Order of Man - December 29, 2023


When Discipline Falls Flat | FRIDAY FIELD NOTES


Episode Stats

Length

21 minutes

Words per Minute

202.31079

Word Count

4,360

Sentence Count

300

Misogynist Sentences

1


Summary

In this episode, Ryan talks about when discipline falls flat and gives 5 questions to ask yourself that will help you get back on the path. The other resource, The Iron Council, is open for reservations until the 7th of January.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest. Embrace your fears and boldly chart
00:00:04.980 your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time. Every time.
00:00:10.460 You are not easily deterred or defeated. Rugged. Resilient. Strong. This is your life. This is who
00:00:17.200 you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,
00:00:22.780 you can call yourself a man. Gentlemen, what is going on today? My name is Ryan Mickler.
00:00:27.460 I'm your host and the founder of the Order of Man podcast and movement. Welcome here today.
00:00:32.520 We're in the midst of the holiday season. Christmas was last week. And of course,
00:00:37.000 we've got New Year's coming up on Monday. And I know a lot of people are thinking about what
00:00:40.800 they want to accomplish as they roll into 2024. I've got a couple of resources for you today that
00:00:45.460 I think and I hope will help you. Number one is this podcast. Today, we're going to be talking about
00:00:50.240 when discipline falls flat. And specifically, what I'm going to address is five questions that you
00:00:55.760 can ask yourself that will help you get back on the path. I know it might be a little premature
00:01:00.340 to start talking about discipline falling flat considering we're not even into the new year.
00:01:05.700 Most people last two, three, four weeks. And so you're probably all excited and the willpower is
00:01:11.220 there and you've got your why and a strong reason for doing what you're doing and how you're going
00:01:15.960 to improve. But I'm going to share with you preemptively how you can make sure that you
00:01:19.740 sustain the momentum. We'll get into that in just a second. The other resource that I want to share
00:01:24.580 with you is our exclusive brotherhood, the Iron Council. Now it is open. Usually we close it
00:01:29.740 at the end of the year. This year, I decided to leave it open until the 7th of January. So if you're
00:01:37.640 coming to the game a little bit late or just hearing about the podcast, or you've been on the fence about
00:01:41.660 joining the Iron Council, you have until January 7th to do it. And specifically, I've got a really,
00:01:48.120 really good free resource for you. We're going to be giving you a preview, a little peek behind the
00:01:53.400 curtain into what we do inside of our exclusive brotherhood that we've been going with for eight
00:01:57.800 years now. And you're going to be able to check that out on Thursday night of next week. So that's
00:02:03.100 Thursday, January 4th. Thursday, January 4th at 8 o'clock Eastern PM. 8 o'clock PM Eastern time.
00:02:10.960 We're going to be giving you a little peek. You're going to be able to ask questions. You're going to
00:02:14.820 be able to see the framework that we use, the network that we have, the tools, the resources,
00:02:19.320 everything that's available in the Iron Council. And all you have to do is go to theironcouncil.com
00:02:25.180 slash preview, theironcouncil.com slash preview. And you'll be able to get a little peek behind the
00:02:32.440 curtain into what we do. Again, that's going to be Thursday, the 4th at 8 o'clock PM Eastern
00:02:36.300 at theironcouncil.com slash preview. I hope to see you there. All right, guys, let's talk about
00:02:43.220 when discipline falls flat. Now, look, we've all heard discipline equals freedom and you just have
00:02:50.020 to do it and power through it and just make it happen. And I believe that there's validity to
00:02:55.480 that. I believe that it's important that we set our minds to accomplish something and we do whatever
00:03:00.980 it takes for however long it takes to accomplish that desire, that goal, that objective. But the
00:03:08.200 reality and studies and research suggest that our willpower is fleeting, that even though we have the
00:03:14.200 best of intentions, we have things we want to accomplish, we have systems in place, we have
00:03:18.660 all the willpower in the world, we're ready to go and we're excited about our why as to what we're
00:03:22.500 doing. Even then, life gets in the way, you get tired, things come up, we deal with unfortunate
00:03:29.800 circumstances, we get busy with other things, or simply we just fall back into old patterns and
00:03:35.880 habits. You don't want that to happen. I don't want that to happen. So when discipline does fall
00:03:40.840 short, and it does, and it has for you, I'm sure as it has for me, what then do you do? This podcast
00:03:46.460 today is not about me giving you all the answers, but I want to give you a couple of questions that I
00:03:51.880 have asked myself that have helped me get back on the path when everything else seems to be falling
00:03:57.920 apart or not working the way that I had hoped. So the first question is, what is your plan?
