Order of Man

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path.

00:00:05.980 When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.

00:00:10.400 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong.

00:00:15.380 This is your life. This is who you are. This is who you will become.

00:00:19.600 At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call yourself a man.

00:00:24.820 Hey, what's up, Kip? Good to see you, man. Back from another Ask Me Anything. I'm looking forward to this one.

00:00:28.520 Yeah, I forgot to open my go before we got started, so just open it, crack it right now.

00:00:37.980 That's for Littlefield.

00:00:39.900 That didn't sound very good. You should have done one of the microphone.

00:00:42.540 Did it not sound good?

00:00:43.420 You're like, that sounded like a non-tap to an arm bar is what that sounded like.

00:00:48.400 It sounded like a Red Bull, not like a go.

00:00:51.540 Oh.

00:00:52.980 I can't see what flavor you got there.

00:00:55.960 I'm working the mango.

00:00:58.520 Mango is good. I like Sour Apple Sniper and the Orange Afterburner. Those are my two favorite.

00:01:05.620 Do you like the Pink Lemonade?

00:01:08.200 Yeah. I like them all. Those are just my go-tos.

00:01:12.440 Yeah.

00:01:12.880 What was the one that we don't get it here at the office, so I forgot what the flavor was, but it was like a tea.

00:01:22.560 They had it there at the working camp.

00:01:25.320 It was, yeah, it's the, I don't know if they called it the Jocko Palmer.

00:01:29.580 I can't remember, but.

00:01:30.620 That's right.

00:01:31.120 It's the tea and lemonade is what it is.

00:01:33.300 Yeah.

00:01:33.580 Yeah, that was good, too, which was surprising.

00:01:36.540 Yeah.

00:01:36.840 Yeah, that was good.

00:01:38.440 Yeah.

00:01:38.640 Well, good, brother.

00:01:40.240 Well, like I said, I'm looking forward to getting into some questions today.

00:01:42.560 Guys, if you don't know what we're about, today is where we field your questions from, I think we're going to start with the Iron Council, which is our brotherhood.

00:01:49.100 That opens up in 10 days, probably eight or nine as of the release of this episode.

00:01:55.300 Yeah.

00:01:55.520 And then we're also going to field some.

00:01:57.340 Go ahead.

00:01:57.700 No, you got it.

00:01:58.600 I was just going to say to learn more about the Iron Council.

00:02:01.040 Let me back up.

00:02:01.540 Yeah, come on. 0.77

00:02:02.220 You're taking over my job here.

00:02:04.040 This is my job.

00:02:05.160 Sorry.

00:02:05.600 Here you go.

00:02:06.500 Go ahead.

00:02:06.660 To learn more about the Iron Council, go to orderofman.com slash iron council.

00:02:09.940 Yeah, eight days.

00:02:11.460 And that gets you in to kind of get rolling Jan 1.

00:02:15.780 So don't think that like, oh, I'm not ready in December.

00:02:18.420 I'll start in January.

00:02:19.340 No, no, no.

00:02:19.720 If you're starting in January, you start.

00:02:21.860 Well, you should be starting now, but absolutely join the Iron Council when we open up for enrollment on the 15th of December.

00:02:28.940 You know what we should do?

00:02:29.600 I was thinking about it as you were saying that next year, we're a little late for this year, but next year we should do 12 days to Iron Council instead of the 12 days to Christmas.

00:02:39.180 I don't know.

00:02:40.080 We could do some giveaways or get guys geared up and prepped and ready to go.

00:02:43.580 So when they hit the Iron Council, they hit the ground running.

00:02:46.660 Yeah, like the 12 principles required to win in life.

00:02:50.720 And we count down.

00:02:51.440 Yeah, something like that.

00:02:52.340 Yeah, leading up to it.

00:02:53.700 Yeah.

00:02:53.840 All right.

00:02:54.140 Let's remember.

00:02:54.840 Let's mark that one for next year.

00:02:56.540 Christmas theme.

00:02:57.300 All right.

00:02:57.640 A-R that document somewhere.

00:02:59.920 We're good to go.

00:03:00.400 That's right.

00:03:01.300 All right, man.

00:03:01.740 Well, let's just jump right into questions then and start getting after it.

00:03:04.940 Excellent.

00:03:05.440 All right.

00:03:05.760 Clayton Biden, how often do you wrestle with God?

00:03:08.940 And what challenges have you faced when submitting to his will?

00:03:13.640 First of all, I see Clayton's name come up all the time.

00:03:17.300 And I just I feel bad for his last name.

00:03:19.440 Like, I don't know his politics, but I can't.

00:03:21.840 I just can't imagine.

00:03:23.260 I'm not even going to make fun of it because I'm sure he's like, oh, that's new.

00:03:26.160 Like, I haven't heard that one before.

00:03:28.020 I just, man, rough luck.

00:03:31.340 Rough go at it on that one.

00:03:33.040 Totally.

00:03:33.460 All right.

00:03:33.740 That's when Napoleon Dynamite came out and the brothers called Kip.

00:03:38.680 That was that was my moment.

00:03:39.860 Really, out of all the characters, I got the cage fighter guy that wants to be training

00:03:45.680 to be a cage fighter that loves technology.

00:03:48.020 No coincidence whatsoever.

00:03:49.780 Sounds about right.

00:03:50.920 Has about the same build as you, too.

00:03:52.620 So sounds about right.

00:03:54.860 How often do I wrestle with God?

00:04:00.820 Is it is that what it is?

00:04:02.040 Yeah.

00:04:02.400 How often do you wrestle with God and what challenges have you faced when submitting to

00:04:07.120 his will?

00:04:07.620 So when you're doing what you feel is in line with God and challenges that come with that

00:04:12.000 or even just wrestling with with that.

00:04:15.720 Yeah, I look, I'm not perfect at this by any means, but one thing I do try to do is even

00:04:20.000 in the rough moments, I try to look at the opportunities that will present themselves and how I will

00:04:25.360 be better because of the situation.

00:04:27.080 A great example of that.

00:04:29.280 It sounds weird to say it like that.

00:04:30.980 I was it's not a great example, but it's an example.

00:04:34.320 And that's the divorce.

00:04:35.920 You know, I when when that whole thing went down, I thought it was the end of the world

00:04:42.120 and life was going to be miserable for the rest of my life.

00:04:44.800 And it really hasn't been that long.

00:04:46.120 And life's actually pretty good.

00:04:47.780 And that's not to say that I don't have bad days or there aren't challenges that come with

00:04:52.040 being a single father and co-parenting our children or even just our our personal

00:04:57.100 communication.

00:04:57.640 There are rough spots and challenges with that.

00:05:01.340 But I'm in a really good spot right now, physically, mentally, emotionally.

00:05:05.580 Uh, the relationship I have with my kids is stronger than it's possibly ever been, even

00:05:13.600 though I only see them half of the time.

00:05:15.860 I'm learning.

00:05:16.860 I've learned new skills that have needed to be learned because of the circumstances.

00:05:22.120 Cooking is one, you know, you guys have heard me for years how bad I hate it.

00:05:25.940 I don't love it, but I don't hate it anymore.

00:05:29.860 So, you know, there's things like that.

00:05:32.140 There's, there's, there's positives and there's benefits that come with every rough and negative

00:05:37.980 circumstance.

00:05:39.160 And one thing I have to be aware of personally is I will take the credit.

00:05:45.380 If I, if I, by default, if, if my, not, not from somebody else, that's not what I'm saying,

00:05:50.940 but if my life gets better or it improves or, you know, I have my health just because I did

00:05:55.940 it and sure.

00:05:58.180 Yeah.

00:05:58.700 There are things that I have done that have made my circumstances better, but everything

00:06:05.900 that I have, I have to remind myself comes from God and that all the blessings and even

00:06:12.000 the challenges come from him.

00:06:13.920 And that even those challenges, you can, he he's working in your favor.

00:06:18.760 He's working on your behalf.

00:06:20.280 He wants you to take those challenges and make yourself better, make yourself a more

00:06:24.420 well-rounded man, a better father, a better husband, a better leader in your community,

00:06:29.440 a better neighbor, just a better human being in general.

00:06:32.420 So I don't, I don't ever wrestle with the concept of God.

00:06:35.460 I do wrestle with the concept of religion.

00:06:39.160 I know it's important.

00:06:40.520 I believe it's important.

00:06:41.800 I try to make it to church.

00:06:44.220 I was going to say as often as I can, that's not entirely true either, but I do try to make

00:06:47.860 it to church.

00:06:48.460 Uh, there's value in religion that I think a lot of people overlook because they're so

00:06:54.060 jaded by religion or a religious experience.

00:06:57.640 I I've never had that personally, but I believe in fellowship.

00:07:01.700 I believe in the ritualized processes of, of religion.

00:07:05.400 I believe that it's an opportunity for you to remember your covenant with God, to remember,

00:07:11.600 uh, the conversations, to have a structured environment, to be able to learn and grow from

00:07:17.820 a spiritual perspective.

00:07:19.240 So I do see the value in religion.

00:07:21.160 Uh, but I do wrestle with the idea that it's just this one thing, this one religion, this

00:07:27.680 one set of principles we talked about this last week that has to be adhered to.

00:07:31.460 And if not, you're going to meet your creator when you die.

00:07:34.620 And he's going to say, Nope, you didn't do that.

00:07:36.440 That one thing based on what I know of him and our relationship.

00:07:40.900 I don't see it like that.

00:07:42.640 Totally.

00:07:43.240 I see that.

00:07:44.060 I see that.

00:07:44.760 You know, when I read this question from Clayton, I'm like, part of me is like, what do you mean?

00:07:51.060 Like wrestle all the time, like, like everything, every moment I have between choosing with right

00:07:59.680 and wrong is a wrestle with, I, in my opinion, God's will, and I'm not perfect.

00:08:05.600 So all the time I'm wrestling all the time.

00:08:09.220 I'm, you know, not showing up as a father, as good as I should, I, I lose my temper.

00:08:16.080 I'm not being as lovable.

