Order of Man - The Trap of Distraction, When Empathy Goes Wrong, and the Wisdom of Cobra Kai

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart

00:00:04.980 your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.

00:00:10.460 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong. This is your life. This is who

00:00:17.220 you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,

00:00:22.780 you can call yourself a man. Mr. Kip Sorensen, good to see you. Even in spite of that nasty

00:00:29.360 mustache that you have going on, the Tom Selleck slash pornstache that you have going on today,

00:00:33.440 but maybe the windbreaker makes up for it. Yeah. You get your windbreaker at store.orderman.com.

00:00:40.700 The mustache, on the other hand, well, you have to be great at one of these.

00:00:45.020 We can't give that. You have to earn that. We don't hand those out, so you have to earn

00:00:49.320 the Tom Selleck stache there. It looks good, actually. I think I like it, but you said your

00:00:54.780 wife was not going to shave her mustache until you did, right?

00:00:57.460 No. She's like, I'm going to grow something out if you're going to grow something out. And I was

00:01:01.440 like, you know what? Maybe I'll shave it. Yeah. She knows there's certain things that I'm not going

00:01:09.420 to deal with very well. For sure. For sure. Women know how to push our buttons, for sure.

00:01:15.580 So was that for Movember, or was that like a Halloween costume thing, or did you just decide

00:01:21.860 to become a man? Like, what is it? Yeah. It was a little both. Little kids were like

00:01:28.100 harassing me in the neighborhood, talking to me too much. So I thought, you know what? Let's

00:01:31.200 grow this thing out. What do you mean? You're just going to scare little kids now, or what? Is

00:01:36.020 that what the goal is? Totally. With the molestache on. The molestache. No, it was- I heard that one.

00:01:43.600 Yeah. It was Kip and Yolanda. Or no, not Yolanda. Oh, that's right. La Fonda. La Fonda. So that's

00:01:52.720 what, yeah. So I was Kip for Halloween. Dude, Kip is perfect for you. I know. People is like-

00:01:57.440 I love technology, but not as much as you, you see. Oh, Kip is- I never even put that together,

00:02:03.560 man. I know. And then the guys at the gym are like, oh, training to be a cage. I'm like,

00:02:08.380 oh man, this guy ruined my name. But- Training to be a what? A cage fighter?

00:02:12.420 Cage fighter. If you remember in the show- Does he say that, Napoleon?

00:02:15.700 Yes, he does. I forgot. Yes. I'm like, okay. Dude, did that come out? That movie must have

00:02:21.880 come out in 97 or 98, probably somewhere in there. Yeah. Yeah. Napoleon Dynamite. That's

00:02:30.640 a classic, dude. It was one of those movies you watched it and you're kind of quasi bothered

00:02:36.540 during the show. Like it, it bothers you. And then it's funnier the second time. I don't know.

00:02:42.920 I think I walked out the first time. It's disturbing and funny at the same time. Yeah. I think I walked

00:02:46.760 out of the movie theater the first time and then I watched a bunch more. I don't know why.

00:02:50.560 Yeah. And then it just, like you said, got funnier. It's perfect for, I think it was filmed in Idaho,

00:02:56.540 but it's perfect for Idaho slash Utah culture. And if you were from Utah or Idaho, it's that much

00:03:04.720 better of a movie. It's just, it's classic. It's perfect. Yeah. Yeah. Super funny.

00:03:11.400 Well, enough of Napoleon Dynamite and the molest dash that you've got going on. Let's get to some

00:03:15.820 questions today, man. It's good to see you. I've been out for about a week and a half. You held your

00:03:20.300 own last week and had some good questions. And I think we got, no, you did great, man. And I think

00:03:24.540 we've got some great questions for this week as well. Yeah. And congratulations on the hunt.

00:03:29.820 I was following you on Instagram. I was disappointed. Still harvested. I know, but

00:03:35.940 I think anybody who's a hard charger and high achiever can appreciate. Yeah. I mean, I got a

00:03:42.120 doe, but I'd really thought this was the year that I was going to get a buck. Um, and I missed,

00:03:47.460 I actually missed a buck. I mean, broadside it. That makes it over 30 yards. He was just,

00:03:52.820 I mean, just an amazing, just, just a toad. He was a good, a good eight point. And I just shot high,

00:04:00.800 man. I think I got excited. I got a little buck fever and shot high and I skimmed his back. Like

00:04:06.140 I nicked him because there was a little blood on one of my fletchings and a little hair on my broad

00:04:10.340 head. And that was it. But I didn't get any blood, any fat, anything like that. So I didn't pass through

00:04:15.180 him, but I think I just went right. Oh, look an inch or two down and I would have spined him and it

00:04:20.200 wouldn't have been over, but I just made a bad shot, man. And that was disappointing to me.

00:04:24.200 So back to the drawing board. How long were you scouting or like, were you stationary?

00:04:31.980 You know what I mean? When you saw that? Yeah, it was a whitetail hunt. Yeah. It was a whitetail hunt.

00:04:36.140 So we were sitting in tree stands and tripods. I think I sat in a tree stand for five days. Uh,

00:04:44.860 so we would do three, four hours in the morning, three, three hours, roughly in the morning,

00:04:48.420 three, four hours in the afternoon. So I mean, seven hours a day for five days

00:04:52.360 and plenty of deer, you know, I saw a lot of deer and took two shots. One landed, one didn't

00:04:58.600 that doe. I shot was awesome. Cause she came in and I thought she was a fawn, but I thought she was

00:05:03.840 small. And she came in and she walked in. I'm like, Oh, she's a lot bigger than I thought.

00:05:07.300 And I shot her. And I knew as soon as I shot her, I'm like, Oh, it's a perfect shot.

00:05:13.360 And she just sprayed blood right as I shot her. And then she ran 60 yards behind me. And I could

00:05:18.340 see, I looked behind me, I was watching her run off and there was just blood spraying,

00:05:22.380 which sounds gruesome, but it also means that you made a good shot.

00:05:26.260 Quick. Yeah. And she ran 60 yards maybe. And I saw her kind of do a front flip and just

00:05:32.240 dead, just laid there. And it was, there was snow on the ground and there was so much blood,

00:05:36.980 so it was super easy to track. She died quickly. I felt really, really good about that.

00:05:42.800 Um, yeah. And the place that we go, like my friend, Matt Schmigdahl runs, uh, sunset ranch

00:05:48.780 in Minnesota and he, him and his, his dad and his brother, they just do a phenomenal job.

00:05:54.780 I mean, they're putting in hours and then they're putting food plots in and they're scouting the

00:05:59.280 deer and they're playing the wind and they've got probably 60 stands that you can sit in. I mean,

00:06:04.800 it's unbelievable that the work that this guy's put in. And that's what a lot of people don't see

00:06:09.460 is what they see is they see the harvest, right? And they think, Oh, this deer just randomly happened

00:06:14.380 to pop up where you happen to be sitting. No, like these guys have put so much work into making it

00:06:20.520 work into creating a great hunt for me. And I think there was six other guys, five other guys.

00:06:25.560 Uh, and man, it was just, I've been going for three years with Sam and Matt and some other guys,

00:06:32.100 Wayne, Sam. I don't want to name names cause I'll miss somebody I'm sure, but it was, it was such a

00:06:36.800 great hunt. It was just good to be there hunting and it was good to be there with the guys. So

00:06:40.400 there's a lot of value in it. That's cool. Yeah. And I go hunting next week for elk.

00:06:44.540 So for elk cow or your bull elk or bull elk, it's a rifle hunt in Colorado. So, um, that's

00:06:52.660 actually something I haven't done a whole lot of. I've been on one rifle hunt and I was sitting in a

00:06:56.320 actually the first deer, this guy, in fact, right there above me, I shot him with a rifle, uh, on my

00:07:03.380 very first deer hunt. That was the first animal I ever took. So I, but I haven't done a whole lot of

00:07:08.220 it. So we'll, we'll see how it goes, man. Yeah. That's cool. Yeah. I mean, it's, and it's,

00:07:13.140 and those games change, right? It's like hunting in, in the Midwest or back East versus like in

00:07:19.780 Utah where everything's tags and zones. So your prep is like, Oh, I got zone, you know, fish Lake

00:07:29.040 national forest. Yeah. I've never hunted there before. So here we go. Like I'm going to try to

00:07:34.680 figure something out. Yeah. It's like, you know, it's a crap shoot sometimes because if it's not an

00:07:40.500 area that you're familiar with, it could be really tough. I know my brother was up there and he didn't

00:07:44.260 even see a buck the entire time. You know, he just saw does, you know, yeah. Yeah. It's hunting

00:07:50.440 is an interesting thing, man. It's very, uh, it's very rewarding and fulfilling when you make it work.

00:07:55.320 And it's very frustrating when you don't, and especially if you have an opportunity and you miss,

00:08:02.000 you know, you choke under that opportunity and that pressure, man, it's hard. That sucks. I,

00:08:06.780 I honestly, I thought I went out there with so much confidence. I'm like, this is the year

00:08:10.300 and just came home without it. My brother-in-law Austin, uh, first archery hunt ever for first

00:08:17.320 day, I believe. Yeah. First day he shot a doe. And then the second day he shot this nice eight pointer,

00:08:24.820 uh, and made a great shot. I mean, just right in the shoulder, broke her shoulder first year

00:08:29.600 at 45 yards, just laid a killer shot on this buck. The thing ran probably 70, 80 yards,

00:08:35.840 which actually was a lot further than I thought it would based on where he shot it when we found

00:08:39.420 it. But man, congrats to him. That was very cool. The only, the only thing he did wrong

00:08:45.360 is he set them up for, set himself up for, for a heartache moving forward. And I think that's

00:08:50.040 the hunting gods is like, okay, we'll get you a deer on your first time. Yeah. So he comes back

00:08:55.200 and then he comes back, you know, maybe, maybe he'll just be a, a, a natural born archer,

00:09:00.220 but I was pretty proud of him and excited for him that he got that done for sure.

00:09:03.560 He'll be walking around next year. He's like, yeah, I'm a hunter. I got a buck last year.

