Order of Man - May 02, 2025


When You Mess Up, Learn | FRIDAY FIELD NOTES


Episode Stats


Length

31 minutes

Words per minute

177.38385

Word count

5,507

Sentence count

2

Harmful content

Misogyny

3

sentences flagged

Hate speech

7

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Failure is an inevitable part of life, and we all have our share of it. In this episode, I share six things that I have learned from my own failures and setbacks over the years that have helped propel me forward in my life.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 you've made mistakes you've messed up you've done things you've said things you've acted in a certain
00:00:05.420 way you've screwed people over you've said mean things you've made mistakes i mean name it we've
00:00:11.520 done it all every single one of us i have so many things in my life so many things that i can't even
00:00:16.680 tell you one thing right now that i've done in my life where i have just absolutely failed i've made
00:00:21.960 a horrible horrible mistake and if i would have known better or would have been in a different
00:00:27.600 position i would have made a different decision failure is an inevitable part of life and i fear
00:00:35.460 that maybe in the past i've glossed over this or overlooked this or made it too simplistic or just
00:00:42.600 dismissed the fact that we're all confronted with failure in our life i've had so many different
00:00:48.120 failures as i'm sure everybody else has and i'm not here to compare woes or struggles or challenges or
00:00:54.920 anything like that by any means we all have our struggles that we're dealing with but i also
00:01:00.720 don't want to dismiss the fact that when you're in the throes of setback and heartache and heartbreak
00:01:07.400 and challenges and frustrations that it's just easy to fix whatever might be going on sometimes it just
00:01:14.960 takes time sometimes it's confusion and lack of answers and external factors that are beyond our
00:01:22.520 control that make it hard for somebody like me who loves to be in control to have the control that i desire
00:01:28.520 and if you're anything like me then you know how difficult that can be but the reality is it's going to
00:01:35.600 happen you're going to have setbacks you're going to lose a job you're going to make a dumb financial
00:01:41.800 decision you're going to get into business with the wrong person you're going to have a collapse of your
00:01:45.920 marriage or a relationship you're going to deal with medical situations and you're going to deal
00:01:53.400 with things that maybe i didn't describe but that just inevitably pop up maybe they're minor and maybe
00:01:59.080 they're major but regardless our ability as men to confront the issues that we deal with address them
00:02:08.000 head-on and ultimately learn from those failures and setbacks is what's going to determine whether or not
00:02:14.660 ultimately we will be successful in life financially relationally spiritually mentally emotionally
00:02:20.620 etc etc today i want to share with you six things that you can do today to ensure that you learn from
00:02:28.580 your failures one of the most common questions that i often get on our ask many things and over the past
00:02:34.560 decade of doing this now is uh how do i overcome fill in the blank you know maybe somebody lost a
00:02:41.900 relationship and they've been hung up on that woman for the past five six seven ten years
00:02:46.380 or they feel guilty or ashamed about the way that they may have performed in that relationship or
00:02:52.600 maybe it was at work or just in life in general and they're trying to overcome the guilt and the shame
00:02:58.580 of making bad decisions or doing things wrong or losing the person they care about or being financially
00:03:05.340 destitute and the only answer that i can give you on a broad sense is to learn from those experiences
00:03:11.120 that's all you can do at this point you can't go back in time you can't take back the words you may
00:03:16.660 have said you can't take back the actions that you may have engaged in you can't take back the mess ups
00:03:22.240 that you might have done all you can do is learn moving forward so i'm going to share six things with
00:03:28.640 you right now that in the wake of my own failures and setbacks over life that i have learned and extracted
00:03:34.860 from these from these failures to help propel me forward in my life so number one is complacency
00:03:41.580 kills now when i was in iraq in 2005 and 2006 there was a a board a wooden plywood board
00:03:52.520 at the front of the gate and it was green and the letters complacency kills were painted in red
00:04:01.300 on that board and as our soldiers and marines and everybody else left that base that was the last
00:04:08.400 thing they saw when they left the base to go out into the city or go on a convoy or wherever they
00:04:13.660 may have been going and when we read that sign like i said it said complacency kills in that context as in
00:04:21.700 literal death if if you're complacent and you just fall into old patterns or old habits or old beliefs
00:04:29.920 you're gonna die literally you're going to die now in our lives now outside of military or law 0.96
00:04:37.740 enforcement or some of these other professions the likelihood of you dying because uh you make a bad
