Order of Man - The Power of Meritocracy, Conspiracies Debunked, and Elevating Our Standards ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

00:00:00.000 colleges are becoming less and less developed is because it's turned into an institution of

00:00:06.220 training people what to think, not how to think. And people say, well, it's always been. No, it

00:00:11.260 hasn't. Asking questions, having debates and thoughtful dialogue, challenging perception,

00:00:17.240 testing theories. We don't do that in those institutions to the degree that we even did

00:00:22.800 50 years ago. In the Enlightenment era, the Renaissance era, and trying to figure things

00:00:28.060 out and explore the arts and figure out and understand the cosmos and now it's like just

00:00:32.780 chat gpt tell me what it is kiff what's up man so great to see you i was actually up in your

00:00:39.140 neck of the woods uh this last weekend i didn't call you because i didn't want to talk with you

00:00:43.840 so other than that we had a pretty good pretty good time that's not true we were just it was

00:00:49.020 busy we were up for one day and back yeah i just gonna say that's when you don't post on social

00:00:53.740 media what you're doing so that that way no one goes what the hell yeah yeah oh for sure it's

00:00:59.380 funny because every once in a while i will i make a post where i am right and i might allude to where

00:01:04.020 i am or people will recognize where i am and they're like well how come you didn't call me i'm

00:01:07.700 like i do was i supposed to like i it's it's interesting because i do try to make calls and

00:01:17.840 reach out to people that i you know like who are in the area but life is busy everybody knows that

00:01:22.620 and it's funny because you're up here for a reason they get offended it's like wait i came

00:01:26.800 up for this plan not for that although it would have been nice so anyways we had a good time

00:01:31.880 we went to uh lacrosse the pll premier lacrosse league opening season uh in the salt lake city

00:01:39.460 area and the lacrosse is a great game i mean it is a great game if you're a guy and you're

00:01:46.340 listening to this and you don't have your kids involved in the lacrosse like you're just not

00:01:51.240 being a good dad that there's just no other way around it and i love it that's not entirely true

00:01:57.400 but kind of yeah and uh the pll is amazing the premier lacrosse league and what's cool about it

00:02:04.120 is they don't do it like other leagues where you know in the nfl you've got 30 teams or whatever

00:02:09.780 it is and they're all playing at different stadiums throughout the country lacrosse is so new

00:02:14.420 that all of the teams travel to cities together and they do two or three days worth of games

00:02:21.180 all the teams play that weekend so i think there was five or six games this games this weekend

00:02:26.760 and uh yeah we caught one and a half of them and then had to make a quick trip home so it's fun

00:02:32.560 it's a lot of fun so check it out premier lacrosse league it's amazing you know i've never seen a

00:02:36.920 professional lacrosse game right like um one of my older boys he played lacrosse but it'd be fun to

00:02:43.160 kind of pros do it to see the difference you know to me next probably cool yeah yeah it's it's it's

00:02:50.940 so interesting if you're not familiar with it it's part football part rugby part part soccer

00:02:56.440 part ice hockey part everything else football like it's it's everything all mixed into one

00:03:03.360 and it's very fast paced these guys are super athletic uh and basically you can beat the hell

00:03:09.460 out of each other with sticks, which is kind of fun too. Yeah. Yeah. That's awesome. Well,

00:03:14.760 we got something unique today. Do you want to introduce the listeners of what we're doing here?

00:03:19.180 So it might make sense. It might make sense. It might even just be a total flop. We'll, we'll see,

00:03:25.280 but you know, I like to mix it up and keep things interesting. And I figured, you know,

00:03:29.620 we're always so serious here on the podcast, so we can be, we can be light a little bit today.

00:03:34.760 uh what i thought would be funny is if if we just had people ask dumb questions and you know the 0.95

00:03:39.880 mantra there's no there's no stupid questions oh there are and you'll hear some today so uh our 0.90

00:03:46.880 goal our goal today is to try to give you actionable real and good advice on bad questions so 0.96

00:03:55.980 i don't know i thought it'd be fun we'll mix it up and see how it goes it'll be fun yeah don't

00:04:00.880 judge all these guys and their questions. We, we asked them to do this. Yeah. Because if anything,

00:04:05.940 you might, you might assume the iron councils made up of a bunch of dipwits, but no, we've

00:04:10.840 asked them to, um, to show up that way in this example. Exactly. Exactly. So yeah, we can get

00:04:16.780 it taken care of today. Well, this first question totally sets the tone here. I particularly grabbed

00:04:23.200 this one because I was like, Oh, that's hilarious. So Elijah Elliott, he says, after much study and

00:04:28.640 effort, I have finally learned how to kill my ego. Now I am better than everybody else. How can I

00:04:34.720 teach others to do the same without creating competition in this area? That's funny. Without

00:04:41.720 creating competition, that's funny too. Yeah, because he wants to see on top of it. Yeah.

00:04:46.060 Right. He's like, I don't want to create my competition and I am better than everybody else.

00:04:49.840 Okay. So in the spirit of what we talked about today, he said, this is a dumb question, right? 0.97

00:04:56.560 but we're going to give a real answer so here's a way to think about this i actually don't think

00:05:02.780 it's bad to think well of yourself and i there there is a trend in society where you're not

00:05:10.920 supposed to feel good about yourself you're not supposed to place yourself too highly above others

00:05:17.580 you're not supposed to be egocentric and ego-driven and i agree with all of that but what rarely gets

00:05:24.140 talked about is thinking well of yourself not highly of yourself but well of yourself and if

00:05:29.980 you do think well of yourself then you're going to do the right things that are going to help you

00:05:34.140 excel in certain aspects of your life so if you think well of yourself you're going to start

00:05:38.700 working out you're going to put down substances you're going to work diligently you're going to

00:05:45.040 communicate effectively you're going to develop new skills these are all things that you will do

00:05:50.800 because it's important that you think well of yourself and uh i think when you do that you are

00:05:56.300 going to rise to the top that's the inevitable outcome we live in believe it or not still

00:06:00.540 largely a meritocracy one thing i get frustrated about is there's a growing sentiment among

00:06:09.120 americans and i'm sure it's across the world as well um that we that that the people at the top

00:06:18.500 did it at the expense of others and while i certainly believe there are some exploitation

00:06:24.940 and there's some crony capitalism going on some corporatism is another thing you often hear which

00:06:32.520 is at odds with capitalism um i think for the most part the people who excel do so because

00:06:41.340 they're good at it and that just seems to me the natural order of things so that that's my answer

00:06:48.120 be good think well of yourself develop skills and yeah you will be better than other people

00:06:53.420 that's that's what's going to happen and then your job yeah is then to turn it around and help and

00:07:00.480 serve and push other people along and we often think well that'll create competition that's

00:07:06.040 actually a real sentiment people think that like i'm going to create my competition yeah maybe

00:07:11.080 maybe you are but i've had this belief that like a lot of people will ask me how do you build a

00:07:17.900 men's movement what can i do how can i grow this thing and i've always thought that there's two

00:07:22.200 kinds of people there's one person who will ask for help and not actually need it they'll figure

00:07:29.740 it out anyways whether you help them or not so you might as well help them because then you can

00:07:33.800 create an ally out of that person or you could give them your entire playbook step by step the

00:07:40.220 entire process and they're not going to do anything with the information anyways. So I don't

00:07:47.580 feel like you actually hurt yourself by sharing. There are certain ways of doing things that might

00:07:55.120 be proprietary. And I'm not saying you shouldn't protect your IP or intellectual property, but I

00:08:01.520 don't think it's harmful to share ideas and insight with people. I mean, that's never the problem,

00:08:07.480 right it's not like oh i mean i didn't have that idea no the barrier is the person the success is

00:08:14.600 more tied to the individual willing to do the work not really the person with the idea right i mean

00:08:19.620 let's be frank i mean just look around find a bunch of highly educated individuals that aren't

00:08:24.520 successful in life oh they didn't have the information no they had the information

00:08:28.060 they just have the discipline right or the work ethic necessary to push through

00:08:32.660 So what I love about this, Ryan, and let me ask your thoughts about this.