00:09:07.140 Yeah, exactly. Wasn't hard. Yeah. Yeah. What's so hard about this? Yeah. That's actually what I did

00:09:13.140 on my first hunt. I shot, I shot that buck with my rifle the first day. And then either the second

00:09:18.120 or third day I shot another smaller buck with my bow and I'm like, well, that's easy. What's so

00:09:24.960 difficult about that? And then every hunt since has just been painstakingly rough, you know? So,

00:09:31.340 yeah. So, and what a great example of life, right? Whether it's hunting or jujitsu where you're

00:09:37.240 like the minute that you're, uh, got a little ego and pride, you know, life reminds you and,

00:09:43.160 you know, you need to stay humble. Yeah. So, all right, man. Well, we've wasted a lot of time here.

00:09:49.020 Yeah. Should we talk about politics now? Yeah. Let's do hunting, politics, religion.

00:09:54.980 We have a president elect or maybe, I don't know. I guess, I guess if this draws out and the,

00:10:00.320 the votes are too narrow, we may not know by the time this podcast is released.

00:10:06.220 What's your prediction? What's your, let's put it out on the line. We're recording this on Tuesday.

00:10:10.360 This is being released tomorrow. So this will be released on the fourth.

00:10:13.540 So let's just go ahead and hear your predictions. I have, I have Trump not winning the popular vote,

00:10:22.880 but winning in the electoral college by a narrow margin. I'm going to go with 279 to Biden's 259.

00:10:32.520 I am at very much in agreement on that. I think I would line up just perfectly with that.

00:10:37.480 Yeah. Yeah. I think, and I, for, well, this is all mute because by the time people hear this,

00:10:44.680 it's already happened, but I think it all comes down really. If, if Trump has Florida today,

00:10:50.060 then we have a race. He's going to win Florida. Yeah. If Florida is, I think he's going to win

00:10:55.960 Florida early. It's, it's over. Right. So no, I think, I think Trump will win Florida. Uh,

00:11:02.700 I, I've got a buddy, Sean Whalen. He's been on the podcast. I saw his post. He thinks,

00:11:07.600 he thinks Trump's going to win California. I'm like, come on, bro. Like,

00:11:11.920 well, he has like Trump winning like 300 and something. Yeah. I'm like, yeah. Every state

00:11:17.240 but New York, I think. Yeah. I mean, look, we can be optimistic, but let's not be delusional

00:11:22.800 about California. And to all our Californian brothers who are listening, like, whew,

00:11:27.420 interesting times over there. But here's the thing is like, I, I, I pulled that up and I showed

00:11:33.140 my wife and she's like, Oh, he's crazy. And I'm like, so was all the people that said Trump was

00:11:38.060 winning four years ago. People, everybody would have said you were crazy. California is not going

00:11:44.040 red, dude. It's not going red. Not enough of them have left California and gone into Utah and Nevada

00:11:50.380 and Idaho yet. That'll happen in the next, I would say five years, but not enough of them left yet

00:11:56.320 to, to turn California red. No way. Yeah. No way. I just don't see that happening.

00:12:02.340 So, all right. We'll know in the next 24 hours, next 12 hours. Crazy. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Questions

00:12:09.640 ready. I'm ready. Okay. Iron council. So, uh, we're filling our questions today from our exclusive

00:12:17.940 brotherhood, the iron council to learn more, go to order man.com slash iron council. And then if we get

00:12:23.080 time, we'll hop into the Facebook questions to join us on Facebook, go to facebook.com slash group

00:12:29.060 slash order, man. Daniel Wyckoff, what are your fears and what keeps you up at night?

00:12:36.180 So I did review some of these questions. I like this question. You know, I don't actually have a

00:12:40.320 whole lot of fears other than, okay. So the, the fears, like the ones that really stick out to me

00:12:46.460 are the things that revolve around my children. So obviously making sure that they live a life

00:12:55.700 that has plenty of opportunity, you know, and speaking of elections and the way this country

00:13:00.600 is going, like making sure that they have as much opportunity as possible, that there's as few

00:13:05.720 boundaries and barriers that the government would love to set in place to our prosperity and freedom

00:13:11.140 and just ensuring that they have the best possible opportunities. That to me is, is something that

00:13:17.820 keeps me up at night. It's something that concerns me. Uh, are, are my kids going to be okay? Are my

00:13:22.800 sons going to, going to, you know, do, do what is they want to do? Is my daughter going to be,

00:13:27.700 you know, safe? And is she going to be able to pursue the things that are meaningful and interesting

00:13:31.620 to her? And the other one that I had thought of just the other day, as I was traveling is just

00:13:36.360 at some point, God's going to call me home. Right. And I just, I pray every day that it's not until

00:13:43.160 my children are out of the house. Like that to me is the biggest fear that I have because I grew up

00:13:49.840 without a father. So I know what it's like not to have a permanent father figure in the household.

00:13:54.840 And I don't want that to be the situation for my kids. Like I, I look at my kids and I try to

00:13:59.760 objectively analyze like how much they admire and respect and appreciate and need me in their life.

00:14:05.200 Uh, so that's my biggest fear is dying before my kids are out of the house. Now I don't, I don't

00:14:12.020 want to die anytime soon, but I just pray again that it's done. And God calls me home after,

00:14:18.040 after my kids are out of the house. That is, that is a big fear for me. You know, outside of that,

00:14:21.540 it's just, it's not so much as a fear. It's just something I'm working hard to avoid is just being

00:14:26.220 average and being mediocre and complacent. Like I hate that stuff. Uh, and, and I don't want to be that

00:14:32.280 kind of person. So I really charge hard and making sure that I'm excelling and exceeding and doing the

00:14:38.660 best that I possibly can. And then the next thing is flying. I don't like flying. That's those are

00:14:42.820 my fears. I hate flying, man. I hate it. It's a scary thing to me. Real depth thought process and

00:14:49.600 flying. Yeah. And spiders, not spiders don't bother me. Fortunately, there isn't anything venomous

00:14:55.760 or poisonous that I, that I think in Maine anyway. So, you know, in Utah you had rattlesnakes and

00:15:01.140 scorpions and, but here in Maine, I don't think there's anything venomous or poisonous from what

00:15:06.340 no snakes, spiders aren't poisonous too cold up here for that, for that. So, yeah. Yeah. Hmm. I would

00:15:13.920 say mine are the same. I mean, it's really around my kids probably more than anything else. I like,

00:15:19.340 and what I think is an insightful that are up at nights, aren't things outside of our control.

00:15:25.420 You know what I mean? It's, it's kind of like, I mean, our kids are in our control,

00:15:30.440 but you don't, I mean, I'm not up at night worrying about something that I can't change.

00:15:35.880 Right. And then I think that, I mean, I kind of am though, because again, dying, you know,

00:15:41.840 like dying, I can't control that. Yeah. But I think how's this, but your concern is not so

00:15:49.320 much about dying. It's about your children and making sure they have what they need before you

00:15:53.620 go. Right. Totally. So I spent a lot of time with them. Yeah. I get that. That makes sense. Yeah.

00:15:58.320 And I think that's about how you show up in life. So, and yeah, mine's about the same. It's really

00:16:03.180 about my kids really more than anything else. Although it's interesting how I think it's like,

00:16:08.560 I'm doing EMT training. And as I'm learning about the cardiovascular system and respiration and all

00:16:20.220 this stuff, it's like, I don't know. It's crazy how it's, it's, I'm, I'm more present to my mortality.

00:16:28.620 As I look at this, you're like, wait a second. Like the lining of my blood vessels could be weak

00:16:35.220 right now. I may not even know about it, you know? Oh, for sure. Generate an aneurysm and die,

00:16:39.820 you know? Like it's, I don't know. Like just the thought process is like crossed my mind,

00:16:44.240 like more and more about these and, and, and some, and so many of these problems that kind of,

00:16:49.880 some of these, some issues that EMTs run into is like, these things are, aren't correctable,

00:16:55.960 you know? Right. It's right. You, you, you know, you have certain problems with your hearts or your

00:17:01.160 lungs or you damage your lungs from smoking. It's like, there is no like, oh, we'll start

00:17:06.160 eating healthier now on K. It's like, actually, no, like you're now at risk for the rest of your

00:17:11.980 life. Right. And the probability of you turning that around or, um, having a long life like you

00:17:19.080 once could have is gone period. Right. Like there is no take back. Right. So it's, I thought about that.

00:17:25.280 It's causing me to be a little bit more present to that. I think that's a great point. I mean,

00:17:29.920 we are so fragile. I thought about that. Even hunting this week is, you know, that's a little,

00:17:35.180 that's a small stick passing through your body and you're dead. Yeah. You know, I, I, I shot that

00:17:40.580 doe. You're dead. 60 yards. You're dead. You were, you're dead within 15 seconds. Uh, one of my

00:17:46.540 buddies who was there, Chris Ray, he shot a deer and it was super windy. He made a great shot, but

00:17:51.220 the wind got ahold of his arrow and turned it and it, and it shot this, this deer and it hit it in the

00:17:57.100 spine lights out. Done. I mean, we're pretty fragile. These, these meat meat sacks, right?

00:18:05.640 They're, they're pretty fragile and it doesn't take a whole lot to turn the lights out. So I, I,

00:18:10.960 I wholeheartedly agree with what you're saying. Little blood clot in your vessel. You're done.

00:18:15.500 That might be in for you. Yep. You're done. It's crazy. Exactly. Yep. Hmm. All right.

00:18:21.860 Philip, that was, that was a lovely note to start on. It's all good. Hey, you know what? It's,

00:18:29.780 it's the reality. Yeah. We have a tendency to kind of blow it off a little too much in regards to

00:18:35.720 realizing that, uh, it, it, it is the one thing we all have in common, right? We all will die.

