Order of Man - Tapping Into Your Warrior Archetype

00:00:00.000 Warrior is a term that gets thrown around a lot these days. Most men have the desire to some

00:00:04.320 degree to develop and hone their warrior spirit. And despite the fact that many men have never

00:00:09.240 considered themselves warriors or served in the military, it is possible and even advantageous to

00:00:15.480 approach your life in very much the same way a warrior approaches his. Today, I'm joined by

00:00:20.700 Marine Corps veteran and entrepreneur, Chris Albert, to discuss exactly what it means to be

00:00:25.580 a warrior. We discuss how to lead yourself when no one is telling you what to do, what it means to

00:00:31.400 slay dragons and make yourself capable of doing so, improving your internal dialogue, and ultimately

00:00:37.840 how to tap into the warrior archetype. You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest,

00:00:43.120 embrace your fears, and boldly chart your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up

00:00:48.300 one more time, every time. You are not easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong.

00:00:55.580 This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day,

00:01:00.980 and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.

00:01:05.120 Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Mickler, and I am the host and the founder

00:01:09.260 of the podcast and the movement that is known as Order of Man. I want to welcome you, whether you're

00:01:14.280 joining us for the first time or been with us for almost five years now. We are actually on track

00:01:20.540 as of this month to have our highest downloaded month ever with regards to this podcast. And I

00:01:27.580 want to thank you for helping grow the mission. I want to encourage you to continue to grow the

00:01:31.360 mission by sharing this episode, sharing the movement, just sharing what it is we're doing

00:01:35.880 and leaving us a rating review. If you've ever gotten any value out of the podcast and the

00:01:39.780 conversations we're having, then please leave us a rating and review. Now, if you are joining us for

00:01:43.720 the first time, please let me tell you that this is a movement to reclaim and restore manhood. Every

00:01:51.420 single day, I'm getting messages and links to articles and videos and different resources that

00:01:58.320 are dismissing and undermining what it means to be a man and attempting to redefine it. It is my goal to

00:02:03.980 reestablish what it means to be a man and then give you the tools, the guidance, the resource,

00:02:09.400 the direction, and through this podcast, the conversations you need to become the man you're

00:02:13.560 capable of becoming. Frankly, it's my goal to enlist millions and millions of men across the

00:02:19.560 planet who are strong and bold and assertive and capable. They're leading their families. They're

00:02:25.840 serving in their communities. They're growing their businesses. They're leading themselves ultimately,

00:02:29.640 and they are becoming the men they have a desire to be and the men the world needs them to be.

00:02:35.480 So again, glad you're here. We're going to get into this one pretty quick. I do want to make a very

00:02:40.460 quick mention of my friends and show sponsors. Now, guys, I'm not hawking a bunch of products to

00:02:45.140 you. You know that if you've been around for any amount of time, I'm not going to sell you a bunch

00:02:48.980 of underwear or mattresses or business development software. If anything, I'm going to share a few

00:02:55.940 things that I believe in a few things that I personally use. And one of those is my friends over at

00:03:02.360 origin. Now they just moved into their new boot facility. So they've grown, they've expanded,

00:03:08.820 they continue to expand and they will continue to expand. But I went over last week and checked out

00:03:13.960 their new facility where they're housing, all of their boot making equipment. And I got to tell you,

00:03:18.760 the operation is pretty, pretty incredible to, to see and check out. And I'm so excited about what

00:03:24.400 these guys are doing. If you are in the market for a new pair of boots, or even if you're not in the

00:03:28.060 market, you should be because these are a hundred percent sourced and made in America boots.

00:03:32.820 I personally own the bison boots. I've worn them so much. I already had to have them resold,

00:03:37.940 which they're in the process of getting resold right now. Cause everything is holding up very,

00:03:41.480 very well. I just pound them into the ground. Cause I wanted to put them to work and I guarantee

00:03:45.700 they will do wonders for you as well. So if you're interested in boots or denim or geese or rash guards

00:03:51.580 or their nutritional lineup that is partnered up with Jocko, then head to origin, Maine as in the state,

00:03:57.300 Maine origin, Maine.com and use the code order or D E R at checkout. Make sure you use the code order

00:04:03.380 two things. They're going to know where you came from the order of man podcast, and you're going to

00:04:07.400 get a discount by doing so again, origin, Maine.com use the code order. All right, guys, let's get into

00:04:14.240 the introduction today. This is my friend and a Marine Corps veteran. He's the founder of warrior soul.

00:04:21.320 His name is Chris Albert. We met several years ago and I've been really inspired by what this gentleman

00:04:26.020 is doing and the good work he's doing, not only in the veteran community, but helping individuals

00:04:30.320 and businesses as well. Uh, after leaving the military, the Marine Corps, Chris went into body

00:04:35.440 building. Uh, eventually he was a co-owner in one of the most well-known gyms in the world. Metro flex

00:04:41.220 gym. Uh, he was training and coaching some of the most successful bodybuilders and strength guys out

00:04:48.880 there. Uh, Mike Rashid and C T Fletcher are among his advisees. Uh, he's also trained as a social

00:04:57.100 scientist with an expertise in conflict resolution and decision-making. Uh, he's taken all these skills

00:05:02.700 and more in his experiences and everything else and applied them and helping, uh, individuals tap

00:05:07.100 into the warrior spirit and produce incredible results in their life. Hope you enjoy this one.

00:05:13.120 Chris, what's up brother? Glad to have you back on the order of man podcast.

00:05:18.200 What's going on, Ryan? It's, uh, my pleasure to be here. You know, the things you've done with this,

00:05:24.220 uh, with this podcast, I am so impressed with what you've been able to do. And, uh, it's,

00:05:30.180 it's just a real honor. I appreciate it, man. I know I said back because what we did this,

00:05:35.880 like, gosh, it must've been eight months ago or maybe even longer. And I can't remember what it

00:05:42.040 seems to me like it didn't record right or the audio didn't work. I can't remember exactly what

00:05:47.220 had happened. And I know we've just been busy trying to get this happen and make it happen

00:05:51.300 again. So here we are. Yeah. The, uh, the audio went real, real bad and you know, it was just a

00:05:58.240 bunch of stuff over the years. So, but yeah, here now, brother, right on. Cool. Well, I know you've

00:06:04.500 got a lot going on. Um, you sent me some information over on some things about your life and you've got

00:06:08.920 some, just, you've got an incredible story and you've got some, I think really important

00:06:13.120 information that guys need to hear. But the thing I'm really interested about in, in addition to all

00:06:18.040 of that is your podcast and your movement warrior soul. I'd really like to start with what that means,

00:06:25.520 where that comes from and what the whole, the whole idea behind warrior soul actually is.

00:06:30.480 Yeah. You know, it, it goes back to, I served in the U S Marine Corps for six years. And when I got

00:06:39.240 out, like a lot of veterans, I was kind of trying to figure out where to go and what to do and really

00:06:46.580 found myself lost and drifted for a long time and, uh, found myself in some very, very bad spots,

00:06:53.640 uh, which we'll talk about in a little bit. But, um, one of the things that happened was I was able

00:07:00.160 to pull myself out of those bad spots and I was able to get myself into a position where I finally

00:07:06.760 realized that I was in control of my own fate. And I was looking at what was going on in the veteran

00:07:11.700 community at the time. And, uh, you know, we've, we've dealt with a lot of things over the past 18

00:07:18.260 years. Uh, and I'm sure you're aware of this cause you're a veteran as well, high suicide rates,

00:07:23.640 high rates of veteran homelessness. And, you know, about five, six years ago, looking out at what was

00:07:30.120 going on in the veteran space, there was, there was a lot of talk about awareness, a lot of talk

00:07:36.080 about suicide, a lot of talk about the homeless issue. But what I wasn't seeing was a lot of

00:07:42.200 solutions being brought out. And, uh, what I wanted to do was I wanted to create something that would

00:07:47.360 deliver solutions. And so that was how the warrior soul podcast started. Um, and,

00:07:53.640 to be honest with you, um, it took me about two years to create an actual podcast because I was,

00:08:01.160 I was doing other things. I was, I was a personal trainer. I had owned a, I'd owned a gym and then

00:08:06.640 went into online training and, uh, I didn't see podcasting as something that I could potentially do.

00:08:13.540 Um, but I decided to start it as an experiment and literally knew nothing about it. Like didn't do

00:08:19.100 any research, didn't do, uh, any of the, the, the, the technological research that I should have.

00:08:25.100 And I just kind of started it out and, uh, you know, um, three years later I'm here.

