Order of Man - December 29, 2023


When Discipline Falls Flat | FRIDAY FIELD NOTES


Episode Stats


Length

21 minutes

Words per minute

202.31079

Word count

4,360

Sentence count

300

Harmful content

Misogyny

1

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, Ryan talks about when discipline falls flat and gives 5 questions to ask yourself that will help you get back on the path. The other resource, The Iron Council, is open for reservations until the 7th of January.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart
00:00:04.980 your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.
00:00:10.460 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong. This is your life. This is who
00:00:17.200 you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,
00:00:22.780 you can call yourself a man. Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Mickler.
00:00:27.460 I'm your host and the founder of the Order of Man podcast and movement. Welcome here today.
00:00:32.520 We're in the midst of the holiday season. Christmas was last week. And of course,
00:00:37.000 we've got New Year's coming up on Monday. And I know a lot of people are thinking about what
00:00:40.800 they want to accomplish as they roll into 2024. I've got a couple of resources for you today that
00:00:45.460 I think and I hope will help you. Number one is this podcast. Today, we're going to be talking about
00:00:50.240 when discipline falls flat. And specifically, what I'm going to address is five questions that you
00:00:55.760 can ask yourself that will help you get back on the path. I know it might be a little premature
00:01:00.340 to start talking about discipline falling flat considering we're not even into the new year.
00:01:05.700 Most people last two, three, four weeks. And so you're probably all excited and the willpower is
00:01:11.220 there and you've got your why and a strong reason for doing what you're doing and how you're going
00:01:15.960 to improve. But I'm going to share with you preemptively how you can make sure that you
00:01:19.740 sustain the momentum. We'll get into that in just a second. The other resource that I want to share
00:01:24.580 with you is our exclusive brotherhood, the Iron Council. Now it is open. Usually we close it
00:01:29.740 at the end of the year. This year, I decided to leave it open until the 7th of January. So if you're
00:01:37.640 coming to the game a little bit late or just hearing about the podcast, or you've been on the fence about
00:01:41.660 joining the Iron Council, you have until January 7th to do it. And specifically, I've got a really,
00:01:48.120 really good free resource for you. We're going to be giving you a preview, a little peek behind the
00:01:53.400 curtain into what we do inside of our exclusive brotherhood that we've been going with for eight
00:01:57.800 years now. And you're going to be able to check that out on Thursday night of next week. So that's
00:02:03.100 Thursday, January 4th. Thursday, January 4th at 8 o'clock Eastern PM. 8 o'clock PM Eastern time.
00:02:10.960 We're going to be giving you a little peek. You're going to be able to ask questions. You're going to
00:02:14.820 be able to see the framework that we use, the network that we have, the tools, the resources,
00:02:19.320 everything that's available in the Iron Council. And all you have to do is go to theironcouncil.com
00:02:25.180 slash preview, theironcouncil.com slash preview. And you'll be able to get a little peek behind the
00:02:32.440 curtain into what we do. Again, that's going to be Thursday, the 4th at 8 o'clock PM Eastern
00:02:36.300 at theironcouncil.com slash preview. I hope to see you there. All right, guys, let's talk about
00:02:43.220 when discipline falls flat. Now, look, we've all heard discipline equals freedom and you just have
00:02:50.020 to do it and power through it and just make it happen. And I believe that there's validity to
00:02:55.480 that. I believe that it's important that we set our minds to accomplish something and we do whatever
00:03:00.980 it takes for however long it takes to accomplish that desire, that goal, that objective. But the
00:03:08.200 reality and studies and research suggest that our willpower is fleeting, that even though we have the
00:03:14.200 best of intentions, we have things we want to accomplish, we have systems in place, we have
00:03:18.660 all the willpower in the world, we're ready to go and we're excited about our why as to what we're
00:03:22.500 doing. Even then, life gets in the way, you get tired, things come up, we deal with unfortunate
00:03:29.800 circumstances, we get busy with other things, or simply we just fall back into old patterns and
00:03:35.880 habits. You don't want that to happen. I don't want that to happen. So when discipline does fall
00:03:40.840 short, and it does, and it has for you, I'm sure as it has for me, what then do you do? This podcast
00:03:46.460 today is not about me giving you all the answers, but I want to give you a couple of questions that I
00:03:51.880 have asked myself that have helped me get back on the path when everything else seems to be falling
00:03:57.920 apart or not working the way that I had hoped. So the first question is, what is your plan?