00:08:39.100 I think there's an element of this is like we shouldn't act this way.

00:08:42.540 And we might be happy with ourselves, right?

00:08:45.060 We might be like proud of ourselves and want to celebrate our wins, but we don't.

00:08:52.680 And we don't share it with people.

00:08:54.540 I've done that in my life.

00:08:55.760 I know a couple of people that I know that they're almost like don't share their wins with like family.

00:09:00.900 because they don't want their family they're managing the perceptions of of family and they're

00:09:07.780 not supposed to be happy for themselves and it's like it's really unfortunate right like we should

00:09:12.480 have people at our corner that we could go dude i'm so happy that i accomplished this thing and

00:09:17.960 be able to celebrate it and not just hide um you know some of our accomplishments not out of you

00:09:23.880 know thinking we're better than anybody but celebrating the wins i mean how how sad is it

00:09:28.720 that we, that we feel like we can't celebrate those things. What you're saying is part of the

00:09:34.460 reason why people don't, the other part of the reason is too many men and women don't have people

00:09:41.120 in their corner who would actually celebrate with them if they touted their accomplishments.

00:09:46.740 Yeah. In fact, if anything, they don't have good people in their corner. Those people would

00:09:51.320 be negative about it. They'd be negative. They'd be like, Oh, well, you know, it's easy to do that.

00:09:56.740 well it must like somebody runs a marathon and their friends like well yeah it must be nice to

00:10:01.360 have as much time as you need to be able to go run the marathon instead of actually celebrating

00:10:05.600 the fact that somebody did something pretty cool and and that would keep a person silent you get

00:10:11.160 enough criticism and pushback and people taking little pop shots and jabs from the cheap seats

00:10:17.900 then of course nobody's going to share so think about that when you're being a friend if a friend

00:10:22.640 comes to you and he's excited about how their daughter performed at a dance recital or how

00:10:28.080 they showed up for a marathon or they hit a PR at the gym or they got a belt advancement in martial

00:10:32.440 arts. Okay, that's awesome. Why are you threatened by that? Be excited for that person. Celebrate

00:10:37.820 with them. Be a good friend. The other thing that you were saying, which I thought was interesting

00:10:41.760 is, you know, when you were saying people have good ideas all the time is, you know, one thing

00:10:48.580 that I often consider is how many times have you been, you know, sitting watching TV or you look

00:10:54.840 at a billboard and you see this idea and you're like, I had that idea five years ago. And then

00:11:01.280 you complain about it. It's like, well, if you had the idea, it's not the idea. It's the speed

00:11:06.700 of implementation. So shame on you for having the idea five years ago and doing nothing about it.

00:11:13.920 And if you weren't in the position or something was more important, then great.

00:11:18.200 But don't complain about not doing anything with the idea.

00:11:21.220 Yeah.

00:11:21.440 Use it as a lesson.

00:11:23.440 Yeah.

00:11:23.700 In fact, it was funny.

00:11:25.060 Asia was asking me about what WeWork is.

00:11:27.620 She's like, what's WeWork?

00:11:28.840 What kind of building is a WeWork?

00:11:30.280 I was like, oh, it's a cool, cool working space that you rent out and you have these

00:11:34.800 offices and it has a common area.

00:11:36.740 And she's like, didn't you tell me about you had an idea, like a virtual office idea

00:11:42.960 like that like 20 years ago i'm like yeah yeah i'm like yeah yeah that was my idea that isn't

00:11:49.780 that cool you know and i'm like yeah it is what it is right you should have acted on it and i

00:11:54.140 actually started acting on it i was talking to an investor and i had this concept i was like

00:11:59.020 this co-working space where you just rent out the space and it's a monthly subscription and

00:12:03.700 you know what i mean and then you could tack on services you know on to renting your your 0.89

00:12:09.040 co-working location but um yeah kind of fun yeah yeah yeah all right next dumb question

00:12:15.420 elijah i hope that helps dustin stokes why do teenage boys act normal while fishing playing

00:12:23.340 sports but the minute you take them to target or a decent restaurant they immediately go loud

00:12:28.940 and feral feral oh i don't know that word actually that's not a feral like like um

00:12:35.240 wild natured like crazy like no like not civilized think of no manners the flies no manners or like

00:12:44.920 um the lost boys and peter pan like feral kids i think there's actually some some merit to letting

00:12:51.460 kids be feral you know one one person that comes to mind is john lovell with warrior poet society

00:12:57.600 he and his wife and family years ago came over to our place in maine and his kids are rowdy they're

00:13:03.500 rowdy and rambunctious and but they're also well-mannered and intelligent and thoughtful

00:13:07.780 yeah but he doesn't take that away from boys he lets them be feral in the right environment so

00:13:13.180 i actually think this is a this is not a dumb question this is actually a really good question

00:13:17.680 but it's true you know what why why don't boys want to sit down why don't boys want to color 0.83

00:13:23.240 within the lines i guess that's where it's dumb it's kind of like obvious isn't it like the fact

00:13:27.720 or or yeah well i don't i don't want to do those things as a grown man right let alone a child 0.92

00:13:34.100 anyways the reason is is because we want to be rowdy we want to be rambunctious we want to burn

00:13:41.580 up energy and we want to do things that are fun and enjoyable going to target is about the most

00:13:46.420 miserable thing that you can you can do so yeah i don't know i don't see i think our

00:13:52.480 I think our kids are more tactical than we give them credit.

00:13:56.940 They might be better behaved while at home and while fishing.

00:14:00.700 And they know damn well that once you're in a public setting,

00:14:04.180 mom and dad aren't going to come down as hard on us.

00:14:06.880 And so we're going to be a little more rowdier in a public setting than not.

00:14:13.540 I really do think they do that.

00:14:15.540 And that's why you have to be consistent.