00:08:32.480 Yeah. Yeah. Just fast forward. Like nothing happened between now and then, right. It just

00:08:36.720 happened immediately. No, I mean, I started very much the same way when I started a podcast. Like I

00:08:42.880 did it as an experiment for my financial planning practice and I was amazed at how well it worked and

00:08:48.280 resonated and connected with people. So it's definitely a powerful medium. Did you, did you

00:08:53.740 get introduced to podcasting through Brian Rose? Cause I know you work with Brian for quite a while

00:08:58.400 and obviously he's been caught podcasting for a long time. Yeah. So when I started working with

00:09:04.280 Brian Rose, I, at first I came to him as a student. I was like one of the very first students

00:09:09.340 in his business accelerator, which was awesome. You know, I got to, got to learn about how to do

00:09:15.260 online products, how to do all that stuff. And, uh, I had met with Brian up in, um, San Francisco and

00:09:21.540 we meshed real well. And so, uh, after I went through his business accelerator course, uh, I'd done

00:09:28.660 really well with it. And he asked me to come on board as an instructor. And so what I got from that

00:09:34.740 experience was just a, a, a three year amazing apprenticeship in learning how to do online

00:09:42.420 business, learning how to do an online media company and just learning the ropes from what I

00:09:48.020 think is, is I, one of the masters in the field right now. I mean, the way he does this stuff,

00:09:53.720 absolutely awesome. And, uh, you know, I got to, got to meet hundreds of people from around the

00:10:01.480 world, teach hundreds of people around the world from around the world. And, um, the idea for the

00:10:06.260 podcast really started when the first time I heard Jocko, first time I heard Jocko, because up to that

00:10:13.140 point, I was under this impression that you needed a studio and you needed to look the way that Brian

00:10:20.520 Rose had, had everything. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Cause he's got a high end production going on over there.

00:10:25.880 Oh yeah. Yeah. And Brian was telling me, dude, you don't need this stuff. But when I heard

00:10:29.320 Jocko's voice, just the way he introduces himself, the way he was doing book reviews and things like

00:10:34.940 that, I was like, I got to try this. I got to do this. Maybe this is something I could do. And so

00:10:41.100 that's when I, I kind of jumped into it. But, um, one of the things I think is so important about

00:10:48.520 podcasting and particularly important about shows like this one, uh, what you've done over the past

00:10:54.700 few years is that, you know, this concept of a constitutional Republic, uh, that we have here

00:11:02.320 in the United States, I think people forget that it's, it's still a new concept, right? It's been,

00:11:08.040 it's been in existence for about a year, a couple hundred years. Yeah. Right. And if you're a student

00:11:13.700 of history, you start to realize that, that human beings tended to not go towards self-government.

00:11:21.660 They always tended to go toward tyranny, toward, toward having somebody else tell them what to do.

00:11:27.000 Right. Tyranny or a monarchy. Right. Yeah. And for something like this to survive,

00:11:32.360 people need to know how to manage themselves. They need to learn how to be free. And I think,

00:11:37.960 you know, what's so amazing about what you do and what Jocko does and what I'm trying to emulate is

00:11:42.840 really teaching people how to do that, teaching people how to manage themselves, teaching people how to

00:11:49.100 be free. Yeah. I mean, it's so, it's, it's so critical, you know, this is an underlying theme

00:11:55.880 of what we talk about is just men and their, their willingness and how quick they are to just pawn off

00:12:02.260 responsibility. And then of course the, the glory, frankly, that comes with it. You know, when we pawn

00:12:07.360 that off, I think a lot of times we pawn off the responsibility for maybe our ego, probably a little

00:12:14.400 safety and security. And then what we end up giving up in, in return for this perceived safety is some

00:12:20.540 sort of misguided sense of, of, of safety, but also losing our ability to have upward mobility,

00:12:29.540 right? Like our, our, our ability to succeed and thrive and try new things and be better and improve

00:12:36.360 all because we're worried about just maintaining the status quo or letting somebody else dictate our

00:12:40.360 life. Right. And it's so comfortable to have somebody else telling you what to do all the

00:12:46.360 time. So comfortable to have somebody else telling you this or that. And, and the thing is, do you

00:12:51.400 think I got to interrupt though? Because do you think that's comfortable? Cause like I look at it

00:12:55.240 and I hate it. I hate it. I don't even know, frankly, how I survived the military. You've got a military

00:13:01.100 background. Like when, when I was working with other organizations and these weren't organizations that

00:13:06.400 I didn't like, I actually enjoyed working with the people and I enjoyed the organization. I thought

00:13:11.540 the organizations were doing great things, but I just had a very difficult time with being directed

00:13:17.000 and commanded and ordered around. And that was always something very difficult for me. I don't

00:13:20.720 know if that's a personality thing or that's just, just comes with the territory of taking risk and

00:13:26.260 wanting to thrive and do better than you have in the past. Well, I think in a lot of ways you're,

00:13:30.860 you're probably an outlier there. And for myself, I know that as far as things go, when I was at my

00:13:39.700 worst, when I was, when I was dealing with a lot of my own problems, my problems were all self-caused

00:13:46.500 everything that ever, ever happened to me was self self-created. And one of the things I think that

00:13:53.940 really held me up was that I was constantly looking for somebody to tell me what to do. I was constantly

00:13:59.720 looking for somebody to say, okay, this is the way to go. And maybe it's because like you, I grew up

00:14:05.800 without a dad and I was constantly looking for, for, for other males and other people that to kind of

00:14:11.260 direct me. Um, but I found myself drifting and there had to be this kind of come to Jesus moment for me

00:14:18.920 where I was like, all right, nobody's going to come and tell you, okay, this is what you got to do.

00:14:23.960 Now you've got to actively go out there and search for it. And I think the thing is that it's not even

00:14:31.460 necessarily trying to get somebody to come and direct all aspects of our lives, but we fall into

00:14:37.580 tyranny in different ways. Um, you know, there, there's tyranny. I think, uh, there's a type of

00:14:44.640 tyranny in the way the internet runs our lives these days, constantly checking your phone, men who are

00:14:50.100 addicted to pornography, um, people who are constantly having the need to check their social

00:14:55.400 media to get that kind of stealth, uh, that self gratification from, from, from getting likes and,

00:15:01.600 and, uh, followers from strangers. Yeah, exactly. And then there's, there's tyranny over, you know,

00:15:07.560 our appetites, um, having sugar in our lives, right. Constantly, constantly having the need to stuff

00:15:13.780 something in our mouth, constantly having the need to, to not be hungry. Whereas throughout our,

00:15:19.800 our, our, our time as human beings, I mean, hunger was a fact of life. And I think that in society today,

00:15:26.320 what we're seeing is a lot of people are kind of tending toward or tending away from this idea of

00:15:33.720 freedom and toward this idea of being comfortable, being safe, not wanting to be offended ever. Uh, and,

00:15:42.960 and I think in a lot of ways that's making us weaker as human beings. Yeah. I mean, I, I wholeheartedly

00:15:50.800 agree. It's really comfortable. It's really, really easy now, but I found that if you take the easy

00:15:55.760 path, initially things have a way of getting harder. If you take the harder path, initially things have

00:16:01.080 a way of getting easier. I mean, I know that's even on a micro level, just from down to the way you start

00:16:05.700 your day. Like if you get up without hitting the snooze and you, you drink some water, you go for a run

00:16:12.000 or you go train or you do jujitsu or you whatever, whatever your thing is, and you move the body and

00:16:16.500 you put yourself under some sort of physical and mental stress. It seems to me that you tee yourself

00:16:22.120 up for being able to face whatever else is going to happen throughout the day, whether it's dealing

00:16:27.880 with an irate customer or a client or losing a client or getting an argument with your wife or

00:16:33.880 having to do some disciplinary action with your children. Like all of that stuff becomes easier

00:16:38.760 because easy is relative to the way you set up the rest of your life.

00:16:42.980 That is so true. So true. I mean, in a couple of hours, I'm going to put on a pair of pajama

00:16:49.660 looking outfit and then I'm going to go and I'm going to roll around with a bunch of sweaty men.

00:16:54.600 I'm going to get my face all mashed up in the, uh, in, in the process. And that's because I need

00:17:00.560 that in my life. I need something difficult there in my life. I need to face that confrontation.