00:08:17.440 I'm not reaching out to the neighbor across the street that I've gotten in my gut telling

00:08:22.960 me I should go over there and let them know I'm thinking about them or the text message

00:08:27.700 that I, I didn't send to the person that crossed my mind earlier today.

00:08:31.720 Like there are so many wrestles, if you want to use that term that I have.

00:08:38.340 And, and I do think they're wrestling with his will because his will is what for me to

00:08:42.920 do the right thing, to, to be in integrity and to put other people before myself and the

00:08:49.080 opportunities for me to, whether it's date credit or be selfish with my time, uh, and

00:08:55.960 lose sight of a greater intent in regards to what we're doing and, and get my pride.

00:09:01.720 I'd involved absolutely all the time.

00:09:04.980 And, and I think, and I don't, because we're not perfect.

00:09:08.860 I don't know if that's wrong.

00:09:10.180 I think maybe I should focus on reducing the amount of times I'm wrestling with those things,

00:09:17.400 but I think there's also value in knowing that I'm willing to go to the mat and wrestle and,

00:09:23.840 and that at least I'm fighting for that.

00:09:26.260 Uh, and I'm not willing to give up and just say, you know, it is what it is and take credit

00:09:31.740 and not give it where it belongs.

00:09:34.020 I will say also to your point that wrestling with God's will is the natural state of man.

00:09:41.540 So there's nothing wrong with you.

00:09:45.620 There's, there's nothing broken in you.

00:09:48.100 You aren't thinking or doing anything that any other human being on the planet doesn't do or think

00:09:54.060 it's the natural state.

00:09:56.020 We are fallen.

00:09:56.880 So the natural state is for you to wrestle with that.

00:09:59.960 And I think if you acknowledge it and every day you work to win that, win that match,

00:10:05.080 if you will, then that's what he would have us do.

00:10:08.300 Yeah.

00:10:09.240 And this is why I think it's so critical that we keep wrestling because when you stop fighting,

00:10:17.540 what are you accepting that my success is my success.

00:10:21.740 And the reason why I'm doing this is to prop myself up.

00:10:24.420 And it's not about other people.

00:10:25.880 And I stopped, stopped reaching out to others and putting, you know, my children first before

00:10:30.580 my, like, that's the default when we're not willing to fight.

00:10:35.040 And that's the importance of keeping the fight and staying on the path of fighting.

00:10:40.760 Yeah.

00:10:41.320 Yeah.

00:10:42.420 Okay.

00:10:43.000 What's next?

00:10:44.180 Rick, uh, Blalock in the spirit of this month's topic.

00:10:48.820 I'd love to hear your thoughts on the goal of counting calories versus eating clean, avoiding

00:10:54.080 processed sugars and et cetera.

00:10:55.580 These guys are going to hold your feet to the fire, by the way.

00:10:59.140 Do you value one method over the other when it comes to weight loss?

00:11:03.060 So this week we're talking about the topic of the month inside of our brotherhood, the

00:11:08.140 iron council is eat to live.

00:11:09.500 I said this week, this month, eat to live.

00:11:11.880 And we did it in the month of December by design, because this is probably the hardest

00:11:17.480 time to do it.

00:11:18.620 Yeah.

00:11:18.920 It's probably the hardest month to eat clean.

00:11:21.000 Cause you know, my neighbor, she's, she's a great woman. 0.63

00:11:23.980 She brought up some bread the other day, some banana nut bread.

00:11:26.500 I want it so bad.

00:11:27.600 And it's sitting there.

00:11:28.520 My son eats it in front of me and just, just lives it up.

00:11:32.060 And I want it so bad, but I don't, but you have people and cookies and neighbor brought

00:11:35.900 cookies, homemade chocolate chip cookies the other day.

00:11:38.020 I wanted to eat them so bad, but I didn't.

00:11:40.120 So this is the hardest time.

00:11:41.420 So the question was counting calories versus eating clean.

00:11:44.780 I think you can do both.

00:11:47.560 Personally, I don't count calories.

00:11:50.000 Well, it's not entirely true.

00:11:52.260 I don't really worry too much about calories.

00:11:55.280 I worry more about eating clean and portion sizes and, and, and I know what's overeating

00:12:01.460 and I know what isn't.

00:12:02.460 For example, with meat, I could, I could eat, you know, 12 to 15 ounces of meat and I'll

00:12:08.580 be full and that's fine.

00:12:10.460 Like, and if I eat that and half a cup of vegetables, I could just do that for a month and be fine.

00:12:17.120 Maybe add some sugars in there. 0.80

00:12:19.740 You know, I, I try to reduce the carbs.

00:12:21.820 Not that I don't have any, but I'll eat chips.

00:12:24.280 I'll eat breads.

00:12:25.240 I'll eat crackers.

00:12:26.920 That's where, that's where it gets me.

00:12:28.660 So I just eliminate that.

00:12:30.740 Um, starches, rice.

00:12:33.180 Uh, I don't, I don't like people like sweet, but I don't like sweet potatoes.

00:12:36.520 I think they taste disgusting, but I eat a lot of rice, like couscous, stuff like that

00:12:41.000 for the starches. 0.52

00:12:41.880 Um, yes, I don't, I don't know.

00:12:45.140 I'm not, I'm not as dialed in my approach because I know if I'm just doing the right

00:12:49.120 thing, which is control portion sizes, intermittent fasting for me, uh, and then eating the right

00:12:56.520 things, then the calorie stuff doesn't seem to be as big of an issue.

00:12:59.620 Plus I'm training a lot lately as well, which gives me another three to 500 calories that

00:13:04.400 I could potentially eat if I chose to.

00:13:07.120 I don't, I don't alter my diet just because I'm working out or training or doing something

00:13:10.660 like that.

00:13:11.600 Yeah.

00:13:12.080 Uh, so in the past seven days, um, I I'd have to look at the numbers, but I am down over

00:13:16.540 four pounds in the past seven days, which is good for me because I don't have a ton to

00:13:20.940 lose.

00:13:21.160 I could lose probably another eight to 12, I would say is probably ideal, but for me,

00:13:26.640 it's just building muscle.

00:13:27.680 And that's why protein is big on the big on the list right now for me.

00:13:31.840 Yeah.

00:13:32.660 That's what I do.

00:13:33.640 I know Rick's act asking the specifics here, but I can't help, but think guys are listening

00:13:38.600 and want to jump on this train and, and, and I'm projecting a little bit cause I see this

00:13:43.280 or I hear this all the time where guys like get this crazy diet when reality, like probably

00:13:49.800 what they should be doing is just stop drinking soda.

00:13:52.060 Right.

00:13:52.500 So like, yeah, figure out where you are.

00:13:54.980 That's what Ryan's doing, but figure out the low hanging fruit and address the, the, the

00:13:59.980 issue.

00:14:00.500 You don't have to like be in, you know, yams and chicken, you know, when you're down in

00:14:07.180 sodas, you know, three days, three times a day currently right now, like just stop doing

00:14:12.080 that and stop eating the sweets.

00:14:14.100 Right.

00:14:14.460 And so, and a lot of guys count calories.

00:14:16.500 Why?

00:14:16.680 Because to be honest, I'm ignorant to it. 0.98

00:14:18.940 When, when I start tracking my calorie intake, I'm usually shocked, like, holy crap.

00:14:24.980 Like there's that many carbs in that, like, you know, and then it changes my perspective 0.58

00:14:30.620 in regards to what I should be eating because I'm so ignorant to the, the micronutrients

00:14:35.540 and so many different things.

00:14:36.500 And so that that's one benefit of counting is just so you understand what you're actually

00:14:41.100 putting into your body.

00:14:42.620 The other day, my son and I went to the gym and I, I, when I, I turned my watch on, I had

00:14:48.660 my programs and all that.

00:14:49.700 And I burned a little over 300 calories at the gym and I got thinking, I was like, Oh,

00:14:54.580 let's go over to the convenience store.

00:14:55.740 And sometimes I like to get, uh, uh, almond Snickers is my go-to suite of choice.

00:15:02.400 If I'm at a gas station and I was thinking about it the other day, I'm like, man, I just 0.99

00:15:06.440 spent an hour busting my ass. 0.99

00:15:08.500 I burn a little over 300 calories. 1.00

00:15:10.220 You're, I think you're over 400 calories if you get the king size on a Snickers.

00:15:14.620 Yeah. 0.99

00:15:15.620 So I worked out for an hour, bust my ass, take an hour out of my day. 0.99

00:15:18.980 Like, not that it was all bad. 0.99

00:15:20.220 I enjoyed being at the gym and working out, but what three minutes.

00:15:24.920 And I just, just negated everything that I just did right there.

00:15:28.920 That's crazy.

00:15:30.280 Well, I always, I love to translate.

00:15:32.600 I started doing this with, with my wife, but I have her translate like snacks to running. 1.00

00:15:38.100 Oh yeah.

00:15:38.840 And, and all the motivation started showing up.

00:15:41.880 I'm like, this cookie, how long is this?

00:15:44.280 She's like, that's about eight miles. 0.96

00:15:46.100 I'm like, screw that.

00:15:47.420 I don't want the cookie.

00:15:48.700 Like I would not run eight miles for that cookie.

00:15:52.500 And so you started doing that.

00:15:54.180 Like you don't eat anything.

00:15:55.680 Cause like, if you have to run for it, that's not where I do like, uh, I do actually track

00:16:02.340 my calories in a roundabout way.

00:16:04.760 Um, I document my food and it's an app that I use called, uh, and Johnny Loretty has me

00:16:10.800 set up on this so he can view it too, but it's my fitness pal.

00:16:13.880 Yeah.

00:16:14.280 Yeah.

00:16:14.620 So I go in there and I put all of my water.

00:16:16.340 I put all of my food.

00:16:17.540 Every time I eat everything, I just go ahead and throw right in there.

00:16:20.200 And it's not a perfect science.

00:16:21.420 I don't weigh my food.

00:16:22.920 I don't, but you know, I have a pretty good idea of the portion size and I throw it in there.

00:16:28.740 I don't usually go in and look and say, okay, I got to hit, you know, 2000 or 2,500 calories.

