Order of Man - The Power of Uncomfortable Truths ｜ SEAN WHALEN

00:00:00.000 The truth is often uncomfortable and frankly, most of us aren't willing to take a deep hard look

00:00:04.580 into what we know to be true. We do this because we're afraid, afraid of what we might see,

00:00:10.820 afraid of what it may expose in ourselves, afraid of what the truth may require us to do moving

00:00:15.840 forward. My guest today is a friend and long-term mentor of mine. His name is Sean Whalen. And one

00:00:22.100 things he's been consistent about is his desire to seek and share the truth. And he's revealed

00:00:27.580 for better or worse, some truths about myself that I was unwilling to acknowledge for a very

00:00:32.600 long time. Today, we talk about why some people despise the success of others, acknowledging

00:00:38.660 what kind of man you need to become in order to achieve what you want, why most people are

00:00:45.080 blissfully dissatisfied, and the power of embracing uncomfortable truths.

00:00:50.620 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly charge

00:00:55.620 your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.

00:01:01.080 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong. This is your life. This is

00:01:07.700 who you are. This is who you will become at the end of the day. And after all is said and

00:01:12.740 done, you can call yourself a man.

00:01:15.640 Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Mickler, and I am the host and the founder

00:01:19.940 of this podcast and the movement that is Order of the Man. If you don't yet know what

00:01:24.400 we're about, this is a podcast dedicated to giving you the conversations that you need

00:01:29.280 to become a more capable, a more effective, a more efficient father, husband, business

00:01:34.560 owner, community leader. We've had some incredible men on the podcast. I just released my conversation

00:01:39.100 with Mark Manson just last week, but we've had David Goggins, Jocko Willink, Grant Cardone,

00:01:45.360 Andy Frisilla, Tim Kennedy, Dakota Meyer, Jordan Harbinger, Brian Rose. The lineup is phenomenal

00:01:52.780 and it's getting better. It's getting better. I've got some incredible conversations lined

00:01:58.080 up over the next several weeks that are going to be dropping here soon. One with Steven Pressfield,

00:02:01.760 one with Dave Rubin, one with Matt Fraser. Guys, we've got just a powerhouse lineup. So if you

00:02:08.220 aren't subscribed to the podcast, please make sure you do. And also I don't ask this a whole lot,

00:02:12.000 but I need you to do one thing. You need to go in and leave a rating and review. All right.

00:02:16.180 If you haven't done that yet, I'm going to get after you a little bit. If you've been listening

00:02:19.520 to the show for any amount of time and you find value, any bit of value in any of the conversations

00:02:24.340 that we've had, then do me a favor. Just do me a solid, go leave a rating and review. Guys,

00:02:29.480 this is the only way we grow the show. I don't run ads. I don't do anything on Facebook. I'm not

00:02:35.960 hawking a bunch of products and pitching you a bunch of stuff. So if you would, please just

00:02:41.100 leave a rating and review because it goes a very long way. And it's a great way just to say thank

00:02:45.860 you and expose other men who need to know about this message, the message of reclaiming and

00:02:50.560 restoring masculinity. So leave a rating review. All right. Outside of that, not a whole lot of

00:02:55.280 announcements. I've got a very cool program that's going to be available. It's free. It's accessible to

00:03:00.100 anybody. It's called battle readiness. So excuse me, four weeks to battle readiness. So that's going to

00:03:05.860 be coming out soon. Not quite ready. If you head over to our website, order of man.com and sign up

00:03:12.220 for our emails, then you'll be the first to note, be notified when, when that comes available in the

00:03:16.840 next several weeks. Again, it's four weeks to battle readiness. And it's going to be, I'm not

00:03:20.620 going to tell you too much about it, but just get signed up for the emails. Okay. That's all I've got

00:03:24.380 by way of announcements. I want to introduce you to my friend and also long-term mentor. A lot of people

00:03:29.940 don't know that, but Sean Whalen is a coach of mine and really he's been instrumental in helping me

00:03:34.920 build a order of man and into what it is, what you're listening to now, but more importantly,

00:03:39.820 me into who I am. Now, I don't always agree with Sean or even to a degree, get along with him,

00:03:45.580 but I believe that's part of the power of having a solid coach and a mentor. It's somebody who you

00:03:52.100 can respect, but challenges you to look at life in a way that is difficult and uncomfortable because

00:03:58.080 that's what helps you excel and grow. And Sean certainly makes people feel uncomfortable.

00:04:03.340 I say that in a good way. He says out loud what most people believe to be things that you shouldn't

00:04:10.500 say at all. And in the process, his videos and messages have been viewed hundreds of millions of

00:04:15.100 times. Obviously he's very polarizing, but he forces you to look at situations and events in new

00:04:21.660 ways. And he's personally helped me achieve some incredible results in my life. So I'm happy to be able

00:04:27.300 to introduce Sean to you and I hope you enjoy this conversation. I'm building a GI Joe. Yeah. You

00:04:33.640 said you're building a monster this time around, right? I'm building a monster, dude. Well, it appears

00:04:37.800 that way. You're looking good, man. Yeah. Represent. Represent. Yeah. I'm on day eight right now of my

00:04:44.260 first go with 75 hard. So it's been awesome. You're doing it? Yeah. It's been good, man. I'm down

00:04:48.780 like eight pounds right now down, uh, like a percent and a half on body fat. Yeah. Clear focused

00:04:57.120 distraction free. Uh, I actually said no today to five different people were like, Hey, can we catch

00:05:03.060 up? Or can I pick your brain? I'm like, no, we can't do that. I've got other things I got to get

00:05:07.200 done. So that clarity has been helpful, man. I'm telling you, man, it's a game changer. I've, I've,

00:05:12.640 I've said it from the beginning. You know what I mean? I mean, you know, the story and the deal. I mean,

00:05:17.660 I changed my body radically, but like, dude, it changed every aspect of my life. Like Andy's

00:05:23.520 talked about it. I've talked about it. Everybody's talking about it. It's like, it's, it's a 90%

00:05:27.900 mental deal. And the benefit is like, you can get ripped if you actually work out really hard.

00:05:33.020 Right. Yeah. I think the physicality of it, the, the, the way your body looks, the way you feel,

00:05:37.540 the way you feel about it physically is just a manifestation of everything that's going around

00:05:41.160 up here in your brain. Yep. Last night was a hard one for me. I was, it was raining. It was cold.

00:05:46.260 I hadn't gotten my, my 45 minute, uh, outdoor workout in yet. And I literally sat on my couch

00:05:52.120 like any last time I was like rationalizing to myself. Ah, it's funny. I actually thought last

00:05:57.160 night, fuck it. I'll just start over. Oh, really? I was like, I'll just start over, dude. I'm good. 1.00

00:06:01.880 Whatever. You're like, no, not doing that. You already did this. You know, this game.

00:06:05.940 Yeah. And I got up at 1245 and walked until almost 2 AM and throws my dick off and whatever. 0.99

00:06:12.460 I saw it. Yeah. I saw it. Um, on your Instagram stories. I was like, yep, I was doing that a 0.99

00:06:16.980 couple of days ago. The hardest thing for me has been the water though. Like the water

00:06:21.200 is, yeah, dude, the water's been rough. Like I don't know. Yeah. I've done that a little

00:06:25.980 bit. I've done that a little. That's a good idea. Some days, like, I don't even want to

00:06:29.320 drink it. It's just like, I don't want any more water, but I'll throw in like zip fizzes

00:06:33.680 or crystal light kind of things. And I feel like if you start early enough, if you get

00:06:39.940 up and like chug a bunch right out of the gate, you kind of stay ahead of the curve, then

00:06:43.920 you're not having to slam it. Cause dude, I've talked to people like trying to drink half

00:06:47.160 a gallon right before they go to bed and it makes sick or they're up pissing all night

00:06:50.800 kind of thing. So if you just, I have it where I like chug a bunch right in the morning,

00:06:55.400 right when I get up, I don't know.

00:06:57.680 It's a good way to do it, man. Pace it out a little bit. Well, Hey, um, here's my notes for

00:07:02.760 today. There's no notes at all. I figured, uh, I'm going to write some things down just

00:07:10.620 so I can go back and review, but I figured you and I just have a conversation. A lot of

00:07:13.600 people who are listening probably don't know you were one of my very first mentors in this

00:07:18.720 space, what four, four and a half years ago. And I don't think people know that. So I got

00:07:24.060 to tell you first and foremost, before we get into the conversation, man, I just would not

00:07:27.340 be where I am today without your guidance instruction, you being a lighthouse, even outside

00:07:32.640 of our formal mentoring, just you showing up the way that you show up has been invaluable

00:07:37.080 for me.

00:07:37.980 Dude, I appreciate that. I actually found an old video of you talking about that a while

00:07:42.980 ago and it's been fun seeing it. I had somebody ask me the other day about like the whole,

00:07:47.720 you know, when I came up with like the produce, protect, provide and like, is that a word, man?

00:07:51.820 And it's like, dude, that's watching you evolve that concept into the camps and moving in the

00:07:57.800 podcast and the whole thing. It's just like, it's been super cool. So dude, hats off to you for,

00:08:01.940 uh, for doing the work and adding the value. And you've had, you've had some conversations

00:08:06.360 with some pretty fucking incredible people, man. 0.97

00:08:08.300 Yeah. Yeah. I've been fortunate that way. Um, a lot of people believe in what we're doing. A lot 0.96

00:08:12.440 of people see the need for what we're doing. I know you're one of them. Um, you know,

00:08:16.720 I mean, that's the thing you did it. You know what I mean? Like you see it, you're leading from

00:08:21.600 the front. And to me, that's like what I've just always shared with people. And you know,

00:08:25.680 that is from coaching. It's like, dude, like be lying. Go out and do your thing.

00:08:30.060 Like make your moves, do your shit. Don't wait for people. And you've done it. So hats off to you, 1.00

00:08:35.620 man. You know, it's funny when I, cause people will ask, you know, like, how did you build this?

00:08:39.100 And you know, I look at what you've done. I look at what we've done and we've had good levels of

00:08:43.620 success where a lot of people have tried similar things and fallen flat on their face. And they

00:08:47.640 ask like, Oh, well, what is it that you did? You know, is there one secret? I'm like, dude,

00:08:51.260 I'm not, I'm, I'm really like, if you could get into my mind, you would know, like, I don't think

00:08:57.080 that highly of myself. Like I've got some self-esteem issues. Sometimes I feel like who

00:09:02.040 the hell am I to be talking about what it means to be a man. There isn't anything special about us.

00:09:07.080 It's like, I'm just willing to say some things that I believe and I'm willing to do it forever,

00:09:12.320 regardless of who shows up or not. And that's it. I wish there was something else,

00:09:16.720 but there isn't anything other than that. Dude, I, I, I feel you on that. Like that's,

00:09:22.420 there's so many people that think that there's a magic pill, right? Like, Oh,

00:09:26.460 I've got a coach and I'm going to get this magic thing and it's going to just instantly, whatever.

00:09:30.220 And I don't think people realize like how difficult, like the conversation that I've been

00:09:34.760 having for a couple of years about, you know, vulnerability and truth and speaking your mind.

00:09:38.720 I mean, you know, case in point with this whole coronavirus, I'm sure you want to talk about

00:09:41.820 at some point in time. Yeah, we'll get to it for sure. To use that as an example, like five weeks

00:09:46.540 ago, I was saying shit that no one wanted to hear. No one. I was called a murderer. I had 0.99

00:09:51.340 people wish death on my children. I had people wish death on me. I literally had people that were 0.78

00:09:55.320 saying like, I hope your children get the coronavirus and die. I know it's based off what 0.55

00:10:00.380 I was saying. Well, fast forward to today and pretty much every single thing that I was saying

00:10:05.360 was right. It's just that people didn't want to hear it. Right. It's like truth, which sparks people

00:10:10.460 like you could be morbidly obese and somebody's like, yo, you're morbidly obese. And you're like,

00:10:14.860 oh my God, I'm so offended. And it's like, you're offended by truth. Like you're fucking 600 pounds.

