Order of Man - The Benefits of Fatherhood, Fostering Mutual Understanding, and The Power and Pitfalls of Singular Focus

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart

00:00:04.980 your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.

00:00:10.420 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong. This is your life. This is

00:00:17.060 who you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,

00:00:22.780 you can call yourself a man. Kip, what's up man? Good to see you. I don't want to look as good

00:00:27.180 today because my video has been off, but maybe that walks out some of the blemishes.

00:00:33.080 Me too. I'm feeling a little banged up today. My nose and my face is all raw because I got back

00:00:40.060 to training after two weeks of hiatus. We had a little bit of COVID going around, so I wasn't

00:00:47.680 able to train for the last couple of weeks, but I went back yesterday. Your skin got all sensitive

00:00:52.580 and now it's weak and pathetic and paper thin, and so I got to rebuild the calluses on my face

00:00:59.420 as I get back into it. It's so true though. That is true. The thing that I'm glad about though,

00:01:06.840 actually, is that I don't, so far, I mean, I only went last night and this morning just to get back

00:01:11.920 into it. So far, I don't have any rawness on the top of my feet, which is horrible. You wouldn't

00:01:18.240 think, but it is horrible when you start rubbing the blisters on your feet and oh, I think I'm past

00:01:24.200 that stage though. Well, like a couple of weeks ago when I started training it back again, same

00:01:30.160 thing. And I, I usually carry band-aids in my bag. So that way, when I, after I shower, I can put

00:01:37.520 band-aids on, on my feet because what happens is I'll take a shower and if I don't have band-aids,

00:01:44.580 I put my shoes on and put my socks on and then I go to work. And then I get home and I rip my socks

00:01:51.460 off and it rips off all the scabs. It's so gross. I'm like, ah. I don't do band-aids. What I try to

00:01:57.720 do is I just try to stick my feet in people's face as often as I can when I'm rolling and I have

00:02:01.940 blisters and that seems to get them off me pretty quick. Yeah. Oh man. Anyhow, it's so funny. The

00:02:09.800 things that you, uh, the nuances of jujitsu that you don't realize, you know, they exist until you

00:02:15.540 start training. Well, you know, the other thing I was thinking about it today too, because this

00:02:19.560 morning I kind of lost my cool a little bit, like not bad, but just a little bit. Cause the, my,

00:02:26.520 my buddy Brody Kuzino that I trained with, he was like, just pounded on me. And, and I legit could

00:02:35.440 not do anything. I'm like, what in the hell is going on? And finally I was, I don't know if I

00:02:39.640 was able to sweep them or something. He was on top of me in side control and something, something we,

00:02:44.200 you know, where I, where I got in his side and I just like Hulk mode. And then, cause I was pissed.

00:02:52.600 And afterwards I was like, dude, I'm sorry. I, he's like, no, I just saw the beast. Like I need to

00:02:57.960 see the beast. And I'm like, I know, but I started thinking about it when I was on the drive home and I was

00:03:04.300 like, man, jujitsu grounds me like that. The reason I went into like beast mode where I was just

00:03:09.800 like, is because I haven't been doing it for two weeks. And so I had all this like aggression and

00:03:15.800 this frustration and this, whatever it is that we as men have built up inside of me. And I had no

00:03:22.320 outlet for two weeks and I finally have an outlet and I let it all come out at once as opposed to just

00:03:27.140 being calm and collected. And so, yeah, I lost my, lost my cool a little bit this morning. So

00:03:33.140 it's all good. It's good. Yeah. I had a guy last week. It was last Friday. We get done training.

00:03:39.420 He comes back after and goes, Hey, uh, did I do anything wrong? Like, did I, you know,

00:03:45.200 like, did I roll like an ass or anything? And I was like, no, but was I rolling? Like he's like,

00:03:52.300 Oh no. Oh, I don't know. I was just telling you, I was kind of nervous. Cause I felt like you're kind

00:03:57.220 of hurting me. I was like, sorry, man. Like I know I wasn't angry. That was just my default

00:04:05.400 meanness, I guess. I don't know. So, but it was kind of funny. Like there's a little bit of like,

00:04:10.400 is there tension between us? You know?

00:04:14.120 Actually, I think that's a pretty good sign of a, of a good training partner.

00:04:17.900 Somebody cause look, I mean, let's not pretend that we don't get pissed off or frustrated or want

00:04:23.900 to just exert our dominance when we're there. Of course. Like why, if you don't have that sort

00:04:28.600 of edge, you're not going to be good at all. That's why we're doing jujitsu. Right. Right.

00:04:34.620 But then a training partner, who's at least aware of it and says, Hey man, you know, like I lost my

00:04:39.900 cool or, you know, I shouldn't have done. I remember when you and I were at, at immersion camp and I put

00:04:44.960 like my forearm into your jaw or something. And I, there's no submission there. You're just like,

00:04:50.200 that's being a dick. But then you say it and you get it off your chest or whatever you say to the

00:04:56.320 guy. He's like, yeah, no worries. And I'm sorry. And you know, you hug it out and it's all good.

00:05:00.240 Right. So, yeah, but that is a sign of a good training partner. And I did a Friday field notes,

00:05:05.360 I think, or no, I did it in a, where was it? It was either Friday field. Oh yeah, it was a Friday

00:05:10.640 field notes. Who's your battle brother. And, and I talked about qualities to look for. I actually

00:05:16.080 think that's one. You want somebody who's willing to go hard, uh, but also has a level of humility

00:05:20.920 that says, you know what? I screwed up. Like, I'm sorry, my bad. Let's get back to it. Whether

00:05:26.300 it's jujitsu or just life in general. And I think that's a pretty good thing to look for because

00:05:30.260 you don't want somebody who's passive, who, who doesn't have that edge. You don't want somebody

00:05:34.120 like that. And you don't want somebody who's not humble enough to admit, Hey man, I screwed up.

00:05:39.700 Like, sorry about that. Let's fix it. Right. So yeah. Well, you got, you got to walk that line

00:05:43.980 and you can't deal with that. Right. You can't deal with a guy that loses his cool and they can't

00:05:48.440 own it. Cause like, how do you resolve that? Or how do you progress or whatever in that scenario?

00:05:54.480 Now he's walking with a chip on his shoulder. It's like, now you're dealing with ego. It's like,

00:05:57.980 oh man, it's, that's miserable. Yeah. That's my, my son went with me this morning and it was funny

00:06:03.680 cause we got done training and he's like, he was just laughing. I'm like, what are you laughing at?

00:06:07.460 He's like, I love watching you and Brody roll. And I'm like, why? He's like, cause it's funny.

00:06:12.800 Like watching you to go at it. And so when we got there, since we hadn't been training long,

00:06:18.000 I was like, Hey Brody, you just want to go like 50, 60% today or for the first role, like ease into

00:06:24.220 it. He's like, yeah, sure. And he like tried to pass my guard. I went to 70, you know, I tried to

00:06:28.900 sweep him. He went to 80. I tried to, you know, mount him. He goes to 90 and it's like in 30 seconds,

00:06:34.980 we're from 50 to 110%, you know? And Breckin was just laughing. He just thought it was so funny.

00:06:41.960 Yeah. You're like, Oh, nice light roll guys. Yeah. I was like, that was my, Oh, you were

00:06:46.880 going a hundred. I was going 50. That was, that was my 50. Sorry. I don't know. I guess

00:06:51.580 I'm just strong or something. Last story, last story. We promise on jujitsu, but last week

00:06:57.020 I was training with Marcus, you know, Marcus and, uh, and I've kind of like flopping to my

00:07:02.180 side, like cash, cash jujitsu, you know, like, I don't know, kind of lazy. And, um, I can't

00:07:12.300 remember the position, but positions change. And all of a sudden Marcus went from casual

00:07:17.940 to I'm going to hurt you, which is very likely that he will. Cause he's a total badass.

00:07:24.560 And, and my, my bean went right to survival. Like instantly I was just like, you know, I

00:07:32.720 was like crazy, you know? And then afterwards I was like, thank you. And he's like, yeah,

00:07:39.000 he's like, you're gonna go too light or whatever. And I was like, no, I, I needed the, the wake

00:07:44.620 up the reality role, you know? And I was like, okay, yeah, that was good. But he wasn't, but

00:07:50.320 what was great is he was able to do that. He wasn't mad. It was an angry. Yeah. It was

00:07:56.180 just going, going after that edge. Right. Like going, you know, not being light on me.

00:08:01.560 Right. And it's like stepping up our game. So Marcus is awesome. You know, the, the only

00:08:06.480 time I rolled with him is that time I came out, we had a couple of order of man guys

00:08:09.600 come out. We, we trained a little bit in the morning and I think I had him in like, I think

00:08:14.020 I had him in a Kimura and you know, it's a pretty neutral position, right? Unless you have

00:08:18.920 like a dominant position, I guess maybe, but it's pretty neutral. And I had him. And

00:08:24.000 within half a second, he had me, he just, in the Kimura. Yeah. Yeah. Punches through

00:08:30.100 and it gets you. Yeah. He's a strong guy too. So like that Kimura, you're like, and he's

00:08:37.580 like, no, no. All right. Enough jujitsu. Let's get into it. Yeah. Questions. So our world,

00:08:46.780 it's falling apart and I'm just, it's crazy. We'll probably get into that. We'll weave some

00:08:52.800 of that conversation into these questions. So we, you know, you guys had, you guys followed

00:08:59.240 Ryan at Ryan Mickler on Instagram. And when you posted, Hey, we're doing some AMA questions

00:09:05.620 on your Instagram, huge amount of guys replied, like 200 questions or something. It was cool.

00:09:10.860 It was crazy. So we still have some questions as a leftover from that original request. So

00:09:16.320 we're in Instagram at this moment. We'll see if we can get out of Instagram over to Facebook

00:09:20.140 or from into the iron council. All right. Cornerstone of America. Where do you see order of man

00:09:26.840 making the biggest impact over the next five years? And I do, I think we can call out, you

00:09:33.660 know, you had a, an app that you kind of almost like a call to action, you know, of, uh, a reach

00:09:40.440 out to guys like, Hey, we need a band together. Um, you know, maybe we make reference to, to

00:09:45.560 that, uh, episode, but I don't know. I'm not sure what you'd want to add to it, but yeah.