00:16:33.280 I don't, but it is an added little level of accountability where I know I'm going to have

00:16:37.620 to put it in there and I know Johnny's going to look at it and I know I'm going to see it.

00:16:42.780 So I want that thing to look as clean as possible.

00:16:45.460 Yeah, absolutely.

00:16:46.740 The value of tracking, right?

00:16:48.400 Yeah, exactly.

00:16:49.340 Yep.

00:16:50.100 Okay.

00:16:50.680 Bryce Beattie.

00:16:53.360 I'm a relatively stubborn individual when it comes to my learning style.

00:16:57.220 That's not to say that I'm not open to hearing about and understanding how others learn or

00:17:02.080 trying to apply knowledge passed on from others, but more than lessons learned from experience.

00:17:06.960 However, painful and regretful carry more learning power than those delivered through a verbal

00:17:12.220 or written forum.

00:17:13.460 What tips do you have for taking written and verbal advice that makes sense intellectually

00:17:18.340 and rationally, but may not a hundred percent resonate with you emotionally and then transcribing

00:17:24.440 that into language that lights the fire underneath you.

00:17:28.240 I'm, I'm emotionally charged by results.

00:17:31.960 Yeah.

00:17:32.820 I'm not emotionally charged by tracking my calories.

00:17:37.120 If we're going to use that example, but I am emotionally charged by looking in the mirror

00:17:43.660 in the morning and saying, man, I can see that pound you lost.

00:17:47.760 Or my son the other day, uh, I throw it, taking my shirt off and I threw it in the, in the,

00:17:52.960 uh, washing machine.

00:17:55.260 And he's like, dad, you look good.

00:17:56.880 He's like, I can see you've already lost weight.

00:17:59.540 That's a little, that to me is more motivating than going on the fitness pal app and saying,

00:18:04.520 Hey, you did a good job.

00:18:05.360 You tracked that meal or whatever.

00:18:07.640 Totally.

00:18:08.380 So I, and of course, negative circumstances are even more emotionally charged when something

00:18:13.580 goes horribly wrong.

00:18:15.200 That's even emotion, more emotionally charged.

00:18:18.180 So I, I, I mean, the, the premise of the question is, is, are you being stubborn just

00:18:24.480 for the sake of being stubborn?

00:18:25.840 You say you have this stubborn learning style.

00:18:28.060 Um, and I wonder, and I only asked this because I know I am sometimes I'm hardheaded, you know,

00:18:32.600 Kip, you might tell me, Hey, here's a good way to do it.

00:18:34.940 And naturally I'm like, well, I want to figure it out on my own.

00:18:38.460 Totally.

00:18:38.860 Same thing we would do as a six year old little boy.

00:18:41.080 Who's like, no, I want to tie my shoes on my own.

00:18:43.120 And you got to spend an hour of watching him tie his shoes.

00:18:45.320 It's like, let me show you.

00:18:46.200 No, I want to get it.

00:18:46.840 I want to get it.

00:18:48.060 We do the same thing as grown men.

00:18:49.780 And sometimes it's our own ego that gets in the way.

00:18:52.840 And maybe the switch here is how do I let go of my ego and how do I turn to, and here's

00:18:59.020 a bit of advice, turn to qualified professionals who are achieving the results that I desire

00:19:03.320 in my life and trust them and be humble and ask good questions and try things in a way

00:19:11.020 that you've never tried before.

00:19:12.180 We have guys who come into the iron council and they'll do 90% of what we ask them to

00:19:16.480 do.

00:19:17.100 And the other 10, they're like, no, I don't want to do that.

00:19:19.000 I don't, uh, that's not for me.

00:19:21.540 It might not be for you, but that's why you're producing the results that you're producing

00:19:25.960 in your life.

00:19:27.220 So are you satisfied with where you are?

00:19:28.820 No.

00:19:29.060 Then do the extra 10%, do it for 30 days.

00:19:32.380 I know it works because when I do it, it works.

00:19:34.260 When you do it, it works.

00:19:35.120 When thousands and thousands of other men have done it, it works.

00:19:38.400 So do it that way for 30 days and then be emotionally charged by the results that you

00:19:43.700 will inevitably see in your life.

00:19:45.860 So I understand when somebody tells you like, Hey, you should do it this way.

00:19:50.360 It's not fun.

00:19:52.380 It's, but it's not supposed to be fun.

00:19:54.520 That's why we do the battle plan the way that we do it.

00:19:57.500 We look at our object first.

00:19:58.800 We look at our vision, which is emotionally charged work into our objectives, which are

00:20:04.240 more metric based.

00:20:06.000 Like I want to lose this much weight, for example.

00:20:08.780 And then we move into our daily tasks, things that we can do on a daily basis that will produce

00:20:15.480 the objective that will fulfill the vision.

00:20:18.400 We do it that way for a reason.

00:20:20.540 And this is scientifically proven to work.

00:20:22.820 And if you do it that way, then you're not really worried about, Oh man, I got to do

00:20:28.900 this thing I don't want to do today. 0.99

00:20:30.460 And this kind of sucks. 0.94

00:20:31.540 And I want to learn the hard way. 0.95

00:20:32.780 No, you just know that this is part of what needs to be done in order to achieve your emotionally

00:20:37.720 charged vision for yourself.

00:20:39.500 What would you add, Kip?

00:20:41.180 Well, the only thing I'd add, you know, Bryce is kind of like why I'm kind of stubborn this

00:20:44.820 way, I want to clarify 70% of people learn through experience, 20% learn through discussion

00:20:53.100 or informal, right?

00:20:55.420 Discussions and only 10% learn from like verbal written lecture.

00:21:00.900 So you're normal on the job training.

00:21:03.540 That, that is, that is how most people learn.

00:21:05.960 Now, where I get, I, where I hear him, he's getting hooked up is maybe he listens to something

00:21:09.760 that Ryan says, goes, Oh, that's interesting, but he doesn't apply it to the actual on the

00:21:15.020 job, right?

00:21:15.940 Cause he's unwillingness to go, Oh, well, it didn't motivate.

00:21:18.460 It didn't connect in a way that transforms me.

00:21:20.460 Guess what?

00:21:21.080 Most things don't transform you.

00:21:23.040 Absolutely not until you actually take action.

00:21:26.120 So the question is, is how do I hear something and then move it to application so I can act on

00:21:32.500 it?

00:21:32.720 And for me, I think, and I'm, we've talked about this in the past, but I'm, I'm kind of the

00:21:37.520 stick kind of guy, right?

00:21:38.820 You're like, Oh, I heard Johnny mentioned something about my health and, and what I should

00:21:44.320 do, but you know what?

00:21:45.440 Like, it sounds great.

00:21:46.700 Logically makes sense, but applying it, man, it just doesn't connect.

00:21:50.620 We'll get connected to the impact.

00:21:52.420 If you don't, that, that, that is how I operate.

00:21:56.460 And, and, and trust me, it's deeper than the little lane stuff.

00:21:59.820 Like, and I'll, I'll use fitness as an example, cause it's an extreme one.

00:22:04.260 Often we'll look at fitness.

00:22:05.840 Let's say I'm overweight and we'll go, well, Kip, get present to the impact.

00:22:10.420 Oh, well, the impact is that I don't look sexy with my shirt off.

00:22:13.840 And the impact is I might die, you know, few years, you know, earlier than I would if I

00:22:20.180 was healthy and, and I get there.

00:22:22.200 That's, that's kind of like blue belt level impact. 0.55

00:22:26.000 Black belt level impact is the bad habits that your kids pick up. 1.00

00:22:29.920 And they have low self-esteem because of your lazy ass that's black belt impact. 1.00

00:22:35.880 And so I would suggest if there's, and if it's valuable to us, trust me, their impacts 0.99

00:22:40.900 there.

00:22:41.640 So what's left on the table by you not showing up powerfully, get present to that because

00:22:48.200 that's where your regret is going to come from when we go later on our lives.

00:22:52.860 And we realized that we didn't show up powerfully and serve and benefit those in our lives because

00:22:57.260 we were unmotivated or not disciplined enough to actually show up powerfully in our own lives.

00:23:03.840 It's awesome.

00:23:04.980 I mean, that's, yeah.

00:23:07.160 The only thing is you were saying that I would add, cause you had talked about, oh, not everything's

00:23:11.360 going to motivate you.

00:23:12.160 Just find something that does.

00:23:13.860 Yeah.

00:23:14.460 Figure it out.

00:23:15.300 Like we, we talk about this and I think there's this, this concept around should, and I even

00:23:20.640 say that like a man should X, Y, and Z.

00:23:23.020 Yeah, that's true.

00:23:23.660 And there are things that I believe a man should be a protector, provider, presider.

00:23:28.140 There's certain, a man should be working out and exercising his body.

00:23:31.240 A man should be, there are certain things that I think are universally true that I, I don't 1.00

00:23:35.200 really feel like we need to even rationalize or justify.

00:23:39.080 It's just, it is a man should be fit and strong.

00:23:42.360 Of course, who's going to argue with me on it?

00:23:44.600 Well, there will be, but it's, it's, it's just insane to think anything else.

00:23:48.840 But then there's other things that a man should do jujitsu.

00:23:53.500 No, I don't think so.

00:23:56.540 Should he be trained?

00:23:57.800 Should he be physically capable of taking care of himself, of protecting himself, of, of,

00:24:02.620 of fighting?

00:24:03.460 Yeah.

00:24:04.700 So maybe jujitsu is not your thing.

00:24:06.400 Maybe Muay Thai is maybe some sort of other striking, maybe wrestling, maybe boxing.

00:24:09.940 I don't know, whatever, but there's a thousand different ways to go about doing that.

00:24:13.460 It's the same thing with job.

00:24:15.980 People sometimes will say this about occupation.

00:24:18.840 Well, it doesn't, you know, it doesn't feel like I'm a man. 0.99

00:24:20.880 Well, I never went to a little, any occupation and saw a little pair of testicles on a job 0.99

00:24:24.720 description. 0.98

00:24:26.280 Like if you want to dance and that's one, if you want to dance and you can make a living

00:24:31.080 dancing and you're a man, I don't care. 0.98

00:24:34.060 That doesn't make you less manly.