00:17:06.120 And, um, you know, I, that's one, a big reason why I rolled jujitsu and why I know you rolled

00:17:13.120 jujitsu. But when it comes to these, the idea of trying to incorporate something difficult in our

00:17:18.320 life, one of the things that I think really, really matters here is the fact that a lot of us

00:17:26.500 haven't really faced any real challenges. A lot of us haven't been put into the situation where we're

00:17:32.560 truly going to be tested. And I think that if men don't face that test, if we don't face something

00:17:38.780 where it's truly a challenge and truly gives us a chance to test our mettle, what happens is we

00:17:45.440 become alienated from our true nature. We become alienated from ourselves. And that's where you see

00:17:50.360 a lot of men falling into depression. You see a lot of men, uh, they look for, uh, there's, um,

00:17:57.400 I heard this, this analogy to, uh, Australian shepherds. If, if you don't give them enough

00:18:02.940 space, if you don't give them something to do, they start digging holes and tearing up your house.

00:18:06.960 Sure. And, and if men don't have something to do, if they don't have that kind of, of thing in their

00:18:14.000 life where they're truly testing themselves, then they're going to end up digging a lot of holes and

00:18:18.760 they can dig holes in porn. They can dig holes by filling themselves up with sugar. They could dig

00:18:24.220 holes by, by wasting time and, and, uh, trying to find other distractions.

00:18:29.260 So when you talk about alienating your true nature for men specifically, is that what you're

00:18:34.300 referring to is just being active, being productive? Like what would you identify as being our true

00:18:38.880 nature that you would alienate by pursuing these more destructive activities and behaviors?

00:18:45.600 Well, I think, uh, I'm going to go back to an analogy that comes from my Marine Corps roots and that is

00:18:50.640 slaying dragons. Um, when I was, when, when I joined the Marine Corps, there was this really

00:18:56.240 popular commercial where you had the, this guy came out, there was a massive dragon. Um, he slayed

00:19:02.680 the dragon and then all of a sudden he was in his dress blues and he became a U S Marine. And that's

00:19:06.340 the commercial. I've seen that one. I remember that one. Yeah. That commercial is responsible for,

00:19:11.500 I think thousands of, of young men signing up back in the night. I'm sure. Yeah. And I think that,

00:19:19.020 the, the, what it comes down to is we need some sort of dragon to slay in our lives. Now that

00:19:24.700 doesn't have to be necessarily be a violent fight. Um, it doesn't necessarily have to be, uh, um, you

00:19:31.600 know, joining the military or anything like that. But I think the process of going out there and trying

00:19:38.940 to conquer something, no matter what it is, that could be a business that could be your career that

00:19:45.000 could be trying to be the best father. You're trying to the best father you can be. Um, but

00:19:50.580 whatever it is, we need something to slay. We need something to fight. I don't think that this is

00:19:57.640 like, like, like new information, right? I think a lot of people talk about this. I think we as men

00:20:02.220 inherently know we have to have some sort of battle to fight that that's what John Eldridge talks about

00:20:06.840 is deep in his heart. Every man longs for a battle to fight, an adventure to live in a beauty to

00:20:11.080 rescue. Like, I don't think this is new information, but why do you think so many guys struggle

00:20:16.500 with finding their purpose or their mission or their battle or their dragon or however you want

00:20:23.640 to term it? I think this is something a lot of guys struggle with you. Do you have any clues as to why

00:20:28.280 that is? I think in a lot of ways it's because we become passive. We've become very passive in what

00:20:34.960 we do. And, and so how do we become passive? I guess it's the better, the better, uh, way to

00:20:40.000 phrase that. And, uh, I'll go back, I guess, to what we do at the warrior soul podcast. Um,

00:20:45.900 if you look at how men end up joining the military, um, for a lot of men, that's actually a revolutionary

00:20:54.640 act, right? I, when I grew up, I grew up, you know, like I said, without a dad, my mom didn't want me to

00:21:01.120 join the military. My family didn't want me to join the military. Most of my friends told me I was a fool

00:21:05.600 for joining the military, right? When I ended up getting out, right. And that was the first thing,

00:21:11.500 the only thing I'd done up to that point that was for myself, right? Um, my mom wanted me to go to

00:21:16.620 college. My mom wanted me to, to go to grad school. She wanted me to get these degrees. And what

00:21:22.300 happened was when I ended up getting out, I came off of my own plan and I started following everybody

00:21:29.240 else's, right? Going to college, right? Getting that piece of paper that says, Hey, now I'm an

00:21:35.380 educated now. Now I could go do a job, right? Um, going out, trying to find a secure career and then

00:21:41.620 following the script, settling down, trying to get the white picket fence and all that stuff. Um,

00:21:47.360 and the thing for me was that at the time that was kind of like putting a square peg in a round hole.

00:21:55.060 Um, it wasn't where I really belonged, but I kept lying to myself and telling myself,

00:22:01.280 this is what I have to do. This is how I need to live my life. And I think what happens for a lot

00:22:07.940 of men is, and this is not to say that men should, should forgo their responsibilities, but it's to say

00:22:13.920 that a lot of men give up that warrior archetype entirely because they don't find it useful anymore.

00:22:20.040 They, they think that, okay, now my entire and complete focus needs to be on doing this job.

00:22:27.680 My entire complete focus needs to be on, on, on seeing to this household. And in the process,

00:22:35.140 they let themselves go. I think that's a valid point, but it's interesting because I think you

00:22:41.240 would make this connection and I certainly do as well is you don't need to be a literal warrior

00:22:47.060 warrior to carry over some of that warrior mentality and approach whatever your battle is or whatever

00:22:54.360 your relationship is or whatever your hobby or thing is like with that warrior mindset, that warrior

00:23:00.340 soul, essentially. Right. Exactly. Exactly. You don't need to actually be in the military or anything

00:23:08.840 like that to adopt the warrior archetype. Um, it's, it's something I think that's inherent in all of us.

00:23:14.260 And, and a lot of writers have talked about that, you know, uh, that, the King King warrior magician

00:23:19.700 lover book. That's how I are. Yeah. I think I've got it on the shelf here somewhere. Fantastic book

00:23:25.420 talks about how we go through each stage. Um, and you carry the knowledge of each archetype with you as

00:23:31.020 you go along. But the problem I think for, for a lot of us is like I said, we, we kind of surrender

00:23:36.040 that. And I think that, you know, in this day and age where, where so many people are, are, are kind of

00:23:45.160 alienated from their, their actual human form because we're living in a modern society. We're on the

00:23:51.460 internet all the time, sitting in front of a computer all the time. I think a lot of people look at things

00:23:56.220 like health and fitness and taking care of themselves as a luxury. They think it's something that they'll, they

00:24:01.280 should do when they have the time, they don't look at it as an obligation. Or wouldn't it be nice if I

00:24:06.300 could go take care of myself, but I've got these other responsibilities and therefore I can't, which

00:24:10.720 is an interesting story. Cause essentially what you're saying is that the people who do take care

00:24:15.460 of themselves don't have other responsibilities and obligations, which of course we know isn't true.

00:24:21.440 In fact, I'd argue that the people who take care of themselves probably have a greater capacity

00:24:26.820 and a greater workload, but they're able to shoulder it because they have the energy and the capacity to

00:24:30.680 do it. Exactly. Exactly. And I hear that a million times. Oh, it must be nice to, to be able to work

00:24:37.240 out all the time. It must be nice to have a low body fat percentage, you know? Right. It's like, it is

00:24:42.360 nice, but it isn't something that like, I was just gifted. Like I worked towards having that. Right.

00:24:47.860 Exactly. Exactly. And, um, you know, I think the thing is, we also see in society, the idea of

00:24:55.100 pursuing fitness as attached to vanity. So you want six pack abs or even, even like a 500 pound squat,

00:25:03.000 that could be a source of vanity. And the thing is, it's, it's, it's much more simple than that.

00:25:09.260 The reason why you need to pursue fitness, the reason why you need to take care of yourself

00:25:14.140 is because of freedom, right? Through fitness, through taking care of yourself, you free yourself up

00:25:21.460 to be able to pursue whatever you want to be able to, uh, do what you want for as long as you want

00:25:28.660 throughout your life. You know? And I think we have this concept of, okay, when I turn 55, 60,

00:25:34.720 I'm just going to sit on my couch, read the newspaper and, and not do it anymore. But as I'm

00:25:40.460 getting older, what I started to realize, I turned 40 last year. Um, there is no age where you're going to

00:25:46.900 go quietly off into the night, right? There, there is no age where you're going to be able to do that.

00:25:51.820 It's going to be equally horrible not to be mobile at, at 75 as it would be when you're 45.

00:26:00.360 And so people's behavior doesn't change. I mean, it's, it's not like one day, you know,

00:26:06.700 you even take a high, like a high, high, uh, highly efficient or extreme individual

00:26:11.820 who's been pursuing a career for 30 years. And I think when it comes to age 65, that all of a

00:26:17.580 sudden they're going to write off into the sunset and play golf every day for the rest of their life.

