Order of Man - Work⧸Life Balance is a Myth, Re-Focusing Your Energy, and When Plans Go Wrong ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

00:00:00.000 You're a man of action. You live life to the fullest, embrace your fears, and boldly chart

00:00:04.980 your own path. When life knocks you down, you get back up one more time, every time.

00:00:10.420 You are not easily deterred or defeated, rugged, resilient, strong. This is your life. This is who

00:00:17.220 you are. This is who you will become. At the end of the day, and after all is said and done,

00:00:22.360 you can call yourself a man. Kip, what's up, man? Great to see you. I was hoping that we could

00:00:31.040 connect this week, but, you know, you had church obligations. I was trying to get you out of

00:00:35.580 teaching a lesson at church, and you're like, sorry, I have to teach at church, but I appreciate

00:00:40.220 your priorities. I got to teach gospel doctrine. Yeah, and it was okay. It was okay. Trust me,

00:00:46.420 I wanted to get out of it. It's just I made the commitment weeks ago, and so I was like,

00:00:50.100 yeah, darn it. Fair enough. No, I get it, and then you just got, you're just on the men 0.98

00:00:55.840 from your man cold, which is why I told the guys, which is why you couldn't be with us

00:00:59.100 last week, so they're glad that you're, you know, healed, and you're out of the hospital,

00:01:03.400 and, you know, all the things that went wrong in your life because you had this little man

00:01:08.280 cold for 24 hours. They were really worried about you. Here's the reality. Man cold, you're

00:01:13.480 supposed to be, you're supposed to get pampered. It didn't work, so maybe I'm over the

00:01:18.440 man colds. They're not paying off. You just do it too often. That's the key. You just

00:01:23.300 do it too often. Now Asia's like, all right, no, dude, you've outworn your welcome on this 1.00

00:01:28.300 one. Yeah, too many man colds. I did tell the guys you were probably being pampered, having 0.99

00:01:36.260 saltines, chicken noodle soup, and watching Price is Right for the entire day because isn't

00:01:40.740 that what we did when we were kids when we had a cold or we faked a cold? Yeah. We watch

00:01:45.540 TV. You can't select anything. You just have to watch whatever's on in the middle of the

00:01:49.980 day. Yeah, man. Price is Right was my go-to. That and All My Children or The Time of Our Lives

00:01:56.940 or something. Soap operas my grandma used to watch. They're so bad too. They're so bad.

00:02:05.180 Well, hey, we got some good questions, but I want to get to a headline first, and this is

00:02:11.660 in the news. This is everywhere right now. It's the crazy Karen who loses her mind at 1.00

00:02:16.080 the Phillies game. You saw this, right? I think everybody's seen this at this point. 0.61

00:02:20.220 Oh, my gosh. I mean, if you don't know, where have you been? But essentially, the gist of

00:02:24.460 the story is that there's three or four people going for a ball that was hit, a home run that

00:02:29.580 was hit, and a dad ran over and he grabbed the ball. The other lady almost got it, but she 1.00

00:02:34.800 didn't. The guy grabbed it. He didn't grab it out of her hand. He didn't fight her for it.

00:02:38.740 He just grabbed it before she did. Yeah. Yeah. And he ran back over to his family, and he

00:02:44.520 gave it to his son, and he felt proud. His son was excited, and crazy Karen came over 0.83

00:02:49.940 and just verbally assaulted the man. And there's three lessons that I wanted to talk about in

00:02:58.960 this. First of all, guys, there are cameras everywhere, especially at a sports game on a

00:03:06.840 home run. Okay, don't do crazy things in public. Don't do crazy things at all, but really just

00:03:12.660 don't do crazy things in public because the odds of it being recorded are significantly higher than

00:03:18.120 they've ever been throughout human history. It used to be that maybe one person saw something

00:03:23.100 dumb you did. Now everybody will see it, especially if it's particularly dumb. The Coldplay cheating 0.99

00:03:30.580 fiasco, this one. Then there's the guy that stabbed the woman on the bus or public transit

00:03:38.280 just over the weekend. Cameras are everywhere, so don't be crazy. And don't be like that lady. I

00:03:44.220 think she's a school administrator, if I understand correctly. Classic. And she since has lost her job 1.00

00:03:50.020 based on what I've seen. No way they fired her for it? That's what it looks like because, well,

00:03:56.460 and you got to think, like, not only that behavior, but when you lose faith of the people that you're

00:04:01.080 trying to serve, you can't serve them anymore. And she was getting emails from students, emails from

00:04:07.040 parents, the school districts, everything else was just bombarding her. She can't effectively do her

00:04:12.480 job anymore. Even if they wanted to keep her around, there's no way that would happen. And I think

00:04:17.000 that's good. Public accountability is good when you behave like a crazy Karen. So that's lesson 0.99

00:04:22.520 number one. Lesson number two, what is with this dude? When she ran over, not only that, but even

00:04:30.320 before that, she ran over and I don't know if you saw the way that he responded. He was like shocked

00:04:35.340 and like held up his hands and made this scared face. Did you see that? Yeah. I'm like, what is with

00:04:41.480 this dude? Like that, that first of all, and I don't want to judge his character. I don't, I don't

00:04:47.120 know the man. I don't know. He seems like he's probably a pretty engaged father, but don't do

00:04:52.620 that. Like turn around, square up if you need to, if you're shocked, but don't do that. Whatever he did

00:04:58.780 and don't give the ball back. You were, you had every right to grab that ball. You did right. You didn't

00:05:04.760 do anything wrong and you don't need to acquiesce to crazy Karen's verbal assault and abuse. Just

00:05:11.460 be, have some fortitude, have some courage, go tell her to sit down, be respectful. You don't need

00:05:16.720 to get into it with her and then just enjoy the night because what are you teaching your son?

00:05:23.060 You're teaching him that if somebody just berates you or somebody doesn't like something that you did,

00:05:28.100 or somebody doesn't like you, that you're the one that has to change, that you're the one has to

00:05:32.780 sacrifice because somebody else has a problem. Now, if he had stole that ball out of her hand,

00:05:38.700 then I think it would be like, Hey, you know what? You're right. I'm sorry. Let me give this back to

00:05:43.140 you. But that's not what happened. He had every right to have that ball. And he taught his son

00:05:48.820 something that I don't think he should have taught him. The third lesson is the Phillies did a phenomenal

00:05:55.200 job to bring this kid in, to give him souvenirs, to treat him like a hero. And they recognized

00:06:02.740 an opportunity. And some people say, well, just marketing. I don't care what it is.

00:06:06.080 They recognized a good opportunity to serve this kid, make it right, uh, save face a little bit. Um,

00:06:13.520 and I think that was a gesture of goodwill. So props to the Phillies for taking care of that young man

00:06:18.840 that way. So kind of an interesting story, kind of funny, but there's a lot to be learned and unpacked

00:06:23.940 from that story. Totally. Well, and what I love about what the Phillies did is look at the turnaround

00:06:28.640 of how that worked out. So, I mean, this happened mid game. So camera guys talked with someone,

00:06:36.360 announcer MC made some phone call, like there's coordination that made that happen for that boy

00:06:42.760 to get the benefit after the game, which is super cool, right? That they rallied. And, and I think the

00:06:49.560 other sentiment that I like about this is people are pissed off. Why? Well, maybe because there's some

00:06:55.780 good people left, maybe there's enough people that still are like, Hey, that's not cool.

00:07:03.160 That's not acceptable. What's rally a little bit, right? Maybe criticize this lady, but most 0.87

00:07:09.840 importantly, like, you know, what's, what's benefit this kid a little bit. And that's, I don't know,

00:07:14.600 like that's nice too, you know, that we're just not all passive. Yeah, I agree with that. And one

00:07:21.200 thing I would say is the lady has more than learned her lesson, I hope at this point. So there's no

00:07:26.620 reason to dog pile at this point, you know, totally kind of sorry for, you know what I mean?