00:24:35.660 It makes you more manly because you're actually fulfilling a responsibility or requirement

00:24:39.620 or a job doing something you love and you're fulfilling and meeting your obligations.

00:24:44.820 That's the requirement, not what exactly you do.

00:24:47.900 So there's an infinite number of ways to do it.

00:24:49.580 There's also an infinite number of people to listen to.

00:24:52.000 If you listen to me, I had a guy on one of our YouTube videos yesterday, put a comment.

00:24:55.920 And he's like, you're the cadence of your voice is annoying. 0.99

00:24:59.480 This sucks. 0.99

00:25:02.040 And normally I'd be brutal, man. 0.99

00:25:04.180 It's, it's not though.

00:25:05.880 It's just people who are upset or whatever.

00:25:08.740 That's true.

00:25:09.920 But you three, four years ago, I would have been upset or maybe made another comment back

00:25:15.800 or something to some robot or some 11 year old punk kid.

00:25:18.400 Who's just messing with people, you know?

00:25:21.180 And yesterday I was like, I didn't even say anything, but in my mind, I was like, then

00:25:25.300 find somebody else.

00:25:26.760 Like, you don't have to listen to me.

00:25:29.620 And, and we do, if, if you like Jordan Peterson, listen to Jordan Peterson.

00:25:32.980 If he bugs you, listen to Jocko.

00:25:34.220 If he bugs you, listen to Andy Fusilla.

00:25:37.040 If he bugs you, listen.

00:25:38.940 I've had 450 guys on, listen to somebody who inspires you.

00:25:43.200 And then like you said, inspires you to translate to action.

00:25:47.620 Yeah, totally.

00:25:48.660 Well, and, and that's, think about the, I was thinking about this the other day, because

00:25:52.780 I had a conversation with an employee around what causes greatness in people.

00:25:58.400 And we have many examples where we could look at individuals that had really traumatic childhoods,

00:26:05.360 right?

00:26:05.640 And they, they rose above and, and it played a part in their greatness.

00:26:10.640 And I think it played a part in their greatness because the stakes were high because, because

00:26:16.440 their hand was forced around the impact, because if they didn't do something, then it was going

00:26:22.560 to be really bad.

00:26:24.880 And, and I don't think we all have to have that, but, but transformation and paradigm shifts,

00:26:30.360 they're kind of rooted in that space of full, being fully present to the impact of how we

00:26:37.680 show up in the world.

00:26:38.420 That that's why when people get divorced, it rocks their world because you're forced

00:26:44.200 with dealing like, okay, what's now going to be my impact.

00:26:47.860 And, and if I don't pivot and change, do I want to do this again?

00:26:51.540 Well, we could come up, you could come up with that realization before getting divorced,

00:26:55.900 but we choose not to.

00:26:58.840 And, and it's not until that is in our face that we're forced to deal with that.

00:27:02.660 So we can make that choice and identify that level of impact and, and do that through agency,

00:27:10.400 not have it forced upon us.

00:27:11.900 I really do believe that.

00:27:13.080 Do you, do you believe that at all?

00:27:14.820 Or do you feel like, I don't know that, that you can through choice, get present to impact

00:27:22.120 and have transformation and paradigms in route, in regards to how you see the world?

00:27:27.080 Or do you think it kind of, the world has to act upon you?

00:27:30.540 No, I think you can.

00:27:32.180 It takes two things.

00:27:33.540 I believe it is harder.

00:27:35.820 And you said one of them, it, it takes presence.

00:27:38.440 So being aware of it, and it takes one other thing that most of us lack courage, because let's

00:27:45.620 say, for example, you notice your marriage is on the rocks.

00:27:49.760 You're, maybe you're even present to it, but you don't think it's as bad as, as you

00:27:54.720 do, but you lack the courage to bring up a difficult conversation.

00:27:59.220 It's not going to get better.

00:28:00.640 If you notice that your physical health is just deteriorating and maybe you're drinking

00:28:05.760 too much, or you're 50, 80, a hundred pounds overweight, and you know, it's bad, you know,

00:28:10.780 you need to do something, but you're too afraid to go into the gym for the first time, then

00:28:15.880 you're going to get diabetes before you go to the gym.

00:28:17.820 So it takes presence and it takes courage to do what you know you should be doing.

00:28:23.240 And courage doesn't require anything.

00:28:24.940 There's no prerequisite to courage.

00:28:26.840 There's no level of confidence that you need.

00:28:29.400 In fact, if you're confident in the thing, you wouldn't need courage at all because you

00:28:32.540 wouldn't be afraid.

00:28:33.520 So there's no prerequisite to courage.

00:28:36.040 Courage stands alone.

00:28:37.320 You can just decide to be courageous in the moment.

00:28:39.560 And that means having a difficult conversation with your wife, going into the gym, starting

00:28:45.040 that business, even with the fear of failure, all the things that you know you should be

00:28:49.200 doing require courage, which does not require anything else before you exhibit it.

00:28:55.060 I'm glad I asked that question.

00:28:56.220 That's a really great distinction.

00:28:58.100 I think that's really valuable.

00:29:00.040 Yeah, it's important.

00:29:01.520 Josh Fryer.

00:29:02.520 In my family, the Christmas season is filled with emotional highs and lows.

00:29:06.880 Fun family outings lead to overtired kids and overextended budgets.

00:29:12.220 Baking trays of goodies leads to lots of smiles, but many tears were shed during the process.

00:29:17.300 Conflicting invites lead to hurt feelings and holiday politicking.

00:29:22.400 Many of these things are done in the name of tradition and found memories of doing it ourselves

00:29:26.860 as youngsters.

00:29:27.800 For those of other faiths, I imagine that there are similar experiences with the holidays,

00:29:32.140 such as Diwali and Ramadhan.

00:29:35.240 So here's my question.

00:29:36.620 How do you discern between valuable traditions, expected traditions, and busy work traditions?

00:29:43.400 One that I had a hard time with, I still do, is family pictures and postcard thing.

00:29:50.280 What, I have to go out and spend $500 on postcards to send out to people I don't even know?

00:29:55.580 Help me understand this.

00:29:56.780 Like, help me understand the insanity.

00:29:59.360 Oh, that's funny. 1.00

00:30:01.180 That's dumb. 0.95

00:30:02.720 Like, I don't, I got to be careful because I'm going to get postcards from people who 0.98

00:30:08.240 do this podcast.

00:30:10.480 Well, I'm thinking, you know, I'm doing right now.

00:30:12.700 I'm multitasking, taking you off my list of, uh.

00:30:15.200 Yeah.

00:30:16.000 I'm like, I'll leave it there.

00:30:19.300 I'll leave it there.

00:30:20.020 I think you just decide.

00:30:22.200 Look, I think you let some things go.

00:30:24.180 Look, the postcard thing again. 1.00

00:30:25.580 Look, the postcard thing is dumb. 0.99

00:30:28.100 Is it that dumb that I had to make a big stink of it all the time? 0.99

00:30:31.260 No. 0.97

00:30:32.400 Not really.

00:30:33.800 Yeah.

00:30:34.160 So, that's one I probably, given the chance to do it over again, I would just let go of.

00:30:40.440 If it's important to her, and it cost me a few hundred bucks, but she likes it, and I'm

00:30:46.620 okay, I'm in the financial position to do it, that I don't need to be, as frankly as I 0.96

00:30:52.100 can say, a little bitch about it. 1.00

00:30:54.240 Yeah. 1.00

00:30:54.480 We just let it go.

00:30:55.500 And I think there are some things that we could just let go of.

00:30:59.060 You know, if mom wants you over early because she wants the grandkids there, but you're busy,

00:31:04.100 you know, give her one. 1.00

00:31:06.340 Take one for the team.

00:31:07.960 And if it doesn't really impact you that much, maybe we just let go of things a little bit

00:31:11.900 and just realize, hey, this is an important time for other people too.

00:31:15.380 Now, there are some things that conflict.

00:31:17.080 And in those conflicts, I would say, number one is have a clear plan with your wife.

00:31:22.080 That's the most important thing.

00:31:23.440 And she's first, not your mom, not your family, not her family, not your kids, not, no, she's 0.82

00:31:28.920 first.

00:31:29.320 You guys are a partnership.

00:31:30.680 So have a clear expectation with her.

00:31:33.400 Hey, hon, every other year we go to each other's in-laws.

00:31:37.740 So this year is my year, next year's your year, and so on and so forth.

00:31:41.480 As long as you guys are on the same page, then you can talk about who takes the lead in

00:31:46.720 that conversation.

00:31:47.640 She might not feel comfortable doing it.

00:31:49.100 And so you do it or vice versa.

00:31:50.620 But as long as you're on the same page, and then you're just communicating those expectations,

00:31:54.860 and here's another part of letting go, letting go of the result of it.

00:31:58.920 If you're having a conversation with your mom, for example, about, hey, you know, this

00:32:03.100 is the year that we go over to Cindy's families.

00:32:08.120 That's it.

00:32:09.500 And if you bring that conversation up early, and the expectation is there, and you always

00:32:13.540 follow through on that, great.

00:32:14.940 If you can make some other concessions, like, hey, we go over there every other year.

00:32:20.780 We're going to be there this year.

00:32:21.920 But we can come over on Tuesday night, and we can do a little gift exchange, or we can

00:32:26.760 have a small dinner, or we can do breakfast.

00:32:29.480 You can make some concessions where you can.

00:32:32.700 But yeah, expectations, letting go, and then making some concessions on some things that

00:32:38.920 don't really actually matter in the grand scheme of things.

00:32:41.140 Yeah, where I go wrong here is I will sacrifice the value of the event for the convenience of

00:32:51.200 the moment.

00:32:52.460 I don't want to go get a tree at the lot, and see the Santa Claus, and paint the reindeer,

00:32:58.440 and it's freezing cold.