00:18:41.580 Yep. Yep. All right. Philip, uh, Capadora, what is, uh, what is it the government can do for a

00:18:49.580 person that they, we can't do for themselves? Nothing. I mean, what, not really nothing. What

00:19:00.260 can the government do for a person that they can't do for themselves? Look, we live in the

00:19:04.400 most free and prosperous times the history of the world has ever known. There's nothing. I mean,

00:19:10.720 I guess, I guess I'm just trying to think about what it possibly could be, I guess, defend against

00:19:16.260 a foreign invader. Like you couldn't do that for yourself. But yeah, but could you rally groups to

00:19:24.140 get that together without a formalized government? Possibly. Maybe, maybe, yeah, maybe. Yeah. But, um,

00:19:32.000 yeah, I, I, I look, you guys have been around long enough listening to the podcast that, you know,

00:19:37.940 look, here's the reality. Governments are comprised of individuals. So what can one individual do for me

00:19:44.500 that I can't do for myself? Nothing. That's it. The answer is nothing. So I would rather do it for

00:19:51.180 myself and let other people do it for themselves and figure it out. And it's, it's going to be

00:19:55.140 painful. I think that's the problem is so many people want to avoid pain. You know, even as I

00:20:00.380 made that post the other day on, uh, on, uh, Instagram about what I believe about America,

00:20:05.240 you know, people were like, well, America's bad and evil. And look, I'm not saying that America is free

00:20:10.800 of blemishes or that we haven't had our painful circumstances or situations. Of course we have.

00:20:16.360 I'm just saying that we have more abundance and opportunity and prosperity to create these

00:20:21.540 meaningful lives for ourselves and the people that we care about in spite of the pain and the pain

00:20:25.680 doesn't go away. The mess ups don't go away. The mistakes don't go away. It just means they're

00:20:29.580 more manageable because there's meaning and purpose and fulfillment and opportunity to pursue the things

00:20:34.180 we are interested in. And you're not going to find that on the planet anywhere else, as much as you

00:20:39.260 will hear. So I I'm, I'm of the mindset of let's get the government out of the way as best as we can

00:20:47.100 and then allow ourselves to govern ourselves. And some guy came back and said, well, people can't

00:20:53.060 govern themselves. Just look at the COVID response. The COVID response is irrelevant. I don't care if

00:20:58.220 you're for lockdowns or if you're opening it up, everybody's dealing with COVID. Everybody's dealing

00:21:02.200 with the fallout and people can take care of themselves. They can make their own decisions.

00:21:07.360 So yeah, I'm, I'm never going to look to, to the government to solve my problems.

00:21:16.580 This is just not something I'm interested in doing. So nothing. The answer is nothing.

00:21:22.800 Well, and that's why freedom's at the root of what this country is about is it is the freedom to

00:21:29.120 succeed and the freedom, not to, to freedom, to go, you know what, I'm not going to make it a priority.

00:21:36.180 And, uh, I am going to screw my life up. Like, but that's so, but, but how much more powerful is that

00:21:43.200 than not having a choice at all? Right. Right. Those are, and, and, and it's funny. And we've joked

00:21:49.200 around this about, you know, in the past, like, you know, someone made a post, I think on,

00:21:53.100 on Facebook, it was about, you know, conservatives are crazy because they'd almost, you know,

00:21:59.580 they're willing to die for the sake of freedom. And I'm like, uh, yeah, like it is really,

00:22:06.400 really important, like super important. When you're going to die anyways. So do you want to

00:22:12.980 die a slave or do you want to die free? Like I want to die free and I want to pursue the things

00:22:18.380 that are meaningful and interesting to me. And I want to be left alone to be able to take care of

00:22:23.360 the things that are interesting to me and pursue those things. So yeah. Yeah. I, I, I don't like

00:22:28.620 big government at all. Yeah. And as much as, as much as people want to look at that scenario and go,

00:22:33.660 you know, look at suffering and pain and help people or whatever, I would suggest imagine a

00:22:39.640 country where everyone took accountability, where people took responsibility for the lives and didn't

00:22:47.480 expect government or someone else to fix it. Imagine how impactful and empowering that is.

00:22:54.160 Yeah. What I was going to say is big government, frankly, and this is going to piss a lot of people

00:22:59.140 off when I say this. So be it. Big government is unmanly because what you're doing is you're saying

00:23:06.480 that there's some entity or organization or group of people or collective that can solve your problems

00:23:11.240 better than you can solve your own. And people will respond to that and say, well, what are the,

00:23:15.080 what about those less fortunate? What about those who aren't able to take care of themselves? Well,

00:23:19.780 okay. Then we, as individual men have a responsibility to provide and take care of

00:23:24.540 those individuals. Like I have a responsibility. If my family is struggling to provide and protect

00:23:31.200 and care for the individuals under my care, I have a responsibility to ensure that my neighbors

00:23:35.880 are taken care of. If my neighbors across the street who, who are, are elderly are in a struggle,

00:23:41.940 I will be there to help. Whether it's mowing their lawn or running to one of them, to the,

00:23:48.220 to the doctor or the hospital, heaven forbid, like I will be there to help. Cause that's my job as a man

00:23:54.140 is to take care of myself and my own. And I consider my neighbors, my own. So I don't need somebody

00:24:00.400 else to do it for me. And, and relying upon somebody else to do it for you is unmanly.

00:24:06.960 It's a lack of personal responsibility. And Kip, you and I have been talking about personal

00:24:12.460 responsibility and accountability now for six years, almost six years. We've been talking about this

00:24:18.420 and it's only becoming more important as we continue down the track that we're going on.

00:24:23.480 Oh, but Ryan, oh, these people are less fortunate. Oh, but what about these people? What about these

00:24:27.020 people? They're fully capable. I have belief in the, the, the, the power of the human individual.

00:24:34.380 And for those who are not, because they're hamstringed by something like a medical illness or,

00:24:40.280 or, or, or a disease, or even, you know, even a mindset, maybe they, they were raised in a situation

00:24:45.640 that didn't. And look, I'm not going to pretend that I didn't come from, from a home for some of what

00:24:52.080 it lacked. My mom taught me everything that I needed to be a good human being. I realized not

00:24:58.420 everybody has that luxury. And so I had a leg up totally. I would be, I would be lying if, if I,

00:25:06.880 if I didn't say that I was fortunate in that my mother cared about my sister and I, and ensured that

00:25:11.960 we had everything that we need physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually to thrive

00:25:16.500 and succeed. I realized not everybody has that. So now it's my responsibility as a man who has,

00:25:21.800 has those things and an abundance of those things to then turn around and give where I can.

00:25:28.420 Isn't that what it means to be a man? We produce more than we consume. And so you think about this

00:25:34.600 for a second, as a boy, you're a consumer, right? You remember when you were a child and you have kids

00:25:41.280 of your own, they're consumers. We love them, but they are a consumer only. They consume energy,

00:25:49.360 time, attention, money, food. That's what boys and girls do. It isn't until we learn to produce more

00:25:59.480 than we consume that we become men. And so what this allows us to do when my needs are met, let's talk

00:26:05.600 about Maslow's hierarchy of needs, for example, you know, air, breath, food, shelter, water. Those are

00:26:12.080 important. When my basic and foundational needs are met and I no longer have to worry about those things

00:26:18.460 being taken care of, then the abundance I produce can now be turned into a business like we're doing

00:26:24.560 here, uh, or charity work or charitable contributions or some sort of ecclesiastical service. But if you

00:26:32.680 produce more than you consume, then you can take the resources that are in excess that you have

00:26:38.080 stored up, whether it's money or time or attention, and you can give abundantly to those individuals

00:26:43.720 who aren't so advantaged as maybe we, we are. Yeah. It's, it's just, we have a responsibility

00:26:53.580 and we, as men by design and by definition, produce more than we consume so that we can turn outwards

00:27:01.400 and help other people who don't have the same benefits as we do, who aren't, who don't have

00:27:07.440 the same opportunities that we do, who aren't blessed with good health or having parents that

00:27:13.400 love them or abundance of opportunity or education. But I don't need that mandated. All right. That's

00:27:20.860 the, that's the difference. You don't need to mandate that. I think generally speaking,

00:27:26.580 people are good and charitable and want to serve other people because we recognize that it's good

00:27:32.800 for the collective and it's good then for us individually, that doesn't need to be mandated.

00:27:38.500 Look at charitable contributions. It doesn't need to be mandated. It will take care of itself.

00:27:43.940 Well, and, and for people that might disagree with you and say, Oh, it should be mandated. Or let me

00:27:51.040 actually, I take that back for those people that see a need, what's stopping you. Right. Do it.

00:27:57.420 Do it right now. You don't need a government to implement a policy to take tax dollar money and,

00:28:04.080 and do it inefficiently. You see a need, you see an issue with whether it's homelessness or

00:28:10.320 opportunity for an education or reaching out to other men, do it. Like actually get off your couch,

00:28:16.500 stop running your mouth about what's wrong with the world and actually do something about it.

00:28:21.860 Exactly.

00:28:22.600 And guess what? You're going to be more effective on implementing something anyway.

00:28:27.420 That's, and that's the point is that, yeah, if it's mandated, I, it's going to be less efficient.

00:28:35.800 It's going to be less efficient than you doing it yourself or you getting a group of individuals to

00:28:41.540 do it yourself. Can the government mandate it? Sure. Through manipulation, coercion and force,

00:28:48.160 but I can assure you that anything the government can do you in a collection to your point earlier,

00:28:53.820 a group of people can do it more effectively, more efficiently because you're demanding or

00:28:59.620 utilizing the principle of the invisible hand that Adam Smith's talk talks about in the wealth of

00:29:04.920 nations, that there's this invisible hand that, that, that it, which is the incentive,

00:29:10.620 right? The incentives that we have to do these things that drives creativity, prosperity,

00:29:17.820 ingenuity, new trends, new ideas. I mean, look at Elon Musk

00:29:23.420 with his space, what is it? SpaceX, the SpaceX program. Yep. Look at what he's done in,

00:29:31.900 I don't know when he started that. I imagine it's been maybe a decade, maybe, maybe slightly longer.

00:29:35.680 I really don't know actually, but look at what he's done in that amount of time because it's

00:29:42.160 privately owned. Like he can be efficient. He can look at things differently. He can see things from

00:29:47.660 a vantage point that the bureaucrats can never see and will never see. And how much more do you

00:29:54.620 appreciate your dollar and your value and your time when it's yours, not somebody else's?

