When Prepping Goes Too Far, Best Single Piece of Advice, and Contentment vs. Complacency | ASK ME ANYTHING
Episode Stats
Length
1 hour and 13 minutes
Words per Minute
185.11319
Summary
On this episode of the podcast, the brother and sister duo of the sit down with Ryan and Sean and talk about being a man of action. They talk about what it means to be a man and what it takes to be one.
Transcript
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You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest, embrace your fears, and boldly chart
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your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time, every time.
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You are not easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong. This is your life. This is
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who you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,
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you can call yourself a man. Sean, how's it going, man? It's great. Good to see you.
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Thanks. Yeah, Ryan gave it to me at the Legacy event, which was cool.
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Well, and you guys, listen, you're not going to get a free one from Ryan. So if you guys do want
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a hat, go to store.orderofman.com, get your swag. I think you could probably get an order in maybe
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today, and then you're probably risking yourselves in regards to getting some stuff in for Christmas.
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So Sean, I have to ask you this question because I do this, and luckily my wife doesn't listen to
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the podcast, so she has no idea. But during the holiday season, I start buying shit, right? Not
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shit. I end up buying good stuff for my family. And I swear I buy more stuff for myself during the
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holiday season than I normally do because as I'm shopping, I'm like, oh, I'll get that. And so all
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these packages are coming in. And my wife's legit thinking like, holy crap, honey, we shouldn't get
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so much stuff for the kids. And I'm secretly like, actually, half of that's for me. So do you do this
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at all? Or is this just me being in? And I get that this is entirely selfish. This goes against the
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whole concept of Christmas. But I don't know what it is. I start buying more things during the Christmas
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holiday for myself. So I don't know. I, yes, I fall into that too. The funny thing is I've
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actually bought a couple of things that I was wanting anyways. Because my wife and I are in
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this weird situation where we don't wait for holidays or things. It's just like, as we want
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things or need them, we just buy them. And, and so I found myself doing that a couple of times and
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it got here and we're wrapping gifts. And I told my wife, you know what, here, if you want a present
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to get me here, it is totally. So like surprise last Christmas, I even wrapped, like I felt guilty
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that I bought myself some cool stuff. So I even wrapped it for myself. So like at least so I'd
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like have to delay opening it at least, you know, like that was like the least I could do, you know?
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So I don't know. Maybe it's first world problems. It's a good sign when you're in a position where
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you're like, I want something and you get it and it's not like a big deal. Right. And I,
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and I remember those days, man, I remember the days of wanting something and knowing I can't get
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it. Right. And because it would be a bad purchase because, you know, my ratio of income to what I
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want was not even close, you know? So I guess it's a good sign to be in this phase of life where
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if you need something or want something, you can do it. And it's not really that big of a deal.
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Yeah. I think it took me a couple of decades to get over that kind of being broke. I remember not
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having money for gas. I, you know, was living in my car and not even able to like, I'd have to call
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a local friend to see if they had 20 bucks they could bring me at the gas station. Cause my, you
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know, my card was tapped out or whatever. Totally. I remember like, it's just silly, crazy. Like I
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should go to the dentist. I'm not going to the dentist. Why? Cause I don't have the money to pay for
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the dentist. Right. And I mean, I remember scenarios where, you know, I'd pound ibuprofen,
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like there's no tomorrow. And then I had a, like, I'd even learn. How's this? I learned about my body
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adapting to ibuprofen due to the pain of my teeth and going, Oh, it's not working anymore. I'm
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doubling my dose. Like I got to go Tylenol. I got to like mix this thing up. You know what I mean?
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To like delay having to go to the dentist, you know? And, and, and, and it's not until I was
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like losing my mind and losing sleep that I was like, I got to go in. Like, I just got to bite
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the bullet here. Um, which by the way, I later learned you can actually die from like infections
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in your teeth. So, you know, anyone listening, don't do what I did, but, but you know, those are
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tough times. Like I even remember some buddies, like they would go give a plasma. Like that was a
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strategy, right? It's like, Oh, you know, I'm going to increase my cashflow. I'm going to donate
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plasma for a little bit of extra income, you know? So it's, I did that one time. It's I, if I'm being
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honest, I did it once. I didn't tell anybody. Yeah. Uh, good times, man. What? And it's funny.
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It sounds so cliche, but, um, I was just reading a quote the other day on, on Insta and it was about
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the, you know, the, the most struggling times in your life you look back on. And those were some of
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the best. And I know it sounds corny, but it's totally true. My entire, you know, and I don't
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want to sound all negative. Like everyone's guys are like, whatever you guys don't have a hard. Um,
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but I, you know, I had a tough upbringing and I would consider, and you know what, those are some
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of the best times. Those were the best Christmases. Those were the best scenarios where I didn't get a
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present for my birthday, or we were the poor family that like the neighborhood donated blankets to,
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you know, and, and those were some of the best times they really were. So yeah. Best learning
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experiences at the very least. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. So anyhow, I, I digress it. You know,
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it's a tradition for us to waste everyone's time, at least for a few minutes before we get into
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questions. Yeah. So, Hey, I will say that last time we were together, there was a huge spike in people
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listening. You know, Ryan said it's because Dan Crenshaw was on that week, but I, I begged to differ.
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I begged to differ as well. So, um, but you know, Ryan does have a sensitive ego. And so if you guys
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want, don't let him know how great this episode went. So then that way he doesn't get offended and,
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you know, doesn't think he's not the man after all it is his movement. So yeah, he is the man there.
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So, yeah. Um, so we're going to field questions from Facebook. That's facebook.com slash group
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slash order, man. If you guys want to join us, join the community. And, you know, we talked about
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this all the time band with us, you know, it's, um, it's refreshing Sean to be part of a movement
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that is on the court in life and not sitting in the sideline and complaining. And, and I think by
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default, I think it's very human nature. Someone, you know, even suggested to me the other day on a
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post that like, maybe it's a, a, a, a form of, um, socialization, right? White people are victims.
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I actually think it's default. I think it's a little bit of human nature for us not to take
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responsibility and, and point the finger and blame. Um, and that's not what we're about. Um,
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in order, man, that's not what we're about in the iron council. It's about getting on the court and
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making a difference. And so if you guys are tired of being spectators and you feel like you're
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complaining about a bunch of stuff, I would challenge you. What are you doing about it?
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And if you're not doing anything about it, then band with us, join us in the iron council or join
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us at least in the Facebook group and start banning with us and start perpetuating or pushing out,
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uh, the message of sovereignty, um, which is really the message of ownership, you know, and,
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and taking back your lives and, and, um, taking control of how things are. So anyway,
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I agree. And as you say that, if you, if you're listening to this thinking, well,
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what is sovereignty? What does that mean? Read the book, get the book. Yeah. Read it. It'll,
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it'll clear up a lot for you. Yeah. And you can get that book. I think you can maybe get some
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signed copies at the store. Once again, store.orderman.com. All right, Sean, you're
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ready to jump into these questions. So I'll read these off since, uh, there's a tradition of me
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slaughtering names. No, no sense of throwing you under the bus because I know you obviously would
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never pronounce the name incorrectly. Um, but Ryan likes to continually make me look bad. So I'll,
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I'll keep reading questions. So, and then we'll go with it. Sound good. Sounds great. All right. I
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got my caffeine. I'm ready. So Jonathan Smulders, what are your thoughts on prepping and self
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sustainability, particularly food and water storage, growing your own food, hunting and
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et cetera. How do you find the line between being reasonably prepared, being obsessively paranoid?
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So how do you not become the guy right in the neighborhood, the prepper, which I'm sorry. I know
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you're supposed to answer these first. I find it interesting to be right. Because that guy's only
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that guy until, until shit hits the fan and then he's like a genius. Right. So, but anyhow, go ahead.
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But I, you know, for me, this has evolved even over the last few years, say like five or six years as
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I got into hunting. Um, cause I didn't grow up hunting or doing any of that, but wanting to,
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and this is obviously like five, six years ago, started watching, um, uh, all the, I guess you
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could say like vegan things on Netflix, like food ink and you know, all of these that's kind of the
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documentaries around, you know, or the meat eaters one where you're supposed to watch it and feel
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like you feel bad, like you shouldn't eat meat anymore. Yeah. And they're, and they're more like
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just talking about, you know, just how bad our food is. And, and, um, and I think most of them are
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trying to sway you to be vegan, but I, I got that. I just wanted to source more of my food, know where
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it was coming from and started asking about hunting and other things and had a friend who got me into
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bow hunting. And then, um, you know, kind of along the same time, it was looking at every aspect.
