VIC BLENDS | Turning Your Struggles Into Strengths
Episode Stats
Length
1 hour and 6 minutes
Words per Minute
227.01698
Summary
Victor Fontanez is a 22-year-old barber who has made a name for himself by offering practical life advice to the young men he serves in his community in Atlanta, Georgia. He's gained national attention for his approach to reaching young men in the Atlanta community and has become one of the most sought after barbers in the country.
Transcript
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You guys have heard me talk a lot about our role as protectors, providers, and presiders,
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not only within the walls of our home, but also within our communities. Not only do we have the
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opportunity to give back to those in need, we actually have a moral obligation to do so,
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especially if we have the means to do it. My guest today is a man who is doing exactly that.
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His name is Victor Fontanez. You may know him as Vic Blenz, and he has made a name for himself
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through offering practical life advice for the young men that he gives haircuts to
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as he serves his community in Atlanta. Vic is 22 years old, but you're going to hear so much
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incredible wisdom come from him. And frankly, I mean, I scheduled a podcast, but I was honestly
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taken back by how much this man inspired me personally to do and to be better for myself.
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You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly charge
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your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time. You are not
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easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong. This is your life. This is who you are.
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This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done, you can call
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yourself a man. Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Michler. I'm the host. I'm also the
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founder of the Order of Man podcast, a movement. Welcome here and welcome back. Glad you're tuning
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in. Man, I can't tell you how incredible it is to see what this thing has done over the past seven.
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We're over seven years into this thing now. I could not have imagined in my wildest dreams
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what opportunities this would present, what it would mean to culture, what it would mean to society,
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what it would mean to millions and millions, literally millions. That's so strange to say even
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around the, around the U S around the planet. Ah, man, I'm humbled. I'm honored that we could
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bring these conversations to you and help this mission of reclaiming and restoring masculinity.
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We've got a very powerful podcast today. His name is Vic Fontanis. He goes by Vic blends on the socials.
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And we'll talk more about that in a minute. Before we get into that, I just want to mention that we've
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got a couple of events coming up that I want you to be very aware of and attend. If you can,
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the first one is the man in caged event. This is an event with Steven Mansfield, Bedros Koulian,
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John Lovell with warrior poet society, uh, Tanner Guzzi, a good and long-term friend of mine,
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Jack Donovan, Matt Boudreau, founder of Acton Academy. He's partnered up with Tim Kennedy guys.
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We've got an incredible lineup of guys at this event. So if you can make it to central Northern
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California on May 7th, please do. And if you want all of the details on what that looks like and
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what you'll experience and what this will be like, go to manuncaged.com slash live manuncaged.com
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slash live get registered. We only have, we started with a hundred spots. We're probably less than half
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of that right now. So it's a manuncaged.com slash live get signed up ASAP and get your butt out to
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California. We're going into the belly of the beast in California to talk about reclaiming and
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restoring masculinity again, manuncaged.com slash live. All right, let me get to Vic because this,
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I was going to say kid that's, he's not a kid. This young man, I will say he's 22 years old
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is phenomenal. He's going to blow you away. One of my all-time favorite podcasts. He's from a small
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town in North Carolina. He's gained national attention for his approach to reaching the young
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men in Atlanta. His name is Victor Fontana's. He goes by Vic blends. As I said earlier on the socials,
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a lot of you may have seen him. He's got a presence of over 10 million people on Instagram,
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on Tik TOK. This guy started cutting hair in his mom's garage. And, and at this point,
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he's quite literally becoming one of the most renowned celebrity barbers. He doesn't talk about
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that a whole lot, but, but he is, uh, and frankly, business moguls in the country, but more important
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than all of that, Vic has an incredible heart to serve men, uh, and has been working even to establish
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the very first barber school in the California state penitentiary, uh, to give those men a chance
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to contribute to society and live life in a very meaningful way. So gentlemen, I hope you enjoy
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this podcast and I hope you're inspired as much as I was inspired by it personally.
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Yeah. I've been, uh, I've been really excited to have you cause I think the conversations you're
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having from what I've seen with, with the young men that you're, you know, cutting their hair,
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like that's what people need now more than ever. I think there's a huge, huge void in masculinity
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and manliness and men stepping up to help a lot of these young men. I'm really curious though,
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where, where that desire and ambition comes from.
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I mean, the desire to want to reach out and help people and ultimately inspire them. You know,
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it was an idea that I had starting in eighth grade, right? It was the first time I discovered
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what motivational speaking was. I was running track and I remember my coach vividly telling me
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that track is a mental sport. For you to run, you have to have your mind right, right? If you,
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if you come ready on race day, you could be, you could win the race. Yeah. So I was like, man,
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how do I get my mind right? So I started going on YouTube and searching best motivational speeches,
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trying to get my mind, you know, ready the night before to go run. And I discovered who Eric Thomas
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was, man. So yeah, I was watching motivational speaking and to see the power that somebody could
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have in their voice alone to make me feel the way, to be ready to run the next day. That was
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something that, that sparked it for me. I was like, man, this is dope. So, you know, through high
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school, I'm listening to other motivational speakers. I'm going through the hallways and while
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everybody's playing, you know, music through their ears and I'm the one walking to, you know,
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third period of science playing, you know, if you want, you, you got to want it as bad
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as you want to breathe. So I'm like trying to get hyped through high school. And as I was running
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track and running across country and boxing and doing all these sports, like getting my
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mental was what was important for me, but it was never something that I think people wanted
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to hear from me. And that stopped me from doing it. I wanted to pursue that journey because
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I didn't think that I looked the part. I didn't think that I sounded the part. I didn't think
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my age was going to be able to match the part of what a motivational speaker should
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look like or sound like. So I never really pursued that. So coming into just a couple
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of years ago, I say about, you know, right when, right before COVID started, before I
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moved to Atlanta, I started doing a few videos wanting to speak. And at that moment, I'm just
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just talking whatever I would hear on YouTube and trying to dabble in it and just saying the
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generic motivational things. And, you know, it was doing all right. It wasn't doing what I
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expected it to do or what I envisioned it to do. And I stopped, you know, I let all the
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hate and all the people on Instagram that told me to stop doing that shit, to shut up and cut
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hair and to stop, you know, trying to speak and be somebody on, on, on Instagram. I let
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that all get to me and ultimately it stopped me from pursuing that dream that I had.
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And then when COVID hit and, you know, I can't cut hair anymore and the livelihood of what I built
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my business and my brand on was took it from me. I'm sitting at the house stuck. And the quote that
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I heard in the middle of the pandemic was, don't let what you're good at define who you are. Who are
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you? If you can't do what you're good at. So when I heard that, I'm sitting at the house thinking
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like, damn, who is Victor Fonson as if I can never cut hair again? That was a question that I had to ask
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myself and challenge myself on because I've built my brand and my, my likeliness to, you know,
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attach to this one thing. And, you know, it, God took it from me and I didn't have a, I didn't have
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a say so whether I'm able to go do that or not. So now I'm limited on the impact I thought I could
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bring to the world. And I think that the pandemic, you know, and sorry to anybody, you know, I pray for
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anybody that has gone through a hard time during that pandemic or has lost somebody or gone through a
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time that has sent them back. Um, I think, you know, as humans, you know, we're chasing the flesh
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our whole lives. And it's very rare that we all get stopped and get told to sit down by God and say,
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let me take control of what we're supposed to be doing here. And that's what I felt like the
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pandemic was for me. It was that I was chasing this barbering, you know, dream of cutting all these
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celebrities and rappers and being this hair cutter that, you know, God's plan for me was
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different from day one, right? Like it was already written in the things that I was supposed to do
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and accomplish. And until that pandemic came and it came and I was forced to sit down and stop doing
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so, you know, I wasn't really woke to what he had written for me. So that's why I started speaking
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more at is when I couldn't do the one thing I thought I was only good at.
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Yeah. It's, it's always interesting because, and I found very much the same way as like when we find
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a path that we want to be on, or we find, uh, you know, maybe somebody that we, we, uh, resonate
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with, we think, Oh, I got to do it like him. Right. And, and then it doesn't work for us the same way,
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but it's found that the best thing you can do is found in doing it different as being different.
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So when you say, yeah, I don't look the part, I don't speak the part, I got the age, all that kind
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of stuff. You thought that was a hindrance, but if you tap into that and unlock that, that's actually
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probably what set you on the path. It's the strength. It's the, that's the strength. And
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you know, I've reminded people of that now that all the things that you think make you different
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for negative reasons are the things that make you different for positive reasons. Right. I thought
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I wasn't old enough to be able to speak about things that people will relate to. Guess what?
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That makes me different because they've never heard a young man talk about it the way that I have.
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Right. I thought my voice sounded too weird to be on a microphone. Guess what? That's why when
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people hear me speak out now, they say, oh, I heard your voice and I turned around and it was you,
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right? Like everything about you that you feel like is holding you back from pursuing the dream
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that you have and the way you envision yourself, those are all the strengths. And once you believe
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in those things and you find a lot of, you know, you find that confidence in it, everything will
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change, right? You got to love yourself to do so. What's it like now that I've seen the last couple
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of videos that you put up where again, you're, you're cutting these young men's hair where they
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actually recognize you. I watched one the other day and it was a young man and he was like, I can't,
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I can't believe this is happening. This is crazy. Cause nobody would have recognized you when you
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started. They probably thought you're some strange, weird dude. You probably still get that.