00:04:03.420 If you notice that you are falling behind on accomplishing your gym objectives in your fitness
00:04:09.840 and health, or your business goals, whatever it may be, then you have to ask yourself,
00:04:15.820 why or what is it the plan that I have in place? Most people don't have a plan. When it comes to New
00:04:21.100 Year's resolutions, they say to themselves, you know, I just want to lose weight. That's not a plan.
00:04:26.820 That might be a goal. It's not a great goal because it's not real specific, like a smart goal,
00:04:31.740 if you will, but it's not even a plan. Well, I want to make more money this year. Again,
00:04:37.320 an objective, something you want to do, but how in the world are you going to accomplish that?
00:04:41.740 It would be like going to coach an NFL football team. And when they're going to hire you,
00:04:47.720 or you're talking to the press about what your plan is for this coming week or the season,
00:04:52.120 you saying, we're going to win. Okay. How are you going to do that? I don't know. We're going to
00:04:56.380 figure it out along the way. Guys, it doesn't work. So you have to have a plan in place to
00:05:01.520 ensure that it happens. And the more specific you can be with regards to your plan, the better off
00:05:06.320 you're going to be. Now, a lot of the times I've talked with men who won't actually design,
00:05:12.920 let alone implement a plan because they're worried that it won't work anyways. And I've got news for
00:05:16.920 you. It probably won't. The plan that you craft, even if it's the perfectly crafted,
00:05:22.880 beautiful document or Excel worksheet or whatever planning tool you're using out there, it's not
00:05:31.740 going to work the way that you want. Just recognize that now and don't pigeonhole yourself into the
00:05:37.160 plan, but use it as a compass to help you get to where you want to go. Things are inevitably going
00:05:42.340 to come up. You're going to get busy. You're going to get distracted. Your priorities are going to
00:05:46.760 change. External circumstances might be thrust upon you that you're not able currently to deal with.
00:05:52.280 Things are going to happen, but that doesn't mean that you can't change your plan down the road.
00:05:57.240 You can. All that I want you to do is come up with a plan with the information that you have
00:06:01.940 at your disposal right now. I don't know what's going to happen this afternoon. I don't know what's
00:06:07.480 going to happen in a week. I don't know what's going to happen in two years, but I can make a plan,
00:06:11.240 not on that, but what I'm dealing with right now. I talked with a friend who's currently going
00:06:17.800 through, it looks like a separation and a divorce. And up until this point, he's played defense
00:06:22.900 because he's making his decisions based on what might happen in the future. And I know there needs
00:06:27.620 to be some projecting. You need to prepare yourself, especially in these circumstances for
00:06:32.100 what might happen. Sure, do that. But playing defense isn't going to help you accomplish your
00:06:37.500 goals, objectives, and make you feel good about yourself. You need to be preemptive. You need to go on
00:06:42.440 the offense, which means control the controllables, identify what those things are, and then make a
00:06:48.300 plan to ensure that you're going to go to the gym, or you're going to make the sales call, or you're
00:06:53.120 going to court your wife again, or you're going to name whatever it is that you want to do in order
00:07:00.040 to accomplish those goals. Have a plan. If you're interested in what that might look like, you can go
00:07:04.660 check out our battle planner at order of man.com slash battle planner, or 12, the number 12,
00:07:11.460 12weekbattleplanner.com will let you have access to the app that's available to draft out and map
00:07:18.340 out your plan. All right. So number two, now that you have a plan in place, I'm going to go to the
00:07:23.480 gym every single morning, Monday through Friday at 6 a.m. And I'm going to do this workout on Monday,
00:07:30.620 this workout on Tuesday, this workout on Wednesday, this workout on Thursday, this workout on Friday.
00:07:34.660 And it's going to take me an hour. I'm going to have my pre-workout ready to go. I'm going to have a
00:07:39.560 post-workout, or I'm going to drink enough water. I'm going to have my gym clothes laid out. I'm
00:07:43.120 going to hire this trainer. I'm going to hire this nutritionist, whatever it might be having that plan
00:07:47.360 in place. Now, what you have to do is if you're falling behind, you have to ask yourself, where
00:07:51.720 did it fail? Where did that plan fail? Let me give you an example. I have a goal to go into the gym
00:07:57.520 every single morning. So the other day I went to the gym, as I always do. I woke up at 530,
00:08:03.900 I got ready. I got my pre-workout ready. And I went to the gym. I got to the gym, started to walk
00:08:11.200 to the door, realized I didn't have my key fob with me to get into the gym. So it didn't work.
00:08:17.600 Okay. The plan failed. I still had the plan in place, but it didn't work properly because I had