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So since then we, we built a garden, you know, on our property, we started hunting, started doing
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some of those things. Um, we already had a bunch of food, uh, storage, uh, that we had in for my wife
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and my daughter have, uh, my, my wife has lupus and my daughter has autoimmune issues as well. Um,
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and some sensory processing stuff. And so they, everything they have can't have gluten in it.
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And so our food storage is, you know, is we had to choose that wisely. Uh, so we went through that
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process and we have at least a year. Um, and then our water, we have, holy smokes, about 150 gallons,
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uh, is what we keep in rotation. Um, and then, uh, then we have a generator backup and those sorts of
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things. So it's ours is really fundamental, but it's more than most, I think, but it's also been
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built up over the last five, six years. You know, we're now our, I have a couple of freezers. Those
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are full of meat that we've harvested either myself or my sons. Um, and it's, uh, it's really
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changed over the last few years, but I can tell you over that five, six years, I've never felt more
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confident, especially through the pandemic. You know, we didn't need toilet paper. We didn't need
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water. We didn't need food. We didn't have, we didn't worry about going to the store. Literally.
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We didn't go to the store at all. I think when people were scared in the very beginning, really
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scared, we didn't go anywhere for, I think two, three weeks. We just didn't have to.
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Yeah. Well, and how, you know, and this is a whole other debatable thing around, you know,
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did that toll of, of COVID and how serious, but let's imagine it was like really bad. Like,
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I don't know, 50% fatality rate. And would you go to the store? You know what I mean? And how many
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of us would be able to survive without going to the store and knowing that like going to the store
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meant you might die, right? Like, yeah, that's legit, man. I, um, I have to ask this question
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really from my own personal perspective. What are you using for, for water storage? The, the white one
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with the metal frame, like those big square ones, what are you using for, you know, we, we started,
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no, we started with these big, um, 50 gallon drums, like the blue ones. We started with that
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on the bottom or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. We still have those, but we honestly, it's, we have, um,
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Arrowhead, you know, which I think is owned by Nestle now. And the, those five gallon bottles,
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they make racks for them. A lot of people don't know. And all you have to do is call and ask.
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And so it, it lays them sideways and you can stack them. So I have a block stack on one of the walls
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in my garage of, you know, 30 of those, 30 of those bottles, you know, they're nice. Cause it's
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easy. You can rotate them. They stay for it. You know, all that stuff. Yeah, totally. Well,
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the other thing to consider too. So, but we're not even asking Johnson's and they travel, we'll get,
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what do you get to your question in a second? But after Katrina, I actually shifted my opinion
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about food storage quite a bit. So, you know, back in the day when I was a kid, food storage was canned
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food, right? You would have all these canned foods and people that was really organized would have
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this cool little cycling thing where you grab the can in the front and you drop the old, the new cans
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in the back. And you know, you have this system. And then after Katrina, you're like, that didn't work
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because their entire basement's underwater. What are you going to load up like 500 cans of food in a
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backpack? Like that's not going to work either. And so I kind of shifted my opinion about food storage
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from heavy and short-term cans to like, actually I'm going dry pack light food. So I could actually
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load it up, throw it in a truck and, and take off. And, and I kind of like, and to, to the point
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with your water approach, the nice part about that, you could load that up, right? Like you could take
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half of it or all of it really, and load it up in your truck versus those, you know, which ones I'm
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talking about, right? I, my apologies guys for the ignorance here, but there's those giant ones
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that are like, Oh yeah. Like 250 gallon and they have a white frame. Those are cool. You're not
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loading those anywhere, right? They don't move anywhere. Yeah. They're not moving. They're
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sticking on the side of your house. And so it might make sense to have those, but I like what you're
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doing in the sense of there's some portability to it in the event that you needed to. So, but back to
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Jonathan's question, how, where's the line, where's the line, Sean, from your perspective
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in regards to being prepared versus being obsessed and paranoid? I mean, I think if you're really want
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to know that line, just check out that show preppers because I mean, that's compare yourself
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to those guys. When you start digging a hole under your house and, you know, you put a HEPA filter in
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it and all these things to, you know, literally self-sustain and, and a nuclear Holocaust, you know,
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then that that's that. And like you said, it, people could say that's past the line,
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unless that happens. Right. Unless there's like a nuclear fallout and then you're the guy like
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Cloverfield. Right. And that, I don't know if you've seen that, like the, like, you know,
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the guy who seems like he's psycho, but he's the one guy surviving when actually a better reference
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is Encino man, Encino man. Remember like, uh, like, uh, they kept him in the basement when he was a
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little kid and he came out and he was like, he thought it was the fifties. Is that right?
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Encino man? It's not Encino man. That's a same guy though. Same guy. I know what you're talking
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about. It's super blast to the past. Is that it? Something like, I know what you're talking about
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though. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And his parents just like raising and they stayed in their bunker
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until he was like an adult kind of thing. Right. Yeah. It's super funny. Well, I think here's,
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here's the all joking aside, Jonathan, I think the line is, do you stop living in the moment?
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Right. Like I think that's, and we could probably use that line to determine a whole lot of things,
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right? When, if you're, when you're going overboard on anything, the question is, is, are, have you,
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are you forgetting to enjoy life? Um, and I think if you're doing that because you're so paranoid about
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preparing for a disaster in the future, you got a problem. Maybe that's the line.
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Yeah. You know, and, and you have to think through it too. Like there's, I know I have a bunch of gas
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and I have a trailer, you know, that has a gas pump on it. So like the plan is to hook up to that,
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take off, take some of the gas cans that we have, and we would probably leave. Like we have a place to
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go to now, you know, that, that we didn't use to, but we do now. And, and, but a lot could happen
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in between, you know, it's, we're not necessarily going to hunker down here. So there's a lot of
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different things to think about, but I think what you said is true. You, I think it's worse
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that people procrastinate. They tend to put it off and then they don't have anything when they need
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it, you know, but then, like you said, just put yourself in a position where you're confident
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that you could go at least a month. Yeah. Um, so that you can feel that confidence, but you know,
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if you get obsessed beyond that, where it's making like, you're scared all the time, I think
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there's a problem. Yeah, for sure. Here's last example. We move on to the next question. Um,
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yeah. And once again, it's like, what, let me just say this often during the week, when we record
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these, I, I walk away going, I need to not maybe share too many personal things. You know what I mean?
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In fear of who listens. Um, so, so mom, if you're listening, uh, don't take this personal.
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I actually think that so much of our lives, including how we react to how we're parented
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is sometimes outside of the control of the parent, right? It's, you don't know what your kids are
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going to latch onto and what they're going to use as defining moments or, you know what I mean? Or
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what perspectives they're going to create, whether you intended that or not. So with that disclaimer,
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when I was a kid, um, for like Bible study or whatever, we would, my mom, we got in, in this
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phase of time, we were constantly reading books about the second coming, right? Like the, the,
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the books were like, you know, and the moon shall turn the blood. Right. And then like,
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after we finished that book, the next book was about, you know, fire and brimstone, you know,
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like, and it was these books, no joke. I'm like sixth grade. And I remember being depressed
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thinking I'm never going to grow up. I'm never going to get a chance to get married and have kids
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like the world by then. Yeah. And I was like, seriously, it kind of like mess with me quite a
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bit. There you go. You don't want to be that person that you're just so like diswrought and sad about the
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future because you've over, cause you're not living in the present. Right. And, and for me,
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like that was like a negative thing for me as a kid, I was like actually quite depressed about it.
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Now in the same breath, you know, maybe it helped me appreciate what I did have when I realized that
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the world wasn't going to end, you know, in, by the time I got into high school, you know, so
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you never know, I guess. So, all right. Next question, Jason Curtis.
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Um, we're going to Sean, what is the best single piece of advice you have ever received?
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Thanks for everything you guys do. Kip continue to, uh, that everything you and Kip continue to do.
00:19:32.160
So best advice you've ever received single piece, best advice. Oh my goodness. I don't even know how
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we should have prepped this. I mean, honestly, I'll take it from a marriage standpoint because I think
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in our, in our homes, right. It's in protecting, providing, presiding, uh, and as a husband and
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father, I think the best advice I ever got was she happy, me happy from one of my mentors. And it,
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it, it put me in a position where I really, instead of being selfish and, and focusing on what I wanted
00:20:12.760
and, and what I wanted my wife to do to make our lives better, made me focus on getting better.