00:04:03.420 If you notice that you are falling behind on accomplishing your gym objectives in your fitness
00:04:09.840 and health, or your business goals, whatever it may be, then you have to ask yourself,
00:04:15.820 why or what is it the plan that I have in place? Most people don't have a plan. When it comes to New
00:04:21.100 Year's resolutions, they say to themselves, you know, I just want to lose weight. That's not a plan.
00:04:26.820 That might be a goal. It's not a great goal because it's not real specific, like a smart goal,
00:04:31.740 if you will, but it's not even a plan. Well, I want to make more money this year. Again,
00:04:37.320 an objective, something you want to do, but how in the world are you going to accomplish that?
00:04:41.740 It would be like going to coach an NFL football team. And when they're going to hire you,
00:04:47.720 or you're talking to the press about what your plan is for this coming week or the season,
00:04:52.120 you saying, we're going to win. Okay. How are you going to do that? I don't know. We're going to
00:04:56.380 figure it out along the way. Guys, it doesn't work. So you have to have a plan in place to
00:05:01.520 ensure that it happens. And the more specific you can be with regards to your plan, the better off
00:05:06.320 you're going to be. Now, a lot of the times I've talked with men who won't actually design,
00:05:12.920 let alone implement a plan because they're worried that it won't work anyways. And I've got news for
00:05:16.920 you. It probably won't. The plan that you craft, even if it's the perfectly crafted,
00:05:22.880 beautiful document or Excel worksheet or whatever planning tool you're using out there, it's not
00:05:31.740 going to work the way that you want. Just recognize that now and don't pigeonhole yourself into the
00:05:37.160 plan, but use it as a compass to help you get to where you want to go. Things are inevitably going
00:05:42.340 to come up. You're going to get busy. You're going to get distracted. Your priorities are going to
00:05:46.760 change. External circumstances might be thrust upon you that you're not able currently to deal with.
00:05:52.280 Things are going to happen, but that doesn't mean that you can't change your plan down the road.
00:05:57.240 You can. All that I want you to do is come up with a plan with the information that you have
00:06:01.940 at your disposal right now. I don't know what's going to happen this afternoon. I don't know what's
00:06:07.480 going to happen in a week. I don't know what's going to happen in two years, but I can make a plan,
00:06:11.240 not on that, but what I'm dealing with right now. I talked with a friend who's currently going
00:06:17.800 through, it looks like a separation and a divorce. And up until this point, he's played defense
00:06:22.900 because he's making his decisions based on what might happen in the future. And I know there needs
00:06:27.620 to be some projecting. You need to prepare yourself, especially in these circumstances for
00:06:32.100 what might happen. Sure, do that. But playing defense isn't going to help you accomplish your
00:06:37.500 goals, objectives, and make you feel good about yourself. You need to be preemptive. You need to go on
00:06:42.440 the offense, which means control the controllables, identify what those things are, and then make a
00:06:48.300 plan to ensure that you're going to go to the gym, or you're going to make the sales call, or you're
00:06:53.120 going to court your wife again, or you're going to name whatever it is that you want to do in order
00:07:00.040 to accomplish those goals. Have a plan. If you're interested in what that might look like, you can go
00:07:04.660 check out our battle planner at order of man.com slash battle planner, or 12, the number 12,
00:07:11.460 12weekbattleplanner.com will let you have access to the app that's available to draft out and map
00:07:18.340 out your plan. All right. So number two, now that you have a plan in place, I'm going to go to the
00:07:23.480 gym every single morning, Monday through Friday at 6 a.m. And I'm going to do this workout on Monday,
00:07:30.620 this workout on Tuesday, this workout on Wednesday, this workout on Thursday, this workout on Friday.
00:07:34.660 And it's going to take me an hour. I'm going to have my pre-workout ready to go. I'm going to have a
00:07:39.560 post-workout, or I'm going to drink enough water. I'm going to have my gym clothes laid out. I'm
00:07:43.120 going to hire this trainer. I'm going to hire this nutritionist, whatever it might be having that plan
00:07:47.360 in place. Now, what you have to do is if you're falling behind, you have to ask yourself, where
00:07:51.720 did it fail? Where did that plan fail? Let me give you an example. I have a goal to go into the gym
00:07:57.520 every single morning. So the other day I went to the gym, as I always do. I woke up at 530,
00:08:03.900 I got ready. I got my pre-workout ready. And I went to the gym. I got to the gym, started to walk
00:08:11.200 to the door, realized I didn't have my key fob with me to get into the gym. So it didn't work.
00:08:17.600 Okay. The plan failed. I still had the plan in place, but it didn't work properly because I had