00:10:19.500 Like, let's just talk truth for a second. And it's been, it's been interesting because 0.99

00:10:23.760 for me personally, like there's been a lot of conflict with me. You talk about insecurities

00:10:28.220 and stuff. Some, I mean, if you read like Steve Jobs's biography, Steve Jobs was wildly insecure,

00:10:34.160 massive demons, like depression up the wazoo, bipolar, like, you know what I mean? A lot of the

00:10:40.140 the most successful people that I know that are out there, whether they're influencers,

00:10:44.120 business owners, they have a lot of insecurities. I am one of them. I have a ton of them. I question

00:10:49.160 myself frequently. Right. And then the last couple of weeks, it's just been like, fuck man,

00:10:53.420 I'm catching a ton of shit on this. Like a ton of shit, not like three or four people, but thousands 1.00

00:10:59.100 unfollowing me and literally thousands of comments, like thousands of them. And it was been, 0.99

00:11:05.300 it's just been interesting for me to sit back and be like, no, dude, like this is what you needed to

00:11:10.480 say. And you said it. And now it's kind of like, I shared this the other day in the last couple of

00:11:15.920 days, since a lot of these reports have been coming out about bogus numbers and all such stuff.

00:11:19.540 I've seen way more people talking about it. Right. Yeah. It's kind of like the old thing with like

00:11:23.940 Trump. Hey, I'm voting for Trump. I can't put a sign in my yard and I don't want to talk about it

00:11:27.900 at Thanksgiving, but if the pollsters ask me, I'm voting for somebody else. Exactly. Right. And so it's one of

00:11:33.180 those things where it's like being able to share what you feel called and compelled to share what

00:11:37.740 burns inside of you, whether it's masculinity, whether it's parenting, whether it's politics,

00:11:41.580 sex, money, politics, religion, whatever it is. Right. There's so many people that say to me and

00:11:45.680 they, I know they say the same thing to you, dude, you say the things that, that, that I think and

00:11:49.160 feel, I just don't know how to say them or I can't say them or whatever. And so I think it's, it's a,

00:11:55.180 it's a gift. Maybe it's a curse. I don't really know. All I know is like, this is all I know how to do.

00:12:00.400 And I know that it catches some shit, but I also know that the flip side is for every, 0.99

00:12:04.400 every one person that calls me an asshole, there's a hundred that appreciate it. So, 1.00

00:12:09.160 you know, interesting time. It is interesting times. It's, it's hard because everybody has

00:12:14.920 an opinion and everybody has a voice and it's all kind of equal. We all have an equal playing field.

00:12:19.420 I actually just experienced this. I would say like my first like genuine test, if I could stand behind

00:12:26.020 what I said just the other day, I posted something on Twitter about what I've accomplished over the past

00:12:30.120 four to six weeks. Like I'm proud of some of the things that I've done over that time. And I posted

00:12:34.180 that and I said, how about you? And I was expecting that people were like, oh, I've done this and I've

00:12:39.140 done this. I'm so excited. No, it's not. That's exactly thousands, like four or 5,000 people ratioed

00:12:46.660 on, on, uh, on Twitter came out and said, oh, well, you know, you're an idiot. Look at yourself 1.00

00:12:51.300 aggrandizing. I'm like, man, I'm just trying to explain that, that there's some positivity. And then

00:12:56.040 there's this idea that like, I actually saw this term thrown around the other day. It was, um,

00:13:00.740 happiness, privilege, happiness, privilege that if you're happy, that's a privilege, man. 1.00

00:13:06.480 Like privilege, black, purple privilege, fucking privilege, fucking fast car privilege. And 1.00

00:13:12.080 everything's privileged nowadays. Right. I think it, um, yeah, you know, that's what they,

00:13:16.440 they describe it as, but really what it is, is their inability to produce any sort of results in

00:13:22.920 their life. And then instead of working on that, what they'd rather do is pull you down,

00:13:28.900 tear you down. Cause that's way easier than me actually going, doing the same work that you or

00:13:33.760 somebody else who was successful did. Totally. Dude. I mean, I got in shape last year, right? I

00:13:38.200 always, I was always strong and I was always in the gym and I was always fit, but I never was like

00:13:43.300 ripped. You know what I mean? Like six pack kind of ripped. Right. And last year, you know,

00:13:47.220 I had major spine surgery. And so I took my body on as a challenge. Like I'm like, no dude,

00:13:52.480 I'm going ball steep. Like I'm going all into my body. I'm going to build something that I never

00:13:56.580 thought I could build. I never thought I could have a six pack. My jeans, my parents were both

00:14:01.200 big and overweight and like six packs are for other guys. And I went on this fucking insane 0.98

00:14:07.760 journey and I, and I, and I learned how difficult it was to build a physique like that. And literally 0.97

00:14:14.220 like I'll take, I'll post pictures. You see, I mean, if you follow me on social media, you know what I'm

00:14:17.820 right? You see him. Yeah. I'm proud as fuck of what I built. Zero bones about it. Zero. When I

00:14:23.600 look good in the mirror, I'm like, damn, you look fucking good. Right. Post that. What's really 1.00

00:14:27.600 fascinating to, to, to echo what you're saying. You know, I haven't had a single person, a single

00:14:34.200 fitness person, a single person who's ripped, who, who was legitimately in shape, ever talk shit on any 0.94

00:14:41.280 of those pictures. In fact, the biggest cheerleaders are those people. No doubt. People 0.98

00:14:46.080 that talk the most shit. Oh, why don't you post another selfie? Why don't you do this? Oh, look 1.00

00:14:50.540 at you, whatever, whatever. They're all fat. They're all in shape. When I went through my bankruptcy and 1.00

00:14:54.800 lost millions of dollars, like I have never had one person. We know, we both know a lot of very

00:15:00.180 successful, very wealthy people. I've never had a single one of my friends who's a multimillionaire

00:15:05.300 or billionaire ever speak one word about that. Make fun of me, mock me. Who are the people that

00:15:11.500 do it? The people that are broke. People that have never made a million dollars want to talk

00:15:15.640 about me making millions of dollars. It's the same thing. Like with my fights, I've had five MMA

00:15:20.120 fights. I lost two of them. The people that talk the most, Oh, did you see Sean get knocked out?

00:15:25.940 They've never been in a fight. You don't know how many of my UFC buddies have ever spoken one word or

00:15:31.040 talked any shit zero. And so like, it's something like, as you say, like, as you look at those 0.56

00:15:37.060 comments, you look at those people, none of them are speaking their truth. None of them are out front.

00:15:41.800 And I think this is a huge lesson, like for not only what I share with people, but like, you're

00:15:47.060 going to be judged. Like you're going to be judged no matter what you say, no matter what you do,

00:15:50.980 Ryan, like you could say, I love my wife and people be like, Oh, he fucking hates trees. And it's 0.98

00:15:55.740 like, it's just the dumbest, right? I can post to my dog and say, I love my dogs. And be like, 0.97

00:16:00.720 he hates cats. Call PETA. It's like, no, I just love my dogs. Let me fucking love my dogs. Right?

00:16:06.100 We just live in a really interesting time where it's this, this social media thing.

00:16:10.500 This has given people a lot of gusto. It's given people a lot of fucking false sense of security 0.96

00:16:16.460 because those same people that talk shit online, if they pass by me on the street, 0.99

00:16:22.180 they'd probably want an autograph. They'd probably want to take a selfie with me. 0.99

00:16:25.000 They wouldn't say one fucking word. And want to know how I know this? Anybody who's watching 0.99

00:16:30.040 this that doesn't like me show up, come to my warehouse and throw on some boxing gloves with

00:16:34.920 me. I'm not hard to find. You see what I'm saying? And every time I've extended that invitation and

00:16:39.980 trust me, believe me, there's plenty of people out there that beat my ass, but the people that 1.00

00:16:45.200 talk the most shit are the people that do the least, right? The people leave the least amount of 1.00

00:16:49.500 results. And it's way easier to talk shit about you and your life than it is to like, 0.99

00:16:55.420 look inward and to talk about mine, which is why I think we're in the debacle that we're in right 0.99

00:17:00.060 now in the situation that we're in, not only with this coronavirus thing, but just our culture in

00:17:04.140 general. This is why we're as fat as we are as a society, why we're as broke as we are as a society,

00:17:08.900 why we're as disconnected as fathers and, and men. You know what I'm saying? It's, it's,

00:17:13.580 it's a really, really, really fascinating experience. Well, I think there's also this,

00:17:17.620 this idea of like virtue signaling that, that if I call you out for something that is,

00:17:22.840 is perceived, even in the slightest perceived as being wrong by others, then I get to step myself

00:17:28.360 up on the scale of virtue or even worse. If I'm a bigger victim than you, then I'm more virtuous

00:17:35.060 because I, I've, I have harder than you do, which is a real shame. Like I can't believe this race to the 1.00

00:17:41.780 bottom that we're experiencing with so many people. That's actually a really good race to 1.00

00:17:45.120 the bottom. That's actually a really good saying. That's a great quote. Cause it's true. I mean,

00:17:49.620 it's literally like, you know, you share a story. Oh, well, you don't know about mine. Mine's worse.

00:17:55.780 No, mine's worse. It's like, I literally know dudes that are still blaming the market crash in 2008

00:18:01.500 for why they're broke. I'm like, bro, that was 12 years ago. That was 12 fucking years ago. I lost

00:18:07.660 millions. You lost me. What have you done in the last 12 fucking years, bro? Like get up,

00:18:13.780 keep going. Right. Right. It's funny though. How, um, how much people identify with that pain,

00:18:21.120 you know what I mean? How it's way easier to stay in the pain of like victimhood than it is to like

00:18:27.160 experience the pain of like going out and actually creating change. Cause it is painful. You know,

00:18:31.820 either are painful. Right. But it's like, which people are far more comfortable staying overweight

00:18:41.700 and broke and victimized, if you will, then charting a new course. And it's really,

00:18:48.300 it's a really fascinating thing. Building a body is fucking painful. It's not, it's not simple. 0.99

00:18:52.360 You're sore. I'm 41 years old. My joints hurt the whole thing. Right. I have every excuse. I got a

00:18:57.300 torn rotator cuff, both my knees redone. Right. I've got two choices. Like blame all of that shit

00:19:03.460 and who surrounds me then victims, right? A bunch of fucking weak men, a bunch of pussies, 1.00

00:19:08.740 or I show up and say, no, dude, I want more and I want bigger. And this is, I think like this, 1.00

00:19:13.640 I know this is what order men is about. Lines of sheep is about. It's like, dude, go create what it

00:19:18.560 is that you want. Build it, literally build it, build the business, build the family, build the

00:19:24.320 relationship, build the body. And it's fascinating how few people want to do it.

00:19:30.620 You know, and, and I'm actually, look, here's my thought. If that's the life you want to live,

00:19:34.900 like if you want to be overweight, you want to be broke, you want to be mediocre. You want to coast

00:19:39.240 all the power to you. I actually hope that you have a successful life. I hope you have some romance

00:19:43.640 and you have some fun and experiences, but if that's the life you choose to live, then you forfeit

00:19:48.800 your right to complain about what somebody else is doing to excel. Cause what they do

00:19:53.860 has, has no relevance in your life. Like my success doesn't come at your expense. In fact,

00:20:00.840 if anything, I'm paving the way. Like if I can show you that this guy can be successful,

00:20:05.160 then surely you can. And I actually made it easier for you to do. I gave you a track to run on. I beat

00:20:11.060 down the path so you can run on it. If your people aren't broke, I've said this all the time,

00:20:15.880 people are not broke because somebody else is rich. That's how it works. You're not fat

00:20:22.060 because I'm ripped. You're not broke because someone else is rich. You're broke. You're

00:20:27.760 broke. You're fat because you choose to be fat. Oh, but Sean, my genetics, it doesn't fight. Here's 0.99

00:20:33.760 why that's invalid. David Goggins, perfect example. Totally. He was fat as fuck. He made a decision.

00:20:40.440 He went on a journey. He changed. And this is like, it's the old four minute mile story, right? Well,

00:20:45.700 it can't be done. And then all of a sudden somebody does it and now everybody does it,

00:20:49.560 right? So it's that, that idea, like I can't do it because my body hurts. I'm sore. I'm fat.