00:04:43.380 financial decision are relatively low the likelihood of you dying uh because you had a breakdown in a
00:04:49.340 relationship are relatively low the likelihood of you dying because you got fired or because um you
00:04:55.420 know somebody's mad at you you went through a bankruptcy are relatively low so that's a good
00:04:59.720 thing but there's a spiritual death there's an emotional death there's there's the likelihood of
00:05:06.040 just losing a bit of your soul when things go wrong you know you start to question whether or not you did
00:05:12.840 things right and how you could have done them better and you question why things are the way they are
00:05:18.380 and maybe you feel like you know i got dealt a bad hand or life is unfair and there's there's these
00:05:24.100 externalities that are beyond my control and you believe that you're not going to be okay
00:05:30.500 and if you believe that then you're not going to be and that's the hard truth it's what you believe
00:05:39.180 if you believe that you're going to be okay you will but what i would suggest to you is before you
00:05:44.280 even get to the problem at hand is be very vigilant and aware of what might be happening
00:05:48.880 if you see the red flags at work and your boss is unhappy or unsatisfied or you see a bunch of clients
00:05:55.160 leaving you in droves those are some red flags if you feel like in your relationship that you're more
00:06:00.980 distant and disconnected than you've ever been those are red flags that's telling you that's a warning light
00:06:06.360 it's like the little warning light that comes on your dashboard in your vehicle saying
00:06:09.840 warning warning warning warning something's wrong something's off you need to pay attention to me to
00:06:15.360 this right now because if you don't you're dead again not probably in literal death but you're going
00:06:22.440 to suffer some real hardships and i know why we do it because we don't want to confront it right when
00:06:29.860 that engine light comes on that check engine light comes on in your vehicle you don't want to stop
00:06:33.700 everything you're doing and take it to the mechanic you have other things to do you're busy with work
00:06:38.620 and life and people and relationships and demands for this and demands for that you've got so much
00:06:43.100 going on and so you neglect it and you put it off and you think that it'll be okay
00:06:49.960 and in the background that problem is just metastasizing it's just getting worse and worse and worse
00:06:57.620 but you can't see the the symptoms of it yet and there will come a point in time where you will
00:07:05.240 you are literally marching maybe not literally but you are figuratively marching to a cliff
00:07:13.680 and unless you're willing to look at what the problem is or what the drop looks like or what that
00:07:18.680 gap represents you're not going to address it do not be complacent address things if your boss is
00:07:24.960 mad at you tackle it if you've lost a few clients call them and say hey not here to win you back just
00:07:31.460 here to figure out what went wrong if you have a relationship and it feels off or wrong or or
00:07:38.520 distant approach or hey i feel distant i feel disconnected i feel like something's off what do
00:07:44.120 we need to do here what's going on and be assertive if anything i think that's probably what largely
00:07:52.260 defines us as men when we see problems and challenges we tackle them we don't ignore them we don't bury our
00:07:58.760 heads in the sand and pretend they don't exist we tackle them head on ask yourself what conversations
00:08:03.800 do i need to have what red flags am i avoiding what medical issues am i dealing with that i haven't
00:08:08.880 addressed what client conversations do i need to have what kind of conversation do i need to have with
00:08:14.180 my boss so that i can make sure i stay vigilant and out ahead of the problems that might exist number two
00:08:19.820 externalities are rarely the problem all right if you have a crappy boss and that's a one-off
00:08:29.080 it's a one-off but if every boss you've ever had is a crappy boss then the only common denominator in
00:08:36.240 that equation is you if every romantic relationship you've ever had has been horrible and tragic and
00:08:42.160 ended in catastrophe and you're heartbroken and devastated you are the only person as a common
00:08:47.540 denominator in that equation if all of your clients are leaving you and going somewhere else
00:08:52.700 you are the common denominator it's you and we don't really want to look at that do we
00:09:01.840 we want to put it off on somebody else well the reason my relationship is because she fill in the 0.95
00:09:07.780 blank the reason i didn't get the promotion is because my boss fill in the blank the reason i got sued is
00:09:14.740 because he was a piece of fill in the blank the reason the economy is so horrible is because fill
00:09:22.240 in the blank and what i would suggest to you is your default answer should be the reason that
00:09:28.600 your personal finances aren't the way they need to be is because of you the reason that you didn't get
00:09:35.240 the promotion is because of you the reason that your relationship is breaking down is because of
00:09:40.560 you now i'm not telling you to ignore externalities i'm not telling you that it doesn't take two to