00:33:00.540 I don't want to do it. 0.98

00:33:02.420 And so I might jump on Josh's train and go, oh, this is one of those traditions that's dumb. 0.95

00:33:07.820 But in reality, my kids soak it up. 0.98

00:33:11.520 They love it.

00:33:12.940 And they'll remember it, because we do it every year.

00:33:16.320 And so these aren't necessarily like polarizing dichotomies either, right?

00:33:21.360 It's like, well, it's a waste of time, or is it difficult?

00:33:24.140 Well, sometimes it's worth it, and it's difficult.

00:33:27.480 So the question is, what's the fruit that you're trying to get off the tree?

00:33:32.160 And is it valuable enough?

00:33:33.420 And if so, maybe the answer is to change our attitude a little bit and enjoy it, you know,

00:33:40.760 don't make it wrong, because that's what our kids will remember.

00:33:44.040 So but that's where I go wrong.

00:33:46.120 Like, I think like, oh, we shouldn't do these things.

00:33:48.320 But I know, once we do them, I go, yeah, I'm glad we did that.

00:33:52.920 Yeah.

00:33:53.840 The opposite is also true, where you might have a tradition, or you play some sort of

00:33:58.940 nostalgic story in your head, and you think, well, I'm going to do this with my kids, and

00:34:02.020 they hate it.

00:34:02.400 It's so amazing.

00:34:03.280 Yeah.

00:34:03.520 And it's not.

00:34:04.120 Yeah, like, I was thinking about this, I bought some ornaments the other day, when my kids

00:34:10.360 are with their mother, and I saved them, I set them by the tree, I saved them, I set

00:34:14.700 them by the tree.

00:34:15.900 And I was like, this will be fun to do when they come over on, you know, Wednesday night,

00:34:19.400 this will be fun, we'll all do it together.

00:34:20.800 It was not fun.

00:34:23.240 I didn't mind it, it was fine with me, I liked it, decorate the tree together as a family. 0.95

00:34:27.200 And my oldest is like, this dumb dad, can I go play Fortnite? 0.97

00:34:30.720 Or like, can I go play basketball? 0.99

00:34:33.460 And my youngest is like, yeah, I want to play video games.

00:34:35.600 And my two kids are like, we're gonna go wrestle.

00:34:38.500 And I'm like, well, that's the only one decorating the tree by yourself, which I could have done

00:34:43.580 two days earlier, and that would have been fine, you know, without all the headache and

00:34:47.260 hassle.

00:34:47.800 And it's fine.

00:34:48.640 It really is fine.

00:34:50.600 But then there's other things to your point where they do enjoy, and they do like, and

00:34:53.720 I can make those concessions.

00:34:54.940 And I can realize that this is an important part of their experience growing up, that they'll

00:34:58.800 never get back when they turn 42 years old, like, like me, and, and finding joy in that

00:35:06.400 as opposed to the activity.

00:35:08.380 Yeah.

00:35:09.540 Yeah, good point.

00:35:10.920 Good point.

00:35:12.060 Trevor Burrow, having touched, having touched on your dating life last week, at your stage

00:35:18.780 in life, assuming you don't want more children, what constitutes a woman of value for you?

00:35:24.200 I was curious, because the typical factors of youth and or reproductivity capacity, most

00:35:31.420 likely aren't as high of a priority.

00:35:34.080 Those are liabilities at this point.

00:35:35.880 Let's get right into this.

00:35:37.020 Those two things at this point are liabilities for me as a 42 year old man, somebody who's

00:35:41.660 young, like, I immediately I just immaturity comes to mind.

00:35:45.680 You see these guys who go through divorces or midlife crises, and they start dating 20 year

00:35:50.020 old women. 0.91

00:35:50.420 And I'm like, Oh, that sounds miserable. 0.99

00:35:53.140 I mean, she looks great, but that sounds miserable.

00:35:58.100 So I would, so I would say, yeah, that's a liability, reproductivity.

00:36:03.460 Yeah.

00:36:03.860 I'm not interested in more kids.

00:36:05.220 So if I, if I were to date somebody who wanted more kids, it's, it's a no for me.

00:36:09.900 And it's a no for them.

00:36:11.400 Yeah.

00:36:11.760 And that's okay.

00:36:12.520 Not alignment.

00:36:13.860 Yeah.

00:36:14.220 And it's important to figure that out because you could fall in love with somebody who you're

00:36:18.660 misaligned with on important issues, like children, for example, you can very easily

00:36:22.320 fall in love with, with somebody like that.

00:36:24.020 And then your love takes over and then it just creates a whole bunch of problems down

00:36:28.720 the road.

00:36:29.620 So I'm really interested in dating people, women who are aligned with, with me and those

00:36:37.260 big, important factors.

00:36:38.560 But a high value woman, I think is somebody who is, here's the biggest thing, somebody 1.00

00:36:44.640 who doesn't need me.

00:36:46.080 Actually, that's, that's a value that I find really attractive.

00:36:51.600 And I would say a high value, uh, characteristic signal, I guess, maybe because it means that

00:37:00.060 they're, they can take care of themselves and it means they're independent.

00:37:02.980 And it means that they're, they're intelligent or maybe have their financial house.

00:37:08.480 It means a whole lot of different things.

00:37:11.640 So I'm, I don't, I don't want to be with someone who needs me.

00:37:17.220 I want to be with somebody who doesn't need me, but chooses me.

00:37:22.500 Uh, I, I also think high value in a, in a woman is somebody who can be honest with you

00:37:28.220 about their past, the good, the bad, and the ugly.

00:37:31.280 And as, as a man who's, who has dated women, obviously because of my age, who have gone

00:37:39.100 through divorces and have children, like we all, I have baggage, we all have baggage.

00:37:45.000 And I want some, somebody who can shoot straight with me about it.

00:37:48.120 Somebody who I can see has learned from those things as, as I hope I have and will continue

00:37:53.400 to learn.

00:37:53.800 Uh, a little bit of financial independence is important.

00:37:58.320 Finances are important to me.

00:38:00.020 So if I'm in a relationship with somebody who is reckless with their money, that's not

00:38:04.260 going to work for me.

00:38:05.520 That's going to be an issue.

00:38:06.740 We're going to worry.

00:38:07.640 We are going to have problems.

00:38:09.420 So I want somebody who has their financial house in order.

00:38:14.140 They, whether they make decent money or not, as at less relevant to me because of the income

00:38:19.540 that I make as to how they handle and how they make financial stuff.

00:38:24.180 Yeah, sure.

00:38:25.140 Yeah.

00:38:25.480 Debt.

00:38:26.040 What's their, what are their spending habits like those types of things?

00:38:30.080 Got it.

00:38:30.740 Uh, and then also if, if, uh, again, as a, as a man who, you know, obviously has dated and

00:38:38.000 we'll date women with likely that have children. 0.99

00:38:41.740 I want to know what kind of mother she's going to be, what kind of mother she is. 0.52

00:38:45.900 If I see her interacting with her child or children and it's, and I cringe, I don't like

00:38:50.860 the parenting style.

00:38:53.220 Uh, yeah, that's not going to work for me either.

00:38:55.960 I've got four kids.

00:38:56.980 It's going to be a mess.

00:38:58.360 Yeah.

00:38:59.140 So I need somebody who is a, is a good mother who I can see has a great relationship with,

00:39:06.040 with, with their daughter or son or children.

00:39:09.080 That's important to me because I want to be a good dad.

00:39:12.340 And if I'm going to have this woman in my life, I want to know that I can be confident

00:39:17.480 in the dynamic, which is hard enough as it is, if you're merging families, but I want

00:39:22.340 to be comfortable enough in the dynamic where I feel like we can't, this can be a partner

00:39:28.560 to me and, and, and, and a mother in a way to my children.

00:39:32.440 That's, that's important.

00:39:33.260 And it's crucial.

00:39:34.640 I would say those are the biggest factors.

00:39:36.740 There's little things, of course, you know, that aren't as big, like what color hair does

00:39:41.020 she have?

00:39:41.460 Like, that's not a high value thing, right?

00:39:43.440 What does her body look like? 1.00

00:39:44.860 I mean, body's important.

00:39:46.560 Yeah.

00:39:47.060 You know, obviously physical attractiveness, but body's important because there's just a

00:39:50.280 person who takes care of themselves, their health.

00:39:53.380 That's, I try to, I want somebody who's going to do the same.

00:39:56.200 Cause if, look, if they don't, if they don't take care of themselves physically,

00:39:59.720 but you do, they're not, not only are you going to be not as attracted to this individual,

00:40:06.980 but they're never going to get you.

00:40:09.020 They're never going to understand you when you get up and you say, Hey, I'm going to go

00:40:12.100 to the gym at 5 a.m.

00:40:13.140 And you're like, why?

00:40:14.920 And you're, it's always going to be contentious.

00:40:17.660 So yeah, totally.

00:40:20.180 So listen up ladies to learn more about Ryan, go to order a man.com for his complete profile

00:40:28.240 and top 100 list items, including your physical characteristics.

00:40:32.360 That is a top priority.

00:40:36.140 Order a man. 0.99

00:40:37.640 I order a man.com.

00:40:39.720 I actually own that website, by the way, and that is legitimately certifiably true.

00:40:44.460 No, I don't, I'm not putting my picture up there, but maybe I'll, maybe I'll help some

00:40:48.900 of the other men and men and women, uh, find, find a companion this holiday season.

00:40:54.380 We should just take the guy.

00:40:55.960 Cause the guys of the iron council are a high caliber men.

00:40:59.160 We, we, we take a survey, figure out everybody that's that's single.

00:41:03.360 And, and they have a corresponding profile on order a man.com.

00:41:07.080 It's, it's brilliant.

00:41:08.220 And you can make money like charge them a monthly to have their profile up.

00:41:12.560 If they get married, then you get a bonus, you know, for every year of marriage that was

00:41:16.980 successful or they have to pay me for every year that they're successful.

00:41:20.340 I like that.

00:41:21.240 I like where your head's on on that one.

00:41:22.700 I don't know if that one's fine.

00:41:24.120 I do.

00:41:24.600 I do like that idea.

00:41:26.640 You made it five years.

00:41:28.740 Congratulations.

