Order of Man - The Plague of Overconsumption

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart

00:00:04.980 your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.

00:00:10.460 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong. This is your life. This is who

00:00:17.180 you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,

00:00:22.720 you can call yourself a man. Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Michler.

00:00:27.680 I'm the host and the founder of the Order of Man podcast and movement. Welcome here. Welcome

00:00:32.380 back. I'm going to shoot off the cuff a little bit here because there's been something that's been on

00:00:36.680 my mind over the past. Well, it's been on my mind for a long time, but specifically over the past

00:00:42.380 couple of weeks, and that is this plague of overconsumption. And it's very interesting to

00:00:47.480 me to see how many guys are so worried and just inundated with consume, consume, consume, get,

00:00:55.920 get, get, get, get, what can I get? How can I get mine? And then they wonder why they can't get

00:01:00.580 ahead. So we're going to talk about why over-consuming is the wrong mindset and why even

00:01:08.180 though it may feel like the right thing to do, it's actually hurting your chances of success in

00:01:15.080 your relationships, your business, with your clients, with your kids. It's just this mentality

00:01:21.800 of what can I get and how can I get mine? So before we do, I just want to tell you very,

00:01:26.820 very quickly, I'm going to steal a page from my friend, Andy Frisilla and ask that you please

00:01:32.140 leave a rating and review. All right. We don't ask a whole lot here. Of course, we've got programs and

00:01:37.720 courses and merchandise that you can pick up and that's on a obviously volunteer basis,

00:01:43.260 but I would love for you guys to just leave a rating and review. We've got tens of thousands,

00:01:48.640 almost hundreds of thousands at this point of men listening to this podcast. And I think we've

00:01:53.520 got like 6,000 reviews. So please stop consuming and start producing. That's what we're going to

00:02:00.720 talk about today and give back. If you feel like you've got any value, whether it's on this episode

00:02:07.340 or any number of the almost 800 episodes that we've done now, just go in, leave your little rating and

00:02:13.080 review. Again, it goes a long way in promoting the visibility of the show and getting this message

00:02:17.240 out to the masses. We do this podcast for free. There's time and energy and resources and money

00:02:23.660 that I have to contribute and pay in order to make this podcast run. So a rating and review doesn't

00:02:30.120 seem like a too big of an ask. So go do that. And that's going to tie in perfectly to what we're

00:02:35.200 talking about today, which is the concept of over-consumption. We live in this consumer-driven

00:02:42.480 society. And I was thinking about this as I'm walking around my house and even looking at my

00:02:46.660 office. I mean, look at all the shit that I have. I've got books that I've never read. I've got

00:02:51.700 paperwork stacked up to the brim. There's some gifts that people have sent me that I haven't even looked

00:02:59.080 at yet. It's disgusting at this point, how much stuff and shit that we have. And that's this level

00:03:08.740 of consumption. And then we get so inundated and consumed with all the bullshit and all the

00:03:13.800 physical possessions and all the, how can I get mine and get after mine that we can't actually

00:03:18.360 function. And then we wonder why we're not successful. It's because we're taking at every

00:03:23.320 turn, buy, take, steal, have people give you gifts. These are things you're not even going to use.

00:03:31.340 And what is it doing? It's taking up your mental capacity. That's what it's doing.

00:03:36.040 And physical capacity. If I look around my room, it's somewhat organized. It's about 80%

00:03:42.680 organized, but man, I'm trying to declutter. I'm trying to remove stuff. I'm trying to eliminate

00:03:47.560 stuff from my life, but it's so easy to consume. And we live in this market-driven age where

00:03:53.920 everybody's telling us why you have to have the latest gizmo, engagement, and knife, and product,

00:03:59.300 and shirt, and hat, and course, and all these other things that even I offer to you guys.