00:09:46.820 tango or that there aren't other people or other outside factors in the equation of course in a
00:09:51.680 relationship she has other ideas and visions and things that she wants to accomplish of course in a
00:09:59.620 relationship uh a um a business arrangement a boss might have ideas that are conflicting with yours and
00:10:07.440 the vision of the company might be different than your vision of the company of course you might get
00:10:12.580 diagnosed as my guest um last week hal elrod was diagnosed with a a life-threatening
00:10:20.680 cancer diagnosis i'm not here to tell you that it's his fault or his problem well it is his problem but
00:10:29.820 it's not his fault that that happened but what i am here to tell you is that the externalities are
00:10:36.460 rarely the actual problem what is actually the problem is the way you're operating it's your mindset
00:10:41.500 it's your behaviors it's your thoughts it's your actions and if you correct those things
00:10:47.100 then life will get better if you have a medical diagnosis then it's your responsibility to eat
00:10:55.000 properly fuel yourself correctly get the sleep and recover you need build strength so that you can
00:11:01.720 overcome that that diagnosis if you got the passed over for the promotion then it's your job to figure out
00:11:10.440 why you got passed over for the promotion even if it was something outside of your control and then
00:11:15.280 figure out what you can do better to influence a better decision for you and yours moving forward
00:11:19.860 if the relationship broke down or the marriage ended after 10 or 15 years and you don't want that
00:11:27.380 to have happen again then it's your responsibility to figure out how you could have done it differently
00:11:32.900 now that's not to say you can control other people but you certainly have more influence and power
00:11:38.780 over your situation than you believe and the only reason you might not be experiencing that is
00:11:45.220 because you're focused on the things you can control instead of the things that you can
00:11:49.480 all right number three when learning to let go when learning to overcome the guilt and the shame of past
00:11:57.180 mistakes and baggage and trauma and bullcrap and failures i would say this learn to build new and
00:12:04.740 let go of the old in fact what i would say is learn to build new better better what if instead of
00:12:14.640 thinking that the world is against you that that woman is against you or that boss is against you or
00:12:19.600 the economy is against you or the president hates you or this is like trying to conspire against you
00:12:25.300 you believed that nothing was conspiring against me and if anything it might be conspiring for me
00:12:31.260 but all i need to do is learn some skills learn how to communicate better learn how to show my love
00:12:39.720 affection better learn how to eat better learn how to fuel my body more effectively learn how to train
00:12:47.020 harder and more effectively learn how to reach out to clients learn how to ask for referrals learn how
00:12:53.400 to manage my money learn how to invest learn how to talk to my boss again i'm not telling you that
00:12:59.980 it's all within your control i want to be very clear on that because i've fallen into the trap thinking
00:13:04.920 that if i just do everything better then everything will work out in my benefit and that's not always
00:13:09.500 true i can do everything just perfect the best way i could i could ask a thousand of the the most
00:13:20.240 researched well-versed credible people in that arena and say what should i do and they could tell me you
00:13:25.920 know a hundred things and i could do all 100 of those things and it still might not work out
00:13:30.460 it still might not work out but you can build it better
00:13:37.840 you can let go of what's beyond your control and you can focus on what's within yours and then you
00:13:44.160 can increase the odds and that's my game i i could i could go work out till i'm blue in the face i could
00:13:52.500 eat the perfect nutrition plan i could put it all together i could do everything i get the sleep and
00:13:57.660 the stamina i could do all of it just right and tomorrow as i'm traveling to st louis for one of
00:14:03.400 our events i could get in a plane crash and die i could have a pain in my abdomen and going to the
00:14:12.840 doctor and he could tell me you have colon cancer and that that that's completely outside of my control
00:14:22.040 and yet we have to increase the odds right you have to increase the odds because what is the
00:14:28.960 alternative well i could get cancer anyway so i might as well just eat like a dump truck and
00:14:34.000 sit around on the couch like a fat pathetic loser the rest of my life well you you certainly have 0.63
00:14:40.120 the ability to do that but is that going to increase your odds of living a better life or is that going
00:14:44.880 to decrease your odds play the odds guys play the odds build a new life yeah she left yeah you got
00:14:55.460 fired yes you went through a bankruptcy yes you did something dumb and went to jail for three years
00:15:00.800 yes like fill in the blank with whatever you're going through yes yes all of that has happened to you
00:15:06.600 and yet you're not horrible and you're not broken and you're not crippled and you're not incapacitated
