Order of Man


The Do's and Don'ts of Divorce | FRIDAY FIELD NOTES


Episode Stats

Misogynist Sentences

8

Hate Speech Sentences

4


Summary

In this episode, I talk about my experience with divorce and how I was able to recover from it. I also talk about the do's and don'ts when it comes to divorce and what to do if you are facing the possibility of going through a divorce.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 early in our marriage, even in dating, I forgot about my friends. I pushed them aside. I didn't
00:00:05.720 do anything with them. I didn't reach out to them. I didn't go on trips or adventures or anything
00:00:09.740 like that with them because I thought I was doing what I should be doing. It was several years into
00:00:13.740 our marriage. We went through our separation and I realized, oh shit, I'm alone. I'm all alone.
00:00:20.040 My friends are still there. They're still doing things, but I forsaked them. I didn't build those
00:00:24.840 male friendships. So if you're not already building friendships with other men, then you need to do
00:00:30.000 that right now. Men, I've got a very important message for you today. Whether you found yourself
00:00:38.540 staring down the barrel of a divorce or maybe you haven't and you're happily married, maybe you're
00:00:45.640 even a newlywed or you're considering asking for her hand in marriage. I want to share some things
00:00:52.540 with you because something happened to me three years ago that I never would have imagined
00:00:57.120 happening. And that is that I went through a divorce and I was very public about some of the things that
00:01:03.420 led up to the divorce and for better or worse, some of the fallout and the ramifications of that.
00:01:12.580 And over the past three years, I've learned a lot of valuable insight, not only as I navigate and walk
00:01:20.580 through uncharted territory, but as I talk with thousands and thousands of men on a weekly and
00:01:27.800 monthly basis who are dealing with divorce, who have overcome divorce, who are being threatened
00:01:34.280 with divorce. And really what I want to do is give you some do's and don'ts, five do's, five don'ts
00:01:41.180 when it comes to divorce. And then I'm going to give you one other very powerful resource at the end of
00:01:46.500 this podcast. So stick around. Um, I'm going to share just briefly cause I've been very vocal and
00:01:52.100 public about this, but I'm going to share briefly a little bit about my experience. Um, on July 31st,
00:01:59.160 2022, uh, my ex-wife, uh, and I were having a conversation in the bedroom of our house in Maine.
00:02:09.780 Um, and honestly, I, I cannot remember why we started to have the conversation. And the reason
00:02:17.240 I can't remember is because I was already drinking by that time. And it was a Sunday morning and I was
00:02:24.900 drinking and she had said something to me. I can't remember what she said, but what I do remember is
00:02:31.500 thinking, wait a second. And I told her this, are you saying you want to divorce? And she said, yes.
00:02:36.620 And at that point, uh, I had to really confront my alcohol addiction. I had to confront some issues
00:02:45.620 that I was dealing with some demons. I would say, I think that's a little dramatic, but I had to
00:02:51.840 confront a lot of what I had been dealing with up to that point. And, uh, immediately I started
00:02:57.500 attending AA meetings. Um, I, I hired a therapist through betterhelp.com and I went to work
00:03:06.540 on improving myself because I thought if this is going to happen, I'm going to do everything I can
00:03:11.900 to salvage the marriage, to reclaim the marriage, to, uh, be together. I still believe in the sanctity
00:03:18.840 of marriage. I still believe in the importance of marriage. Um, but unfortunately it did not work out
00:03:25.500 for me. Some of that had to do with my own behavior and some of that had to do with hers. And I want to be
00:03:32.260 very clear about the fact that it takes two to tango and I'll own everything I can, but there's
00:03:39.620 two parties in a relationship like this. And, uh, it is what it is. So I spent six months trying to
00:03:46.980 salvage my marriage. This podcast is going to be a lot different because I don't really enjoy talking
00:03:53.280 about this sort of thing, but it is important. And as I said earlier, a little too little, a little too
00:04:04.180 late. And, uh, I was not able to salvage the marriage and I moved from Maine back to Utah with, uh, with her
00:04:14.500 and with my children. And I remember the day that we were unpacking the U-Haul that her brother, my
00:04:24.380 brother-in-law now ex-brother-in-law had brought to the house in Utah, the house that we had moved from
00:04:30.260 and her parents were there. And I, you know, everybody was amicable. And I remember unloading
00:04:37.060 that U-Haul and putting everything out into the shop in the backyard. And it was devastating.