00:14:19.200 If you discipline them at home for acting up,

00:14:22.480 and you're in a public setting at a Walmart and they throw a fit, you leave them throwing a fit

00:14:28.340 in the middle of the hallway and you, and you, and you deal with it then. And don't sway on

00:14:34.280 your standards. Otherwise those little suckers will take advantage of it. That's what I think. 1.00

00:14:38.760 Yeah, that's a good point. I hadn't considered that, but you're probably true. You know,

00:14:42.160 what's always funny is, is women will sometimes complain about their husbands not helping out 0.99

00:14:48.400 around the house or whatever and the one that always killed me was when they get mad at you 0.97

00:14:53.780 for not getting as many dishes in the dishwasher as you could like you're not as efficient as 1.00

00:14:59.580 possible and so you fill up the the dishwasher the wrong way apparently and then a woman will

00:15:05.380 get mad at you for doing it because you didn't do it perfectly or to her standard and basically

00:15:11.840 you're just training us to do it wrong so you'll do it which is so awesome it's like hey i'm not

00:15:16.560 doing it right show me how to do it and then she does it you're like good and then you get to leave

00:15:20.480 and not have to worry about doing the dishes totally yeah your kids have you had that experience

00:15:25.900 what is it about women in the in the dishwasher what what have you had that experience not at

00:15:31.540 all i'm i'm master dishwasher uh loader yeah i got a master's degree in that so i don't know what

00:15:37.620 it is but it seems like women for some reason get really bothered that you got two fewer cups

00:15:43.600 in the dishwasher than you otherwise could have it's hilarious to me yeah that's funny all right

00:15:48.680 matt batucci uh he gave us three questions i'm gonna pick one uh you know we could go with flat

00:15:56.420 earth have we stepped on the moon or how were the pyramids built oh let's see flat earth stepped on

00:16:02.540 the moon i mean flat earth is probably the dumbest argument out there for sure for sure like how are

00:16:09.120 pyramids are you questioning the moon no no i don't know we landed on the moon 100 okay how 0.92

00:16:15.840 about how about pyramids um and that wild like when i a not aliens no but can we i don't know

00:16:25.580 it just seems wild that they were built it seems so unpractical i i need someone to use system

00:16:31.560 simple systems to recreate a pyramid for me to feel confident that we can pull this off if you

00:16:38.740 have i don't i don't know how long it took to build the pyramids but if you have decades let's

00:16:43.200 say or centuries true to build something and you have an infinite supply of slave labor that you

00:16:50.740 don't care about it seems pretty realistic to me that that could take place over that that time

00:16:58.220 frame but you know what's interesting so i don't know i don't i haven't studied the pyramid thing

00:17:02.800 because it's really not that fast i mean pyramids are pretty fascinating but i don't really need to

00:17:07.280 get hung up on how they're built but sit when you talk about simple systems or simple machines right

00:17:12.980 you have a lever and you have a screw or plane i don't i don't know them all but you've got all

00:17:17.540 these the six simple machines what's interesting is when i was in maine there was this big huge

00:17:24.180 huge uh iron fireplace and it was in the barn and we needed i needed to move it and i had no idea i

00:17:36.280 like me and the boys tried to pick it up i had other people try to help me or whatever and we

00:17:40.480 had this guy ben this neighbor and he's one of those guys who is very handy knows how to do

00:17:47.820 everything knows how to fix everything can figure out any problem very good neighbor to have so i

00:17:54.440 call him up i'm like ben i gotta move this thing it's like a thousand pounds i don't know how to

00:17:59.200 move this damn uh fireplace and he's like oh i don't know it's easy no problem i'm like okay

00:18:05.420 easy and he comes over and he's got these he's got uh these uh i can't remember if they were pvc 0.96

00:18:13.420 if it was pvc pipe or if it was uh like steel pipe something it was like steel pipe pvc and

00:18:23.280 then he had this big circular cylinders yeah and so i'm like okay like what do i have to pry this

00:18:29.660 up he's like well no the way we're gonna do it is we're actually gonna use part of this as a

00:18:35.160 lever to lift the front up and then I'm going to slide this board and then we're going to lift

00:18:38.140 the back up and we're going to push it onto this board. I'm like, well, that's great. What do we do

00:18:41.540 with it once it's on the board? Now, instead of being on the floor, it's on the board. And he's

00:18:45.620 like, well, we're going to put one of these rods under the board before we get it on there.

00:18:49.120 So we do. And we push, we just roll the wood up onto the rod, the first one. And then as we're

00:18:55.400 pushing, we take, there's probably five rods and we take the back rod and put it around the front

00:18:59.980 back rod, put it around the front back rod, put it around the front. We turned it, moved it. It

00:19:03.460 was like a feather and it was just this simple lever and a little bit of you know pushing and

00:19:11.720 that's it so it's pretty interesting what you can do and i think that is at least one of the ideas

00:19:18.020 of how the pyramids were built is is that way yeah so you know what's also interesting about

00:19:24.760 you know history that that comes up when i think about you know pyramids is we always assume that

00:19:32.820 civilization or man was dumber than we are isn't that funny we always assume that we're like we're

00:19:41.440 the most intellectual version and it's like what are we like you're just talking about simple 0.95

00:19:46.160 systems how many of us know those versus back then how many people knew those are we really

00:19:55.060 smarter i don't know our intelligence is built upon framework upon framework upon framework it's

00:20:03.100 like and we take credit for it like for instance i'm like oh well my generation we we invented the 0.98

00:20:09.540 internet and the telephone no no i didn't someone else did i have no idea how that shit works 0.95

00:20:16.100 am i really smarter or am i just riding the coattails of of my generation and and lumping 0.91

00:20:23.180 myself with all of their intelligence you know yeah i mean i think i think it's hard to compare

00:20:31.300 the type of intelligence you're talking about though right yeah like if they survived yeah

00:20:36.960 exactly and so they were worried about staying warm and not getting eaten by a dinosaur or

00:20:44.580 whatever right we've we've evolved past that as a species not like i have evolved because if i was

00:20:51.140 thrust into that environment i wouldn't survive very long i might survive a little more than the

00:20:55.900 next guy but not very long um yeah but that's a different kind of intelligence because if you take

00:21:02.260 that person and you put them on the street today they're going to get run over by a car in two

00:21:06.300 seconds so you know what i mean so it's hard to compare that type of intelligence but i actually

00:21:13.760 I think you bring up a good point because having, having some basic knowledge and like Ben,

00:21:21.260 the ability to figure things out to me is a better skillset than actually knowing the answer.

00:21:28.800 Would you agree with that? Like being able to figure out the answer is better than actually

00:21:32.980 knowing the answer. Absolutely. I mean, this is, yeah, I talked about this on our all call

00:21:40.060 are all all hands meeting on Friday. Like if there's one thing I gained through a weird

00:21:45.220 childhood, it is the ability to figure it out. And, and I think that has probably been more

00:21:51.960 beneficial to success in my life than probably any other thing more than a college degree and

00:21:58.540 everything else is my ability to figure it out. Well, and I think that's part of the reason why

00:22:04.640 colleges are becoming less and less relevant is because it's turned into an institution of

00:22:11.040 training people what to think not how to think and people say well it's always been no it hasn't

00:22:16.900 the socratic method asking questions having debates and thoughtful dialogue challenging

00:22:22.840 perception testing theories we don't do that in those institutions to the degree that we even did

00:22:29.460 50 years ago, let alone 500 years ago. Everybody was questioning and curious in the Enlightenment

00:22:36.440 era and the Renaissance era and trying to figure things out and explore the arts and figure out

00:22:42.260 and understand the cosmos. And now it's like, just chat GPT, tell me what it is. And it's useful.