00:20:19.820
Yeah. And, um, you know, without going over the line of just awaiting her beck and call. Right. But,
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um, you know, putting us in a position where I made that of most importance in our lives. And
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that's trickled into me being a better father leader in my business and my community and everything
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else. So I would say that would probably be the most valuable one to this point. I can't, the best
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advice I struggle with giving this because it's complex or I, at least it is complex in my mind.
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Maybe it's not complex once I explain it. Um, but let me do my best. The best advice I ever got
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was the power of choice in regards to relationships. And the, the best example I can give to this is,
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um, let me preface this by saying, I actually think that most people, if they haven't addressed it,
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probably have somewhat of a, an incomplete relationship with their parents. Um, especially
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in the climate that of our generation, especially with boys and fathers, there's, there's so many
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broken relationships. And, and so this probably that ends up being the best example. And what I would
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challenge, um, or what this advice really was is why, and so I'll just use maybe my dad as an example.
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Why do I love my dad? And, and when I, at first glance, right, when that question gets answered or
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a question, the question gets placed, you know, to us or asked of us, our immediate result is to come
00:22:06.800
up with the reasons why, right? It's like, why do you love your dad? Well, because, uh, he's a hard
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worker, um, because, um, he's considerate because he's this, because he's that. But for some of us,
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the answer could also be, why don't you love your dad? Right. And it's the same thing. It's a laundry
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list and how powerful it is to actually realize that you have a choice in that matter. And that I could
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actually love my dad, not because of any of those things, but strictly because I choose to.
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And that there's a level of accepting people for exactly the way they are without any pretense
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to actually love someone because you choose to love them in spite of their faults. And, and,
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and that's a really, really, at least for me, that's a very, very powerful way to look at relationships.
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Certainly when we talk about people that we're committed to like our wives or our family members,
00:23:09.140
because the reality of it is, is sometimes we get locked up in, in the reasons of why we love people.
00:23:15.960
And then what happens when they change? What happens, Sean, when someone doesn't have a good
00:23:23.660
reason to love their dad, that, that they don't have a good reason to love their mom,
00:23:29.460
that you can actually still choose to accept them exactly the way they are and actually choose to love
00:23:34.780
them because you choose to. And that was probably one of the most profound, um, probably advice I've
00:23:42.120
ever gotten. And, and it really allows me to focus on letting go of expectations as well as quote,
00:23:49.460
unquote reasons, and actually see people for who they are in the moment, uh, and have some humanity
00:23:55.760
around those relationships. Does that make sense? It makes perfect sense. It relieves a lot of weight
00:24:01.420
as well. As you were saying it, I thought of a book that I read, one of my favorite books,
00:24:05.280
I've recommended people all the time. It's called standing for something by a guy named Gordon B.
00:24:08.740
Hinckley. And, um, talks about the 10 virtues is what he calls it that can heal our hearts and homes.
00:24:14.620
And, uh, inside of that forgiveness is one love is one, you know, I mean, there's a, there's a laundry list
00:24:20.380
work, you know, uh, providence, that kind of stuff. Um, you know, but he talks a lot about forgiveness,
00:24:26.060
you know, like you're talking about, about love, uh, uh, just, uh, there's a, again, there's 10 of
00:24:32.080
them, you know, but that's what I think of is, is that that was an advice I got, but that's one of
00:24:36.260
the best books I've read and, and kind of calling me out on, on shortcomings I had and helping me
00:24:43.500
understand how I could make my life better. You know, it's been a while since I've read that book.
00:24:48.020
I need to actually need, I should probably read that again, actually. It's right in line with
00:24:51.900
what you just said though. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Jonathan's Mulders, Jonathan, that's two
00:24:56.560
questions. Dick, if I'd known that I would have skipped your first question. Uh, this is a good
00:25:02.280
one. So I want, I want to read it. So thoughts on Facebook's metaverse project and the idea of
00:25:07.500
virtual or augmented reality technology being incorporated into daily internet use beyond
00:25:12.200
gaming with screens already having a negative effect on our ability to present, connect with the
00:25:17.660
real world, making our daily internet use more immersive seems like it would only exact exacerbate
00:25:23.580
these issues. Your thoughts, Sean. You know, I, I, I just think of the movie ready player one.
00:25:33.140
If you've seen that. Yeah. And, uh, when I, when I watched it and then now with meta coming out,
00:25:39.720
it's, I mean, I just linked directly to that in the thought process of that and what that might be like.
00:25:45.500
And I think it's kind of inevitable at this point where we're already headed there. Uh, we were just
00:25:51.880
in Texas visiting and we went to this place. It was like a, you know, it was a game place. It was,
00:25:59.400
it was like an arcade. And I thought of arcades when I was a kid, they actually had an old frogger in
00:26:03.700
there. Right. And I was like, nice, you know, this is, this is kind of funny. I played pinball and
00:26:08.480
that stuff. But then we also played the, the VR games and it was unreal how those things are,
00:26:15.460
how real they seem, how you feel like you're going, you know, falling off of stuff and whatever
00:26:20.520
else. Yeah. And, um, and I just thought, well, this is where we're headed, whether we like it or
00:26:25.780
not. Um, you know, the only thing that scares me is that people spend more time. They enjoy that
00:26:32.880
better than their real life. And so I think it kind of depends on your viewpoint of it. Some people
00:26:39.300
would say, well, this is real life because you're still interacting with people. You know, it's a
00:26:43.460
place maybe where you'll do some things. You'll have a little more courage to try things because
00:26:47.680
you're not seeing them face to face. And, um, the consequence is different, but I think there's
00:26:53.680
dangers in that too. So, I mean, I'm not totally a hundred percent sure what to think of it at this
00:27:00.420
point, but I do think it's going to be an inevitable part of how we live our lives. Just
00:27:04.860
like our cell phones, we couldn't have imagined. Yeah. You know, to 20 years ago,
00:27:09.900
it was only 20 years ago. Um, you know, till now. Yeah. I, I find, you know, to your point,
00:27:19.320
you know, I, I remember the first time I was playing on a VR headset and it was, it was a stupid
00:27:25.780
plank game. Like we've all heard of these, like, you know, you walk on the plank and you jump off.
00:27:31.540
And I remember I was sitting in a room, this is in the early days, like almost like, I don't know,
00:27:36.380
five, maybe five years ago or something. And someone had the VR headset and they were projecting
00:27:41.220
what they saw on the screen and it looks fake, right? Like it doesn't look real. It's, it's obviously
00:27:48.040
like cartoon playing cartoon elevator. And the game was you'd get an elevator, you go up to like
00:27:53.240
a 50th floor, the elevator doors open. There's a plank and you walk out in the plank
00:27:57.560
and then you're supposed to jump off the plank. And people are like, I'll freaking out. Oh my gosh,
00:28:03.340
this is so crazy. You know, whatever. And I'm looking at the screen. I'm like, that looks fake.
00:28:06.380
Like this is stupid. And, and I, I didn't think much of it. And I was like, Oh, let me try this.
00:28:11.100
So I get on, I go up the damn elevator door opens. I see the plank, my heart heart rate skyrockets.
00:28:18.300
Wow. And I logically think in my mind, this is fake. I could build a carpet underneath my feet
00:28:27.180
in this conference room. I know it's not a real plank, but yet my, my mind or my instincts,
00:28:35.900
I should say probably are like, you're in danger, right? My heart rate, like it was a mind, like
00:28:43.180
Afro. I don't know what you want to call it. Like it was, it was really, really interesting.