00:09:50.420 I mean, obviously we're in turbulent times. We're in disturbing times, I guess, depending on

00:09:54.920 what side of the fence that you sit on, you know, I see some real threats to our way of life. Um,

00:09:59.700 I don't want to get into any sort of like fear mongering or anything like that, but let's

00:10:04.320 be realistic. There's some real threats to the way that we have lived our lives from,

00:10:07.980 uh, encroachments on the first amendment, also on the second amendment. Uh, so, you know,

00:10:13.580 these are things that we need to be vigilant about and we need to be prepared for. And so

00:10:16.980 sometimes I've had people say, Oh, you know, you're, you're sounding like a cult. No, you know

00:10:21.120 what? I'm sounding like somebody who wants men to prepare themselves. And I'm not saying the

00:10:25.600 zombie apocalypse. I'm not saying the end of the world or world war three, but

00:10:28.980 I am saying that there are, uh, government officials who I think would love nothing more

00:10:35.820 than to strip away our first and second amendment rights and everything that go along with it.

00:10:39.540 I believe that's the case. And so we, as men need to band together, we need to be vigilant

00:10:44.440 about these things. We need to be prepared. We need to be influential and strong and credible and

00:10:49.320 independently wealthy. So there isn't that debt and all of that looming over our heads. These are all

00:10:54.420 things that we've been talking about, frankly, for six years now. Uh, in fact, I saw a

00:10:58.800 memory come up just this morning, uh, three years ago today, I finished sovereignty. I finished

00:11:05.640 writing sovereignty. So that was pretty cool to see that come up. And it's also more relevant

00:11:12.600 three years to the date later than it ever was. And we continue to see more and more men picking

00:11:18.100 that up and living by this idea of, of individual sovereignty, which I think is good. So to answer

00:11:23.640 the question, where do I see order of man going? I think we're going to do a lot of the same. I think

00:11:27.440 we're going to do it on a bigger scale, a grander scale. Uh, we're going to continue to work to get

00:11:31.480 incredible guests on the podcast who are going to share things that we may not all agree on,

00:11:37.600 but at least enlighten us and change our perspective and give us additional things to think about.

00:11:42.920 Uh, we're going to continue to grow the iron council and offer courses and programs and email

00:11:48.540 courses and things like this, that we've already been doing that will hopefully equip men with the

00:11:53.120 tools they need to take action. When I started order of man in March of 2015. So almost six years

00:12:00.300 now, my entire goal was to bridge the gap between what we know and what we do. And so I saw a lot of

00:12:06.920 organizations out there. I saw a lot of podcasts out there and magazines who were preaching information,

00:12:14.360 which was good, but I felt like it was only half the battle. Good. You know what you're supposed

00:12:18.980 to do now? Are you doing it? And the answer was no, it was overwhelmingly no. And so there was this

00:12:24.020 huge integrity gap between what we know and what we're actually doing. And when we started six years

00:12:29.540 ago, my, my goal was to bridge that gap between again, what we know and what we actually do.

00:12:35.540 Uh, so we've, we're, we're coming up with a battle planning app, which is going to be available. I,

00:12:40.500 I personally like to write my stuff down. You guys have seen this, uh, for those of you who want to do it

00:12:45.160 on the phone. You'll have that option battle planning app. We've got a leadership development

00:12:49.460 course being pro developed right now inside of the iron council that will be available.

00:12:55.020 And then we're also going to have an achievement and advancement initiative that will probably start

00:12:59.480 in the early part of Q2 this year, uh, which will hold men accountable and give them very clear

00:13:07.620 paths to run on, to improve their capabilities as men. Uh, but outside of that, and you and I were

00:13:12.540 talking about this before we hit record is I really think we need to get men together locally.

00:13:17.300 I've been, I know I've been talking about it for years. And at this point you might think,

00:13:21.440 okay, Ryan's just paying lip service to this thing. And frankly, I have up to this point

00:13:25.220 because I haven't really been all that interested in doing it because I realized the time commitment

00:13:30.360 that comes with it and the amount of capital and resources that I would need to pour into something

00:13:35.460 like that. Uh, but I think the time is, is here, you know, so we're going to be getting

00:13:40.020 a little bit more strategical in how we're going to implement these regional and local

00:13:45.900 meetups and they're going to be very structured. They're going to be very organized. We're going

00:13:49.780 to have guest speakers come in. We're going to make sure that it's not focused so heavily

00:13:55.440 on just lecturing at you. Cause you can go to church and get that. You can go to your

00:13:59.460 business conference and get that. And you'll hear, you know, 10 wonderful speakers, uh, throughout

00:14:04.240 the weekend and they'll tell you everything they need to do. And then you go and you're like,

00:14:07.080 okay, I'm hopped up, but I don't even actually know how to implement this stuff. Yeah. And I

00:14:10.760 think that's actually one of the things that makes our events so unique is yeah, we have some

00:14:15.640 guest speakers come in. We have some experts talk about some things and then it's like,

00:14:19.740 now let's go do, let's go train jujitsu. Let's go shoot archery. Uh, you know, let's have PT in the

00:14:26.640 morning. So it's a very active program. It's not just you being gabbed at for, you know, two or three

00:14:31.200 days. Uh, and we're going to implement these things with a regional and local chapters. Uh, and I expect

00:14:36.560 that to come online this year. There will be a format. There will be a structure. Uh, there will

00:14:42.580 be themes so that you and me and the hopefully tens, if not hundreds of thousands or millions of

00:14:49.040 men who decide to start getting involved in these things. We're all working collectively, whether

00:14:53.200 you're in Australia or the UK or our many Canadian brothers or here in the United States, we're all

00:14:59.500 going to be working on the same thing so that, uh, the, the directives and the information,

00:15:04.620 the ideas are very clear and we're very much in unison with what we're learning, discussing

00:15:08.540 and acting on. So these are some things I'm talking about loosely and broadly right now.

00:15:13.020 I get it. Uh, but these are some things that have been on my radar and I think it's time

00:15:16.640 to start pulling the trigger. Exciting. I'm excited. Yeah, no, it's exciting. It's great.

00:15:23.420 That's overwhelming. Frankly, for me, I'm like, Oh, when it, even when I talk about it,

00:15:27.020 I'm overwhelmed because I've got enough things and, you know, also I want to be a dad. I want

00:15:33.900 to be a good husband, you know? So I hear me talk about even just like hear me, hear me saying it.

00:15:40.280 And I'm, I'm not making any sort of irrational or misguided expectations about the level of

00:15:47.580 investment and resources this is going to take, which is why I haven't done it up to this point,

00:15:52.220 but it's becoming more serious. Yeah. That's needed. All right. Jay Crussell,

00:15:59.060 what distractions did you face in 2020 and have you carried over so far into 2021?

00:16:08.340 I don't get distracted. I really don't. I mean, yeah, maybe I want to watch a TV show or something

00:16:16.060 at night or, you know, maybe initially with COVID, I was like, Oh man, how's this going to change

00:16:22.620 everything? And, um, it actually caused us to cancel, not cancel, cancel, postpone two different

00:16:27.900 events that we ended up having one later on, you know? So there was little things like that, but

00:16:32.960 I'm not easily deterred or distracted. Like my wife could attest to that. It takes me a while

00:16:39.900 sometimes to lock onto things, but when I lock onto something, it's usually that's it. Yeah.

00:16:46.900 That's it. You know? So it does take me a minute to lock onto something, but man, once I've made that

00:16:51.740 decision, I actually get tunnel vision and maybe that's a bit of a problem. You know, my, I think

00:16:58.120 everybody's a little different personalities. I'm an obsessive personality, you know? So if I find

00:17:03.060 something to latch onto, I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed right now with jujitsu. We talk about it every week.

00:17:08.540 I'm obsessed with my canoe that I'm building. I'm obsessed with what we're going to be doing

00:17:13.680 here with order of man. I'm obsessed. That's my personality. And it could actually, in a lot of

00:17:18.860 instances be a detriment. I realized that. And it also allows me to achieve a lot. And other men have

00:17:24.640 to deal with being maybe a little bit distracted or even flippant about things or, or, or easily

00:17:31.160 entertained. And, you know, that's a challenge for a lot of guys, but that's not, that's never been

00:17:36.940 something I've ever dealt with. Even from the time I was little, like I could lock in, dial it in.

00:17:42.320 I'm all in at the expense of everything else, which is a real challenge for me at times.

00:17:46.400 Yeah. And the people that, that I love and want to serve, you know, my wife and my kids,

00:17:50.280 they feel the pain of that because I do get latched onto something and they feel that they

00:17:55.020 feel neglected at times. And I have to have those conversations and I have to find a way to balance it.

00:17:59.760 But distraction is not one I deal with. So for me to tell you, oh, I get distracted to all these

00:18:03.980 things would be disingenuous. If I had to guess, there's probably a lot of guys listening

00:18:08.840 that would say the political climate and the politics around COVID and the news and the noise.

00:18:18.280 And I don't even know if I should call it noise might be considered a distraction, right? Like,

00:18:23.260 and, and I fall into that a little bit. Like sometimes I'll, I have a strong opinion about

00:18:27.200 something and I'll see someone post something on Facebook and then I'll be like, yeah, man,

00:18:30.820 you're wrong. And you know what I mean? I'll get wrapped up and do it. But in the same breath,

00:18:35.000 like, and, and I'm changing this guy's question a little bit in the same breath. Like I also feel

00:18:41.160 like there's a level of like, Hey, you know what I mean? Like we should say something too. Right.

00:18:46.580 And so I find that a distraction, at least for me, any, any advice or thoughts, you know what I mean?

00:18:54.800 For guys that kind of get wrapped up into the politics of things.

00:18:57.800 Well, you said I should say something in some instances. I mean, that's not really the full

00:19:03.940 thought. The full thought should be, I should, if I care about it. Yeah. Right. Like if it's

00:19:09.940 relevant to me, for example, if somebody says something that I don't agree with regards to

00:19:14.980 how men show up or how they should show up or, you know, the kind of men they are. And somebody

00:19:19.640 says something like that, I'm probably going to engage with that because that's a relevant

00:19:23.200 discussion for me, you know, other, other, and I, sometimes it's just exposure. I deal with this

00:19:29.140 stuff every day where people are, you know, coming at me from different angles with different things.

00:19:32.980 I'm like, what the hell are you even talking about? And, and I Frank, I don't care what they're

00:19:37.640 talking about. And, and I've learned over time not to engage because I know what I'm going after

00:19:44.380 and getting drawn into a debate with a troll. And there's different spectrums of trolls,

00:19:49.860 but getting drawn into a debate with a troll, isn't actually going to help me move the needle

00:19:55.520 towards my objective. So I guess the point would be why, you know, if, if, if a, if a guy gets,

00:20:05.340 gets into a debate or an argument with you, I actually have a rule because I'm all about

00:20:08.740 boundaries. I break the rule occasionally and it never goes well when I break the rule.