00:07:32.500 Like if she lost her job out of it too, that kind of sucks, right? I don't feel sorry for the

00:07:37.740 consequences of it, but I think it'll probably be, it'll go away eventually, but there will be some

00:07:44.100 residual fallout from it and some of it justified and some of it not. So I don't think we need to pile on

00:07:51.120 at this point. I don't think like doxing or, or, um, threatening or anything. That's something

00:07:57.820 that's obviously very common. I'm sure she's getting that kind of stuff. It's just unnecessary,

00:08:02.320 uncalled for. And we all have bigger things to worry about. Let's take the lessons. Let's hold

00:08:07.160 people accountable if they need it and then drive on with our own lives. Cause that's most important

00:08:10.900 is what you're going to do with your life moving forward. Not what she is. Totally. Yeah. Yeah.

00:08:15.560 Not criticizing everybody else, but yourself. Yeah. Right. Right. Yeah. Well, let's get into some

00:08:19.700 questions. So last week when you weren't here, Kip, I answered questions from our brotherhood,

00:08:24.320 the iron council. Uh, and it was all based on productivity, daily scheduling, uh, productivity,

00:08:31.100 uh, in your day, all that kind of stuff, planning, et cetera. So we had some really good questions and

00:08:37.240 some good feedback on that episode. I think guys were really, uh, found a lot of value from the

00:08:42.520 information there. So we're going to do a part two of that today, uh, using questions from the Facebook

00:08:47.540 group. And then what we're going to do next week is we're going to do a new topic. So we're going to

00:08:52.680 experiment a little bit and try different topics rather than ask me anything about anything.

00:08:57.200 They'll be topic driven. And then we'll answer the questions within those topics. Something to try

00:09:01.920 something that might, uh, help direct a little bit more. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I love it. All right.

00:09:07.740 Will Luna work-life balance. I have a set schedule, but when I get home at the end of the day,

00:09:14.160 I'm tired and I don't have any energy for the honey to-do list. I want to spend that time with my

00:09:20.400 family. Yeah. Well, I don't believe in work-life balance because when people say that term,

00:09:28.100 they're trying to find the perfect ratio of time spent at work versus time spent at home. And that's

00:09:32.980 just not how life works. If I'm under a deadline, I've got to spend more time than normal at work.

00:09:38.320 And it just is the way it is. If one of my children breaks their arm, uh, or gets suspended

00:09:45.000 from school or name it, then maybe I've got to spend a little bit more time with, with my family

00:09:49.960 engaged in, in family life. So I tend to look at balance as a verb rather than some destination or

00:10:00.100 some place that we, we achieve, meaning that you're balancing and you're constantly taking in

00:10:06.060 information from your life and making decisions about where to invest your time and energy in

00:10:11.980 those given moments. And sure, I'd love to be home all day, every day, but I can't. And there's days

00:10:17.960 where I would love to work more because I have work to get done, but I can't have to be at home. So we

00:10:23.640 just have to factor those decisions and get this idea that there's some perfect balance of work and life

00:10:28.660 that will help us achieve all of our wildest, wildest dreams. The second part of this question

00:10:34.840 or the second thing that I wanted to address is why are you tired? Now, I don't know what kind of work

00:10:39.640 you do. If it's manual labor, I can certainly understand being tired. Uh, if it's not manual labor, I can

00:10:45.920 even understand being mentally and emotionally exhausted. Uh, it depending on what your work is, but you

00:10:51.560 shouldn't be tired after an eight hour day to the point where you just want to plop on the couch and not

00:10:57.260 really do anything. And so I have to ask, how's your health? Are you, are you in shape? Are you out

00:11:04.960 of shape? Are you overweight? Are you not sleeping well? Are you not feeling correctly? Are you eating

00:11:10.080 a bunch of junk and processed sugars? Are your hormones out of balance? What's your testosterone

00:11:14.640 levels? Uh, I would take a look into all of that because I think if you were to get that dialed in,

00:11:20.940 you'd find yourself automatically having more energy. And it is a bit counterintuitive when you think that

00:11:26.320 maybe you should get up an hour earlier. What if that was my advice to you? You're like, what an hour

00:11:31.060 earlier? Yeah. To go to the gym. And you might say, well, I'm going to be more tired. You will for two

00:11:36.180 or three days. You definitely will. And then you'll adjust. Your body will make the corrections. You'll

00:11:41.040 start losing weight. You'll, you'll feel better. Your body will heal. And then you'll have more energy

00:11:46.940 at the end of the day. And the third element that I would say on this one is sometimes you have to,

00:11:55.060 what I would call task stack or activity stack. There might be the, the honeydew list that you

00:12:04.380 talked about. Maybe she wants you to fix the toilet that isn't working correctly. And so you got to go

00:12:09.200 in there and fix the lever. I don't know how old your kids are. Bring your kids in there and show them

00:12:13.800 how to do it. Maybe you need to change the oil or maybe you, maybe you don't know how to change the

00:12:18.680 oil, but she wants the oil changed in the car. And so you got to take it down to Jiffy Lube or wherever 0.85

00:12:22.280 you take it. And you take one of the kids and you sing some songs, you have some fun, you drop it off,

00:12:28.180 you go walk down to the icy shop next door or the convenience store and you get a drink and you guys

00:12:33.500 just have a good evening while you're waiting for your car to be fixed. Last night I was putting

00:12:39.200 some hardware on some, some bathroom cabinets and my girlfriend and I were in there just talking.

00:12:46.140 I was doing the work and we were in there talking and it was great. We got that done. We had a good

00:12:51.560 conversation. And so sometimes as a man, you just have to stack things up. And if you can find ways

00:12:57.080 to be efficient in that, I think you'll find that even something as mundane as fixing the toilet lever

00:13:04.980 could actually be a really cool experience between you and your kids or something cool between you

00:13:09.800 and your wife. Yeah, I love it. You know, I like Will's questions. Interesting, right? I kind of

00:13:17.420 chuckled when I read it, right? Cause it's work-life balance. It's schedule. I don't, I can't, I don't

00:13:23.980 have the energy to do the honey to do list. That's my time to spend it with my family. It's like, well,

00:13:29.460 hold on. If you have energy not to do the list, you probably don't have energy to spend quality time

00:13:34.400 with family either. Right? So the energy thing's an energy thing. And I like, Will, I love the idea

00:13:41.020 that you use the word energy because a lot of times I realize like scheduling of what we're doing

00:13:49.960 and trying to be productive. We'll often look at it from a time perspective, but we don't think about

00:13:54.980 managing our energy. And so be mindful of that. One, to Ryan's point, how's your health? All that kind

00:14:03.400 of stuff, but make sure that you're not depleted by the time you go home. Like, so what do you need

00:14:11.900 to do to not be as exhausted at physically and or mentally exhausted at work and prioritize your

00:14:18.260 family? Because if you don't have the energy or the mental capacity, then your priorities are off.

00:14:24.420 And I know that sounds crazy, but that's what you need to do. Someone said this to me the other day,

00:14:30.100 and let me know what your thoughts are on this, Ryan, but it was fascinating. I was talking,

00:14:35.140 I was on the mats. I was talking with this, this uber successful individual. And, and I was telling

00:14:42.140 him about, uh, we were talking about work and I'm like, yeah, you know, it'll take up a lot of time

00:14:46.600 because, you know, for me to put my heart to it. And he goes, well, why would you put all your heart

00:14:53.180 into it for? And I was like, well, because that's what I should do. And he's like, maybe,

00:15:00.380 or maybe you should just do the job, but not give it your all always. And I thought that's

00:15:07.980 interesting. Like my default is always like all in. And he's like, why would you do that?

00:15:15.200 You got to reserve your energy. You got these other folk, like, you know what I mean? And,

00:15:19.420 and so be disrupt that a little bit. I thought it was interesting. And I'm not saying that we don't

00:15:24.620 put our all into it, but I'm also saying, I don't know. It's just this idea.

00:15:32.540 Challenge your way of thinking and challenge how you're showing up at work and make sure you're

00:15:38.080 not prioritizing all your energy on something that's less important than your family.