00:08:22.200 failed in a component of that plan. In this case, I had left the key fob in the other vehicle. So I went
00:08:27.860 back, grabbed the key fob out of the other vehicle, went back to the gym, and I got about half the
00:08:33.240 workout in that I normally do because of time constraints. Now, did it work perfectly? No.
00:08:37.460 Did I still get it done? Yes. But where did it fail? In that case, I didn't have the key fob.
00:08:41.860 So what can I do to ensure that that doesn't happen again? Well, make that part of the ritual
00:08:48.180 or the checklist. Just like a pilot would have a checklist, a pre-flight checklist before he flies,
00:08:54.180 I should have a pre-checklist before I go to the gym. Is my drink ready? Are my clothes laid out?
00:09:01.020 Do I know the workout? And do I have my key fob? Okay. That's a simple fix, but I had the plan,
00:09:07.180 realized where it broke down because I was willing to analyze it and then corrected it so that I can
00:09:11.780 move forward. And that's a simple example, but there might be something as maybe even serious as
00:09:17.960 the breakdown of your long-term relationship or even your marriage. So the question is, did you have a
00:09:23.500 plan? Most of us don't. I didn't have a plan. And that's part of the reason that the marriage
00:09:29.180 didn't work is that I set things on cruise control, autopilot. And because I did, I didn't
00:09:35.320 know. I didn't recognize when things were falling apart. I should have. I could have. I'm not denying
00:09:39.680 that. But I didn't know because the plan wasn't in place and I really didn't have any way of reviewing
00:09:44.680 what was breaking down. But had I had a plan to show her how much I appreciate her or continue to
00:09:51.140 court her or any number of things to improve the relationship, open communication and dialogue,
00:09:56.400 conflict resolution, all the things that we talk about, then I could point to something and say,
00:10:01.040 well, we don't communicate real well. So what can we do? I can address that assertively with her.
00:10:06.040 We could potentially go to counseling. We could look at an online course or program available for
00:10:09.980 communication. But the point is, if I have a plan in the relationship, just like you should,
00:10:16.160 then you can point to what's going wrong and work on it. It's the same thing in business.
00:10:19.560 If you're down 25% in revenue this month, but you had a plan for that revenue, you can go back and
00:10:26.320 you can actually look at the numbers and see, okay, well, we're up in sales here, but we were
00:10:30.180 significantly down in sales here. Why? Well, maybe you forgot to send an email. Maybe you were in the
00:10:35.860 middle of hiring a new key player for your team. Well, at least now you know, and you can ask yourself,
00:10:42.120 why did this fail? And then most importantly, what do I need to do to improve it?
00:10:46.740 All right. Number three. So we have, what is your plan? Where did it fail? Number three,
00:10:52.700 what are your resources? Okay. When it comes to improving in your life, you need new stimulus,
00:10:59.780 new information, new resources, new training and education in your mind so that you can overcome
00:11:05.840 something that you have not previously overcome. If it's relational issues, hiring a coach or a
00:11:12.200 therapist or going to a course would help you gain new insight and education into how to improve that
00:11:19.360 marriage. If it's business and you don't know how to market properly, well, a resource that you need
00:11:25.440 to bring in is either a marketing team or go to a marketing conference or watch some YouTube videos
00:11:30.740 or listen to a podcast or hire a coach. I may have said that there's all sorts of resources that you
00:11:37.700 need available. If you're trying to improve your fitness and you notice that you're doing really,
00:11:42.680 really well for a week or two or three weeks, and then you fall off the wagon because you don't know
00:11:47.540 what to do. Okay. Well, you had a plan. It wasn't very good because you don't know what to do.
00:11:51.480 You know why you failed because you were bored and you weren't being,
00:11:54.740 you weren't properly going through the motions to improve your performance.
00:11:58.180 And number three, what are your resources? Well, in that case, you might need to hire a nutritionist
00:12:02.500 because you're not doing it on your own, or you might need to hire a trainer to actually program
00:12:08.860 workouts for you. Now, inevitably, when I talk about this, people are like, well, that'd be,
00:12:13.520 that's easy for you to say. It's expensive and I don't have any money. Guys, you can jump on
00:12:17.360 online and find free workout programs by just typing in Google free workout programs for
00:12:24.520 losing fat or building muscle or improving my deadlift or for running a marathon.
00:12:30.940 Please don't ever use the excuse that you don't have any money. Now, in a lot of instances,
00:12:35.740 you get what you pay for. And should you work to improve your financial acumen and standing so that
00:12:41.200 you can hire the best? Sure. But in the meantime, you can do something about it where you currently are