00:22:48.980 I mean, I use chat or Claude now mostly, but I use AI every single day at this point. It's useful,

00:22:54.520 but it has stripped our ability to figure some things out and that's unfortunate and it might

00:22:59.740 come back to bite us in the bud if if things go south it could be really bad yeah for a lot of

00:23:06.900 people yeah very quickly yeah i always think of this as in the space of programming right so

00:23:14.360 software developers back in the day when you wrote a program you were riding against zeros and ones

00:23:21.420 right a pulse of power a surge of power was a one the absence is a zero right machine language

00:23:29.160 that's the low one of the lowest levels of programming and then once we built an operating

00:23:34.700 system now when i developed code i wasn't developing code against a processor and memory

00:23:40.220 i was writing code on top of an operating system and the operating system would write

00:23:45.780 to the hardware and then microsoft would come along and say okay microsoft's going to build the

00:23:51.060 dot net framework. Now I'm coding within the framework and the framework is, is integrated

00:23:57.540 with the operating. And now, now my programming is five levels removed from operating directly

00:24:05.580 with machine. Great. I'm more efficient until the things that I've developed my skill on time,

00:24:13.340 that those frameworks, if they ever fail on me, I'm hosed. Definitely. Right. Definitely. And,

00:24:20.680 and so that's, that's the danger is we become dependent on the frameworks that we have,

00:24:25.380 right? Can we make a fire? Oh, most people. Absolutely. I know how to use a match, right?

00:24:31.500 I can use a lighter. Okay. You take that framework away. Can you make a fire? All of a sudden we

00:24:37.820 have grown men that go, um, I can't make a fire. I have no way to make a fire. Those are just,

00:24:44.960 you know, so they're beneficial, but we also become dependent on the frameworks.

00:24:48.940 yeah yeah yeah i mean it's even even when you think about a fire right it's like three elements

00:24:54.980 okay so i need three elements i need i need heat i need fuel and i need oxygen okay then that's how

00:25:02.520 you make a fire you put those things together in the right quantities in the right order and and

00:25:08.000 you do that there's an interesting scene in martian with matt williams matt no matt williams

00:25:13.480 what's the name matt damon why do you say matt williams matt damon um and he he's basically

00:25:21.540 stranded on mars and he wants to figure out a way to create fire and then to create water and he's

00:25:28.420 like all right what is water okay it's two parts hydrogen one part oxygen where can i get that from

00:25:33.760 and so he like figures it out it's actually kind of fascinating because it explores that uh explores

00:25:38.620 that concept there's another thing i wanted to say about the conspiracy and conspiracy thing

00:25:43.200 because well one the moon thing is always interesting people say we never landed on the

00:25:47.460 moon it's like do you know how many people across all countries including including our our enemies

00:25:55.560 would need to be in on the idea that we never went to the moon like how many thousands and

00:26:01.240 thousands of people would need to be involved in a cover-up like that so that's part of it 0.80

00:26:05.540 and then of course the flatter thing is dumb okay so when when there's conspiracies i think

00:26:11.680 you have to consider really two things number one what's the motive why why like the flat earth 0.89

00:26:18.000 thing what is the motive give me a reason why we would be led to believe it has to be a reason

00:26:23.620 globe right like yeah what would be the point of lying on a grand scale to everybody that the earth

00:26:30.140 is a is a disc instead of a globe so there's that the motive now i can understand the space program

00:26:37.060 because it might be money laundering which is you know something to consider the nasa program has

00:26:43.200 been widely criticized as being a money laundering machine and maybe that's the case uh of course we

00:26:48.280 were in a race with the soviet union and so we wanted to beat that and that builds patriotism

00:26:52.860 and pride in the u.s and production goes up and so i can understand that so there is motive with

00:26:57.920 that one motive and then how the complexity of the conspiracy the more people that would need

00:27:04.160 to be involved, the less likely it's a conspiracy. So yeah, take that for what it's worth. That's

00:27:09.960 my thought on conspiracies. I love it. All right. Alan Placer, why aren't women allowed in the iron

00:27:16.000 council? We're the, the woman, the, the he-man woman hater club. That's why. Yes. Is that a, 1.00

00:27:23.520 is that little rascals? The he-man woman hater club? No, no girls allowed. Yeah. I think so.

00:27:27.200 Yeah. Yep. Um, you know, here, look, there's an actual reason above the obvious. Like this is a

00:27:33.440 space for men to be able to have these conversations but guys you can't honestly say and i know he's

00:27:38.980 joking and he knows why but you can't say or even make the argument and there's people who do and 0.83

00:27:45.020 i'll give you an example of this that once a woman enters the dynamic the dynamic shifts

00:27:50.640 it starts with men it starts turning into posturing and starts turning into beating of 1.00

00:27:57.840 chest and it starts turning into competition it also means that because of posturing i can't be

00:28:04.320 completely honest like i might be able to be just with you kip because of that dynamic between men

00:28:10.020 and women so i think it's pretty obvious which is why it's a dumb question but there's a real reason

00:28:15.580 that men need exclusively male spaces because i need to be able to talk to you in a way where we

00:28:23.580 resonate. And a woman might come in and say, well, you guys are being jerks to each other. 0.99

00:28:27.380 It's like, what are you talking about? You know, maybe I was giving you a hard time or busting your 1.00

00:28:32.280 your balls about, you know, something you did or didn't do. And a woman's going to be offended by 1.00

00:28:37.020 that. But a man's kind of laughing and he's like, yeah, yeah, you're right. As long as the trust is

00:28:41.180 built up. So yeah. And sometimes, well, when I said people think that a lot of things should be

00:28:50.880 co-ed that's true like think about the boy scouts women ruined boy scouts and we let it happen 1.00

00:28:58.360 we let it happen because if if a boy said can we go to girl scouts girls would be like no 0.89

00:29:05.980 and then we just accept it as the way but when girls say can we go to boy scouts we say oh sure

00:29:13.560 we'll make an exception for that and it's that double standard that created a problem that ruined

00:29:19.280 a fantastic organization instead of what what should have happened was the boy scouts of 0.99

00:29:26.480 america should have said no there's no change there's no women here exactly or create a new

00:29:32.600 program but no we're not changing our standard ironically they did it and and the ceo or the

00:29:40.480 yeah the ceo of the organization is on record as saying hey we did this because our numbers were

00:29:47.380 dwindling that's why they did that and ironically and it backfired made it worse solution to the

00:29:53.900 problem exacerbated the problem you you don't diminish the same thing happened in the united

00:30:01.220 states military under uh biden our recruitment numbers were atrocious and so what did we do 1.00

00:30:07.540 well let's be more welcoming let's let's get rid of the the humble sexual

00:30:11.820 lower the requirement let's let's make a different standard for women and let's let transgenders in

00:30:18.940 and let's make it all inclusive and let's talk about how they can find themselves not serve a