00:41:29.100 I know Ryan's an ordained minister.

00:41:31.220 So if you happen to get married from order a man.com, your, your wedding can be done by

00:41:39.020 Mr.

00:41:39.460 Mickler himself.

00:41:41.320 Get me in so much trouble.

00:41:43.320 I think, um, I think I'm ordained in one state.

00:41:46.540 So if you happen to be in the great state of Louisiana, then you and I can talk about it.

00:41:53.120 Yeah.

00:41:53.760 Yeah.

00:41:54.400 Oh man.

00:41:55.520 That's good.

00:41:57.340 Okay.

00:41:58.020 Greg.

00:41:58.340 Is it, is it good?

00:41:59.260 Because you just created a whole bunch of problems for me on the back end that you would

00:42:03.200 never see.

00:42:04.180 Well, as you're talking, I'm, I'm thinking if, if, if I was the chick, a chick dating Ryan,

00:42:10.760 this is the episode I'm listening to.

00:42:12.880 Right.

00:42:13.320 And I'm just kind of listening to what he thinks is valuable, you know, and probably placing

00:42:17.580 all types of pivots and adjustments in my relationship.

00:42:20.560 So you probably shouldn't have it out there, but.

00:42:23.400 Or maybe, or maybe I, I'm good at picking.

00:42:27.000 I don't know.

00:42:27.440 I'm good at picking.

00:42:28.200 And maybe that person already checks all the boxes.

00:42:32.320 So you want to hear a funny story, quick, funny story.

00:42:35.520 I got divorced.

00:42:36.600 Um, I was what, probably, I don't know, 26, 27.

00:42:42.380 And I go to a club, meet this super cute girl, get her number. 1.00

00:42:46.800 We exchange numbers.

00:42:47.640 Like a couple of days later, she goes, Hey, I have tickets to go watch the plain white

00:42:51.200 teas in concert.

00:42:52.320 Do you want to go?

00:42:53.460 Absolutely.

00:42:54.000 Sounds great.

00:42:54.520 So we go to concert, have a great night.

00:42:57.340 I'm kind of digging her, right?

00:42:58.860 She's, she's super pretty. 1.00

00:43:01.280 And, um, the next day I buy, buy her that CD.

00:43:04.240 This is back in the day when people bought CDs.

00:43:05.980 So I bought the CD there of their new album.

00:43:08.200 And I said, Hey, where are you at right now?

00:43:10.560 I have something for you.

00:43:11.500 And I want to drop that off is kind of a gift of like, Hey, thanks for taking me to that

00:43:15.060 concert.

00:43:15.980 Gives me the address.

00:43:17.640 I go to this house, I knock on the door and this older gentleman answers.

00:43:22.440 And I asked for, he's like, Oh, yeah, let me go get her.

00:43:25.060 And I'm thinking like, what is going on here?

00:43:27.320 Is that her dad?

00:43:28.620 Right.

00:43:29.380 And so I'm like, Hey, so who, who all lives here?

00:43:32.840 And she's like, Oh, I live with my parents.

00:43:34.320 And then, and I started asking other questions that I should have asked like weeks ago.

00:43:38.000 Like, how old are you?

00:43:39.940 That'd have been, that'd have been the first question, other questions.

00:43:42.780 And I was immediately like, I am out of here as fast as humanly possible before dad goes,

00:43:48.940 how old are you?

00:43:49.920 And Oh, you have two kids and you've been divorced.

00:43:52.540 I'm like, Oh, I am off base here.

00:43:55.060 Like how old was she?

00:43:56.080 She was 18.

00:43:56.740 At least she's like a freshman in college. 0.72

00:43:58.840 And I was like, Oh my goodness, like, this is not going to work.

00:44:02.520 And so obviously never saw her again, but I was like, yeah, I should, I should have clarified

00:44:08.020 some things up front before we started dating.

00:44:10.800 So, yeah, yeah.

00:44:15.080 Dating is interesting.

00:44:16.980 All right.

00:44:17.240 What's next?

00:44:18.180 Yeah.

00:44:18.420 Better you than me.

00:44:19.760 All right.

00:44:20.100 Greg Cleaver.

00:44:20.860 Do you believe that personal rights and freedoms have any boundaries or dare I say this limitations

00:44:27.340 by this?

00:44:28.680 I mean, at, at a point at which an individual's personal rights seriously impacts the collective

00:44:34.000 good of other individuals.

00:44:35.500 He uses like a quick example here, for example, a mental health patient with paranoid schizophrenia,

00:44:41.060 living mostly independent in a community who has successfully agreed to personal rights

00:44:46.760 to refuse to take medication and puts others at risk.

00:44:51.740 I'm, I'm, I'll go ahead.

00:44:53.060 Go ahead.

00:44:53.920 No, he's just, and that's the question is, is there a case where personal rights, um,

00:45:00.020 isn't the top priority?

00:45:01.920 Yes, of course.

00:45:03.060 Of course.

00:45:04.100 And here's, here's the line.

00:45:05.940 Your personal rights don't supersede my personal rights.

00:45:09.460 That's the line.

00:45:10.880 Yeah.

00:45:11.700 So if you, if you're a paranoid schizophrenic, I think is the term he used and you are live

00:45:19.300 in my neighborhood and you impose your personal rights, but it infringes on mine, then you've 0.86

00:45:26.920 crossed the line.

00:45:27.700 Yeah, absolutely.

00:45:28.900 You don't get to infringe on my personal rights because you have your own personal rights.

00:45:34.680 So our personal rights extend to the point of infringing on other people's rights.

00:45:40.880 What's your thoughts when it comes to mitigating that?

00:45:44.360 So for instance, the, in this example, the person's personal rights is, Hey, I'm schizophrenia.

00:45:50.640 I don't want to take the medication, but maybe I haven't infringed on anybody yet, but because

00:45:58.260 of the concern of infringing on other personal rights, we take the way, the personal right

00:46:03.100 for someone to get off their medication.

00:46:04.960 Then you're taking away their personal rights and it hasn't infringed on yours yet.

00:46:08.060 It falls within my qualifier.

00:46:09.920 You're, you're asking to take away somebody's personal rights.

00:46:12.980 This is not minority report here.

00:46:14.900 Like we don't know what's, it's unfortunate.

00:46:17.080 Like I know there's dangerous people out there and this is why it's so important that we are

00:46:21.660 vigilant, that we are trained, that we protect ourselves and other people that we secure

00:46:26.180 our, our places that are, our dwelling is safe and comfortable and secure.

00:46:30.840 That is very important because there are dangerous people out there who have never

00:46:35.960 quote unquote been dangerous yet, but we don't get to infringe on those personal rights

00:46:41.060 because they have not yet infringed upon anybody else's.

00:46:45.660 Now, once they have, then there's, it's, it's punitive.

00:46:49.040 There's punishment.

00:46:50.080 That could be that we just remove them from society because they've chosen on their own

00:46:54.740 that they don't want to adhere to the standard, which is you can have your rights as long

00:46:59.380 as you don't infringe on other people's.

00:47:01.500 And so that's, that's, that's prison.

00:47:03.180 That's, that's punishment.

00:47:04.080 In some cases, the death sentence, we need to remove those people from society.

00:47:07.580 Now, in the case of mental illness, have they chosen?

00:47:10.340 I would say, I mean, I'm not a mental health professional, but somebody who's severely

00:47:15.460 mentally handicapped or mentally challenged or has some sort of mental diagnosis.

00:47:22.440 Yeah, I think you can make the argument that they haven't chosen, but that doesn't mean

00:47:27.380 that because they haven't chosen, now they get a pass to infringe on my rights.

00:47:31.960 That's not how this works.

00:47:33.900 Yeah.

00:47:34.580 So that person has to be removed appropriately from society.

00:47:37.940 Is that somebody who can be counseled and redeemed?

00:47:39.980 Good.

00:47:40.280 Let's, let's as a society, think about doing that.

00:47:42.880 Is that somebody who is a constant danger to society because they have proven to be a constant

00:47:47.380 danger?

00:47:47.780 Then we need to eliminate that person from society. 0.92

00:47:51.700 It's the only way in my mind. 0.76

00:47:54.140 Yeah.

00:47:54.420 Do you want to talk about the dangers of preemptively taking away rights to help mitigate risk?

00:48:02.140 Well, that, that, that's an easy one.

00:48:04.180 The, the danger of preemptively taking away rights is who gets to qualify and what are the

00:48:09.680 qualifiers?

00:48:10.320 So for example, uh, if, if you, red flag laws are one, yeah, you know, and, and look, I think

00:48:19.100 there's, there's certain circumstances where you voluntarily relinquish your right to carry

00:48:25.500 a firearm in this country.

00:48:26.820 If you're a felon, yeah, I don't want felons carrying firearms.

00:48:29.820 I'm, I'm okay with that, but who gets to decide and what are the parameters in which they decide

00:48:35.600 when and where, and what is appropriate to take away somebody's firearm, just as an example.

00:48:40.480 So the danger is we're giving away our personal sovereignty, hoping that somebody else is virtuous,

00:48:47.560 righteous, and noble.

00:48:48.720 And they're not because we're not all the time.

00:48:52.500 So we know they're not, and their goals and their values and their desires aren't going

00:48:58.960 to be in alignment with ours.

00:49:00.180 So that's the problem with letting somebody else dictate when it's appropriate and when

00:49:06.020 it isn't, it's just, it's a recipe for disaster.

00:49:11.460 Absolutely.

00:49:12.440 Yeah.

00:49:12.940 And I, I'm sure we could sit here for another hour and talk through all the scenarios that

00:49:17.520 could go wrong in that example.

00:49:20.100 And, and, and what we've done, what government has done thus far and done so poorly.

00:49:26.640 So it's not just like hypothetical.

00:49:29.060 It's like, we have evidence of that not working out very well.

00:49:32.520 Yeah.