00:30:00.240 Yep. Well, the way I spend my time is extremely important to me. And I ought to be in charge of

00:30:07.160 how, how I allocate my time, energy, and resources. And because I'm, that's important to me,

00:30:13.260 then I will ensure that I make the best possible decisions with that time, energy, and attention

00:30:18.260 based on what I'm after. Somebody asked about success later in the list of questions. We'll get

00:30:23.320 into that. But success is autonomy. It's doing what you want to do, when you want to do it,

00:30:28.360 why you want to do it, and how you want to do it. That's the only objective answer to what is

00:30:32.760 success. Yeah. Anything else is less than being successful. Yeah. And in your example, by you

00:30:41.400 implementing that said program, you're going to attract the right people to do that job.

00:30:48.000 Because you have to.

00:30:49.500 Exactly. You have to have the right person in the job to actually do the job. So you're going to get

00:30:54.000 the right assets, the right individuals involved versus you wouldn't, if it was government mandated,

00:30:59.520 right? A perfect example of this is underground railroad. Those guys can do what governments

00:31:04.480 can't do. And that's a really tough job. So who would be willing to do that? The people that it

00:31:11.100 matters enough to them to actually step up and actually provide those types of services. So by

00:31:16.660 have the motivation, get the right people, right? They have the motivation, they have the skillset,

00:31:21.260 they have the training, and those are the people they hire. And if they hire the wrong people,

00:31:25.160 things go south. And then they correct it, hopefully. And if they don't correct it,

00:31:28.500 everything goes south and it poisons the well. Yeah. Yeah. Good times. All right. Evan Berwick,

00:31:38.060 during your separation and divorce, how did you stay focused on yourself and your happiness? So I'm

00:31:44.280 assuming during your separation and my divorce, how did we stay focused on yourself and your happiness?

00:31:51.260 I just felt myself getting, feeling better about who I was. That's it. I just felt better when I

00:31:59.780 lost weight and I got in shape and I got my finances in order. And I started hanging out with

00:32:03.580 friends and picking up new hobbies and reading and doing the activities that were good. The feedback

00:32:08.600 that I was receiving, not from other people, but just the circumstances I was experiencing were

00:32:13.400 better. And I just thought to myself, I want more of that. Yeah. And it wasn't at first,

00:32:19.760 it was to win her over, right? To win her back. And then slowly it became, I mean, it still wandered

00:32:25.720 into my life, but slowly it became, I like this feeling. I feel good. I feel confident. I feel

00:32:32.100 powerful. I feel engaged. I feel like I'm building up trust and credibility and authority with other

00:32:38.480 individuals. I like the way that I feel. And then she happened to respond to that. I say happen,

00:32:43.920 that's too passive, but inevitably she responded to that. Yeah. Right. Like that's just the way

00:32:50.160 that it works. It's the way it works. And that's why I tell guys, if you're going through a separation

00:32:55.360 or a divorce or some sort of contention or bitterness within your relationship, just fix

00:33:00.440 yourself, focus on yourself. And I had a, I had a gal email me several weeks ago and she, she started

00:33:06.560 the email with, I have a bone to pick with you. I'm like, Oh great. Here we go. Cause I've gotten a few

00:33:10.400 of these over the years. And she blamed me for the demise of the relationship. And what she said is

00:33:17.460 she said that her husband interpreted one of my podcasts as just completely shirk your

00:33:25.240 responsibilities and don't keep her in the loop and just go focus on yourself and forget all about

00:33:31.920 everything else that's going on. So she even said that he interpreted as this and she still didn't see

00:33:38.420 how that was his ownership. Yeah. And she even said, she listened to the podcast that, that was

00:33:44.660 in reference. Yeah. Look, that's not what I'm telling you to do. And I, she interpreted that

00:33:50.940 incorrectly. And so did he, if that's true. Yeah. And I don't know if it's true or not. Like that's

00:33:56.460 just one side of the story. You know, somebody could be bitter and say, well, this is why, you know,

00:34:01.140 for example, I've, I've kicked people out of our Facebook group and guys will say, well, you kicked me

00:34:04.760 out because I disagreed. No, not at all. I kicked you out because you're an asshole who happened to

00:34:09.060 disagree with me. It had less to do with your disagreement and more to do with the way you

00:34:12.300 responded. So let's, let's not like conflate the two, that being a dick equates to just, you

00:34:17.220 disagreed with me because you disagree with me at times Kip. And yet still here you are co-hosting

00:34:21.920 this podcast with me. So it has, has nothing to do with disagreement and everything to do with the

00:34:26.440 way that you handle yourself and carry yourself. So I can't really remember where I was going with

00:34:31.720 that. But look, the point is, is don't interpret taking care of yourself to shirking responsibility.

00:34:42.920 You still have a mortgage. You still have children. You still have a job. You potentially still have

00:34:48.200 your wife. There's still obligations and responsibilities in which you signed on the

00:34:52.580 dotted line and said, I will honor these commitments. Taking care of yourself doesn't mean you'd get to

00:34:59.420 dishonor what you signed up to do. It just means you need to make sure that you are doing this in

00:35:06.580 addition to handling your responsibilities. And by the way, if you take care of yourself and the

00:35:12.240 feedback that you receive is positive, and it will be by the way, it always will be, even if your

00:35:17.220 relationship doesn't work out. Cause sometimes it won't. That's the truth. Yeah. Sometimes you can go

00:35:23.340 to your, yeah. I mean, and sometimes you can go to work on yourself and guys will think, well, Ryan,

00:35:28.040 you had a success story. Your wife stayed with you because you went, look, it could have very easily

00:35:32.200 went the other way, but that doesn't mean my advice is inaccurate. In fact, it will become less

00:35:38.140 important. I'm not saying it won't sting. It will, but it will become less important, less relevant

00:35:42.740 because you're in a better spot physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

00:35:46.160 Yeah. So I don't want to lie to you and say that if you fix yourself, then she'll come back. I don't

00:35:50.960 know if she will. I just know what to give you a better chance. And I know if it doesn't work out,

00:35:55.280 then you're at least you put yourself on the right path for the next woman to come into your life.

00:35:58.660 And there will be other women. Yeah. But again, don't interpret my recommendation advice of taking

00:36:05.580 care of yourself is shirk everything else. No, continue to manage what you have to manage,

00:36:11.000 honor your responsibilities and commitment. And in the meantime, figure out a way to work on

00:36:15.240 yourself so that you can be more capable of honoring and upholding your commitments and

00:36:21.000 responsibilities. Yeah, totally. I have a perfect example of that. And whether my ex-wife intended

00:36:27.420 to do this or not, when, when we got separated and we're kind of through this limbo divorce stage,

00:36:34.220 I saw her constantly going out and, and having fun. And it was really interesting. And whether she was

00:36:44.680 doing this or not, this was my interpretation, but I started realizing that she wasn't focused on

00:36:50.760 herself. She was focused not on herself. She was focused on not dealing with like the fallout of

00:37:02.080 our marriage. She wasn't focused on improving another. She was focused on excitement and having

00:37:06.780 fun. And, and you know what I mean? And it was all about kind of like excitement and entertainment.

00:37:11.680 And luckily for me, and once again, this is my interpretation, but luckily for me,

00:37:17.180 I saw that from my perspective and I thought, wait a second, that's not what I need to do.

00:37:23.740 I don't need a hobby and distraction and fun and not worrying about focusing on myself. What I needed to

00:37:33.120 do is get centered. I needed to focus on how I was showing up in life. I needed to focus on the kind

00:37:41.000 of man I was. I need to focus on integrity and honor. And, and, and that's the focus on myself

00:37:49.200 that, that really became present for me and was agnostic to, it had nothing to do with excitement,

00:37:56.340 fun and entertainment. And you know what I mean? All these distractions. And that is what allowed me to

00:38:02.060 like have a kind of a transformation of the kind of man I was when I was married versus who I ultimately

00:38:09.000 became through that divorce process. So my focus on me was a, like a real internalization of how did

00:38:16.700 I show up in life and who was I being as a man? That is what allowed me to progress and move on.

00:38:25.320 So I don't know. I think that's a good example of when you say focus on yourself, it's not,

00:38:29.780 oh, you know, go to the gym a lot and that's it. Right. And be an asshole and be a bad dad and never

00:38:35.900 neglect your children. That's not what we're saying. Or, or, you know, go out there and,

00:38:41.580 and get drunk and get shit faced and do stupid things and make bad decisions because you're

00:38:46.120 focusing on yourself. I think you made a great distinction and you talked about being entertained

00:38:50.580 and you also use the term distraction. And, and I think that's the line. Are you going out there

00:38:57.900 and are you trying to entertain and distract, or I would even throw in the term sedation,

00:39:02.320 right? Are you trying to sedate yourself from the reality of your circumstances by getting drunk or

00:39:07.320 getting high or whatever it is you try to do, or are you addressing it head on? And that's the

00:39:12.660 difference. Are you going to the gym so you don't have to think about things or are you going to the

00:39:16.660 gym so you can make yourself more capable? Are you hanging out with friends so they can, so you can

00:39:21.580 have some fun and not think about life or are you surrounding yourself with men who are going to

00:39:25.800 uplift you and hold you accountable and challenge you in all the right ways, right? Are you,

00:39:32.340 are you hiring coaches and mentors? Are you reading good books to be entertained and,

00:39:37.300 and, and just blinded to what's going on? Or are you reading a book that's actually

00:39:41.100 enlightening you, which enlightenment is not always comfortable. You think about light.

00:39:45.980 Here's a perfect analogy. I woke up this morning at five o'clock and got ready to go into,

00:39:49.660 into training. And I got out of bed and I try to be respectful to my wife if she's still in bed.