00:15:15.180 and you have the ability to grow and to get better and to be hopeful and optimistic when you wake up in
00:15:22.080 the morning i know what you're thinking because i think it too this is what i'm dealing with and we
00:15:26.740 think about the negative what if instead we said you know what here we go blood pumping through my veins
00:15:32.920 air coursing through my lungs yeah sure devastated about whatever i'm dealing with but you know what
00:15:38.660 i got more to do today i got a lot to do today i have new relationships to build i have old
00:15:45.580 relationships to mend i have business to to develop i have people to serve i have charities that i can help
00:15:53.760 i have money to make and you decided to focus on what is important and building a new kind of life for
00:16:01.020 yourself all right number four do not grow bitter and contentious and don't label i would add that as
00:16:08.180 well it's very easy when you have hardship in your life to think that this is just your lot in life
00:16:14.480 and that everybody or everything that you might be currently dealing with is conspiring against you
00:16:21.680 or is a piece of crap or is a loser or is horrible or whatever it is that you're telling yourself right 0.81
00:16:27.360 now and you start to compartmentalize but you also start to label and you put things into categories
00:16:32.180 so you might have a blow up with your boss and you might say oh i'm never gonna work for a boss again
00:16:38.020 because they're all just a bunch of assholes that's labeling or you have a breakdown in your 0.92
00:16:43.960 relationship and you think man she was she was this and she was that and i can't believe she did this 1.00
00:16:48.940 to me and so all women are fill in the blank that's labeling or you know every time this person gets 1.00
00:16:57.820 elected then i lose money and i that's labeling or all my clients are horrible because this one person
00:17:05.800 did this one thing and everybody's like this labeling don't do that don't grow bitter you have a choice to
00:17:12.480 make do you really believe that all bosses are that way do you really believe all women might be that
00:17:18.820 way do you really believe that everybody's out to get you or are you just saying that as a coping
00:17:24.580 mechanism for the catastrophe that you feel like you might be dealing with no not everybody's like that
00:17:31.200 we say it because it delegates responsibility to other people and i'm not saying that in a positive light
00:17:39.140 by the way but if she's the reason for your breakup then you don't have to take ownership of it if he
00:17:46.000 the boss or she the boss is the reason for you getting passed over for the promotion you don't have to
00:17:52.100 take responsibility of it and so now you can just be bitter and contentious and have frustration and
00:17:59.340 anxiety and ignore all the wonderful things all the new relationships all the new business partnerships
00:18:05.820 all of the other bosses who don't act like that who will actually serve you and who you want to serve
00:18:12.720 and who you want to be growing in life together personally professionally platonically romantically
00:18:19.600 there's so much abundance out there and yet we get so bitter and contentious
00:18:26.020 that we shut ourselves off to the possibility of the future there is a future for you and you know
00:18:33.000 you want to know how i know because you're here with me you're here today
00:18:37.640 and i want to ask you not even rhetorically how many hardships have you gone through in your life
00:18:44.880 serious hardships not like hey somebody was mad at my client called me he was mad at me i'm talking
00:18:50.280 about serious hardships half a dozen a dozen two dozen three dozen a hundred and yet you're still here
00:18:58.780 so what does that tell me what should that tell you
00:19:03.800 that the power and the stamina and the ability of a man who's committed to being better
00:19:13.500 can overcome tremendous adversity tremendous heartbreak tremendous setback and he can be better
00:19:23.400 if he chooses not to hang on to baggage longer than he ought to
00:19:28.800 some things aren't meant for you to carry some things you need to carry for a temporary period of
00:19:36.340 time and then you can let go of them
00:19:37.820 i remember years ago i was taking a group of young men they were between the ages of 14 and 16 years old
00:19:45.680 on a camp out and we hiked down into uh a ravine where there was a body of water it was a small lake
00:19:56.700 where we could jump in and cool off and if i remember correctly it's about 10 miles and then
00:20:01.700 we were going to camp out at the bottom of this ravine and then we're going to hike back up the next
00:20:04.800 day and the hike up was about seven miles to a cabin that a friend of mine owned and we're going to spend
00:20:09.820 the next two days at the cabin so they had to earn it they had to earn the cabin and we get down to the
00:20:14.600 bottom of the ravine that first afternoon and that's where we're going to make camp and we make
00:20:18.560 camp and long story short we wake up the next morning and i tell the boys hey it's time to get
00:20:22.520 up so they get up and we start packing up and we do a little breakfast and things like that and we
00:20:26.360 get the guys going and we start hiking and my bag felt unnecessarily heavy way heavier than it did