00:30:23.780 higher mission and a purpose and so numbers dwindled pete hegseth department of war comes in

00:30:29.520 says no we're gonna have one standard we're gonna do it this way we're gonna improve morale by saying

00:30:35.320 you're coming into an organization to learn how to be a contributing member of that organization

00:30:39.240 not find yourself and this is how it's going to be run and now you can look at the stark contrast

00:30:45.240 of recruitment numbers in a very short period of time and to be able to trans to be able to

00:30:52.340 transfer or or change the trajectory of recruitment in the military in a matter of one and a half

00:30:57.580 years just goes to show you that the higher the standard the better the organization will be

00:31:04.380 maybe we see it we see it even in the iron council we have team leaders who make exceptions for guys

00:31:10.340 who aren't pulling their weight not adhering to the standard operating procedures not being

00:31:14.400 contributing members of their team because they're worried well if if i get get after him he'll leave

00:31:19.940 and then the team will dwindle oh yeah well what's going to happen if you let underperformance take

00:31:24.940 place who's going to leave the team the performers yeah and it's going to start with the performers

00:31:31.280 because the high performance guys are like, I don't, I don't want to be in a team like this.

00:31:36.500 Like I want to be pushed. I want to be motivated. I want to be inspired by guys who are getting

00:31:40.700 after it. And so you're like, I'm out and they go find a different team. So standard is the way.

00:31:46.760 Excellent. Well, and, and in the, in the subject of standard, uh, we have a preview call actually

00:31:53.220 for the iron council men only, by the way, uh, to learn more about the preview call, uh, the

00:31:58.960 theironcouncil.com slash preview that's may 19th at 8 p.m eastern time so we kind of pull back the

00:32:05.580 curtains a little bit learn about the iron council once again may 19th 8 p.m to register go to the

00:32:11.760 ironcouncil.com slash preview yes sir all right zach zamick this is funny why is carrying all

00:32:20.500 the groceries into the house in one trip. So satisfying truth. It's just a, it's just an

00:32:28.800 exhibitor of your capability. It's like, I can do it. I was actually, I was on the phone. This

00:32:35.220 is kind of funny. I was on the phone with my mom yesterday cause it was mother's day. And so I

00:32:39.840 wanted to call her and we had a good conversation and I can't remember why we got talking about it,

00:32:43.600 but we were actually talking about space travel. I don't know how we got down that route, but we

00:32:47.580 did and she had made the comment she's like well why why are we like going into space because i was

00:32:53.420 talking about colonizing the moon which is part of the goal of the artemis program and she was

00:32:58.540 asking about what why are we doing that and i said to her would you have asked the same question if

00:33:03.600 you were sitting in the court when christopher columbus was petitioning for money from the

00:33:07.440 spanish government and she's like no i guess with the information i have now i guess i would not

00:33:13.560 have questioned that i'm like yeah exactly like we because we can is the answer because we can

00:33:19.220 that's it yeah so why carry all the groceries in because you can or if you can't then you want to

00:33:25.320 see if you can because everything with men is a competition as it should be even if you're just

00:33:29.940 competing with yourself yeah it's a sense of accomplishment isn't that ironic that there's

00:33:35.440 this innate desire in us to go can i do it can i be better yeah it's good thing you know ironically 0.92

00:33:41.820 interesting maybe not ironically but interestingly enough this is one area where women are actually 1.00

00:33:48.980 pretty good when it comes to the physical standard is to be able to carry all the groceries in with 1.00

00:33:54.480 one thing and then it's funny she's she'll like text you and say hey can I get help with the 0.99

00:33:59.180 groceries and you're like yeah and you put the shoes on and you go outside and she's like never

00:34:02.020 mind I got it and it took you like 60 seconds and she already has the baby in one arm with her

00:34:07.740 what i call her gorilla arm and she's got the rest of the groceries in one hand and she's 1.00

00:34:12.960 bothered that it took you 60 seconds to get out there but she's getting after you're like babe

00:34:17.360 you're fully capable you got this let me get the door for you yeah totally you know what's funny

00:34:23.100 is i i've got a couple of friends who are chiropractors and um i some of the conversations

00:34:28.540 i have are so random because i like talking about weird shit but they could they can actually tell

00:34:34.240 when a woman comes in to get adjusted or to get fixed or whatever, they can tell which hand 0.95

00:34:40.440 they held the baby with. Yeah. Because of the way their, well, their arm, but also the way that

00:34:47.240 their hips shift, their hips and their spine shift. So it's kind of interesting. Yeah. Any

00:34:52.680 good parent, you eventually learned that the strength of holding a kid for a long time is just

00:34:59.320 settling them on the hip. That's, that's the secret. You learned kind of how to,

00:35:03.960 how to holster them on your hip. Yeah. That's what you need. Like a baby holster. You just put

00:35:09.740 the baby in. Well, they kind of have them right, but they're on the front of the, in the back,

00:35:13.300 I guess is the same. Yeah. Maybe like a little shelf for them to sit on that's attached onto

00:35:17.780 the side, like a strap over and it's just got like a little bench right there. And you're like,

00:35:21.380 just sit there and be quiet. Totally. Yeah. You know, it's funny. I saw this meme. Um,

00:35:27.400 and it's like, uh, how, you know, a mom or a dad trains jujitsu and it's, it's when they have a

00:35:33.100 five on five gable grip when they're holding their kid. And I'm like, that is truth. That's so true.

00:35:40.320 Yeah. So look for that. If you see five on five, you're like, ah, they train because you learned

00:35:45.280 that's way more efficient. I have a funny, okay. So I have a question about that. So

00:35:49.780 I don't actually know the answer to this. I mean, I do know inherently what it is,

00:35:54.560 but it's kind of an interesting thought because when you're talking about a gable grip if you

00:35:59.620 guys don't know what that is like put your hands opposite diagonal and just like clap right but

00:36:06.160 you're not locking your thumb around your your fingers it's just like that um no cease but it's

00:36:13.020 weird to me like when you're doing let's say an americana for example somebody who's never trained

00:36:18.720 before will put their hand their thumb and their fingers entirely around the other person's wrist

00:36:25.780 but we're trained to put like cup over it right yeah it's the proper way to do it why is that the

00:36:32.060 case and why is a gable grip stronger than actually clasping yeah because you're not you're not

00:36:39.620 gripping this c a c grip like this gets you so they so you're trying to control on both sides

00:36:48.480 if you really think about a kimura grip you're gripping this so you can leverage

00:36:53.880 you can pull it it's actually the leverage of popping the wrist up that is in the is the power

00:37:00.540 of it not in controlling the wrist so you get more you have more leverage with all five fingers

00:37:08.380 because you misunderstand right like people would look at and go oh you're controlling the wrist no

00:37:12.680 no you're creating leverage against the wrist you're not trying to control the wrist it's all

00:37:17.460 in control anyway because of your back muscles and then you pulling it in you know what i mean

00:37:21.740 so it's really fascinating you know what the other grip is it's this that's the other one for

00:37:26.120 oh the wrist i don't know what this is called right when you when you latch onto the side of