00:04:04.080 And yet none of us critically think about how that's impacting our life. We think that if we

00:04:09.700 have the new and latest phone or that we have the battle planner or this poster that's sitting on my

00:04:15.700 desk that I've had for a week that I haven't hung up or these gifts over here that somehow our life

00:04:20.640 is going to be better. I'm here to tell you it isn't. It isn't going to be better. If you want to

00:04:26.240 look at it in the context of your relationship and all you're worried about is getting from your wife,

00:04:30.080 getting what you think you need, why she isn't supporting you, why she isn't loving you,

00:04:34.800 why she isn't doing the things that a quote-unquote good wife should do.

00:04:39.240 Like you have no right to wonder why your life is not going the way that you want it to go.

00:04:44.120 Here's the shift in mentality, guys. Move from consumer to producer. Period. Bottom line. End of story.

00:04:53.480 Now, I'm not going to say that we get to completely remove ourselves from consumer. Of course, we're

00:04:59.620 going to be consumers at times. And I don't think that's necessarily bad. You know, we got to eat

00:05:04.300 food. I recommend books all the time. There's clothes that we need to wear. There's things that

00:05:10.500 we need physically, mentally, emotionally in our lives. But damn, if you can't figure out how to

00:05:16.300 produce more than you consume. And isn't this the difference between a man and a boy?

00:05:20.260 Like strip everything else away. Strip the size away. Strip the biology away. Strip the mentality

00:05:27.800 away. Strip the experience away. And isn't the main difference between a child, a little boy. I've

00:05:34.200 got three boys. I've got a daughter as well. But isn't the difference between the boys and the men,

00:05:39.120 the ability to produce more than we consume. And yet none of us, very few of us, I should say,

00:05:43.980 graduate from boy to man in this context. That's why so many of you guys are in debt.

00:05:52.820 Because you buy, buy, buy, buy. And you don't know how to produce more than you consume.

00:05:59.320 That's why your relationship is not as fulfilling as it should be. Because you're taking, taking,

00:06:03.220 taking. Get mine. Don't worry about her. All of what I have is at the expense of her. That's why

00:06:08.460 you're not successful in your career. I'm going to do just enough, just barely enough that I can do

00:06:13.700 to get by without getting fired or maybe, maybe secure that promotion. And then you guys bitch

00:06:18.480 and moan and you whine and you complain about why you didn't get the promotion. Because you're being

00:06:22.160 a loser. You're being a little boy. If I look at my three boys and my daughter, and I say this with

00:06:30.460 all due respect and all the love I have in my heart for them, they are consumers of resources.

00:06:34.980 My time, my energy, my resources, my money. And that's okay. We expect that. And I'm willing and

00:06:44.180 able and have a desire to shoulder that burden. I know every time I say that, somebody's like,

00:06:49.920 well, I can't believe you talk about your kids that way. Guys, hear what I'm saying.

00:06:55.000 They don't know how to cook food. They don't know how to provide any rent. They don't know how to

00:07:00.820 really clean up very much around the house. And so they consume and it's okay because we expect

00:07:05.500 that of them. But somewhere along the way, we've got to graduate from consumer primarily to producer

00:07:14.040 primarily. So if you want to, if you want to have value, add value, excuse me, and you want to be

00:07:19.920 valuable in life, it's not about how much you can get and extract and take from every situation and

00:07:25.120 encounter, it's how much you can give. And this moves you from the short-term game, which is like,

00:07:30.840 get mine. And I know a lot of guys in my life, especially early on, for example, my financial

00:07:36.260 planning practice who were knocking out of the park. So I thought, but what they were doing is

00:07:41.140 they were manipulating and they were coercing and they were being sleazebags. And so, yeah, you know,

00:07:46.960 they got to put up their numbers and they were posting big numbers, but you know what? Those guys

00:07:50.500 faded out. They phased out. They got run out of the business very, very quickly because everybody

00:07:55.300 started to see right through them. So are you worried about the short game or alternatively,

00:08:00.020 and here's what I did because I try to be a man of principle at least, is that I started adding value,

00:08:06.220 value, value, give, introduce, make referrals, help, give insight or direction or information that I could

00:08:14.000 to help people. And yeah, maybe you're not going to get paid for it immediately, but you know what?