00:08:22.200 failed in a component of that plan. In this case, I had left the key fob in the other vehicle. So I went
00:08:27.860 back, grabbed the key fob out of the other vehicle, went back to the gym, and I got about half the
00:08:33.240 workout in that I normally do because of time constraints. Now, did it work perfectly? No.
00:08:37.460 Did I still get it done? Yes. But where did it fail? In that case, I didn't have the key fob.
00:08:41.860 So what can I do to ensure that that doesn't happen again? Well, make that part of the ritual
00:08:48.180 or the checklist. Just like a pilot would have a checklist, a pre-flight checklist before he flies,
00:08:54.180 I should have a pre-checklist before I go to the gym. Is my drink ready? Are my clothes laid out?
00:09:01.020 Do I know the workout? And do I have my key fob? Okay. That's a simple fix, but I had the plan,
00:09:07.180 realized where it broke down because I was willing to analyze it and then corrected it so that I can
00:09:11.780 move forward. And that's a simple example, but there might be something as maybe even serious as
00:09:17.960 the breakdown of your long-term relationship or even your marriage. So the question is, did you have a
00:09:23.500 plan? Most of us don't. I didn't have a plan. And that's part of the reason that the marriage
00:09:29.180 didn't work is that I set things on cruise control, autopilot. And because I did, I didn't
00:09:35.320 know. I didn't recognize when things were falling apart. I should have. I could have. I'm not denying
00:09:39.680 that. But I didn't know because the plan wasn't in place and I really didn't have any way of reviewing
00:09:44.680 what was breaking down. But had I had a plan to show her how much I appreciate her or continue to
00:09:51.140 court her or any number of things to improve the relationship, open communication and dialogue,
00:09:56.400 conflict resolution, all the things that we talk about, then I could point to something and say,
00:10:01.040 well, we don't communicate real well. So what can we do? I can address that assertively with her.
00:10:06.040 We could potentially go to counseling. We could look at an online course or program available for
00:10:09.980 communication. But the point is, if I have a plan in the relationship, just like you should,
00:10:16.160 then you can point to what's going wrong and work on it. It's the same thing in business.
00:10:19.560 If you're down 25% in revenue this month, but you had a plan for that revenue, you can go back and
00:10:26.320 you can actually look at the numbers and see, okay, well, we're up in sales here, but we were
00:10:30.180 significantly down in sales here. Why? Well, maybe you forgot to send an email. Maybe you were in the
00:10:35.860 middle of hiring a new key player for your team. Well, at least now you know, and you can ask yourself,
00:10:42.120 why did this fail? And then most importantly, what do I need to do to improve it?
00:10:46.740 All right. Number three. So we have, what is your plan? Where did it fail? Number three,
00:10:52.700 what are your resources? Okay. When it comes to improving in your life, you need new stimulus,
00:10:59.780 new information, new resources, new training and education in your mind so that you can overcome
00:11:05.840 something that you have not previously overcome. If it's relational issues, hiring a coach or a
00:11:12.200 therapist or going to a course would help you gain new insight and education into how to improve that
00:11:19.360 marriage. If it's business and you don't know how to market properly, well, a resource that you need
00:11:25.440 to bring in is either a marketing team or go to a marketing conference or watch some YouTube videos
00:11:30.740 or listen to a podcast or hire a coach. I may have said that there's all sorts of resources that you
00:11:37.700 need available. If you're trying to improve your fitness and you notice that you're doing really,
00:11:42.680 really well for a week or two or three weeks, and then you fall off the wagon because you don't know
00:11:47.540 what to do. Okay. Well, you had a plan. It wasn't very good because you don't know what to do.
00:11:51.480 You know why you failed because you were bored and you weren't being,
00:11:54.740 you weren't properly going through the motions to improve your performance.
00:11:58.180 And number three, what are your resources? Well, in that case, you might need to hire a nutritionist
00:12:02.500 because you're not doing it on your own, or you might need to hire a trainer to actually program
00:12:08.860 workouts for you. Now, inevitably, when I talk about this, people are like, well, that'd be,
00:12:13.520 that's easy for you to say. It's expensive and I don't have any money. Guys, you can jump on
00:12:17.360 online and find free workout programs by just typing in Google free workout programs for
00:12:24.520 losing fat or building muscle or improving my deadlift or for running a marathon.
00:12:30.940 Please don't ever use the excuse that you don't have any money. Now, in a lot of instances,
00:12:35.740 you get what you pay for. And should you work to improve your financial acumen and standing so that
00:12:41.200 you can hire the best? Sure. But in the meantime, you can do something about it where you currently are