00:37:30.700 the hand but well it is interesting because also you're not trying to control the wrist from coming

00:37:36.880 in in fact if anything if you want to bring your wrist closer to me go ahead sure good yeah make

00:37:41.960 it worse yeah yeah exactly well okay so but why the gable grip then instead of actually like

00:37:47.160 clasping your thumbs why is that that doesn't seem well i don't know what it is it just it's

00:37:52.980 tighter yeah yeah it's tighter i i i think you can you get better leverage with with all five

00:38:00.140 you must be able to have more muscle yeah yeah interesting that's fascinating that is all right

00:38:05.840 that is a funny point so either either the gable grip or cauliflower ear just stay away from people

00:38:10.580 yeah yeah just watch those two groups yeah um will pinnell what is your guilty pleasure movie

00:38:17.540 and or song oh um what's a guilty pleasure movie like a movie that you'd watch over and over

00:38:25.840 i mean it would be easy for me to give like real answers like real answers would be like

00:38:30.780 oh braveheart it's like okay you know or or something by guns and roses like welcome to

00:38:36.380 the jungle maybe but i don't really consider that a guilty pleasure because isn't that what every guy

00:38:41.860 likes you know or metallica or something like that but um as far as songs go i don't i don't

00:38:49.040 listen to a lot of music so there's not something like some secret song i have hidden by like taylor

00:38:54.280 swift that i don't want anybody to know about but i will say this okay i'll give in the spirit of

00:39:01.240 having a little fun today i'm gonna give you two chick flicks that i actually like that's fun okay

00:39:08.400 all right so two chick flicks um i'm a little hesitant to say this because i might lose my

00:39:14.540 man card but i actually like these two movies so here it is number one is the holiday that one is

00:39:21.820 with uh what's her name the titanic woman what's what's her name kate winslet and cameron diaz

00:39:29.180 and jude law so the holiday are you taking notes you're you're literally taking notes right now

00:39:34.240 i'm not recording well i'm trying to figure out the movie that i like okay you do that so the

00:39:40.300 holiday is one and the other one is love actually and that's also a holiday movie but those are

00:39:47.400 those are two chick flicks that i i could actually sit and watch so there you go a little bit about

00:39:54.020 me that you didn't know before love actually actually came to my mind what's the other one

00:40:00.340 with the guy from the office and his wife divorces him and he hires like a dating coach

00:40:07.820 yeah with uh ryan gosling yes freaking hilarious i love that movie that is good ryan gosling steve 0.96

00:40:16.160 corral crazy stupid love yes i i i would watch that movie over and over again yeah and i don't

00:40:24.160 think that's really a chick flick but that's a good that's a funny movie that's a good movie 0.96

00:40:27.760 it's funny yeah for sure yeah you know yeah good no keep going okay if you got something else um

00:40:35.220 no no i don't i mean i was gonna it's fun covering the the chick flicks so that's we'll leave it as

00:40:42.240 that you know the i was gonna say the older i get the less i care about looking cool i'm like yeah

00:40:47.480 i like that yeah i like that i'm not supposed to like that but i do i'm not supposed to do that

00:40:52.480 but i do and you know i don't care there's there's some power in just becoming an old grumpy man where

00:40:59.400 you're like i don't care i don't care about people's feelings i don't care about you know

00:41:04.200 like what people are complaining about that that's why clint eastwood is just just kind of my spirit 0.68

00:41:10.880 animal like he doesn't give a shit totally about anyone or anything like yep we all kind of like 0.88

00:41:16.800 that mentality and you get away with it as you get older and so i'm looking forward i'm looking 0.98

00:41:22.340 forward to be a grumpy old man that says things that i shouldn't say just so i can take advantage

00:41:28.040 of it i mean i've already started doing things like when i drop my daughter off sometimes at

00:41:33.400 at the high school because she she's homeschooled and she goes to public school at the same time so

00:41:38.840 we have this crazy schedule and sometimes I have to drop her off when school's already started.

00:41:43.540 So there's people around, you know what I mean? Yeah. And I'll drop her off and I'll roll down

00:41:48.480 the window. I'd be like, I love you. Choose the right. Jesus loves you. You know what I mean?

00:41:54.140 Just try to embarrass her. You know what I mean? Yeah. And it's fun. Yeah. It's fun. 0.98

00:41:59.620 Yeah. All right. I like stuff like that, man. It's yeah. But being a grumpy old, old man and

00:42:05.000 what's funny about old old men and women too is they are so racist and it's i'm sorry it's

00:42:11.620 hilarious to me like the things they say i'm like grandma you can't say that anymore i won't even

00:42:18.960 repeat what my grandparents and grandmas and grandpas said and they're like what what's wrong

00:42:24.120 with that i'm like oh my goodness they don't even know it's it's hilarious to me anyways yeah yeah

00:42:30.880 my grandpa, he was, he was in that category. Yeah. All right. Mike and Darfur, you never hear

00:42:38.060 a woman say, hold my beer and watch this yet. I suspect every guy has life experience with this 1.00

00:42:44.440 phrase. Why? Oh, I think it goes back to the competent. I think it's just like, it's goes

00:42:50.960 back to the competition. It's like, Oh, fun. Right. You jump. Yeah. It's like you jumped over

00:42:55.660 that fence cool you jump i could i could jump twice as high over that fence like hold this watch 0.59

00:43:01.700 and then you know we fall on our face and do something dumb and i was talking with a friend

00:43:06.580 i won't disclose who it is but he'll probably be listening to this and he said that he threw

00:43:10.940 his back out i'm like how'd you throw your back out he's like putting my socks on and it's like

00:43:16.580 i get speaking of getting older like i was i was walking the other day i got up in the morning and

00:43:22.520 i was kind of hobbling around a little my son's like what happened what'd you do i'm like i slept

00:43:27.620 like that's literally all i did i just slept and my i woke up my back hurt so it's like what is

00:43:34.820 happening here but no i think okay so but the real question is do women have the equivalent

00:43:41.960 i think they do yeah is it dangerous though or is it the equivalent of like

00:43:49.680 not dangerous, but courageous or no, it's, it's usually like it has, I think with women,

00:43:59.280 it has more to do with beauty than for men. It has more to do with utility. So for example,

00:44:05.700 if I see you in a cool shirt, I'm not going to come out tomorrow and wear like a cooler shirt.