00:04:45.980 You know, I put on a happy face and, and, and I was a brave warrior, if you will, but inside I was
00:04:53.660 falling apart and I was devastated because of my own actions, but I was also devastated because
00:05:00.980 this, this, this thing that I had thought was going to stand the test of time did not.
00:05:08.420 And I spent months and months wondering what I could have done differently. I spent months floundering
00:05:15.480 around trying to find myself a lot of lonely nights, a lot of dark and cold and isolated moments in my
00:05:23.560 life. And I, fortunately I was never suicidal, but it was the darkest time in my life.
00:05:30.980 And. Fast forward over three years now, um, just about three years since my divorce. And I can tell
00:05:40.140 you that I'm in a much better place. I did some things right. And I also did some things wrong.
00:05:45.220 And if you find yourself standard staring down a divorce, I want to share a couple of things with
00:05:49.620 you. And then, like I said, give you a resource. So let's, let's break this down. I'm going to share
00:05:53.800 the do nots first, and then I'm going to share the dues with you. So number one, do not guys do not
00:06:00.220 sedate yourself. There's a lot of different ways to sedate yourself. You can sedate yourself with
00:06:04.380 alcohol, which was my drug of choice, uh, or drugs or pornography or getting wrapped up in work or a
00:06:12.640 bunch of mindless, trivial nonsense, social media scrolling. Um, that might feel good in the moment
00:06:21.820 because it gives you some sort of temporary relief from what you're dealing with. But over the long
00:06:28.940 haul, um, it, it doesn't serve you. It doesn't serve you to ignore what's really happening. It
00:06:36.200 doesn't serve you to drive down the way you're feeling and your emotions and the frustration and
00:06:42.600 the anger, and maybe even the hostility. You need to confront those things. So I said this in a post
00:06:50.460 that I made on the socials the other day, you're going to need your wits about you. Uh, and I stole
00:06:56.640 that from Randall Wallace, who is actually a previous podcast guest, and he is the writer of, of Braveheart
00:07:03.900 and Mel Gibson's character, William Wallace says that he needs his wits about him. And he refuses the
00:07:13.120 drugs that the woman that loves him offers for mercy. You need to refuse that. You need to sit in
00:07:22.260 it. You need to wallow in it. You need to become intimate and familiar with what you're dealing with.
00:07:27.160 So you can begin to come up with better solutions. Number two, guys, do not sedate yourself. Um,
00:07:35.480 that, that, that's the most important thing. I can't say that enough, but outside of that,
00:07:38.920 do not stock because that's a form of sedation as well. You're trying to figure out what she's
00:07:46.080 doing. You're stocking her social media accounts. Um, maybe you're driving by her house or your old
00:07:53.640 house. Uh, you're trying to figure out what her schedule is. You're showing up where, you know,
00:07:58.120 she will be based on her schedule. Don't, don't do that. Right. Let the dead bury the dead.
00:08:04.520 And I'm not saying that literally. Okay. I hope you know that I'm going to talk a little bit about
00:08:10.820 that here in a second, but what she does is no longer your concern. And I know that's hard in
00:08:19.420 the moment where you have a woman that you love that you cannot have. And psych psychology tells us
00:08:24.020 that we crave more deeply what we cannot have. And you can't have her right now or potentially ever.
