling short based on my limited perception.

01:11:39.040 He took that stuff to heart, man.

01:11:42.180 And over the past, and not just my advice, but he asked a handful of other guys there too.

01:11:46.320 And over the past two years has transformed his life, completely transformed his life.

01:11:51.520 And it's pretty cool and inspiring to watch his journey and his change, but he was ready.

01:11:57.540 He was ready.

01:11:59.720 Six months earlier.

01:12:00.900 I don't know if he would have been ready.

01:12:02.000 There was a time in my life where I wouldn't have been ready to receive the information that we're sharing through this podcast and movement.

01:12:09.160 So don't, don't, don't assume that, you know, what somebody is going through and don't assume they're ready to hear what you have to share.

01:12:15.500 Just work on serving yourself and the people who are requesting your help.

01:12:19.160 And, uh, I think you will fall prey to this trap less often.

01:12:22.680 And again, this is not judging even Robert.

01:12:24.600 We all fall into this trap.

01:12:25.760 It's a natural trap to fall into that, to judge other people.

01:12:28.800 And quite frankly, it's, it's in a lot of ways, it's good because it's kept us banded with the right people and attracted to the right people and kept us safe in a lot of ways too.

01:12:37.660 It's just a border that you are a line that you need to be very, very careful of not crossing.

01:12:42.260 Yeah.

01:12:42.800 I love that.

01:12:43.680 I love the, I love the advice of not assuming that they're ready.

01:12:48.960 I really like that.

01:12:50.340 I haven't heard that.

01:12:51.280 Yeah.

01:12:51.780 Yeah.

01:12:52.020 I mean, just everybody's in a different place.

01:12:53.780 And you know what, even if you shared advice that would greatly benefit and enhance their life, if they're not ready, it doesn't matter.

01:13:02.780 I had a trainer when I was in the financial services industry.

01:13:05.160 And he said, he said, Ryan, you can't say the right thing to the wrong person.

01:13:09.520 You can't say the right thing to the wrong person.

01:13:11.600 And I'm not saying that individual is wrong or bad or anything else.

01:13:15.440 All I'm saying is that if an individual isn't ready, there's no phrase, there's no word, there's no analogy or metaphor or parable that you could use that would enhance their life.

01:13:27.200 Wait till they're ready.

01:13:28.260 And you'll know when they're ready because they approach you and they want to learn and be inspired by you.

01:13:33.220 And then they've given you permission to share with them what you know.

01:13:37.320 Yeah.

01:13:38.360 Cool.

01:13:39.000 Should we call it a day?

01:13:40.460 I think we should.

01:13:41.660 Man, we had a lot of good questions.

01:13:42.880 We didn't have very, I don't know.

01:13:44.000 Did we have any funny one?

01:13:45.040 Like we didn't even have any comical ones.

01:13:47.240 I know.

01:13:47.440 Yeah.

01:13:47.840 I know there was one about cargo shorts.

01:13:49.860 We ought to address that next time.

01:13:51.680 We'll definitely.

01:13:52.540 And he, what does he call them?

01:13:53.520 Purse shorts or purse pants or something.

01:13:55.380 I can't remember.

01:13:56.040 Purse pants.

01:13:56.420 Purse pants.

01:13:57.840 So we'll definitely cover that.

01:13:59.460 Oh, and flat, flat bill hats.

01:14:01.440 He doesn't like my flat bill hats.

01:14:03.440 And loud shorts.

01:14:04.660 And loud.

01:14:05.280 Oh, that's right.

01:14:05.920 Because I had that picture the other day of me and my pineapple swimsuit.

01:14:09.640 Like I was shooting my bow and I was in a pineapple swimsuit from those chubbies. 1.00

01:14:14.360 Have you seen those?

01:14:15.440 Those are awesome, man.

01:14:16.580 Yeah, I did see those.

01:14:17.500 I saw those in origin.

01:14:18.980 Yeah.

01:14:19.460 So, and Bubba even threw out some hashtags.

01:14:22.240 Don't deny science and a bunch of other stuff.

01:14:24.200 So he's, he's, he's bringing up some, some backing of science.

01:14:27.820 I'm looking at these.

01:14:29.580 Hold on.

01:14:30.420 No, we got to share these.

01:14:32.180 Don't.

01:14:32.460 Okay.

01:14:32.900 Just share.

01:14:33.480 Okay.

01:14:33.760 Just share the question.

01:14:34.960 We'll answer it next time.

01:14:36.240 And then share the hashtags.

01:14:38.080 Which one?

01:14:38.700 Bubba's?

01:14:39.200 Yes.

01:14:39.600 Okay.

01:14:40.420 So Bubba Downs question was why loud shorts and flat bill hats are acceptable in manly

01:14:46.420 society.

01:14:47.400 Is it the beard?

01:14:49.220 Do you have, do you have to have a beard to pull that look off or could they do it with

01:14:54.660 a clean shaven baron profile?

01:14:56.740 Hashtag don't deny science.

01:14:58.840 Hashtag pineapple doesn't belong on peepees.

01:15:02.780 And hashtag baron bros don't get as much slack.

01:15:07.380 Oh my gosh.

01:15:08.180 All right.

01:15:09.020 I'm not going to answer that right now, but Hey, we just wanted to give you a taste of

01:15:12.400 what's to come next week, guys.

01:15:13.840 Yeah.

01:15:14.000 Real serious stuff.

01:15:15.380 Pineapple pants on peepees, whatever.

01:15:18.840 Oh, I got to love those guys.

01:15:20.320 Andy and Bubba.