00:20:34.320 the day before and i remember thinking man this feels heavy but maybe i'm just tired and i'm hiking
00:20:40.660 and i'm hiking and i see the boys giggling at each other i'm like what are they giggling about and i
00:20:45.900 keep hiking and hiking and i can't remember how i came to the realization but maybe we stopped
00:20:50.500 for a break and i opened my pack and the boys at night had put a bunch of rocks in my in my bag
00:20:57.680 and i was bothered but also it was funny and i carried that thing for miles miles and mind you
00:21:06.320 at this point in my life i was not in the best shape and i was struggling and i was sweating and
00:21:13.240 heaving and god i just could not get it together and so i had all these extra rocks in my bag and i
00:21:19.020 you know yelled at the boys or whatever and it was all good fun so it was not that big a deal but i
00:21:23.020 took the rocks out and it was amazing how much lighter the rest of the trip was i think we had
00:21:27.180 another five or six miles to go and the reason i share that with you is because how many rocks are you
00:21:32.620 carrying in life how many past mistakes are you carrying around have you ever forgiven yourself
00:21:38.000 have you ever sat down and took the rocks out of your bag and said i don't want to carry this anymore
00:21:48.820 and let it down and forgave yourself and forgave other people and chalked up mistakes
00:21:58.520 to not knowing to not having the answers to not being as good as you could have been or that you
00:22:09.500 can be now and you consciously for the first time in your life decided you know what i'm not going to
00:22:15.840 carry that anymore i'm not going to be guilty i'm not going to be ashamed i'm not going to be embarrassed
00:22:23.540 i'm not going to be sad i'm not going to be sorrowful i'm going to rise above all of that
00:22:29.360 today starting right now i'm going to sit down i'm going to open my pack up i'm going to take all
00:22:33.900 those rocks down and i'm going to leave them exactly where they are so that i can move forward in
00:22:39.240 lightness being more light emotionally mentally physically and deciding that you can be better
00:22:46.140 than you are right now and you can but you don't need to carry the rocks forever
00:22:51.740 and you aren't some martyr and you aren't destined to carry shit that isn't yours to carry 0.80
00:22:58.960 and it doesn't even make you virtuous or righteous it makes you dumb and i'm not saying that to be rude
00:23:05.360 because i've done it too and i still do it but we're dumb when we carry rocks that aren't ours to
00:23:11.580 carry and we can't learn to take what doesn't belong in our pack out number what am i on number five
00:23:18.820 forgive yourself you've made mistakes you've messed up you've done things you've said things you've
00:23:25.800 acted in a certain way you've screwed people over you've said mean things you've made mistakes i mean
00:23:31.280 name it we've we've done it all every single one of us i have so many things in my life so many things
00:23:38.280 that i can't even tell you one thing right now that i've done in my life where i have just absolutely
00:23:43.400 failed i've made a horrible horrible mistake and if i would have known better or would have been in
00:23:52.080 a different position i would have made a different decision if i would have had more information if i
00:23:59.160 would have had more feedback if i would have known the consequence of those things that i engaged in
00:24:04.320 i would have done it differently but i didn't know i made the best decisions that i could
00:24:10.740 and now granted i know you're thinking i could have done better you could have done better with
00:24:16.380 the information that you have now right so you're in a relationship and maybe you mistreated her
00:24:22.020 um you could have done better
00:24:24.480 but that's basing past decisions on current information hindsight is 2020 you got passed over
00:24:34.880 for that promotion you thought man i could have done a better job at that interview absolutely you could
00:24:39.620 have with the beautiful blessing of having all the feedback that you need now but then in that
00:24:45.880 interview you didn't have that and so you did the best that you could and that's not to let yourself
00:24:52.980 off the hook by the way it's just to tell you you made a decision based on all of the factors at hand
00:24:59.840 all of your experiences and knowledge and baggage and bullshit and conversations and everything and you 0.85
00:25:08.240 made a decision and maybe you chose poorly okay now you have new information now you know better now
00:25:19.220 you're a better man and so at some point you just have to wash your hands and say that wasn't me
00:25:25.140 that was who i was
00:25:28.240 that was the way i was behaving then but that's not me today and so those are two different people
00:25:35.800 there's a quote that says no man steps in the same river twice for he is not the same man and it is
00:25:43.440 not the same river you are a different man today than you were yesterday are you better or are you
00:25:50.940 worse because there's only one of two that can be you're better than you were or you're worse and if
00:25:57.100 you're sitting around and you're sulking and you're wallowing in your self-pity and you're throwing