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But then to have somebody actually acknowledge and recognize you, how does that feel? What does,
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what does that feel like? I mean, it's a surreal feeling. I don't think it's something for me
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that I'll ever get old. You know, it's very hard now because like I'm around a lot of successful
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people and I see them like mad that people come up and they want to take pictures and they want to
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support them. But like, for me, this is everything I pray for word for word. Exactly. And I, and I
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always tell myself that if you ask God to eat and he fills your plate up, you got to keep up with
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your appetite. So everything that I got coming forth to me, like, this is what I asked for. So who am I to
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be ungrateful for the things that God has given me now? So to have a young kid say, Oh, wow,
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you're Vic blends. Like I can watch your videos. I want a haircut. Like, man, I prayed for that to
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happen one day because I remember sitting in the garage, you know, going on live with nobody joining
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the live or nobody watching the videos and nobody supporting. Like I remember those times and I could
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still feel it. Like I feel it vividly and I remind myself of those things every day. So when these
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blessings come forth to me, I don't want to take it for granted. I don't want to act like
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always nothing now. You know, the fact that somebody is inspired, but what I do is the
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ultimate gift and I will never take it for granted. You know, I remember that day, like it
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wasn't too long ago. So like we was trying to go out and shoot a video. And as much as people know
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who I am, sometimes when we go out there and try to bless people with free cuts to have
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conversations, sometimes we strike out. Sometimes we don't find nobody. Sometimes, you know,
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the people we ask, everybody's just too busy or you got something else going on. It doesn't always
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end up as successful as we think. And I've posted videos of all the no's we might get in a day, but
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we went to this random park and we sat down and I'm just looking at the water thinking,
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and I just hear this kid behind me and he's like, wait. Oh, he called you out. He called me out.
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Oh, that's funny. And I'm like, what's up, man? He's like, oh my gosh, I watched a video. You that
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dude? I'm like, yeah. And he knows it's a young, it's a young man. So, you know, before I cut or
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do anything with young kids, I always got to ask parent permission. I'm not out there trying to
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make content of nobody's kids without having a thorough conversation with parents.
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There's a lot of weirdos out there too. A lot of weirdos out there. Yeah. I don't want to be that
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guy that's just doing this weird stuff for social media. So I just wanted to be, you know,
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as transparent as I can with the parents and they were all cool with him, man. And they were just for
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anything else to make the kid happy, which I appreciate it as well.
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Yeah. What are the, what are some trends that you're hearing from these young men? I mean,
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I'm sure there's things you hear a bunch, you hear it over and over again. Um, are there things that
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you hear that, that, you know, cut, cut you deep or, or impact you more deeply than others when you
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hear about some of these stories that these guys are going through? I mean, what they're dealing with.
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Yeah. I mean, everything that they go through is so different. And, you know, like a lot of people
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always ask me what was the most impactful conversation I might've had. And like, everybody goes through
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different things. And I think that's the true beauty of what I do. And, you know, we're exploring
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the human mind, you know, like everybody's got different thoughts and different things that
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they've been challenged with or gone through. And every kid goes through something different.
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Right. I think a lot of kids now are going through, through, through the bullying age,
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right. Middle school and high school. And they're trying to find out who themselves are trying to
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figure out what their path is or what they really want to do. And that's the thing that I try to
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encourage them to do is just find out who you are and stick to it. Right. Because I wish I would have
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done so earlier in high school. You know, I got my best friend here watching as well. And I just
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wish that I would have known who I was a long time ago, the same way that he did because he knew
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who himself was. And we always joke about it, but he got into a lot of fights in high school.
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And I'm like, damn, I'm like, why are you fighting so much? But it was because he knew who he was.
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And when he saw some shit that he didn't like or some shit that he didn't agree with,
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he spoke on it. And if I could go back, I would have just spent more time with myself instead of
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trying to blend in and be with certain groups or be accepted. That was something that I admired
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about my friend and I picked up on. And now I can learn from that experience and push it forward to
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other young kids to just try to stick by what they believe in and what they really want to do.
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Yeah. So one of the things I know you talk a lot about is your dad. It sounds like you had a great
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relationship with your dad. And so what's it like coming from that position of having this relationship
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with your father to seeing a lot of probably these young men and dealing with the people that you do
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who don't have those male influences in their lives? Why speak to them directly when you come
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from a position where you're like, yeah, I had all of that. Was there something else that said,
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No, I just see a lot of power in my age. To be 22 and be given the knowledge that I have from God,
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I know it's not for selfish reasons. I know it's not just for myself to benefit off of.
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So from a dad perspective, you could feel me when, and I could feel it for myself. Like,
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I remember my parents trying to teach me things and I was like, man, you don't know what I'm
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going through. You don't know what I feel like.
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Yeah, too big of a disconnect. And it's like all the things that our parents have been telling us
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our whole life growing up are the things that we needed to hear, but we didn't want to hear it
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from them. So I'm looking at myself as a 22 year old man. Now, you know, 18, 19, when I started
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picking up some of these things, like I was blessed with a lot of knowledge at a young age.
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And I feel like it's to be a vessel to other young kids that might not have that outlet to listen to.
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Right. Cause some of us don't have the father figures that I might've had, but if I'm able to
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bridge the gap and listen and hear from a guy with experience and age, and I could get the message,
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guess what? I just want to give it back out to the ones that might not hear it and might not see
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it from the guys like you. Yeah. So I just see power in my age. Yeah. That makes a lot of sense.
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I see that too. Cause I think there's probably, you were talking about it earlier on Instagram or
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wherever people telling you to shut up and just cut hair. And, and so I could see how the age might be
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a perceived barrier, but again, that's what makes it strong is that you're so you're closer to them in
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age than maybe their parents or their grandparents or whatever. Uh, you know, talking to them as an
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authority figure and somebody just talking to them. It was more so just like a, a burning
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motivation that, that I've always had while we were younger to, to, cause we, we don't really have
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for this generation, right. For my generation being, you know, 18, 19, 20, 21, we don't have
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a figure or a person to look up to. That's going to say, Oh, this is what we need to do to push this
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generation forward and achieve the things we want to achieve. Everybody our age has popped on social
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media for, you know, no offense to it, you know, for something that is probably quick, you know,
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that it might be just dancing or rapping or music or whatever. And all these are great art forms,
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but a lot of these guys are telling kids to pop pills, to do drugs, to slide on the ops, whatever,
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you know, whatever they might want to put out there. But like, who do we have for our age to look
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up to that's going to show kids, this is what real success might look like. This is what you're really
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going to have to go through. These are the emotions you're going to have to handle. These are the things you
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might have to battle with your friends and the real shit, the real shit that might not be the
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coolest to look at. It might not be the coolest to hear, you know, and I get it. Like I want to be
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a motivational speaker. A lot of our kids, you know, a lot of the people our age, they want to go get
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turnt up. They want to go drink and smoke, right? So I want to be the guy that's like, nah, I'm going
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to be in this other lane here. I'm not going to drink. I'm not going to smoke. I'm going to go through
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the shit and I'm going to put it out exactly the way that I'm going through it. So y'all can learn from
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the shit that I have to go through. Like we didn't have that and we, we, I'm trying to be it now, but
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that was the motivation. Like who do we have to look up to? When you were, uh, when you were growing
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up and you're talking about, uh, the way that you were different than most of your peers, you know,
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they were doing things that you weren't and you were listening to motivational speeches and trying
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to get on track. What was the temptation to deviate from that difficult from you in, in your
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surroundings or were you so convicted in it that it just was a non-issue? I mean, I was extremely
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convicted. I knew exactly what I had to do. And I, and I stood by that for, for a lot of the times,
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man, but it's always been times where, you know, I've slipped up and fell into temptation and fell
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into the influence of my friends want to, you know, want me to come kick it with them again or go
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drink or go smoking. Every time that I do so, I learned my lesson, right? Like every time that I let go
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of that conviction I had with myself and I fell into the temptation of what people wanted me to do,
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I learned my lesson every time. It always bit me right back. Right. So I just remind myself of
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that, you know, like, yo, I know where I got to go. I know what I got to do and I'll get punished by
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God every time that I go against that. You know, I remember, you know, one of the days that it was
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really the last day that I hung out with my, my high school friend, you know, like I don't smoke,
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don't drink. It's not something I normally do. We used to do it early in high school. You know,
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like every kid, you got to do it once. You got to get through that. To know like, oh, this is not
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for me. I ain't going to act like I'm no saint. You know, we used to get turned up too, but it's
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just, you got to go through it to know this ain't for me. So, you know, I was just graduated going to
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barber school, trying to pursue like this dream that I had and I was locked in, right? All my friends
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going to college and I'm the one that sat back in my brother's garage with no AC trying to make
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shit shake out of this tiny ass garage. And, you know, I just, you know, not that I cut my friends
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off and I'm just going a different direction. There's no love lost, right? If it's a real
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friendship, if you got to do what you got to do, then I got to respect that and push that forward,
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right? I shouldn't be mad at you for doing what you have to do. All of our lives are different. So
00:20:01.020
sometimes as friends, some can't see that. Yeah. So I'm not trying to, you know, disregard the
00:20:06.780
friendship that we had, but I'm just trying to make sure I do what I have to do.