00:15:43.260 So whatever that looks like, as you were saying that with, with this guy, I mean,

00:15:48.540 he's uber successful. You said that, so he knows some things. So there's gotta be, I mean,

00:15:53.320 he's credible, right? Automatically he's credible. Um, it got me thinking of an analogy. Imagine being

00:16:00.760 a running back for a great football team, like, like Barry Sanders, you know, one of the greatest

00:16:05.760 running backs of all time. Right. And you take a guy like that. And sometimes he's going to charge

00:16:10.600 through the hole and he's going to move and he's going to, he's going to dance and he's going to

00:16:14.520 make his move and score. And other times he's going to slow play a run like a draw or something

00:16:19.600 like that. And he's going to wait for the hole to show itself. And then he's going to kind of move

00:16:22.940 through that hole, read the field, and then he's going to make his move. And what it's got me thinking

00:16:28.160 is that sometimes we, as men just work at a feverish pace because we think if we're busy,

00:16:34.240 we're productive. But if we're working at a feverish pace and we're not doing the right things,

00:16:39.800 then we're just going to achieve failure that much faster.

00:16:45.280 And so I, I would, I, I think just as I heard you say that with this, this guy you were talking

00:16:50.020 with, that there's some validity to not always feeling like you have to work at a feverish pace

00:16:55.900 and letting things play out. Or maybe there's something going on behind the scenes that other

00:17:00.900 people might say, Oh, he's, he's slacking. It's like, no, I'm not slacking. I'm just focused on this

00:17:04.960 other project that you don't even know exists yet. So I think there's something to be said for that

00:17:09.820 too. Yeah. Right. Focus of, of priority. Here's a, here's another crazy thought. It's a little bit

00:17:16.300 of a derail, but I, I think there's some truth to this. It's a quote by Dale Carnegie. I use this

00:17:22.880 quote a lot to illustrate why employees are disengaged at work and they feel burned out.

00:17:31.460 I use this quote a lot to, to kind of disrupt people's thought process because at first glance,

00:17:37.200 when you hear that, Ryan, an employee's burned out. What do you think? Their work in 60, 70 hours.

00:17:43.440 Yeah. Yeah. They're working hours. Here's this quote by Dale Carnegie. Our fatigue is often caused not

00:17:50.140 by work, but by worry, frustration, and resentment. And I think that's profound, man. You start thinking

00:18:00.000 about what eats up your energy is the energy of, oh man, I had an eight hour day. I got so much done

00:18:06.640 and I'm feeling happy about my job and my marriage that wears you out. Or is it the things that you're

00:18:13.820 kicking the can down the road, the things you're procrastinating, the unresolved relationship that

00:18:20.340 you haven't addressed. Those things eat up energy probably more than anything else. Right. And so

00:18:26.980 yes, health dial in, but maybe focus on the mind a little bit. What's eating up your mental fortitude

00:18:34.860 around worry, frustration, and resentment that might play a part as well.

00:18:40.540 That's actually a good point because I think about how busy I like to be on vacation,

00:18:44.680 but I'm not tired on vacation, but I'm just as active on vacation as I am during the day. I'm just

00:18:51.120 doing different things. It's a good point. Yeah. Very interesting.

00:18:54.120 Yeah. You feel, you feel, you're feeling better about the stuff that you're doing.

00:18:58.540 Yeah. I'm energized. Yeah. All right, cool. What's next? Yeah. All right. Eric Searing,

00:19:03.960 refocusing or recalibrating your goals and structure when interruptions occur?

00:19:11.620 Well, first limit the interruptions. So figure out what type of interruptions are happening

00:19:18.000 because you're, you're hyper inefficient during interruptions. So you have to, you have to block

00:19:26.360 that out. You have to establish boundaries. You have to ensure that people know your code of conduct,

00:19:33.680 so to speak, how, how, and when they can reach out to you, when they can connect with you. You also

00:19:39.540 have to know what your temptations are. Uh, my phone's over on my, here's a great example. My phone's

00:19:45.060 over there on the desk. It's not in front of me because if it was in front of me, it's going to

00:19:49.620 be beeping at me. People are going to be sending texts and everything else. And then I'm going to

00:19:52.980 be distracted from doing this. I don't want to be distracted. I want to be focused on the

00:19:58.540 conversation Kip you and I are having and the quality of answers that we're providing to the

00:20:02.420 men who will listen. So I eliminate distractions. My environment is conducive and set up in a way that

00:20:08.200 I have minimum distractions, even when I'm doing stuff. Cause I work at home and my kids are here.

00:20:14.200 I tell my kids, Hey guys, I'm jumping on a meeting unless it's an emergency or something's horribly

00:20:19.700 wrong. Don't, don't interrupt. Here's dinner. Here's a couple of things you could do. Here's how

00:20:26.140 to entertain yourselves. And when I'm done, here's what we're going to do. So look forward to that.

00:20:30.460 But I set those things up ahead of time so that I'm not distracted. But if you are, this is where

00:20:36.580 having a plan comes in place. Most guys wing it. They really do. They get into work and they only

00:20:45.220 then do they decide what they're going to do. And then they get that thing done. They're like, okay,

00:20:49.120 what do I do next? Let's see. Um, well, this isn't this. No, I already have my week planned out.

00:20:55.060 I know everything I'm going to do today. I've built in buffers. I talked about that on the podcast last

00:20:59.940 week. I know what's going to happen tomorrow and the next day and the next day and the next day I have

00:21:03.520 buffers. So if things go wrong, it's not going to completely derail my week. I know that if I can

00:21:08.020 only accomplish one or two things today and it still be a success, I'm going to do that first

00:21:11.900 because I don't know what's going to happen this afternoon. Yeah. Something, some great opportunity

00:21:17.520 might present itself. For example, if Joe Rogan said, Hey, I want you to be on the podcast at three

00:21:23.100 o'clock this afternoon, I'm dropping everything else. I'm going to be there because that's a good

00:21:28.000 opportunity to be there. Right. Um, or if, or if there's something even more catastrophic, you know,

00:21:34.720 one of my kids, uh, is in a car accident, you know, things like that happen too. I can't let that stuff

00:21:40.740 derail me. But when it does, if you have a plan, then you can get right back on track. So if I know,

00:21:47.420 for example, that I'm going to be checking and responding to emails and text correspondence from

00:21:52.300 noon to two, uh, and then something comes up, somebody distracts me, I still have to keep to

00:21:57.600 that noon to two schedule, but I'm not going to have to figure out what I'm going to do so I can

00:22:01.660 get back into the process quicker. If I get distracted, uh, there's other things you could

00:22:06.240 do like delegation. You can tell people, Hey, at two o'clock I'm available. So kick the can down the

00:22:11.720 road a little bit until two o'clock. That's when I'll be available for you. You don't need to make

00:22:15.800 other people's problems your priority unless it's a problem for you. And in that case,

00:22:19.760 that's where the buffers come in. Yeah. Well, and, and before I add some thoughts on Eric,

00:22:25.960 let me, let me read this question by Justin, cause it's real, it's correlates. And I want to see if

00:22:30.720 you want to add anything, uh, in addition to your response. He says, Justin Herzl says,

00:22:36.540 would like to hear your thoughts on creating a plan that encompasses daily activities that move the

00:22:41.900 needle and trying that into a long-term objective so that everything is in full alignment,

00:22:47.300 how to get back on track when the routine goes off the rails because of unforeseen circumstances,

00:22:53.320 getting clear on what you want in life so that you always have directional correctness.

00:23:01.160 Is that a question? Cause it sounds like it's pretty comprehensive.