00:20:13.200 But the rule is look, if, if somebody wants to have a civil discourse on social media about

00:20:19.240 something that's relevant to me, I will do that. But the minute I sense any sort of

00:20:24.760 hostility or intellectual dishonesty, or just game playing, I have one simple rule.

00:20:32.760 It's a one response maximum. So if somebody comes back and says something, and I feel like I need to

00:20:38.080 say something or get it off my chest, I will respond once. And in my mind, I'm like, regardless

00:20:43.900 of what this person says back or what they come back with, I've already reached my limit on responses.

00:20:49.420 I have a one response maximum. When I start to get some of that disingenuousness or that troll

00:20:54.360 like behavior and that little boundary, believe it or not, very simple has saved me hundreds,

00:21:01.540 if not thousands of hours over the past six years of getting drawn into bullshit that has no relevancy in

00:21:07.740 my life or my mission. Yeah. Cause it can be never ending. And then in the end, you're like,

00:21:13.060 okay, so I'm trying to convince this one guy that's not even intelligent enough to like

00:21:17.760 understand or work through his thought process to a conclusion. So how do I even

00:21:24.620 It might not even be a guy. You might actually be arguing with a bot. Like you legitimately could

00:21:29.820 be arguing with a bot. Yeah. Code. How stupid, you know? So we got to be very careful and protect

00:21:37.200 our time. I actually had one guy, this was months ago. He came back and said, I don't really care

00:21:41.060 what you say or I'm just getting paid to do this. Really? Yeah. I don't know if he was lying or

00:21:47.260 telling the truth, but to me, that was enough of a like, whoop. What? Okay. So he's not even

00:21:54.740 again, disingenuous. He's not there for the discussion. He's there. Maybe, I don't know

00:22:00.820 if this is true or not, but what he said is he's there because he's getting paid. That's enough for

00:22:05.440 me to disengage. There's nothing that I could say or do. That would be like a gotcha. Yeah. Yeah.

00:22:11.240 It's, it's just a waste of time. Now we're talking about it on social media, but there might be real

00:22:17.020 life conversations, you know, somebody at work, a colleague might come to you and say, Hey, can I talk

00:22:22.220 with you about that? And you know, you're not interested in that. Shut it down. Yeah. Hey,

00:22:27.480 you know what? Like I can appreciate, you know, you want to talk about the game or whatever. I've

00:22:31.000 got these, you know, a hundred tasks I need to do today. So, and plus I don't care about the game

00:22:37.440 or if you care about the game, maybe it's like, Hey, let's talk about that tonight over beers.

00:22:41.540 But right now I got to work, you know, like have these boundaries in place and know yourself enough

00:22:47.360 to know what you get distracted with, know what your prize is, what you're actually going after.

00:22:52.220 And to hell with everything else.

00:22:54.060 I like it. All right. Mr. J Wilson, 88. At what point do you stop pushing for more

00:23:02.080 and begin to enjoy life and passions more? When is enough enough when it comes to pursuing

00:23:09.340 more money, bigger career moves, et cetera?

00:23:14.280 Read, read the first part of that question again.

00:23:17.360 Yeah. At what point do you stop pushing for more and begin to enjoy your life and passions

00:23:23.640 more? Pause right there. Why are those at odds with each other?

00:23:28.020 Yeah. You're talking about, I assume you're talking about financial success, career endeavors,

00:23:33.600 career pursuits. Why is that at odds with something that you enjoy and you're passionate about?

00:23:38.160 That's the real question. Why are the, why do I view these two things as opposites that are

00:23:44.920 conflicting over and fighting over each other? I don't feel that way. Like when we grow the podcast

00:23:51.220 or I grow my bank account or we enlist new members in the iron council or sell new merchandise or whatever

00:23:57.500 it is, I'm making more money. This is a business. I don't make any qualms about that. I'm, I'm gaining

00:24:03.000 and garnering more attention and more credibility and influence. Oh. And also I really actually love

00:24:09.180 what I do. I love doing this. I love having these conversations Kip with you. I like talking with

00:24:15.840 these guys that I've never met that are interesting and fascinating to me. I like giving you the tools

00:24:21.260 and resources that you need to lead yourselves and the people you care about. Well, I like that.

00:24:25.460 And I like making a lot of money doing it. And they're not at odds with each other. They're not.

00:24:31.260 And I think that's part of the reason that people like what it is we're doing is like,

00:24:34.840 I'm never going to shy away from saying, look, I'm adding value. I'll exchange. I'll trade with

00:24:39.280 you. You give me money and I'll give you whatever it is that you're after. And you're not after it.

00:24:43.640 You don't have to give me money voluntary. That's fine. I think people like that because again,

00:24:48.800 it's genuine, right? It's it, there's, there's no sort of a secret, weird elephant in the room

00:24:54.500 that nobody really wants to talk about. You know, every once in a while, people will calculate

00:24:58.240 how much money I make based on the number of iron council members. And I don't care if you,

00:25:03.300 yeah, calculate it. That doesn't matter to me. What matters to me is I'm providing enough value

00:25:10.540 that you feel like it's worth purchasing. That's what matters to me. So I think you really ought to

00:25:15.980 question why you feel like your financial success, your career pursuits are at odds with your enjoyment

00:25:25.320 of life. I don't think they should be. I think they should be very much in alignment and very

00:25:30.540 paralleled. And you're going to live a much more enriched, fulfilled life when you do that.

00:25:35.880 Now that said, you know, I've, I've hired people over the past, even 12 months where we've started

00:25:40.660 to bring the right people in, um, to handle different aspects of my business that I don't

00:25:45.760 enjoy or that I need to leverage. So I can free up my time to pursue other endeavors within the

00:25:50.600 organization, or, you know, maybe I just want to take the afternoon off. And here's a prime example,

00:25:56.540 Kip, you and I were talking before this podcast, I'm going to be traveling for the next week.

00:26:00.240 So I asked if you would host one of our iron council team calls, I want to be there,

00:26:06.020 but I also want to travel a little bit. So I'm going to go travel. You're going to hold the meeting

00:26:10.280 down and it's all, it's going to be great. And they're not at odds with each other. So I'm going to

00:26:15.720 continue to pursue. I'm not stopping ever. Um, it's a hard question for me to answer.

00:26:22.180 Yeah. And you're creating an opportunity for me that I'm excited about, right? Like we were both

00:26:29.140 benefiting from that example. Let me ask you this, Ryan, because sometimes, you know, and I use this

00:26:34.060 example, I know two guys that work, I need to be careful that work for the same company. And if you

00:26:40.600 ask the one guy, he's like best job in the world, like literally like loves his job. The other guy's

00:26:47.420 like worst job in the world and literally thinks it's like the worst thing in the world. They do the

00:26:52.520 same thing. Right. And so how much, and, and I, I can't help, but look at this and say, okay,

00:26:58.360 we can reply to Jay Wilson, 88 here and say, Hey dude, change your job, do something that aligns

00:27:04.880 with your passions. And, but part of me also says, uh, mindset, like, why can't you enjoy whatever

00:27:11.380 it is that you are doing as well? Like where, where do you draw the line there of, you know,

00:27:17.720 aligning your passions to your job versus having the correct mindset? And what recommendation would

00:27:23.000 you give around that? Well, so I, so remember when I told you about the reminder that I saw on

00:27:28.880 the book that it's been three years since I finished it. So I just made a quick post. I shared the

00:27:33.840 memory and I made a quick post on, on Facebook and I said in the post itself, I said, I actually

00:27:39.820 really hated and, and did disliked the writing process. But you know what? I'm proud of hell,

00:27:45.800 proud as hell that I wrote the book. I know people needed to receive it in the written word.

00:27:52.820 So although I didn't enjoy the writing process, it was part of the, the mission.

00:27:59.420 Yeah. It wasn't my favorite part, but the fact that it's getting out there to people is valuable

00:28:05.080 to me. So, you know, look, I know we've said it in the past and I've kind of been rethinking is like,

00:28:10.360 well, it's really about how you approach it. And you could really love this job. I don't know if you

00:28:14.400 could love everything that you ever did just because you had the right mindset. I think that's

00:28:20.580 a little bit utopian. Yeah. A little bit fairy tale-ish. Like if you just believe it, it will

00:28:26.460 be good for you. Like, but you know what? I do believe that you could just frame it and say,

00:28:32.420 you know what? This sucks, but it's going to help me on the path to something better.

00:28:38.300 I don't, for example, I don't like deadlifts. I don't, I don't enjoy them at all, but I do deadlifts

00:28:45.180 because I want to be strong and I want to be capable and I want to have strong legs and I want

00:28:49.440 to apply it to jujitsu. And I want to see my kids or I want my kids to see me doing things that are

00:28:55.920 hard and challenging. There's a lot of reasons that I'll do it in spite of not enjoying it all that

00:29:02.280 much. So like, what's more important to you? You liking everything that you do or you achieving

00:29:10.300 ultimate success, the success that you're after. And sometimes that means we need to do some things

00:29:14.960 we don't like. Yeah. So where, so where, where the job ends up becoming the means for you to enjoy

00:29:22.960 life. Yeah. That's it. You know? So like, again, I I'm, I'm, I'm trying to be more careful of just

00:29:30.740 being utile, like believe it into existence and enjoy it. And it will, I can't stand that. I hear

00:29:37.740 people like that every day on Instagram and YouTube. I'm like, shut up. Like, where's the people who are

00:29:42.760 being realistic? Look, I know what it's like to do some shitty job. I know what it's like to do

00:29:47.060 something you don't like and enjoy. I know what it's like to have a boss who's an asshole. I know

00:29:50.500 all that stuff. I'm not going to tell you if you just be, if you were just better that everything

00:29:55.140 would be awesome. No, it just means that you've got to bear down and get through it to get onto

00:29:58.700 something else. That to me is realistic. Well, and, and, and to your point that you're making

00:30:03.240 earlier, it's like, you know, that's realistic. And it's also realistic that running that marathon

00:30:08.460 sucked ass, but guess what? It felt good when I was done. It felt really good. And it felt really

00:30:14.560 good doing irrigation work in the middle of the morning when I was done. Yeah. What did it feel

00:30:20.160 good in the moment? Right. But when I was done, it felt great. Yeah. Right. All right. Uh, I am Danny

00:30:28.580 boy. Hey, Danny boy. How can I deal with the bad habits and negative traits cultivated from growing up

00:30:35.360 in my family environment and overcome those and be a better example in my future household when I

00:30:41.380 marry and have a family? You answered the question. Bad habits and negative traits. Yeah. You already

00:30:46.960 answered the question. You used a word in there. That word was environment. How do I deal with the

00:30:53.660 negative habits and the traits and characteristics that I learned in the environment while I was growing

00:30:58.220 up? Change your environment. That's it. You learned it in that environment. So get a new environment

00:31:04.380 and you're going to learn new skills. So find people who are successful, read good books,

00:31:09.480 listen to good podcasts, go to conferences, go to courses, identify the men and women who are thriving

00:31:15.680 and succeeding in your area, band with them, offer value to them, ask them to mentor you, pay them for

00:31:23.200 coaching, change your environment in every way. For example, how, how could you, let's say you're,

00:31:30.600 let's say you're, you're, you're 50 pounds overweight. How could you go to the gym? Just go. Cause you

00:31:39.380 want to be present in there. How could you go to the gym and not have some of that enthusiasm and

00:31:47.620 discipline and grit rub off on you? It it's impossible. It's impossible not to be impacted

00:31:59.220 by your environment. So start to identify better environments and thrust yourself in as uncomfortable

00:32:07.120 as they are. And they are uncomfortable. You know, I've been to meetings where we're networking events,

00:32:13.160 or even just things that I like events that I think I should be at for one reason or the other.