00:28:48.060
And, and I think we have to consider the fact that, yeah, it's a game, Sean. It's not a big deal,
00:28:52.300
but part of your mind doesn't know that, right? Part of your instincts thinks it is real. Otherwise
00:28:57.900
there wouldn't be a massive dopamine dump. There wouldn't be excitement. There wouldn't be all
00:29:02.540
these things that make it appealing. If, if your body didn't think that there was some form of
00:29:09.180
reality in it. Right. So it's so interesting, but I think it's just like everything else, right? Like
00:29:14.280
these cell phones, man, these little squares are amazing and it could be used for greatness and it
00:29:20.440
could be used for evil. And I think, I think it's the same thing, right? I think, cause there are,
00:29:27.460
there are studies like where they're using virtual reality to address PTSD that, or psychology,
00:29:33.980
uh, or, uh, depression and other scenarios. So is there some good that could come up? Probably,
00:29:40.300
but is there some negative? Oh yeah. Right. And, and I think in a, in a world where
00:29:46.280
the deep and kind of, and maybe this is the theme of this call, um, cause we kind of started off with
00:29:52.320
it earlier, but like in the climate of this world being overly victim hoods, probably escaping reality
00:30:00.580
and hopping into virtual environment is probably not what we need more than toughening up and dealing
00:30:08.500
in reality. Right. The, the last thing we probably need is more escape scenarios to get away from,
00:30:14.560
you know, the quote unquote heartaches of life that are probably not heartaches. Let's be frank,
00:30:21.260
you know? And, and, and when I watched the, like the intro video from Zuckerberg, you know,
00:30:27.860
when he's talking about, well, you can escape scenarios so you can, you know, not be triggered
00:30:33.240
or what I'm like, really like that's the solution or, or should the solution be, Hey, how do I deal
00:30:40.160
with uncomfortable circumstances? How do I deal with my anger? How do I deal with frustration? How do I
00:30:47.180
deal with other humans versus, Oh, they make me upset. Thus they must be wrong. And let me now go
00:30:53.360
escape in some augmented reality instead of dealing with truth and reality. You know what I mean? I
00:31:00.520
just, I don't know. I don't think it's what we probably need, but I agree with you. I don't think
00:31:04.780
it's going away. Right. Like I don't, I think this is going to, this is going to happen anyway. The
00:31:10.240
question is, is how do we use the tool? Right. Yeah. And I think that's the important part. It's,
00:31:15.580
it's kind of like a, as you were talking, I thought of opioids, right. When they came out with,
00:31:20.540
with like Oxycontin and Oh man, this is great. It's, it works so much better for pain and,
00:31:25.500
you know, people have a better time through these surgeries and whatever else, you know,
00:31:29.320
now that it's an epidemic of these people that are hooked, you know, it's one of the worst problems
00:31:34.940
in our country, as far as drugs are concerned is opioids. In fact, I just read a study yesterday
00:31:40.220
that's now the number one killer for people between the ages of 18 and 35, I think.
00:31:46.940
And it's, I mean, and it was a quote unquote, easier, better, faster solution, right. To the
00:31:54.260
problem of pain. And so it's created a whole new problem. And I think there's going to be problems
00:31:58.840
created. And like you said, there's going to be some good things created too. It's just going to
00:32:03.680
be important. I think for us to be anchored in reality so that we could decipher through the good
00:32:11.200
and the bad. Yeah. And, and, and our approach to COVID-19 is actually a perfect example of it.
00:32:17.520
Give me one, maybe there is, but, but the overall, I I've seen zero communication or promotion from
00:32:26.660
government officials or from the CDC that, Hey, by the way, this is probably a really good time
00:32:32.220
to get your health in check and to be healthier and do the more difficult thing because this
00:32:39.740
people may not like this. Guess what? If you're overweight, you are at higher risk of dying.
00:32:47.420
So suck it up. And you know what? You should probably get in better shape as a long-term strategy,
00:32:53.600
but you don't hear that, right? It's been almost two years. How many people have lost weight and
00:33:00.840
are in better shape because COVID was like, Hey, you know what? This thing's dangerous. And by the
00:33:05.080
way, I was reading something just the other day, the more obese you are increases your chances of
00:33:12.900
major complications from COVID. So if you're 50 pounds overweight versus a hundred pounds, the a hundred
00:33:17.900
pound individual has a higher risk. Like, so even losing partial weight and not being as obese could
00:33:25.680
actually highly benefit you, but yet no one talks about that. Why? Cause it's the hard thing to do,
00:33:30.640
right? Give me the easy pill, Sean. Give me the easy way out because God forbid we actually deal with
00:33:37.040
like the actual issue, right? Or something bigger. Everything has to be a fix. You know, it's a good
00:33:43.960
example. I was jujitsu hurt my wrist. This is probably like 10 years ago. Went to the doctor
00:33:49.800
did his x-ray and everything. He's like, you're fine. I think we just tore some tenons or whatever.
00:33:55.180
And I'm like, nothing we can do. And he's like, no, he's like, what's give you a, what's the shot
00:34:00.580
on it? Cortezone, right? Cortezone. Yeah. Let me give you that shot and it'll take away the pain.
00:34:08.880
You should be solid. And I'm like, well, hold on. So I won't feel the pain. And he's like, no
00:34:14.360
for about six months or so. I'm like, that's awesome. I go, is it going to like help heal
00:34:21.640
it better? And he's like, no, no, no. Just takes away the pain. And I'm like, yeah, but if I keep
00:34:26.760
training and I don't feel that pain in six months, it's probably going to be worse, right? Yeah. It's
00:34:33.720
going to be worse if you keep training. I'm like, yeah, yeah. Let me feel the pain. I'm okay with
00:34:39.860
that, right? Let me adjust. Let me train differently and let me know that I have an injury so I can
00:34:47.360
actually react appropriately and not make it worse, right? And it's like Ryan uses that analogy of the
00:34:54.540
gauges on your truck, right? It's like when the warning sign comes on, you don't go, ah, you know,
00:35:01.780
just turn that off, right? No, you're like, oh, I need to do something, right? So we want those
00:35:06.380
gauges. We want those little warning signs saying, hey, you know, rise up. And most difficult
00:35:12.480
situations are somewhat of an example of those warning signs on our gauges saying, hey, you need
00:35:18.400
to check the tire pressure or check the oil or whatever, or get gas. And we shouldn't ignore them,
00:35:26.000
but I don't know. Maybe I'm not holding on this too much. It's yeah, probably, but I agree.
00:35:35.300
All right. Carrick. Oh man. See, this is when you should be actually. Yeah. Carrick,
00:35:43.420
you know your last name. Carrick, alphabet M. I'm currently working in law enforcement and I
00:35:48.780
have found a lot of success. However, I want to move into a field where I can be my own boss
00:35:53.140
and have decided to open a gym with the hopes of expanding into my own jujitsu academy. When I get
00:35:58.880
my black belt, I'm in the process of interviewing local gym owners and management to learn where
00:36:04.280
they fell short and succeeded and et cetera. What are some other questions you would ask them during
00:36:08.780
this process? And what are some words of advice you may have going forward? Good question.
00:36:14.760
I would start with the business questions. And I think that's most people, I don't know if you've
00:36:23.100
ever read. Like accounting like stuff or what? Accounting as part of it, but just business in
00:36:32.100
general. Yeah. Maybe the accounting side of balance sheets and how those work, how they bill,
00:36:38.940
what works, what doesn't. Marketing, those sorts of things. I think that's overlooked. Most people
00:36:46.920
are looking for, how do you train? What do you teach? What do you kind of, there's a couple of
00:36:53.120
books that come to mind. I always go to books because it's where I'd learn most of my stuff in
00:36:57.240
business. I don't know if you're familiar. You're probably familiar with Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert
00:37:01.980
Kiyosaki. But his Cashflow Quadrant, the second book, the follow-up book to that is fantastic for
00:37:08.300
understanding what quadrant you're in. Most people that do what he's doing are going from the employee
00:37:14.380
quadrant to self-employed and they're not running, they're working. And then another book that comes
00:37:19.700
to mind is The E-Myth by Michael Gerber. I was going to suggest that one. Yeah.
00:37:23.460
Yeah. And too many people work in their business, not on their business. And so my advice would be to
00:37:30.300
try and work on the front end more on your business and understanding the business aspect,
00:37:35.960
your systems that you have in place for your teaching, your billing, your accounting, all of
00:37:41.660
that stuff. Work on the systems first and then work on the training aspect, the personality side.
00:37:50.380
And I think most people start with their personality, the training, just trying to get more people
00:37:58.260
in their quote unquote success of growth in that way. And they overlook the business side and that's
00:38:06.060
what buries most of them. Yeah. I totally agree. The only thing I'd add is I had a buddy of mine that
00:38:16.460
wanted to open a martial arts gym for a long time. And Carrick, I don't know if you're thinking the same
00:38:24.140
thing, but I think you can use this analogy multiple ways. But he was so set on, I need a brick and
00:38:33.100
mortar gym and I need this business plan. I need this big loan. And I have to have this whole thing
00:38:40.560
done first and then have students. And it goes back to minimal viable product. If you want to test a
00:38:49.260
market, as an example, maybe, let's say you're thinking about opening a gym in a particular
00:38:56.820
regional area, go to the rec center and sign up to teach classes at the rec center around fitness
00:39:05.080
first. Validate that you have a client base in that area. Get five clients first, right? If you're
00:39:11.780
open to martial arts again, I've seen gym owners originally like rent gym space in an actual gym,
00:39:20.360
lay down their mats before class and have a class and confirm that you even have a client base in
00:39:25.940
that region or in that location that there's even a need for. So try not to get wrapped up in this
00:39:31.200
whole, like, I have to have this brick and mortar school. I have to have all these things in place
00:39:35.460
and get major debt to be able to, like, then have a gym. There are strategies and ways that you can
00:39:42.400
pull it off, right? And it's everything from you subleasing an area and teaching privates to you
00:39:48.780
working at another gym first as a trainer so you can, you know, learn the ropes and see what works.