00:44:10.800 Cause I don't care. But if I see you do something cool, like jump over that fence, I'm like, well,

00:44:16.540 let me see if i can jump higher or further and that's utilitarian for men good point but for

00:44:22.260 women i think it's more because that's what we that's what that's why we're valued right men

00:44:27.720 are valued in circles of men and circles of women for being utilitarian so we naturally gravitate

00:44:34.740 towards something that's going to show some sort of capacity but i think women are generally more 0.67

00:44:39.780 valued for what beauty and vitality right yeah good so their competition revolves around 1.00

00:44:46.800 think about makeup why do women wear makeup so they look better than the other woman 1.00

00:44:51.180 why do they wear bras push-up bras padded bras so they look more voluptuous than the other woman 0.98

00:44:57.560 and then they'll see a woman in a dress and they're like she looks horrible in that dress 0.94

00:45:03.640 and then they're wearing the neck the same dress the next week to church and it's like see i can

00:45:08.620 pull it off so i think women do the same thing it's just built on what they're valued for and i

00:45:16.140 know that strip that's a little bit yeah i mean socially valued for let's say it that way maybe

00:45:21.800 i mean you understand what like people i like there's always going to be people who are going

00:45:25.780 to be like women aren't just valued for beauty i'm not saying that but i'm saying that in

00:45:30.220 human evolution we look at women for vitality and and youth and the ability to to rear children and

00:45:37.960 and, and everybody looks at men as the protectors and the utility utilitarians. It's just, it is

00:45:43.100 what it is. Like you can cry about it or just accept it. Yeah, totally. Yeah. I was sharing

00:45:48.400 this story. I don't know why. Well, I shared it at the main event. You know, it's like, I remember

00:45:53.860 as a kid being in the back of the farm and we're like building ramps and we're like, let's clear

00:45:58.500 this ramp. And before you know it, it's like, let's put shingles with nails pushed through it

00:46:04.660 between the two ramps so that way if you don't make it you die you know it's like i have no idea

00:46:10.560 why we would do that right but you know just boys are crazy yeah we are man it's that's and it never

00:46:17.900 goes away right it never goes away i mean yeah i was at when i was telling you this weekend that

00:46:23.300 the pll it's kind of funny it's a rowdy crowd i would say it's different than kind of like soccer

00:46:28.980 a little bit more like soccer although i haven't seen the level of vitriol towards the opposing

00:46:35.880 team in it but like um in hostility so it gets a little rowdy but if you ever go to like a soccer

00:46:43.560 game you run the risk of being murdered just because the other team beat your team like

00:46:50.900 that sounds crazy but it's true and you got to think or at least getting into a fight and if

00:46:57.540 there's alcohol involved even more so so now you get a bunch of rowdy men who are very competitive

00:47:04.540 by nature they probably played sports to some degree when they were growing up you get them

00:47:09.460 filled with a bunch of alcohol and you get them to to wear jerseys to signify what part of the

00:47:16.220 tribe or what tribe they're in and then you say hey let's be civil about this like come on like

00:47:22.420 how is that gonna work but it's pretty wild tribalism is a crazy thing that's funny all

00:47:29.260 right jay lowry what is the proper way for a man to shake a woman's hand limp wrist style or firm

00:47:36.160 oh firm for sure well it depends if if you want her to be your friend you might go limp 0.57

00:47:43.800 if you want to play the gay card i mean that's true yeah if if you want her to be a significant

00:47:51.460 another yeah there is the that is true and there is the there is always that one guy who plays

00:47:57.220 plays soft in order to get the girl i'm like dude that's not gonna work you're not gonna get laid

00:48:02.700 like she's yeah i don't know man i've heard i've heard crazy statistics i i've heard i don't know 0.58

00:48:09.060 this is we're going off the reservation here but i i've heard gay guys probably get more play with

00:48:15.760 their friends that are girls than straight guys do that i've actually heard that but i don't know

00:48:19.860 if that's true I don't know man I don't I don't know women let us know yeah I mean I'd be curious

00:48:26.280 now but not curious like that way I'm not saying that but oh what do you mean what do you mean

00:48:31.040 curious like how curious um no firm of course firm right and I've actually had I've had don't

00:48:40.860 break her hand hold out her hand like this and like to like give her your fingers have you ever

00:48:47.300 had this happen no where they like kiss her hand no not kiss to like shake her hand but like

00:48:54.780 almost like a pincher claw like like not a handshake but she'll like go like this and kind of

00:49:00.140 and i actually move her hand and like shake her hand and i'll and and in one case in particular

00:49:08.120 i'm like that's weird and i actually grabbed her hand and shook it like you're really supposed to

00:49:12.900 shake a person's hand. So some, sometimes you'll have a woman who's like, and I don't know if

00:49:18.700 she's trying to be feminine or delicate or she's just weird, but no shake her hand firmly. And 0.68

00:49:24.320 don't, by the way, do the same thing with men. You should apply the same pressure in your handshake

00:49:29.520 to women as you do men. And so if I come up to you and I shake your hand, but I try to crush your

00:49:34.880 hand, I immediately think less of you immediately. Yeah. I'm like, what is this guy trying to prove?

00:49:41.300 like this hot head like what is this a comp this is a competition how strong you can shake my hand

00:49:46.720 what are you doing so true so just give give a man and a woman the same firmness of a handshake

00:49:54.260 and i had a guy one time this is crazy i can't even remember who it was it was a pretty

00:50:00.840 notable author and i was at an event and he spoke and he did a nice job as far as i remember

00:50:07.580 and then i saw him out in the foyer of the the conference center or something where we were

00:50:12.820 and i went up to him like hey i really enjoyed your presentation and i went to extend my hand

00:50:18.660 as a normal human being does and he like like put his finger like his finger in my palm and i'm like 0.55

00:50:27.960 what do you want me to shake what are we fuck are we doing here and i'm like 0.77

00:50:34.600 like i was like i don't even know how i responded but i was probably like 0.97

00:50:40.180 oh like what and he's like thanks and then he walked off i'm like that's weird that was weird

00:50:46.740 yeah so don't ruin a first impression by having a bad handshake and then and then i'll here's a

00:50:52.540 great story for judgment. So we, we had a neighborhood, um, we invite some neighbors over

00:50:58.240 for like lunch or something. And, um, husband and wife are there. I'm meeting them for the first

00:51:06.620 time. I meet his wife. I'm like, Hey, nice to meet you. I'm so-and-so right. And back and forth,

00:51:11.160 I go up to the husband and I say, Hey, my name's Kip Sorensen. He goes, Oh, hi, my name is so,

00:51:15.880 it's so-and-so and i put my hand out and he just stands there

00:51:20.060 like he doesn't put his hand out to shake my hand and he's like yeah i literally put my hand out 0.99

00:51:29.220 and he goes nice to meet you and he didn't extend his hand in me and i was like what a dick like i 0.96

00:51:35.480 was instantly like dude what a punk like so much i was kind of like fired up about it i was like 0.94

00:51:41.560 who in the hell is this guy totally super funny a couple weeks later we see them and we're going

00:51:50.040 trick-or-treating and he's holding on his wife's shoulder he's blind he's blind yep you tried to 0.99

00:51:58.780 give a blind man a handshake and then he thought he was a dick because he didn't shake your hand 1.00

00:52:03.000 back totally and i was like that guy's an asshole and he's just totally blind now he wasn't 100 1.00

00:52:09.680 blind right a lot of people don't realize this like legally blind they may not see like 1.00

00:52:14.760 you know the bottom portion of their vision's missing so you just didn't see my hand right

00:52:19.820 but it was so funny because i had i had such this harsh judgment towards this guy i'm like i hate

00:52:25.860 that guy and uh no he's just blind that's funny um it you probably thought when he put his hand

00:52:33.460 on his wife's shoulder you're like that guy's being led around like a little puppy dog you're