00:39:55.020 So I don't want to turn all the lights on. So I walked into the dark, into the bathroom and I

00:39:58.660 flipped the light on. What do your eyes do? They, it hurts, man. Like if you've been in the dark and

00:40:04.080 you turn the light on, it hurts. It's painful. And you close your eyes. You're like, Oh, I don't want

00:40:08.240 to see this light. Right? That's what we do. It's a perfect analogy for what some of you men may be

00:40:13.620 experiencing. Like you, you continue to put the blindfold over your face because you don't want to deal

00:40:18.500 with a pain of enlightenment and enlightenment. What does that do? It illuminates it. It shows all

00:40:25.080 the nooks and crannies and, and, and, and brings light to the shadows and things that you've never

00:40:30.340 dealt with potentially. And now all of a sudden it's right in your face. And you're like, ah,

00:40:35.040 I closed my eyes. I don't want to see that. You have to see it. You have to see it because if you don't

00:40:42.040 see it, it's not like the threat goes away. It's not like if you don't see it, like a little child

00:40:47.580 thinks when it covers his eyes that, Oh, if I cover my eyes, then that threat can't see me. No,

00:40:53.060 it's still there. It's still present. It just means you're not acknowledging it, which makes you

00:40:57.340 weak. It weakens your position. Strengthening your position is okay. I'm going to take my hands over my

00:41:04.400 eyes. I'm going to open my eyes. I'm going to illuminate the room or the situation. And it's going to

00:41:08.680 be painful and it's going to be uncomfortable. And I'm going to see all little nooks and crannies. I

00:41:11.760 didn't see before. Yeah. But this is the path to creating a circumstance or a situation that I

00:41:18.000 can thrive and excel in in spite of the threat and the enemy and the challenges that come with life.

00:41:24.300 And to be clear, that threat could be your circumstance. It could be another person. It could

00:41:29.300 be you. It could be the man in the mirror, right? When I went into the bathroom, I look at the man

00:41:32.700 in the mirror and that threat could be like, there you go. The guy staring back. Yeah, for sure.

00:41:37.180 Josh Guerrero, Ryan and Kip, in today's society, it seems as though the weakness and mediocrity is

00:41:46.520 encouraged and even celebrated, whereas strength and striving for excellence is often ridiculed

00:41:52.140 and viewed as barbaric. What do you think led to this? And what can we as men do to reverse this

00:41:58.660 trend and cultivate strength and excellence in our societies? I think what led to this, not

00:42:06.640 specifically, but I think the mindset that leads to this is we view other people's success as a

00:42:13.680 threat to ourselves. And if, if Kip, you thrive and excel, you basically just wiped away the excuse

00:42:22.160 that I have to do that for myself. Right? Because if you can do it, then I should be able to do it.

00:42:29.420 So why am I not doing it? Oh, it's because you're not doing what's required. So I'll give you an

00:42:33.660 example. Uh, so I'm going to go back to hunting here. Uh, so on this last hunt, I told you my

00:42:39.760 brother-in-law killed his first deer with a bow. He's killed other deer, but his first year with a

00:42:44.600 bow. In fact, he killed the second, second deer with a knife, right? Yeah, exactly. The third one,

00:42:49.860 he did a rear naked choke on, he jumped on its back and rear naked choked it. So at first I was

00:42:56.940 like, Oh damn, like I want to, I want to do that. I'm like, wait a second. The fact that he killed

00:43:04.160 two deer isn't a threat to me. I mean, I guess I couldn't kill that particular deer, but there's

00:43:10.240 other deer out here and it isn't a threat to me. You can't. Yeah. Right. And, but that's how people

00:43:16.720 interpret it. Right. Because, Oh, if this guy can do it, then it's a, and it's a finite pie.

00:43:23.000 This is how people look at it. It's a finite pie. Yeah. If he gets, then I can't, then why?

00:43:28.640 Of course, naturally you're going to be upset when somebody else thrives. But instead I just took a

00:43:34.920 moment to reflect. I'm like, you know what? How exciting must that be for him? First archery hunt

00:43:40.400 comes out here, shoots a doe, then shoots a buck. Like how exciting. And why would I not honor that?

00:43:46.800 Why would I not be excited for him? Why would I not celebrate with him? Why would I not

00:43:51.160 tell him that I'm proud of what he accomplished? Because it isn't a threat to me.

00:43:56.460 What is that though? Like, is that, do you think that's ego? Like if we pull back that onion a little

00:44:02.980 bit, yeah. Is that ego is like, Oh wait, I'm not as, is it, I'm not as good as he is. That is what

00:44:09.900 bothers us. Of course. Yeah. Of course. We want to be the best at it. Yeah. Is that true?

00:44:16.620 Is he better than me? No, not in the grand scheme of things. Is he a better archer than me

00:44:22.800 or a bow hunter? Maybe on that particular day. Yeah. And even if he is, so what? Let's say he is,

00:44:30.060 let's say objectively he's a better. Does that make you any less of a person? Yeah. Right. Exactly.

00:44:34.260 So what? He's better than me. You know, there, there's plenty. Tom Brady's a better quarterback

00:44:38.840 than me. Does that mean that I have to think less of myself because Tom Brady excels? No,

00:44:43.880 I think that's great. It's not a threat to me. You, you are better at growing a mustache alone

00:44:50.560 than I am. Does, is that a threat to me? That's what I, but what I'm saying is, is at the end of

00:44:59.100 the day, yes, people get upset because they perceive other people's successes as their own failures.

00:45:07.780 They interpret as, well, I'm a failure because again, to go back to what we were saying earlier,

00:45:11.380 it illuminates it. It draws attention to it. Well, Austin shot a buck. How come you didn't,

00:45:16.660 right? You just illuminated what you failed to accomplish. So we do have to be very,

00:45:22.040 very careful of comparing ourself to other people and what they're accomplishing and what they're

00:45:26.780 doing because it doesn't a pose any serious or real risk to us. And B, it's just not helpful

00:45:33.840 to get yourself in that state of mind where you're thinking you're a failure or you're a loser.

00:45:40.000 How's that going to help you thrive next time? It's only going to place more undue pressure on

00:45:44.180 yourself. And you might choke again because you're feeling this added pressure that doesn't really

00:45:48.700 exist that you created yourself. So I found that the best thing that you can do. And I think that's

00:45:55.680 what this gentleman was asking. Who was it by the way? What's the guy's name? Uh, it was Josh. Oh,

00:46:02.140 Josh. I think the best thing that you can do, Josh is just go to work on yourself. I mean,

00:46:10.560 I hate to beat a dead horse, but if, if I get back from a hunt, cause we're on that analogy

00:46:15.700 and I feel like I didn't perform adequately, do I rag on everybody who did or do I just go out and

00:46:22.560 take a few more shots? That that's my, that's what I'm doing. It's like, oh, okay. Well, I got

00:46:27.720 to go back to, I missed that shot on that belt. Why did I miss it? Oh, I missed it because you got

00:46:31.760 excited or because you pulled or because whatever, it could have been a thousand different things.

00:46:35.420 So let's go through the list and address those things and work towards it so that when I go do it

00:46:39.500 next time, I'm that much better because focusing on what somebody else did and how their performance

00:46:45.340 was isn't going to make me better. It isn't going to make me better to focus on the fact that my

00:46:50.860 brother-in-law was able to get it done on two deer and I was only able to shoot one. That doesn't make

00:46:55.320 me better. Yeah. It don't, it don't. In fact, if anything, it just, it makes me worse because I'm

00:47:01.200 not willing to acknowledge that I need some practice, which is obvious as a parent, but it is

00:47:07.220 to your point, a very ego driven mentality of like, well, you know, he just got lucky. Oh, well,

00:47:13.600 man, if I had this situation, well, then I would have, you know, like, oh, that deer was in this

00:47:18.500 and he was in perfect syndrome. So if I was there, I would have done it too. Well, who's to say that

00:47:23.380 actually would be the case. You still got to perform under pressure. You still get, and he

00:47:28.360 got it done and that's good. I should be excited about that. And here's the thing about celebrating

00:47:32.440 other people's success. I'm going to come at it from two different angles. There's two sides of the

00:47:37.860 spectrum here. One celebrating people's success. And the other side of the spectrum is shitting on other

00:47:42.760 people's success. So let's talk about crapping on other people's success first. If you're downplaying

00:47:48.340 other people's success and you're writing it off as luck or just some happenstance and you're

00:47:52.260 diminishing what it took to get there, then basically you're hamstringing yourself because

00:47:56.700 you're, you're saying to yourself simultaneously while you're telling somebody that they're lucky.

00:48:01.560 Like I have guys who will say, oh, right. Oh, you must be lucky to have the job that you have

00:48:06.300 lucky. What the hell are you talking about?

00:48:08.660 That. Yeah. You know, I, I just, I've been rejected and dismissed, dismissed and mocked and

00:48:15.080 ridiculed. I'm not going to say more than other people. I'm sure there's people who've been more so

00:48:20.840 than me, but enough that it's an obstacle that I've had to overcome that I actually have to share my

00:48:27.900 thoughts with you and basically say, judge me. You know, we put out what six, maybe 700 podcasts at this

00:48:35.640 point. And every single one of them is an invitation for hundreds of thousands of people

00:48:39.780 to judge my thoughts and my intellect and the way I communicate and the way that I look.

00:48:45.880 That's not luck. That's a hell of a lot of work and scary and fear.

00:48:52.140 Yeah. So what, when you say, well, he just got lucky or, oh yeah, if that situation,

00:48:57.900 then I would have too. Basically what you're telling God or the universe or whatever, however you choose

00:49:03.560 to look at it is like, well, I guess I'll just wait here, hands crossed, hanging out. I guess when

00:49:09.580 my ship, you know, comes in, then I'll be lucky too. Yeah. And now you just made yourself weak

00:49:15.280 because you're waiting and you're playing this passive game of hoping something happens.

00:49:20.360 But if on the other hand, I acknowledge what it takes to be successful, whether it's a successful

00:49:25.740 podcaster or archer or business owner or jujitsu practitioner or whatever. And I acknowledge

00:49:34.980 as objectively as possible, the amount of work it must've taken to get to that point.

