Order of Man - The Difference Between Quitting and Pivoting, Application Over Knowledge, & Maintaining Priorities

00:00:00.000 how do you stay disciplined the answer is in the question you be disciplined if it didn't require

00:00:05.760 discipline you wouldn't need to be disciplined right so if you're like oh man this is easy then

00:00:11.120 no discipline is required i don't even need to be disciplined to go hang out with my my girlfriend

00:00:16.560 or my kids like that isn't a hard i actually like doing that it's not challenging for me

00:00:21.200 so no discipline is required the very fact that a person might ask how do you stay disciplined means

00:00:26.960 that they need to actually be disciplined and work through it you're a man of action you live life to

00:00:33.360 the fullest embrace your fears and boldly charge your own path when life knocks you down you get

00:00:38.800 back up one more time every time you are not easily deterred or defeated rugged resilient strong this

00:00:46.800 is your life this is who you are this is who you will become at the end of the day and after all

00:00:52.640 is said and done you can call yourself a man kiff what's up man great to see you on this fine monday

00:00:59.520 we've got a week a little less than now till our hunt together in minnesota i'm very excited about

00:01:04.160 that yeah me too no it's going to be good uh you know this this will be new another hunt that's new

00:01:11.280 different never shot from an elevated position before so that should be interesting yeah it is

00:01:19.040 different i know this is your second bow hunt right yep and it is different it's uh well the

00:01:25.360 first hunt was a western style spot and stock we did some stuff from blinds and uh that was in hawaii

00:01:31.440 and then this one's whitetails so yeah you're you're sitting up in a tree stand or a tripod for hours on

00:01:36.480 end it's challenging in its own right i like it the first year i really really struggled just sitting

00:01:43.280 there like an idiot doing nothing and now it's one of the things i look forward most to just sitting

00:01:49.600 in that stand freezing you know just getting comfortable and just sitting there for three

00:01:53.840 four hours at a time it's actually really relaxing and you think about a lot of stuff too yeah just a

00:01:59.440 lot of pondering well i was i was thinking how often in life the things that we can't stand are the

00:02:06.080 very things that we end up enjoying you know i had a good conversation with the guys on the mats

00:02:12.080 last week it was kind of one of those group therapy sessions you know you get done training

00:02:16.320 everyone sits around and talks for another 30 minutes and one of the guys there dan and we we

00:02:23.520 kind of went through our jujitsu journey very similar the entire time but i was telling him i'm like dude i

00:02:29.040 i hated i hated training with you like when i saw you show up at class i was like ah not that guy i

00:02:36.880 hate that guy just because he's a beast or what yeah i just i struggled with him like he was a

00:02:42.480 very difficult role and um but my my mentality back then was that's the first guy to ask to train

00:02:50.480 with you know it's like let's get it over with let's go yeah and and the funny part was do it while

00:02:55.440 you're fresh yeah and there's probably some strategy there as well but by the time we were purple brown

00:03:03.520 belts he's one of my favorite training partners yeah you know it's like this this thing i thought

00:03:09.840 i hated was the very thing that that brought me more fulfillment and satisfaction i think that's a

00:03:17.280 just a healthy positive mindset that you have about it because it's very easy to take something that you

00:03:21.920 hate and make not only it miserable but everybody else around you miserable in the process and the

00:03:28.480 only differentiating factor and you've said this before what is the story that you give it and what

00:03:33.120 is the meaning behind it so for you the meaning of rolling with dan was it's tough it's difficult i

00:03:39.120 have a hard time but i get better i improve this is good for me and so you've attached a positive

00:03:44.880 outcome to it where very easily the majority of people i would say would probably attach a negative

00:03:50.400 outcome this isn't fun i'm getting beat up i'm not getting any better this is lame and therefore they

00:03:57.360 don't have a good experience with it yeah totally i you might give me too much credit though i i

00:04:02.160 think i probably trained with him hundreds of times hating it and despising it before i started

00:04:07.280 liking it so i don't i wouldn't say i had a positive attitude i just maybe i grinded until i did have a

00:04:12.480 positive attitude maybe but you still and that that might be true for sure but you still attach

00:04:18.320 something positive to it otherwise you would have given up on doing that a long time

00:04:21.920 time previous to that so how was how could that hunt be miserable like after the second time for

00:04:29.280 you all of a sudden you enjoyed it or you're like this is miserable but once it was over you're like

00:04:34.640 man that was really good for me and now now you appreciate that hunt well there was two things

00:04:40.480 really about that hunt so there was there was the physical misery and the mental misery and the physical

00:04:46.240 misery was i was not prepared for the weather i was so cold my feet were cold i didn't have insulated boots

00:04:53.920 and when you're standing up in a tree stand you know 20 feet 30 feet off the ground the wind's just

00:05:00.400 kicking around and your feet just freeze while they're just sitting there on the the metal rack and

00:05:07.520 i didn't have the proper gear so that part was miserable and that's an easy fix i actually called

00:05:12.800 uh one of the big product uh our big game product developers for sitka who i know and i said hey

00:05:20.960 what do i need for this hunt and he's like oh let me get you taken care of and he put together this

00:05:25.680 incredible sitka system that i use now i use a lot of origin gear as well that they're built for cold

00:05:31.520 weather since they're in maine uh so that was part of it and then the other part of it was i'm an

00:05:37.600 impatient person just naturally so sitting there thinking about all the things that i have to get

00:05:43.120 done all the things that i could be doing right now while i'm sitting in a tree stand my wheels were

00:05:48.080 just turning but i realized i really liked the hunt and so for me it was a matter of just reframing that

00:05:54.400 time to this is time for me to read like i'll bring a book up there or i'll list i'll bring my earbuds

00:06:00.800 sometimes and listen to something um or most of the time i actually just sit and look around at

00:06:09.760 stuff grass trees rocks i actually just like it now because it's just a time for me to decompress

00:06:17.840 and the thing that i really did that helped me was making sure that all my ducks were in a row before

00:06:23.520 i left for the hunt so i didn't have to worry about recording any podcasts i didn't worry have to

00:06:28.880 worry about who was going to do what duty with order of man and iron council and recording podcasts

00:06:35.040 so i could just be fully present with with the hunt so those are a couple of things that helped me

00:06:39.600 yeah that makes sense well and and it now it also makes sense why you called me last week and you're

00:06:44.000 like hey make sure that you have these things to to be warm so i appreciate the uh well i don't want

00:06:51.120 you to be miserable either because because then you'll make then you'll make all of us miserable

00:06:55.120 it has less to do with you and more to do with i want to enjoy my hunt so i don't want to hear you

00:06:59.120 bitch and moan about it absolutely that's awesome well do you have a headline today kim yeah i i have

00:07:07.440 one um do you want me to kick us off yeah because i don't have i have a thought it's just a you know

00:07:12.880 i want to get on my soapbox for about 30 seconds so you go ahead with your headline and i'll go after

00:07:17.600 that you know i'm i'll be honest i thought you were going to talk about trump being on rogan um

00:07:23.840 pretty crazy uh yeah i think within like a 24 hour period it's like close to 22 million views uh

00:07:32.240 last time i checked it was like 35 or yeah i heard a couple of days ago within 24 hours it was his most

00:07:38.160 down or his fourth most downloaded podcast to date within 24 hours so i'm sure it surpassed that at this

00:07:43.920 point yeah and and full disclosure i didn't listen to the whole thing yet i am an impatient person