00:23:05.560 Yeah, I think so. I mean, just your thoughts on anything you would add around. Cause I,

00:23:11.200 what I liked about what he wrote here is kind of full alignment, right? Bigger picture as part of

00:23:16.920 that. Right. So then that way, when there's disruption, you can kind of go back to and

00:23:21.900 know what the priorities are. Well, that's what, that's the exact planning model that we use in

00:23:28.400 our 12 week battle planning model. The idea that you, that first you create a vision for yourself,

00:23:35.820 either goals-based or values-based vision on how you're going to show up, what you want,

00:23:42.000 how you want to be viewed in the world, how you want to view the world and what you want your

00:23:45.140 environment around you to look like. So that's the very first thing. And coincidentally enough,

00:23:51.040 it's, it's the thing that's most overlooked. Most men just get right into work, just work. It's like,

00:23:58.540 whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, we'll get to work. We will, trust me. But we need to make sure that the work

00:24:03.760 we're doing is actually going to, as Justin said, move the needle in the right direction, but move the

00:24:09.620 needle towards what? If you haven't thought about what you want, what needle are you moving and where is

00:24:14.300 it moving to? What is it, what is it pointing to? Nothing. It's just spinning around in circles,

00:24:20.220 that needle on the compass, just spinning around in circles. What is it aiming at? So figure that out

00:24:26.260 first. And we have exercises for that. If you want to go to, uh, order a man.com slash battle ready,

00:24:31.680 we'll teach you those exercises on how to write your vision from your vision. You then begin to create

00:24:37.780 objectives and we cover four key areas. And I won't get into all this now just for the sake of time,

00:24:43.200 but we get into 12 week objectives in four key categories of life. What am I going to accomplish

00:24:50.680 in 12 weeks? And then once you have those objectives, then you reverse engineer into tactics.

00:24:55.920 What is going to, what do I need to do every day to ensure that I meet that objective?

00:25:01.440 And then that way, the most important things I do on a daily basis are those four things.

00:25:06.440 And when anything else comes up, I ask myself, is this in alignment with my objectives and,

00:25:13.920 or my vision? And if it's not, I'm less inclined to do it. That's not to say I won't because it may

00:25:19.180 require my attention. If I have an emergency that may not align with my vision or my objective, but it

00:25:25.340 is, for example, an important part of connection and relationships, which is one of the areas that we

00:25:31.300 cover. So everything is moving in alignment towards the type of man that I want to be.

00:25:37.100 And if I deviate from that, I can address those as long as they're worthy of addressing and then

00:25:41.640 correct it, fix it, do whatever, and then get back to my tactics for the day.

00:25:47.440 Totally. You know what, what disruptions are? The difficult ones are the ones that we create for

00:25:55.660 ourselves because of some instant dopamine hit, or we lose priority of what we should be doing

00:26:03.340 for the sake of some quick win or some other item that is outside the list of the priority,

00:26:09.700 right? Like there are disruptions, obviously, that people will bring to the table and disrupt us.

00:26:15.340 But I think especially a high caliber man, a lot of the guys in the iron council,

00:26:19.640 probably the bigger, more difficult disruptions are the things that we add, that we disrupted.

00:26:27.280 And then we start on a tangent, start going down some path because of some instant gratification,

00:26:33.160 or if I do this thing, it strokes my ego in a particular way, but it's out of alignment with

00:26:39.580 the very thing that I said was important. And so keep in mind, there's two types of disruptions,

00:26:44.700 obviously ones that people bring to the table, but be very mindful of what disruptions you're

00:26:49.320 creating for yourself that might not be in the top priority list.

00:26:55.680 Yeah. And I, and I would say even to whittle that down, maybe a little bit further, I think what

00:27:00.200 you're saying is right. And also what I've seen guys do, myself included are what I would call

00:27:04.540 noble obstacles. And a noble obstacle is something that seems noble. It seems righteous. It seems like

00:27:11.480 a good thing to do. So an example of that would be you get a phone call from a friend, maybe you've

00:27:17.500 known him for 20, 30 years. And he started up a 501c3, a really cool charity or organization that

00:27:25.120 is doing great work. And you really want to be a man who helps and sits on the board and

00:27:29.440 volunteers and contributes and gives back and gives insight. And so you say, yeah, I'll sit on your

00:27:35.000 board. I would love to do that. And then all of a sudden it takes up two, three, five hours a week

00:27:40.180 that could be spent on your business or on your family. And I'm not saying you shouldn't sit on the

00:27:45.040 board, by the way. That's not what I'm telling you. What I'm telling you is, does that align with

00:27:49.720 your mission? If your mission is to give back, well, maybe you're already sitting on a board.

00:27:53.760 Why do you need to sit on two? People say that all the time. Well, I just want to be helpful. Let

00:27:58.040 somebody else be helpful in that department. If you really want to be helpful, then double down with

00:28:02.820 the thing you're already doing. So if you already sit on a board, give them two more hours and let

00:28:07.760 somebody else sit on that board. Again, it all is based on your vision, not what I think you should

00:28:13.720 do. What did you call those, Ryan? Noble obstacles. You had a label. Noble obstacles. I like that. I

00:28:21.140 like that. And in corporate America, this happens all the time. It's funny. We'll talk about on the

00:28:26.660 business front, how often we need to create alignment between leadership and employees, right?

00:28:31.720 That there's unified focus around what we do. I actually, I used to think, oh, that's a problem.

00:28:36.680 Like we need to get people aligned. I actually don't think it's a problem. I think most employees

00:28:41.720 and most organizations are actually fully aligned. Do what's right for the customer, do quality work.

00:28:48.480 Like there's not a problem with alignment. The problem is, is all the little pet projects and all

00:28:54.720 the little things that people are implementing. Why? Because it makes them feel validated and good

00:29:00.000 about their position. It's the distractions we create in our environment that prevent us from

00:29:07.520 acting on something greater for the organization. So just, and you can see how that correlates,

00:29:13.760 obviously at the personal level. But interesting nonetheless.

00:29:17.560 Well, I've always thought that, I don't know if I've always thought this, but I think, I believe

00:29:22.440 this now is it's much more effective and efficient as your use of time and resources goes to do what

00:29:30.360 you're currently doing better than it is to do something different. And that applies to everything.

00:29:38.480 If, if, uh, you know, if, if you're at work and you've got an assignment that you need to do,

00:29:44.620 or maybe that is your department, you might say, oh, well, what if this, and we can sprinkle that

00:29:48.640 and sprinkle that dude, you're not even doing 80 to 90% of the work you could be doing at your

00:29:52.920 current thing. You want to feel valuable. I get that desire. We have guys that do this in the iron

00:29:57.940 council. I'll be like, oh, I'm going to start this new thing or this new channel in iron council.

00:30:01.860 I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on. You're not even contributing to the channel that applies to

00:30:05.840 now. Do that. Well, I just want to be valuable. I want to add that. That's adding value. That's,

00:30:10.800 that's being valuable. And it doesn't consume so much of your time. Same thing with the gym.

00:30:16.660 You know, you get, get your core workout in, get your, your deadlifts, your squats, your,

00:30:20.660 your push, your press, your pull, pull-ups, bench press, and maybe a few little ancillary things there.

00:30:26.400 And that's it. You don't need the latest gadget and gizmo that isolates the one little muscle group,

00:30:32.960 unless you're doing a bodybuilding competition, it's unimportant. Diet is very much the same way.

00:30:39.840 Everybody's looking for the, the fat and the pill and the, this and the, that and the needle and the

00:30:43.560 shot and the whatever. It's like, just, just stop drinking soda. Get to 80% of what you know you

00:30:49.440 should be doing. If you're not at 80 to 90% of what you should be doing right now, don't even think

00:30:55.300 about implementing something else. Cause 80 to 90% on one thing is better than 50% on two things.

00:31:07.420 Yeah. Yeah, totally. I love it. Joe Marino, um, his ask is maybe, uh, mentioned something around

00:31:15.200 income spending trackers. Um, he says, I'm in the early stages of creating one on a Golga sheets for

00:31:21.140 tracking monthly income and spending. So thoughts around income spending trackers. Uh, just through

00:31:26.720 your bank. Uh, I, again, I don't think we need to, there's so many apps. Yeah. You could use an app.