00:20:11.020
And it was one night that they invited me back out. They're like, yo, Vic, we ain't seen you in a
00:20:15.040
while. We really want you to come hang out, come hang out with us, come chill with us, come drink
00:20:18.680
with us, go whatever. It's a Sunday night. I got barber school the next day, 8 a.m. I'm just feeling
00:20:24.260
the guilt, right? Because we've been friends for, you know, going on 10 years. I'm like, man, you're
00:20:28.740
right. Y'all are my friends. You've been my day ones, whatever. Like, all right, I miss y'all too.
00:20:33.660
I'm going to come drink with y'all. But y'all got to make sure I get home in the morning because I got
00:20:37.880
barber school. That was my only non-negotiable make sure I get home in the morning. Right.
00:20:42.680
That's all I wanted. Like, I don't care how lit I get. As long as you get me to my bed,
00:20:46.280
I'll fucking, I'll figure a way to get up and brush my teeth. I'll make it to school.
00:20:50.740
So I go there. We start drinking. I pass out. Right. I get drunk. I get, I get messed up or
00:20:57.240
whatever. I follow this. I was throwing up. I remember, you know, falling asleep in the
00:21:01.080
bathroom, woke up in the morning. I'm still in the bathroom, still by the toilet. I'm sleeping
00:21:07.120
in the, in the, in the crevice of the toilet. I'm like, damn, you know, like what happened
00:21:11.800
to all the friends that said they got me instead of they're going to get me right back to the
00:21:15.100
crib. And, you know, the ones that said they were going to make sure that I get my shit done
00:21:18.780
for the better of me, not just for what I could do for them this night. They all left.
00:21:22.920
I woke up, I'm late. You know, it's like, it's like 11 o'clock. School's already started.
00:21:27.620
I'm, you know, and barber school works off hours. So you got to get the faster hours and
00:21:31.640
the faster you graduate. So that's really bothering me because they knew how much this
00:21:35.100
shit meant to me. And I, I just fell into it, you know? And what it was, was that I had
00:21:40.120
to learn that time didn't equal loyalty. And it doesn't matter how long you've known
00:21:44.240
somebody, if they're not there for the betterment of yourself and to push
00:21:48.760
you forward as a friend, you don't need them. It doesn't matter how long you've known
00:21:52.640
somebody, you're right. Like time doesn't equal loyalty at the end of the day. And I've
00:21:57.240
met guys in the last couple of years that have stood by me, that have done more for
00:22:01.400
me genuinely than I could ever ask for from anybody that I might've known as we were
00:22:05.360
a kid. So that was a lesson that I learned. And from that day forward, like I, it was
00:22:11.460
hard for me to speak to those guys. And it was just, like I said, like, you know,
00:22:15.200
every time that I found that temptation, I learned my lesson.
00:22:19.080
I like that you're saying too, because a lot of times people think that, um, they
00:22:22.860
need to deliberately and intentionally cut friends out. But you also say what you just
00:22:27.440
said is that, you know, you evolve, you grow, you find new friends and it just kind of
00:22:31.000
over time gradually replaces that. If you're replacing it with good activities and things
00:22:35.960
that are actually going to drive the, drive the needle forward.
00:22:38.840
Yeah. Sometimes the separation, you know, they say you got to separate to elevate and
00:22:42.460
it's not you switching up or changing up on your day ones. Like if you, my boy and you
00:22:49.360
really fuck with me and you want me to win, then you shouldn't want me doing the shit
00:22:52.740
that isn't going to better me. You shouldn't be wanting that for me as a friend, right?
00:22:56.720
You shouldn't be mad at me for not coming to smoke a drink with y'all because I'm trying
00:23:00.580
to go and pursue my dream. Do you get any pushback from those guys? I mean, it
00:23:05.840
sounds like you're not as tight maybe as you once were, but do you get any pushback
00:23:09.640
from, you know, people in, in, in your past, whether it's friends or even relatives
00:23:14.000
who are like, Oh, look what you're trying to be. I know who you really are. Look what
00:23:17.620
you're trying to be now. This isn't you. Do you get any of that sort of thing?
00:23:20.340
I mean, whether I do or I don't like I'm at peace with myself and that's the most
00:23:24.820
important thing. I can't live my life off the opinion of whatever's my think. I know
00:23:30.060
I'm following everything that God told me to do. I know I'm happy with myself. I know
00:23:33.840
I'm making an impact on this world. And if anybody got something else to say about
00:23:37.060
it, like fuck them. And that's honestly how I feel. And I know that my heart has
00:23:42.060
been right for everybody. You know, I've done right through my heart for anybody
00:23:45.780
that I've came across and I've never went into any relationship with non genuine
00:23:50.180
intentions for them. And I know that I gave those guys my genuine love. I know I
00:23:54.820
gave them my, my, my best foot forward every time. And no matter how they feel
00:23:58.940
about me now, I know that I could look back and say, I never did anybody dirty to
00:24:03.000
get to where I'm at. And I could live with myself. I could look in the mirror
00:24:05.840
every day and feel confident in looking at that man and saying, yo, you did right.
00:24:09.500
Everything you got come up for yourself. You earned. Yeah. You know, so no matter how
00:24:12.800
they feel about it, you know, I'm going to do that, that, that, that word is bond,
00:24:16.740
right? Like word is bond to me. And whatever the last thing I told you is the last
00:24:20.760
thing I'm standing on, even if we haven't spoke for years. And the last thing I told
00:24:25.060
every one of those guys was I love you, right? I just got to love you from a
00:24:28.700
distance, right? You can't love everybody the same way that you love them forever.
00:24:32.580
Some people you got to learn how to love differently. And that's what I learned
00:24:35.380
that all the people that I love that I, sometimes I got to love them from, from
00:24:39.600
different places. I can't love everybody in this immediate circle right now.
00:24:42.880
Cause if I do so, I'm just going to open myself up to get hurt more and more.
00:24:46.680
So I love all those guys, you know, like I'll never forget the times we spent, but
00:24:50.960
remember time don't equal loyalty. So no matter how long I've known y'all, I can't
00:24:55.040
love y'all the same way that I loved y'all back then because our lives are just
00:24:58.080
very different right now. And there's things that I got to protect, whether it's
00:25:01.400
my family, whether it's my emotional happiness, what, you know, whatever it is,
00:25:05.660
got to love them differently. So they know I got love for them. You know,
00:25:09.300
What do you, what do you look for in people that you want in your circle now?
00:25:12.200
Like when you're, you know, you have people coming to your life and it's
00:25:15.460
interesting as you become probably more popular as you will and more well-known,
00:25:20.340
you know, those are things you're going to have to look out for. These, are these
00:25:22.660
genuine people? Are they trying to take advantage of me?
00:25:25.040
Like, what is it that you're looking for that you want people in your corner,
00:25:28.880
I mean, all you can really look for is a genuine heart, right? Like everybody
00:25:31.920
doesn't have to have a million followers to come rock me. You don't have to have
00:25:35.300
a million dollars to come rock me. You don't got to be driving no expensive shit
00:25:38.940
to come rock me. Like all you can really look for at this point is a genuine heart
00:25:42.460
because that's probably the most scarce thing. Once you become successful, you, you,
00:25:47.180
you know, you get a certain amount of equity, your name, you don't have that
00:25:51.140
anymore. It's, it's, they say it's lonely at the top. And that's a very real statement
00:25:56.460
because to get to that top, you got to go through a lot of pain. You got to go through
00:26:01.100
a lot of people that wanted different things out of their relationship with you that said
00:26:05.880
they were there for you and really weren't. And it's lonely at the top because of the
00:26:09.120
amount of pain that you got to go through, the amount of people that are going to walk
00:26:11.600
in and out of your life and you sort of get into this defense mode. So I remind myself
00:26:16.320
that no matter where I get to in my life, look for the genuineness, like, right. Look
00:26:19.960
where the love is. And yeah, everybody doesn't have to bring, you know, like I said, a million
00:26:26.240
followers to the table to come kick it with me. I'm not that type of guy. I'm going to
00:26:29.560
look where somebody's heart is at. And if your heart is in the right place, sometimes
00:26:33.140
if all you can offer me is a conversation, that's enough because we don't get a lot of
00:26:36.560
that. Once you become, you know, this, this, this figure that people see, right. You
00:26:41.360
don't, it's not something that you always get. What's something that you talk about
00:26:44.800
going through a lot of the pain? What's some of the pain that, uh, you, you know,
00:26:48.100
you remember a story of, of you dealing with some of this hardship on your, your
00:26:52.740
path to try to follow in. And I don't want to put words in your mouth, but in God's
00:26:56.680
plan for you. Yeah. I mean, yo, the, I mean, some of the hardest shit that I had to
00:27:01.760
learn. And obviously I'm, you know, I'm young, I'm a young guy. So yeah, I ain't
00:27:04.980
gone through, you know, having kids and a wife and stuff. I know that's the word. So
00:27:08.840
people are probably like, well, yeah, so what have you gone through? Right. So what
00:27:11.660
have you gone through? But you know, like one of the hardest lessons I had to
00:27:15.640
learn was that the people, some people just, some people want to see you do good,
00:27:20.000
but not better than them. And that was a very hard lesson for me. And I remember
00:27:24.220
having, you know, mentors of, of mine that I looked up to in my hometown that I put
00:27:28.900
heart and soul into and would, would, would go to learn from and seek from, and they
00:27:33.860
will push me forward. And I feel like these are guys I want to learn from. And, you
00:27:37.300
know, these are the people that inspire me every day. And the second that you get an
00:27:42.020
inch on somebody, it immediately goes from support to envy to hate. And it's, it's
00:27:49.100
sporadic. It's almost instant. And that was a lesson that I had to learn. And that
00:27:53.300
hurt me a lot. You know, like it was guys that I looked up to in my city that, you
00:27:58.980
know, like I've, I've stood by, I've like you, if you were the barber, I would go and
00:28:03.020
stand right next to you on your shoulder for hours. And I would, I would sit there
00:28:06.900
and I would watch you cut. I would ask you questions and try to learn from you.