00:08:33.340 And you need to man up, you need to sack up and you need to acknowledge that she is no longer with
00:08:40.360 you. She wants nothing to do with you. She doesn't want to be with you. She doesn't want to be your
00:08:45.380 partner. And I know this sounds harsh. There was a moment that I had, uh, with my ex-wife
00:08:51.800 was after we had moved back to Utah and she said something to me and I'm not going to get
00:08:58.160 hyper specific in this, but she said something to me. And that was the moment I realized this is over
00:09:04.040 and it was devastating. It was heartbreaking and it was cathartic and it was liberating.
00:09:10.600 It was all of the things at once. And what I realized is that in that moment, I was free.
00:09:17.080 I was free to pursue a new life. I was free to make myself better. I was free to improve. I was
00:09:23.620 free to do what I wanted to do outside of me wanting to get her back at the time.
00:09:31.120 And the sooner that you can just cut it off completely, like ripping the bandaid off a wound,
00:09:37.160 do it. Don't drag it on. Don't text her. Don't drunk text her, heaven forbid.
00:09:43.200 Um, don't stop by her house. Don't stalk her. Just don't. It's done. Cut it off completely.
00:09:53.960 Or if you have children and other affairs you need to deal with to the minimum degree that you
00:09:58.680 possibly can do not stock and just rip the bandaid off. Number three, don't sleep around.
00:10:04.180 All right. I know that you're probably looking to be validated by a woman
00:10:08.800 because that's what she potentially brought into the relationship that you had, but don't do that
00:10:14.140 because if you continue to sleep around or you attempt to sleep around, it's going to feel good
00:10:20.300 for about seven to eight minutes for some of you shorter, for some of you longer, it's going to
00:10:26.600 feel really good for about that amount of time. But after that, you're going to feel like a piece of
00:10:30.700 trash because you are, what you're doing is you're using women to fill a void, to feel a need,
00:10:40.160 a desire that you have at the expense of her. And you're actually damaging her, whoever that woman is,
00:10:46.300 even if she's voluntarily engaged in the process, you're hurting her. And you're also hurting yourself
00:10:52.540 because you're cheapening what it means to be sexually intimate with another woman. I get it.
00:11:00.700 We're men. We're physical in nature. We derive a lot of our sense of worth and validation from
00:11:08.880 being physically intimate with the people, the women that we love. I understand. Don't do it. Go rub one
00:11:16.240 out if you have to. Take a cold shower. Think about your grandma. Whatever you have to do to avoid
00:11:26.880 sleeping with other women, using other women as masturbatory tools, and also sedation in the
00:11:34.120 cheapest, most degrading way for her and for you possible. Don't sleep around. It's very easy to do
00:11:42.340 that. There's a lot of risk with that when it comes to disease, with unwanted pregnancy. And I've
00:11:48.280 heard horror stories of that. And just the degeneracy of engaging in that behavior with
00:11:58.220 someone you're not committed to. It hurts her. It hurts you. And don't do it. Number four, don't kill
00:12:04.060 yourself. All right. I hope this goes without saying I have never in my life been suicidal.
00:12:09.200 I can't say that I haven't had thoughts of what that would be or what that would look like,
00:12:14.700 but I have never been suicidal. But to the degree that I can, I've, I've had friends who
00:12:23.560 have committed suicide. I've had family members who have committed suicide. I've never been there
00:12:30.080 personally, but I, I do try to understand where people are coming from, how dark and desperate and
00:12:36.620 deep it must be. That's a temporary problem that you're dealing with. And it is temporary guys.
00:12:41.980 I'm three years post-divorce, almost three years post-divorce. And I'll tell you, I'm in such a
00:12:49.040 great place in my life right now. But if I would have ended my life two, three, three and a half years
00:12:56.020 ago, I would have never been in this position where I'm growing with my children. I'm in a new,
00:13:01.080 beautiful relationship with a woman that I love and care about. Um, I never would have been in that
00:13:06.660 position if I decided to end my life. My kids need me. You guys listening to this podcast need me.