00:32:17.140 And I don't know anybody. I go by myself and I feel so dumb. I walk in the room and everybody's

00:32:23.240 chumming up to each other, buddy, buddy. And they're telling like inside jokes and stories.

00:32:28.400 And I'm like, yeah, that was cool. You know, but I go because that's where the winners are. I want to

00:32:33.860 be around the winners. And then the next time I go, I'm in the circle, you know, now, now I'm telling,

00:32:39.560 hey, remember when so-and-so did this last year? Remember when we went to that restaurant?

00:32:43.520 I get to be in the inner circle this year, but it takes you going the first year where you don't

00:32:48.260 know anybody and you feel like a fool. Yeah. Starting forced conversation. Hi, my name's Ryan.

00:32:54.460 Right. But you do it. You just do it. You know, like if I came up to you, if I look, if I saw you at a

00:33:01.120 function and I'm like, oh, that guy looks successful. I would actually walk up to you and I'd be like,

00:33:05.180 hey, I saw your shirt. I, you know, I'm not familiar with that. Protect, provide, preside. What is that?

00:33:10.260 Yeah. What a great icebreaker. Totally. Easy. Now I got to talk about myself. Oh,

00:33:15.660 there's this weird guy from Parowan, Utah. You said it wrong. It's not Parowan. It's Parowan.

00:33:22.540 Oh, Parowan. Sorry. Dang. Come on. South Sevier. I thought you would, or no, not South Sevier.

00:33:28.160 Where are you from? What's Monroe? Monroe. Elsinore, actually. Elsinore. Okay. All right.

00:33:33.880 Yeah. All South Sevier. Shipped you guys in. So you'd have enough, enough guys to play on the

00:33:39.320 football, the football team. Yeah. Grab all the nearby towns. We probably could have played,

00:33:45.360 what is it? Nine man football. When I got to Parowan, I remember, I, you know, every school

00:33:52.660 has their trophy cases or whatever lining the halls. Yeah. And I saw things for, I think it was,

00:33:58.020 I think it was nine, maybe even seven. It was like seven or nine man. I can't remember exactly

00:34:02.860 what it was. And I'm like, really? What is that? Yes. Seven man football. Yes. Or whatever.

00:34:07.820 They had a league. I didn't even know that was a thing.

00:34:09.040 Because it was Parowan and Milford and Beaver, probably South Sevier was probably there at some

00:34:15.320 point. Yeah. So these small rural Southern Utah towns. Anyways, I think we answered the question,

00:34:20.280 change your environment. Yeah. Okay. Curse done. How do you create a better network? Which steps and

00:34:28.700 approaches would be better? Is it similar to the previous question, right? Like change your environment

00:34:34.860 is how you build a good network and surrounding yourself with those key individuals, maybe

00:34:38.860 strategies around it. I'm trying to give people like the benefit of the doubt. And so with all due

00:34:43.640 respect, you know, I think you probably already know how to do it. It's just not comfortable to,

00:34:49.380 to reach out to somebody is not comfortable to go to a business function or a networking group is not

00:34:56.120 comfortable to see that there's a conference coming up that you really think you probably ought to be at

00:35:01.560 for one reason or the other, but you don't know anybody else there. Uh, or to get, here's a silly

00:35:07.300 one. You get invited on a hunt. Okay. And most people hear that and they think, uh, huh? Like I

00:35:13.300 would go do that. But would you, like, if you didn't know anybody and somebody invited you, would

00:35:18.680 you be willing to do that? Something you actually really enjoy? Would you get over yourself long

00:35:24.580 enough to go do it? I've done that. And I've been on hunts, probably half a dozen hunts where I

00:35:29.340 didn't know a single person and they invited me for whatever reason. I'm like, yeah, let's do it.

00:35:34.280 And it's been so rewarding and enriching, not just for the hunt itself, but because of the

00:35:38.360 connections that I make. So I think when it comes to networking, you probably just ought to say yes

00:35:43.140 to a bunch more things with other people than you would normally say yes to. And, and I would say,

00:35:49.660 if you have a hard time connecting and networking with people, then your default answer, when it comes to

00:35:54.740 questions about being around other people, Hey, do you want to come, come out for drinks? Hey,

00:35:59.500 do you want to go to the game? Hey, we've got this extra person for a golf foursome, uh, or we're

00:36:05.040 going to go to this conference or, Hey, you know, at lunch people around the water cooler, like, Hey,

00:36:10.280 we're going to go over to, you know, Johnny's for lunch today. Like your default answer. If this is a

00:36:15.520 rough thing for you, probably just ought to be yes. And just deal with the pain for a little while

00:36:19.880 and you'll get better at it. Yeah. I'm not a naturally extroverted person. I'm really not.

00:36:25.720 I could be completely content being in my house, being around the property, going down into my

00:36:31.380 basement, working on projects. I could, I could do that forever. And people say, well, you know,

00:36:36.480 but you're doing this podcast. Yes. Because I'm not defined by being an introvert. I would,

00:36:43.080 I just get a lot of value from being alone and working on my own things. But I also realize that I

00:36:47.460 have goals and ambitions that are going to take me putting myself into these kinds of environments

00:36:51.840 as risky as it can be around other people. And so it's not that I'm incapable of doing it.

00:36:57.860 And you're not incapable of doing it. It's just that you have to get over yourself long enough to

00:37:01.900 go do it and stop saying, well, I'm an introvert. Are you, or are you just kind of introverted and

00:37:07.000 awkward around people like everybody else on the planet? Yeah. Totally. All right. There's the

00:37:15.180 designed man. What got you interested in building a canoe?

00:37:22.460 I don't know.

00:37:25.940 An ad on Facebook. You're like, that would be cool.

00:37:28.420 Probably. No, I'll tell you.

00:37:30.060 You made a reference of like an ancestor or something that, that, uh, that was, I didn't

00:37:34.960 find that out until after though, actually. Oh, really? Oh, yeah. So I'll explain that story

00:37:39.120 here in a second. But, um, my wife and I and our kids spent a lot of time, uh, at the lake this year,

00:37:45.600 which is interesting. Cause I mean, we're from Southern Utah, the desert, there's no water in

00:37:49.180 the desert. So we're, we've never been lake people. You know how there's lake people. You know what I'm

00:37:54.380 talking about, right? Like we've never been a lake family ever. There's, there's also like mountain

00:37:59.920 families and snow families. Like we're, we're a mountain family. So we'd go up to the cabin and we'd

00:38:05.400 spend time on land. So this year though, being here in Maine with water around every bend,

00:38:10.780 we spent a ton of time at the lake and I went and bought, uh, a month or two into the season.

00:38:16.940 I went and bought, uh, one of those lifestyle canoes, those like plastic canoes. They're,

00:38:22.200 they're really nice. So we went and bought one and we loved it, man. Life. What did I say? Lifestyle?

00:38:28.440 Yes. Lifetime. Yeah. Lifetime. Yeah. Yeah. Um, and we loved it. We loved it. Like we had so much

00:38:35.060 fun, just paddling. And I remember going out to the lake and there was these rocks that were kind

00:38:39.400 of sticking out of the water. And I paddled over there, I think with my daughter, my youngest son,

00:38:43.680 and there was a snapping turtle sitting on the rock. So we try to see how close we get to, you

00:38:48.580 know, like we just enjoyed it. We, we went around one bend and there was a bald eagle in the tree.

00:38:53.200 We just really, really enjoyed it. And then I was, I was canoeing back one time or paddling back one

00:38:58.240 time. Um, I thought, man, wouldn't this be awesome in a canoe? And I was like, okay, I could just go

00:39:05.040 buy one, but that's lame. Go build one. So I started looking for plants and I've had this idea

00:39:11.420 for six months, maybe even longer than that, but it just kind of came to fruition. I'm like, all right,

00:39:15.320 just, just do it. Just do. And I've been telling my wife forever, I'm going to do this. I'm going to

00:39:19.280 do this. And she's like, don't, don't usually she's very encouraging of all my pursuits. She was

00:39:24.820 actually very discouraging on this one, but she was doing it from a good place. She knows what it's

00:39:30.140 going to mean. Yeah. You're going to be stuck out in the shed for the next six months building a canoe.