00:28:10.040
And, you know, it was a, it was a cute thing for them at that time. But like, I
00:28:13.540
was never into this just to be somebody's sidekick or just to be, you know, oh, like
00:28:19.020
sitting under somebody wing. Like I give gratitude and I give grace to anybody
00:28:23.680
that's ever helped me. Even the guys that hurt me now, I will never be ungrateful for
00:28:28.660
all the things that they taught me to get to where I'm at, no matter how the
00:28:31.400
relationship might've turned. So like, I will never, you know, disregard somebody's
00:28:35.580
help towards my career or my life. But, you know, I remember walking into, you
00:28:40.340
know, one of an old mentor of mine, like to his barbershop at nighttime. It was
00:28:45.300
like 8 p.m. I just got done cutting for the, for the whole day. I was cutting from
00:28:50.060
like 6 a.m. to like 8 p.m. And I was just getting off to go have my first meal
00:28:54.800
for the day. Like I was working strenuous hours and I, you know, drove by his
00:28:59.540
barbershop. I see him stealing their cut and I go in and I tap him on to show him
00:29:03.220
like, what's up, bro? First thing he says when he turns to me, mind you, like, this
00:29:07.100
is a dude, we're close. I would, I would seek, you know, knowledge from, seek love
00:29:10.880
from, seek like inspiration from. I'm thinking I'm about to just go in there and
00:29:14.960
say what's up to the homie. I tap him on the back. He got a shot full of people.
00:29:18.520
He turned back and say, oh, what's up, bro? You Hollywood now. Oh, right. You don't want
00:29:22.760
to shout me out on Instagram. What's up? I'm like, like, what is it? What are we even
00:29:26.900
talking about, bro? What are we talking about? Some Instagram ass shit right
00:29:31.440
now? Like, like, where's the, where's, this is real love right here. Like, you're
00:29:36.960
talking to me about some shit, a virtual number on a phone and that stopping you
00:29:41.780
from seeing the love that I have from you? Like, I mean, I ain't even eat today, but
00:29:45.800
I'm gonna make sure I say what's up to you before I even go put food in my mouth and
00:29:49.400
you over here talking to me about some Instagram ass shit. Like, that's, that's the
00:29:53.440
shit that fucking be hurting, man. Because I just be having love for my
00:29:57.900
people, man. And others are in it for different reasons. And like I said, like
00:30:02.040
everybody doesn't have this genuine intent for you and they want to seek some
00:30:07.240
other shit from you. And the second you get an inch on some people, it turns very
00:30:11.040
quickly. And, you know, this dude looked me in my face and told me that I would
00:30:14.760
never be shit. I cut in a garage and that's all I ever be. Yeah. That was it.
00:30:19.940
That's crazy. I mean, it hurt. It brought me to tears. I left that shop so
00:30:24.080
confused. And, you know, all you could really do at that time is thank God that
00:30:27.960
the things went that way because all that was was a snake that was in my
00:30:30.960
grass. That's all it was was a snake in my grass. And sometimes when the people
00:30:35.540
hurt you that bad, you got to be grateful for them because that never
00:30:39.460
happened. He never showed me his true colors. I probably would have still had
00:30:42.700
that dude around me to this day. Yeah. Still would have been bringing him
00:30:45.320
around, still would have been sharing all the things that I had to work for
00:30:47.960
today with him because I would have just had this loyalty. You know, I would
00:30:51.980
have been stuck to this loyalty with him through those times. Like and if he if
00:30:55.860
he that didn't happen to me like me or even happen with the people that it has
00:31:01.140
happened with, I have no idea like where my circle and my peace would be at
00:31:04.600
right now. But, you know, those are some things that really fucking cut with me
00:31:08.620
here. Yeah, I bet. So I don't mean to be condescending when I say this. So I hope
00:31:12.160
it doesn't come across because it's actually meant as a compliment. But you're 22,
00:31:15.800
22, right? So young man. But you're different than 22 year olds. Like, do you
00:31:23.320
recognize that? I mean, of course, I'm like, I'm a humble guy, but I'm also like
00:31:27.820
self aware of myself. And I just try not to. I don't like walk like you're never
00:31:35.820
going to. I don't feel that. But you're different. I'm self aware. Like I'm a smart
00:31:40.420
guy. Like, you know, and I would never downplay myself or the wittiness of what
00:31:45.200
I've been able to build. I'm very self aware that I've been given a great gift
00:31:49.320
at a young age, given a lot of potential, given a large platform, given an amazing
00:31:52.960
voice. So, of course, I get that. But it's like I said, it's for me to show others how
00:32:01.220
to get there as well. So I do get exactly what you're saying. Yeah. Is it so you've
00:32:07.160
talked a lot about your faith in God? Do you think that's what makes you
00:32:10.540
different? Are there other things where you're talking about this self
00:32:13.220
awareness? Because, yeah, 22 year olds aren't doing what you do. I mean, they're
00:32:16.980
on Instagram like they're doing that stuff, trying to get famous. But what
00:32:20.180
you're talking about and even the messages that you're sharing right now,
00:32:23.240
there's a ton of wisdom in what you're sharing that most 22 year olds just don't
00:32:27.600
have. I mean, I would be, yeah, God is a big part, but I'm not like, dog, I'm not,
00:32:33.200
I mean, my faith is everything, of course, but I'm not the dude that's like going to
00:32:38.980
just like kill y'all with the God speech. Like I'm not that type of guy. Like I got
00:32:44.840
a very strong faith. Don't get me wrong. And I'm not downplaying my faith with God.
00:32:48.200
But man, I just feel like I found out what I believe in. There are principles and
00:32:53.620
morals to being, you know, a great person that I stand on.
00:32:57.600
And I don't try to compromise that for any opportunity or any situation, any person.
00:33:02.040
And I think that that's just what I stand on. And you just don't see that a lot because
00:33:07.880
it's easy at a young age to be influenced by opportunity, by numbers, by money, by people
00:33:13.320
and trying to get this acceptance or trying to prove to people that you're different
00:33:17.780
or you're better than what you really are. But I'm just confident in myself and the
00:33:22.060
things that God got planned for me. And I know that they're coming. I know they're
00:33:24.940
down in my pipeline. Right. Like if you got faith in the plan that he got written for
00:33:30.120
you, I don't care how long it's going to take. I know it's coming. So I know that the
00:33:34.140
things that I pray for and things that I envision are coming. So I'm just confident in that.
00:33:37.800
And I'm willing to take the patience I need for it to happen. And I just, you know, like
00:33:42.680
I said, I mean, I give a lot of credit to my hometown, though, as well. Growing up in
00:33:46.280
Fayetteville, North Carolina, in a very small town, not really seeing a lot of success come
00:33:50.860
out of there. But the ones that do become successful, we learn a lot from them. You
00:33:54.900
know, we got Jay Cole. We got my brother, Dennis Smith Jr. We got Murray now. We got a lot
00:33:59.700
of dope figures from the hometown that come out. And when you're a person that gets an
00:34:04.560
opportunity to make it on a national level from a town that nobody ever looks at, you
00:34:10.540
got to you got to carry that a certain way. So I'm just extremely humbled and grateful
00:34:15.360
that, you know, God chose me out of my hometown. And I hope that I can shine a light on the
00:34:20.300
others that might be stuck in a small inner city that have the talent, but maybe not the
00:34:24.240
resources. So, you know, coming from Fayetteville, bro, like I just got to be humble. Like, you
00:34:29.060
know, shit could be worse. Like, who am I to be, you know, ungrateful now or, you
00:34:33.400
know, walk with, like, like I'm bigger than who I am, man. Like, fuck, I done beat the
00:34:37.580
odds already, man. Like everything now is just a blessing.