00:26:20.880 These guys quite literally, they die because they don't have that same drive, that same inspiration.

00:26:27.840 They don't have that battle. They don't have the thing that they need to fight for and against

00:26:31.940 like people's behavior doesn't change. And it's the same thing on the other side of the spectrum.

00:26:36.440 If you're out of shape and you're lazy and you're laying around, you're not working as hard as you

00:26:42.100 can be. It's not like it's some unforeseen destination or point that you're all of a sudden

00:26:46.720 going to start changing that mindset and get your ass off the couch and, and, and have the time to

00:26:51.380 be able to pursue this. Like you got to start changing that now, even if it's just a small little

00:26:55.940 degree, uh, and then build upon that as your capacity increases and improves. Right. Exactly. And,

00:27:03.320 and that's the thing, like, you know, because we're living longer and longer, right. And we could

00:27:09.800 probably, you and I could probably both expect to live, you know, if barring nothing else happening,

00:27:15.080 probably into our eighties or nineties, um, that's a reasonable expectation at this point.

00:27:20.000 And as we're living longer and longer, I mean, we really need to think about what we want the

00:27:25.360 quality of that life to be because we could do so many other things. I mean, I'm sure you, you've,

00:27:30.900 you've got a book out right, right now. I'm sure you, you could probably get out three, four or five

00:27:35.700 books over the course of a lifetime, three or four or five different businesses, touch the lives of

00:27:40.920 so many different people, you know, and not only that, more importantly, touch the lives of your

00:27:45.400 grandkids and your great grandkids, you know, um, and, and bring back that concept of family. I mean,

00:27:51.680 I think back to, to my own family history right now. And, and, you know, like I said, I never met my

00:27:57.680 dad. Um, there's a whole story there, but you know, I didn't really know my grandparents that

00:28:03.740 well, didn't really ever hear any stories about my great grandparents, you know? And, and, um,

00:28:10.040 I think as we get older and as we get to this point where we're living longer and longer,

00:28:14.340 I mean, that's going to be a really important thing, having deeper roots in your family and,

00:28:19.380 and, and having that tradition extend.

00:28:21.520 Well, I mean, people don't look back on their deathbed and think, Oh, I wish I would have worked

00:28:26.380 more. They always think, I wish I would have spent more time with my family or my kids or my wife or

00:28:32.460 pursued this hobby or this activity. I actually don't even really like to compartmentalize my life.

00:28:37.140 I used to, I used to think, okay, well, you know, I'm, I'm an employee or I'm an employer,

00:28:41.940 I'm a business owner, and then I'm a coach over here. And then I'm a dad and then I'm a husband.

00:28:45.760 And, and they were all looked at distinct responsibilities and roles that I played.

00:28:51.580 I don't do that anymore. Like there is no compartmentalizing in my life. I right now,

00:28:56.920 me being on this podcast, I am a father right now, right? And me, when I'm a father,

00:29:02.080 I am also a business owner. Like they, there's no compartmentalizing that are all together.

00:29:06.660 And that congruency I found between all the quote unquote roles that I have to fill

00:29:10.760 has really created a sense of satisfaction and fulfillment that I didn't have when I was trying

00:29:17.060 to like do everything. And they were all at odds and pulling on each other. And I just didn't have

00:29:21.700 time to do all the things that I wanted to do. It's just a much more effective and efficient way to

00:29:25.380 live. And that's amazing because you have no part of your life that's alienating the other part,

00:29:32.560 right? And it shouldn't be right. Exactly. Exactly. And that's the thing. Most people are

00:29:38.260 doing the opposite of what you're doing. They're compartmentalizing. They're saying, okay, I,

00:29:44.460 things are really crazy at work right now. So I'm going to put my fitness entirely off

00:29:49.480 for the next three months until after, you know, April, when things start slowing down. And I see

00:29:57.080 that over and over again as a trainer, um, amongst clients, I see them, them constantly trying to make

00:30:03.660 excuses, trying to, to, uh, to, to say, okay, I'm going to put this off now and wait till later on.

00:30:11.660 Um, right. You know, and, and I hear that, I hear the money excuse a lot of times when, when the truth

00:30:18.880 is all you need is your body. You could use a kettlebell. You can, uh, and the time excuse,

00:30:25.000 burpees, like that's all you need. Do a hundred of those. I promise you're going to get stronger if you

00:30:30.800 do a hundred burpees a day, a hundred burpees a day. Do, do 10 pushups during the commercial break

00:30:37.000 while you're watching TV at night, you know, or set a, sit an alarm on your, uh, your phone every

00:30:42.560 hour, get up and do three sets of body weight squats. You get a whole workout in by the end

00:30:47.340 of the day. Yeah. Yeah. It's a great point. Yeah. It's funny when people say, Oh, I'm too busy or I

00:30:53.720 have this thing going on and not to discount it. Cause you actually might be like, you might have a lot

00:30:58.440 of things going on, but I just don't believe that that should forsake everything else that you're

00:31:03.120 doing. You might need to scale back or, or change your schedule a little bit. Maybe you can't work

00:31:08.380 out at 5am cause you got to get ready and go into work, but maybe you can do that on a lunch break

00:31:12.520 or you can do it. Like you said, throughout the day or when you get home, it's like, don't,

00:31:16.060 don't neglect that stuff. Just change your schedule according to your, your busy, chaotic,

00:31:21.840 hectic life. Like everybody's busy. You're not special by being busy. Everybody's busy.

00:31:26.260 Or going back to what we were seeing earlier about following scripts and, and kind of doing

00:31:32.400 what society expects you to do. Uh, you know, rather than going to the expensive designer gym,

00:31:38.360 you know, get that workout in at home, right. Or, or realize that you don't require a gym to train,

00:31:45.060 or you don't require, you know, uh, uh, the perfect environment to do so. Right. You could get this in

00:31:51.680 wherever you want. Gents, allow me to hit the pause button very quickly and tell you about our

00:31:56.820 first ever main legacy event. Now, guys, this is an experience that's going to be held June 11th

00:32:02.460 through the 14th, 2020 this year on my property here in Maine. And it's a father son event. Like

00:32:08.220 no other, if you're anything like me, ushering your son into manhood is one of your biggest concerns.

00:32:14.220 In fact, it's probably one of the few things that really keeps you up at night.

00:32:17.180 Uh, and over the course of three and a half days, we've designed an experience to push you to test

00:32:24.300 you and ultimately to inspire both you and your son, uh, to do more and to be more. We're going to

00:32:30.600 be shooting archery, uh, participating in physical, mental, and emotional challenges, competing in

00:32:36.100 jujitsu and learning some of the frameworks for success in life. This is a framework that your son

00:32:42.020 is going to be able to take throughout the course of his entire life to produce the results that

00:32:46.500 he will be after. And he will desire in his, uh, you're going to be partnered up and banded up with

00:32:51.900 and, and challenging and competing against the 19 other father son combos that are going to be

00:32:56.640 joining you. I think this is our fourth legacy event now. And I got to tell you, this is probably

00:33:01.440 my favorite event that we've done and we've done, uh, close to two dozen now. So if you're interested

00:33:08.580 in learning more about what the legacy event and experience is all about, and you want to lock in

00:33:13.520 your seat, you got to do so quickly because I think we have eight spots and those are going to go very,

00:33:17.160 very quickly. As I talk about it a little bit more, now that we have everything pinned down,

00:33:20.180 uh, you can head to order of man.com slash legacy, order of man.com slash legacy. Learn more lock in

00:33:26.680 your spot, watch the videos of what we've done in the past. And I think you'll be inspired to join us.

00:33:31.260 And we'd love to have you there. All right, guys, get that done after the podcast for now.

00:33:35.240 We'll finish my conversation up with Chris. I think where a lot of people get hung up though,

00:33:40.580 is that they look at it and think, okay, well, I want to do this. Let's say it's physical fitness

00:33:45.700 or pick up a new hobby. And they want to do it to this high level, this high degree.

00:33:50.180 And because they can't, because of time constraints and other resources that aren't available,

00:33:54.340 rather than saying, okay, I can't do it to that degree. I'm just going to do it

00:33:58.900 to this lower degree. They just won't do it at all. So just get started and then build from

00:34:04.840 there and expand and grow and evolve and maybe time frees up down the road and you can invest a

00:34:10.780 little bit more into, but getting started is the priority. Exactly. And, and the thing is,

00:34:16.520 and you're so right about that because I, you know, when I first got into fitness,

00:34:21.380 um, I was deep in a bodybuilding and ended up training pro bodybuilders for a while.