00:39:55.420
Like, there's a lot of different ways that you can have that minimal viable product. So I would
00:39:59.220
investigate that and make sure that you're not wrapped up in this idea that you have to have this
00:40:03.740
picture-perfect scenario before you can actually start business. And I would argue that do it now.
00:40:11.720
Like, I know you're in law enforcement, but start now. Like, start figuring that out now. Not
00:40:15.940
studying and coming up with paper, like, actually get in the market and actually start working at a gym
00:40:20.860
or start doing privates or whatever you need to do to start working now. Anything else you'd add,
00:40:27.180
Sean? No. That's right. Because that was some good, no, I'm just joking. Real good. Yeah.
00:40:33.640
All right. Scott, Luchin, Bill, a component of protecting your family is the ability to take
00:40:40.160
care of them medically in an emergency. Aside from standard CPR training, what other emergency
00:40:46.120
medical training would you recommend one should know? Are there any courses or programs you would
00:40:51.200
suggest? Oh, I think everybody should know basic CPR, right? I mean, that's a major one.
00:40:59.720
Um, and tourniquet application and have them access to one. Um, I think those are the majors that
00:41:10.520
personally, um, yeah. CPR, how to keep someone's heart going, stop bleeding, stop bleeding on the major
00:41:20.720
end of things. Uh, and, um, maybe into splinting, but that's, I think secondary still, I think it's
00:41:32.160
easy to rabbit hole this one and get over complicated and too in depth. Personally. I think
00:41:37.560
if you're proficient in CPR and tourniquets, I think that's a great base and you can feel confident in
00:41:46.760
that. Yeah. And Scott, if you're looking to take this step further, dude, there's tons of options,
00:41:51.220
right? Asia, my wife and I, we felt like we lacked in this area. Um, so we took, um,
00:42:00.260
oh my goodness. What's the freaking term, uh, EMT training six months. Um, we had classes two,
00:42:09.940
two hour classes a week for six months. And I mean, the amount of data you learn that's going
00:42:17.520
in trying to become an EMT is actually like crazy. It was actually really fun. It was funny to be in
00:42:24.400
the class, right? Because they're like, the teacher had everyone introduce themselves. Like,
00:42:28.180
why are they here? Oh, I'm becoming a firefighter or I want to become a paramedic. And, and we're like,
00:42:33.180
we're just here to learn, you know, but it was, it was super cool. And so, I mean, Scott, I mean,
00:42:42.620
if you want sign up for EMT training or the other thing that you might want to consider is
00:42:48.080
emergency first responder training. Uh, a lot of, um, junior colleges and cities actually offer like
00:42:56.920
first responder training. It's not as in depth as EMT, but it's like, you know, emergency response,
00:43:02.860
like in the moment, you know, and there's even wilderness versions of those, which are super
00:43:06.940
cool. Um, so I, I would hop on and, and, and dive into those. So, but I agree like from a first
00:43:14.180
glance perspective, right. It's about oxygen flow right to the brain, which is really through the
00:43:20.800
heart, right. Uh, airway and stop bleeding, right. Those are all, you know, kind of the three things
00:43:27.340
that are constantly the focal point. So. Yeah. Let me ask you this. How many,
00:43:32.540
how many scenarios did they talk about that you'd never thought of before? Oh my gosh. Of course.
00:43:38.240
Crazy. Yeah. Crazy. Like you didn't even know it could happen to people. Right. Yeah. Yeah. And
00:43:44.680
it was kind of funny though. Like I really do feel Sean that, um, they give you a lot of information,
00:43:51.780
right. But the treatment for everything is kind of like the same process, right? Like same base.
00:43:58.200
Yeah. Same assessment process. Yeah. Like the assessment process is exactly, almost exactly the
00:44:03.880
same. And, and you dive into a lot of even, uh, what certain drugs use for what or whatever, but
00:44:09.960
most of the assessment process is kind of the same, right. And you're checking the same things
00:44:15.160
every single time. Check for breath, check for pulse. Yep. Yep. Yep. Exactly. So, um, but it was,
00:44:21.460
in fact, I've even thought about going through again, just as a precursor. And in fact, we even
00:44:27.440
thought about, um, volunteering in like a small town or something. Um, so we can, can do right
00:44:36.800
alongs and, and just kind of get more experience as part of the process. So, uh, there's a lot,
00:44:42.100
there's lots of options. Yeah. You can take, I did a course with some Navy SEALs. There's like,
00:44:46.400
they have these tactical courses you can take and they're, they're kind of like, like you said,
00:44:49.960
maybe wilderness driven, uh, you know, whatever emergency type things where you'll learn different
00:44:56.400
things, how to shoot, how to, you know, take care of, of wound care assessment, you know,
00:45:02.000
in, in bad situations. And there's, those courses are out there. I mean, typically, you know,
00:45:07.080
but obviously you gotta have the money and the time to go do them, but you could go to like a three
00:45:11.500
or four day course like that. And the base you'll build in those three or four days is substantial.
00:45:16.840
Yeah. Yeah, for sure. All right. Jared Lawrence. Um, how do you, um, how do you find the difference
00:45:24.100
between contentment and complacency? My employer wants to promote me and I'm hesitant because I
00:45:29.420
really enjoy my current position. I feel like I would excel at the higher position and would make
00:45:33.800
a lot more, but it's a lot more responsibility could potentially take time away from family church
00:45:39.440
hobbies that I enjoy, et cetera. Trying to decide if I'm reluctant just because I am comfortable.
00:45:46.200
This, uh, I, I actually saw this question and then I, I, somebody answered that question.
00:45:52.160
Yeah. Well, no, it wasn't added. I, what actually stood out to me is somebody answered it in there
00:45:57.280
and they said, Oh no, it's not that it's neither one. It's just, you know, maybe your, your priorities,
00:46:02.380
you know, or, or what you're looking at. And, and so like my answer would be, it depends on what you
00:46:08.480
want, you know, and for some people, they just want that nine to five. They want to have their time.