00:52:37.440 still judging him well i my oldest son is blind right and i immediately knew i was like oh my

00:52:43.820 gosh i'm like seriously kids like i should know better oh my god super funny there's there's a

00:52:51.120 video ryan seacrest he's like hosting a competition or something and it's i can't remember but it's a

00:52:57.360 blind person singing and they do a great job and he knows they're blind and he goes up and says

00:53:02.560 hey great job and he goes like this to give him a high five it's so funny well my kids do that to

00:53:12.560 my oldest oldest son all the time they're like just mess with them like because or the whisper 0.99

00:53:17.260 they'll be like oh that's mean you look like an idiot but he's he's partially deaf too so he can't 0.98

00:53:22.600 hear her so everyone just like tease at him but it's fun like he's good about it hey he's good 1.00

00:53:29.080 about it yeah you got to deal with it man it's like you have to you got to have to laugh at the

00:53:34.060 circumstance sometimes you know it helps make it a little bit better but it's the only way to get

00:53:38.400 through life sometimes all right i have another question and i know you got a jet but this this

00:53:44.280 this came to mind um when is it appropriate and what is the best way to give a woman a hug let's

00:53:53.300 say it's not even like and you're not interested romantically so maybe it's a friend's wife maybe

00:53:58.500 it's somebody you just met at maybe at a business conference what when do you think it's appropriate

00:54:04.520 for a hug and what does that hug actually look like dude i mean the minute you go into corporate

00:54:11.260 america this gets all sideways right but outside of the workplace i mean if you ask my wife and her

00:54:17.760 family you hug everybody even if you just met them right she's like yeah for sure they hug and kiss

00:54:23.500 everybody right and and it's interesting let me say it this way anyone that's slightly offended

00:54:28.860 by hugs get out of america and you'll realize that this is just a cultural phenomenon and it's just

00:54:36.960 different and you go to a different country not only are you getting hugged you're getting kissed

00:54:41.820 by everybody too while you're at it like and it's just different you know what i mean and we're way

00:54:47.140 too sensitive it's like someone hugs someone and it's like that's inappropriate it's like come on

00:54:51.840 you know i i think we i mean it could be yeah i think we've swung it there could be a certain

00:54:56.640 hand placement or a little lingering that isn't welcome or it could be yeah yeah yeah for sure

00:55:01.040 fair enough but for me i mean being in in the corporate america space right like i'd stay away

00:55:07.040 from hugs almost always from a corporate setting unless i have a really strong relationship with

00:55:12.140 the person right like we are friends outside the workplace like let me say it this way our

00:55:17.480 relationship is more important than the job at that point for sure but before then it's it's not worth

00:55:23.480 the risk yeah i agree yeah well i think so asia kisses people on the cheek right absolutely yeah

00:55:31.420 okay well so it's not just me then i was like i don't know if i should tell no no it wasn't just

00:55:35.640 you that she was kissing no trust me she's kissing all the guys well she i remember the first she

00:55:42.960 gave me a hug and she kissed me on the cheek and i'm like oh thank you yeah like that was well and

00:55:48.920 it was fine coming from her but i was like surprised a little bit and it's it's a combination

00:55:54.080 of hawaii right hawaiian but her her grandma's french oh yeah so so that's a common when i met

00:56:02.420 her grandma she's giving me double kisses we go to france and meet her cousins right like

00:56:07.000 so it's a combination of the two that's very both of those cultures are very affectionate physically

00:56:12.460 you know i think so with the with the woman thing again if it's not like a romantic interest i think

00:56:19.100 the best thing to do is if you feel like a hug might be appropriate but you don't know

00:56:23.180 is turn at a 45 degree angle yeah extend your arm like and let her come into it and if she doesn't

00:56:31.380 you know you might just put your hand on her shoulder and say nice to meet you and that's it 0.63

00:56:34.580 but if you extend your arm and she comes in and your arm in this situation goes on top

00:56:40.620 not underneath keep it on top yeah and over the shoulder and watch out for the shoulder

00:56:47.060 check to the face i've actually done that on accident a couple times

00:56:50.580 take this don't ever try to hug me again conor mcgregor

00:56:56.240 oh that was crazy that conor mcgregor to uh cowboy serroney man dude it messed him up a

00:57:05.620 little bit i think it may damage yeah shoulder checks like four or five of them in a row anyways

00:57:10.980 all right brother i know you've got to go on time guys i hope that was just a little bit of fun a

00:57:15.540 little more light-hearted hopefully we gave you actually i think there was some answers that were

00:57:18.840 worth some good deep discussion but hopefully it's a little more light-hearted today we'll do

00:57:22.840 some fun stuff in the future uh we're gonna do one we're gonna give you wrong answers only and

00:57:27.220 then we're gonna see if you can determine which is the right and the wrong answer or you know

00:57:31.500 what would be funny is like one true uh two truths and a lie so when we answer it we give

00:57:36.920 like two things that are accurate accurate information and then one where you're like

00:57:40.920 wait do i should i do that but we'll make it really hard to know just to confuse everybody

00:57:46.720 i love it all right guys so real quick y'all i'll go ahead kip well i just want to call it that

00:57:52.620 preview call may 19th right so may 19th 8 p.m eastern time the iron council.com slash preview

00:57:59.280 if you guys want to join us there. You know, one of the things I was going to say about that real

00:58:03.240 quickly is a lot of the times when we talk about the iron council, we talk about the benefit to

00:58:07.480 you of having brothers in your corner and accountability and systems and just having

00:58:11.840 men to converse with and lean on and, and, and push and inspire. And, and all of that is really

00:58:18.640 good. It's important. But one of the things that I think is often understated is the value of

00:58:25.900 having men that you can just laugh with and banter with and make fun of in a in a respectful way

00:58:32.680 um and just lighten things up a little because the load of life is can be quite unbearable at times

00:58:40.880 depending on what you're going through and if you have guys in your corner who are always cheering

00:58:45.440 you on and celebrating or not at all you know that that's good if you have people in your corner

00:58:48.800 who can do that but man how cool is it to find like find a friend who you can actually like like

00:58:56.960 the other day i sent you a message and i was like you remember this text i sent you and i said

00:59:00.520 hey kip like i really appreciate you coming out to the event it was awesome to have you there

00:59:04.700 there's i said i think i said there's five people i really trust in this world you're the six and

00:59:09.400 you almost made the cut and it's like to be able to have like people that you know love and care

00:59:16.620 about you but you can joke around with is part of i think what makes life really good and you'll

00:59:22.160 find a lot of that totally also inside the iron council so check it out um the iron council.com

00:59:26.780 slash preview all right kip appreciate you man thanks for uh compiling the questions today guys

00:59:31.920 thanks for the questions you offered we've got more so we'll we'll dig through those and we'll

00:59:36.340 keep going we will also be back on friday until then go out there take action and become the man

00:59:41.660 you are meant to be. Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast. If you're ready to take

00:59:48.360 charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be, we invite you to join the order

00:59:52.980 at orderofman.com.

Order of Man - May 13, 2026

The Power of Meritocracy, Conspiracies Debunked, and Elevating Our Standards ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

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