00:31:32.340 I mean, most banks at this point, they have their own thing and it's already synced to your account

00:31:36.740 and it'll show you where all your spending is on a month. I mean, my bank has that other banks that

00:31:41.500 I've heard that guys have, have that where it ought to, it does it automatically. You already have it

00:31:46.580 probably. And so if you're looking for these types of things, just use what your bank has

00:31:51.240 because it's the easiest, it's going to get you started the fastest. It's already synced up to

00:31:56.740 your account. And that's what I would use. That's what I do use. Yeah. Christopher Hallmark, you're

00:32:04.120 going to resonate with Christopher here. Uh, do you find it beneficial in sitting down to write things

00:32:09.440 out versus scheduling and tracking things in a digital application, uh, digital application based

00:32:15.760 platform. I tend to feel more connected and focused if I write personal things down because I do so much

00:32:21.360 work on my phone. I agree. I agree. I don't, I don't think it's wrong to use a digital app. I think

00:32:29.900 some guys thrive with an app, I think, but if I have to pull out my phone and I have a to-do list and

00:32:35.400 then I have to check it off and then I have to, it's almost takes me long. It's almost longer to do

00:32:39.920 that rather than to have this just in my grill where I can just write down what I need to write down.

00:32:45.760 See what I need to see all in one easy thing. It's, it's, and it might just be familiarity.

00:32:51.580 Like I'm so good with this at this point after doing it for 10 years that this is just an easy

00:32:56.140 way to do it. But I think to his point, it is satisfying to be able to write it down. Uh, I

00:33:01.520 believe that it's going to be more ingrained into your psyche. If you do spend time writing it down

00:33:07.500 and checking off the list, I think it will feel better. So this is what I use, but if you wanted to

00:33:14.340 use it digitally, then that works too. What I do for digital is ideas. I write down my ideas digitally

00:33:21.840 because I don't have this all the time. So for example, if I'm out to dinner, I don't, I'm not a

00:33:27.540 psycho. I don't have my battle planner in my pocket if I'm out to dinner, cause I'm enjoying dinner with

00:33:31.700 people I love, but I do have my phone. And so when it's appropriate, I might just pull out my phone

00:33:37.680 and say, Oh, that was interesting. You know, the server said something and it made me think about the

00:33:42.280 way that we ought to show up for other people. And so I'll write that down. And I have a very

00:33:46.300 elaborate, I'm actually using it right now because I take notes for our ask me anything in this system,

00:33:52.240 but I, I just use notes on my iPhone. It's not a paid app. It's not anything fancy. I just have

00:33:58.720 it organized in a way that's conducive to what I'm trying to accomplish. So if I want to go in here

00:34:03.740 and I want to, um, record a Friday field notes for this week, I can come in here. I've got,

00:34:09.120 I would say just right off the cuff, 20 topics that are somewhat fleshed out that I can just pull

00:34:16.580 one of these topics and address any one of these in a matter of a few minutes. Cause I've got it

00:34:23.020 very well organized here. Yeah. Perfect segue Gabriel Lord. Um, what tools do you recommend?

00:34:30.860 So I think he's just looking for tools that we use any other tools that you'd add to that.

00:34:35.560 He mentions AI project trackers, Trello, et cetera, right? I'm a simple man. And, and I've just found

00:34:44.260 that the more simple or the less complicated, however you want to look at it, the better it's

00:34:50.260 going to be. I think people overthink it. I think they over plan. I think they overstructure

00:34:58.020 and I think it leads to inefficiencies and ineffectiveness. I do. Yeah. I don't need 17

00:35:05.220 apps. Here's what I use. I use this battle planner that I'm holding. So it's a physical battle planner.

00:35:11.500 I use notes on my phone that I just told you. And some of my topics here are Friday field notes,

00:35:17.300 book notes. So if I'm reading a book, I'll put notes in there, ask me anything notes,

00:35:21.720 notes. Um, notes. When I do podcasts, I have podcast guest list notes, um, projects,

00:35:29.160 social media content, things that I want to post on social media. Um, and, and, and a,

00:35:33.700 and a bunch of other things as well, new ideas, things like that. And then I use Google calendar.

00:35:39.120 Yeah. And that's it. I think that's, that's the things that I'd recommend to Gabriel is like

00:35:44.440 whatever you're using, like centralize it. If you can, you know, obviously I'm assuming your Google

00:35:49.040 calendar is like all encompassing, right? It's not like separated, like order, man, versus,

00:35:54.300 versus personal, right? Like my calendar is my calendar. It's Kip Sorensen's calendar,

00:35:59.560 right? And so it's chaos. Um, I share that with my wife. Yeah. Yeah. She'll send me invites to get

00:36:07.560 things on my calendar, just like anyone else. So I schedule personal life, just like I'd schedule

00:36:14.260 meetings. So, so I have a standardized process around my scheduling. Um, personally, I use,

00:36:21.180 I use what integrates well with work. So if, if we weren't on a Microsoft platform, I'd probably use

00:36:28.600 a different tool. Why? Because I don't want two different tools, right? So for me, Microsoft has a

00:36:34.120 tool called Microsoft to do, and it aggregates any assigned tasks to me across the entire ecosystem.

00:36:40.840 So I can see everything that's ever been assigned to me at one point on my phone or on my PC browser,

00:36:47.720 whatever. So, right. So that's tool number one from a, from a tracking perspective. And then the

00:36:52.540 other tool I use kind of like your similar notes is, uh, an app called one note. And it's great.

00:36:58.560 Cause it's, I use it on my phone. I use it on my PC. It's synced. I have a notebook has sections,

00:37:04.300 has pages. And I, I use it the same way. Idea enters my mind. I go, ah, you know, plop it,

00:37:11.080 whether I'm on my phone or my PC document it. And then if I need to reference it, I have a central

00:37:16.840 location to get to it. For me, the key thing is, and this is coming from someone that's a

00:37:22.000 technologist, right? Like my, I've made my living for the last 20 plus years in the space of technology,

00:37:27.640 right? So if anybody should be pitching tech as a solution, it should be me, right? Tech's not a

00:37:34.300 solution. It automates and amplifies what's there. So whatever it is, have a system, a process

00:37:45.540 and, and utilize technology to help it. But if you can't do it with sticky notes, if you can't do it

00:37:52.080 with the battle planner, it doesn't matter. Right. And that's kind of the, the recommendation I would

00:37:57.740 have is, is have a good process in place. And then if you find some tech that works great, awesome,

00:38:03.380 but don't think tech is the solution. You don't need tech. You could do it with sticky notes and be

00:38:09.040 highly productive. Yeah. And I would argue you're not a tech guy. I would argue you're an efficiency

00:38:14.640 and effectiveness guy. I'm a realist. I mean, that's truly. And so you're looking for tools that are

00:38:21.560 going to be effective, effective and efficient. And if tech happens to be it, then you're going

00:38:25.420 to utilize the tech to do it. And if it's not, then, then you won't. Um, a couple of other things

00:38:29.760 that I use is, well, so on calendars, I have calendars for everything. My kids sports goes on

00:38:36.360 its separate calendar, but it's all aggregated into my, my Google calendar, right? Work. Um, I even have

00:38:43.300 a call list calendar. So there's people, I've got a couple of calls to make this afternoon when I'm on

00:38:47.320 the road and I have, I have a list of three or four guys that I need to call and that's in purple and

00:38:52.520 they're just little 15 minute time blocked window. And I just know, okay, boom, boom, boom. I got to

00:38:57.420 call those three people. Good. Done. Um, reading is something that I've actually changed over the past,

00:39:03.580 I would say six months to a year. And I do a lot more listening than I do reading because I'm busy

00:39:10.180 and listening is effective. I can do 1.7 times speed or 1.5, depending on who's narrating it.

00:39:17.880 And I can get through a lot of information very quickly. And I, and I like, and I'm on the road.