00:39:34.060 Well, no, she thought I had so many other projects and things that I would, maybe I would

00:39:38.980 start, but I would never finish. Like she knows me pretty well. And, and she's like, don't just do

00:39:44.560 this first, do that first. And there's some little odds in it. I made her a deal because I believe

00:39:49.700 in honoring, you know, what she, her desires as well, you know? So I'm like, all right, I'm going

00:39:55.020 to do these few projects and things around the house. And when I get that done, then I'm going to

00:39:59.780 do the canoe. She's like, okay. So I cranked those out and got the canoe and it's been a good

00:40:04.700 process, man. In fact, I got the tools that I needed, uh, just last night. So I'm going to be

00:40:08.960 working on it, which is phase three, uh, steaming and shaping the stems, which is the front and back

00:40:14.060 of the boat. I'll be doing that this afternoon and tonight, which is cool. I'm looking forward to

00:40:17.900 steaming. So you literally steam them. So you steam them. They bend. Yeah. You steam them. Uh,

00:40:23.260 you use an electric teapot and you steam them in a, you get like a PVC pipe and you put the stems

00:40:29.760 in the PVC pipe and put a rag underneath and a rag at top. So the steam can't escape. And then you

00:40:35.220 keep it in there for about 20 minutes and it makes them pliable. And then you take it out and you

00:40:39.760 literally have about 45 seconds to get it on the mold. And then you clamp it at different parts of the

00:40:44.920 mold. So it clamps its, its bend. And then it dries for about 24 hours. And then you take it

00:40:51.880 off of the clamps and you, uh, you put a string around the end. So it keeps its shape and you let

00:41:02.220 it dry for another 24 hours because all the air circulates and dries it. And then you glue them

00:41:06.880 together. Then you secure it to the craft. Then you shave it and shape it the way you want it to match

00:41:11.600 the front end of the boat and back end. Why not glue it and hammer it? Why it's pliable?

00:41:18.580 Why take it off? And because it, I don't exactly know, but the way that the fibers work,

00:41:25.520 it needs to be completely dried for the glue. Cause there, when you're doing the stem,

00:41:29.380 there's actually three strips of wood. So to apply the glue and to have it hold the way that it needs

00:41:35.620 to hold, it needs to be completely dry. The fibers actually need to dry in that shape.

00:41:41.600 So you need to let them dry out completely before you glue it. Then you stick them back together

00:41:46.520 and that glue holds better when they're dry. I I'm not the best guy to answer, but based on my

00:41:52.100 research, that's what it said. Yeah. I do. I, when, when you said you were getting a canoe,

00:41:56.680 I was like, that's so awesome. I don't even know what movie I've seen is like some national

00:42:01.100 geographic movie, but I saw something once where someone like cut down a tree and they built like

00:42:06.480 carved out a canoe. And I was like, that is so awesome. I was like, that would be the coolest

00:42:12.920 thing ever. Yeah. There's some, there's some amazing, like some amazing artists and craftsmen

00:42:20.440 and people have introduced me to people. And there's this guy, in fact, I'll give him a shout

00:42:24.480 out real quick because he has some really cool stuff on Instagram. So if you're interested

00:42:30.940 and like any craft and hobby that I've found in my life, the community is always so open

00:42:39.000 and receptive. Like, have you noticed that whether it's shooting or hunting or jujitsu

00:42:43.820 or this or that, like the community is always so excited to have somebody else who's interested

00:42:47.860 in it. So this guy's name is Trent Presler. Uh, and he's, he's on his bio, Instagram bio,

00:42:54.520 it says wooden boat builder, winery CEO, the boats that he makes are unbelievable. So it's,

00:43:02.220 it's Presler P R E S Z L E R woodshop, Presler woodshop. It's awesome. So a bunch of people introduced

00:43:10.740 me to him and I sent him a message. He's coming out with a new book. He sent me a link to it.

00:43:14.360 I picked it up, but I sent a message to him and I said, Hey Trent, you know, I just started doing

00:43:18.460 this thing. Um, I've been following you, a bunch of people introduced me, your work's beautiful,

00:43:23.160 you know, that kind of thing. And he, and he was so receptive. He's like, yeah, I saw that you're

00:43:26.540 building, you're making great progress. If you have questions, like shoot me a message, I'll give

00:43:30.820 you some insight. Like I said, way, way receptive and helpful. That's cool. That's really cool.

00:43:37.120 All right. That goes back to the networking thing. Let me tie that back into that. Yeah. You're scared

00:43:41.500 that people aren't going to accept you, right? Because what if I told you that to whatever

00:43:46.860 networking event you went to, you're going to receive a hundred percent reception. People are

00:43:51.280 going to roll out the red carpet for you. They're going to embrace you. They're going to ask you a

00:43:55.000 bunch of questions. They're, they're going to love you. And I guaranteed that would happen a hundred

00:43:59.680 percent of the time. How many events would you go to all of them? Yeah. So why don't you? Because

00:44:05.520 you don't think that will happen. You think you're going to be ostracized. You're going to feel

00:44:10.260 uncomfortable. People are looking at you weird. They're not going to include you in the thing.

00:44:14.540 That's what you think. That's not actually reality. Everything that I've ever been to that is,

00:44:21.100 that is centered or focused on some sort of centralized mission or purpose or craft or hobby

00:44:26.860 or activity. People are receptive. They want you there and they will embrace you. They will embrace you.

00:44:33.540 They want you to be there. So be there. Yeah. That's funny. All right. And also one more thing.

00:44:41.020 Sorry. I got to say this also. Nolan Dove. Nolan, I'm going to get to your question. I promise.

00:44:45.760 But I got to say one other thing. So there's this weird thing. Okay. And it happens a lot

00:44:49.500 in our church culture, Kip, where I'll move. So, so our church, it's, it's international,

00:44:56.700 right? I can go anywhere and have a chapel and a ward anywhere I go. Okay. And I hear people say,

00:45:03.640 oh, well, you know, I moved to New Mexico and, and, oh, we came from Maine and we just loved

00:45:11.560 everybody at church. And then we moved to New Mexico and nobody, nobody even welcomed us and

00:45:16.340 nobody even like reached out and fellowshiped. I'm like, it's not their responsibility. Okay. Look,

00:45:21.480 sure. They should do that. Would it be nice? Yeah. Yes. They should do that. And anybody who,

00:45:28.280 you know, is, is welcome, like people should do that. You should include people,

00:45:32.040 but it's also not their responsibility. It's your responsibility to insert yourself into the culture.

00:45:40.840 I've had people ask me, oh, how do you know so many people in Maine? And what,

00:45:44.200 because I insert myself into the culture. We're involved in sports. We're involved with other things.

00:45:51.060 I'm friendly to people. I go out and I reach out to my neighbors. We give them gifts. They give us

00:45:55.840 gifts. We look after each other. I ask questions. I ask for introductions. I make introductions.

00:46:01.700 I insert myself into the dynamic of the culture and people have embraced me. I had people when I

00:46:07.840 moved here who said, oh, you know, you're from away or you're a flatlander. People really won't

00:46:13.500 welcome you here. I found that to be the furthest thing from the truth. Interesting.

00:46:18.300 Because I didn't give them an option. Yeah. I said, you're going to welcome me because I'm

00:46:23.120 going to be part of this. You don't have an option as to whether or not I'm around. I'm going to be

00:46:26.740 here. So we might as well be friends, but there's too many of us are so passive and like, oh, what if

00:46:32.780 it is? What if they, yeah, well, you know, what if, but the overwhelming majority of people will

00:46:38.920 embrace you, will like you, will challenge you, will help you. You just got to put yourself out there.

00:46:44.360 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you never know like why they're not reaching out. Right. Like

00:46:49.660 you, you walk into the neighborhood and you're like, oh, they think they're better than we are.

00:46:54.340 You know, like who knows their story? You know what I mean? Like, like, why would you go there?

00:46:58.820 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's crazy. All right.

00:47:04.620 All right. We're ready. Okay. Nolan. Oh, wait, one more thing.

00:47:07.440 All right. Nolan, what do you got, man? I love how we think we're funny and everyone else. We're

00:47:13.960 not funny. These guys are idiots. All right. We're dad. We're dad joke funny. That's like

00:47:18.720 the extent of it. All the daughters and the boys and the sons are rolling their eyes because their

00:47:23.300 dads are making the same jokes we're making right now. Although I have a dad joke. That's like the

00:47:28.040 best of all dad jokes at one time when appropriate, we should, we should do an episode. Nolan's like,

00:47:34.860 guys, bro, just get to my question, please. It's a good question. What kind of bow do you shoot?

00:47:42.820 I shoot. Oh, I don't have it here. It's downstairs. I shoot the Hoyt RX one.

00:47:48.820 There you go. All right. Goody. I guess I could give you, I don't know. Does he want more

00:47:54.180 specs? I think it's a, I think it's a, I think I should know this, but I think my draw is a 28 and

00:48:02.660 a half or 29 inch draw. It's dialed into 70 pounds and I shoot. Usually I will shoot the

00:48:11.380 knock to it by John Dudley, but I just got his new wrist strap release, which is kind of an

00:48:17.700 interesting take on the wrist strap release. It's actually a tension release, but it's a wrist

00:48:22.840 strap. It's called the back strap. So I just bought that. So I'm interested to try that out.

00:48:26.760 It does away with target panic. Uh, I use the spot hog, uh, single pin. It's actually a double pin,

00:48:33.840 but set up like a single pin, um, site. And I shoot, uh, FMJs.

00:48:43.160 There you go. And I changed my broadheads, usually rage, rage broadheads, uh, expandables,

00:48:47.820 but I've thought about going to fixed broadheads as well. I don't know. That's what I shoot now.

00:48:52.440 Seems to work pretty well. So is in bow culture, is there, uh, you know, like, Oh, you, uh, 70 pounds,

00:48:59.960 you know, I, I, my draws, uh, my draws a 34, 90 pound. Yes. Not so much the draw length. So 34,

00:49:08.920 that would 34 is like a super long draw. I don't, you'd have to be like an orangutan or something to

00:49:15.220 have that kind of draw length, but, but, uh, so the draw length, not so much, but the poundage.

00:49:22.860 Yeah. Oh yeah, for sure. Oh yeah. Yeah. I'm drawing a hundred. Yeah, exactly. I don't really see the

00:49:29.920 need to, I just need to draw it back where it's easy and I can control, not easy, but where I can

00:49:35.980 control it without like moving a lot. Cause you don't want to scare the deer away. And then it just

00:49:42.660 needs to get the job done. That's right. And that's, and that determines how far away you can

00:49:48.540 shoot. Uh, not so much. I mean, yes, technically, I guess distance, but velocity mostly. Oh, okay.

00:49:56.280 Speed of the arrow. And it's, is 70 average. Slightly better than average. I'd say. Um, I don't,

00:50:04.100 I don't know. All right. I think most of the guys I hunt with, they shoot right around the same

00:50:11.180 weight. Around the same. Okay. And you know what? There's other guys, there's the backwards bait

00:50:17.000 and tackle. That's the archery shop that I go to. Um, older gentlemen, he's like, yeah,

00:50:21.140 I shoot like a 55, 60 pound draw weight, which is actually not a lot necessarily. He's like,

00:50:27.320 but it gets the job done. I'm like, cool. Rock on. That's all you need. It works. Yeah. All right.