00:20:55.840 And it's like, that would work. That would be a great excuse. However, 2.7 million other people

00:21:02.480 have already done it. How many broke people have you seen that now become wealthy? So your excuse of,

00:21:10.720 I had a bad upbringing. I don't know my genetics. The thing that's crazy is those stories don't,

00:21:18.700 they're not logical anymore. And I think that's, what's causing so much frustration and pain and

00:21:24.440 anger, you know, in our culture is like, people know that you watch somebody who was broke become

00:21:30.660 wealthy and it makes you mad. I want that, but it's way easier to stay addicted to the story over

00:21:36.840 here. Or you see David Goggins. I was fat. I got ripped. And it's like, shit, I want that. And I

00:21:44.860 think people secretly do. They truly, truly, truly do. But they know what, they hear the story and it's

00:21:52.500 way easier to stay in the, in the addictive pattern of victimhood than it is to say, I'm going

00:21:58.840 to go on a journey and I'm going to build something different. Cause dude, it is scary. Don't get me

00:22:03.860 wrong. Like it is scary. Like when you go from being poor to having money, the people that surround

00:22:09.420 you when you're poor, it's social contracts. We talk about this all the time. You're breaking these

00:22:13.920 social contracts. You have to leave certain people. You have to leave certain ideas. You have to leave

00:22:18.700 certain patterns. If you're getting drunk every night with your friends and you're replacing that

00:22:22.940 with like work time and building a new business time, those people are going to be like, what do

00:22:26.640 you think you're better than us? So it's hard to do it. It's hard to go. If you live in a fat family

00:22:33.500 and you see families like this all the time, I'm not trying to be a dick, but mom and dad are grossly 1.00

00:22:37.980 overweight. They got four kids and they're fucking fat little turds too. Again, you can judge me all you 1.00

00:22:42.800 want. I'm just speaking truth. And sometimes people need a hug. Sometimes people need punch in the

00:22:46.840 fucking face. They're never going to change. You're not going to see one of those kids just 1.00

00:22:52.300 magically just all of a sudden sprout up and build some muscles until they leave the addictive

00:22:57.320 pattern and they leave the addictive environment that they're in. And I don't think people realize

00:23:01.780 number one, one, how difficult that is, but two, how possible that is too. I mean, we live in a day

00:23:07.380 and age of connection. We live in a day and age where you have access to so much instant data. Gary talks

00:23:12.920 about this. You talk about, I talk about it. There's literally no excuse that's valid for not

00:23:18.300 having what you want. None. Literally every single opportunity is out there. Every single tool is

00:23:24.560 available for you to build anything you want from a body to a relationship to a business. It's all

00:23:31.900 there. It's all there. The barrier to entry has never been lowered. You know what I think it is though?

00:23:36.180 I think it's people's egos. Like I'll give you my own anecdote here is because you've caught,

00:23:40.560 you personally have called me out on some BS over the past four years. And my first year,

00:23:46.300 what's the first, what's the number one thing you can think of? The one I went, one thing I can

00:23:50.880 think of is that I went to an event that you hosted and, uh, and you had a PT session that first

00:23:57.900 morning and I didn't go to it. And you were like, you got in my face. You're like, what the hell,

00:24:04.240 man? You're trying to lead men and you can't even wake up at 5am and get, get here to this PT session

00:24:08.740 and work out with us. And my knee jerk reaction is like, well, screw you, dude. I don't need you. 1.00

00:24:13.780 Like, I don't need any of this bullshit. Like that, that was my reaction. But then thinking about it, 1.00

00:24:18.700 I was like, no, wait, that's like, that's actually true. Like that's actually a really good point.

00:24:24.740 But it's hard. It's hard to hear that. But at the same time, you and I both know something

00:24:29.580 and you've experienced and I've experienced, like I, it's really easy to have people that will

00:24:35.320 support you and where you are around you. Right. You know, did a post about this the other day

00:24:41.040 about this whole, you know, you are enough idea and it's dangerous, man. It's dangerous because

00:24:47.080 there's a lot of coaches out there that will peddle this story. Like you're enough, you're

00:24:50.720 enough bullshit. Any coach that tells you that any human being that tells you that is literally like 0.99

00:24:56.440 enabling your mediocrity. They're allowing you to stay in mediocrity. They're, they're validating,

00:25:02.520 hear me. They're validating you being in mediocrity. Yeah. They're encouraging it.

00:25:07.900 Validates your mediocrity is a fucking scam and a fraud. Get rid of them. Any coach that tells you 1.00

00:25:13.500 that. Now don't, don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that you're completely fucked, whatever,

00:25:17.700 whatever. But if the idea that you have is like, I'm good here and you become addicted to that 0.99

00:25:23.880 and there's never progression, there's never growth. I mean, Ed Milet talks about this. Do

00:25:28.760 we're name dropping everybody in this. This is fucking great. Ed Milet talks about being blissfully 0.99

00:25:32.960 dissatisfied. I'm happy with where I am. I'm happy drinking my wine, smoking my cigar, watching this

00:25:38.480 sunset, but I want more. And I think this is what's really like what you're talking about. Like

00:25:43.240 going back to that example of, of having people around you that will push you, man.

00:25:48.440 You know what I mean? If you get offended by that stuff all the time, you got to go inside and check.

00:25:52.580 But like, I want people in my life. I want coaches and mentors and friends that are like,

00:25:57.480 yo dude, you're slipping. You're slipping. I know you can do more than that. I know you can do better

00:26:02.860 than that. You know what I mean? Yeah. And it was, cause I had, I had one of my clients here in town

00:26:06.960 yesterday. Um, one of my one-on-one clients and I, and it's funny cause he's out of shape and, uh,

00:26:13.360 owns a very successful business, makes a couple million dollars a year and trying to get kind of

00:26:17.020 wrangle in life and get everything together. I said, bring your workout shit. We're going to work out in the 0.99

00:26:20.560 morning. So he came with me to work out with me and my trainer. Um, and we went hard. I mean,

00:26:25.020 I go hard with my workouts. Right. And, and it was leg day and we're going hard and he was trying to

00:26:30.520 keep up with what I was doing in the same weight and the whole thing. And, and about halfway through

00:26:34.740 one of the sets, my trainer was kind of like helping him up on the leg press machine and like

00:26:39.360 moving. I said, dude, get the fuck off it. Don't touch it. You've got this. And in his mind, 0.99

00:26:43.920 it was like, I'm going to rack it. And then I'm going to pause because like, I need to do that.

00:26:47.840 I'm like, no, don't fucking touch it. You do this, like do it right now. And it was an interesting 0.97

00:26:52.300 thing for me as a coach. Cause you could see his pain. You could see his frustration,

00:26:55.760 but I knew that he could do it. Right. And he did it. And afterwards he's like, fuck yeah,

00:27:00.320 man. Like that felt really good. You know what I mean? And I think that's something that's really 0.99

00:27:04.200 important. I know this is important for you cause you have coaches and mentors and as do I, um,

00:27:09.980 it's so crucial to change your environment. It's so crucial to change the people that are on your

00:27:17.580 newsfeed, the people that you're listening to the podcast that you're listening to.

00:27:21.100 It's so damn crucial to get the, the, the naysayers and the, and the, the victims out of 0.98

00:27:27.400 your life because like what you put in here, it's the most valuable thing, man. This, this is real

00:27:32.960 estate, 401k IRA, cash money, Rolexes, cars, that ain't worth shit. It's this man. And, and I'm, 0.94

00:27:40.860 I'm fascinated by the human experience. I mean, this is like, you and I talk about this all the time,

00:27:45.460 like just human beings in general, like how we are programmed and, and, and, and what's inside

00:27:50.540 of our DNA, but more importantly, like how simple it is to just put, we put garbage in here and we

00:27:56.140 expect beauty. We listen to terrible people. We listen to gossip and drama all day long and 0.93

00:28:02.820 somehow question our lives and go, why is my life so much drama? Why is there so much drama and chaos?

00:28:07.880 That's cause that's all you put in. It's who you're surrounded by. I want to be surrounded by

00:28:11.980 fucking killers. I want to be surrounded by people that lift way more weight than me, 1.00

00:28:15.940 that are in way better shape than me, that push me, that have more money than me, that are more

00:28:20.680 successful than me, that are better than me in these things. Right. And it's like, I think it's,

00:28:25.080 that's, I always share this and we're just going off on a tangent. No, it's good. That's what I

00:28:29.340 wanted to do, man. Just talk. I think, and I think you would probably agree with this. This is

00:28:32.760 something that costs you nothing. It literally costs you nothing. You don't have to hire a coach. You

00:28:38.360 don't have to hire a mentor. You don't have to spend any money. I don't have to buy a book. You don't have to buy a

00:28:41.860 DVD. The single most powerful thing that anyone listening to this will do. And the thing that's

00:28:47.440 the most accessible, available and capable of you doing right now today is changing your circle,

00:28:55.400 literally getting on and deleting people. You know, as I say drama, I know everyone listening

00:29:00.540 to this already has a person. You already know two, five, 10, 20, and you know that they're drama.

00:29:06.820 You know that they're chaos. You know that they're just victims, right? Well, it's my aunt.

00:29:11.860 I don't fucking care. Nothing is more important than you eliminating that shit from every aspect, 1.00

00:29:18.760 from your visual, seeing it, from your hearing it, your audible, like hearing drama all day 1.00

00:29:25.040 long. I don't care how smart you are, how badass you are. That shit will ruin you. If you see it all 0.85

00:29:31.480 day long, it will ruin you. But it's something that people are so terrified to do, but it's easy and it's

00:29:37.940 free and it just changes your entire life. Getting around different people. People ask me all the

00:29:44.000 time. They ask you the same thing. Dude, Brian, how did you get all these interviews? How did you

00:29:47.720 interview David Goggins? How did you don't go in the whole thing? And you added value. You stopped

00:29:53.660 listening and hanging out with the fucktards and you started listening and engaging with the 1.00

00:29:58.420 killers. And then you know you're in the circle of killers. People ask me, how did you hook up with 1.00

00:30:03.240 Andy Frisilla and Ed Mylen and all these other guys? And he's like, I quit hanging out with the

00:30:06.860 assholes and I started adding value there. I was on Periscope one day. Andy was on Periscope one day. 0.99

00:30:11.760 I happened to follow him. He happened to follow me. And he made a comment. He's like, hey, dude,

00:30:15.220 I love your shit. And I'm like, oh, I love your shit too. We became friends. And it was just literally 1.00

00:30:19.460 engaging in that positivity that sparked that relationship, which has led to dozens of people that I

00:30:25.820 are blessed to call friends. You know what I mean? Oh, for sure. You know, it's funny. My wife

00:30:31.220 and I were walking around the property and you know, we're fortunate where we live and we have

00:30:34.660 this, this property in this house and we were walking around and we're walking back up to the

00:30:38.360 house. And, and I told her, I looked at her, I said, isn't this amazing? Like, this is amazing.

00:30:43.000 Look where we live. Look what we're doing. Look at this house. Like, look at our kids playing.

00:30:46.960 This is amazing. And, and she told me something. She said, you know, it's, it's funny is I've always

00:30:52.560 wanted since the time we were married. I've always wanted to have some property like we have now and

00:30:57.700 live in a big white farm slash ranch house. And now we have it. And my thought was like,

00:31:04.280 that's because that was what was in here. This has been in your mind. And so everything that you've

00:31:10.040 done from our marriage to even working through and salvaging our marriage to helping support what

00:31:16.140 we're doing here with order of man and having my back and then doing all the things that you've been

00:31:20.300 interested, everything, all of those little steps have led us to create the reality of something

00:31:26.920 that you had just thought about. Like, this isn't just luck or fortune. Like we didn't stumble into

00:31:31.380 this stuff. You've been thinking about this exact house since you were a little girl and now you have

00:31:37.640 it because you made it happen. You know, as a master at this is Conor McGregor. Yes. A while ago,

00:31:45.260 that's on my Instagram, it's on Facebook too, where he talked about visualization. I did a podcast on

00:31:50.700 this. And what's really fascinating is a lot of people that haven't experienced this think that

00:31:56.300 what you and I are talking about is just luck, right? You got lucky. You hit the, you hit the

00:32:01.140 numbers and you got lucky. But like the thing I loved about watching Conor talk about this, and he's

00:32:07.500 been talking about it since he was a kid. A long time. He's like, I've been the UFC champ. I've seen it.

00:32:12.220 I've seen the cars. I've seen all that stuff, right? Which is great. But what was really

00:32:16.400 fascinating in the video that I shared is him in the dressing room before the fight with Jose Aldo.

00:32:25.860 And there's video cameras recording this and it's showing him throwing this left hook. And he's

00:32:31.420 doing it over and over again. And he's stepping back on this left hook. And he literally, he talks

00:32:36.380 about before the fight, like a week before he was doing an interview. And he's like, I have literally

00:32:41.080 visualized him throwing a right and me catching him. He's like, I have visualized it. I've seen it.

00:32:47.700 And this is a week before the fight. And you go to what he's doing in the dressing room and he's

00:32:52.140 visualizing this and visualizing this. And a lot of people think that what you're talking about and

00:32:56.640 I'm talking about is just luck. It's just luck. Like you just somehow lucked out. And I'm so radically

00:33:04.120 obsessed with my visions, with what I think about, with what I wake up. I mean, my mirror is covered

00:33:10.940 in quotes and sayings and things. The very first thing I do when I wake up in the morning is I put

00:33:15.800 Joe Rogan on. The single video that I shared in my book, be the hero of your own story. And I listen

00:33:22.440 to that every morning. I've got it memorized now. The reality is I still do it because I want those

00:33:28.560 seeds planted in my brain. And I'm listening and listening and visualizing and visualizing. And sure

00:33:33.320 enough, was it like nine seconds or 11 seconds into the fight? Bop! And he gets the exact shot

00:33:39.560 that he talked about. That's not luck. It wasn't luck that Jose Aldo just happened to get caught

00:33:44.820 there. He visualized it so many fucking times that it became reality. Now there's a big difference 0.99

00:33:50.300 and I'm sure I would love to hear your insight on this too. This idea of like manifestation,

00:33:55.160 right? I think a lot of people think that you just rub, you know, crystals on your skull.

00:33:59.840 Wish it into reality.

00:34:00.980 Just because you're a good person, checks show up and mine is all my money, right? No. Like

00:34:07.380 the manifestation is, is fucking seeing it and vision, like visioning it, literally vision, 0.99

00:34:12.920 writing it down, putting it on paper. This is what I will do. This is what I will have. It'll 0.99

00:34:18.340 be a white house on acres with this, not just like, well, I want a big house.

00:34:23.580 Big house, right. 0.99

00:34:24.360 Literally visualizing exactly what you fucking want. And when you become obsessed with that, 0.99

00:34:29.260 your patterns, your work ethic will start to match that. You know, I was on the beach with

00:34:35.820 Garrett and I think you've heard me share this before. And this is probably one of the bigger

00:34:41.260 lessons that I think I've ever learned. We're on the beach and we're walking down the beach in Laguna

00:34:46.360 beach. And there was this house that was for sale. It was like $26 million beach house. And I, like I

00:34:50.860 said, I think you've heard me share this. And when we started having this conversation about buying this

00:34:54.520 house, right. And people that are listening to this, like seriously, listen to what I'm sharing

00:34:58.300 right now, because if you understand this and you can put this in your pipe and smoke it and apply 0.99

00:35:02.020 this, it'll change your fucking life. Cause it's changed mine and Brian's and many of others. 0.99

00:35:07.300 We're talking about this and like the math to buy a $26 million house is easy. I can give a

00:35:12.680 calculator to my 14 year old and say, okay, how much is 10% down? How much is 20% down? How much

00:35:18.060 is 30% down? $26 million, $2.6 million. You know what I mean? It's all, it's all math. Okay. If we

00:35:23.360 do a 30 year mortgage at 6%, what are my annual pay? I mean, it's, it's math. Buying that house is

00:35:28.880 simple. It's just math. It's just numbers. Anybody can figure that out. What we started to talk about

00:35:35.480 is, is how you buy that house. And the, and the comment came and we started talking about the reality

00:35:41.940 being, who do you have to become to live in a $26 million house? It's not math. It's not the math.

00:35:49.120 It's going to get it. That's easy. The question really is what type of, and I started visualizing

00:35:54.360 this, like literally visioning what type of man drives into the driveway of a $26 million home.

00:36:02.360 What does he look like? What does he smell like? What are his mannerisms? How does he carry himself?

00:36:08.380 What are his morning rituals? What are his evening rituals? How does he work? What does he read?

00:36:14.060 How does he treat his woman? I'm being completely fucking serious. What type of man and literally 0.98

00:36:20.360 envisioning the type of man that lives in a $26 million home? Because the math is easy.

00:36:26.840 It's easy to talk about a body, right? It's easy to talk about a six pack. It's easy to talk about

00:36:31.040 a white house and property and making money, building a business and being a good dad. It's these things

00:36:36.660 are simple. They're just theoreticals that are floating around and they're in books and written

00:36:40.620 in word and the whole thing. The real question is like, in order to achieve any of these things,

00:36:46.140 you have to ask yourself the question, what type of man, speaking just men or woman, what type of man

00:36:52.100 do I have to be in order to build the kind of business that I want? This is literally like,

00:36:59.960 this is the exact business that I want. What type of man owns that business? What type of man

00:37:04.060 buys the dream home for his wife? What type of man lives in a $26 million home? What type of man

00:37:12.340 drives a Ferrari or whatever it is, right? Right, right. Whatever your thing is.

00:37:16.700 Rides horses all day long. I don't give a shit. When you start putting that in your brain, like, 1.00

00:37:21.600 I realized that the type of man that has a six pack is the type of dude that will do the workouts

00:37:27.940 no matter how he feels. Period. Because the old me, I'm sick. I don't feel good. I'm tired. My body's

00:37:35.760 sore. I need a rest day. You need rest. I mean, all of the excuses. And I realized like, the type of

00:37:40.920 dude that has a six pack is the dude that skips no workouts. Does the work. Period. Period. Because if I

00:37:48.460 don't, I won't have that because I live that way. And so, I started like realizing it as I was

00:37:54.240 visioning and seeing things and what I wanted and how I wanted my life to be. It was like,

00:37:59.700 what kind of man owns a race car and races with his son? Well, this is the kind of guy that I need

00:38:04.680 to be. This is the type of thing that I need to be. These are the habits and the rituals that I need

00:38:08.240 to learn and to, you know, exemplify. You know what I mean? I think it's huge. Like, what type of man

00:38:16.780 runs a company like Order of Man? What type of man buys it? And I could tell you, and you know this,

00:38:22.580 you could say this, you're not, it's not the same dude from three years ago. No, not even close.

00:38:28.240 You had to become man in order to do that. I like this thought because, I mean, you're talking

00:38:34.960 about consciousness. You're talking about projecting yourself out into the future. One thing I see a lot

00:38:38.680 of people do, like, you know, I'm spiritual. I know you're spiritual. I'm religious. And I believe

00:38:44.560 in God, right? And it's funny because people who believe in God, when they take it to the extreme

00:38:49.620 sometimes, and you know they have, because they say this, if it's God's will, if he wants it to be,

00:38:56.380 I'm like, dude, as a father, there's things that I want for my children that I cannot possibly give

00:39:02.740 them. Like I can't give it to them. I want it for them, but they have to earn it. They have to go out

00:39:08.420 and create it. I cannot physically give them everything that they want. Just like God cannot

00:39:15.660 give you everything that you want. Like, yes, he wants it for you, but you actually have to go out

00:39:22.120 and do it for yourself. It's not enough just to wish it, or like you said, rub crystals on your

00:39:26.540 nipples. Like you, if we're talking Bible shit, he also says in the Bible, it is not neat that I 1.00

00:39:32.140 should command in all things. Meaning I'm not going to tell you when to take a dump, when to cook your 0.99

00:39:36.280 breakfast, when to go get a job, when to say this. I'm not going to, I'm not going to fucking tell you 0.99

00:39:40.800 everything. You got to go. You got to jump off the cliff. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like 0.99

00:39:44.960 that's part of the game. And I think a lot of like the, the, the manifesting crowd, I'm going to

00:39:50.840 manifest, I can't see, I see these memes and I like want to barf all over my phone.

00:39:55.280 You know what I mean? Millions of, you're going to be the first millionaire in your family.

00:40:00.320 You know, riches are coming your way. Next month you're going to make an exorbitant amount of

00:40:04.700 money. And it's like, what the fuck? Yeah. Fortune cookie stuff. 0.99

00:40:08.960 Everybody that I know that has, that's wealthy work their dick off for it. 0.95

00:40:13.460 Everybody that I know that's ripped works their ass off for it. It's not, you don't just go walk 0.95

00:40:19.860 by the 26 million dollar house and go manifest crystals. But that idea of, of like implant,

00:40:29.860 planting in your brain, this vision of white house, the acres, 26 million dollar house,

00:40:35.260 whatever it is, you, you, when you become obsessed with it, obsessed with it.

00:40:42.340 I have found for me personally, your habits change, your, your consciousness changes,

00:40:48.400 the things you read, the things you study, the things you do. And this is why, and you know,

00:40:54.140 this is a coach. Cause I hear this all the time. I'm ready. I'm in, you know what? I'm in,

00:40:58.160 I'm ready to go. Send me the link. I'm joining the group. I'm in, I'm going to do the deal now.

00:41:02.900 And it's like, cool. Here you go. Oh, Oh wait, what, what do I have to do?

00:41:06.800 You know, $147 a month. Well, you know what? I got to actually go to dinner. I'll get back to

00:41:11.960 you. And I don't even need to say it anymore. Like your, your words don't match your desire.

00:41:18.280 Right.

00:41:18.560 Your actions don't match your desire. You say you want wealth, but you act broke.

00:41:24.960 Do you think that it's people want to be healthy and be present as a father, but you act

00:41:30.720 differently. Right. And that's what I think is really beautiful about this is it's not hard

00:41:36.260 to buy a $26 million house. It's math. The question is, are you willing to do the work

00:41:40.880 to become the person? Are you willing to do the work to buy the white house on the anchors?

00:41:47.920 And then you get there, man. Let me hit the, uh, the pause button very, very quickly.

00:41:53.680 Uh, I've seen a tremendous uptick in new members of the iron council. That's our exclusive

00:41:58.680 brotherhood. And I can only imagine that the reason is because in times of uncertainty,

00:42:02.580 men look to bring stability in order to the chaos, to disorder. Uh, and that's exactly what 0.79

00:42:09.300 we're doing inside the iron council. We're giving you the tools and the framework to predictably.

00:42:14.280 It's very important to predictably and efficiently produce results in your life.

00:42:19.240 So if you're trying to start a business, uh, rekindle a romantic relationship,

00:42:24.880 bond with your kids, get rid of that spare tire that might be hanging around, around your

00:42:30.360 midsection, build wealth, uh, become more influential, get a promotion, whatever, whatever

00:42:35.480 your goal, your objective is, uh, the iron council, uh, has what you need to make that

00:42:40.700 a reality. And when you join with us, you'll get the tools and the framework that you need

00:42:44.600 to do what you've simply been daydreaming about doing for a very long time. So if you're

00:42:49.600 ready to get to work, join us, uh, we're not going to do anything for you, but we do have

00:42:54.780 a track record for you to run on, uh, and the accountability that comes from a brotherhood

00:42:59.360 of loyal and committed and successful men. So you can check that out at order of man.com

00:43:04.120 slash iron council. Again, that's order of man.com slash iron council. You can do that after

00:43:09.680 the show, including watching the new intro video for what the iron council is all about.

00:43:13.600 Again, order of man.com slash iron council. Do that after the show for now, I'll finish

00:43:17.620 things up with Sean. Do you think it's, um, I mean, when I, when I look at it, what I think

00:43:24.740 is, I think it's unrealistic expectations, right? I think that most people have an unrealistic

00:43:29.420 expectation that they can just show up or get lucky or that, you know, once they're, once

00:43:34.320 they're, their ship arrives, then they'll have made it. And it's just a series of fortunate

00:43:38.740 events. Is it that it's just a discrepancy between what they think it will take and what

00:43:44.400 it'll actually take that keeps people from charging forward? Cause everybody's capable

00:43:48.080 of this stuff, but they shut themselves off from it. Is it because there's a gap between

00:43:52.320 what they think and what is reality?

00:43:55.000 Um, I think that people are lazy. I think we've been programmed to be lazy. And I, and ever

00:44:00.460 since we were a little kid, um, we we've been indoctrinated, it's been beat into our brains

00:44:07.500 that somehow, some way, someone's just going to help us. And in many cases, some of us not

00:44:12.480 right. When you stop and think about it, like it's not difficult to build these things,

00:44:17.000 but what happens like last night, for example, it was a perfect night. Most people would not

00:44:23.060 have gone out and done it. It was raining. It was 30 something fucking degrees here in Utah.

00:44:26.640 Utah. It was just a shitty night. I was tired. Most people wouldn't get up and do it. And 0.99

00:44:31.960 logical conversation, which is actually illogical would be dude, it's raining. Look, if you go

00:44:37.980 to bed now, you can get a good night's sleep and you'll go even harder tomorrow. I said that

00:44:42.240 for years, right? I did it for years. I was that guy. And this is why I speak to it so much

00:44:47.620 nowadays. I was that guy. And most people listening to this, they're that guy when it gets really

00:44:55.000 fucking hard. We make an excuse and we take a different route. And the difference between 0.83

00:45:01.460 the guy that lives in the $26 million house, the guy that's got the freaking six pack and

00:45:05.700 is ripped is when that conversation comes, when the demons are in there bouncing around 0.60

00:45:09.580 going, sit down, just take a nap, lay on the couch, you'll be fine. It was a war last 0.77

00:45:14.700 night. I'm not shitting you. I was sitting on my couch dressed. I had two layers on. I 0.95

00:45:18.580 have my pants, pairs of pants. I'm a jacket. And I was literally having a war with myself.

00:45:24.140 And I can tell you the reason that I look the way that I look and I will not, I'm not

00:45:29.800 being presumptuous. I look fucking dope for 41 years old. The reason that I look that way 0.99

00:45:34.000 is because last night I made the decision to go. And that's the reason that I have the

00:45:38.880 business that I have and I have the resources that I have and I have the race car and I 1.00

00:45:43.800 do that shit. And I don't say it to be presumptuous to be a dick. I say it simply because people 0.99

00:45:47.940 need to understand that, that it is not fucking simple, right? Paper it is. You write 0.85

00:45:53.720 it all down. Here's my goals. Here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to go to the gym

00:45:56.260 every day. We see this every year, every December, I'm going to the gym. I'm going to make fitness

00:46:01.220 a priority and one bump in the road, one little pulled muscle, one little fucking thing. And 0.99

00:46:07.560 what happens? Completely derailed. And then they're gone.

00:46:11.200 Right. 0.99

00:46:11.680 And then it's like, well, fuck, it's February. I'll do it next year. Next, next January, I'm 0.99

00:46:16.440 going to do it. And that's the difference between the champions. That's the difference between

00:46:20.980 the winners and the losers straight up. That's the difference between the six pack and the dad 0.63

00:46:25.980 vibe. That's the difference between the white house and the acreage and living in a fucking 1.00

00:46:29.900 apartment, living paycheck to paycheck. And I don't say this to be a dick, friends. I say this because 1.00

00:46:34.040 you need to hear this and it's fucking true. It's a hundred percent true. You show me a dude 0.99

00:46:38.860 who's ripped out of his mind. I will show you a dude that does more shit than you. 1.00

00:46:43.940 You show me a dude that has money in the bank, that ain't freaking out, that's not worried about 1.00

00:46:48.360 this Corona thing and all over the place. I will show you a dude that's willing to do more work

00:46:52.860 than you. I will show you a dude who just like last night, when most people would have tapped out

00:46:57.420 and like, I'm good, I'm done. There's a difference there. Right. That's what I think separates people

00:47:03.840 is we get to that threshold of pain and our mind says, stop. And most people stop. And that's when

00:47:10.840 all the victim stuff. And that's why people get depressed and I'm a piece of shit. I'm not 1.00

00:47:15.660 whatever, whatever. I'm this, I'm this, I'm this. No, you're not. You're just not willing

00:47:19.740 to go above that threshold because you know, Ryan, I know this. You've heard Andy, you've

00:47:23.740 heard Ed, fuck, you've heard everybody talk about this. If you can get over that hurdle 0.99

00:47:28.140 of pain, if you can push through that one round, you're dying. You're like, oh my God,

00:47:33.560 I'm going to die. My arms are going to fall off and get the shit kicked out of me. When you 1.00

00:47:36.300 hear that ding, ding, ding, ding, and the round's over, you're like, oh, you're tired, but you're 0.99

00:47:39.780 like, fuck, I did it. Yeah. You feel good. Okay. Let's do that shit again. Right. 0.99

00:47:44.460 I'm addicted to that. I'm addicted to that because when I got to my house last night,

00:47:50.080 I was wet. I was cold. I jumped in the shower and I'm sitting there like sitting in my shower

00:47:54.800 with hot water. I'm like, there's nothing I can't fucking do. And I'm talking to myself. 0.97

00:47:59.860 I'm crazy, calm, whatever. I got tons of voices in my head. I'm like, I'm a fucking bad son

00:48:04.700 of a bitch, dude. And I got out of the shower and I wrapped my towel around me and I looked 1.00

00:48:08.120 in the mirror and I'm fucking ripped. And I'm like, that's why you're ripped. And I'm just 0.98

00:48:12.100 telling you straight up. That's me. That's my own mind is like, I, when I cross that

00:48:16.400 threshold, it jams in me so much motivation and so much like power. This is why I talk

00:48:22.440 about how do you eat the elephant one bite at a time. If you're broke and you can make

00:48:27.040 $10, that's $10 more than you have. I'll do that again and then make 20 and then make

00:48:32.400 40 and then make 80. And the next thing you know, you're like, I can do this. Holy shit.

00:48:36.940 Hey, what does success breed? Success breeds success, period. If you want to be successful, 0.99

00:48:42.920 start with small successes. Start with small little victories. You have these small little

00:48:47.220 victories and you can make them bigger and bigger. It was a 45 minute walk, bro. I literally,

00:48:50.940 I put my weighted vest on. I went out and there's a park right down here and there's a loop.

00:48:54.780 And I look at my phone. Go for 45 minutes.

00:48:59.020 My daughter's called me twice. Hang on one second. Baby girl, I'm at the house. What's up?

00:49:04.120 You good? I'm on that podcast. Are you guys done? What are you doing?

00:49:11.840 Okay. I'll call you when I'm done. All right. Love you. Bye.

00:49:16.480 You know, it's funny. You got to take care of, you got to make sure everything's okay.

00:49:20.280 No worries. Does that make sense?

00:49:22.480 I know that you know this too, having done a gogi and other things like that.

00:49:26.740 Oh yeah. Yeah.

00:49:27.340 You're like my bot. Like this is why those reps yesterday for my client, like he could have

00:49:31.740 have the, you know, the, the, the assistance, but you got to prove to yourself.

00:49:37.520 Yeah. What are your thoughts on that?

00:49:38.840 Well, you're right. You know, we've had James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, Mark Manson,

00:49:43.360 the author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving an F and Everything is F, both of them on the podcast.

00:49:48.260 And both of them actually talk about the same thing that you have to, you have to prove to yourself.

00:49:53.280 And every time that you take an action or don't take an action, you're validating who you are,

00:50:00.940 your identity. So if you don't do something, you know, you should be doing, then you're validating

00:50:06.560 your belief that you're a loser, a failure, a mess up, whatever. If you go out and do the walk

00:50:12.440 at 12 AM and get the thing done, then you validate to yourself that you're not a loser,

00:50:19.020 that you're somebody who honors his word, is committed, is disciplined, is physical,

00:50:23.940 is strong, yada, yada, yada. And so every time, regardless of how small, it doesn't matter

00:50:29.040 if it's go for a 45 minute walk or do an ultra marathon, your brain, I believe registers that at

00:50:36.260 the same, Oh, you won. It doesn't matter how small or how great you won the battle. And then therefore

00:50:41.980 you're more equipped to win subsequent battles. I completely agree. It's, it's when you have,

00:50:47.180 it's like, we talk about, you've heard this for years, like when's the best time to make a sale

00:50:50.900 right after you made another sale. Right. And the reason is, it's like when, when we're,

00:50:55.600 we're naturally surrounded by a lot of negative shit, negative people, negative media, negative 0.99

00:51:01.380 news. I mean, hell you get on anything. This is why I say it's so damn important to get losers out 1.00

00:51:06.140 of your life, to get negativity out of your life and surround yourself with positivity. This is why people

00:51:10.860 like say, dude, Sean, how do you deal with all the criticism and stuff and people? Cause it doesn't,

00:51:15.380 I'm not, I'm not there for that. That doesn't register to me. My level of confidence is 10,000

00:51:21.580 times further than where these people are. So when they mock me and say, won't you share

00:51:25.620 another shirtless picture? I'm like, okay. Yeah. Sounds good. Cause I look really fucking

00:51:31.580 good. Right. It almost like encourages me like to do it. I want to do it. Cause I love sharing 0.97

00:51:36.740 pictures. Cause I'm fucking ripped. And like last night as I'm sitting there, it wasn't me versus 0.99

00:51:41.300 Facebook or Instagram. It was like me sitting in the shower saying, dude, you like, you're a

00:51:46.320 badass man. You did that shit. Even though it was the walk, it was like my mind, that battle inside 1.00

00:51:51.480 of my mind. And that's where, where that's when to answer your question, like, why aren't people

00:51:56.480 getting results? Why aren't people doing that? Is they lose the battle in their mind, which is why

00:52:00.200 I'm constantly saying the same thing. How do you change it? Hire a coach, get into a mentoring

00:52:05.600 program, surround yourself with good people, fucking get good books, be filling your brain 0.98

00:52:12.100 with good content, good data. I mean, these are literally books that I pull from every single day. 0.99

00:52:17.780 Right. And this is, this, this is the path that you've been on that I've been on. This is how I've

00:52:23.020 done this. And it's little wins and little wins and little wins and little wins. And all of a sudden

00:52:29.200 it's like my confidence level, bro. Like I don't even, I don't even register these comments

00:52:34.880 anymore. I don't even register what these people say. It doesn't even matter at this

00:52:38.780 point. I'm in such a different plane right now. I'm in such a different level. And I

00:52:43.480 don't say that to be a dick. I say it because I want that. I built that. I built that. I 0.99

00:52:49.420 built it. I chose it. You chose the house. Nobody gave you the fucking house. Nobody's

00:52:54.500 like, Ryan, you're a sweet fella. Here's a house. No, you're like, I did that. And I think

00:53:00.220 what's, what's right. And you said this about Twitter before we got on.

00:53:04.880 You know, you, you share your wins. You share that celebratory feeling. You share that stuff.

00:53:09.240 You share those victories. And most people, it triggers the shit out of it because they

00:53:12.660 want it, but they're not willing to do what you did to get it. Right. They're not willing 0.94

00:53:16.560 to meet me at the park at 1230 in the morning to go do that walk. And so they don't have

00:53:21.360 the results that I have. And they get mad when they see me having it. It's really not that

00:53:24.840 hard friends. It's not. Well, and not only do they get mad, but the other thing that they

00:53:28.380 do, and this is a strategy you need to be very, very aware of it. If somebody is discounting

00:53:32.460 the amount of work that you did to achieve the results, you, you have to block that out.

00:53:36.640 I'll give you an example. Cause I've seen it for you specifically. How many people have

00:53:40.120 told you that you're on steroids over the, right? I knew you were going to say that

00:53:44.920 because they're discounting. That's a strategy to excuse their poor performance. They're discounting

00:53:51.600 what you did. And they're tell they're basically what they're saying is, well, the reason he

00:53:55.940 achieved the results is because he cheated, not because he earned them.

00:53:59.820 So let me use that. Let me use that logic. You want to really blow people. You want to

00:54:02.820 fucking twist up their panties right now. Cool. Cool. Awesome. I'm going to run with 1.00

00:54:07.820 that. Let's run with that friend. If that's true, if that's the case and I'm jacked because

00:54:13.240 I'm just sticking a needle in my ass. Why are you still fat? 1.00

00:54:18.040 Right? Yeah. Good point. Cause you can do the same thing.

00:54:20.520 Why are you still fat? Think through that logic. Oh, he's on steroids. You can go get

00:54:26.020 steroids. They'll fucking give it to you. You go down to the local fucking doctor. They'll 1.00

00:54:29.320 give you testosterone. They'll give you HGH, HCG, whatever the fuck that shit is. So if 1.00

00:54:34.740 that's the case, why are you still fat?

00:54:38.980 Yeah. Good point.

00:54:39.900 Watch what they say, bro. Watch what they, oh, steroids. You got to be on steroids. Like if

00:54:43.920 it was that, if it was that simple, don't talk about my body. The question is, why are you

00:54:48.700 still fat? If all it takes is sticking a needle in your ass, every man on in this would do 1.00

00:54:53.560 it. If it's as simple as just sticking a needle in your ass, every man in this country would 1.00

00:54:59.580 go find the fucking needle, wouldn't he? To look like me, every fucking man would go stick 1.00

00:55:05.520 a needle in his ass. And anybody who says, no, I wouldn't. You're a fucking liar. You're 1.00

00:55:09.320 a fucking liar. 1.00

00:55:11.780 That's a good point. It's a, it's, I mean, it's a good way to look at it because then it 1.00

00:55:15.780 It's true. It's true. Like I love reversing the logic. Let's just use your logic. If it's

00:55:21.300 as simple as sticking a needle in your ass, then why are you fat? 1.00

00:55:24.400 Yeah. It breaks down the argument. There's no, there's no validity to that argument anymore. 1.00

00:55:28.980 Zero.

00:55:29.680 Hey, so I don't have an answer to that.

00:55:31.240 Let me ask you this. Do you, do you consider yourself polarizing? Cause I'm, I'm saying

00:55:36.500 objectively, like you're a polarizing figure, you know, outside looking in you're polarizing.

00:55:41.540 Right. Do you consider yourself polarizing? Like how do you view yourself and the way you're

00:55:47.680 perceived? Um, there's two ways to, two answers to that. Um, number one, you've spent time around

00:55:55.780 me. Yeah. Am I any different in person than I am? No, not a bit. Yeah. Not a bit. No. And so

00:56:03.800 for me, like I, I didn't, I didn't start, I didn't wake up one day and go, you know what? I want

00:56:07.900 to be this social media fucking guy and figure and influencer or whatever the hell you want to 0.99

00:56:12.120 call it. I just started talking. I found me. I found my voice. I started opening up more. And the 0.99

00:56:17.860 more I opened up, the more I liked it. I like sharing my, my, this is like social media started

00:56:23.080 for me as like a journal of sorts because I was really angry. I was really bitter. I was the gossip

00:56:28.900 queen. I was the fucking drama queen. I was the one who was talking shit about my ex-wife and the 1.00

00:56:33.340 whole thing. And it was by me banging my head against the wall over and over and over again, 0.99

00:56:36.360 not getting good results that I hired a coach. And I'm like, I didn't want to hire a coach,

00:56:39.680 but what I was doing wasn't working. I wasn't getting the results that I wanted. I was angry.

00:56:44.540 My anger was not giving me more money. It wasn't getting me the relationships that I wanted.

00:56:48.700 And so in going down that path, his challenge to me was, dude, I want you to start studying

00:56:53.440 in the morning and I want you to start sharing that. And I did. And it changed the game for me.

00:56:57.820 And what's changed for me over the years, man, is I have become a lot more connected to who

00:57:03.800 I am. My entire life, and I won't spend too much time on this, but this is something that I'm,

00:57:08.600 I'm a huge advocate of exploring your mind. I mean, I know that, you know, like Joe Rogan and

00:57:13.500 Jason Silva and a lot of these other, Aubrey Marcus, a lot of conversation around like exploring

00:57:19.780 your mind and stealing fire, plant medicines, different things like this. Right. Over the last,

00:57:24.260 speaking of the book, I literally have a scenario. Over the last year and a half,

00:57:28.580 like I've, I've started exploring more of how do I get more connected to me? And I grew up in a,

00:57:34.200 in a single parent home. I grew up with an abusive father who was drunk, who, who like basically told

00:57:39.180 me I was a piece of shit my entire life. And I didn't have a lot of value in who I was. And so 1.00

00:57:43.500 in my early days, I was the yeller and the screamer because I was fucking scared and I needed to run 0.98

00:57:48.920 everybody over. And it was, it was, it was a very negative reality. And I think that's why I went 0.96

00:57:54.480 through my depression and why I almost blew my brains out after my divorce is because all of a

00:57:58.920 sudden, like I wasn't saying anything and there was no one around before in my, in my ego and in

00:58:05.980 my inferiority, I felt good in that. Right. And I, I've gone on this journey the last couple of years

00:58:12.560 in understanding who the fuck I really am and why I'm really here and not in some spiritual hippie 0.98

00:58:18.960 dippy way. Like, let's talk about Jesus all day long. But I realized like none of, none of you 0.99

00:58:23.900 matter. And people don't understand when I say that, like, you know, me, you've seen me like I

00:58:28.760 fucking love human beings, man. I love people. I get my shirt off my back to whoever, right? 0.87

00:58:33.420 Right. That's just true. I, my nature is like fucking love human beings. But I realized this is my

00:58:38.240 journey and my journey alone. And if I'm, if my emotions, if my words, if my voice are dictated by

00:58:46.300 sources of anything outside versus inside, then it's not really me. That's a hard, I mean,

00:58:52.420 again, we can go down the rabbit hole in this really, really, really deep, which is a really

00:58:55.340 beautiful conversation. We should do another podcast on this. But like the truth of the matter

00:58:59.220 is like, I fucking love who I am. And for most of my life, I always looked at myself as broken. 0.96

00:59:06.240 You're really good at these things, but you suck over here. And I realized that's how I was raised. 0.98

00:59:10.380 I'd go four for five in a baseball game. And my dad would, you know, all the kids are excited,

00:59:14.400 happy because we won. And my dad would be like, you shouldn't have swung at that pitch.

00:59:17.260 Oh, yeah.

00:59:18.300 And that's how I was raised is I was raised, especially in a religious community where it 0.95

00:59:22.460 was like, these things are really good, but you need to not have these things. You need

00:59:26.780 to shut these things off. You need to not say these words and you need to not talk like this

00:59:30.960 and you need to. And so this, my entire life, it was this battle of like trying to appease other

00:59:36.460 people, trying to say the things that would make everybody happy and do the things that would

00:59:41.360 not cause any confrontation or whatever, whatever. And I realized that I was miserable there.

00:59:46.800 And I think that's really what we're seeing in our culture is a lot of people, they say this to

00:59:50.520 you all the time. They say it to me all the time. Man, you say all the shit. I think I don't know

00:59:53.860 how to say it. I can't say it. It'll piss my wife off or it'll piss my pastor off. I can't say

00:59:59.720 any of these things.

01:00:00.540 Or I'll get fired. That's what I get. I love what you're saying. I can't say it because I'll get fired

01:00:04.300 or I'll bring criticism of my work.

01:00:07.060 Yeah. I hear the word polarizing all the time, but dude, this is me, man.

01:00:11.700 Like I'm, I'm, I love my fucking life. I mean, I have shitty days. I have days where I'm like, 0.97

01:00:16.600 dude, I want to punch everybody in the face. There's days where I'll just sit in my theater 0.51

01:00:19.260 room for four or five hours. Cause I feel shitty and I feel bad and feel like a piece of crap, 0.99

01:00:23.800 whatever, whatever. I have bad days all the time, but like I've grown to really, and I hope people 0.96

01:00:29.080 hear this like in the right context. I've really grown to love who I am, to love me. And, and I was

01:00:34.720 having, I went on a journey last year. I had one of my shamans that I was sitting next to

01:00:38.680 and she asked me a question and this is like kind of a personal story. I haven't

01:00:41.860 really shared this with very many people. Um, that's the gift of Ryan Mickler. He gets

01:00:47.180 like the deep shit out of Sean. All I have to do is be quiet and let you roll, man. You'll 1.00

01:00:51.080 just keep going forever. I like it. No, but I, you know, I, I'm opening up more on some

01:00:55.380 of these things and it's not that I'm not willing to share it cause I've shared a lot

01:00:58.420 of this stuff, but like I had a very, very, very special experience where I'm sitting next

01:01:02.600 to this, this shaman and she comes out and we're, we're having this really cool experience.

01:01:07.000 And she says to me, have you ever been loved? Have you ever felt loved? And it was weird.

01:01:13.120 Cause like I was having this kind of experience where my ego was like, sure. My mom loves me.

01:01:18.820 My dogs love my kids fucking love me. Everybody loves me. I mean, my friend Ryan Mickler loves 0.98

01:01:23.560 me. Everybody loves me. And it was weird because I sat there for a second and I had like, I

01:01:28.640 had a vision and I saw my entire life. And I saw like when I was a little kid to the baseball

01:01:34.140 to this, all the things with my dad to religion, to being a missionary. And I'm like, it was

01:01:39.460 weird. I just had this vision of this timeline of my life, like all the way to here, even my,

01:01:42.860 my marriage, my relationships. And it was like, I've always felt like love was conditional.

01:01:48.820 On me being something that I'm not, or me being something for other people. And then they would

01:01:54.160 love me. And really it was a fucking trip for me, man. And I think a lot of people might be 1.00

01:01:59.240 able to resonate with this. Like as we were kids, however you grew up, like love has always kind of

01:02:05.520 had a condition around it. I have to be this person and say these things in order for people to love

01:02:09.240 me. And I got really emotional. I turned and I looked at her. I was like, no. And I realized in

01:02:14.900 that moment that it wasn't about other people loving me. It was about me loving who I was.

01:02:19.160 It was about me accepting the light and the dark. It was about me accepting that there are days that

01:02:24.620 I just want to lay on my couch and have my woman tickle me. And there's other days that I want to 0.99

01:02:28.260 go fucking batshit crazy and rip everything to the fucking ground and build goddamn empires. 0.99

01:02:34.480 And it's like in my mind, in my soul, in my heart for years and years and years and years, 1.00

01:02:38.940 I was at war with that. Like it's got to be one or the other. People ask me, let's say this all the time.

01:02:43.400 Are you a cowboy today? Are you a race car driver? Like, what is this? Like, who are you? You're

01:02:49.220 always doing these different things. And one day you got a nice suit on. And the other day you got

01:02:52.360 a fucking American flag bikini on. Like, what the fuck? And really, dude, to answer your question, 1.00

01:02:58.280 over the last year, I have come to really, really, really know who I am and love who the hell I am.

01:03:04.360 And I realized that that might not make sense to a lot of people because a lot of people don't love

01:03:07.840 who they are. And this isn't about just verbal, yeah, I love who I am because that's who I was.

01:03:13.180 I would say that. And in my place of scarcity, I would have just turned to my Sean and be like,

01:03:17.860 oh, sure, of course. Yeah, I fucking love you. 0.99

01:03:20.300 Because you're supposed to be that way. 0.97

01:03:22.180 Yeah, I really thought about it. And I realized that I had never really felt love

01:03:26.860 or loved because I didn't love who I was. And so the last, I mean, and here's how I know that

01:03:33.140 I resonate with this. And this is like, my truth is because I've had a lot of people over the last

01:03:38.220 12 months specifically say, dude, like things are changing. You look happier. You look better,

01:03:45.480 not just physically, but like, I've had a lot of people message me that. And it's really flattering.

01:03:50.000 I don't need that. It's just kind of data, right? Jesse Elder talks about data and how everything

01:03:54.680 is just an experience and data. And I'm taking this data and it's like, well, obviously it must be like

01:03:59.040 putting something out into the marketplace for people to think that or feel that way,

01:04:02.760 because that's how I feel. I feel better, you know? And so for me, call it polarizing,

01:04:08.400 call it whatever you want. Like, I love who the hell I am. I know who I am. I'm confident in who

01:04:14.120 I am. And I feel like the more I go down that rabbit hole, the bigger the message gets, the more

01:04:20.940 people I'm connected to, like better I feel, you know what I mean? And it, and it's polarizing to

01:04:26.380 people because most people aren't there. Right. Case in point, the coronavirus thing, I said shit five

01:04:31.340 weeks ago that no one said that no one wanted to say it's cool and everybody's saying it, 0.94

01:04:37.920 but I was, it's okay now to talk about it. And I didn't back from it. I didn't run from it. Cause

01:04:42.020 that was true. Like that was God's honest. That was exactly how I felt exactly what I saw

01:04:46.460 and I didn't run from it. And, and, and, you know, so I think what a lot of people are looking for is

01:04:52.720 that reality is being okay with who they are, how they feel knowing that, you know, Andy talks about

01:04:57.960 this a lot, having depression, like having depressed days. Like we talk about it as it's

01:05:03.120 this negative and it's real. There's a lot of people that fucking have it. There's a lot of 1.00

01:05:06.120 people that struggle with millions and you're not alone in that. And so I feel like me being who I

01:05:12.500 am and getting deeper and deeper and deeper into really loving me and going inward has helped not

01:05:19.260 only me feel better and, but it's also helped the message grow. It's also helped a lot of people

01:05:23.500 find lions, not sheep and find the message, which in turn helps liberate them in a way and open them

01:05:29.960 up. And we'll, it's like, and you know, from permission, like this is really what coaching is.

01:05:33.620 They're watching you live a life and they're like, well, if Ryan can do it, then I can do it.

01:05:37.120 Right.

01:05:37.400 If Ryan can say it, then I can say it. If Ryan can buy the white house and, and, and have the

01:05:41.680 beautiful wife and the family, then I can do it. If Sean can go from a fat lard to ripped,

01:05:46.780 then I can do it. And, and it's a beautiful thing, man. So I, I've never truthfully,

01:05:51.480 and I don't say this in jest. I don't say this arrogantly. I've never felt better.

01:05:56.260 I've never felt better about my life, about who I am, my connection to deity,

01:06:00.640 like my connection to my children, emotionally, psychologically, physically, I've never felt this

01:06:05.520 good.

01:06:06.860 Yeah. It looks like it, man. Physically, mentally, emotionally, you know, there's times in our

01:06:11.740 relationship where I've thought to myself, man, Sean, like Sean's dealing with some stuff right now.

01:06:15.860 Like Sean's, Sean's in a, Sean's in a place right now, you know, and just to see you over

01:06:20.780 the past, even six months, man, to see where you've come from and where, where you're going.

01:06:25.160 And it's inspiring to me. How do you, how do you strike the balance between self-love, self-care

01:06:32.420 and knowing that you're not there yet, right? That there's, you're talking about, Hey, I want to

01:06:39.300 become a machine, for example. So we'll just isolate that element. You're not there yet, right?

01:06:43.820 You're on the path. You're not there yet. So how do you love yourself and know that you

01:06:47.200 have more room to grow?

01:06:48.740 Going back to, to Ed, what Ed says, you know, um, I really like it. It's, it's a, it's a hard

01:06:54.880 thing to really wrap your head around, but being blissfully dissatisfied. Cause I think people

01:07:00.280 believe it has to be one or the other. You either have to be this really subtle, um, quiet church

01:07:06.200 mouse of a soul, or you're this raging lunatic. And the reality is there's some days I'm super 0.99

01:07:11.480 chill. I'm super quiet. And there's some days I'm raging fucking lunatic. Um, and I think

01:07:16.040 the, the, what's really interesting is, is knowing that you can do more, you know what

01:07:22.860 I mean? Like one of my, my trainer, his wife is number three in the world. She took third 0.97

01:07:28.560 place, fourth place, third place or fourth place in Mr. Olympia. She's a specimen, specimen

01:07:35.200 of a human being, right? Just as ripped and physique as possible. And the second she came 0.87

01:07:41.300 home from the Olympics, she's like, I want to do this, this, this, this, and this to

01:07:44.640 change, to get better.

01:07:46.700 Right.

01:07:46.740 And I look at my life the same way as it's like, I don't, the more I learned, the more

01:07:50.600 I realized I don't know anything. The more I learned, the more I realized like how little

01:07:54.960 I really know, you know what I'm saying? And that's a good thing. I feel like that's the

01:08:00.400 humility aspect of things where I'm constantly wanting to learn and to grow. But to me, it's

01:08:05.460 like knowing that, like when I talk about a GI Joe, I know what I built before. I'm like,

01:08:11.940 okay, well, what else can I build now? I want to build something better. You know what I

01:08:15.500 mean? Like I took my business this route and I made a million dollars here. I want to make

01:08:21.140 two million dollars here. And there's nothing wrong with that. It's not the greed. It's not

01:08:25.180 like, again, this is where people go back to that complacency saying I have enough.

01:08:29.560 Right. Like I got in okay shape and I'm going to stay here. No, dude. It's like my body is

01:08:35.020 not the same as it was a year ago, let alone five or 10. And it's sure as shit not going 0.80

01:08:38.480 to be different tomorrow. We're, we're constantly evolving. You and I, our brains are, are, are 0.94

01:08:43.540 morphing. Like that's the thing that's really cool about life is like there's a season for

01:08:48.400 everything. Right. And, and it might be a season of pain. It might be a season of pleasure.

01:08:52.260 It might be a season of this. It might be a season of darkness. It might be a season of

01:08:55.000 light, but like, that's the thing that's dope is it's always changing. And I think what

01:08:59.000 we've been programmed to believe and to think is like, it's just this universal line. You're born

01:09:04.160 live, live, live, live, live, live, live. You might have a little spike here. You get cancer

01:09:07.960 and then you die. Right. Me. It's like, no dude, like let's go here. Now let's go over here. Let's

01:09:13.080 go over here. And all of that's possible. It's really possible. Like I looked at a GI Joe figure

01:09:19.420 and I'm like, I want to look like that. Why can't I? Right. Like, why can't I make this money? Why

01:09:25.800 can't I have this business? Why can't I live in that house? And I think to me, it's, it's really

01:09:32.900 encapsulating that and understanding that like, I'm going to be different tomorrow than I am today.

01:09:38.120 Cause I'm going to have the knowledge from today. Right. What am I going to do with it? You know what

01:09:42.640 I mean? And it's that constant leveling up and growing and expanding and testing things. Your body's

01:09:47.000 like a Petri dish. Just to give you a perfect example, your body is, is literally dying and

01:09:52.360 being reborn all the time. Your nails, your skin, your hair, like it dies and regrows. It's like,

01:09:57.560 you start looking at yourself. It's almost like a science experiment. I know it sounds really funny.

01:10:02.240 It's a good way to look at it. I got my blood done. I get my blood done quarterly and I sit down

01:10:06.460 with my doctor and we look at my levels and figure out where I'm at. And I'm like, well, here's how I'm

01:10:10.280 feeling. Like, what can I do here? Like I'm feeling down or tired or I'm not sleeping well. And like,

01:10:15.300 most people don't give a shit about that. Right. They're, they're more focused on their 40. And 0.99

01:10:19.960 I know you're an old financial planner, but like your 40 year game plan, like I might not even live

01:10:24.240 two years. I want to optimize today. Right. But think about your body. Every person that's listening

01:10:29.320 to this, your body is literally like a fucking science experiment. We're all different. Your body's 0.99

01:10:34.700 different than mine. Your, your, your chemical makeup, what makes you fat might make me skinny.

01:10:39.360 What, you know what I'm saying? If people stopped and started looking at themselves that way,

01:10:43.840 my bank account, my business, my relationship, like, honey, let's try these things. Right.

01:10:50.260 Like, let's try this. Let's go to this thing. Let's go to a thing. Let's buy a jungle gym for

01:10:55.800 the fucking bedroom. Like we're, we're constantly like, there's so much out there that we don't know 1.00

01:11:01.320 that can help us, that can help us grow and expand, not just in our mind, but physically. And

01:11:06.060 like that shit excites me. You know what I'm saying? I do. 1.00

01:11:09.440 I think most people, they get scared by that because it has to take them out of that linear

01:11:14.320 reality. You know what I mean? Which is why most people don't start a business. You know, this

01:11:18.080 is scared to start a business. If you're working a nine to five and you've got a nine to five job

01:11:22.760 and you're good at your job and you want to go start something, most people won't ever leave

01:11:27.660 that. Cause they're like, Oh, there's security over here. Well, the reality is like, if you're good at

01:11:31.560 that and you go out here and it doesn't work, then you just go back, just go back to it.

01:11:34.540 Right. If you're that good, just go back to it. But what if you never do? And you're constantly

01:11:40.440 living with that heaviness or that weight or that, uh, that trepidation of I should go do it.

01:11:45.860 Right. We did the same thing. What, since we've been out here, uh, for 10 months now,

01:11:49.360 I had people when we were moving out here, Oh, how could you do that? I could never do that.

01:11:52.560 I can blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Like, how could you not do it? We have this

01:11:56.520 opportunity. You know, we, we put a lot of time, hundreds of thousands of dollars into this place.

01:12:00.840 I pulled my kids out of school away from their friends. My wife from the only home she's known,

01:12:05.900 we lived in the house that her grandfather built and we still own the place, but we left that.

01:12:13.440 And her family was mad at her because somebody else is living in that house now, our renters.

01:12:19.320 Right. And then we pulled our kids away and they're all disappointed and sad. Like there's

01:12:23.680 sacrifices that we made to be out here, but how could we not do it? Like, Oh, what,

01:12:29.100 what if it doesn't work out? Then we have a cool, cold adventure for 10 months and we move our

01:12:34.100 asses back to Utah and we fall right back into that little assembly line that we've been led to

01:12:38.700 believe is the path we need to walk. We can always go back to that, but we can't always deviate from

01:12:44.940 the path. Like these opportunities don't always present themselves. And when they show up,

01:12:49.780 you better take advantage of them.

01:12:51.860 Cause one day you won't be able to.

01:12:53.640 True.

01:12:53.940 This is something that I talk to people about frequently is I'm not morbid. Okay. I don't

01:12:58.520 wake up and go, I'm like, I'm going to die. I don't, I don't live like that. I'm actually

01:13:03.480 exact, exact opposite. I'm like, I'm going to die. So dude, until I fucking do, I'm all

01:13:08.660 in let's go. Right. But I want, I mean, really think about this. This is something that over 0.97

01:13:13.600 the last year and a half specifically, um, I've really started thinking about is I'm, I really

01:13:18.360 think I think about death a lot and not in a negative cold way, but I think about like,

01:13:24.020 I'm, I'm constantly reminded and I'm seeing over and over and over again, like my ticket's

01:13:27.520 going to be punched. Right. And people ask me all the time, what's your biggest fear?

01:13:31.080 My biggest fear is something happening to one of my children. Right. That's number one

01:13:34.620 for me. There's nothing that terrifies me more than that. But I've, I've had this vision

01:13:38.800 of my death many times and it's me laying on my deathbed. And the reality is I'm never going

01:13:46.380 to make it there. Right. I'm never going to die on a deathbed. I'm going to fucking

01:13:49.160 blow myself up with too much Tannerite or drive my race truck off a cliff or something 0.99

01:13:52.520 crazy. I shoot one open. I'm not going to be, I don't think I'll be like an old ass 1.00

01:13:58.060 man drinking my dinner through a straw, but I've had this vision over and over and over 0.98

01:14:02.260 again that scares the shit out of me, which really pushes me every single day to do what

01:14:09.180 I want to do. And it's, it's me knowing that God put, you know, ideas in my brain

01:14:14.100 passion and passion in my soul. And I squandered it. I didn't do anything with it. I didn't

01:14:19.560 say the words that he told me to say or do the things he told me to do. Cause I was worried

01:14:22.880 about what you would say or he would say, or they would say, or mom would say, or dad 0.99

01:14:27.860 would say that fucking terrifies me, dude. Like really vision that like literally imagine 0.54

01:14:33.720 laying on your deathbed, knowing that you had all of these opportunities to play catch

01:14:40.580 with your kids, to go on that vacation, to do those things, to start that business.

01:14:44.360 And now in that moment, the only thing, the only thing that you would want, like more than

01:14:53.040 money, more than anything else, like is an option. And now you don't have that option.

01:14:58.720 You're laying on your deathbed. You can't go make love to your woman. You can't go back 0.91

01:15:02.580 and ride jet skis with your kids. You can't go back and race the Baja 1000 with your kids.

01:15:07.100 You can't go back and build the tree for it. You can't, you're literally dumb, dude. I don't 1.00

01:15:12.080 know about you, but like, I've had that vision multiple times and it scares the shit out of

01:15:16.540 me. That's like what motivates me. People ask me, how do you, how do you do all these

01:15:19.320 things? Like at that point in time in the game, the money doesn't, none of that, none

01:15:23.180 of that matters. The reality is I can't go back now and do anything. I could die with a billion

01:15:28.800 dollars, a billion dollars and be in my deathbed. And I can't buy any of that. And I think

01:15:35.640 what I realized in going through my divorce and my bankruptcy and almost ending my life

01:15:39.740 was like, as I kind of rebuilt 2.0 Sean, which was before like build this business and then

01:15:44.800 try and live life. I was like, no, I'm going to build a life and then build a business to

01:15:48.120 support the opportunity. Cause I was in Mexico racing the Baja 500 with my son last year.

01:15:54.260 And this guy comes up, Oh, Sean, well, you've already shared this. Oh, dude, I've been following

01:15:57.680 you on Instagram. It's great to meet you, whatever, whatever. He's like, man, this has been

01:16:00.340 on my bucket list to race this with my son for years. I was like, well, why don't you

01:16:04.960 do it? Well, I got two kids in college, you know, we're retirement and we're, my wife and

01:16:09.200 I are wanting to buy a condo and we want to retire and all these other things. And I said

01:16:14.100 to him, I said, dude, I can introduce you to a company down here that for 15 grand, we'll

01:16:20.880 get you the race car, the gear, the whole thing, race support. They'll fill it up. They'll

01:16:25.220 fucking help you get to the finish line. I said, would you even notice if your fifth, 0.99

01:16:30.880 your 401k or your IRA or your retirement account was 15 grand later tomorrow? Would you even

01:16:35.940 notice? He's like, probably not. I said, that's the difference between me and you is that I

01:16:41.100 realized that I'm not going to have another opportunity and this is the year. And then

01:16:45.260 there'll be next year. And then eventually you won't be able to race it. Eventually your

01:16:48.840 body won't be able to do it or something will happen or whatever the circumstance may be.

01:16:54.100 And no matter how much money you have, you won't be able to go do it. And I think that's

01:17:00.060 the mentality that like I shifted into a couple of years ago when I realized like, it's not

01:17:05.380 about money. It's not about the house. It's not about these things. It's like, I want

01:17:09.240 to be able to die knowing I did everything I wanted to do. I said everything I wanted to

01:17:13.000 say. And it might sound cheesy, cliche to some people, but it's so, it rings in my brain

01:17:20.820 every single day, which goes to your other question, like polarizing. I would be remiss

01:17:24.900 if, if, if I didn't say the things that came into my mind, cause I know where they come

01:17:28.380 from. And the shit that comes into my heart, like sending the messages and interacting with 0.99

01:17:34.480 people and being a good neighbor and being a good, a good son and father, like that's 0.99

01:17:40.280 the stuff that comes into my heart. And dude, if I don't do anything with it, then I mean,

01:17:44.740 as a Christian, man, you, you believe like some point in time, maybe I just won't have that

01:17:47.620 anymore. I won't have these revelations. I won't have this inspiration, but the thing

01:17:51.440 I'm the most terrified of is knowing that I'm going to die. And every person listening

01:17:55.700 to this is going to die. And it's not about how big of a race truck you can get, but what

01:18:00.020 if it's just taking your kid fishing? You know, I was talking to my mom not too long

01:18:04.580 ago and you know, another kind of personal story. We were actually out at the race and I

01:18:09.400 said to her, I said, did dad ever, did I ever do guys night with dad? Did dad ever do like,

01:18:14.580 cause I was racking my brain thinking to myself, like I never fished. I never hunted. I never

01:18:18.360 rode dirt bikes. I never played catch with my father. And I was asking my mom, I'm like,

01:18:22.700 am I just not remembering it or what? And she got really emotional. She said, no. I mean,

01:18:27.780 basically my entire existence with my father is he woke up, he woke up at 4am before my brother and

01:18:32.120 I woke up, went to school. He got home at six or seven o'clock at night from work and he got drunk

01:18:37.240 every night. And that was my father. That was my upbringing. That was my, that was my youth.

01:18:41.420 That was my childhood. That's those are, that's what I remember about my father. And at the end

01:18:46.060 of the day, like I realized, like, I don't, I remember that. That's what I remember. I don't

01:18:52.460 remember a lot of the things he said. I remember what he did. And so I want to live a life where

01:18:55.940 when I'm on my deathbed, I'm laying there. I'm just like, well, see you later kids. Like

01:19:00.900 that was a fucking fun ride. And I don't have anything else to say. I don't have to go. Oh my God, 0.99

01:19:05.560 sons, listen, you've got to be good men and you got to like love women and you got to open up

01:19:08.920 door. I don't want to do that. I just want to fucking know that I played all in and my kids

01:19:13.020 already know that. Right. Instead of leaving my kids a shit ton of money, I want to leave the world 0.99

01:19:17.760 three independent children to make their own money and build their own dreams that are living their

01:19:22.280 own reality. And the only way for them to do that is to watch me do that. I can talk shit all day long

01:19:28.840 and I can hypothecate about that. But the only way that I can legitimately do that is to show them 0.99

01:19:33.340 that. Right. That video that you did, I think it was a couple of years ago now with your son

01:19:38.280 that was, I think it was titled, I can, I can tell him or I can show them something along those lines.

01:19:44.140 That is probably one of the most powerful videos that I've ever watched. Like it hit me that deep

01:19:49.140 because that's so true. Like show him, live it, be with him or her, like be involved. I think, um,

01:19:56.440 you were talking about Ed Milet earlier. I think he's the one that said something to the effect of

01:20:02.400 hell is having to meet the man that you could have been when you die. Something along those lines.

01:20:10.740 Imagine that. Really vision that for every single person listening to this. Like vision that. Imagine

01:20:16.140 that. Like vision yourself on your deathbed. One of the things that we do with the Lions Not

01:20:22.400 Sheep experience is we have guys write their own obituaries. It's a scary thing. It's an interesting

01:20:28.020 proposition to actually imagine writing your obituary right now. Like, what would your wife

01:20:32.900 say? What would your woman say? What would your family say about you? Because the obituary is

01:20:37.620 describing your life and who you are and all of these other things. But at the end of the day,

01:20:41.560 like, but what would that look like? Does that make sense? Hang on. Yeah.

01:20:45.600 Please. Oh, it's the UPS guy. Anyways, when you stop and think about that, it's,

01:20:51.860 it's scary, man, which is why I live the life that I do. You know what I mean? Is I realized I

01:20:58.620 might not get another chance at this conversation with my son or my daughter. I might not get another

01:21:04.140 Baja race. Yeah. I mean, it's a, it's a scary proposition, but it can be used as fuel to do the

01:21:11.300 right thing. Well, Sean, I had other plans to talk about coronavirus and all these other crazy things.

01:21:17.560 Maybe we'll do a round two. There's no time limit on this ship.

01:21:22.420 Maybe we'll do a, a round two here in the very near future to talk about that. Cause we do need

01:21:27.380 to address some of this stuff. Yeah. Hey, um, before we go and wrap things up today, let me ask

01:21:32.660 you a couple other questions. The first one, what does it mean to be a man?

01:21:39.720 Just look at me. That's it. Here I am. I don't remember what I answered last time. It'd be

01:21:46.200 interesting to see because I know you're asking that question. Yeah. We'll have to go back.

01:21:48.700 I think, uh, being a man is being able to look at yourself in the mirror and be a damn fucking 0.99

01:21:55.140 proud of who you are. I like that. Knowing who you are and being damn proud of who you are. 0.98

01:22:02.760 Right on. How do we connect with you, man? Where do we got to go?

01:22:06.240 Social media, Google. Find you. We can find you. We'll shake everything up.

01:22:09.780 Sean Whalen. Y'all know, y'all know the game, man.

01:22:12.100 Instagram is, uh, you've got, uh, you've got almost a hundred thousand people. I think I saw

01:22:17.100 following you connected with you on Instagram. Super cool. Thank you. Um, to everybody for the

01:22:22.800 support. Yeah. It's amazing. Yeah. I just said on Instagram. Here's what I think is, you know,

01:22:30.300 I've really appreciated who you are, how you've shown up. I don't always agree with you. Um,

01:22:35.140 but I think overwhelmingly I'm, I'm inspired by the fact that you're willing to share what you

01:22:39.460 believe you're willing to stand by it. You're willing to honor what you believe, fight for

01:22:43.140 what you believe. Um, and, and at a minimum, at a minimum challenge people to think differently

01:22:49.860 about their life, the way that they're showing up, how they're showing up, what they're doing. 0.67

01:22:55.900 And, and if that's the minimum that you're doing, like that's a damn good thing. You know what I mean? 0.89

01:23:01.100 We need to ask more questions, man. Men especially need to ask more questions. We need to be more

01:23:05.560 engaged in, in exploration and trying to flex our, you know, our ego and our pride. There's,

01:23:11.380 there's like the very best leaders have mastered the art of following. And if you want to be a

01:23:17.480 better leader, if you want to be a lion, if you want to be a man, if you want to like lead your

01:23:21.060 family, you've got to like ask more questions. You've got to be able to follow dictates of God

01:23:26.820 of whatever it is, you know? And that's something that's super, super, super important to me.

01:23:31.040 Right on brother. Well, we'll let you go. Love you brother. Appreciate all you do.

01:23:33.760 Appreciate you, man. We'll talk soon.

01:23:37.540 Gentlemen, there you go. The one and only Sean Whalen. I'm sure for a lot of you,

01:23:41.120 he may have rubbed you the wrong way, probably in a good way, hopefully in a good way in that

01:23:46.400 you're thinking about things a little differently. And that's why I wanted to have this conversation

01:23:50.360 with Sean, because you know, it's, it's, it's, it's nice to have the comfortable conversations,

01:23:55.380 the ones that just go exactly right and don't challenge the way that you think about life, but

01:23:59.540 that's not going to produce any results. And that's why you're here, right? That's why

01:24:02.880 you're listening to this podcast. That's why you're engaged in the battle to, to reclaim

01:24:06.380 and restore masculinity is, is to be challenged and pushed and motivated and inspired and

01:24:11.640 thinking about life in a different way. So if you enjoyed the conversation, let Sean and

01:24:15.680 myself know on the socials, you can find Sean on Facebook. I think that's where he's most

01:24:21.340 active over on Facebook, but also Instagram as well. And then let me know what you thought

01:24:27.120 about the show. Hit me up on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, wherever all at Ryan Mickler.

01:24:33.420 And let us know what you're thinking about the, the lineup of guests that we've had on lately,

01:24:37.120 which I think has been pretty good. But of course I'm a bit biased guys outside of that. Make sure

01:24:42.140 you check out the iron council. That's our exclusive brotherhood. I talked to you about a little

01:24:45.260 earlier in the middle of the show. So make sure you check that out. Order of man.com slash iron

01:24:49.200 council. And also again, do me a solid, go in, leave a rating and review. All right, do that.

01:24:55.300 Stop everything that you're doing right now, pull out your phone or your app or whatever you're at

01:24:59.600 and just click five stars. Tell people what you think about the show. I think we've got 4,100

01:25:06.560 reviews. It should be like 10,000 by now, at least. So guys go in there, leave a rating review really

01:25:13.200 helps. All right. That's all I've got. We will be back tomorrow for the ask me anything with my

01:25:17.380 co-host, Mr. Kip Sorensen. Make sure you subscribe because we've got a killer lineup coming up soon.

01:25:22.100 And you want to be aware of those when they drop. All right, guys, we'll be back again

01:25:26.500 tomorrow. But until then, go out there, take action and become the man you are meant to be.

01:25:31.760 Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your life

01:25:36.300 and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.

Order of Man - May 21, 2020

The Power of Uncomfortable Truths ｜ SEAN WHALEN

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