00:13:12.560 My mission is important. What I'm trying to accomplish is important. God put me on this earth
00:13:17.260 to do something. And I'm not putting my divorce on God, but it is part of the plan. He, he knows this
00:13:24.920 was going to happen. And what can I do moving forward? Don't end your life. I'm going to share some
00:13:29.900 dues with you here shortly. You don't need to end it. Please do not end it. Number, uh, let's see.
00:13:35.200 I'm on number five. Uh, do not seek vengeance. All right. I know you're mad at her. I know you're
00:13:41.740 frustrated with her. I know there's contention and animosity and vitriol. I know that because I have
00:13:48.640 that. Now I don't speak ill of my ex publicly because I've made the decision not to do that. And
00:13:55.200 she does not speak publicly ill about me, even though I'm sure she's got things in her mind that
00:14:01.200 she could speak ill of me about. I'm not out to get her. I'm not out to hurt her physically,
00:14:10.500 mentally, emotionally. She's the mother of my children. I want my children, my four kids
00:14:15.400 to have a good relationship with her. I think she's a good mother. I don't think she was a great
00:14:21.980 wife in those later years and months, but she's still a good person and she's taking care of our
00:14:31.220 children and our children need her in their lives. And fortunately mine hasn't been, my divorce hasn't
00:14:39.620 been real hostile. I know a lot of other guys that are going through hostile divorces and I get that.
00:14:44.120 I've seen it time and time again, but you don't need to seek vengeance. Let the dead bury the dead.
00:14:49.560 If she's going to act the way that she's going to act, you can just let her do that knowing that at
00:14:54.500 some point she's going to get hers. And it's not your place to administer justice. Your place
00:15:01.600 is to raise your kids. Your place is to take the higher ground. Your place is to continue to build
00:15:07.900 yourself and be a better man than you were before. That's what you are to do. And what she is to do
00:15:13.740 is her business, not yours. Leave her alone. Do not seek vengeance. Do not be petty. Do not try to
00:15:21.880 get back at her. Do not blast her publicly. Leave her alone. Let the dead bury the dead. Last one guys
00:15:28.960 do not. And this is a form of sedation watching pornography. A lot of you guys will engage in
00:15:35.000 porn because we're sexually driven as men. It is what it is. And so we'll engage in pornography or as I
00:15:41.720 said, point number three, we'll sleep around. Guys, that's not going to help you. It's fake.
00:15:48.720 It paints an unrealistic expectation of what sex and intimacy in the bedroom looks like.
00:15:54.460 It falsifies love. It tricks you into believing that you could have something that isn't natural
00:16:04.960 or isn't good or isn't healthy. And so we want to maintain a healthy level of respect for women,
00:16:10.880 even though we might in the moment feel like maybe they don't deserve our respect because you're
00:16:16.160 taking an isolated situation, your divorce or your separation, and applying it broadly. Don't do that.
00:16:22.940 Don't watch porn. Don't engage in sexual degeneracy. And you're going to be better off when you do.
00:16:28.560 Okay. So now let's move into the deuce. I talked about the do nots. There were six of them there.
00:16:34.480 Sedate, stalk, sleep around, kill yourself, seek vengeance, and watch porn. Let's talk about the
00:16:39.040 deuce. Number one, build male friendships. When I was early in my relationship, I actually, my marriage,
00:16:48.820 it was an 18 year marriage. We dated for several years and then we got married. So we were together
00:16:53.540 for about two decades and early in our marriage, even in dating, I forgot about my friends. I pushed
00:17:00.620 them aside. I didn't do anything with them. I didn't reach out to them. I didn't go on trips or
00:17:04.620 adventures or anything like that with them because I thought I was doing what I should be doing,
00:17:08.260 which is fully engaged with her. And I loved those early years. And I really enjoyed pouring fully
00:17:15.560 into her and the relationship. And, uh, that's what I thought I was, should be doing, but
00:17:21.640 I forgot about my friends. And in the moments of our separation, uh, about a year in, uh, no,
00:17:30.440 it wasn't a year. It was, it was several years into our marriage. We went through our separation
00:17:35.160 and I realized, Oh shit, I'm alone. I'm all alone. My friends are still there. They're still doing
00:17:42.000 things, but I forsaked them. I didn't spend time with them. I didn't reach out. I didn't connect.
