What Kind of Man Do You Need to Become? | FRIDAY FIELD NOTES
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
193.1514
Summary
Too many men fail because they don't have a clear vision of what they want out of life. In order to achieve greatness, you need to know who you are and what you want to become so that you can be the best version of yourself.
Transcript
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you have to ask yourself, I'm not there yet, so why?
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Well, you're not there because you're not being
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Embrace your fears and boldly chart your own path
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This is who you will become at the end of the day.
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You wouldn't be here on this path of self-development
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if you didn't have some greater vision for who you are.
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But often, we as men get hung up along the way.
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And there's all sorts of problems that come with our natural tendency to be our own worst enemy.
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And I've got a very simple message for you today.
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And this one's going to be probably shorter than my other podcast,
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but it's very important that we wrap our heads around the concept that I'm going to share with you today.
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one simple question that you can ask yourself that will get you on the right path.
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and they let other people stumble them up and trip them up.
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And the question is very simply this, without further ado,
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Who do I need to become to have that kind of business?
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Who do I need to become to be that type of father?
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Who do I need to become to connect with my wife?
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Who do I need to become to have that physique or have my debt paid off
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or have a bunch of money in the bank or go on those vacations or enjoy this type of lifestyle?
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In order to answer that question, you have to have some vision of who you want to be.
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And it is amazing and disturbing how many men I talk with every single day
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who have no vision about what they want out of life.
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They'll say something like, I don't know, good relationship with my wife,
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maybe a little money in the bank account and just kind of a good life.
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Well, welcome to the club, but that's not real compelling.
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So does that mean if you make a dollar more today than you did yesterday,
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very, very specific, very, very exact on what you want,
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you're never going to achieve any measure of greatness.
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But from there, once you have that vision, you have to ask yourself,
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Well, you're not there because you're not being the kind of man
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who is qualified to have the result that you desire.
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Too many men think that they can have the result without the effort.
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You know, you look around at people that you're motivated and inspired by,
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But what too many men fail to do is to bridge the gap between where that man is
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And it's always, always a bad idea to attribute success at any level to luck,
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Because I'm not going to lie and tell you that there isn't lucky circumstances.
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There isn't being at the right place at the right time
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or having some favorable or fortunate events happen to you.
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But you could actually create that by being the kind of man that you need to be
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When you attribute another man's success to luck,
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what you simultaneously do is say to yourself, even subconsciously,
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I won't have the success and the results that I want in my life until I get lucky.
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If you look at the 500 plus men I've had on the podcast,
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and they're all successful in their own right, it's not luck.
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It's a series of deliberate and clear actions that have got them to exactly where they are.
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And even if they had got lucky at some point in their life,
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it would not be sustainable if that's all they were relying upon.
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No, guys, it takes clear, deliberate action and a future vision for who you are and who you want to be.
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It's the gap between where you are right now and where you see yourself being.
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The further that gap is, and also the less work that you're doing to bridge that gap,
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the more uncomfortable you'll feel about yourself and your performance.
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I'm not here to tell you that in order to be confident and sure of yourself,
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You don't, but you do have to be bridging that gap.
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You do have to be laying the foundation of that road that you're going to be able to walk
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that's going to get you from point A to point B.
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But again, to go back to my question and the premise of this podcast,
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I'm often met with guys who will excuse away their performance and say,
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You know, a prime example of that might be somebody who wants to run a marathon,
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for example, and they'll say, well, I'm not a runner.
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Well, if you tell yourself you're not a runner, then that's accurate.
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Or other men decide, you know, man, I'd really like to write a book,
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Well, you're not a great writer because you're not writing.
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Take the most successful men in any field and take a look at what they do.
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We're on the back of the Olympics, and I know there was a lot of controversy
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and even some vocal criticism coming from me as well regarding the Olympics,
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but there's no doubt that those Olympians have worked very, very hard
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with the exception of maybe one certain breakdancer,
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but the rest had worked very, very hard to get them to the place that they were.
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They were actually doing the work required to achieve those results.
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The ones who are good, they practice and they breakdance.
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A lot of guys will say, oh, man, that guy's so successful at hunting.
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That guy runs a crazy amount of miles every single day,
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But be honest, at least, about your lack of ability or desire to do it.
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I fell into this trap years ago where I would compare myself
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to other notable podcasters, namely guys like Joe Rogan.
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But then I actually started to look into what Joe Rogan did on a daily basis
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and how he traveled and how much he was communicating
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and how many podcasts he's done over the years that he's been doing it now.
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but I'm not willing to invest to the same degree.
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It just means it doesn't align with what I want to create for my life.
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So when it comes to determining the kind of man you want to be,
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And I want you to get a notepad out or your phone out
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and I want you to ask yourself these questions.
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What does the man I want to be do on a daily basis?
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What does the man I want to be do on a daily basis?
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what is he doing at the end of his day to cap it off?
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And then that time between what he's doing for work
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I think it was either last week or the week before
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So you need to determine where that is unhealthy.
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what are the guys doing that I want to be like?
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Because there's vices that you're familiar with,
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or procrastination or name your vice of choice,
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or some character you have made up in your mind,
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with the bracelets that had the letters WWJD on them.
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If he had to interact with people he didn't like
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If there was a principle that was being jeopardized
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or you were being asked to go against your morals and values,
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So not only what would the man that I want to be do,
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but also what would the man I want to be not do?
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He wouldn't get sedated with drugs and alcohol.
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He would go all in on the thing that was important to him.
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that you need to identify why that's important to you.
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He's significantly better, of course, than I am
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I don't think he just kind of waffles to and fro
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when he lets other people dictate the tone of his life.
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What is it that these people you want to be like do?
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And when you figure out why it's important to you
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you don't feel like being the man you need to be,
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Like there's times I just don't want to do that,
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well, how's that going to help me show up as a man?
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So I think that's a very important question, guys.
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this one's going to be a short one for you today.
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and you know why you're putting forth that effort.
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You would achieve more results and success in your life
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And we do have a responsibility to them as well.