00:49:40.500 Then what I'm doing is I'm acknowledging the path that I too need to walk,

00:49:45.440 which is painful and long and frustrating and filled with highs and lows. And I'm objectively

00:49:55.380 accepting and embracing the path that I need to walk in order to have the success that other people

00:50:01.140 need to walk. And by the way, if somebody happens to be fortunate or get lucky along that path,

00:50:07.160 does that mean that I no longer need to walk the path myself? No, of course not. Some people get

00:50:13.140 lucky. And that's all, that's all it is, but I'm not going to diminish it because when those

00:50:19.120 opportunities present themselves, and by the way, they will, we're all going to be presented with

00:50:23.420 fortunate opportunities. People say, Oh, Ryan, you're so lucky with the podcast. No, I did a lot

00:50:27.880 of work. And also let me just be willing to admit this, that I started talking about this at a very

00:50:34.220 fortunate time. The timing was very fortunate. It wasn't like I planned it out. I was like, I want to

00:50:41.460 talk about this. And the timing was very fortunate. And I happened to have other circumstances in my

00:50:47.880 life that were beyond my control that led to this point. But I want to be prepared when that time

00:50:53.720 arrives and that time happens. So I choose not to dismiss people's success as luck. It's, it's,

00:51:01.660 it's destructive. It keeps you from accomplishing what you want to accomplish.

00:51:07.340 So when somebody achieves something, here's my thought process, congratulations first,

00:51:15.020 because I think congratulations are in order. If somebody achieves something, I think you ought

00:51:19.100 to congratulate that person. Congratulations. And then the next step is how in the hell did this guy

00:51:26.420 do this? And then you study it and you break it down and you analyze it and you process it and you

00:51:33.620 apply it so that you can then go out and replicate and duplicate the same thing that this guy did that

00:51:38.920 you're, uh, maybe otherwise jealous or envious of. Totally. I like, I really like this. I want to

00:51:48.060 suggest another related angle, you know, cause his question was like, you know, it seems that weakness

00:51:54.920 and mediocrity is encouraged and celebrated. And, and I think for some people, the root of that

00:52:01.240 celebration is that we think our circumstances define us, that who we are as an individual,

00:52:09.560 that we're at the mercy of our circumstances. And, and I think it's victimhood. So,

00:52:16.220 oh, oh, poor Ryan, you know, he was raised in a bad circumstance and well, I'll give him all types

00:52:24.580 of excuses of why he can't achieve in life. And you know what I mean? And, and then we almost like

00:52:30.480 pander to someone that has a tough circumstance and then they may get their story and their sob story

00:52:36.840 and their excuse for why they have done nothing with their lives and why they can't succeed like other

00:52:42.460 individuals. And now everyone else is lucky because they started off in a better position than them,

00:52:49.240 or it was luck or it was whatever. And we celebrate this, this circumstance of unfortunate

00:52:55.900 situation and circumstance that, that you may have gotten as a child. And, and, and this is how it

00:53:03.560 relates to what you're saying is how do we get past that? You're inspiring despite your circumstance

00:53:11.100 that you end up becoming the David Goggins that now every other guy that was raised by an abusive

00:53:17.700 father goes, oh shit, what's my excuse? You have no excuse. If you're around a David Goggins that you

00:53:28.240 see his upbringing. Now what's your excuse for not being amazing in life? His circumstance, obviously,

00:53:35.340 well, better yet, his circumstance find him, made him a better man, right? He wasn't at the mercy of

00:53:45.180 it. It's what made him great. And, and last, last AMA, one guy mentioned about having a stroke

00:53:52.480 like a few years ago. And I was kind of like, the thought crossed my mind is like, and I know it. And,

00:53:58.360 and I will all think of even my son, right? My son has Usher syndrome. He's, he's going blind and he

00:54:04.020 has a very hearing loss. Now I could, he could feel sorry for himself, right? Oh man, I have a

00:54:11.560 horrible circumstance and most people would buy into it a little bit. Yeah, you're right. You know

00:54:16.580 what? That is horrible. How do you get people to get moved beyond that and not celebrate bad

00:54:23.520 circumstances and celebrate excellence and striving for, for becoming better? You rise above your

00:54:30.120 circumstance. And now what a great opportunity he has to be amazing and inspire people because he's

00:54:38.920 going to do something with his life that other people would give up. Yes. The guy with the stroke,

00:54:44.620 he can use that in his excuse for the rest of his life and no one will ever like question it.

00:54:49.640 But when he rises up and becomes a better man because of it, that's how you get people to start

00:54:55.360 celebrating excellence. It's, it's well said, you know, another example I think of is, well,

00:55:01.400 let me say this. I think in society collectively in general, because things are so easy, we become

00:55:05.800 overly empathetic. Empathy is good. Understanding, compassion, it's all good. But when we get,

00:55:11.340 take it too far, we actually hinder the people that we pretend to care about. So this guy in the

00:55:16.100 Facebook group the other day, post something about he's in a wheelchair. Did you see this one by chance?

00:55:20.600 Uh, I didn't. Okay. So the guy's in a wheelchair and he, and he was, he was basically upset that

00:55:26.260 women would look at, at him or wouldn't talk with him or, you know, they, they were, they were being

00:55:32.060 superficial because they saw him in a wheelchair and, and they didn't want to pander to him or

00:55:36.560 whatever. Yeah. And I was like, look, I don't give a shit if you're in a wheelchair. I don't care.

00:55:41.980 Okay. I don't care about your excuse. And look, if you, if you're in a wheelchair and you're

00:55:46.260 listening to this or, or you have some sort of quote unquote physical disability, I don't give

00:55:51.140 a shit because it is what it is. And I know people with quote unquote disabilities. I had a blind guy

00:55:59.040 on the podcast, a hundred percent blind climb the seven tallest peaks of each continent, a kayak down

00:56:05.160 the Colorado river solo by himself. He can't see a thing. I don't care what your excuse is.

00:56:16.260 I, it, it doesn't matter. It's life. Your son, nobody cares about it. And I know that sounds like

00:56:23.520 harsh, but if you can teach that to him, like nobody's going to feel bad for you.

00:56:31.380 This is your hand and it's unfortunate. It is unfortunate, but this is your hand. So how do

00:56:38.780 we use this hand and play it the best that we possibly can? So when this guy is in here, I'm thinking

00:56:44.760 to myself, man, stop complaining about you being in a wheelchair. Imagine if you exerted half the

00:56:49.860 energy about you thinking women are superficial. And by the way, just because a woman chooses not

00:56:54.420 to be with you, it doesn't mean she's superficial. Like that's going to be a different life for her.

00:56:59.920 Yeah. Right. She gets to make that choice. She has a vote in the matter. Okay. So if you spent half

00:57:06.140 as much time worrying about what the way people perceive you as you do overcoming this perceived

00:57:13.120 disability that you have, can you imagine what your life would look like? Like how many mountains

00:57:17.740 would you have climbed by now? How many rivers would you have kayaked by now? Yeah. Totally.

00:57:24.020 Like we all have shit. We all have baggage. Some worse than others. I know people have it worse

00:57:27.760 than me and the world doesn't care. So embrace that and rise up in spite of it. Yeah. And what's

00:57:37.220 interesting to this, Ryan, is if you had two guys that had equal success in life and one had the right

00:57:44.640 father, had the trust fund, went to the Ivy league college and did all those things. And then the other

00:57:51.280 guy was poor farm boy, uneducated, had no dad. Which one's more inspiring? The one with the crappy

00:58:00.900 circumstance. Who wants to listen to the guy that had everything handed to him and life was easy

00:58:06.580 and he overcame him a better person. Like that's not inspiring. Right. Of course not. So there's,

00:58:12.760 there's opportunity that presents itself to the guy with the poor circumstance. He actually has

00:58:18.480 opportunity to be inspiring to people where the other guy doesn't. I agree. I, and look, I mean,

00:58:25.100 I know it is interesting. It's an interesting perspective, but I think we ought to be careful

00:58:28.820 of saying that. And I see your point. I just think we need to be careful of saying, well, I can be

00:58:35.440 inspiring. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Because I, that, that might come across as like seeking some

00:58:41.300 sort of external validation. No, you can accomplish a hell of a lot in spite of your circumstances.

00:58:47.880 Yeah. And how good will you feel about yourself? Yeah. Back to focusing on you earlier. Exactly.

00:58:55.000 Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Let that be the outcome, not the focus. Yeah. Right. Exactly. Yep. All right.

00:59:01.800 All right. We beat that one up. Yeah. I don't think we beat it up. I think people who are listening

00:59:07.120 and I don't care what your circumstance, I don't care if you came from a poor background. I don't care

00:59:11.640 if you came from another country. I think a Bedros Koulian, who's a friend of mine, uh, you know,

00:59:15.900 he came to this country and his mom and dad literally had to siphon steel. In other words,

00:59:21.820 gas out of people's cars to wash his hair out because he had lice when he was a kid. Like that's

00:59:27.820 how poor and destitute they were. They were stealing gas to wash their children in. Yeah. I don't care

00:59:35.340 about your circumstances because Bedros is crushing life in spite of all that. Eric Weinermeyer,

00:59:43.840 the gentleman I was referring to earlier has climbed the seven highest peaks on each of the continents

00:59:48.440 kayaked down the Colorado river and he's blind.

00:59:51.980 I don't care. And nobody else cares about what hand you think you were dealt.

01:00:00.360 How do you interpret the hand and how do you play it is actually what matters.

01:00:04.840 Yeah.

01:00:06.860 I feel like what else we should end with that, but what's your one question? Right.

01:00:10.480 Bart, uh, free Bert, Ryan, now that you have your blue bell, do you see your game developing faster

01:00:16.640 or more naturally any specific areas and what is your go-to techniques and submissions and what do

01:00:23.660 you have the most trouble with? I'm worse as a blue belt than I was as a white belt

01:00:29.760 because the expectation wasn't there when I was a white belt or the expectation you had on blue

01:00:37.580 was inaccurate. And now that you're there, you're like, Oh, okay. I swear. I don't know if this is

01:00:42.900 true for you, Kip, but when I, the, the night, the evening that I received my blue belt,

01:00:46.900 honestly, everybody got like 35% better. Like as soon as I put my belt on either, they got better

01:00:56.480 or I got worse or a combination of both, but something very surprising happened in that I got

01:01:04.360 my ass kicked in a whole different way. As soon as I put my blue belt on. Yeah. And it's true. I think

01:01:11.580 it, I think it happens all the time. Every belt. I think everybody deals with that. Yeah. And

01:01:15.740 you're, and you're a different target for certain guys, right? Oh, of course. White belts want to

01:01:19.640 take out the blue belt. Yeah. White belts like, Hey, am I, uh, am I ready for my blue belt? Let's

01:01:24.240 see. Let me roll with Ryan. You know? Yeah, it's good. It's all good. It makes you better.