00:07:52.240 sometimes when it comes to communication and and trump just triggers me like i'm like

00:07:59.280 like get to the point yeah like he like and it's funny because he actually talks about how he weaves

00:08:06.240 conversations and i'm like no no weaving don't weave just get going you know but he talks fast when he does

00:08:14.080 talk so i normally listen to podcasts at 2.0 i can't understand him at 2.0 because when he does speak

00:08:21.360 it's a little too fast so i'm like oh my gosh i'm gonna have to listen to this guy at one one maybe

00:08:26.800 one and a half one quarter speed which is gonna you know obviously take three hours but um that's

00:08:32.880 actually not my headline my my headline was i've had the opportunity over the last couple sundays to help

00:08:39.920 teach uh emotional resilience class to youth and it's uh our church is doing this program they're

00:08:47.760 kind of piling it in our neighborhood and and i'm having the opportunity to speak into these kids

00:08:53.840 and it's been really great it's it's it's been enjoyable it's right up my alley of things that i

00:09:01.040 care about and so it's been really edifying however as i've been having these conversations with these

00:09:08.480 kids i can't help but look at the landscape and we do this even i do this a little bit where we'll

00:09:14.960 talk about woke mentality or coddling right there's a great book coddling of the american mind and the

00:09:22.720 focus is all what government schools social programs etc and as i be speaking with these kids and these

00:09:33.520 are great kids and their parents are great parents and and i actually don't even mean to say this as

00:09:39.600 an attack on anyone because it's a natural tendency but a lot of these kids struggle with emotional

00:09:46.800 resilience because of how they're parented not because of the school system now don't get me

00:09:54.480 wrong school systems not helping but but the the greatest impact on the minds of youth is our

00:10:01.600 parenting you know and and i can't help but like realize this is such an issue because so many parents

00:10:09.520 are rescuing their children from difficulty right little timmy argues it or gets in a little

00:10:15.600 upset fight with his siblings or his friends in the backyard and what do we do we run out there and

00:10:21.200 we resolve it for him oh you feel sad oh we resolve that for you and then we say silly things like well

00:10:27.920 no you're you're highly talented no you're not like literally in this in this youth class last night

00:10:34.480 or yesterday i was i was saying this to him i was like hey it doesn't value it doesn't benefit you

00:10:41.520 to operate in the area that's not in reality if you're playing lacrosse you might be the worst kid

00:10:50.720 on the team and and you need to know if you're the worst kid on the team so you can do something about

00:10:59.040 it and so be careful and i was telling the used to be careful when people tell you oh no no you're awesome

00:11:06.080 no you may not be awesome but you can be and what are you going to do about it and i just couldn't

00:11:14.160 help and it's just kind of created a soapbox from the last week of just how much we are robbing our

00:11:20.160 children from growth and opportunity because we don't want them to be uncomfortable but yet we all

00:11:26.800 know this that growth is on the back side of being uncomfortable and we need to let them grow and learn and

00:11:34.560 stop rescuing them all the time yeah i love it man you know it's that it actually ties in nicely

00:11:40.560 to what you were talking about with being on the mats with dan uh it's part of the reason what you're

00:11:46.160 saying with emotional resilience that we should spend time with people in activities that are better than

00:11:51.520 we are because then it gives us a perspective of our own performance and we always hear comparison

00:11:58.240 trap and comparison is the thief of joy and if you're falling into comparison and it's hindering

00:12:05.120 you from progress because it's demoralizing and deflating sure i can agree with that but if i'm on

00:12:10.160 the mats and i'm rolling with you kip i don't get demoralized when you beat me and you will beat me

00:12:16.720 it actually inspires me oh he did this i wasn't prepared for it next time i roll with him i'm going to be

00:12:22.240 better or you know if you're at a pistol class we've got a pistol course coming up and i'm thinking

00:12:28.240 about that if somebody's better than you that's good it actually unlocks potential that's hidden

00:12:32.800 in yourself that you didn't know was available yeah and that comparison trap sometimes is because we

00:12:38.480 didn't it's it's very similar to the other things that we talk about you're not completing the thought

00:12:43.840 right a good friend of ours just finished their home this brand new home this ryan

00:12:48.720 the the nicest piece of property and home i have ever seen in my entire life just really

00:12:57.920 just beautiful the whole time i'm just like this is insane right like especially being raised in

00:13:04.320 elsinore utah on a farm right like it just it blows my mind just unreal just just insane and one could

00:13:14.800 say i could walk away from that going oh man my home sucks in comparison right welcome this what is

00:13:20.160 this yeah but it's the same fact finish the thought well how did he get there oh he did all these things

00:13:29.120 over the last 40 years to be able to create that i haven't don't compare they're not the same

00:13:38.000 right a comparison is really in in the spirit of being naive oh well they have and i have okay great

00:13:45.760 why do they have it oh because they paid the price you haven't yet that's the difference so you want

00:13:52.960 that awesome put in more work yeah and now you have a model well and i'll give you another the

00:14:00.080 opposite of that and i'm not saying this about your friend by any means i don't know who it is but

00:14:03.680 what i've seen a lot of the times is people say well how come he has this beautiful house or this

00:14:08.800 big beautiful new truck and what they don't see is that he acquired a bunch of debt to have it he

00:14:14.240 can't sleep at night because he's worried about making the car payment him and his wife are

00:14:18.240 constantly arguing bickering and nagging at each other because they're worried and stressed out about

00:14:22.720 their finances i've done that too is yeah you know the whole full story you don't know the whole story

00:14:28.000 yeah so i have this 2015 gmc three-quarter ton it's a nice truck it's not the nicest it's almost

00:14:36.400 a decade old at this point it's got 230 000 miles or something like that on it and there's another

00:14:43.520 truck that i see every day when i drive by at the dealership that's the upgraded 2022 truck and i'm like

00:14:50.560 oh i want that truck and i see everybody else driving around new fords and new chevys and new gmcs

00:14:56.960 what i am pretty good at doing is understanding my own priorities yeah so could i go and i'll catch

00:15:07.440 myself like how does that guy afford that truck like i know what i i know how much money i make

00:15:12.080 i know how well i'm doing i could do that and the answer is yes i actually could go do it but it's not

00:15:19.280 my priority yeah i would rather not put 80 grand into a brand new truck or not have a 800 car payment

00:15:28.400 or more for the next seven years so that i can go hunt and i can pour money into the business and

00:15:34.240 i can take on investments that i'm interested in and i can go on vacations with people i care and love

00:15:38.880 about so it's just your priorities and don't allow other people's priorities for example your friend and

00:15:45.760 again i'm not saying he's in a negative situation but we can't let our friend's priorities him with

00:15:51.600 his property his beautiful house to become ours if it's not something we're interested in just to

00:15:56.960 try to keep up with all of our buddies totally totally i love the analogy around if if we grabbed

00:16:05.440 everybody listening to podcasts right now and had them all in the room and we said who wants to be a

00:16:09.840 millionaire most hands would all go up of course that's what most society does hey yeah i want that

00:16:17.520 but they don't complete the thought and then we start listing out on the board all the things required

00:16:22.880 to become a millionaire right and as we list those out on the board hands start going down because the

00:16:30.480 reality most people are unwilling to pay the price for certain things and so there's value in in you

00:16:39.680 having that priority going that's not important enough for me and and getting clear on that

00:16:45.440 versus going around thinking you feel robbed and you should you should and you know and and being