00:49:32.680 Which leads us to believe, at least me to believe. 1.00

00:49:36.460 I used to think that certain policies were based on stupidity or ignorance. 0.99

00:49:43.780 And I think some are, but because of the mountains and the piles of evidence we have 0.99

00:49:48.360 around economic systems, for example, we can now, it's safe to assume, come to the conclusion 0.98

00:49:55.420 that this isn't ignorance or stupidity. 0.99

00:49:58.920 This is malicious. 0.99

00:50:01.100 And there's a greater design here than we didn't know communism didn't work.

00:50:07.320 Like, you know, you know how it works. 1.00

00:50:10.520 Don't play the stupid card. 1.00

00:50:13.180 Yeah. 1.00

00:50:14.100 All right.

00:50:14.900 Hopping over to Facebook.

00:50:16.440 Join us there by going to facebook.com slash group slash order, man.

00:50:19.980 Jason King, your best books of the year.

00:50:23.660 Uh, who best books of the year.

00:50:25.740 Wow.

00:50:26.280 Just, um, just offend half your guests on the podcast.

00:50:30.000 Yeah.

00:50:30.440 That's easy to do.

00:50:31.940 Easy to do.

00:50:33.000 Um, I, I really like all of Jack Carr's books.

00:50:35.460 If you're looking for something fictional, Jack Carr, uh, James Reese series is really good.

00:50:42.080 Um, I really enjoyed the last two books.

00:50:45.620 In fact, I'm still going through them right now.

00:50:47.180 Limitless, uh, by Jim quick.

00:50:49.300 We talked about this and moonshot by Mike Massimino.

00:50:52.960 Both are, uh, podcast guests in the last four weeks or so.

00:50:56.420 Both of those are really good.

00:50:57.740 Uh, my books are out front, so it's hard because sometimes I have to look at them to

00:51:02.360 remember which I, I read and which I really liked.

00:51:05.460 Is men's work resonating with you?

00:51:07.800 I mean, I know it's fresh, but yeah, men's work, men's work was hard for me at first to

00:51:13.620 get through Connor Beaton's a friend and we even talked about this.

00:51:16.400 I was on his, he was on my podcast.

00:51:18.540 It was hard for me to get through because that's a side that I was really closed off to

00:51:23.460 the shadow work, father wounds, emotional work.

00:51:27.680 Uh, it's more, it's different than the way that we approach it, but that's one that,

00:51:32.320 yeah, that does resonate with me quite a bit.

00:51:34.600 Actually, now that I know Connor and where he's coming from and I see a lot of what he

00:51:38.560 puts out on social media.

00:51:39.720 I'm like, yeah, it's, it's actually really good.

00:51:41.860 And it gives me a perspective that I don't typically go to immediately on my own.

00:51:46.580 Yeah, totally.

00:51:47.800 All right.

00:51:48.100 Steve Hughes, how do you change an ingrained negative attitude towards a business held

00:51:53.940 by the employees?

00:51:55.880 I enjoy what I do and the majority of the team are great to work with yet.

00:51:59.800 I find myself more and more not wanting to go to work.

00:52:03.060 It is only a minority that have a negative attitudes yet.

00:52:06.280 They seem to have the loudest voice.

00:52:08.960 I know I'm not the only one it has taken a toll on, uh, uh, yet upper management don't

00:52:14.580 seem to be interested in rectifying the issue, even though it has been mentioned by many,

00:52:19.520 many, many employees over the many months.

00:52:22.200 So just like people coming to work and having a negative attitude about being there.

00:52:27.080 Is that what you got out of that?

00:52:30.000 No, I, I think not a negative attitude about being there.

00:52:33.300 I think they're creating a, uh, toxic work environment.

00:52:36.760 This is what I'm gathering.

00:52:37.780 Got it.

00:52:38.040 Yeah.

00:52:38.280 Through their negative attitudes of, of work.

00:52:40.760 Yeah, sure.

00:52:41.620 Got it.

00:52:41.840 Yeah.

00:52:42.000 And I don't even know if it's just work necessarily, or just their attitude.

00:52:45.120 I mean, we don't know that.

00:52:46.260 Right.

00:52:46.580 We don't, we don't know what that is, but yeah, I would say, yeah, I think we're on the

00:52:50.140 same page.

00:52:51.240 Well, look, I mean, really, there's only, there's only a handful of things you can do.

00:52:54.200 You can make a decision just to be happy and cheerful and, and do the best work that

00:52:58.380 you can do in the circumstances you're in.

00:53:00.120 It's a grind.

00:53:00.680 Yeah.

00:53:01.080 I mean, and, and, and hopefully you can recruit a couple of people along the way who see that,

00:53:05.180 man, this guy's doing it.

00:53:06.400 I can do it.

00:53:07.080 He seems to be positive.

00:53:08.260 He seems to be moving the needle.

00:53:09.780 He's getting pay raises.

00:53:10.620 He's getting promotions.

00:53:11.640 I think I'm interested in that.

00:53:12.740 And you take those people with you and, you know, like, let's do this together.

00:53:16.480 And you lead the charge in changing the culture and the dynamic of the, of, of the organization.

00:53:22.980 You do that, whether or not these people join you or not, because it's going to make your

00:53:27.140 life better.

00:53:28.560 You could be miserable at work or you could decide not to be.

00:53:31.780 And you could be, for me, I wouldn't even say be happy.

00:53:34.740 Cause I think sometimes it's just be happy.

00:53:37.560 No, be productive.

00:53:38.600 That's what I would say.

00:53:40.020 Yeah.

00:53:40.600 When you just be as productive as you can be.

00:53:43.680 And you know, that having a negative attitude or dealing with certain people is not going

00:53:47.560 to help your productivity.

00:53:48.340 So you purge those people to the degree that you can from your, your personal ecosystem

00:53:55.020 that you're creating at work.

00:53:57.400 Yeah.

00:53:57.920 So the first choice is, is always, always, we talk about this.

00:54:02.440 How many times have we talked about this kid?

00:54:05.340 Maximize every opportunity that you have at work first.

00:54:09.240 Yeah.

00:54:10.400 Then from there, that's going to create opportunities for you either in your current work environment,

00:54:15.780 or you're going to begin to see other opportunities elsewhere.

00:54:19.300 And then you're going to leave and go to a company, go back another organization or start

00:54:24.300 your own business, go back either a week or two and listen to the podcast, the Friday

00:54:29.420 field notes I did on gratitude.

00:54:31.720 That one is probably, you know, not to toot my own horn on the, on this, but that one is

00:54:36.560 probably one of the most important Friday field notes I've done.

00:54:40.000 What the, and it's, I think I titled it a pragmatic guide to gratitude and it's, there's five points

00:54:49.060 in there that I make that will help you see why being grateful for your circumstances is

00:54:55.320 actually a very pragmatic approach to life.

00:54:57.540 It's not woo woo.

00:54:58.620 It's not hazy.

00:54:59.780 It's not, it's very pragmatic.

00:55:02.440 Yeah.

00:55:03.000 And, and I also talk about some things to be aware of.

00:55:05.900 One of them is that the grass is not always greener on the other side.

00:55:09.180 Yeah.

00:55:09.620 And even if it is water, well, think about this.

00:55:12.740 Here's one thing I thought about with that, that analogy that we often use the grass is

00:55:15.900 greener on the other side.

00:55:17.360 Well, if you take your current habits, the way you maintain your current yard and you

00:55:21.700 take that over to the other side, do you think that grass is going to stay green or do you

00:55:26.660 think that's going to become Brown and dirty too and die? 1.00

00:55:30.500 So learn what you can learn now to maintain your current field, your current grass, and see

00:55:37.720 if you can get that grass green first before you go over to the other side.

00:55:41.700 That's what I talk about.

00:55:42.780 For example, in marriage, a lot of guys will leave a marriage because they're not interested.

00:55:46.480 They're not happy.

00:55:47.100 They're not satisfied.

00:55:47.880 So they'll step out on their wife or they'll just flippantly go through a divorce or separation

00:55:53.020 thinking, oh, it hurts the woman. 1.00

00:55:54.940 I got to go find a different woman. 0.98

00:55:56.540 It's like, hold up, hold up.

00:55:57.680 I mean, you might be right.

00:55:58.400 We don't know yet.

00:55:58.980 You might be right.

00:56:00.340 But let's come up with a plan for you to water your current garden and get that grass

00:56:05.260 green first.

00:56:06.780 And if it works, great.

00:56:07.720 You don't need to go.

00:56:09.120 And you can maintain your responsibility.

00:56:11.000 You can uphold your obligation and commitment.

00:56:12.880 There might be children in the picture.

00:56:14.240 Certainly, it's going to be a better financial decision for you.

00:56:17.320 So let's see if we can fix this.

00:56:18.960 If after doing the work, you can't fix it and you decide, hey, I'm out, then when that

00:56:25.140 next healthy woman comes into your life, you're going to be able to do this the right way because 1.00

00:56:30.060 you already learned the skill set you needed to learn in order to have a more healthy relationship

00:56:34.300 moving forward.

00:56:35.900 Absolutely.

00:56:36.700 Here's a tactical thing for Steve really quick.

00:56:38.960 And there's ways that you can lead by example and then shed some light on the importance

00:56:47.600 of it.

00:56:48.180 So Steve, look at your role, what winning looks like, and evaluate your skill and abilities

00:56:55.940 of where you are.

00:56:57.580 Then evaluate the effort that you're putting into it.

00:57:01.340 And then the impact you have on your team and your boss.

00:57:05.320 And then you go to your boss and say, this is where I'm at.

00:57:08.400 Here's my skills.

00:57:10.200 I'm winning.

00:57:10.880 I'm not winning.

00:57:11.780 Here's my current skills.

00:57:12.900 This is what I'm doing to improve those.

00:57:14.500 This is what I'm doing on the effort front so I can improve and provide better service

00:57:19.480 to you and the team.

00:57:20.600 And here's my impact on the team.

00:57:23.100 I show up positively and blah, blah, blah.

00:57:24.840 It makes the team feel good.

00:57:26.060 I'm unified in our focus, whatever.

00:57:28.480 And then communicate that.

00:57:30.180 Those three areas, ability, effort, and impact.

00:57:32.920 And your boss will be like, man, yeah, that impact is really important, right?

