00:06:49.220to shut off emotionally i'm hearing like an openness yeah practicing opening yeah because
00:06:58.060it's so true like a closed off that and like see they're like when they say that about men
00:07:03.780like men are closed off you're trying to teach men to emote like women um
00:07:08.440so you're teaching men to communicate emotions like women do and women don't communicate like us
00:07:15.580or men don't communicate like women so they're effectively communicating that uh being masculine
00:07:22.060is wrong and the closed off could lead to just impatience it could lead to whatever it is i'm
00:07:28.700trying so much to just be like when that happens it's like elliot shoulders back take a few breaths
00:07:35.260it really makes a difference but when we are organized through this such a strict rigid
00:07:40.140system the pressure to conform we don't realize how that pressure to conform is suppressing our
00:07:46.620health restricting our nervous system this is kind of what i was like thinking about about being in
00:07:51.580love and the ah the relaxation and my my journey with gender and sexuality has like opened up so
00:07:59.420much since becoming a parent the physical experience of of making a person and then
00:08:05.260getting that person out of my body like that has been a huge touchstone for me for opening up my
00:08:12.540own pressure to conform like it was in my pregnancy that i realized i identify as non-binary as a
00:08:20.300non-binary woman in pregnancy and that was when my sex like opened up and actually i was able to
00:08:27.500finally take in the relax and the surrendering to my partner that i i didn't realize i didn't even
00:08:33.820know how tightly i was holding on to it but it is that pressure to conform that restricts us
00:08:41.180that we don't even know we're being held so tightly by and it's it's painful for everybody
00:08:47.900it's it's so it's so um it's cruel you saying cruelty as related to the patriarchy it's
00:08:55.180unfortunate it's so incredible that these women are paid to act talk and do really relatively0.53
00:09:00.620easy jobs for a living uh hypocritical i know i have an easy job i have an easy job i have one0.98
00:09:06.220it has its challenges but it's not the same as like the coal mine or whatever bullshit so0.95
00:09:11.300um sorry not bullshit but you know what i mean like that all that stuff is way harder
00:09:16.380hierarchy of hard jobs i'm at the bottom so anyways my my point really with this is um0.98
00:09:24.640it's just incredible how women can be paid to talk into a microphone and still complain
00:09:30.240women can be paid to talk into a microphone and then complain about oppression with the microphone
00:09:34.720that men sacrifice their bodies to build so true you know the trans experience of finding your
00:09:41.800comfort in your body is particularly visible and yours as a person who's been famous for so long
00:09:48.440is particularly pronounced but this is actually uh emblematic of how everybody feels in this
00:09:55.600society wrong in their bodies i the as women being told we're too fat we're too thin not curvy enough
00:10:02.620too curvy men cis men are taking tea no okay oh you've got to be i mean you're chopped the reason
00:10:08.420you're told you're too fat too thin is because you're chopped if you look like um a beautiful0.97
00:10:12.720woman then you get compliments um ugly men don't get complimented either this men take tea and then0.98
00:10:18.000are uh loudly transphobic you know podcasters whatever and we're missing this we're missing
00:10:25.440this opportunity for the trans experience to be this like just uh particularly pronounced
00:10:35.440and accessible example of finding your true self one thing i feel really fortunate about about like
00:10:44.720what does your true self mean you know that's because women are fit you know i bet women say
00:10:53.380my true self because women are so used to being fake all the time that we don't even know what0.63
00:10:57.660our true self is you know what i mean because we're just so fake so getting nominated for an0.95
00:11:04.160oscar when i was 20 or whatever and having that happen when i was so young and in that period
00:11:12.560feeling the worst like absolutely just not okay and those in those years following and to learn
00:11:22.440can you imagine getting an oscar and still complaining ninja please in that lesson so young
00:11:28.320like to go like i actually don't care that's not what i care about and something's not okay here
00:11:37.260And like to be in a place now where I can like reflect on that and then just sort of where my priorities are, where they are creatively, like there's just, I feel so lucky to have learned that young, that you could have this thing that everyone's saying is the dream come true and people's obsession with fame and, you know, or what success means and don't get me.
00:12:00.060This is the problem with people never having had a real job is that they don't know what it's like to spend five years at a job you hate that builds character.