00:34:26.700 And because I was kind of known for this, I worked with guys like CT Fletcher. I worked with Mike

00:34:31.400 Rashid. Um, I used to own Metroflex gym out in Long Beach. We'd get a lot of those,

00:34:36.340 those really famous guys come in, but we'd also get guys who were just trying to get started,

00:34:42.640 but I'd get people coming in and say, saying, Hey, I want to be a pro bodybuilder in the next

00:34:48.420 three years. And I'm like, okay, well, well, let's pull that back a little bit. Let's,

00:34:54.200 let's teach you how to squat first. Let's teach you how to deadlift. Let's just get this thing off the

00:34:58.980 ground. Right. Or, or, okay. How much time do you have? Well, I can come in one day a week.

00:35:04.320 Excuse me. Yeah. You're never getting to where you want to be ever, let alone the next three years.

00:35:10.300 Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. And one thing that really taught me about that was jujitsu because,

00:35:16.780 you know, when I first walked into the jujitsu studio, I was, I mean, I was a lot heavier than I

00:35:23.580 am now. I, I was dead lifting over 600 pounds and I had this idea that I was going to be really good

00:35:29.640 the first day. And then I got broken in half by a dude who was like 135 pounds, like 14 years old

00:35:36.400 and, and completely destroyed. And that taught me like, dude, there's a process here. You gotta,

00:35:42.920 you gotta have a white belt mentality when you're doing something new, you've got to come into this,

00:35:47.860 like you don't know anything and, and you've got to keep your eyes and ears open to try to absorb

00:35:53.260 everything you can. Yeah. Yeah. But that's really hard for somebody who takes pride in, in being

00:35:59.760 successful or has been successful in his life. It actually is really hard for that individual to

00:36:05.440 actually go out and try something new because that poses a threat to his perceived greatness,

00:36:11.640 even if it's only perceived by himself. But you, you go into a jujitsu gym or, you know,

00:36:17.920 you pick up a new hobby or, or you, you get a new mentor or hire a coach, man, a lot of people won't

00:36:24.140 do that because they don't want to be a beginner. Like they hate being a beginner and they hate looking

00:36:29.220 like a loser, which I understand. But man, if you want to succeed, you got to get over that and get over

00:36:33.820 yourself. Yeah. It's the most vital thing. It's the most vital thing, especially, you know,

00:36:40.240 the profession you and I are in here with podcasting. I mean, I get a lot of people who

00:36:45.920 contact me saying they want to start a podcast and I'm sure you do too. And one of the things I'm

00:36:51.440 constantly having to tell them is that, you know, this isn't a, you turn on the switch and then

00:36:56.760 people are just going to come listen to you. I mean, this is a constant, you got to put the work

00:37:01.860 in every day. You got to show up every day. You got to learn everything you can and you can't get

00:37:08.020 your head so wrapped around the numbers, uh, that you're going to stop because you don't think

00:37:14.260 anybody's listening. Right. Do that. You're never going to get anywhere. Right. Right. Yeah. It's

00:37:20.700 that false sense of expectation about what it's going to take and how it, like people say that

00:37:24.920 all the time. Like, Oh, I must, I want your job. It must be nice. You know, you just dink around on

00:37:29.480 social media and have conversations with cool people. It's like, uh, there's a little more to it than

00:37:35.020 that, but okay. I mean, if that's what you think it's going to take, then you're never going to

00:37:39.000 pursue this. And even if you do pursue it, you're never going to achieve any level of success.

00:37:43.080 You're just going to throw in the towel when you realize, Oh, there's actual work involved with

00:37:48.020 what we're doing here. This is why I always tell people, it'd be very, very cautious of discounting

00:37:53.060 other people's success because then it just tees you up for failure. Right. And it's not just work.

00:38:01.120 You know, I think what people don't realize is that at the beginning of something like you did,

00:38:06.740 you know, there was no guarantee that order of man would have become what it is right now.

00:38:13.300 There was nothing, there was no guarantee at all. You probably weren't getting pats on the back at

00:38:18.700 first or anything like that. There was probably no encouragement. You probably had to generate that

00:38:23.060 for yourself. And I think in our, our, this, this period we're existing in where you look at schools

00:38:30.480 and you look at the way things are being carried out and the language that teachers are having to

00:38:34.900 use when they talk to students. Um, I think that a lot of people are going to be ill prepared for

00:38:41.320 doing things like getting into business or, or entrepreneurship because that encouragement's

00:38:47.340 not there at first. Right. And even if it is, you know, one, one thing I run across every so often is

00:38:54.460 this notion that people want to be praised and encouraged for doing nothing. You know,

00:39:00.820 like they, like they show up to work on time or they don't, they don't, they don't ever miss a day

00:39:05.260 of work. And so they're praised as never missing a day of work. It's like, that's like the lowest

00:39:09.900 common exception standard. There's no, we've just set the bar so low that people expect to be praised

00:39:19.900 and honored for the most trivial of activities that ordinary everyday people are doing every

00:39:28.180 single day without any sort of mention or notoriety or praise that comes with it. It's just kind of the

00:39:32.760 expectation that you do the bare minimum that you show up. You don't need a reward for that. Some of

00:39:39.620 these people do, it seems like. Right, exactly. And, and like I said, I think it's gonna, it's gonna

00:39:45.640 shoot them in the foot, particularly the younger generation. And, and, um, you know, the thing is,

00:39:51.000 I, uh, I don't, I'm not one of these people who likes to talk crap about the millennial generation

00:39:56.220 or anything like that, because if we're honest, millennials have fought two wars, right. Over

00:40:01.240 the past. Well that, but then there's, you know, there's losers in every generation. It's not like

00:40:05.760 this is exclusive to one particular group of young people. Like I know plenty of old people who feel

00:40:11.700 just as entitled, if not more so than the youngsters coming up. Exactly. And one thing I, one point I

00:40:17.380 constantly bring up, and then I say to a lot of the people from the older generation is that if this

00:40:22.380 generation is any more screwed up than previous generations, it's, it's our fault. It's because we

00:40:28.100 didn't teach them correctly. It's because we didn't bring the knowledge that we should have.

00:40:32.420 Yeah. Agreed. I want to go back. I mean, something you brought up, gosh, a half an hour ago now is

00:40:38.200 you were talking about veterans struggling. Like what, what is your, your thought process behind

00:40:43.300 the epidemic of depression and suicide in the veteran community?

00:40:49.600 Well, on a couple of different levels, uh, number one, what I'll say is this, I think that

00:40:55.960 the epidemic of depression and suicide amongst the veteran community is also endemic to what's

00:41:02.620 happening to, to, to us as a society in general. Um, the suicide rates are going up, uh, rates of

00:41:11.580 depression are going up. Right. And, and why is it so apparent in the veteran community? I think it's

00:41:19.520 because when you are serving in the military and I tell people this all the time, um, I was in some

00:41:26.280 ways more free than I had ever been when I was serving in the Marine Corps. And that, that surprises

00:41:32.120 people at first, but it's like, I didn't have any debt. Um, I had a mission. I had a complete focus

00:41:38.460 on that mission. I was surrounded by friends. I was surrounded by older men who cared about my

00:41:45.220 success and COs and officers. Um, I had a set path. And, um, when you get out, you lose all that.

00:41:54.200 And I think that, that all men go through this, this at particular at different stages, right? Maybe

00:42:00.120 you played football. Maybe you, you had a group of friends when you were younger, maybe you were a

00:42:04.840 little bit, you know, a little bit more wild when you're younger and things start to slow down. But

00:42:09.860 I think that, um, when we had the military, that process happens literally in a matter of, of days

00:42:18.140 when you get out from the time you get out to the time you're sitting there alone for, and in some

00:42:23.900 cases you're sitting alone for the first time in years, um, happens in just a few days. And so I,

00:42:31.040 what I see out there is, is a lot of guys getting out with no real plan, no, no idea for what the

00:42:38.120 next mission is going to be. And then no idea more importantly, how to bring the same kind of meaning

00:42:43.620 and purpose into their lives again. So what the, the base problem I see is that a lot of these guys

00:42:50.340 lack vision for, for where they're going to go and what they're going to do. The other part of this

00:42:56.280 is before you get into that, actually, Chris, I want to say one thing on that. Cause I think this

00:43:00.720 is a real problem, not just for veterans, but civilians as well is not having, like you said,

00:43:09.240 not having the vision for what it is they want to do. They just, at best people are just going

00:43:14.040 through the motions and then they get a year down the road or five or 10 years down the road and

00:43:19.160 they're looking back and they wonder why they don't have any satisfaction, fulfillment,

00:43:22.340 success in their life. It's like, whose life were you living? Were you even living life?