00:26:02.280 yourself a little pity party and you're trying to be a martyr for no good reason to be a martyr
00:26:07.060 then you're a worse man than you were yesterday if on the other hand you're willing to acknowledge
00:26:11.800 that you had some shortcomings and deficiencies but you learn these lessons and you're going to
00:26:17.220 apply them moving forward and here's how you're going to do it and here's what you're doing now
00:26:21.340 then you are better than you were yesterday and isn't that our goal the kaizen method one percent
00:26:28.140 better every day isn't that your goal better than who you were yesterday not better than me
00:26:33.820 or anybody else you might follow on social media better than yourself
00:26:37.700 forgive you were dumb you were ignorant you were stupid you were deceived you were manipulated 0.98
00:26:49.180 forgive yourself don't forgive yourself for what you're going to do next forgive yourself for what
00:26:56.220 you did before all right the last point that i wanted to make is make for you today is focus on
00:27:01.160 the controllables there's so much beyond our control and there's so much to worry about how
00:27:07.760 your boss responds how your clients respond how she responds how the market responds how who gets
00:27:14.160 elected president what the weather is going to look like what the economy is doing man it's never
00:27:20.980 ending it's it's literally never ending focus on you i often say make yourself the project
00:27:28.960 and i've also said fix yourself first before you start worrying about anybody else or anything else
00:27:34.660 or what everybody else is doing what the market's doing or what the president is doing or what the
00:27:37.840 this is doing or what that is doing fix yourself go to bed on time feel your body correctly
00:27:45.440 surround yourself with good people exercise learn how to communicate learn skills that you need for
00:27:51.680 your job engage with new people create new hobbies and activities and interest and get better than
00:27:58.080 you were before you can do it you absolutely can do it and i have faith that you can do it but it takes
00:28:03.360 effort and it takes time you're you might be in the pit of despair i have no idea what you're going
00:28:09.800 through right now some of you guys are on that the highest of the high mountains and some of you are in
00:28:14.260 the pit of despair and most of us are somewhere in between any given day but guys you you can do this
00:28:21.700 focus on what you can control and what i think will happen is over time days weeks months years
00:28:29.920 one day you'll look back and say you know what i remember that but i don't really remember how i felt
00:28:37.260 because i'm in a completely different spot than i am now and life will be better life will be good
00:28:42.920 not to say you're going to absolve yourself of all challenges but life will be better
00:28:47.600 and by the way challenges are a good thing it means you're on the precipice of growth
00:28:52.420 she's not interested in that relationship that's okay precipice of growth what can you do better
00:29:00.580 in the next relationship you have your boss fired you that's okay precipice of growth
00:29:05.460 what can you do better for the next employer or maybe even start your own business
00:29:09.880 i've had that happen medical diagnosis okay what do i need to learn right now i'm right on the cusp
00:29:17.180 of growth what do i need to learn right now to get better and that could transform your life not just
00:29:21.240 physically but in all realms i believe in you i believe in myself even when things aren't going
00:29:27.480 as well as i'd like them to and i would like them to go well all the time but it isn't reality
00:29:31.400 but i believe enough in myself that life will get better if we do the right things number one
00:29:37.100 complacency kills number two externalities are not the problem number three build new let go of the
00:29:44.240 old but build it better number four do not grow bitter and contentious or label i added that as
00:29:49.940 well number five forgive yourself and number six focus on the controllables i help i hope that helps
00:29:55.960 there's a lot of men who are really struggling right now and i would be remiss if i didn't say that
00:30:02.720 if you do these six things you will be in a much much better position in your life and that's what
00:30:06.780 i want for you that's what i want for myself that's what i want for everybody listening and by the way
00:30:11.640 when we do this we can serve people more effectively and that's ultimately what i want i want to be able
00:30:16.580 to serve my family and friends and colleagues and co-workers and the people in my life it requires this
00:30:21.380 when we mess up i hope that serves you guys connect with me on the gram or facebook or x let me know
00:30:26.920 what you guys think if you have any other thoughts on this or commentary please let me know
00:30:30.740 most active over on instagram at ryan mickler and we will be back next week until then go out there
00:30:36.840 take action when you mess up learn and become a man you are meant to be
00:30:41.980 thank you for listening to the order of man podcast you're ready to take charge of your life
00:30:51.640 and be more of the man you were meant to be we invite you to join the order at order of man.com
00:31:00.740 you