00:34:41.900
All right, you guys, let me hit the pause button on the conversation very quickly. I
00:34:45.700
talked about it briefly, but I need to talk about the man in caged event again. It may
00:34:50.800
not come as a surprise to you, but I believe that society at large is dead set on undermining
00:34:56.640
and ridiculing and dismissing masculinity at every single turn. And as you know, I've been
00:35:02.500
hell bent on correcting that problem so much so that I decided the end of last year to
00:35:08.700
take a trip down to Cancun. And I called up some good friends of mine because I wanted
00:35:14.820
to enlist the help of them. Bedros Koulian, John Lovell, Tanner Guzzi, Jack Donovan, Matt
00:35:22.020
Bedro, Steven Mansfield. I mean, the who's who of the masculinity space. And I wanted to
00:35:30.660
enlist them in the battle to reclaim and restore masculinity. So what we've decided to do is
00:35:39.620
we're going to be hosting our very first ever man uncaged event, May 7th, 2022. I know that
00:35:45.780
it's very short notice. We wanted to make it available. Guys are busy. Like we just, we
00:35:50.700
wanted to make it available. But again, I know it's short notice. If you can make it to central
00:35:55.340
Northern California, I guarantee that you're not going to be disappointed in this event.
00:35:59.840
Okay. So we only have limited spots. So please get registered as soon as possible at manuncaged.com
00:36:06.000
slash live manuncaged.com slash live. You're going to meet with Bedros. You're going to meet with me,
00:36:12.800
which is obviously going to be the highlight, right? Uh, John Lovell, Tanner Guzzi, Jack Donovan,
00:36:17.560
Steven Mansfield, Matt Bedro, and so many more incredible men who are all banded with me
00:36:21.980
in this fight to reclaim and restore masculinity. Again, manuncaged.com slash live. All right,
00:36:31.180
guys, do that right after the show. Cause we have limited seats for now. I'll get back to it with
00:36:35.260
Vic. Is there ever been a time in your life or even coming up where you feel like you talk about
00:36:42.600
God's plan for you might be different than the plan that you have for yourself? And how do you
00:36:47.600
differentiate between the two and decide which path you're going to follow? Yeah. I mean,
00:36:53.500
that's that, like what it said, that's the heart versus the brain, right? Like a heart versus the
00:36:58.020
brain. And you know, sometimes I, I try to follow, I follow that lead with my heart. And of course,
00:37:03.080
like sometimes you've got to think logical about situations and things like that. So
00:37:07.060
of course there's situations where I could logically think this isn't a good move for me. I get that,
00:37:12.440
but the best ideas come from, from when you have that, that fire inside and you, you kind of get
00:37:17.820
those emotions. Like you're going up a rollercoaster and when you get those type of emotions, when you
00:37:22.000
thinking about some shit you want to do, like that's the best feeling to be in. So when I, when I get
00:37:25.980
that and I, and I think about some shit that we're going to do, or we're about to get done. And I get
00:37:30.080
that like, Oh fuck, I'm going up a rollercoaster right now. I'm like, yo, I'm headed in the right
00:37:33.600
direction because if I never got that feeling for any idea I had, like I probably would still be in
00:37:38.520
favor. But when you, you get that good burning feeling like, man, I know I'm headed in the right
00:37:43.080
direction and whether I fail or whether I succeed, like I learned from it. And as long as you're
00:37:49.920
learning, you never really lose. And so, you know, I just, yeah, I mean, you know, God's plan always
00:37:56.440
come through at the end of the day, I believe. And, um, you know, even decisions that I try to make
00:38:01.240
happen that, that don't happen. I just know it wasn't meant for me and I'll chalk it up and move on to
00:38:05.460
the next one, trying to get too emotionally attached to opportunities that go left.
00:38:09.740
Or, or like you said, it, you know, you were meant to do that. It wasn't meant to pan out the way you
00:38:14.060
thought, but it was a learning opportunity. You were meant to learn that, right? You were meant to
00:38:17.320
learn that, right? Like all the, all the girlfriends we might've had that we thought were going to be
00:38:21.420
the one every time they went left, you're like, damn, you know what happened? So, you know, I was just
00:38:27.220
supposed to go through that pain because it prepared me for what's coming next. So I, I got this quote
00:38:33.080
that I heard while I was working, um, in a restaurant. They said that there's always a
00:38:37.960
test before promotion. So when I heard that, I'm like, damn, all the shit, you know, all the shit
00:38:45.020
that I'm going through that's making me go through this, you know, hurt and it's pain. It's just
00:38:51.180
preparing me for something that's way better down the road. And it's sometimes when you hear that
00:38:56.180
shit, you're in the midst of that pain. You don't even want to hear it. It's hard to hear. You don't
00:38:59.500
even want to hear that shit, man. This girl just broke my heart. She's supposed to be my wife.
00:39:03.420
She's so bad. She just left me for this other dude. I don't want to hear nothing you talking
00:39:07.080
about. And it's the faith that you got to build to say, man, I'm confident in the things that will
00:39:12.440
be meant for me will be meant for me. And all the, all the struggle, all the, all the downfall,
00:39:17.960
the pain you got to go through is just preparing you to be grateful for the things that God got coming
00:39:22.120
for you later. So when I, when I think about the friends that hurt me, you know, it prepared me to be
00:39:27.780
grateful for the friends I got now. And I know how to cherish and love those people. The mentors
00:39:32.840
that hurt me before I know how to cherish and love and grow the relationship with my mentors now in a
00:39:37.660
different way. Like I learned how to look at people. I learned how to love people differently. I learned
00:39:43.040
how to communicate with people differently through all the pain and all the bullshit I had to go through
00:39:46.860
with the people that walked in and out of my life before. There's always going to be a test before
00:39:50.320
the promotion. I may have less than 10 people in my circle right now, but out of the hundred people
00:39:55.020
that did me dirty. I know how to love these 10 people to the best 10. Yeah. One of the things
00:40:00.280
that I know is important to you, you talk about prison reform a bit. You talk about making sure
00:40:06.140
that these, these inmates who come out of prison have applicable skills, marketable skills. And
00:40:13.560
you've got a little bit of a victory in that there's in California, there's barber schools now,
00:40:18.580
right? Talk to me about that and why that's so important to you and how you see that helping these
00:40:23.680
men that come through the prison system. Yeah. I mean, y'all shout out to my brother,
00:40:27.680
Scott Budnick, you know, first and foremost for opening that, that lane of my life for me.
00:40:32.680
When, when you, when you think about like when I prayed to, to, to have impact and when I thought
00:40:38.080
about being this inspiration to people and I never thought about it in, in this lane or that lane.
00:40:44.120
I just said, that's what I want to do. And whatever God has opened for me or whatever he wants me
00:40:48.980
to be in to do so, I'm going to take. So it wasn't like I sat down before and said,
00:40:54.800
oh man, I'm going to pray to do prison reform. It's like, I prayed to have a voice. I prayed to
00:41:00.340
have impact. I prayed to use my platform. Whatever God felt was going to be meant for me will be meant
00:41:05.060
for me. So I remember just sitting at, sitting at the house and I get a DM from, from our mutual
00:41:11.680
friend, Irv Rowland. Shout out to Irv, who was a veteran NBA trainer, but also a social activist and,
00:41:17.780
you know, works in social reform. Uh, he just sent me a DM. He's like, yo,
00:41:21.920
my boy Scott Budnick wants to get in contact with you. He's a producer, produced the Hangover,
00:41:26.080
Project X, Just Mercy. And I'm like, oh, the Hangover? Yeah. Okay, bet. Give him my number.
00:41:31.560
I think this is my, I think this is my, my big opportunity on the screen. I'm about to be in
00:41:34.600
the next Hangover. Like I'm out of here. So he gives him my number. He hits me up. He's like,
00:41:39.700
hey, what's up, bro? My name is Scott Budnick, producer for the Hangover. This is down the third.
00:41:44.100
I'm like, man, what's up, bro? Like what's, what role you got for me? What's the script?
00:41:47.780
Right. He said, oh, nah, man, I work in prison reform and the people on the inside,
00:41:52.700
I really love your voice and I've been sharing your videos. I would love to bring you out to a,
00:41:56.100
to a prison in California to meet some of these guys. Right. I'm like, man, this is different.
00:42:00.040
Yeah. All right. This isn't what I'm, this is not what I imagined that, that I would be doing.