00:08:18.740 Over five years, 10 years, 20 years, I'm significantly further down the road because

00:08:23.840 I'm more worried about giving to other people than I'm getting. Now, one of my favorite quotes

00:08:28.880 comes from the great Zig Ziglar. He said, you help enough people get what they want. You will

00:08:33.040 inevitably get what you want. But so many of you are focused on what you want, that you're willing

00:08:37.780 to railroad people and run over people and just leave this wake of collateral damage in your path

00:08:43.600 because you're worried about getting yours. So here's what I'd suggest to you. Stop worrying

00:08:48.140 about your damn self. Your needs are met. You're putting food on the table. The mortgage is being

00:08:55.260 paid. You have some experiences. You have some abundance and blessings in your life. Start

00:09:00.880 helping other people. Move from consumer to producer. How do I add value? How do I share?

00:09:08.520 How do I open up my network to other people? How do I give my wife what she wants? How do I help

00:09:13.160 my children with what they need? How do I give my time and energy and resources to other individuals?

00:09:19.040 And you know what's ironic about this? The more you focused on giving to other people,

00:09:24.600 the more you will get in return. It's a principle. It's an eternal principle. It works in every facet of

00:09:31.440 life. And now here's the beauty. You can take the stress off. There's no more stress about how am I

00:09:40.180 going to get rich and how I'm going to create a fulfilling relationship. Give. That's the answer.

00:09:46.640 Give. You want more love in your life? You don't feel loved. You want more love in your life? Start

00:09:50.900 giving love. Pick up the damn phone and text a friend who you haven't heard from in a while and say,

00:09:56.740 hey man, I was thinking about you. I haven't heard from you. Everything going okay? Pick up the phone

00:10:03.060 and call your wife. Maybe she's at work right now and just call her and say, hey, you know,

00:10:06.980 I just wanted to call and tell you I loved you. Period. That's it. Or send her flowers.

00:10:15.080 You want to connect with your kids? Ask your child. Hey, what do you want to do this afternoon when

00:10:19.920 you get home from school? Well, dad, I really like to play football, throw the football. Good. Go out

00:10:24.720 there and spend an hour. It doesn't take a lot. It's throwing the football. You want to get that

00:10:29.700 promotion at your work? Stop worrying about, well, this person did this and this person. How come I

00:10:34.600 didn't get, I got passed over? Add value. Look at the problems in your work. Maybe even the problems

00:10:41.600 outside of your purview, outside of your pay grade. And consider that maybe you have a solution or maybe

00:10:47.880 you have an introduction or maybe you have some insight and add that. Give that. How are you going

00:10:54.760 to be passed over for the promotion over the long haul? Like you might be short-term. And look,

00:11:00.340 guys, I've, I know, and here's what I would say is that I have at some time, and here's the downfall

00:11:05.520 of giving value, that at some points in my life, I feel slighted, right? Like I feel like I made an

00:11:12.260 introduction or I made a connection or I gave value in some way and I didn't get what I quote

00:11:18.100 unquote expected in return. And I felt slighted. A couple of things. Number one, short-term. I'm

00:11:24.260 playing the short-term because long-term I'm telling you it's going to work. No doubt, a hundred percent

00:11:29.000 guaranteed. The more you add value over the long-term it will work. Number two, don't keep score with

00:11:34.120 people. All right. You're not adding value so you can get in return because that's a consumptive

00:11:39.020 mindset. The only reason I'm giving value in my life is so you will get me more in return.

00:11:44.960 That's consumption disguised as adding value. You know what I'm talking about. You see these

00:11:50.380 sleazeball marketers, internet scam artists, used car salesmen, like you get it. Greasy, slimeball,

00:11:58.540 just manipulation. It's just gross. You see it and they say, well, I'm just adding value. I can't

00:12:04.880 leave. I'm just adding value. No, dude, you're adding value or at least attempting to, so you can

00:12:10.460 get in return and everybody can see through your bullshit. So here's what I would suggest to you.