01:01:30.140 Uh, so, okay. So go to go to technique submissions. Uh, I actually really, really enjoy the pressure

01:01:38.260 game. Like Kip, I think that's where you and I differ. Like you're, you're flexible. You're nimble.

01:01:43.560 You use your long limbs really, really well. I don't like that game. And I struggle with guys

01:01:48.400 that play that game because I want to be close and I want to be tight and I want to like just

01:01:53.420 pressure. And, and even when I roll with guys who play the pressure game, I like that better

01:01:58.760 because like they're putting all their weight on me and I like that game. And then somebody comes in

01:02:03.100 like Ty Nichols is like that. Keegan Roberts, Pete's son is a lot like that. He's very nimble.

01:02:08.100 He's very flexible. Uh, I actually really, really struggle with those guys because I just don't

01:02:14.640 have that dexterity and that speed. I can develop that. I just like to play like the in your face,

01:02:21.040 not dirty, but just like rough time. Yeah. I like that. A lot of pressure. Yeah. I like that game a lot.

01:02:27.620 So, um, if I can get into your side, I feel like I can put a lot of pressure on a person. Um,

01:02:35.260 and that sets up some things cause I can, because I can do that. Uh, but if they start stretching me

01:02:40.520 out and spreading me out, like I think about the guy I roll with Ryan Daggett, who's probably six,

01:02:45.080 three, six, four, super long limbs. Uh, and he just, he just stretches me out. He likes to play the

01:02:51.820 spider guard and the, uh, was it lasso guard. He likes to play those games and he's super good at

01:02:58.520 it. He gets me in triangles and he sweeps me all the time. Cause he just gets me spread out. And I'm

01:03:02.500 like, I just want to be close. I want to be compact. So my go-to game is the, is, is the tight

01:03:09.240 pressure game. And I struggle with space and flexibility and dexterity. It's something I

01:03:16.460 definitely need to work on. Is there a typical couple of submissions that you're kind of mostly

01:03:20.740 looking for? That's, you know what I mean? How you kind of go in seasons where, like where a

01:03:26.160 submission might be on your mind more than other typical submissions. And that's kind of your go-to

01:03:30.980 temporarily for a period of time. Yeah. I mean like my favorite submission is a, uh,

01:03:37.160 like a triangle choke from, from side control, you know, where they lift their arm up and you,

01:03:41.640 and you can grab their neck and there and grab the, and lock in their other shoulder.

01:03:45.780 You know what I'm talking about? Yeah. Yeah. And step over, uh, like a step over triangle from

01:03:51.460 side control or you could, I could, I actually stay on the side and I just flatten out like an

01:03:56.220 arm triangle. Oh, arm triangle. Got it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They'll expose the one arm and then

01:04:00.880 you'll go deep and yeah. Got it. Sink my head down. So I like that arm triangle a lot. Nice. Cause

01:04:05.780 people really step into that one. Um, I, I like chokes like any, any sort of like gee chokes,

01:04:13.040 lapel chokes. I really am focusing on those. And I'm actually focusing a lot lately on using the

01:04:18.680 lapel as a tool for submission and control. So how do I control this individual from,

01:04:25.460 you know, like shrimping away using their lapel and how do I keep them? Cause again,

01:04:29.540 I like the pressure game. So I want to keep them down. Right. So if I can grab one of their lapels

01:04:34.760 and swing it around their shoulder or back behind their neck, I've got more control of them. Them

01:04:38.820 being able to shrimp away is going to be harder for them to do. So if I can, I like the, that's

01:04:43.560 why I do gee, no gee would be more difficult. I don't train a whole lot of no gee very rarely.

01:04:48.680 In fact, that would be more difficult because I couldn't pin that individual to me the way I can

01:04:52.980 with a gee. Yeah. Yeah. Got it. Hmm. Like try, like leg triangles. I, I suck at them. I have like,

01:05:01.840 I have super short legs. So it's really hard for me to, not that I can't do it. It's just hard

01:05:07.240 for me to get that. The set up is harder. Deep enough to, to actually sink it in and lock it

01:05:13.840 in. So one thing's for sure though, once it's sinked in, you'd be, you'd be done. Yeah. Because

01:05:19.620 it's locked in and it's tight. Yeah. Yeah. What about you though? What, what game do you like?

01:05:26.320 Right now it's just, uh, for me, just, um, Kimora, everything's just Kimora. So I, I,

01:05:34.520 I really, uh, that not so position wise, like I, I've been trying to work like a high mount

01:05:40.320 a lot. I really like a, a high mount where the guys, his arms are extended there. You

01:05:45.560 know what I mean? They have no super uncomfortable. Yeah. It's just legs can't get into the game.

01:05:50.980 It's just miserable. I like that. I like that position, but, um, but I, I just really love

01:05:56.980 a, a Kimora, Kimora and Americana. It's just always on my head from, from side control

01:06:02.520 from wherever, kind of from wherever, right? Like last night we're training. Um, I'll even,

01:06:10.220 it sounds kind of crazy, but from even from bottom, I will grab an Americana when someone's,

01:06:17.120 when I'm in someone's side control, just to bait them to attack my arm. And if they don't,

01:06:23.160 I can actually use it to sweep them and get them in a Americana from top. So, and so I'll

01:06:30.020 even go for, for a Kimora from bottom, from a really crappy position and they have a choice.

01:06:36.720 They can counter it. Kimora me, which forces their hips. That's a neutral position essentially.

01:06:42.400 Exactly. But, but they have to adjust their hips, which removes pressure off of me,

01:06:46.820 which then allows me to escape. And if they don't, then I get my legs involved. And now

01:06:53.040 I have the Kimora, right? So that's just that Kimora trap is constantly just on my head. It's

01:06:58.000 just, I can't stop thinking about it. So that's, see, that's interesting. Cause what I'm hearing

01:07:02.740 you say is, and I've known this about you cause we've, we've had the opportunity to train a little

01:07:06.780 bit together is you're thinking so far ahead. You're like, I'm not even doing it to get it now,

01:07:12.880 if I can get it great, but if I don't, it's actually just there to set something else up.

01:07:16.400 And so that's a really interesting. Yeah. I've, I've focused in enough on the Kimora that,

01:07:21.360 that I'm going deep enough with it that I'm now having to address all the typical counters.

01:07:28.480 Right. So, and I'm doing enough to my teammates that they're now going like,

01:07:32.560 Oh hell no, you're not going to get that. Like I fell for that already. Now they're countering that.

01:07:38.040 And I'm like, okay, how do I deal with this now? Right. And instead of giving up. Yeah. And so

01:07:44.640 instead of giving up and going, Oh, I'm now going to move to this. It's now like, Oh, actually if

01:07:49.540 they defend this way, I can approach it from a different angle now and still get it. Right.

01:07:54.580 And so it's, it's opening up and I'm going deeper with my options. Yeah. You know, that evolution is

01:08:00.800 funny. So I've been training with Brody Cousineau. That's like my main training partner. Cause we go two

01:08:05.340 to three times in the morning. And then I train with Pete and the rest of the guys in the evenings.

01:08:09.260 Um, but like two weeks ago, two, three weeks ago we trained and he got like super good overnight.

01:08:16.920 And I'm like, what the hell is going on? Like he submitted me three or four times one morning.

01:08:21.420 Yeah. Which like, isn't totally common. So I'm like, what in the world is going on? And I couldn't

01:08:25.400 figure it out. It's just pre-workout discipline. Go. That's all it is. That the end that was our ad

01:08:32.000 spot for the day. So I'm like racking my brain. I'm like, what, what is going on? Cause you do

01:08:38.220 that. Right. You're like thinking, you're like, why is that like, I'm replaying it. That's not

01:08:41.580 normal. Yeah. Yeah. And over the next several training sessions, you know, kind of like went

01:08:47.400 back to the way that it was in the past. And I'm like, I wonder what happened there. Well,

01:08:52.180 the other day we were talking and he, he shared something with me that told me what happened.

01:08:58.280 And he said, well, so I've normally been playing defense and, and he thought to himself that

01:09:04.920 that week that he really wanted to play offense. Well, I wasn't used to him playing offense.

01:09:10.920 Yeah. And, and he said, you know, I played offense for that week. And then you started to evolve

01:09:17.120 to the offense, which made it harder to submit you because you learned. And that's what it was.

01:09:24.400 He was playing a different game that I wasn't used to. So I had to evolve my game in order to

01:09:29.840 meet his game that I wasn't aware that he was playing. And so it's, it's that evolution. So

01:09:36.640 today we were training and he's like, man, I just, I feel like I'm getting worse. And I said,

01:09:42.780 you're not getting worse. You're getting better, but both of us are getting better. And that's making

01:09:48.940 it feel like you're getting worse. It's not that it's because we're both getting better. And you

01:09:53.580 just haven't evolved to this thing yet, but you will. And then I'll have to evolve to that. And

01:09:57.420 then I'll, and then you'll have to evolve to me and I'll have to evolve to you. And it's just this

01:10:00.180 constant accordion effect, you know? So you'll get caught in all these things and you're like,

01:10:03.940 what, what, how is this happening? It's because you've never seen it before. You don't,

01:10:08.320 you haven't learned that game yet. It's interesting, man. It's like, obviously it's physically

01:10:13.220 stimulating, but it's mentally stimulating as well.

01:10:15.860 Yeah. When it's your shirt, right? It's, it's iron sharpens iron. Like I totally, we have a guy,

01:10:21.780 he has a fight in two weeks. And so I saw that on Instagram, we're preparing for his fight and

01:10:27.040 guaranteed, like if he loses that fight due to submission, all of us should feel like it's our

01:10:36.420 fault. Yeah. You're his team. Yeah. Like he, we obviously, I wasn't good enough to show him

01:10:45.000 a level of difficulty that made it hard enough to go against that guy, what he was going to face.