00:46:14.380
They want to watch their football. They want to have like that quote unquote balance and they feel
00:46:19.240
good about that. And I'm not saying it's good or bad or wrong or anything else. Um, but for me
00:46:24.620
personally, I look at contentment and complacency as the same thing because I'm every day looking at
00:46:33.280
what more can I do to achieve my purpose? You know, and for me, my purpose has been to serve people,
00:46:42.180
to make a positive impact in people's lives. And, um, you know, we were, we were doing a family night
00:46:48.340
last night and we were going through, um, you know, in our church, there's something called the family,
00:46:54.360
the proclamation of the world. And we were going through that and we were looking at it. And at
00:46:57.400
the end, it says, I have it right here, actually. Um, it says, we call upon responsible citizens and
00:47:03.540
officers of government everywhere to promote these measures designed to maintain and strengthen the
00:47:07.960
family as the fundamental, fundamental unit of society. And so we had this conversation with our
00:47:14.080
kids that every business we have is a means to that end. So everything we do, like I have a
00:47:21.740
financial services businesses, it's our goal for that is to help and serve families, right? We have
00:47:27.700
this motto we call no family left behind, um, for that. Um, we have another company, uh, um, called
00:47:35.080
happy and strong where that's it's coaching for couples to help them find this balance that we're
00:47:41.340
talking about, right. And how to manage it. Um, we, we have, my wife just wrote a book, you know,
00:47:48.080
with that end in mind. And all of these sayings are now we don't have to do any of it. And, you
00:47:54.280
know, as I say this stuff and I'm not saying this to brag or anything, I don't want people to take
00:47:57.960
this wrong way, but like, I've been in a position where, you know, we make seven figures and have
00:48:02.760
been making seven figures since I was like 30 years old. Right. I'm 44 now. And so financially,
00:48:08.800
we've been financially independent for a long time. Um, but that's not for me enough because it's not a
00:48:16.540
money thing. It's not, and we have these other businesses. Are they going to make us a lot of
00:48:21.000
money? Do they make us money? Yeah. In most people's opinions, they make us a massive amount
00:48:25.400
of money, but we didn't start them. We don't do them to make the money. It's to serve people and
00:48:31.600
help them. And all it did was create extra work for me. And I found myself in a, in a plateau a few
00:48:37.340
years ago. That's how I actually came across the IC and order a man and, and, you know, ended up
00:48:44.140
meeting Ryan and talking to him as I got involved in the IC and it landed me here, um, for the
00:48:50.460
intention of wanting to serve the mission of reclaiming and restoring masculinity. Cause I,
00:48:56.840
I feel strongly enough of about the importance of that in our homes and in our communities
00:49:02.640
to be involved. And somehow it landed me here. Right. But it's those intention. If I had just stayed,
00:49:09.260
you know, a couple of years ago on that plateau, would I be fine? Would I be happy? Yes. But in the
00:49:16.420
back of my mind, there'd be this inkling of, I know I can do more. And the way I figured that out
00:49:21.340
for myself is I felt like I was just going through the motions. That makes sense. And so anytime I find
00:49:27.280
myself just going through the motions, showing up, waking up and being like, okay, did today feels
00:49:32.580
like yesterday, personally, I've, I've made myself feel like I'm doing something wrong. Right. And I
00:49:39.160
have this motto I've, I've, I've built into myself through affirmations that I, I do hard things first
00:49:47.340
and I'm the first to do hard things. It's one of the things that I tell myself every day. And so if I
00:49:52.780
don't find myself doing hard things, getting out of my comfort zone, not being complacent, not, you know,
00:49:59.400
any of those things, then personally, I feel like I'm doing it wrong. Okay. Now, do I feel stretched
00:50:05.660
where it's unmanageable? No, because I have systems in place to help me manage it. Right. And then I,
00:50:12.460
what I can catch myself and reel myself in and whatever else take breaks when I need them.
00:50:17.580
But that's been the last 20 years of working on that. And so everybody's different, you know,
00:50:23.180
where that's my pursuit, but someone could be listening to this like, Holy crap, that guy's crazy.
00:50:28.700
Right. And they could just be like, I just want a nine to five. I want someone to tell me what to do
00:50:32.820
all day long, go get that job done. And then when I'm home, I want to go be my family guy,
00:50:37.680
the guy in my church. I want to serve my community, whatever it is, you know, and not to say you can't
00:50:42.240
do those things both ways. Yeah. But it comes down to what's important to you. Right. At the end of
00:50:48.820
your life, let me end with this at the end of my life. I've also had my affirmations. I will not get to
00:50:54.320
the end of my life and say, I wish I would have dot, dot, dot. And every day I remind myself of
00:51:00.560
that. And so if there's anything through the day where I feel like I'm not achieving that end or
00:51:05.900
on the path to achieving that end, then I get to work. I get uncomfortable. I push myself to do more.
00:51:12.660
And so, you know, if you need to gauge it on that, if you can get to the end of your life and be
00:51:16.780
perfectly happy with, you know what? I had this job. I stayed at this company for 40 years. I was a good
00:51:21.440
father. I was a good husband. I helped in my community and my church. I watched a lot of
00:51:25.840
football. I did, you know, and I felt good about it. You win. Awesome. Yeah. Yeah. I think in summary,
00:51:33.460
what I'm hearing you say, Sean, is really the answer is self-assess, right? Why aren't you
00:51:41.760
wanting to take on the new position? Is it because of a priority? Is it because you are thinking like
00:51:47.200
no one knows this, but you, right? On whether you're just doing it to be comfortable. And for
00:51:53.020
most people, I think the one thing I'd add to what you're saying, Sean, is determine the priority and
00:52:00.220
then determine the cost you're willing to pay. Yes. No one ever does that. And it drives me mad,
00:52:06.980
right? And the easiest example is next time you're in a conference meeting, pause the meeting, go,
00:52:12.340
okay, who all wants to become a millionaire and everyone will raise their hand. Yeah. And the
00:52:18.320
answer, and that's bullshit. No, not, not everyone wants to be one. Why? Because they haven't paused
00:52:24.360
and said, oh, what's the cost or what do I have to do to go there? And I actually think that most people
00:52:31.520
would then go, oh, you know what? No, Sean, I don't want to, right? I don't want to pay the price.
00:52:37.780
I don't want to work that hard. I don't want to do these things. But ironically,
00:52:41.340
look at the mindset of that. Look, look at what that does psychologically for people when they go,
00:52:48.080
oh, I want, in this example, I want to become a millionaire. And their whole life is, I want,
00:52:53.380
I want, I want, but yet they're never willing to do the work. It's so much more powerful to actually
00:52:59.940
sit down and go, oh, what's the price to become, to make millions and go, oh, you know what? No,
00:53:06.960
I'm not willing to pay that price. How refreshing that is. Now you're not going after something that
00:53:13.440
you know you don't want to go after. So I think the clarity of what you want, the priority and the
00:53:20.700
price that you want to pay to get there is the complete thought and then decide, you know, and
00:53:26.940
some of us aren't, you know, I know I have people in my life that I love dearly that
00:53:32.740
family is so important. They're not willing to pay a price to work even a nine to five.
00:53:40.040
And that's awesome. Right. And they feel fulfilled about it. Right. And so just get clear,
00:53:45.160
right. Why you're doing certain things and what the associated prices.
00:53:48.960
And with that, it's right down the price of both, right? The price, if I do it,
00:53:53.500
and then the price if I don't. Right. And what that's going to feel like and how you want to feel,
00:53:58.200
right. Kind of look 10 years, 20 years out where that might place you and whatever you think is
00:54:03.620
going to put you in a position where you're going to feel best about that. That's where you go.
00:54:08.580
Yeah. I like that. All right. Rapid fire on this one. Cause I think we could probably rat
00:54:12.580
hole on this one a little too far. So Andrew Barry, what do you think the world would be like in 40
00:54:16.820
years? Oh, geez. Who knows? Right. I mean, it's whatever you thought it was going to be like 20 years
00:54:24.000
ago. It's probably totally different now. Yeah. You know, I mean, think 40 years back and the
00:54:28.880
world's dramatically changed. You know, I was, I was on a, on a call with a group of men, you know,
00:54:34.920
there's probably like 60 of us on the call. And I asked the question on the call if, if the men on
00:54:41.400
that call thought that racism was worse today than it was, you know, 40, 50 years ago. And it was
00:54:48.860
interesting because on that call, there's probably, I'd say 40%, 30 to 40% of the guys on the call
00:54:56.040
were black. You know, we had a lot of Latinos, you know, some white guys. So like white guys
00:55:02.800
weren't the majority and but majority of people thought it was better. There was a couple that
00:55:07.660
thought it was worse. And all I thought was that that just depends on what they're paying attention
00:55:11.940
to. Right. What they're watching most of the time, but most thought it was better. So I think
00:55:16.240
from that standpoint, like I personally think it's going to continue to get better. You know,
00:55:21.800
I look at my kids, they don't have, you know, like my sons, their friends are, I mean, in our
00:55:28.120
neighborhood, they're, they're Asian, they're Indian, they're black, they're Hispanic, they're
00:55:32.280
white, like their friends are such a good mix, you know, where we live anyways. And, and they don't
00:55:38.100
talk about their friends like, Oh, this is my black friend. This is my Asian friend. This is my,
00:55:42.100
you know, they're just their friends. Right. And I grew up that way too, where I live.
00:55:46.040
I was a minority in the, in the neighborhood I grew up or the neighborhoods that I grew up in.
00:55:50.920
And, um, you know, so it's like, I'm not racist in any way because I didn't grow up with it. Did
00:55:55.580
I have people in my family that were, yeah. Right. And it's that older generation. I think we're
00:55:59.820
losing that. Right. And so, um, I think that's going to continue to get better the more and more,
00:56:04.880
especially in the U S that we become mixed. Right. Like everyone looks at me and assumes I'm just
00:56:09.520
white. Right. But I'm actually Mexican. You know, my last name is Villalobo. So it's, but I'm not
00:56:14.460
like, if you want to say I'm like a quote unquote real Mexican, right. Like, which is how funny we
00:56:18.780
put those labels on it. Yeah. Or my heritage. Yeah. Or what heritage you decide to latch onto.