01:15:21.020 Good guys.

01:15:21.620 Good guys.

01:15:22.180 Bubba is a member of Patreon and the iron council.

01:15:25.500 Sam, Sam Stoddard is also a member of Patreon.

01:15:28.680 And so I appreciate you guys supporting what it is we're doing.

01:15:31.760 Yeah.

01:15:31.920 If you guys want to join Bubba, go to patreon.com forward slash order of man.

01:15:37.040 Um, as well as you guys can look up the iron council and join the other brothers there,

01:15:42.260 roughly 450, almost 500 men, uh, meeting weekly, discussing these particular topics, discussing

01:15:50.420 battle plans.

01:15:50.920 We talked about that a little bit today on what that, you know, generally looks like,

01:15:55.480 um, and leveling up guys and, and having the tough and real conversations and, and holding

01:16:01.460 each other accountable.

01:16:02.240 And it's just, man, I just, I cannot get over the change, right?

01:16:07.200 I mean, you, you brought John Gilliland as an example, right?

01:16:09.920 He's not the only guy in the iron council that has had major strides.

01:16:13.480 And so it's, it's just a, it's a really great community.

01:16:17.100 And like we said to Kip, uh, there's got, frankly, there's guys who join the iron council

01:16:22.500 also who do nothing.

01:16:24.220 Yeah, for sure.

01:16:25.200 And they leave and they, you know, they, they invest a little bit of money over the course

01:16:29.260 of two or three months and they leave and they're like, well, I didn't get anything from that.

01:16:32.460 And it's, it's because they weren't ready or, or they just, or whatever.

01:16:36.680 Um, you, I'm, I'm, I just want to tell you that the iron council, this brotherhood is not

01:16:41.320 the end all save all.

01:16:42.060 If you join us inside of the iron council, you're not going to be the next guy that we

01:16:46.360 talk about on this podcast.

01:16:48.740 That's changed your life.

01:16:50.000 Unless you do the work.

01:16:52.000 Totally.

01:16:52.560 You have, we have the framework.

01:16:54.540 We have a foundation.

01:16:55.880 We have some systems and some tools and resources in place.

01:16:59.140 We have some great team later leaders on the call, Kip being one of them.

01:17:02.580 We have some great people over there and some great opportunities, but opportunities are

01:17:07.080 only so powerful as your willingness to engage.

01:17:10.680 And so it's, it's not the end all save all.

01:17:12.920 And, and a lot of people won't talk like that.

01:17:14.840 A lot of people say, Oh, join our thing.

01:17:16.820 And you'll in 90 days, you'll be rich and handsome and get all the women and everything.

01:17:21.600 Your wildest dreams will come true, but they won't not even with the iron council, if you

01:17:28.080 aren't willing to put in the work.

01:17:29.120 So we're looking for guys who want to work, who want to improve, and we'll give you the

01:17:32.360 foundation and you run with it and make what you can of it.

01:17:35.960 Yep.

01:17:36.600 Love it.

01:17:37.960 Before we wrap up, you can connect with Ryan Mickler at Instagram at Ryan Mickler and Twitter

01:17:43.440 at order of man.

01:17:44.680 Cool.

01:17:45.220 And, uh, what else, man?

01:17:46.580 Is there anything else?

01:17:47.620 Facebook order group?

01:17:48.500 Yeah.

01:17:48.660 Facebook.

01:17:49.040 We've got some, uh, new merch coming in to the store here in the next little while.

01:17:53.500 A couple of new shirts, uh, beanies, hoodies, that sort of things coming online here pretty

01:17:58.260 quick.

01:17:58.900 Um, so be on the lookout in the, uh, in the store order, man, store.

01:18:02.940 Uh, but other than that, just glad the guys are here.

01:18:05.520 Yeah.

01:18:06.480 Awesome.

01:18:06.920 Should we wrap it up?

01:18:08.240 Yes, sir.

01:18:08.960 All right, guys.

01:18:09.480 Well, as we always do appreciate you glad to be on this journey with you.

01:18:12.620 Um, man, these calls are good.

01:18:14.360 I hope you like the format.

01:18:15.500 I hope you like the structure.

01:18:16.300 We'd love to hear some feedback.

01:18:17.560 Let us know.

01:18:18.360 Um, take it easy on Kip.

01:18:20.340 I know you guys are going to probably want to beat him up a little bit.

01:18:22.160 He's got, he's got some room for improvement.

01:18:24.300 So just take it easy on him.

01:18:26.560 Um, don't give him any unsolicited feedback.

01:18:28.580 He doesn't take that well.

01:18:30.460 And, uh, I'm just Kip.

01:18:32.240 I got to tell you, man, in all seriousness, I do appreciate you.

01:18:35.000 You do a wonderful job.

01:18:36.780 Um, I get a lot of questions and comments about your enhancement to what we're doing here

01:18:42.120 in the podcast.

01:18:42.520 So I want you to know that I do appreciate you, man.

01:18:45.260 I'm glad to be on the ride.

01:18:46.880 That I really am.

01:18:47.640 Cool.

01:18:48.380 All right, guys, we'll get going until next week.

01:18:50.500 Take action and become the man you are meant to be.

01:18:53.360 Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast.

01:18:56.160 You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be.

01:19:00.280 We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.

01:19:03.400 We'll be right back.

01:19:09.160 We'll be right back.

01:19:09.200 We'll be right back.

Order of Man - September 19, 2018

Taking Risks, Bridging the Gap Between Science and Spirituality, and Instilling Discipline in Children｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

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