01:10:49.840 Yeah. If we made it easy on him in practice, we didn't prepare him. Right. And it was our lack of

01:10:55.700 ability that allowed him to get submitted. Right. Right. And it's, and that's why teammates are so

01:11:01.760 critical teammates, but just other men in your life. Like forget about jujitsu for a minute.

01:11:07.500 You know, I know a lot of you guys are looking for men in your corner. That's exactly why,

01:11:11.700 like you're not going to be able to evolve as quickly on your own. You can't, how could you,

01:11:15.720 how could you possibly evolve on your own? You have to have other people pushing on you in a good

01:11:20.320 and positive way. The other thing I was going to say that I've been working on Kip too, is I usually

01:11:24.960 in my guard, I usually play to the left side of my guard. So like, I'll go to my left hip, for example,

01:11:30.480 and I'll play to that side. Which is the typical side that most guys pass on.

01:11:36.640 Right. Cause they're right-handed. Yeah. So I guess maybe, I don't know, but whatever.

01:11:41.700 So lately I've really been focusing on don't play to that, but it's super hard because when I play to

01:11:49.560 my right side, I'm way worse on my right. Of course, obviously. Yeah. And so ego comes in,

01:11:55.820 it's like, just go back, just go back to like, no, no, no, no, no. I want to win right now.

01:12:00.400 Yeah. Right. And that's not the goal. See, that's the problem we have is we think, okay,

01:12:04.680 I want to win right now. And that sounds like it's the goal, but it's not. And jujitsu,

01:12:09.220 the goal is not necessarily, unless you're in a tournament to submit your part, your training

01:12:14.160 partner. That's not the goal of training. The goal of the tournament is that yes, but the goal of

01:12:20.820 training is not to submit your training partner. And I'm learning that because I thought that was the

01:12:24.940 goal. It's not, it's to make yourself better, which means that you got to stop playing to the left

01:12:30.580 and start playing your guard to the right. Because yes, you may not submit him, but it doesn't matter

01:12:35.360 because that's not the goal. The goal is to get better. And that is making you better. Or if I

01:12:40.100 always go after the same choke, it's like, I know I can get this. So why would I do that?

01:12:46.020 Because it's easy. Yeah. And it feels good when you win and you tap somebody. It's like, okay,

01:12:50.880 don't do that anymore. Like that's cheating at this point. Cause you know, you can get it. So

01:12:54.520 just go onto something else and get better. So we got to, and I'm trying to liken this to life in

01:13:00.300 general is stop cheating to your strengths. I mean, yes, when it counts, yes, use your strengths

01:13:06.380 when it counts. But when you're training shore up weaknesses, shore up other areas, make yourself

01:13:12.480 more capable so that when real life hits, you'll be able to deal with it with as like a broad array

01:13:20.740 of tools in your, your arsenal that you can use. Yeah. And, and the more you avoid your weaknesses,

01:13:26.440 the longer they'll be continue to be a weakness. And everybody will exploit them.

01:13:32.600 Yeah. Like you will be, I mean, this is, I mean, you and I have talked about this, but this is the

01:13:38.020 idea of vulnerability. Like why, why would we be vulnerable? The only reason to be vulnerable as a

01:13:45.260 man is so that you can acknowledge it and actually shore up your vulnerability. Yeah. That's the only

01:13:53.200 reason like men don't cry to cry. Men don't express emotion or get ups. That's not what we do. Yes.

01:14:00.440 We will be emotional at times. And there's times where it's certainly appropriate, but I don't like

01:14:05.060 the vulnerability movement because people do it just for the sake of being vulnerable and they score

01:14:10.440 virtue points. Yeah. It's without purpose. Right. So I'm all for being vulnerable if you're only doing

01:14:19.140 it to say, yeah, I suck at this. So I want to acknowledge it so that I don't suck at this for

01:14:24.440 the rest of my life. That's the only reason a man would be vulnerable. Otherwise, why would you tell

01:14:30.220 your enemy your position? Oh, you know what? Like 90% of our, our, our, our place is secure, but you

01:14:37.060 know, Hey, uh, to make this a more fair fight, let me tell you the 10% that's not shored up. And I

01:14:41.980 would, I would have you and suggest that you attack this place over here. Like, why would you ever do

01:14:45.700 that? Of course you wouldn't do that. What you would do is you would exert some effort towards

01:14:49.320 shoring up that 10%, but you have to acknowledge it, but only to cement it, to, to shore it up.

01:14:54.980 Yeah. And instead we're like, Oh no, no, they'll celebrate the fact that I'm a victim. And then

01:14:59.700 they'll feel guilty that they had opportunities. And then they'll leave us alone because we're virtuous.

01:15:03.720 Oh, this isn't a fair fight. I don't want to exploit that. Cause it's not a fair fight.

01:15:09.300 Yeah. That's funny. I, uh, on that note, I've been, uh, I, I have been watching Cobra Kai by the

01:15:16.580 way, Kip. It's great. So good. So good. Oh, I just want to be bad-ass. Yeah. I know. And that's

01:15:26.020 the best part about it is he's so politically incorrect. Like, and, and this is the insight.

01:15:32.000 Here's, here's some Cobra Kai of wisdom for everybody. And this is what makes this show great

01:15:36.320 is he's a complete jerk. He says things that are, you know, he attacks things that people can't

01:15:43.640 change. Like he's attacking a kid with a cuff lip, cuff lip. So true, man. But here's, what's so cool

01:15:50.340 about it is he tells them what they need to hear to become better and move beyond it. Right. And,

01:15:57.820 and, and that's where there's some truth in this show. You're like, there's some truth to that

01:16:03.840 approach, you know? It's all true. Like, yeah, it's, it's totally uncomfortable and it makes you

01:16:08.520 cringe. You're like, Ooh, and then you're like, but that's actually a pretty good point. Yeah. Yeah.

01:16:14.820 And he's learned it too, but not, he's learning that everything's not about just being bad-ass,

01:16:19.160 you know, but that's the part I don't agree with. Cobra Kai wisdom. That's the title of this

01:16:26.300 podcast, guys. Cobra Kai wisdom. And we should just dissect that show and it was go over certain

01:16:31.680 segments of, of wisdom. That actually would, that Johnny Lawrence drops. How many episodes or how

01:16:36.760 many seasons? Cause there's two on Netflix, right? Just two seasons. And I think season three starts in

01:16:41.720 January. And by the way, I want to, I want to be really clear. I'm not a Netflix bet. I've never

01:16:46.720 watched even game of Thrones or all these. So this is like the only like serious thing that I've ever

01:16:52.680 even like watched. And I, it's super great. It's all right. So here's the real question. Are you team

01:16:58.520 Miyagi dough or Cobra Kai? Oh, Cobra Kai all day. For sure. For sure. Cobra Kai all day. If any of you

01:17:06.480 think differently, stop listening, unsubscribe to this podcast. All right, let's wrap it up, man.

01:17:13.920 All right. So guys, we mentioned this earlier, but to submit questions for future AMAs or just to

01:17:21.800 join the conversation, you can do so on Facebook at facebook.com slash order of man. And of course,

01:17:27.600 to learn more about the iron council, our exclusive brotherhood, go to order of man.com slash iron

01:17:32.580 council. And, you know, one of the questions earlier, just to go back to it was how do we,

01:17:39.260 how do we take this coddling of America and get past the celebration of mediocrity and victimhood

01:17:47.320 and rise up and celebrate masculinity and strength and growth and rising above circumstances?

01:17:55.540 You get on the court in life and you take action. And one of the actions that you guys can take is

01:18:01.060 sharing this message because that's literally what this podcast is all about. And you could do so by

01:18:06.300 joining us on YouTube, subscribing to the podcast, sharing episodes. I'm assuming it's Cody or you,

01:18:13.360 but like we have snippets of different aspects of podcasts. So you can get a short one minute,

01:18:19.360 two minute, five minute video of a particular subject and easily share that with people

01:18:24.280 where they don't have to listen to the whole, you know, hour or hour and a half of the podcast.

01:18:29.020 So look to those YouTube videos, share messages and, and help us spread the word. And, um, another

01:18:36.680 way you can do that is follow Mr. Mickler on Instagram and, uh, Twitter at Ryan Mickler. And

01:18:42.080 of course, uh, wearing the swag. So that's right. I thought you were going to say the way you do that

01:18:46.840 is by being bad-ass by being bad-ass. I should actually. That's I'm, I'm thinking of a t-shirt

01:18:53.480 all of a sudden. Yeah. Heck yeah. All right, guys. Hey, look, we appreciate you. We're glad

01:18:58.820 to have you guys in iron council. And even if you're not, you know, we're glad you're listening

01:19:02.580 and tuning in, showing up as fathers and husbands and leaders in your community and you're leading

01:19:07.020 your families and your people. Well, and that's what we need. I mean, we're, we're right on the

01:19:10.880 heels of this presidential election, obviously turbulent times. Um, you know, I don't see it getting

01:19:16.900 better regardless of who wins. I just don't, I see it becoming more divisive, more, more polarizing.

01:19:23.480 And I think there's a real opportunity in these interesting times to step up and lead with

01:19:30.620 dignity and class and honor and respect and, and, and do the right things. And, and we have an

01:19:36.000 opportunity to do that. And it starts with you first. We talked a lot about that in the podcast,

01:19:39.520 and then it starts with your family from there. And then it starts to trickle out into your

01:19:44.000 neighborhoods, your communities, and potentially even a movement similar to what we're doing here,

01:19:48.360 but it starts with you. And that's what this whole podcast is about. So, uh, we'll be back

01:19:53.160 on Friday for the Friday field notes with a, uh, either second term president or a new president,

01:20:00.920 which should be interesting regardless. And, uh, we'll just keep driving on. It doesn't matter.

01:20:06.520 We're going to keep driving on and doing the things that we do. So we appreciate you guys.

01:20:09.200 And like I said, we'll be back Friday until then go out there, take action and become the man.

01:20:13.020 Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your life

01:20:18.600 and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.

Order of Man - November 04, 2020

The Trap of Distraction, When Empathy Goes Wrong, and the Wisdom of Cobra Kai ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

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