00:16:50.480 upset with yourself or distracted from things without without clarifying with yourself of well do i want

00:16:56.960 to and then you might go actually i don't okay awesome then stop beating yourself up that you're not

00:17:02.160 a millionaire you're choosing not to be for a reason right yeah so true i love it man

00:17:09.360 well you know my uh my only thought i was going to do a headline and i've got some headlines but i

00:17:14.400 just i was going to say this i'm just really looking forward to tuesday so as of the release of this

00:17:19.600 podcast it'll be a little less than a week away november 5th so we can just get this stupid election over

00:17:26.960 with i'm tired of everything but being politicized yeah i'm tired of just arguing and nitpicking and

00:17:33.120 bickering over nonsense back and forth online i just actually want to have some real conversations

00:17:39.600 i don't want anything that i say to be misconstrued as some political statement i'm just ready for it

00:17:45.360 to be done and so what i would say at this point you've if you're going to vote you've already made

00:17:49.920 up your mind on who you're going to vote for so just turn the news off you already know you know

00:17:55.520 you're going to vote for paris you know you're going to vote for trump now just turn all that stuff off

00:18:00.560 and get back into the business of raising your kids loving your wife starting your business doing

00:18:05.680 your job serving your clients working in your community and just get back to the role of trying

00:18:11.200 to be a good man and a good american that's my soapbox for today just let's be done with it

00:18:17.600 make your vote vote your conscience and uh we'll let the chips fall where they may i love it let's

00:18:22.800 just in the podcast right there man done done and done done you know it's perfect timing that

00:18:28.720 we'll be hunting that week by the way i thought about well so yesterday i thought man i'm kind

00:18:33.440 of looking forward to just being disconnected a little bit while that's all happening unless of

00:18:38.480 course our cities are burning yeah well that's true i have some news on this i actually last week

00:18:46.000 got an invite the daily wire team is doing a very small thing uh with their crew for live coverage on

00:18:54.160 election night and so are you gonna go ben shapiro will be there matt walsh will be there andrew clavin

00:19:00.320 michael knowles jordan peterson dennis prager and a very small group of people and i got an invite

00:19:06.560 i'm like you gotta go so here's what i'm gonna do so i'm gonna fly in i'm gonna hunt for two days

00:19:13.760 on tuesday morning i'm gonna take a very early flight to nashville fly out do the thing that evening

00:19:20.560 take the red eye back and be back the next day for the next sit the next morning sit so i i will be

00:19:28.000 gone for less than 24 hours so i can get back to the hunt but i i do have to take a break because

00:19:33.920 there's a good opportunity there and again this aligns with what we're talking about with priorities

00:19:38.480 just because we want to check out for a week and do our own thing doesn't mean our priorities stop so

00:19:42.960 there might be things that come up and you just make your pivots and adjustments as necessary

00:19:47.600 well and if you guys hear news of ryan injured it's because he fell asleep in a tree stand and

00:19:52.320 fell to his you know broke his neck or something that's quite possible and you know maybe at this

00:19:57.920 point it's like just take me out and if i'm gonna go that's a great story that other people can laugh

00:20:03.200 at on my behalf and let's just be done with this the kids got the life insurance they're taking care

00:20:08.240 of yeah we're good yeah that's funny i love it man all right man let's get to some questions today

00:20:14.080 yeah so we're going to fill some questions from our brother hood the iron council to learn more

00:20:19.040 about the ic go to order of man.com iron council colin hornback define the difference between quitting

00:20:26.720 and pivoting if one pivots from one thing to another aren't they essentially quitting

00:20:32.880 yeah you could get into the semantical argument here um but i think there's a difference and and i

00:20:39.040 even if you don't think there is i think it's a good idea to make a distinction because one is

00:20:45.200 going to serve you and one is not and here's what i would say is the biggest differentiating factor

00:20:50.880 between quitting and pivoting if you are still interested and motivated by that venture and you

00:20:59.440 stop that's quitting if you are and if you have to be honest with yourself because there's a trap that

00:21:05.600 you won't be honest but if you are no longer interested in it it doesn't bring you joy happiness

00:21:11.840 fulfillment or work towards your objectives then that would be more in line with pivoting the way

00:21:17.840 that i see it so let me give you an example you're at work you really like the work you feel like there's

00:21:24.640 good job growth and opportunity you love working with your clients but it's hard and you got to work

00:21:32.160 late nights and maybe you don't get along very well with the boss but man you love that work

00:21:38.320 if you just throw up your hands and you just stop doing it i would say that's quitting

00:21:44.320 if on the other hand you said hey i love this job i love this work this organization's not great but i

00:21:51.760 have another opportunity over here to do something very similar same space similar space uh the work

00:21:57.760 environment looks like it's going to be a better place a lot more upward mobility and so i'm going

00:22:03.520 to leave this employment and go over here that's a pivot now technically you are quitting the job right

00:22:10.480 but again that's semantics but what i would consider that more of a pivot than you quitting

00:22:15.520 and throwing in the towel quitting is i want to do this but i can't i don't know what i don't have

00:22:19.680 what it takes so i'm done pivoting is this was a good opportunity for me and now i see other

00:22:25.600 opportunities or i have other interests and so i'm going to pivot using my knowledge and expertise

00:22:30.560 from my previous engagements and experiences to catapult me into something bigger and better

00:22:37.360 yeah one one way i like this is quitting is giving up on the desired outcome pivoting is changing the

00:22:44.400 action to get to the desired outcome another way i like that so if if my fitness is important being

00:22:51.840 healthy is important and i'm going to the gym and i'm not loving it quitting is giving up on the

00:22:56.480 outcome of being fit and healthy pivoting is you know i'm not going to throw weights around instead

00:23:02.160 i'm going to sign up for crossfit you're still the goal is still the same goal how you get there

00:23:09.200 and and some of us you know and i think we might be in two different camps right some people might be

00:23:13.920 like they quit too easily sometimes my problem is i don't pivot i'll double down because my ego is

00:23:21.520 assigned to the plan well i got to stick to the plan right and and it looks like this and and and

00:23:28.160 maybe i need to pivot to get the outcome i need because the direction i'm currently going isn't giving

00:23:34.240 me the results i need so i need to pivot but it was my plan and so now i'm invested in plan and and

00:23:40.880 it's more about my ego than the outcome so yeah good well i was just going to say you know you

00:23:47.680 think about some of the best fighters in the world you take ufc for example every fighter goes into the

00:23:53.040 fight with a plan every single one they have a fight camp they have a strategy they have a plan

00:23:57.600 they're watching film like they know the other competitor they are they are ready to go with a plan

00:24:04.000 but the best fighters are the ones who are easily willing to change the plan and adapt based on things

00:24:10.080 they see maybe the other fighter came in with a plan they weren't prepared for the first one to

00:24:14.880 adapt the most effectively is going to win that fight totally so you have to pivot the other thing

00:24:20.880 that's really crucial is just being honest with yourself so what you said i really like what you

00:24:25.920 said you said this the ego is assigned to the plan you have to actually be able to look at yourself

00:24:31.120 and ask yourself are you being egotistical is it ego that is driving your decisions and the other

00:24:36.240 one you have to be aware of is are you quitting because you're no longer interested are you

00:24:40.800 quitting because you're tired or it's hard i can't answer that for you only you can answer that for

00:24:46.640 yourself and you have to know what you're likely to do i personally am not likely to quit when it gets