00:42:05.340
You know, like, again, it was not something I thought I could even do. I didn't think I
00:42:08.620
looked apart. I had the story for it or like had the connection for it. Or I just didn't think
00:42:13.120
that I was somewhere I could have impact that, but it's what God had in my, my plan. So I'm like,
00:42:18.580
all right, bro. You know, we get on the phone, we talked for maybe an hour and a half late night
00:42:22.300
on the phone, uh, really connected. And, you know, again, energy, man, it's, it's all about
00:42:26.600
the people that come with a genuine heart. Uh, we chopped it up. I got on a flight, maybe two weeks
00:42:31.760
later, LA. And I was in the midst of opening a creative studio. I wanted to open a creative studio
00:42:37.360
in Atlanta to, to bring together like opportunity for young creatives that might not have resources
00:42:42.940
and mentorship. Like what, like when you say creative, what, like video, like content creation,
00:42:47.960
creating content, you know, building a brand. Okay. Might've been Barbara and it might, anything
00:42:53.180
like I'm not limited to just like this, this cutting hair out. I love video production. I love
00:42:58.100
speaking. I love brand building. That's just what I, what I love. So I was about to open this 8,000
00:43:03.680
square foot building right in the heart of Midtown Atlanta, about to sign for it. It
00:43:08.460
was really, it was a hefty rent. It was definitely, it was a, I was prepared for it. I wasn't scared
00:43:13.820
to do it, but, um, that was me living in the flesh and saying, yo, this is the direction
00:43:18.060
I'm going with. I'm going to open this. I'm going to do that. And the day, right. It was,
00:43:22.680
I remember going out to LA and I was getting the contract back from my real estate agent at
00:43:27.540
the time, uh, for this commercial building. I'm about to sign the day I go to,
00:43:33.680
uh, Lancaster prison, uh, with Scott. It changed my life. And I think I'm in this direction to
00:43:39.720
open this studio, about to be locked in. It was a five year lease. Couldn't get out of
00:43:43.600
it paying like 10 grand a month. I was going to, they, I was going to be stuck. The day
00:43:48.840
I get the contract is the day we go to the prison. Can't bring your phones inside of a prison.
00:43:53.960
So I don't get to respond in time to even sign it. By the time I come out of that prison,
00:43:58.780
uh, there's, I'm like, yo, there's no way that I could, that I could stop exploring this
00:44:03.800
direction. Right. And if I was signed that contract earlier and would have had my phone
00:44:08.240
on me, I would have been locked in. I would have been on some totally other shit. So when
00:44:12.460
I left, uh, when we left that visit and we finished that weekend, Scott was like, you
00:44:16.100
know, well, there's never been a barber program in California prison history. He's like, if you
00:44:22.600
want to do so, we could start working now. It's possible. And what hit home for me in
00:44:29.360
the way that the, the reason why, you know, I, I want to see this change is because we
00:44:34.440
come from very small towns with a lack of opportunity or a lack of, you know, direction
00:44:40.120
or, or blueprint for people to make it out. And although I'm not affected personally,
00:44:44.400
like it ain't like my dad been locked up forever and I'm, you know, all this is why I want to
00:44:47.920
be here. I'm a person that has empathy for other humans. And I think as long as you
00:44:52.460
can have empathy for the things that other people go through, then you have a heart for
00:44:56.080
change. And I have empathy for growing up in the communities that we have and seeing
00:45:01.320
people be affected by incarceration in and out. And what it is, is lack of resource and
00:45:07.160
opportunity and lack of knowledge. A lot of people just don't know what they can do or
00:45:11.900
can't achieve. And I know you can't be the savior for every person out there, but you
00:45:16.420
know, if you want to see change happen, you gotta, you gotta be that change first. So if I have
00:45:21.220
an opportunity in front of me to provide men and women in the community, in these communities that
00:45:26.520
get stuck in a cycle of incarceration that have, you know, been systematically oppressed by,
00:45:31.540
if I can give them an opportunity to go back to the communities that they once hurt before
00:45:36.340
and now be able to help, then I'm doing my part, right? I'm just, I'm just fulfilling my part. And
00:45:41.680
that's all I want to do is play my part. They say the world is a stage and everybody got a role
00:45:46.640
to play. And if that's my role for right now and it's part of the movie, I'm going to do so. So
00:45:50.980
if, if I, you know, and this is providing tools, right? You teach a man, you give a man a fish to eat
00:45:56.860
for the day, you teach him how to fish to eat forever. So providing somebody with a tool like
00:46:00.860
a barber's license, you now change their role in that community from, oh, I'm going back here to
00:46:07.760
go fuck with the same homies I've been fucking with that put me in this position to be locked up like
00:46:11.520
this. I'm going to fall into the same cycle. And yes, they can go and they should be, you know,
00:46:17.020
people are going to argue and say, oh, it's, they should be, you know, strong minded and go through
00:46:21.480
the shit. But like, man, prison isn't designed for us to be, to be rehabilitated. That's not what
00:46:26.360
it is, right? It should be, but that's not what it is. You know? So a lot of these guys don't even
00:46:31.820
get the mental change to come back to the communities with a different mindset, but you're going to get
00:46:36.500
locked up, you're coming home, you're going back to the same shit, you're going back to the same people,
00:46:40.400
nothing has changed. So to give somebody now a role to come back to the communities and provide
00:46:45.340
a different perspective, to provide mentorship, to provide love, and then a haircut, like, yo,
00:46:51.100
that's different. And they're going to, they're going to make money from it. And not only are they
00:46:55.080
going to make money from it, but I'm going to show them how to make money at the highest level for it.
00:46:59.340
Like, I'm going to provide a different curriculum for them, different mentorship, different, you know,
00:47:04.120
insight on it. And hopefully they're motivated to do so because the most important role of a barber is
00:47:09.420
not just the cut that you provide, but it's the role that you play in your community as a pillar.
00:47:13.580
And that's what I want these guys to become, you know, because they have, they've had trouble
00:47:17.800
past them and they've gone through a lot of trauma and things that, you know, I pray none of us have
00:47:22.540
to go through ever, but they need to, they can speak from that experience now and be a real role
00:47:29.080
model to the kids that might be falling into the same shit because everybody needs a cut, right?
00:47:33.140
So all the kids that come through the shop, they get, they cut, they need to hear it from men that
00:47:37.180
have gone through it to say like, yo, you don't have to be in this, this path anymore. So, uh,
00:47:41.780
that, you know, it's my real motivation, man. It's just trying to make a change for the communities
00:47:44.780
that we grew up in and stop this cycle of incarceration. So, you know, we could have some
00:47:48.960
real change in our, in our lives. You're, you're right about the barbershop because they're, you
00:47:54.800
know, it's not so much anymore, but there used to be a time where all the men would get together
00:47:59.080
and they'd talk about life and they'd talk about culture and they'd work through their
00:48:02.900
differences. And then they'd bring their sons into the barber who, who their dad was getting
00:48:07.680
their haircut from. And they'd learn all these lessons from these guys. I love that. The culture
00:48:12.680
of it. Yeah. We, we grew up in a barbershop. That's, that's why I am a barber. I grew up in,
00:48:18.300
in, in a barbershop. Shout out to Barber Kings, Sean and Q, our mentors, our, our brothers, our,
00:48:24.800
our guys, like that's, we grew up in that shop. We would walk to the barbershop every Sunday
00:48:29.700
from my mom's house, from the neighborhood. And we would walk all the way down to the shop and
00:48:34.360
we were sitting there all day, really all day waiting for a cup. We getting skipped left and
00:48:39.760
right. They asking who next? Some big ass dude is standing up saying, I'm next. I know I'm next.
00:48:47.320
I'm looking at him like, yeah, you next, bro. And we just like, we will waste our whole, not wasted,
00:48:52.960
but like we would spend our whole day there just like hearing the dudes talk shit. Sean, Q, Gina,
00:48:58.420
they would just like mess with each other all day. They would like, look at, look at the, they
00:49:02.580
would look at the, the, um, the customers and be like, yo, watch this. They'd go up to the other
00:49:07.260
one and like, you know, like hit them or something like messing with them. And then it was just such
00:49:11.200
an experience to grow up there. But aside from like the funny shit that would happen there,
00:49:15.260
all the, all the walls in there were filled with history, like true history, like shit that you won't
00:49:21.500
learn in the school books. Right. It's all the shit that, um, you know, it's kind of silenced through
00:49:26.080
education nowadays and we would learn it there. We would learn about the things on the walls,
00:49:30.920
we'd have open conversations. They would, we would speak about problems going on in our city,
00:49:35.900
in our community, in the world. You know, you would, you would hear about musicians and artists
00:49:40.420
and, and, and painters and writers that you've never heard before. I would, I learned so much about
00:49:45.880
like this culture that we live in every day through living in this barbershop. And it's a beautiful
00:49:49.840
thing. And it's also a tradition that has been lost in the last couple of years through,
00:49:54.400
you know, the social media wave and things getting a little bit more personal than,
00:49:57.840
and then COVID coming. So, you know, I think it's a great thing. And ultimately, man,
00:50:02.360
this is human connection. Yeah. That's all that really comes down to it at the grand scheme of
00:50:06.100
things is human connection and mentorship. So that's like the most important thing. And that's
00:50:10.480
why we have, excuse me, such an emotional connection to it is because we went through it and we grew up in
00:50:15.820
that. What's a, what's some of the pushback that you get for some of the things you're doing within
00:50:20.980
the prison reform system? Cause, and I've changed my thought over the past, I would say a couple of
00:50:26.080
years ago. Uh, I used to think I would say things like, and I'm sure you get this, like, oh, these
00:50:30.820
people have lost their right to that, to have education. Why should I pay for their education
00:50:35.000
when they've proven, you know, that they're, they're not going to honor it or whatever it might be.
00:50:40.140
But I thought to myself over the past couple of years, you know, what, well, what's the alternative?