00:12:47.940 until you get to that point. And by the way, the only way you get to that point
00:12:51.780 is by starting to improve your current situation. So what are the resources that are at your disposal
00:12:58.360 and what resources do you need? Another great resource that many men don't tap into is having
00:13:03.980 a band of brothers, having people they can rely on, having people who are successful in their family
00:13:09.400 dynamic or their business dynamic, or with regards to their health that are going to help keep you in
00:13:14.040 check and give you tools and systems and resources that you need to thrive. Or calling your brother
00:13:20.340 or your uncle or your father or a neighbor or whoever you consult with and whoever's advocating
00:13:26.180 for you and you're advocating for them, an accountability partner almost. If you need
00:13:30.660 something, this is why we created the Iron Council. That again is our exclusive brotherhood. We're going
00:13:36.040 to do that preview next week on Thursday. It's January 4th, 8 p.m. Eastern on Thursday of next week.
00:13:42.920 And if you want to check it out and how that might serve you with regards to who you need in your
00:13:47.340 corner, other men, then you can go to theironcouncil.com slash preview, theironcouncil.com
00:13:53.500 slash preview, and you'll be able to check it out on Thursday at 8 p.m. on the 4th. So who are your
00:13:59.880 resources? Who is currently in your corner that you're not using? Who do you need to bring into your
00:14:04.800 corner and onto your team so that you can improve your situation? Number four, what information do you
00:14:11.200 not have? Again, I already alluded to this. If you're failing at the gym because you don't have
00:14:17.880 a workout program, then you're missing a crucial key component. You can go up and show up to the gym
00:14:24.420 and go do some bench and go do some curls and go do some skull crushers. Maybe do a little shoulder
00:14:30.880 work and do a few pull-ups and do some abs. You could definitely do that. And will you see results?
00:14:37.500 Yeah, if you do that enough, you'll probably see some results depending on where you are on your
00:14:41.640 fitness journey currently, but it's not as good as it could be. If you want to build a six-pack,
00:14:48.060 then you can go wing it or you can get new information. It's all free. It's all there.
00:14:54.160 It's all available. If you want to improve your marriage, it's all there. It's all free. It's all
00:14:58.200 available. If you want to grow your business, it's all free. It's all there. It's all available.
00:15:01.440 Too often, we have these goals that we want to accomplish and we're aiming at the wrong target.
00:15:07.500 We think that we need to be doing sales development or client retention or gaining
00:15:13.500 new sales. When in all reality, it could be just learning how to market better or learning how to
00:15:17.820 close better or learning the art of following up or how to present yourself in a more professional
00:15:25.320 manner. There's information that you're missing. If you have a coach, he's going to help you identify
00:15:30.400 what that is. If, for example, you're going to the gym and you're busting your butt at the gym,
00:15:36.460 but your nutrition's all out of whack, it doesn't really matter how much you're doing
00:15:40.660 at the gym. If your nutrition is garbage, you're probably not going to experience the results that
00:15:44.820 you need. Do you go to the gym more? No. The information you need is how to plan your meals,
00:15:52.340 meal prep, what kind of foods, what kind of proportions, what do you need to eat and how
00:15:56.620 much of it and when. That's the information you need. Find the right information. It's there and it's
00:16:01.940 available. And if you don't want it, you'll make an excuse. And that's how you know you don't want
00:16:06.460 it. You can say whatever you want to say, but if you make excuses for what you know you should be
00:16:11.560 doing, then you just don't want it bad enough. And that might be okay, but don't deceive yourself
00:16:16.820 and tell yourself that you want something without a willingness to go out there, find the information
00:16:21.980 and resources that you need, plug them into the right places, and then go on about what you want to
00:16:27.200 accomplish. Guys, number five, and I think this is the most important thing. There's a lot of
00:16:32.280 research on this. There's two great books. One is called The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg.
00:16:36.620 The other one is called Atomic Habits by James Clear. And James Clear says, and I'm paraphrasing,
00:16:41.380 we don't rise to our discipline. We fall to our systems. I totally butchered that, but I think and
00:16:49.400 hope you get the point. Just because we're disciplined or committed doesn't mean we're going to
00:16:53.460 accomplish a goal. We are going to fall. Our best performance is only as good as the systems that we
00:17:00.540 have in place. That's probably a better way to say it. Much more eloquent. Our performance is only as