00:24:53.280 hard if anything i tend to get the ego in when it gets hard because i won't let something else deter me

00:24:59.840 even though maybe i ought to let it and do something else to your point yeah but you have to know yourself

00:25:05.040 another great instance this comes into play and i was thinking about this with um when i got when i

00:25:11.440 got injured like three i think three years ago when i tore my my bice i mean my uh pectoral muscle

00:25:18.400 i had that complete rupture man it was brutal and so it disrupted jujitsu it disrupted lifting

00:25:24.160 and it would have been very easy for me to give up on maintaining my health but i decided not to

00:25:32.480 and so i would go to class and in the corner i would do box step-ups i would do lunges i would

00:25:39.120 do air squats i would do whatever i could do but still be at class and still watch still participate

00:25:46.960 in the culture still be with the guys but do it to the degree that i could and when i came back i

00:25:53.360 remember the guys saying man you're like fresh like you're doing like how are you where you are right

00:25:58.320 now i'm like well i never stopped i may have stopped training jujitsu but i was still here

00:26:05.040 i was still watching you guys i was still staying in shape in fact all of the movements that i was

00:26:10.080 doing at that time in my life were all built around jujitsu so i was still flat i was probably more

00:26:15.200 flexible than i was before before and uh i would still go drill even you know i would do light just

00:26:22.800 drilling if i could once it recovered a little bit but that's a pivot that's to your point you know

00:26:28.320 there's going to be extenuating life circumstances that happen you could throw in the towel or you

00:26:33.920 could just say hey you know what this is my hand so we're gonna we're gonna deal with it the best we

00:26:38.000 can i like it man i like it chris henningson when forming a group of men for ongoing events such as

00:26:47.120 men's ministry at church what form of mass communication would you recommend texting only

00:26:52.400 allows 15 to 20 at a time and there's about 50 men in the church to get word out it's difficult to

00:26:58.640 have several text groups going to keep everyone connected a little tech question yeah i don't i

00:27:04.880 don't use whatsapp a whole lot as i've traveled outside of the country i've used that a little bit

00:27:08.880 more i don't know if a program like whatsapp or signal i think is another one i'm not real familiar

00:27:14.720 with these so don't don't take this like if they have a higher recipient count they might yeah they

00:27:21.520 might i don't know i'm sure there's other programs out there that do so i would look into other texting

00:27:26.320 software i know that there's there is software that for example one's called i think it's called band

00:27:33.600 let me look here whatsapp is 1000 oh there you go so you could start a whatsapp and put on everybody

00:27:41.920 in there and you're done yeah so there's the answer the other one is banned but that's designed

00:27:47.680 for a for sport sports programs that you could follow a couple other options you could use are

00:27:53.280 email but emails not affect it as efficient i would say is something like whatsapp and then of course you

00:28:00.000 can use social media too and just start off i would do that anyways so if you have your men's ministry

00:28:05.120 group i would start a facebook page called men's ministry or whatever your the name of your group is

00:28:10.960 so that not only are you texting but you have a place where you can give updates or drop pictures

00:28:17.280 or links to your photo gallery or the flyer that somebody put together you can put in there so i would

00:28:23.760 couple your uh your texting uh communication with your social media communication personally that's what

00:28:31.760 i would do yeah uh and i double check signals at a thousand as well in a group chat so there you go

00:28:36.880 so yeah there you go all right zach allen what kind of music are you into ryan and how about you kip

00:28:44.560 this question very often we don't i don't listen to a whole lot of music music's never been my thing

00:28:50.320 i'm not real musically inclined i don't really care all that much about it and when when music people

00:28:55.600 are like oh what do you listen to i'm like i don't care they're like what i can't believe and they're

00:29:00.880 like well what do you listen to when you're working out i'm like i listen to an ebook or podcast

00:29:05.280 wasn't that does that not get you fired up i'm like i don't really need to be fired up i go in

00:29:09.840 and i do my workouts and i work hard and i listen to ben shapiro or joe rogan or whatever i'm gonna

00:29:16.000 listen to but you know usually if if my kids are in the car or something like that i am gonna throw on

00:29:21.360 a podcast i mean excuse me music and it's usually red dirt radio red dirt country typically is what it is

00:29:28.240 yeah that's funny you know it's um it's funny this question came up like this morning uh do you

00:29:34.240 remember uh nilly vanilla do you guys yeah of course yeah yeah it was super fun i don't know why but like

00:29:40.080 one of those songs entered my mind i played it i was telling my daughters how like they were not the

00:29:44.720 real singers and you know to be kind of the drummer around stuff is really interesting and i was talking

00:29:50.640 about it this morning one of my employees were like you're the weirdest like i don't even know what kind

00:29:56.160 of music you listen to you just like listen to everything and that's that's pretty much the

00:30:00.080 answer i i love some countries it has to be a certain type of country that i love um but old

00:30:08.720 school classic rock uh hip-hop i don't like modern hip-hop but the old school classics from the 90s like

00:30:17.440 dre and stuff like absolutely so i i like everything depends on what i'm doing really

00:30:24.640 one thing i noticed um about myself and i've known this for a long time about myself is i get

00:30:32.960 agitated really quickly like i'm a hothead i get a temper and i get agitated and just bothered really

00:30:38.880 quickly and so if i'm going to listen to music i don't need to be hyped up yeah because i'm already

00:30:46.160 hyped up so i need something that brings it down a notch so like my kids will play new age hip-hop stuff

00:30:53.120 and it just infuriates me like i can feel just the blood boiling and my temperature rising and i get

00:31:02.560 mad so i don't need i've never needed anything to be fired up or motivated to no i i am so i don't

00:31:12.000 need more of it yeah you need some jack johnson or some hawaiian island island music playing in the

00:31:18.800 background absolutely yeah that's funny all right next question mario uh canteres how do you stay

00:31:28.720 disciplined and committed to your goals while you're out camping or on vacation so this is good for us

00:31:35.520 i dropped the ball i like the spin yeah i dropped the ball on my objectives and didn't execute any of

00:31:41.040 my tactics during my three-day camping trip my wife was happy and i had no complaints about my behavior

00:31:48.000 this time which i take as a win since i believe i'm maturing and escaping the mom matrix but i still

00:31:54.720 feel i should have executed at least on one or two of my tactics i'd like to know how i can avoid falling

00:32:02.080 off track when camping or hanging out with friends and family yeah i think that's a great question when

00:32:07.440 i when i heard you say how do you how do you stay disciplined i don't i'm tired of that question

00:32:12.640 because the answer is in the question you be disciplined if it didn't require discipline you

00:32:18.240 wouldn't need to be disciplined that's funny right so if you're like oh man this is easy then no

00:32:24.080 discipline is required i don't even need to be disciplined to go hang out with my my girlfriend

00:32:29.280 or my kids like that isn't a hard i actually like doing that it's not challenging for me so no discipline

00:32:35.280 is required the very fact that a person might ask how do you stay disciplined means that they need to

00:32:41.200 actually be disciplined and work through it but that wasn't the question the question is how do you

00:32:45.760 maintain that discipline and consistency when you're on vacation or family friends traveling that sort of

00:32:50.560 thing the answer is you just plan ahead so let's take workouts for example let's hypothetically say

00:32:57.600 that you work out monday through saturday at 6 a.m for an hour at the local gym down the street

00:33:04.400 but this weekend you're not going to be doing that on thursday friday saturday and sunday you're going