00:12:47.940 until you get to that point. And by the way, the only way you get to that point
00:12:51.780 is by starting to improve your current situation. So what are the resources that are at your disposal
00:12:58.360 and what resources do you need? Another great resource that many men don't tap into is having
00:13:03.980 a band of brothers, having people they can rely on, having people who are successful in their family
00:13:09.400 dynamic or their business dynamic, or with regards to their health that are going to help keep you in
00:13:14.040 check and give you tools and systems and resources that you need to thrive. Or calling your brother
00:13:20.340 or your uncle or your father or a neighbor or whoever you consult with and whoever's advocating
00:13:26.180 for you and you're advocating for them, an accountability partner almost. If you need
00:13:30.660 something, this is why we created the Iron Council. That again is our exclusive brotherhood. We're going
00:13:36.040 to do that preview next week on Thursday. It's January 4th, 8 p.m. Eastern on Thursday of next week.
00:13:42.920 And if you want to check it out and how that might serve you with regards to who you need in your
00:13:47.340 corner, other men, then you can go to theironcouncil.com slash preview, theironcouncil.com
00:13:53.500 slash preview, and you'll be able to check it out on Thursday at 8 p.m. on the 4th. So who are your
00:13:59.880 resources? Who is currently in your corner that you're not using? Who do you need to bring into your
00:14:04.800 corner and onto your team so that you can improve your situation? Number four, what information do you
00:14:11.200 not have? Again, I already alluded to this. If you're failing at the gym because you don't have
00:14:17.880 a workout program, then you're missing a crucial key component. You can go up and show up to the gym
00:14:24.420 and go do some bench and go do some curls and go do some skull crushers. Maybe do a little shoulder 0.99
00:14:30.880 work and do a few pull-ups and do some abs. You could definitely do that. And will you see results?
00:14:37.500 Yeah, if you do that enough, you'll probably see some results depending on where you are on your
00:14:41.640 fitness journey currently, but it's not as good as it could be. If you want to build a six-pack,
00:14:48.060 then you can go wing it or you can get new information. It's all free. It's all there.
00:14:54.160 It's all available. If you want to improve your marriage, it's all there. It's all free. It's all
00:14:58.200 available. If you want to grow your business, it's all free. It's all there. It's all available.
00:15:01.440 Too often, we have these goals that we want to accomplish and we're aiming at the wrong target.
00:15:07.500 We think that we need to be doing sales development or client retention or gaining
00:15:13.500 new sales. When in all reality, it could be just learning how to market better or learning how to
00:15:17.820 close better or learning the art of following up or how to present yourself in a more professional
00:15:25.320 manner. There's information that you're missing. If you have a coach, he's going to help you identify
00:15:30.400 what that is. If, for example, you're going to the gym and you're busting your butt at the gym,
00:15:36.460 but your nutrition's all out of whack, it doesn't really matter how much you're doing
00:15:40.660 at the gym. If your nutrition is garbage, you're probably not going to experience the results that
00:15:44.820 you need. Do you go to the gym more? No. The information you need is how to plan your meals,
00:15:52.340 meal prep, what kind of foods, what kind of proportions, what do you need to eat and how
00:15:56.620 much of it and when. That's the information you need. Find the right information. It's there and it's
00:16:01.940 available. And if you don't want it, you'll make an excuse. And that's how you know you don't want
00:16:06.460 it. You can say whatever you want to say, but if you make excuses for what you know you should be
00:16:11.560 doing, then you just don't want it bad enough. And that might be okay, but don't deceive yourself
00:16:16.820 and tell yourself that you want something without a willingness to go out there, find the information
00:16:21.980 and resources that you need, plug them into the right places, and then go on about what you want to
00:16:27.200 accomplish. Guys, number five, and I think this is the most important thing. There's a lot of
00:16:32.280 research on this. There's two great books. One is called The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg.
00:16:36.620 The other one is called Atomic Habits by James Clear. And James Clear says, and I'm paraphrasing,
00:16:41.380 we don't rise to our discipline. We fall to our systems. I totally butchered that, but I think and
00:16:49.400 hope you get the point. Just because we're disciplined or committed doesn't mean we're going to
00:16:53.460 accomplish a goal. We are going to fall. Our best performance is only as good as the systems that we
00:17:00.540 have in place. That's probably a better way to say it. Much more eloquent. Our performance is only as