00:17:47.020 And then when I went through into my divorce, I realized I'm alone again because I didn't build
00:17:52.240 those male friendships. So if you're not already building friendships with other men,
00:17:56.980 then you need to do that right now. If you, if you have friendships, reach out, rekindle, reconnect,
00:18:03.360 um, go on trips, go hunting. We're in fall right now. We're in hunting season, go hunting,
00:18:08.280 go on a hike, go on a walk, have a phone call. The more I talk with other men, the more edified
00:18:14.460 and uplifted I am, but that takes work on your part. So build those male friendships. Number two,
00:18:20.100 develop new skills. And when I say skills, specifically what I'm referring to is marketable
00:18:25.460 skills. Go get a promotion, go get a designation, go get a new degree, like whatever you can do to
00:18:32.880 build extra wealth in your life. And trust me, you're going to need it because when you're going
00:18:36.980 through your divorce, you're going to be financially challenged to varying degrees. Some
00:18:42.240 of you minimally, some of you think you're going to be buried financially and you might. Robin
00:18:48.600 Williams, when he was alive, he told a joke and he said that something along the lines of, he used
00:18:53.400 to call, um, the, the, the process, all the money, meaning she gets all the money, but they called
00:19:00.560 it alimony. But he basically said that it's, it's, it's emotional torment and ruin through financial
00:19:10.840 devastation. Guys, you're going to need to get your wits about you. You're going to need to build
00:19:15.220 wealth. You're going to need to pay off debt. You're going to probably assume some debt that
00:19:19.560 isn't entirely yours. You're going to give up a lot of the wealth that you spent years, if not decades
00:19:24.320 earning, it's going to happen. So you need to develop new skills that are marketable. Who do
00:19:29.900 you need to connect with? What conferences you do need to go to? What designations do you need to
00:19:34.460 secure, but build new skills that are going to help you make more money. And some of you might say,
00:19:40.280 well, I'm just going to give more to her. You know what? Yeah, probably depending on your decree,
00:19:46.740 but so what? Because when that ends, when your kids are out of the house and that alimony ends,
00:19:52.240 whether it's in three years, five years, 10 years, whatever, then you're going to be in a much
00:19:56.780 better place. You don't want to cut off your nose to spite your face, as they say. Number three,
00:20:04.500 learn a new hobby. Guys, your life is meant to be enjoyable, but most men don't have joy.
00:20:11.960 They're not hunting. They're not playing. They're not laughing. They're not joking. They're not
00:20:15.660 doing all the things that we used to do as young men, kids, where we'd have fun. I remember sledding
00:20:20.940 down, down a hill in a very small town in Southern Utah called Parolin. And I've got a scar to show
00:20:28.920 for the things that we did. And we used to get in trouble and we used to laugh and joke and chase
00:20:36.420 girls around and, um, you know, learn new thing. Like, these are the things that we used to do as
00:20:41.380 kids, but somewhere along the way, we were told you need to be more mature and you do because you
00:20:46.140 have more responsibility, but what about fun? What about joy? What about laughter? What about
00:20:55.120 excitement? What about risk? Do you have that in your life? Because if you don't, you're failing.
00:21:01.180 You really are. You know, I bought a, uh, a little Honda, 1981 Honda moped the other day.
00:21:07.280 It's a little moped. It goes like 20 miles an hour tops. And somebody had said, Oh, that's stupid.
00:21:12.060 You shouldn't have bought that. You know what? It makes me smile. I put my kids on there with me.