00:33:11.360 to be gone you're camping with your kids up in the mountains and so you don't have access to a gym

00:33:16.320 but you can still work out maybe it's you and your wife get up early one morning while the kids are

00:33:21.760 still asleep and you guys go for a little walk around the lake or that afternoon you and your kids

00:33:27.040 go on a hike or maybe you go out and you do a two or three mile run around the campgrounds or around

00:33:33.840 the site maybe it's um doing body weight movements that you would normally do at the gym with weight

00:33:40.320 but you're just going to do it with body weight i've done that in the hotel i don't know how many times

00:33:43.920 the best thing that you can do if you don't have a workout is very simply this 10 rounds of 10 push-ups

00:33:52.160 20 uh sit-ups and 30 air squats 10 rounds that is a an incredible workout anywhere you go

00:34:04.000 yeah so now some people might say especially when it comes to uh the battle plan which is what we use

00:34:10.400 inside of our brotherhood the iron council a lot of the times guys feel like they're not achieving their

00:34:15.760 battle plan because they're not doing the workout they said they were going to do this is the problem

00:34:20.880 of following things to the letter of the law rather than the spirit if you go out and you do a decent

00:34:27.760 hike for an hour or two hours or a three hour hike with your family that counts as a as your tactic

00:34:35.200 if you go out and you run three miles around the campsite when normally you're used to work that

00:34:39.760 counts of course that counts so don't be so rigid in your plan that to our earlier point that you can't

00:34:46.480 pivot and make adjustments as necessary another place that this comes into consideration is people

00:34:51.840 say this all the time when they go on vacation they have dieting plans and they go on vacation and their

00:34:56.640 diet goes to crap well every place you go to whether it's a fast food joint or a sit-down place

00:35:03.520 has a salad and chicken every single place and water so is it ideal is it perfect no but you're still

00:35:13.760 hitting it according to the spirit of the law rather than than the letter of the law so what i say is

00:35:19.200 just plan ahead uh pivot where you can and then one other strategy is having a secondary tactic so if

00:35:26.960 your primary tactic is i work out at the gym monday through saturday six days a week uh and i go for an

00:35:34.720 hour on weight training strength training specifically okay well what are you doing sunday does that mean you

00:35:39.360 you take the day off no your secondary tactic is active recovery so that might mean a family five

00:35:46.880 mile walk or a three mile hike or an hour of yoga and stretching but there's some secondary tactic

00:35:54.560 that takes the place of the primary when the primary isn't going to always work every single

00:35:59.040 day for the rest of your life that's what i would suggest that's great yeah nothing i'd add

00:36:04.800 some people might think they need a break and i would just challenge would your day be better if

00:36:11.360 you did those things and most of the answer is always yes oh man i'm at disney and went with the

00:36:17.680 family if you woke up earlier and got your run in would you feel better about your day and the answer

00:36:24.160 usually always is yes so don't don't use it as an excuse when you know that it allows you to show up

00:36:30.240 more powerfully that day but i but i will say though kip sometimes you do need a break i think

00:36:36.000 part of to go back to what i was saying earlier about my injury i think part of that was i was just

00:36:39.920 being stupid and the other part of it was my body was worn down because i was going hard at the time

00:36:47.600 and i didn't really listen to that and so i think i probably could have used a break i was also drinking

00:36:54.240 heavily at the time which is not doing any favors for my body and recovery and all that my sleep's off and

00:37:00.400 my mental health is way off so obviously that had a big factor but sometimes you do need a break and

00:37:05.600 what i would say to that is you i've said this before like on the weekends what i'll tell the

00:37:12.240 iron council guys is our plan continues but our tempo changes so on the weekdays you may be going

00:37:19.600 80 90 of your capacity on the weekdays you're not going to change anything you're still going to

00:37:24.640 do your workouts you're still going to eat properly you're still going to love on your family

00:37:29.920 but you're going to do it at 60 to 70 tempo so that you can have some recovery in there as you

00:37:35.680 push into the following week so we don't we don't take breaks we just change up the tempo as needed

00:37:42.400 yeah i love that all right next question john preston how does one make the transition from

00:37:50.560 theoretical knowledge to practical application i've studied a lot to improve my leadership and find

00:37:56.960 myself helping others all the time with leadership questions and contributing to conversations around

00:38:02.720 leadership but if i have to be honest i think i'm terrible at execution how does one round that bend

00:38:09.520 good question it is i like this question this is something a lot of people deal with uh

00:38:16.720 i made this distinction in the iron council on one of our calls last week usually people fall into one

00:38:21.760 of two camps you're either an over thinker or an over actor so personally i'm an over actor i don't

00:38:28.960 think about things before i do them i just do them and sometimes it works out really well because my

00:38:34.320 intuition is pretty honed for the most part and sometimes it's complete catastrophe i lose time money

00:38:41.680 energy sleep i lose friends i leave a wake of collateral damage in my path because

00:38:47.440 i see that thing i go for it so a guy like me can stand to think a little bit more but then you have

00:38:53.680 over thinkers where they'll never take action and a guy like that could stand to apply a little bit

00:38:58.560 more so since it's john that's asking this question yeah so with him what i would say is be very aware of

00:39:07.680 how much information you're consuming because the likelihood of you consuming too much information is

00:39:15.120 probably pretty high and you become i think andy frisilla calls it uh either a learning zombie or

00:39:21.200 an information zombie where you have all this information but you're so inundated and overwhelmed

00:39:26.800 that you just never take any action so i would try switching up your ratio so for example if you

00:39:32.720 think man i'm going to read 12 books or maybe uh three books by the end of the year what i would say is

00:39:40.160 instead of the three why don't you read one book by the end of the year and then make a written plan

00:39:47.600 of the three things not 10 things the three things that you are going to focus on for the next eight

00:39:55.120 weeks of the year so whatever whatever you're consuming right now throttle it back and i'm not

00:40:02.640 saying be lazy i'm not saying don't learn i'm saying throttle it back so it gives you the capacity to take

00:40:08.000 better action um another place that this might uh come into consideration is with your wife for

00:40:15.840 example you might be learning all these things and reading all these books and hearing from all of the

00:40:20.880 different guys of the iron council about what you should do but i'll tell you what the pareto principle

00:40:25.120 states that 80 of your results are going to come from 20 of your efforts so right now you're focused on

00:40:32.000 the 80 that's producing 20 why not focus on doing the 20 that's going to produce the 80 so what

00:40:37.360 might that look like with your wife i'd say it's a date night a week and i would probably say it's an

00:40:44.800 evening conversation like real conversation of how was your day what went well how are you feeling about

00:40:55.360 your goals and how like what plans do we have coming up man if you just changed those two things about

00:41:01.760 your relationship and you didn't worry about consuming any other information you'd be in a

00:41:07.120 much better spot than you are right now regardless of where you are unequivocally you'd be in a much

00:41:12.400 better spot so focus on the 20 for the 80 pareto principle and stop consuming so much information

00:41:19.120 yeah well and i love the fact that you're asking this question john because it it and you kind of

00:41:24.400 alluded to in your question it actually does matter like the theoretical is not enough so and this isn't

00:41:33.200 my opinion i mean in the spirit of learning and development uh look up bloom's taxonomy what's the

00:41:40.560 lowest level of comprehension remembering up from that understanding up from that is applying it you're

00:41:49.360 hanging out in applying right you're consuming remembering understanding and applying it to