00:56:24.480
But I always find that's funny too. It's like, Oh yeah. Like, and it's not negative, but my wife
00:56:30.100
will say she's Hawaiian. Well, why don't you say you're Norwegian? Because you're probably more
00:56:35.120
Norwegian than Hawaiian. It's like, it's funny. That's my dad. My dad's very Mexican, you know,
00:56:41.400
very Mexican looking and he hasn't latched on to like being Mexican because of his, the way he grew
00:56:47.300
up with more racism and, you know, that kind of stuff too. Yeah. Um, you know, and so I think that
00:56:52.480
part will be better. I think there's some things like you mentioned the meta verse and like, that's
00:56:57.400
something we can't even fathom, I think at this point. And, uh, I'll kind of leave it with this
00:57:02.800
because like you said, the rabbit hole, I think of when I got my first iPhone, um, my sister was,
00:57:10.040
was graduating coast guard basic. We flew out to Maine. Um, and I had my first iPhone. We actually
00:57:18.240
flew into, I forget what it was. Like, I think it was New Jersey or something like that. No, not
00:57:22.860
New Jersey, Atlantic city. Okay. So we fly into Atlantic city and, um, and we're, you know, we didn't
00:57:30.480
book a hotel. My mom loves doing this. Like she's, she, or loves doing this where she just like,
00:57:36.340
let's go on an adventure. Let's go. Let's not plan it. Let's just go. Right. And so we land and I had
00:57:41.260
my first iPhone. I'm like, well, let's see what this thing can do. And we're driving. First, I put
00:57:45.280
in the driving directions to the city on the way we book a hotel, which I'd never done before. Right.
00:57:50.960
And I'm flipping out. I'm like a little kid. Like, Oh, I felt like James Bond. I literally kept
00:57:54.880
saying, this is like James Bond stuff. Right. Like I booked a hotel. We booked a, uh, uh, uh,
00:58:00.940
meal at Morton steakhouse for that night, you know, and all of these things that like literally
00:58:06.820
a month earlier, I couldn't even fathom. Right. And now I have this thing in the palm of my hand
00:58:12.300
that makes me feel like I'm James Bond. It's like stuff you used to watch in the movies.
00:58:16.240
And so, like I've mentioned ready player one 40 years from now, that could be what it's like.
00:58:21.480
I don't know. Right. It's yeah. It's like all this stuff they said would happen has, and then some,
00:58:26.120
except for the flying cars. The only thing we don't have right now, the flying cars,
00:58:30.080
like if you look at the things they used to print when we were kids, um, you know, but I think
00:58:36.380
socially, I don't know. I think the polarization that we have right now will figure itself out over
00:58:42.300
the next 40 years. Hopefully that's my, that's kind of the optimism in me. I think, you know,
00:58:46.800
the racism stuff, all of these things that are polarizing and starting to pull us apart. I think
00:58:51.320
we're going to figure out at some point, actually it is better. We've been fooling ourselves. Let's focus
00:58:56.640
on that. Right. And move forward with it. Um, and, uh, and then socially, I don't know if we'll
00:59:03.480
become more polarized, you know, or, or not, but again, I'm hoping it works itself out. Maybe it
00:59:09.560
gets bad for a little while. And then 40 years from now, we're going to pull ourselves back in
00:59:13.120
where it's, uh, it's better than it was. Right. Yeah. So yeah. Yeah. Well, you could go a lot of
00:59:18.940
different directions with it, but when I think 40 years out, I'm just thinking like that at the base,
00:59:23.760
it's the core of what we're teaching. And that's why I think this movement is so important,
00:59:26.560
right? Cause if we can restore masculinity, we're teaching her to kids, we can strengthen our homes
00:59:31.200
in these things and teach correct principles. I think the rest will figure itself out, you know,
00:59:37.420
and how we navigate and communicate it. Yeah. I like it. All right. Last question. As I have a 10 30,
00:59:44.840
I'm sure you might as well. So, um, Corey Brumwell, what about the LDS religion keeps you involved?
00:59:52.640
Do you want me to go first or either way? I can go first. It's, it's, I am a convert,
00:59:58.980
uh, to the church. And so I, my wife and I got baptized in 02, um, together, which I didn't know
01:00:06.380
was a not normal thing back then. And, and, you know, now is, you know, hold on, hold on, hold on,
01:00:10.880
hold on. So, so she, she's a convert as well. She's a convert as well. We both investigated the
01:00:16.320
church together and then got baptized and got baptized together. Yeah. And, uh, and we investigated
01:00:24.020
a lot of different churches. And so what made me want to be a part of the church? Number one,
01:00:29.600
I grew up in a household that was non-religious. If you ask my mom, even to the day she died,
01:00:34.480
she said she was Catholic and I don't know. Yeah. She probably doesn't remember the last time she
01:00:38.820
went to a mass, right? Yeah. My mom was Catholic as well. Yeah. And so I grew up that way. My dad was
01:00:44.500
anti-organized religion. He says he believes in God, but he doesn't like organized religion
01:00:49.380
because he had a bad experience with the Catholic church when I was a kid trying to get me baptized
01:00:53.420
as a, as a kid. And so it was, I didn't grow up in a religious family and then had a dad who was
01:00:59.260
like, Oh, you don't need church. And so, um, I eventually started to feel like I needed that part
01:01:05.740
in my life, especially learning success principles. Everybody talks about strengthening your faith and
01:01:10.980
your family, you know, and those things. And so I didn't have that part and wanted it.
01:01:16.120
So let me interrupt you really quick. Cause I, it's funny. We don't talk about religion too often on,
01:01:22.420
on the podcast. I mean, we kind of do. And, and for you guys that think that we never do,
01:01:27.060
you're just blinded by the idea that principles transcend religions and, and, uh, you know, truth is
01:01:34.480
truth. Right. So, but, but I would, I would, uh, as I give this back over to you, Sean, I would
01:01:40.720
challenge anybody that's might be checked out a little bit like, Oh, well, I'm not LDS. So why do
01:01:45.420
I care? Because there's truth in, in this con in this question, whether it's, whether you're Catholic,
01:01:54.440
whether you're Baptist, whether you're Hindu, whether you're Muslim, it doesn't matter. Right.
01:02:00.320
So find truth in, in what Sean's saying. Sorry, Sean, go ahead. No. And, and that that's perfect
01:02:05.800
segue to what I was just about to say. It's everything I learned. I didn't learn from the
01:02:11.300
Bible that, that wanting to have that part of my life field. It actually came from the book,
01:02:15.900
think and grow rich by Napoleon Hill. So here's a book that's trying to make you wealthy quote unquote,
01:02:21.420
right. And, and the main principle of saying in there is that you need to be led by a higher power.
01:02:26.140
You need to have that part of your life, um, there to really do something significant, um,
01:02:31.560
and meaningful in your life. And so I was searching for that, didn't know what it was. Um, and going to
01:02:37.180
different churches, nothing felt right. And when we went, the first time we went to a church meeting
01:02:42.500
was something they call state conference, which is basically like six or seven congregations coming
01:02:47.280
together in an area. And they had these different speakers. Um, literally the, like a guy, they call an
01:02:54.160
area authority come in, which is like this great speaker. Everyone's excited to hear.
01:02:57.800
And what got me was a 16 year old kid that got up there. And, and all he did was give a talk for
01:03:03.880
like five minutes. And all I could think about was who and how I was at 16 years old compared to this
01:03:11.160
kid. And here I am in a new marriage. I'd gotten married earlier that year to my wife. We're looking
01:03:16.940
to fill this part of our life, obviously thinking about our future and children and those sayings.
01:03:21.000
And both of our upbringings were awful from a standpoint of the environment we're in,
01:03:26.700
you know, what we saw, you know, the, the, just, it was awful. And, uh, and I thought,
01:03:32.620
Holy smokes, this kid at 16 is a better man than I am now is honestly what I, the thought that I had.
01:03:40.960
And I'm like, I want to raise kids in this environment. And it was the first time I had seen
01:03:46.540
that any church environment. And so I wasn't being taught by like some pastor that had gone
01:03:53.000
to school to learn how to get you to believe this stuff. Right. And, and so, um, from there
01:04:00.720
went in, started learning more and honestly tried to poke holes in it, tried to find things that
01:04:05.740
didn't make sense. Um, couldn't everything led to my life being better, me being happier,
01:04:12.160
us growing a family healthier in that environment. And I didn't have like a pure testimony,
01:04:20.120
you know? And so as the question, back to the question, what keeps you involved?