00:21:16.820 My youngest son, he's nine years old. Um, he loves to get on there with me and every night we'll go
00:21:21.920 ride the moped around. He puts his helmet on, sits right there in front of me. He wants to do it by
00:21:26.360 himself. He's not quite there yet, but he will be. It's fun. I don't care if it's stupid. I don't care
00:21:33.280 if it's silly. I don't care if it's laughable. I don't care if other people are looking at me and
00:21:37.000 saying, Oh, that's ridiculous. You know what? I want more of that in my life. I want more joy.
00:21:41.860 I want more laughter. I want more play. These are the things I want to do. You know, as a 44 year
00:21:48.520 old man, I don't want to take myself so seriously. And I don't think you should as well. What do you
00:21:53.460 want to learn? What do you wish you, you would have done that you never did earlier in the year,
00:21:58.020 or maybe even the beginning, the end of last year, I went skydiving for the first time.
00:22:01.880 I'll never do it again, but I did it. And jumping out of that plane, sitting on that platform above the
00:22:07.100 tire, thousands and thousands of feet in the air. And the guy said, you ready to go? And I said,
00:22:12.500 yeah, I want to do front flips. And he's like, what? I'm like, yeah, I want to do front flips
00:22:15.520 when I go. And so we did three front flips as I jumped off that plane. I'll never do it again,
00:22:20.420 but I did it. I want to take trips. I want to see new things. I want to talk to weird and interesting
00:22:27.580 people. I want to laugh. I want to play. I want to eat good food. Are you doing that?
00:22:31.960 Because if you're not, you have a permission slip. You're going through a divorce. You have
00:22:37.160 a permission slip to do whatever the hell you want. And as long as it's legal, moral, and ethical,
00:22:44.220 what I say is go for it. Go on that trip you wanted to go on. Do that dumb thing that she always
00:22:50.660 ridiculed you about. Take the guys out and go on a motorcycle ride across the country for 10 days.
00:22:58.200 The thing that she always said you couldn't do, or you shouldn't do, or laughed at you for doing,
00:23:01.940 do that and go live your life. Number four, train your body. Okay. Your body is a, is a tool. It's a
00:23:10.520 weapon. It's an incredible, incredible piece of biological machinery. And there's too many of us
00:23:18.700 who are fat. We're overweight. We're out of shape. We're lazy. We're pathetic. We're weak. We're soft.
00:23:25.760 What would it be like if you were 15% body fat? What would it be like if you added an extra 20,
00:23:36.520 30, 40, 50, 80 pounds to your bench press or deadlift? What would it be like to be this chiseled
00:23:43.380 specimen of a human being? What would it be like if you didn't go eat all the junk food and instead
00:23:50.100 you decided to eat the best foods for you, how much energy would you have to go do those weird
00:23:56.180 things you've always wanted to do or jump on the trampoline with your kids or have a pillow fight
00:24:01.120 or kick somebody's ass in jujitsu? If you were in shape, if you trained your body and you fueled it
00:24:09.780 correctly, do that. We all know we need to do it. So do it. And then the last one here, point number five,
00:24:14.860 guys, give back, give back. Likely, if you're in a divorce right now, you're wallowing in your own
00:24:22.900 self-pity. You're feeling bad about who you are and what you've done and all the mistakes you've
00:24:28.680 made and why she's leaving you and how pathetic you are. And some of that might be valid, but you
00:24:35.080 know what? The more that you can give back, and that's what I'm doing here in this podcast. And that's
00:24:40.260 why this podcast has been so valuable for me. When I was in the throes of my divorce, I had people
00:24:44.660 reach out and say, you know what, Ryan, you need to shut this down and you need to go by yourself
00:24:51.120 and just figure yourself out for several months or a year or whatever. No, screw that. You know why?