00:41:54.240 other people analyzing is above applying then evaluation and the highest level of cognitive

00:42:01.760 understanding is in the spirit of creation you need to get to creation and the reason why is because

00:42:09.600 it's going to get way more exciting and and you're going to be able to come up with innovative ideas

00:42:15.360 uh different approaches different angles that you see in a particular subject around leadership that

00:42:22.080 you're not going to get at when you're applying and memorizing somewhat of someone else's framework

00:42:28.080 you want to make your framework and when you're making yours oh man you're going to light up and

00:42:33.920 you're going to be able to bring passion to the table that you normally wouldn't otherwise and the

00:42:38.800 only way you're going to create is in the application of of actually applying it and doing it

00:42:43.840 so double down in your thought process in my opinion get to implementation and creation

00:42:50.960 well and you know on that too so well hold on i wanted to ask you questions so you said uh

00:42:55.440 remembering understanding applying analyzing there was something else evaluating and then creating

00:43:00.960 evaluating then creating and that's called what that's called the bloom's taxonomy so these are

00:43:06.880 levels of cognitive understanding of stuff right so when you look at the public school system

00:43:12.880 and universities what are they doing remembering yeah remembering that they're literally operating

00:43:19.280 at the lowest level of cognitive understanding interesting and it doesn't stick with you until you

00:43:26.160 the highest echelon of this is in creation taking multiple ideas and making them your own and and

00:43:33.280 and making stuff which is ironic and quite godly and there's a bunch of gospel principles in that's

00:43:39.440 in my opinion yes right but but nonetheless you want to get to that level just because you're going

00:43:44.640 to be able to serve people better once you're there versus like oh this framework over here is really

00:43:50.560 great and i have it memorized and let's help people apply it that's not enough you're scratching the

00:43:55.120 surface of your understanding so i'm going to paint a little bit that's really helpful i just wrote that

00:44:00.480 down but i'm going to paint a little bit of a false dichotomy here for people but it'll help illustrate

00:44:04.800 the concept i personally would rather have 80 the intelligence of some of the smartest people on the

00:44:10.720 planet or maybe even 60 of their intelligence if i can produce 200 of what they can that's a trade-off

00:44:18.800 that i'm willing to make and some of i won't say dumb but some of the least intelligent people are

00:44:24.480 also some of the most successful because they don't get hamstringed and caught up in so much information

00:44:31.920 they're really good at taking the pertinent key information ditching the rest because it's

00:44:37.280 unnecessary and then applying what they need to apply elon musk is actually he's so this is the

00:44:44.240 false dichotomy he's brilliant but he's also somebody who applies very rapidly and if you've

00:44:49.920 listened to any of his conversations and interviews that he's done he challenges whether or not things are

00:44:55.520 needed so we take he took the nasa space program and took this out and stripped this and move this and

00:45:01.440 pulled this and got rid of this and canned that and he just narrowed it down and now he's catching

00:45:06.640 rocket boosters out of the air with a mechanical arm so that that's that's that's an example of

00:45:14.240 somebody who can think on the pertinent and apply the relevant totally and we use this example with

00:45:21.680 summoning a peak and we have false summits and you don't know the best path until you get to the ridge

00:45:27.760 getting to the ridge is in the creation is it it's actually in the action not in the plan before you

00:45:34.720 left the trail yeah yeah you have to be there awesome yeah well what's next all right sorry i

00:45:41.440 got derailed let me get back to my questions all right uh aiden todd crandall i'm always interested in

00:45:47.280 any tips for keeping one's priorities in the forefront of your mind so that when temptation comes along in

00:45:53.440 any form you can make the right choice and power through also jocko frequently talks about taking

00:46:00.400 a step back to consider how to respond instead of reacting but i'd love to hear your suggestions for

00:46:05.840 how to do this in a heated moment yeah well i mean he's right jocko's definitely right you you have to

00:46:13.120 step back especially when you feel your blood boiling are you getting contentious or being triggered

00:46:18.880 and then the the best question that i can ask myself in those moments or even moments of temptation

00:46:24.960 or moments of procrastination is is what i'm doing right now serving me your other people yeah

00:46:34.400 so if i'm if i'm in an argument with one of my kids is this argument serving me or them no but then

00:46:42.720 the other side of me says well this is a conversation that needs to be had not disagreeing with that how are

00:46:48.000 you having the conversation and in what way can you frame this conversation so that it actually serves

00:46:54.000 you and your child and the relationship that you guys have and their own development and that's that

00:46:59.760 critical piece that i think might be missing in that in that puzzle is is not just taking a step back

00:47:05.600 but asking yourself is this what i should be doing yeah and you all know like there's some decisions

00:47:12.480 where you just know this is the right decision if you're sitting down and you're playing with your

00:47:16.400 kids or you're cooking dinner for your family or you're having a good conversation with your

00:47:20.400 significant other or you're working with a client or you're working on a new business plan no problem

00:47:26.480 you know you should be doing that or at the gym but then there's other moments where you try to talk

00:47:32.160 yourself into oh this is okay i deserve a break no one's gonna know this i deserve this these are all

00:47:42.240 little justifications that we say where we start to realize that we're on the wrong path and getting

00:47:47.600 on the wrong path the right path is a matter of asking is what i'm doing right now going to serve

00:47:54.080 me or other people so i think about you hear this all the time guys losing themselves and getting caught

00:48:02.560 up in either a momentary affair or a long-term affair and imagine if you just asked is this relationship

00:48:09.360 serving me and other people well it's not serving you because you're going to get a divorce you're

00:48:13.440 going to lose half your wealth you're going to be ostracized from your kids so it's not serving you

00:48:17.920 it's not serving your wife because you said you'd be faithful to her you're not she's going to feel

00:48:23.600 rejected and quite frankly she is and she's going to be embarrassed and hurt and she's going to lose

00:48:28.560 her family too because of this and it's not serving the person that you're having an affair with because

00:48:34.320 maybe they're married or you're helping them participate in immorality so like it serves

00:48:41.680 nobody to engage in that behavior and therefore you can make a choice knowing that this is not

00:48:46.960 serving or helping anyone yeah there there's a couple things that come to mind the the first is

00:48:53.680 like what opportunity is placed before me in the moment like what's what's available to me right now

00:48:59.840 and and and it's just saying the same thing that you just said slightly different it was really

00:49:04.960 interesting i had this moment yesterday i'm i'm in my room and i'm i think i was trying to watch that

00:49:12.480 that youtube video of trump and rogan and koa he's six just turned six and he's like obsessed with

00:49:20.880 football right like and it's almost annoying right he's chucking the ball to himself trying to catch it

00:49:27.280 and like asking me a hundred questions can i drop the ball and pick it up is it still a touchdown can

00:49:32.160 i do this is it a touchdown i'm like dude just shut up right like i'm doing my thing right and and i i

00:49:39.120 paused and i remember thinking literally i was sitting there i go what's available to me right now

00:49:46.720 and what was available is for him to share and see that i was excited and pouring into him

00:49:53.680 that's it and so i put the stupid phone down and i was just a hundred percent focused on him and his

00:50:04.960 little passes to himself and you know landing on the ground like did you see that catch you know

00:50:10.640 and i was i was just present and so there's moments like that always in all that we do

00:50:16.400 that man if we're not careful we're losing the opportunity something i said to that youth

00:50:23.120 yesterday in that resilience class is the physical elements of our life allow us to have emotional