00:17:07.500 good as the systems that we have in place. So what is your system? Do you have a checklist? I have mine
00:17:14.500 right here. I know what I'm going to do every single day. I write it down. I check it off. I reference
00:17:21.600 it often every single day. At the end of the day, I look back and ask myself, what did I get done?
00:17:26.420 What didn't I get done? What am I going to do tomorrow? Where am I going to plug it in? In
00:17:30.560 what order? When I go to the gym, what is my program? What is my training schedule? Who's
00:17:35.640 helping me? What am I going to be eating this week? I have all my meals delivered. So I know exactly what
00:17:40.380 I'm going to be eating. When do I have my children with me? When are they with their mother? What am I
00:17:45.600 going to talk about with the podcast? I've got tons of podcast ideas here on my phone. Guys, I have a system
00:17:50.800 for everything. I have calendars. I have notepads. I have planners. I have task lists on my phone.
00:17:59.700 Systems for everything. Your performance is only as good as the systems that you have in place.
00:18:06.380 And if you're noticing things fall through the cracks, you're not compelled or motivated to do
00:18:11.280 something. You're not performing in an aspect that you wish you would be or that you have in the past.
00:18:16.880 You have something skewed about your system. So you have the plan and then you have the system in
00:18:23.300 order to implement the plan. So if we go back to that football analogy, saying you want to win games
00:18:27.920 is not enough. Having a plan, hey, we're going to be a heavy passing team and we're going to beat them
00:18:34.560 in the air or we're going to beat them on the run or we're going to have the fastest, most agile
00:18:38.940 defense. We've got a solid offense, but we're really going to make sure this defense is exactly where it
00:18:43.400 needs to be. So other teams can't score against us. Like those are the plans. And then the system
00:18:48.540 is, so we're going to train three, four hours every single day. On Mondays, we train this. On Tuesdays,
00:18:55.100 we train that. On Wednesdays, we train this. Here's our training facilities. Here's what we need in our
00:19:00.500 training facilities. Here's what we already have. These are all the tools and systems in place in order
00:19:05.040 to help you accomplish your goals. Now, as I say this, I understand that this is a 25 minute
00:19:10.840 podcast. And I understand also, if you haven't really done much of this planning in your life,
00:19:15.600 this can seem like a daunting task. And I don't think that you need to do it all at once,
00:19:20.560 but these are the five key questions you need to ask yourself so that you can improve.
00:19:24.500 The challenge is, like I said, you don't have all the resources at your disposal. Now you could go out
00:19:29.980 and do it on your own. And if you can, and you feel like you just need to implement
00:19:33.100 certain elements of what I talked about today, then by all means, go out and implement it.
00:19:37.360 But if you want something a little bit more, that's where the Iron Council would come in.
00:19:41.280 And we're going to help you accomplish these. This might seem like a sales pitch. In a way,
00:19:45.580 I want to be able to provide resources to you. But that said, you can go out and do it on your own.
00:19:51.800 I don't recommend it. I don't advocate for that. I don't even do that myself. I have coaches.
00:19:57.560 I have mentors. I have programs and systems that I belong to, people that I report to,
00:20:03.180 other men that I have conversations with so I can stay on task. If you're looking for the same
00:20:07.520 thing, make sure you check out the Iron Council at theironcouncil.com. Or if you want a sneak
00:20:15.040 peek and a behind the scenes look at what we're doing inside of our brotherhood, then you can go
00:20:19.140 on Thursday, the 4th at 8 p.m. Eastern to theironcouncil.com slash preview.
00:20:25.280 Theironcouncil.com slash preview. Guys, if you have any questions for me, thoughts, concerns,
00:20:32.360 considerations, future topics, whatever it might be, please connect with me on Instagram
00:20:37.680 at Ryan Michler, on X at Ryan Michler, on YouTube at Order of Man, or even email me if you have
00:20:44.200 questions about what we're doing here or our brotherhood, the Iron Council at Ryan at order
00:20:49.140 of man.com. All right, guys, I hope that serves you. Let me recap. What is your plan?
00:20:55.240 Why did you fail? What are your resources? What and who are your resources? What information
00:21:01.580 do you not have? And then number five, what systems do you have in place? And also how can
00:21:07.560 your current systems be improved? I hope that serves you guys. And I also hope to see you
00:21:11.480 on Thursday, 8 o'clock p.m. Eastern at theironcouncil.com slash preview. Until then, guys, go out there,
00:21:17.380 take action, implement your plans, and become a man you are meant to be. Thank you for listening
00:21:23.800 to the Order of Man podcast. If you're ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man
00:21:28.660 you were meant to be, we invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.