00:50:33.900 Goody two, two, eight. Why should people have children?

00:50:40.860 I don't think you should have children. That's a good question. I wish I would have prepared for

00:50:45.440 that one. Cause that's a really good question. I'll tell you what, for me, here's my take the

00:50:49.740 benefits. Yeah. I mean, look, if you're thinking you should, I don't know if you should. Uh, but

00:50:57.480 if you have a desire, then certainly you should consider it. But for me, the benefits are I take

00:51:03.140 pride in knowing that I'm raising these human beings and that they will be, hopefully if I do

00:51:09.960 the job I'm supposed to, and they have a say in the matter too, but hopefully I'm raising,

00:51:14.380 uh, self-sufficient contributing members of a healthy and, and valuable society.

00:51:20.360 But they also teach me sacrifice and discipline and thinking about something beyond yourself.

00:51:28.740 And, you know, as I watch my children, I have four children. I watch them all interact with me and

00:51:33.860 their mother and their friends and life in different ways. I learn things from them. You know, like my,

00:51:41.020 uh, my daughter is very nurturing and that's not something I am. And so I watch her and I'm like,

00:51:47.140 that's interesting. Uh, my oldest is very sensitive. He's very in tune with the way other

00:51:52.460 people are feeling and experiencing things. And that makes me better. You know, my, my, uh, second

00:51:59.300 son, he's very analytical. And so I see him play with his Legos or I see him coding on his computer

00:52:05.440 and he's just pouring over the details on the formulas and the codes. And that's interesting.

00:52:11.460 And then I see my youngest who is just a hellion and his enthusiasm and his excitement for life and

00:52:18.020 how passionate he is. I'm like, I need to be more like that. So I learned from them.

00:52:22.620 And I also learned patience, you know, it's a challenge. It's not easy. So I think that's why

00:52:27.120 anybody would ask, ask the question. Cause it's hard. If it was easy, you wouldn't have to ask that

00:52:31.900 question and everybody would have kids and they'd be great fathers and, and, and, uh, mothers, but

00:52:37.700 it's not, it's hard, man. It's really, really hard, but it's also very rewarding and fulfilling.

00:52:46.300 And I wish I could just give you a better answer, but some of the things,

00:52:49.380 some of the benefits of having children are intangible and hard for me to quantify,

00:52:54.840 but the entire package is what makes it so valuable for me. Yeah. I don't know that that

00:53:01.880 does adjust. It doesn't, as I, as I listened to it, it doesn't do it justice. I don't think I

00:53:07.560 ever could do it justice. I just don't have a better answer than that. I mean, that's how I feel.

00:53:15.240 Yeah. How about you though? I want to, yeah. Um, I, I, I think if, if you answered the question

00:53:23.900 from the perspective of what would your rating of living a fulfilled and complete life be

00:53:31.240 as a father versus not, and they are black and white differences,

00:53:38.540 like I, I really honestly feel like if I, if I didn't have the experiences and the opportunities

00:53:47.160 of being a father, um, and I just, my life would not even slightly look as fulfilled as it does

00:53:55.240 because of my opportunity to be a dad. Um, so it's, it's profound and, and, and, uh, the values,

00:54:01.660 I mean, I don't know about you, but like, first time you see your kid, you know, you hear this

00:54:05.500 concept, you know, in scripture of unconditional love. Right. And you, and you're like, theoretically,

00:54:11.780 I'm like, Oh yeah, I understand. I understand. And then you have a kid and you're like, Oh,

00:54:15.100 now I get it. Like all of a sudden, like a switch turns on and you go, now I know what it's like

00:54:22.220 to actually love someone unconditionally where this person could do anything to me and I would

00:54:27.900 never stop loving them. And, and, and it's great because now you have this built-in weirdness that

00:54:34.400 you just learn that. And then you can use that as the model of like, Oh, okay. Now how do I do that

00:54:40.340 with my spouse? Because it doesn't come as easy. Right. And, and I think it also helps me with my

00:54:47.780 relationship, not to get all spiritual, but like, I think it helps me with my relationship with my

00:54:52.420 creator totally with completely my God. Right. Because I can't, it's hard to look at that

00:54:58.580 relationship unless I put myself in the role of father and I put him in the role of father. And then

00:55:06.040 all of a sudden I get it. Right. Cause I know what a father, I, I know all fathers. We all know,

00:55:12.160 we know what it's like to be a father. We know how we feel about our kids. We understand what we'd be

00:55:16.680 willing to do for them. And we can, we have that common bond of fatherhood. So it's also interesting.

00:55:24.060 Those are all very good points. It's also interesting to acknowledge and recognize and experience firsthand

00:55:30.120 the capacity for love that we have, you know, so you have your first child and you fully love that

00:55:36.700 child. And then you have your second child and you fully love that child. And you have your fourth

00:55:41.300 child. That's the other thing that blows your mind. Yeah. Cause I'm sure you did the same thing.

00:55:45.200 You're like, Oh, we're going to have another kid. And then you're like, so which one am I going to love

00:55:50.200 more? Right. You, you, you work through that whole thing and then you have another child and you're

00:55:54.620 like, that's weird. I love them different, but equally. Sure. You didn't even know that was

00:56:01.160 possible. I didn't even know that was possible. I thought there was always a pecking order to your

00:56:05.240 love. And then you have two kids and you're like, that's weird. You know, and you would never know

00:56:11.460 that unless you're a parent. I think. The other thing I thought about while you were saying that,

00:56:16.260 and I know this is not going to be what everybody thinks, but my belief is that we've been commanded to,

00:56:21.480 we've been commanded to multiply and replenish the earth. And I can't think of any better way

00:56:26.260 to change the culture and society than to have millions and millions of righteous sons and

00:56:32.460 daughters who were growing up in loving homes with a mother and a father, uh, who know the value of

00:56:38.560 hard work and discipline and integrity, who have been disciplined and given structure and love and

00:56:43.160 support now going out and doing the same thing for their communities and their businesses and their

00:56:48.140 eventual families. So we've been instructed and commanded to, I realized not everybody believes

00:56:52.520 that, but you're asking me and that's my belief. Yeah. Well, and, and I recently super cool. I,

00:56:59.360 I can share resources with you later, but, um, I was just looking over some ancestry stuff,

00:57:04.660 like my genealogy. And so I'm like a fourth cousin with James Madison. Right. And, and I'm a cousin of

00:57:14.140 some, some, some famous pioneer that moved from Ireland in New York and she made her way to Sevier

00:57:22.280 County, Utah on her own, you know, and, and I can't help, but like see the value in being part of the

00:57:31.540 human family. Right. And knowing that someday my life will be looked upon by my descendants and that

00:57:40.480 they'll say, what did he do? Right. And that, and that would not be possible. Like I know this

00:57:45.920 for you, Ryan's like you, you care about your legacy. Of course. Right. Well, if you didn't have

00:57:52.900 kids, there's still a legacy. Don't get me wrong, but it's not the same. It's not the same. And I think

00:57:59.920 the idea of having an, uh, a legacy and descendants kind of puts the pressure on a little bit for us to

00:58:08.520 like, make sure that we live this life well. And we live in a way that we can honor those that will

00:58:14.000 come behind us. Right. And not, not just those that came before. Yeah. I mean, one thing you said is

00:58:21.260 you said your, your posterity, your kids and your grandkids will look at you and ask what you did,

00:58:26.980 what you did, or they won't. And they won't know you because you did nothing and you weren't worth

00:58:32.820 knowing. Like, I mean, that's a possibility. Yeah. But that kind of wakes you up, right?

00:58:38.060 Like I'm kind of fired up right now thinking shit, I need to get my shit together. Right. You know,

00:58:42.420 like, right. You know, totally. One thing you asked me about with a boat building, being in my family

00:58:48.940 earlier, I meant to mention that and I overlooked that. Um, yeah, my great grandfather built his own

00:58:53.800 fishing boat. Uh, my, my, uh, uncle reached out to me because he saw a picture of me building the

00:58:58.920 canoe and he said, man, I wish you could have ever could have seen your uncle Carl's, uh, boat. He

00:59:05.280 built this boat and he would go fishing with it. If I would have known that I would have built a boat

00:59:09.740 long ago. I didn't know that until I put it out there. And then I get to find that out. And, um,

00:59:16.400 he said he might have some pictures and I'm hoping you can get those pictures to me because I think

00:59:19.640 that'd be a good inspiration for me and my son who's helping me build the boat. So yeah, this goes back

00:59:25.540 to what we were talking about last week with genealogy and how important that is. I think we,

00:59:28.920 touched on that last week. Yeah. Yeah. Well, and, and someone reached out to me from that episode

00:59:33.760 last week and said, Oh, Kip. Yeah. He's like, there is a website called the sons of the revolution.

00:59:39.600 And it's an organization where descendants of war veterans from the revolution,

00:59:46.920 like come together as a community. Right. I'm like, that's how awesome is that? That is awesome.

00:59:53.660 Well, and that's what caused me to look into my genealogy. Cause I was like,

00:59:56.380 when did we come to America? Right. Cause I actually wanted to know, like, did I have

01:00:00.840 descendants in America during that time? Yeah. You know, but we came, we came over at school.

01:00:06.060 No, I guess your family, maybe like an extent, like extended or another branch of your family.

01:00:10.980 Yeah. Yep. Exactly. Yeah. So interesting and interesting nonetheless. All right. So, um,

01:00:16.800 I don't know if we want to cover this. I mean, uh, Ray DeLunez, you asked, you know,

01:00:22.280 why did Ryan move to Maine? Uh, I think we've covered that quite a bit over the times. I don't

01:00:26.600 know if you want to dive into it. I just, I moved out here for an adventure. You know,

01:00:30.140 we didn't have everything figured out. We had the capacity to move. And I thought, man,

01:00:33.460 what a great time to do it. Our kids are young and we have the financial means to be able to make

01:00:37.520 it happen. So let's make it happen. And worst case scenario, two years later, we move home

01:00:41.120 cause we don't enjoy it. I don't anticipate that happening cause we've loved it, but just an adventure.

01:00:44.900 But completely doable. Yeah. Well, and, and you dive into that even more in previous episodes.