00:50:30.080 resilience when we look at how the nutrition when we look at our rest when we look at our exercise when

00:50:38.800 all those help you uh aiden deal better in those top priority items but if you're neglecting your

00:50:50.960 body your nutrition your exercise mentally these things even become more difficult and so i i just

00:50:57.280 want to call that out your ability to step back also has to do with what preparation and things that

00:51:04.000 you're doing in your life to make sure that you're mentally capable of doing that well kip there's

00:51:10.800 been so many formulations that i've made over the past 10 years that i don't know beforehand i would

00:51:16.240 have recognized exist so for example what does financial prosperity have to do with making moral decisions

00:51:24.560 that's one that i've often heard so let me give you an example of a weird connection you might not

00:51:29.520 consider let's consider that your employer comes to you and says hey i need you to fill out this form

00:51:37.520 and you look at this form and this form is completely fraudulent whatever this form is has on it is

00:51:42.320 either deceptive or is not an accurate representation of what really happened and the the company's trying

00:51:49.200 to sweep something under the rug and they want you to put your name on that fraudulent form

00:51:54.960 so now where do we get into the financial factor of this well if you've been horrible with your

00:52:03.280 finances over the past 10 or 15 or 20 years you're up to your eyeballs in debt uh you you don't know where

00:52:09.520 your next meal is going to come from you have no money saved are you more or less likely to jeopardize

00:52:15.360 your morals and put yourself at risk for a company that would gladly can you if they had the opportunity

00:52:20.960 of course you're more likely to fill that form on the other hand let's say you've got a hundred

00:52:27.280 thousand dollars in the bank you've got 175 000 you owe on one mortgage another house is paid off all

00:52:34.320 your cars are paid off no consumer debt no medical debt no student loans and you've got seven eight

00:52:39.920 thousand dollars of discretionary income a month and your boss says hey i need you to sign this form and do

00:52:45.360 this are you more or less likely to sign that form less likely because you're in a financial spot

00:52:50.640 where your morals don't have to be questioned because it's not really a factor of whether i'm

00:52:56.000 going to be okay financially totally so all of these little connections that i've made over the past 10

00:53:01.600 years to me just continue to astound me yeah let me make some more so here's here's some more

00:53:07.760 connections so i my alarm goes off at six i had plans to get up at six and go to the jail gym but i made

00:53:15.120 excuses and i didn't go so i slept in i'm now feeling a little down on myself right because i

00:53:22.400 didn't get that workout in i'm out of integrity to some extent i'm rushed because i slept in to get my

00:53:27.760 kids out the door i'm yelling at them hey you know get your shoes on the morning's chaotic we get in the

00:53:33.520 car i drop them off i still i feel a little bit bad about my relationship now about how i showed up with

00:53:39.120 my kids i get to work there's conversations that i'm not addressing because they're uncomfortable

00:53:45.120 and i'm not courageous and i really hate this guy that's that i have to work with but i haven't

00:53:50.080 addressed it and so i have that weight on me and then i'm pissed off about my employer because i i'm

00:53:55.840 in debt and i'm stressed as hell because of the weight of meeting the mortgage and paying the bills

00:54:02.160 i come home and then we get a question like this that says well you know how do i step back and have

00:54:07.760 a clear state of mind you're not going to have a clear state of mind because your world is a mess

00:54:17.360 it's a mess because so many things are out of place and we talk about this man you get margin

00:54:24.800 it's really easy to to be a great dad when things at work are buttoned up it's really it's a lot easier

00:54:32.400 to be empathetic and compassionate when your finances aren't chaotic it's easier to be that way

00:54:40.240 when my health is in good check but when they're all a mess good luck i don't know anybody that's

00:54:47.200 going to handle those circumstances well when there's that much chaos happening well i mean i think

00:54:53.600 about like another scenario on the work thing is let's say you got a busy day at work and you're

00:55:01.040 kind of slacking off you're procrastinating you don't really get it done you know your buddy calls

00:55:06.080 he's like hey man let's go to lunch you take a little longer lunch than you normally would even

00:55:09.680 though you know how busy you are and it comes down to five o'clock and you're like damn i didn't get

00:55:14.720 anything done today and you're pissed off you're like i should stay late but my wife wants me there the

00:55:19.840 kids and so i'll just go home but you've got work on your brain because you know you haven't been

00:55:24.160 doing the work you should have been doing the day you get home and she had a bad day and she decides

00:55:28.720 to say something snippy to you yeah the good man would be like hey hon i don't know why you said that

00:55:37.200 is everything okay that's what the good man would do yeah and she would say no i'm sorry i had a bad day

00:55:44.080 it's like cool like you need a minute like i'll take the kit like we'll do stuff like why don't you go

00:55:48.160 take some time and relax that's what the good man would do but the procrastinating man the guy that

00:55:53.120 you were today who you shouldn't have been is like well yeah well what about this and then you make

00:55:58.720 another comment back to her and now she's pissed now you're pissed and the kids come in and then

00:56:04.080 you piss them off because they're pissing you off and it just turns into a nightmare because you took

00:56:08.960 an hour and a half long break when you should have just taken 45 minutes yeah it's it is why and i'm

00:56:14.880 only saying that because i've been in that in that boat all of us have we all have yeah there's one

00:56:20.400 other thing i wanted to say kip and then we're beating this one to death but um there's one more

00:56:24.880 question or at least thought that has been helpful for me and these are subjective thoughts but it's okay

00:56:33.120 because it's my life and so i get to decide what they mean but uh a real man would or wouldn't

00:56:40.000 that's what you ask yourself that that's what i that's what i tell myself a real man would do this

00:56:46.720 in this situation this is what a real man would do or you know a real man wouldn't engage in that

00:56:53.760 behavior and i know when i say that some people don't like that a real man who gets to decide i do

00:56:59.280 because i'm trying to be a good man so that's what i'm saying it's subjective but you could use a lot of

00:57:03.840 different words a real man a genuine man a godly man an honorable man a faithful man a christian man

00:57:12.000 a good man like you can use any word that is going to help you make better moral decisions in those gray

00:57:20.000 areas and if you know like hey no you know what a family man wouldn't neglect his kids when his kids

00:57:26.880 say hey dad will you throw the football with me it's a it is subjective but it's also a moral standard

00:57:33.040 that you're deciding to hold yourself to and that's been helpful for me yeah that's great yeah

00:57:38.560 thanks for bringing that back around when i was looking at aden's question i was like oh man maybe

00:57:42.160 we didn't actually address it but you just did so good stuff we'll get there it takes us a little while

00:57:47.760 speaking of going off on tangents and circling back around we'll get there at some point yeah all

00:57:52.880 right jason teasley our last question you have previously talked about knowing your enemies

00:57:58.320 and my question is how does one figure out how to defeat their enemy when they figure out that their

00:58:04.160 biggest enemy is themselves i like that yeah i like the evil laugh there at the end too yeah yeah

00:58:11.520 most of the time the enemy is is yourself you know unless you're in battle or active combat or somebody's

00:58:16.880 actively you know trying to perpetuate violence against you the real enemy is going to be yourself and

00:58:22.560 you may have heard me talk about this and frame it as the natural man the natural man is lazy he's

00:58:29.200 weak he's cowardly he's contentious he wants the result without the effort he'll lie steal cheat

00:58:35.600 whatever he has to do in order to do that and every single one of us have that natural man within us