00:50:45.320
Lock them up and let them continue to go through that cycle. Or is there an opportunity for society to,
00:50:50.780
provide an education that either A, wasn't available to them or B, they didn't take advantage
00:50:56.920
of both can exist. Um, and, and do, do a good job for those people and do a good job for society as a
00:51:03.240
whole. I'm not sure if you get pushed back like that or anything else, but I am curious what people
00:51:07.240
say. I mean, of course it's going to be pushed back with anything you do, whether it's, you know,
00:51:11.040
prison reform or do start a podcast or shooting video, it'll be pushed back to whatever you,
00:51:16.380
you, you want to do. But if it's something you believe in, you got to go through it no matter
00:51:20.000
what somebody says. So I feel that it's in my heart. I feel God called me to do so.
00:51:24.920
So if somebody got something else to say, not that I, you know, I don't care what they got to think,
00:51:29.740
but I really don't when it comes down to me following what I think I'm here to do by God.
00:51:34.360
And who am I to judge what another man or another human should be doing? That ain't for us to say so.
00:51:41.180
Who am I to say what another human should be doing with their life or they, they right?
00:51:44.820
Like, that ain't like, who the fuck are you? You know, like, honestly, man, like they say only God
00:51:50.600
could judge, but a lot of people really don't even stand by that. And all we do is put a label on
00:51:55.840
somebody, not even knowing the situation or the shit that they had to go through and the reason
00:51:59.360
why they were even there. That's the real bullshit is why was that person even in that situation
00:52:04.540
to even feel the need to commit that crime? Like they're trying to find love in a community where
00:52:10.040
it doesn't exist. That's the real problem is that there's not even an opportunity in some of
00:52:14.480
these communities. There's not even schools. There's not even mentors. It's not even jobs
00:52:18.580
available for them to even become a working citizen of their community. Right? So there's a bigger problem
00:52:24.800
to this shit. You want to nitpick a dude for selling dope. The only opportunity he had to make a
00:52:29.260
fucking dollar was to sell dope. Right? When you're at the, at a bridge point, whereas I sell this
00:52:34.640
fucking weed or I sell whatever it is I got to sell or my kid doesn't eat, what are you going
00:52:40.400
to do? Right. You're going to go sell that weed. You have to because you're fucking using what's
00:52:44.740
in front of you. Could you get up and go move and do all this shit? Yes, you can, but there's so many
00:52:49.120
things that make it hard for a person to do so. So it's lack of opportunity, lack of knowledge,
00:52:55.500
and it's shit that could be fixed through education and things that we're able to preach out and teach
00:52:59.640
to others. But who are you to sit back and say what another person should be doing, man,
00:53:04.320
or what they should be fucking being given in their life? Like some of these guys have committed
00:53:09.060
their crimes, man, at age 14 and 15 and 16 years old. They're kids. Think about your mind at 15
00:53:16.000
and 16. Yeah. Right? Not even the same person. So now here you are as a 45 year old man, you spent
00:53:21.500
30 years locked up and you got to pay for the thing that you did at 14. Now I'm not disregarding
00:53:26.880
any type of, you know, feeling for the victims of these situations and the victims of these crimes,
00:53:31.560
bro. Like there's no, you know, like there's, there's no easy way to move past these things,
00:53:37.180
but you got to forgive to move forward. And we got to understand that these aren't the same people
00:53:42.520
anymore. Like they gone through 30 years of sitting on this crime thinking like, fuck,
00:53:47.580
if I could go back, I would fix it again. But society never gives them a chance to be seen as
00:53:51.840
human again. And that's all they want to be is, is to be seen as human, not to be seen as like
00:53:57.320
anything to be seen as a person. When I first walked into the prison, I was scared. I remember
00:54:02.460
telling Scott, like, man, these guys ain't going to fucking talk to me, man. They go. I don't know
00:54:06.520
what it is I'm walking into. I think I'm, I think I'm walking into beyond scared straight or some
00:54:10.560
shit. I think I'm walking on to like, you know, locked up on A&E or whatever. I think that's what it's
00:54:16.160
going to be like, man, I go in there. I meet some of the nicest and some of the kindest and some of
00:54:21.940
the most interesting and wisdom filled guys I've ever met in my life, like ever. And all they wanted
00:54:29.080
to be, all they wanted was just to be heard and to have a conversation with a human on the outside
00:54:33.640
that will look at them as another human and not a number. They just want to be forgiven and they
00:54:37.940
want to be seen as equal. And it is very hard, you know? And I mean, fuck, I mean, if I get backlash for
00:54:44.440
and I'm sorry, like I'm going to die standing by what I believe in. I think that's, I think that's
00:54:49.160
important when you say, Hey, I don't care what they think, but also the alternative or another
00:54:52.820
perspective is making sure that you're aware of what the pushback is. So you can drive forward
00:54:57.540
with something that's meaningful to you. Right. Yeah. But those are two different things. And I'm not
00:55:01.220
on my, you know, I say that, but I'm not, I'm not even on my platform saying fuck anybody that
00:55:06.720
thinks otherwise, like it's education, bro. If I could change the perspective, I could change the way
00:55:11.100
that we live. Right. If I could, if I could show you through the things I'm doing and I'm willing
00:55:15.500
to take the risk to do so, like maybe I could change that. So if you got something negative to
00:55:20.840
say about me and you just blatantly don't want to hear it. Yeah. Maybe it's fuck you, man. But if you
00:55:25.480
just are confused about it and got a genuine concern, man, like, yo, come have a conversation
00:55:29.440
and let's talk about it because I'm, I want to know where that concern come from. Right. That's why stuff
00:55:33.600
like this is so important. Podcasting, what you're doing in the community, because people aren't
00:55:38.240
having these kinds of conversations and what they're doing is they're seeing one aspect of
00:55:42.340
it and jump into a conclusion about something they know nothing about rather than sitting
00:55:47.120
down and saying, okay, let me ask you some questions about this from a genuine place.
00:55:51.820
Like, man, there's no easy, like I get it, man. Like victims, somebody's crime, like there's
00:55:56.520
no easy way to do so, man. But even through like trauma, like any trauma, like I've gone through
00:56:02.080
extreme trauma, like, you know, close, like life or death situations. And to the people that,
00:56:07.240
that, that, that, that did so to me, I said, I got to forgive them because that's the only
00:56:10.740
way I'm able to allow myself to heal. And I get it, man. Some shit's hard and I can't
00:56:17.120
be, I can't sit here and tell another person they have to do this. But for my experience
00:56:21.860
and me almost losing my life in certain situations, the people that have hurt me to do so, I forgive
00:56:28.420
them still. Man, that takes a lot because this shit fucking, this shit haunted me for years
00:56:33.220
through what I've been through, but I forgive the person. And more so, like I look at why was that
00:56:38.440
person in that situation in the first place to even feel that they had to hurt me in that way to
00:56:41.960
get what they wanted. And I look at the bigger picture of how can we change this shit, man? So
00:56:47.520
no other kid feels like the only way they could eat and survive is to, to, to hurt, to kill, to rob,
00:56:54.120
to steal, to do so. Like, what do we got to do? So, you know, for me, forgiving people allow me to
00:57:00.140
heal, man. And really come to peace with some of the traumas that I've been able to go through.
00:57:04.440
Have you, uh, have you taken people through and, and, uh, the process yet where they've got their
00:57:09.540
license and they're out practicing? Not currently. We're in the building phase right now where we're
00:57:14.740
building out the, the, um, the space. In the, in the prison itself or is it outside of the prison?
00:57:20.020
In the prison itself. So we're building right now, designing and it's, it's a process, you know,
00:57:24.460
working with the government and doing anything. Of course.
00:57:26.460
The red tape. It's just going to take some time. Uh, we should be looking at towards the end of
00:57:30.680
this year for the first one to be launching up and running. But I mean, the hardest thing was just
00:57:34.000
getting the concept of even be approved. Like that was a battle.
00:57:36.860
Yeah. What was that like? I mean, obviously tons of committees you have to deal with and
00:57:40.140
everything else. You know, thank God I got a guy like Scott to really push forward for these things
00:57:44.660
because he's a guy that's had 20 plus years of experience and relationships to make it go so
00:57:51.140
smoothly. Right. If it was both of us stepping in from day one of an idea, it might've
00:57:56.380
took a while, but Scott is a guy that did 20 years to build up to, to be able to have
00:58:00.540
and do so for things like this. So, you know, all shout out to Scott really like, I mean,
00:58:05.940
I got to get, I got all the credit because he's gone through the hardest of the hardest
00:58:10.400
things just to be able to have a voice in, in a scenario like this and in these rooms
00:58:14.280
and in these circles. So, uh, because of him, we're able to push forward a little bit
00:58:18.340
faster than others. But for me, it was, you know, different because I've never, I'm not
00:58:22.880
into politics like that, man, but like I've had to speak to people that look nothing like
00:58:29.200
us or understand the world that we come from, but they're in charge of some of the most critical
00:58:34.820
decisions on, on how people of our communities need to be living. And the, the, the, the level
00:58:40.800
of like, like I said, um, like the livelihood of like what they live every day, like the quality
00:58:46.260
of life that they'll be given are controlled by people that just really disconnected. So it was
00:58:50.900
my first time really sitting in a, in a conversation and in a call with these people.