01:04:24.560
It was everything made sense that it, if I applied these principles, they were going to improve my
01:04:29.780
life and the lives of the people around me. Um, and I mentioned that means to the end and serving
01:04:35.140
people and, you know, and making their lives better. So I saw that happening through those principles.
01:04:39.840
And then I was, I didn't realize how deep I was in till I gained that testimony where I knew it was
01:04:48.320
true was probably about five to six years in. Yeah. And it was through doing the work, being in the
01:04:54.440
church, having a calling. I was actually, you know, helping the missionaries at the time.
01:04:59.300
And I got this affirmation without a doubt that I knew it was true of the spirit telling me it was.
01:05:05.080
And from that point forward, then the stuff that was making my life better, then I couldn't deny it,
01:05:11.160
you know? And so any doubts sent me back to that. Um, and I'll leave with this last thought. I heard
01:05:17.280
Joe Rogan on a, on a podcast talking about, he thought of a friend, he had a dream about a friend
01:05:21.660
and, uh, that he hadn't seen in a long time. And he, and he called him. And then when he called him,
01:05:26.580
the guy, you know, mentioned how he needed that call, you know, and, and how he was in a bad spot in
01:05:32.240
his life. And it really made a difference in his life. And Joe was talking about like,
01:05:35.940
we have this connection and I can't explain it, you know, but I knew I just had to call. I had
01:05:41.840
to make that connection. I just knew it without any other way to explain. Like I was, I'm universally
01:05:46.660
tied to that guy somehow. And, um, you know, that's what that prompting by the spirit was for me.
01:05:53.220
Like, if somebody asked me, why do you go, why do you, what about this? What about this? They believe
01:05:57.860
this, you know, and whatever else it is always from this point forward, going to go back to
01:06:02.320
that undeniable truth. That's been whispered to me that I felt more than I heard. Right. And,
01:06:08.540
and then if I want to think of it from like a, a tangible standpoint are the look at the fruits,
01:06:16.820
right? Are the fruits good? Are the principles being taught? Are you a better man? Yeah. Am I going
01:06:22.580
to be a better man, better husband? Am I going to make a deeper and more meaningful impact in my
01:06:27.280
community? And I can check yes to all of those. Then it's, I'm going to keep going.
01:06:32.900
Yeah. Copy. Well, and, and, and for you guys, I actually didn't know Sean was LDS until
01:06:39.080
actually this call. So, which is quite funny actually. Yeah. Well, you know, I get the same
01:06:45.540
thing actually, like when, um, when people are like, you're Mormon, what you're not a normal one.
01:06:51.080
You know what I mean? What's a more, what's a normal one? I don't even understand. Um,
01:06:56.640
just a thought that, that come to mind and maybe we wrap up the question this way. So,
01:07:01.680
uh, in the iron council, uh, which is our kind of our exclusive brotherhood, we, this month we're,
01:07:08.440
we're covering a man's search for meaning from Viktor Frankl and, um, and this quote come. Yeah.
01:07:15.220
Such a great book, such a great book. And, um, this, this quote, you showed up in my feed,
01:07:22.720
um, just the other day and I wanted to pull it up and share it because I think it, it, it talks about
01:07:28.100
the value of, in this context, the value of religion. Um, now, if you're a non-religious
01:07:35.580
person, fair, read this or listen to this quote and then ask yourself, what are you doing? And the,
01:07:41.980
and the quote reads when a person can't find a deep sense of meaning, they distract themselves
01:07:47.640
with pleasure and, and really think about what's the ultimate deep sense of meaning. Um, this past
01:07:56.980
week we were, I was in Cancun with Ryan and, and, uh, Mansfield was down there with us in Cancun.
01:08:03.660
One of his books, uh, Mansfield's book of manly men. I I I'm going to slaughter the title of something
01:08:09.960
like that. He talks about in one of his chapters about men getting present with their divine nature
01:08:20.200
and, and my translation or my interpretation of that is something greater than yourself that,
01:08:30.880
that you have a higher purpose. Right. And, and for those that believe in religion and you actually
01:08:36.040
believe that you're maybe a son or a daughter of God and that's your divine nature. Holy crap.
01:08:44.600
That gives you meaning. Yeah. Right. And Sean, what I heard from you today, it's like, Hey,
01:08:49.740
you've even created meaning, right? You've, you've consciously said, Hey, you know what? We're going to
01:08:54.680
start these businesses. And, and, and the focal point of these businesses is to keep the family unit up front.
01:09:00.500
To have families succeed, right. To help marriages succeed. That is a greater meaning. And, and that's
01:09:08.620
one of the aspects in generally speaking, not that it's requirement, but that's one of the benefits of
01:09:13.720
religion is a greater purpose and meaning and how, and, and I can't help, but look at my own children
01:09:21.620
and think how much better are they in a position to live this life when this life is not about pleasure
01:09:31.580
and not just about excitement, but it's about something greater than themselves, that there's a higher
01:09:40.080
purpose to life. What an amazing way to live life. And so if it's not religion for you, then figure out that
01:09:49.700
greater meaning, whatever that is. Now, don't get me wrong. I think life is meant to be enjoyable too,
01:09:57.380
right? We're supposed to enjoy the process. And we, we kind of talked about this earlier about like, Hey,
01:10:01.720
some of the toughest times in life were the most enjoyable and rewarding, right? Fulfillment is a
01:10:07.080
common term that we use on the podcast, right? It's excitement and happiness versus fulfillment.
01:10:11.520
And I would argue that meaning in life and feeling like living a life of no regret is a life of
01:10:21.660
fulfillment, not necessarily excitement and having a deeper meaning to why we are here or add or creating a
01:10:30.140
deeper meaning to why we are alive is, is ultimately where we find fulfillment, joy, peace, and happiness.
01:10:38.020
Um, and ultimately we'll end up on our desk beds. I think looking back and not regretting our time
01:10:43.280
that we had, um, I don't know. And it has to feel right for you. And I think that's the thing,
01:10:52.060
like I tell people all the time, they're like, well, what church do I go to? And I mean, on a weekly
01:10:56.340
basis, I get asked that and I said, you know what, you need to go to some and figure it out and find out
01:11:02.340
what makes the most sense for you. You could come to ours. Great. Come with us. But then,
01:11:07.260
you know, simultaneously don't just do that. In my opinion, I think you need to,
01:11:11.280
to investigate, right? Totally. And it comes back to commitment level,
01:11:15.880
not to go on a huge segue, but no, nothing ever got accomplished really well when you did it because
01:11:22.360
someone told, because Sean told you to versus your own desire and commitment to actually doing
01:11:28.160
something. Right. I mean, that's ultimately everything that we do. We should be bought into
01:11:32.700
whatever it is now or, and or if not question and go, why am I doing this? Right. And make sure
01:11:38.500
you also don't kind of, we've been talking about this the whole time. Too many people are looking
01:11:43.940
for it to be easy. Right. And that's the thing when you, when you, if you want to be a part of a
01:11:48.600
church or a religion or whatever it is, there's some commitments you're going to make. Um, and that's
01:11:53.460
important for all of us to be able to do commit and then follow through on those things.
01:11:57.840
And so if you're going about it, trying to find what's going to be the easiest for you,
01:12:01.300
I think that's the wrong way to go about it as well. Agreed. Agreed. Totally agree, man.
01:12:08.280
All right, man. I got a, I got a run. I got sales meetings and all kinds of work to do.
01:12:13.140
Well, I can expect we're going to see a spike like last time we were together.
01:12:16.780
For sure. For sure. And, and just to offend all those that would be easily offended,
01:12:21.000
Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. Happy new year.
01:12:24.060
And, um, yeah, I hope you guys have a, have a great week. We talked. Yeah. And we talked about
01:12:28.640
a few things, um, you know, iron council. So to learn more about the iron council, go to order
01:12:33.600
man.com slash iron council, get your swag, like Mr. Sean's hat at store.orderofman.com. And as
01:12:40.640
always make sure to follow Ryan. If you're not at on Insta, as well as Twitter at Ryan Mickler,
01:12:46.520
Sean, what's your handle? And then in the, Sean V M D S H A W N V M D. So copy. And then you can
01:12:56.340
connect with me at Kip Sorensen. That's E N Danish. No, none of the Swedish stuff. So Danish E N on the
01:13:03.180
Sorensen. So until let's see until Friday filled notes this coming Friday, uh, take action and become
01:13:12.140
the men you were meant to be. Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're
01:13:17.020
ready to take charge of your life and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join