00:58:41.280 so the fight that we have to get up and fight every single day is how do we be the honorable and good and

00:58:46.880 faithful man that we were talking about earlier and beat off this natural tendency to fall prey to the

00:58:55.280 natural man the general answer is you really need to spend some time thinking about where you're weak

00:59:04.400 procrastination for example is not really something that i'm susceptible to it's not but but patience is

00:59:14.160 i'm really impatient and sometimes i a lot of the times i rub people the wrong way or i try to force

00:59:22.400 things that don't really belong or don't go together or need to be a little bit more thought out

00:59:27.200 i know that about myself or if one of my kids you know does something i get pissed off and impatient

00:59:33.440 very very quickly i know that about myself and i don't try to hide it i don't try to pretend it doesn't

00:59:40.160 exist i'm intimately familiar and aware of what triggers me what pisses me off what gets me going

00:59:46.960 what riles me up i have to be aware of it so that i can combat it so in that example i just gave you

00:59:53.600 of the kids the best thing for me to do is have some margin and space between the time that i have

01:00:01.200 appointments or uh the time that i shut down work to the time i spend with them so i can decompress and

01:00:07.600 process everything that went throughout the day so i can be more fully present for them

01:00:12.800 there's probably a thousand different examples i can give you but the biggest thing is to know

01:00:16.720 yourself and what really pisses you off what really irritates you and what you're susceptible to is the

01:00:22.400 natural man and then come up with a game plan for dealing with it so if you asked me hey ryan um

01:00:31.200 i tend to be really lazy then i could give you a better answer as to how to combat that so i'm just

01:00:36.400 giving you a general answer because it's a pretty broad question but i hope that helps yeah i mean

01:00:41.120 know your red flags and then come up with a plan for when those red flags show up so that way you can

01:00:47.520 immediately act yeah so if you want to ask a follow-up question next week that actually i you know i'll

01:00:54.400 challenge you to do that yeah so in the next week i want you to spend some time thinking about what you're

01:01:01.280 susceptible to and then let me know and then kip you and i will come up with maybe some very good

01:01:08.480 strategic or tactical advice on how to combat that one element i have to say this just because

01:01:15.600 i see this too often where especially in psychology and i probably have a negative too much of a negative

01:01:22.640 opinion about psychiatrists but but nonetheless people will latch on to this idea that they're the enemy

01:01:28.880 right that like i have these negative self-talk and then they'll have negative self-talk around the

01:01:34.080 fact that they have negative self-talk right and then like oh i can't get it i'm always the enemy i

01:01:38.320 have this human tendencies i hate them and and they'll just hate on themselves around it and and i'm not

01:01:45.120 sure if jason's in that space but like be careful right like everything that ryan just said right we

01:01:50.800 have these human tendencies these natural man that that we have an inclination to act upon

01:01:59.200 and it's not good and it's not bad it just is and and it's up to you to navigate that so try not to

01:02:07.600 get like too much into this space that something's wrong with you because of this is very normal everybody

01:02:13.920 has these things and it's awesome that we identify them i'm not saying we just throw our hands up and

01:02:20.000 be victims of them but also don't make yourself wrong for having these tendencies that do show up

01:02:27.920 from time to time just do something about it is all well i mean that's what society does to men

01:02:33.920 you know they tell men that that uh being aggressive or being competitive or being stoic or

01:02:40.960 have a propensity for violence or risk-taking is inherently bad it's not bad it's well it's not

01:02:46.560 also it's not good either it just is i just say it's amoral yeah you know if i and i've used this

01:02:53.200 example but if i if i have a if i get angry about something maybe i see a child being abused and i get angry

01:03:02.160 about that i think most of us would say that's righteous anger yeah okay but if i get unnecessarily

01:03:09.920 angry because my kid makes a dumb mistake and i decide to be the abuser that's unrighteous anger

01:03:17.520 they're both anger it's just how you harness it so anger alone is not moral laziness is another one

01:03:25.040 we talked about why would anybody be lazy because we're human beings biologically hardwired to consume

01:03:33.760 as many calories as possible and dispense of as few as possible sounds like a lazy

01:03:42.640 of course so you're you're fighting your natural that's why it's natural men you're fighting the

01:03:48.560 natural tendency to burn as few calories as possible and exhibit as little energy as possible if you've

01:03:55.440 ever watched uh alone uh they they spend months out in the wilderness and that's their goal how do i

01:04:03.360 get food and shelter and preserve and with the minimum amount of effort required and the person

01:04:12.880 who can do that the best will win yeah so your body's designed to be lazy yeah and fat by the way also

01:04:20.560 yep so it's you got to fight against it every single day it's crazy so do you have a couple spots open

01:04:27.840 for the the pistol course for anybody that's in the utah area yeah we have two to five spots uh we

01:04:34.960 actually ended up selling it out so we opened another course but it's november 16th uh and it's

01:04:40.640 there's an eight to noon class and a noon to four class i'm gonna be at both of them uh this is done

01:04:45.840 through uh another business that i'm that i'm a part owner and founder in called m42 adventures so if

01:04:52.240 you're interested in m42 adventures m42 adventures.com uh if you want to know about the pistol course i

01:04:57.840 don't think we have it available on the website right now because it's sold out so fast but if

01:05:01.840 you just email me ryan at order of man.com uh i'll get you the details but that's in st george utah

01:05:09.520 so southern utah november 16th eight to noon or noon to four excellent and then do you want to mention the

01:05:16.320 event the forge event that's right yeah we've got the forge event coming up in the spring it's our

01:05:21.600 very first event of 2025 and we're doing it differently i've got larry hagener with the

01:05:27.040 dad edge connor beat with man talks matt boudreau with apogee strong all partnering up kip i hope you're

01:05:32.640 going to be out there too we'll talk about the dates and the timeline and how i how i'd like you to

01:05:36.160 participate if you're interested uh but yeah it's going to be i i'm i'm hesitant to say you know like

01:05:43.040 boy scouts because i don't want to make light of it but also it's a little bit like boy scout camp

01:05:48.880 but for men where we're going to go out and we're going to do physical activities and we're going

01:05:53.360 to have physical and mental hardship but we're also going to hear from incredible guest speakers

01:05:59.840 there's going to be panels available we're staying in in lodges on site so all the food all the lodging

01:06:06.960 is covered all you have to do is get there that other events don't do it like that we've got a huge

01:06:12.320 chow hall where we come in and we all eat together and it's going to be amazing so if you want to go to

01:06:18.320 if you want to go to like man camp then man camp you can you can you can look at it like that

01:06:26.080 that's awesome awesome yeah okay all right guys appreciate you kip thank you for uh co-hosting

01:06:31.680 with me as always i love your your insight i i like that we're usually on the same page but we come at

01:06:37.440 it in a different way and that's valuable for me because it's a lot your your way is a lot more

01:06:42.880 thoughtful than mine and so that rounds me out for sure and you get better results so

01:06:48.800 i don't know about that i just piss more people off so maybe it looks like i get more attention but

01:06:54.560 i don't think that means better results all right you guys appreciate you we'll be back on friday

01:06:59.920 until then go out there take action and become the man you are meant to be

01:07:04.000 thank you for listening to the order of man podcast you're ready to take charge of your life

01:07:12.560 and be more of the man you were meant to be we invite you to join the order at order of man dot com

Order of Man - October 30, 2024

The Difference Between Quitting and Pivoting, Application Over Knowledge, & Maintaining Priorities ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

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