00:57:37.180 There's many ways that you can shed some light in regards to the importance of attitude around

00:57:42.280 the office.

00:57:43.360 Be that example.

00:57:44.540 And in some cases, you might even want to do an assessment and report it back up and

00:57:48.880 maybe put that on the radar for the boss to consider maybe for the other employees in

00:57:53.140 your team.

00:57:53.620 And who knows where that might go.

00:57:55.760 So don't be manipulative.

00:57:58.120 Have the right intent because that will taste and smell and people will see that on you.

00:58:03.880 So don't do it as a way of like trying to manipulate people.

00:58:07.700 Like generally do it.

00:58:08.780 Lead from the front and never know.

00:58:11.960 But worst case, you grow and learn.

00:58:14.260 And if the impact is great on the company and there's some shift, awesome.

00:58:17.520 That's great too.

00:58:18.960 I like it.

00:58:19.760 What's next?

00:58:20.160 Let's take one more, Kip.

00:58:21.380 One more.

00:58:21.860 Bob Ross, how do you deal with fear?

00:58:23.940 Or I'm trying to think as I answer that when I have been afraid, I don't know that I've

00:58:29.440 ever been, not ever, but I don't know recently if I've been so afraid that I thought something

00:58:34.640 was going to permanently hurt or injure me or kill me. 0.91

00:58:38.240 And that's how I approach it.

00:58:39.760 What's the worst that can happen if I go through with this?

00:58:43.720 You know, whether it's fear with starting a business or communicating how you feel to

00:58:48.720 a woman or...

00:58:52.280 So mitigate the risk.

00:58:54.340 No, just play it out.

00:58:55.700 Mitigate the risk and clarify the impact?

00:58:57.360 No, I don't even think mitigate the risk because the risk will oftentimes still be present.

00:59:01.300 The risk of you, for example, being rejected when you communicate your feelings towards

00:59:05.880 a woman is still going to be there. 1.00

00:59:07.780 Yeah.

00:59:08.400 The risk of you starting a business is still there.

00:59:11.040 You can't mitigate that by hiring a coach and having the right capital and getting involved

00:59:15.620 with people who have experience.

00:59:17.180 Sure.

00:59:17.960 Mitigating the risk is important, but just play it out.

00:59:20.480 Let it unfold.

00:59:21.020 Well, you know, if I don't go through with this, what will happen?

00:59:23.440 If I do go through this, what will happen?

00:59:25.980 And then I think just having an attitude of courage.

00:59:29.460 Yeah.

00:59:29.940 That when things get...

00:59:31.220 And decide that now.

00:59:32.140 You're going to be a courageous person.

00:59:33.340 That when things get scary or uncomfortable or you're fearful, that you're going to act

00:59:36.700 with courage.

00:59:37.140 And that's a virtue that is a priority for you.

00:59:39.760 Totally.

00:59:41.240 I wonder how often people have this thought, same thing as Ross does, around not acting

00:59:49.760 out of fear and those situations commonly being related to what it means about me and they've

00:59:58.360 lost sight of why they're actually doing it.

01:00:02.400 Public speaking, as an example.

01:00:05.020 You hear that a lot, right?

01:00:06.060 A lot of people, they have fear of public speaking.

01:00:08.640 Well, that fear has to do with me, right?

01:00:12.280 Sure.

01:00:12.540 I'm going to look this way.

01:00:13.580 I'm going to get judgments or whatever.

01:00:14.660 But if what I'm talking about is really important and if I get connected to the reason why I'm

01:00:22.060 doing this is to serve other people, I kind of lose my fear in it because it's not about

01:00:29.120 me and it's not about looking good, but now it's about something greater than oneself.

01:00:33.720 And I just wonder how often we don't do something that's kind of great because we're not focusing

01:00:40.720 on the great thing.

01:00:41.680 We're focusing on selfishly what this means about us.

01:00:46.260 Yeah.

01:00:47.080 Yeah.

01:00:47.660 I like that answer a lot because I think about that.

01:00:50.340 If you run that through any filter, public speaking, if you feel like your message is so

01:00:55.880 important that the world needs to hear it, then you'll get over your fear because you sharing

01:01:00.000 it is more weighted than you being afraid to share it.

01:01:05.160 Or if you starting the business because you have this idea that will really impact people

01:01:08.960 is so heavily weighted that it will outweigh the fear or the way that you feel about this

01:01:13.920 woman is so important that you want to communicate it. 0.97

01:01:17.340 And it's so heavily weighted that if you don't, it almost seems wrong if you don't say anything.

01:01:22.360 Totally.

01:01:23.600 Totally.

01:01:24.580 I like that a lot.

01:01:25.540 That's an interesting perspective.

01:01:26.660 Not really, not sure if it applies to all things, but probably most, I think.

01:01:32.900 Yeah.

01:01:33.040 I mean, unless we're talking about you're in physical danger, you know, like somebody's

01:01:36.480 got a gun pointed at your head.

01:01:38.480 Okay. 0.90

01:01:38.580 That's, but I don't know, even in that, maybe there's something so important to you.

01:01:44.180 Maybe it's another person where you're like, Hey, I got to protect this other person.

01:01:47.680 So that person's so much more important to me than I'm willing to put, put my, put myself

01:01:52.060 in harm's way here.

01:01:53.420 Yeah.

01:01:53.640 I mean, I've, I've, I don't know where I read this, but I, I remember I've had this thought

01:01:59.080 around the importance of dying without fear and how critical that is for your loved ones

01:02:06.200 more than it is important for you.

01:02:10.180 Like if you're fearful during that process, you're not serving your spouse and your kids.

01:02:15.980 And, and, you know, maybe at that moment, right.

01:02:20.740 That, that I would have the courage enough to show up powerfully in that transition in

01:02:26.160 a way, as a final way of service, uh, and put my own personal fears at bay for something

01:02:35.040 greater.

01:02:35.760 I don't know.

01:02:37.180 As you were saying that I was pulled, I pulled something up.

01:02:39.560 It's actually one of my favorite quotes.

01:02:41.000 It's, it's from Nathan Hale.

01:02:42.600 He was America's one of America's first spies, if I believe, but his, when, when faced with 0.79

01:02:49.020 treason and, and death, he said, I regret that I have, but one life to give for my country.

01:02:55.200 Like what a bad-ass. 0.98

01:02:57.240 Yeah.

01:02:58.060 What a way to go out.

01:02:59.880 Like if you're going to go, yeah, this is how I'm going to go.

01:03:03.700 And he chose that probably over the human fear of, I don't want to die.

01:03:09.400 Well, of course he did.

01:03:10.820 Cause you, I mean, you can't, it's not that he's not afraid of death.

01:03:14.260 Of course.

01:03:15.500 Like I would be, I mean, all of us would be.

01:03:18.680 Yeah.

01:03:18.760 He just chose something bigger.

01:03:20.000 He just chose.

01:03:20.800 Yeah.

01:03:21.300 Yeah.

01:03:21.720 I like it.

01:03:22.760 Cool.

01:03:23.280 All right.

01:03:23.460 All right.

01:03:24.860 So key thing, learn about the iron council order of man.com slash iron council.

01:03:29.800 We're opening up enrollment, um, on the 15th of December, and we'll keep that open until

01:03:35.540 the end of the year, this is to start with the cohort group in Jan one.

01:03:40.660 So if you want to hit the ground running in Jan one, you need to join us this month between

01:03:46.420 the 15th and the end of the month.

01:03:48.240 That's order of man.com slash iron council.

01:03:51.900 You can connect with Mr.

01:03:53.520 Mickler on Twitter and X and Instagram at Ryan Mickler.

01:03:58.740 Maybe you give us a quick update on ordering swag in the store, just so people understand

01:04:04.580 if there's still available product and if, you know, yeah, the whole shipping update.

01:04:09.320 Yeah.

01:04:09.400 There's still available product.

01:04:10.600 If you get everything in by the 10th, no later than the 10th of December, we can, we

01:04:14.160 can get it to you by Christmas after that.

01:04:16.340 I'm still going to try to get it to you to Christmas.

01:04:18.400 Uh, but it's going to be, there's a chance it won't, especially with busy shipping season.

01:04:23.200 It's all of that.

01:04:23.660 So I would say no later than the 10th, if you want to push it, you can maybe push it to

01:04:27.740 the 15th after that.

01:04:29.020 Yeah.

01:04:29.340 You're probably not getting your package before Christmas.

01:04:31.360 So that's store.orderman.com.

01:04:33.340 And then Kip, if you would, you're doing some really cool videos on Instagram, uh, that I've

01:04:37.820 seen that I, that I personally enjoy.

01:04:39.180 And I know you, I hear all these things, but the way that you present it is really powerful.

01:04:42.640 Can you just let the guys know where to connect with you as well?

01:04:44.940 So they can see that.

01:04:46.300 Yeah, sure.

01:04:46.760 Uh, at Kip Sorensen.

01:04:48.560 So K I P P S O R E N S E N, not Swedish, but Danish. 1.00

01:04:55.140 Really S E N is sweet Swedish.

01:04:57.740 Is Danish.

01:04:58.560 E N is Danish. 0.98

01:04:59.660 Oh, E N is Danish. 0.99

01:05:01.460 Got it.

01:05:01.820 Okay.

01:05:02.020 That's important.

01:05:02.580 There you go, guys.

01:05:03.420 There's your little history lesson.

01:05:06.480 All right, guys.

01:05:07.280 Appreciate everybody's questions today.

01:05:08.520 Hopefully as always, we gave you some good answers.

01:05:10.940 Go out there, take action and become the man you are meant to be.

01:05:14.200 Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast.

01:05:17.240 You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be.

01:05:21.220 We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.

01:05:27.740 Thank you.

01:05:28.600 Bye.

01:05:30.500 Bye.

The Limits of Personal Rights, Confronting Fear, and Wrestling with God's Will ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript

Order of Man

The Limits of Personal Rights, Confronting Fear, and Wrestling with God&#x27;s Will ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript

The Limits of Personal Rights, Confronting Fear, and Wrestling with God's Will ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING