Order of Man - November 04, 2020

The Trap of Distraction, When Empathy Goes Wrong, and the Wisdom of Cobra Kai ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

Topics

hunting fears responsibility as a man success taking care of yourself embrace and perceived disabilities pressure game vulnerability movement Cobra Kai wisdom

Hosted by

Ryan Michler

Raising a King ｜ BRECKEN MICHLER Focus Wins ｜ FRIDAY FIELD NOTES

Episode Stats

Length

1 hour and 20 minutes

Words per minute

187.87

Word count

15,105

Sentence count

1,418

Harmful content

Misogyny

12

sentences flagged

Toxicity

29

sentences flagged

Hate speech

13

sentences flagged

Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Kip Sorensen joins us this week to talk about a variety of topics, including his love of porn, his love for Movember, and why he thinks Napoleon Dynamite is the funniest movie of all time.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).

Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .

Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .

Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .

Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.

Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.

Show only flagged segments

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart

00:00:04.980 your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.

00:00:10.460 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong. This is your life. This is who

00:00:17.220 you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,

00:00:22.780 you can call yourself a man. Mr. Kip Sorensen, good to see you. Even in spite of that nasty

00:00:29.360 mustache that you have going on, the Tom Selleck slash pornstache that you have going on today,

00:00:33.440 but maybe the windbreaker makes up for it. Yeah. You get your windbreaker at store.orderman.com.

00:00:40.700 The mustache, on the other hand, well, you have to be great at one of these.

00:00:45.020 We can't give that. You have to earn that. We don't hand those out, so you have to earn

00:00:49.320 the Tom Selleck stache there. It looks good, actually. I think I like it, but you said your

00:00:54.780 wife was not going to shave her mustache until you did, right?

00:00:57.460 No. She's like, I'm going to grow something out if you're going to grow something out. And I was

00:01:01.440 like, you know what? Maybe I'll shave it. Yeah. She knows there's certain things that I'm not going

00:01:09.420 to deal with very well. For sure. For sure. Women know how to push our buttons, for sure. 1.00

00:01:15.580 So was that for Movember, or was that like a Halloween costume thing, or did you just decide

00:01:21.860 to become a man? Like, what is it? Yeah. It was a little both. Little kids were like

00:01:28.100 harassing me in the neighborhood, talking to me too much. So I thought, you know what? Let's

00:01:31.200 grow this thing out. What do you mean? You're just going to scare little kids now, or what? Is

00:01:36.020 that what the goal is? Totally. With the molestache on. The molestache. No, it was- I heard that one.

00:01:43.600 Yeah. It was Kip and Yolanda. Or no, not Yolanda. Oh, that's right. La Fonda. La Fonda. So that's

00:01:52.720 what, yeah. So I was Kip for Halloween. Dude, Kip is perfect for you. I know. People is like-

00:01:57.440 I love technology, but not as much as you, you see. Oh, Kip is- I never even put that together,

00:02:03.560 man. I know. And then the guys at the gym are like, oh, training to be a cage. I'm like,

00:02:08.380 oh man, this guy ruined my name. But- Training to be a what? A cage fighter?

00:02:12.420 Cage fighter. If you remember in the show- Does he say that, Napoleon?

00:02:15.700 Yes, he does. I forgot. Yes. I'm like, okay. Dude, did that come out? That movie must have

00:02:21.880 come out in 97 or 98, probably somewhere in there. Yeah. Yeah. Napoleon Dynamite. That's

00:02:30.640 a classic, dude. It was one of those movies you watched it and you're kind of quasi bothered

00:02:36.540 during the show. Like it, it bothers you. And then it's funnier the second time. I don't know.

00:02:42.920 I think I walked out the first time. It's disturbing and funny at the same time. Yeah. I think I walked

00:02:46.760 out of the movie theater the first time and then I watched a bunch more. I don't know why.

00:02:50.560 Yeah. And then it just, like you said, got funnier. It's perfect for, I think it was filmed in Idaho,

00:02:56.540 but it's perfect for Idaho slash Utah culture. And if you were from Utah or Idaho, it's that much

00:03:04.720 better of a movie. It's just, it's classic. It's perfect. Yeah. Yeah. Super funny.

00:03:11.400 Well, enough of Napoleon Dynamite and the molest dash that you've got going on. Let's get to some

00:03:15.820 questions today, man. It's good to see you. I've been out for about a week and a half. You held your

00:03:20.300 own last week and had some good questions. And I think we got, no, you did great, man. And I think

00:03:24.540 we've got some great questions for this week as well. Yeah. And congratulations on the hunt.

00:03:29.820 I was following you on Instagram. I was disappointed. Still harvested. I know, but

00:03:35.940 I think anybody who's a hard charger and high achiever can appreciate. Yeah. I mean, I got a

00:03:42.120 doe, but I'd really thought this was the year that I was going to get a buck. Um, and I missed,

00:03:47.460 I actually missed a buck. I mean, broadside it. That makes it over 30 yards. He was just,

00:03:52.820 I mean, just an amazing, just, just a toad. He was a good, a good eight point. And I just shot high,

00:04:00.800 man. I think I got excited. I got a little buck fever and shot high and I skimmed his back. Like

00:04:06.140 I nicked him because there was a little blood on one of my fletchings and a little hair on my broad

00:04:10.340 head. And that was it. But I didn't get any blood, any fat, anything like that. So I didn't pass through

00:04:15.180 him, but I think I just went right. Oh, look an inch or two down and I would have spined him and it 0.74

00:04:20.200 wouldn't have been over, but I just made a bad shot, man. And that was disappointing to me.

00:04:24.200 So back to the drawing board. How long were you scouting or like, were you stationary?

00:04:31.980 You know what I mean? When you saw that? Yeah, it was a whitetail hunt. Yeah. It was a whitetail hunt.

00:04:36.140 So we were sitting in tree stands and tripods. I think I sat in a tree stand for five days. Uh,

00:04:44.860 so we would do three, four hours in the morning, three, three hours, roughly in the morning,

00:04:48.420 three, four hours in the afternoon. So I mean, seven hours a day for five days

00:04:52.360 and plenty of deer, you know, I saw a lot of deer and took two shots. One landed, one didn't

00:04:58.600 that doe. I shot was awesome. Cause she came in and I thought she was a fawn, but I thought she was 1.00

00:05:03.840 small. And she came in and she walked in. I'm like, Oh, she's a lot bigger than I thought.

00:05:07.300 And I shot her. And I knew as soon as I shot her, I'm like, Oh, it's a perfect shot. 0.98

00:05:13.360 And she just sprayed blood right as I shot her. And then she ran 60 yards behind me. And I could 0.94

00:05:18.340 see, I looked behind me, I was watching her run off and there was just blood spraying, 0.98

00:05:22.380 which sounds gruesome, but it also means that you made a good shot.

00:05:26.260 Quick. Yeah. And she ran 60 yards maybe. And I saw her kind of do a front flip and just 1.00

00:05:32.240 dead, just laid there. And it was, there was snow on the ground and there was so much blood,

00:05:36.980 so it was super easy to track. She died quickly. I felt really, really good about that.

00:05:42.800 Um, yeah. And the place that we go, like my friend, Matt Schmigdahl runs, uh, sunset ranch

00:05:48.780 in Minnesota and he, him and his, his dad and his brother, they just do a phenomenal job.

00:05:54.780 I mean, they're putting in hours and then they're putting food plots in and they're scouting the

00:05:59.280 deer and they're playing the wind and they've got probably 60 stands that you can sit in. I mean,

00:06:04.800 it's unbelievable that the work that this guy's put in. And that's what a lot of people don't see

00:06:09.460 is what they see is they see the harvest, right? And they think, Oh, this deer just randomly happened

00:06:14.380 to pop up where you happen to be sitting. No, like these guys have put so much work into making it

00:06:20.520 work into creating a great hunt for me. And I think there was six other guys, five other guys.

00:06:25.560 Uh, and man, it was just, I've been going for three years with Sam and Matt and some other guys,

00:06:32.100 Wayne, Sam. I don't want to name names cause I'll miss somebody I'm sure, but it was, it was such a

00:06:36.800 great hunt. It was just good to be there hunting and it was good to be there with the guys. So

00:06:40.400 there's a lot of value in it. That's cool. Yeah. And I go hunting next week for elk.

00:06:44.540 So for elk cow or your bull elk or bull elk, it's a rifle hunt in Colorado. So, um, that's

00:06:52.660 actually something I haven't done a whole lot of. I've been on one rifle hunt and I was sitting in a

00:06:56.320 actually the first deer, this guy, in fact, right there above me, I shot him with a rifle, uh, on my

00:07:03.380 very first deer hunt. That was the first animal I ever took. So I, but I haven't done a whole lot of

00:07:08.220 it. So we'll, we'll see how it goes, man. Yeah. That's cool. Yeah. I mean, it's, and it's,

00:07:13.140 and those games change, right? It's like hunting in, in the Midwest or back East versus like in

00:07:19.780 Utah where everything's tags and zones. So your prep is like, Oh, I got zone, you know, fish Lake

00:07:29.040 national forest. Yeah. I've never hunted there before. So here we go. Like I'm going to try to

00:07:34.680 figure something out. Yeah. It's like, you know, it's a crap shoot sometimes because if it's not an

00:07:40.500 area that you're familiar with, it could be really tough. I know my brother was up there and he didn't

00:07:44.260 even see a buck the entire time. You know, he just saw does, you know, yeah. Yeah. It's hunting

00:07:50.440 is an interesting thing, man. It's very, uh, it's very rewarding and fulfilling when you make it work.

00:07:55.320 And it's very frustrating when you don't, and especially if you have an opportunity and you miss,

00:08:02.000 you know, you choke under that opportunity and that pressure, man, it's hard. That sucks. I, 0.97

00:08:06.780 I honestly, I thought I went out there with so much confidence. I'm like, this is the year

00:08:10.300 and just came home without it. My brother-in-law Austin, uh, first archery hunt ever for first

00:08:17.320 day, I believe. Yeah. First day he shot a doe. And then the second day he shot this nice eight pointer,

00:08:24.820 uh, and made a great shot. I mean, just right in the shoulder, broke her shoulder first year

00:08:29.600 at 45 yards, just laid a killer shot on this buck. The thing ran probably 70, 80 yards,

00:08:35.840 which actually was a lot further than I thought it would based on where he shot it when we found

00:08:39.420 it. But man, congrats to him. That was very cool. The only, the only thing he did wrong

00:08:45.360 is he set them up for, set himself up for, for a heartache moving forward. And I think that's

00:08:50.040 the hunting gods is like, okay, we'll get you a deer on your first time. Yeah. So he comes back

00:08:55.200 and then he comes back, you know, maybe, maybe he'll just be a, a, a natural born archer,

00:09:00.220 but I was pretty proud of him and excited for him that he got that done for sure.

00:09:03.560 He'll be walking around next year. He's like, yeah, I'm a hunter. I got a buck last year.

00:09:07.140 Yeah, exactly. Wasn't hard. Yeah. Yeah. What's so hard about this? Yeah. That's actually what I did

00:09:13.140 on my first hunt. I shot, I shot that buck with my rifle the first day. And then either the second

00:09:18.120 or third day I shot another smaller buck with my bow and I'm like, well, that's easy. What's so

00:09:24.960 difficult about that? And then every hunt since has just been painstakingly rough, you know? So,

00:09:31.340 yeah. So, and what a great example of life, right? Whether it's hunting or jujitsu where you're

00:09:37.240 like the minute that you're, uh, got a little ego and pride, you know, life reminds you and,

00:09:43.160 you know, you need to stay humble. Yeah. So, all right, man. Well, we've wasted a lot of time here.

00:09:49.020 Yeah. Should we talk about politics now? Yeah. Let's do hunting, politics, religion.

00:09:54.980 We have a president elect or maybe, I don't know. I guess, I guess if this draws out and the,

00:10:00.320 the votes are too narrow, we may not know by the time this podcast is released.

00:10:06.220 What's your prediction? What's your, let's put it out on the line. We're recording this on Tuesday.

00:10:10.360 This is being released tomorrow. So this will be released on the fourth.

00:10:13.540 So let's just go ahead and hear your predictions. I have, I have Trump not winning the popular vote,

00:10:22.880 but winning in the electoral college by a narrow margin. I'm going to go with 279 to Biden's 259.

00:10:32.520 I am at very much in agreement on that. I think I would line up just perfectly with that.

00:10:37.480 Yeah. Yeah. I think, and I, for, well, this is all mute because by the time people hear this,

00:10:44.680 it's already happened, but I think it all comes down really. If, if Trump has Florida today,

00:10:50.060 then we have a race. He's going to win Florida. Yeah. If Florida is, I think he's going to win

00:10:55.960 Florida early. It's, it's over. Right. So no, I think, I think Trump will win Florida. Uh,

00:11:02.700 I, I've got a buddy, Sean Whalen. He's been on the podcast. I saw his post. He thinks,

00:11:07.600 he thinks Trump's going to win California. I'm like, come on, bro. Like,

00:11:11.920 well, he has like Trump winning like 300 and something. Yeah. I'm like, yeah. Every state

00:11:17.240 but New York, I think. Yeah. I mean, look, we can be optimistic, but let's not be delusional

00:11:22.800 about California. And to all our Californian brothers who are listening, like, whew,

00:11:27.420 interesting times over there. But here's the thing is like, I, I, I pulled that up and I showed

00:11:33.140 my wife and she's like, Oh, he's crazy. And I'm like, so was all the people that said Trump was 0.78

00:11:38.060 winning four years ago. People, everybody would have said you were crazy. California is not going 0.98

00:11:44.040 red, dude. It's not going red. Not enough of them have left California and gone into Utah and Nevada

00:11:50.380 and Idaho yet. That'll happen in the next, I would say five years, but not enough of them left yet

00:11:56.320 to, to turn California red. No way. Yeah. No way. I just don't see that happening.

00:12:02.340 So, all right. We'll know in the next 24 hours, next 12 hours. Crazy. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Questions

00:12:09.640 ready. I'm ready. Okay. Iron council. So, uh, we're filling our questions today from our exclusive

00:12:17.940 brotherhood, the iron council to learn more, go to order man.com slash iron council. And then if we get

00:12:23.080 time, we'll hop into the Facebook questions to join us on Facebook, go to facebook.com slash group

00:12:29.060 slash order, man. Daniel Wyckoff, what are your fears and what keeps you up at night?

00:12:36.180 So I did review some of these questions. I like this question. You know, I don't actually have a

00:12:40.320 whole lot of fears other than, okay. So the, the fears, like the ones that really stick out to me

00:12:46.460 are the things that revolve around my children. So obviously making sure that they live a life

00:12:55.700 that has plenty of opportunity, you know, and speaking of elections and the way this country

00:13:00.600 is going, like making sure that they have as much opportunity as possible, that there's as few

00:13:05.720 boundaries and barriers that the government would love to set in place to our prosperity and freedom

00:13:11.140 and just ensuring that they have the best possible opportunities. That to me is, is something that

00:13:17.820 keeps me up at night. It's something that concerns me. Uh, are, are my kids going to be okay? Are my

00:13:22.800 sons going to, going to, you know, do, do what is they want to do? Is my daughter going to be,

00:13:27.700 you know, safe? And is she going to be able to pursue the things that are meaningful and interesting

00:13:31.620 to her? And the other one that I had thought of just the other day, as I was traveling is just

00:13:36.360 at some point, God's going to call me home. Right. And I just, I pray every day that it's not until

00:13:43.160 my children are out of the house. Like that to me is the biggest fear that I have because I grew up

00:13:49.840 without a father. So I know what it's like not to have a permanent father figure in the household.

00:13:54.840 And I don't want that to be the situation for my kids. Like I, I look at my kids and I try to

00:13:59.760 objectively analyze like how much they admire and respect and appreciate and need me in their life.

00:14:05.200 Uh, so that's my biggest fear is dying before my kids are out of the house. Now I don't, I don't

00:14:12.020 want to die anytime soon, but I just pray again that it's done. And God calls me home after,

00:14:18.040 after my kids are out of the house. That is, that is a big fear for me. You know, outside of that,

00:14:21.540 it's just, it's not so much as a fear. It's just something I'm working hard to avoid is just being

00:14:26.220 average and being mediocre and complacent. Like I hate that stuff. Uh, and, and I don't want to be that

00:14:32.280 kind of person. So I really charge hard and making sure that I'm excelling and exceeding and doing the

00:14:38.660 best that I possibly can. And then the next thing is flying. I don't like flying. That's those are

00:14:42.820 my fears. I hate flying, man. I hate it. It's a scary thing to me. Real depth thought process and

00:14:49.600 flying. Yeah. And spiders, not spiders don't bother me. Fortunately, there isn't anything venomous

00:14:55.760 or poisonous that I, that I think in Maine anyway. So, you know, in Utah you had rattlesnakes and

00:15:01.140 scorpions and, but here in Maine, I don't think there's anything venomous or poisonous from what

00:15:06.340 no snakes, spiders aren't poisonous too cold up here for that, for that. So, yeah. Yeah. Hmm. I would

00:15:13.920 say mine are the same. I mean, it's really around my kids probably more than anything else. I like,

00:15:19.340 and what I think is an insightful that are up at nights, aren't things outside of our control.

00:15:25.420 You know what I mean? It's, it's kind of like, I mean, our kids are in our control,

00:15:30.440 but you don't, I mean, I'm not up at night worrying about something that I can't change.

00:15:35.880 Right. And then I think that, I mean, I kind of am though, because again, dying, you know,

00:15:41.840 like dying, I can't control that. Yeah. But I think how's this, but your concern is not so

00:15:49.320 much about dying. It's about your children and making sure they have what they need before you

00:15:53.620 go. Right. Totally. So I spent a lot of time with them. Yeah. I get that. That makes sense. Yeah.

00:15:58.320 And I think that's about how you show up in life. So, and yeah, mine's about the same. It's really

00:16:03.180 about my kids really more than anything else. Although it's interesting how I think it's like,

00:16:08.560 I'm doing EMT training. And as I'm learning about the cardiovascular system and respiration and all

00:16:20.220 this stuff, it's like, I don't know. It's crazy how it's, it's, I'm, I'm more present to my mortality.

00:16:28.620 As I look at this, you're like, wait a second. Like the lining of my blood vessels could be weak

00:16:35.220 right now. I may not even know about it, you know? Oh, for sure. Generate an aneurysm and die,

00:16:39.820 you know? Like it's, I don't know. Like just the thought process is like crossed my mind, 0.52

00:16:44.240 like more and more about these and, and, and some, and so many of these problems that kind of,

00:16:49.880 some of these, some issues that EMTs run into is like, these things are, aren't correctable,

00:16:55.960 you know? Right. It's right. You, you, you know, you have certain problems with your hearts or your

00:17:01.160 lungs or you damage your lungs from smoking. It's like, there is no like, oh, we'll start

00:17:06.160 eating healthier now on K. It's like, actually, no, like you're now at risk for the rest of your

00:17:11.980 life. Right. And the probability of you turning that around or, um, having a long life like you

00:17:19.080 once could have is gone period. Right. Like there is no take back. Right. So it's, I thought about that.

00:17:25.280 It's causing me to be a little bit more present to that. I think that's a great point. I mean,

00:17:29.920 we are so fragile. I thought about that. Even hunting this week is, you know, that's a little,

00:17:35.180 that's a small stick passing through your body and you're dead. Yeah. You know, I, I, I shot that

00:17:40.580 doe. You're dead. 60 yards. You're dead. You were, you're dead within 15 seconds. Uh, one of my 1.00

00:17:46.540 buddies who was there, Chris Ray, he shot a deer and it was super windy. He made a great shot, but

00:17:51.220 the wind got ahold of his arrow and turned it and it, and it shot this, this deer and it hit it in the

00:17:57.100 spine lights out. Done. I mean, we're pretty fragile. These, these meat meat sacks, right?

00:18:05.640 They're, they're pretty fragile and it doesn't take a whole lot to turn the lights out. So I, I,

00:18:10.960 I wholeheartedly agree with what you're saying. Little blood clot in your vessel. You're done.

00:18:15.500 That might be in for you. Yep. You're done. It's crazy. Exactly. Yep. Hmm. All right.

00:18:21.860 Philip, that was, that was a lovely note to start on. It's all good. Hey, you know what? It's,

00:18:29.780 it's the reality. Yeah. We have a tendency to kind of blow it off a little too much in regards to

00:18:35.720 realizing that, uh, it, it, it is the one thing we all have in common, right? We all will die.

00:18:41.580 Yep. Yep. All right. Philip, uh, Capadora, what is, uh, what is it the government can do for a 0.98

00:18:49.580 person that they, we can't do for themselves? Nothing. I mean, what, not really nothing. What

00:19:00.260 can the government do for a person that they can't do for themselves? Look, we live in the

00:19:04.400 most free and prosperous times the history of the world has ever known. There's nothing. I mean,

00:19:10.720 I guess, I guess I'm just trying to think about what it possibly could be, I guess, defend against

00:19:16.260 a foreign invader. Like you couldn't do that for yourself. But yeah, but could you rally groups to

00:19:24.140 get that together without a formalized government? Possibly. Maybe, maybe, yeah, maybe. Yeah. But, um,

00:19:32.000 yeah, I, I, I look, you guys have been around long enough listening to the podcast that, you know,

00:19:37.940 look, here's the reality. Governments are comprised of individuals. So what can one individual do for me

00:19:44.500 that I can't do for myself? Nothing. That's it. The answer is nothing. So I would rather do it for

00:19:51.180 myself and let other people do it for themselves and figure it out. And it's, it's going to be

00:19:55.140 painful. I think that's the problem is so many people want to avoid pain. You know, even as I

00:20:00.380 made that post the other day on, uh, on, uh, Instagram about what I believe about America,

00:20:05.240 you know, people were like, well, America's bad and evil. And look, I'm not saying that America is free

00:20:10.800 of blemishes or that we haven't had our painful circumstances or situations. Of course we have.

00:20:16.360 I'm just saying that we have more abundance and opportunity and prosperity to create these

00:20:21.540 meaningful lives for ourselves and the people that we care about in spite of the pain and the pain

00:20:25.680 doesn't go away. The mess ups don't go away. The mistakes don't go away. It just means they're

00:20:29.580 more manageable because there's meaning and purpose and fulfillment and opportunity to pursue the things

00:20:34.180 we are interested in. And you're not going to find that on the planet anywhere else, as much as you

00:20:39.260 will hear. So I I'm, I'm of the mindset of let's get the government out of the way as best as we can

00:20:47.100 and then allow ourselves to govern ourselves. And some guy came back and said, well, people can't

00:20:53.060 govern themselves. Just look at the COVID response. The COVID response is irrelevant. I don't care if

00:20:58.220 you're for lockdowns or if you're opening it up, everybody's dealing with COVID. Everybody's dealing

00:21:02.200 with the fallout and people can take care of themselves. They can make their own decisions.

00:21:07.360 So yeah, I'm, I'm never going to look to, to the government to solve my problems.

00:21:16.580 This is just not something I'm interested in doing. So nothing. The answer is nothing.

00:21:22.800 Well, and that's why freedom's at the root of what this country is about is it is the freedom to

00:21:29.120 succeed and the freedom, not to, to freedom, to go, you know what, I'm not going to make it a priority.

00:21:36.180 And, uh, I am going to screw my life up. Like, but that's so, but, but how much more powerful is that

00:21:43.200 than not having a choice at all? Right. Right. Those are, and, and, and it's funny. And we've joked

00:21:49.200 around this about, you know, in the past, like, you know, someone made a post, I think on, 0.53

00:21:53.100 on Facebook, it was about, you know, conservatives are crazy because they'd almost, you know,

00:21:59.580 they're willing to die for the sake of freedom. And I'm like, uh, yeah, like it is really,

00:22:06.400 really important, like super important. When you're going to die anyways. So do you want to

00:22:12.980 die a slave or do you want to die free? Like I want to die free and I want to pursue the things

00:22:18.380 that are meaningful and interesting to me. And I want to be left alone to be able to take care of

00:22:23.360 the things that are interesting to me and pursue those things. So yeah. Yeah. I, I, I don't like

00:22:28.620 big government at all. Yeah. And as much as, as much as people want to look at that scenario and go,

00:22:33.660 you know, look at suffering and pain and help people or whatever, I would suggest imagine a

00:22:39.640 country where everyone took accountability, where people took responsibility for the lives and didn't

00:22:47.480 expect government or someone else to fix it. Imagine how impactful and empowering that is.

00:22:54.160 Yeah. What I was going to say is big government, frankly, and this is going to piss a lot of people

00:22:59.140 off when I say this. So be it. Big government is unmanly because what you're doing is you're saying

00:23:06.480 that there's some entity or organization or group of people or collective that can solve your problems

00:23:11.240 better than you can solve your own. And people will respond to that and say, well, what are the,

00:23:15.080 what about those less fortunate? What about those who aren't able to take care of themselves? Well,

00:23:19.780 okay. Then we, as individual men have a responsibility to provide and take care of

00:23:24.540 those individuals. Like I have a responsibility. If my family is struggling to provide and protect

00:23:31.200 and care for the individuals under my care, I have a responsibility to ensure that my neighbors

00:23:35.880 are taken care of. If my neighbors across the street who, who are, are elderly are in a struggle,

00:23:41.940 I will be there to help. Whether it's mowing their lawn or running to one of them, to the,

00:23:48.220 to the doctor or the hospital, heaven forbid, like I will be there to help. Cause that's my job as a man

00:23:54.140 is to take care of myself and my own. And I consider my neighbors, my own. So I don't need somebody

00:24:00.400 else to do it for me. And, and relying upon somebody else to do it for you is unmanly.

00:24:06.960 It's a lack of personal responsibility. And Kip, you and I have been talking about personal

00:24:12.460 responsibility and accountability now for six years, almost six years. We've been talking about this

00:24:18.420 and it's only becoming more important as we continue down the track that we're going on.

00:24:23.480 Oh, but Ryan, oh, these people are less fortunate. Oh, but what about these people? What about these

00:24:27.020 people? They're fully capable. I have belief in the, the, the, the power of the human individual.

00:24:34.380 And for those who are not, because they're hamstringed by something like a medical illness or,

00:24:40.280 or, or, or a disease, or even, you know, even a mindset, maybe they, they were raised in a situation

00:24:45.640 that didn't. And look, I'm not going to pretend that I didn't come from, from a home for some of what

00:24:52.080 it lacked. My mom taught me everything that I needed to be a good human being. I realized not

00:24:58.420 everybody has that luxury. And so I had a leg up totally. I would be, I would be lying if, if I,

00:25:06.880 if I didn't say that I was fortunate in that my mother cared about my sister and I, and ensured that

00:25:11.960 we had everything that we need physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually to thrive

00:25:16.500 and succeed. I realized not everybody has that. So now it's my responsibility as a man who has,

00:25:21.800 has those things and an abundance of those things to then turn around and give where I can.

00:25:28.420 Isn't that what it means to be a man? We produce more than we consume. And so you think about this

00:25:34.600 for a second, as a boy, you're a consumer, right? You remember when you were a child and you have kids

00:25:41.280 of your own, they're consumers. We love them, but they are a consumer only. They consume energy,

00:25:49.360 time, attention, money, food. That's what boys and girls do. It isn't until we learn to produce more

00:25:59.480 than we consume that we become men. And so what this allows us to do when my needs are met, let's talk

00:26:05.600 about Maslow's hierarchy of needs, for example, you know, air, breath, food, shelter, water. Those are

00:26:12.080 important. When my basic and foundational needs are met and I no longer have to worry about those things

00:26:18.460 being taken care of, then the abundance I produce can now be turned into a business like we're doing

00:26:24.560 here, uh, or charity work or charitable contributions or some sort of ecclesiastical service. But if you

00:26:32.680 produce more than you consume, then you can take the resources that are in excess that you have

00:26:38.080 stored up, whether it's money or time or attention, and you can give abundantly to those individuals

00:26:43.720 who aren't so advantaged as maybe we, we are. Yeah. It's, it's just, we have a responsibility

00:26:53.580 and we, as men by design and by definition, produce more than we consume so that we can turn outwards

00:27:01.400 and help other people who don't have the same benefits as we do, who aren't, who don't have

00:27:07.440 the same opportunities that we do, who aren't blessed with good health or having parents that

00:27:13.400 love them or abundance of opportunity or education. But I don't need that mandated. All right. That's

00:27:20.860 the, that's the difference. You don't need to mandate that. I think generally speaking,

00:27:26.580 people are good and charitable and want to serve other people because we recognize that it's good

00:27:32.800 for the collective and it's good then for us individually, that doesn't need to be mandated.

00:27:38.500 Look at charitable contributions. It doesn't need to be mandated. It will take care of itself.

00:27:43.940 Well, and, and for people that might disagree with you and say, Oh, it should be mandated. Or let me

00:27:51.040 actually, I take that back for those people that see a need, what's stopping you. Right. Do it.

00:27:57.420 Do it right now. You don't need a government to implement a policy to take tax dollar money and,

00:28:04.080 and do it inefficiently. You see a need, you see an issue with whether it's homelessness or

00:28:10.320 opportunity for an education or reaching out to other men, do it. Like actually get off your couch,

00:28:16.500 stop running your mouth about what's wrong with the world and actually do something about it.

00:28:21.860 Exactly.

00:28:22.600 And guess what? You're going to be more effective on implementing something anyway.

00:28:27.420 That's, and that's the point is that, yeah, if it's mandated, I, it's going to be less efficient.

00:28:35.800 It's going to be less efficient than you doing it yourself or you getting a group of individuals to

00:28:41.540 do it yourself. Can the government mandate it? Sure. Through manipulation, coercion and force,

00:28:48.160 but I can assure you that anything the government can do you in a collection to your point earlier,

00:28:53.820 a group of people can do it more effectively, more efficiently because you're demanding or

00:28:59.620 utilizing the principle of the invisible hand that Adam Smith's talk talks about in the wealth of

00:29:04.920 nations, that there's this invisible hand that, that, that it, which is the incentive,

00:29:10.620 right? The incentives that we have to do these things that drives creativity, prosperity,

00:29:17.820 ingenuity, new trends, new ideas. I mean, look at Elon Musk

00:29:23.420 with his space, what is it? SpaceX, the SpaceX program. Yep. Look at what he's done in,

00:29:31.900 I don't know when he started that. I imagine it's been maybe a decade, maybe, maybe slightly longer.

00:29:35.680 I really don't know actually, but look at what he's done in that amount of time because it's

00:29:42.160 privately owned. Like he can be efficient. He can look at things differently. He can see things from

00:29:47.660 a vantage point that the bureaucrats can never see and will never see. And how much more do you

00:29:54.620 appreciate your dollar and your value and your time when it's yours, not somebody else's?

00:30:00.240 Yep. Well, the way I spend my time is extremely important to me. And I ought to be in charge of

00:30:07.160 how, how I allocate my time, energy, and resources. And because I'm, that's important to me,

00:30:13.260 then I will ensure that I make the best possible decisions with that time, energy, and attention

00:30:18.260 based on what I'm after. Somebody asked about success later in the list of questions. We'll get

00:30:23.320 into that. But success is autonomy. It's doing what you want to do, when you want to do it,

00:30:28.360 why you want to do it, and how you want to do it. That's the only objective answer to what is

00:30:32.760 success. Yeah. Anything else is less than being successful. Yeah. And in your example, by you

00:30:41.400 implementing that said program, you're going to attract the right people to do that job.

00:30:48.000 Because you have to.

00:30:49.500 Exactly. You have to have the right person in the job to actually do the job. So you're going to get

00:30:54.000 the right assets, the right individuals involved versus you wouldn't, if it was government mandated,

00:30:59.520 right? A perfect example of this is underground railroad. Those guys can do what governments

00:31:04.480 can't do. And that's a really tough job. So who would be willing to do that? The people that it

00:31:11.100 matters enough to them to actually step up and actually provide those types of services. So by

00:31:16.660 have the motivation, get the right people, right? They have the motivation, they have the skillset,

00:31:21.260 they have the training, and those are the people they hire. And if they hire the wrong people,

00:31:25.160 things go south. And then they correct it, hopefully. And if they don't correct it,

00:31:28.500 everything goes south and it poisons the well. Yeah. Yeah. Good times. All right. Evan Berwick,

00:31:38.060 during your separation and divorce, how did you stay focused on yourself and your happiness? So I'm

00:31:44.280 assuming during your separation and my divorce, how did we stay focused on yourself and your happiness?

00:31:51.260 I just felt myself getting, feeling better about who I was. That's it. I just felt better when I

00:31:59.780 lost weight and I got in shape and I got my finances in order. And I started hanging out with

00:32:03.580 friends and picking up new hobbies and reading and doing the activities that were good. The feedback

00:32:08.600 that I was receiving, not from other people, but just the circumstances I was experiencing were

00:32:13.400 better. And I just thought to myself, I want more of that. Yeah. And it wasn't at first,

00:32:19.760 it was to win her over, right? To win her back. And then slowly it became, I mean, it still wandered

00:32:25.720 into my life, but slowly it became, I like this feeling. I feel good. I feel confident. I feel

00:32:32.100 powerful. I feel engaged. I feel like I'm building up trust and credibility and authority with other

00:32:38.480 individuals. I like the way that I feel. And then she happened to respond to that. I say happen,

00:32:43.920 that's too passive, but inevitably she responded to that. Yeah. Right. Like that's just the way

00:32:50.160 that it works. It's the way it works. And that's why I tell guys, if you're going through a separation

00:32:55.360 or a divorce or some sort of contention or bitterness within your relationship, just fix

00:33:00.440 yourself, focus on yourself. And I had a, I had a gal email me several weeks ago and she, she started

00:33:06.560 the email with, I have a bone to pick with you. I'm like, Oh great. Here we go. Cause I've gotten a few

00:33:10.400 of these over the years. And she blamed me for the demise of the relationship. And what she said is

00:33:17.460 she said that her husband interpreted one of my podcasts as just completely shirk your

00:33:25.240 responsibilities and don't keep her in the loop and just go focus on yourself and forget all about

00:33:31.920 everything else that's going on. So she even said that he interpreted as this and she still didn't see

00:33:38.420 how that was his ownership. Yeah. And she even said, she listened to the podcast that, that was

00:33:44.660 in reference. Yeah. Look, that's not what I'm telling you to do. And I, she interpreted that

00:33:50.940 incorrectly. And so did he, if that's true. Yeah. And I don't know if it's true or not. Like that's

00:33:56.460 just one side of the story. You know, somebody could be bitter and say, well, this is why, you know,

00:34:01.140 for example, I've, I've kicked people out of our Facebook group and guys will say, well, you kicked me

00:34:04.760 out because I disagreed. No, not at all. I kicked you out because you're an asshole who happened to

00:34:09.060 disagree with me. It had less to do with your disagreement and more to do with the way you 1.00

00:34:12.300 responded. So let's, let's not like conflate the two, that being a dick equates to just, you 0.98

00:34:17.220 disagreed with me because you disagree with me at times Kip. And yet still here you are co-hosting 0.99

00:34:21.920 this podcast with me. So it has, has nothing to do with disagreement and everything to do with the

00:34:26.440 way that you handle yourself and carry yourself. So I can't really remember where I was going with

00:34:31.720 that. But look, the point is, is don't interpret taking care of yourself to shirking responsibility.

00:34:42.920 You still have a mortgage. You still have children. You still have a job. You potentially still have

00:34:48.200 your wife. There's still obligations and responsibilities in which you signed on the 0.97

00:34:52.580 dotted line and said, I will honor these commitments. Taking care of yourself doesn't mean you'd get to

00:34:59.420 dishonor what you signed up to do. It just means you need to make sure that you are doing this in

00:35:06.580 addition to handling your responsibilities. And by the way, if you take care of yourself and the

00:35:12.240 feedback that you receive is positive, and it will be by the way, it always will be, even if your

00:35:17.220 relationship doesn't work out. Cause sometimes it won't. That's the truth. Yeah. Sometimes you can go

00:35:23.340 to your, yeah. I mean, and sometimes you can go to work on yourself and guys will think, well, Ryan,

00:35:28.040 you had a success story. Your wife stayed with you because you went, look, it could have very easily

00:35:32.200 went the other way, but that doesn't mean my advice is inaccurate. In fact, it will become less

00:35:38.140 important. I'm not saying it won't sting. It will, but it will become less important, less relevant

00:35:42.740 because you're in a better spot physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

00:35:46.160 Yeah. So I don't want to lie to you and say that if you fix yourself, then she'll come back. I don't

00:35:50.960 know if she will. I just know what to give you a better chance. And I know if it doesn't work out,

00:35:55.280 then you're at least you put yourself on the right path for the next woman to come into your life. 0.57

00:35:58.660 And there will be other women. Yeah. But again, don't interpret my recommendation advice of taking 0.98

00:36:05.580 care of yourself is shirk everything else. No, continue to manage what you have to manage,

00:36:11.000 honor your responsibilities and commitment. And in the meantime, figure out a way to work on

00:36:15.240 yourself so that you can be more capable of honoring and upholding your commitments and

00:36:21.000 responsibilities. Yeah, totally. I have a perfect example of that. And whether my ex-wife intended 0.75

00:36:27.420 to do this or not, when, when we got separated and we're kind of through this limbo divorce stage,

00:36:34.220 I saw her constantly going out and, and having fun. And it was really interesting. And whether she was

00:36:44.680 doing this or not, this was my interpretation, but I started realizing that she wasn't focused on

00:36:50.760 herself. She was focused not on herself. She was focused on not dealing with like the fallout of

00:37:02.080 our marriage. She wasn't focused on improving another. She was focused on excitement and having

00:37:06.780 fun. And, and you know what I mean? And it was all about kind of like excitement and entertainment.

00:37:11.680 And luckily for me, and once again, this is my interpretation, but luckily for me,

00:37:17.180 I saw that from my perspective and I thought, wait a second, that's not what I need to do.

00:37:23.740 I don't need a hobby and distraction and fun and not worrying about focusing on myself. What I needed to

00:37:33.120 do is get centered. I needed to focus on how I was showing up in life. I needed to focus on the kind

00:37:41.000 of man I was. I need to focus on integrity and honor. And, and, and that's the focus on myself

00:37:49.200 that, that really became present for me and was agnostic to, it had nothing to do with excitement,

00:37:56.340 fun and entertainment. And you know what I mean? All these distractions. And that is what allowed me to

00:38:02.060 like have a kind of a transformation of the kind of man I was when I was married versus who I ultimately

00:38:09.000 became through that divorce process. So my focus on me was a, like a real internalization of how did

00:38:16.700 I show up in life and who was I being as a man? That is what allowed me to progress and move on.

00:38:25.320 So I don't know. I think that's a good example of when you say focus on yourself, it's not,

00:38:29.780 oh, you know, go to the gym a lot and that's it. Right. And be an asshole and be a bad dad and never

00:38:35.900 neglect your children. That's not what we're saying. Or, or, you know, go out there and, 1.00

00:38:41.580 and get drunk and get shit faced and do stupid things and make bad decisions because you're 1.00

00:38:46.120 focusing on yourself. I think you made a great distinction and you talked about being entertained 1.00

00:38:50.580 and you also use the term distraction. And, and I think that's the line. Are you going out there

00:38:57.900 and are you trying to entertain and distract, or I would even throw in the term sedation,

00:39:02.320 right? Are you trying to sedate yourself from the reality of your circumstances by getting drunk or

00:39:07.320 getting high or whatever it is you try to do, or are you addressing it head on? And that's the

00:39:12.660 difference. Are you going to the gym so you don't have to think about things or are you going to the

00:39:16.660 gym so you can make yourself more capable? Are you hanging out with friends so they can, so you can

00:39:21.580 have some fun and not think about life or are you surrounding yourself with men who are going to

00:39:25.800 uplift you and hold you accountable and challenge you in all the right ways, right? Are you,

00:39:32.340 are you hiring coaches and mentors? Are you reading good books to be entertained and,

00:39:37.300 and, and just blinded to what's going on? Or are you reading a book that's actually

00:39:41.100 enlightening you, which enlightenment is not always comfortable. You think about light.

00:39:45.980 Here's a perfect analogy. I woke up this morning at five o'clock and got ready to go into,

00:39:49.660 into training. And I got out of bed and I try to be respectful to my wife if she's still in bed.

00:39:55.020 So I don't want to turn all the lights on. So I walked into the dark, into the bathroom and I

00:39:58.660 flipped the light on. What do your eyes do? They, it hurts, man. Like if you've been in the dark and

00:40:04.080 you turn the light on, it hurts. It's painful. And you close your eyes. You're like, Oh, I don't want

00:40:08.240 to see this light. Right? That's what we do. It's a perfect analogy for what some of you men may be

00:40:13.620 experiencing. Like you, you continue to put the blindfold over your face because you don't want to deal

00:40:18.500 with a pain of enlightenment and enlightenment. What does that do? It illuminates it. It shows all

00:40:25.080 the nooks and crannies and, and, and, and brings light to the shadows and things that you've never

00:40:30.340 dealt with potentially. And now all of a sudden it's right in your face. And you're like, ah,

00:40:35.040 I closed my eyes. I don't want to see that. You have to see it. You have to see it because if you don't

00:40:42.040 see it, it's not like the threat goes away. It's not like if you don't see it, like a little child

00:40:47.580 thinks when it covers his eyes that, Oh, if I cover my eyes, then that threat can't see me. No,

00:40:53.060 it's still there. It's still present. It just means you're not acknowledging it, which makes you

00:40:57.340 weak. It weakens your position. Strengthening your position is okay. I'm going to take my hands over my

00:41:04.400 eyes. I'm going to open my eyes. I'm going to illuminate the room or the situation. And it's going to

00:41:08.680 be painful and it's going to be uncomfortable. And I'm going to see all little nooks and crannies. I

00:41:11.760 didn't see before. Yeah. But this is the path to creating a circumstance or a situation that I

00:41:18.000 can thrive and excel in in spite of the threat and the enemy and the challenges that come with life.

00:41:24.300 And to be clear, that threat could be your circumstance. It could be another person. It could

00:41:29.300 be you. It could be the man in the mirror, right? When I went into the bathroom, I look at the man

00:41:32.700 in the mirror and that threat could be like, there you go. The guy staring back. Yeah, for sure.

00:41:37.180 Josh Guerrero, Ryan and Kip, in today's society, it seems as though the weakness and mediocrity is

00:41:46.520 encouraged and even celebrated, whereas strength and striving for excellence is often ridiculed

00:41:52.140 and viewed as barbaric. What do you think led to this? And what can we as men do to reverse this

00:41:58.660 trend and cultivate strength and excellence in our societies? I think what led to this, not

00:42:06.640 specifically, but I think the mindset that leads to this is we view other people's success as a

00:42:13.680 threat to ourselves. And if, if Kip, you thrive and excel, you basically just wiped away the excuse

00:42:22.160 that I have to do that for myself. Right? Because if you can do it, then I should be able to do it.

00:42:29.420 So why am I not doing it? Oh, it's because you're not doing what's required. So I'll give you an

00:42:33.660 example. Uh, so I'm going to go back to hunting here. Uh, so on this last hunt, I told you my

00:42:39.760 brother-in-law killed his first deer with a bow. He's killed other deer, but his first year with a

00:42:44.600 bow. In fact, he killed the second, second deer with a knife, right? Yeah, exactly. The third one,

00:42:49.860 he did a rear naked choke on, he jumped on its back and rear naked choked it. So at first I was

00:42:56.940 like, Oh damn, like I want to, I want to do that. I'm like, wait a second. The fact that he killed 0.98

00:43:04.160 two deer isn't a threat to me. I mean, I guess I couldn't kill that particular deer, but there's

00:43:10.240 other deer out here and it isn't a threat to me. You can't. Yeah. Right. And, but that's how people

00:43:16.720 interpret it. Right. Because, Oh, if this guy can do it, then it's a, and it's a finite pie.

00:43:23.000 This is how people look at it. It's a finite pie. Yeah. If he gets, then I can't, then why?

00:43:28.640 Of course, naturally you're going to be upset when somebody else thrives. But instead I just took a

00:43:34.920 moment to reflect. I'm like, you know what? How exciting must that be for him? First archery hunt

00:43:40.400 comes out here, shoots a doe, then shoots a buck. Like how exciting. And why would I not honor that?

00:43:46.800 Why would I not be excited for him? Why would I not celebrate with him? Why would I not

00:43:51.160 tell him that I'm proud of what he accomplished? Because it isn't a threat to me.

00:43:56.460 What is that though? Like, is that, do you think that's ego? Like if we pull back that onion a little

00:44:02.980 bit, yeah. Is that ego is like, Oh wait, I'm not as, is it, I'm not as good as he is. That is what

00:44:09.900 bothers us. Of course. Yeah. Of course. We want to be the best at it. Yeah. Is that true?

00:44:16.620 Is he better than me? No, not in the grand scheme of things. Is he a better archer than me

00:44:22.800 or a bow hunter? Maybe on that particular day. Yeah. And even if he is, so what? Let's say he is,

00:44:30.060 let's say objectively he's a better. Does that make you any less of a person? Yeah. Right. Exactly.

00:44:34.260 So what? He's better than me. You know, there, there's plenty. Tom Brady's a better quarterback

00:44:38.840 than me. Does that mean that I have to think less of myself because Tom Brady excels? No,

00:44:43.880 I think that's great. It's not a threat to me. You, you are better at growing a mustache alone

00:44:50.560 than I am. Does, is that a threat to me? That's what I, but what I'm saying is, is at the end of

00:44:59.100 the day, yes, people get upset because they perceive other people's successes as their own failures.

00:45:07.780 They interpret as, well, I'm a failure because again, to go back to what we were saying earlier,

00:45:11.380 it illuminates it. It draws attention to it. Well, Austin shot a buck. How come you didn't,

00:45:16.660 right? You just illuminated what you failed to accomplish. So we do have to be very,

00:45:22.040 very careful of comparing ourself to other people and what they're accomplishing and what they're

00:45:26.780 doing because it doesn't a pose any serious or real risk to us. And B, it's just not helpful

00:45:33.840 to get yourself in that state of mind where you're thinking you're a failure or you're a loser.

00:45:40.000 How's that going to help you thrive next time? It's only going to place more undue pressure on

00:45:44.180 yourself. And you might choke again because you're feeling this added pressure that doesn't really

00:45:48.700 exist that you created yourself. So I found that the best thing that you can do. And I think that's

00:45:55.680 what this gentleman was asking. Who was it by the way? What's the guy's name? Uh, it was Josh. Oh,

00:46:02.140 Josh. I think the best thing that you can do, Josh is just go to work on yourself. I mean,

00:46:10.560 I hate to beat a dead horse, but if, if I get back from a hunt, cause we're on that analogy

00:46:15.700 and I feel like I didn't perform adequately, do I rag on everybody who did or do I just go out and

00:46:22.560 take a few more shots? That that's my, that's what I'm doing. It's like, oh, okay. Well, I got

00:46:27.720 to go back to, I missed that shot on that belt. Why did I miss it? Oh, I missed it because you got

00:46:31.760 excited or because you pulled or because whatever, it could have been a thousand different things.

00:46:35.420 So let's go through the list and address those things and work towards it so that when I go do it

00:46:39.500 next time, I'm that much better because focusing on what somebody else did and how their performance

00:46:45.340 was isn't going to make me better. It isn't going to make me better to focus on the fact that my

00:46:50.860 brother-in-law was able to get it done on two deer and I was only able to shoot one. That doesn't make

00:46:55.320 me better. Yeah. It don't, it don't. In fact, if anything, it just, it makes me worse because I'm

00:47:01.200 not willing to acknowledge that I need some practice, which is obvious as a parent, but it is

00:47:07.220 to your point, a very ego driven mentality of like, well, you know, he just got lucky. Oh, well,

00:47:13.600 man, if I had this situation, well, then I would have, you know, like, oh, that deer was in this

00:47:18.500 and he was in perfect syndrome. So if I was there, I would have done it too. Well, who's to say that

00:47:23.380 actually would be the case. You still got to perform under pressure. You still get, and he

00:47:28.360 got it done and that's good. I should be excited about that. And here's the thing about celebrating

00:47:32.440 other people's success. I'm going to come at it from two different angles. There's two sides of the

00:47:37.860 spectrum here. One celebrating people's success. And the other side of the spectrum is shitting on other

00:47:42.760 people's success. So let's talk about crapping on other people's success first. If you're downplaying 0.98

00:47:48.340 other people's success and you're writing it off as luck or just some happenstance and you're

00:47:52.260 diminishing what it took to get there, then basically you're hamstringing yourself because

00:47:56.700 you're, you're saying to yourself simultaneously while you're telling somebody that they're lucky.

00:48:01.560 Like I have guys who will say, oh, right. Oh, you must be lucky to have the job that you have

00:48:06.300 lucky. What the hell are you talking about? 0.86

00:48:08.660 That. Yeah. You know, I, I just, I've been rejected and dismissed, dismissed and mocked and 0.78

00:48:15.080 ridiculed. I'm not going to say more than other people. I'm sure there's people who've been more so

00:48:20.840 than me, but enough that it's an obstacle that I've had to overcome that I actually have to share my

00:48:27.900 thoughts with you and basically say, judge me. You know, we put out what six, maybe 700 podcasts at this

00:48:35.640 point. And every single one of them is an invitation for hundreds of thousands of people

00:48:39.780 to judge my thoughts and my intellect and the way I communicate and the way that I look.

00:48:45.880 That's not luck. That's a hell of a lot of work and scary and fear.

00:48:52.140 Yeah. So what, when you say, well, he just got lucky or, oh yeah, if that situation,

00:48:57.900 then I would have too. Basically what you're telling God or the universe or whatever, however you choose

00:49:03.560 to look at it is like, well, I guess I'll just wait here, hands crossed, hanging out. I guess when

00:49:09.580 my ship, you know, comes in, then I'll be lucky too. Yeah. And now you just made yourself weak

00:49:15.280 because you're waiting and you're playing this passive game of hoping something happens.

00:49:20.360 But if on the other hand, I acknowledge what it takes to be successful, whether it's a successful

00:49:25.740 podcaster or archer or business owner or jujitsu practitioner or whatever. And I acknowledge

00:49:34.980 as objectively as possible, the amount of work it must've taken to get to that point.

00:49:40.500 Then what I'm doing is I'm acknowledging the path that I too need to walk,

00:49:45.440 which is painful and long and frustrating and filled with highs and lows. And I'm objectively

00:49:55.380 accepting and embracing the path that I need to walk in order to have the success that other people

00:50:01.140 need to walk. And by the way, if somebody happens to be fortunate or get lucky along that path,

00:50:07.160 does that mean that I no longer need to walk the path myself? No, of course not. Some people get

00:50:13.140 lucky. And that's all, that's all it is, but I'm not going to diminish it because when those

00:50:19.120 opportunities present themselves, and by the way, they will, we're all going to be presented with

00:50:23.420 fortunate opportunities. People say, Oh, Ryan, you're so lucky with the podcast. No, I did a lot

00:50:27.880 of work. And also let me just be willing to admit this, that I started talking about this at a very

00:50:34.220 fortunate time. The timing was very fortunate. It wasn't like I planned it out. I was like, I want to

00:50:41.460 talk about this. And the timing was very fortunate. And I happened to have other circumstances in my

00:50:47.880 life that were beyond my control that led to this point. But I want to be prepared when that time

00:50:53.720 arrives and that time happens. So I choose not to dismiss people's success as luck. It's, it's,

00:51:01.660 it's destructive. It keeps you from accomplishing what you want to accomplish.

00:51:07.340 So when somebody achieves something, here's my thought process, congratulations first,

00:51:15.020 because I think congratulations are in order. If somebody achieves something, I think you ought

00:51:19.100 to congratulate that person. Congratulations. And then the next step is how in the hell did this guy

00:51:26.420 do this? And then you study it and you break it down and you analyze it and you process it and you

00:51:33.620 apply it so that you can then go out and replicate and duplicate the same thing that this guy did that

00:51:38.920 you're, uh, maybe otherwise jealous or envious of. Totally. I like, I really like this. I want to

00:51:48.060 suggest another related angle, you know, cause his question was like, you know, it seems that weakness

00:51:54.920 and mediocrity is encouraged and celebrated. And, and I think for some people, the root of that

00:52:01.240 celebration is that we think our circumstances define us, that who we are as an individual,

00:52:09.560 that we're at the mercy of our circumstances. And, and I think it's victimhood. So,

00:52:16.220 oh, oh, poor Ryan, you know, he was raised in a bad circumstance and well, I'll give him all types

00:52:24.580 of excuses of why he can't achieve in life. And you know what I mean? And, and then we almost like

00:52:30.480 pander to someone that has a tough circumstance and then they may get their story and their sob story

00:52:36.840 and their excuse for why they have done nothing with their lives and why they can't succeed like other

00:52:42.460 individuals. And now everyone else is lucky because they started off in a better position than them,

00:52:49.240 or it was luck or it was whatever. And we celebrate this, this circumstance of unfortunate

00:52:55.900 situation and circumstance that, that you may have gotten as a child. And, and, and this is how it

00:53:03.560 relates to what you're saying is how do we get past that? You're inspiring despite your circumstance

00:53:11.100 that you end up becoming the David Goggins that now every other guy that was raised by an abusive 1.00

00:53:17.700 father goes, oh shit, what's my excuse? You have no excuse. If you're around a David Goggins that you 1.00

00:53:28.240 see his upbringing. Now what's your excuse for not being amazing in life? His circumstance, obviously,

00:53:35.340 well, better yet, his circumstance find him, made him a better man, right? He wasn't at the mercy of

00:53:45.180 it. It's what made him great. And, and last, last AMA, one guy mentioned about having a stroke

00:53:52.480 like a few years ago. And I was kind of like, the thought crossed my mind is like, and I know it. And,

00:53:58.360 and I will all think of even my son, right? My son has Usher syndrome. He's, he's going blind and he

00:54:04.020 has a very hearing loss. Now I could, he could feel sorry for himself, right? Oh man, I have a

00:54:11.560 horrible circumstance and most people would buy into it a little bit. Yeah, you're right. You know

00:54:16.580 what? That is horrible. How do you get people to get moved beyond that and not celebrate bad

00:54:23.520 circumstances and celebrate excellence and striving for, for becoming better? You rise above your

00:54:30.120 circumstance. And now what a great opportunity he has to be amazing and inspire people because he's

00:54:38.920 going to do something with his life that other people would give up. Yes. The guy with the stroke,

00:54:44.620 he can use that in his excuse for the rest of his life and no one will ever like question it.

00:54:49.640 But when he rises up and becomes a better man because of it, that's how you get people to start

00:54:55.360 celebrating excellence. It's, it's well said, you know, another example I think of is, well,

00:55:01.400 let me say this. I think in society collectively in general, because things are so easy, we become

00:55:05.800 overly empathetic. Empathy is good. Understanding, compassion, it's all good. But when we get,

00:55:11.340 take it too far, we actually hinder the people that we pretend to care about. So this guy in the

00:55:16.100 Facebook group the other day, post something about he's in a wheelchair. Did you see this one by chance?

00:55:20.600 Uh, I didn't. Okay. So the guy's in a wheelchair and he, and he was, he was basically upset that

00:55:26.260 women would look at, at him or wouldn't talk with him or, you know, they, they were, they were being

00:55:32.060 superficial because they saw him in a wheelchair and, and they didn't want to pander to him or

00:55:36.560 whatever. Yeah. And I was like, look, I don't give a shit if you're in a wheelchair. I don't care. 1.00

00:55:41.980 Okay. I don't care about your excuse. And look, if you, if you're in a wheelchair and you're 1.00

00:55:46.260 listening to this or, or you have some sort of quote unquote physical disability, I don't give 0.99

00:55:51.140 a shit because it is what it is. And I know people with quote unquote disabilities. I had a blind guy 0.98

00:55:59.040 on the podcast, a hundred percent blind climb the seven tallest peaks of each continent, a kayak down

00:56:05.160 the Colorado river solo by himself. He can't see a thing. I don't care what your excuse is.

00:56:16.260 I, it, it doesn't matter. It's life. Your son, nobody cares about it. And I know that sounds like

00:56:23.520 harsh, but if you can teach that to him, like nobody's going to feel bad for you.

00:56:31.380 This is your hand and it's unfortunate. It is unfortunate, but this is your hand. So how do

00:56:38.780 we use this hand and play it the best that we possibly can? So when this guy is in here, I'm thinking

00:56:44.760 to myself, man, stop complaining about you being in a wheelchair. Imagine if you exerted half the

00:56:49.860 energy about you thinking women are superficial. And by the way, just because a woman chooses not

00:56:54.420 to be with you, it doesn't mean she's superficial. Like that's going to be a different life for her.

00:56:59.920 Yeah. Right. She gets to make that choice. She has a vote in the matter. Okay. So if you spent half

00:57:06.140 as much time worrying about what the way people perceive you as you do overcoming this perceived

00:57:13.120 disability that you have, can you imagine what your life would look like? Like how many mountains

00:57:17.740 would you have climbed by now? How many rivers would you have kayaked by now? Yeah. Totally.

00:57:24.020 Like we all have shit. We all have baggage. Some worse than others. I know people have it worse 1.00

00:57:27.760 than me and the world doesn't care. So embrace that and rise up in spite of it. Yeah. And what's

00:57:37.220 interesting to this, Ryan, is if you had two guys that had equal success in life and one had the right

00:57:44.640 father, had the trust fund, went to the Ivy league college and did all those things. And then the other

00:57:51.280 guy was poor farm boy, uneducated, had no dad. Which one's more inspiring? The one with the crappy

00:58:00.900 circumstance. Who wants to listen to the guy that had everything handed to him and life was easy

00:58:06.580 and he overcame him a better person. Like that's not inspiring. Right. Of course not. So there's,

00:58:12.760 there's opportunity that presents itself to the guy with the poor circumstance. He actually has

00:58:18.480 opportunity to be inspiring to people where the other guy doesn't. I agree. I, and look, I mean,

00:58:25.100 I know it is interesting. It's an interesting perspective, but I think we ought to be careful

00:58:28.820 of saying that. And I see your point. I just think we need to be careful of saying, well, I can be

00:58:35.440 inspiring. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Because I, that, that might come across as like seeking some

00:58:41.300 sort of external validation. No, you can accomplish a hell of a lot in spite of your circumstances.

00:58:47.880 Yeah. And how good will you feel about yourself? Yeah. Back to focusing on you earlier. Exactly.

00:58:55.000 Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Let that be the outcome, not the focus. Yeah. Right. Exactly. Yep. All right.

00:59:01.800 All right. We beat that one up. Yeah. I don't think we beat it up. I think people who are listening

00:59:07.120 and I don't care what your circumstance, I don't care if you came from a poor background. I don't care

00:59:11.640 if you came from another country. I think a Bedros Koulian, who's a friend of mine, uh, you know,

00:59:15.900 he came to this country and his mom and dad literally had to siphon steel. In other words,

00:59:21.820 gas out of people's cars to wash his hair out because he had lice when he was a kid. Like that's

00:59:27.820 how poor and destitute they were. They were stealing gas to wash their children in. Yeah. I don't care

00:59:35.340 about your circumstances because Bedros is crushing life in spite of all that. Eric Weinermeyer,

00:59:43.840 the gentleman I was referring to earlier has climbed the seven highest peaks on each of the continents

00:59:48.440 kayaked down the Colorado river and he's blind.

00:59:51.980 I don't care. And nobody else cares about what hand you think you were dealt.

01:00:00.360 How do you interpret the hand and how do you play it is actually what matters.

01:00:04.840 Yeah.

01:00:06.860 I feel like what else we should end with that, but what's your one question? Right.

01:00:10.480 Bart, uh, free Bert, Ryan, now that you have your blue bell, do you see your game developing faster

01:00:16.640 or more naturally any specific areas and what is your go-to techniques and submissions and what do

01:00:23.660 you have the most trouble with? I'm worse as a blue belt than I was as a white belt 0.67

01:00:29.760 because the expectation wasn't there when I was a white belt or the expectation you had on blue

01:00:37.580 was inaccurate. And now that you're there, you're like, Oh, okay. I swear. I don't know if this is

01:00:42.900 true for you, Kip, but when I, the, the night, the evening that I received my blue belt,

01:00:46.900 honestly, everybody got like 35% better. Like as soon as I put my belt on either, they got better

01:00:56.480 or I got worse or a combination of both, but something very surprising happened in that I got 0.99

01:01:04.360 my ass kicked in a whole different way. As soon as I put my blue belt on. Yeah. And it's true. I think 1.00

01:01:11.580 it, I think it happens all the time. Every belt. I think everybody deals with that. Yeah. And

01:01:15.740 you're, and you're a different target for certain guys, right? Oh, of course. White belts want to 1.00

01:01:19.640 take out the blue belt. Yeah. White belts like, Hey, am I, uh, am I ready for my blue belt? Let's

01:01:24.240 see. Let me roll with Ryan. You know? Yeah, it's good. It's all good. It makes you better.

01:01:30.140 Uh, so, okay. So go to go to technique submissions. Uh, I actually really, really enjoy the pressure

01:01:38.260 game. Like Kip, I think that's where you and I differ. Like you're, you're flexible. You're nimble.

01:01:43.560 You use your long limbs really, really well. I don't like that game. And I struggle with guys

01:01:48.400 that play that game because I want to be close and I want to be tight and I want to like just

01:01:53.420 pressure. And, and even when I roll with guys who play the pressure game, I like that better

01:01:58.760 because like they're putting all their weight on me and I like that game. And then somebody comes in

01:02:03.100 like Ty Nichols is like that. Keegan Roberts, Pete's son is a lot like that. He's very nimble.

01:02:08.100 He's very flexible. Uh, I actually really, really struggle with those guys because I just don't

01:02:14.640 have that dexterity and that speed. I can develop that. I just like to play like the in your face,

01:02:21.040 not dirty, but just like rough time. Yeah. I like that. A lot of pressure. Yeah. I like that game a lot.

01:02:27.620 So, um, if I can get into your side, I feel like I can put a lot of pressure on a person. Um,

01:02:35.260 and that sets up some things cause I can, because I can do that. Uh, but if they start stretching me

01:02:40.520 out and spreading me out, like I think about the guy I roll with Ryan Daggett, who's probably six,

01:02:45.080 three, six, four, super long limbs. Uh, and he just, he just stretches me out. He likes to play the

01:02:51.820 spider guard and the, uh, was it lasso guard. He likes to play those games and he's super good at

01:02:58.520 it. He gets me in triangles and he sweeps me all the time. Cause he just gets me spread out. And I'm

01:03:02.500 like, I just want to be close. I want to be compact. So my go-to game is the, is, is the tight

01:03:09.240 pressure game. And I struggle with space and flexibility and dexterity. It's something I

01:03:16.460 definitely need to work on. Is there a typical couple of submissions that you're kind of mostly

01:03:20.740 looking for? That's, you know what I mean? How you kind of go in seasons where, like where a

01:03:26.160 submission might be on your mind more than other typical submissions. And that's kind of your go-to

01:03:30.980 temporarily for a period of time. Yeah. I mean like my favorite submission is a, uh,

01:03:37.160 like a triangle choke from, from side control, you know, where they lift their arm up and you,

01:03:41.640 and you can grab their neck and there and grab the, and lock in their other shoulder.

01:03:45.780 You know what I'm talking about? Yeah. Yeah. And step over, uh, like a step over triangle from

01:03:51.460 side control or you could, I could, I actually stay on the side and I just flatten out like an

01:03:56.220 arm triangle. Oh, arm triangle. Got it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They'll expose the one arm and then

01:04:00.880 you'll go deep and yeah. Got it. Sink my head down. So I like that arm triangle a lot. Nice. Cause

01:04:05.780 people really step into that one. Um, I, I like chokes like any, any sort of like gee chokes, 1.00

01:04:13.040 lapel chokes. I really am focusing on those. And I'm actually focusing a lot lately on using the

01:04:18.680 lapel as a tool for submission and control. So how do I control this individual from,

01:04:25.460 you know, like shrimping away using their lapel and how do I keep them? Cause again,

01:04:29.540 I like the pressure game. So I want to keep them down. Right. So if I can grab one of their lapels

01:04:34.760 and swing it around their shoulder or back behind their neck, I've got more control of them. Them

01:04:38.820 being able to shrimp away is going to be harder for them to do. So if I can, I like the, that's

01:04:43.560 why I do gee, no gee would be more difficult. I don't train a whole lot of no gee very rarely.

01:04:48.680 In fact, that would be more difficult because I couldn't pin that individual to me the way I can

01:04:52.980 with a gee. Yeah. Yeah. Got it. Hmm. Like try, like leg triangles. I, I suck at them. I have like,

01:05:01.840 I have super short legs. So it's really hard for me to, not that I can't do it. It's just hard

01:05:07.240 for me to get that. The set up is harder. Deep enough to, to actually sink it in and lock it

01:05:13.840 in. So one thing's for sure though, once it's sinked in, you'd be, you'd be done. Yeah. Because

01:05:19.620 it's locked in and it's tight. Yeah. Yeah. What about you though? What, what game do you like?

01:05:26.320 Right now it's just, uh, for me, just, um, Kimora, everything's just Kimora. So I, I,

01:05:34.520 I really, uh, that not so position wise, like I, I've been trying to work like a high mount

01:05:40.320 a lot. I really like a, a high mount where the guys, his arms are extended there. You

01:05:45.560 know what I mean? They have no super uncomfortable. Yeah. It's just legs can't get into the game. 0.96

01:05:50.980 It's just miserable. I like that. I like that position, but, um, but I, I just really love

01:05:56.980 a, a Kimora, Kimora and Americana. It's just always on my head from, from side control

01:06:02.520 from wherever, kind of from wherever, right? Like last night we're training. Um, I'll even,

01:06:10.220 it sounds kind of crazy, but from even from bottom, I will grab an Americana when someone's,

01:06:17.120 when I'm in someone's side control, just to bait them to attack my arm. And if they don't,

01:06:23.160 I can actually use it to sweep them and get them in a Americana from top. So, and so I'll

01:06:30.020 even go for, for a Kimora from bottom, from a really crappy position and they have a choice.

01:06:36.720 They can counter it. Kimora me, which forces their hips. That's a neutral position essentially. 0.95

01:06:42.400 Exactly. But, but they have to adjust their hips, which removes pressure off of me, 0.98

01:06:46.820 which then allows me to escape. And if they don't, then I get my legs involved. And now

01:06:53.040 I have the Kimora, right? So that's just that Kimora trap is constantly just on my head. It's 0.67

01:06:58.000 just, I can't stop thinking about it. So that's, see, that's interesting. Cause what I'm hearing

01:07:02.740 you say is, and I've known this about you cause we've, we've had the opportunity to train a little

01:07:06.780 bit together is you're thinking so far ahead. You're like, I'm not even doing it to get it now,

01:07:12.880 if I can get it great, but if I don't, it's actually just there to set something else up.

01:07:16.400 And so that's a really interesting. Yeah. I've, I've focused in enough on the Kimora that,

01:07:21.360 that I'm going deep enough with it that I'm now having to address all the typical counters.

01:07:28.480 Right. So, and I'm doing enough to my teammates that they're now going like,

01:07:32.560 Oh hell no, you're not going to get that. Like I fell for that already. Now they're countering that.

01:07:38.040 And I'm like, okay, how do I deal with this now? Right. And instead of giving up. Yeah. And so

01:07:44.640 instead of giving up and going, Oh, I'm now going to move to this. It's now like, Oh, actually if

01:07:49.540 they defend this way, I can approach it from a different angle now and still get it. Right.

01:07:54.580 And so it's, it's opening up and I'm going deeper with my options. Yeah. You know, that evolution is

01:08:00.800 funny. So I've been training with Brody Cousineau. That's like my main training partner. Cause we go two

01:08:05.340 to three times in the morning. And then I train with Pete and the rest of the guys in the evenings.

01:08:09.260 Um, but like two weeks ago, two, three weeks ago we trained and he got like super good overnight.

01:08:16.920 And I'm like, what the hell is going on? Like he submitted me three or four times one morning.

01:08:21.420 Yeah. Which like, isn't totally common. So I'm like, what in the world is going on? And I couldn't

01:08:25.400 figure it out. It's just pre-workout discipline. Go. That's all it is. That the end that was our ad

01:08:32.000 spot for the day. So I'm like racking my brain. I'm like, what, what is going on? Cause you do

01:08:38.220 that. Right. You're like thinking, you're like, why is that like, I'm replaying it. That's not

01:08:41.580 normal. Yeah. Yeah. And over the next several training sessions, you know, kind of like went

01:08:47.400 back to the way that it was in the past. And I'm like, I wonder what happened there. Well,

01:08:52.180 the other day we were talking and he, he shared something with me that told me what happened.

01:08:58.280 And he said, well, so I've normally been playing defense and, and he thought to himself that

01:09:04.920 that week that he really wanted to play offense. Well, I wasn't used to him playing offense.

01:09:10.920 Yeah. And, and he said, you know, I played offense for that week. And then you started to evolve

01:09:17.120 to the offense, which made it harder to submit you because you learned. And that's what it was.

01:09:24.400 He was playing a different game that I wasn't used to. So I had to evolve my game in order to

01:09:29.840 meet his game that I wasn't aware that he was playing. And so it's, it's that evolution. So

01:09:36.640 today we were training and he's like, man, I just, I feel like I'm getting worse. And I said,

01:09:42.780 you're not getting worse. You're getting better, but both of us are getting better. And that's making

01:09:48.940 it feel like you're getting worse. It's not that it's because we're both getting better. And you

01:09:53.580 just haven't evolved to this thing yet, but you will. And then I'll have to evolve to that. And

01:09:57.420 then I'll, and then you'll have to evolve to me and I'll have to evolve to you. And it's just this

01:10:00.180 constant accordion effect, you know? So you'll get caught in all these things and you're like,

01:10:03.940 what, what, how is this happening? It's because you've never seen it before. You don't,

01:10:08.320 you haven't learned that game yet. It's interesting, man. It's like, obviously it's physically

01:10:13.220 stimulating, but it's mentally stimulating as well.

01:10:15.860 Yeah. When it's your shirt, right? It's, it's iron sharpens iron. Like I totally, we have a guy,

01:10:21.780 he has a fight in two weeks. And so I saw that on Instagram, we're preparing for his fight and

01:10:27.040 guaranteed, like if he loses that fight due to submission, all of us should feel like it's our

01:10:36.420 fault. Yeah. You're his team. Yeah. Like he, we obviously, I wasn't good enough to show him

01:10:45.000 a level of difficulty that made it hard enough to go against that guy, what he was going to face.

01:10:49.840 Yeah. If we made it easy on him in practice, we didn't prepare him. Right. And it was our lack of

01:10:55.700 ability that allowed him to get submitted. Right. Right. And it's, and that's why teammates are so

01:11:01.760 critical teammates, but just other men in your life. Like forget about jujitsu for a minute.

01:11:07.500 You know, I know a lot of you guys are looking for men in your corner. That's exactly why,

01:11:11.700 like you're not going to be able to evolve as quickly on your own. You can't, how could you,

01:11:15.720 how could you possibly evolve on your own? You have to have other people pushing on you in a good

01:11:20.320 and positive way. The other thing I was going to say that I've been working on Kip too, is I usually

01:11:24.960 in my guard, I usually play to the left side of my guard. So like, I'll go to my left hip, for example,

01:11:30.480 and I'll play to that side. Which is the typical side that most guys pass on.

01:11:36.640 Right. Cause they're right-handed. Yeah. So I guess maybe, I don't know, but whatever.

01:11:41.700 So lately I've really been focusing on don't play to that, but it's super hard because when I play to

01:11:49.560 my right side, I'm way worse on my right. Of course, obviously. Yeah. And so ego comes in,

01:11:55.820 it's like, just go back, just go back to like, no, no, no, no, no. I want to win right now.

01:12:00.400 Yeah. Right. And that's not the goal. See, that's the problem we have is we think, okay,

01:12:04.680 I want to win right now. And that sounds like it's the goal, but it's not. And jujitsu,

01:12:09.220 the goal is not necessarily, unless you're in a tournament to submit your part, your training

01:12:14.160 partner. That's not the goal of training. The goal of the tournament is that yes, but the goal of

01:12:20.820 training is not to submit your training partner. And I'm learning that because I thought that was the

01:12:24.940 goal. It's not, it's to make yourself better, which means that you got to stop playing to the left

01:12:30.580 and start playing your guard to the right. Because yes, you may not submit him, but it doesn't matter

01:12:35.360 because that's not the goal. The goal is to get better. And that is making you better. Or if I

01:12:40.100 always go after the same choke, it's like, I know I can get this. So why would I do that?

01:12:46.020 Because it's easy. Yeah. And it feels good when you win and you tap somebody. It's like, okay,

01:12:50.880 don't do that anymore. Like that's cheating at this point. Cause you know, you can get it. So

01:12:54.520 just go onto something else and get better. So we got to, and I'm trying to liken this to life in

01:13:00.300 general is stop cheating to your strengths. I mean, yes, when it counts, yes, use your strengths

01:13:06.380 when it counts. But when you're training shore up weaknesses, shore up other areas, make yourself

01:13:12.480 more capable so that when real life hits, you'll be able to deal with it with as like a broad array

01:13:20.740 of tools in your, your arsenal that you can use. Yeah. And, and the more you avoid your weaknesses,

01:13:26.440 the longer they'll be continue to be a weakness. And everybody will exploit them.

01:13:32.600 Yeah. Like you will be, I mean, this is, I mean, you and I have talked about this, but this is the

01:13:38.020 idea of vulnerability. Like why, why would we be vulnerable? The only reason to be vulnerable as a

01:13:45.260 man is so that you can acknowledge it and actually shore up your vulnerability. Yeah. That's the only

01:13:53.200 reason like men don't cry to cry. Men don't express emotion or get ups. That's not what we do. Yes.

01:14:00.440 We will be emotional at times. And there's times where it's certainly appropriate, but I don't like

01:14:05.060 the vulnerability movement because people do it just for the sake of being vulnerable and they score

01:14:10.440 virtue points. Yeah. It's without purpose. Right. So I'm all for being vulnerable if you're only doing

01:14:19.140 it to say, yeah, I suck at this. So I want to acknowledge it so that I don't suck at this for 0.94

01:14:24.440 the rest of my life. That's the only reason a man would be vulnerable. Otherwise, why would you tell

01:14:30.220 your enemy your position? Oh, you know what? Like 90% of our, our, our, our place is secure, but you

01:14:37.060 know, Hey, uh, to make this a more fair fight, let me tell you the 10% that's not shored up. And I 0.74

01:14:41.980 would, I would have you and suggest that you attack this place over here. Like, why would you ever do

01:14:45.700 that? Of course you wouldn't do that. What you would do is you would exert some effort towards

01:14:49.320 shoring up that 10%, but you have to acknowledge it, but only to cement it, to, to shore it up.

01:14:54.980 Yeah. And instead we're like, Oh no, no, they'll celebrate the fact that I'm a victim. And then

01:14:59.700 they'll feel guilty that they had opportunities. And then they'll leave us alone because we're virtuous.

01:15:03.720 Oh, this isn't a fair fight. I don't want to exploit that. Cause it's not a fair fight.

01:15:09.300 Yeah. That's funny. I, uh, on that note, I've been, uh, I, I have been watching Cobra Kai by the

01:15:16.580 way, Kip. It's great. So good. So good. Oh, I just want to be bad-ass. Yeah. I know. And that's

01:15:26.020 the best part about it is he's so politically incorrect. Like, and, and this is the insight.

01:15:32.000 Here's, here's some Cobra Kai of wisdom for everybody. And this is what makes this show great

01:15:36.320 is he's a complete jerk. He says things that are, you know, he attacks things that people can't 1.00

01:15:43.640 change. Like he's attacking a kid with a cuff lip, cuff lip. So true, man. But here's, what's so cool

01:15:50.340 about it is he tells them what they need to hear to become better and move beyond it. Right. And,

01:15:57.820 and, and that's where there's some truth in this show. You're like, there's some truth to that

01:16:03.840 approach, you know? It's all true. Like, yeah, it's, it's totally uncomfortable and it makes you

01:16:08.520 cringe. You're like, Ooh, and then you're like, but that's actually a pretty good point. Yeah. Yeah.

01:16:14.820 And he's learned it too, but not, he's learning that everything's not about just being bad-ass,

01:16:19.160 you know, but that's the part I don't agree with. Cobra Kai wisdom. That's the title of this

01:16:26.300 podcast, guys. Cobra Kai wisdom. And we should just dissect that show and it was go over certain

01:16:31.680 segments of, of wisdom. That actually would, that Johnny Lawrence drops. How many episodes or how

01:16:36.760 many seasons? Cause there's two on Netflix, right? Just two seasons. And I think season three starts in

01:16:41.720 January. And by the way, I want to, I want to be really clear. I'm not a Netflix bet. I've never

01:16:46.720 watched even game of Thrones or all these. So this is like the only like serious thing that I've ever

01:16:52.680 even like watched. And I, it's super great. It's all right. So here's the real question. Are you team

01:16:58.520 Miyagi dough or Cobra Kai? Oh, Cobra Kai all day. For sure. For sure. Cobra Kai all day. If any of you

01:17:06.480 think differently, stop listening, unsubscribe to this podcast. All right, let's wrap it up, man.

01:17:13.920 All right. So guys, we mentioned this earlier, but to submit questions for future AMAs or just to

01:17:21.800 join the conversation, you can do so on Facebook at facebook.com slash order of man. And of course,

01:17:27.600 to learn more about the iron council, our exclusive brotherhood, go to order of man.com slash iron

01:17:32.580 council. And, you know, one of the questions earlier, just to go back to it was how do we,

01:17:39.260 how do we take this coddling of America and get past the celebration of mediocrity and victimhood

01:17:47.320 and rise up and celebrate masculinity and strength and growth and rising above circumstances?

01:17:55.540 You get on the court in life and you take action. And one of the actions that you guys can take is

01:18:01.060 sharing this message because that's literally what this podcast is all about. And you could do so by

01:18:06.300 joining us on YouTube, subscribing to the podcast, sharing episodes. I'm assuming it's Cody or you,

01:18:13.360 but like we have snippets of different aspects of podcasts. So you can get a short one minute,

01:18:19.360 two minute, five minute video of a particular subject and easily share that with people

01:18:24.280 where they don't have to listen to the whole, you know, hour or hour and a half of the podcast.

01:18:29.020 So look to those YouTube videos, share messages and, and help us spread the word. And, um, another

01:18:36.680 way you can do that is follow Mr. Mickler on Instagram and, uh, Twitter at Ryan Mickler. And

01:18:42.080 of course, uh, wearing the swag. So that's right. I thought you were going to say the way you do that

01:18:46.840 is by being bad-ass by being bad-ass. I should actually. That's I'm, I'm thinking of a t-shirt 0.56

01:18:53.480 all of a sudden. Yeah. Heck yeah. All right, guys. Hey, look, we appreciate you. We're glad

01:18:58.820 to have you guys in iron council. And even if you're not, you know, we're glad you're listening

01:19:02.580 and tuning in, showing up as fathers and husbands and leaders in your community and you're leading

01:19:07.020 your families and your people. Well, and that's what we need. I mean, we're, we're right on the

01:19:10.880 heels of this presidential election, obviously turbulent times. Um, you know, I don't see it getting

01:19:16.900 better regardless of who wins. I just don't, I see it becoming more divisive, more, more polarizing.

01:19:23.480 And I think there's a real opportunity in these interesting times to step up and lead with

01:19:30.620 dignity and class and honor and respect and, and, and do the right things. And, and we have an

01:19:36.000 opportunity to do that. And it starts with you first. We talked a lot about that in the podcast,

01:19:39.520 and then it starts with your family from there. And then it starts to trickle out into your

01:19:44.000 neighborhoods, your communities, and potentially even a movement similar to what we're doing here,

01:19:48.360 but it starts with you. And that's what this whole podcast is about. So, uh, we'll be back

01:19:53.160 on Friday for the Friday field notes with a, uh, either second term president or a new president,

01:20:00.920 which should be interesting regardless. And, uh, we'll just keep driving on. It doesn't matter.

01:20:06.520 We're going to keep driving on and doing the things that we do. So we appreciate you guys.

01:20:09.200 And like I said, we'll be back Friday until then go out there, take action and become the man.

01:20:13.020 Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your life

01:20:18.600 and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.

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