01:00:50.520 So, uh, yeah, for sure. Cool stuff. All right. Uh, Roselle zero zero one. What companies do you

01:00:55.620 own? Do you invest in the stock market? I do invest in the stock market. Um, but I don't

01:01:00.800 pick individual stocks if that's what you're asking. I, my investment philosophy, and this comes

01:01:06.620 from a financial planning background is a broadly diversified portfolio. So thousands and thousands

01:01:13.200 of companies, the ones you can name and the ones you can't thousands and thousands of companies that

01:01:17.500 I own outside of that, I have ownership in other businesses. Obviously I, I own order of man. Um,

01:01:24.420 I sold a couple of years ago, my financial planning practice. So yeah, I own businesses. I have silent,

01:01:30.660 uh, shares and several others that I really won't get into right now. And then I own, um,

01:01:37.260 thousands of shares and other companies through our investment portfolio, mutual funds, mostly.

01:01:41.940 Yeah. Cool. Yeah. And we're, we're pretty diverse as well. I don't, you know what I mean? I'm not

01:01:48.060 one. I don't trust myself to go. Oh, it's Tesla and like throw money. You know, I just, you know,

01:01:54.320 I'd rather, I think that could be fun. I think if you have some, you know, some, some entertainment

01:01:58.800 money and you think, Oh, this is going to do really well, or, you know, Bitcoin, I have Bitcoin. I

01:02:03.040 don't have all my money in Bitcoin, but I have money in Bitcoin. And if it goes to zero,

01:02:07.020 okay, well that sucks, but it isn't going to break us, you know, but if it, if it grows like

01:02:13.300 it is, then that's nice. But again, I'm not following it or watching it. So yeah. I like

01:02:18.460 your verbiage, you know, entertainment money. It's like, uh, it's the 20 bucks that you take

01:02:22.260 to the, uh, blackjack table in Vegas. It's, it's for fun. If you lose it, no big deal. Yeah. Right.

01:02:27.240 It's not a financial strategy, but you know, it could play a part or it could, it could play a part

01:02:32.780 for better or worse. It could play a part. So make sure it plays a part that you're comfortable

01:02:36.960 with. Yeah. All right. Silver Jura, what are the best methods or a few methods of introducing new

01:02:43.460 habits and routines into your life while overriding old ones and or bad habits? I've wanted, uh, I've

01:02:49.300 watched the podcast for a while now, and I've learned a lot. Thank you for all that you do.

01:02:55.040 Um, you know, I'm actually probably not going to answer this question because I would just give you

01:03:00.840 two books that you should read and I would do a significantly better job than what I could give

01:03:05.920 you. So I think anything that I said would be, would mirror from these two books or do you some

01:03:11.640 sort of injustice? So I would say, no, the one, okay. You know, atomic habits probably right by James

01:03:17.920 clear. Great book talks about that at length, his blog and all that talks about it. Uh, the other one

01:03:23.600 is Charles Duhigg, but, uh, the power of habit. So you can read that too. He talks about red and yellow,

01:03:29.640 right? Yeah, it is. Yeah. Yeah. He talks about the, I can't remember the exact terms, but I think

01:03:35.680 the cue and the trigger and the reward or something like that. It's been a little while.

01:03:41.760 Yeah. And he talks about the habit loop as well. I think habit loop, that's what it is. That's,

01:03:46.700 that is the loop. So you have your trigger and then your cue and then your reward again,

01:03:51.400 I'm butchering that. Like I said, I would do it in justice. Uh, but I would say if you're going

01:03:57.020 to start somewhere, I would say start with atomic habits, just read that book. That's better than I

01:04:01.960 can give you and significantly broader and more robust than what we can share here.

01:04:08.920 Yeah. And that book's a great book and highly insightful. Like, yeah. And we used it in the

01:04:13.300 iron council just a couple of months ago. Yeah. No, it's not basic. It's, it's very,

01:04:17.960 it's got some psychology. I mean, we had James on the podcast. If you want to go back and listen to

01:04:21.660 that podcast, you can, but you've got psychology, human psychology and, uh, you know, logic, but

01:04:28.140 then emotion and how we get wrapped up into that. Like there's so much good information in that book.

01:04:32.340 So go check it out. All right. Let's take one or two more Kip. All right. Uncage the lion best

01:04:38.380 advice for launching a podcast. What audio interface editing systems to use? Do you want me to find that

01:04:43.660 episode? Actually you have the website too. I think you can go to order of man.com slash podcast gear

01:04:49.940 and see what I personally use. Uh, Pat Flynn. If you search Pat Flynn's guide to podcasting has,

01:04:57.060 that's actually the exact strategy that I use from step one through 20, whatever it was for

01:05:04.000 launching this podcast. Look, don't overcomplicate it. That's what I would say. Just don't overcomplicate

01:05:09.880 it. You'll need zoom. If you're doing remote. Uh, I've got the, I don't even know what these are

01:05:14.840 called sure seven M B or something. What are they called? The mic SM SM seven B is what this

01:05:22.880 microphone is with the road boom arm. I think Kip, you've got the same setup. Yep. Um, thanks to

01:05:28.860 you, by the way. I don't know. I, did I publicly thank you? I don't know. I mean, you could always

01:05:33.960 do that again. This is a public thing. Ryan hooked me up before I was using like, like this thing,

01:05:41.840 you know, actually I wasn't using this, but you know, it's, um, it's, it's a little self-serving

01:05:48.120 too though. Right. You know, we clean up the quality, but you know, it's a gift too. So we

01:05:51.860 look after each other. That's important. I appreciate it. Yeah. Um, I use a scarlet. I think

01:05:57.900 it's two, I two or T two I or something. Look, you can see how much I had to focus. Yeah. Um,

01:06:05.840 they have one with two microphones. They have one with where you can put plug in for, um, when I'm

01:06:12.620 traveling, which I will be over the next week or two, I use a, uh, a zoom recorder. And then I use

01:06:19.800 these headsets right here. I've got four of these and this is the, um, HD two 80 pro. I don't know

01:06:30.100 what brand it is. Like you can tell how much I focus on this stuff, but HD two 80 pro. I use these,

01:06:35.540 uh, black, uh, headphones here. Uh, I got these, the, uh, and I think Kip you're using these as well.

01:06:42.960 The Raycons, I think they're, I don't know, two, two 55 or something. Who knows these? That's what

01:06:48.220 these are in my ears right now. Just don't overcomplicate it. Just, this is a great mic,

01:06:53.680 a little bit more expensive. Um, there's the ATR 2100. That's a good mic. It's like 60 bucks.

01:07:01.600 That's actually all you, if you wanted to do this on low budget, you would buy the ATR 2100,

01:07:06.980 60, 70 bucks. You would use, I personally use the program audacity to edit. I don't edit it anymore.

01:07:13.260 We have an editor, Cody Lanham does a wonderful job. Um, but that's what he's using.

01:07:18.220 Other people use garage band. I'm sure there's some Adobe things there. Like just don't overcomplicate

01:07:23.780 it. Go do this. Go to Pat Flynn's guide to podcasting. Go through that. That's going to

01:07:29.260 walk you through everything. Cool. All right. Last question. This is a good one. By the way,

01:07:33.280 I'm not trying to deflect on these. I just want to make sure like, cause we talked about the habit

01:07:37.460 thing and the pot. I'm not trying to deflect. I'm just telling you there's people who know it better

01:07:41.200 than I do. And I would want people to tell me that if I'm asking a question. So Pat Flynn's got his guide.

01:07:46.800 It's free. Uh, James clear has his book. It's going to cost you 20 bucks or go get it to the

01:07:52.080 library or $5 on audible, whatever it is. Those are great resources. Those are the best resources.

01:07:57.160 And anything I could tell you would be inferior to what that stuff has. Copy. Okay. Shane rabbits.

01:08:05.220 How are you doing Ryan? I'm good. And, um, how do you effectively communicate with others for a

01:08:12.820 mutual understanding? Ask good questions. Questions are just so powerful. I mean, you remember when we

01:08:21.340 had, uh, when we were talking about your shirt, you know, trying to, trying to network with somebody

01:08:26.340 you've never met before, ask them a question about themselves. Like, why would you wear a shirt?

01:08:30.860 Like Kip, that shirt means something to you, right? You there's meaning to it. You've wrapped

01:08:36.940 up meaning to it. It's, it's, it's, it's a little bit of who you are. You're wearing it because you're

01:08:41.460 trying to express something. So it's completely on the table for us to talk about. And I think you

01:08:49.920 would want to talk about it. Right? So I'm curious. So that, that, that is the greatest attribute.

01:08:56.340 I think that you can have for trying to understand people is to be genuinely curious. If you jump to

01:09:01.940 a bunch of conclusions and you think, you know what that individual is about, and you think they're

01:09:06.380 going to know, you know what they're going to say. Like I had a guy, he had some, um, some critiques,

01:09:10.820 some criticism. He wasn't overly critical, but it was criticism. And, and he, he basically came back

01:09:18.380 and he, he shared this and I thought, okay, well, this is interesting. You know, I should take this to

01:09:22.240 heart. And then he wrote something like, and I don't care if you respond back to me,

01:09:26.000 because whatever you say, it doesn't matter to me. And I'm like, really? Yeah. I'm like,

01:09:31.500 why, why would you say that? Like, how is that going to open up a dialogue? Like how,

01:09:39.240 how do you think somebody is going to receive that? You know, instead, I think a better way

01:09:44.560 maybe to do it would be to say, Hey, uh, Kip, I noticed that you were doing X, Y, and Z. And

01:09:52.040 on the surface, I don't really understand it. It comes across as arrogant or something, whatever.

01:09:57.640 Right. But what's your reason for doing that? Like, isn't that the pathway to understanding

01:10:05.120 curiosity, no preconceived idea, no accusation, just stating a simple fact. It noticed you did this.

01:10:13.520 I interpreted it as meaning this. So I'm very curious as to why you did that or said that,

01:10:19.060 or did it this way. And then you allow that person, I would almost say you afford the,

01:10:25.420 that person, the grace of like giving them a space to answer and explain themselves.

01:10:30.860 And then you might come back and say, Oh, okay. I still don't agree, but yeah. Okay.