00:39:23.480 So I like that that works out pretty well for me. But you know, the thing I was thinking of when you

00:39:28.560 were talking about tech and efficiency is again, to use an analogy of a football team, because I like,

00:39:33.640 I like analogies. They help me grasp it better is, you know, you could have the trickiest play in the

00:39:38.740 world. It could be so clever and beautifully crafted and it could look really cool on the

00:39:43.720 whiteboard with the X's and O's and everybody's got their assignments. But if you can't run the

00:39:48.320 damn play, it isn't really that beautiful. And I've found that the best teams, they usually have 0.99

00:39:54.740 about 10 to 15 plays. That's it. And they have variations of those plays. So they have a left and

00:40:01.520 the right side. They have, you know, the two hole, the four hole, the six hole. So that turns one play

00:40:06.060 into three, but one play is actually six plays because you have the two, the four is at six,

00:40:10.600 and then the one, the three, the five hole. And so now you have three plays on each side based on

00:40:14.620 one play. And, and that's simple. That's effective. I think I remember years ago when Peyton Manning was

00:40:21.860 still playing. I think he, it might've been in the Superbowl, but somebody who was being interviewed

00:40:26.940 and they were going, Oh no, it was Tom Brady. And, and somebody said, do you, do you feel like your

00:40:33.680 defense is going to do well against Tom Brady? And the guy said something like, you know, our

00:40:37.920 defense is solid. We've studied film and we've done this and we've done that. But at the end of

00:40:41.420 the day, it's Tom Brady and we still have to stop him. We, he could tell us the play and it would

00:40:45.880 still be potent against any defense in the NFL because he's so good at basic fundamental things

00:40:52.780 that even if you knew the play, it would still be hard to stop.

00:40:56.140 Yeah. I mean, I can't help but make the correlation, you know, jujitsu, how many hundreds

00:41:04.320 of types of submissions there are. There's tons, right? There's so many fancy moves, top submission,

00:41:10.060 rear naked choke. Number two, arm bar. Number three, triangle. Number four, Kimora.

00:41:16.720 Yeah.

00:41:17.620 White belts know all those, but still it's the fundamental submissions that everyone catches 0.99

00:41:24.300 in a tournament. It's not the fancy one. And you know, what's, what else is funny about that

00:41:29.640 Kip is just based on our, our level, my level of jujitsu versus yours, we could sit down on the

00:41:36.160 mat and we could say, all right, we're going to, we're going to roll for three minutes. And you could

00:41:39.700 say, here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to do this. Then I'm going to take your back,

00:41:46.780 but then I'm going to let it go just because I want to toy around with you a little bit. 0.55

00:41:50.100 And instead of choking you, I'm going to push your head down. I'm going to grab your arm and 1.00

00:41:54.040 I'm going to arm bar you face down. But you, you could tell me that. And based on our level of 0.99

00:42:01.400 skill, you'd probably be accurate about 95 plus percent of the time. And the only other time would

00:42:08.520 be like some little fluke, but 95% of the time you could probably execute that against somebody of

00:42:14.520 my caliber. And that just goes to show you that if you know your system well enough,

00:42:19.820 you're unstoppable. And that goes back to our lack of focus, being distracted, know the play,

00:42:27.120 know the route, get so good at it that nothing is going to deter you from accomplishing it.

00:42:34.240 Totally. I love it. All right. Richard, Richard Dennison, he has a good one here. How to best

00:42:40.140 incorporate and do a brief weekly family meeting so as to align with setting personal goals?

00:42:49.140 Well, the thing I would say on family meetings is really it's, it's age dependent. Um, if you treat

00:42:55.360 your kids like you, then you're going to lose them. You really are. So try not to based on their ages,

00:43:02.400 make it so elaborate that they dread doing family meeting with you every time. Try to infuse some

00:43:08.200 energy, some life and some fun. So it might, you might talk about, Hey, what are your goals?

00:43:14.280 What are your goals this week, guys? It's Sunday night. We're going to sit down for an hour and we're

00:43:18.760 just going to talk about two things you want to get done this week. And maybe that's all the family

00:43:23.180 meeting is. And everybody goes around and they say, I want to do this and this, I want to do this and

00:43:26.780 this. And you just go through them family and you tell everybody what your goals are and everybody

00:43:30.840 writes it down and you slap it on the refrigerator. And then Monday night when you're having dinner,

00:43:36.240 it's like, Hey, you know, Billy, you said that you wanted to, um, make the, the football team.

00:43:44.720 And so how did you, you have to lift and you have to run and you have to be conditioned. So how did

00:43:49.560 that go today? What'd you do today? I think it could be as simple as that. And then maybe it's a

00:43:55.460 lesson, you know, maybe at the end you give a little bit of a lesson that you think is important. I

00:43:59.800 wouldn't make it a half hour lesson. I'd make it a three minute lesson. And then after that,

00:44:04.340 everybody goes and gets ice cream Sunday night and we go out together and we don't talk about

00:44:08.100 the goals. We just go out and have fun now. And I think if you do that, you're going to have a,

00:44:13.920 I wouldn't even call it a family meeting because then it brings formality to it. It's like, Oh God,

00:44:20.160 dad is family meeting again. Freaking family meeting. Yeah. Yeah. So I would just infuse a lot

00:44:26.300 more fun than you initially think you ought to. And again, it's age dependent, but that's what I would

00:44:31.100 do. Yeah. Here's an idea. And I might, I might steal this idea actually. Cause I'm like, I'm kind

00:44:37.680 of digging this, you know, let me run this by you, Ryan. Um, in, in the dev space, software engineers,

00:44:43.340 uh, this idea of a daily standup, super common and we call them daily standups, um, in agile software

00:44:53.000 development. And the idea is that you're standing up, you're not sitting down. So it's supposed to be

00:44:56.540 rapid fire. And it's the standup of what are you working on today in the software that you're

00:45:02.400 developing as a team. So then that way we all understand where we're at in the code. And if

00:45:08.760 there's any potential blockers on what you plan to get done today, that's the whole intent. Got it.

00:45:14.400 Um, I do standups, even though I don't run a software development team anymore, we still do

00:45:18.400 standups and our standup is what do you got today? And anything I need to be aware of anything you need

00:45:24.600 support for me and any issues so we can unblock each other. And it might be a really fast, like,

00:45:30.980 no, I'm working on this. I'm solid. No, nothing. Or I might be like, Hey, I'm doing this. Hey, I need

00:45:35.860 this from you, Ryan, or I needed some clarity for me to progress on this thing that I need to get done

00:45:41.500 today. And that's it. And then we wrap up the call. Right. And right now I'm like thinking, Hey man,

00:45:47.140 I'm thinking daily standup before we go off to school. What do we got today? Right. We're all

00:45:52.560 buttoned up on schedules. No issues. We're all clear. Any concerns that you guys have break.

00:45:58.800 Yeah. Might be something fun. I like, I like it. I think if you can make it fun and playful,

00:46:04.100 if you could add again, fun rules, like put a timer to it, you know, it's like you have,

00:46:10.540 you have 15 seconds, you have to stop talking after 15 seconds. So I don't care if you're mid 1.00

00:46:17.060 sentence or whatever, or, you know, maybe some days you mix it up. Maybe, maybe one person comes

00:46:24.220 up with a theme of whatever that standup is. And everybody has to focus on the theme or maybe on

00:46:31.500 Thursday mornings, it's like joke, joke, joke, Thursday mornings, where everybody just comes

00:46:36.700 with their favorite joke. And that's what it is. It's just a joke. It's not, here's what I'm doing

00:46:40.880 today. Here's it's just a joke. That's it. And everybody makes each other laugh. And then it's

00:46:44.960 like, good break, go. I think things like that, mixing it up will add a lot of value to something

00:46:51.000 like this. All right. Ty Sherwood, is it better to plan a week ahead or the night before or the same

00:46:58.820 day? Two of three, a week ahead and the night before. Yeah. And the night before is just a check

00:47:08.200 in, right? That's all it is. It's like, because things change, right? If I plan, and I know with about

00:47:14.020 80% surety, what I'm going to be doing through this week, I already know all, most of my appointments

00:47:20.440 are booked. Most of my schedule is set. I already know what I need to accomplish this week. It's

00:47:26.640 already done. And so I have that week already planned out because of Google calendar and everything

00:47:30.900 else. And then every night I just recap, okay, what did I get done today? That's done, that's done,

00:47:36.500 and that's done, but I still have this. Oh, that one thing came up. You know what? I need to plug

00:47:40.340 that in tomorrow. I didn't anticipate that, but I'm going to plug that in, plug that into the thing

00:47:45.040 and make your adjustments. So having a daily check-in and I would do it after, because I think

00:47:51.540 if you do it after it's fresh, like, okay, I don't have to remember anything that happened the day

00:47:56.300 before. It's really fresh in your mind. And it also tees you up for the next day. I have found that

00:48:01.840 when I know what I'm going to do the next day, I'm much more enthusiastic and energetic about what the

00:48:07.320 day holds. But if I don't know, I'm lethargic, I'm lazy, I kind of drag my feet, I get distracted

00:48:14.800 easily, and I'm much less productive if I haven't thought about it the night before.