00:58:55.540
And again, it's not, Oh fuck you if you don't understand, but how do I change your perspective
00:59:00.060
and allow you to, to see it from what we've been through and how do I allow us to, to get
00:59:04.580
what we, to get where we need to be going. So that was different for me having to sit down
00:59:09.640
and look at my room and assess and, and learn about how I'm going to communicate and get
00:59:13.940
this message across in the most, you know, like understanding way. Right. Like that was,
00:59:18.240
that was, it was a good time. Yeah. But there was a lot of,
00:59:20.600
I bet that was a pretty big challenge. I mean, yeah, it's just more so like communication
00:59:25.580
and learning that and, and learning that some people are not going to look how we look,
00:59:30.460
not going to sound the way that we look, but you know, the power to be able to speak
00:59:33.720
to anybody is very, very important, but more so the power to make everybody understand your
00:59:38.500
vision and understand your ideas. Right. We all got a lot of ideas, but if we could communicate
00:59:43.920
to everybody, our ideas and allow them to see them the way that we see them, our shit will
00:59:48.220
be moving forward. Right. Yeah. For you to pitch things, for you to get shit done. It's all about,
00:59:52.480
you know, telling your idea and making it easily to understand.
00:59:56.640
Have you, have you always been somebody that's good, that can do that? Because like, I'm sitting
01:00:00.040
here listening to you and, and I, and I've seen you from, from a distance on social media
01:00:04.000
and clearly you have the ability to communicate an important message. Clearly it's important to you.
01:00:09.040
Is this something you've always been able to do and it's part of your, your personality?
01:00:12.960
Yeah. I feel like I've, you know, I feel like God bless my voice before you bless my hands. Like
01:00:16.360
I've always loved to speak that I know I could like to get to this point to speak now. Like
01:00:21.460
of course it's, it's took, it's taken some work. It's not, I'm not going to say in front
01:00:25.440
like, Oh, I'm just naturally like this. Like I work in my speaking, man. I've took in, you
01:00:30.120
know, speaking classes. I've learned, I've watched videos. I've studied the craft of speaking
01:00:34.860
and how to use my voice. Cause that's my gift, man. And you know, hard work, be talented
01:00:39.200
with talent or work hard. And if I got a little bit of talent and a little bit of hard work,
01:00:43.620
like I'm trying to just keep it going and keep it pushing forward. So it's something
01:00:47.000
that I work on for sure. And, you know, my best friend will probably give you a better
01:00:50.920
answer. Cause he here, like I've, I've, I would say I spoke well, but he might know better
01:00:56.220
cause I never really think about it like that. Um, what do you think?
01:01:03.700
Yeah. I mean, it's really key to emotion. I think about emotion and like, how, how do
01:01:20.620
I like, how would this make this person feel if I say something like this? And it's not
01:01:24.560
really what you say is how you say things, man. And you really got to know how to get
01:01:29.620
a message to somebody without them feeling offended, without them feeling pushed. And
01:01:32.540
I just know how I would, you know, put myself in them shoes, man. If I say just like this
01:01:36.140
to that person, you know, how are they going to feel? And then I always think about the
01:01:40.180
intent that people have, uh, versus, you know, their actions. And sometimes people got great
01:01:45.740
intent for the things they want to do and they do the wrong action or they do it in a
01:01:49.220
way that gives a different, you know, image of what they were intending to do. So, so I
01:01:53.260
assess that, right? Like what was this person's intent with what they wanted to do and how
01:01:57.760
am I going to respond to them versus what they actually do. And as long as you can see
01:02:02.020
somebody is intense in what they did to you, like if it's genuine, then you got to make
01:02:07.000
sure your response to them is going to make them understand. So, yeah. Right. You know,
01:02:11.160
that's a good point. I think that's one of the things that's a real problem in society
01:02:14.620
is people don't look at intent. And I've just come to the conclusion that most people just
01:02:18.540
don't communicate real well. And so they, they probably have better intent more often than
01:02:24.340
their ability to communicate it and relay it effectively. Yeah. So I think we need
01:02:28.240
to afford people grace when they say something dumb or do something dumb and realize that
01:02:33.920
maybe there was a good intention behind it. Maybe the intention was in it. The intention
01:02:37.020
was there, man. Like, yo, you just got to communicate. Say like, yo, I see what you were
01:02:40.480
doing, man. But, uh, it made me feel this way when you did. So, um, I appreciate that if
01:02:45.260
you want to do it differently next time, this is a way that I would appreciate you to say
01:02:48.500
or do so, you know, and you just got to communicate in a better way. But that's what I think
01:02:53.640
about a lot when I speak to people, even as I'm interviewing or cutting people on the streets,
01:02:57.840
like, you know, how do I communicate to this person? Everybody's different. So that's the
01:03:02.080
challenge with it is that sometimes I'm speaking to a 10 year old kid and sometimes I'm speaking
01:03:06.340
to a 60 year old man. Like, yeah, you got to learn how to communicate your ideas and your
01:03:12.000
thoughts to different people for allowing them to feel comfortable. Yeah. Well, what's next for you?
01:03:16.060
I mean, obviously you've got the barbershop within the prison system. You've got your own
01:03:20.560
personal brand and what you're doing. Anything else coming down the line? I mean, tons of things
01:03:24.840
that can't speak of currently yet. A lot of things in the pipeline that have hangover, right? The next
01:03:30.220
hangover. They say, yes, Scott, when you see this, make sure, make sure I'm on the list, man. So
01:03:35.080
that's right. Um, a lot of dope things. All I can say is that I'm looking to elevate my voice
01:03:40.280
and really become an inspiration to young kids and not just young kids, but anybody out there that
01:03:44.740
has a dream that they want to chase. And you want to take my voice to the highest level possible.
01:03:48.700
So that's all I hope to do in the next couple of years. Um, you know, when people ask me where I
01:03:53.580
see myself and, and, and stuff like that, like, I just want to continue to inspire, bro. And whatever
01:03:59.340
guy got planning for that, whatever platform I'm going to be on, whatever channel he wants me on,
01:04:03.440
that's where I'll be at. And, um, I just, a lot of dope shit coming, man. A lot of really dope
01:04:08.460
things. I'm excited for you. I've been looking forward to having this conversation. I was, it was
01:04:12.000
funny. I was telling Brandy and I were talking cause she helped get this set up for us. I think you
01:04:15.940
talk to her via email. And, uh, she, she wanted me to tell you to remind or remind me about this
01:04:22.400
story is that this was months and months ago. She's like, Hey, check this guy out. He'd be good
01:04:27.440
on the podcast. And I'm like, Oh yeah, cool. I'll take a look. And I kind of blew it off.
01:04:31.840
And then about three or four months later, I had followed you. And I was looking at, I'm like,
01:04:36.760
man, I love this guy's stuff. So I sent Brandy a message. I'm like, Hey, this guy would be awesome
01:04:40.460
on the podcast. She's like, I told you that three months ago. So she wanted to make sure I said that it
01:04:45.060
was, uh, it was her, indeed her idea, even though I stole credit, uh, man, shout out to Brandy for
01:04:50.360
seeing it, man. But yo, I appreciate it. Like, and that too, man, like, I don't care if you became
01:04:55.580
a fan or a supporter of something that we did. I did yesterday. As long as you're here and you see
01:05:01.940
the, you see the vision and you support it. Like, I appreciate that. I'm not a dude that's like,
01:05:06.260
Oh, if you ain't fucking me back then, you can't fuck me now, man. Like any support is,
01:05:10.620
is appreciate. I love everybody that is, you know, that can see what I'm trying to do, man.
01:05:15.220
Yeah. I appreciate you. Well, you have my support. I mean, like I said, I've been inspired. I love
01:05:19.240
this conversation. I think what you're doing is amazing. And so you have my support,
01:05:22.660
whatever I can do to help. I'm on it, man. Thank you, bro. Likewise, man. Thanks, brother.
01:05:28.060
All right, gentlemen, there you go. My conversation with the one and only Vic blends,
01:05:32.500
man. Whoa. What an incredible conversation. You heard it. I don't, I don't need to tell you.
01:05:39.000
I think the guy is awesome. The guy is solid. The guy's doing everything that we have been talking
01:05:45.220
about for seven years. So connect with Vic on the socials, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, Twitter,
01:05:51.660
blah, blah, blah, all the places and see what this guy is up to because he is, he is embodying what we
01:05:59.280
talk about. And by being able to sit down with him for an hour, hour and a half, couple hours in
01:06:04.880
Atlanta, a couple of weeks ago, I'm just telling you, I'm walking away a better man from that
01:06:09.960
conversation. I hope you are as well with that guys, make sure you connect with him. Make sure
01:06:14.960
you check out our man and caged event, man on cage.com slash live man, uncaged.com slash live
01:06:21.680
and get registered. I hope to see you in May on the 7th. But outside of that, let's go out there.
01:06:28.820
Let's take action and let's become a man. We are meant to be.
01:06:32.380
Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your
01:06:36.660
life and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.