00:12:15.800 Instead of adding value as a strategy, why not worry about being a good man?

00:12:22.520 Why not worry about caring about other people? Why not worry about helping other people win and thrive

00:12:30.040 and succeed? And then just know that over the longterm, it's all going to work out. It's all

00:12:36.000 going to pan out and it's all going to be okay. In fact, it's going to be better than okay.

00:12:42.740 Your results are going to magnify when you learn to add value. And this is the plague of society right

00:12:48.720 now. Everybody's worried about getting there. As you look at politicians, for example, they don't give

00:12:54.320 a shit about you. You know what they care about? Consumption. And their measure of consumption

00:13:00.120 is getting their little perks and their little kickbacks and all their little money and their

00:13:04.620 special interest groups paying them. And then to get reelected. You think those people care about

00:13:08.520 you? You're wrong. And yet you act just like them in your own capacity. You go to work and you say,

00:13:14.460 well, I'm just trying to help my client. Bullshit. You're just trying to make as much money as you can,

00:13:18.440 get the promotion, get the notoriety, and get rich. Not necessarily anything wrong with that,

00:13:24.660 but if that's your primary motive is to just get yours, you're never going to get yours to the degree

00:13:31.220 that you want. And you're never going to live a fulfilling life. You want to be happy. You want to

00:13:35.900 be fulfilled. You want to be satisfied. You want to live an enjoyable life. Worry about serving other

00:13:41.300 people. Give. Add value. Add to people's lives. Look for problems. Create the solutions and give

00:13:50.280 those freely and abundantly. Let's not play the scarcity mindset. Let's not play the short term.

00:13:56.160 Let's play the long term. And the more that men do this, and I'm talking about hundreds of thousands,

00:14:02.080 millions, tens of millions of guys stop worrying about getting their own and start worrying about

00:14:07.220 serving other people, the better off we're all going to be. This is the plague, at least one of

00:14:13.160 the plagues. There's another plague, and I'll talk about this later, which is the rise of fatherless

00:14:17.240 homes. We can talk about this, but this is a huge plague in society over consumption. Everything is so

00:14:24.740 easy to get. It's a problem. It's consuming you. Hence the word consumption. You don't have the mental

00:14:35.680 clarity, the mental focus, the physical space to worry about important things like serving your

00:14:41.700 wife and your kids and your colleagues and your coworkers and your clients and your neighbors and

00:14:45.800 your family members and the people that you care about and have a responsibility for. So guys, knock

00:14:50.640 it off with a consumption. Put the wallet away. Stop buying things. Stop worrying about getting yours.

00:14:58.620 Stop trying to manipulate people. Stop trying to just, you know, squeeze out every little dollar from a

00:15:03.620 client or prospect and just serve, just serve. And as other people are served, as Zig Ziglar would say,

00:15:11.800 then you will be served and you will inevitably get what you want, but that is not the motive.

00:15:17.120 The motive is to be a good and capable and moral and honorable man who's going to add value to people's

00:15:23.200 lives and going to make their environments better. All right, that's it off my soapbox. Guys, if you would,

00:15:29.720 on that note, please again, leave that rating and review. A lot of you guys are consuming the podcast

00:15:34.640 and I appreciate that. I want you to, but I also want you to give back and add value in a way that

00:15:39.800 you can do that. Again, is to leave that rating and review. Go out and share the message. Go to our

00:15:45.800 store, store.orderman.com. That's a great way to support us. Let's make this a reciprocal

00:15:49.820 relationship. I'll try to keep adding value to you. I would hope and ask that you do the same in return

00:15:54.520 and together we'll all be fulfilled and be better men and be able to serve our families

00:15:58.300 and our communities more effectively. All right, guys, we'll be back next week. Until then,

00:16:03.700 go out there, take action and become the man you are meant to be.

00:16:07.320 Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your life

00:16:11.820 and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.

Order of Man - October 29, 2021

The Plague of Overconsumption ｜ FRIDAY FIELD NOTES

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