00:43:26.920 I mean, you were checking off the boxes, but there's not much life in checking out boxes.

00:43:31.860 Life is found in that adventure, purpose, vision, those sorts of things. So it is very,

00:43:36.760 very important. And I think that it's something that too many people just overlook. Like,

00:43:41.800 I don't have time to think about what I want. Like I got too much work. I got to do this. Well,

00:43:45.240 at some point you're going to have to back yourself out of it and figure out of what you're doing

00:43:49.140 is actually what you want to be doing. That is, that is so true. And it goes back to what I was

00:43:55.560 saying before, how we tend to follow these societal scripts. Guys will get out and then they, they go

00:44:02.360 into this life and they, they just kind of go through the motions and then they wake up and

00:44:06.440 they're like, well, this isn't the life I wanted. This isn't the life I wanted to live. And, and again,

00:44:12.440 it comes down to alienating themselves from, from their nature, alienating themselves from the

00:44:17.240 identity that they've built up over the last few years. And I think beyond that, there's also a

00:44:24.600 problem where as a young man in the military, you get more responsibility than other young men, right?

00:44:31.300 You know, a 19 year old Lance Corporal in the Marine Corps is oftentimes in charge of a lot of

00:44:39.020 equipment, millions of dollars of equipment. Sometimes they're in charge of, of human beings

00:44:43.420 being team leaders. And, and, and, uh, you know, when you become a corporal, you become a team leader.

00:44:47.820 When you become a, a sergeant, you become a squad leader. And we're talking about people who are 22

00:44:52.700 years old, right? Young, really young. Exactly. And then you get out and you expect to step into an

00:45:00.220 organization and to be given the same kind of trust and the same kind of, uh, credibility that you had

00:45:08.180 with that rank. Um, and so I think one problem for a lot of guys is that they don't want to go back to

00:45:17.220 zero. They don't see themselves as being able to go back to zero. They see themselves as, okay,

00:45:22.580 this civilian here needs to recognize who I am, what I've been through, and they need to see that

00:45:28.800 I'm a leader. And, and one of the things I'm constantly trying to explain to guys is, well,

00:45:33.240 you've got to show that. You've got to demonstrate that. Exactly. Exactly. And, and if you're not

00:45:40.600 demonstrating it, that civilian doesn't know, they don't know you from Adam, right? Yeah. How would

00:45:44.780 they know? I just think there's a lot of, there's a lot of entitlement speaking of that, uh, in inside

00:45:50.580 of the military community, like I'm entitled, I'm owed, like, because I'm a veteran, like I have to

00:45:54.900 have a job and you have to do this for me and you have to do that. It's like, man, like you have this,

00:45:59.260 this, this, this mentality and this skillset and this ability to like go out and take what you want

00:46:06.040 and you're waiting for other people to bring it to you, to give it to you. Where, where does that

00:46:11.460 come from? I'm, I'm, I mean, that's a, that's a real question. That's not rhetorical. Where,

00:46:15.340 where does that entitlement come from? Well, it goes back to when you talk about entitlement,

00:46:20.840 there's another word there and it's the V word victim. A lot of guys have been conditioned to see

00:46:26.660 themselves as victims. And I think that a lot of the language centered around what happens with

00:46:34.500 veterans, uh, in, in, in this country is centered around trying to mobilize them into a victim class.

00:46:41.640 And that, that idea has made me pretty unpopular with some people. Um, one of the things I've, uh,

00:46:49.320 I've talked about consistently is that, you know, if, if you think that anybody owes you anything as a

00:46:57.040 veteran, you're wrong, right? You're wrong. It's, yeah. I mean, veterans signed up to participate.

00:47:04.280 Like that was your choice. Nobody coerced you or manipulated you or forced you. That was your

00:47:10.020 choice. Now there's some benefits that have been, uh, agreed upon that have been promised to our veteran

00:47:16.780 community. And I think we as citizens and the government ought to uphold our promises,

00:47:22.160 but outside of that, like, go take what you want, go earn. What is yours? That's on you. Nobody else.

00:47:29.300 Well, it's, it goes beyond that too, because you actually have to apply to get into the military,

00:47:34.980 right? You have to take a test, the asphalt to show your worth so that you can get in.

00:47:40.820 And it's not just, there's this idea out there that somehow people in the military are less capable

00:47:49.180 or not smart enough to go get into college and things. And that's complete trash. Um, and it plays

00:47:55.460 into this idea of the dumb, the poor, dumb veteran who gets out and doesn't have any opportunities in

00:48:00.480 front of them. And it's just not true. The more we, there's a lot of veterans out there though,

00:48:05.600 that I think play up the stereotype. And one of the big reasons why I started this podcast,

00:48:12.520 you know, uh, years ago was I was seeing this whole thing about, I'm a dysfunctional veteran.

00:48:18.380 I don't, don't talk to me. Don't, don't, don't get my face. Don't do anything to me. Leave me alone.

00:48:25.040 Don't, don't shoot fireworks outside of my house. Like that.

00:48:28.280 And I'm like, come on, man, come on. Like you're not that fragile. You are not that fragile. Human

00:48:36.660 beings in general are not that fragile. And you definitely are not that fragile because you've

00:48:41.480 demonstrated over the last four or five years that you were capable of some amazing things.

00:48:47.100 Taking you out of that environment, putting you in the civilian world doesn't change that.

00:48:52.340 So why then do veterans seem to have a hard time? And I don't think this is like

00:48:56.300 the overwhelming majority. I don't even think it's the majority. I think it's maybe the minority,

00:49:01.880 but it's still a sizable group of veterans who have a difficult time transitioning that skill set

00:49:07.820 over into civilian life. Right. And again, I think it goes back to that idea of, they think that,

00:49:15.600 that when they get into that civilian job, it needs to, somebody needs to automatically recognize that.

00:49:21.780 And it, I think a lot of veterans have to go back into the civilian world with a white belt mentality,

00:49:27.600 treating themselves as beginners, treating themselves in a way that they're going to do

00:49:33.300 everything they can to learn. And honestly, a lot of veterans do this, right? I've met so many

00:49:39.140 veterans who, who, who've come into their civilian jobs. They just want to learn. They want to,

00:49:43.520 they want to do everything they can to get ahead. They want to impress their bosses and everything like

00:49:48.040 that. But I think like anything, there was a vocal minority at the, for a while who were, who were,

00:49:54.440 uh, going through their own issues and, and, and kind of putting things out there like that,

00:50:00.560 you know, this whole dysfunctional veteran thing. Well, I also think there's a group of people who

00:50:05.440 pander to victims, whether we're talking about these guys in the, in the, in the veteran community,

00:50:09.700 or, you know, some other subset of people who believe that they're victimized,

00:50:13.940 is that there's another group of individuals who will pander to that and will appease them

00:50:20.660 and buy into their story and make them feel comfortable with that narrative and support

00:50:26.280 that narrative. And what ends up happening is, is it just kind of feeds on itself. I think the best

00:50:33.240 thing that we can do as friends, coaches, mentors is not to enable people to play the victim card,

00:50:40.420 but to call them out on it and then support them in a constructive and positive way to throw that

00:50:47.440 card away and play the rest of the hand that they were dealt, which is strong, capable, assertive,

00:50:55.700 able to learn humility, strength, and use those skill sets and traits as room for growth in their life.

00:51:05.700 Exactly. We, we think we're doing people a favor when we pander them or like, or, or, or enable

00:51:12.040 them to behave that way. You're, you're, you're not, you're hindering them. You're handicapping

00:51:15.860 these people. No, you're exactly right. And, and those people who are pandering, you've got to watch

00:51:21.980 out for them. That's true. Cause they might have another agenda or motive for doing it.

00:51:26.180 Right. They're turning you into a pawn. They're turning you into a, to their weapon weaponizing you

00:51:31.040 either as a political weapon or as something to benefit themselves. Yeah, that's a great point.

00:51:36.840 I think that's really, really true. Yeah. You got to be aware, aware of that stuff. So how would you

00:51:44.260 suggest then that, you know, and again, we're talking about this white belt mentality, which I

00:51:49.340 actually liked that concept a lot. What I think people overlook is that you don't ever start back

00:51:55.660 over at a white belt, right? It would be like, I'm trying to think of an analogy here. So I did a

00:52:03.240 little bit of wrestling in high school. And when I started doing jujitsu about six months ago, I

00:52:08.800 started taking it seriously six, seven months ago. It was like, I didn't start. I mean, yes, I was a

00:52:15.400 white belt, but there was something a little bit different for me because I had a little bit of

00:52:20.480 wrestling background that helped me pick up on some things a little faster than somebody who didn't

00:52:25.520 have that background. So even though people are starting over, whether that's a civilian going

00:52:30.060 to a new job or a veteran transitioning out of the military, you're not starting from scratch.

00:52:35.960 You've got experience and a background and education and traits that you've developed.

00:52:40.900 Now it's just transferring them over, downloading them to this new job that you're now engaged in.

00:52:49.180 I want to take that analogy another step though, too, because I was a wrestler in high school as well.

00:52:53.680 And one of the things that I think, like, let's say you walked into jujitsu that first day

00:52:59.920 and you came in hard charging as a wrestler. I'm a wrestler. I'm going to show that wrestling's the

00:53:06.020 best grappling art there is, right? And then go in and you do a double leg take down. Now for those at

00:53:15.680 home, if you do a double leg take down on a jujitsu guy, if you don't know jujitsu,

00:53:21.740 the first thing the jujitsu guy is going to do is he's going to take your head, which is probably

00:53:26.960 on the outside because he's going to guillotine you for sure. He's going to take your head off

00:53:31.640 with a guillotine, right? Take your head off with a guillotine. And you're going to learn,

00:53:36.140 you're going to be like, Oh man, that didn't work. But, but wrestling still the best. Right.

00:53:40.040 And then on the next round, the guy goes to his back, right? And he puts you in guard and you're

00:53:47.160 like, Oh, I'm a wrestler. I'm going to grab his head and everything. And you're reaching for his

00:53:50.640 head. And then the guy's going to put you into an arm bar or right. Right. And then finally you get

00:53:57.680 super frustrated and the jujitsu guy sees you're, you're completely frustrated. And then he does his

00:54:02.340 own take down on you and you go to your wrestling skills and you go to your knees and you go to turtle

00:54:07.260 position and which is natural for a wrestler going to your stomach course. Yeah. And he's going to

00:54:12.960 take your back. He's going to take your back and he's going to choke you out. Right. And the problem

00:54:18.700 is, I think that a lot of veterans, they're coming into their civilian job saying I'm a veteran. I'm

00:54:25.060 this, I talk to people this way. This is how I address people. Right. I'm, this is, this is how I

00:54:31.060 carry myself and things like that. And there's two ways of carrying yourself as a veteran. There's,

00:54:36.000 there's the professional way that we were taught to carry ourselves. And then there's the stereotypical

00:54:40.640 way that a lot of guys carry themselves, you know, posturing, constantly trying to, uh, to,

00:54:46.820 to show that they're the best, they're the man. And if you do that, somebody is going to show you

00:54:51.460 you're not. Right. Yeah. I think there's a fine line between, uh, exhibiting a level of, of humility,

00:54:58.920 uh, and then the aggressiveness. And I think that line is just being assertive, right? Like you,

00:55:04.060 you come in there, be confident in the skills that you have, but be opening open rather to

00:55:10.540 honing and harnessing those skills based on feedback from people who've been in the type

00:55:18.020 of fight that you're now in. Like it's a new battle and you aren't, yeah, the, this, the

00:55:23.500 strategies are going to be similar, but you weren't completely aware of the new battlefield. So you got

00:55:27.560 to get familiar with it from other people who are already fighting that battle. Right. It's,

00:55:33.840 it's almost like being assertively humble, right? Assertively humble saying, I, I know what I don't

00:55:39.480 know. And, and I'm going to do my best to learn it. Right. Right. Because the other side of it is

00:55:45.180 being overly humble, which I don't, I don't even consider humble. I would consider more of, of weak

00:55:50.900 or cowardly or pathetic or like the nice guy syndrome. And then you just get railroaded and

00:55:57.320 walked over. So there's, there's that extreme too, that you, you got to be careful of going towards.

00:56:03.540 Right. It's not, it's not going in and saying, Hey, you know, whatever plan you have, I'm going to go

00:56:09.000 with it saying, Hey, you know, I want to do the best job possible. I want to, I want to be an asset

00:56:15.220 to this organization. So, you know, whatever it is that I need to learn, I'm going to learn it. I

00:56:21.140 want to learn from you. I want to, I want to, I want to see how to do this the best way possible.

00:56:27.220 Yeah. Yeah. Agreed. So your background. So I know that you, you talked about owning that gym.

00:56:34.240 But I know also that you had some experiences there where, where you lost ownership, I believe,

00:56:39.420 of the gym and kind of have rebuilt this over the past several years to, to get you back on track of

00:56:44.320 things. Tell me a little bit about that. Yeah, I mean, um, it, it goes back to a lot of what we've

00:56:52.200 been talking about. And the reason why I do this podcast is because it's not because I'm perfect.

00:56:56.840 It's not because I, I know more than most because I've made a lot of mistakes and learned from them.

00:57:02.400 And I got guillotined a whole bunch of times. And so, uh, you know, um, I was one of the co-founders

00:57:09.140 of, of Metroflex gym in Long Beach, which is actually a pretty famous gym. Um, it's,

00:57:14.320 gym that CT Fletcher came out of, it's the gym that Mike Rashid came out of Frank Medrano. It's

00:57:19.360 all over a lot of the bodybuilding magazines and things like that. And, um, you know, when we first

00:57:24.640 started it, um, my only, my only real experience was as a Marine. Um, I'd worked in politics for a

00:57:34.500 little bit, um, in the U S government. And then, um, I, I went on to graduate school. So needless to

00:57:41.320 say, I didn't have a, I wasn't rolling in startup capital when I, when I first started it. So it was,

00:57:46.560 um, me and my buddy, um, he, he'd had most of the, most of the capital. It was this garage, uh,

00:57:53.680 and it was just a bunch of equipment in there. Uh, and, and when we first started, you know,

00:57:59.360 it was like 2011, I think. And CrossFit was a big concept, but the idea of a hardcore gym was just

00:58:06.800 kind of starting out the idea of including all these things. Most of the gyms in Southern

00:58:10.480 California were health clubs, right? They had like dumbbells, cardio decks, and things like that.

00:58:17.820 And so we get people coming in and they'd be like, what is this place? What, where's the cardio deck?

00:58:23.580 Where's the, where's the swimming pool, that kind of stuff. And, um, you know, over time we had this

00:58:30.860 whole plan. We said, okay, you know, we're going to open our doors and every hardcore bodybuilder in

00:58:36.340 Southern California is going to want to come to Long Beach and, and, and do this. And, and, um,

00:58:41.200 it wasn't really like that. There were crickets for, for, for months. And on top of that, we had

00:58:47.220 overhead, um, you know, a lot of overhead to, to, to start a gym. You've got to pay a whole lot of

00:58:53.560 money and every month there's money coming out. And so, um, I was living off of 200, $300 a month,

00:59:00.900 um, at the time. And, uh, I made a real genius decision and, and I decided to get married. Um,

00:59:09.740 and, and she was a girl from, from Connecticut, um, who had met out in California and she was, uh,

00:59:18.500 it, it was this idea I had in my head that said, Hey, it's time to settle down, you know, for some,

00:59:24.000 some strange reason, following somebody else's plan. Obviously, um, the, the financial stress,

00:59:30.820 the, the stress of me working 16 to 18 hours a day in the gym, sometimes sleeping in the gym,

00:59:38.020 um, that caught up with the marriage, marriage folded. Um, I ended up having to give up my shares

00:59:45.840 of the gym. Um, luckily, you know, still friends with, with the current owner got to, to,

00:59:54.000 sleep in the gym sometimes, but was living pretty much out of my car because I no longer had a place

00:59:59.180 to live. And, um, you know, it was, was starting from scratch at that point. And then, uh,

01:00:07.240 with the, the thing I can say about it is this, you know, when you're going through something like

01:00:11.340 that, a lot of times it's, it's really difficult to find the way out. You get tunnel vision and you

01:00:18.360 tend to make things worse through an action because you get so overwhelmed. You don't know exactly what

01:00:23.980 to do. Right. And so, yeah, while I was there, I was watching everybody do these, this filming

01:00:30.160 stuff. I was watching them do YouTube and I was like, well, why do people want to do YouTube?

01:00:35.180 Why do people, why are, why is social media, why is everybody so obsessed with social media? I just

01:00:40.060 want to train people. And, uh, finally it was Mike Rashid. Um, he said, listen, man, cause I was

01:00:47.100 friends with him and he said, you know, I know you're going through a lot. Um, I'm going to give you

01:00:51.960 this computer and I still have a laptop computer sitting over there. It was an old, old iMac.