00:24:57.440 Because I believe in what we're doing. The only people who would ever say, I'll just go like,
00:25:03.620 get lost and don't do this are the people who don't believe in what they're doing, but they're
00:25:07.600 not going to project that on me. I believe in what I'm doing. I believe that what we are doing
00:25:14.540 here is valuable for other people. I believe that we have information to share. I believe
00:25:21.460 that we can make other men's lives better. And when I pour into other men authentically,
00:25:29.180 genuinely, honestly, I'm better because of it. It's a win-win. I don't get to wallow in my own
00:25:37.940 self-pity. I don't get to cry about how hard my life is because I hear every day from other men who
00:25:43.940 have it infinitely harder than me. Give back, go donate to a charity, go run a youth sports team
00:25:54.280 for one of your children, go to the food bank and hand out food. Or if you're in a financial position,
00:26:03.140 make donations, like give back, tell other people what you know, share your insight, share
00:26:09.580 whatever you can to make their life better. So they don't have to go through the same bull crap
00:26:13.800 that you have in your life. When you give back, we start to forget our own problems and move into
00:26:19.200 solution oriented opportunities. I know it's heavy right now, guys. I really do. I know from experience,
00:26:28.020 I'm not coming to you and talking with you about these things from a place of ignorance. I know
00:26:35.440 exactly what it's like for the woman that you love to say, she doesn't love you and she doesn't want
00:26:42.620 anything to do with you. And she doesn't want to be married to you anymore. And all these dreams that
00:26:48.340 you had about a lifelong marriage and raising your kids and unison together are now crumbling. Part of
00:26:54.800 that your own fault and part of that not. But you can be better. You can improve. You can make
00:27:03.140 yourself into a more capable man. And that's what I want for you. So I'm going to share one other
00:27:11.100 resource. We just came out with a program called Divorce Not Death. Divorce Not Death because it feels
00:27:17.520 like death. Mental, emotional, spiritual, maybe even physical. It feels like you're going to die.
00:27:24.020 You're not. You're going to get through it. And I want to help you get through it better.
00:27:30.080 So if you go to DivorceNotDeath.com, I just did a preview call last night. If you go to
00:27:38.600 DivorceNotDeath.com, you'll have access to that preview call as a replay and you'll see what we're
00:27:43.600 doing. This is something I could probably charge thousands and thousands of dollars for because
00:27:49.500 you're hurting right now. And so you'll pay whatever you can pay in order to do it. I'm not doing that.
00:27:54.020 I'm making this very accessible for you guys. There's costs associated with running a business
00:28:02.000 and putting these resources together. And I need to make sure those costs are covered. But I'm not
00:28:06.400 going to extort you. I'm not going to charge you thousands and thousands of dollars and prey on what
00:28:11.560 you're dealing with right now. I want you to get the help you need because it's the help that I wish
00:28:15.780 I would have had three years ago when I was going through my situation. So go to DivorceNotDeath.com.
00:28:22.620 Again, I know this podcast is probably a little different than what you're used to, but this is
00:28:27.160 real. This is real. If you've never gone through a divorce, you might not understand it. But if you
00:28:33.160 have, or maybe even when you were a young man and you watched your mom and dad go through a divorce,
00:28:37.680 you know how painful it is. And I'm going to give you the tools that I can to help you overcome it.
00:28:42.480 So go to DivorceNotDeath.com. Check it out. If you have questions, email me personally. I don't
00:28:47.640 have an assistant. Maybe I should. People tell me I should. I don't have one. Just email me,
00:28:53.600 Ryan at OrderOfMan.com or send me a message on Instagram, which is where I'm most active at
00:29:00.360 Ryan Michler. And we'll help you get what you need. But you can overcome this. I believe you can.
00:29:07.180 I have. And you can too. All right, guys. We'll be back next week for an interview.
00:29:11.240 Until then, go out there, take action, check out DivorceNotDeath.com and become the man you are
00:29:17.680 meant to be. Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast. If you're ready to take charge of
00:29:23.060 your life and be more of the man you were meant to be, we invite you to join the order at OrderOfMan.com.
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