01:10:36.940 Yeah. I can appreciate that. You have an opinion about it, but curiosity. And I've only gotten

01:10:41.300 pretty good at this. I think through podcasting, I have to be curious. Otherwise I'll never present

01:10:47.880 a great conversation for you guys to listen to. So when somebody says something, I don't agree with,

01:10:53.840 I'm not like, Oh, you're wrong. Oh, you should. No, it's like, what makes you say that? I mean,

01:10:59.520 what, what about the way that you believe or think, or your experiences leads you that to that

01:11:04.760 conclusion. And I'm not doing it accusatory. Like I'm not poking at them, right? Like what,

01:11:11.560 how could you believe that? That's, that's an accusation disguised as a question. Like I'll

01:11:19.060 have people say, well, I'm just asking a question. Yes. Technically it had a question mark, but it was

01:11:24.780 an accusation disguised as a question. We all know the motive. So your motive has to be pure

01:11:30.540 curiosity. That means you care because if you didn't care, you wouldn't be curious.

01:11:36.400 Yeah. Being curious with other people illustrates some level of care. I care about what you have to

01:11:45.420 say, which is why I'm curious what you're going to say. Yeah. Yeah. Cubbies, uh, you know,

01:11:51.980 seek first to understand, you know, kind of mentality. And, and, and by the way, the other

01:11:56.320 person knows, right? Like, well, let's talk like the t-shirt example, right? We're at a networking

01:12:02.180 event. Ryan comes up to me and goes, Oh, protect, provide, preside. That's interesting. What is that

01:12:06.940 about? And then if it's not genuine, I'll go, Oh, well, it's this podcast, whatever, you know,

01:12:13.300 I'll talk about this is podcasts that I helped contribute with or whatever. And I stopped there

01:12:17.180 and the guy goes, Oh, cool. Not genuine or, or, and I, and I know, because if you were genuinely

01:12:24.520 curious, you'd be like, Oh, what kind of podcast? Like, you know, when someone just asks a question

01:12:30.560 to start versus if they're like, Oh, and, and I've, I've seen this so many times where it's a strategy,

01:12:36.360 right? And then you're like, yeah, you really didn't want to know. Like you could tell that there's

01:12:42.640 not enough interest and they're, they just wanted to start a conversation. Yeah. You know,

01:12:48.160 what's funny is when I was doing financial planning, if, if I was interested in trying to

01:12:53.060 like get a client or something and they asked me what I'd be doing, I had this elevator speech, you

01:12:57.740 know, this pitch of what I do. And if for whatever reason, I wasn't interested in like picking up a

01:13:03.500 client or something and people would ask, I'd be like, I'd always say, I sell life insurance

01:13:07.380 and it would shut them up real quick. You used it to like deter people from asking

01:13:14.480 you questions, which is great. Which is great. Yeah. Yeah. I think just being curious, you know,

01:13:21.640 what stay the question one more time, just so I make sure we answered it.

01:13:26.540 Sorry. Sorry. Did you close it? Where's it at? Oh, how do you effectively communicate with

01:13:30.220 others for mutual understanding? Well, mutual understanding is kind of interesting, right? Because

01:13:34.860 that has, it's a little loaded. Like I want you to understand me, you know, but

01:13:39.300 Yeah. The way that question is worded, which is why I wanted to ask you again is how do you

01:13:44.760 communicate effectively when you're the way that the question is worded? I don't know if this is true

01:13:48.820 or not, but the way it's worded is making me, making it sound like you want other people to

01:13:53.640 understand you. Yeah. How do I communicate so that you'll understand me? And what we're suggesting

01:14:00.320 is you stop thinking like that. I mean, I think that's important. Sure. Yeah. But maybe

01:14:06.320 let's pull a page out of Jocko's verbiage flank a little bit, but again, the motive has to be pure

01:14:13.020 and you flank somebody by saying, look, so I go to the small example. I got my patriarch shirt on

01:14:19.980 today. Okay. So we go to this networking group, you and I don't know each other. And I go up to you

01:14:23.300 and I say, Hey, what? So protect, provide, preside. What is that? Can you tell me about that? And you

01:14:26.900 tell me and I ask questions about it. What would you naturally do? I'd be like, well, it's a right

01:14:32.720 in line with your shirt. And then you would say, what's up with your shirt? Yeah. If you didn't

01:14:37.680 know that they were or both order man shirts, right? You'd be like, yeah. So like, this is what

01:14:41.460 this means. And what's that about? Same thing with a job. If I went to you and I said, Hey, so, um,

01:14:47.980 you know, we're here at this networking thing. What do you do for work? And you tell me, and we go on a

01:14:51.840 little bit, what would you naturally do? How about you? What do you, what do you do for work?

01:14:57.120 Hey, where are you from? I'm from here. Where are you from? That's how conversation works. Social

01:15:03.960 media has changed the dynamic a little bit, but that's how conversation works. You know,

01:15:07.880 every once in a while I'll post something and they'll, they'll quit back and they'll say, you

01:15:11.040 know, even, even if it's respectful, they'll say something and I'll, and I'll disagree with them.

01:15:14.680 And they're like, well, I'm just trying to share my opinion. I'm like, no, I know,

01:15:17.540 but this is how dialogue works. I share something and then you share something. And then I share

01:15:23.280 something back. Like, I'm not obligated to agree with you. Just like, I don't, I don't think you

01:15:30.060 should shut up. I'm, I'm just saying, I don't agree with you. This is dialogue. Social media has

01:15:35.200 made it all, but impossible. So let's learn to open the lines of communication a little bit.

01:15:40.880 Stop worrying so much about getting people to understand you, try to understand them.

01:15:44.880 They'll give you plenty of opportunities to present your ideas. If you do this in a genuine

01:15:49.460 way. Yeah. Yeah. And I, and then I think there's a whole other side conversation about

01:15:54.160 effective communicating, right? That sure. That we can probably even talk about, you know,

01:16:00.100 but yeah. All right. Let's wrap up. All right, let's do it. All right. So we've talked about a

01:16:06.760 handful of things, um, like these Instagram guys, you can follow Mr. Mickler at Ryan Mickler on

01:16:12.260 Instagram and Twitter. If it's still running, who knows? Twitter may be running. You won't find

01:16:18.900 my parlor anymore, but Twitter, Twitter will be going. Yeah. Well, that's true. Actually.

01:16:23.000 I have a lot. I, you know, I've really refrained from telling people how many followers I've lost

01:16:27.460 because you know, those, I don't know, whatever, but yeah, it is, it is noticeable. I'll say that

01:16:32.700 it is noticeable. It's very interesting. I thought people were just complaining and

01:16:36.200 no, it's, it's, it's noticeable. Yeah. And it's not just like, I mean, I don't know. It's,

01:16:44.160 it's crazy. There's, there's a, if you pulled the numbers and you had to classify like social

01:16:51.100 media accounts and how they've varied in followings and promoting, there's some major adjustments

01:17:00.020 occurring. Yeah. It's nuts. But regardless, Mr. Mickler still on social media, you can follow him

01:17:06.700 at Ryan Mickler, um, and spread this message. I mean, I can't, I assume it seems like we see it

01:17:12.420 every week. Right. But like in the climate of things, it's just crazy. And, and I can't,

01:17:18.000 if you don't mind me just expressing this fairly quickly, when, when I think about new sitting in the

01:17:24.700 middle and the citizens on the side, and there's this polarization of people getting mad at each

01:17:30.540 other with, with people poking and prodding both sides. And, and at the center of that a little bit

01:17:37.600 is the lack of critical thinking and sovereignty, like be an independent thinker. Right. And that's

01:17:46.300 what's, that's, what's promoted on this podcast. That's, that's what the order of man movement is

01:17:51.500 about is, is being with like-minded men seeking sovereignty in all areas, right? Financially, as

01:17:58.100 well as your mental maturity and owning your lives. And, and so it's just so needed and I can't help

01:18:06.380 but over this weekend and last couple of days is just realizing how important this movement is and

01:18:12.160 it becomes more important. It gets its steam based upon obviously you guys implementing these

01:18:18.500 things in your lives, but also sharing this message. And you can do so via sharing links from

01:18:23.940 the podcast, from the YouTube channel, following Ryan on, on social media and sharing those meaningful

01:18:30.560 posts. That's how we create momentum. That's how we help people level up. That's how we, how we hold

01:18:38.120 each other accountable and become better as a group, as a whole. So there you go. There's a spill.

01:18:44.700 So, uh, and of course swag in the store. So, uh, grab some, grab some t-shirts.

01:18:49.760 We're finally getting stocked up on stuff. Yeah. So some guy will follow up and ask about,

01:18:54.320 Hey, what does that mean? Yeah. A lot of, by the way, has happened to me all the time.

01:18:57.640 A lot of people do that. Yeah. A lot of people do that. Or they'll send me a message and let's say,

01:19:01.000 Hey, I was in, uh, you know, North Dakota and I was driving down the road and I saw a truck with a

01:19:05.680 order of man sticker and I passed him and we both nodded and we knew that we were in this

01:19:10.640 battle to reclaim and restore masculinity together. That part didn't happen. But the other part where

01:19:15.900 they saw and they were thought it was cool is that did happen. Yeah. That happens. I think it's

01:19:20.600 cool. Yeah. And when I don't want to talk to him cause I'm busy working out like, Oh, it's just like

01:19:25.140 a white privilege podcast. And then I just, the, uh, tyrannical patriarchy. No, it wouldn't be,

01:19:32.620 you wouldn't like it. Yeah. It's, it's about men domineering over all social groups. You know,

01:19:40.080 it's not that cool. It's not cool. All right, guys. Appreciate you. Great questions today.

01:19:44.780 Keep them coming. Um, Kip, you're flying solo next week. So, you know, we'll, now that I'm

01:19:49.040 warning people, we'll see, we'll see how many people listen. Cause look, we haven't given it

01:19:53.340 a fair assessment, you know, it was like, I'll, I'll give you the numbers when it's on your own.

01:19:57.920 And you know, those aren't accurate numbers. Cause we don't tell people that they just assume I'm

01:20:01.940 going to be here. Yeah. They download it. And then they're like, ah, yeah. So they've already

01:20:06.460 downloaded it. So now we're going to give you a warning. Cause we want to see,

01:20:09.340 are you going to have better numbers or worse numbers when Kip is flying solo? We'll see.

01:20:13.340 We'll put this theory. Let's see how this goes. Bring it. Yeah. I'm going to call all my family

01:20:17.200 members. Good. You'll have five more downloads. That's zero. Right. All right, guys. Appreciate

01:20:26.160 you. We'll be back on Friday for our Friday field notes until then go out there, take action,

01:20:30.420 become the man you are meant to be. Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast.

01:20:34.480 You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be.

01:20:38.500 We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.

Order of Man - January 13, 2021

The Benefits of Fatherhood, Fostering Mutual Understanding, and The Power and Pitfalls of Singular Focus ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

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