01:00:56.920 And he said, why don't you start, you're so knowledgeable about nutrition. You're so

01:01:01.160 knowledgeable about fitness. Why don't you start trying to get yourself out in, out on YouTube?

01:01:06.420 And I was like, all right, let's, let's try this. And so, um, I, I, I put out my first video

01:01:14.180 and really didn't go much of anywhere, but, but I started doing videos every day and it was almost

01:01:19.300 like therapy and, uh, started talking about nutrition, started talking about hormones,

01:01:25.640 started talking about, you know, some, some of the tricks we use to help prep bodybuilders and

01:01:30.700 things like that built up a following. It wasn't millions of people by any means, but it was enough

01:01:36.340 of a following to where I started getting people contacting me about online training. Right. And so

01:01:41.660 slowly, but surely I earned enough money to get myself out of that situation I was in where I was

01:01:48.160 living in my car, um, to, to living in a rented room and the room felt like a palace, man.

01:01:55.120 Like that situation to like, to like having a rented room. It's like, wow, man, I could do anything.

01:02:01.580 And then I, I doubled down. I started, started creating more videos. I started, I wrote an ebook

01:02:07.440 called getting you shredded and slowly, but surely more money was able to get enough money to get my

01:02:13.160 own apartment and then kept going with it, kept going with it. And, um, finally I was, I was making

01:02:19.840 more money than I ever had in my life. And this is before I'd had any business training before I ran

01:02:24.020 into Brian Rose before, before, uh, doing his business accelerator. And I said, you know what?

01:02:29.720 Um, I looked out at the world and I realized that what I was doing, you know, helping bodybuilders

01:02:37.240 was cool. It was awesome, but there was more that I could do. And that's when I remembered,

01:02:43.600 you know, my background is being a Marine. I looked at it, what was going on in the veteran

01:02:49.340 community. And, um, I'd seen an Instagram post with, um, it was when Dakota Meyer first won his,

01:02:56.920 his medal of honor. And, um, I, I was just so inspired by that. And I was looking at what was

01:03:04.240 going on in the veteran community. And I, I met a guy named Justin Fitch and Justin Fitch was an army

01:03:10.240 officer, um, who had first, uh, started talking about veteran suicide and, um, he had, um, developed

01:03:19.680 stomach cancer. Uh, and he, he was in the last months of his life and, and kind of developed a

01:03:24.780 relationship with him and, and the stuff he was doing. And, um, that was where the idea for warrior

01:03:31.460 soul kind of started. Uh, because I knew that there were other problems. There were bigger problems

01:03:36.840 than just helping people get abs and, and helping people to, to build muscle out there in that I

01:03:44.000 wanted to solve those. It's powerful, man. Like I, I, the thing I appreciate most about what you're

01:03:49.760 saying is just incorporating our entire conversation. You know, like what you did was basically what we

01:03:56.560 shared here, like taking responsibility, taking ownership, starting with nothing and not having

01:04:02.820 like this clear expectation of what it is going to be, or just, just getting launched, like all of

01:04:07.380 these lessons you incorporated into that. And it's worked in your life. Certainly very similar for me

01:04:10.900 as well. Right. And, you know, there's one thing I want to say to, to those people at home who might be

01:04:16.900 going through something like that. And, and, you know, there was a point where I was driving around

01:04:22.260 and, um, I was on the beach, uh, and Redondo beach. I was sitting in my car and, um, I was looking

01:04:29.600 around and I was looking at people walking around and, and I was, I was, it was at my worst, really

01:04:35.300 lonely. And I was looking at couples, I'm looking at families walking and I saw this family walking

01:04:40.640 by and it was a, a, a mom, a dad, two little kids. I remember the kids had, had curly hair,

01:04:47.200 really cute. And I said, I said to myself, you know, I want that so bad. I want that so bad.

01:04:54.180 And, you know, at first it was like, well, I was saying in my head, why can't I have that? Why can't

01:04:59.500 I have, why can't I be the one who's doing that? And then this voice kind of came into my head and it

01:05:05.360 said, you can, you can, you just got to do the work in order to be able to get there.

01:05:13.660 And it's going to be up to you if that ever happens. And that's when I really realized that,

01:05:22.720 that it was up to me. Everything was up to me. Every bad thing that ever happened to me

01:05:28.720 happened because I made it happen. And, and there's nothing I could do to change that, but I,

01:05:35.500 I could affect what was going to happen to me in the future. And now that's the biggest thing.

01:05:40.540 It's powerful, man. Well, Hey, as we wind down on time, let me ask you a couple of different

01:05:46.420 questions here. The first one, what does it mean to be a man?

01:05:51.760 I was thinking about this because I knew I listened to your show.

01:05:54.620 You knew it was coming, man.

01:05:56.100 Knew it was coming, man. And so I came up with this, man. First thing is, and it's going to go

01:06:03.120 back to the slaying dragons concept. You're going to go through different stages of your life.

01:06:07.200 You're going to learn how to slay dragons. Somebody else is going to teach you how to slay dragons.

01:06:12.380 You are going to actually go out there and slay dragons. And then you are going to teach other

01:06:19.500 people how to slay dragons. And my definition of being a man is knowing when you should do each of

01:06:26.760 those things, knowing how to transition between each of those things, knowing when it's time to know,

01:06:32.160 knowing when it's time to learn, knowing when it's time to do and take action, and then knowing when

01:06:37.440 it's time to teach others to take action. That's awesome. That's such a great, it's a simple

01:06:42.560 framework, but it's a very, very powerful framework. I love it. All right, brother. How do we connect

01:06:47.180 with you and learn more about what you're doing? So my main website is up at www.warriorsoulagogi.com.

01:06:54.740 That's A-G-O-G-E. And then my main social media channel is on Instagram, at www.warriorsoulagogi, A-G-O-G-E.

01:07:02.640 Right on, man. We'll sync it all up. I really appreciate you, of course, your service to this

01:07:07.080 country and the lessons that you've shared, not only with us here, but on your social media and

01:07:13.440 our friendship as well. And I just commend you for all the work you've done and really honored to

01:07:17.320 have you on the show. Well, dude, the honor is all mine. And I just want to acknowledge you,

01:07:22.640 man. You are out there. You are fighting this battle. I consider you to be the, the, the, the

01:07:28.400 major, major bulkhead that is defending masculinity in our society. And, and I thank you for that.

01:07:36.600 Thanks, brother. It means a lot to me. Thank you, man.

01:07:41.220 Gents, there you go. My conversation with the one and only Chris Albert. I hope you enjoyed the

01:07:45.500 conversation. Uh, I really admire what Chris is doing. He's so humble. He's so down to earth. Uh,

01:07:51.560 very, very unassuming actually. And when you consider all of the wonderful things and,

01:07:55.820 and the tremendous success that he's had, not only in his personal life, but, um, also in helping

01:08:00.680 other individuals with theirs, uh, you've got to, you can't help, but be inspired by this guy.

01:08:05.060 So, uh, connect with him on social media, connect with me on social media. Let us know what you

01:08:09.540 thought about the podcast. If there's anything specific that you heard or that you learned,

01:08:13.940 and you are going to take that information, you're going to apply it in your life.

01:08:17.780 Please let both of us know, because that's fuel for the fire for us. We'd like hearing those stories.

01:08:23.920 We'd like to know that the message that we're sharing is resonating and ultimately,

01:08:27.280 and frankly, that it's helping. That's the most important thing. So, uh, connect with me on

01:08:32.240 Instagram and Twitter and Facebook all at Ryan Michler. My last name is spelled M I C H L E R.

01:08:38.440 Very, very active on Instagram. That's the platform I'm using most. And I would love to grow that

01:08:43.860 channel a little bit better and have you guys band with us there. And we'll continue this

01:08:48.920 conversation over there. All right, guys, thanks for being on the podcast. Please, if you would

01:08:53.520 leave a rating and review again, we're on track to have the highest downloaded month ever over a five

01:09:00.340 year period. And I need your help in making sure that happens. Your part is because I'm not hawking

01:09:05.480 a bunch of products and charging a bunch of stuff for the information we're sharing here.

01:09:09.340 Your part is to leave a rating and review and share this with a man that needs to hear the

01:09:16.020 message of order of man. All right, guys, get out there. We'll be back tomorrow until then take

01:09:20.180 action. I'm a man. Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take

01:09:26.300 charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order

01:09:30.960 of man.com.

Order of Man - January 21, 2020

Tapping Into Your Warrior Archetype ｜ CHRIS ALBERT

Episode Stats

Length

Words per Minute

Word Count

Sentence Count

Misogynist Sentences

Hate Speech Sentences

Summary

Transcript