00:48:20.140 Totally. And you can kind of, there's an, I don't know what it is. There's like a sense of

00:48:23.840 gamifying to it. That's kind of fun. I mean, I knew this morning because I made this list last night,

00:48:30.380 the four critical things that must happen today. Like unconditional, I have to get these four things

00:48:37.940 done. I found myself, I knew this podcast, we're going to be recording at 10 a.m. And around nine,

00:48:45.460 I was like, hmm, I'm going to try to get two of the four done before 10 a.m. Yeah. And guess what?

00:48:53.200 I got them done. It wasn't a big deal. I time box it. I'm like, bam, bam, bam. I'm feeling great.

00:48:57.920 And it's 10 a.m. Right? I'm already tack, like the day's almost already a success,

00:49:03.580 right? Because I, I, I gamified it a little bit by identifying these top critical issues the night

00:49:09.140 before. And, and I was able to execute and be super intentional when I started my day this morning.

00:49:16.280 Kip, I actually had the same thing to give you another example, just to prove the point of what

00:49:21.020 you're talking about. I knew that I had to do a little podcast prep work for the podcast that's

00:49:26.120 being released tomorrow. I needed to record a few things and get it to my editor and around nine

00:49:30.700 30, cause I was doing other things. So at nine 30, I'm like, okay, I have a half an hour before

00:49:34.500 Kip and I have this conversation. I think between nine 30 and 10, I can write out what I need to say

00:49:41.720 and I'll do that. And so at nine 30, I started, I wrote it out and it took me like 11 minutes.

00:49:49.140 I'm like, okay, I still have 19 minutes. It takes me about 10 minutes to record that.

00:49:53.660 So I'm like, well, I'll just record it really quick. I was planning on recording that after

00:49:58.340 this podcast, Kip. Well, guess what? I already did it. I wrote the thing. I recorded already.

00:50:04.240 And then I have a meeting at noon. So that's about an hour away from, from now. And I gave myself

00:50:10.260 an hour to prep for that meeting. Well, I don't think I'm going to need an hour because I already

00:50:15.920 freed up some of that time. And so now I, now I have an extra half an hour that I captured and I can go

00:50:21.400 through. And I think in 30 minutes that I just freed up, I can hammer out probably 20 or so emails

00:50:27.480 that I need to get done before I get prepped for my meeting. And my meeting prep might really only

00:50:32.820 take me 15 to 20 minutes. So I've already captured about 45 minutes of my day, not to dink around and

00:50:42.560 doom scroll on social media to do my next thing. So that when I'm done at the end of the day,

00:50:48.800 I feel really proud of what I accomplished. And I can to the, I think the first person asked about

00:50:54.900 work-life balance, I can go be present in my personal life without having to worry about all

00:51:00.440 the things I didn't do today, because that's not the case. I got it all done today. I already am.

00:51:05.680 And you are too, it sounds like. Yeah. So last question from Greg Lewis, and we've kind of addressed

00:51:12.520 Greg's question, but there's an element of this, Ryan, that I want to talk about kind of like the

00:51:16.880 mental side of this. So kind of listen to this question from a, from a mindset perspective. He

00:51:21.940 says, we know that we know the same when man makes a plan, God laughs. I know for me, when plans go off

00:51:29.700 the rails, so do I emotionally, physical, even spiritual resolve weakens and sometimes dies out.

00:51:38.020 So let's talk about the mental state of when things go awry. And then we've, you know,

00:51:45.120 have a tendency sometimes us men to throw our hands up, right? It's like, ah, you know, and then we stop

00:51:51.040 executing the plan because the expectations and other things.

00:51:57.280 So I would say this, I'm writing some notes down here because these frameworks help me. So the

00:52:03.500 framework, and I just thought of this, and so I'm going to be thinking out loud a little bit.

00:52:08.080 The framework is this, anticipate and recalibrate. If you do those two things and I'll have to come

00:52:17.680 up with another word. So it kind of has some alliteration in there, but anticipate, recalibrate.

00:52:23.140 So anticipate that things are going to go wrong. They just are. And if you can anticipate even what

00:52:28.800 those might be, then you'll be even more prepared. So Kip, you and I block out 90 minute segments for

00:52:35.320 hour long meetings. I know that. So right now it's 1105. We usually get wrapped up at 11,

00:52:41.540 but if we go over, it's not really a big deal because we still have that. We, we still have 25

00:52:49.520 minutes if we need it. We're not going to take that, but we still have it if we need it. So we block out

00:52:53.840 those 90 days. It's anticipating what might go wrong or what might get us off track. Recalibrate is

00:52:59.920 knowing that as soon as it gets off the rails, okay, stop. Don't just go into panic mode. Don't

00:53:07.520 just start randomly doing any things. It's recalibration. You need to stop. It's like having

00:53:12.880 a big piece of machinery at a plant manufacturing facility. And all of a sudden that machine,

00:53:21.140 it starts skewing the product. The product's off a little bit. Something's happening. Maybe things

00:53:27.180 aren't aligning or it's breaking down or whatever. What do you, you don't just turn it up. You don't

00:53:33.400 just go say, Oh, it's not working. Let's make the machine go faster. Make more widgets. Yeah.

00:53:38.740 You say, Oh, shut it down. Shut it down. That's the first thing you do. Shut it, shut it down.

00:53:44.100 And then you shut it down and you start to recalibrate. You'd run some tests. You figure

00:53:49.500 out where the breakdown in the system was, and then you figure out where it was. And then you just

00:53:54.160 recalibrate it. You're like, Oh, it was just off. I need to adjust left and up three or whatever you

00:53:59.260 make your recalibration and then you activate. I guess that's maybe the last one. So that was

00:54:04.140 pretty good on the fly, right? Activate. So that's pretty good. So you've got anticipate,

00:54:08.840 recalibrate and activate. So once you've recalibrated and you know, now, what does that

00:54:14.260 look like? Reprioritize, right? This went wrong. What do I need to get back on track with? What do I put

00:54:18.860 in order? Change this, put this up here. This is going down here. Gosh, I'm going to have to bump that to

00:54:23.300 Thursday. And now you activate, you get back to work based on your recalibration.

00:54:28.740 Yeah. And I, and I would say most people don't recalibrate because they hold on to the expectation

00:54:36.580 of what should be. And well, I shouldn't have to. And, and then they'll just rant.

00:54:41.540 You don't have to. Yeah. You don't have to.

00:54:43.340 Complain. Yeah. And then they're just like, Oh, well, I shouldn't, I shouldn't have to deal with

00:54:48.300 this. And it's like, okay, got it, but you need to. So what are you going to do and move to action?

00:54:55.740 But we get stuck in our expectations when they're not met and you need to let it go. And I think

00:55:02.800 that's why I like the anticipate because there's two elements to the anticipate one margin and reducing

00:55:10.380 risk of what might potentially happen. But it's also gives you the mindset that something might go

00:55:16.340 wrong and that's okay. And when it does, we just learn from it. We pivot and we grow and we continue

00:55:23.880 taking action. We don't just get mad at it. Right. And sit with it. We move beyond that.