00:17:07.500 good as the systems that we have in place. So what is your system? Do you have a checklist? I have mine
00:17:14.500 right here. I know what I'm going to do every single day. I write it down. I check it off. I reference
00:17:21.600 it often every single day. At the end of the day, I look back and ask myself, what did I get done?
00:17:26.420 What didn't I get done? What am I going to do tomorrow? Where am I going to plug it in? In
00:17:30.560 what order? When I go to the gym, what is my program? What is my training schedule? Who's
00:17:35.640 helping me? What am I going to be eating this week? I have all my meals delivered. So I know exactly what
00:17:40.380 I'm going to be eating. When do I have my children with me? When are they with their mother? What am I
00:17:45.600 going to talk about with the podcast? I've got tons of podcast ideas here on my phone. Guys, I have a system
00:17:50.800 for everything. I have calendars. I have notepads. I have planners. I have task lists on my phone.
00:17:59.700 Systems for everything. Your performance is only as good as the systems that you have in place.
00:18:06.380 And if you're noticing things fall through the cracks, you're not compelled or motivated to do
00:18:11.280 something. You're not performing in an aspect that you wish you would be or that you have in the past.
00:18:16.880 You have something skewed about your system. So you have the plan and then you have the system in
00:18:23.300 order to implement the plan. So if we go back to that football analogy, saying you want to win games
00:18:27.920 is not enough. Having a plan, hey, we're going to be a heavy passing team and we're going to beat them
00:18:34.560 in the air or we're going to beat them on the run or we're going to have the fastest, most agile
00:18:38.940 defense. We've got a solid offense, but we're really going to make sure this defense is exactly where it
00:18:43.400 needs to be. So other teams can't score against us. Like those are the plans. And then the system
00:18:48.540 is, so we're going to train three, four hours every single day. On Mondays, we train this. On Tuesdays,
00:18:55.100 we train that. On Wednesdays, we train this. Here's our training facilities. Here's what we need in our
00:19:00.500 training facilities. Here's what we already have. These are all the tools and systems in place in order
00:19:05.040 to help you accomplish your goals. Now, as I say this, I understand that this is a 25 minute
00:19:10.840 podcast. And I understand also, if you haven't really done much of this planning in your life,
00:19:15.600 this can seem like a daunting task. And I don't think that you need to do it all at once,
00:19:20.560 but these are the five key questions you need to ask yourself so that you can improve.
00:19:24.500 The challenge is, like I said, you don't have all the resources at your disposal. Now you could go out
00:19:29.980 and do it on your own. And if you can, and you feel like you just need to implement
00:19:33.100 certain elements of what I talked about today, then by all means, go out and implement it.
00:19:37.360 But if you want something a little bit more, that's where the Iron Council would come in.
00:19:41.280 And we're going to help you accomplish these. This might seem like a sales pitch. In a way,
00:19:45.580 I want to be able to provide resources to you. But that said, you can go out and do it on your own.
00:19:51.800 I don't recommend it. I don't advocate for that. I don't even do that myself. I have coaches.
00:19:57.560 I have mentors. I have programs and systems that I belong to, people that I report to,
00:20:03.180 other men that I have conversations with so I can stay on task. If you're looking for the same
00:20:07.520 thing, make sure you check out the Iron Council at theironcouncil.com. Or if you want a sneak
00:20:15.040 peek and a behind the scenes look at what we're doing inside of our brotherhood, then you can go
00:20:19.140 on Thursday, the 4th at 8 p.m. Eastern to theironcouncil.com slash preview.
00:20:25.280 Theironcouncil.com slash preview. Guys, if you have any questions for me, thoughts, concerns,
00:20:32.360 considerations, future topics, whatever it might be, please connect with me on Instagram
00:20:37.680 at Ryan Michler, on X at Ryan Michler, on YouTube at Order of Man, or even email me if you have
00:20:44.200 questions about what we're doing here or our brotherhood, the Iron Council at Ryan at order
00:20:49.140 of man.com. All right, guys, I hope that serves you. Let me recap. What is your plan?
00:20:55.240 Why did you fail? What are your resources? What and who are your resources? What information
00:21:01.580 do you not have? And then number five, what systems do you have in place? And also how can
00:21:07.560 your current systems be improved? I hope that serves you guys. And I also hope to see you
00:21:11.480 on Thursday, 8 o'clock p.m. Eastern at theironcouncil.com slash preview. Until then, guys, go out there,
00:21:17.380 take action, implement your plans, and become a man you are meant to be. Thank you for listening
00:21:23.800 to the Order of Man podcast. If you're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man
00:21:28.660 you were meant to be, we invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.