00:55:32.220 You know, I, I, I just want to throw a little bit of a different thought when you said most people

00:55:38.320 don't recalibrate. And then, and then you said you have to, it has to get done. I'm just going to

00:55:43.380 throw a little bit of a different thought. You actually don't have to. That's true. You're not

00:55:48.600 obligated to do. You can. And most people do. And then the same stuff keeps happening and it keeps

00:55:55.360 breaking down. And, and when you say you have to do it, like you have to get it done. I think there's

00:56:00.420 a little bit of loss of autonomy. There's a little bit of a loss of authority of over your own life.

00:56:06.140 And now it's a sense of obligation as, as opposed to a sense of choice.

00:56:13.600 Yeah. And so you don't have to do that. You don't need to do that, but you get the opportunity to do

00:56:20.320 it. You should do it. You should want to do it. And what I think that little mindset shift does

00:56:25.180 is it gives you power. It says, I'm in control of this. I actually do have more control over the

00:56:33.060 thing, not working, the system breaking down, the distractions that come into my life. And if you

00:56:38.080 have power over it, you have the power to do something about it. And I think choice is huge

00:56:46.160 for guys. If you're choosing, you don't have to go to the gym, but you choose to, you don't have to

00:56:52.680 put down that double bacon cheeseburger that you really want, but you chose to do that. And that's

00:56:57.740 empowering. Totally. Well, and what's great about it, Ryan is, is how much different do we show up

00:57:05.020 in those examples when it's out of choice versus I have to like grab the guy that feels like he has

00:57:14.160 to go to the gym because his wife will berate him or his doctors, you know, like, uh, blah, blah, 0.91

00:57:22.200 I have to do it. Compare his workout to the guy of I'm choosing to drastic difference, drastic

00:57:31.300 difference. Can I share something? I know this sounds, this, it relates to this. And, and I wrote

00:57:38.240 this down yesterday. I was, I was sitting at church and, and I wrote this down and it, and it resonates,

00:57:46.460 or at least it really connects to this idea of, of choice when, and it's, it's around repentance.

00:57:53.900 So it's a little bit of a shift here, but when repentance is approached without learning,

00:57:59.660 it evolves, it devolves into mere compliance. We check boxes, we avoid certain behavior,

00:58:08.100 we meet minimum standards, but we miss the transformation. True repentance is not about

00:58:14.860 compliance. It's about growth without learning from sin, allowing the spirit to teach us and

00:58:21.800 turning to Christ for change. Repentance stalls. It becomes shallow rule keeping instead of the deep

00:58:28.660 conversion that lifts us towards holiness. You can grab that same concept and apply to everything

00:58:36.220 as you're going to the gym compliance, or is it rooted in choice in learning and growth and

00:58:43.200 opportunity? Or are you just trying to be compliant to keep the peace, right? In these other areas of

00:58:50.040 our lives, whether it's our jobs, going to the gym, our spiritual beliefs. I mean, it, I think it's

00:58:57.300 transcended and changes how we show up in this world and the growth that's available to us.

00:59:03.640 Well, and you know, Kip, we're talking about choosing to do all the things that you want to do,

00:59:07.580 but I also think there's another angle too. And I love the quote that you shared.

00:59:11.380 You also have a choice as to what you don't do.

00:59:16.140 Yeah. So you can choose not to engage in behavior that you know is not conducive to your growth.

00:59:21.420 You can choose not to sit on that board. You're not obligated to, you can choose that because that

00:59:26.300 leaves you the opportunity to choose something different. That's more in alignment with what

00:59:30.120 you're after. You have complete control over your life. And even if you don't have control over every

00:59:36.160 aspect of your life, this is something that I learned from Viktor Frankl and Man's Search for

00:59:40.140 Meaning, you still have control over how you respond to the circumstances you find yourself in.

00:59:46.380 You know, we, contrary to popular belief, we are confronted with all sorts of experiences and

00:59:52.460 conversations and relationships that are beyond our control, but still impact us deeply.

00:59:59.060 And it's your decision to respond appropriately that I think spells the difference between whether or

01:00:06.680 not that's going to be something potentially catastrophic in your life or something that

01:00:11.240 could greatly serve you.

01:00:14.280 Yeah, absolutely. Love it, man. I mean, we filled questions from Facebook. Obviously, I think that's

01:00:20.380 a good call out, you know, join us there on Facebook. If you guys have it, that's facebook.com

01:00:25.020 slash group slash order of man. Ryan, I should, I, we should have confirmed this right before we hit

01:00:31.200 record. What's our enrollment in the IC? Well, so we're doing, it's September 15th. We're doing

01:00:39.320 something a little bit different. And what we're doing this iteration is on September 15th. When you

01:00:45.660 join us in the iron council, we don't just throw you to the wolves. We never did that anyways, but I'm

01:00:49.640 just using that terminology. We don't just throw you in the mix and say, figure it out. Good luck.

01:00:54.060 And I feel like maybe we were kind of doing that. And I've seen a lot of other groups that have

01:00:58.760 popped up where they're like, here, just do this thing. And it's, it's just not real conducive to

01:01:04.000 what I really wanted to create for these guys. So we're doing it differently. What we're going to do

01:01:08.020 is when anybody joins the iron council, they are going to get teamed up with what we call an iron

01:01:13.660 council coach Kip. And you're heading up the iron council coaches. You're putting together the

01:01:18.400 curriculum and the training and the, um, and the, the, everything that goes behind it.

01:01:23.600 It's kind of the guide around it. Yeah. Yeah. So when, when you join the iron council,

01:01:28.020 you're going to get a message and an email, and it's going to introduce you to the systems that we

01:01:33.020 use, but then it's also going to get you in touch with your coach and your coach is going to work you

01:01:37.980 through the foundational process of the iron council and get you onto a team of a small group of team,

01:01:44.400 excuse me, a small team of men who are going to help hold you accountable, help you identify goals,

01:01:51.580 keep you on track towards those goals, push you, hold your feet to the fire, celebrate when you

01:01:56.720 achieve, sit with you when things go South. It's pretty incredible when you get yourself on a team,

01:02:02.740 but there's a process to get there. And we know exactly what it is because we've been doing this for

01:02:06.960 10 years and we have over 10,000 men who have gone through this program and we want to make sure

01:02:12.020 it's as effective as possible. So you can signed up, um, September 15th, or if you want to skip the

01:02:18.260 line and do it early, I just got three emails on Friday because they listened to the Friday field

01:02:22.440 notes. If you're ready to get going and be assigned the one-to-one coach, then just email me

01:02:28.660 ryan at order of man.com and put coaching in a subject line. If you do that, then I will allow you

01:02:36.640 to skip the line before September 15th, get you assigned to a coach immediately and get you off to the races.

01:02:42.020 As soon as possible. Love it. Love it. So such a great example of how things work.

01:02:51.720 How do you mean? Like, and you're, well, you want something, guess what you do?

01:02:57.840 You don't wait and hope. Yeah. You shoot off an email and you say, Hey, here's an exception. I want

01:03:03.240 to be in. This is why I'm willing to commit. Put me in coach. Right. You ask to be put in the game.

01:03:09.100 Yeah. You don't wait. Right. And those are the kind of caliber of guys that are usually attracted

01:03:15.460 to the iron council. Um, and what we probably preach, I think fairly well in the IC is be

01:03:22.080 assertive. Right. And, and, and, and move to action. That's great. Definitely. Well, cool,

01:03:28.600 brother. I appreciate you again, guys head to order of man.com slash iron council. Really good

01:03:32.500 questions. Uh, next week we're going to do a different topic. We don't know what it is quite

01:03:35.980 yet, but it might be around the world of money. So make sure you're subscribed. Make sure you're

01:03:41.280 asking questions, be in the Facebook group, be in the iron council, send me an email if you want

01:03:45.820 coaching and we'll start getting after it, but, uh, we'll be back on Friday until then go out there,

01:03:50.340 take action and become the man you are meant to be.

01:03:57.620 Thank you for listening to the order of man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your life

01:04:02.180 and be more of the man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at order of man.com.

Order of Man - September 10, 2025

Work⧸Life Balance is a Myth, Re-Focusing Your Energy, and When Plans Go Wrong ｜ ASK ME ANYTHING

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